#of course we have cas even in dialogue pointing out how

[iwillbringyouruin]

Radskier dialogue nuances in different languages

So I have been rewatching The Witcher in French recently and some of the changed lines stuck out to me, in the interactions between Radovid and Jaskier in particular. So i figured I'd compile my favourites from the translated versions I've seen so far here and compare their meaning to the original. I've also included some of the German lines since I'm German and I got curious!

Disclaimer: I'm just a guy who speaks a bunch of languages, don't expect overly technical linguistic wizardry here. Also this is not about the voice actors' skill or how well the lines are matched up to lip movements, strictly about the little changes in meaning when you take the translations literally! All meant to be in good fun.

Since this is about the season 3 dialogue, there are spoilers ahead.

This is going to be a long post so buckle up!

Season 3 in general: The way Jaskier and Radovid address one another

English (original): both use "you" which makes sense of course

French: Jaskier uses "vous" (the formal "you") for Radovid and Radovid uses "tu" (the casual "you") for Jaskier until they have sex in episode 4. When they talk the morning after in episode 6, they're both using "tu".

German: both use "Ihr" and the other formal derivatives for one another throughout (Even Geralt and Jaskier address each other formally the whole time. I'm not a fan)

Episode 1: Jaskier and Radovid meet

The dialogue here is generally very close, just two little things between the original and the German version I want to point out.

English (Jaskier): Fuck, I don’t really know what I’m supposed to… Bow? Or curtsy, or… I’ve been holding your hand a long time, so sorry about that.

German (Jaskier): Shit, I don't know if I'm supposed to bow or be polite... I've been holding your hand for too long, forgive me ("bow or be polite"?? HUH?)

English (Radovid): If your time at court’s been staid, you’ve been doing it wrong

German (Radovid): If your time at court has been too calm/quiet, something went wrong ([gay silence])

Episode 2: specifically Extraordinary Things

I've put the different lyrics as rather direct translations in the pictures below. They're also written out in the alt text. The French ones are a little more pointed compared to the original imo, I like that version a lot. I'm not sure how I feel about the German version but the first line did make me giggle.

Episode 3: Jaskier talks to Vespula about Radovid

I love this scene for many reasons. I have two things to point out about this.

The first thing is that while in the English and French version, Jaskier says that he and Radovid have only met twice, in the German version he says that he and Radovid don't even know each other.

The second thing is that in the English and German version, Jaskier calls Radovid a spoon and he does in the French version as well. However, he specifies Radovid is a "little spoon" here. Need I say more?

Episode 4: the scene in the shed

Ah, the scene of all time. Before the other scene of all time in episode 6. A few things about this one. The first thing is a very small change in the French version:

English (Jaskier, after Radovid admits he's scared): Just saying that makes you braver than you know.

French (Jaskier, after Radovid admits he's scared): The fact you're admitting that proves you are brave

The second thing bothered me more because it isn't really a subtle change. Both in English and French, Jaskier says Radovid has "learned [his] song", but in German he says Radovid "knows [his] song". The German line here isn't saying that Radovid "knows" the song as in he knows how to play it (from hearing and watching Jaskier play it for him once, mind you), the way it's said makes it sound like Radovid has just heard the song before.

The third thing is what they're saying right after the kiss. Unfortunately with the slightly changed lines for Jaskier we don't get the clever connection between Jaskier talking about taking Radovid into the cabin and Radovid asking Jaskier to take him (sexually).

English (Jaskier): I can't take you inside, I'm sorry.

English (Radovid): Then take me here.

French (Jaskier): The cabin is occupied, I'm sorry.

French (Radovid): Then take me here.

German (Jaskier): We can't go inside, I'm sorry.

German (Radovid): Then take me here.

Episode 6: the morning after

The German version is the same as the original here.

English (Jaskier to Radovid): I thought I’d seen through your mask. Turns out there was nothing behind it.

French (Jaskier to Radovid): I thought I had lifted the veil from your soul. But I found nothing but darkness beneath that façade

The subtle differences in the French version on the other hand not only make the pain a little different, it also includes an allusion of sorts to that version of Extraordinary Things with Jaskier talking about Radovid's soul. At least that's how I saw it. Ouch!

Episode 7: the moment where Jaskier finds Radovid at Thanedd

All three versions here make me want to cry. That's all.

English (Radovid): Just let me be there with you. Prove that I’m more than a mask.

English (Jaskier): Maybe.

French (Radovid): Just let me stay with you and show you what is beneath this façade.

French (Jaskier): Why not.

German (Radovid): Just let me be with you and show my true self.

German (Jaskier): Maybe.

#radskier #jaskovid #radovid #jaskier #the witcher #the witcher netflix #the witcher meta #twn s3 #the witcher season 3 #i made myself sad

[angelinthefire]

i can't decide between cute shit and timestamp

Re: this tag game

Thank you for asking!

"Cute shit"

So this is a pretty generic post-15x19, Cas-is-back-from-the-Empty fic. The setup is a lot like "Status quo ante bellum", in that Dean is still working towards fully expressing his feelings towards Cas, and Cas isn't sure where he stands. But Dean is being pretty clearly clingy, so Cas doesn't have the intense anxiety that he does in "Status quo". They go on the clown-mask-vampire hunt, Dean gets impaled, but Cas is there to heal him. But because Dean was so badly injured, it takes a lot out of Cas, and he passes out. Sam and Dean take Cas back to the motel and get him a room, and Dean stays with him overnight. The excerpt picks up the next morning. It's mostly just dialogue.

Cas wakes up first. Frozen, kind of terrified. 

Dean is snuggled into him by now. 

Dean wakes up. Jerks away in shock but recovers quickly.

Cas looks at him nervously.

Dean smiles bashfully, "Hope I didn’t wake you up?"

C: "No you didn’t"

D: "Good. How’re you doing? Anything screwed up?"

C: "No, I’m better."

D: Sighs, relieved. "I was scared."

C: Raises his eyebrows. "You were scared for me?"

D: "‘Course."

C: "Dean, you could’ve died." 

D: "Yeah that scared me too."

C: "Yeah. Me too."

D: "But… if I died… you’d come see me, right? Sneak into my memory box, wake me up? And we could just… hang out on the holodeck?"

C: "It’s a poor substitute for life."

D: "But you’d do it?"

C: (softly) "Yeah."

D: "Good. Y’know, I think… I mean… I wanna spend forever with you."

Cas stares, entirely disarmed. 

Dean’s eyes fall to his lips. 

He leans in. Cas is very still, and closes his eyes. Dean kisses him very softly.

Cas’ eyes are still closed when he pulls away.

Cas opens his eyes. Looks unsettled.

So Dean kisses him again. This time something clicks with Cas and he starts to kiss him back.

2. Timestamp

This is the scene from "Forget your perfect offering" in chapter 4 where Claire goes off to talk to Dean in the kitchen. I wrote the dialogue when I wrote the chapter, so that I would have a clear idea of what was happening with Dean, even though I never intended to post it with the fic. I'm actually pretty sure that I posted it on tumblr at some point, but I can't find it now.

The setup is that Dean is trying to give Cas what he wants so that he'll stay. And Jody, Kaia and Claire come over for a family dinner. And Dean basically tells Claire not to screw it up with her attitude. But he apologizes later, and that's when this scene takes place. Under the cut.

Dean feels bad for telling Claire not to be a weirdo, and asks her to help him with dessert so they can talk in the kitchen.

Dean: Sorry for being, y’know…

Claire: An asshole?

D: Yeah. I guess this whole thing’s got me on-edge.

C: What whole thing?

D: Y’know. Being with Cas. It’s a mindfuck. I mean, you get it, right?

C: Get what?

D: You know…

Claire stares at him.

D: Suddenly being different from how you thought you were.

Claire keeps staring at him.

D: Oh, come on. Your dad was all into Jesus. He didn’t raise you to think being gay was normal. Don’t you ever get hung up on what he’d think if he saw you today?

C: (getting agitated) No, I don’t, because he’s dead. And I had an angel in me, so I know that none of that shit matters.

D: Yeah, but when you started being into girls, you’re saying you didn’t ever worry what other people would think?

C: What the hell, I’m not your therapist, Dean!

D: Yeah. Right. Sorry.

C: (softening, just a little) I get that you need someone to talk to about this crap. But did you think that maybe that someone should be your boyfriend?

D: Talk to Cas? The dude spent eternity as, like, a giant lightbulb or something. I don’t think he knows what it’s like for everyone he knows to suddenly see him as some… some kinda… ugh.

Dean cuts into the rice krispie squares. Claire regards him cooly. The way Dean said "some kinda" gets under her skin.

Claire leans over the counter, and says to Dean in a low, icy voice.

C: Faggot.

Dean freezes and stares at Claire like she just slapped him.

D: What?

C: That’s what you were gonna say, right? That's what you are now.

Dean looks at Claire like he’s about to cry.

C: And you can wear your plaid, and carry a gun and talk like Batman, but that won't change the fact that that's all you are to some people. They'll see you and Cas together and that'll be it, they'll never see you as anything but dirty and wrong and weak. And I dunno, maybe your dad would've been one of them. But you gotta decide whether or not you're going to let them control your life. You gotta decide whether all that bullshit is worth it.

Claire takes the knife from Dean and goes back to cutting the rice krispie squares.

D: (after a long beat) Yeah. Yeah, Cas is worth it.

C: (significant look) I don't mean Cas. I mean being yourself.

D: (some kind of subtexutal reminder that Dean still thinks he's not really in love with Cas) Heh. Yeah. Thanks Claire.

C: Whatever. Don't start thinking I'm your gay Yoda.

D: It’ll be hard. You give good advice. For a dyke.

C: (good natured) Pansy.

D: Queer.

C: Cocksucker.

D: Nah, that’s not till later tonight.

C: Ew!

D: What, you don’t wanna hear about my plans for Cas’ cock?

C: No! Shut up, Dean!

#spn #destiel #ask #anon #by mi #not actually fanfic #fypo

[laurelwinchester]

There is no way I will EVER believe Dean Winchester was supposed to say, "and I you." There's no way they would've written the line that way even if it HAD been written. It's so grammatically awkward out of his mouth that it makes me laugh when I see it. I'm not against the ship, but the delusion about 15x18 is unending.

honestly...yeah. i have to agree with this. it's a strange and somewhat awkward line of dialogue anyway but it is a super strange line of dialogue to attempt to give, of all people, dean winchester.

listen, i am not anti d*stiel. i'm at the point where i have no strong feelings either way for the ship itself. it mostly just makes me feel a bit bored. i believe cas was definitely in love with dean. i believed that long before he said it out loud. it was pretty obvious. i think there are different ways to interpret dean's feelings - and yes, one of those ways is that he was in love with him too. it's very possible. ultimately i just don't care enough to put any real work or feelings into that ship in any way.

but dean would not have said that.

it is so stunningly out of character that i'm genuinely boggled as to how so many people are just like ''oh good. now we have confirmation. this sounds right. this is a fact now.''

if people want to believe dean reciprocates, i get that. of course people prefer their ship to be a mutual thing. i totally understand that. i have zero problem with that. but there's just. no way dean winchester would have said it in that specific way. unless he was very suddenly and momentarily possessed by the ghost of an old english gentleman.

which, to be fair, does sound like the kind of thing that would happen to him, but that would be a weird time for it to happen.

