#oh man it's a fucking nIGHTMARE when geralt teams up with another witcher for a hard contract

[laserdog10]

Toss a Coin

*Team RWBY and co. had arrived in Vacuo weeks ago, got settled in and begun making plans on their next move in bringing down Salem. But first, it was time to rest and relax, for at the battle of Atlas, they had just barely pushed back Salem’s Grimm army thanks to Ruby and her Silver Eyes. Afterwards they and Ironwood made amends, cleared them of their wanted posters, and got them a ride all the way to Vacuo. Right after they landed and reunited with Team SSSN, the first thing they needed was a place to stay...and some (or a lot) of money. So who other than to take a job of ridding Sand Striders of a nearby oasis? Jaune and Sun, both of whom where halfway out in the desert, striking up conversation.*

Sun: So you literally brought back this Clover guy from the brink of death!?

Jaune: Just in time, poor guy was close to flat-lining, if it wasn’t for me giving him some of my Aura, he would’ve died then and there.

Sun: You, my dude, are a damn hero...

Jaune: Yeah, I got that a lot after he woke up. The other Ace Ops were in near hysterics when he came to. *”Elm almost broke my back she was hugging me so hard...” he thought to himself”*

Sun: I guess all’s well that ends w-get down! *ducks behind a dune*

Jaune: What? Oh crap! *ducks behind another*

*There they saw the oasis, as well as the Sand Striders that claimed it. The Grimm in question were tall, their legs long and spear-like, jabbing the water for fish to eat. Their equally as long necks surveying the area for any trespassers on their territory*

Jaune: Are those the Sand Striders? *he whispered*

Sun: Yup, freaky aren’t they?

Jaune: They look like...giraffe’s with way too much nightmare fuel put in them.

Sun: Ha! Not a bad description, man! Now...*readies his nunchucks*...ready to kick some ass?

Jaune: *activating his broadsword* Let’s do this.

*The blonde duo lept from their hiding places and charged the four beasts*

-One badass and epic fight later-

Sun: HELL YEAH! That’ll teach ‘em to mess with the finest Hunters on Remnant! Hahaha!

Jaune, out of breath but smiling: How do you manage to always stay so upbeat, man?

Sun: The rest of my team wonder the same thing, helps keep morale up, Scarlet always says I’m like Jaskier from The Witcher.

Jaune: Uhhh...who from the what???

Sun, jaw going slack and eyes bulging: You don’t know about The Witcher?!

Jaune: *nervous chuckling* Noooo?

Sun: *throws an arm around Jaune’s shoulder* Well my fellow blonde amigo, you, are in for a treat!

Jaune: Heh, alright!

*Sun clears his throat, then hops away from the knight with giddyness in his step. He faced the setting sun, kneeling*

S: When a humble bard, graced a ride along, with Geralt of Rivia, along came this song~...*stands up*

S: From when the White Wolf fought, a silver-tongued devil, his army of elves, at his hooves did they revel~...*turns to Jaune*

S: They came after me, with masterful deceit, broke down my lute and, they kicked in my teeth~...*begins slowly snapping to a beat*

S: While the devil’s horns, minced out tender meat, and so cried the Witcher, he can’t bleat~! *claps, resumes snapping*

S: Toss a coin to you Witcher, o’ Valley of Plenty, o’ Valley of Plenty, ohhh~! Toss a coin to your Witcher, o’ Valley of Plenty~!

Jaune: O_O

Sun: Well???

Jaune: That...was...AWESOME!!!

Sun: I know right!?

Jaune: I don’t how it managed to be so catchy but god bless the person who came up with it!

Sun: Jaskier.

Jaune: Right, right. Awwww now I feel bad because I just bought a loot from the nearby market in the city and left it with the gang!

Sun: It’s all good, man! Song’s so good we hardly need instruments!

Jaune: Fair enough then. Was that the whole song or what?

Sun: Nope, figured I save it on the way back.

Jaune: Well then what are we waiting for!

Sun: Nothing! Follow my lead. *gets next to the knight wrapping his arm around his shoulder again*

S: At the edge of the world, fight the mighty horde, that bashes and breaks you, and leaves you to mourn~!

