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girlbookwrm · 5 years

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Bah! Bah! Bah da-dah. Badabadabadadah bah dah dah! (<-- this is the iron man song)

THE MIGHTY ENDGAME REWATCH CONTINUES: PART THREE

(parts one and two are HERE)

The Gal Pal has joined us, so tonight we are three (@goteamwin is the Roommate and @pegasuschick is the Gal Pal.) This time we ALL pregamed with booze and cookies.

Further note: It Has Been Years and I Still Miss The Old Marvel Logo

The Gal Pal: For a second I thought this was Lord of the Rings

THIS WAS A GAMBLE. I have to remind myself of this every time I watch this movie because this was a hhUUUUUGE gamble starring a recovering addict and directed by a nobody using technology that had been tested in Transformers, a franchise known for it’s kwality filmmaking (not u bumblebee i’m sure you’re g r e a t)

(the roommate would like it noted that they probably stipulated in RDJ’s contract that he wouldn’t be fully paid until he finished the movie because he’d flaked out on previous filming commitments for. you know. getting arrested and going to jail.)

This is a solid opening. A Super Solid Opening, in fact. Quality flashback. Actually TFA, take note. This is how you do a flashback, TFA

WELL THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY

comedy moment with the stark missile here.

Howard Stark Mark I. (of three. Never forget. that there are three howard starks)

Oh No it’s Wrong Rhodes. Rhong Wrodes? just Wrodes?

Obadiah Stane? Really?? who thought he was a good guy??? although I love how easily he does this “getting on the stand to accept an award for Tony” thing. like he’s done it a thousand times before. because of course he has.

GOD THEY'RE ALL SO YOUNG

no da Vinci his a fair comparison, actually, given that Da Vinci apparently designed loads and loads of Very Deadly Things.

At this juncture, the Gal Points out:

Not to be super gay here, but I would observe that the later Iron Man movies get hotter lady extras. Just a note.

she is not wrong.

You're better than this journalist lady.

actually wait is she only sleeping with tony for the purpose of snooping?

SHIT SHE TOTALLY IS.

on the one hand DAMN PEPPER I HOPE CHRISTINE GETS MEDICAL ATTENTION FOR THAT BURN but on the other hand BOO GIRL ON GIRL CRIME.

Tony your music is bad

why isn’t it the iron man song

what band is it that does the iron man song

black sabbath, said the Gal Pal and The Roommate in unison.

tony i thought you weren’t a painter how do you even know who pollack is

The perpetual question with this movie: Was the script That Good or is RDJ Just That Good?

Will We Ever Truly Know

WRONG RHODES HAS A POTATO FACE RIGHT RHODES HAS A GREMLIN FACE. YOU NEED CORRECT GREMLIN POTATO FACE PAIRING.

Things that Date This Movie:

Tony’s suits (the fabric ones)

The phones (ohhhhhhhhhh my god flip phones oh my gooooooooddddd)

the fact that the hero is a new york billionaire with his name on the side of a building and people actually like him

Wait is Obie fucking someone? NO DON'T MAKE ME THINK THAT

I hate this part NOSE NO THANK U. GROSS. GROSS. NO I DON’T LIKE IT. NO. i came here for an ACTION MOVIE not a BODY HORROR MOVIE HELP PLS

Yinsen is v well dressed. like. Yinsen is SO dapper wtf Tony looks like a bum by comparison. And his chemistry with Tony is Un. Paralleled (except by pepper.) He fucking NAILS THIS ROLE. Ho Yinsen, International treasure

sub note YINSEN’S FIRST NAME IS HO. YOU ARE ALL VERY WELCOME.

sub sub note: The Roommate spent like fifteen minutes calling him Jensen. This Seems Racist. She points out that I am being racist for thinking that. She may be right.

the ten rings IT IS LOTR

“I don't watch Iron Man that often, it's always a surprise when I enjoy it” - The Roommate

I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T A PAINTER TONY. THOSE ARE VERY GOOD DOODLES FOR SOMEONE WITH NO ARTISTIC INCLINATIONS.

I love/hate that it’s like: Oh no this bad guy speaks English NOW WE'RE IN TROUBLE.

THAT. SEEMS. RACIST.

“Yes I would like a delivery date” says the roommate, someone very accustomed to working with clients that do not provide a coherent delivery date/schedule.

every time i see this scene i am reminded of that interview where Cevans is like: tthHHAT’S RDJ?? and then he licks his lips like the thirsty little bitch he may or may not be.

army recruitment - avengers - dick swinging contest - dumpster fire <-- this is literally the note i made for myself, i don’t know exactly how we got onto this particular sidetrack but look here’s the story:

the pentagon subsidized the early marvel movies, but then they stopped. that was a fun fact that I knew

the gal pal looked it up and it is Very Real. She was explaining to us that they STOPPED subsidizing marvel movies after the avengers because SHIELD. ‘Does the army answer to SHIELD or does SHIELD answer to the army?’

Me: SO ARE YOU TELLING ME. THAT THE ARMY. A REAL LIFE ORGANIZATION. STOPPED FUNDING MARVEL MOVIES. BECAUSE THEY GOT INTO A DICK MEASURING CONTEST WITH SHIELD AND MIGHT HAVE LOST????

yes

the answer to that question is yes

the military industrial complex is a dumpster fire.

32 minute mark and Tony has more time with yinsen than anyone else

I cannot believe it took them them THIS LONG TO FIGURE OUT SOMETHING WAS WRONG. No one thought to question that glowing thing in tony’s chest, just like: Nah that seems right. That’s part of the missile building process, right? They're working. this seems fine

It's still a horror movie but now Tony is the monster

he was always the monster

YINSEN WE HARDLY KNEW YE

Tony Tedward Stark you're literally the only person in the world who didn't know Yinsen’s family was dead. “I’ll see them when I leave here?” THEY’RE DEAD TONY. THEY’VE ALWAYS BEEN DEAD.

also: YINSEN IS AN INTERNATIONAL TREASURE

Tony, at the end of this fight scene, is A) deaf from all the bullets pinging off his suit. B) very badly burned, and C) has broken every bone in his body.

All Jameses in the MCU come with an innate Bullshit Detection Sensor. “Steve’s in trouble” “What’s that explosion? probably Tony.” JAMES POWERS ACTIVATE.

40 minutes in and this is the first time I buy Wrodes as a pal. Maybe

Tony Stark: BRING ME BURGERS. YINSEN TOLD ME NOT TO WASTE MY LIFE

oh hey phil is here!

Tony you have PTSD ---- aaaand you also have a burger stashed in your sling? that’s the best thing. THAT’S THE BEST THING.

UGH GOD OBIE’S ON A SEGWAY GROSSSSS (as if we didn’t already know that he was evil just from his NAME)

The Gal Pal, re Tony vs his PTSD: of course he builds himself a suit of armor. we're lucky he didn't end up in a gimp suit.

me, internally: bold of you to assume he doesn’t.

I refuse to even imagine this movie with Tom Cruise it would be so Wrong. (For those who don’t know, the studio really wanted Tom Cruise to play Tony, Jon Favreau really went to bat for RDJ against the studio, you know. on account of the whole. addiction getting arrested thing.)

TONY THIS IS A LABORATORY, WE WEAR OUR SHOES AND BUTTON OUR SHIRTS.

Mad money really dates this too. Add that to the list of things that date this.

Tony: Pepper you’ve got small hands, right? get down here.

Now is the perfect time to remind you all that comics tony has canonically been pegged by Gamora.

You Are Welcome

A) pepper is great. B) Tony is definitely not really going into cardiac arrest. C) I’m remembering that they were my first Marvel OTP and I love them.

Re: Rhodey and the whole “Manned vs unmanned flight” and Tony coming in like “What about just the pilot with no plane” or whatever QUICK QUESTION ASKING FOR A FRIEND WHEN DOES THE FALCON PROGRAM HAPPEN

RDJ and his big sad brown cow eyes.

The Roommate: I know I wasn’t into it at the time, because I was a youth and he’s like forty and I was like “No, he is Not For Me.”

Me: PAST YOU WAS A MORON.

The Roommate: Yeah i know that NOW.

Tony built his own keyboard that's so extra

Yikes generic ten rings bad guy you should put a bandage on that

ROBOT ABUSE, but also, can we talk about how much I love DUM-E, U, and also this entire sequence?

U is getting real fancy with the camera zooms

At this point we got into a discussion of whether the arc reactor gives Tony powers:

Me: Please. He’s a glorified normie. He’s the Batman of the Marvel Universe.

The Roommate: Yeah! He’s the Batman of marvel with out the...

Me: The what exactly?

The Roommate: The dead... no his parents are... the car-- no he’s got lots of fancy-- The pearls. He’s the Batman of Marvel without the pearls.

now we have to wait until Civil War to see if Maria Stark is wearing pearls when she dies.

PIZZA. Obie is like the stepdad with that pizza. “I’m taking the pizza back. Nah go on take a slice.” G R O S S

Paul Bettany! You're better as a disembodied voice.

The Roommate: I do not care for your purple robot form. I know Wanda does but--

Me: Listen. We’ve all made mistakes and bought an unreasonably large purple dildo

The Gal Pal: And we’ve all gotten attached to non-human characters.

The Roommate: Like the fox from Robin Hood!

