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#oh my god this is pure garbage
wonijin · 7 months
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EARTH ARCADE!READER/AHN YUJIN
headcanons and moments between earth arcade member!reader and ahn yujin.
tags: 1.5k words of pure fluff.
warnings: none probably
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you were the 5th member of earth arcade. a young actress that has been garnering attention recently.
laughter echoed throughout the stairway. suddenly, nervousness prevents you to climb the last few steps of the stairs . you peek in the corner to see a familiar face facing the doorway, lee youngji.
deciding there’s really no choice but to move forward you enter the doorway, bowing and greeting. everybody paused for a second, then chaos ensued.
“woah!” lee eunji, a comedian you often see on TV, exclaims before reciting your lines from your latest drama.
mimi, from oh my girl, joins in not soon after. even going as far playing the role of your scene partner.
“thank you for having me. nice to meet you.” you greet politely.
“gosh. you’re so formal.” younji poked fun good-naturedly at your antics despite bowing in response. “don’t worry. im sure she’s going to be infected by your rowdiness soon enough.” eunji quickly replied earning a loud laugh from mimi.
“wait. wait. do you know anybody in this room?” this time it was producer na who took a jab at your surprising awkwardness.
“well, i know you.” you look straightly at producer na. he chuckled at your honesty.
“i know everybody from TV and mostly from social media. this is my first time meeting everybody.”
before you can react, you hear youngji let out a load “oh!”. you turn towards the door to see ahn yujin, one of the literally and figuratively hottest idols in the industry.
you’ve only seen her on your screen. now, your mouth gape at the sight of the real thing. ahn yujin in the flesh.
withouth thinking, you bowed repeatedly like an idiot. “oh my gosh, what an honor!”
“miss y/n l/n. oh my god.” yujin ran over to you. and the sole reason you stopped your continuous bowing was to admire her. ‘wow, she’s so close.’
your eyes popped out their sockets as she takes your hand and shakes it gently. “im a big fan. i watch your dramas religiously. i can name all your projects, i’ve watched each of them at least twice.” she professes, not once pausing.
“thank you. what an honor. im a big fan of yours as well. wow, you’re hands are so soft. sorry, im being weird. its just- wow.” you breathed out.
laughter echoed through the room as everybody watched your exchange.
“its like one fan girl meeting another.” mimi exclaims. “their eyes turned heart-shaped for a moment like those cartoon characters” eunji added.
your eyes find yujin’s only to find hers already looking you.
yujin was a big fan of yours even way before meeting you in jiraksil. what she didn’t know was that you were bigger fan of hers.
you rummage through your luggage until you found what you were looking for. if the people around you didn’t know any better they would've you were a thief thirsty for something valuable.
“y/n, you look like a racoon in a garbage can.” mimi jested.
“aha! found it!” you exclaimed, holding up a package in the air like its a trophy.
eunji steps closer to inspect. “its an…album.” she traced confusedly.
“yep.” you walked towards yujin who was watching the entire scene unfold through the comforts of her bed.
you held the album with both your hands and extended your arms towards her, looking similar to a school girl confessing to her crush by giving chocolates.
“will you please sign it.” you shut your eyes tightly, like a school girl afraid of getting rejected.
in the show, you play the good-for-nothing chaos maker role together with younji.
“oh come on. do i really have to pair up with you?” yujin complains but her wide smile betrays her.
“how could you say that?” you exclaim then proceeds to chase yujin around, puckering your lips and making kissing sounds while opening your arms. you both run around, you chasing her and yujin trying to escape your grasp. she squeals and giggles. and when you did catch her you wasted no time in tickling her.
“somebody get these two love birds away from me. i can’t watch any longer.” younji makes a gagging noise.
nine times out of ten you mess up causing you to receive an earful from a perfectionist yujin.
“you should've known that! it was so easy!” yujin berates you. but despite her words, her smile beams at you brightly.
“how would i know that? that song is practically ancient.” your hands fly up in the air defensively.
“even i know that.” yujin retorts.
“that’s because you’re like a grandma in teenagers body. a normal person your age wouldn’t know that.” you argued.
“what?!” yujin looked at you dramatically like you’ve done an unspeakable crime, like you just kicked a dog.
“there they go again. they’re like an old married couple.” eunji deadpans at the camera.
yujin likes annoying and bullying you as a form of showing her adoration.
“eunseo-ah! i got something to tell you!” yujin stand from the couch abruptly to recite your lines from your drama.
usually, you take pride in your work but yujin had impersonated you for the nth time today that you can’t help but cover your ears.
“somebody please! make it stop!” you plead. the other members chuckle at your misery.
“eunseo-ah! i’ve like you since we were kids! please go out with me.” yujin continued, this time much more dramatic than the last.
she's reenacting a scene from one of your most famous dramas. a scene where your love interest, which yujin is embodying right now, is confessing love to your character, eunseo.
“eunseo-ah! eunseo-ah” the idol shakes your arm giddily as you look straight. she takes entertainment at your exasperation. and continues to mimic your characters from various dramas for the rest of the night.
yet she never fails to show her adoration towards you in other ways.
“eunji, what do you think?” yujin asks the older girl who was browsing at the rack of clothes.
“it looks amazing on you! you should buy it!” eunji encourages the younger girl.
“oh! it isn’t for me. its for y/n” yujin clarifies.
“im sure she’d be happy to receive that. in fact, im sure she’d be over the moon with anything you give her.” eunji recalls how much you dote on yujin. “you could get her a random rock and she’d probably treasure it like it’s from space.”
yujin’s cheeks flared red at the thought. eunji laughs at her embarrassed state. “you’re both such dorks.”
in the end, yujin couldn’t decide which one you’d like best so she bought three different clothes for you.
your relationship peaked in the wake up mission where you secretly help yujin because you felt bad for her.
you found out yujin’s mission when you entered the shower after her. the shower reeked of garlic. you had to laugh at the absurdity of the smell. in addition, there were bits and pieces of garlic skin on the floor. putting two and two together didn’t take long after that.
the lights were out. youngji and mimi were asleep but you were unable to. so you ventured out until you heard noises. it was faint but your mind is still alert from all the caffeine you took that day.
heading towards the noise, you found yourself before yujin and eunji’s room. you carefully open the door to meet yujin’s wide eyes.
yujin looked like a lunatic holding the pestle midair with her crazy eyes. you chuckle lightly, tiptoeing towards her. “you’re too competitive for your own good.”
“don’t tell anybody.” yujin quickly pleads.
“there’s no one to tell anything to.” your words put her at ease. at much ease someone mincing garlic in the middle of the night could feel.
“why are you still awake anyway?” she asks you silently. “i don’t know. i guess my body was itching to pester you.” even through the dark, yujin’s smile still shined bright. and you hoped the darkness was enough to hide the redness of your cheeks.
fans adore your dynamic with yujin. the push and pull relationship you both have managed to gather a lot of attention on social media.
“everybody, slow down. i can’t read your comments, they’re too fast.” you squint at the screen. you were live on instagram, hoping to interact with your fans.
after the live chat had slowed down, one comment managed to catch your eye.
“are you wearing yujin’s shirt?” you looked down at the said piece of clothing. sure, you had no memory of buying this particular shirt but that goes a lot for your other shirts as well. some were sponsored, gifts or bought while drunk. you assumed it was one of those three.
until, a loud ping came from your phone and a notification popped at the top of your screen.
yujinnie: yes, that’s mine. i put it on your suitcase so it’ll remind you of me ;).
you smile like an idiot while reading the text. then, you realize something. yujin is watching this live because how else would she send that in perfect timing.
your face flush at the thought of her being amongst the thousands watching you right now. and you flush a shade darker, because she must’ve witnessed you grin at her text.
the comment remained unanswered as you decided to keep this detail to yourself.
even after filming season one, yujin continues to support you by posting scenes from your drama. her instagram quickly transformed into a fanpage because of how often she would fan girl about you.
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dragon-ascent · 1 year
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The novel
You happen upon a cheesy novel about Rex Lapis...so of course you show it to Zhongli.
★彡flustered zhongli, mentions of sex and spiciness but just trust me it's fluff
The first thing you do when you return home is kiss Zhongli and say, "Guess what I found!"
Zhongli, smiling at your enthusiasm, cocks his head slightly. "What did you find, darling?"
Grinning deviously, you set a book down on the table. "Gold, my love, literal gold!" Your husband glances over at the cover of the book.
"What is-" His smile falters and his cheeks heat up as he takes in the...rather suggestive illustration. It depicts Rex Lapis in partial human form, with long golden horns and a brown tail, holding in what seems to be a death grip a petite young woman wearing a sheer nightgown. Also, Rex Lapis is shirtless.
"Morax is my Mate," you read the title aloud for him, "it's a sappy, crappy romance fanfiction about you and some random female OC!"
Your husband blinks. "Romance? I - he looks like he wants to kill her."
You shake your head with a snort. "That sultry look is meant to be hot and threatening towards rivals!"
"Rivals," Zhongli repeats. "What, pray tell, is this story about?"
"It's about this village woman becoming Morax's mate, as the title suggests. Celestia appointed her as such, and thus her ordinary life gets thrown out of whack! And Morax is like, obsessed with her for no reason other than she's his mate. She has no personality outside of biting her lip and tucking her hair behind her ear every other page!"
Zhongli's brow furrows. "I...see..."
"And guess what," you say, flipping the pages until you get to the part you want, "the smut scenes go on for pages and pages! This one in particular spans thirty-four pages."
"Thirty-four!" Zhongli repeats, paling. "And it is one scene! What could these characters possibly be doing?"
You stare him down long and hard, smirking. "Do you really want to know, darling~?"
Zhongli's cheeks go from pale to deep red. "On second thought, I do not wish to-"
"Fingering, overstimulation, tail-play-"
"Oh Celestia, please spare me from-"
"-Edging, double penetration, oral-"
"I have had quite enough of-"
"Bondage, bathtub sex, usage of titles like Sex Lapis-"
"S-Sex Lapis..?" If Zhongli could drop dead right now, it would be because he cringed himself to death. In fact, he sits down to process this.
Trying not to laugh, you sit beside him. "You look a little under the weather, hehe."
Zhongli, rubbing his temples, is the very picture of 'under the weather,' if not more so. If he were human, he would possibly have thrown up at least twice by now. "Give me that," he says, taking the book from you and skimming through the prose for a semblance of sanity.
Except, he only feels more and more nauseous with each paragraph he reads. Forced marking? A competing god? Toxic possessiveness? An uprising that somehow only this heroine with the personality of a broken vase can handle? His closes his eyes and wonders when he can return to the earth as dust.
Watching him intently, you ask as he closes the book with a long sigh, "So what do you think of this book that should totally be illegal?"
"Well..." Zhongli gulps and clears his throat, tapping into his rational side. "Freedom of creation and expression is a fundamental right which the citizens of Liyue are entitled to exercise. This...this novel has been appropriately tagged as a fictional work meant for recreational purposes, and therefore...it does not break any rules. It has every right to exist."
You flash him another devious grin. "Uh-huh. And what do you really think of it, Zhongli?"
He draws in a sharp breath. "It is pure and utter garbage and I sincerely wish to delete this from my memory forever."
"Aww, Sex Lapis doesn't like it?" you tease, poking his cheek.
"No, and I am not Sex Lapis..."
"Sex Lapis! Sex Laaaaapis!" Poke. Poke. Poke.
"Hmph. Are you aiming to be punished like in the novel?"
"Maybe..."
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amethystunarmed · 4 months
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I Need a Shovel to Love Him
Word Count: 4,226 A03 Link Richie calls Peter after the events of the opening night of Workin' Girls.
~~~
Holy fucking shit.
Peter is about to lose his virginity to Stephanie Lauter. 
They are on the couch in Peter's brother's apartment. Ted is gone for the evening, went to Ruth’s musical at the Starlight, but he had thrown a condom at Peter with a wink before he left. Peter was equal parts mortified and grateful.
By pure luck, Peter and Steph had managed to avoid getting tickets the same night Ted was going, giving them an opportunity to finally go all the way. They are making out on the couch, Steph straddling him while he gazes up at her in awe. Neither of them are wearing their shirts (Peter has come a long way from the first time he saw Steph in her bra and got so flustered he had to stop. He's just lucky she thought it was both hilarious and adorable). Her skin is hot against his, and when she trails her fingers down his spine, it gives him chills. Steph has finally taken pity on Peter, and moved to take her bra off herself, when the phone rings.
Pete sits up to grab it and Steph groans, flopping forward so her head rests on his chest. 
"Are you serious Spankoffski? You're answering your fucking phone right now?"
"I figure if it's my brother telling us he's on his way back because he finally realized the show isn't about sex workers, we'd want to know."
"... You get a pass just this once." She slides off his lap and Peter immediately misses her weight.
Peter fumbles for his phone and is surprised by the name that pops up.
The Power of God and Anime. Richie. 
Peter frowns down at his phone. Richie would rather die than make a phone call. For all Ruth loved talking to telemarketers, Richie about broke out in hives every time he had to make a call. (Between his phobia and Ruth's penchant for making the delivery boy uncomfortable, Peter had been making calls to Pizza Hut for them for years.) Richie wouldn't call. Not unless...
Peter hits the button and brings the phone to his ear, even as Stephanie groans behind him. He slides his legs off the couch and stands as he talks.
"Hey Richie, what's up? Aren't you at the show?"
Sobbing. Richie is sobbing. Peter's stomach sinks. "Richie? Richie, what's happening?"
"Pete?" Steph asks, suddenly concerned. Peter holds a finger up to her.
Richie hiccups. His voice is shaky, so much that Pete can barely understand him. 
"He- he- He went crazy, he killed them-" 
Peter feels like he's had ice water dumped over him.
"Who? Who killed who, Richie?" Peter gets up and grabs his shirt from where he'd thrown it earlier.
"Everyone, he- he-"
"Where are you?"
"The Theater."
Oh thank God.
"Richie, my brother is there, go find Ted, okay?" Ted was a fucking asshole but he would (probably) look out for Ruth and Richie, if only so Pete didn't tear him a new one. "He'll get you and Ruth out of there okay?"
"That's what I'm trying to tell you," Richie says, sniffling, voice hitching. "Ruth and Ted are dead, Peter."
Peter drops his phone. 
He doesn't remember what happens next. He blinks and they're in the back of Mayor Lauter’s limo. Steph is holding Peter's now cracked phone to her ear. Miss Tessburger is prattling on about something but Pete can't understand her. Her words sound like a broken garbage disposal, continually revving but never getting any clearer.
He blinks again and Steph is kneeling in front of him. She sways as they take a sharp turn. She should be wearing a seatbelt, he thinks, inanely.
"Pete, you're scaring me."
Peter doesn't know why. He hasn't even done anything. 
