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shion-yu · 3 months

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Not Your Fault (part 1)

Part 1! Alex, Shu’s foster son, is suspended and not feeling well. Ryo is his safe place. For my @badthingshappenbingo space space “Leave Me Alone.” Original work, 2,718 words, no TW, CW mentions of past parental drug use/death, Alex is 13 here.

Alex's mom never cared whether or not he showed up to school as long as he stayed out of her way, so he didn't understand why Shu thought it was such a big deal when he played hooky or cut the classes he didn't like. Now was being suspended for the third time in the school year since coming to live with Shu, this time for calling the teacher a bitch when she pointed out his absence during fourth period. He'd shown up during her class, so why the hell did she care about the last class? It's not like he had been doing anything bad - he'd been taking a nap in the old science lab nursing a headache that wouldn't go away.

Not that he told them that, but it made him so angry that they assumed he was always up to trouble that he didn't bother. They probably wouldn't have believed him anyways.

He ended up in the office until Shu had to leave work again to talk to the principal and school counselor, and then brought Alex home for the rest of the week where he was to write a formal letter of apology to the teacher. Alex had tried to refuse, but Shu interrupted him loudly saying, "He'll do it," and dragged him home.

The drive back was near silent. Alex crossed his arms defensively and leaned against the door, staring out the window as they drove back to Shu's small two bedroom home. Alex pressed his forehead against the cold glass. It helped the persistent headache a little, but not much. They were just around the block when Shu said, "The principal told me usually the policy is three suspensions in one year and you're out. But given your situation they'll give you one more chance."

Alex could tell Shu wanted him to take this as a sign to shape up, but instead he scowled and said, "Whoop dee doo," with the utmost sarcasm.

Shu winced and was quiet again until they pulled into the driveway of the house. Alex quickly unbuckled and was ready to jump out of the car but Shu said, "Alex, wait."

Listening to Shu was not Alex's forté. He was fourteen and didn't feel like listening to anybody, let alone the prim and proper Shu who just happened to be fostering him. Alex wondered more than once if Shu was just doing it for the check and had decided he'd make it as not-worth it as possible to test that theory. It required no extra work - Alex was always unpleasant without trying.

Alex yanked at the car door handle to exit but Shu hit the automatic locks before he could. "What?" Alex snapped, facing him indignantly. Shu opened his mouth, then closed it. He looked like he couldn't figure out how he wanted to answer Alex. Alex rolled his eyes. This was a waste of time and he didn't have the resolve to wait for idiot Shu any longer. He wanted to get into bed and hide under the covers where he could shut out the whole world. He turned to open the door again when Shu put a hand on his forearm. Alex flinched and pulled it away immediately, gripping his arm with the other hand as if Shu had burned him. "What the fuck? Don't touch me!"

Shu held his hands up defensively. "Sorry, sorry," he said. Alex glared venomously at him. He hated being touched and Shu knew that. "But Alex, please, if you get expelled I don't know if I can keep you. They might take you away from me." Shu sounded like he was pleading and it just made Alex more angry. He didn't want to play this stupid game with Shu; he didn’t want to listen to Shu pretend to care.

"So? I told you to leave me alone," Alex snapped defiantly. "It's not like you're my dad."

"And I'm not trying to be," Shu said. "But I am trying to be your guardian, and that means I want the best for you. One of my coworkers said they took their sister's foster kid away when he got expelled. I don't want that to happen to us."

"Why not?" Alex said, eyes flashing dangerously in anger. "You'd be way happier without me."

"That's not true," Shu said sadly. "I don't want to lose you."

"Why?" Alex challenged him. "I make your life hell when you were living your perfect little suburban life before me."

"It's true that life was easier," Shu said, surprising Alex with his honesty for once. "But it was also empty. You're right, I'm not your dad. But I am your family now and I think you're a really great kid."

Alex looked at Shu like he was insane. "Great kid? I literally just got suspended and the only reason I'm not expelled is ‘coz the principal feels bad I'm messed up." Or Mr. Goodson just thought it was a bad look to expel the kid whose mom died blowing up the meth lab inside their apartment only a few months ago. Alex didn't know and he didn't care. He hated when people felt bad for him. His head pulsed painfully.

“The reason you’re not suspended is because I begged him for one more chance,” Shu said. Oh, so that's what Shu was doing when he took so long just him and Mr. Goodson in the office for like an hour while Alex sat on the bench in the corner picking skin off his cuticles. "I told him I couldn't lose you."