The Gal Pal: Exactly. And hey, maybe he just keeps going, you know? like the energizer Bunny.

Me, Upset: NONONONONONONO

The Roommate: now hang on a minute that’s interesting.

Tony, i feel like you didn't think though. But seriously, what is this scene? Why is there a Ferris wheel? Are those the director's kids?

YOU’RE DOING GREAT, DUM-E.

Tony, quick question, did you cut holes in all your tee-shirts? Why? There’s no need for it? It’s Literally? Just for the dramatic effect? Tony?? WHy??? ARe YoU LIke THiS????

they are literally titty windows

these shirts are probably very expensive

sToP

oooo the bad guy (side note, put on a bandaid my guy. get some neosporin or something) has the iron man 1.0 suit and waaaIT A SECOND ARE THERE BULLET HOLES IN THE CROTCH ARMOR??? DID THEY SHOOT TONY IN THE CROTCH?

First of all, Jarvis is a treasure, I’m sad they ever got rid of him, second of all I love that Tony can just show up unannounced at a Very Important Party and no one questions it, third of all:

Poooterrrrrr

Oh hey Phil is here!!

Oh Pep. You are so on top of things, you basically run SI, you know your fear about the deoderant is just paranoia. You applied twice and you have an extra one in your purse and you’re wearing perfume. You smell like roses and victory.

O! T! P!

Christine, why do you have these photos where have you been keeping them why don’t you just pull them up on your phoneOHHHH RIGHT THIS IS THE PAST THERE ARE NO SMART PHONES YET FFGHSSJJSJSDKDKD I FEEL OLD.

Tony is standing on a higher step than Obie for this. The Smolest Avenger.

This is the first full iron Man moment but all I can think is:

Toe socks Tony? really?

~Cool guys don't look at explosions~

SOMEONE REALLY NEEDS TO TELL MARVEL THAT MORE VILLAINS =/= BETTER VILLAINS.

Rhodes sees the boom on the screen and is like but… Tony is here. in the US. I know he's here. I'm 99% sure. 98%. (explosion #2) I’m 95% sure. (by explosion #5) I’m 42% sure that Tony is in the US.

Definitely the worse thing that Pepper saw was him cutting titty windows in his tee shirts

MARVEL! MORE VILLAINS ARE NOT BETTER VILLAINS!!

beeteedubs We All Hate the way Obie says “data” and “manufacturing.” Dah-tuh. Man-uh-fact-ering. U G H.

YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND PEPPER I HAVE A NEW JOB NOW AND IT'S SAAAAVING THE PLANET

every movie ever: Is this hacking? Is this how hacking works?

Obie’s frankenstein vein and the way he slllluuuuurrrrps his whiskey. GROSS.

Oh Hey Phil Is Here!!!

What other applications?

WAIT WHAT OTHER APPLICATIONS ARE THERE FOR SHORT TERM PARALYSIS?

NO DON’T TELL ME I DON’T WANT TO KNOW

Hhhhhhow does Obie already have a specially designed arc reactor extractor?

TONY WHY DON’T YOU GET ON THE SCOOTER INSTEAD OF SHOVING IT AWAY? WOULDN’T YOU GO FASTER?

DUM-E IS A TREASURE

Re Pepper:

The Roommate: Pepper’s superpower is calling the right authorities and making sure the right people get arrested.

Me: so what I’m hearing is that Pepper’s superpower is being a responsible adult???

This Seems Accurate.

“Anything else I can do?” says Terrence Howard. “yeah, you can turn into don cheedle” say we all.

Where's the water in this creepy underground lair. Whyyyyyy are there water light effects? WHERE? IS? THE WATER???

OMG look at that cgi wowwwww he’s just coming up through the concrete and it is Definitely CGI.

dear obadiah stane: YOU DO NOT FIRE PEPPER POTS SHE IS ESSENTIAL. IF YOU FIRE PEPPER POTTS YOUR COMPANY COLLAPSES LITERALLY THE NEXT DAY.

Hey Obie. Did you put the Batman voice modulator in yourself orrrr...

Holy Cow Digital Hand is Very Digital.

HANG ON ISN'T THIS EXACTLY WHAT ANT MAN DOES TO TONY IN CIVIL WAR???

Blow the reactor, he says. JUST DO IT, he says.

The Gal Pal: Shhhh you can hear Howard Stark rolling over in his grave

oh hey Zuul is coming

OH HEY PHIL IS HERE!!!!

The roommate: THAT'S NOT TRUE SMALL AIRCRAFT ARE VERY SAFE

WAIT WAS CAPTAIN MARVEL PHIL’S FIRST RODEO? *need to see Captain Marvel Intensifies*

“Girlfriend who worries about me” Tony says. It's Rhodes. Right? I mean. He already has a girlfriend who worries about him. It’s Colonel Rhodes.

tony is so bad at lying

which is cute and all but FORREALS do you remember seeing this movie for the first time? whether you like Iron Man or not, whether you like MARVEL or not, this is fucking cinematic history happening here. this is the first franchise of its kind, it opened the door for so many others and it is so weird to remember that.

BAH! BAH! BAH DA-DUH. BADABADABADADAH! BAH DAH DAH!!

we have spent literally the entire movie waiting for this song to play

wow Jarvis u ok

THERE HE IS. Lookit him. with his eyepatch. he’s Seen Things. he’s Done Stuff. him and phil. geeze.

Me: I really wish I had just seen Captain Marvel

The Gal Pal: I feel like that every morning

i mean i don’t want to harp on this given that we’ve already moved on from the incorrect hulk but WHY WOULD TONY STARK BE RECRUITING ROSS?????

#the mighty pre endgame rewatch

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taaroko · 6 years

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Post-IW MCU Rewatch: Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Here we go, Winter Soldier. I somehow never watch this one outside of marathons, even though I know it’s amazing.

ON YOUR LEFT

Steve and Nat’s friendship is awesome. I love how invested she is in his love life and how confused he is by that.

“Well, all the guys from my barbershop quartet are dead, so no, not really.” I’m still trying to figure out how to define Steve’s sense of humor. It’s like quiet, deadpan understatement? I guess? I love it.

That shield looks pretty dingy, Cap. Could do with a wash.

There’s a really random sting in the score when Nat attacks a dude, and for a second you think it’s going to be a kinda retro spy score, but then it’s just over. Weird.

Steve has by now adjusted quite well to being a part of modern tactical missions, if less so to being a part of modern everyday life.

This French pirate dude really likes his unnecessary acrobatics.

Bonus points to Cap for doing trash talk in French.

One of the best parts about Steve and Nat’s friendship is how seamlessly they work together in battle. Whenever there’s something dangerous (especially explosions) on the way, she hunkers down or grabs onto him and lets him and his shield do the work, and they don’t even have to signal each other.

“Last time I trusted someone, I lost an eye.” Oooooh I wonder if that has anything to do with the Skrulls in Captain Marvel. Can’t wait to find out.

“I thought the punishment usually came after the crime.” “By holding a gun to everyone on earth and calling it protection.” “This isn’t freedom. This is fear.” Cap is not down with your surveillance state or pre-crime nonsense.

I love the awed little kid who spots him. So cute.

*pauses on Bucky’s memorial* “When Bucky Barnes first met Steve Rogers on the playgrounds of Brooklyn, little did he know that he was forging a bond that would take him to the battlefields of Europe and beyond. Born in 1916, Barnes grew up the oldest child of four. An excellent athlete who also excelled in the classroom, Barnes enlisted in the Army shortly after the attack on Pearl Harbor. After winter training at Camp McCoy, Wisconsin, Barnes and the rest of the 107th shipped out to the Italian front. Captured by Hydra troops later that fall, Barnes endured long periods of isolation, depravation, and torture. But his will was strong. In an ironic twist of fate, his prison camp was liberated by none other than his childhood friend, Steve Rogers, now Captain America. Reunited, Barnes and Rogers led Captain America’s newly formed unit, the Howling Commandos. Barnes’s marksmanship was invaluable as Rogers and his team destroyed Hydra bases and disrupted Nazi troop movements throughout the European Theater.

Wait a second. Up top, the thing says he was born in 1916, but at the bottom, it says he lived from 1917-1944. Wow. Nice continuity there, guy in charge of putting words and numbers on a single pane of glass.

Peggy! “He saved over a thousand men, including the man who would become my husband.” Yes and that man was Daniel Sousa. Oh hey, photos of Peggy with her kids! She had at least one son and one daughter. It’s hard to tell if the girl with her in the first picture is the same one as in the second picture.

The effect to make Hayley look old isn’t nearly as good as the effect to make Chris look skinny. It’s rather off-putting, actually. But oh man her dementia is so heartbreaking. “Well I couldn’t leave my best girl. Not when she owes me a dance.” *sobbing*

“What makes you happy?” “I don’t know.” *more sobbing* Everything that made Steve happy is seventy years gone. Steve is never not sad. No wonder he refuses to compromise for a second when it comes to Bucky.

The attack on Fury’s car is so nerve-wracking and he handles it so well. I wonder if Sam Jackson imagined he was going to get so much cool stuff to do in this role when he agreed to be in the end credits stinger of Iron Man.

The Winter Soldier’s introduction is masterful.

So...Fury pretty much got out of that by using his lightsaber. :D

Hi Sharon! This is some cute flirting.

“My wife kicked me out.” Was it because you insisted on taking your super-suit out for some daring do?

