#ok i am so tired and my only motivation to sleep instead of stare at my phone is to have enough energy to continue the next chapter of
tfw you finish reading an angsty 10k fic at 1:30am and you’re left hanging but you get a notification that the author actually just posted a second chapter and it’s another 10 fucking thousand words 😳😳🥴🥴🥺🥺🥺🥵🥵🥵🙌🙌🙌🙌
9 notes · View notes
𝐴𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑧: 𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑆/𝑂'𝑠 '𝐶𝑎𝑛'𝑡 𝑆𝑡𝑜𝑝 𝐾𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑌𝑜𝑢' 𝐶ℎ𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑒𝑛𝑔𝑒
Hongjoong was busy scribbling away on his notebook that he didn't even notice that you had set up a camera to face him in the studio. Giving a thumbs up to the screen, you tiptoed over to where he sat. Crouching down, you wrapped your arms around him and kissed his cheek. He didn't really react so you leaned in and kissed his nose, this time a small smile formed on his lips.
"Ok. Ok. Come here." He pushed his chair backwards and placed you on his lap, his arms wrapping around your waist.
He thought you just wanted to sit on his lap while he worked, but instead he got you placing kisses all over his face, which made it impossible for him to concentrate, especially when your lips were so soft and warm.
"Baby." He whined as you smushed your lips onto his.
"Hmmm?" You hummed as you continued to kiss him.
"I'm trying to finish.." He told you but still made no effort to move you, instead he just lazily kissed you back.
You chuckled against his lips.
"Ok then..." You pulled back slowly and stood up to get off him.
"Wait! No! Come back!"
In an instant, Hongjoong made you straddle his lap again, his hands cupping the sides of your face as he began kissing you again. He just couldn't stop after you made him crave some smooches.
All throughout the day, you had been pecking Seonghwa's lips whenever you got the chance. He didn't notice anything off about it, you were always affectionate with each other and he himself tended to be kissing you randomly.
He started to suspect something was up though when you were helping him with his sit ups. Every time he came up, you purposefully kissed him, making him lose count or get distracted. He just giggled though and thought you were being playful or to motivate him in his workouts.
So when you two were cuddling, he started to do the same to you: he began randomly kissing you, making you a blushing mess.
"Seonghwa!" You squeaked when he began kissing down your neck.
"What? You've been like this all day, but when I do it, you get shy?" He shook his head.
That's when you bursted out laughing and began explaining to him what was going on. He became embarrassed and began laughing.
"Here I thought I made you fall in love with me more and that's why you were so lovey dovey." He confessed awkwardly.
You smile and leaned in to kiss him again.
"There's no way I could possibly fall more in love with you than what I already am."
Yunho was already excited at the thought of getting to spend time with you after endless promotions. He had missed you so much and craved your affection that he obviously didn't find it weird that you were peppering him with kisses when you met up.
"Oh my god. Baby did you miss me that much?" He teased you even though he had missed you a lot as well.
You two went out and did all sorts of things: go to an arcade, take a walk in the park, got lunch somewhere and eventually went back to your place to watch some movies. All throughout this, Yunho had not really noticed that you were kissing him more than usual.
Sensing that he wasn't really reacting, you decided to try something. Throughout the entire movie, you began kissing different parts of his face almost every 15 seconds. At first Yunho just smiled and would mutter something about you being cute.
Then suddenly, after you kissed his neck for 4 times in a row, he stopped and looked at you with a serious look.
"I hope you're willing to take responsibility for your actions."
He shocked you when he tackled you onto the couch, trapping you in his arms as he aggressively kissed your cheeks and neck. You writhed your body as you tried to get out, but Yunho wasn't having it.
"You can't just keep kissing me and showering me with affection and not expect me to retaliate Y/N! This is war!" He chuckled as he kept attacking you with kisses.
You truly weren't sure how to go about this. Yeosang wasn't particularly fond of PDA and wouldn't often initiate affection. Still, you wanted to see how he would react....if he even reacted at all.
You started off by linking hands with him as you walked by the streets, he didn't seem to mind, even putting your hands inside his coat pocket to keep them warm. Going in for the kill, you pecked his cheek. He stopped in his tracks for a split second but then continued on as if nothing happened, only noticeable difference was the blush on his cheeks and ears. You tried doing that several more times and succeeded in 4 of them, but the rest Yeosang ended up avoiding.
You honestly felt disappointed. Sure Yeosang was shy, but you never thought he'd reject your affection so coldly. So you decided to give up and just sat there quietly next to him on the bed as he read one of his many novels, his hand squeezing yours every now and then. Feeling a little brave and wanting to try it one last time, you leaned in and placed 3 kisses to his temple. Yeosang paused before closing his book. After he set it down, he turned to look at you, sighing as he stared deep in your eyes. You were about to apologize but then he surprised you by pulling you into a soft and romantic kiss.
He only pulled back to whisper against your lips:
"You have no idea how long I've been holding back." before proceeding to kiss you again.
You already pictured how the challenge might end up, you knew your boyfriend so well. As expected, every time you placed a kiss on any part of his face, he'd return the favor. And the more kisses you were giving him, the more he clung onto you.
Soon, it was he who was placing more and more kisses on you that you almost forgot you were supposed to be the one doing the kissing.
"Seriously baby? What has gotten into you?" San asked you rather amused when you crawled into his lap and intensified the amount of kisses you were giving him.
"Don't." Kiss. "Know." Kiss. "Want." Kiss. "Kissies." You responded with kisses in between your words.
San chuckled at how cute you were.
"Well....seems to me like someone is being needy."
He flipped your positions so he was now hovering above you, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.
"Do you want some help?"
Attaching his lips to your neck, San began nibbling on all your sensitive spots, making you get flustered as you tried to push him off.
"San! Wait! It was only a challenge!" You exclaimed, letting out a tiny moan when he bit down on a particular spot.
"You think that's gonna stop me?" He smirked at you.
"Baby? What do you think of this one?"
Mingi only got a kiss in response to his question. He blushed slightly and put the red sweater back.
"That's the 4th time you've done that." He pointed out.
"Done what?" You feigned ignorance.
"Kissed me out of nowhere." He explained.
You merely mumbled something and went back to looking through the clothes on the rack. Mingi was confused though, not knowing what was going on. Were you trying to tell him something? Were you mad at him? Did he do something wrong? Was this payback? He was so lost.
He just decided to see what else you'd do and indeed, you kept pecking his lips at random times that left him baffled and somehow wanting more. Now whenever you started leaning in, he'd cup your chin and kiss you back. He began thinking that maybe he'd been neglecting you and you wanted extra love. So when you guys got back home, the first thing he did was pick you up and carry you to the bedroom as he kissed you all over your face.
"Ok we're home now. So let me love you and adore you like the little baby you are." He cooed at you as he tangled his legs and arms all around your body.
You were frustrated. At first, everything was going fine. Wooyoung became shook every time you planted a kiss on his lips at random times, sometimes blushing. But now? He was evading your kisses.
"Oh look! Mail's here!" He exclaimed as he walked away from you before you could even lean into his face.
It seemed like he was doing it on purpose. So you tried something.
"Woo? Can you get this thing down for me?" You pointed to one of the cabinets in the kitchen.
Sighing, Wooyoung abandoned his task of washing fruits to go help you out.
"Shorty." He snorted as he got down the box of pretzels for you.
You grinned at him. "Thank you my handsome and tall boy-"
You were cut off because he placed the box in front of your face when you tried to yet again kiss him. He began laughing at your frowning face.
"You're so mean! All I want is to kiss you!" You huffed.
"Oh really? You sure it's not for your vlog?" He raised an eyebrow at you.
You widened your eyes at him, wondering how he knew when he continued.
"You're not very discreet baby. And besides, I'm always the one initiating kisses. That was the first clue something was up."
You had to give it to him: he is smarter than what you gave him credit for.
You decided to start early, knowing it'd be a lot cuter to catch his reaction if he was still half asleep. You cuddled up next to his sleeping body, sifts snores coming out of his nose. You brushed your nose against his cheek before pressing a soft kiss on his skin. He didn't move.
Pouting, you moved him slightly, making him groan softly. Hovering on top of him, you began pecking his lips repeatedly. At first, Jongho only twitched the corners of his lips and then he started giggling softly.
"5 more minutes baby cakes. And then I'll play with you." He whined softly.
You started humming, making it seem like you'd let him have his 5 minutes, but one minute passed and you began kissing his lips again. Jongho groaned, repeating that he was tired. You began to kiss his shoulders and when he shuffled his body, you ended up kissing his neck, more specifically, right on his mole, where he was particularly sensitive in.
Jongho's eyes shut wide open, startling you and further scaring you when he flipped you in the blink of an eye and pinned you down on the bed.
"Ok. My turn."
He was definitely awake now.
Gifs not mine. Credit goes to their respective owners
835 notes · View notes
Quick note your headcannons and writing are amazing! Could you do a headcanon on how the brothers would handle an anxiety attack, maybe one that causes shaking and an upset stomach?
When my anxiety is bad, that’s how my attacks display themselves as-well ! I just look rlly pale and feel like I’m gonna be sick, and just physically am unstable, almost like I can’t use my body , it’s kinda hard to describe .
Each brother has a little bit of a different situation, hope that’s ok! may or may not have went overboard... whoops! let me know if you want one where mc doesn’t want touch and is vocal about it.
I’m at work on break rn so the last three boys are kinda rushed, I can ways for back and lengthen them later!
Requests are open!!
TW: Mentions of anxiety attacks
Brothers with an MC having an anxiety attack
(An Mc That’s ok with touch)
You can’t even quite remember what triggered it. You woke up, ate, went to RAD, and now you’re walking to your next class . It started off as a creeping pain in the ribs and upper chest. As nothing was off beforehand you thought it would pass. You thought wrong. You felt your face heat up remarkably, and had the undisputed feeling of a sinking coal in your abdomen/diaphragm. ￼You wouldn’t let yourself go though . Not here. You walked yourself to the bathroom as fast as you could , and locked yourself in a stall. Focussing on deep breath’s proved ineffective, so you went through your bag in hopes of gum , a snack, water , something that could distract you. The fact that you had nothing only pushed you further into your spiral, and your arms were shaky and heavy as stone. Leaving for the stall and opting for the sink, you try to splash some water on your face to bring you out of it. While doing such, your DD continuously went off, as the brothers were now aware of your absence in class. You couldn’t explain. You didn’t have it in you to articulate the situation. After sending simple “I’m going back to HOL” and shut your phone off completely. Any noise or stimulation only proved to further aggravate your anxiety attack. Once returning , you went straight to your room and shut the lights off, and curled up in bed facing the door. You refused to close your eyes, you needed to see, it was the only thing distracting you now. All you could do is sit, and hope it would pass.
most likely the one who is initially annoyed by your lack of attendance, however he was in the middle of a meeting with Diavolo, so he couldn’t just leave to drag you back to class
afterward he returned home to question your motives, making a beeline to your room
with a cold knock- he’s a gentleman, he’d never barge in, right?- he awaited your response
he knew you were in there, did you really return home just to nap?
