#ok but putting THAT thing aside i think the real way i found out i was not-looking-at-men-in-a-straight-way was by dating a girl actually

[rogueddie]

Steve and Robin are very physically affectionate. It's part of their friendship, Eddie supposes, for them to be all over each other. He knows it's not romantic. He and Robin have already come out to each other, there's nothing to worry about there...

But Eddie has started to wonder if that physical affection is restricted to Robin. He's started to wonder if he'd be allowed to be like that with Steve. He's started to wonder if it would mean the same thing.

He decides there's only one way to find out. He decides to just... go for it. Slowly. He hopes it leads to good things.

When they next sit down to watch a movie in Eddies trailer, he doesn't go for the single chair, tells Robin and Steve to shift. It's a squeeze, but they all fit. Steve is squished between him and Robin but, if anything, he looks very happy.

He starts sitting closer after that, pressing fully against him. He never looks bothered, doesn't even acknowledge it happening outside of the occasional smile sent his way.

So Eddie ups the ante. He starts touching his back, as casually as he can- the first time, he puts a hand on his lower back, gently pushing him forward so Eddie can squeeze past. Sometimes he'll pat him on the back. Usually, he'd let his hand rest on Steves back when he's leaning close.

But, again, Steve doesn't react much. Sometimes Eddie will catch him smiling to himself, sometimes will feel him leaning back into the contact. So it's more than ok. But Eddie kind of wants to see Steve react...

He puts a hand on Steves thigh one day. The opportunity was perfect- Robin is on the other side of the room and Steve, sitting next to him, blocks his view. So he shifts, leaning forward, using Steves thigh as leverage.

Steve goes a little pink, but still... no real reaction.

Eddie keeps getting more touchy. To the point where no one bats an eye at Eddie being just as all over Steve as Robin is. Yet, aside from blushing a little more, Steve doesn't react.

Eddie isn't sure why he wants Steve to react, isn't sure how he wants him to react. He just knows that something will happen if he starts pushing and he's too curious to see what it is to stop now.

In the end, it's the smallest thing that finally makes him crack.

Eddie had come into the kitchen, finding Steve in the middle of doing the dishes. He'd snorted when he noticed a loose strand of hair hanging loose, Steve struggling to push it back without using his wet, soapy hands.

So Eddie stepped forward without thinking, gently brushing the hair back, taking a moment to brush through his hair and making sure it's sat right, how he usually styles.

"Oh, you fucking..." Steve muttered. He narrowed his eyes, almost glaring. "I don't know if you're just trying to be friends, but if that's all you want then you need to tell me, right now, because otherwise I'm going to kiss you."

Eddie blinks, stunned. "Your gonna what?"

But Steve takes that as an answer. Which then gives Eddie his; that type of physical affection is restricted to Robin. It means something very different with Eddie.

Later, curled up in bed with him, Eddie knows he's definitely found a good thing. He decides that he's not going to let go, not unless Steve wants him to.

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #steve x eddie #steddie fic #ficlet #fluffifc

[bomberqueen17]

noodle bowl recipe/technique

When I'm not at the farm it's always a struggle to eat as many vegetables as my body wants me to eat. Like it's just confusing to go out and buy vegetables when you're really used to just kind of going to the walk-in cooler and being like "ok what have we got too much left over of, time to Eat That", and I need to overcome this by having a recipe in mind beforehand but one I can adapt if they don't have the thing I'm thinking of at the store. So I'm trying to collect not recipes so much as techniques, because I have this problem where it's hard for me to follow a recipe because I accidentally skip reading the middle of it. Ha.

(I saw a good post about how "measure that shit with your heart" is misleading and like, mood. I am a very experienced cook but I have attention problems and can't follow a recipe if I'm tired or distracted or in pain. So I'm trying to link to real everything is measured for you recipes where I can, so if you haven't made this before and don't know what it should look like, you've got a tested version with proper amounts to start with. Just like I do! And then once I have the technique down, and the relative amounts, I'm sharing my method, which is less so on the measuring and more on my mother's technique, which is "you put in enough and then cook it until it is done", which when I was new was so frustrating, but now that I am old, I know it is 100% based on practice. And that's all, there's no mystery, it's just "I've made it before and I know how it should look so you just make it look like that." Now that I can't reliably read a whole recipe and not miss a big whack of the middle of it, I rely so much on having practiced and generally knowing what things look like when they're "right". But it's not magic and I'm not measuring with my heart I'm measuring with my practiced eye and hand.)

Anyway. Rice bowls or noodle bowls are a fantastic way to just throw a bunch of vegetables into a nice yummy sauce over a good comforting starch and have that be a meal. I tend to do a noodle bowl, and then any left over ingredients get incorporated into a fried rice scramble thing later, so you can keep that in mind if you want to try this.

I found this recipe for butternut squash mushroom noodle bowls. And I tried it as written, and it wasn't bad, but for me, roasting everything in the oven was very hard to time and didn't turn out fantastically well. YMMV, but I have more experience sauteeing things. (My first attempt I also used bok choy instead of spinach so I roasted it separately on another sheet pan according to a technique I've done before for roasted bok choy; this approach would probably work just fine if you were paying more attention than I was; my main issue was that noodle bowl recipe linked above gives far too little time for the butternut squash to roast so mine was unpleasantly crunchy. It's wrong, give it longer, and so I found it best to just not try to squeeze anything else onto the sheet with it as that recipe directs.)

So I changed it up for a second try.

First thing I did was peel the butternut squash with a vegetable peeler (I find it easiest to do this if I kinda cut it in half crosswise first), then scoop out and set aside the squash guts, then cube the thing up and roast it on a sheet pan, drizzled with peanut oil and salt and set at 400.

That's gonna take like 45 minutes or so, so I set most of my timing around that. Check the directions on your noodles or whatever, figure out what order you've got to do those in. (Soba are best for the protein, but I had rice noodles and they needed a pre-soak and it messed up my timing, which is why I'm making this note here.)

dice an onion. preheat skillet, add oil, begin to sautee onions.

rinse and prepare bok choi or other green of choice.

when the squash is part of the way cooked (like 25 minutes or so, give it a stir and check it to see if it's softening at all), take the seeds you set aside. separate them from the guts (I squeeze them with my fingers out of the assorted gut-fibers, works pretty well), spread in single layer on small baking sheet. turn oven down to 350. drizzle seeds with sesame oil and a tiny bit of salt. put them in the oven for like ten to fifteen minutes. (Turning the heat down is my attempt to have them not pop and fly all over the oven. IDK if it'll work. Be prepared to wipe seeds out of your oven tomorrow morning. They're not messy at least they just fly everywhere.)

Now throw your mushrooms and some diced garlic into your onions and saute. Add the bok choi or spinach or kale or whatever as you're stirring. Cook it all down.

Now make your sauce-- I did not measure anything this go-round, I just grated a bunch of ginger (I keep my ginger root in the fridge and it's easy to microplane off whatever you need) into a wee prep bowl, then added soy sauce, some honey, a couple spoonfuls of water from the boiling noodles to melt the honey and clean the spoon, and then a spoonful or two of chili crisp ("happy lady sauce" [lao gan ma]) because i don't stock sriracha currently.

When your noodles are ready, turn the oven off. Drain the noodles and divide them into your serving bowls, top with squash, add sauteed veg, squash seeds, the sauce. top with sesame seeds.

This was awesome, and I have leftover cooked squash cubes I'm gonna put into another recipe later cuz if you're gonna roast a butternut you might as well roast a pretty big one. I particularly like using the squash seeds because they're so tasty and crunchy and deserve to be eaten rather than thrown out.

#recipe post #comfort foods

[3am-starry-night-sky]

What we can take away from the Hidden Strifes event: Diluc and his current relationship with Kaeya

I have too many ideas and new theories filling my mind, so I’ll be making several separate posts. Many things have already been mentioned by others, so I’ll be going over those things briefly or maybe even not at all. 

 Ok, let’s start with the new info we have regarding Diluc and the series of events that followed his father’s death.

Diluc did not leave right away. And it was actually Alice who gave him the idea, and from the wording of both of their letter, it didn’t seem to be so much about going on a killing spree, but more about getting away and finding himself (being lost due to the recent events) and along with that also the truth. Also, Kaeya somewhat helped him with it, keeping Jean and Varka from stopping Diluc and giving him a tip on how to leave.

(A part from Alice’s letter)

(A part from Kaeya’s letter) The way He worded the last part, makes it seem like Kaeya himself has thought about doing something similar. 

Not so much about Diluc, but we learn that Kaeya kept Diluc updated about the Eroch situation, even though the other hasn’t been shown to have replied or requested the info. You know the “You don’t have to reply” Also that the whole Eroch process took quite the effort from the Knights and probably also time. 

EDIT: I also want to add that Kaeya might be aware or at leas have suspicions of Diluc working with a secret organization. Or those “businessmen” were from the fatui. But I’m more leaning on the first.

   Diluc isn’t so much against the Knights of Favonius, but due to their different approaches and differences in philosophy, he prefers steering clear of them, unless cooperation is necessary. Also, we can not forget that Diluc still holds a grudge towards the knights actions following his father’s death.

Lastly, it becomes even more clear that Diluc’s character is built on justice and righteousness. And also that he’s someone who thinks about the present and future more than the past. Basically, someone who strides towards the better future, rather than sulking in the past. But interestingly it seems like he also takes a lot after what he has experienced in the past, sort of gets stuck in his feelings and doesn’t forgive so easily. 

(This is opposite to Kaeya, someone who lingers on the past and holds onto mementoes from everything he can, but yet is quick to forgive and put aside his own feelings. He feels hesitant about the future and prefers not to think about it, rather enjoying what he can in the present)

(I might make a separate post about talking about How Kaeya and Diluc are both parallels and opposites to each other)

Now to unpacking Diluc’s and Kaeya’s relationship: 

The most important thing we can take away from this event, is that the two have been exchanging letters over the years. Kaeya took the initiative almost immediatly, and even though Diluc was at first resistant, he eventually started sending in replies. 

(I’d like to add, that these reveals are very important. I personally feel that they have made not only both Kaeya’s and Diluc’s characters feel more fleshed out but also their relationship and the string of events more clearer and civil. Basically, it feels much more realistic now. And I’ve certainly felt my perception of the two shift a little)

It seems like their relationship isn’t as bad as some thought, but at the same time it seems like it’s still not as good as some hoped for. I’d say they have found some common ground and are at least on speaking terms. And interestingly you can feel the tone of the letters get better over the years. 

Talking about the tone of the letter. It seems still a bit cold/resistant and there are some jabs at each other here and there, but overall it does seem better than how they communicate in real life. I think an interesting thing to note when comparing the letters to the others, is that while the tone of the other letters reflect more respect and warmth, it’s partially because the letters sent to Albedo, Alice Jean and Varka have been written in a rather polite manner. In an opposing way writings exchanged between Kaeya and Diluc are much more casual (Kaeya’s more than Diluc’s, but still). 

Maybe I’m looking too much into this, but this line right here, is one of the jabs that actually also seems to have some compassion in it. It seems to be sending a message “Why don’t you worry about yourself instead, I know you act similarly/you aren’t any better, so please do take of yourself too”

Overall it feels like they both have moved past their initial conflict, but there still seems to be a rock between them that makes it awkward. 

It seems like Kaeya holds no grudge towards Diluc and his actions and instead takes the blame himself (While they both certainly hold some blame, it feels a bit unhealthy to forgive everyone who hurts you, but you do you, honey). It does feel very Kaeya-like to look at both sides of the conflict and not lable people as good-and-bad or hero-and-villain (Given that Kaeya himself stands between a conflict, having seen both sides, and I’d say that that experience is the base of Kaeya’s character and his actions, but that’s an entirely new topic I might post about one day)

There’s no backup to this claim (at least not one I can think of right now), but I’d say (and I’ve seen others theorize this), that perhaps Diluc seems hesitant towards Kaeya, because he sees his actions as a wrongdoing, a misguided justice, a violation of his own philosophies and while he has tried to learn from that, he still (depending on whether he knows or not about kaeya never having blamed him) doesn’t see himself as worthy of forgiveness. As “I should uphold myself to same standards as I do others” (So If I can’t forgive others why should others forgive me). And thus keeping a bit of distance from Kaeya, at elast emotionally. 

(Or It’s Kaeya who can’t accept that Diluc has changed, and is thus approaching the matter from the wrong angle. Always referencing things from the past, perhaps thinking it will bring back the old Diluc.)

Lastly, I’d say that we got even more proof about how much the two work together behind the scene. At this point, Kaeya might as well be sponsoring Diluc’s whole Darknight-hero affair.

And the fact that Kaeya immedaitly figured out that Diluc was the Darknight-hero (though let’s be honest, it’s not that hard) and that similarly Diluc figured out that Kaeya wasn’t blinded, shows that despite both having changed and their relationship not being what it used to, they still know each other better than they’d like to admit.