There it is. That Winter Soldier music. *shiver*

I totally bought Fury’s death when I saw this in theaters. Not sad that it turned out to be a ruse (I will never be sad about Marvel pulling character death-related punches), but I do think those bullet wounds were a little too convincing.

“To build a really better world sometimes means having to tear the old one down.” Heh. Except Cap is going to be tearing down your “better” world and standing up for the best parts of the old one.

Elevator fight! I love how observant Steve is. He’s always been that way. Just quietly taking in everything around him and putting it together. He’s brilliant. And then “It kinda feels personal.” Bahaha.

So if Steve falls a couple hundred feet and lands on his shield, it absorbs the impact ‘cause it’s vibranium?

Holy crap he took down a quinjet with just his shield.

I am not a fan of Nat’s straight hair in this one, especially with that center part. But it’s still better than how it looks in Infinity War. Especially the eyebrows.

Undercover engaged hipster couple Steve/Nat is so great. Steve is so bad at it and it’s adorable.

“Public displays of affection make people very uncomfortable.” “Yes, they do.”

I love Nat putting her feet on the dash.

There’s no way Nat didn’t know who Peggy Carter was. She asked Steve to gage his reaction.

They are pretty far underground, in a bunker. How did the missile even affect them? Did they make a special chute for the missile to go into in case they needed to blow up the base? Doesn’t look like it.

The design for Zola’s computer face is effectively creepy.

Hydra’s plan is so insidious and horrifying. Screw up the world on purpose until people want to trade their privacy and freedom for security.

That’s a really pathetic amount of milk Pierce poured himself. Like two inches in a really tall glass. Weird.

So...I guess Sam has a straightener. For some reason. Why couldn’t they have just let Nat’s hair stay wavy?

Steve is so sweet with Nat. She’s numbly horrified that she might’ve been working for the bad guys this whole time and he’s all nice and reassuring. Aww.

Senator Stern arranging for a young prostitute with Sitwell is gross.

Nat: *kicks a guy off the roof* *immediately transitions to asking Steve about girls he could be asking out*

Okay how does Sam have access to military equipment like his wing pack when he’s not on active duty?

STEPHEN STRANGE. How is he already on Hydra’s radar? There’s no way Zola’s algorithm accounts for magic, and even if it does, how can it possibly predict that he’d become a master of it several years down the line? It’s not like he was dabbling in it in his surgeon days. That came about as the result of a freak car accident! Pfft. They clearly only threw that reference in there to get people freaking out about a possible future Doctor Strange movie.

Bye Sitwell.

Hehe, as soon as the Winter Soldier shows up, Nat crawls into Steve’s lap ‘cause she knows he’s gonna have to make an insane exit and she will be PREPARED.

Okay I never noticed that Bucky ripped the freaking steering wheel out.

Gah, Steve getting tossed off the bridge and into the bus looks so incredibly painful.

So Bucky has now shot Nat twice. (I still ship it.)

There are some excellent kicks and knife fighting moves in this showdown. And the way the music ramps up is hair-raising.

I hate Runlow so much.

Maria is awesome.

Um, hi, Joe Russo. He plays Fury’s doctor! Dang! No role for Anthony, though.

“I’m with you to the end of the line.”

Yesss. Vintage Cap. And the shield is clean now! Symbolism!

HI DANNY PUDI. (Apparently Alison Brie was going to be Sharon Carter, but she had scheduling conflicts.)

I love this brave curly-haired kid. This is courage. He has no power and he’s so scared he might wet himself, but he will not launch those helicarriers even with a gun to his head.

Shouldn’t have helped SHIELD with that repulsor tech, Tony.

Okay, I guess Steve can tuck and roll to land a fifty foot drop without using the shield.

These helicarriers store their data in a really strange way.

“We’re the only air support Captain Rogers has got!” *all immediately get shot down and blown up by the Winter Soldier* Whoops.

I wonder if we’re gonna find out more about Bogota in Captain Marvel.

STEVE IS A CRAZY PERSON. You do not jump before you know you have your ride!

It’s a good thing Bucky neither knew nor cared what that data blade was.

I’d love to read a fic that’s just Steve and Thor sitting around talking about all the times Bucky and Loki have shot and/or stabbed them.

Sam has the correct reaction to Runlow’s nonsense.

Why is Jeremy Irons on the list of targets? I wish they’d put more Easter eggs in here, like the names of the Netflix Marvel characters and the Agents of Shield characters. It would’ve been an extremely unobtrusive way for the movies to reference the shows, instead of it always being one-sided.

It’s a good thing they were planning on firing after the count of 3, not on the count of 3.

Steve, you really need to work on your attitude towards exit strategies.

HOW did Runlow survive that?!

Steve would rather Bucky kill him than live in a world where Bucky can’t be saved. And that’s what saves Bucky. *wibble*

“On your left.” Bahaha.

Hi Pietro and Wanda!

Winter Soldier is awesome. I love a well-earned, narratively consistent game changer. One thing I definitely did not expect the MCU to do back then was buck the status quo, but they did it in a huge way, and they did it extremely effectively. I was deeply impressed. And it still holds up even looking back now. The way they tackle the issue of surveillance is very effective. Probably the best thing about this movie is that they realized that Steve Rogers was not going to work as a character if he adapted too much to modern times. Instead, they derived much of their conflict from the disconnect between Steve and his surroundings, and they added a deeply emotional connection at the core of it. Steve ultimately succeeds against Hydra and in getting through to Bucky by shedding his modern trappings and affiliations and going back to what he always was, complete with the old outfit and the shiny clean shield. Steve Rogers reminds us of the ideals America is supposed to stand for. Freedom, justice, honor, and truth. He makes us want to be more like that. Take a note, DC; this is the kind of thing you should’ve been doing with Superman. This is how you make a paragon character we can still be deeply invested in even as we look up to him. (They did a pretty good job with Diana, but the real test will be how she adapts in a more modern stand-alone film.)

Another great thing about this is that they kind of dumped all the side characters from Avengers into Steve’s story. As the First Avenger and as a man out of time, this a brilliant way to give him a new supporting cast without it being jarring and forcing us to spend a ton of time getting to know everyone. We already know Fury, Nat, and Maria and like them, so we’re perfectly prepared to watch them being awesome without feeling like it takes something away from Steve. We know the World Security Council. We know SHIELD. And then there’s Peggy, the Smithsonian exhibit, and Bucky that are all from Steve’s time. It’s a very solid foundation onto which we can add Sam, Sharon, Pierce, and Runlow. It just works so well. And Hydra manages to be even more frightening as an evil organization than it was in the first movie, when it was honestly kind of silly. (So many bonus points for how that played out in Agents of SHIELD, too. As far as I’m concerned, that was when the show finally got good, and it has steadily gotten better since.)

#captain america #captain america: the winter soldier #winter soldier #steve rogers #marvel #mcu #mcu rewatch #infinity war spoilers #kinda

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firebunnylover · 7 years

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Hannah Watches LOSH - Legacy

Legacy

We start off with Alexis testing/playing around with a mecha-suit she designed - as evident by the logo on it. Her robot, Woodhouse, asks if her method is necessary. To which she replies yes and goes diving off the building she’s on.

Due to reckless driving, she accidentally bashes the wings of the suit, and head to the ground. For Superman to catch.

I’m guessing that suit had a tracker, cuz Woodhouse was literally right there, ready to pick up Alexis. Leaving Superman with the suit and then cuts to the intro theme.

Is Lightning Lad part cat by any chance? Because that is a very cat like pose.

NO ONE CAN RIP ME AWAY FROM THE IDEA THAT PHANTOM GIRL IS BISEXUAL. LOOK SHE IS SCOUTING FOR A POSSIBLE FEMALE DATE. ND SHE KNOWS SUPERMAN HAS GOOD TASTE SO SHE WANTS FEEDBACK FROM HIM.

And then reveal on who Alexis is. Richest Girl in the Galaxy.

What have you done in the past Phantom Girl to be considered an expert. Tell.

And then we get Lightning Lad saying Alexis is out of Superman’s league, which Brainy – of course – rebuffs, saying that no one is out of Superman’s league.

So I’m going of a limb here and guess what a lot of people can just go to the front door of HQ, given that’s what Woodhouse did, to give an invitation to a Charity Event where Alexis will be at. Repaying the favor of saving her from a fate of a pancake.

And then B5 tells him that they were both scheduled for patrol, meaning schedule conflict.

Lightning Lad offers to cover, and asks Superman to see if Alexis has friends.

MY POOR SMART GREEN CHILD

But I’m siding with Phantom Girl. I refuse to read a report that’s 130-132 pages long. I don’t have the patience. Just give us the basics.

And he planned out the looking-out places to take Superman to, that’s cute.

But then when he see’s Superman expression, he says that the plan can be altered. And he sounds so sad.

And then we get another SupermanxBrainy moment

The way B5’s actions change after Superman promises to spend time with him later, it’s so cute~

At the party, B5 is basically the person who keeps texting you when they really shouldn’t be. Much to Superman’s annoyance.

When one of the guys at the party begins to make fun of Superman, in a manner that could be compared to the jock we saw in our first episode, Alexis delivers one of the harshest burns of all time. So harsh the dude had to go off to apply water immediately rather than wait for her to leave.