opening the door, we was met by a dark room, and you, curled up on your bed
he initially thought you had fallen asleep, but his assumptions were snuffed out the minute you made eye contact with him
you just kept looking at him, you didn’t have it in you to respond
you looked like a live wire to him- colour had long left your face, eyes reflecting a perturbed space
you were clinging onto your comforter as if it was your lifeline
he had a hunch of what might be going on, but wasn’t sure
“can I touch you?”
you didn’t say anything, so he wouldn’t take that as a yes, but you didn’t protest as he scooped you up bridal style
his hand cradled your back as he made his way to his room
he tucked you into his bed and put on the fireplace
he wasn’t sure if touching you in this state was a good idea, so he gave you space, reading through some of his paperwork at the coffee table on the other side of the room
as you slowly came down from that state, you felt how exhausted your body was from being in a prolonged fight or flight state
you were getting kind of drowsy, but heard some shuffling at the end of the bed
looking over, lucifer gave you a soft smile-quite rare-and simply said
“get some rest, you must be tired. I’ll wake you up for dinner.”
you didn’t even register the gentle kiss on your forehead as you slipped into a peaceful sleep
It had been a couple days since that incident, and the brothers have noticed a bit of a softer spot between lucifer and you
you hadn’t brought up what happened, and he wouldn’t pry if you wished not to talk about it
however, he has made a point of checking in with you, and monitoring your stress levels throughout each week. on the days you look especially overwhelmed, he does your chores for you, and lets you rest in his room and study while he works
prideful and a secret tsundere, lucifer texted you the night after your anxiety attack
“Come to me next time you feel like that.”
and that was all. Nothing more, nothing less
it was this unspoken communication. You’d go to him, and nothing ever needed to be said, your face said it all.
you were grateful for the privacy he gave you
though he’d never tell you, on some of the nights where he is stressed, he pokes his head into your room while doing his rounds, and relaxes at the sight of your peaceful sleeping form
he had wanted you to come with him to his photoshoots after class, why’d ya hafta run off from him?
another one to go straight home, worried you might be sick, or worse- injured.
one of two boys who doesn’t knock, just barges straight it
“Oi Mc! where’d ya-”
he feels like he’s going to be sick
no, correction, he might shit himself
what the actual fuck
you’re lying in bed with a look of absolute unease, in the dark with your eyes wide open at him
you don’t even move or respond
what should he do? he’s panicking, straight up
he looks you over, looking for any sign of physical injury, he’s an anxious wreck
that’s what’s going on.
he’s felt this way many times before, but how does help you through it?
the fact that you’re in pain right now is hurting him so much.
he doesn’t even say anything, he scoops you up and silently walks to his room
he keeps the lights off, so it’s a miracle he didn’t trip on anything and drop you
tucks you into his bed and holds onto you
you tensed up, so he went to let go of you, but as you did you felt your unease start to rise, so you held onto him like he was your lifeline;
and he was ok with that. you didn’t sleep, he didn’t speak, he just held on tight to you as you stared at the wall
as the hours passed, he felt you slowly start to relax in his arms, and that filled him with relief
didn’t know what to say, but wanted to help
“...wanna talk about it?”
and so you did
he just held you and ran his thumbs in little circles on your shoulder
you were his human, and he was gonna make sure everything was ok
he’s a bit more overprotective now, and sometimes in the middle of things will stop and turn to you, and with a serious face ask
“you ok right now?”
a little confused but he’s got the spirit!
he just wants to hold you
on the nights you two sleep together, he waits for your to fall asleep first, and watches you while stroking your hair
he prefers this peaceful, somber bliss on you
This otaku shut in was sitting in the kitchen eating a snack between online classes, and poked his head into the main hall to see who had just come home at such a random hour
as he realized it was you, he called your name to greet you, but did not expect your reaction
you had straightened up, and slowly turned around to make eye contact with him
what the actual fuck??? was he in a horror movie? the way you looked at him was almost, pleading. your body language however was that of cornered prey
I hc he deals with some sort of anxiety, which means he’d be pretty good at detecting others in anxious states
as he realized what was going on, he slowly walked towards you in a non threatening way, and guided you to his room by the hand
you had looked like you were going to collapse, so as he sat you down beside him in his room, he wrapped his tail snuggly around you like a hug, which was something he learned can act as a decompresser in relaxing anyone in a heightened state of adrenaline
went to put on video games, but realized the chaotic noise may not be very helpful. instead he opted for a peaceful slice of life anime
he placed an open water bottle near you and a snack in case you wanted it, but you just stared at the screen
as the episodes went on, you relaxed into his tail, so he loosened it a bit
when he realized you had fallen asleep, this man was blushing like no other
you were peacefully sleeping, cuddled up to HIM in His tail like a blanket
Man he’s so awkward he’d struggle to talk to you about it the day after , so he sends you a text message
Whenever you feel like that you will either text him or go to him
The days you can’t make it to him, he will come to you and bring you to his room, and swaddle you in his tail like a sleeping bag
This man is blushing everytime this happens, but it genuinely seems to help, so who is he to stop doing it
Maybe if you’re lucky he’ll work up the courage to cuddle up to you afterwards, drawing little shapes on your back with his hand as you lie with him in his bedtub
He was the one to initially notice you weren’t in class- you had ancient literature together, and tardiness / absence wasn’t your thing
The text to him spoke volumes, as out of anyone he is aware of language and its use
As much as he didn’t want to leave a class about reading, he had a nagging impulse to check on you
And so he did
As rapping at the door gave no response from you , he slipped inside and gently shut the door behind him
Unable to respond , and you could do was look at him. Speaking was too much right now
He walked over and seemed to be lost in thought
As gracefully as he entered, he left - only saying a brief “I’ll be right back”
he returned with a book in hand
Scooting you over , he positioned you so that you were curled up against his lap while he read his book
With one hand he held his book, the other holding onto you and playing with your hair
As you started to settle into his arms , he read part of his book out loud- something for you to focus on
He guided you upright and brought you to the kitchen
Sitting you at the counter, he prepared hot drinks and a snack
You two sat by the fireplace and discussed what today was about, exploring any possible triggers or factors
As you grew more comfortable he was able to ask questions about what it’s like, what he can do and more about any conditions you may have
He’s gentle , but has a tactical approach to the situation overall
Ensures that you have a safe area whenever you start to feel overwhelmed
Love when you snuggle up to him on the couch in his room
Might not tell you that though... who knows
He was in your potions class that morning , you weren’t looking unwell - had something changed? Had someone upset you?
He needed to go back to HOL anyways to pick something up, so he thought he could poke his head in
Though he knocked on the door, he opened it right after (seriously what’s the point of knocking then??)
After seeing your form lying down , he came over and cooed at you
“Mc honey you look awful!”
At your lack of response , he grew genuinely worried , though he’d rather not focus on those emotions
Was stumped on what to do so he sat by your head and brushed your hair, humming now and again to pass the time
You hadn’t realized you had dozed off until you had woken up again, only to find asmo looking at you with a smile on his face
“Feeling better now, are we?”
You offered him a small smile in return
Though he wanted you to have a relaxing activity filled night, you weren’t up for much
You ended up eating dinner in his room with him, and you two did your make, nails and a skincare routine
He sat and talked about talking care of yourself
Beauty comes from within, and the first step to that is taking care of your mind
He tries his best, but it’s a little frightening to him, as he tends to avoid his emotions quite a bit
You guys could work on that together though
And that’s all that matters
He now consistently has self care sessions with you , and you both use that time to decompress
It’s nice honestly
You were supposed to meet him for lunch after second class, and now he’s sad :(
He decides to go home for lunch, so he can check up on you
He knocks twice and waits each time , but after waiting he gets worried, and cracks open the door just a bit
“Mc? Are you ok?”
Upon seeing the apparent distress on your face , he’s panicked, ngl
He picks you up like a baby and looks you over
You were just so overwhelmed, and so much was going on. All you could do was huddle into his chest and cry
He wrapped his arms around you gentle and swayed slightly for some movement , with small words of affirmation to you
“It’s ok, you’re ok, you’re safe”
He’s seen this with belphie , so after realizing you weren’t injured , he was relieved . however after you started to cry his heart broke into tiny little pieces
How did he not notice you were so anxious today??
As you started to calm down he wiped the tears from your face and looked you over
“let’s go get you something to drink, you’ll get a headache from crying”
He carried you downstairs as you had yourself wrapped around his frame for comfort
Handing you a water bottle , he eyed you carefully as you took small sips
You always felt safe with him, he radiating comfort and warmth
When he offered his ears, you two talked about how you’ve been feeling
You guys missed the rest of class, but that’s ok
He now constantly pulls you aside to ensure you’re taking the time to calm down and focus
You, him and belphie take naps together during the especially demanding weeks
He ensures you eat the right foods, so that you minds can function properly
He’s just worried you, and wants you to be happy and safe
He was napping in the main hall when you came home and heard you run to your room
Followed you upstairs, and wasn’t sure what to do, he can be emotionally constipated sometimes
He lay beside you and held you close, pulling you into a deep sleep to help you calm down
You awoke a few hours later to him looking at you, with an unreadable expression on his face
Was he concerned ?
“ let’s talk about it”
Didn’t even give you an option , which you are secretly thankful for
You sat and talked for a couple hours, belphie opening up a little bit , and vice versa
You two stayed in bed , fussing with each other’s hair and having mundane conversations
You two now had a better appreciation for what the other goes through daily
Whenever you look stressed , belphie pulls you aside and rests with you for a little bit to recharge
The attic now becomes your safe space , in which you two retreat when things become too much
Who would’ve thought he had such a soft spot for you in the end?
Hope you guys enjoy! I will edit and expand the shorter sections when I get off of work!
383 notes · View notes
I am obsessed with twelve minutes sooo, why not make an imagine about it 🧍♀️
Also this is the first time I have ever used tumblr, and my grammar is very poor. I will try and get used to the way tumblr works and hopefully if I have any motivation I will start writing more :) My writing skills are bad so this is going to be choppy
Another note : The roles are reversed, so instead of the reader being the husband, its going the be the wife figuring everything.
clench ya butt cheeks
No..no, no, no, this can’t be it
As I took a step into my apartment I heard my husband in the bathroom humming a soft tune. 10 minutes. The pills. The cop. The pocket watch.
“Hey, I didn’t hear you come in”
I looked up to see h/n (Husbands name) walking towards me with a smile and pulling me in to a passionate kiss.
“I made desert, let me know if your in the mood” He stated while making his way on to the couch.
I give a quick nod signaling that I would tell him when I was ready. Quickly glancing around my home I made my way to the sink and filled up a mug of water, the floorboards creaking in a specific spot as I ambled to the bathroom. I opened the medicine cabinet grabbing ahold of the sleeping pills and pouring them into the mug, and going back into the living room to see h/n reading a book.
"I think its a good time for desert” I suggested
“Ok, babe” h/n replied with a sweet smile
He noticed the cup in my hand and turned around to the fridge and got the desert out. I placed the drugged mug by where h/n was sitting and got my own mug instead.
“So how was work?”
“It was alright, met a couple of new people, Its going great” I said as I saw h/n drinking his water
“How about you? How was your day?”
“Same old day I guess it just repeats itself” he said as his eyes started drooping down into a sleepy matter
Tch.. talk about repeating
“Im feeling so tired all of a sudden, Im gonna go lay down”
“Okay baby, goodnight”
As soon as I saw h/n close the bedroom door I scampered to the closet and closed the door behind me aware that the cop will be here in a few minutes
Now we wait…
“Police!, open up I have a warrant”
My breathe hitched as I heard him turn the doorknob and stepped into the house
“Hello?, anyone home?”