#i will say that the overall mood of just general acceptance that this line is a fact does validate my theory that the current spn fandom #has literally no grasp on dean winchester as a character #which is sad because they have tried really really hard to replace canon dean with watered down fanon dean (a dud if i ever saw one) #and unfortunately given how widespread this is.... that appears to be working #which means that the only dean who will be remembered is the dean they made up in their heads and that's unfortunate #because that dude is terribly dull #it's sort of like they took his corpse and embalmed him and preserved him real nice #and then propped him up at the back of a party so they could make him their puppet and talk for him #and are trying to con people into believing this was always who he was #which sounds like a great horror movie but i know that's not what they're going for #BUT ANYWAY #.....also there's a very real chance that this was just a translation error #and maybe the line was just something like ''i love you too'' but was translated into ''and i you'' #and some portions of the fandom are just being too literal which.......i mean. yeah. i can see that #asks #anon #spn fandom discourse #spn discourse

[sims-4-romance-cheats-09]

sims 4 romance cheats work 27G#

💾 ►►► DOWNLOAD FILE 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 ModifyRelationship Sim1 Sim2 LTR_Friendship_Main. ModifyRelationship Sim1 Sim2 LTR_Romance_Main. Sims 4 relationship cheats let you modify relationships and friendships at will, creating or removing romances with a few keystrokes. On PC, hold CTRL and Shift, then press C. On Mac, hold Command and Shift, then press C. On PlayStation 4, hold all four shoulder buttons at once. On Xbox One. How to Use The Sims 4 Relationship Cheats? · For Microsoft Windows: Press Ctrl + Shift + Alt · For MacOS: Press Ctrl + Shift + Alt · For PS4: Press. Ah, love. Meet a partner, fall in love, get married, have a couple of baby Sims, and teach them the ways of the world as they grow up and go out into the world to meet sweethearts of their own. And just like in real life itself, building the perfect Sims 4 companionship takes time. Like, a lot of time. Just like any part of The Sims 4, there are friendship cheats you can use to enhance your health and happiness without all the heartbreak. There are, too, friendship cheats to help with those not-so-romantic interactions. Sims 4 friends can be fickle, and while it seems like your friends always want to hang out, there can be too much of a good thing! After all, The Sims 4 is a simulation game. Cheats help you enhance your experience in The Sims 4 by allowing you to play the game exactly the way you want. But this is your game, and it should be an experience you enjoy. In order to use any cheat for Sims 4, you have to enable cheats through the cheat dialogue box. If you need to deactivate cheats during the course of gameplay for any reason, you can input the reverse of this command to disable cheats. When cheating, The Sims 4 gives you full control over your Sims and their stats. This means that some of the cheats in the game have several variables you need to account for, but it means that you can tweak your Sim world to be exactly the way you want it. You can build or destroy a romance between two sims, you can create or sever friendships between Sims, and you can even increase the affinity your Sim has with cats and dogs. There are three primary cheats, and they all fall under the ModifyRelationship command. Your cheat will look like the following:. Remember, this works on cats and dogs, too! The Amount represents how much you would like to modify the relationship. A relationship between Sims can have a value between and The closer to , the closer the Sims are to being best friends. Remember, The Sims 4 is an inclusive experience that allows any two Sims to enjoy romance and fall for each other! Each object should be capitalized the same way as everything shown here. In short, you can use the cheat console to increase points or decrease points in each type of The Sims 4 companionship. You can even increase your relationships with your Sim-pets if you have the right Sims 4 mods or expansion packs! Instead, use the Sims 4 friendship and relationship cheat ModifyRelationship to alter the basic relationship stats between Sims and see how their interactions play out! You can play god in The Sims 4, but even god has to give his Simoleons free will. Of course! For other cool Sims cheat codes and tips, check out our guide to The Sims 4 skill cheats and The Sims 4 cas cheats. We cover cheats for all expansions from Discover University to Journey to Batuu. This series has so much in store for you— how will you build your ultimate Sim universe? Can You Edit Relationships in Sims 4? Dane started off gaming at the tender age of 3 with the first Atari console. Read more

[sims-4-friendship-cheat-11]

sims 4 friendship cheat 100% working O3S&

💾 ►►► DOWNLOAD FILE 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 What you'll need to do is enable your cheats and then go over to a sim you wish to add to your household or remove from your household and hold. Press Control + Shift + C to open the cheat console, a small command line in the top left corner of the screen. On console, you press all four triggers (L1/L2+. LTR_SimtoPet_Friendship_Main is the cheat that influences friendship between a Sim and their Sim-pets. You'll need the Cats and Dogs Sims 4. Method 1: Use friendship cheats · Enable cheats: Press Ctrl, Shift, and C on PC · Then, type testingcheats true to open the cheat console · Type in relationships. How to Use The Sims 4 Relationship Cheats? · For Microsoft Windows: Press Ctrl + Shift + Alt · For MacOS: Press Ctrl + Shift + Alt · For PS4: Press. Ah, love. Meet a partner, fall in love, get married, have a couple of baby Sims, and teach them the ways of the world as they grow up and go out into the world to meet sweethearts of their own. And just like in real life itself, building the perfect Sims 4 companionship takes time. Like, a lot of time. Just like any part of The Sims 4, there are friendship cheats you can use to enhance your health and happiness without all the heartbreak. There are, too, friendship cheats to help with those not-so-romantic interactions. Sims 4 friends can be fickle, and while it seems like your friends always want to hang out, there can be too much of a good thing! After all, The Sims 4 is a simulation game. Cheats help you enhance your experience in The Sims 4 by allowing you to play the game exactly the way you want. But this is your game, and it should be an experience you enjoy. In order to use any cheat for Sims 4, you have to enable cheats through the cheat dialogue box. If you need to deactivate cheats during the course of gameplay for any reason, you can input the reverse of this command to disable cheats. When cheating, The Sims 4 gives you full control over your Sims and their stats. This means that some of the cheats in the game have several variables you need to account for, but it means that you can tweak your Sim world to be exactly the way you want it. You can build or destroy a romance between two sims, you can create or sever friendships between Sims, and you can even increase the affinity your Sim has with cats and dogs. There are three primary cheats, and they all fall under the ModifyRelationship command. Your cheat will look like the following:. Remember, this works on cats and dogs, too! The Amount represents how much you would like to modify the relationship. A relationship between Sims can have a value between and The closer to , the closer the Sims are to being best friends. Remember, The Sims 4 is an inclusive experience that allows any two Sims to enjoy romance and fall for each other! Each object should be capitalized the same way as everything shown here. In short, you can use the cheat console to increase points or decrease points in each type of The Sims 4 companionship. You can even increase your relationships with your Sim-pets if you have the right Sims 4 mods or expansion packs! Instead, use the Sims 4 friendship and relationship cheat ModifyRelationship to alter the basic relationship stats between Sims and see how their interactions play out! You can play god in The Sims 4, but even god has to give his Simoleons free will. Of course! For other cool Sims cheat codes and tips, check out our guide to The Sims 4 skill cheats and The Sims 4 cas cheats. We cover cheats for all expansions from Discover University to Journey to Batuu. This series has so much in store for you— how will you build your ultimate Sim universe? Can You Edit Relationships in Sims 4? Dane started off gaming at the tender age of 3 with the first Atari console. Read more

[sanjosenewshq]

I am sorry they had been offended however their lengthy tales crammed me up

Expensive Abby: My girlfriend has a passion for lengthy tales, many occasions on the telephone, and he or she’s petty. This morning, she known as and proceeded to explain, at size, the nightmare she had skilled final evening. I attempt – I actually do – to hear, however I often find yourself pondering, What is the level of getting a protracted nightmare dialog? As a result of I used to be bored, I began utilizing the pc to lookup some meal coupons. When she discovered them, she interrupted her monologue, resulting in forwards and backwards accusations, “I interrupt you, you interrupt me,” and many others., and many others., and many others. I’ve all the time been simply uninterested in lengthy conversations about minor points or non-issues. Typically individuals criticize me as a result of I clearly do not care. How do I repair this so that individuals do not get upset after they insist on these pointless tales? Right this moment I needed to dangle up as a result of our “dialogue” was escalating. Boredom simply in Las Vegas Expensive simply bored: If this occurs recurrently, the issue could also be that you’ve a brief consideration span. Nevertheless, if that is not the case, it is time to understand that relationships are primarily based on individuals who take the time to attach with one another. This contains listening and listening in addition to talking. For those who worth your relationship along with your girlfriend, attempt to do extra. He helped her discover a compromise by stating how she had modified some lengthy monologues. Expensive Abby: I’m nearly 30 years previous, not married and don’t have any kids. I am a workaholic. I like my nieces and nephews to loss of life, and being an aunt is one in every of my all-time favourite issues. My drawback is: I do not wish to have kids. I began courting once more a number of months in the past, and it looks as if any man I am going on a date with thinks he can change my thoughts about children. I’ve private medical causes for not wanting to present beginning. After all, if you happen to met a man with children, that will be excellent! I shall be an ideal mother. So why do I get known as soiled as a result of I selected to not have kids? Everybody says I am going to change my thoughts as soon as I meet the best man, however that is not a debatable difficulty. If we’re to undertake or take into account different choices for youngsters, I’m greater than prepared. There are kids who want a house greater than I must deliver one into this world simply to go on my DNA. Please assist me perceive what I’m lacking. Unfazed in Idaho expensive breakup: Not each girl needs to have kids. that is the reality. For somebody to name you “soiled names” due to how you’re feeling is impolite judgment. Motherhood must be – and nonetheless is – a private selection, and contraception permits us the liberty to train that selection as we see match. It’s attainable that you’re within the mistaken age group. For those who give attention to older males who usually tend to have kids already, I wager you will get fewer peels and have a greater end result. There are additionally courting apps for {couples} who wish to stay childless or for many who are already dad and mom. Verify them out. Expensive Abby: This will sound sort of horrifying, however I wish to know if I ought to write a letter to my daughter and son for them to learn after my loss of life to allow them to understand how proud I’m to be their mom. Is that this factor to do? Grateful mother in the course of the west Expensive mother: I do not see something mistaken with that. Nevertheless, the very best factor to do is to go this message on to your son and daughter principally And you might be nonetheless among the many dwelling. Written by Abigail Van Buren, aka Jane Phillips, Expensive Abby, it was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069. Originally published at San Jose News HQ

#San Jose News HQ

[amwritingmeta]

Bait and Tackle...

It’s like a visual underlining of how they’re on each other’s minds. Bless their poor, lonesome hearts.

#I'm sure I'm late to the party on this one #I haven't been online much this past week but #I just loved this link between them #of course we have cas even in dialogue pointing out how #he's only in that particular shop because of something #dean told him once but #there's just so much about fish #and fish and humanity #and cas trying to catch himself some humanity but #it's not relaxing and one wonders why and #dean meanwhile is wearing a hat with a fish on it like #bait and tackle for sure cas #especially when you go from zero communication at the #start of the ep to then talking to dean to then deciding #to hell with this I am talking to sam and dean can just #fucking get a clue that I'd talk to him too if he'd just #get his head out of his ass and apologise for being a dick! #:)

[mishasminions]

The Last Time I’ll Write a Long Post About Supernatural (15x18-15x20)

15 YEARS OF WATCHING THIS SHOW. 11 YEARS OF RUNNING A BLOG ABOUT IT. IT’S BEEN QUITE A RIDE.

[15x20 Speculation + evidence at the bottom]

First off, I just wanna come clean and say, after all these years, I still think they should’ve ended at Season 5.