Bailing the party early, Alexis takes Superman to her building – which she is not supposed to be at unsupervised. And she stole a dude’s bike. Which Woodhouse just gives money to.

Also, she mentioned that the top ten floors look good as new, after saying that an experiment had some problems.

And she has a bunch of robots that just immediately come to her, like pets. Which is cute. And then you think to hard about what a lot of robots but no people implies, like I did. More on that at the end.

Alexis and Superman do some bonding on the overbearing expectations that others have due to Legacy.

They should form a club with Steven Universe. They would get along.

She also confides that she doesn’t have any real goals in her life, wanting to just mess around with her robots and have friends, which she admits she sucks at making.

And we finally see the scavengers.

And more grumpy-Brainy over the fact no one read his report.

I bet it’s been very long for Superman for just relaxing and playing games with another person to the extent he did with Alexis. Legion is too busy to take much time off for that sort of stuff, and they must be ready to go any time. And before then, he was a wallflower due to not being able to deal with his powers in the same way he can now. So, this is probably what he wanted for possibly several years.

Which leads to making this next bit even sadder.

At the point where the team is desperate, where Lightning Lad says it might be a good time to call him, he doesn’t answer.

Which lead to the part that destroyed some B5 fans figuratively, and B5 partially.

This took the longest to make a gif that i can put here. it looked so much better on photoshop.

Ironically, when I first saw this episode – this was the second episode of LoSH I watched when I first saw the series, and it was on a rerun – this part is what made B5 a cartoon crush.

I have a bad habit of wanting my favorite characters to suffer.

Later, we see that B5’s body can repair itself, but it takes a while.

Phantom Girl seems to immediately grasp what happened from Superman.

GOD BRAINY YOU JEALOUS?!

Also I like how B5 and Lightning Lad are just in sync at this part.

Oh it’s like when a friend buys tickets for that event thing for that series/fandom they’re super hyped about and invite you and you know squat about it.

And B5 is like that one person who hates that other fandom.

WOW. THAT’S PEARL LEVEL SALT.

So upon Superman explaining, Alexis takes it pretty well at first, trying to set a limit on how long they’ll hang out. But later we see that she gets carried away. Too carried away. To the point where Superman has to leave in a way that leaves both of them upset.

Back with the green bean, we find out he missed patrol again. Good god, if that was me I would straight up be panicking.

“Oh no…”

But in other news, green bean is salty.

And we know our beloved Puppy is on Rimbor. I hope puppy is coping well in this episode.

Woodhouse calls in to say that Alexis is in trouble, Superman tries to appease Brainy by saying it should be passed on to the Science Police. Phantom Girl seems like she expects B5 to insist on that, but to her surprise, Brainy tells Superman to go. While delivering a reminder to keep the communicator on.

I just love her expression here.

NO SQUEAKY TOY ROBOT!

And then comes the reveal that Alexis faked being in an emergency. Which Superman does not take very happily. And rightfully so, given that he’s supposed to protect people.

But then comes an interesting part to me that said something about Alexis.

Ok let’s lay things out. She got really upset that Superman left her, and she impulsively did something that she knew would get him to come, without thinking it through. She didn’t plan it out through, or at least the bit when Superman found out.

I had a recent discussion with a friend who requested to remain anonymous about what this suggests, which I’ll discuss further down below in character. Cuz if I start here, it’ll take forever for me to finish.

He clearly states that his team mates need him while she just wants a friend. She responds that what she wants is more important.

Seeing that he’s picking the Legion over her, she makes another impulsive decision. Helping the Scavengers.

Alexis then provides a decoy to get Superman to leave the HQ while she and the Scavengers attack.

BRAINY WHAT IS YOUR BODY EVEN DOING?

PFFT

During the fight, we see Lightning Lad isn’t afraid to electrocute people with water. Taking it a little far dude. And Saturn Girl is strong enough to smash metal.

I would feel more horrified about B5’s lab if I didn’t already figure he blows it up all the time.

NINJA BRAINY

Upon returning, Superman is pretty much pissed while Alexis just casually says “HEY!”

“Didn’t think this through, did we?”

Oof. Alexis’ weakness summed up.

“I guess I got a little carried away.”

“YA THINK?!

Unfortunately, Alexis lack of a backup plan leads to her getting caught in her mecha-suit exploding, leading to her hair falling out.

With our first look at Talkron Galtos, we see she manages to repair Woodhouse’s head so that he’s functioning enough to talk to her, where she discloses to him that she knows what she wants to do with her life, and the carving into her desk is enough to imply what that is.

So final thoughts on the episode overall.

Ironically, the episode before had a happier ending than this one. It goes from the tone of the more cheery episodes like Man of Tomorrow to ending in a tone we would expect in episodes like Timber Wolf.

It starts off with Superman finding some companionship in someone outside the Legion and wants to interact with him outside work. And it ends with him having to stop that person from hurting his friends. That isn’t going to be easy to swallow for him.

What’s adds to the tragedy of it all is that if they had found a way around it, Alexis could have been friends with Superman, and maybe with the Legion as well. But she made major errors on her part, as did Superman. Ditching her abruptly probably isn’t the best way to say bye to a friend – he probably could have invited her over to HQ instead. And storming off after finding out she pulled a stunt to get him to come isn’t the best reaction either.

Brainiac 5 was interesting to watch as well. NOT INCLUDING THE ARM INCIDENT. He probably sees Superman as this flawless being at the beginning, saying no one is out of his league, but what happens? He realizes Superman isn’t flawless. He realizes Superman will mess up every now and then.

Something I never noticed before but did this time is the parallels between Alexis and Brainiac 5. Both characters descendants of enemies of Superman, carrying their legacy. Both are genius inventors. Both aren’t the best at socializing. Both try to adjust to sharing time with Superman at first. Both fail with the adjustment, and both get upset. Both blame the other party for stealing Superman away in some degree.

The most noticeable difference is how they handled it.

Brainiac 5 realizes that Superman cares about Alexis, and that he also still cares about the Legion. He knows he can’t have Superman to himself naturally, as the guy cares too much, so he lets him go to Alexis when it seems like she needs him, but tells him to stay in contact.

Alexis didn’t. She didn’t think things through as she manipulated the situation so Superman would come to her. And when that failed, she decided that her only option was to get rid of the legion.

Speaking of Alexis, let’s take a better look at her.

Ho boy. Starts off as potential friend and ends as confirmed threat. But why? Well, I was watching this episode about a month ago, and I noticed something in her office that unsettled me.

She is surrounded by robots and toys. But nothing to speak for any interpersonal relationships. Nothing on family or peers. She’s isolated. Which led me to think that maybe Woodhouse raised her, along with possibly other programmed beings. Her best way to connect to him is with robots and building stuff, leading to further lack of social interaction. What that suggests is that she ended up having social development problems. She can’t connect to others well, as we see at the party.

But Superman showed signs to her that he cared about her. He was probably the first organic thing to care in a long time. So what happens? She latches on, and isn’t ready for being told he can’t be with her, and can’t understand that a line has been crossed.

As for the impulsive behavior, I had discussed it with another friend who requested to remain anonymous. They suggested that Alexis has, possibly, bipolar disorder, which is either undiagnosed or not getting treated.

Now before I continue, I know that media and mental disorders do not have a good relationship, with disorders getting portrayed horribly, usually by the antagonists. But the friend I discussed this has been diagnosed for being bipolar, so I ran this by them several times before posting. I’ll try to discuss this part carefully. But if you feel that I said anything wrong regarding this subject, PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

There are several types of bipolar disorder, but it’s essentially an extreme change in mood, thought, and behavior, with highs/mania, and lows/depression, with the change lasting different ranges of time. A less extreme case of mania is called hypomania.

Mania episodes vary people to people, but symptoms include:

Abnormally upbeat, jumpy or wired

Increased activity, energy or agitation

Exaggerated sense of well-being and self-confidence (euphoria)

Decreased need for sleep

Unusual talkativeness

Racing thoughts

Easily distracted

Poor decision-making

Reckless behavior

Being agitated/irritable

Alexis is upbeat, active, talkative, easily distracted as seen when she and Superman were going around to different places and she lost track of time, has poor decision making and is reckless in this episode. So arguably, she is having a manic episode when this episode. But given we just met her, it’s hard to immediately say that’s the case since we haven’t seen if she’s always like this or not.

My friend said that bipolar disorder sometimes leads to negative emotions making you feel frustrated/angry/sad and you do more destructive things.

So when Superman stops hanging, she makes the reckless decision to trick him into coming, not thinking about what will happen afterwards. And this repeats when she sees him picking the Legion over her.

If you’re interested in reading more about bipolar disorder, here’s a good source that my friend gave the thumbs up for.

Still, Alexis had little comprehension on how she should have proceeded to avoid what happened. But there are signs she needed help.

And no signs of her getting that help soon.

Characters in this episode:

Ho boy. Superman did not have it easy. This episode probably left him in a worst place than where it started. But I like how he tried to balance things out between Alexis and the Legion at first. And when he finally gets to unwind fully, stuff happens that forces him to prioritize one over the other. Poor guy.

Brainiac 5 – we see more signs of the crush once again. But also a lot of bitterness. He wasn’t happy to being made second priority in the episode, but he manages to put his own wants aside. And the bit about the report was also funny. But what size was the font? Double sided or one sided? Very important questions.