"Lose me? Like a puppy?" Alex snarled. "This is dumb. Get a dog if you're lonely. I'll only hurt you." He opened the door and stalked down the suburban sidewalk with his hands shoved in his pockets.

"Where are you going?" He heard Shu’s desperate voice call after him.

"Leave me alone!" Alex shouted, not looking back. His head throbbed and he swallowed back some nausea that had risen to his throat. Ugh, it was still annoyingly cold for early April. Alex shivered and wrapped his arms around himself as he stalked down the street angrily. He needed a cigarette, but this stupid neighborhood wasn't the kind where he could just pay someone at the corner store to buy him some. It was too nice for that shit to fly around here.

Alex walked the three blocks to Ryo's house before remembering Ryo was still at school. It didn't matter, he would still rather be here. Alex scaled the wooden privacy fence easily and then climbed into the tree house that sat in a tree in Ryo's backyard. In the months since they'd become friends, Alex had found this to be his favorite place. Shu didn't know about it and nobody came up here to bother him. It was just him and Ryo, or right now, just him.

Alex felt a chill go through him and he pulled his knees up close to his chest. Usually when they came up here to hang out Ryo would bring a blanket, but they hadn't left one up here this time. Alex coughed into his crossed arms, which reminded him how much his throat and head hurt. The cold, wooden platform was uncomfortable but it was quiet and Alex found his eyes drooping in no time.

Shu definitely thought he was off causing trouble, Alex thought to himself. The guy acted nice, but in the end he was probably the same as all of the adults. Ready to throw him away as soon as he became too inconvenient or got in the way. Shu had lasted a lot longer than Alex had expected, but it wouldn’t be for much longer at this rate.

"Alex?"

Alex startled awake to find Ryo at the entrance of the treehouse, peering at him curiously. "What're you doing here?" Alex mumbled.

"It's my backyard," Ryo laughed and climbed the rest of the way in. He sat in front of Alex cross legged. "You're shivering."

"S'cold."

"It's not that cold," Ryo said, frowning. He took off his own jacket and wrapped it around Alex. "Are you okay?"

"Fine," Alex grunted. "Suspended again. Is school already over?"

"Yeah," Ryo said. "Mom told me Shu called the house to see if you were here. She said you weren't, but she didn't check up here."

Alex managed a thin smile. "But you knew to check?"

"Course," Ryo grinned back. They looked at each other for a long moment which was broken only by Alex quickly ducking his face into his elbow and sneezing loudly.

"Heeee' etchiew! Guh..."

The congestion that the sneeze moved around tickled Alex's throat and he began to cough roughly. Ryo grimaced. "Let's go to my bedroom," he said. "You don't look so good."

"I'mb find," Alex said stuffily, his voice betraying him. He shivered, his body also doing him no favors in hiding his apparent unwellness. *"Don't you have homew - wah... W'etchiew! Ugh. Homb worgk?"

"I won't be able to concentrate on it knowing you're up here sick," Ryo said, ignoring Alex's immediate retort of "Ndot sick." "You can warm up in my bed, how's that?" The temptation of being under the covers in Ryo's comfy bed was too much when Alex was feeling so cold and achy, so he gave in and they climbed down from the treehouse one by one.

Ryo led Alex into the house. His mom was in the kitchen and looked at Alex, a little startled. Alex knew she wasn't the biggest fan of him, the new brooding bad boy hanging around her golden child. But she wasn't mean either. "Alex! Shu called looking for you."

Alex waved one hand in the air noncommittally, coughing into the other arm. "Can we have some hot chocolate mom?" Ryo asked. "We're gonna go study in my room."

"Sure honey. After I call Shu back," she said. Alex groaned internally. This meant that Shu would be at Ryo's doorstep in about ten minutes to drag him home. He wanted to take a real nap in Ryo's bed, not get nagged by Mr. Goody Two-shoes again. He'd take what he could get though and followed Ryo upstairs. He dove under the covers of Ryo's bed right away, shivering.

Ryo looked at him worriedly. "Hang on," he said, darting to the bathroom and coming back with a thermometer. "See if you have a fever?"

Alex just burrowed himself deeper under Ryo's covers, grunting, "It doesn't matter. Just let me sleep." Ryo made a pouting face but didn't push it. He sat at his desk and pulled out his school work as Alex tried to warm up, but the cold had made it down to his bones and his whole body hurt. He tried to keep from shivering as much as he could, but every few seconds a strong one would escape and wrack his entire body.