If you’re going to come at me with “Then why’d you stick around to watch it if you didn’t like it?”, your question is immature, and the answer is simple: I just want to know what happens next (I also love the main characters and their actors too). You can watch a show and still think it’s shit.

Call me a clown, but despite all the disappointment and trust issues that this show has given me, I would still look forward to the day where it might just turn itself around and bring back the quality it once had, or realize the potential of each story it was trying to tell, or at the very least, do justice by my favorite ship.

Never happened.

They’ve had a few good episodes here and there. I can’t imagine the SPN Universe without The Man Who Would Be King, The French Mistake, and Scoobynatural. Seasons 6-10 were enjoyable at times. I blocked out most of 7 & 11-15. 

If you’ve been following this blog since its heydays in 2010-2014, you’d know I’d try my best to defend Destiel and this show’s decisions regarding it no matter what.

Because you know what, as a CONCEPT, this show is good. If you take a look at all the worlds its storylines have birthed in fanfiction/fanworks, you’d see how much Supernatural has wasted its own story arcs. The writing got shittier as each season progressed, and they’ve obviously given up in production as well because the quality in the execution has noticeably gone down too, but if you take a step back and take a look at the bigger picture, you’ll see that this show still tries to make sense of itself.

[If you’re still following this post, please bear with me, I know this is long, but I just want you to understand how jaded and pessimistic I am with regards to this show, so maybe you can buy into whatever hopeful thing I’m about to say later on.]

SO LET’S TALK ABOUT DESTIEL

Never in my wildest dreams did I think that they would give us Castiel’s “I love you” speech. To the point where, if I weren’t so desperate for it, I would argue that it was completely out of character for him to word vomit the way he did (but I’m not gonna diss on that right now because I’ll take what I can get).

I’ve valued every meaningful and obscure exchange that Dean and Cas have had in the earlier seasons, and I was willing to accept their relationship as just that--undefined, without any clear boundaries as to what they really are. And I think that was beautiful on its own.

But now, they’ve chosen to define it.

After they’ve driven every possible wedge between Dean and Castiel in seasons 11-15, to try to explain away their feelings as something they offer to a collective.

Dean can’t mourn and pray for JUST Cas, he has to mourn and pray for EVERYBODY--even Crowley, even some chick he just met, because god forbid he cries about just the guy who has given up everything for him--that would be “too homo”.

They’ve even set Cas on a path to abrupt fatherhood just so he can care about something other than Dean. Make it seem as if Dean wasn’t his purpose through and through.

And after all these years of this stupid show trying to deny it, they choose to acknowledge it at the worst possible circumstance, at a time where they’ve been so far apart, that it seems so foreign for them to suddenly come together.

But here we are. And they’ve chosen to tell us.

Chosen to tell us that everything that Castiel has done leading up to his death, he has done it because he was IN LOVE WITH DEAN WINCHESTER.

Chosen to tell us that the ONE THING THAT WOULD MAKE CAS HAPPY IS DEAN WINCHESTER.

Chosen to tell us that BEING WITH DEAN WINCHESTER is something that CAS WANTS BUT KNOWS HE CAN’T HAVE.

And they’ve also chosen to tell us nothing about how Dean feels.

Sure, finding out your angel made a deal, the stipulations of said deal, his newfound happiness philosophy, his long-winded monologue of why he loves you and why you’re worthy of his love, and to top it all off he tells you that being in love with you is enough to make him happy while he subtly hints that he’s always wanted to be WITH you romantically, was a lot to process in the 5 minutes after you’ve just had an existential crisis.

It’s whatever, right? Let’s culminate 11 years worth of tension and feelings in 5 minutes. Let’s waste the entire episode with cringey expository dialogue, and irrelevant sequences. The whole season was a waste anyway.

You know what Supernatural? FUCK YOU FOR THAT. They deserved better. WE deserve better.

And I would love nothing more than to hurl every possible insult your way,

But for the last time, I’m going to HOPE that you’re finally going to try to make it better for the fans that stuck by you all these years.

No more baiting new viewers, no more placating casual viewers, no more excuses. 15 years. Bring it home for the people who have actually been around.

SO HERE’S HOW I THINK 15x20 IS GONNA GO

There’s two ways this series is gonna end. Horribly or Spectacularly.

First let’s all take into consideration what Andrew Dabb says about it:

So, let’s start with

ENDING HORRIBLY

In this scenario, Misha is telling the truth about his last day of filming being 15x18. His “camping trip” during the last few days of filming 15x20, was actually a camping trip. He doesn’t go to Vancouver to shoot.

Jensen wasn’t “being careful” during the zoom interviews that it was just him and Jared quarantining for the shoot, it really was just him and Jared (althought most of these were done pre 15x19) Supernatural isn’t smart enough to do misleading PR, and they’re once again oblivious to the potential of their own story.

Misha hasn’t posted a “Goodbye Castiel” tweet because he’s probably saving it for last episode or he forgot because it was overshadowed by the Destiel trend that night.

So what we get is:

Sam and Dean are on the road again, up against the monster of the week. Only their world no longer has actual Supernatural beings anymore, so the monsters they’re fighting are humans.

Humans end up killing the Winchesters (despite having gone up against literally every powerful being imaginable INCLUDING God himself). Dean and Sam end up in heaven and relive their greatest hits.

Meanwhile, Castiel rots in The Empty because he died after realizing that he was happy and gay. Jack doesn’t bother rescuing him—his surrogate dad, the guy who made this specific deal to spare him—even though it was so easy for him get Cas in and out of The Empty when he had a fraction of the power that he has now.

Dean never speaks of Castiel’s confession because despite all the hints of a profound bond in the earlier seasons, and the fact that Dean has never cared for anyone (who isn’t his actual brother) as immensely as he does Cas, Supernatural just can’t have its main macho character be “suddenly bisexual” because that would hurt the male ego or some shit.

His heaven would probably be living happily ever after with his family. “Family” meaning Mary and John Winchester--two of the shittiest parents ever (but they’re not going to include them in this episode like they were supposed to because of Covid) and Sam.

Sam also gets a dog. As usual.

I wouldn’t put it past Supernatural to do this. After everything they’ve pulled, this would be right up their alley. I actually expect this ending.

Anyway, onto the next possible ending

ENDING SPECTACULARLY

In this scenario, Supernatural tries to stick the landing, and Jensen’s whole “It didn’t sit well with me at first, but then I took a step back after talking to Kripke, and realized that I had to view it from an audience perspective, I am now really excited about it” (DC Con 2019) anecdote about his thoughts on the final episodes, were actually about Dean potentially ending up with Cas. (Which would totally make sense because Jensen at first didn’t see Dean as anything but hetero, but as of late, he has been throwing in Destiel jokes of his own, so he seems to have warmed up to the idea)

Backed with Misha’s tidbit (DLConline 2020) that he and Jensen had conversations about Destiel, and that they wouldn’t have gone through with it if Jensen wasn’t onboard with it, but Jensen didn’t push back at all. (Why would they need to check with Jensen if it was just Cas going all in?)

Robert Berens (writer of 15x18) also wrote the script at the beginning of Season 15, but made Misha privy to the concept a year prior (Season 14), so they went into this season knowing about Destiel going canon.

This one’s a reach, but this scenario also supposes that Misha was lying about his whereabouts during the filming of the final episode, and him saying that 15x18 was his last episode is part of the diversion to avoid taking away from the weight of Castiel’s death.

And that Supernatural is actually self-aware of its own material (similar to how they have wrapped things up in the past—lots of expository dialogue, poor execution, but fulfills the story arc)

Since Season 15 is basically a Meta Season (Chuck/God as a writer, pretentiously calling out how he created the worlds, its characters, and basically invalidating the past 14 seasons), and 15x19 is supposedly the finale for Season 15, written by two of the worst Supernatural writers, Brad Buckner and Eugenie Ross-Leming (Bob Singer’s wife), then we can assume that 15x19 is where the shitty writers kill themselves--as Chuck, of course.

So we get a badly written episode that produces a bad ending, or as Becky put it, “All action, and no Cas”

So we get the bad writers season ending at 15x19.

And 15x20 is where Sam and Dean write their own stories, and where the cast had a hand in pitching ideas for it.

Dabb has mentioned that 15x20 (Act Two) is a SERIES finale, where they try to resolve the characters’ journeys.

Because as everyone has acknowledged, Supernatural isn’t about the story, it’s about the characters.

So here’s what we can get out of it:

With no more Supernatural beings left to fight, Sam and Dean are in a stalemate. They’ve resigned themselves to fighting to the bitter end, but the “end” has passed, and they’re still standing.

So they try to figure out who they are now, and what they want out of the life they still have.

Sam still wants a normal apple pie life. Before Dean dragged him out of college to go hunting with him, he had a whole life planned out for him. Become a lawyer, settle down with a nice girl, and get a dog. He gave all that up because they had work to do, but now the work is finished, he can finally go back to wanting that for himself again.

Dean finally realizes his self-worth after Cas saves him again. His prayer to Cas in purgatory may have helped him come to terms with his anger, but the whole “you’ve done everything you did for love” speech finally put him in his place, and he learns not to hate himself anymore.

But of course, he cannot fully reconcile with himself if he doesn’t get Cas back, and tell him how he feels.

Because Dean actually wants something for himself this time. Something he knows he can finally have if he can just salvage it.

So maybe this time around, with the help of Jack (off-screen), Dean saves Cas. Grips him tight and raises him from perdition.

They bypass The Empty deal by turning Cas human, and he lives the rest of his days with Dean.

Dean and Cas know they deserve to be saved, and they know that they deserve to be happy.

(Wishful thinking, maybe they kiss a little)

Anyway...

I’m just saying, there’s NO WAY that they’d have Cas go through that whole rushed speech, if they weren’t going to do anything about it later on.

But again, after 10 years of disappointment, I wouldn’t put it past Supernatural to pat themselves on the back and say, “Okay, we sort of gave them what they wanted. We’re good now”

If that’s the case, Supernatural, I’m sorry I wasted my time on you.

Here’s to hoping 🤡

#THE LAST TIME I'LL CLOWN FOR THIS SHOW #SUPERNATURAL #DESTIEL #15x20 #15x19 #15x18 #UNTAGGED #INSIGHTFUL INSIGHTS

[quillquiver]

On SPN, Burying Your Gays, and Being Heard

I am shaking, I feel sick, I feel like I’m insane. And did I run a little wild with the theories? You bet. But you know what didn’t help? The botched clusterfuck that was this entire goddamn finale debacle. How was I supposed to believe anything they said in panels when M&G dialogue would leak saying the exact opposite? How was I supposed to grieve and move on when there was nothing from the cast and crew? Nobody said anything! And any info leaked just destabilized what we already knew or directly contradicted what we’d been told. In light of that, how was I supposed to trust anything anyone said? One rogue translator reciprocated the love confession and I was practically sold, because there were so many questions surrounding the English text that this was something good, something that logically fit, and something I wanted to hold onto. 

Because they hurt me. This is about so much more than one episode or a ship; for years queer fans have seen ourselves in these characters and been told that we were crazy. That we were reading too much into it. I’m not sure how people get upset and offended when a storyline that doesn’t exist... doesn’t exist! said Guy Bee (2013). And then, after all of that, they turned around and said magnanimously, you have your version, I have mine... and that’s okay. But it’s not okay. It’s not okay, because that doesn’t erase what came before - that doesn’t erase the baiting and the gaslighting, and that invalidates everything we felt in the time leading up to that episode. It gave them an open window for all the subtext that came after. It allowed them to brush us off.