Phantom Girl’s sass was wonderful to watch once again, and seeing her on the possible look out for a girlfriend just makes me so friggin happy. And she seemed a bit more understanding towards Superman’s situation. Well, given she’s also defined as an expert at the act of “Privileged but misunderstood”, she has expectations as well. Probably not as overbearing as Superman’s but still notable.

Lightning Lad didn’t have any run ins with karma in this episode. The only time he got beat down was towards the end with Alexis, and that was just regular fighting. He still teased Superman at times, but nothing too harsh. And he is protective of Brainy, as seen as he lets the Scavengers have it big time after the arm incident.

Saturn Girl is shown to be very good at hand-to-hand combat, and is very strong. I hear she’s shredded and has an eight pack.

The Scavengers were bland to say the least. We didn’t see them a lot, but maybe if their designs varied more between them, I would have found them more interesting.

Alexis Luthor is another fascinating character to play role of the villain, although I’m not sure if I’d define her as 100% villain in this episode. She wasn’t manipulative in the sense Dr. Londo was, and did seem to care for Woodhouse enough to repair him so that he was aware of what was going on, and really wanted to spend time with Superman as friends. This was her origin story for her villain arc. And it’s very good.

#Hannah Watches LOSH #losh #legion of superheroes #legion of super-heroes #superman #alexis luthor #brainiac 5

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isakthedragon · 6 years

Text

Super Sonic Thieves Chapter 4

Chapter 4 - Thieves of the Caribbean

Intro Cutscene:

Sly: During our stay with Thaddeus Cooper, I was looking into the Thievius Raccoonus (being sure to keep Thaddeus from looking into it so he doesn’t gain any future knowledge) to spot any changes to my ancestors. Just as suspected, I found the entry for Henriette “One-Eye” Cooper had drastically changed. Born to Rioichi Cooper, my Japanese ancestor, in the 17th century, Henriette had all the thieving ambition of her father. But not so much his stealth. Rather than follow in his footsteps as a ninja, she went down the opposite path and became a pirate. Not sure how old Rioichi felt about that but I’m sure he became proud as Henriette became one of the most successful pirates of all time! By the end of her career, Henriette’s pirate booty was the biggest of them all!

Sonic: Hahahaha!

Sly: Shh! Anyway, point is, Henriette was awesome. Unfortunately, as I discovered from the Thievius Raccoonus, all of her exploits had disappeared! Not a trace of her entry remained! No doubt Dr. Eggman and his goons have interfered with Henriette’s entry into the pirate life. Once we were ready, the gang and I headed off to 17th Century Caribbean to kickstart Henriette’s career!

Sly Cooper and the Gang in…

*It starts off with a view of a mast of a ship until the sail unfurls down, showing the title: ‘Thieves of the Caribbean’ *

-----

Hub Layout:

The gang’s hideout is in an abandoned shop on the outskirts of town. The town itself is moderately size filled with various shops and bars for the pirates to drink at. Northwest of town is a jungle with a river, and is mostly uninhabited. Southwest of town is the pier where all the pirate ships float, waiting to be weighed anchor. Out at sea is plenty of pirate ships floating about and varying sized islands hiding treasure.

Enemies:

Monkeys: Brown monkeys in low-ranking pirate uniforms that swing across trees and rooftops in search of anyone trying to rob the loot of their captain. Provoking them may cause them to screech out, calling for other guards. Carries/drops 6-8 coins to pickpocket has 10% chance of treasure.

Parrots: Colorful birds in mid-ranking pirate garb that fly around also in search of pirate robbers. Attacking them will bring on a counterattack with a bite from their beaks. Carries/drops 8-10 coins to pickpocket has 25% chance of treasure.

Coconut Crabs: Orange crabs in high-ranking pirate clothes that are in constant guard of their captain with their flashlights. Unless you sneak attack them, don’t ever attempt to attack them save for strong characters like Murray, as only they can break through their shells and defeat them. Carries/drops 8-13 coins to pickpocket has 50% chance of treasure.

Pirate Pawns: Pawns dressed like pirates that attack by swiping their swords and hook hands at you. Best to attack them from above to avoid their attacks. Drops 7 rings when smashed.

Skele-tons: Pawn/Badniks also dressed like pirates, they will throw their bone-like appendages at you. Attack them after they throw them. Drops 9 rings when smashed.

Egg Cannoneers: Giant badniks that carry around cannons on their shoulders (Think Egg Hammers, but with cannons). If they notice you, they will aim at you and fire away. Quickly get away from their target markers to survive. Only strong characters like Knuckles and Murray, or cannon shots can destroy them quickly. Drops 11 rings when smashed.

Par-rots: Flying parrot badniks that spit coconuts at in front of them, or drop coconuts from above. Drops 6 rings when smashed.

Octus: Floating octopus badniks that spit missiles at you. Drops 7 rings when smashed.

Aquis: Flying seahorse badniks that spit globs of oil that slow you down. Drops 8 rings when smashed.

Treasures:

From Guards:

Bronze Compass: Worth 45 coins and 23 rings.

Silver Compass: Worth 65 coins and 33 rings.

Gold Compass: Worth 85 coins and 43 rings.

From Pedestals:

Maltese Liquor: Rigged with a fall-damage trap. Worth 350 coins and 175 rings. Hiding on the roof of a bar.

Black Pearl: Rigged with a 1:45 bomb trap. Worth 500 coins and 250 rings. Hiding in a pirate ship in the port.

Golden Sail: Rigged with a fall damage trap. Worth 450 coins and 225 rings. Hiding on the roof of a shop.

Titanium Pegleg: No bobby trap. Worth 600 coins and 300 rings. Hiding in the forest.

The coins have a skull and crossbones design on them.

Secret Sighting of Clockwerk: Acting statuesquely on top of the ‘skull island’.

-----Jobs-----

A Pirate’s Life for Me?

Find Henriette Cooper

Bentley: “It’s becoming increasingly clearer with each passing time that we need to find your ancestors as soon as we can!”

Sly: “Ah, so you want us to go and find Henriette here, huh?”

Bentley: “Correct.”

Sonic: “It’s a good idea, especially against a guy like Eggman’s croney, Captain Whisker.”

Blaze: “Captain Whisker is a dangerous robot to go up against, for sure.”

Sly: “I wonder if he’ll be as much of a challenge as Lefwee was...”

Tails: “You’ll see. Come on, let’s help you find your ancestor.”

*The player takes control of Sly and Tails as they go around town, searching for pairs of guards sitting out in the open. The player must find a secret spot to hide to start the cutscene. This is done 3 times at a shop to the north, under a bridge in the middle of town, and a bar roof to the south.*

*At the shop*

Monkey Pirate 1: “Heh he, we sure did show Henriette not to mess with Captain Whisker!”

Parrot Pirate 1: *SQUAWK* “Showed her!”

Monkey Pirate 1: “She even sold the last of her ship stuff she could salvage.”

Parrot Pirate 1: “Wonder where she’s going? Last saw her going south from here!”

*At the bridge*

Parrot Pirate 2: *SQUAWK!* “Poor Henriette!”

Coconut Crab Pirate 1: “Heh, such a sad sack. Didn’t really feel right attack her considering what we did earlier to her ship and her mates.”

Parrot Pirate 2: “Maybe go drown her sorrows?!”

Coconut Crab Pirate 1: “Did seem to go south to the only bar that sells rum and lemonade.”

*At the bar*

Monkey Pirate 2: “Heh, did you see Henriette stumble by?” *He laughs*

Coconut Crab Pirate 2: “Seems she was already rummed up.”

Monkey Pirate 2: “Have to admit she holds well while holding all those bottles without breaking them.”

Coconut Crab Pirate 2: “Stumbling towards the docks, hope she doesn’t fall in the water and sink.”

*The player then heads to the pier. Upon finding Henriette at the dock*

Henriette: *Takes a long drink of her rum* Blow a man down is a blow me down trick. Blow - Blow - Blow - a man down…

*Sly and Tails cautiously approach Henriette*

Sly: Um… Henriette?

Henriette: HEY!!! Can’t you hear that I’m SHINGING?! It’sh very rude to interrupt one during a sea shanty. And don’t call me Henriette. I’m more privy to… Henri! *Takes another long jug at her rum*

Tails: Oh boy, I see someone’s has taken more rum than necessary.

Sly: I’ll say… *Puts hand to telecommunicator* Hey guys, we found Henriette. Er, “Henri”. But we’re gonna need help getting her to the Safe House. She's really drunk.

Bentley: Oh my! Okay, we’re heading out to help.

*The enemy pirates appear behind Sly, Tails, and Henriette*

Enemy Pirate: There you are, Cooper! We got you where we want you!

Henriette: UGH! WHAT DID I JUST SAY?! DON’T INTERRUPT ME DURING A SHEA SHANTY! That doesh it! Imma fight you all!

Tails: Oh man, you guys might wanna hurry! We’re getting ambushed!

*The player has to fight against the 4 waves of pirates with Henriette, also making sure not to let her be defeated.*

*During the fight*

Henriette: I may not have my cane but I can give a beating! Once this is over, YOU will be the ones needing a cane!

Tails: Man, for someone whose mental capacity has slowed, she sure can fight.

Sly: From past experience, alcohol can really bring the fight out of ya.