PS: Sorry if the post is a bit all over the place and long. My thoughts themselves have been all over the place after the reveals. Plus, I’m not best at putting my thoughts to words sometimes, well actually most of the time.

#genshin #kaeya #diluc #ragbros #hidden strifes #spoilers #a lot of stuff already #but I might add mroe stuff #I sometimes feel bad for only talking and theorizing about these two #wow why did this take an entire day to post #also 16 tabs open

[lovesickfoolwp]

i'm right here — conrad fisher

pairing : conrad fisher x fem!reader

summary : you can't say you that don't love your mother, but, one night her victim complex took over and she started a whole fight with you. so, you messaged conrad and asked him to come urgently to get you out of there. you felt like you were suffocating in the house, but little did you know that the suffocating feeling would've still be following you. lucky, conrad was right there with you.

warnings : mommy issues, anxiety, anxiety attack

"you never try to understand when i tell you to do something useful for this family!" your mother's voice could be heard in the background and her words were directed at you, you just didn't know exactly why. because your mother, like any other mother, always found a reason to make a fuss.

but she had already been shouting for several minutes, hurling insults, and yet, you didn't say anything. you just wiped your tears with the palm of your hand, while you wrote a message to conrad, who was your boyfriend for a long time and knew about the situation at your home.

hey, do you think you can come to pick me up real quick?

you were on top of your bed with the door closed, but your mom slammed the door against the wall and started yelling at you from the doorway. "are you even listening to me?"

you hurried to close your phone screen and look up at her. "yeah." was the only word that managed to roll off your lips.

she was not a fool. she saw you with the phone in your hand. so she rolled her eyes and gave you a fake laugh, dramatically even, as she walked out the door and continued her reproval.

your phone buzzed two times in your hand and you quickly looked to see the answer, while holding your breath.

i'm already on my way.

i'll get to you in less than a minute.

at the sight of the texts, you allowed yourself to smile to yourself, at least for a second. then you replied with "OK" and hurried to the door, hoping not to run into your mother.

unfortunately, when you put your hand on the doorknob, you heard a loud voice, her voice, behind you.

"where do you think you're going, young lady?" you turn a few degrees, at the point when you can look at her, and you noticed her positioning herself with her hands on her hips. "i'm not done talking!"

"um, i—," you wanted to say something. anything. you really wanted to. but conrad's car horn got you ahead.

your mother walked past you, pushing you aside and looked through the visor. "is that conrad?"

"yeah."

she moved away from the door and looked at you, dominating you. "and where do you think you are going without my permission?"

"i need a break.” you said in a barely audible tone, but oh, she clearly heard you.

"a break?" she repeated after you and laughed sarcastically. "now i'm such a burden that you need a break away from me?"

you were quick to explain yourself "that's not it—", but the door opened. seeing how long it takes you to get out, conrad understood that something happened and decided to take him the first step.

a stone was taken off from your heart when you saw him, and he, looking first at you and then at your mother, realized that he was right. something had indeed happened.

"ms y/l/n, do you think you can let y/n stay at my place tonight?" he asked your mother, trying to be as calm as possible. he knew that your mother loved you, but he could not easily overlook the way the woman treats you sometimes. "i promised my mother that y/n would accompany us tomorrow to the conference where she would attend, and she insisted on y/n coming early, so she could be having lunch with us and sleeping overnight because we were leaving in the morning."

he couldn't be a more perfect boyfriend. he always takes his time, and leaves his pride away, to explain certain things to your mother in detail. he didn't want to cause you more problems.

being also charmed by how well was conrad raised, when he wanted to show that, your mother didn't stay long to think and agreed. so in no time you were in conrad's car. you set off, but he wasn't going to keep his word.

when you noticed he missed the turn to his house, you asked him "what about the conference you were talking about?"

"there's no conference." he answered you and immediately, taking advantage of the red traffic light, he looked in your direction to see your confused reaction. "I had to have a plausible excuse."

when the red light turned green again, conrad took advantage of the fact that it was late and the road was freer than usual, starting up the car and accelerating the speed.

"so... if there's no conference, where are we going?" you asked him, playing with your fingers to get rid of the feeling of anxiety eating you from inside.

"you'll see," he said stopping the car and looking at you again. he put his hand, which until recently was on the gear box, over your left hand and smiled at you, trying to calm you down. he had noticed that you were playing with your fingers. watching you. "but don't worry. i actually talked to mom and you will be staying over tonight. now," he reached for the door on his side, still holding your hand. "let's go."

he placed a short kiss on your hand and after he got out of the car first, he went around the car and came to your side, he opened the door, holding out his hand to you.

"you're putting on such a show." you said, taking his hand and giving him permission to help you get out of the car, and jokingly rolling your eyes.

"only for you." he said in a serious tone and then laughed lightly. he wasn't the type to say romantic things, but he made an effort for you. he knew that you adored them.

despite the fact that you were on the pontoon, looking at the sea and the sky above you, and he was acting as wonderful as before, maybe even more wonderful if that was possible, the feeling of anxiety had not left you. your mind was against you that day and it sabotaged you by replaying the argument you had earlier with your mother.

conrad was talking next to you, trying to lift your mood, but you couldn't hear him. you looked towards him, but you only saw him moving his lips, while a feeling of insecurity suddenly took hold of you. you wanted to keep the feeling in check. to be strong and stand up to it. but when you remembered that during your fight with your mother, she threatened you that if you didn't start doing what she says you to do, she would be forced to separate you from conrad.

at that moment, the fear of losing him took total control over your body and you started to feel your lungs emptying of air. you tried to inhale, but it was impossible for you.

"y/n!" conrad called out your name, and this time you heard him, putting his hands on your shoulders, forcing you to look at him. "y/n, look at me!" he insisted.

you barely raised your eyes to him, connecting with his, as you tried to breathe.

you didn't show any signs that you can do it on your own. on the contrary, you had started to feel a warmth in your whole body, as if you were on fire, and to become softer in his arms. so he began to breathe in and out deeply, prompting you to do the same. "y/n! you are safe. you're with me. focus on my breathing and follow me."

you tried to do as he told you and you almost succeeded, but getting impatient, being too worried for you, he took his hands from your shoulders. putting one of them around your waist to keep you on your feet, while the other lifted your chin towards him, caressing your cheek with his thumb, he lightly connected his lips to yours. the kiss was a calm one, just trying to keep your mind occupied and waiting for your heartbeat to calm down.

after a few seconds, you pulled back from the kiss and he pressed his forehead to yours, listening carefully to see if you calmed down.

"what was that?" you asked him as your heartbeat stabilized and you started breathing regularly.

he smiled slightly and that's when you realized how close he was. "I guess that that was my new method of calming you down."

you smiled in return and gently wrapped your arms around his neck.

"i liked it."

he chuckled, pulling away from you, not before pressing a kiss to your forehead, saying "of course you did."

you pouted theatrically, laughing immediately afterwards and muttering under your breath, "asshole."

he laughed.

then he immediately turned to you, studying you carefully with his eyes, at which point you felt yourself melting. "what did you just called me?"

"i—" you tried to think of a good lie, but you had noone, so you said quickly, laughing "i didn't called you anything!"

"hm." he made a sound, like an upset child. "are you sure about that?"

he gave you his typical look, looking you up and down, and you bit your tongue by mistake.

you nodded, and he started tickling you so hard, wanting to hear you laugh again. between your laughs and your weak attempts to push him aside, he was preoccupied with enjoying the way your face lit up.

he was madly in love with you.

#tsitp #the summer i turned pretty #tsitp fanfic #tsitp imagine #tsitp x reader #conrad fisher #conrad fisher x reader #conrad fisher x y/n #conrad fisher fluff #team conrad #the summer i turned pretty imagine

[blue-b-bro]

The use of genre as unreliable narrator in ofmd

„But it’s a comedy!”

(I had to, sorry)

Ok, people usually take this argument out when talking about there being jokes, or getting a happy ending. It’s not dark fantasy like Game of Thrones, it’s not a mature drama, like Better Call Saul.

But in most stories the darker genre is justified by the fact that that’s realistic, that’s how the real world works. Going with that explanation, writing a fantasy like this is like an oxymoron (I’m not saying it’s a bad choice, just pointing out). Recently tho, it became popular to think that a story is meaningful or mature only if it’s realistic, the dark-way-realistic, if you get what I mean. If the story is too optimistic, the ending too happy, it’s apparently not realistic enough and so - silly. If the story wants to talk about something deep but there’s not enough misery, someone will inevitably come and point out how in real life it wouldn’t be like this and so the message is meaningless.

Going back on track: in most stories the genre is like the laws of physics of the story. Once set they’re absolute. You can subvert the tropes, cliches, expectations, but the genre stays intact. If in a story taking place in a genre expected to be more serious, more grand the author puts too many jokes, it’s bad writing. It’s against the laws of this world and shouldn’t be there.

And usually it’s ok, we have a lot of genre, we can take new approach to them, make them fresh, mix them. But I haven’t found that many stories that use A genre (not “Their genre”) so much as a tool, so explicitly as a tool to show characters perspective and worldview.

Let’s just quote what I’ve already said, because it was rather well put imo:

“Season 1 is more comedy like, because it’s from Stede’s point of view, mostly. Sometimes the lighthearted music actually doesn’t fit the scene, unless we take into account that it’s about how Stede sees this. Stede’s flashbacks aren’t funny, his marriage isn’t funny. Stede cares about Ed and so his flashbacks are treated seriously too, even more so (cause you know, Stede doesn’t care about himself much). But Izzy is treated as a joke. Stede doesn’t like him and isn’t afraid of him (because he doesn’t know he lives only because Ed forbade Izzy from killing Stede) and so scenes that are sad and depressing from Izzy’s perspective don’t get an appropriate music (like in e6 for example). The world is shown through Stede’s eyes. Ed is cool and scary and treated very seriously, Stede tries to hide his very real pain under his adventures and Izzy… He doesn’t care about Izzy. The scenes where Stede is scared make him look pathetic but when it’s Ed, it’s completely serious, because Stede treats Ed’s fear seriously, but finds his own shameful and, well, pathetic. The comedic tone is the unreliable narrator here.

Episode 8 isn’t so much comedic anymore. Stede feels out of place, pushed aside, and the whole episode feels like that. Episode 9 isn’t a comedy either, it’s seeped in self doubt and lingering regrets. Episode 10 has comedic vibe mostly during Stede’s adventurous escape and kinda during Ed’s pink robe phase. Kinda, because alone with Lucius, there’s no jokes, with Izzy too. The comedy stays on deck, with the crew, Stede’s crew that as a whole goes under the adventurous light vibe. But at the end of season 1 the vibe of the show completely changes. There’s no jokey comedy anymore. Yeah, Stede’s still a bit silly now and then, because that’s how he feels about himself. But at Ed’s Revenge there’s only 100% drama.”

Another thing is, with every episode, we get more and more alone time with Ed, he becomes a protagonist of his own. His alone scenes aren’t funny. Usually those are somber or depressing. In e10 their two perspectives part the moment Stede runs away. Since then there’s Stede’s world and Ed’s world. It’s Ed’s sky that’s pink. It’s Stede’s world where the assassination attempt is funny. Ed tries to maintain Stede’s reality on the Revenge, but it turns out bleak in comparation. There’s no comforting blanket of escapism and naivety. No one to nourish the optimism and the atmosphere of safety without Stede being here. It’s becoming more and more Ed’s world again. Depressing, dangerous, more realistic. Because Ed lost his faith in Stede’s world, it the value of love and comfort.

The divide is even more visible in episodes 1-3 of s2. Just what people were laughing about: Stede’s crew gets soup and Ed’s fights for their life. Stede most of the time bottles up his negative emotions, keeping his “realm” light and adventurous. Very rarely he let’s himself to actually feel his real emotions (in the rain, during the night talk with Lucius, maybe with Zheng, tho I’m not sure if it’s not more thinking than feeling at that moment really). Stede’s keeping his darkness hidden, focused on hope. When they meet Lucius and then Ed’s crew, the little cracks starts showing up. We start to see less of a humor and more of sincerity. Season 2 is less comedic and more sincere in it’s form. Because that’s how Stede feels, after realizing his feelings for Ed, after realizing what’s important to him, after getting him back. (He couldn’t accept Ed’s dead, so he wasn’t << “I’m not ready to believe that”) His world is more real. It’s not ignorance, naivety or detachment anymore, rather hope, optimism and having an actual goal. In season 1 Stede just wanted to run away from his life, now he had a specific goal to fix what he destroyed (no matter how much of it was really his fault).