He blinks and they're at the theater. Steph's hand is firm in his, the only thing that keeps him from drifting away. He trails behind her, letting her guide him to the sirens and the flashing lights. Until he sees-
Richie.
Peter loses time again. Suddenly he is sprinting, and Richie is too and Peter slams into him and they fall to the ground and Peter has his fingernails clawed tightly into Richie's vest so nothing can pry Richie away from him and-
He is sitting in the back of the ambulance. A scratchy orange blanket is wrapped around his shoulders. Richie is next to him. He has Peter's hand in a death grip, squeezing so tight Peter is beginning to lose feeling in his fingers.
An EMT is shining a light in his penlight in Peter’s eyes. It fucking hurts. Peter blinks aggressively at him.
“His pupils dilate, I don’t see any sign of concussion. As far as I can tell, Peter here is just suffering from a pretty extreme shock.”
He gives Peter a pitying little smile. Peter wants to knock his teeth out.
“But he’s not responding.” Stephanie is standing off the shoulder of the EMT. She has her arms crossed over her chest, her chin cocked out. It’s the same stance she’d had when she’d stood down Max Jagerman after they first started dating. It means she’s scared. “You can see it, he did it in the car too. Why the fuck can’t he hear us?”
The EMT hesitates a moment, then speaks slowly, like an adult on Sesame Street.
“Sometimes, when someone goes through something terrible, their brain will... take them away for a little. It’s a defense mechanism.”
Peter has already heard enough of this. 
“You don’t have to talk about me like I’m not here.”
“Oh, thank god.” The tension melts out of Steph as she throws herself at Peter’s free side. Her arms wrap around his shoulder and she tucks her head into his neck, like she is trying to get as close to him as possible. “You’re okay. Jesus Pete, never scare me like that again.”
"Pete?" Steph and Peter pull away from each other to look at a Black man in a checkered shirt. He nervously fiddles with a button on the cuff of his sleeve. Peter hadn’t initially noticed him, but he’s pretty sure the man had been standing there for a while. He seemed vaguely familiar, but Peter couldn’t place him. "You're Peter Spankoffski, right?"
Steph pushes over the ambulance, and stands in between him and Peter and Richie. "Listen, if you want a statement, go talk to some other smarmy asshole looking to get famous off this. Try Linda Monroe, she has an affinity for vultures." She is so fucking cool, so brave. Peter thinks he may be in love with her.
Oh my god he's in love with her.
He's in love with Stephanie Lauter.
He wants to tell Ruth, even though she'll ask a million uncomfortable questions. 
He wants to tell Ted, even though he'd give some awful advice about not being tied down.
Peter squeezes Richie’s hand.
"No, no," the man says. "I'm one of Ted's co-workers? Bill. Do you remember me?” The name slots into place. Peter remembers him in the backgrounds of office party pictures Ted had shown him and from when Ted brought Peter to a “Bring Your Kid to Work Day” even before he moved in with Ted full time. He has a recollection of Bill smiling at him from where he had hidden behind Ted, telling him, Richie, and Alice Woodward to all play nice together. Peter gives him a faint nod, which puts Bill somewhat at ease.
“Look at you, all grown up. So tall!” He is studying Peter with a sad sort of softness, cataloging all the changes from that little kid he’d met years ago. Peter wants to find the nearest bridge he can jump off of to avoid this conversation. “I wouldn’t have recognized you if Ted hadn’t had a picture on his desk." 
Peter wonders if he spontaneously developed a latex allergy, it feels like his throat is swelling shut. “He... He has a picture of me on his desk?” 
"Yes, he does.” Peter waits for him to elaborate, but Bill just offers him an awkward little half smile. Which, what the fuck? Did he just come over to here to remind Peter he was going to have to go to his brother’s fucking office and clean out his desk?
“Bill, I don’t want to be rude, but... why are you here?”
“Oh.” Bill furrows his brow at that, like he isn’t actually sure. “We came here together. Ted and I."
Peter squints at him. "Like a date?" He knew Ted had been sleeping around the office (knew too much about it, because his brother was kind of a slut), but he'd been pretty sure he'd been hung up on someone named Charlotte.
"No!" Bill denies, "He- I had an extra ticket, and I- he was the only one who wanted to come." Bill suddenly looked nauseous. "H- he was the only one who wanted to come tonight, and to spend time with me, and the whole night I just-"
"So you're the reason my brother is dead." The whole group snaps their heads to stare at him, even the EMT. He doesn’t know why they all look so surprised. It seems like a pretty logical deduction to make.
Steph wraps her arm around Peter’s shoulder, but she stays standing. He feels small tucked against her side. It feels nice.
Richie gives his hand a squeeze and runs his finger along the side of Peter’s hand. It feels nice too.
Bill sucks in a breath, like somebody stabbed him. Which is fucking hilarious, given the circumstances. He looks at Peter like Peter did something to hurt him. It does not feel nice.
“What? Don’t have anything to say about it? You just said it, you were the reason he was here.” The EMT winces, and Peter glares at him. He wisely decides to fuck off to the front of the ambulance.
“Peter, that’s not- I’m didn’t-” Bill fumbles over himself. Peter isn’t sure what he fucking expected.
“I think you should go.”
“Right, right, but I just wanted to say, if you need anything, you can-” He fumbles with his back pocket and pulls out a wallet, nearly dropping it on the ground. Ted always says that Bill never knows when to drop a subject, and so far, Peter isn’t seeing anything to disapprove this fact. 
“Here,” Bill says, as he holds a white card out to Peter. “My number’s on there, you can give me a call-"
And Peter just wants him to shut the fuck up.
"I said fucking GO!"
Bill jumps and drops his business card. Peter feels bad, but he's too fucking tired to apologize. He slumps against Steph's shoulder. Her breathing feels like a gravitational pull, and he doesn't think he could escape it if he tried.
Bill scurries off, and Peter is grateful. “Fuck,” he groans, hiding his face in the crown of Stephanie’s head. She smells like sweat and that fruity shampoo her dad won’t stop buying for her. “Ted was right, he’s a fucking busybody.” It tears through his chest, even saying his brother’s name. He thinks the only thing that could hurt worse would have been not saying it.
It grows quiet. At least, as quiet as the site of a disaster can be. If he listens carefully, he can hear Chief Sweetly crying about one of the actors or Officer Bailey debating with Grace Chasity over who gets to keep his gun. (He's pretty sure Grace is winning.) The noises of the parking lot combine into a low background, police interrogations and muffled sobbing weaving into a dull drone. The police have turned their sirens off, but the lights still flicker red and blue and white. Peter closes his eyes, and the solid colors flicker across the black of his eyelids. The repetition is soothing, smoothing over the anxious hum that has been blaring a klaxon in the back of his brain. Between the warm pillar of Steph in front of him and Richie’s solid weight across his back, Peter finds his eyes drifting shut.
Richie’s shoulders hitching, however, gets him wide awake in an instant. Peter sits up, away from Steph, and pulls Richie closer to him, so he is angled toward Peter. Silent tears flood Richie’s cheeks. His mouth is screwed up in a crooked line.
“What happened?” Peter asks, frantically looking Richie over. He seemed fine when they arrived, but Peter had just been happy he was breathing, he could have missed something important-
"It's my fault Ruth is dead," Richie weeps.
"What?"
"I killed her, Peter. I killed Ruth." Tears stream down Richie's cheeks.
"I thought you said-"
"I told her to audition! She wasn't going too, she said she wouldn't get in. I'm the one... I'm the reason."
Oh fuck.
"Richie..."
Richie just sobs and latches onto his shoulder. Peter can feel time slipping again and he digs his nails into his palm to stay present.
"Richie, it's not your fault."
"I'm the reason she was here."
The sick feeling in Peter's gut twists deeper. That isn't what he... Fuck. What does he say? What does he say?
Steph sees his hesitation and gets a wild look in her eyes. Her hand flutters to the back of Peter’s neck. Her fingernails graze the skin in a repetitive line, like she is trying to beckon him back. He wonders if she thinks he lost time again. If so, she doesn’t say. She focuses all her attention on Richie. "It's not your fault, okay? You blame the murderer, you blame the theater for hiring this whackjob, you blame God for all I care, but you don't blame yourself for that shit, okay? That's how you drive yourself crazy, and Ruth wouldn't want that, you torturing yourself for believing in her. Okay?" She reaches across Peter and takes Richie's free hand. "Promise me."
"Promise you?"
"You won't blame yourself. Promise me."
"I'll... I'll try.”Steph opens her mouth, most likely to argue, but she is interrupted. From the side of the ambulance, the EMT clears his throat, far too loudly, and rounds the corner.
Steph glares at him, but only says, "We'll work on it.” Richie nods, and  Peter is positive he is counting on her forgetting about it. 
With the EMT back, their closeness starts to itch. Peter can feel him searching them, trying to figure out just what they mean to each other. Peter is pretty sure a vivisection would feel less intrusive.
The three of them untangle from one other. Steph habitually tucks her hair behind her ears, straightening to perfect posture. Even at the scene of a disaster, she maintains her image. Not that Peter blames her. He is sure Dan and Donna will have all sorts of footage from tonight all over the news tomorrow. As a local celebrity, Stephanie will probably get a featured segment. The thought makes him feel nauseous. "Everything seems to be in order!" The EMT says brightly. "I don't think you two need to go to the hospital. Do you three have someone who can take you home?"
"My uncle is coming to get me," Peter lets him know. He looks toward Stephanie and Peter. “He can probably get the two of you too!”
Stephanie's frown deepens. It has been such a common expression for her tonight, Peter feels bad. He has etched so much grief into her face. "But Peter-"
"I'm fine, Steph."
"No you're fucking not. You keep fucking... Leaving."
"I've been here the whole time."
"But you haven't. The lights are on but nobody is home. It's... It's fucking terrifying, Pete."
Oh.
Pete turns to Richie, who nods. His palm is slick with sweat against Peter's. He looks freaked out, even considering everything that has happened tonight, which Peter again feels bad about. He is letting everyone down today. Still... There is one person he can't fail. He can't.
Peter looks up at the EMT.
“Where is my brother?” 
Richie swallows nervously. Peter feels his Adam's apple bob against his shoulder. "Pete...” He says slowly, like Peter just asked if he could move to Clivesdale. “He's d-"
"I fucking got that." He doesn't need a reminder. "Where... Where did they take him. After."
The EMT presses his lips together. “You should let your parents handle that, sweetie-”
“Then it’ll never get done. Where is he?”
“Everyone who was... who had passed before we arrived was taken to the hospital morgue.” 
“Huh.” Images of Ted, pale and expressionless on a silver slab flash through his head. So many nurses were going to see Ted naked. He would have been ecstatic. 
Then Peter is laughing. He is laughing so hard he can’t breathe. Stephanie and Richie are saying something, and they sound almost frantic and someone is shaking his shoulder but it’s so fucking funny Peter can’t stop. Tears stream down his cheeks as he cackles. And at some point his laughs have turned to sobs. They shake his whole body, and he thinks he might be screaming. He falls into Richie, and Richie is sobbing too. He wraps his arms around Peter, and hugs him tight to his chest. Peter can feel wet spots on Richie’s shirt where he is soaking him with tears and snot, but Richie only holds him tighter.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Pete,” he murmurs over and over into Peter’s hair. A warm weight drapes over Pete’s back, and  Stephanie reaches up to pet through Peter’s hair. 
“Let it out baby, let it out.” Her voice is wet.
Peter isn’t sure how long they sit there, crying. Long enough, that Peter runs out of tears, and he just sniffles through shaky breaths, feeling like a wrung out dish towel.
“What am I going to do?”
“What do you mean?” 
“Where... Where am I going to stay?” His parents were out of the question. Peter wouldn’t go back, even if they wouldn’t just slam the door in his face. Without Ted to pay rent on the apartment... “I’m homeless. Fuck.”
“You can stay with me!” Stephanie assures him. 
“Your dad is going to be okay with that?” 
“Are you kidding? He’ll love it. Taking you in right before the election? He’ll look like a hero.” She scoffs. “He’ll probably claim it was his idea.”
A car pulls into the parking lot, a beat up red Toyota probably older than Peter is himself. The bumper is more rust than metal. At the wheel is the mean barista from Beanie's. She is wearing an expression that Peter has never seen on her before, blatant concern weighing her face. Out of the car, comes Richie’s uncle Paul. He is still in his suit, like he was relaxing at home in a starched shirt and tie. Considering everything he knows about Paul, that probably was the case.
“Richie!” He yells, louder than Peter imagined he could be, “Richie!” His head frantically turns back and forth as he scans the crowds.
“Over here!” Richie yells, standing and waving his and Peter’s conjoined hands. He has backed up, so the lines of their legs are still pressed together.
Paul’s entire body decompresses when he sees Richie, like he is sighing with his entire body. He staggers against the hood of the car, briefly studying himself with his hands, before pushing past it. He cuts the corner too fast, slams his thigh into the headlight, but he doesn't even seem to notice the impact. He speedwalks over to the back of the ambulance, running up to his nephew to take Richie's face into his hands. “Richie,” he gasps, like holding him is the first breath of oxygen he has gotten all night. Something about it makes Peter's already sore eyes sting, and he has to swallow a lump in his throat.
Richie looks up at Paul with a brittle smile. “Hi Uncle Paul. Thank you for coming.” He says it like Paul has picked him up early from a sleepover. Paul doesn't even answer. He just opens his mouth and then closes it, once, twice, then a third time. Then he pulls Richie forward, unflinchingly, into his chest. His shoulders shake.
“Jeez, Uncle Paul!” Richie shrieks, “You're crushing me.” He doesn't fight the hold though, merely wraps his free arm around Paul and squeezes. The hand still holding Peter’s trembles.
The mean barista jogs up to them, finally catching up from where Paul had run off without her. Peter remembers Richie mentioning she and Paul were dating, but Peter hadn't realized they were “Drive me to get my nephew from the scene of a mass murder” serious. Good for Paul.
"Hey kid. How are you holding up?"
Richie sniffs. "Sorry, Emma. I know you were excited to have dinner with Tom and Tim."
"Kid, you don't have to apologize for... For any of it. I'm just glad you're okay." She places her hand on Paul's shoulder. “Babe, you're going to suffocate him.”
“Right, right,” Paul says, distantly. He lets Richie lean away, hands slowly falling, like he is ready to reach out and grab him again at any moment. He glances over, paling at the sight of Peter and Stephanie. He clears his throat as he processes their presence. “Hello Peter. Stephanie.” He says Stephanie's name slowly, like midway through saying it, he realized he wasn’t actually sure he was right. 
She graciously doesn't mention it. “Hey, Mr. Matthews.” Paul frowns, like he always has the few times she's joined them for a study session, but for once doesn't argue. Instead, he turns to Peter.
“Richie mentioned that Ted... Is... Is he, um-”
Peter doesn't have the patience for this. “Ted's dead, yeah.”