“Police” the cop shouted when he opened the door
“Police, I have a warrant”
He made his final call making his way into the bedroom,hearing the light switch turn on a scream came from the man as he layed unconscious on the floor. After hearing nothing but silence I crept out the door into the room, searching for the valuables from the cops uniform
The gun, 2 handcuffs, the knife, and the phone
As I did last time,Rolling him over, gripping both of his wrists and tieing them together, I remembered there was a little box with my mothers name on it.
A/N : I did change the baby clothes to a necklace, kind of like a bday gift
My hand trembled to the gift lying on the table next to the flowers, I held it and stuffed the box into my front pocket. I took my time staring at the man in awe and confusion
He’s already told me why he’s here, he told me he was a good friend of my husband’s father. He’s hiding something.
“Augh- what- you little shit”
The cop was stirring awake from the electrocution but only figuring it all together that he was handcuffed. He glared at my shoes as some kind of threat and saying words, pleading to be let go, I reached into my pocket pulling out the box and showing the man the name on the necklace
“Do you recognise this name?”
“Dahlia? Yeah I knew her so what?”
“Do you know anything about her?”
“Yeah, she was the mother of your husbands sister”
Mother of my husband’s sister? But that was my mothers name
“Just let me go you prick”
“I promise im innocent I dont have anything to do with this”
“Okay maybe if you let me go, I wont kill you” the cop stated in a cold and tone
I took the knife out of my pocket and handed him his things, he asked…
“Im here for a pocket watch very valuable… do you have it?”
“Yeah, I’ll go get it now”
Thoughts were running in my head as I went to go to the bathroom to get the strange watch
Mother of my husbands sister? Dahlia, thats my mothers name… no it can’t be.
I grasped the pocket watch in my hand, watching is slowly turn clock-wise
“Have you found it yet? I dont have all day!”
My hand gave out to him, as he took the pocket watch
“Im gonna need a few minutes with your husband, go sit on the couch, but if you do anything stupid, I’ll kill you..” he demanded
He’s gonna kill him, I know, so lets just let it happen.
A bead of sweat drip down my forehead as I smelled the scent of blood coming from the other room
Mothers name of husbands sister, husband said he got a necklace with my mothers name on it, Dahlia. So if dahlia is my mother h/n is my… brother. My own brother is my husband. Fuck no please, I have to get out
Sprinted across the room to the door and made my way out just to end up in the same place as always.
“No.. fuck no no no no- this can’t be happening please”
My husband came out of the bathroom again with a panic and worry on his face and started to bombard me with questions.
“Baby are you ok?”
“What happened honey?”
I’ve had enough
“S-STOP IT, GO AWAY”
“Baby whats wrong” he pleaded with concern
“NO! Please I have to go” I shouted at him as I bolted through the door coming back to the same gentle humming tune coming from the bathroom.
“Hey, I didnt hear you come in”
Again met with the same eyes with my lover ugh- brother, I cant tell him, I cant.
“Hey babe” I said as he kissed me once again,
this is wrong
“I made dessert, let me know if your in the mood”
The same sentence every ten minutes.
Snatching the pocket watch from the ventilation grid, the grunting and groaning leaving my mouth as I tried to get up from the pain in my back,
The watch was broken. Turning the long handle I fixed it back to its place, 2 minutes before 12. I saw the world turn into a dark abyss, the watch turning anti clock- wise, my hand slowly fading into the tiles of the bathroom, my eyes growing heavy and started to close putting me into a deep sleep
“Hey there he is… your back”
“Look, I know this is a… terrible shock. But we need to be on the same page. Look, I… These feelings for my son… your brother. This isn’t how I wanted to tell you…you deserve… both of you deserve better.”
He said with a long pause
“Yknow the thing I hate the most, worst thing in the world?… Disappointing my lil boy. Well that was the worst thing…. And now a baby… you with your little… love… I guess it was always gonna happen”
He said as he walked around in disbelief and ignorance
“Nothing stays swallowed down forever. So, you gonna make a call”
“If i could go back..” I started
“Well. Things would be different. But you can’t just try again. Thats not how life works! So, you gotta make the choice, and make it now”
H/n’s book about zen..
“Fine!, your gonna force it by hand? Fine!”
“Hey “its only by forgetting that.. we ever really drop the thread of time, and approach the experience of living in the present moment””
“Ah, you’ve read that one, eh?”
“I know the idea of forgetting things sounds crazy but, what if… you could?
I can help with that if you want. All you have is the future, you’ll forget everything you went through. All the pain. All the stress. Forgotten forever. But, you need to understand there is no turning back. You can’t undo this… we can still talk about him but you need to choose an answer…”
I stared at the clock as I watch it about to turn twelve
“you don’t have to forget if you don’t want to, The choice is yours”
“ you do have a remarkable imagination… The stories you’ve created… but believing them so strongly, so deeply is unhealthy… you have to let him go… you can’t keep obsessing over him… sometimes things are just as what they are…
Its time for you to wake up…
12 notes · View notes
So this is based on El @robertssvgden post wondering how Robron would react to their daughter getting pregnant from a one night stand with a shitty guy. Like Gabby’s story on ED right now.
I ended it where I did because it was starting to get LONG and if I had to include granddaddies Robron it would have easily gotten at least twice as long... so depending on motivation and inspiration (and interest!) I’ll add that as a part two in the next few days.
Also thanks to this I’ve been singing Papa Don’t Preach all weekend and it took Great Restraint, not to use that as fic title.
(And @ anon the vet Robert fic is still in the works too, I promise!)
“I said, are you going to be home for tea tonight?” Aaron asked, yanking one of Seb’s earbuds out of his ear.
“Hey! I was listening to that!”
“And I asked you a question.”
The two of them stared at each other for a moment before Aaron sighed and repeated his question.
“I don’t know… are you cooking or is dad?”
“Alright then I definitely have a thing with Isaac tonight.”
“Cheeky.” Aaron messed up his son’s carefully styled hair. “I’m a good cook. Your dad never complains.”
“That’s because he’s married to you. He has to say that. It’s his duty as your husband.” Seb said with a grin.
“You’re my son, doesn’t mean anything? What about your duties?”
“Nope. Only on father’s day and your birthday. And every other Christmas.”
“Only every other Christmas?”
“Yeah the other is for dad.”
Aaron laughed and shook his head.
“When did you become such a smart arse?”
“You say smart arse, I say witty and devastatingly handsome.”
“You are so much like your dad, it’s unsettling sometimes.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“You do that.” Aaron laughed. “By the way, have you heard from your sister? Is she going to be home for tea?”
“I don’t know. Do I look like her secretary?”
“I reckon you’d look great in one of those pencil skirts and high heels.” Robert said as he walked into the house, catching the last part of the conversation. “Hi.” He greeted Aaron with a kiss.
“Dad, that’s sexist.”
“What? How is it sexist to say my son would look good in a skirt? You’ve got killer legs, mate. If you’ve got it, flaunt it.” Robert teased and laughed when Seb rolled his eyes and closed his laptop.
“I’m just going to not be here for a few hours, so I can work in peace and you two can just be…” he waved his hand in the general direction of his parents. “Just be… you…” he gathered his things and shrugged on his jacket.
“Let us know if you’re stopping at Isaac’s tonight.” Aaron called out as Seb walked out the door and gave his father a half wave in return to let him know he heard him.
“Careful, dads think they’re funny again… and dad’s cooking. Aaron.” They heard Seb tell someone.
“I don’t care.” Came the reply.
“Alright. It’s your funeral.”
Seb left and at the same moment Robert and Aaron saw their daughter Ruby walk in.
“Hey Rubes, how was the film last night?” Aaron greeted her.
“It was fine…”
“Fine? You’ve been looking forward to seeing it for ages. I thought you’d be more excited.” He shared a look with Robert.
“Did you and Steph fall out?”
Ruby shook her head.
“No we’re fine. Everything is fine. The film was good. Really good.” She gave them a forced smile. “I’m just going to go have a shower and maybe take a nap. I’m tired.”
“Did you stay up all night talking about boys?” Aaron teased.
“Something like that…” Ruby replied instead of the usual protest and sputtering and reddening cheeks.
“Just take it easy for a bit. We’ll wake you up when tea’s ready.” Robert promised her.
“I’m not hungry.”
“Well maybe you will be later. Your dad hasn’t even started cooking yet so it’ll be a couple of hours.”
“Are you feeling alright?”
“Yeah, yeah, of course. Just tired.” She said and disappeared up the stairs to her bedroom.
Robert turned to Aaron with a worried look on his face when he heard the door close.
“That was weird.”
“Yeah… but that’s teenagers for you.” Aaron reasoned.
“Should we call Steph’s parents? To ask if they noticed anything?”
“Rob she’ll never talk to you again if you do that. She’ll come to us if something’s bothering her.”
“Yeah… I suppose you’re right…”
“Of course I’m right, I’m always right.” Aaron joked and pressed a quick kiss to his husband’s lips.
A few hours later, Aaron dished up their food and Robert made his way upstairs to wake Ruby up.
“Rubes? Are you awake?” He knocked on the closed door but got no answer. “Ruby? Tea’s ready.” He knocked again. “Ruby?”
“I’m not hungry.” Came the muffled reply.
“Just come down anyway and eat something. Your dad put a lot of effort into it.”
“I didn’t ask him to!” Ruby yelled through the closed door.
“Ruby, are you alright?”
“Yes, I’m fine! Just leave me alone!”
Robert’s hand hovered over the doorknob, aching to turn it to open the door and check on his little girl. He shook his head and decided against it.
“Alright… well… just come down if you change your mind about tea. There’s plenty.” He said and went back downstairs when he got no reply after a minute.
“Where’s Ruby?” Aaron asked when he only saw Robert walking into the kitchen.
“She’s not hungry and wants to be left alone…” he sighed and Aaron frowned.
“Is she ill?”
“I don’t know. She won’t open the door. Maybe she’s fallen out with Steph after all. Or one of her other mates.”
“Yeah… maybe…” Aaron agreed and they sat down to eat, not speaking much, both worried about their daughter.
After tea Robert helped Aaron clean up the kitchen and load the dishwasher and then settled on the sofa to watch some tv. Though neither of them were really watching.
“Do you think she’s alright up there?” Aaron asked after a while. “Should one of us go up to check?”
“Maybe… but how much can we do through a closed door?”
Just as Aaron was about to get up to go check on their little girl, she came downstairs and shuffled over to the armchair.
“Hey you, feeling better?”
“Do you want something to eat? There’s plenty left.”
Ruby shook her head.
“I’m not hungry.” She told them. “Seb just texted me, he’s not coming home tonight. He’s off out with Isaac.”
“Why is he texting you and not one of us?”
“I don’t know… because he’s an idiot.”
“He takes after his father.” Robert teased and Aaron rolled his eyes and kissed him.
“You’re a nightmare.”
“You two are so weird sometimes.” Ruby commented.
“You’re 19, you should be used to that by now.” Aaron grinned. “Just you wait until you find that special person of your own. You will have your own weird stuff.”
Ruby bit her lip and was suddenly very interested in the tv.