Going back to Ed’s perspective in e1-3, we are told about his emotional state, for example, by weather. It’s also interesting how at the beginning of e2 Ed’s crying session is treated seriously, showing him feeling empty, abandoned, longing all at once. But the next day, when he recalls the incident, it’s framed like a joke. You know, how when you get an emotional breakdown and then later think “damn, that was embarrassing and unnecessary”? It was something like that. When he torments Izzy, it’s dark af, because he sees himself as a monster. The tone of a scene doesn’t say how actually important/serious/deep/meaningful the scene really is, but how the character sees it. Just as Stede saw his fear as pathetic in s1, Ed treats like that his sincerity. His abandonment is only deserved and him crying about it is pathetic, his self hate and violence in the afterlife just a dry fact, his fisherman era suddenly taking a jump into comedy the moment he feels he failed.

We can see Ed’s and Stede’s realities getting more similar, because their view on reality is getting more towards the middle. Ed gets more forgiveness and softness and it isn’t depicted as ridiculous. Stede's adventures get more bloody (the cursed ship), threats more real (Ned Low’s tortures). Buttons change was so out of the blue and unrealistic, because that’s how Ed saw the concept of change. He was so sure it’s not real and that’s why it was like a magic. That’s why he was alone, while witnessing it. Izzy was able to survive all that happened to him, because Ed believed he's indestructible and will always have his back, even if he doesn't deserve it. (if I'm right, then it's the presence of Stede that killed Izzy)

The weather, the colors show Ed’s emotions:

While Ed’s emotions were muddled and confusing in e5, we got the fog, when he was happy in the beginning, but then started to feel more and more unsure in e7 – the colors changed from yellow to gray, when he was happy about how Calypso’s birthday turned out, but then Ned Low appeared -  the colors changed from romantic pink and purple, to disturbing green and blue suddenly, as if his past, his sins poured a bucket of cold water on his head. When he thinks he will finally die, finally made that decision, he’s relieved, and sunny weather mirrors that, but in his last moment, when he has to face it, they’re in the middle of a storm. His gravy backet is cold, cloudy and so windy it’s hard to hear anything. Hell, the first time we see Queen Anne it’s in its own dark weather!

Stede, becoming “real boy” and then “a man” makes the world around him more realistic as well. After Ned tortured his crew and Ed, Stede kills the guy. After becoming suddenly famous, the world takes a step back and everything is light and funny around him again, no real danger, Stede kills the guy without even trying and it’s funny and cool, because He feels cool about all of it. But when Ed says that last night was a mistake and then leaves, there’s no more cool Stede. Suddenly his happy adventure is falling apart, his crew doesn’t want to follow him just because (because why were they always together since the end of s1?), his behavior isn’t cool anymore, but pathetic, Steak knife probably died, his tricks don’t work, because he doesn’t believe they would, not really. He doesn’t feel like it’s some cool pirate duel from pirate tales, like in e6. He feels like a failure. Everyone left him, whatever he does, apparently it’s not enough for people to stay, and when he hit the rock bottom, the Republic of Pirates gets destroyed.

The way the world works is related to what Stede and Ed believe in atm. But if they're together on screen, it's Stede's beliefs that shape reality.

So I don’t think they changed the rules of the world in e8. The rules were changing all the time, and the world became deadly during ep 6-7, somewhere there. The tone of the episode didn’t warn us, because Ed was happy most of the time, and so the color palette of the episode is light.  The left-side rule didn’t work, because Stede wasn’t as naïve as in s1 (he wasn’t sure Ed was right, but decided to believe him). Stede’s crazy plan didn’t work as in e1&2s1, because he was more aware of the risk. Stede knew they could die, knew it’s dangerous, and so it was. Ironic really.

#My great comeback I guess #Ofmd #Ofmd s2 #ofmd meta #our flag means death #stede bonnet #edward teach #E8 #Like it's not really about that but just to clarify: I think they could make some things differently in the finale #But the things that were good were great #So it's 50/50 #But it's not a post about the finale really #I'm just replying to the accusations about the show suddenly forgetting its own rules #And I disagree with people who view this show as a sitcom #And I've read some posts about the use of the genre and no one saw it like I did (or I haven't found one that does) #Everyone are only talking about the muppet genre and the Izzy genre

[gaemms-chamois]

random unorganized darknights trio + paprika musings bc sometimes i'm hit with like a pang of Brief Worry that i'm completely misinterpreted blabla that usually doesn't last too long bc i then go back to my state of I'm Just Vibing but ig at some point i just gotta let it out publicly once and be done with it lol

this is messily written Please Understand this isn't meant to be a grand thought piece

fuuuck ok well this is like very specifically abt the w, ines & paprika part now

like don't get me wrong on this. i joke abt wines moms and stuff but i dont genuinely mean it in the way of wahh wow littol family for reals kinda deal?

less on wines 'adopting' paprika, moreso paprika imprinting on them like a duckling after she was saved by them. paprika adopted them lmao. i cannot possibly interpret either w or ines as Maternal in such a way.

it's moreso that i think it's nice that this little sarkaz merc became part of the story, a girl who all her life since she was infected at a young age, was presented with becoming a mercenary being basically the only option for her.

and then, as annoying as w can be, being shown that she does have different options.

i just think it's sweet that paprika, judging by her voicelines, clearly looks up to w and ines. which is just amplified by the fact that w and ines are notoriously not the most popular people on rhodes lol. and she calls w annoying but still keeps knitting stuff and wanting to gift food to her. like if she often seeks out w and ines to tell them how well she did on something, when they are on the ship, etc. that'd at least indicate that those two humor her.

ALSO IT'S UNOFFICIAL BUT SHOUTOUT TO THAT LITTLE CHUZENJI ART WITH PAPRIKA AND W, INES & TOTTER WEARING KNITTED HATS SO CUTE

OKAY WOO DARKNIGHTS MERCENARY TRIO AND STUFF

cool yeah obviously i fucking love them. i'm not very good at words though and i tend to keep my more elaborate thoughts to just discussions between friends who know how i tick djsfhdfs

just the other day i was smiling to myself during a walk bc holy shit all three are actually playable now and that's not just wishful thinking anymore. anyway chapter 13 also happened and more stuff with the trio happened and Cool Lots of things Happening and my brain is full

they're so found family to me, like in an utterly unconventional way. i mean c'mon with how they act sometimes like- ykno. but like have y'all seen the new furniture set and descriptions that came with hoederer's release it made me go insanse.

but i think especially in ines' case it just kinda highlights that best. considering ines' arts can figure people out (putting that in rather vague terms), it truly means something when someone with her capabilities and temperament has people she chooses to stick by and actually trust. even if she pretends she doesn't by verbally denying it.

like waugh Okay they have a lot to unpack and shit but with them being reunited (take that, W file that said W needs companionship but her friends aren't around anymore) and having a COMPARATIVELY more ""relaxed"" life than before (that one Hoederer file where he just has rather regular days on rhodes), it's just nice to imagine they can finally have something better and figure stuff out. as complicated as the three of them are.

with that said i think it's a given that i despise a nuclear family treatment of the three (aka mom ines, dad hoederer, daughter w).

for one with me being highly doubtful w was a kid/teen at the start of darknights (young? sure, but not that young), which just seems like such a...widespread belief that i really do not get? arknights always put a LOT of emphasis on when a character's story was about them being a kid, 0 of that with w. like something about her expression and big cloak just gave people some different impression, even though she literally keeps looking the same aside from a change of clothes. only instance of w being called a kid during that time i can think of is that one boiler worker in her files but that seems way more like any typical old guy calling anyone on the younger side a kid. hell, even hoederer was called young in darknights, like in a sarkaz's lifespan i can believe that.

and also...hoederer had somewhat of a mentor-like role for w, but if anyone tries to tell me ines ever acted maternal towards w i will chew through your walls. read through darknights memoir and actually pay attention to ines, both w AND ines were pettyass women and they made that so very clear. cannot fathom how anyone can see ines as having been motherly towards w

seriously just feels like a case of Well there is man and there is woman....and this other character so clearly these are mom, dad and kid.

that's not even me being biased towards w/ines, just how i objectively see it. hell, i even ENJOY ines/hoederer, but my enjoyment of it is limited bc for some reason ppl like to make it weird by shoving w in as some daughter. i promise it's completely possible to like ines/hoederer without trying to fit in w as a kid figure

anyways yeah like cool i like these characters I Guess. Look at them

#gaemms whistling #arknights #long post #this is horrendously written. #the worst part is i'll never do any of my favorite characters justice bc EXPRESSING IN WORDS IS THE HARDEST THING FOR M

[sandinthemachine]

OBSESSED WITH THE PROMPT LIST OMG.

can i pls get a #6 and #13 under fluff with a little #10 under smut for ghost 👀👀

Ok I'm actually really proud of this one. Hope you enjoy, anon!

Words: 2584

Warnings: Angst, fluff, mild smut (thigh riding)

-

It had been a hell of a month. What was supposed to be a week-long reconnaissance assignment had turned into a wild goose chase of body doubles and, if you were being honest, actual bodies. On top of it all, now that you were back you couldn’t sleep to save your life. Too busy thinking about nothing. And about everything. 

About the night in the safehouse after everything went to shit. The way Ghost’s hand had brushed over your back as he nudged you aside to take the first watch. You ought to rest. You look like hell.

About the way his voice had changed, pitched slightly higher, when you had dragged yourself back the next day with a broken radio and some nasty scrapes. Good to see you alive, love.

Love. He’d called you love. He’d never said that before.

He was English. They call half the girls they meet love. 

It didn’t mean anything.

It might just mean everything.

It was too much. Too much and not enough, and you were sick of it.

So here you were, sipping beer on the beat-up common room couch and texting an old friend. Well, you weren’t sure if ‘friend’ was the right word. You just knew ‘boyfriend’ wasn’t. It was a casual fling you’d started up the last time you were stationed here. He had been between jobs at the time, looking for some stress relief, and you had told him you were there on a business trip. It had been…nice. He was easy to talk to, blissfully ignorant of your real job, and happy to keep things no-strings-attached. 

After two miserably sleepless nights back, you had figured why not and messaged him again, fully expecting him to block you.

He’d responded immediately. Happy to hear from you, he’d said. Let me take you out sometime? Still casual, you thought. Just a little…less than before.

You let out a breath through your teeth, fingers hovering over the keyboard and the text you’d left on read all day. “Eh, what the hell,” you mutter to yourself.

What are you up to tonight?

Finishing up work. I can pick you up in an hour and a half?

No need. Tell me a place, I’ll meet you there.

You hope he still has the same bed, the magnificent king-sized mattress you could drown in. That would put you right to sleep. Well, that and an orgasm or two.

You smile at yourself. It doesn’t reach your eyes.

-

Ghost would never tell you directly, but he had been looking for you. You’d all but disappeared when everyone came back from the mission, sticking to your own barrack and making food in the microwave. He could hear the beeping through the wall, and knew you weren’t eating enough.

He had barely slept since the team had got back. Too busy remembering.

Remembering the way your eyes had stared back at him when he’d tackled you to the ground out of a sniper’s way. They’d been almost soft. Too soft for the brick-and-metal battlefield, shrapnel sharp and made to kill. Too soft for him, born to perfectly fit that battlefield. Born to die there, too.

Remembering the way your fingers had tightened around his wrist when he helped you up. Like he was a glass ornament, handled with gentle reverence. More than he had deserved. So much more.

You probably would have done the same with any of the men.

It didn't mean anything.

It meant everything.

The mission had failed on his watch. He was responsible for dealing with the fallout, even if it was just emotional. He was responsible for everyone on the mission. He’d do this for any of them.

So he kept telling himself.

By the time he found you, you were already heading out, rushing past him with a hasty nod. He catches a whiff of your perfume and forgets himself for a second, pausing to inhale.

The door is halfway closed behind you when he finally calls your name, and you freeze, eyes fixed on him.

“Where are you going?”

You shrug. “Out?”

His eyes scan your figure, the nice jeans you’d picked out, the silk shirt. You’d even done your hair. You looked…

You clear your throat, breaking him from his reverie. You’re giving him a confused look. “You okay, Ghost?”

He inhales again, wiggling his shoulders and squaring them again. He should ask where you’re going, he thinks, make sure you’re safe. No, that’s stupid, you can take care of yourself.

He wonders if your hair is as soft as it looks.

You look even more confused now, eyebrows coming together, and you finally let go of the door, stepping back inside towards him. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he grunts back without thinking, and you jump back.

“Oh, alright, well, then I gotta-”

“Wait,” he blurts, cutting you off. “You mind if…mind if I join you, love?”

You inhale sharply, clamping your mouth shut over your tongue. “Oh, I actually, uh, I’m…sorry, I’m meeting someone.”

He leans back as if you’d struck him, and you can see his shoulders tense even under his clothing.

You want to reach for him suddenly, but it feels wrong, so your fingers clench around themselves instead. “Simon, I-”

“Don’t.”

“Excuse me?”

“Don’t go on a date.”