Paul gets that same stricken look Bill had, and maybe Peter should be nicer, but to be honest, he just wants people to stop looking at him. Even the fucking barista, who Peter is 99% sure has spit in his hot chocolate, is looking at him like he's a walking tragedy and Peter can hardly stand the writhing weight of their pity.
“Okay... Okay, okay,” Paul repeats, slowly, taking a deep breath. "I'm... I'm sorry for your loss. Ted and I weren't close but... I know he really, really loved you."
It's so impersonal, so distant. It’s a stranger’s eulogy.
It's exactly what Peter expects from Paul. Their mismatched relationship used to be something Peter, Ruth, and Richie laughed at Ted recalling his "best friend Paul" while Paul clearly only tolerated Ted, at best. Ruth had once called it a "tragic, one-sided bromance" and Peter had laughed so hard, milk shot out his nose. But Ruth isn't here. And Ted isn't here. And Paul doesn't like Peter's brother. And Peter can't help but say it.
"Ted called you his best friend." From the way Paul's eyes widen, this is news to him.
"Oh. I... I didn't know he, um, felt that way. I kind of thought he didn't like me."
"Being mean is how Ted shows affection. He learned it from our parents."
"Jesus fucking Christ, Pete," Steph exhales, like the words pain her. She nuzzles closer to his shoulder.
"Speaking of parents,” Paul says, in that frantic way he does when he is trying to change the subject, “are they coming to pick you up?"
"Fuck, I hope not." Peter says, before he can stop himself. He groans. Fuck his filter tonight, apparently he’ll just say anything. Stephanie, Paul, and Emma are looking at him with barely masked concern.
“Peter can stay over, right?” Richie asks, nervously. He still hasn't let go of Peter. Peter can't imagine asking him too.
“Of course,” Paul says and nods toward Peter. Then he looks at Stephanie. “Are you... Are you coming as well?”
“I...” Steph looks between them. “I’m not-” It is the most at-a-loss Pete has ever seen her. “I wouldn’t want to... You guys were... Ruth and I, we weren’t... We only hung out a few times, and... I shouldn’t.” It’s Richie who reaches out and grabs her hand.
“Please, come with us. For Pete, and... for me?” Somehow, tears begin to drip down Richie’s face. (Peter is distantly impressed. He thinks that if he cried anymore, he would crumble into dust.) “You’re our friend, Steph. You are Ruth’s friend too.” He chuckles, and chokes on it. “She was so excited to have a friend who was a girl, you had no idea.”
Steph sniffles a bit. “She was my first girl friend too. At least, the first one who was actually nice to me.”
“Steph...” Paul says. Peter didn’t realize it at first, but his eyes are red. “Even if you think you weren’t as close-” Paul’s voice cracks, “-as you should have been, you get to be sad too, okay?”
“Paul...” Emma says, a twinge of genuine grief in her tone, but Peter can’t bring himself to care about whatever the fuck they are talking about, because Steph is looking between him and Richie like she is waiting for them to say something. Words are fucking impossible but to be honest, Peter doesn’t want to talk anyways. He holds his arms out and Stephanie falls into them. And Peter was wrong, because as Steph silently cries into his shoulder and Richie worms his ways into the hug, shoulders heaving, Peter finds he has more tears left to shed after all.
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tyforthevnm · 1 year
Video
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What we did for two hours was- there was this garbage can, like recycling garbage can that had a lid on it with the hole on top was about the size of a Coke can. And somewhere along the way, someone had gotten a miniature rubber ducky. And for two hours, we spent throwing the rubber ducky and trying to get it into the hole of the recycling can. And everyone- everyone in the room was so involved and took turns doing this. [Super invested.] Oh my God, to the point where we were getting so close, and there was like wars from the crowd and people being like, “You fucking suck! Are you kidding me?” and all our kids were there too and they’re talking shit. It was amazing. And it was like two, maybe two and a half hours before Tucker finally sunk one. [Oh, Tucker finished it.] Tucker finished it. [Central Jersey, great athletes.] But here’s the thing, like no one, mostly sober people, you know what I mean. Nothing on the rider, not a bottle on the rider. It was just pure fucking unadulterated fun. [And at this stage in the game, we’re talking about grown ass adults. This is a group of 40 year olds.] 40, yes! 40 plus. It was maybe the most fun I had backstage in a long time. – Frank Iero on Going Off Track #412
[videos from IG story by michaeldubin on November 27, 2022]
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ppgxrrblove · 2 years
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Oh Tumblr..your so predictable...sadly...
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I am sorry, but tumblr's melt down over Roe V being overturn is pretty darn funny, and something to definitely giggle about.
With that being stated I am super glad Roe got shot down, however,...there is always gonna be a however in this situation, these people decided it was a great idea to give the power to the state...instead of letting the people just end it all, instead we get the demo..the full package will cost people lots of protection, and well...this is uncomfortable to type this down but, there will be dead bodies for the full package to occur. Since tumblr folks are having - well tumblr witches, to feminists that I do believe are just plain witches, don't realize that Roe V..shtick is just limited.. sadly, it's a 'win' but not a win in a sense that you basically well send anybody in jail for killing an infants life, they still will be 'protected' using this loosely cause I know that folks will rightfully stop such vil ugly acts that is being done to an inoccent adorable pure life.
Nonetheless this was interesting to see the reaction of how it went down, because not only does it show how fallen society is in whole, but it really oozes out the real monsters that hide usually under ya bed, now they just ratchet rampant on wanting to murder, riot - all for the sake of killing a life that's not theirs anymore once you open those legs :"). Oh, and yes, I know of the satanic rituals that are gonna occur through out this week, cause these offended vile people -childrenofthedeviltobeexact- are gonna be doing some major nasty, illegal garbage stunt that we will all witness together; people dying because they wanna riot, harm peoples property to the people theirselves, which are, Republicans, Consveratives, to Christians including the 'church'(note; using it loosely because I know they will aim at catholics as well, soo, uhhh..if they burn down a false house of worship be my guest, I am gonna be honest; I don't care, you are practicing pagan acts..- like no, however, i dont wanna see people get harmed, call me a hypocrite if you want to, - makes no sense, because i dont want the people to be killed over this rather just want to see the false churchs go down hill, only in this topic dont try to twist it..forgot to mention, really gotta stop editing posts here, yet, once those false churchs get taken down it can be rebuilt again, but with the people worshipping the real lord not a false one..) - never an edgy moment for these vile things without squaking at the church, because they know as much as us christians know that we're the ones that began the whole thing of protecting babies..just like protecting anybody life out there but that can only extend so much...- meaning if you off hunting people down, and said person defends their self resulting to your death - the church nor anybody else will not defend you on your evil actions. Whatever it maybe, not just abortion but other stuff as well..common sense that everybody knows that if you come knocking to wanting to harm a person they have every right to defend theirself, whether you get offended by this fact or not is up to you.
Laughing aside to giggling from said comment I had made...
Am I gonna be sad, - like my comment on the church if they will be sad about such actions occuring? Heck yeah, that ain't a laughing matter..its serious, and it's depressing stuff. It's bleak, that people wanna go this far..it sucks, it really does but God's in control of everything, so I put my trust - everything on God cause i know the ones that are in that occult will end up turning to christ, not all, but some, and those who do thank you for choosing the light.
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sosauced · 1 year
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maybe you could write more about nyo belarus being a complete and utter degenerate yandere 👉👈 thank you in advance
He’s such a garbage person I love him.
Minors DNI
Heavy hands fall to Nikolai’s side. He can feel that familiar cold, dead feeling rush through his forearms and into his hands as his blood fills his veins again. Having your arms up for so long, holding something so heavy up off the ground can leave you feeling weak.
Having let go of the weight, he looms over the crumpled remains of another man’s body. His adrenaline fades as quickly as it came and suddenly he can feel the sting of the cut across his chest. It’s deep but he hardly notices it anymore. It blends to the rest of the scars covering his body. “Pathetic.” He spits, the wet clump splattering over the man’s blue face.
He expected you to be scared, but when he saw that bottom lip of yours quiver at the sight of him, he felt the torment. “What did you do?” You asked, but Nikolai couldn’t find the words. “Oh god.” You looked sick, you looked like you could vomit from the sight ahead of you at any moment. “He was dangerous. He got up and was following you I couldn’t just let him-“ he was cut off by your shriek. “you’re fucking dangerous!” Those words cut deeper than the man, lying dead on the floor, could ever cut him. “I’m not, I’m not dangerous, I’d never hurt you.”
“Who even are you?” That’s right. It suddenly dawned on him. He spent so much time watching you, only engaging in small ways that he never took the time to think that you didn’t know him. That was fixable.
You struggled so hard, your tears filling your eyes to the brim, large streaks of the salty liquid fell down your cheeks as Nikolai pressed his body into your, your back pinned to the wall behind you, his knee trapping your legs apart from each other. He leaned over your shorter frame. “I did it to save you. Calm down.” He sneered, almost annoyed at the commotion you were making but when you let loose a scream, his gloved hand grabbed your wrists and dragged them over your head. His other hand covered your mouth. “Calm. Down.” He demanded, his icy blue eyes locked with yours. As you breathed deeply through your nose, you whimpered as his hand grabbed your cheeks tightly. “Don’t you think you should say thank you?” He muttered, his gaze following the tears that coated your eyelashes. He’s in awe of your effortless allure. He can feel his heart rate pick back up, his urge to touch you becoming stronger with every passing moment. “I’m going to take my hand off your mouth. Don’t scream.” The fear in your face said it all, you wouldn’t make a sound. Such a good girl for him. His hand slipped off your mouth, he caught the leather glove on his hand between his teeth and pulled his long, slender fingers from them. You shake and tremble as you watch him, watching as he glances from your eyes to your reddened lips. His ring and middle fingers slipped between your lips, the tips of his fingers running over your tongue. “So warm.” Nikolai hummed. His eyes practically rolling to the back of his head as he felt up your wet mouth. You gag and cough as he slides them too far to the back of your throat. Nikolai’s elated, you can tell from the blush tinting his cheeks.
The man who, using his pure strength, held a man up and choked him til he lost his life, was thrusting his fingers in your mouth. He smirked to himself and bit his lip. You were being violated by him. Only him. He was the only one allowed to touch you, look at you, talk to you, breathe the same air as you, smell you…only him, this stranger who fell in love…no, this sick twisted attraction to you. You were too scared of him to fight back any more. “You’re such a good girl.” His body relaxed, leaning over you in a more comfortable posture. Your lips latched around his fingers and he practically moaned. “That’s my girl.” His chest rises and falls quickly, but his expression is cool as he watches you suck at his skin. “My girl.”
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oxydiane · 1 year
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‘He probably just needs some alone time,’
‘He’s had enough alone time for the past two months in that Muggle garbage can of a house! I’m going.’ Says Sirius, shaking Remus’ hand away from his shoulder and turning to the door.
‘Sirius, please, I believe he’s still pretty shaken by Cedric Diggory’s death, maybe—‘
‘We shouldn’t have left him to cope all on his own, yeah, maybe there’s that!’ He bellows, angrily existing the room and climbing the stairs to where Harry had stormed off earlier.
When Sirius knocks on the door of Harry’s assigned room, no replies come and at the risk of getting yelled at all over again, Sirius slowly twists the doorknob and makes his way in.
The room is empty.
He looks around, bed untouched and trunk still closed tightly, before exiting the room and checking every door nearby; heart now racing, irrational fear clouding his mind.
He stops in front of the bathroom entrance, the door ajar just so he gets to hear laboured breath coming from inside and watch Harry where he stands, in front of the mirror, both hands clutching the sink so hard his knuckles are white.
Just as Sirius is about to make his presence known, an awful voice fills the air and with a pang to his chest he realises it’s the mirror. The damn Black-bewitched rubbish.
‘Oh noo, what’s that? Can’t you save everyone anymore?’ Mirror-Harry speaks and pure malice drips from his voice. ‘You know what that means. There really isn’t anything special about you.’
Harry looks up, right into his reflection’s green, evil eyes. God, Sirius never thought he would ever associate that green to evil.
‘You’re just some kid with a stupid scar.’ Is the last thing Mirror-Harry gets to say before Harry throws a punch at the mirror, left hand still clutching the sink while his right fist shakes, bleeding from the shards of glass.
‘Oh god,’ Sirius breathes out, not caring about hiding his presence anymore and Harry jumps as if caught red-handed.
‘Sorry, I’m sorry, please don’t—‘ he starts, voice frantic, almost begging but Sirius doesn’t register any of those words as he runs up to Harry and takes his right hand in both of his.
‘You idiot,’ Sirius mutters, gently picking out the biggest shards. ‘Come down, we need to heal this.’
Harry doesn’t move. ‘You’re not…’ His words are tentative, almost careful and unbelieving. ‘You’re not mad?’
‘Mad? Don’t be ridiculous, Harry, I’d never be mad at you.’
‘But the— the mirror—‘
‘You think I’d care about a stupid mirror more than my Godson? Come, we can… I can heal you, and then we can have some tea and a talk.’
Harry nods silently. As they make their way downstairs, Sirius makes a mental list of all the things he needs to address to both Harry and the Order.
When he feels Harry’s arms wrap around his middle and his face rest against his shoulder, still silent, eyes wet, he almost forgets it.
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ohanny · 7 months
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dangerous romance: main couple mania ep. 1
so i love how sailom's instroduction is this is a budgeting king, in debt eating stolen rice porridge. he has a very pre-kinn broke ass porsche-chay dynamic with his brother (?) which is very sweet and also means it won't last five minutes.
oh okay so we get this ship sailing with a wall slam and a classic "do you understand my father funds your scholarship you poor piece of trash" and alksdflkfj
i know i am supposed to see sailom as the victim but he is like full on pete-ing this. he never breaks eye contact. he is like daring kanghan to escalate with his entire body and kanghan did not just go full "since you're my class mate i will be generous and forgive you if you get down on your knees" like that is a) spicy as fuck what the hell and b) going to backfire so hard
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HE DID NOT JUST BOW 90 DEGREES JUST TO SPIT ON KANGHAN'S SHOES AND WALK AWAY WITH A SMIRK
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he is puzzled by both sailom's actions and by what is happening inside his uniform shorts
honestly, kanghan is the villain here but i struggle to take him seriously as the bad guy because perth a) always looks like he is about five seconds away from bursting into tears and b) has bangs that form a literal heart. no matter how nasty kanghan tries to be - and he tries a lot - the inherent bitch baby-ness just shines through.
literal heart bangs what did i say
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this entire car shop sequence is just pure gold for so many reasons. 1. kanghan shows up in his business leather pants looking like he walked off the set of enhypen's blessed-cursed music video and he's driving a mercedes. like honestly, with all that talk i was expecting a lamborghini. 2. sailom's boss actually like... needing some evidence instead of just bending over backwards to please a rich client 3. sailom fucking uno reversing that credit card sneak and humiliating kanghan with the smuggest lil good boy smile and THAT is why chimon is the ultimate snake-cat like he has a face made for scheming.