J: *remembering he’s partially heard the rest of the song before* He thrust every elf, far back on the shelf, high up on the mountain, from whence it came~.

S: Now you’re gettin’ it! He wiped out your pest, got kicked in his chest, he’s a friend of humanity, so give him the rest~!

J: That’s my epic tail, a champion prevailed~.

S: Defeated the villain, now pour him some ale~!!!

*And so the boys joyfully and boastfully sung their way back to town, heads held high and voices loud enough for all of Remnant to hear*

-Back in town, outside the hotel-

Ruby: They should be back by now. You think they got hurt?

Blake: Doubt it, knowing them Sun must’ve came up with something to get it done quickly, but also decided to give them some down time before they left. Vacuo is pretty...as much as barren sand dunes can get.

Ruby: *chuckles* Yeah you’re right.

Blake, ears twitching: Wait, do you hear that???

Ruby: Hear what?

*Through the throngs of people going to and fro, Blake’s sensitive hearing managed to pick up two familiar voices far to the right of them, who appeared to be singing in tandem with each other, to a rather merry tune*

“Toss a coin to your Witcher, o’ Valley of Plenty, o’ Valley of Plenty, ohhh~! Toss a coin to your Witcher, a friend of humanity~!!!”

Blake: That way, it’s them!

Ruby: I hear it now, I know that song! *she sped off like a rocket taking her teammate with her in a flurry of red and black petals. The reaper and Faunus stopped just short of barreling over their friends, looking at them with excited faces*

Ruby/Blake: HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT SONG!?!?

Sun: I know about it! Watched the show with the guys before you came here!

Jaune: I just sang along because it was catchy and I somewhat heard of it, how do you know about it?

*Ruby and Blake almost looked offended at the statement*

Ruby/Blake: We LOVE The Witcher!!!

Ruby, proudly: Played all three games and completed them all one hundred percent!

Blake, blushing and twiddling her fingers: I’ve read all the books, they were amazing. And I’ve...reread them several times now, haha.

*Sun and Jaune looked amongst themselves, eyes wide with realization*

Sun/Jaune: We have found our people....

-Later that night in a tavern-

*The place was a harmonious choir a Hunstmen and civilians alike, singing along as the four teens sang and dance with each other to the jovial song*

RJBS: Toss a coin to your Witcher, o’ Valley of Plenty, o’ Valley of Plenty, ohhh~! Toss a coin to your Witcher, a friend of humanity~!!! Toss a coin to your Witcher, o’ Valley of Plenty, o’ Valley of Plenty, ohhh~! Toss a coin to your Witcher, a friend of humanity~!!!!!

*They reached its end, the whole tavern exploding in cries of gleeful enjoyment, some demanding for an encore, raising their glasses and mugs in their stupor*

Yang: I gotta hand it to ‘em, they sure do know how to please a crowd.

Weiss: Think they would’ve cheered louder if I sang too?

Ren: Do you know the lyrics?

Weiss: N-no...?

_SSN: Then no.

Weiss: Hey!!!

Scarlet: Well it takes a while to get the song down pat, dear.

Sage: We stumbled and mixed a few words up when we first heard it.

Neptune: I would’ve cheered you on just for trying, Snow Angel.

Weiss, ignoring her creeping blush: Thank you! At least someone recognizes true talent.

Nora: Eh, I think they still had you beat.

Weiss: *growls*

*The group all laughed, meanwhile Ruby, Jaune, Blake, and Sun were actually being handed a few Lien just for singing the song from a few patrons. Truly, the song was a thing to behold.*

(A/N: This whole post was based around a headcanon my good man @darksaiyangoku came up with a while back, gave it a little twist of mine and added some slight Lancaster, Black Sun, and Iceberg (cuz why not). Go check him out, he makes good stuff, also watch The Witcher on Netflix if you haven’t, IT’S SO FUCKING GOOD!!!)

#rwby #ruby rose #weiss schnee #blake belladonna #yang xiao long #jaune arc #nora valkyrie #lie ren #sun wukong #neptune vasilias #scarlet david #sage ayana #rwby lancaster #rwby black sun #rwby iceberg #we'll say qrow oscar and maria are at the hotel sleeping #they pretty much need a nap XD