Ryo's bed smelled like him. It was strangely comforting. They had become friends rather quickly when Alex had transferred into Ryo's school that November after being placed with Shu. Alex was grouchy and sullen and refused to talk, while Ryo was constantly smiling. At first Alex tried to ignore his overly eager classmate, but opposites attracted and somehow they became an unlikely, but inseparable, pair. Ryo always just seemed to know what Alex wanted, even if Alex refused to admit it himself. He was good at talking on Alex's behalf and treated Alex like a normal person rather than a feral animal to be poked with a yardstick. He was cheeky and loud and annoying, but Alex stuck with him for reasons he didn't quite understand. Ryo just made him feel safer and he never asked any questions about his past.

Alex didn't realize he'd fallen asleep until he heard Shu's voice murmuring in low tones. He was finally warm and comfortable hidden under Ryo's sheets, he didn't want to leave... He waited for Shu to pull back the covers, but he didn't. Alex's eyes grew heavy again and before he knew it, he'd drifted back asleep.

It was dark when Alex finally emerged, stiff and coughing. Thick gunk was coming up now, making it hard to deny he'd moved from the sniffles into a full blown chest cold. He groaned and sat up, looking around. He was alone in the bedroom, but he could hear voices downstairs. He wrapped the throw blanket around himself and slunk down the stairs, looking for Ryo. Alex found him sitting at the dinner table with his parents and Shu, laughing. Confused, Alex thought maybe he was still dreaming. But Ryo noticed him immediately and let out a happy, "Alex!"

Alex blinked at the scene. "What's going on?" He asked hesitantly. The adults were all eyeing him with something close to pity. Ryo jumped up and dragged another chair to the table from the kitchen, patting it for Alex to sit down in.

"I didn't want to wake you up," Shu explained. "Ryo said you have a fever. How do you feel?"

"Fine," Alex lied, sitting in his newly designated chair next to Ryo. In reality he looked pretty miserable, blonde hair sticking up in all directions, nose red, voice stuffy and eyes bloodshot. He hadn't felt this sick this morning, he thought. Maybe the nap outside in the treehouse while he was already coming down with something hadn't been such a good idea.

"Are you hungry?" Ryo's mom asked. Alex shook his head no. The others seemed like they were about done and Shu stood up.

"Shall we get going?" He asked Alex, looking at Alex hopefully. Alex shrugged. It was as close to a yes as Shu was going to get. Shu thanked Ryo's parents repeatedly and Ryo gave Alex a quick hug. This was a new thing, and Ryo was the only person allowed to do it. Alex and Shu went to Shu's car and Shu drove them home.

"Mrs. Fujioka said you're welcome any time, but you ought to let me know first," Shu said. "I'd appreciate that too. I won't say no. Ryo's a good kid."

'Unlike me,' Alex supplied silently. He coughed, wincing when it sounded much wetter than the one he'd woken up with it. He'd managed to avoid Shu at breakfast so Shu wouldn't notice, but there was no point in hiding it now.

"You sound like you need to be in bed," Shu glanced at him, frowning. "How long have you been feeling sick?"

Alex didn't answer. Yesterday after school he'd started feeling off though, and he was pretty sure he'd had a fever and chills last night too because it had been impossible to get warm.

Shu sighed. "Alex, if you hadn't felt well you didn't have to go to school," he said. Alex shrugged. He hadn't wanted Shu to know, because he hadn't wanted to answer tedious questions exactly like this. "You can talk to me," Shu added.

Alex had heard so many people say that in his life who absolutely did not mean it. He wouldn't start believing it now, even if Shu was nice and never seemed to get mad at him no matter what trouble he stirred up. It was a miracle really - Alex wasn't sure he'd ever met someone as patient as Shu. He was still wary though, because that could always change someday, couldn't it?

They parked in the driveway and went into the house. Shu asked him if he was hungry again and Alex shook his head no. He just wanted to sleep. He changed into pajamas and crawled into his own bed, regretting it wasn't as warm as Ryo's had felt. Shu came in with a glass of water and two Tylenol, which he offered Alex. Alex downed them wordlessly and then flopped under the covers.

"Come get me if you feel worse, or if you need anything,” Shu told him. Once again, no answer. Alex had no intentions of going to get Shu like a little kid. He had taken care of himself for thirteen years just fine - a little cold wasn’t going to push him over the edge. He waited for Shu to leave the room before he fell asleep thinking about how Ryo had hugged him and how warm it had felt.