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i am really loving sailom because he keeps his head, is really resourceful and will not take any shit. boy does not hesitate to drag this bastard for filth every chance he gets, beating kanghan in his own game without ever stepping down from the high road.
ooh, we are meeting kanghan's family and they are... both not as trash but also as trash as i expected? like i kinda thought more mafia vibes but if laws of attraction - and real life - has taught me anything it is that politicians are garbage.
on the surface his dad seems almost a jolly good fellow but the conversation with this random girl just confirmed there is something so much darker lurking under the surface. as much as it hurts to have a hyper critical parent, having one who has seemingly completely given up on you can be just as bad.
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he's basically been called stupid twice in under five minutes. someone save him.
sailom will not be fooled by a shady ass phone call and neither will he leave a friend behind. this boy will not be distracted by tits with a side of toast. he is a man on a mission.
the way i gasped when i saw this court set up and i have so many questions. do the students just have a cardboard gotham in the basement or - based by the fact we see loose boxes and a shopping cart - did kanghan build this just to prove how big his dick is to sailom ???
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chimon's acting is honestly a+ and he is carrying this show. the tension! the absolute rage that is bleeding through! the way he doesn't have to go big with gestures and expressions to convey everything sailom is feeling perfectly - and not just that. you know what sailom is feeling AND you can see his brain working.
kanghan, sweetie, you might want to take a moment and reflect on your obsession with getting this boy out of his clothes and making him kneel.
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not gonna lie, i kinda saw this move coming because tropes but god was it satisfying :D the reactions of kanghan and sailom's friends are hilarious (10/10 i am evil tea, he totally ships it) and then the camera pans and you can see all these bystanders just standing stock still, filming giving major horror movie vibes and aaaaaaah
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side notes:
i love how his best friend is just "auto." like his parents were "we are poor, naming the kid a vehicle will be fine. no need to bring brands into it."
auto's mom is an actual queen
the teachers are so fucking infuriating but also, that is kind of a sad truth? even when it's not like RICH rich people involved. like for too many adults, it is easier to it off as kids being kids and boys being boys over having to deal with the why and the parents and the drama of it all.
i was bullied in school so like this bubble tea waterboarding makes me feel some type of way? like some of the bullying is very oof-spicy-trope but a lot of it is actually cruel and i really wouldn't recommend this show to anyone who gets triggered by stuff like school violence.
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Wait, what Nessian hike scene? I quit reading after acomaf…
Oh God so this is going to be long but it makes zero sense without the bonkers context: in the Nessian book (book 4, Court of Silver Flames) there is this bass ackwards subplot invented to make sure Feyre can't solve the plot - SJM says, "Oh, Feyre - the 22 year old who learned to read last year - is pregnant by her 530 year old husband and so she can't fight!! 🥰💕🥰😌😌 Isn't this lovely?"
Except - and I am not joking this is all explained in EXCRUICIATING DETAIL - Feyre and Rhysand were having sex while Feyre was shape-shifting into an Illyrian and now the baby has wings. Apparently shape-shifting changes your entire DNA. And Illyrian women have pelvic bones shaped to carry winged babies but High Fae dont. Because Feyre and Rhys had wings while they banged, the baby has wings. And this is VERY DANGEROUS. So dangerous that Feyre cannot use any of her powers - cant shift back to the appropriate bone structure for the baby. The pregnancy could rip Feyre apart from the inside. They CANNOT do a c-section - they are extremely firm and insistent on this. Feyre is absolutely going to die if she continues the pregnancy to full term. The birth will be SUPER DANGEROUS.
And Rhysand just decides that Feyre doesn't need to worry her pretty little head about this information. He tells the details to every single person in the Inner Circle because he is just so SO worried about his darling Feyre...
But yeah she definitely doesn't need to know medical information about her pregnancy so that she can make informed desicions and choices of her own!! Who needs to make choices of your own free will when you have Rhysand amiright!?!?
Anyway Rhys and the whole Inner Circle have been treating Nesta like absolute scum and garbage because she has PTSD and isn't grieving in a nice, pretty way like Feyre or Elain. Nesta is self medicating with casual sex and copious amounts of booze and doesn't want to spend time with people who hate her (ie, the Inner Circle) so they get super salty and decide to tear down the apartment where Nesta is living, force her to move to the House of Wind with Cassian, who at this point has nothing positive to say abut Nesta except that she looks hot when she's starving herself, and order her to train as a warrior even tho Nesta has repeatedly expressed that she has zero interest in fighting as a soldier. They explain that she's EMBARRASSING to the Night Court and Feyre exclaims, "How can I have any right to rule if I can't control my own sister?"
Yeah.
So anyway Nesta is pissed as fuck about this after several hundred pages of MacGuffin Hunting and decides that it's wrong for Rhysand to be such a manipulative fucking control freak about their lives so she tells Feyre (correctly) that Rhysand doesn't really respect her because if he respected her, he'd tell her how dangerous her pregnancy really is.
Now we get to the hiking scene. Brace yourself because it's about to be gnarly as fuck:
So Nesta has spilled the beans. Feyre gets very sad and starts to cry like a little girl - which, for all intents and purposes, she is because SJM chose this book to make Feyre weirdly "pure" and innocent and a beacon of goodness and light. Weird choice given that Feyre is canonically willing to murder literally anyone who gets in the way of what she wants for her future, but whatever.
Seeing her sister cry makes Nesta extremely upset and triggers her to start having an absolute breakdown. The book so far has been full of passages describing Nesta's feelings of worthlessness, her lack of self-esteem, and the way she desperately needs to control some aspect of her life (drinking, having as much sex as possible with complete strangers, having rituals to lock her door and take baths because these things are insanely triggering for her) because all of her choices and autonomy are constantly being stripped from her. She fears now that Feyre will hate her, because she was angry when she revealed the truth - so Feyre won't hear the truth, but will hear Nesta's fury, and at last, her little sister will hate her for good. Their relationship may now be ruined.
However, instead of Feyre and Nesta having a heart to heart a la ACOTAR and instead of them collecting Elain and fucking off from the Night Court for good - Feyre runs crying to Rhysand, who gets so incredibly fucking angry with Nesta for... revealing the fact that he lied to his wife about her own pregnancy.
Rhysand orders Cassian to get Nesta out of Velaris, "Or I'll fucking kill her."
Actual line. From the text.
Now, idk if you've guessed by now, but Cassian is actually Nesta's love interest for this book! Spoiler alert, but they turn out to be mates!!! So what is Cassian, the most alpha of all the very alpha very sexy Bat Boys, going to do when some random ass guy who is smaller than him threatens his mate?
Nothing.
Actually, I lied - Cassian obeys Rhysand unquestioningly. Zero instincts with regards to protecting his mate, whom he is supposed to be falling in love with, whom he is supposed to respect. He takes Nesta out of the city and thinks about how fucking angry he is with her, how mean and awful and cruel she is for... telling Feyre - again, correctly!!!!! - that Rhysand doesn't respect her as an equal and that her pregnancy is dangerous. He decides that he's going to punish Nesta by forcing her to hike across the mountains! He and Rhysand have a good little mental chuckle about this. Haha, Nesta hates hiking and being in nature, she'll be so miserable, but she totally deserves this for being a nasty evil person who we dislike. :)
During this conversation when Cassian decides to physically punish Nesta for acting out, also, it's revealed that Feyre is TOTALLY fine with the fact that Rhysand kept details about pregnancy secret from her. It totally doesn't matter that he lied to her and removed her agency and her ability to make informed decisions about her own life and body. He always has good intentions and just overreacted out of his overwhelming love for her, and who is Tamlin, again? What was the issue with him supposed to be? Anyway, I forget! Who cares!? Feysand baby is a go, they're going to name him Nyx <3
Cassian and Nesta are now hiking. Nesta is neither eating nor drinking, even though they are literally marching up and down multiple mountain peaks. For days, Cassian does not speak to Nesta except to bark orders at her about where to stop for the night, and to wake her up in the morning. Nesta rapidly spirals, thinking about how she's in pain and how much she deserves this, since she's a hateful person who has ruined every relationship she's ever had, so it's fine if she dies.
Cassian thinks, "Huh, Nesta's awfully quiet. Weird. She's probably preparing to yell at me again, she's such a bitch."
But then he notices how little she's eating, and how hard she's pushing herself despite her being much physically weaker than him, and he wonders if she's trying to kill herself.
He doesn't react to this insight, and continues marching her across the mountains until Nesta quite literally passes out from exhaustion.
Cassian is now somewhat worried - he's still angry at her, though, and yells at her that she should have been drinking more water.
Soulmates, everybody!
Anyway, once Nesta is revived, they have a heart-to-heart... sort of. Nesta tells him how worthless she feels, and how she genuinely believes she deserves what is happening to her. She thinks that she deserves cruelty, and is completely un-loveable, because she couldn't forgive her father for neglecting them as children and he still went out to die for them. Cassian... replies that he once burned down a village because that was where his mom was from and his mom was mistreated. No reaction to any of Nesta's insecurities. He doesn't reassure her, or tell her that he loves her no matter what, or that her pain doesn't define her worth as a person. He tells her that the best time to be a nice person was yesterday, and the second best time is today. Then he gives her a sword and tells her to start her training up. They have sex by a lake.
Ta-da! Nesta is now cured of her PTSD.
That's the hiking chapter! And while I'm at it -
At the end of the book, Cassian has never once admitted to liking Nesta as a person on the page - oh, he loves having crazy sex with her and her huge boobs, but he still kinda thinks she's an unreasonable bitch - and Nesta has gotten on her knees to apologize to the Inner Circle for being inconvenient and mean to them. Nobody ever apologies for calling Nesta worthless, or telling her she ought to be thrown into a dungeon in the Court of Nightmares, or for tearing down her house, or chasing her out of Velaris. Nesta sacrifices her vaguely defined powers to save the Feysand baby. And they all live happily ever after.
I rarely call out authors directly but I hope this long ass post explains my very deep and special personal hatred for SJM. She wrote a "healing arc" for Nesta which involved her being physically beaten into submission and molded into a "nicer" person for the Inner Circle's convenience. I have never read anything more fucking disgusting than Court of Silver Flames.
Tldr: You quit while you were head anon, and I'm proud of you.
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jessicas-pi · 9 months
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I Am A Little Addicted To The Incorrect Quote Maker.
Anyway. Twin Blades And Beskar (Lifeswap) AU?
Inquisitor: Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the galaxy! Kanan: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment. Sabine: More or less, I guess... Ahsoka: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that! Ezra: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept. Hera: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!
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Sabine: My aesthetic is "would be suspected of witchcraft by small town citizens."
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Ahsoka: Throw lamps at people who need to lighten up, and throw handles at someone who needs to get a grip. Kanan: Throw a refrigerator at someone who needs to chill. Sabine: Throw scissors at someone who needs to cut it out! Hera: Throw a clock at someone who needs to get with the times! Okadiah: Throw matches at someone who needs to get fired up! Ezra: Throw a brick at someone to kill them!
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Ahsoka, making coffee: This is going to fix everything.
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Sabine: Rules were made to be broken. Kanan: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken. Ahsoka: Uh, piñatas. Chopper: Glow sticks. Ezra: Karate boards. Hera: Spaghetti when you have a small pot. Sabine: Rules. Kanan:
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Ezra: I hope no one lowkey hates me. Ezra: Highkey hate me. Hate me with every fiber of your being. Ezra: Go big or go home.
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Chopper: Drink your school, stay in sleep, don't do milk, and get 8 hours of drugs.
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Hera: Just be yourself. Sabine: Really? Hera, I have one day to win over Ezra’s clan! Sabine: How long did it take for you guys to like me? Okadiah: Couple of weeks. Kanan: Six months. Chopper: Jury’s still out. Sabine: See Hera? ‘Just be yourself,’ what kind of garbage advice is that?!
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Okadiah: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life. Ahsoka: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back… Hera: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this. Ezra: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years. Kanan: I knew I lost that potential somewhere. Sabine: Mental stability, my old friend! Okadiah: Force, could you lighten up a little?
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Ezra: Of course I have a lot of pent-up rage, you fool! I've been the same height since I was twelve!
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Okadiah: If you got arrested what would be the charges? Ahsoka: Theft. Hera: Disturbing the peace. Kanan: Aggravated assault. Sabine: Arson. Ezra: All of the above. In that order, probably.
---
Ezra: So, what’s Sabine's type? Kanan: Awkward, overprotective, oblivious, terrible sense of humor, Mandalorian. Ezra: Sounds kind of like me. Too bad she loathes me. Kanan: Did I mention oblivious? Ezra: Yeah, why? Kanan: Just making sure.
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Sabine: If I die, you can have what little I own. Ezra: Wait. What do you mean "if" you die? Sabine: My unending existence is fuelled by pure spite, that of which the painful experiences of life have rendered me full. Ezra: Ezra: *Sighs* Let me call your Master again.
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Chopper: All of your existences are confusing. The Spectres: How so? Chopper: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.
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Kanan: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier. Kanan: Violently pilots. Hera: Violently lightsaber trains. Ahsoka: Violently sleeps. Sabine: Violently raises the dead. Ezra: Violently murders people. Okadiah: Violently worries about the previous two statements.
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Sabine: Sometimes I wonder if I’m hearing voices. Sabine: Then I remember that’s the last bit of sanity I have trying to get me to fall asleep at a reasonable time.
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*The squad's reaction to being told they're the chosen one* Hera: I will not let you down. Ahsoka: Sounds fun. Kanan: K. Sabine: Like kriff I am. Okadiah: Do I have to be? Ezra: Please manda I am so tired
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*after a perilous life-or-death escape/rescue* Sabine: Oh, gods, I could just kiss you right now. Ezra: ... Ezra: Neat. *later* Ezra, lying face down on his bunk: I said "Neat," Kanan. Who says neat? It's not neat to say neat but I said it anyways because I'm kriffing stupid. Kanan, reading a book: Don't beat yourself up too much, kid. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Did Oke ever tell you what I did when Hera confessed her love for me? Ezra: Didn't you thank her? Kanan: *closes the book and looks at the ceiling* I thanked her.
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Kanan: I have met some of the most insufferable people. But they also met me.
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Ezra: Capitalizing every word in a sentence is vomit inducing. Sabine: Enjoy Your Trip To Puke Land, Boy!
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Hera: I think my guardian angel drinks.
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Ezra: The only thing I'm guilty of is being adorable... ...and also assault with a deadly weapon.
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Sabine, at the slightest provocation: I came into this galaxy screaming and covered in someone else's blood and I'm not afraid to leave the same way.