And then we got Cas’s love confession. I watched that scene about 500 times. Added to the rest of the season - to the fandom avatar being presented as successful and intelligent, to arc being the death of the author - I felt seen. Really seen, by a show that made it its mission to erase me. I had been okay with Cas dying at first because I had been sure the romance arc would carry through. I had been convinced that after everything, there was no way they would give that to us and then take it away.

But they did, because this is Supernatural. To anyone saying this is not bury your gays, I implore you to read up on the Hays Code. This link is to an amazing queer history podcast and the episode that covers it. In short, the Hays Code was a legal document that came about in 20th Century Hollywood during the puritanical war on the American entertainment industry,  and it stipulated what was not allowed on screen. Not all of it was queer - there’s a whole section about kissing - but what the Code is most remembered for is that queerness was not allowed on screen. But queer people are resilient, and so they started testing the waters... and it turned out that you could in fact code queerness into a narrative, as long as it was subtextual, or as long as the queer character died/was punished, or both. The point is that the character is not allowed to live their truth openly. They are buried, either in the ground or punished in the narrative. The former is normally what we refer to these days, because the latter just doesn’t really happen anymore.

Until Supernatural. 

Castiel is immediately punished for speaking his truth - and please don’t tell me he leveraged that punishment and so he had agency. Literally the only thing that could make him happy was confessing his feelings, and so the Empty deal was directly related to this idea of queerness-as-punishment. That being said, Bobo wrote a beautiful scene. Cas’s confession was a love letter to queerness and coming out... but everything that came after buried him. Castiel may have ended the series alive but he was effectively written out of the last two episodes, and that means that he actually never really got to live his truth. He was silenced by the narrative - that is punishment. 

Dean is a whole other can of worms. Does one rogue translator confirm canon bi!Dean? Or do we have to read our own version of the text? The fact that we even have to ask these questions firmly places us in the realm of queerbaiting. Were the writers trying to get bi!Dean approved but were unable to? I have no idea, but queerbaiting requires proof that the writers encouraged a reading they had no intent of following through on, and we certainly don’t lack in evidence of that. Not from this writers room, but from those of previous eras. Did these writers try? They might have, but the funny thing about queerbaiting discourse is that there has never been a show to bait this long, and I’m making the call that even if you tried at the end, you baited me with half the ship and all the years that came before. 

Of course, the narrative leaves open the possibility of bi!Dean so if you do read the show that way, that means Dean also falls into the bury your gays category; if you read the show this way - which many of us do - the mere suggestion that Dean Winchester was bisexual was enough to punish him. And he was punished. We’ve all written extensively on this, but he was given a random death, on a case his father never finished. All that growth, all that time spent having him accept himself, love himself, that was all taken away. He died the way he always thought he would: as a tool, in service of his father, protecting his brother. He had always believed he’d been a body to throw on the sword and in the end that’s all he was. And when he gets to Heaven? He’s also silenced. He barely speaks in the episode except to monologue during his death, and that is 100% Sam-centric. He is scared. 

It was horrific to watch. I sobbed so hard my roommate was seriously concerned. 

I had been fully prepared for Supernatural to end disappointingly. I had figured everything would end with a huge heaven reunion because white, straight, cis-male S&F writers love the idea of death as a reward, but instead of being disappointed I felt like I had witnessed a slaughter. Every single one of the queer themes intrinsic to the show: found family, resilience, speaking your truth... were gone. And I know we’ve talked about this too, but it bears repeating, because in doing this, in writing the queerness out of its narrative, Supernatural effectively looked every one of us queer folx in the eye and said: you are not important. You don’t matter. All of that stuff that came before is all good and well, but what really matters at the end of all things is blood family. It’s two brothers in a car. Life sucks but at least we get to die and go to paradise - real paradise, that your angel buddy died for and then made for you and who we never hear from again.

I felt insane. I felt cheated. I felt humiliated. I felt devastated. I still feel all those things, but listen to me. You have been heard. Not by Misha Collins, who is a great guy, but doesn’t get it. Not by Jensen Ackles, who is a similarly great guy, but also just doesn’t understand. And not by anyone else who worked on this show. 

You know who heard you? Me. The people who follow me. The people who follow you. We saw each other, and heard each other, and we gave each other a leg up. We made memes. We wrote fic. We drew fanart. We made gifs. All for ourselves and all for each other. We broke Tumblr multiple times. We donated over $60,000 USD to multiple different causes. We got multiple hashtags trending at multiple different points, and today kept it up because we demanded answers and then we got them. There were at least 5 articles written about the show today. We made that happen. We made people listen. 

Supernatural didn’t deserve me, and it didn’t deserve you. It didn’t deserve Dean. It didn’t deserve Cas. It didn’t deserve Misha and Jensen. But this show ended with a bleak, awful message and we turned around and showed them that love is loud. So what about all of this is real?

We are.

#alex talks #spngate #archived #this was very therapeutic #and i honestly don't know if i will ever be able to love something like this again #because i have been burned oh man #but this fandom is amazing #and i am proud to be a part of it #and i am not going anywhere #journaling #15x18 #15x19 #15x20 #castiel #dean winchester #destiel

[gyuwrites]

TASTE LIKE CANDY

pairing : yang jungwon x gn!reader

genre : slight angst if you squint in the beginning, fluffiest fluff, college!au, playground date

warnings : pecks/kissess (small), food (?) [let me know if there's more]

rating : sfw

summary : you and jungwon are here to mend your lost relationship and a playground date is always the go-to thing for the both of you.

w.c : 1.6k

A.N : this is a very late christmas special. this is a part of @kflixnet 's dialogue prompt event! also a suprise post!! enjoy~

the prompt used was fluff prompt 8: "i bet if i kissed you right now, your lips would taste like candy"

song to listen while reading : CANDY - TWICE

fic is below the cut!

college has been an ass to the both of you, more assignments were shoved to your hands and jungwon's and it was hard to keep everything up whilst maintain a good relationship.

you and jungwon met at highschool and since then, your relationship with him started. you both even got into the same college however chose a different course which you thought was fine. now, you don't think it was. you barely met him because you weren't in the same building as him. the worse part? assignments.

sometimes you wonder if this relationship is going to continue or not. it felt like a wall had stood in-between your relationship and you were drifting apart. every time either of you try to text one another, one would be too tired to do anything or still have assignments to finish

you were on your bed, lying down. you weren't thinking about your assignments or how tired you are, you were thinking about your relationship with jungwon. you missed him but you knew you couldn't do anything. suddenly, a 'ding' could be heard and it snapped you back from your train of thoughts. you grabbed your phone and to your suprise, it was jungwon.

jungwonie

─ how are you :D ?

you

─ I'm doing alright

jungwonie

─ what do you think about a playground date like how we did to get away from class back in highschool '>' ?

you and jungwon really liked going to the playground for a date. it was your go-to date place and a comfort place for you. playgrounds at night are often really quiet, so maybe that's how you ended up loving it a lot. some times you could sit there all day and have random chats together, getting away from everything for the moment, it felt nice to be able to let everything out

you

─ sure, been ready for those. I'll just grab my jacket. usual place ?

jungwonie

─ usual place <3

you got up from your bed, excited because it has been ages since you went there, especially with jungwon. let's not forget you never had time to even go on a date with him. you changed to a thicker outfit and grabbed your winter jacket and left the dorm. you were thinking of ways to sneak out without getting caught. the boy's dorm was on the other side so you had to get out alone.

you noticed a very familiar figure from afar. it was jungwon and he was outside the gates. you noticed him pointing to the gate and did some actions with his fingers that looked like he jumped over the gate. you quietly walked up to the gate and looked to your right where the security guard was. you noticed him sleeping and you sighed out of relief.

"i'll catch you." jungwon quietly spoke to you in a soft manner. you climbed up on the gate, positioning yourself so that jungwon could catch you easily without getting hurt. you jumped down and just like he said, he caught you. you missed this, being in his embrace and all.

"love, i miss this too but we might freeze to death if we continue standing like this." you laughed at his comment and removed your arms around him. he interwined his fingers with yours and put it in his pocket for warmth.

"let's go to the convenient store, it's still open at this hour." he said. you agreed and started walking hand in hand with jungwon. you certainly bought a lot of snacks because there was two bags needed to carry everything you purchased. you and jungwon started arguing in front of the cashier about who should be paying.

"let me pay this. it's been awhile since i bought you anything."

"no, i'm paying. more than half of this inside both bags are mine, and i am independent enough to do so." you agrued back. jungwon always pays for all the things whenever you guys are on a date. rich privilege yk. you always told him that you could pay but he never listens and sometimes even secretly pay first without you knowing.

it was nice to have a boyfriend who likes to pamper you with love and small things but you couldn't just let him waste his money just because you wanted something, not needed something. you couldn't help but feel guilt growing inside you the more he uses his money to buy gifts for you or treat you during your dates.

"you always pay all the stuffs i want to buy, just let me buy them for once."

"okay, fine. you can pay. only this time." jungwon said as he puts back his wallet into his pocket. you paid for everything and left, munching to your favourite snacks while walking. you both reached there in a matter of minutes, it wasn't that far from your college which you both were glad about.

1am flashes to your eyes when u switched on your phone. you honestly wondered what time would you be going back to your dorms but that wasn't important at the moment. what matters most is that you both are back at your favourite playground and you are together at the moment.

you both sat on the swings and lightly swung yourselves forward and backwards. you exhaled and watched it disolve into thin air, slightly shivering from how cold winter gets at night. winter was not your friend at all, you always catch a cold from it. no matter how warmly you dressed, none of it did you any justice.

"cold?"

"yeah" you nodded and looked beside you where jungwon was, then noticed he was taking off his hoodie. "aren't you cold?" you asked, worried that he was cold but still decided to give you his hoodie.

"no, i still have my winter coat, don't worry." he reassured as he handed you his hoodie and turns out, he had a sweater under his hoodie. he wored back his winter coat and looked at nothing in particular. you put on his hoodie and continued eating the snacks.

you rumbled inside the bags to find something to snack on and you found some lolipops. you removed the lolipop wrapper and popped it into your mouth. you knew today wasn't a day you'd have a lot of fun with jungwon, today is more of a 'no talking, just two figures keeping eachother warmth' kind of day. no one there to bother you about assigments, absolutely nothing, just the two of you, together.

"what kind of flavor is the candy?" jungwon suddenly asked. did he wanted to try or just pure curiosity. good thing there's more than one if he wanted one. "oh it's grape flavored" you replied, happily licking your favourite flavor.

"well, i bet if i kissed you right now, your lips would taste like candy" he said while looking everywhere but you. you stopped licking your candy, blushing as you looked at him. he suddenly laughed, "i'm kidding but if you want it, i wouldn't mind giving it to you."

"gosh, go away." you said as you looked away, all shy. jungwon likes to tease you like this because you always give him the cutest reaction in his eyes. "it's getting late, let's go. we have classes tomorrow." you said, obviously still blushing, partly from the cold winter night as you checked your phone.

2am...we were here for an hour, just with eachother's presence, i like it.

you stood up, extended your hand to jungwon for him to hold while not looking at him because you were busy with your phone. you felt his warm hands on yours and he pulled you to him with no hesitations. "let's stay this for awhile." he uttered as he embraced you into a warm hug. you hugged back, of course. you would be lying if you said his hugs weren't comfortable and warm. in fact, his hugs were the best.