“What are you watching? Anything good?” her voice was trembling.
Robert paused the tv and both of them sat up and turned their full attention to their daughter.
“Ruby, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Everything is fine. I told you.”
“Yeah and it’s obviously not true.”
“You can tell us.” Aaron pushed. “No matter what’s wrong, you can always come talk to us.”
“Not about this.” Ruby said quietly, forcing back the tears.
“Tell us and we’ll be the judge of that.”
“No. I can’t… I just can’t…” Ruby insisted. “You’ll be angry and disappointed and I can’t handle you looking at me like that.” She blinked and tears started running down her face.
“Hey, don’t cry.” Aaron got up and knelt down in front of her, taking her hands in his, trying to get her to look at him while Robert sat down on the chair’s armrest and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Tell us what’s wrong.”
“I promise we won’t get angry.” Robert added.
“You can’t promise that.”
“Yes we can, and we are. Will you please tell us what’s wrong so we can help you? I hate seeing you so upset.”
“You can’t help me. No-one can.”
“Of course we can.” Aaron insisted. “We’re your parents, it’s kind of our thing.”
Ruby shook her head and wiped her eyes with her sleeve.
“You can’t help me…” She said again and took a deep breath. “I… I was late. Am… late.” She started, looking at a spot on the wall above Aaron’s head.
“Late? Late for what?”
“Late… late. I’m never late… so… I bought a test this morning and I took it at Steph’s… and it was positive. And then I did another one at home earlier… and another one… and they were all positive.” Ruby sobbed.
“Wait… what are you saying here?”
“I’m pregnant dad! I’m having a baby!”
“YOU WHAT?!” Robert exploded. “How did that happen?!”
“I think we can fill in the blanks on how, Robert.” Aaron snapped and turned his attention back to Ruby. “Are… are you sure?”
“I took three tests, dad… they were all positive.”
“Right.” Aaron ran a hand over his face and sat down on the coffee table. “I uh… didn’t know you were seeing anyone…”
“I’m not… it was a one time thing… At Sienna’s birthday party a few weeks ago. We met there and liked each other and it just… happened.”
“Seriously Ruby? A one night stand with a boy at a party? A boy you don’t even know?” Robert started pacing. “And you don’t even use protection?! We taught you better than that! We taught you about condoms and your aunt Vic even went to the doctor’s with you to get the pill! And you don’t even take them?”
“I do take them!” Ruby protested.
“So how did this happen then?!”
“I don’t know! I had a few drinks… I think I threw up… I don’t really remember…”
“He didn’t force you, did he?” Aaron cut in.
“What? No. We both wanted to.”
“Ok. Good. That’s all I needed to hear.”
“Speak for yourself. I can’t believe you were this reckless Ruby! Getting drunk and jumping into bed with the first guy that’s nice to you…” he shook his head in disbelief.
“It wasn’t like that!” Ruby yelled and got up. “And isn’t that exactly what happened 9 months before Seb was born?! You getting drunk and sleeping with his mum?!” she ran up the stairs and slammed her bedroom door shut.
“Ruby! Get back down here!” Robert yelled and looked at Aaron for support but was met with a glare. “What?”
Over the next few days, the atmosphere in the house was tense to say the least. With Robert and Ruby constantly at each other’s throats and Aaron trying to keep them from killing each other.
Robert had apologised for his initial outburst but still the smallest thing would set either of them off.
The latest war was over the fact that Ruby wouldn’t tell them who the boy was that got her pregnant.
“It doesn’t matter who he is, dad!”
“If it doesn’t matter, you can just tell us.”
“No. You don’t know him anyway.”
“Does he even know you’re pregnant?”
“No. And it’s staying that way. It was a one off. We’re not together.” Ruby insisted. “And it’s my body and my choice.”
“Don’t you think you should tell him?” Aaron tried. “If it was me, I’d want to know.”
“Yeah, well, it’s not you. If I have an abortion, he’ll never have to know.”
“Is that what you want? An abortion?”
“I… I don’t know yet.”
“You’re going to have to make a decision on that soon though, Rubes. It’s kind of time sensitive.” Seb cut in.
“I’m just saying, if you don’t make a decision soon, mother nature will do it for you.”
Ruby glared at her brother.
“Mother nature? Really? What are you? Fifty?”
“He’s got a point though…” Aaron tried. “And if you decide to keep the baby, the boy has a right to know he’s about to be a father.”
“I don’t know if I’m keeping it!”
“I know. That’s why I said if.”
“I’m so sick of all these men telling me what to do and thinking they know what’s best for me! It’s my body, my baby, and my decision! None of you get a say!”
She grabbed her coat and bag and stormed out of the house.
“Ruby!” Aaron called out but the only answer he got was the door slamming shut.
“I’ll go after her.” Seb offered. “She hates the both of you right now… I’m not on her shit list. Yet.”
“Call us when you find her.” Robert stressed. “I need to know she’s alright.”
Seb grabbed his jacket.
“Dad she ran out the door less than 2 minutes ago. She won’t have gone far.”
“Just humour me ok?”
“Fine.” Seb sighed and left the house, looking for his sister.
He found her on the swings in the village playground, trying very hard to show anyone how upset she was.
He walked over to her and sat down on the swing next to her.
“You plan on drinking that?” he nodded at the bottle of whiskey in her hand.
She shrugged and picked at the label.
“No reason why I shouldn’t. I bought it yesterday. With my own money.”
“You’re not going to talk me out of it?”
“Why should I? You’ve obviously made up your mind already so…” he shrugged. “The least you could do is share though. Nothing good comes from drinking whiskey alone.”
“Like you.” Ruby said, grinning at her brother. Ever since they’d accidentally found out about how Seb was conceived it had been a running joke between the two of them.
“I’m one of a kind.” Seb said, taking the bottle from his sister and taking a swig after opening it.
“That’s one way to put it.” Ruby teased.
“So, are you going to tell me who knocked you up?” Seb asked, ignoring the jab.
“Did dads send you to find out?”
“Nope. I just want to know who got my sister pregnant so I can get him a black eye.”
Ruby rolled her eyes.
“You couldn’t win a fight against a puppy.”
“Who would want to fight a puppy?!” Seb joked and bumped his shoulder against his sister’s. “Come on, just tell me.”
“You don’t know him. He’s… older.”
“How much older? He’s not married is he? Or someone’s dad or something?”
“NO! He’s 24.” Ruby sighed. “A mate of Sienna’s brother… he was nice… and I liked him… and well… I wanted it. Him.” She admitted, looking at her shoes.
“Yeah? Well… we’ve all been there.”
Ruby gave him a confused look.
“Your last birthday. Me and Oliver.”
“You hooked up with Oli?! My friend Oli?! Since when are you even into blokes?”
“Your last birthday.” Seb grinned. “Don’t tell dads but we’re kind of together. I don’t want them embarrassing me. Not just yet.”
“Does Isaac know?”
“Of course. Who do you think covers for me when I’m with Oli?”
“Right. I can’t believe my brother is hooking up with one of my best friends.”
“Better believe it.” Seb shrugged and took another swig from the bottle. “So now you know my secret, want to tell me yours?”
“It’s Scott Fletcher.”
“Don’t say it like that! He’s nice!”
“Does he know?”
“Yeah… I told him yesterday…”
“I guess it didn’t go so well then… if you went and bought this bottle.”
Ruby shook her head and took her phone out of her bag.
“He used me to make his girlfriend jealous… and I guess it worked. They’re back together.”
Seb read the texts on her phone and felt his anger rising.
“He’s got NO right to treat you like this! I’m going to kill him!”
“No! I just want to forget about it all.”
“I don’t care. I’m going to have a little chat with him.” Seb said and got up.
“No, don’t. I don’t want you getting hurt over my mistakes.” Ruby pleaded.
“It’s as much his mistake as it is yours. And I’m going to remind him of that.” Seb announced. “Just go home, dads are worried about you.”
“And where are you going?”
“To see a man about a baby.”
“No. If anyone’s giving him a black eye, it’s me. I don’t need you defending my honour.”
“Well then, what are you waiting for?” Seb said, offering his sister his arm. “Let’s go have a chat with Scotty.”
“Hello?! Seb?” Aaron answered the phone after practically sitting on top of it all afternoon.
“Where the hell are you? Is Ruby with you? We’ve been worried sick!”
“Yeah… uhm… the good news is, I know who the father of Ruby’s baby is.” Seb started.
“That’s not really the news we were waiting for.”
“Yeah well… it’s uhm… complicated… but uhm… we uh… kind of… got arrested. We’re at the police station.”
“We went to see the guy… just to talk… and then he started calling Ruby all kinds of nasty things and well… things kind of… escalated.”
“I uh… just let him know I didn’t appreciate him calling Ruby a desperate slapper.”
Aaron pinched the bridge of his nose.
“Are they charging you with anything?”
“Not really… but we could use a lift home.”
“We’re on our way.”
After making sure both of their kids were in one piece and PC Swirling assured them they were free to go, the four of them got into the car and drove back to Emmerdale.”
“Can we get some chips on the way?” Ruby asked.
They were halfway there and she hadn’t said anything since they’d left the station.
“I… want to talk to you…”
Aaron glanced at her in the rear-view mirror and then at Robert who nodded.
They decided to stop at a pub in Connelton.
“So…” Robert started after the whole family was pretending to be too interested in their food to talk. “What did you want to talk to us about?”
Ruby bit her lip.
“That guy Seb hit… he’s the father.”
“We kind of figured that out, yes.”
“He wants me to get rid of it.”
“And is that what you want too?”
“I… I… I’m not sure…”
“Well whatever you decide, we’ll support you.” Robert vowed.
“Even if I don’t go through with it?”
“Of course. Why wouldn’t we?”
“Well… I know how hard it was for you to have me and…”
“That has nothing to do with this.” Aaron insisted. “If you want to have an abortion, we’ll support you. We’ll book the appointment, we’ll go with you to hold your hand if you want. We’ll all be there for you.”
“And if you want to keep the baby, that’s fine too. We’ll be there for you every step of the way.” Robert added and Aaron nodded.
“Absolutely. So just think about what you want. If you want a lift to the clinic or the baby store.” He told her and took a minute to study his daughter’s face. “You’ve made up your mind haven’t you?”
“Yeah… yeah I think I have…” Ruby said, looking at her parents and brother. “I… I think I want to keep the baby. I know I do. I… I think I’ll be a good mum.”
“You’ll make a great mum.” Robert got up to hug her. “This baby will be lucky to have you.”
“And you and dad.”
“If it’s a boy, you could name him after his cool uncle.” Seb suggested with a grin. “Sebastian junior.”
“Oh come on Seb, the kid isn’t even born yet and you want to torture him already?” Aaron joked.
“And it might be a girl.” Ruby added.
“Sebastienne then. Or Sebastiana? It sounds fancy and all.”
“Maybe I’ll name him Oliver if it’s a boy. Just like your boyfriend.”
31 notes · View notes
I'm curious, what will OT3 Fluffynightkiller/Ccillermare do if one of them gets sick or gets injured? Will they try to take care of their partner, or are there other options?🤔
Have a nice day! (^^)
That's a good one! And hell if I'm gonna miss this opportunity for some fluff....... And so Angst, some sweet angst.
But fluff first.