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sehodreams · 2 months
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She’s midas. Everything she touches, turns for the better. When she sees him smoking in the balcony, she saunters over, sliding the glass door to the cold night. Her hand works fast to snatch the thin cigarette out of his lips, but his hand is even faster retrieving the “stick of cancerous garbage” as she likes to call it.
“Put it out,” she demands, holding her hand out for him to comply with her wishes.
He places the practically new cigarette back between his lips, inhaling its smoke deeply and holding it like a warm blanket around his lungs. He makes quick work of dropping the cigarette and stomping out the orange embers.
She looks at him expectantly. Expecting a ‘thank you’ for saving him from the cruel grip of lung cancer.
He reaches a large hand under her chin, raising her gaze so that he can see the purity and innocence in her bright eyes.
She starts, “You’re wel-“
He leans down, capturing her lips in between his and exhaling the toxic smoke into her pretty lungs. 
He’s the kiss of death. Everything he touches, rots.
🌒 It's a riize corruption concept i had in mind. i dont have anywhere else to share this. you can react to it, remix it, make it your own, ignore it...
Girl this is amazing go and write a fanfic PLEASE.
I've been dying for a riize corruption concept, I know my designated boy for it is Seunghan but I have been thinking about Eunseok so much lately.
A girl that has always lived in an overprotective environment moves away for college and everything comes to her in a rush. She's trying to fit in with her classmates that all they talk about is boys and dates when she hasn't even had a proper conversation with a boy her age, going around lost and overwhelmed from all the new topics she knows nothing about.
To her luck her cute neighbor is taking a like in her because she's nice and sometimes gives him food when she cooks more than needed, so he decides to not taint her, but help her with little things. He knows she's still too pure to know about the real world and everything she's able to feel, so he goes slow and teaches her about how to order a decent coffee without stuttering and where to find good music and drinks (not allowing her to drink alone of course). He does his best to not taint her but with every little thing she discovers through him he wants to show her more and more, one day even offering to show her how a kiss is supposed to be, "do you really want to go to your first date without knowing how to kiss? What will you do if he asks you for one? Because he'll notice it, we all do".
And oh god, just this scene that you describe makes me think of the two of them having a late night conversation, but each of them in their own studio apartment. The building is one of those old ones with balconies practically glued together, ugly as hell but perfect for broke students trying to survive in the city. It's usual for him to go and smoke there, and she's reluctant to stay with him at first since her dad always told her to avoid it since it causes cancer, but then Eunseok teaches her that one taste won't kill anyone, making her get used to it, even asking him for a hit every now and then when she's stressed, or he directly passing her the smoke to make her shut up every time she's nervous and can't stop rambling about something that, just like he says to almost everything that makes her nervous, "it's not that deep".
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the-fandom-therapist · 2 months
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(YEP I'M ALREADY DONE, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
As promised, I'm tagging you @ultimateplaylistmaker x) Hope you will enjoy it!
This is my interpretation of their "alicorn Kokichi AU" check it out everyone it's awesome!
It's crack taken seriously btw, I put way too many details and changes, I hope you'll still like it!
Also apologies if anyone is OOC, I never wrote about MLP before x)
That's the first part, mainly Kokichi's, I'll write more about the others! -I stopped because Tumblr was struggling to show all of it lmao, I think I've reach the characters limit-
Death is a bitch.
Wait, no. Death is a dude. Well, bastard then.
The terms of their deal were SIMPLE! He beats the god -at poker you morons, he's not stupid enough to challenge the Grim Reaper at chess, one of the oldest games in history, and apparently one of its personal favorites- and him and all the other idiots from the killing game get brought back to life.
(No he's not attached to any of them. Absolutely not. He just added them so he wouldn't get killed again straight away by that damn assassin. Because without the space idiot to restrain her, she would have gone to kill him again. Anyway, not the point.)
And he fucking did, yes sir! Outsmarted the god of death himself, the grim reaper in person! He's amazing like that. Don't try to fuck with a Supreme Leader of Evil!
Anyway. Point is, he won. He tricked the god of death himself to fold on his turn by pure bluff.
And that was the condition: if he could trick death itself to fold, to give up while he had nothing, then it could recognize his value. Apparently, Death -or Thanatos if he remembers correctly- likes bold humans, so it -he?- have no problem make an exception from time to time. Under conditions obviously.
He didn't had many humans who tried. So every attempts was a welcomed change from the -apparently- frankly boring existence he had.
Hey, he wasn't about to complain, it helped here.
He grabbed his scarf -how the hell did he had it with him when he died without it, no clue, but again let's not look a gift horse in the mouth shall we?- and thought of his team. He'll see them soon.
He was already starting to feel weird. Like he was being sucked out of his own... body? Probably Death doing his thing.
However, right before things turned to black, he could have sworn he heard a "wait shit-" and saw a panicked expression on the god's face.
Huh. Wonder what that means...
~0o0~
The first thing he registered was the smell.
A foul smell, and one he knew well, considering he'd not always been hanging with DICE in the most sanitary places.
Garbage. his mind helpfully provided.
Wow, fuck you too Death. Really, too much honor!
He scoffed, and started to get up wobbly. Waking up from dying was... weird. His head was killing him -ah!- same for his sides.
When he tried to get up from the ground, he barely made one step before falling back on all four. And...
Wait a second.
WAIT. A. SECOND.
That's not a hand. That's a damn hoof! What the hell?
A quick check up confirmed that yup. He's a horse now. Everything's fine.
Oh and he have wings too. Because why not.
What the hell did Death do?! Wait. Didn't he acted surprised before he passed out?
...Did the god of fucking DEATH made a mistake?
How do you even fuck up that badly? He's human for fuck's sake! Now he's a horse?! (Well technically a pegasus he guesses.)
Alright. Focus Kokichi. Freak out later. Right now you need to know where in the world you are.
At least he still have his scarf. Which... thank god (clearly not Death.) it helps a bit to have something familiar.
Alright. Now that he more or less put himself back under control, he needed to exit that damn alleyway... He could already feel a headache. Gre-
Hold up. There something on his head too.
Great, now what?
...That felt like a... horn or some sort.
What, so he's both a fucking unicorn and a pegasus now? That's a thing?
Does Death have fursonas or...? Actually, that could be an interesting question.
But that's not the time for this.
Right now he needed to hide. He heard voices, and even though he couldn't understand the fuck they were saying -great, he wasn't even in Japan? That wasn't a language he recognized either.- he could hear the dangerous tone they had.
So that's what he did! He bolted under a pile of trash, not caring about the smell. And he saw...
...Are those supposed to be horses too? They... looked like a mix of horse and bugs.
Not thinking of the Insect Meet and Greet. Bad idea. Not thinking of Gonta's execution either. Nope. Not doing that.
They were all black, green big buggy-like eyes and wings... Were those fangs? Yikes. He definitely doesn't want to be seen by them... And they have holes in them? Shouldn't that hurt?
They were speaking. Something he couldn't understand... But they weren't alone.
There were actual horses with them! But wait.
They were clearly prisoners. Uh oh.
Welp, seems he was right to hide! One point for him. But something was a bit weird too.
Some had horns. Some had wings, and some had neither. But none had both, asides from these... insects-horses bad guys.
Alright.
Clearly he's not in Japan (or on Earth at all) and this place is populate with sentients horses. Or ponies, who cares.
They don't seem to be able to have both a horn and wings. Only these creepy bug-horses seem to. And they don't look friendly.
If he want to fit in, he'll need to hide either the wings or the horn. He doesn't want to end up in jail before he can figure a way to go back to his own world.
...The horn would probably be the easiest to hide. He'll just need to lie about why he have something on his head that looks like one.
Easy peasy. He can do this. Hell, he tricked the god of death, he can trick a few horses!
...He'll just need to learn the language. Great.
Also, he needed to find a way to avoid those creepy bug-horses guys. Something tells him that looking like one of their prisoners wouldn't help him there.
But first thing first: find a way to hide that horn. He suppose it's a small mercy that he got thrust in a dumpster. It's easy to find what you want, as long as you know how to look.
Two minutes later he found some sturdy papers and got to work. With hooves it wasn't easy, but he had all the time in the world.
~0o0~
...He's pretty sure he passed a good hour on it. But it was done! It was clearly not in the best condition, but at least it hid the horn efficiently -it was a hassle to put the rubber band around something on his head with hooves, but he did it. It wouldn't do to have his cover getting blown away by the wind!- and would stay in place.
While he was working, he kept hearing some words in particular. They sounded like names?
And it thankfully made him learn that even if he couldn't understand what the FUCK those bug-horses were saying, he could at least understand the normal ponies. (Probably because he's one too.) Phew.
"Celestia" "Cadence" "Chrysalis" were the words he kept hearing in those creepy guys' language. Also there was the same word in front of the first two names, the third one had another word.
Considering the normal horses were calling the first two "princess", he could understand Chrysalis was probably the leader of those bug-horses.
Sounds like girl's names either way, so if the first two were princesses, the last one must be a queen, and probably an enemy if what he was seeing was any indication.
Anyway, that wasn't important. What was, was to find a way to avoid these... bug-horses things. (He's pretty sure he heard the horses -or ponies they were rather small- call them something like "Changelings"? Whatever that means.)
However, when he thought about that, he had an odd feeling. It was like his body was telling him "big thing's coming towards us captain!" And when he went to -discreetly duh- check, he was greeted with a white light which was sweeping those Changelings and send them flying far away from here, leaving the horses alone.
...Well damn. He suppose he didn't had to worry about those now. That's one thing taken cared of.
Now he could use that diversion to get the hell away from here! It was a good time to learn if he could run like this.
Running... to somewhere. Away from this place at least. It have a big castle nearby, and he's going to bet there's a ruler in there. Probably those princesses. And he does NOT want to be near the persons -or horses in that case- that can put him to jail.
Next, he need to find a way to get something to eat. Because he's plently good at picking pockets, but usually he have two human hands for this!
That also leave the problem of figuring the currency... Urgh. All that reasoning hurt his head.
First thing first. Waiting for the night to fall. It's easier to walk in the shadows -even if looked to be a rather light shade of purple- that way. And apparently, there was a wedding going on? Perfect. Everyone will be too busy with that to notice someone hanging around.
Maybe he could steal a few things along the way before buying supplies to perform in the streets and gain more money legally. Because while he doesn't mind stealing, if he get caught he doesn't have his team here to bust him out...
DICE...
Raah, enough self-pity! He have a world to figure out!
With a slap on his face -or rather, a punch...- he started to run forwards. After a few struggles, he was able to run like he didn't learned like, five minutes ago, and he setted off.
~0o0~
The adventage with big cites, was that no matter how odd you may look, nobody will pay enough attention to retain your face. Because why should they? You're just another person passing by.
That's how he successful picked the pockets of a few horses without anyone noticing. Seems like even in this world the riches were dumb! And here he was, worried that with hooves he'd struggle.
He hid his treasure in his scarf. Regrouped the coins in one wallet and-
And holy shit were those gold coins?!
Kokichi knew they looked rich, but he never thought they'd literally carry GOLD on their person like that!
...Something was clearly fishy here. It looked too good to be true.
Aaaaaaaand he was proven right. Goddamnit. Apparently gold didn't had the same value here, if buying only a few pastries costed two or three golden coins!
...He really hoped he could ask the prices directly, because if he have to dicipher any writing he's screwed.
Because apparently, even if he could understand the language, he couldn't read it! Damn it. Back to first grade he goes, having to relearn how to read! Just his luck.
Hmmmm.
Entering a shop and interacting without knowing any of the mannerisms of the ponies would be a bad idea. He was lucky the shops there stayed opened the full night thanks to that wedding (a royal wedding even, damn. One of those princesses?) but if it's to blow his cover, it's stupid.
Maybe he could pretend to be deaf? That could work. He just hope they don't have a sign language here, otherwise he's fucked.
He eyed the shop (it had a jester's hat for a roof. That's clearly the place he needed to go to!) and took a deep breath.
Alright! Time to see if he's as good as an actor as he was when still human!
~0o0~
He pushed the door to be greeted by a cheerful pony behind the counter (he's going to call them ponies because they are seriously smaller than horses, all of them.)
"Welcome, welcome! Are you searching to prank your friends? You are at the right place! We have everything, from fake flowers to- um, boy?"
Well, sorry random pony but he have to pretend he can't hear you. So he just looked at the shelves with a lost expression.
"Um hello?"
Nope.
The cashier was probably puzzled. Eh, sorry. But well, he needs to be safe here!
Once he noticed what he needed, he grabbed the deck of cards -with his teeth, not like he had any other options...- before going to the register. The pony was clearly confused, but he still tried to keep a smile on.
"Ah, found your treasure? It's gonna be two golds!"
Now... Action!
He pretended to be confused for a second. Then he widdened his eyes, before putting a hoof at his ear -that still felt SO weird- and then shook his head.
And thankfully, the cashier seemed to understand, thank fuck.
"Oh! Alright, hold on!"
He went to rumminaged behind the counter and put a paper and a pen. Then he started to doodle two coins, and pointed to the deck of cards.
Alright then! It worked. Phew.
Also, it looked like a gold is really just a golden coin. That's a mystery solved at least. He nodded, before putting the wallet from his scarf, and taking out two coins that he put on the counter.
He got a bag out of this, and his deck of cards.
And a bunch of informations too. Apparently ponies are way less ableists than humans! That guy literally went "alright please wait" when he pretended to be deaf.
He grinned. Oh he's going to abuse of it so much.
Now though, he had a stand to settle... But later.
He's tired, and he's been there for a long time. The day was even not so long away from rising, so he thinks he should settle for the night.
Since he can keep the deaf act, he could probably find a room. Probably. If not, he'll just find a dark corner and sleep there. Not the first time he slept outside after all!
~0o0~
Finding a room was easy. So yay for him!
Falling asleep on the other hand, was not.
Let's put asides the few attempts he had to do to find a comfortable position as a pony to lay into okay. Their bed weren't different from humans, and it wasn't that hard.
However, sleep meant nightmares for him.
Really, that was expected. He struggled enough to sleep on a daily basis -what do you know, killing games are bad for your mental health! Shocker. Who would have guessed- so with the whole mess that happened with his death, that was even worse.
Everytime he closed his eyes, it's to reopen them in the hangar. And while being human again would be great, reviving his own death isn't synonym of good dreams.
He gave up sleeping after three times waking up in cold sweat. But hey, apparently that was enough sleep so the sun that was starting to rise was already really high! So midday, or later then that.
He payed for the room and left. Now, to find a place far enough from that town...
~0o0~
He travelled by night, slept in the day, and gathered as much informations as possible.
Apparently the kingdom as a whole was called Equestria -damn really no inspiration uh- and that Celestia princess was ruling over it in the big castle he saw at Canterlot (the capital then) with her little sister Luna. Both responsible for the sun and moon respectively.
Okay so appareltly the celestial bodies aren't moving without help here. All the work of magic. Even the weather was controlled by pegasi.