*Once all the enemy pirates have been defeated*

Henriette: Yeah, that’s right! Run away you stupid landlubbers! *To Sly and Tails* Sorry about yellin’ at you earlier. I shee now that you’re friendlies! Let’s celebrate our victory with a drink! *Chugs bottle of rum*

Tails: Oh, no thanks. I’m very underaged.

Sly: Yeah, and rum’s not my drink order. But we gotta-!

*Henriette falls onto her back and snores loudly, obviously passed out from too much rum*

Sly: Um...

Tails: Hehe, good thing we asked the rest of the gang to come. Now they can help us carry her to the Safe House.

*Job Complete*

-----

Sly: “Not wanting to chance another attack from pirates wanting to finish off Henriette, we hurriedly got her back to the safehouse. Once there, it took her a while to wake up in a hungover stupor. Through her slurring, she told us that she was severely depressed.”

Henriette: “Argh, how can I call myself a pirate anymore? A stupid robot pirate named Captain Whisker attacked my ship in the middle of the night. His first mate Johnny dragged me out forcibly and made me watch him kill all of my mates, steal all my booty of the past year, and then sunk my ship I worked so hard on! And worse, he then stole my cutlass canes! I… I’m a failure of the Cooper Clan. Rioichi… I failed you…”

Sly: “We did our best to try to relieve her of her funk, and tell her she’s unfairly had the deck stacked against her and we wanted to help her. It somewhat worked…”

Henriette: “No… Rioichi would want me to fight back myself… but how when I got nothing…”

Sly: “I then told her of our gang’s work of going through time, helping out our ancestors who were cheated, including Rioichi.”

Henriette: “Mmm… alright… you’ll be my crew, but I get to defeat that damn Captain Whisker!”

Sly: “None of Sonic’s friends objected and it was set. We would help my ancestor become a great pirate. Sounds like fun if you asked me.”

-----

Bentley: “From what I understand from Sonic and his friends, Captain Whisker is not a badnik to mess around. He’s probably gonna come back and finish the job so we are going to have to get moving on out of here. To do that, we have to build a ship. We know how to, but someone is going to have to gather the materials.”

Marine: “Oooh! Me! I can help find the materials! Sonic and I did it before!”

Sonic: “Heh, shouldn’t be much different to what we did in the Sol Dimension.”

Bentley: “Alright, since we don’t want Captain Whisker to get too much of an upper hand than he already as, we better canvas the bars and examine the info Whisker’s pirate crew have here.”

Rouge: “Leave that to me, I can bleed them dry of that.”

Murray: “Aw! I wanted to rough up some pirates!”

Rouge: “Mm, I guess I may need a distraction or a hand if things go south. Alright Murray, you’re with me.”

Murray: “YES!”

Henriette butts in suddenly. “HEY! What about poor ol’ me?! I wanna look for treasure! I can’t be a pirate if I don’t do pirate stuff!”

Bentley: “But I don’t got-”

Sly: “Uh, don’t worry about that, Bentley. I’ll help her with that. Besides, I’ve always wanted to embrace the pirate life.”

Henriette: “See, he gets it! Hooray!”

Bentley: “Right… well, we better get going!”

-----

Lemon ’Aided’ Information

Enter the first bar and take recon photos of the information there.

Enter the second bar and steal the information.

Fight the pirates of the 3rd bar and gain the last bit of information.

Rouge: “Alright, Murray, ready to become a distraction?”

Murray: “Always ready!”

Bentley: “Just do anything you can to drag their attention away from the information we need and get as much as you can.”

Rouge: “As an agent, that’ll be easy. And Murray should make it quite interesting.”

*The player enters the bar and finds a lemonade drinking contest going on.*

Murray: “Oh! You go to the rafters and take recon of the maps they have here! I’ll join the contest to distract them.”

Rouge: “Smart hippo. Alright then.” *She climbs onto the rafters.*

*First, the player controls Murray as they press buttons to drink up as many mugs of lemonade as they can. The more drunk will bring more of the pirates. Break the record, and all the pirates will be called away so the player can then control Rouge and take pictures of the 4 sea charts.*

*Once that’s done…*

Murray burps strongly, knocking out all the pirates. “Oop, excuse me.”

Rouge comes down from the rafters. “Heh, any escape would do. Come on, 2 more bars to go.”

*The player makes their way to the next bar.*

*They enter the bar and this time, the attention of the pirates immediately turn to Rouge.*

Pirate 1: *Wolf whistles* “Look, salty lads! A beautiful siren!”

Pirate 2: “I’ve never seen a lady dress so scantily, she must be a siren!”

Pirate 3: “I wouldn’t mind a piece of that booty, er, I mean, treasured lass!”

Rouge: “Oh? Such praise from the boys.”

Murray: “Reminds me of the time I was a geisha for a mission.”

Rouge: “What? A geisha? I- Never mind, this isn’t the time. I’ll distract them and you grab the blueprints around here.”

Murray: “Got it.” *He finds a corner to hide at.*

Rouge: “Right, Rouge, better turn on the charm. Heh, this is gonna be fun.”

*The player controls Rouge as she does a mini game similar to, er THAT, infamous minigame from Sly 4, but in a more tasteful manner (to her skills of course. :) ). Doing well will quickly drag the pirates away from the tables and to her. Getting all the pirates attention will bring control over to Murray as the player steals the 3 blueprints of Captain Whisker’s ship.*

*Once done…*

Rouge: “Alright boys, show’s over.” *She pulls out some grenade like device and drops it. It opens and releases a gas that knocks out all the pirates.*

Murray: “Wow! You really knocked them out!”

Rouge: “Heh, sometimes a man is better asleep. Come on, let’s go.”

*They leave and the player heads to the third bar.*

*They enter the 3rd bar and find some irate pirates.*

Rouge: “Hmm… drunk pirates…”

Murray: “How do we get by them?”

*One of the pirates notice them.*

Pirate 1: “Heeeeeey! It’s those landllllllluuubers that Cap- *Hic* -tain Whisker told us about!”

Pirate 2: “Let’s geeeet them, then Captain *Hic* Whisker will promote us!” *The pirates drunkenly get up.*

Rouge: “Oh? A bar fight, huh?”

Murray: “Heh, prepare to lose to ‘The Murray’!”

Rouge: “Hey, save some for my kicks!”

*The player controls the duo as they fight off 30 drunken pirates.*

*Once all are defeated*

Murray: “Once again, ‘The Murray’ proves triumphant!”

Rouge: “Now boys, will you kindly tell us where Captain Whisker is, or do we need to give you a worse thing than a hangover.”

Pirate 1: “Argh, no lass… please don’t… he’s outside of the harbor… waiting for you guys…” *He, and the other pirates, fall asleep.*

Rouge: “Hmm, seems we are in more trouble than we think.”

Murray: “Let’s hurry back to Bentley. He’s gonna have to hear this.”

JOB COMPLETE

-----

Material Goods

Knock down trees and return them to the safehouse for wood.

Steal some cannons from some ships.

Steal some rope and sails.

Bentley: “Alright, I need you guys to bring stuff that we will need to build a boat big enough to fit most of us.”

Sonic: “Well, we need a lot of wood, and I bet the trees in the forest would be useful.”

Marine: “Ooh! Cannons! Boom! We can steal from the pirates for some at the pier!”

Sonic: “Guess that just leaves sails and rope, and that should be easy to find in a town like this.”

Bentley: “Excellent! You guys know your ship building! Normally I have to goad Sly and Murray exactly 100 times to look.”

Sonic: “Well, we did it in the Sol Dimension and can do it again.”

*The player takes control of Marine and Sonic as they first head on off to the jungle.*

*Once there, the player has Sonic use his homing attacks to snap the trees at the base and make them fall over (Watch out for being crushed. :P ). Once that’s done, then it’s a simple task of pushing/rolling the trees to the Safe House. Do this for ten big trees to move on to the next task.*

*The player then heads off to the pier to rob the ships of some cannons. After fighting off the pirates guarding them, Marine must hit a target switch on the side of the cannor to flip the cannon over, so as to not damage the front end. Then it’s just a matter of pushing the cannons to the safehouse. Steal 12 of them to move on.*

*Finally, the player just has to search through town, on the hunt for free rope and sails for the ship. Finding enough will end the mission.*

JOB COMPLETE

-----

Pirating an Island

Pirate 2000 coins from the pirates and the island.

Sly: “Alright, Henriette, what would you like to do?”

Henriette: “I want to plunder treasure from the loser landlubbers on this island! I need to get back in the pirate groove!”

Sly: “Sounds like fun. How much should we steal to make you feel better?”

Henriette thinks for a second. “2000 coins! I want my booty!”

Sly: “Heh he, booty.”

Carmelita (In voice): “Don’t even think about it, Ringtail… not now…”

*The player takes control of Sly and Henriette as they plunder the town of its riches. Other than for the obvious coinage bouncing all over the place, Henriette also has ‘Pirate Sense’, which makes coins she steals from guards worth twice as much, and also raising the chances of getting treasures (also doubled) from guards.*

*Once 500 coins are collected*

Henriette: “Ah, how I missed the sparkle these coins make in the light.”

*Once 1000 coins are collected*

Henriette: “Just holding these bags of coins makes my spirits lift!”

*Once 1500 coins are collected.*

Henriette: “Oh? Almost there!”