Also I should probably tag my fellow head cannon makers now that I've thought of it @yuriyuruandyuraart and @kotikaleo
So first Nightmare and Killer.
If Nightmare is sick then he tries to act very grown up about it. He doesn't need anyone's help to take care of him, he's a grown up. He'll text Killer to let him know he's not going into work, saying he's sick.
Killer "awww you want me to come over and put you to bed with a bottle of milk Nighty?"
Nightmare "oh shut it you"
So Nightmare tells Killer he'll be fine by himself and not to worry. That won't stop Killer from texting him every 10 minutes or calling him every hour to check on his boyfriend. Just in case.
Killer on the other hand is stubborn as a mule about being sick. He's abit like Monica from friends in this aspect. He'll come into work with a bitter cold, coughing and sneezing, but will deny being ill in anyway. (no corna in the studio verse thank god)
Que him attempting to act but getting not even 5 minutes into the script before the director tells him to go home. Nightmare trys to convince him resting would be a good idea.
Nightmare "come on now ya idiot.... Let's go you're sick"
Killer "nope! *sneezes* how about you an I go to your dressing room sofa.... And I'll show ya I'm not sick~"
Nightmare "...... No"
Killer "aw.. Don't you want some of this?"
In the end Killer goes home and spends the time sleeping, complaining that he's not sick or texting Nightmare, trying to get him to come over for fun times. You know to prove he's fine. Nightmare has never fallen for killer's subduction methods. At least that's what he says.
Though for the most part Killer and Nightmare take care of themselves when they are ill. They are both Independent people who don't want to attmit to needing help, or attmit to caring enough about the other one to offer help. Yall know 'casual'
This is wear Ccino comes in, he's the opposite to his partners in that aspect.
When one of his boyfriends as ill he'll be over with some warm tea in a flask, some painkillers or cough syrup and some tins of soup. No matter what Nightmare or Killer say, he is stubborn with this.
Nightmare "ccino it's just a cold, I can take care of myself"
Ccino "nope. I made you soup!"
Killer "I'm not sick honey, I can prov-
Ccino - no shush!, drink your tea"
Nightmare and Killer go into a slightly tsundere mode about it. They don't like being cared for by the coffee boy! They aren't blushing! Shush!
As for Ccino being sick? Well.... For that I have two answers.
First one being that If Ccino was unwell, it wouldn't stop him from working. Kind of like Killer, but for him, he's not in denial about being sick, he knows he's sick but he will work anyway. Even if he stays home, he's not in bed. He's up studying or cleaning. Always working.
Luckily after he gains two boyfriends, you can be sure that Nightmare and Killer are gonna pay him back for caring for them by bringing over soup and tea.
However this leads me on to my second answer. This might press into a touchy subjects so be aware of that.
Ccino is basically sick all the time because he makes himself that way. This is where the Angst comes in. Under the cut.
He'll be up at 3 am studying, only to then get up at 6am to feed his cats. Then he'll go to work at a local coffee shop for a few hours, then study for an hour or so, then go to work at the studio. Then he comes home, eats, showers and gets to classes. Then after classes he'll keep studying. And repeat.
After Nightmare and Killer were brought into the picture, Ccino has to squeeze them into his schedule. Now he has to make up the time with Nightmare and Killer by studying or working longer.
Long story short, Ccino never gives himself a break. He just has to much work to do, but he'll never attmit this to anyone.
And it just gets worse. Sometimes Ccino forgets to even take care of his basic needs. His cats and his lovers are more important. Maybe he'll forget to eat every other day, or forget to shower. He's fine though. He's fine.
Imagen one day while working at the studio it all just hits him at once and it drives him to collapsing. "I'm fine... Im fine" he says as his boyfriends question him. He gets to his feet, saying he needs to get back to work.
But maybe then they notice, those dark circles under his eyes.... When did he last sleep? The stains on his clothes, when did he last shower? When was the last time they saw him eat?
Nightmare and Killer start to notice things about their coffee boy. The way his smiles are often forced or very tired. They way that his shoulders are sagged. The way his arms are covered in 'cat scratches'.
Sometimes Ccino just won't show up for work. He'll just lay in bed and stare upwards. His phone will ring and he'll want to answer but.... He just can't. He doesn't have the energy. Nightmare or Killer will come and knock on his door. But he can't get up and answer. He just doesn't have the motivation or energy.
Ccino still has depression. As happy as Nightmare and Killer make him.... It doesn't change that. His depression might be a mildler form. But it's still there.
Then after a few days he'll come into work like nothing happened. Maybe Nightmare and Killer didn't notice this when he first started working there. But after a while they start to notice. All these little things make them worried.
So maybe instead of teasing him, they will just give him more genuine affection. Hugs, kisses, nuzzles.
Maybe they offer to help him to study and help him revise.
Perhaps they bring him food during his shifts, or cook for him or take him out for dinner. So that he eats.
Maybe they start sleeping over at his flat more or inviting him to theres. So they can hold him at night and make him feel confortable. Or they can make sure he sleeps.
In the end perhaps they catch him while 'the cats are scratching his arms' or maybe they happen to be there when he doesn't have any energy. They just want to help him with soft kisses and touches. Lots of words of reassurance. Maybe convince him to finally let down his walls.
"it's ok to tell us if you are hurting, it's ok if you aren't ok, you aren't a burden to us... we love you remember that".
So in the end Ccino is the one who needs to be cared for the most out of the 3 of them. We can only hope that Nightmare and Killer can give him that love.
Heh.... This got abit sad, but if I'm honest, this is my truest, head cannon about the relationship. I'm sorry to get into touchy topics, but it's something I have personal experience with, which makes me want to share it more. I'm not sure how many of you read this part, but thank you for reading.
53 notes · View notes
Don’t Forget #4
Pairing: Taeyong x Reader (slight Kun x reader)(johnny x oc)(mark x oc)
Theme: Soulmate au!, reincarnation au!, college au!
Genre: angst, fluff, comedy, smut
Summary One Two Three Four
Warnings: Foul language, manipulation, choking, bit of dirty talk, degrading, mentions of an absuive relationship, bullying, protected penetration(wrap it up before you tap it), fingering.
word count: 3.6k
A/N (PLEASE READ) Hi hello lovelies, I am back with chapter 4, Ok first of all I am so sorry for taking so long to post, I’ve just had no motivation to do anything since lockdown started but i’ll try to write more so please forgive me. second of all i’m thnking of doing 2 more chapters atleast. Also I was not expecting there to be smut in this chapter but here we are lol. enjoy.
Taglist: @shiberrysan @soleilchannie @nctsfatboi @alicelovesapple @bluesky820 @sadteenat18 @ericafujimura @soleilchannie
Days went by since your last interaction with Taeyong and in all honesty, it left you feeling lonely. As crazy as it sounds, you missed him. The stranger that you had literally met not even a month ago and had kissed behind your own boyfriend’s back had left a hole a hole in your heart just from not speaking to him. It’s not like you didn’t want to forget the situation because you did, you wanted to forget everything so badly and just live a normal college life, but you couldn’t for the life of you. It was adamant that Taeyong was officially engraved in your mind and there was no way to escape that. The distancing part was hard, but your friends didn’t make it any better. It really really help that both your mutual friends were practically fucking in front of you. So of course being the person you were, you of course joined in because you couldn’t be angry at Heather and Tala, they hardly even knew what was going on and to be fair you didn’t know either.
It was just another day at school, sitting in a history lecture and your mind was else-where. Your chin was sar upon your palm, using it to lean and stare out of the large window on the side of the room. The sound of your lecturer was just background music to you, not taking in anything she was saying.
“In April of 1920, the main family to run the town moved in. The general’s family included his wife and daughter, however in 2001 when the families house was discovered by historians and a picture was found in some files left behind after Korea’s revolt” A picture was shown on the large screen and showed a family of three but the father’s hand was cut off at the edge.
“As you can see, the General’s hand has been cut off, so the historians looked more into the photo and found that it had been tampered with and the full photo was found. A speculation went around that the extra girl in the photo had been the general’s eldest daughter who had been shunned out of the family”. A sudden gasp filled the room when the teacher had revealed the missing half of the photo of the older girl, probably in her late teens. “Oh my God, she looks just like you Y/n” Tala suddenly whispered beside you, causing your head to finally move towards the screen. Your heart stopped the minute your eyes met the ones on the screen. It was like looking in the mirror. The girl had your looks to a T, other than than the hairstyle and the clothes, you could pass it off as a photograph of yourself. A tight feeling hit your chest almost like someone was squeezing your heart. The emotion in her eyes showed one of pain and the feeling washed all over you as if you felt everything she had been through. At this point other members of the class started looking between the photo.
“Ah, I see you’ve also noticed the resemblance between Miss L/N and the general’s daughter. Don’t look so worried Y/n, freak things like this happen all the time. You might not even have any relations to the family at all” Your teacher laughed it off, but it didn’t make the feeling in your chest disappear. Your classmate began to settle down after your teacher had spoke all agreeing it was just a freaky coincidence. You on the other hand couldn’t let the weird feeling in your chest go.
“Anyway, the theory of the the daughter being kicked out of the family went even deeper in 2002 when archaeologists found human remains buried in what was confirmed to be the execution centre. Two bodies were laid together. One of an 18 year-old Korean male and the other a young girl of 17 with a match to the General’s DNA”At this your hand moved on it’s own accord catching the teacher’s attention.
“But what reason would they have for killing one of their own”You asked catching the attention of the others but ignoring it, the question haunting you, needing an answer. “Ah, well you see those of the Y/Race and the Koreans were not to indulge in any relationship otherwise those of the Y/R would be seen as traitors”. Once she finished her sentence a weird chill ran down your spine as if you had just been reminded of a terrible memory.
Your class was dismissed but for some reason you couldn’t bring yourself to get up from your seat. Tala and Mark watching you with concerned looks. “Y/n, I know it was pretty freaky, but I don’t think it’s that deep” Mark said as he laid his chin on Tala’s shoulder watching you as his girlfriend reached out to you. “Y/n he’s right c’mon it;s nit like you’re actually related or anything” Tala said, her hand reaching your shoulder, snapping you out of whatever state you were stuck in. You looked up to the pair and gave a faint smile before packing your things silently in a rush, leaving your two friends two friends standing there confused.
You hurriedly walked through corridors, not wanting to contact anyone you knew. The feeling of seeing a ghost still made you shiver and you just needed some alone time from everyone. You weren’t really looking where you were going until you felt a body stop you. “Y/n, babe are you okay” You looked up to see your boyfriend looking down at you as you released a breathe you had no idea you were holding. You nodded with furrowed brows not really understanding the pain you felt. “Good because we need to talk” He said grabbing your wrist and pulling you to the nearby benches.
You sat with your hands in your lap, eyes looking at your twiddling thumbs not really in the mood to ‘talk’. “Have you been ignoring me” Kun suddenly asked and it made you look up at him. “What? no of course not, I just have been going through a lot lately” You said the end of your sentence disappearing with the wind.
“Really but cause there’s a rumour going round that you’ve been sleeping with Taeyong” Kun said his voice suddenly raising. Your heart dropped at the name but you ignored it when you were being accused of cheating. You looked at your so called boyfriend with wide eyes as you opened your mouth to speak but closed it as the kiss flashed past your eyes. “So it’s true, wow”Kun laughed, the bitterness evident in his voice. “What the fuck no, I haven’t slept with anyone Kun you know I’m a virgin”You fought back angry at the fact you were being accused of sleeping around.