Actually, maybe he can try to learn how to fly while he's at it, that'd be fun. It's not because he's stuck here -preferably temporary, looking at you Death!- that he can't have a bit of fun while he's at it.
He wonders if that include the others too.
Wait shit.
The others.
They are going to have his head if they learned they'd be brought back as fucking ponies because of him. (In his defense he never wanted that, it's Death's fault!)
But to avoid suspicion on himself, he'd had to also cover their asses. Great. Let's see.
He'll just explain -once he settled somewhere- that him and a group of others were kept prisoners by those Changelings. And when they attacked Canterlot, they brought him and the others with them, to use as hostages if they get caught before they could carry out their plan.
They'd been raised by them, away from ponies since they were toddlers so they don't even have "pony names" (he realized the names here were fucking cheesy, nothing like Japanese names) and now they're just completely lost. And if the others were talking about things that didn't made sense, it was for that reason.
Yup, sounds good! With a few fake tears it'll do the trick perfectly. Now, he just need to find an isolated place to settle.
Also maybe picking a name along the way too. That'd be a good idea to blend in.
Oh wait, does he have to pick one for the others too? He hope not.
Anyway, for now he needed to concentrate on himself first.
~0o0~
...He'd made a HUGE mistake.
He was -apparently, if the ponies' words were to believe- close to a little town called Ponyville (do they really have no inspiration for the names? Come on guys!) so he had decided to shift his sleeping schedule to actual night since he was pretty close.
"Not like that would change much about my dreams" he thought.
Ah! He couldn't have been more wrong.
The nightmare started the same. The usual deaths, and executions, before his-
But when the press was about to come down, he felt something... different.
Pure white energy -that he could recognize as magic now- completely wipe out the hangar out of existence.
Now he was just... In uh... Space? The spaceman'd be thrilled.
He was on a path made of light blue light and white dots... The same thing that was everywhere.
There were doors too, the hell?
"Whomst in Equestria's name art thou?!"
Uh oh.
He turned around -he's so damn glad that in dreams he's human...- and is greeted by-
Wait what?
That's a dark blue mare -definitely taller than most ponies- with... weird space floaty mane.
But the most important thing is that she had both a horn and wings!
How is that possible? He thought only those Changelings guys could-
Wait.
Waaaaaait a minute.
She had what looked to be a crown. And she had a moon... tattoo? On her flank.
Is that the fucking princess of the moon? What is SHE doing here?! Also, how is that possible that she also got both wings and horn-
Oh. Oh no.
That's a fucking status isn't it? Having both. Normal ponies either have one of the two, or neither. Having both must mean being royalty.
...Yeah no. He's keeping that horn HIDDEN. He want to be able to leave this world, not being bond here by duties!
(Besides, the only people he want to lead are his minions. No one else.)
No wonder ponies were looking at him weird! That's like pretending to be royalty!
Let's hope it's not a crime... Wait, if it was he would have been arrested already.
Fuck.
"Answer us!"
Oh whoops. He forgot the princess was still here.
"Gotta go, bu-bye!"
He needs to wake up. He have to. He can't stay here. He have to!
He doesn't know how, he doesn't why, but he successfully woke up after everything around him turned purple.
Now. Now let's think.
He needed to avoid getting the attention of the princess. Considering she didn't intervene until now, he assume that it's because she's only walking in dreams in the night -make sense for the moon princess to be up in the night.
So... He need to keep the noctural schedule. Sleeping in the day, to avoid her. And if he can't, then he need to keep her at bay.
But considering he doesn't know how to use magic, he's going to focus on the first option.
To be able to use magic, he needs training. And to train, he needs books -no way in hell he's asking for help after learning all that mess about royalty- and to be able to understand those books he need to learn how to read.
A hell of a program he have in front of him. Oh well, at least it's gonna keep him busy.
Alright. He needed to go now.
To that town he goes! While expecting to not draw attention.
~0o0~
He arrived at the border of it. There was a rather small and cozy looking cottage here, surrounded by forest. It was midday, the pony probably wasn't hom-
His thoughts were cut off by a high-pitched scream. Probably a girl's voice.
...Great, what now? A scene like this would be hard to settle-
...
There was a yellow pegasus. Pink mane, who was protecting herself (assuming she was the one who screamed) from a bulky earth pony (that's how those who have no wings nor horn were called right?)
The earth pony was really tall, like, two heads more than Kokichi himself. Light green color, dark green tangled mane...
Wait a minute. WAIT A DAMN FUCKING MINUTE.
Red eyes with round glasses, and a bug cage warped around its neck.
It's-
"Gonta so sorry! Gonta not meant to scare horse!"
"GONTA!"
Wow, go him. Yelling his name like that and sprinting in their direction.
That at least got both of their attention. So there's that.
Gokuhara was looking at him with pure confusion. Probably didn't recognized him, which was fair. He was a fucking pony for fuck's sake.
"Uh? Does Gonta know you, horse? Gonta sorry, doesn't know horse with wings..."
"Geez, thanks a lot. he huffed. Can't recognize your leader? So mean! How could you forget about me? he started to sniffled. You're breaking my heart! How could you?!"
The theatrics were apparently enough.
"K-Kokichi?"
"At last! he said, raising a hoof. That's me alright."
"Kokichi is a horse."
"Pony technically, pegasus to be more exact. And you're one too."
"But Gonta die-"
"About that! he cut him off. We need to talk in private. Bu-bye yellow pegasus, sorry for the scare!"
He grabbed Gonta's bug cage's strap and pulled to make the other follow him in a recluse place.
Once far enough, he sighed.
"Alright, just hear me out. I know you're confused as hell, me too. Maybe even mad at me about what happened in the game, I won't blame you for that. But we have other things to worry about: we're not in our world, I think you noticed as much."
"People are horses." nodded Gonta with a serious expression.
"They call themselves ponies, but yeah. There's no human here. There's no killing game either. Monokuma doesn't exist. The Academy either. This world... is more or less peaceful."
"No killing game? he softly asked. No Monokuma?"
"Nope. Nothing. And... Considering we're both here, I'd say everyone who died is also here. Though to find them is going to be complicated..."
The leader pondered for a second. How could they find everyone? It would be best if everyone wasn't far away from each other, if Death comes back for them -and he better!- it'd be quicker to be send back.
"Kokichi died?"
Oh wait. Oops. Right, he forgot Gonta wouldn't know.
"Yup! Right after you in fact. Anyway, not the point-"
"Did Monokuma also punished Kokichi?"
Uh? Why is he asking that?
Oh.
Everyone... Please stop blaming Kokichi now.
...He's still too kind.
"Nope. Maki killed me. he paused. Or rather Kaito. Eh, one of the two. I don't know what finished me off. he shook his hoof. Anyway, not the point. I died, and Kaito also died probably because he was sick. Meaning, everyone who died before you, plus Kaito and myself are probably here."
"E-Everyone?"
"Yup. But we need to recognize them -wouldn't be too hard probably...- and find a cover story."
"Cover story?"
"This world doesn't have a killing game Gonta. That means, if we tell them what happened to us, they won't understand, and that'll bring us problems."
"Oh. Gonta understand. But Gonta doesn't want to lie to them... They look nice."
"Good thing I'm here! Leave the lying part to me. I'm a liar after all! Also we need new names. Because names here aren't like ours. If we want to blend in... Just leave it to me okay?"
The giant just nodded.
The leader just nodded back, before returning to the cottage. Let's hope she's still here and uh... Not freaking out.
~0o0~
...Uh oh.
She called her friends apparently. There were five new ponies all around her. Two unicorns, another pegasus and two earth ponies.
"Hey you two! How dare you scare Fluttershy like that!" yelled the blue pegasus.
"Ah! Gonta sorry! Gonta didn't meant to scare pony!"
Well, here goes the enthomologist, apologizing again. But Kokichi's not going to play that card. He put a hoof in front of the giant and frowned.
"Don't apologize, we don't know if they aren't with them!"
Cue confusion. That's what he want to see!
"W-With them?"
"You know how they are! They can change appearance at will and pretend they're your friend!"
Not a lie. The mastermind was -if what Death told him was true- a master of disguise. The Ultimate Cosplayer after all. And the ponies would probably think of the changelings, which is what he wants.
"Hey! Are you saying we're changelings!"
"And what if I am uh? he grinned. Don't like having the truth in your face?"
"H-Hey now."
Oh? The purple unicorn stopped the blue pegasus. Seems like he found the leader of that little group.
"We aren't changelings. We swear on Celestia's name!"
"And how can we believe you uh? You could be lying!"
There. That was the cue for Gonta normally...
"They don't smell like changelings..." he mumbled.
"You should listen to your friend! We're not changelings! We fought them!"
Now, to pretend to be hesitant.
"Are you sure?" he asked the enthomologist.
Gonta nodded, and he pretended to scratch his head -while leaving the papers around his horn alone- with confusion.
"I think we all started on the wrong hoof. gently said the purple one. You are at Ponyville, you're safe! There's no changelings here."
"Why did you thought there were some in the first place? Changelings don't live here. We kicked their butts not so long ago!"
"Rainbow Dash! You're not helping. she smiled at them. Sorry about my friend, she's very straightforwards. How about we talk somewhere else, around pastries?"
"Oh oh! the pink one started to jump happily. I'll go prepare them! I'll be right back!"
And she left... by jumping? Why not.
Alright.
Time to bluff the hell out of this conversation.
~0o0~
...It had been stupidly easy. He explained to them that Gonta and him were part of a group of ponies who got abducted when they were toddlers by changelings, got raised by them, humiliated, turned around each other et cetera... Got brought along at the assault on Canterlot, and since the white energy who yeeted the changelings didn't hurt them, they ended up here, and don't know what to do or where to go.
That's how he learned that the wedding that took place was the purple one's (Twilight Sparkle apparently. Still cheesy, yup.) brother's, and they were here, and were also fighting the changelings.
And apparently that wave of magic was from the love between the bride and groom.
Ew. They didn't ended up at Equestria, they ended up at "Cheesy Land". But he still noted the information.
When they asked about why the hell he got a fake horn, he explained that it was to be less beaten by changeling. After all, they have both horn and wings, so he thought if he looked like them they would leave him alone. Not that it worked. -The fact that it was curved helped his story. But come to think of it why is his curved and not everyone else's? Not even the princesses' are curved. Weird.) Now though he just keep it because it's the symbol of the princesses and that's pretty cool! After all it was one of them that indirectly freed him and the others from the changelings' grasp. He's pretending to be like them! (they had no idea how true that statement was.)
That was way too easy to make them believe that with fake tears. Even Gonta tried to comfort him even though he knew it was fake (though it was probably to make it more believable. Gonta is a lot of things, but an idiot isn't one of them.)
"But then... You don't have names?" asked the other unicorn -Rarity if he remembers correctly.
"We have the ones the changelings gave us. he said, wiping the tears with his hoof. Mine's Kokichi Oma. he pointed to Gonta. His is Gonta Gokuhara. But those aren't real ponies' names."
"That's true..." Twilight seemed thoughtful.
"Oh oh! Maybe we can pick some for you!" the pink one said, with a smile that reminded him a bit too much of Angie.
"...I'd prefer choosing my own thanks."
"Of course! Pinkie, let them chose... Once it's done, we'll ask the mayor to put you in the records." Twilight said.
"That'd be nice. Also... If you find someone with a weird name, that's probably a friend of ours."
Not really true, but he needed to find those idiots as quickly as possible.
"I'll pass the word at Clousdale!"
Aaaaaand the blue one was already gone.
"I'll ask around the farm if anyone saw a lost pony." the orange one nodded, tipped her hat and left.
"I'll send a letter at Princess Celestia too. the purple unicorn nodded towards the... dragon? at her side. In the meantime, do you have ideas of names? Also, what are your talents?"
Talents? That's easy- oh wait.
"What do you mean by talent?" he asked, raising a hoof to stop Gonta from talking.
Translation: is that the same thing as their Ultimates?
"Oh. Yeah, I suppose the changelings wouldn't do that... she mumbled to herself. Something you are really good at? You both have your cutie marks so..."
What the fuck is that now. (Also, cheesy, the return.)
"Oh! Gonta is an enthomologist!"
He saw Fluttershy -that's her name right?- perking up from behind Rarity.
"Oh that's great! she turned towards him. And you?"
"I guess you can call me a trickster. he smirked. I prank people. And trick them. a pause. Mainly changelings though."
A lie but hey.
"If Gonta's talent is "Enthomology" you could call mine "tricky dice"." he shrugged.
But that question of names... He needed to find one. And Gonta too.
"Hey Gonta, how about "Baron Buzz" for you? Sounds good?"
"Oh! Gonta not mind this. Gonta likes it!"
"Well, that's settled then. Mine now..."
He think again.
Let's see their situation.
He got attributs that could get him royal duties, which is problematic. He needs to hide it...
He made a deal with Death and no one need to know about that. To get everyone back to life, but also to fuck with miss mastermind too while he's at it.
He grinned.
"Call me Royal Collusion then!"
That's when both Rainbow Dash and the farmer came back.
"I found a pegasus that looks really lost, and he calls himself Kaito... something."
"I found a small guy that call himself Ryoma!" added the other.
Oh. Well that was quick.
"They're with us alright. You're coming Gonta? Let's get Ryoma back first."
"Hm hm!"
First they get the depressed tennis player back, then the astridiot.
Welp, they got a pretty nice program ahead of them it seemed.
"Then let's go."
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little-svt · 1 year
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GENDER-NEUTRAL | FLUFF
Wc: 845
Taglist: @sweetiehyuka @pastel-princess-please @kiki-woo @fishsquishh
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Yum Yum
“Oh my god, that’s potent!”, you coughed, covering your nose with your sleeve as you latched your apartment door behind you. You could already hear your boyfriends deep chuckle, taunting you from the kitchen. Unloading your bag onto the sofa and kicking off your shoes, you reluctantly wandered into the kitchen to find your favorite sight;
Your 187 cm boyfriend, giddily cooking up something in his silly, frilly apron you’d gotten him for your anniversary.
“Is it edible?”, you asked, peaking around at the large bowl of spice loaded kimchi Mingyu was prepping in front of him.
“I was craving extra spicy, this time.”, he giggled, pulling a piece from the bowl and teasing you with it. The way you flinched backwards made him laugh even hard. You only wanted to get hit in the eye with chili exactly zero times.
“Not even one little nibble?”, he pouted obnoxiously, knowing his puppy look could easily coax you into eating out of his hand even if it was pure garbage he was offering. Though, it never was. That was one of your favorite things about him and he about you. The way he would cook and feed you, the way you ate anything he made happily. It was a perfect five and take love language that time had developed for you.
Groaning you stopped your squabbling and squinted your eyes shut, preparing for the heat of the spices to hit your tongue as you allowed him to hand feed you a crisp piece of fresh kimchi. When Mingyu said spicy… he meant spicy. Though you tried to fight it off and chew gratefully, you weren’t prepared for the heat this man’s pallet craved.