Your words catch in your throat, lodging themselves tightly as your heart twists. He’s not serious. He doesn’t really mean it like that. “Why?” you choke out.

He takes a step towards you, leaning over you, dark eyes appraising all of you. “You know why.”

You shake your head at him, taking your own step forward, leaning up to his face. “Say it,” you whisper.

His eyes widen, and the fabric of his balaclava flexes as he opens his mouth.

And freezes. What if he says too much and scares you away? What if he says too little and you don’t understand? What does he even say? What if-

He looks away, fixing his eyes on the wall and trying to think.

Your heart drops at the movement.

With a sigh, you turn and walk out the door, closing it softly behind you. He makes no move to follow you.

-

The restaurant is a lot nicer than you expected. As is your date. He’d done his hair up, picked out his best button down and dress pants. All for you, he says, as he tells you his craziest work stories. Stuff like file cabinets getting knocked over and birds flying in through a window. You remember the time Soap got hit by a stray bullet flying through a window. Trying to shake the thought, you give your date a smile. It never reaches your eyes. He never notices.

When the food comes you find yourself eyeing the small portion, perfectly plated with a sauce drizzled artfully across it.

It reminds you of the time you’d gotten sick after a 12-mile ruck in the pouring rain. Ghost had raided the kitchen to make you soup, serving it to you with a bent spoon and a gruff apology. All we have, he’d mumbled.

The soup had been way too salty, the bowl way too big for you. You’d finished it all.

You curl your fingers around the fancy silverware, inlaid with intricate metal swirls. The delicate piece feels wrong in your calloused hands, reflecting the fingernails you’d finished scrubbing mud out of only an hour earlier.

The food is perfectly salted. You want to cry.

“Hey, you alright?” You look up to find your date leaning over the table, eyes wide and concerned. “Do you want to talk?”

All you can manage is a small shake of your head. “Sorry, I…I need to go.”

Your chair scrapes raucously against the fancy floor as you get up, and everyone turns to look at you, their perfectly manicured fingers clutching wine glasses. Gentle unmasked faces looking at you with concern. Fancy dress shirts and cocktail dresses crinkling as they turn to get a better view.

You storm out, your boots too loud, your steps too heavy, your shoulders set too stiffly, the muscles of your back flexing awkwardly against the soft fabric of a shirt tailored for someone much more…soft than you. Someone like them.

You hadn’t finished your food, hadn’t even thought to bring a jacket, and as the blast of cold outside air hits you a choked sound escapes your throat.

You won’t cry. Not like this. Not here. So you grind your teeth together, folding your arms tightly against your torso and marching forward. The walk is far less than 12 miles, and it’s not even raining. You’ll be fine.

-

You can’t feel your toes by the time you get back, shutting the door silently behind you and creeping into the kitchen for something, anything warm. You flip the light on, shaking and distracted.

He’s there. Of course he’s there. His head whips towards you as you stand there with your finger hovering over the light switch, your name falling from his lips unbidden.

He rises slowly, prowling towards you like a wolf, only to pause as he notices the spasms wracking your body. His hands reach out to take hold of your shoulders. “Fuck’s sake, love, you’re freezing.”

His hands feel like a furnace against you, and you sigh at the contact, closing your eyes and forgetting the world for a second, forgetting all about the past few hours. Even at arm’s length you feel the heat radiate from his body, and your eyes open again, flicking over his chest and up to meet his own.

He huffs, eyes scanning the room before opening his arms. “Come here, then.”

You practically leap into him, clutching his shoulders tightly and burying your face into his shirt. He bends a little, and you squeak a protest before feeling his arms wrap around your thighs and hike you up so you can wrap your legs around him as he carries you to your room, settling you down on your lumpy cot. Wordlessly he goes to your closet, pulling out all your extra blankets and wrapping them tightly around you before settling in behind you, pulling you against his chest. “You know,” he grumbles. “If you wanted my attention, you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

You scoff, shoving your shoulder into him. “What do you mean extremes?”

He sways at your push, tilting his head and giving you a look. “I mean storming out and freezing your ass off.”

“I did not-”

“You did,” he cuts you off, leveling a glare at you, but a second later his shoulders sink in a little and his eyes wander. “How was your…” he trails off, eyes meeting yours again.

You shrug. “Left early.”

“Why?”

You lean into him, inhaling the musky smell clinging to his clothes. Cologne and gunpowder and woodsmoke. “You know why.”

His grip on you tightens, but he keeps his eyes on you. Your body shifts as he heaves a great breath, releasing it through his nose. It tickles your eyelashes, and you bite your lip.

His gaze shifts down, focusing on the reddened skin where you work your lip between your teeth. When he speaks, it is barely above a breath. “You never let me finish earlier.”

You lean in closer, and he feels your breaths tickling the edge of his balaclava.

He tears his gaze up, raising a hand to cup your cheek as he looks into your widening eyes. “Don’t go on any more dates. Not unless,” he clears his throat, swallows, “unless I can come with you.”

Your teeth release your lip, the flesh popping outwards. “Simon Reilly,” you croon, and his breath hitches. “Are you asking me on a date?”

His chest heaves another large breath. “I am.”

“I could kiss you right now.”

His eyes fall to your lips again. “Then do it.” At your shocked expression he forces a huff of laughter, reaching up to shove his mask just high enough to reveal soft lips.

You pause at that, your fingers tracing up along his neck, thinking of your own chapped lips, beginning to worry.

But then he leans forward to meet you, and you stop thinking entirely.

He’s gentler than you thought he’d be, lips slowly moving against yours, one hand cradling the back of your head, the other snaking around your waist as he shifts you both, settling on the edge of the bed with you straddling one of his legs.

His mouth stays open just slightly when he pulls away, half-lidded eyes meeting your own, eyes so dark you can scarcely tell where the pupil ends and the iris begins. Or perhaps it’s all pupil. You’re sure yours are.

You lean into him, pulling him back in. His fingers run up your spine, causing your whole body to shiver, a vibration you feel straight in your core. He shifts, pulling you in closer, and his thigh flexes, rubbing against you, and you whimper.

He pulls back again, eyes glinting, and you smirk. The blankets have long since fallen off you, the cold creeping back into your bones. “You know,” you whisper. “I can think of some faster ways to warm me up.”

He chuckles. “I bet you could.”

You brace yourself on his shoulders, rubbing yourself against his thigh and shifting to guide his hand down.

He only tsks at you. “Not yet.” You make a frustrated sound, tightening your fingers around his wrist, but he only leans back, pulling his hands away to prop himself up on them. “Gotta warm up first, love,” he hums at you, grinning.

“Simon,” you plead.

“No whining,” he orders, voice taking on a gravelly undertone as his grin morphs into a smirk. “It’s my thigh or nothing, I’m not helping you get off.”

You huff, but bring your hands back to his shoulders, looking down as you slowly start to grind into him, gradually picking up your pace, your breathing beginning to hitch. He shifts, and you look up at him, his eyes watching you as he leans up again. A hand rests on your hips, another tangling in your hair. It’s even softer than it looks, he thinks, and before he knows it he’s breaking his own word, bouncing his leg into you, savoring your moans as he feels your fingers tighten around the muscles in his shoulders, shaking as you get yourself more worked up. You’re nearly frantic now, and he pulls your hips, grinding you into him harder, and finally you break with a cry, feeling a wave of heat wash over you as vibrations run up your core and your legs quiver.

You’ve barely recovered when his hands yank you flush against him and he twists, pinning you to the mattress with a growl.

“My turn.”

-

You wake the next morning to the mattress shifting as Simon settles down on the edge. You hadn’t even noticed him get up.

“I made you tea,” he grunts, turning to present you a chipped and faded old mug. “Only mug I have,” he grumbles, but you’re already sitting up and taking it from him.

“It’s perfect,” you hum, taking a sip. It’s just a little too sweet, and the chipped mug is a little too big, but the beat-up texture feels perfect in your rough hands. It’s all perfect. You give him a grin so big your eyes scrunch up at the corners.

Fucking hell, he thinks. How did I wait so long?

#cod #cod mwii #simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #ghost fanfiction #ghost x reader

[cyberwears]

He found his Peggy

Before Steve passed away he told (y/n) to “Find your Peggy.” Only after Steve’s funeral did he finally understand what he meant by: “Find your Peggy”.

Relationship: Bucky “James” Barnes X male!reader, Sam Wilson X male!reader (platonic)

Request: NO

Warnings: Mentions of grief, loss, broken hearts, mentions of wounds. Main character Death, surgery, mentions of ED, using sex as a form of coping (unsafely), mentions of homophobia

This one has a bit of a set up. I will not apologize for there the background though mainly angst with very little fluff. I am not/ was not in the military, so I apologize if anything is incorrect or inaccurate

(y/n) grew up alone. Never looking back or relying on people. Not once in his life did he think things were ever going to go his way. Lost his mother and father at a young age, lost his grandparents shortly after, being disowned by what was left of his family for being queer after they promised they would always stick together. (y/n) knew disappointment and resentment like that back of his hand, so he enlisted into the US Air Force to hopefully find something to do with his life. He hid who he was behind tattoos and a bulky front act for his “Military Family” as he liked to say. 

During his time he met Sam wilson. Sam broke his walls down and helped him heal. (y/n) told him about his issue and Sam responded in kind. This was the first time he could be real with someone and he felt like a person. Sam never got upset with him or condemned him for his emotions. It was quite the opposite and a lot of “Hey man, it's ok to have emotions. I’m here for you man. Whenever you need me, you know where to find me”. 

When (y/n) heard about Sam leaving due to personal reasons he cried, Hard. (y/n) felt like he was losing another brother. This shut down (y/n) again. He became a hard and solid soldier (not that he wasn't already.), quickly rising to the top of his class (for a lack of a better word). He sharpened his senses and stopped putting his trust in the people around the base and once again fell back into the cycle that was cynicism. 

The moment (y/n) got the notice he was being discharged he packed up his stuff very carefully. He was injured in the air and was forced to crash land the jet he was in. He was told by the Doctor that did the surgery that his heart stopped twice and he was very lucky to have made it though. After he made it back out into the work he moved to Washington DC to look for work. He found a pretty cheap apartment and settled in. He never really unpacked much, just some basic necessities. It looked like he never lived there, but if you looked closer you could see the small remnants of a military man. The bed was made a specific way, apartment always clean, bag stuffed under the bed, the shades always drawn closed to block the outside world out and keep him inside. He almost never slept on the bed, it was either the floor or the couch on an easy night. 

(y/n) suffered from his wounds. Physical and mental. It didn’t matter, it started to take a toll on him as he suffered from night terrors and paranoia. Once he was cleared by his physical therapist he started going on runs in the morning to clear his mind from the terrors that plagued his mind in his sleep. One morning he came across an Ad on a cork board outside of a shelter he frequently passed on his routine. It was an ad for group counseling for Veterans. Pushing aside the distrust for therapist and counseling he pulled a slip off the weathered and slightly crisp yellow paper and slipped it in his jacket pocket then went about his routine for the day. 

A few days later he stood in front of a builder that held the address that matched up with the one on the slip of paper he pocketed a few days before. A shiver ran down his spine as he took a deep breath and slowly opened the door, making his way inside. He slowly sat down towards the back and kept his head low before the session started. He was startled out of his daze when he heard a man speak up, a man he hadn’t heard from in 6 years. Sam Wilson. His head shot up in alarm as Sam started speaking to the group of veterans in the room. 

The session consisted of basic introductions and some people talking about how their experience in the service was. (y/n) kept to himself for most of it, only talking about how he had to force a land and ended up being discharged due to injury. After the session was over, (y/n) shakily rose to his feet and turned to leave. He heard Sam call out to him and jog over. 

“Hey man, nice to see you, it's been a while. How have you been?” The question caused (y/n) to freeze. Shit had gotten hard, not just hard but almost unbearable. “Honestly Sam, I just missed my best friend.” (y/n) retorted and pulled Sam into a bone crushing hug, silently wincing at the faint pain in his shoulder. (y/n) and Sam spent the day making up for the 6 years of absence and reconnecting over beer and greasy bar food. 

Over the next few months (y/n) and Sam fell into a routine. Morning jogs, lunch, afternoon counseling then went about their days. One morning went a bit differently. As Sam and (y/n) were out on their morning run they heard quick footsteps approaching them and a quick “To your left” as a man sped past them. This continued their whole run and (y/n) found it extremely annoying but he kept it at bay. When they finished the run Sam walked over to the stranger, (y/n) following closely behind. He stayed silent during the conversation (other than introducing himself). 

A few days later he was kicking it with Sam to pass the time after his shift at the music store by his apartment. He heard a knock on the door and hollered for Sam to get the door. He bristled when the door opened and he saw Steve Rogers and the redhead woman that picked him up standing in the doorway, looking rather banged up and exhausted. Sam let them in and told (y/n) to close the blinds. (y/n) did as Sam asked and grabbed towels for Steve and the Woman, Natasha so they could clean up. After they cleaned up and talked for a while they were filled in and told about Shield and Hydra (Which (y/n) had some knowledge about due to his military background). When they asked if they could help Sam immediately said yes but (y/n) was more apprehensive but eventually said yes. 