"we need to go back to our dorms." you said in a muffled voice. sure, your surroundings were certainly cold and freezing but his warmth always makes up to it. you removed yourself from his embrace as you walked back to the building together.

"let's do it again, next time."

"maybe not this late? because it's going to be tiring the next day." you weren't exactly a morning person. while, it was hard for you to wake up on time, you were never late for any of your classes which was great. it's great to have an annoying roommate to help you out on that.

"before anything, can we kiss?, we haven't kissed for ages, fyi." he asked for your consent, in case you didn't want to kiss, he won't push it. "less talking, more action." you said as you leaned in closer to his face, waiting for him to close the gap. jungwon smiled and closed the gap, kissing you gently. you missed his tender kisses. you broke apart and wave at him as a goodbye and a goodnight.

"see you around campus, i'm talking as if i'm in the same building as you." you laughed, bidding him goodbye and a quick peck on his lips before sneaking back to the dorm.

maybe your relationship doesn't have to come to an end afterall.

#kflixnet #enhypen #enhypen jungwon #enhypen yang jungwon #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen fanfiction #yang jungwon #jungwon imagines #enhypen fluff #jungwon scenarios #gyu-works

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

ahdflksjaklf;jsls ok buddies - I hate talking about 14x13: Lebanon, but it has relevancy in the “John Winchester is a villain and cannot and should not be redeemed” discourse as well as being a crucial piece of finale denialist lore so I Have Been Thinking About It Too Much.

As you may recall, the Occult Object of the Week - the pearl - in Lebanon is supposed to grant Dean’s “heart’s desire.” Dean and Sam are Very Sure this means expelling Michael (the Dean Winchester Must Be Saved installment of season 14) (honestly that premise always seemed a little slim to me, I was hoping for Dean’s heart’s desire to be Cas, on Dean’s car, naked, covered in bees). 

Instead they summon Dad of the Year, which at first feels infuriating.  However after discussion with my earworms, I Have Fixed It (and also turned it into a grenade to launch at 15x20.)

Finale denialists and John Winchester derogatorians ASSEMBLE! and let’s discuss after the cut.

I’ve written in depth about Dean’s struggles with the cycle of abuse, so I won’t go too far into it here, but if you want to revisit any of that meta this is a good place to begin.  This post hinges on the same theory - that Dean’s true freedom is established in his release from that cycle - that is the logical outcome of any hero’s journey for him, and where he would finally be able to accept happiness and love.  This logically would also make release from the cycle of abuse and the feelings of self-hatred Dean struggles with his “heart’s desire” for purposes of the pearl.  When it comes to emotions, we also know Dean doesn’t deal with them well.  He punches things instead.  So odds are, Dean hasn’t really worked through these feelings.  

Dean also mentions when John returns that “it was what [Dean] wanted since he was 4″ - when they lost Mary, right before John became obsessed with revenge.  Season 12 Mary canonically remembers John as a “good dad,” so we can draw a line from that to the abuse really starting shortly after her death.  This is also corroborated by Dean himself:

DEAN: You know when you died, it changed Dad. 

(A visual of the John Mary remembers) (just my excuse to put pictures of Matt Cohen on your dash) (I shouldn’t need an excuse) (Matt Cohen hi you are on Tumblr please don’t read any of this I’m embarrassed).

So what Dean has is pre-Mary’s-death John and post-Mary’s-death John, post-Mary’s-death John being the one whose abuse created Dean’s own damaged persona.  Dean thinks the fix is to stop things on the front end (he is ignoring any process-centered solution, he just wants it to never have happened, he is in denial that he has to work through this and just wants it to be erased, etc etc etc).  

***also keep in mind that going back in time to change things on the front end as a “fix it” is a storyline SPN repeats regularly***

***and it always ends up being impossible to do*** 

Ok so for Dean, his damage/anger/brutal nature/darkness is always linked to John, and this cycle “began” for Dean once their family was torn apart by Mary’s death.  So the fix is his “blood family” together.  That’s his heart’s desire in Lebanon because Dean hasn’t really worked through any of his emotions, and it’s his very Dean way of fixing it - “oh if my family gets put back together I will be put back together too.”

***speaking of quick fixes, I’d like to note that any case in SPN that is referred to as a “milk run”  inevitably becomes complicated and messy***

***continuing the thematics of there’s no such thing as a quick fix***

This is no different.  Stopping the cycle by simply erasing it from the narrative erases anything else that happened along the way during the journey.  It erases this Mary (who they know as a person by this point and not just the mom on a pedestal) 

and (most importantly) it erases this Cas (the episode specifically replaces Cas with one who Doesn’t Know Dean).

We Emphasize This Of Course In The Dialogue In Case You Missed It

DEAN Cas, you know us. ALTERNATE CAS I don’t know you.

***Simply erasing the origin of Dean’s trauma erases all of Dean’s growth.  It erases this family that Dean is so proud to tell John he has now. It erases everything he has already overcome despite how hard it was to achieve it.

So, John goes back.  In that way, the pearl does give Dean his heart’s desire - his realization that this is not about a quick fix, it is about the journey to the good, and all you gain and become along the way (kind of similar to “Happiness isn't in the having. It's in just being. It's in just saying it" eh?).  it’s the process.  It’s every moment along the way.  It’s the people who help him get there.

And then he starts the healing journey by taking control of his own life, by owning his feelings instead of displacing the blame, by recognizing he is NOT guided solely by the actions of his father and this cycle:

DEAN

And for the longest time, I blamed Dad. I mean, hell, I blamed Mom, too, you know? I was angry. But say we could send Dad back knowing everything. Why stop there? Why not send him even further back and let some other poor sons of bitches save the world? But here’s the problem. Who does that make us? Would we be better off? Well, maybe. But I gotta be honest – I don’t know who that Dean Winchester is.

And the episode fucking ends with Cas, the Cas Who Knows Them coming into the bunker and asking them what happened, calling each of them by name just to emphasize again That He Knows Them, because Cas knowing Dean, and Cas being Dean’s family is the cornerstone of what Dean’s heart desires.

[CAS walks in from the door at the top of the stairs. SAM, DEAN and MARY walk out from the library to see him.]

CAS Mary, Sam, Dean. What happened?

So yeah, it took 14 damn seasons but Lebanon is where Dean realizes he can be defined by more than the acts of his father.  (That’s why it’s so terrifying for Dean when Chuck snatches back any control he gained in Season 15.  Because for Dean, Chuck is just John Winchester Controls My Every Action all over again, except he’s God which makes it even worse.) 

That’s also why the final blow to Chuck is not Dean killing him. 

The last stage in the journey that begins here with Dean’s “I’m good with who I am” - [I’m still bad and dark and damaged but I’m good with it]

is Dean’s “that’s not who I am.” [the most caring man on Earth; the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know]

Thats equally why 15x18 is so brilliant, 15x19 is at least acceptable, and 15x20 simply does. not. work.

Dean Winchester’s perfect heaven cannot possibly center on the blood family.  It does not have John Winchester and Mary, husband and wife, who took away his own free will.  It is THIS FAMILY.  The found family.  Cas and Jack and Sam and the Mary that was resurrected.  Dean’s entire character arc supports this journey, and to have it culminate in something that is so established in the season prior to this one as something Dean knows he no longer wants is maddening.

I’m even more mad now because I just remembered that the most prominent picture above Dying Sam’s bed was the blood family portrait from this episode; almost like they wanted us to remember this particular stupid lesson.  This show is so stupid when it could have been so so so very good.

***I want to say thanks again to all of you who read my spiraling if you got this far.  It’s therapeutic for me to do it, but it makes it all the better that people actually read it.  Seeing you in my notes MAKES my entire day****

#seriously im feral again #spn #spn meta #Lebanon #John Winchester is a trash heap #spn 14x13 #destiel #found family #spn fandom #spn family #Dean Winchester analysis #somebody help me im spiraling back into finale denialist rage #deancas #found family forever #supernatural is a show #but it is also a way of life #just my daily therapy of psychoanalyzing Dean Winchester #somebody come get me I have officially entirely gone mad #15x20 sucks and this is why #destiel hivemind Meet the Parents #myspnmeta

[mean-scarlet-deceiver]

For the episode thing: 'A Scarf For Percy'

A very good piece of work. Simply put, they took a story everyone* hates and turned it into an episode everyone* enjoys.

“Everyone,” of course, asterisked as an exaggeration. But as far as I’ve seen, these are the commonest opinions.

In particular, I have seen a lot of people bemoan the original RWS “Scarf,” both for its weird placement in the middle of Henry’s book and because it feels ‘too short and rushed.’

But I don’t hold with that, myself. I like how both Awdrys will mix up the theme of their books a bit one slightly “off-brand” story… and I actually kinda dig the austerity of the original ending, which goes like this:

Oof!

“No, go about your work for the rest of the day dirty and wearing a dunce cap.” FC1, you savage.

That said, Britt and David did some adaptational magic with this one! All the Thomas and Percy dialogue is non-Awdry, yet it’s really good (a theme during this era: I also thoroughly enjoy the non-Awdry bits in “Saved from Scrap,” “Toby’s Tightrope,” “Rusty to the Rescue,” “Escape,” and even, yes, “Tender Engines”—calm the eff down about what they cut out for one damn moment and just consider that Diesel/Gordon interaction on its own merits—it’s well done!)

They also serve up the only mention of Henry and James interaction outside of Christopher Awdry’s canon and it’s right on-point; they are chummy! (I like how they clash in the CA books too, but in between those clashes, surely they spend most of their time acting like this.)

Another change to the script is in playing up that all this baggage was for a “special train.” No need to cringe because this was long before TVS made “special” a dirty word. That TFC is planning a clothes change before a photoshoot really heightens the stakes when Percy comes crashing through like a dumbass (they said, affectionately). Also, the mention that Henry “was looking forward to pulling the special train”—can you believe that wasn’t actually from Henry the Green Engine? Where it would have been great at placing this story squarely after Henry’s successful rebuild??

Of course, beyond the script, the actual production is typically good work too. Lookit this opening set! Very few better "snow scenes" in the whole series than this one:

The coziness of that barrel fire! (Hilarious that all these people are here but they have to wait on the firelighter, though. Ah well.)

The glimpse into Hatt Hall here is a welcome change of pace. And, speaking of pace, no better way to build up a simple story than by having a character make and explain a good plan—that will never come to fruition! This is Fiction Writing 101 but certain later seasons, not to mention Christopher Awdry, never got this memo.

The “wreck” is awfully silly, but that’s fine because it’s a silly low-stakes incident. The literal jam on the Fat Controller model (even staining the eye!) always sent me into gigglefits as a kid:

On the other hand, I always felt terrible with the close-ups on poor silly Percy. *clutches stuffed Percy into tight hug*

More atmospheric shots. Lovely sets; that and the pace/tone make this a strong season opener. <3

Now, do I think the made a grave mistake, trying to re-create the “Thomas and Percy” bookends in this season, the way they did in Season 2? Yup. They shoulda changed it up.

Season 1 had the Thomas and Gordon dynamic bracketing the whole thing with a notable Henry focus throughout, Season 2 had Thomas and Percy (and Toby, I guess) dynamic bookending the beginning and end with a notable Edward focus throughout, and Season 3 to be fair did a strong Duck motif BUT we would be living in a richer T&F universe if they’d also had the gumption to move on to a different “framing device.” Thomas and James, Thomas and Daisy, Thomas and Anyone, hell if they’d really had balls they could have done a season where the bookends were the relationship between two characters who weren’t Thomas (!) i’m thinking Gordon and James, since this was also a big season for their dynamic… but.