“What makes you think I would even believe that” Kun scoffed which just sent irritation through you. “You know what Kun, Fuck you, you don’t need to believe me cause I know i haven’t done anything wrong” You snapped, getting up and grabbing your things. You began walking away but didn’t get far when you felt him grab your wrist.
“Who are you talking to Y/n” Kun asked rhetorically an annoyed smirk planted on his face, at this you rolled your eyes at him tired of his narcissistic personality. “Kun, I’m tired of your bullshit, please just let me go”You sighed trying to pull your wrist out of his grip but it only tightened when you tried to pull away. “Y/n are you breaking up with me?”Kun asked his eyes squinting at you. This time it was your turn to scoff at him as you looked into his eyes. “Yes, I’m breaking up with you” You finally said which only caused his grip to tighten at this point hurting you.
“I don’t know who you think you are Y/n L/n”Kun said as he began pulling you closer but it was clear to everyone that you were reluctant to close the gap between you two. “Kun get off me”You shouted at him as you were pulling yourself away but of course he wasn’t listening instead he carried on with the verbal abuse. “You can’t break up with me Y/n, look at you what would you do without me hugh? Who else would go for you, Taeyong? cause he probably only slept with you cause you were easy”He spat causing a shake through your body as you looked at him with wide eyes not wanting to believe the words that were coming out of the man you thought you loved mouth. “You only got your social status in high school because of me! otherwise you would’ve been left the nerdy bitch in the corner” He carried on, your mouth opened to defend yourself but he cut you off before you could. “Do you know what everyone used to say about you hugh? do you?”He pressed as you felt tears fill your eyes and he began listing disgusting names and phrases targeted towards you.
You didn’t even realise how long you two were standing there until you felt someone push Kun off of you. “Dude what the fuck”Taeyong suddenly said as he noticed the red mark that was forming on your wrist. “Oh so he fights your battles for you now too does he”Kun laughed as he tried getting to you but was stopped by by the male in front of you. “Of course I’m going to fight for her cause you shouldn’t be hurting girls man”Taeyong clapped back as he pushed Kun back. He turned to you with a worried expression and put his arm around your shoulder as he lead you towards his dorm building. You turned your head to look at the Kun who was watching you walk away with Taeyong and running his hands through his hair with frustration. Biting your lip you turned away and felt hot tears run down your cheeks.
You hadn’t even thought about the situation you were in when Taeyong sat you down on his bed, leaving your side to go close the door. You quickly felt him kneel in front of you, his hand reaching up to wipe the tears that stained your face. “Hey, hey Y/n look at me”He said bringing his hand to cup your cheek and lift your face to look at him greeting you with a small comforting smile. “I heard some of the things he said to you”He began and that immediately made your drop your eyes from him again. “None of them were true okay, don’t ever believe anything he said”He carried on as he brought your sight back to him, adoration just randomly set in his eyes. You chcukled slightly at the lost puppy look he gave and nodded slowly while sniffing. There was a silent pause between you both as you just stared into each other. “Wait Taeyong, how did you find us”You asked breaking the silence forgetting the fact you did go to the same school and he probably was just walking past.
“I told you, I’d always find you”He whispered slightly but loud enough for you to hear. You smiled but furrowed your brows at him and giggled a little. “Taeyong no you didn’t” You said. “What yes i did, you know when we were in the forest and you told me not to forget you remember” He asked as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Taeyong, there are no forests near the campus”You said again moving your hand to move his own off of your face. At this something flashed through Taeyong’s face and looked just as confused as you were. “I think it was probably a dream or something God”He laughed as he moved to sit next to you on the bed. The silence filled the room again as you both sat side by side. You let his words echo through your head, them suddenly holding a weird meaning behind them as your felt your eyes water all over again. “Y/n are you okay”He asked as he noticed the tear that dropped onto your jeans. You looked up at him and watched as he looked at you with so much concern it made you want to choke. You rlunged forward and pressed your lips against his, catching him off guard but after a few seconds you felt him melt into the kiss. His hand reaching up to stroke your cheek. The kiss lasted for a few minutes until you pulled away catching your breath. Taeyong stared at you, his cheeks a dusty rose as his eyes became hooded as he watched you. The look he gave you made you feel so naturally loved and understood that it drove your actions. You reached down to the hem of your shirt lifting it over your head without a second thought, leaving you in your bra in front of the so called stranger you had been avoiding. “Y/n, what are you doing-“ “Taeyong please, I need this”You breathed pulling him into another kiss which he didn’t pull away from. His hands moving to grasp at your bare waist pulling you closer. You stood up and pulled off your jeans leaving you almost bare in front of him before going to sit in his lap. This was your first time but there was no fear, no second thoughts, you wanted this, you wanted him. Taeyong moved to remove his own shirt before pulling you back in for a kiss. Your hand went to rest over Taeyong’s chest feeling the way his heart beat under your palm sending shocks down your spine at how fast it was going making you feel wanted. Your hips began moving on their own accord like it was second nature to you, grinding down on Taeyong causing him to groan into you, the vibrations from it tickling your lips. You opened your mouth unconsciously to breathe but Taeyong used it as an advantage to push his tongue into your mouth, tangling with your own. The feeling made your legs try and press together but were stopped by Taeyong’s thighs in-between you. His hands moved from your hips down to your panty covered ass, Using it to guide you onto the growing bulge in his pants freely letting the groans and moans slip from his throat. The sounds he made just fuelled you and increased the wetness in-between your legs further. You pulled away and quickly moved down to your knees but Taeyong immediately stopped you. “No baby not yet”He breathed bringing you back up before switching positions with you so you were on the bed. He pushed you down so you were lying down on his sheets while he removed his pants and came to tower over you. “Do you want this” “Yes Taeyong please”You sighed as you felt his hand stroke the inside of your thigh. He moved to the hem of your underwear pulling them down slowly in case you were to object but instead you helped him remove them. You felt odd being so exposed but there was no discomfort anywhere. You sat up slightly to remove your bra before lying back down as Taeyong’s eyes scanned your body. “You’re so fucking beautiful you know that”Taeying breathed as he dipped down kiss at your collarbone which had you smiling like a little girl. You hadn’t even noticed that his fingers prodding at your entrance until one finger slid into you making you gasp at the feeling. “You’re so wet baby”Taeyong whispered against your skin as he slowly thrusted his middle finger into you, curling it every so often which had you moaning suddenly at the new feeling. He added his index finger making you wince slightly at the stretch but got over it went when he began speeding up slowly. Your cheeks heated at the sounds that were being made just by the small action but ignored it due to the pleasure that you were feeling.
A tight a feeling began residing in your lower abdomen and you felt tears prick at the corner of your eyes. “Taeyong, I’m cumming fuck”You whispered as you felt his palm press down on your protruding clit. The feeling of him palming down on your sensitive nub as he curled his fingers inside of you had you seeing white dots around you as you let out a silent scream as your orgasm washed over you, Taeyong’s fingers slowly moving inside of you as he pulled himself up and away from you to watch your face contort in pleasure as your thighs shook slightly. Your hand went down to grab his wrist to stop him before looking at him with a flushed expression. “Taeyong, fuck me”You said as you stared into his eyes. You swear he gulped before pulling away from you to pull a condom from his drawer.He pulled off of his last piece of clothing before ripping off the foil and rolling down the latex on his cock. You watched as he settled himself in-between your thighs and reached down your hands before grabbing the throbbing body part. You watched it in your hand as you felt it pulse slightly, hot and heavy against your palms. You gave it an experimental pump which had Taeyong arching over you, breathing heavily into your ear as you repeated the action. “Baby stop”He said suddenly as he felt a shiver run up his spine at the sight of your hands wrapped around him. You pulled away, scared you had hurt him but dismissed that when you saw his cheeks flushed and lip stuck between his teeth. You reached up and kissed him as he adjusted himself to press against your opening. Moving the head up and down your slit as you gasped into the kiss. Taeyong pulled away and pressed his forehead against yours. “Tell me if it hurts okay” He told you before pushing into you slowly. The pain wasn’t as bad but the stretch was uncomfortable. Taeyong groaned when he finally fit all of him inside you, trying to ignore the way your walls clenched and unclenched around him trying to get used to him. You sat there for a while before the dull ache subsided. “Move please”You said as you moved your arms to wrap around his neck pulling him closer to you. Taeyong smiled and moved his hips slightly, gripping the sheets as he ignored the urge to pound into you. The grazing against your walls had your eyes closing as you relinquished in the feelings, allowing your body to be overcome in the new found pleasure. Taeyong’s hips accidentally bucked which made you yelp. “Oh my God, i’m sorr-“”Do it again, harder”You quickly said wanting to feel whatever that was again. Taeyong looked into your eyes and didn’t find any hesitation before moving his hips against yours harder, faster. The movements had you moaning out loud, probably notifying everyone in the building what was going on in Taeyong’s shared dorm. The sound of skin slapping had your cheeks burning but you couldn’t stop it even if you wanted, your back arching when Taeyong’s head hit a spot inside of you that had you seeing stars.
“Say my name”Taeyong moaned as he watched your eyes roll to the back of your head. You weren’t able to even think when Taeyong began slamming his hips against yours but was brought back when you felt his slim fingers wrap against the skin of your neck. “I said say my name baby”Taeyong growled as he tightened his grip on your pulse slightly causing a shake out of you, your orgasm suddenly hitting you. “Taeyong, oh my gof Taeyong fuckk” You screamed out as he carried on pounding into you as he released your neck. His hands moved down to your clit, his thumb pressing down on it which made you cry out as he carried on hitting that spot inside of you, your body already sensitive from the last two times you had cum already.
“Cum with me baby”He said as he moved close to your, his pace not faltering. You could feel that unforgiving knot in your stomach tightening again as you let Taeyong’s pants hit your ear. “Wish I could come inside you baby, paint your walls white, would you like that”He growled which had you whimpering back. “You would wouldn’t you sweet girl, fuck”He moaned as your walls clenched around him as his words sent you over the edge. Your body shook violently under him as he carried on the assault of your clit. You felt Taeyong twitch inside you as he began whispering a mix of profanities and your name into you. Taeyong pulled you hips so close to him you could feel his hip bones press into you as he came. The feeling of him filling the condom sent another mini orgasm over you as he let out a long groan before pulling out of you. You watched the ceiling with hazy eyes as you basked in the feeling of the thin layer of sweat began turn cold as Taeyong moved to throw the condom in the bin. He rushed into the bathroom and came back with a wet cloth, moving to wipe at you which had you wincing. “Sorry I was too rough for your first time right”He said a worried look on your face. “Wait how did you know it was my first time you” You quietly asked as he threw the cloth somewhere. He shrugged before joining you on the bed “Kind of just knew i guess” He said as he pulled his covers over the both of you. You looked away from him and back to the ceiling as you let your eyes close. “I liked it”You smiled as you let your breathing slow. “good”was all you heard from him before you let sleep consume you.