*Once 2000 coins are collected, the mission is complete.*

JOB COMPLETE

-----

Bentley: “Alright, I got some good news and bad news. Good news is the ship building is going by quickly, thanks to Tails, Marine, myself and the pirates we bribed thanks to the treasure Sly and Henriette found. Bad news is that the other pirates of Captain Whisker have heard about what we are doing, and planning to sabotage us.”

Sly: “I’m guessing you want us to help out build and protect the ship?”

Bentley: “Correct. Carmelita, you and Amy will stay on deck to protect the mast and cannons and Murray, you and Knuckles will stay on the pier and thin out the ranks for Carmelita and Amy.”

Murray: “ ‘The Murray’ will beat the sense into the pirates.”

Knuckles: “Hey, save some for my own fists!”

Carmelita: “We’ll do our best to keep the ship safe.”

Amy: “They better not mess with us!”

Bentley: However, as cruel and hypocritical it may be, we’ll also have to destroy the other ships while defending our own. We can’t risk letting these guys chase after us once we hit open seas and take us down with their experience and numbers. For this job, I’m gonna have Panda King and Blaze team up once again to put their combined firepower to very good use.

Panda King: *Chuckles ominously* These ruffians will learn to fear the power of fireworks, and respect its beauty.

Blaze: I’ll certainly enjoy ending the “careers” of the low-lives that are pirates.

Bentley: “Good, then this shouldn’t take long at all.”

Building a Ship

Protect the workshop from pirates.

Destroy the other ships.

*At the ship*

Carmelita: “Hey! Those pirates are trying to attack the building crew!”

Amy: “Let’s stop them before they can hurt them all.”

*The player has Carmelita and Amy fight off the pirates attacking the crew on the ship and some that come their way until Murray and Knuckles arrives.*

*Once Murray and Knuckles arrive, the player takes control of them.*

Murray: “Alright! We’re here!”

Knuckles: “We got this!”

Carmelita: “Hmmm… now that Murray and Knuckles are here, perhaps we should help the crew?”

Amy: “Good plan, we finish that much faster.”

*The player now fights off 10 waves of pirates and badniks, that come at higher numbers and harder defense.*

*Once all the pirates are defeated*

Murray: “No number of pirates can stop us!”

Knuckles: “They’ll think twice about fighting next time.”

*We jump cut to Panda King and Blaze.*

Blaze: “Ready to blast up their ships?”

Panda King: “The pirates will be in awe of their destructive beauty.”

*The player takes control of them and uses Panda King’s fireworks and Blazes fire to supercharge the fireworks and blow the ships to pieces. Destroy all 10 ships to move on.*

Blaze: “That’s all the ships sunk!”

Panda King: “Perhaps we should return to the ship and help them finish now.”

*Jump cut ahead an hour to the ship being finished.*

Bentley: “Alright, that’s it, the ship is finished!”

Henriette: “Yar! Now we can set sail! Splice the mainbrace and all that pirate stuff! I want to go now!”

*Upon setting sail*

Marine: Alright, Henri! Normally sailing a ship is bloody hard work that takes countless people to operate, but me, Tails, and Turtle guy managed to make this ship require very simple controls! To steer left and right, just use the L2 and R2 buttons! And when we’re fighting other ships, go up to the cannons facing them and press the Circle button on one of them! All the cannons on that side will fire and the cannonballs will hit the enemy! Be careful though, for the cannons will need to cool down before they can be fired again, those lousy blowhards.

Henriette: I don’t exactly enjoy being taught how to sail a ship by a child, but thanks I guess, kid.

*The player is free to mess around a bit to learn the controls as they leave the bay, when a cutscene starts in the open waters.*

*A ship covered in steel and larger that the player’s comes speeding in and floats close by. A metallic voice pierces the sea air as Captain Whisker comes into view.*

Captain Whisker: “Ah, I see the wee lass who thinks she can be a pirate has procured another ship, and some friends too. *Laughs* How sad.”

Sonic: “Captain Whisker!”

Cap. Whisker: “Hmm, you look familiar. What’s your name again?”

Johnny: I recognize that landlubber! That be Sonic the Hedgehog, and he’s brought that mutant fox, the princess, and that annoying raccoon sailor as well (the other one)!

Cap. Whisker: Oh… OH! Not you again!

Sly: “Why are you attacking my ancestor?!”

Captain Whisker: “Heh, same reason my and my other acquaintances have! Dr. Eggman has a plan involving your ancestor’s canes and displacing their history! I’m simply fulfilling my duty in the place where I’m most at home. I admit, though, I enjoy shattering a young lass’ dream of adventure and sinking her ship ‘n’ crew while making off with her booty!

Some of the guys snicker, unable to contain their inner immaturity.

Henriette: You bleeding, knuckle-dragging, fish belching bag of VOMIT! You killed me crew and downed my ship and it wasn’t even personal?! Oh, once we sink your ship I’m cutting your head off and mounting it in my captain’s quarters of my new ship!

Cap. Whiskers: WELL! Such a vulgar threat from such a young lass! Very well! Let’s fight right here, right now! You beat me, you get me head! But I get yours if I be the victor…

*The player is sent into a battler against Captain Whisker, controlling Sly and Henriette, and they do their best to keep the ship afloat and fire cannonballs at Whisker’s ship. But it is mostly a losing battle as his cannons can damage your ship more severely than yours can to his (they just bounce off.) Once the ships is near to sinking, another cutscene plays.

Bentley: “Uh, guys, we need to get away! One more cannonball from him and we’re sunk!”

Marine: “Oh! I got an idea, mate! Silver, can you help me?”

Silver: “Sure, what can I do?”

Marine: “I’ll focus on making a wave with my hydrokinesis, you lift it up higher so we can be swept far away!”

Silver: “Got it!”

*Marine focuses on the water between the ships and starts to make it lift up in a hill like shape. Silver helps her lift it high enough to reach the masts of the ship.*

Captain Whisker: “A wave? How is that gonna stop me?”

Marine: “Drop it, hard!”

*They drop it together, which creates a huge wave that pushes the ships far away from each other, the heroes ship going really far away.*

Captain Whisker: “Argh… lost them..., aw well. The sea will get them sooner or later. TIme to return home…” *The ship speeds away*

JOB COMPLETE

-----

Bentley: “Alright, we are in deep trouble here. At our current ship strength, we have no chance at even damaging Captain Whisker’s ship. We need to find tech to make our ship stronger in all ways! Luckily though, it seems I have stumbled upon weak computer signals scattered across the sea. Since this is the past, it can only mean they belong to Captain Whisker. We better find out what they are and take them for ourselves.”

Sly: “Do you think we can do something for Henrietta too? She’s looking really sad right now.”

Bentley: “I guess we could go find treasure, but I’m not sure where to begin.”

Sly: “Seems obvious that we should just steal Captain Whisker’s treasure. Jerk deserves it for messing with her.”

Bentley: “Agreed, but we’re gonna have to find where it is first. We’re probably gonna have to keep an eye out for docked ships on islands.”

-----

Shanghaied!

Engage in pirate ship battles and rob the ships of their tech.

Bentley: “Five bogies off the forward bow, and since there’s a signal, it has to be Whisker’s ships!”

Sly: “Looks like they’re pretty weak, so we could take them on… wait… it looks like they have some technology on board.”

Bentley: “We might be able to use them! Don’t sink the ships, guys, just incapacitate them!”

Henriette: “That means shanghaiing them! I’m pumped! Let’s go!”

*The player is entered into a sea battle, like in Sly 3. First, you must incapacitate the ships of their cannons and mast, so they are sitting ducks. Then, Henriette and Marine will travel aboard each vessel and defeat the captains of the ship so the rest of the gang can steal the tech. Do this to all 5 ships to complete the mission.*

JOB COMPLETE

-----

Where’s The Kaboom?

Gather the 5 mines floating around the sea.

Bentley: “Hmmm, mines… clearly from Whisker…”

Marine: “Should we destroy them?”

Bentley: “Perhaps… but I think I got a better idea.”

Sly: “Ooo, I see that devious grin… I sense hacking and destruction in our future.”

Bentley: “Oh yeah.”

*The player goes through a hacking mini game. Once it’s done.*

Bentley: “Aha! I deactivated the mine! Now we can dive underwater and grab it!”

Dimitri: “Did someone say diving! Greasy sweet, bro!”

Vector: “Why grab it?”

Bentley: “If you guys attach them below the ship, we can use them like, well, mines, and blast Captain Whisker in surprise!”

Dimitri: “The danger, I love it!”

Henriette: “Is it alright if I join them? I can swim.”

Bentley: “Well, if you can stay safe while doing it, I won’t stop you.”

*The player then goes swimming into the sea below the boat with the trio, in search of the mine’s anchor point.*

*Once it’s found.*

Vector: “Who should grab it.”

Henriette immediately volunteers before Dimitri can and grabs the anchor.

Vector: “Strong minded lady… and strong. :P “

Dimitri: “Best not mess with her, bro! Come on, let’s hurry and protect her for the return trip.”

*The player returns to the surface, and a cutscene plays of them attaching the mine. They jump back on the ship to see Bentley*

Bentley: “Alright guys, good job! I scanned the sea, and found 4 more mines floating about. Let’s go acquire those as well.”

*The player does this 4 more times to complete the mission.*

*Once completed*

Bentley: “Alright, that should be enough. Heh, Captain Whisker is going to be surprised, for sure.”