Alas.

Yeah, I suppose given their protagonist-centered show they needed to have Thomas in there, but also insisting that his duologist would forever be Percy… ugh. Woe. The seeds of the show’s babyfication and formulaic-ness are right. here.

However, in the close-up view, taking the episode as a self-contained whole, it’s a fine effort. Lots of adaptational changes, most of them superbly done.

#i hit the image limit so couldn't show it #but one flaw is that the lighting is a little off/drab in parts of this one #strange in S3 when the rest of it is notable for its crispness and colour #also yes the immortal 'you've only got a small one!' IS an awdry original ;) #i know someone's wondering #dm me if you want the google drive y'all #i think this is one of the books on there... #ttte episode talk #ttte season 3 #a scarf for percy #chatter #ttte percy #the fat controller #ttte henry #HAVE I MENTIONED HOW ACTUALLY GREAT THOM AND PERCY'S LINES THEY WROTE FOR THE BEGINNING ARE #that percy is pluckily trying to make the best of it while thomas has his cynical 'and firelighters' asdfgfhgfhkgjljlh #superb #wonderfully on-point for both #(for a damn change) #ttte #this is ttte #thomas the tank engine #the railway series #ahhhh fork i forgot the most obvious thing though #angelis REALLY hadn't found his rhythm yet #bit awkward that #still if they had edited his odd pacing in post-production it would be unremarkable but fine!

[sortasirius]

what makes you think the writers want deancas? not trying to be an asshole, i'm just genuinely curious as to why you think that. i know berens' episodes are pretty heavy with subtext so i can see why you'd say that he wants it, but i'm not so sure about the rest of the writers/dabb. it seems like meghan isn't a huge fan either, given her "they twisted it so fast" tweet :/ of course she's a very new writer (think she's only writing one ep this season?) but still

OKAY this is a great question, welcome to my dissertation.

I’m going to address the end of your question first. Meghan is actually DeanCas positive, she has been for quite a long time. She actually, a few years back, posted a picture of her reading a literal book about Destiel and captioned it “writing reading” or something like that.

This whole thing just comes out of a boiling over of tensions because of how nasty fandom twitter can be. Like I said here, I think this has just gotten blown out of proportion, they shouldn’t have posted all this randomly disparaging stuff, but also like...can you blame them? The fandom is a lot, we always have been, and they’re probably also under a gag order not to talk about the finale, and are annoyed that people keep asking.

So nah, Meg is not anti Destiel.

To the first part!! So let’s take a look at the show runners since Cas has been around.

Seasons 4 and 5: Kripke

Seasons 6 and 7: Gamble

Seasons 8-11ish: Carver

Seasons 11ish-15: Dabb

So starting with Kripke. Okay, yes, I will be the first to admit that we have some pretty incredible Destiel moments in these seasons, but it’s less directly written into the plot and much more from Misha and Jensen’s uhhhh ~chemistry~. The only times it was directly written into the script was when the episode was handled by someone like Edlund (“On The Head Of A Pin,” “The End,” “My Bloody Valentine”). And you have to remember, if in season 5, there are moments here and there where you’re like huh that’s suspiciously romantic dialogue, remember that Cas took Anna’s place. Anna was supposed to be endgame for Dean, but due to a myriad of issues and Misha’s general greatness, Anna was replaced with Cas.

Onto 6 and 7. Hmmm. Gamble. 6 and 7 are my two least favorite seasons and that’s no secret, and that’s not only due to the plain old weird shit in the overall storyline, but also that homegirl killed off Cas in s7 and then Bobby like four episodes later. (Also it ALWAYS rubbed me the wrong way they couldn’t have Baby in that season lol). We still had some great DeanCas moments, but again, it wasn’t really written into the overall arc (until they had to change the end of season 7 because of tanking ratings and bring Misha back lol, anyone remember the fact that Dean kept Cas’ jacket and would randomly dream of him? Yeah.). But we still had those moments, those distinctly romantic moments, probably the best example in these two seasons is from Edlund again, specifically “The Man Who Would be King,” I wrote a little about that here.

We move onto Carver, who gave us, at this point, the most overt DeanCas season with season 8 (season gr8 is a better name imo), and this is the first time Dean and Cas’ relationship is directly written as an arc of the season.  I mean, you have everything in Purgatory, Dean “seeing” Cas everywhere, the fact that he felt so guilty that Cas stayed in Purgatory that he manipulated his own memories to think that he was the one that failed Cas, because he couldn’t comprehend that Cas would want to leave him, and let’s not forget Dean snapping Cas out of Naomi’s hold on him in “Goodbye Stranger.”  It was a very obvious shift, not enough to alert the general audience, but more than enough for most of us in fandom.

It’s also important to note that this is when Andrew stopped co writing with Loflin and started writing his own episodes (”Hunter Heroici” anyone?)  I like Loflin fine, but Dabb was able to stretch his legs a little bit more once he stopped co-writing, and we also began to see some DeanCas themes in his solo episodes.

In any case, them and their issues being a big part of the seasons continued with Carver, and Berens entered the scene, his first episode (”Heaven Can’t Wait”) is one of my favorites, with human Cas and the fanfiction gap and Dean and Cas just generally being awkward and funny and sweet.  This is Bobo’s FIRST episode, remember that.  He comes right out of the gate with it.

Also in Season 9, this is when Dean takes the Mark of Cain, and the Cas/Colette mirror is born, so obviously, Dean and Cas are the fabric of the season once again.  This is also the season where Metatron says Cas is “in love with humanity,” and then immediately refers to Dean as Humanity so uhhhh yeah.

Onto season 10, Dabb and Berens continue with their greatness (I could write pages on the DeanCas date in “The Things We Left Behind” alone).  And then we have one of the best scenes in the entire show in “The Prisoner” where the Cas/Colette mirror continues and Dean, driven by grief and pain and rage and the Mark, still doesn’t kill Cas.  He still can’t kill Cas.

Season 11 is important because it takes choice away from both Cas and Dean, and shows us, as the audience, how much losing each other takes out of them. We saw in season 10 how much losing Dean takes from Cas, but what about Cas losing Dean?  Dean loses his choice with his connection to Amara this season, and loses even more when Lucifer reveals he’s been possessing Cas, and plays on Dean’s connection to Cas like a mockery.  It’s also worth noting that, similarly to season 8, Dean breaks out of the connection with Amara when he’s worried about Cas, and that’s something that even SHE is surprised by.

But then season 12, the beginning to the Renaissance.  This is when we get the writer’s that become important for what Dean and Cas are today, and, truly, why I believe they want canon Destiel as much as we do.

This is the first season with Dabb’s writers: Davy Perez, Meredith Glynn, Steve Yockey, and of course Bobo all come in with their incredible talents and gave us episode after episode of good content.  “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” is probably my favorite, probably the best example of what I’m saying.  An episode where Dean is called out by an enemy directly, told to “roll the dice” on Cas’ life.  And Dean won’t, it’s not even really a hesitation.  And this comes from a character that has known Dean for ten seconds.  I also wrote more in depth about this episode here.  There are also some.....distinctly domestic details we get this season, specifically in “The Future” (written by Berens and Glynn) with the mixtape.  The most tropey of tropes mixtape.  Yeah, I’ll just leave that one here.

And then season 12 ends with Cas’ death, but also with the parallel between Sam and Dean with Jess and Cas.  Sam literally has to drag Dean away from Cas, just like Dean had to drag Sam out of his burning apartment in the pilot.  The episode drives it home in every way that it can: Dean is the one left kneeling by Cas’ body, while Sam goes to find out what is upstairs.  Dean is the one who stares at the sky, finally broken.  This isn’t a random thing, this is Dean’s whole arc, it’s the entirety of the beginning of 13.  Dean’s pain, his anguish, his anger.

Season 13 starts with them burning Cas, with Dean, who has begged God to bring him back, who has split his knuckles punching a door, standing, staring at Cas’ pyre with brokenness on his face.

I mean.....

Anyway, season 13 is where it gets interesting (well, I think all of this is interesting but I’m a writer nerd so).  So Cas comes back from the Empty in “Advanced Thanatology” written by Steve Yockey, and then a wombo combo of “Tombstone” by Davy Perez next (”Brokebacknatural” as the PR said at the time).  Listen.  This is the part that SPN crossed a line that they couldn’t come back from.  With Cas being Dean’s “big win,” the fact that Dean and Cas watch movies together, “I told you, he’s an angry sleeper.  Like a bear.” Talked about it here.

This is where, in my opinion, the network stepped in, but the damage was already done.  They had already established that Cas was Dean’s big win, that Dean’s poor coping was not due to Mary’s disappearance, but solely due to Cas, and that Dean and Cas have more married energy than anyone else.  The network had nixed blatant canon at this point, and they writing room had been pushing the boundaries of what the network would allow. 

After these episodes, we see a marked drop off of DeanCas heavy scenes.  They’re still there, still a part of the fabric of the season, but not as...obvious as it had been in early season 13.

And this continued through season 14, we’re back to scraps of Destiel scenes here and there, but to me it always felt like there was something bubbling under the surface, something distinctly unsaid in the themes of the season, even after the walk back of obvious “Dean and Cas are in love” scenes.

And then we get to season 15, which, y’all know I talk about all the time.  What’s important here is that Bobo and Glynn are both executive producers, calling more of the shots than ever before.  Additionally, it’s important to note that, though they only co write occasionally, Glynn and Berens refer to each other as “work husband” and “work wife.”  Each episode has just turned up the volume, and, not for the first time, but certainly the most obvious, Dean and Cas ARE the season.  Sure, they’re trying to beat God, they’re trying to finally find peace, defeat the final big bad, but really?  This season has been about Dean, and Dean’s relationship to Cas.

And not only do we have obvious and clear Destiel in nearly every episode, but we have episodes like “Last Call” which canonize bi!Dean (wrote about that here).

And, maybe most importantly so far, we have “The Rupture,” the breakup, and “The Trap,” Dean’s confession (both written by Berens).  And here’s the thing.  These episodes feel connected, but also feel like they’re missing something.  Beren’s last episode is 15x18, “The Truth.”  We’ve all spec’ed about what could happen in this episode, and I think *I* know what it’s leading to.  But for it to be leading to that, it means that the network has to have approved what we’ve all been waiting for years for.

Who got this change to happen?  Who got the network to change their minds?  It wasn’t us.  It was them.  I am fully convinced that Dabb and Berens quite literally put their careers on the line for Dean and Cas.  They believe in them, they’ve shown that from the beginning, but the only thing standing in the way was the network, never allowing them to take the final step. 

So, to answer your question: I think the writers want canon DeanCas because they’ve already shown us that they do.  Take a look at their episodes, at Dabb’s, at Beren’s, at Glynn’s, at Perez’s, at Yockey’s.  They’ve been telling us what’s going on with Dean and Cas for years.

Sure, I’m not in their heads, I guess I don’t know for *sure* that this has been their thought process, but if we put it all together, from the marked shift when Dabb fully took over in s12, to the change right after “Tombstone,” to the new shift, the blatantly romantic shift in season 15, what else is there?

I’ve said for a long time that we, the SPN fandom, are beyond lucky to have the writer’s that we do.  They’re all going to go on to have prolific careers and we were lucky to get them at the end of our little show.  I give them a lot of credit for what we have in the show today.