(y/n) had gotten severely injured during the battle in the helicarriers and was admitted to the hospital. Sam and Natasha regularly checked in with him, keeping him up to date about Steve’s condition and the news. After (y/n) was discharged from the hospital he packed up what little things were around his apartment and went over to Sam’s to let him know he was leaving for Brooklyn. (y/n) said it was for a change of pace but Sam knew better. They shared a hug and Sam promised to keep in touch. (y/n) over the next 2 years led a steady and quiet life, staying in the shadows and off government radars the best he could. That changed the day 50% of the Earth's population disappeared into thin air. After that he roped into helping hold meetings with Steve to help form a community and a safe place in the new and scary world that was so suddenly thrust upon them. (y/n) helped out around Avengers HQ where he could. During this time Steve and (y/n) got close while mourning Sam and Steve Mourning Bucky and Sam. They became as close as brothers. 

There was a day that (y/n) was getting a drink in the compound kitchen area and he heard a loud rumbling noise, Looking over at Steve he sent him a nod then booked it for the lawn area to see a ship (in rough shape) landing and a skinny, malnourished Tony Stark come fumbling out the ship. (y/n) heard Pepper gasp and ran to Tony to help him up and get him inside to receive medical attention. After Tony’s outburst at the table (y/n) excused himself and went to his apartment. (y/n) spent the night drinking and sobbing about all the people who had disappeared. 

Over the next 7 years (y/n) was in and out of the compound to keep Steve company or work. One day when he was at the compound he Heard Tony storm in saying that he figured out time travel and that they could reverse what had happened. That caused (y/n) to perk up with interest and he helped Bruce the best he could to get something set up so they could do it properly and retrieve the stones. (y/n) stayed behind and monitored the area and kept an eye on the screens. Everyone came back, except Natasha. He watched in horror as Clint broke down in silent sobs. (y/n) felt his stomach drop, Natasha wasn’t quite a sister but they were close in the last 9 years since the mission in Washington. Bruce took charge and snapped, reversing the Blip.

The next thing (y/n) knows he is standing side by side with Steve on the battlefield, across from Thanos and his army. A handful of monsters and a power hungry alien that was trying to get the stones. (y/n) sent a silent plea for strength and help before looking towards Steve, who sent him a stoic look. 

“To your left” said an all too familiar voice into (y/n) and Steve’s earpiece as thousands of orange portals opened, thousands of people came out of the portals. The only one that mattered to (y/n) was Sam who came flying next to him before landing. “Are you really here?” (y/n) asked, his voice quiet and choked. “I am here brother. I’m here.” Sam said before hugging (y/n), something the two didn’t do regularly before turning back to Steve to await the call to rush into action. Steve made the call and the battle commenced. 

They ended up winning, but at the cost of Tony. Everyone on the field took a knee and a violent hush fell over the chaos that surrounded him, cut by sniffles and the cries from loved ones. They held a funeral at Tony’s lakehouse and Steve volunteered to take back the stones. (y/n) had a bad gut feeling about it but waited with Bucky and Sam by the lake side. As Bruce looked in confusion when Steve didn’t return, (y/n) saw Bucky’s shoulders fall slightly. (y/n) then realized that Steve never planned on returning to the present day. (y/n) turned towards Bucky and placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder in sympathy, Bucky glanced at (y/n) as he pointed to the lake side. There was an old man resting on the bench and Bucky looked down with a soft smile but a pained look in his eyes, something (y/n) was all too familiar with. (y/n) and Bucky looked over at Sam who was walking over to Steve who was sitting on the bench. The two were in deep conversation. (y/n) watches with Bucky as Sam picks up the shield and finishes his conversion with Steve. (y/n) looked over at Bucky, who sighs and looks down in contemplation. “Don’t force yourself to do anything you don’t want to.” (y/n) whispered then nodded to Steve, who sent him a small wave. 

Over the next few years (y/n) kept in touch with Steve who consistently asked if (y/n) had found anyone who only got back a snarky “now that you're old, you are so nosy” and a laugh. Steve always told (y/n) to look out for Bucky and Sam, which he did. He and Bucky became closer. Not as close as Sam or Steve but they became friends. In this time (y/n) slowly took notice of things he never did before. The way Bucky’s eyes lit up when talking to Steve, the nostalgia that overtook Bucky’s features when Steve told him about The Howling Commandos, the way Bucky's eyebrows furrow when he was in deep thought, how Bucky bites his cuticles when he thinks no one is looking, it was little stuff but it meant something to (y/n). During one visit with Steve, (y/n) was talking about something and Steve looked at him as (y/n) told him about some story that happened last week with Bucky. 

Steve chuckled and (y/n) stopped mid sentence. “What was that about?” (y/n) asked as he returned focus to Steve. “You’re in love with him.” Steve said with a soft smile. (y/n) choked on air. “I am sorry? Me? In love with Bucky?” He said. “I know that look and the way you talk about him is how I talk about Peggy. You have to find your Peggy.” Steve said, leaving (y/n) dumbfounded. This soon became sort of a catchphrase for Steve. It was always “find your Peggy. Life is short, make the most of it.” and (y/n) took it to heart. 

When Bucky got the phone call that Steve had passed he rushed over to (y/n)’s apartment to tell him. (y/n) had heard the news already and was asked to be a paul bearer. He said yes and looked to Bucky for emotional support. The two of them grieved together and helped plan the funeral. (y/n) openly cried at the burial while Bucky was more put together, but (y/n) knew Bucky was just as torn up as he was. 

(y/n) was asked to speak at the funeral. He told the story of how he met Steve and he was a good man and an even better guy. “When I would visit Steve he would always, without fail, pry into my love life, or lack thereof. He noticed the small things y’know. I would sit differently and he would notice. He also always told me to ‘Find your Peggy, and to always cherish them because life is short. Make the most of it’.” (y/n) said as he started to break down again. After the crowd had dispersed, (y/n) stayed and talked to the casket that held Steve’s body. He cried and told him that he would miss him, then he talked about how he finally understood what he said about finding his peggy. (y/n) told the Casket that he loved Bucky and he would always keep him in his heart even if he didn’t love him back. He laid a small white Chrysanthemum on the casket and turned to leave, only to see Bucky back by a tree, talking to a younger girl who was consoling him. 

(y/n) felt his heart rip in two when he saw Bucky slip an arm around her waist and walk away from the grave side. His head was fuzzy and he felt like the wind was knocked from his lungs as he took cautious steps towards his car. When (y/n) got his head together he drove away in silence from Bucky and the grave sight. (y/n) choked down tears the whole way home, only allowing himself to cry after he got the door locked and laying on the floor, not even making it to his own room. The next morning he felt sore from laying on the floor, his mouth dry and head pounding from crying. He slowly got up and made his way to the kitchen to get some water and pain killers to alleviate his headache. He checked his phone to see a few texts from Bucky and a missed call from him. The texts were asking where he had disappeared off to and one saying goodnight.

(y/n) checked the voice mail from the missed call. “Hey (y/n), it’s Bucky. I was just wanting to check in and see how you were doing. You seemed pretty shaken when you left. Call me back when you can. Remember we have lunch tomorrow. See you then, Take care” Bucky’s voice played back through the phone. (y/n) sighed and deleted the message. He went and hopped in the shower, washing off the grime from yesterday and to recenter himself. He slipped on a pair of jeans with boots and a plain cotton T-shirt. Grabbing his keys and phone. He locked his apartment door and left. 

(y/n) went to the diner they planned on meeting at for lunch. When he walked up to the door he saw Bucky and the girl from yesterday sitting at a table, talking about something. She said something that caused Bucky to laugh, (y/n) took notice of how Bucky threw his head back and the way his lips stretched into a smile as he laughed. (y/n)’s body shook a little as his feet practically glued himself to the pavement outside the diner. Taking a deep breath (y/n) made his way inside and over to them. When Bucky saw him, he stood up and gave him a one armed side hug and motioned for him to sit. (y/n) sits down and Bucky falls into a natural conversation with the Woman across from him. Bucky looks over at (y/n) and furrows his eyebrows. “I forgot to introduce you, this is Ellie. My girlfriend. Ellie, this is one of my close friends, (y/n).” Bucky said as he took a drink from his cup. 

“It's nice to meet you, (y/n).” Ellie said, shifting in her seat. “Likewise” (y/n) responded before ordering water. (y/n) felt his heart crack a bit more as he saw the way Bucky was interacting with Ellie. (y/n) ordered his food and ate, making the occasional comment then going quiet and eating. (y/n) felt out of place, he felt like a third wheel. When lunch ended he quickly left. Only when he got home did he start breaking down again as he felt his soul being crushed. 

Now he understood why Steve said to “find your peggy.”. He waited too long and now He was gone. 

(y/n) spent the next few months in agony. At night he went out and partied or went to whatever bar was close to his current location. He took  whatever girl or guy that showed any interest in him back to their place and hooked up with them, only to leave in the morning before the other person woke up. (y/n) ate less and ended up losing some weight. He wasn’t rail thin but he didn’t exactly look physically healthy. He always went and got checked to make sure he didn’t catch anything. This became his new routine. He was trying to force his feelings for Bucky away. 

One night as he grabbed his keys to go out for the 4th time this week he heard a knock on the door. (y/n) huffed quietly then made his way to the door. When he answered it he was not expecting to see Bucky, tear stained face and eyes rimmed red that made the blue in them more prominent. 

“Ellie left me” was all he said before breaking down, leaning on (y/n)’s shoulder. (y/n) felt his heart crack again for the first time since he started going out. (y/n) sighed out and let bucky in, guiding to the stools in his kitchen and making him sit down. (y/n) moved fluidly through the kitchen and grabbed a couple beers from his mostly empty fridge and opened one before passing it to Bucky then turning away to the sink. With shaky hands (y/n) opened his own beer and took a drink from it for courage, then he turned to face Bucky only to meet his eyes. Bucky was studying (y/n)’s body language. 

“Stop that.” (y/n) snapped as he leaned against the counter. “Stop what?” Bucky said as he looked back to the counter. “You’re analyzing me, my movements, and probably how I breathe.”  (y/n) said as he pulled himself up on the counter, not looking away from the man in front of him. “You haven’t contacted me or Sam in months. I was worried about you.” He said and sagged his shoulders. 

“Yea well a phone works both ways. Sam has been busy and you had Ellie. I didn’t want to interrupt them. She didn’t like me very much when you introduced us so I backed up and stayed out of it.” (y/n) said and ran a hand through his hair then picked at the hem of his own shirt. (y/n) leaned back, resting his back against the cabinet  behind him and looked over towards Bucky. “Why did you come here? Other than Ellie?” (y/n) whispered. “I missed you man. Isn’t that enough. Not everyone has ulterior motives. I just wanted to see my friends. Is that an issue?” Bucky said, his voice breaking and looking down. 

“Of course not. I just had plans tonight.” (y/n) said and Bucky’s head snapped up in anger. “Yeah like what? Going out and fucking the closet person avalible? You know you aren’t as careful as you think you are. I have seen you leaving clubs and bars with people, I have seen the hickeys and the marks left by people who don’t even know your name.” Bucky snapped and Stood up suddenly. 

“Oh, you’re my mother now? Look. James, not that it’s any of your fucking business but its how I cope. Don't like it? Leave.” (y/n) said, anger building in his chest. Bucky made his way around the counter and stood between (y/n)’s legs, caging him in his spot on the counter. 

“What are you so scared of? What are you running from? Why didn’t you think to talk to me or Sam? We could help you, but you have to let us help you.” Bucky said and locked eyes with (y/n). “This issue isn’t yours to fix” (y/n) growled out. “Try me (y/n). I’ve been through more shit than you can imagine.” Bucky said as he grabbed (y/n)'s wrist. “Not this one. isn't your problem, Believe me.” “Then tell me. Please, I can’t lose you.” Bucky said, his blue eyes softened as he moved closer to (y/n), his face inches away from (y/n)’s. 

‘Fuck, this is bad. If I don't say something Bucky won’t give up. Make something up for fucks sake.’ (y/n) thought as he reached out, gripping Bucky’s shirt. “I am in love with you.” (y/n) whispered, barely audible. ‘You fucking idiot. Out of all the things you could have said you chose that one?’ (y/n) thought bitterly as he looked away from Bucky, mentally preparing for rejection. 

Bucky felt his face heat up and stumbled over his thoughts for a second, his head and tongue not agreeing on what to say. “I’m sorry? Repeat that?” Bucky stammered out and turned (y/n)'s face to look at him. “Fuck! What else is there to say James? I am in love with you. These past few months I have been trying to get over my feelings for you and got lost.” (y/n) repeated, on the verge of tears. 