143 notes · View notes
Hi~~~ since requests r open can I please get uhhhhhh sum Good shisui fluff?? Ik it’s not helpful but literally . Any kind of happy feelings ok my boy NEEDS HAPPINESS ;-; I LOVE HIM SM BUT THERES ONLY ANGST TTOTT THANK U~~~~ ✨
A/N: yes qween 💫🧚♀️ you asked, therefore I will serve and yes I wrote it like an hour after I received the request.. bc this is my first request ever and I was dying w excitement
Even tho I am lowkey very minimally educated in Shisui bc I remember when I was watching the episodes w him I was multitasking in writing an essay for school. It’s okay though, I tried my best
Also I’m too lazy to actually write a full on fluff one shot rn and idk if you wanted a oneshot or hc’s but I’ll do HCs rn and I’ll also make sure to work in a fluff oneshot over the weekend <3 I’ll probably post it sometime next week tho bc my teachers love choking me w assignments!
✎ Fluff headcanons x Shisui
He’s definitely a protective boyfriend, but not in an overbearing way. Like if he thinks a mission you’re going on is dangerous, he will try and talk you out of it. If you refuse to, then he will probably suggest that the two of you do some training before you leave — that way he can at least give you some tips before you go.
Will train with you whenever you both have time — if you’re not an Uchiha or don’t have sharingan — he will teach you how to break out of their genjutsus, period. Even if you’re not a ninja, he will still have you train somewhat. He does this out of fear of the Uchihas and the Leafs tension. He wants to make sure you are gonna be able to protect yourself incase he isn’t there to protect you.
That stuff didn’t sound real fluffy so here is where the fulffy shit starts :
He’s respectful as fuck, like he won’t do anything you’re not comfortable with. There’s never any pda aside from the cute shit like hand holding and maybe him having his arm around you when in public. he does love having you beside him tho, so he will attach you to his hip. When you two are alone though he will be way more touchy — with a dash of needy.
Likes forehead kisses — both receiving AND giving them. Honestly just likes kissing in general if I’m being honest here. Cheek kisses, neck kisses, hand kisses, nose kisses. Anywhere that he can, he will kiss.
After long missions all he wants to do is go and see you. He would prefer to sleep yes, but it would be better if he could sleep next to you. So even if he’s tired he will drag himself to your place just for cuddles and kisses. After missions though he especially prefers if you were the one giving him kisses. He will melt.
As for the cuddling, he’s constantly changing in the way that he wants to cuddle. Like after a mission he wants your body literally plastered to his, like full on your almost laying on top of him type beat OR he’s the one laying on top of you. If it’s a lazy day he would want his head on your lap or chest so that you could run your hands through his hair. He can be both the big spoon or the little spoon but expect him to literally engulf your body when he’s the big spoon, just because he wants to feel close to you.
Also he loves being outside together?? Like just going on long walks where he can once again attach you to his hip and you two can just talk. He loves the sound of your voice though, so he’ll most times prefer to listen to you instead of the opposite. 10/10 will stick a flower in your hair. You two could sit down on a blanket and just stare out at the nature and the sky for hours and he would love every second of it.
He would be so good with kids too, like if you have a younger sibling they will adore him and vice versa. When he swings by your place he will definitely give them some sweets or something cool he found on a mission. They’ll probably ask him to play ninja with them and he’ll drag you into it too. They will low key like him more than they like you.
Likes giving you little things, but will overflow with happiness if you ever ge him anything. You bought him a bracelet once from a village you passed through on a mission and he refuses to ever take it off. Literally anything you give him he will keep in his room and cherish. He likes buying you flowers and cute little Knick knacks.
Lives for being alone with you! Like you two are all alone together at your place, the window is open, there is a slight breeze and the sun is shining into your room and he is once again tangling his body with yours and will most likely fall asleep.
Also likes getting praise from you, he will be the most supportive boyfriend ever, but he needs love too. Will go out of his way to watch you doing your hobbies or things you’re proud of. Compliments you a lot as well, they’re sweet comments about how pretty you look or how smart you are, etc. His heart will skip a few beats though if you return that energy with him. Telling him he has soft hair? He didn’t expect himself to literally beam at that. He likes being called smart, strong, brave, etc... Your compliments definitely fuel motivation for him.
Thinks about you all the time on missions. If something exciting happens his first thought is that he can’t wait to tell you about this on your next walk together. Or if he sees flowers he thinks about how nice they’d look in your hair.
Overall: soft, respectful man we must stan
171 notes · View notes
Ooh how bout bakugou walk in on s/o while she's having a relapse of "bad habits". Bad habit is your choice. Basically a comfort😂
Warning: self harm, blood, swearing, panic attack?
He had a long day. Training, classes, homework, studying, having to put up with annoying people really sucked the energy out of him. On top if that, he was a bit grumpy since you hadn’t talked to him all day. You were extremely quiet today, avoiding everybody as if they had the plague. When someone would ask you something, you would just reply with the shortest answer possible. Even when Monoma insulted you, instead of giving a witty and sassy reply and putting him in his place, you just took it. That is what concerned him the most.He was currently making his way to your room to check up on you.
He knew what could happen if your mind was in a bad enough place. He had found out about your bad habits when you were showering together and he saw the faint scares on your wrist and thighs. You didn’t think that they were visible enough for him to notice, but he pays attention to every little thing on your body. He had made you promise him to never do it again, and to come to him when you felt the need too. And you did, for 2 months you had pushed yourself to resist the urge and go to him, you were clean for 2 months.
But that had ended today. It was just a shitty day to begin with. You woke up feeling like shit and had no motivation to get out of bed, let alone go to school. But you forced yourself. You had also decided to not tell Katsuki about how you were feeling, afraid that you were burdening him. Your parents had called you too, and when you told them that you weren’t feeling well, they told you to suck it up and stop faking it for attention. You even ignored everyone at school, in fear that if you started talking you might burst into tears.
When you arrived back at your dorm you burst into tears, thinking about how nobody cared about you and only wanted you for their personal gain or only talked to you out of pity or because they had to.
The thoughts began to consume you, going from faint whispers to loud screams in your head. It was agonizing. You couldn’t stop them, no matter how much you tried, all you could hear were yells about how useless you were and how you should just die. You couldn’t hear anything else as you fell to your knees, griping and pulling your hair with your hands as you pressed your forehead to the floor. You needed to do something to make the voices stop. In the past when this would happen, you would usually harm yourself with a blade that still sat in your desk drawer. It would usually help to calm you down and right now you weren’t thinking straight as you were desperate and terrified that you would go to greater measures to stop the voices. Your sobbing body stumbled over to the hiding place of your tool and pulled it out. You were happy to know that your misery would soon stop temporarily. You slid down against the side of your bed, face drenched in tears that were still cascading down your red cheeks. You were crying and screaming, trying to hear anything apart from the voices but your efforts were in vain. Your shakey hand brought the blade up to your wrist and started cutting. The pain and the blood oozing out of the wound was enough to calm down the screaming thoughts. But then, what you had feared most happened, you couldn’t stop. You kept cutting and cutting, all the way down your forearm. Suddenly, the door burst open. There he was, standing under the door frame, panting from running here, probably after he heard your screams.
Katsuki wasted no time and ran to your side. You had noticed that he had entered but didn’t stop cutting or even spare him a glance. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING STOP" He quickly grabbed your hand with the blade in it and pried it out of your hand. Once you felt the cold metal leave your grip, you snapped out of it. You looked at your wrist that was now covered in blood, and then looked at katsuki. You stared at him, realizing that you had broken your promise and he had caught you in the act. Tears well up in your eyes again, ashamed at your actions. All you would do was whisper out an "I’m sorry" before tears came gushing out of your eyes again. He placed the blade down beside him and pulled you to his chest. He had one hand putting pressure on your wounds, trying to slowdown the bleeding while he looked for something to stop it with, and the other rubbing soothing circles on your back. He spotted a towel laying at the end of your bed and grabbed it, pressing it again your wounds. His hand was all bloodied up and it honestly made him sick knowing that it was yours, knowing that you were hurt enough to bleed. He pet your hair, trying to calm you down as you cried into his shoulder. "Let it out y/n, just let it out". He rocked back and forward, thinking of what to do next.
After a few minutes, you managed to calm yourself down. Your grip on his shirt loosened and you started taking deep and steady breath’s just like Katsuki was instructing you to do. "We should get you to recovery girl" he said, going to hoist you up to your feet. "No! I don’t want anyone to see me like this". He understood where you were coming from. "Will you let me help you then?" He asked, soften his tone. You hesitantly nod your head and he stood up to get the first aid kit that you kept in your room for minor injuries after training. He came back after finding it and sat down cross legged across from you on your bed. Both of you sat in silence while Katsuki patched you up. You had your head turned away from him, you were too embarrassed to look him in the face. "There, all done" he said while gently rubbing your wounded arm. "Thanks" you mumble out, pulling your arm away, still avoiding his gaze. "Hey" he called out, trying to get some sort of response from you. "Look at me". It was more like a demand at this point as he grabbed your chin to turn your head towards him. He raised your chin up along with his while looking down at you in an assertive yet somewhat soft look. "Talk to me". The words were so simple yet held so much power as you wanted to spill your guts to him. But the words wouldn’t come out of your mouth, your jaw just opened and closed as you were at a loss for words. "Alright then" he pushes you so that you were lying down on the bed and then crawled next to you. He tucked both of you under the covers and hugged you like a little kid hugging his teddy bear. "I’ll wait" is all he says. He knows how to get something out of you, don’t get me wrong, he did have good intentions, he just needed to know what was wrong so that he could help prevent it in the future and he knew how much you hated talking about your feelings. He also knew that the only way to get something like that out of you was to wait until you were tired. It didn’t take very long for you to feel sleepy. He then started asking you questions, if he were to straight up ask what was wrong, you probably wouldn’t even know yourself. He started asking how you felt this morning, who did you interact with, why didn’t you come to him, what happened when you came back to your room,ect. He managed to get the information he needed out of you, being cautious to only ask questions he knew you would be comfortable answering.
You could feel yourself starting to drift off to sleep, but before you could you mumbled something into Katsuki’s chest. "M’sorry i broke my promise, I panicked and didn’t know what to do" "if it were anything else I would tell you that it’s ok, but this is not, you can’t do things like that, what if you cut too deep or got an infection, I understand why you did it but next time something like that happens, try your best to contact me, but I garentee you that I will not let you out of my sight when you are alone. I will always be beside you. So make a new promis to me, promise me that you will come to me when you are sad, even if you are sad because your favorite character of whatever shitty show you watch dies, come to me" he knew that what he said came across as controlling but he had your best interest in mind. You hummed in response" I promise" as you linked pinky’s with him and started to fall asleep. He rubbed your back to aid you to ease into a peaceful slumber. Once he was sure you were asleep, he slowly crept out of your room with the blade in his hand. Let’s just say that with the help of a certain red head, that blade was destroyed into a million pieces. When they were finished, he went back to cuddle you with the most content smile plastered on his face.
I’m falling asleep while writing this😴 btw feel free to leave suggestions of ways I can improve my writing, I am still a beginner after all.
87 notes · View notes
The Old Guard-Rhyme Time
Chapter 2-A New Immortal
Posting this here as I need to motivate myself to write more of it-if only to call Merrick a cock again.
Our story moves again this time to Afghanistan
Where we meet a marine who’s called Nile Freeman.