Just remember, they’ve been telling us in all of s15 who Chuck is.  He says he’s the writer, right?  But a writer who doesn’t have control of his characters?  A writer who wants to do the same ending over and over because it “works”?  That doesn’t sound like a writer, it sounds like a network exec.

They’ve been showing us what they want for years, and the way s15 is going?  I think they may have convinced the network to let us have it.

#supernatural #destiel #spn #my writing #anyway yeah i love these writers #welcome to my essay lmao #spn writers #anonymous #lilly answers

[jockpoetry]

supernatural sees women as a tool for development and strengthening of narratives/motivation and dean sees his body as a tool. is that anything?

When I saw this ask I really made the 🥴in real life. So, yeah anon, I do think there’s something to this.

Quick Disclaimer before I actually launch into my thoughts™: A lot of my read of Dean stems from my experience as both an oldest daughter and a transman. Being the oldest daughter was an experience I lived for many years, but I am also a man. I wasn’t raised as a man, I wasn’t socialized as a man, and even though once I came out upon reflection my masculinity was obviously there. Like I was a man™ before I knew I was a man. Even when I actively tied my identity to femininity for a long time! A lot of my prideful moments were based around statements like: “I was the only girl who (fill in the blank).” 

So I am just putting that out there before I launch into my spiel about Dean/Gender/Tool because they all interlock for me. 

I am also going to apologize in advance because I know this has fully gone off the rails and I’m not even done writing it yet. If this is incomprehensible ! Well, happens to the best of us.

First off, most importantly I guess before we discuss womanhood and Dean and the way both are utilized on the show I need to say that I personally don’t subscribe the whole Dean is female coded thing. 

It’s a read I can absolutely understand. But for me..he’s not. 

He’s a hypermasculine man to the point that when (and because he is written as a punchline, as the stupid™ brother, as the whore™, as the mother/father™, as daddy’s blunt instrument™, etc) Dean deviates from the pre-accepted definition of hypermasculine it’s Wrong. 

It’s Instantly Feminine. 

I think the internet has made the world very black and white, or blue and pink maybe. This point, I think, colors a lot of these discussions. Dean cooks, he cleans and so therefor he’s female coded. When that really just feeds back into the whole toxic masculinity loop. You can’t be masculine and cook and clean and cry. That’s for feminine people only. 

I get the argument! I do, I just think that Dean’s actions are not inherently feminine, it’s just in the vacuum of Female and in the Absence of Traditional Masculinity it makes sense to assign him female coded and move on.

IN FACT the way that Dean is the action hero of the show, the Masculine™ one on the show - but he cries, and he rages, and he cooks (Again and Again) and cleans (Again and Again). The fact he’s macho and confident but he has so little self esteem. Is frankly insane to me. You have this blaze of glory character who is so depressed that they have him kill himself. Twice. In explicitly “I hate myself, I hate hearing all the things I hate about myself, I want to destroy myself” ways. 

On just a regular ol’ network show that is just ungodly bad at times. They let their Male Hero cry - all the time (if I linked every example of this the essay would be...longer than it already is, but just take my word for it). Dean tears up and grieves and shows more than just Angry Horny Violent™ (he shows plenty of that, don’t get me wrong) but he’s Emotional (Again and Again and Again). In many different ways!

I mean, beyond even just tearing up, they make their Male Hero™ face sexual violence in pretty, uniquely horrifying - and queer! - ways.

Let’s make it clear, they did a lot of this unintentionally. 

Or they do it as a joke. 

Off of dean for a moment to say women are plot devices in this show. I could probably count on one hand female characters who have sincere depth to them that have roles outside of progressing plot, filling a filler episode, and who are still alive. Like even characters such as Charlie who are wholly developed, and interesting, are only remembered/mentioned/utilized to progress plots or fill an episode out - and then she dies. For pain™ for plot™ for no other reason than to traumatize a character. 

Which let’s also make it clear Dean’s trauma is also only used as a plot device (as is Sam’s but in a different way, and Cas’ trauma is a whole other barrel of fish we’re not gonna dive into right now). Like wholesale full stop they don’t actually care about what happened to him. Unless it’s relevant in an episode. 

Oh that boys home he was left at when he was 16 for months? Sure we’ll sprinkle that in in the back half of the series. Oh he was covered in bruises and said it was from a hunt (when it’s clear contextually they were from his father but saying the fantastical but true is easier than saying the uncomfortable but true). As Dean says though the story became the story, he was sixteen. He just went along with what John said.

We only see Dean ever truly rage at John, by the way, when either Dean is dead (when he’s between life and death and he rages at John, right before John “apologizes” for traumatizing him, for putting too much on Dean’s shoulders, and fucking dying) or John is dead (the Djinn episode where Dean is straight™ and John is dead™ and he goes to his grave and just yells and rages like he should have to his father in the real world).

Dean’s trauma from being both tortured and torturer in hell? Yeah, we don’t talk about that after it’s Relevant™. Even though it’s clear - especially in the demon!dean, mark of cain era, all those years later - Alastair still has his hooks inside of Dean. I stopped watching originally after s8 ended. I was fed up with the show, and with this whole renaissance I’ve been doing a rewatch and I’m into season twelve now and it really has never come up again. 

Even when he had the mark of cain and he was tasked with questioning and accused of torturing it was “the mark has changed you” and not “you were victim and victimizer in hell for forty years, which is longer than you’ve been alive on earth” (and, was about as long as he wound up living. Which is desperately sad.

Because we talk about Sam’s desire for a “normal” life but, Dean wanted out too. He was tired in the first few seasons of this show, he never had a chance to taste freedom (we don’t count the boys home, because that was a different kind of regimented life, and it was a false freedom) the way that Sam did in Flagstaff with Bones or at Stanford with Jessica. Love for Dean is sacrificing, it’s putting himself/his happiness/his well-being last.

Because Dean only knows love in the context of violence (like all of these fun examples, for starters) is a phrase that I’ve said a lot both in private chats and on here, and I absolutely think it goes to him being a tool (a blunt instrument, a plot device, so both textually and metatextually) instead of a person. Which Cas sees Dean’s shame/guilt and sees that side of Dean because he touched his soul, and saw more than just the Righteous™ man, more than just the tool, he saw A good man, not a machine. 

On the other side though you have how “bad guys” view Dean: Desperate, Sloppy, Needy, Dean’s hole (Again), which is again so wildly counterintuitive to the story of a Macho Man Hero™. You’re using vocabulary that is both queering him and feminizing (and I know this a meme format, but sincerely it is done in a derogatory way it is feminizing. It’s breaking him down to bare parts, to a sloppy hole). 

My whole rewatch I have been absolutely fascinated by how identity and free will is utilized/conceptualized on this show. Castiel has been my main focus, but Dean and how he is framed by himself and others is...fascinating - and frustrating. The writers inconsistency lends itself not only to this unintentionally queer character, but also one that again is incredibly easily read as a non-traditionally masculine character.

As a feminine character.

This show has so few female characters that of course it had to foist the roles/behaviors/plots that a female character might have onto a male character. Which I think is part of why reading Dean as trans (either transmasc, or transfemme) is so easily done like.   

Half of these are shit posts, but you can find trans allegories/textual evidence in this show again, again, again, again, and again. And this is unintentional, they don’t want you to look at Dean and see woman, former future or present. Like a lot of these I’m sure are punchlines for them, because women/queer folk are punchlines to them. 

Sometimes the only women in an episode are random witnesses who get two sentences of dialogue, and then the main guest character is a man. Who flirts with Dean, and Dean is receptive to it. 

They paint themselves into a corner, there are female Rabbi. So easily could Aaron have been a woman instead of a man, but they made the choice to play up the HaHa Dean & Men card. 

Because, again, Dean has filled the slot of Woman™ of Female Lead™ and the flirting would’ve been straight if Dean was a woman. It’s a plot device, they needed to have the guest character be disarming, be cute, make the main character flustered. 

It’s just the main character is a man, because they’re allergic to women. But they still need those female plots, tools of femininity, to move their show forward. I mean I am a big subscriber to transmasc Jo (no idea if anyone else is with me on this one, but let me explain). Jo is in love with Dean (concept) not Dean (actuality). Which, we’ve all had our eggs cracked by someone like that. We were in love with them until we realized we just wanted to be them.

He loved her like a little sister, she loved him like a lost idol. He’s a golden calf and she dies for him, because she believed in him, she was the original character dashed at the altar of the Winchesters. 

I fully believe if she had lived and if this show had a crumb of actual good writing Jo could have been a deeply compelling transmasc character. But I also think she’s a fascinating inversion of Dean. Dean is a Masculine Character who subverts Toxic Masculinity, Jo is a Tomboy™ she’s not your (if you take it straight, literally and metaphorically) average female love interest. She’s angry, she’s not soft at all, all edges and corners and thorns. She isn’t helpless, she’s stubborn but not in a “you’re going to get punished for this” way. She’s right when she’s stubborn. She’s helpful, she’s a martyr. 

I could do a whole other essay just on Jo (and Ellen, and Ash, what a fucking trio!) but needless to say Jo was one of the first...plot device feminine tools sacrificed to this show. She was a regular, she was unique, she was an engaging character, and she still died (to progress the plot? no. for man pain? yeah, for like three episodes maybe, and then it’s forgotten just like the rest of Dean’s trauma, as we mentioned above). 

Dean and Women and Love is a very interesting tool used too because. Boy they sure try to make Dean love women and it fails in small ways, and in big, meaningless, failed het domesticity (again) ways. Not to mention whatever Lust (in the form of a woman) having no effect upon him, when they could have used that moment to assert his Masculinity and Heterosexuality. He behaved normally? And...also...whatever the fuck the Adios thing was!

Like they have these opportunities to make him Traditionally (toxically) Masculine, but make the choice to...not? To soften him. Because it’s a tool. He’s their female lead, textually he had to take on the role of mother(/father) to Sam, but...I mean this is a million miles long already. I know, but we absolutely can’t not talk about his Paternal/Maternal behaviors. (Which appear again and again again and again, outside of his relationship with Sam even/especially). He’s the mother hen, sage, safety net, beacon, home to so many side characters they meet.

I mean in many ways Jody is also a Dean comparison. Lost her family. Found a new family. She is non-traditionally feminine, but easily flustered and Silly™ (let’s just drop the entire sex talk over family dinner scene with Alex and the boys and looking to them for help, even though she was already a mother, and she’s a cop, and a hunter and this confident no nonsense individual.... She’s not). We are meant to see her as this hard ass, but she makes extra food for the boys to take back to the bunker. She’s deadly in a fight, but also still easily overwhelmed and put into damsel mode, and she cares so much even in the face of adversity.

It’s also fun to see how Jo | Jody are reflections of Dean at different points of his life. Younger, cocky | Older, settled.

Even when the text tries to tell us that he’s not.

When it reminds us that he’s violent. That he is his father, even if he says that Sam is more like John (which was reflexive, which was angry because of Adam and how Sam was behaving like Dean in that episode, and yes there are parallels to be drawn between Sam and John, the show barely dives into them). Instead we’re told that Dean is John (Again and  Again and Again and Again). 

So intensely that a fanfictionalized version of the Winchester Gospels makes it an entire fucking musical number. 

And yet, despite the texts insistence to make Dean Macho Man Father Reborn™ We get this Dean who is silly (and directly compared/contrasted to the female character in this scene), soft, in heels, nagging, and... Sully (you know Sam’s imaginary friend who has the same Haircut Dean has, who is a softer, shorter, friendlier, campier, version of Dean who was a replacement For Dean until the real one let Sam back in? That? Sully?) it’s hard to take them seriously. 