(y/n) went to push Bucky away from him until he felt Bucky’s lips touch his in a fury. Their teeth clashing, Bucky’s stubble digging into (y/n)’s face. (y/n) kissed him back, gripping Bucky’s shirt and wrapping his legs around his waist to root Bucky to his spot in front of him. After they break for air (y/n) looks at Bucky. “Bucky, stop. You are upset and going through a break up. You don’t understand what you’re doing” (y/n) says goes to move, Bucky grips (y/n)'s arm harder and prevents him from moving. “You will not be the person who tells me I don’t know what I am doing. I am not the one who is drowning in loveless hookups. You are. You can’t even come out of your haze long enough to see that people are worried and care. That I care.” Bucky said before he let go of (y/n) and stepped away. At that moment (y/n) started crying and looked away from Bucky in shame. 

Just as he was able to maybe bury his feelings for Bucky, he had shattered that possibility. “Then prove it, Buck.” (y/n) said as he pushed himself off the counter and leaned onto Bucky’s chest. Bucky sighed and looked down at (y/n), wrapping his arms around him and holding him tight. “I will. I promise” He said, pressing a kiss to (y/n)'s head.

#bucky barnes x reader #x male reader #mcu fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #steve rogers #sam wilson #winter soldier #fanfiction #angst

[artist-issues]

Ok, I've been thinking about your wish posts for quite some time, and I’m very confused, can't seem to follow them. Magnifico's main philosophy is to forget without regret (he, like Faciler, is taking the easy route of life).

Even if a goal doesn't come true or you give up, you should still reconcile with those scars, grow, and let them heal naturally. You say the star thing is sacrificial, but it's not saying Asha is a literal star; she's connected to stardust; it more evokes how God says we are made in the image of him (we are obviously not god, but we are all connected to him and his children).  

Putting aside that, I don't think this movie is religious at all, and I find the implication insane. I think Star is more god, and Magnifico is a false idol and a corrupt leader. Asha sings the lyrics, so I look up at the stars to guide them, much like how the shepherds followed the stars to Bethelheman.

Taking the lyrics of at all costs into account, I'll promise, as one does, I'll protect you at all costs. He's locking them up and stealing their souls, and he wants to seal his people's desire to live so he can achieve ultimate power.

When Asha says I'm a star, she's saying anyone should spread peace and reflect on their scars, and the wishes that are dangerous can be stopped, so if society (Magnifco) decides you are useless or not needed in society, do you listen?

Well, God would never say people's autonomy is useless, like Magnifico, nor do you have to grant everyone's wish, but you can't determine people's way of living or their souls. With no offense, I find your analysis posts to be rather anti-human and I’m curious if you have any answers to these points

First:

Every story is presenting a worldview. If you present a worldview, that worldview WILL come into conflict with other worldviews that say the opposite thing.

Wish may not be saying a word about any one religion—but by presenting the philosophy that human beings have the power of the stars in them, from the star matter inside of them—it is in conflict with several religious worldviews.

"Powerful Stardust Inside Humans" an actual "religion/"worldview out here in the real world. It's founded in the "big bang theory," which as far as I know, guesses that the ancient stars of the universe were made up of helium, lithium, and hydrogen. Then the other elements (the ones that make up us) allegedly gradually formed inside of those, then allegedly blasted all throughout the galaxy during the Big Bang. Therefore, allegedly, life on planet earth is made from star debris, or "stardust."

Then New Age believers take that a step further and decide that this means that a spiritual connection is between us and the stars, which are powerful, because of their religious astrological beliefs.

Which is exactly what Wish is also presenting, as a worldview, in "I'm a Star!" and in every moment where Asha claims she can understand what Star is trying to tell her, and in every moment where the effects artists specifically caused characters' chests to glow with a Star sparkle. Real people in real life believe that real stardust in humans gives them real power.

And that belief is either based on truth, or it's not. People who believe it are either wrong, or they're right.

Because other worldviews believe the opposite of both the New Age idea that stardust has supernatural power, and the opposite of the Big Bang.

Christians, as you know, believe that the world was created (and Earth, which mankind was formed out of, was created before the stars) by the word of Yahweh. They believe the Big Bang Theory is false. They believe that worshipping creations like stars through astrology, or attributing any supernatural power to humans, is false and also wrong.

Other worldviews besides Christianity also don't believe in the Big Bang, or astrology, or New Age spiritualism. But Wish framed Star and the whole "I'm a Star!" song as if these things are the truth...meaning, everything else is not true.

So you can say it had nothing to say about religion, but just by presenting a worldview that is contrary to many religions...it is saying something about religion. It is saying religion is incorrect. Passive-aggressively. But still saying it.

Second:

Star does not represent the God of the Bible in any way.

As I've said before, Star is presented as a higher power, because he is blatantly connected to the wishing stars of other Disney movies—which have been higher powers—but then he's able to be defeated. He's trapped easily by Magnifico. He is unable to rescue himself and has to be rescued by everyone else.

Nothing about that is like the God of the Bible.

Additionally, he's just one star. I feel like everybody is acting like there aren't other stars in the sky—the movie never presents Star the character as the only powerful godlike being in the heavens—in fact, the movie has a line from Asha's father about how "the stars (plural) are there to guide us." There's only one God, the God of the Bible specifically claims to be the only higher power.

Plus, even if Wish were saying that Star is the only wishing star, as a parallel to God's exclusive existence...he does nothing to "guide" Asha.

He doesn't suggest a path for her to take. She just decides she wants to go get Sabino's Wish back, and Star does cute little antics like any super-powered sidekick might to help out, and then she gets Sabino's wish back. Then later, he gives her magical tools that wind up being no help at all—she gets captured by Magnifico anyway. In the climax, he just sort of...pushes on the wishes, then gets sucked into a staff. He very simply does nothing super-helpful. He's just the regular amount of ordinary-helpful to Asha.

Besides, when we say a higher power "guides a character," we usually mean that they offer the hero a choice, and that choice challenges the character to choose what they need instead of just what they want. Like the Blue Fairy (the original wishing star) or Mama Odie. They aren't with the heroes every step of the way, jumping in to do part of the work of the adventure. Jumping in and doing part of the work is what Ray the firefly or Jiminy Cricket do. Star jumps in and does part of the work, like a sidekick; he does not give guidance or direction or a challenge that deepens the hero like the Blue Fairy, or Mama Odie, or The Enchantress. And like I said, he's nothing like God—

—except that he's presented like a higher power who gives guidance, only to actually do the opposite of that, which is a commentary on how the creators of Wish see "higher powers." I can't explain it any more clearly than that.

Also, just for point of reference, the phrase "made in God's image" does not line up at all with Asha's "connection" to Star. Because like I just said, Star's set up like he's supposed to be a higher power but then fails, so he's not that high of a power. Asha's "connection" to Star is a direct link to real New Age Evolutionary spirituality—they say, word-for-word, what New Age Evolutionary Spiritualists say in real life in the song "I'm a Star!"

Which is it: is the movie not religious at all, or is Star God while Magnifico's a false idol?

See, you can't even talk about Wish without acknowledging that it says something about higher powers, I.e. God.

I've already explained why Star isn't an accurate representation of the God of the Bible: he's more an accurate representation of what humanists believe about higher powers: they believe we're all "higher powers." (Which is to say, everyone is powerful and nobody, not stars or gods or nature, is higher than humans.)

But listen—they borrowed the idea of "look up at the stars to guide me" from several different places. One, yes, the Bible. Two, all of navigational history, which uses stars like maps. Three, astrology, which believes that stars give literal spiritual guidance and have an effect on everything that happens on earth. So no. It wasn't a direct one-to-one comparison to the wise men who followed the star to Bethlehem.

Your Claims About What the Movie is Saying:

"He wants to steal people's desires to live" - No, he doesn't, that's not in the movie. All the adults in Rosa's no longer have their wishes; none of them act depressed or suicidal. Not even Asha's mother, after her wish is literally crushed in front of her.

"When Asha says I'm a star, she's saying anyone should spread peace and reflect on their scars" - That's just a theory of yours; it's not supported by the movie. Nobody in the movie wrestled with "their scars." Not even Magnifico. The movie just hints that he lost something in his past—it never fully fleshes out that he's still upset by that, or afraid of losing anything he cares about except power. Asha's father is dead, but other than one line about how nobody should have to live with that pain (which is the opposite of "reflecting" on scars) the loss of her father is never treated like a deep emotional wound she needs to acknowledge or overcome. It's never mentioned again in the movie.

The thing is, none of your points are supportable from what's in the movie. You're reading more meaning into it than the movie actually has—and some of that meaning, the movie itself contradicts.

About how my posts are anti-human:

They're not anti-human. They're anti-humanist, maybe. I don't believe humans are the center of everything. I don't believe they are just as powerful as "higher powers." The point of "higher" powers is that they're HIGHER than what? Higher than humans.

God absolutely does determine what's right and wrong; He invented "right." And He does judge people's lifestyle, and their souls. Sure, Magnifico had no right to do that—but you know what, it's not because "nobody should decide how an individual lives except the individual themselves!" —it's because Magnifico is human. So he doesn't get to judge. God however? God gets to judge. God gets to decide. And He always makes the right decision.

#Wish #asked #answered #discourse #wish 2023 #wish movie #animation #Disney #Mets #Christianity #Magnifico

[kdval]

Let's talk about a Plague Tale Requiem

So I'm currently working on some post for reddit, and I was analyzing the ending and post-credit chapter again, but since my thoughts don't match with topic, I'll leave it here.

Spoilers ahead obviously.

Even though the ending was heartbreaking, plot-wise it was really good ending. Well, the devs were quite honest with us from the very beginning. I mean, what we could expect from the game named REQUIEM. Like, obviously. Even the last trailer was straight. "His mind is... extinguished." Remember that line? I watched it million times, so yeah, I remember too well.

Anyway. There's one thing that leaved me quite upset, if not disappointed. And one thing that leaved me confused.

 1. Lucas.

We have this, let's say, leitmotif playing throughout the whole game: Lucas is our support. He's WITH us, whatever happens. We hear several lines, when Lucas says that Amicia is not alone. He's here for her.

Then there's little dialogue, when Amicia says that Lucas must choose side eventually. Well, there, on the boat, he chose Beatrice, ok. We later got Sophia as a mother figure for our siblings (especially for Amicia ofc). Arnaud... eh, imo he has too little "screen time", and he definitely didn't replace Lucas. Sure, who can replace our best boiii? But jokes aside: we have lost Lucas for several chapters. God knows how everything would turn out, if Lucas was there.

Like, think about. He is the calmest person in our team. I don't remember any moment (except for prison dialogue maybe), when Lucas lost control like Amicia throughout the game. Beatrice is angry at Amicia sometimes, she confronts her own daughter instead of helping her (man, Amicia is 15yo, right?), Amicia is desperate, traumatized, Hugo is frightened, frustrated... And Lucas is trying to put everything together.

But OK. He returns. In the very moment we need him - Lucas returns. And he keeps saying Amicia that she's not alone. Hugo inside Nebula says that Amicia is not alone. And then Lucas appears. Lucas is the one who goes with her there, who wakes her up, who hugs her, who gives her a hand... He even kills Hugo, if Amicia can't find the strength to do that.

But Lucas is not here, when we see post-credit chapter. If I understand the dialogue correctly, Sophia didn't live with Amicia either. Amicia lived there alone? Completely? Lucas just studies alchemy somewhere...

We were told the whole game, that we always have someone, who cares about us, who can support us, and then Amicia find herself alone in the mountains? So Asobo took even Lucas away from us? I don't get it. The way the plot led us this whole time... It doesn't make sense to me.

I don't think that the 16yo traumatized girl can handle it alone. It's not good idea. I experienced severe panic attacks myself (like Amicia had in 3rd chapter) – going through this without support is real hell.

Even though we have Sophia back – this ending is quite frustrating.

 2. Happy life plan.

It's confusing me. Now hear me out.

Amicia put Hugo through the real hell. They found the previous Carrier and Protector dead. They found out that they just need to stay together and live in peace to avoid that end... probably. But the thing is – we already saw them living in peace back then, in Chateau d'Ombrage. Hugo almost reached the threshold, but thanks to Lucas they delayed something really bad.

In Requiem magister Vaudin says there's no elixir to heal Hugo and the boy will die after reaching the last threshold.

So basically living a calm life in the mountains – is just the way to Hugo to die at peace eventually. Since they didn't find any cure.

But I still don't see it as an option. Hugo is hyperactive kid. Just an average kid actually. He loves to explore, to collect things, he loves fairs, people there. He can't live in the mountains like a hermit.

But there, outside that little house in the mountains, there's the thing we quite forgot about. It's the war.