JOB COMPLETE

-----

You Are A Pirate

Rob 1000 coins and steal the map piece from the first island.

Rob 1000 coins and steal the map piece from the 2nd island.

Rob 1000 coins and steal the map piece from the 3rd island.

Rob 1000 coins and steal the map piece from the 4th island.

Sly: “Whisker ship spotted off the port bow, on land.”

Bentley: “Hmm… they possibly are stealing treasure on the island.”

Henriette: “Hey! Pirate speak! We call it BOOTY!”

*Sly and the other immatures giggle.*

Bentley: “Fine. Why don’t you take Sly, Sonic, Charmy, and Murray along and find 1000 coins worth of ‘booty’ so you can drag the captain of the ship out? Surely, they might carry a map to where they stash all their ‘booty’.”

Henriette: “Finally! Now you’re talking my language! Come on, Charmy, you first!”

*The player has them go around the first island in search of 1000 coins. Again, some are scattered on the ground, but also in the air, which Charmy can grab. And as usual, robbing pirates always works.*

*Once 1000 coins are collected, a cutscene shows of the Captain leaving the ship. That is your cue to then go after the Captain and steal his part of the map.*

*Once that’s done.*

Henriette: “Got it! A map piece!”

Bentley: “Hmm, bring it back and I’ll study it as you bring more.”

*The player then heads off to 3 other islands marked by waypoints and robs the island of 1000 treasure and the map piece of the Captain. Once all pieces of the map have been collected*

Henriette: Thank you so much you guys! I feel like a true pirate again! And with the map now fixed, we’ll be on our way to get big booty!

*All the partners snicker at that last comment*

Henriette: You know, maybe we should start calling booty something else, cause this is ridiculous.

*JOB COMPLETE*

-----

Treasure Island

Follow the pirate map clues to find the treasure.

Bentley: “Eureka! I’ve found out where they’ve hidden their treasures, or at least the island. It has to be this one!” *A waypoint appears*

Henriette: “Well, what are we waiting for?! Sail away!”

*Once on the island*

Bentley: “Alright… it seems Captain Whisker left clues on where to find the treasure, so you’re gonna have to read them and follow them.”

Henriette: “Yar! Pacing away! Sly! With me!”

*The player has them head on to the island and follow the clues written on the pirate map that leads them all around the island, and to the treasure.*

*Once they find the end destination.*

Sly: “Hmm… it ends at this mysterious wall…”

Henriette rubs her hands on the wall for a switch “Obviously a hidden cave, just gotta find the- AHA!” *She finds the switch and a cave entrance is revealed.*

Sly: “Ladies first.”

*They both head down. Below, they find piles of treasure going for a while*

Henriette: “It… it’s a pirate’s dream!”

Sly: “Makes Kaine Island look empty by comparison.”

Henriette looks and notices something. “Oh? Is that? …” *She jumps into the piles and swims for a bit until returning with something in her mouth.* “My canes! Oh! How I missed them!”

Sly: “Well, no need to worry about your honor now. Let me call the crew and we will load the ship.”

Henriette: “Yeah… Oh!”

Sly: “Yeah?”

Henriette: “I think I remember where Captain Whisker and his men are.”

Sly: “That’s great! Where?”

Henriette: “Johnny, that weird green robot shark thing, was gloating about beating us up, and said something about how I’d never find them hiding on an island with a big skull rock on it.”

Sly: “Sounds like we have to pay them a visit.”

Henriette: “Gonna teach them a lesson about messing with Coopers, we are.”

JOB COMPLETE

-----

Bentley: “Alright, I think we are ready to take on Captain Whisker with Operation: Battle Out On the Yargh- wait, who wrote this? That’s a terrible…”

*Stifled giggling is heard*

Bentley: “B… o… o… SLY!”

*Sly and the other immatures laugh, and even some of the non-immature ones for still continuing the joke and getting Bentley good.*

Bentley: “You’ve lost Operation naming, pal! Now, if we’re done being little children, we have to take on Captain Whisker. Getting anywhere close to the island is obviously going to provoke a response from his ship, and he’s gonna want to settle the score. But this time, we’re ready. We’re gonna drop the mines so his ship runs aground on them and explode the armor off, then it’s just a matter of blasting the ship with the cannons.”

Tails: “Destroying their ship is probably going to evoke Johnny to fight us, so we better be ready to fight him. Then it’s just a matter of defeating Whisker.”

Bentley: “We got our work cut out for us, but we should be able to succeed.”

-----

Operation “Battle Out On The Yargh”

Take down Captain Whisker’s Ship

Defeat Johnny

Look for Captain Whisker and defeat him.

*Once the pirate ship is close enough to the island, a cutscene plays of Captain Whisker’s ship coming towards them.*

Bentley: “Full reverse, guys!”

*They turn their ship around and attempt to sail away from Captain Whisker’s ship, which is hot on their tail.*

Bentley: “That’s it… follow us… NOW!!!”

*Their ship gains a burst of speed, which lets them release the mines behind them. Whisker’s ship runs over them all, breaking off the metal armor and flipping the ship in the air 360 degrees.*

Bentley: “Attack them! We can incapacitate them while they’re dazed!”

Henriette: “Finally! Some revenge!”

*The player enters a sea battle with Captain Whisker’s ship. It may be slowed down, but it is still dangerous with its strong cannons. Best to attack their ship from the distance a bit. 5 full range cannon shots (About 30 cannonballs) will break the mast off Captain Whisker’s ship.*

*Once the mast breaks, Henriette and Marine raid their ship, only to find Johnny on the helm.*

Johnny: “Argh, so it be you two lasses that’ll exchange blows with me, huh?”

Henriette: “Don’t let our size fool you, you annoying tin can!”

Marine: “We can beat you!”

Johnny: “I’d love to see you lasses try! YAR!” *He takes to the air and zips around*

Henriette: “He’s a feisty one!”

Marine: “I got this, let me slow him down.”

*The player heads into a fight against Johnny the Pirate. In order to defeat him, Marine must first hit Johnny with her hydrokinetic water balls. Hitting him enough times will cause his propellor to fail and he’ll crash onto the deck. Once grounded, Johnny can only swing his small sword at you. This is then the perfect time to have Henriette wail away with her canes. Once enough damage is done, he’ll return to the air again to repeat the process. Do this 3 more times to defeat Johnny.*

*Once defeated, the other board and tie him up so he can’t escape. But they find the ship missing Captain Whisker.*

Sonic: “Hmm… where is Captain Whisker?”

Johnny: “Bah! You’ll never find him! NEVER! I was made for distraction!”

Henriette: “Quiet, prisoner!” *She smacks Johnny.*

Sonic: “Sounds like he might be back at ‘skull’ island?”

Sly: “All we can do is check.”

*The player is sent to ‘Skull’ Island with Sly and Blaze and go on the hunt for Captain Whisker. Like on Treasure Island, the player follows clues to find him, though his are much more dangerous to follow.*

*If you survive, the player ends up in front of a cave that they all enter. Down below…*

Sly: “Wow… it’s dark down here.”

Henriette: “Did anyone bring a light?”

Blaze: “Hang on…”

*She uses her pyrokinesis to light up the cave… to reveal dangerous stacks of TNT right next to where Blaze is standing.*

Blaze: “Uh-oh…”

Henriette: “Move, lass!” *She tackles Blaze away before the TNT explodes, causing a cave in that separates them and the rest of the gang, who are safe.*

Sly: “You guys alright?!”

Blaze: “Yeah! You guys?!”

Murray: “Yeah! We’re safe, but we’ll need to break you guys out!”

Captain Whisker lights the torches in the cave with his flamethrower. “Damn… didn’t do as I hoped, but at least I get to settle the score, with both ye lasses!”

Henriette: “WHOA!”

Blaze: “Captain Whisker!”

Captain Whisker: “No more talk! We battle for the others’ head now! Be prepared to go to Davy Jones Locker, lasses!”

*The player fights against Captain Whisker in the cramped cave space. Besides his flamethrower he showed earlier, he also can attack by launching his fists at you and creating shockwaves which rain rocks from the ceiling. You may think the cramped space is a curse, but it’s quite a blessing because he can sometimes knock himself out with the rocks falling from the ceiling or lose his fist in the rock walls, giving you time to attack him as he recovers. Just keep on your toes and Captain Whisker will easily go down.*

*Once defeated, Captain Whisker collapses in a heap.*

Captain Whisker: “Argh… defeated by the pirate and princess lasses... How honorable…”

-----

Outro Cutscene:

Sly: “It felt great to help Henriette and get her on the way to success. It took a little convincing to make Henriette not take the robots’ heads, but we able to take Captain Whisker and Johnny and return them to Sonic’s world and be handled with over there. Afterwards, we decided to honor Henriette with the ship and plenty of rounds of drinks at the bars at port. Heh, Henriette and Murray got into a lemonade drinking contest and it was pretty close with them drinking 100 glasses each, but Murray succeeded… and immediately burped and shot them into the walls. How fun that was, heh. I wonder what ancestor we’re gonna help next?”

Next Time: It’s time to get ready for war in WWI Germany.

#Isakthedragon's fanfiction #Super Sonic Thieves #SST #Super Sonic Thieves: Chapter 4 #SST: Chapter 4 #Thank you Kaotic for helping me here with Henriette.#I wonder if people like our Henriette.#And all the pirate stuff

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