“Good?”, he asked, tilting his head, a lock of wavy hair falling away from his face as he patiently and expectantly awaited your answer.
“Mhmmmnngggg”, your muffled agreeing was completely transparent as he tried not to laugh again, fetching you a glass of milk to wash it down.
“Are you okay, baby?”, he grinned, rubbing your back as he placed the cold glass in your hands to be gulped down in seconds.
“You tried to kill me!”, you yelped, slapping his arm, all the more amusing to him.
“Hmph.”, he pouted once more, turning back to his bowl and mixing it again thoroughly with his gloved hands. Of course you didn’t really mean it. And neither did he. But you still let him sway you with that stupid pout of his. Sliding your arms around his waist as he mixed, you pressed your face into the wide, firm plane of his back.
“It wasn’t that bad.”, you mumbled.
“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.”, he feigned stubbornly as if you couldn’t feel his diaphragm shake his chest with each silent chuckle.
“I SAID IT WASN’T BAD!“, you turned your face to scream into his back, most of the noise being absorbed.
“Oh! You said it needs more spice.”, he chortled, “Why didn’t you just say so, cutie?”
Rolling your eyes, you hopped onto the empty space on the counter and kicked your feet while peaking over the pots that were simmering on the stove since it was quite clear the kimchi was far too spicy for you. Finally catching a whiff from the steaming pots your tummy growled loudly and you frowned, fidgeting hangrily in your spot. After not eating since breakfast and enduring a long day of work, you longed for anything to fill your tummy. Mingyu was oblivious sometimes but it didn’t take a genius to notice.
“Hungry, baby?”, he chuckled, taking a small bowl and pouring a bit of broth from one of the pans into it. Taking another piece of kimchi from hell, he swished it quickly through the broth and offered it to you again. Making a face you turned your cheek and growled. Though it was meant to be menacing, he found it cute and endearing, hangry wasn’t a new emotion of yours.
“Heyyy… it won’t be so spicy this time!”, he assured you, waving it in front of your face, “I don’t like it when my puppy’s grumpy with me… or you can just bite me instead.”
As he lowered his hand you gave in, turning your head again toward him and squeezed your eyes shut tightly.
“Ahh~”, you opened your mouth, your nose scrunching and twitching as you awaited the awful spice you’d experienced before. With a smirk he fed it to you and waited, watching your scrunched up face relax as you realized it was just as he’d said.
“Daddy more?”, you asked, bouncing lightly on the counter at receiving something yummy to fill your aching stomach.
“Go wash up and I’ll have it ready.”, he clicked his tongue teasingly, always perking up a little at the appearance of his baby.
“But I’m hungry!”, you whined, eyeing the suddenly appealing kimchi he’d finished mixing.
“One more and then you have to go wash up for me, okay?”, he pecked your nose and then your cheek, helping you off the counter.
“Ahh!”, you opened your mouth again, content when you received another piece of rinsed kimchi and went on your way to clean up for dinner.
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🧸Endnote: why’s the theme giving Christmas XD today is cg Mingyu hahah. Short and cute (the opposite of Mingyu/j with love) I’ve been watching Kdramas lately with an extra dose of disassociating so writing has not been the top of my activity list but I’d been meaning to get to Caregiver Mingyu for a while. I see him mainly as a little but I can definitely see both. He’s just a big emotional and sweet puppy either way. Also this would def not be super realistic since fresh rinsed kimchi would legit basically be just cabbage flavored ~ 🐶🐰🍓
🧸Masterlist🧸
75 notes · View notes
untaemedqueen · 2 years
Text
The Deal
Drug Lord!Yoongi x Coffee Shop Owner!Reader
Genre: Strangers to Lovers!AU, Angst, Fluff, Smut
Chapter 21.
Series Warnings (Will Be Updated): Mentions of Drugs and Drug Deals, Blood, Smut, Emotional Damage, Love
Warnings For This Chapter: Leverage, Fluff
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Silk sheets and your touch is the only way Min Yoongi can wake up in a good mood these days. He stakes his life on it.
But for once, he woke up before you. It's not a normal thing that happens but he equates it to excitement.
He is so fucking excited for today.
He's never once thought about a woman having his tiger and now that he has you -- he wants nothing more than to see it on your skin.
You wanting this tattoo, this bond, he feels like he's died and gone to heaven.
So he left the bed a little bit early to let you get your rest. Yoongi hasn't seen the sun rise for a very long time and more than that, he's never appreciated the colors that dance across the sky like a pretty watercolor painting.
He looks down at his lit cigarette, watching the way the cherry shines brighter with each passing of wind that flows through the forest.
He can remember how much you hated the smell when he first met you. That feeling probably hasn't gone away but you just care for him too much to say anything now.
Dropping the cigarette from between his fingers, he stomps it out. And with one incredibly smooth motion, he tosses the rest of his cigarette pack into the garbage beside the gazebo.
You'll get everything you want, whether you ask for it or not.
He continues his stroll through the lush backyard, minding some piles of dog shit that haven't been cleaned up yet.
It's calm back here, transcendent almost.
He can make out the other's houses in the distance and there's movement that catches his eye immediately.
His hand reaches for his gun and he narrows his eyes at the view before him. It's distant but so clear before his eyes that he presses his lips into a thin line. He continues to get closer as the seconds tick on.
Jeongguk and Hanna slowly sneak out of Jimin's house and Yoongi watches on with rapt fascination.
"You little shit bag," he quips, walking closer.
The drug lord watches them kiss. It's slow and then so blindingly passionate that he averts his eyes out of courtesy.
Jeongguk doesn't want Hanna to leave that much is clear, they way he's trying to pull her clothes off in the morning sunlight.
Your boyfriend raises his eyebrows when the small woman beats her fists to his chest out of embarrassment.
"I'm gonna miss you, baby," Jeongguk murmurs, biting his bottom lip.
"Not as much as I'll miss you." she quips, giving him one final kiss.
Yoongi smirks.
This is such pure, untouched gold... that he'll be able to hold over your brother forever.
When Hanna finally gets into her car and drives away, Yoongi whistles loudly.
The noise makes Guk jump and the second he sees his boss he becomes like a scared child.
"Oh God!" he gasps, gripping onto Jimin's front railing.
"So you're with Hanna," Yoongi muses, resting his head against the tree beside him.
"Hyung, please, please, please don't tell my sister! Please!" Jeongguk begs, descending the stairs quickly.
Yoongi looks down at his shoes, raising an eyebrow at the tone of your younger brother's voice.
"That's gonna cost you, Gukkie." Yoongi sings, crossing his arms.
Your brother falls to his knees, grabbing at the scarred man's shirt. With a grimace, your boyfriend pushes his hands away.
"Anything! I'll do anything! My sister can't know about it! She'll kill me! Hanna works for her, she'll murder me!" Guk cries out, letting his head loll back.
"Well you should have thought about it before you canoodled with the barista," Yoongi quips, carding his fingers through his hair.
"I'll do anything!" Jeongguk pleads, making a prayer-like symbol with his hands and rubbing them together.
"Anything?" Yoongi inquires.
Oh, yes. This is just perfect.
"Yoongi?!" you call out from the back of the kitchen.
Even better.
Your boyfriend smiles widely down at the younger man. "Yeah, baby! Over here!"
"Hyung!" Jeongguk croaks, standing back up.
They both watch as you start your walk over and Jeongguk whines nervously.
"Anything! I promise! I swear on the tiger!" Jeongguk begs, pulling at Yoongi's sleeve like a kid.
"Get… off! Jesus! Fine. I'll take your pleading as a sign that you really want to keep this a secret. So let me make this perfectly clear to you, today your sister is getting my tiger on her chest and I don't want to hear you bitching about it for a single second. You hear me, Jeon? You keep your sister and I's relationship out of your mouth or I'll tell her all about you and little Hanna hookin' it up over the espresso powder."
Guk drops his mouth in horror at the older man's statement.
"Your tiger?! Are you craz-" your brother looks over at you, how close you are to them and he has an internal struggle for a minute before he groans loudly.
"Fuck! Fine! Goddammit!" he seethes through his teeth, bunching his hands in his hair into fists.
"You promise?" Yoongi teases, looking back at you with a large smile.
"Yes! I promise!" Guk grinds out, squeezing his eyes shut.
"Good little rat," the scarred man coos.
Finally, you step beside the drug lord, smiling up at him when he wraps his arm around your waist.
"What's going on over here?" you quip, laying your head against your boyfriend's chest.
"Oh, nothing. I was just telling Guk how you're getting the tiger today and he's so excited about it. Isn't that right, Jeongguk?"
You quip an eyebrow, expecting an explosion from your brother.
The younger man stares at his boss, eyes hard and unwavering.
They continue their staring contest for ten seconds too long before your brother blinks first.
"Ye-Yes. I'm just so happy you're going to be chained to Yoongi until the day you die." your sibling says forcibly, giving you a small smile.
"Really?" you chirp, looking up at Yoongi.
He winks down at you, drifting his thumb over your cheek softly.
"Oh yes. I can't wait to see you become a real, true mob wife. I'm just so over the moon that you'll be his old lady." Guk murmurs, looking down at the grass beneath his feet.
"Wow. Good. Okay! I thought you were going to throw me in the trunk and send me off to live at a nunnery or something," you breathe happily.
"Don't tempt me," he chuckles, narrowing his eyes at your boyfriend.
"He would never dream of it, baby doll," Yoongi smiles, narrowing his eyes back.
"Oh great! Thank you Gukkie! I'm so glad you're being supportive!" you beam, jumping into his arms and hugging him.
He shakes his head, baring his teeth at his boss.
"I have your coffee ready for you," you tell your boyfriend.
His eyes widen happily at the news and he holds his hand out for yours with a wink.
You take it with a smile, lacing your fingers with his.
As you start to walk away, Yoongi trails behind only to slap your brother upside the head with a chuckle.
The slow pulsing of Yoongi's hand in yours as he clenches and unclenches his fingers makes your mind go completely blank.
Today is the equivalent to getting married in your boyfriend's world.
He said it himself.
And it might be dumb to some, it might be ridiculously naive to believe that your first boyfriend, your only boyfriend, will be the forever love of your life. But you're okay with that.
While you stroll hand in hand towards the glass mansion, you let all of your worries and qualms just float away.
You love this man.
You love this stubborn, strong, lonely man.
And you've probably loved him since the second he helped you off the floor of your coffee shop the first day you both met.
All this push and pull of emotions, the strong desire to take care of the scarred man, the need to heal him -- that's all love.
It's unyielding, it's resilient, it thrums through your veins like a goddamn drug.
And you love that you love this man.
You love that he's yours.
You love that he's not going anywhere.
But like always you'll follow Yoongi's lead.
When he's comfortable with expressing himself in such a way, you will too.
"What're you holding over my brother that you got him to behave like that?" you inquire, dragging your nails over his tan, bare arm.
Your boyfriend smiles coyly, running his tongue over his teeth knowing he's been caught. "You tell me, Sherlock."
"Well if it was about him and Hanna, he's a moron. I know they've liked each other for years now...And the storage room has cameras, I have hundreds of dollars worth of coffee beans in there that need protecting." you quip, opening up the kitchen door.
Yoongi laughs loudly.
You make his heart bleed in so many ways with so few words, it's always a joy.
Picking you up easily, he holds you until he can set you down above him on the island counter. Your legs spread to accommodate him and he pulls down the strap of your nightgown slowly.
His fingertips run over the bare ink-free skin over your chest and goosebumps coat your skin accordingly.
"Feel free to hold it over Guk for as long as you like… I like it when he leaves us alone." you murmur, closing your eyes.
"I'll take you up on that, sweetheart," the drug lord coos, drifting his lips over your shoulder.
His kisses are slow and sensual, the petals of his lips move in time with your heartbeat, coating every centimeter of your skin as his own.
His kisses cease above your heart but his lips stay glued to your skin. His eyes flutter shut and he just stays silent. He's listening to everything -- the birds singing, the wind whipping through the trees, the inhales and exhales from you.
"I'm the luckiest man in the universe." he breathes, letting his forehead replace his mouth on your chest.
Running your fingers over the dragon tattoos of his scalp, you tilt your head.
"You turned me from a monster, from a hard shelled prick, into a man of devotion, into a man with a growing heart. This is all yours, sweetheart. Everything. Anything. I want you to know that."
"I just want you," you sing, tilting his face up.
His eyes are alight with care and earnestness.
"All I need is you," you whisper, coasting your thumb over his scar.
"You got me." he breathes, wrapping his arms around you.
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You're surprised to see the tattoo equipment just stacked up in the living room. You expected to be going to a dark, goth decorated tattoo parlor where the artists have so many piercings in their lips that they look like some sort of metallic man.
"This is special and private. They come to us." Yoongi announces, watching you drift your hands over the multitude of machines.
You've thought about getting tattoos several times, especially when Guk would come home every day with a new piece of ink.
Nothing has ever stood out to you though, not until now. You could never make up your mind about what you wanted on your body forever.
This new ink won't be just a regular old tattoo. This means something.
It means something so prolific and so wondrous that everything in the future might just fall short.
"Is it going to hurt?" you inquire, watching the tattoo artist enter the house without a word.
It wasn't long ago that Namjoon had taken the blindfold off this man. You know that Yoongi is private but to hide the sight of how to get to his house only makes it that much more obvious that you have so much to learn.
"It's the good kind of pain," your boyfriend promises.
His arms wrap around you as the tattoo artist begins to set up.
You watch on with rapt fascination, seeing how easy it is for the man to connect all the jumbled wires quickly with precision.
"You don't have to get this right now if you're unsure or nervous." the drug lord reminds you.
You can hear the sadness in his voice but you pick up on something else as well -- understanding.
Turning around to the man you adore, you wrap your arms around his neck.
"I want this. I want you. I've never been so sure about anything else except wanting a coffee shop." you avow.
Yoongi lets out a low whistle, pressing his forehead to yours. "You're a smooth talker. You can turn my insides to dust in a second if you keep talking like that."
Giggling, you stand on the tips of your toes.
"Boss?"
"Yeah, Ming?" Yoongi replies, hugging you tightly to him.
"The gold, please."
The drug lord hums in agreement. He pulls away to dig into his suit jacket. The bottle that he pulls out looks so incredibly expensive, it has diamonds along the entire base and smaller stones of rubies and sapphires.
He tosses the bottle with little caution and you jump nervously, widening your eyes.
Ming catches it easily, shaking the bottle with smooth motions.
"Looks expensive," you muse, turning back to Yoongi.
"It's real body safe gold. It goes for a pretty penny." he breathes, running his thumb over your cheek.
"Oh… I just assumed that the gold outline would just be a deep yellow or something."