It's Hundred Years' War. And whatever it brings with. Cause "bad people" Amicia talk about with Hugo – it's a consequence of the war too. Innocence was more focused on the war, while Requiem – on Macula itself (and little breaks like fair, sea travel, island, celebrations, all that).

I can recall just 3 things that remind us a bit about the war:

A) well, rats, no need to explain;

B) Arnaud – war veteran from Guyenne, and his people marauding everywhere;

C) the Count, also war veteran (and you can clearly see how war broke him in that "duel" scene with Amicia).

Other than that – we don't really think about the war, we have bigger problem to worry about.

So "living peacefully in the mountains" is really nice and sweet, but a bit naive. Hell, Amicia and Hugo ran into trouble even when they just played in the abandoned castle.

And since Macula feeds on Hugo's emotion, he needs something that can distract him. Like Amicia said to Sophia that she worked hard all these months, tried to exhaust herself. Hugo eventually will be upset he still has no friends (and Lucas is not much of a playmate, he studies all the time). So they still need to go outside, meet people, and you never know, when another beekeepers or something worse will show up, and the war is almost on the doorstep… you know what I mean.

Anyway, that's my thoughts. Feel free to beat the shit out of me, if I'm wrong.

#a plague tale #a plague tale requiem #aptr #lucas #lucas the apprentice #lucas x amicia #amicia #just thoughts

[eunchancorner]

Ok this might be a bit out of the ordinary, but bear with me pls. Ler Bob and Lee Kevin. Hear me out! The candy teases and methods Bob could use

‘You taste sweeter than candy’ while nibbling

I guess this could take place where Bob isn’t a murderous cannibal?(This popped in my head and I found it cute I’m sorry)

Feel free to take this as a request if you want. If not, have a good day :D

BIG BRAIN- Oki oki so yea I saw this AU floating around where Bob is more like an uncle or babysitter to Skid and Pump so let’s just say this is that. And he’s also friends with Kevin (and, ofc, Streber) bc yes

Ler Bob, Lee Kevin (Also a bit of Ler Streber and Lee Bob)

Warning: A lot of cussing lmao

Word count: 1092

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Kevin stood from the couch with a slight groan as he heard a knock at the door, leaving the movie he had been watching playing in the background. He walked over to the door of his small apartment, opening it and being scooped into a big, warm hug before he knew what was happening.

Of course, it didn’t take much for him to understand. Him, Bob and Streber had been planning a movie night for some time now and tonight was the fateful night. The movies Kevin had been watching were far less realistic horror movies to help him prepare himself (he seemed to be the only one in this damn town who struggled with watching horror movies) and Streber had gone out to get more candy, knowing how much it’d be appreciated. Kevin would have been working but thankfully he had a day off today, so Streber had gone to the grocery store and wouldn’t be back for a while. And, of course, Bob had offered to make dinner for the night, stopping by the grocery store himself and picking up some steak on the way to Kevin’s place.

Bob had apparently decided to hug him before saying a single word, which was pretty typical for him. After the hug, he set Kevin back on his feet, a grocery bag dangling from his hand that no doubt contained their dinner for the night.

“Kevin, nice to see you again. Where’s your lil’ boyfriend?” he asked, his height allowing him to easily see over his friend and into the otherwise empty apartment.

“He’s out buying candy for us, since we figured with you around, we’d probably need more,” Kevin explained, stepping aside so Bob could come in.

“Aw, c’mon, I don’t eat that much candy!”

“Last year you ate me, Streber’s AND your candy!”

“Can ya blame me? You two weren’t gonna finish it anyway,” he argued as he put the steak in the fridge, before he sat down on the couch, Kevin sitting beside him. He snorted a little at the movie he had put on.

“Is this really what you’re watchin?” he asked, smirking a bit at the small blush he saw rising on his friend’s cheeks.

“Listen, horror movies aren’t my thing, so I’m trying to mentally prepare myself.”

“For what? Shitty CGI and the most fake-lookin props? Trust me, you’re gonna wanna try some real horror movies to steel yourself. This ain’t gonna cut it,” he told him, poking the much shorter man in the forehead. Kevin swatted his hand away, growling slightly.

“If I can’t prepare myself with bad horror movies, how am I gonna prepare at all?” he countered, both nervous and a little fed-up.

“What, you can’t take a little horror? Poor Kevin, are you gonna scream at a little monster?~” Bob teased his tiny (in comparison) friend, making him huff.

“No but… grrr, you’re such an ass,” he complained, attempting (without much success) to shove at the far taller man. Of course, a false offended gasp was the first sign to Kevin that he had fucked up.

“Did you just try to shove me?”

“W-waitwaitwait, Bob, I-I know what you’re thinking, but hear me out!” Kevin panicked, a small smile worming onto his face as he backed into the corner of his couch, already well aware of what his friend had in mind.

“One chance.”

Ok Kevin, don’t fuck this up. DON’T tell him he’s an ass AGAIN out loud. Don’t do it, don’t do it!

“You’re an ass.”

GODDAMMIT.

“Ohohoho, you just fucked up,” Bob stated as though Kevin didn’t already know, grabbing his arm and yanking him closer, pinning him to his chest before using his free hand to claw at his ribs, making the much smaller squeal.

“NAAHAHAHOHOHOHO BOHOHOB! LEHEMME GOHOHO! LEMME GO!” the small ravenette kicked and cackled, pounding his free hand into the chest that entrapped him on one side. He almost hated the way the warmth of his friend’s sweater made him wanna just melt and take it. But at the same time, it tickled so badly and he couldn’t help the instinct to squirm and kick.

“Aw, poor lil candy kid, can’t even take a few tickles?~” the much bigger ravenette teased softly, delighting in the flustered squeal Kevin let out. “Streber must love doin this~”

“SHUHUHUHUT!” said ‘candy kid’ demanded, slamming his hand into Bob’s stomach a little harder than he should have, enough to get him to stop with an “Oof!”

As it slowly loaded into Kevin’s mind what just happened, he looked up at his friend.

Oh fuck.

“Alright that’s fucken IT!”

Before he knew what was happening, the world was moving fast around him and suddenly he was staring at the ceiling, his shirt pulled up past his belly and a certain huge friend playfully nibbling at the exposed tum. He squealed and kicked and pushed at his friend’s head, cackles once again flowing from his lips at just how much it tickled, and Bob’s slight little beard and stupidly fluffy hair only made his situation worse!

“BAHAHAHAB! AHAHA I’M SAHAHAHAREEHEHEHEHE!! PLEHEHEHEASE!” he begged fruitlessly.

“Mmmm” Bob rumbled against his belly, making him squeal brightly yet again, “I might not need that candy, you’re even sweeter~”

“PLEHEHEHEASE!! IHIT TIHIHICKLES SOHOHO BAHAHAD!!”

“Promise to stop callin me an ass and then hurtin me?”

“YEHEHEHES! I PROHOHOHOMIHIHISE!!”

“You sure?~”

“BOHOHOHOHOB!!”

“Fine, fine,” the taller finally let up, laying the smol candy store worker on the couch and getting up to make dinner. Kevin tried his best to regain composure, wiping away tears of mirth, trying to quiet his giggles and will away blush, and letting the tingles in his belly subside. Only a few seconds after Bob left, he heard the door open and that familiar voice.

“Baby, I’m hooome! I got pl- uhh… Did Bob do this?” Streber asked as he saw what had become of his poor, ticklish boyfriend, who nodded tiredly.

“Of course he did. Stay here, guard this, I’ll be back in a few seconds!” he instructed him as he handed him the candy and kissed his forehead before he went into the kitchen.

“Bob! What have I told you about tickling my boyfriend!?” a falsely enraged yell came from the kitchen, one that definitely belonged to Kevin’s dear lover.

“What- wait- S-Streber, I’m cookin STREBER NOHOHO!!” Of course, Kev was never gonna warn Bob of exactly how much revenge he was gonna get. That was for him and him alone to find out.

Though it was fun to listen to.

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Ah, beautiful bois. Also dw about Kevin, they ended up watching action comedies.

#eun writes #sm #spooky month #sm tickles #spooky month tickles #sm kevin #spooky month kevin #sm streber #spooky month streber #sm bob #sm bob velseb #spooky month bob #spooky month bob velseb #bob velseb #ler!bob #lee!kevin #ticklish!kevin

[queefinginmybasement]

In defense of Mal

Everyone in the Descendants fandom LOVES to shit on Mal 24/7 and although I understand part of where they are coming from, they turn a blind eye to the possible reasons behind most of her actions. Here are a list of things people like to criticize her for and my take on them:

(Potential TW? Slight mentions of abuse, being taken advantage of, drugged, being killed)

She's a bully

Now yes, in the first movie and in the first book Mal is a little bitch, but she has reason. Mal is Maleficent's daughter, (AKA the worst villain in the land) , do you think she was brought up surrounded by kindness? Obviously not. Mal was raised to be evil so obviously she's going to do "evil" things.

Even if we put the fact that she's Maleficent's daughter aside, she was also raised on the Isle, a place where any sort of kindness was scene as a weakness and could possibly get you killed.

Do you think that someone who spent 16 years in an environment where they were taught to be vicious and cruel is going to drop all that knowledge just because they spent 5 minutes in Auradon? No.

She ran away from her issues with Ben instead of talking to him about them

As previously stated Mal is the daughter of Maleficent who was born and raised on the Isle. Do you think she was taught how to communicate her feelings? No. If anything she was probably faced with some sort of abused (verbal or physical) if she tried to oppose Maleficent.

It's pretty evident that the villains aren't the best parents (Cruella for example is canonically a child abuser). And although there was no mention of Maleficent being abusive in the movies, (unless you count in D1 when Mal briefly describes Maleficent getting extremely angry as a hint towards some type of abuse) , we can only assume based on what we know of her character and the little we know of her as a mother that she wasn't the greatest (also Mal was seen flinching more than once throughout the films which could be hinting towards something).

So you take an potentially abused 16 year old girl and throw her into a relationship with THE KING OF AURADON where she is obviously going to feel pressured to live up to some sort of expectation and expect her to have 10/10 communication skills? Yeah ok.

Mal drugged Ben

While yes, this is technically true, the way people write out the situation is sorta extra. I've seen multiple people say that mal was using Ben, that she continued to give him love potion cookies after the enchanted lake, Ben doesn't really love Mal, etc. Which if you payed any attention to the movies you would see is false.

Ben knew Mal spelled him yet willingly chose to be with her. He had multiple opportunities to get rid of Mal if he wanted to but he didn't because he loves her and vice versa. Yes, at the beginning she was using him to get to the wand, but those of us who payed attention to the movie watched her fall in love with him and realize that being evil wasn't what she wanted.

l've also seen a lot of people say that "Mal never told Ben the real reason she spelled him". How do we know that? We don't know everything that went on between films so how can we assume she never told him. Mind you, in D3 Audrey knew the truth seeing as she used it to taunt Mal meaning that it is a known fact. Unless Audrey somehow secretly found out that information and was using it against Mal (which I HIGHLY doubt) then that must mean that her true intentions behind spelling Ben are known to the general public.

Some people even go to the lengths of accusing Mal of taking advantage of Ben which is insane because as we saw, she refused to even kiss him while he was spelled when she had multiple opportunities.

These are only some of my many opinions on the many things people like to say about her. Maybe I'll do a part 2 if I'm up for it we'll see lol.

#descendants #mal descendants #mal is the love of my life and i will defend her till the day i die #mal bertha

[laniemae]

SIDE ORDER HYPE THEORIES PART 1

An extremely incoherent dump of side order theories and thoughts!

Now uhh side order wild right apparently it’s tomorrow???? I completely misjudged I thought it was this weekend. But ok I don’t even know how to start it so I’m just gonna go wild.

Now let’s address the elephant in the room: is side order a virtual world?

So there is lots of imagery to imply this. A huge number in side order’s aesthetic is digital and glitching aesthetics. The first instance of this sort of imagery appearing was in the first trailer for side order, where in one of the static images shown Marina had some glitching effects. Now that we have more context on the situation (not really? Just a truckload of more digital motifs) I still don’t know what to think about it lmao. The background may look like it’s in the square but I’m not sure. And currently we’ve only seen Pearl drone and 8 there. But even so it looks like concept art so I don’t know how much we can infer from that.

In the second trailer things becoming more apparent. In the scene where the jeletrons (I think that’s what they’re called?) appear there are some glitching blank spaces, like the reality is glitching apart. 

And I was just thinking, what if side order isn’t a virtual world but had kinda fake virtual elements??? I don’t exactly know how to explain it but think of something like security breach ruin. Everytime 8 goes into a level a bunch of yellow code reveals the surroundings. Side order is a rougelike and I think it’s said that every level would be unique so perhaps there’s an in universe explanation for that. Perhaps some sort of tech that “loads” the level through code and constructs the surroundings based on that, without necessarily being in a virtual world. 