Hell, even when he was A DEMON? What did they do? They had him sing off-key drunken karaoke, they had him doing this ! Like that’s your hero, unhinged, free to be as bad as he could be, and you put him in a cowboy hat in a romance with the king of hell. 

The Female Lead, everyone. Who’s biggest betrayal(s) comes at the hands of his love interest (again, a man even though it was an angel who could’ve taken any vessel! who could’ve been recast, who canonically dies admitting his love to Dean - that one), who he tries so hard to be loyal to. 

The contradictions of his character are laughable. He is so emotional, but if he is engaged about his emotions? He shuts down, or he’s exasperated about being asked about them. It really is Female Lead/Only Here For The Plot disease, because everything is more important than him. How’s he doing? Doesn’t matter outside of the context of how x character is doing or that y character is dead. Or his emotions only matter if they’re done in penance. 

They also really do frame him as Pretty Boy™ in a violent way, or in a derogatory manner. They’ll give us homoerotic shots like this or these and never really acknowledge how these are gay shots. Sorry the gun scene is a a straight up sex scene, the beer sip spilling out over his mouth is oral, the scene where Cas fills up Dean’s glass with whisky is also a sex scene, they do this shit on purpose but accidentally queer it up. If Dean was a woman these scenes wouldn’t even matter. They’d be passing moments, but because he is not just a man but A Man™ they’re insane to see.

Not to mention all of these scenes and all the ones I haven’t linked where Dean dresses up. He performs masculinity, but he performs femininity too. He’s a plot device that is slotted in to whatever role they need. He’s Super Straight Butch Man™ but coaches the lesbian on how to successfully flirt with a man. He’s Action Hero™ who sits through a montage with the same lesbian and yays and nays her outfits, and enjoys himself.

Fuck he loves dressing up, he feels better in these costumes because performing a character is easier than being himself. Because who is Dean? He’s a tool, both textually and metatextually. It is exactly how the women and because of the women on the show that Dean is the way that he is. If there was a more steady female presence Dean would not be half as much of a plot device or half as camp/gay/feminine/non-traditionally masculine/queer coded as he is. 

In conclusion....

#dean winchester #supernatural #spn meta #spn #gender #anon #replies #messages #my writing #ANYWAYS PHEW okay anon i don't know if i even fully got to your point but i woke up at like 3:30 to this ask and i've been fixated on it #HOPE THIS IS EVEN JUST a little bit coherent #the way i meant for this to talk so much more about transness and eldest daughter syndrome and just FORGOT #oops #oh well

[sherlockmeowlmes]

Jensen’s comments on 15x18

(Source: @DeansSqueeQueen on Twitter)

DeansSqueeQueen: How was that scene emotionally being filmed? And also we never got to see Dean’s reaction because Cas got taken so fast. How do you think, if we had time, how he would have responded to him?

Jensen: Umm great question and it’s funny because I have, all season, in fact I don’t even remember the last time, maybe a big huge season ender or something and i don’t know who’s responsible for this because I would love to say thanks alot you jerk umm but they sent me a reaction video. It’s like a real time critique from a real fan and I found it fascinating. Like I said I don’t know, I rarely ever do it, I did it for 18 and I wanted to see what the reaction was, and that quickly led to, I didn’t want to go on Twitter you know.

DeansSqueeQueen: It was trending you know

Jensen. Yeah Misha sent me that, he was like, hey dude the episode is trending right now, and I was actually driving home from Colorado. So I was on like a road trip so I didnt get to see the reaction, so when I got home, uh, I looked up a few of the fan kind of reaction videos and there was one, this one guy who was the most beautifully reactionary kind of person you would want. And he was so emotional and I felt like he went through a couple boxes of tissues. But he was so emotional about that scene, and he had to pause it a few times, it was just really entertaining. I sent that over to Misha, and he sent me another one back, and so then I became really interested and wondered what the fan reaction is.

Then I watched the show, actually watched the episode, and I will say that some of Dean’s reaction of what I played into Dean, they did not use. Uh, in the final edit. But also some of the stuff Misha played in to his side was cut. And that’s very common, editors will trim up things to speed up a scene, to the point, they call it taking the air out of the scene. Taking the air out, and they’ll kind of condense it and it’ll be a concentrated version of that scene that was filmed.

I knew that scene would be, I mean obviously we’re saying goodbye to one of the most beloved characters to ever be on Supernatural. And uh also one of my dear friends, I actually had uh, i had one of our crew members take my phone. I was like will you just take pictures of this, and maybe some videos, because I want to remember this from my perspective, and not Dean’s perspective that’s on the screen, because that will be a highly edited version with music and visual effects and special effects and all that stuff and I want to remember this, I want to be able to go back and watch this, uh, from my, from Jensen’s perspective on how this happened between two friends irl and two friends in character life, and I was really pleased.

Misha had a tall order that day, for me I just had to be there and watch him kind of go through that emotion and get that all out and it was a beautifully written script and Bob Berens did a good job of crafting that dialogue. From Dean’s perspective, and Misha and I have talked about this, we’ve talked about this prior to filming that scene, during that scene, and we’ve talked about it since. I’ve actually talked to him uh, a lot this past week, about the reaction, what we want to add to that reaction, how we want to navigate that. Because we’re getting a lot of questions about what do you think, what do you mean, what was your intent, and he and i both kind of talked about, well if you, and this may be a little a little too out there but go with me here, well artists don’t stand in a gallery next to their painting and tell you exactly what you should be seeing.

And I kind of, I hope it doesn’t sound like a cop out, because it’s not meant to be, its truly meant to be. I knew where Jensen was in that scene, I also was making a choice for Dean in that scene. I kind of knew what I was trying to play with him, but at the same time what came across from a visual standpoint and a storytelling standpoint, and the audience perspective could be a multitude of things. And I would just, I would never want to tell someone what they should and shouldn’t see. Um, and not that, and again I’m not trying to do a cop out because I know it was a very important scene on a variety of levels, but I kind of, and I always thought i mean i’ll give you guys a little bit of an insight into.

There were no choices made on Dean’s part, and I hope I made that apparent because he was dealing with something far greater than what Cas was expressing to him. He was dealing with his friend was about to die. So I’m not sure that Dean absorbed or processed anything that was coming out of his mouth at that moment. And I will say that they were cornered. You know you had these two characters who only know how to fight and they were in a corner that couldn’t get out of So you couple that with the fact that now this person, this best friend is now going to sacrifice himself. I think it was all too much for one human to kind of absorb. 

But you also have to remember that Cas is a celestial being, and he’s thinking in a way that might not be comprehensible by a human heart or by a human brain. So the things that he says I always from Dean’s perspective, I don’t know if I understand where he’s coming from or what he means from a humanistic stand point, even though he kind of transferred into a human over the course of twelve years. But he was always coming from this, there was always an angelic aspect to him that Dean may, or  may not  have understood. So I don’t know, don’t know how humanistic the feelings being professed at that moment were, or maybe they were, maybe that was what was happening. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer. I think that’s the beauty of what this story gives you, hopefully it gives everybody something.

#jensen ackles #destiel #15x18 #deancas #supernatural

[sidecarghost]

Disablednatural Fluff - Deancas planning a date and being domestic

Spn 15x20 fix-it AU where Dean survives barn hook of death, because he receives medical attention. He lives a long, fulfilling life in a wheelchair.

“Cas, do you want to go on a date?” Dean looks up from his phone and meets the blue eyes of his boyfriend.

“Of course, Dean. Do you have some place in mind?” Castiel is seated beside Dean at their dining table. Their plates are empty after finishing a breakfast of pancakes and eggs.

“Well, some of the folks in the support group go bowling, and I was thinking it might be fun,” Dean explains. “It’s been a million years, since I’ve been bowling.”

“There were no bowling alleys a million years ago,” Castiel deadpans.

“I’ve watched the Flintstones, Cas,” Dean points out. “I think I know what I’m talking about. Plenty of people bowled a million years ago. Barney Rubble, Fred Flintstone, their buddies.”

“I doubt that show was historically accurate,” Cas counters with a look of disdain. “A million years ago you would have found the glyptodon, an armored, one-ton version of today’s armadillo. The animal roamed the lands that would eventually become North and South America. Was that in your Flintstone’s show?”

“Yup, they went bowling, and then a glyptodon ate Fred’s bowling ball. It was this whole thing,” Dean smiles, as he offers up a pretty decent fabrication on the spot. Dean’s hyperbole followed up by Cas’s dismantling of the hyperbole with logic, history, or science has become part of their love language. The dialogue provides Dean a way to bluster, and Cas a way to infodump. It is a game with no loser, and those are the only games Dean cares for anymore.

“I don’t know how to bowl Dean,” Cas admits.

“S’kay Cas. I can teach you, and I’ll be learning too. I’ve bowled before, but this will be my first time bowling in a wheelchair,” Dean says.

“It sounds like a nice date, Dean. I like the friends you’ve made in your support group. I’m glad you’ve found people that understand what you’re going through,” Cas settles his coffee mug on the table and rests his hand on Dean’s.

“Sorry there aren’t any fallen angel support groups, Cas,” Dean turns the hand Cas is using to hold his own over, so he can rub the pulse point by Cas’s wrist.

“It’s okay, Dean. The support group for family and friends of people with spinal cord injuries is very helpful. I think a lot of Heaven’s problems could have been resolved, if there was more of a focus on support instead of oppression and dominance. Humans are much wiser than angels on some things,” Cas says thoughtfully in between sipping from his coffee mug.

Dean had never thought he’d enjoy moments like this so much. He never thought this was something he could have. Here he is, eating pancakes, drinking coffee, and planning dates with his boyfriend. Ever since he was four years old, Dean’s entire life was centered on being a soldier for his dad and being a caretaker for Sam. Now Dean’s life is centered on living for himself.

For the first time in Dean’s life, he felt at peace and waking up beside his boyfriend every morning definitely helps.

“Remember when you said you thought this was the one thing you couldn’t have?” Dean looks up from where he is rubbing Cas’s wrist and meets his boyfriend’s gaze.

“Yes, Dean. I never considered—,” Cas begins and looks lost. And Dean regrets forming his thought like a question, because it really was too big a question with too much potential to spiral somewhere dark. They talk about their past best in the quiet of the evening, wrapped in each other’s arms, and laying under the stars. Sorting through their issues, this early in the morning, would be doomed to failure.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to put you on the spot, Dean interrupts, “I was just trying to say that I felt that way too. I always thought we were both meant to be weapons and good things weren’t meant for people like us. I never considered we’d be lucky enough to grow old. Let alone grow old together, live in our own house, cook meals for each other, and the whole nine yards. Now that I have this, it’s everything to me, you know?”

“I never regretted falling Dean, whether you wanted a life with me or not. But getting this with you makes me very happy. I could summon a million cosmic entities,” Cas’s eyes shine, and Dean could stare into them all day, just studying every place Cas’s irises fleck between turquoise, aqua, and baby blue.

“You did a decent job cooking breakfast,” Dean smiles and watches a soft smile spread on his boyfriend’s lips.

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas replies. “I will take payment in the form of kisses.”

Dean doesn’t wait to be told twice.

#disablednatural #Dean has a mobility disability #Dean in a wheelchair #human Castiel #Destiel fic #Destiel fluff #gumbelievable writes #spn 15x20 fix it #cw food #cw food mention