"Not in our world." he quips, pulling away to grab a glass of liquor.
Our world.
Those two words have your stomach flipping intensely.
You're really his.
You're really doing this.
As your heart begins to feel lighter and lighter, almost to the point of you feeling like you can fly when the kitchen door bursts open.
"Yoongi," Jin hisses, dabbing the sweat on his sideburns.
Your boyfriend's head turns slowly, taking in the disheveled older man. He lets out a loud exhale, running his hands over his face as if he's becoming irritated.
"This is the most important day of my life, I told you I didn't want to be interrupted," the scarred man sighs, narrowing his eyes at Seokjin.
"Yeah… no… I know, I'm sorry but I need to talk to you," the oldest murmurs, looking over at you apologetically.
Your boyfriend shakes his head, gulping down the liquor with a quickness.
"Say what you gotta say," he urges, turning his attention to Ming who's almost done setting up. "Quickly."
Jin looks at you for a moment before humming uneasily.
"She's about to become my old lady. Anything you know, she will know. So just make this easy for me and hurry up," Yoongi breathes, pulling his gun out and putting it on the dining room table.
The drug lord sits down beside the chaise lounge and he motions for you to lay back for Ming.
You do as told, watching the oldest pick at skin around his nails nervously.
"I'm waiting," your boyfriend insists, spinning his gun on the table with his index finger.
Seokjin takes a deep breath, already cringing at the words that flow past his lips. "Someone stole half of our shipment of cocaine at the docks."
Your eyes immediately snap to Yoongi and his jaw tightens in an instant. His fingers flex and he grips the handle of his gun so tightly you're sure that he's going to crush it in his hands.
Without a word, you grab onto his hand. Your thumb strokes against his smooth skin and his eyes squeeze shut.
There's silence for a long time. Just the sounds of your boyfriend breathing heavily, the snap of latex gloves going onto hands and Jin nervously clearing his throat rings through the stagnant air.
"This is the equivalent of you spitting on my face on my wedding day. Do you realize that?" Yoongi seethes through his teeth.
"Yes, I know. But I needed to tell you. We just found out about it."
Your boyfriend gives a laugh, one devoid of any humor. "Do we know who?"
Jin looks down at his feet, dragging his hands over his sweaty face. "No… they killed all the cameras and took down all the guards."
Yoongi squeezes your hand so impossibly tight that you squeak at the sudden sharp pain.
He realizes his mistake immediately, checking on you in an instant. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart. I'm sorry," he coos, kissing you gently.
"I'm ready," Ming notifies the drug lord.
Disregarding Jin in the doorway, Yoongi looks at you. "You're sure you're ready for this?"
"Yes," you reply, squeezing his hand softly.
He smiles before turning his attention back to the oldest. "We'll deal with it later. This is more important."
Seokjin gives a strict nod, watching the tattoo artist pour out the gold ink into a small paper cup.
"Do you have a cigarette?" Jin inquires to the boss, patting down his own pockets.
Your boyfriend shakes his head, drifting his lips over the back of your hand. "Tryin' to quit."
Well that's news to you.
"A beautiful, headstrong, stubborn queen once told me she hated the smell," Yoongi quips, nodding to Ming to begin.
You find your neck and ears heating up at his words.
The thin transferable paper is pressed to your chest and when it's peeled away you exhale a breath you didn't even know you were holding.
"This means forever," your boyfriend whispers, holding up the mirror for you to see it.
Even in purple ink it's so much more beautiful than you could have imagined. It's larger than all the ones you've seen before and to your surprise you love that. It's the same exact fierce tiger that sits prettily on Yoongi's neck but the paws are more feminine and the tail is longer, ending just below your collarbone where it curls sweetly at the end.
It looks made for you.
"Forever," you promise.
The sound of the tattoo gun turning on sends shivers up your spine and you turn your head to look at your boyfriend for solace. His eyes are glassy, eyebrows knit together.
When the needle enters your skin, he lets out a shaky breath of relief.
You're so much more than perfection for him.
You're his family.
His life.
His home.
"Goddammit," he hisses, pressing his forehead to your knuckles.
When you whimper at the hot, dragging pain, he kisses over your hand to comfort you.
"My baby girl," he whispers fondly.
He's known it for a while now, even if he didn't want to admit it or rush into anything due to his prior failure at romance.
He's so in love with you that it takes up every cell in his entire body.
"My queen," he breathes, watching the tattoo come to life before his eyes.
You're such a huge part of this scarred man that there is no one else in the world that could make his heart bleed like this.
And he wouldn't change that for anything in the world.
Because this day, the day you got this new tiger tattoo, is the day your life changed forever.
This day was the day you were accepted into an empire that Yoongi had built for years.
And what comes next… Well, every queen gets a crown.
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<------ Last Chapter                                           Next Chapter ---->
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The Deal taglist – @jeon-junggoop, @btsarmy9593, @slothykrueger, @jcsmae, @milesjeon11, @cloudyblisss, @borahae-reads, @secretlycrazyhummingbird, @rjsmochii, @sugas-bbygirl, @ggukkieland, @hyungieyoongi, @chxmachxps, @dvalitaes, @vintageroses10, @maerawrrr, @flowerblu00, @veronawrites, @seoqity, @wozwaid, @hisbutton-nose, @sweetempathprunetree, @jinsearthh, @codeinebelle, @serious-addiction, @bt21chim, @rosquilleta, @dunixxd, @rkchmestizangmaldita, @openup-yourmind, @shesaysweirdthings, @marslena, @deathkat657​, @yoonlattesworld​, @that-funny-alien-28, @clutterfied, @belladaises​, @silentkei​, @btsnina​, @shydestinyyouth, @thefreddieman, @kkklaudiaaa17, @moonchild1
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breakfastwithbeb · 1 year
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hii! this is the mac/vanilla anon. may i know how did you make your build/gameplay screenies looks so pretty, vibrant and looks like they have dof? your screenies straight up look like you have reshade on and im so. WOAH<333 sorry if this ask sounds so weird but i play on mac too and my game looks so atrocious HSJFKEJFJ
oh my gOD thank u so much that is the nicest compliment i could ever receive 😭<3 i totally understand the game looking like pure garbage it's tough out there for mac players 💔 here's my
~editing process of a sad mac user~
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i use Photopea to edit everything. free and online, what's not to love!
oil paint filter with a radius of 0.8 to 1, lighting off
smart sharpen with a radius of 1.4 (these first two steps don't often do too much but can smooth out the edges of the pixels without having to play with edge smoothing on)
i like a bit of chromatic aberration so i go into channels, select red, and apply a lens correction filter of 3 (go back to regular channel afterwards)
to fake DOF - i use the quick selection tool and mess around with it until the foreground or preferred focus of the image is selected (doesn't have to be totally perfect, often times people won't be looking that close). then inverse the selection and apply lens blur, typically with a radius of 12 to 15 ----- (the selection part can be a real bitch - sometimes there just isn't enough contrast between the foreground and the background for Photopea to understand which specific section ur trying to select. in cases where it rlly refuses to work i've had to go in and use the polygonal lasso select tool and manually trace what i want to be in focus akjsdhfj)
apply photoshop actions to adjust colours - lately pretty much the only one i've been using is wooldawn's warmerfalls sometimes combined with intramoon's bright and saturated
sometimes i will apply a gradient fill layer (often the purple to orange one) and set the blending mode to luminosity, opacity 12 if there's a light source that i want to emphasise a little more. it also just adds a nice softening effect
for funky rainbow effects - look up "rainbow light leak overlay" and download any u like the look of. open and place them on top of ur image, fit them to size, change the blending option to exclusion, lower the opacity to desired outcome. to make the colours of the rainbow *pop* a lil more i like to duplicate the layer and change the blending option to overlay, though u may have to lower the opacity of this layer even more as it darkens the image quite a bit
i add a film dust texture over a lot of my posts! i downloaded a set a while back but i don't remember where from, sorry :( there are a bunch out there if u look it up i'm sure!
and that's about it! it seems like a lot written out but i'm self taught and technologically inept so it's all actually pretty basic when u know where all the buttons are in Photopea heh ;D thanks again for liking my posts!! it means the world u have no idea <3
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noctoutcold · 7 months
Text
It Works! ...If You Don't Think About It Too Hard, or: To Write A Good Romance Means Treating Your Audience With Respect
so!! I've gotten to chapter 9 on ffxv new game+ and oh. my god. it really cements just how much of a Not Character luna is when I barely even see her on screen before she fucking dies (not counting childhood flashbacks I think it was like, maybe 4 or 5 times of her as an adult, keep in mind that this is the royal edition I'm on, too) and I have a better perspective on just why lunoct is hot garbage. yes it's gonna be another one of those rants so grab the popcorn, all ye 7 people who have encountered this post on your dash.
in this particular playthrough, I decided to come in with a more open mind than usual and try to at least see the other side, and so maybe I figured I'd look for so-called "pro" lu///noct scenes, just to even out the playing field I guess and maybe gain a fresh perspective on their bond. lemme just say it is fresher, now.....in the anti lunoct sense.
so even after I saw those early scenes of noct very blatantly reacting to the impending wedding with pure utter boredom, I kept my eyes peeled (read: I was actively grasping for crumbs and straws bc things already weren't looking too hot) and caught notice of how every time luna's name was mentioned to noct, his eyes would widen just a tad, or maybe he'd crack a smile. like, eh, ok, it's maaaaaaaaaybe a puppy love thing if you do what I did and just blindly eat what you're fed like a chicken instead of thinking critically. BUT EVEN THEN, not once did I get the sense what he felt for luna was actually serious, the way the game intended to portray all along. just "aw, he's being shy, that's sweet I guess? *shrug*"
.....eeeeeeeeven though noct is literally just shy as a person like that's literally one of his main defining character traits and doesn't automatically constitute romantic intentions just bc he displays this behavior towards a woman. or at least you should come to this conclusion if you flip on that dusty lil switch in your brain that you turn off specifically to look at trashy guilty pleasure romance media and thus momentarily avoid acknowledging silly, frivolous things like, *scoff*, "good writing". (yes I know you do it, we all do)
so, anyway, I gleaned that even if I saw things from a point of view where noct had so-called "feelings for luna", it was just a "sheltered teenage prince gets a small fluffy crush that will inevitably fade in a couple months and you, the player, are just a parent sadly waiting from the sidelines to comfort him from that eventual pathetic fizzle into nothing" love, not a "his world would literally be shaken irreparably after her brutal death and he continues to pine for her endlessly afterwards only to ultimately marry her in a weird and honestly kinda creepy ghost wedding and have a supposedly beautiful happily ever after even though, y'know, they're fucking dead" love. already not promising, I know.
then I got to chapter 9, and was hit with a massive revelation thanks to having finished the game already and knowing how things will play out on luna's end: this entire time, noct and luna have not shared one single conversation with one another, face to face, as adults, and their relationship WILL stay that way permanently. that realization popping into my head upon reading the chapter 9 loading screen singlehandedly changed EVERYTHING positive I attempted to give to their "romance" and threw it all out the window. additionally, I also read some lunoct-critical posts here as another refresher—which, again, required me to actually turn on my brain. It's clear that when you take that plus noct just smiling 2 or three times plus how ffxv literally spells out how luna does not know noct at all, they have less than jack shit when it comes to romance.
and don't take my word for that last part, it's outright fully confirmed in this page of ffxv official comic anthology: volume 1 that, at the very least, luna puts noct on a pedestal and basically doesn't know the real him, imagining him as a literal GALLANT PRINCE ON A WHITE HORSE (er, chocobo).
Translation:
Gentiana: “Has the notebook arrived?”
Luna: “Yes, Umbra just brought it now.”
Luna: “Though we cannot meet, he is growing into a fine prince suited for a white horse.” (girl,, he is a socially anxious nerd who hates veggies and constantly takes naps. he's clearly still just a kid at this point and that is emphasized multiple times in ffxv's story. like, honey, hate to break it to ya but you're making shit up in your head to mold noct into your "ideal" man)
Gentiana: “Lunafreya...”
“A white horse...?” (SGDODHDWBSLEJ EVEN GENTIANA'S CONFUSED HOLY SHIT)
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that's the key here: for all the split second stares noct gives at luna being mentioned, and the claim that SO MANY PEOPLE SPOUT abt how luna and noct "actually know each other well" thanks to that stupid ass notebook, even the devs themselves are taking humorous digs at how no, actually, they're blindly putting each other on an unreasonable pedestal and don't understand each other as people, just beacons of admiration. Even if the ffxv team is making light of this idolization and playing it for laughs in the context of this officially licensed manga, the fact that they even canonized it at all should be cause for concern regarding the relationship's integrity.
and.....yeah, that's the thing with lunoct that pisses me off.
if a game has to deceive you into thinking that there's somehow more to a romance by adding cute brief smiles instead of genuine communication, and tells you that you have to blindly follow its word that the romance is real, true, honest to god love and not "heehoo girl pwetty *monke noises*", that is the writer actively avoiding making any effort to flesh said romance out, and treating its audience like it's too stupid to notice.
and as a writer myself, I cannot begin to tell you the sheer degree that kind of lazy, demeaning condescension towards readers INFURIATES me. but to hopefully convey it, I want to show you this exchange dialogue between two love interests from the 2013 movie "Her":
"Samantha, why are you leaving?"
"It's like I'm reading a book... and it's a book I deeply love. But I'm reading it slowly now. So the words are really far apart and the spaces between the words are almost infinite. I can still feel you... and the words of our story... but it's in this endless space between the words that I'm finding myself now. It's a place that's not of the physical world. It's where everything else is that I didn't even know existed. I love you so much. But this is where I am now. And this is who I am now. And I need you to let me go. As much as I want to, I can't live in your book anymore."
compared to this infamous exchange between noct and an unnamed little girl he encounters in chapter 12, verbatim:
"Prince Noctis, were... were you excited to marry Lady Lunafreya? Because she was really excited to marry you! She looked so happy the day her dress arrived. She really loved you, Prince Noctis."
"I... Thank you."
that. that is the difference between show vs. tell. THAT is the difference between putting passion and effort in showing people a meaningful, beautiful romance that came from the heart vs. shouting to us that it's there, as if we are too stupid to understand otherwise. this mind numbing spoon-feeding is how ffxv manages to somehow give us absolutely no genuine, meaningful proof of lunoct's credibility as a romance yet simultaneously shove its existence down our throats: ffxv gives us scant crumbs, forces the player to swallow them, and expects the player to enjoy it without question like it's three-michelin-star filet mignon.
And if you are a writer, please, PLEASE do not do this. People will figure it out, they will start to realize there's nothing under the curtains, they will start to feel pissed and insulted, even if there are a good few fans that ultimately stick in spite of all the backlash.
Treat your audience with the respect they deserve. Treat them like people, and not 5 year olds that you have to sloooooowly read an ABC book to in order for them to fully understand its contents.
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