Interestingly enough even outside of the sprite there appears to be some rouge code, surrounding the spire specifically. And when you first wake up in the game the entire place loads in like the levels, implying it’s some sort of construct. But inkoplolis square and deca tower exist in the real world so what’s up with this? Putting that into consideration it wouldn’t make sense why whoever wants to enforce order would create an entire virtual world as that would be redundant. Perhaps going into the theory that lots of the stuff we see is a digital construct perhaps they remodelled the square using this.

But this brings up the question, how would they have this technology and have we seen anything like this before? The closest thing I can think of is octarian technology, but they don’t exactly have this level of stuff here otherwise octarian society wouldn’t be as ruined as it is if they could create stuff from thin air with code. There is some stuff that could come somewhat close to this with the floating error screens in Alterna but it’s nowhere near this level. But there is something notable that comes to mind. In Octo expansion, when you splat any of the sanitised octarians they glitch out instead of explode, and all have distorted voices that sound like they’ve been compressed through some software. This could very much be some aesthetic choice but this strange real-world glitching motif isn’t seen anywhere else in the game, but everywhere in side order. But despite this, the enemies you splat in side order don’t have the same glitch effect, so what’s up with that?

Again this could be some design choice and not actually important but aside this Acht/Dedf1sh’s appearance in this definitely hints to some connection to Octo expansion. Acht was the composer for the songs that play throughout Octo expansion and appears to have done something for octoplush in Alterna as well, implying at some point they might’ve found their way in the area. Acht is a sanitised Octoling who still has some sort of free will/consciousness left and thus can interact with 8 and Pearl like this. This aspect of them is probably how they managed to escape the deepsea metro facility in the first place, perhaps following some time after agent 8 managed to escape from there.

The deepsea metro is directly connected to inkopolis with a pathway leading to it underground. This is perhaps how Acht ended up here in the first place, and got caught up in whatever’s going on, perhaps putting a dent in the virtual world theory.

But that also brings up the question, was Acht in the splatlands? As they seem to have composed a song for octoplush and have their signature on the signature board in splatsville. They probably wouldn’t have to have traveled much due to the train that was built from inkadia to the splatlands but this implies they escaped before whatever happened to inkopolis square happened.

So in conclusion to this part of my ramble I think that side order may perhaps not be a virtual world, but there’s some sort of technology that can use code or whatever to materialise locations and objects. Perhaps using some sort of biological mechanism with microorganisms? Yes I bought this up out of nowhere lmao. There’s also one thing I wanna bring up but don’t know where to put it is that it seems the first thing that’s gonna happen with side order is seeing neo 3 asleep on a train, and having the screen glitch out and transition to inkopolis.

The infinite cycle of order

So the most recent trailer for side order focuses a lot on a cycle. A cycle of advancing through floors, using colour chips and completing objectives. This and the whole thing of the game being an infinitely replayable thing makes sense because it’s a rougelike, but I want to discuss the story implications here.

Already the motif of infinity and cycles is hugely present. Just about everywhere you can find the infinity symbol. It’s present everywhere in levels, on the technology, the 8 ball which is now an infinity ball, the currency, the palette, basically it’s as prevalent as the Alterna and Kamabo co logo, which makes me think it could play a role like those. Alterna was a long lost human civilisation and didn’t exactly have a driving force in the story in its own, rather on how it was used by others.

Kamabo is interesting though. As it was the company Tartar set up to run the test facilities in the deepsea metro while convincing its subjects that if they pass the tests they’ll enter the promised land, but actually just killing them. Lots of the facilities used the original metro to get around and was entirely under the control of the kamabo corporation. So basically, it was a major antagonist force.

So what does this mean for the infinity thing in side order? When I first saw it I suspected it was something like Kamabo, an evil company controlled by the main antagonist that sets up facilitates, but it’s definitely different than that. The infinity thing seems to have control over the weird code and glitching thing that I mentioned earlier might be manifesting objects in the world though technology. But once again how did this facility get hands on tech so advanced we have never seen before? The octarians didn’t even have stuff on this level and all the crazy tech stuff we have seen are still in the realm of stemming from octarian/human tech but this is completely new.

It’s hard to think about how they got this but since this is side order and perhaps this has something to do with order losing to chaos in the splatfest, it could be some sort of counter measure to the more chaotic inkling society has become, and trying to make everything some perfect semi virtual world, but this is a little off track.

Going back to the theory of the role of the infinity thing in the story, one thing that really sticks out to me is off the hooks involvement in it. From the beginning it seems that the infinity thing is some sort of antagonistic force, the one behind this nightmare of order. But looking at the back of the Pearl drone it has exactly the same logo as we see everywhere. And it doesn’t just stop there. The special cans that resemble marina’s hyper bombs have the same logo, and the pop up screen that shows in the trailer when she’s hacking into the system to give agent 8 more lives.

So what’s going on here? Why are off the hook associated with this infinity thing which is likely the one causing this? There’s a lot of ways this could go. Perhaps they’re not affiliated with it specifically and are using technology that was from the code or whatever I was going on about with that theory. This approach could mean that at some time perhaps the Pearl drone could get hijacked and someone pretending to be Pearl could misguide you. There’s also perhaps that off the hook is somewhat actually working for the villains (assuming the infinity thing is villainous). I don’t know why they’d side with it especially that what they’re doing goes entirely against their whole attitude towards the final fest but this is interesting to think about. Perhaps instead of willingly joining they were coerced into bringing 8 into this mess? As 8 seemed to wake up with no idea how they got there. 

So that’s kinda the whole deal with what its involvement in the story could be but I wanna go back to my point of infinity/cycle symbolism. As I said the trailers make a big deal out of repeating a cycle to ascend the spire of order. Perhaps this cycle could be symbolic of something and by perpetuating this agent 8 could be doing more harm than good, getting stuck in a vicious cycle of order or whatever’s going on. The philosophical implications for this are really interesting. And this could’ve been already bought up before as the creatures that reside in the square that we see are describes to be “like cogs in a machine to create a far more complex cycle of social order.” So perhaps they’re stuck in some stagnant cycle as well, unable to escape from this world that was built for them. And maybe agent 8 is getting manipulated into this same cycle by ascending the tower, and perhaps the only way we move forward is to break the cycle. I’ve always found breaking out of stagnation and cycles and stuff to be an incredibly interesting storyline so I’m really exited for this.

Some other things I want to point out that is that in the very first trailer we see multiple Octolings standing on some sort of thing. It’s concept art so I don’t know if it’s outdated or whatever and I kinda forgot why I even bought this up in the first place but perhaps it could be of some sort of relation, although that’s just vibes for me.

So basically I think a whole cycle of infinity and 

repetition is going to become important from all the infinity motifs we’ve seen so far and the gambler focus of a cycle. And wondering what this infinity thing is and if it plays an antagonistic force in the story and why off the hook are involved.

gonna make a part 2 to this soon post was getting too long

#Splatoon #splatoon 3 #side order #splatoon theory #You can clearly tell I did not plan this at all #Just vomit everything in my brain onto here #No cohesion or whatever just a bunch of random side tracking

[burningthegallows]

ok so I accidentally deleted that one lltg history post I wrote. I genuinely can’t be assed to recreate it because screenshots and evidence and …

anyway. one of the first things that grabbed my attention in lltg were the beautiful sets and costumes — they’re all so well put together. right down to shanjian’s feathered fan.

that led me to a question: western han (202 BCE - 9 CE) or eastern Han (25-220 CE)??

what I found was that lltg uses a mix of both to make it too ambiguous to place. it’s a fun way to do a period piece I think, cause all the history nerds get to go on scavenger hunts, you can play with historical paragons, and there are so many tropes.

Despite one story being lifted pretty much directly from the eastern Han (emperor guangwu, his 1st and 2nd empresses, and his heaps of children), most of it seems to be more western Han.

{as an aside, it bums me out that they took all these details from these three real people, and the one thing they changed was ex-empress’s end. In history she and her son just go on about their lives as consort and prince, and then they’re given a new province to rule over.}

the imperial city in the show is luoyang (true to eastern han; in han 1.0 western han, it was in xi’an), but I think it’s a bit more thrown together than that. And in fact, I think wendi is actually the Emperor Wen of Han.

And I think that because of the 1) emphasis on thriftiness, 2) the fact that Wen of Han was the one to end the policy of wholesale clan slaughter for particularly egregious crimes (does actually make css kneeling in the rain hit different) and 3) other reasons.

The most interesting of which i think is the 7-states rebellion, a rebellion shut down by Zhou Yafu (paragon of military virtue, known for his integrity), who’s father, Zhou Bo, is a Huo Chong-esque archetype.

(In my original post I had an argument about the xiongnu too, but I can’t remember it now. probably something about the length of the war)

The struggle that takes place 15 years before the series could be the pseudo-coup of Dowager Lü (Empress Gao of Han), or it could be the chu-han contention (ending with first han emperor). Honestly though, then beginning of the eastern han does make sense here. wendi tells 3rd princess (I think) that the dynasty is barely ten years old.

(The period between western and eastern han is short and dominated by warlords)

So the world is more familiar to the western han (2nd-1st century BCE) but it def a hodge-podge — which makes it into a fun (for history nerds) scavenger hunt. Spot the trope: history edition!

#I’m still irritated by empress’s death fullstop #love like the galaxy #history ramblings #what did she die of anyway #if she’s depressed put her in the sun #or get her a puppy

[foggyparadisecandy]

True Foggy Facts ahead - hold on. It's a real tear-jerker

People have doubted me my entire life. No lie.

Possibly because of my honestly awful parents (I forgive but really ... so much trauma), I have always been filled with self-doubt and self-loathing.

But ironically?

I also have had a deep desire to smash people's faces in when they underestimate me. lol

I like to keep busy to keep my mind from going to dark places. For what it's worth, I think this is common with people with Anxious Preoccupied attachment styles.

This overwhelming anxiety that drives you to lose yourself one way or another. Some will turn to alcohol and drugs (please don't abandon yourself in this way ... please) ... some will turn to hypnosis to blank out ... some will bury themselves in a hobby or work.

I can go from zero to fully obsessed with hobbies, work, and people in no time whatsoever (hi K! lol).

If I go in on something, I'm going all in.

When I was in middle school, I was already out of control. I was a C-level student mainly because I couldn't keep focused. I found school to be boring and a waste of time. I wanted to engage with other people. I didn't want to "learn." lol

I would routinely get report cards "Foggy is a disruption to the entire class. He should learn to focus on his work and not disrupting others." "Foggy should be held back to work on social skills." etc. etc. haha

What the fuck ever, dudes. I was looking for attention and love that I wasn't getting at home. My parents would just look at those comments and say "oh well, what ever in the world could *we* do to change this kid?" ha. ha.

I was pretty sure I was a loser.

I started high school as a C student my first half of the year until a teacher pulled me aside. I'll never forget it.

"Foggy, I'm curious about you."

"Really?" (lol - no one had ever been curious about me or what I was up to hahaha - I was taken off guard)

"I can tell you are extremely smart. You could be in Honor Society with a little work."

"What's Honor Society?" (she hooked me - no lie - and like a needy fish, I was going for it)

"It's for students with the best Grade Point Averages. I think you could get there with a little work."

"What's a Grade Point Average?" (I literally had no clue - she looked at me in disbelief)

"Your parents have never talked to you about your grades?"

"No ... I don't think they care." (true! they didn't give a crap about me - boy was that an awkward thing to admit out loud and the look on her face was slightly alarmed so ... yeah ... I was embarrassed to be seen like that)

"Oh. Well if you get an A, you get points, if you get a B, you get points. And if you get enough points, you can be in Honor Society and get a special award and recognition."

"Huh. That sounds interesting." (I love me some competitions)

"I'm available to talk more if you would like. I think you should apply yourself. I think you have a good chance."

"Ok. I'll think about it." (I lied - I had already decided that I was going all in on this)

Well, dear reader, I did apply myself. I went from a piss poor student to top of my class over the next four years.

All because a teacher - who I didn't even have as my teacher - she was just evaluating students and somehow stumbled across me! - stopped me and took a minute to give a shit.

The moral of this story is:

We never know what we are capable of doing when we put our minds to it. We never know our own blindspots even. Having a good network of new, fresh ideas and perspectives is key to having a fuller life.

Build your network with diverse voices,

Read more stuff - live outside your perspective,

Surround yourself with good influences who lift you up

The second moral is:

Be kind to others. You have no idea what the impact will be on their lives.

I had nothing as a kid. No stable love, no support, no care, no guidance, no safety, no stability, no anything of any value.

But that teacher took a few moments to patiently tell me "I see you. I see your potential." and it changed my world.

Is it any wonder I do the same with others?

I know how it can impact others to feel seen. To feel appreciated. To feel loved.

I see you <- it's all here if you want it (Please ... want it)

#love #self care #self love #self improvement