A plucky young woman, she seems really neat
As she makes sure that every kid gets a sweet.
She’s soon set a task with both Jay and Dizzy
To go find a man. Where oh where is he?
The three set off, there’s intel to collect
Nile reminds them, of course, of the need for respect.
They enter a courtyard and Nile takes the lead
‘We’re looking for this man’ she begins to plead.
They’ve brought a translator from the market
A woman indicates the man is hiding behind a carpet.
The marines line up but then shots are fired
(Is all of this action making you tired?)
And now I simply have to attest
That the man is swiftly shot in the chest.
And then Nile, and how it hurts to admit it
But our dear Nile has her throat slit.
Dizzy is scared, you can see she looks sick
As she screams and screams for their medic.
Nile is terrified, a single tear is shed
But it’s clear to see the poor girl is dead.
The light now is white and the sun is bright.
We hear a horn and see a train
We’re back with our immortals again.
Andy sits, the tiredness etched on her face
As Nicky slumbers in Joe’s embrace.
It must be said that you will find
They always sleep this way, entwined.
Across from them Book sleeps alone
One arm across his face is thrown.
Andy blinks and it is not so odd
That she follows them to the land of nod.
The peace doesn’t last for the whole team
Immediately begin to dream.
It must be more than they can take
As all of them soon jerk awake.
But they are not the only ones with dreams
For Nile has seen them too it seems.
Yes, I know we thought she was dead
But she’s not. She’s immortal instead.
Andy simply cannot believe her eyes
After 200 years it’s a hell of a surprise.
Booker of course makes his first task
To take a sip from his hip flask.
Nicoló at his mouth is pawing
Whilst Joe gets ready to do some drawing
For not only has he a massive heart
He’s also really good at doing art.
They all discuss in detail what they’ve seen
Andy thinks this girl must be a Marine.
I must divulge she really does seem cross
Nicky says ‘Happens for a reason Boss.’
Joe, who really could not be kinder,
Is the first to say ‘We must find her.’
Booker flat out just does not agree
‘We should stick to the plan and find Copley’.
Emotions are very much in a whirl
But Nicky’s concern is to find the girl.
‘We know this happens to the unprepared
She is all alone and she must be scared.’
‘If we’re dreaming of her, she’s dreaming of us
That’s making her a beacon straight to us.’
Andy is peeved but the girl she must fetch.
As Joe hands over his completed sketch
Andy looks with a frown, worried maybe?
‘Jesus’ she says ‘She is just a baby.’
Back we go again to Afghanistan
To check in once more with our Nile Freeman
Since we last saw her they’ve removed the patch
‘Fuck me’ say her friends ‘not even a scratch.’
‘The doctors tried out a brand new skin graft’
But Jay and Dizzy both think this sounds daft.
Now to London to meet Steven Merrick
Who is, I’m afraid, completely a prick!
Bangs on about the chromosomal clock
Which just makes him sound like an utter cock.
Suddenly we spot Copley in the room
(This was before all events were on Zoom!)
We’re moving again but not very far
Copley and Merrick are now in a car.
‘You’ve seen my research you know they’re real’
(This video footage seems like a huge deal!)
They show the film to Meta Kozak
Not much to say now but she will be back.
Now things are getting really quite fraught
Merrick wants the whole gang to be caught
Copley looks just the teeniest bit glum
‘I think I might be able to get just one.’
‘I said I want them all, that’s what I mean
Now come up with a plan, work with Keane.’
Now you’ve not met Keane and not to slate him
But I guarantee you’re going to hate him.
Now I am aware it’s been a while
So why don’t we go back to visit Nile?
All around her now people just stare
And not because how much they care.
A sergeant tells her orders are through
Informing her of what she need do.
She must pack her bags without delay
For more tests she’ll be on her way.
Before she goes he hands back her tags
Then we see friends have packed her bags.
Feeling bereft and utterly alone
She listens to Frank Ocean on her phone.
But wait, what’s this? I can’t believe my eyes
It’s Andy, hiding, now that’s a surprise.
The army men have come for Nile
But Andy takes them out with guile.
(Oh ok, don’t shout at your bard
Actually she hits them. Really hard!)
Nile grabs a gun and points it at Andy
Who takes it from her like it is candy.
Nile blinks and then asks ‘Just who are you?’
‘Andromache the Scythian- that’s who.’
Then Andy smacks Nile right in the head
‘But you can call me Andy instead.’
10 notes · View notes
Stained Glass • Chapter 7 Pillow Talk
A/N: Hi!!!! I’m back! I hope you’re all ready for some fluffy/angsty goodness because here it is! xxx
Summery: Katie and Spencer have a talk.
Warnings: Mentions of wounds, PTSD, panic attacks, nightmares, angst, fluff, and the usual CM things (let me know if I missed anything!)
Word count: 3.3k
Chapter 6 • Masterlist
To say I was happy when I finally got to go home would be a major understatement. I was ecstatic. I wasn't allowed to drive and Spencer couldn't with his leg so Emily gladly volunteered to drive us back to my apartment.
After a lot of arguing Emily allowed me to carry my own bags inside while she carried Spencer’s. I could tell that Spencer felt bad about others having to do things for him while he was on crutches, even after I sat him down and told him it wasn't his fault.
As soon as I set foot in my apartment building I felt like I could breathe again, I hated hospitals, I always have. They just remind me of death and sadness. Growing up the only times I ever went to hospitals was to visit someone who was dying, I guess that just stuck with me.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, I smiled as I was hit by the familiar scent of cheap air freshener and Lysol.
”Katie?” Spencer asked from beside me.
I hummed in response and opened my eyes to look over at him.
I nodded, ”I’m good.”
The double doors opened and Emily walked in, ”Ok, the car is parked.” She said with a smile.
I tightened my grip on the bag in my hand, ”Shall we?” I looked between the two of them who nodded.
We entered the elevator and rode in silence up to the top floor where my apartment was. Spencer was leaned back against the wall of the elevator tapping his fingers nervously on the side of his crutches. I looked down at the tiled floor and traced the pattern with my eyes, I continued this until the elevator came to a stop and the doors slid open.
The three of us exited the elevator and began walking down the hall towards my apartment, ”You have no idea how happy I am to be home.” I looked over at Spencer who smiled, ”I am going to jump on my bed and sleep for a year.”
Emily raised an eyebrow at me, ”Jump?”
I sighed and stopped in front of the door which read 715, ”I am going to gently lay down on my bed.”
I pulled my keys out of my bag and unlocked the door which squeaked open as I turned the doorknob.
”Don't worry Emily, I won't let her get hurt.” Spencer reassured her as we all walked into my apartment.
I glanced back at Spencer as I flipped the lights on, ”You can't stop me.”
”I guarantee I can.” Spencer chuckled.
The light by my door lit the way for all of us to enter my small apartment and once we were all in Emily shut the door behind her and headed into the living room. I stopped a few feet from the door and looked around at the dimly lit room before letting out a content sigh and looking down at the floor.
Spencer followed Emily into the living room and walked over to the couch, Emily flipped the lamp on before looking over at me and furrowed her brows.
I looked up and blinked, ”Yeah?”
”You alright?” She asked.
I nodded and walked towards them before freezing, ”I’ll be right back.”
I turned on my heels and walked down the hallway towards my bedroom, I passed all the photos hanging on the walls and walked into my room before flipping the light on. I stepped into the cluttered room and looked around. Everything was exactly where I left it, the pile of clothes sitting on my chair hadn't moved and neither had the papers that covered my vanity.
I glanced over at my bed and spotted what I was looking for, a fuzzy blanket. I smiled and walked over to grab it before heading back out the door to join the other two in the living room.
When I walked in Emily was standing by the door and smiled when she saw me, ”I’m gonna get going, but if you two need anything give me a call ok?” She walked over and stood in front of me.
I nodded, ”Thanks for everything Emily.”
She smiled and gave me a gentle hug, ”I’ll see you both later.” She shot Spencer a smile which he returned from his seat on the couch.
Emily left and shut the door behind her and I locked the door before walking over and sitting down beside Spencer. I let out a content sigh before looking over at Spencer and smiling.
”Hi.” I said quietly.
He let out a small laugh, ”Hi.”
I tossed the blanket at him which caused him to smile, ”How’s your leg feeling?” I glanced down at his wounded leg.
He shrugged, ”It still hurts, just not as bad.” He shifted to face me and raised his brow, ”What about you? How're you feeling?”
I leaned my head on the back of the couch and stared at him, ”Ask me again when the pain medicine wears off.”
He looked over at the clock on the wall and let out a long breath, ”It’s only six o'clock and I'm tired.”
”Well, you have been sleeping on a rollaway bed in a hospital for the past week.” I ran a hand through my hair, ”I need a shower.”
”I need food.”
I leaned forward and pushed myself to my feet, ”How about you order a pizza while I go get a quick shower?”
He smiled, ”That is a wonderful idea.”
”I’ll be back.” I told him as I walked off to my room once again.
I didn't realize how much I missed my apartment until now, it's been almost two weeks since I'd been back here. My apartment is quite possibly my favorite place to be, especially after getting back from a long case. It's nice to just be at home and reset.
I shut my bedroom door behind me and walked over to my dresser to get some pajamas to change into after my shower. I didn't spend too much Tim searching for clothes, I pulled out a pair of black leggings and an old FBI Academy t-shirt and laid them at the end of my bed.
I walked into my bathroom and shut the door behind me before turning to face the mirror that hung on the wall.
I barely recognized the person staring back at me in the mirror. My hair sat in a bun at the top of my head just like it had for the past few days since I don't have the motivation or the ability to do anything else with it while I was in the hospital. My skin looked duller than it usually did and the circles under my eyes were even darker than normal. The bruise on my forehead had started to fade a bit so it was no longer dark purple, instead of was a yellowish-brown color.
Overall, I looked like a hot mess.
I pulled my eyes away from the mirror and looked down at my hands. The dark bruises around my wrists were following the same course as my other bruises and had begun to fade to a lighter color. The cuts from the zip ties, however, were going to leave some nasty scars.
I walked over to the shower and turned on the water so that I could take a nice hot shower. While I waited for the water to heat up I began to take off my clothes. I made sure to be careful not to hurt myself as I took my shirt off and tossed it to the floor, once my clothes were piled up in the corner of the bathroom I walked over to the shower and stepped into the stream of hot water.
As soon as the water hit my skin I felt myself begin to relax. I stepped under the water and let it begin to run over my hair and rinse away the day, I closed my eyes and let the water do its work.
This was the first time I had really taken a moment to think about what happened, not that I really wanted to. All I wanted was to forget about what happened, forget about it and move on because if I don't I'm afraid of what will happen.
I've seen what those kinds of things can do to people and I'm terrified it will happen to me.
Aaron has always been the tough one. Between him, Sean, and I, Aaron was the one who took care of things.
I washed my hair the best I could with one fully functional arm, once that was done I let the water run over my face for a few more minutes before I finally reached down and turned it off.
I stood in the shower for a moment before opening the glass door and reaching out for the towel that hung on the wall. I wrapped the towel around my body before stepping out onto the bath mat and beginning to carefully dry myself off. Once I was no longer dripping water all over my bathroom I towel dried my hair with my good arm before wrapping myself in the towel once again.
I exited my bathroom and walked back into my room where I left my clothes. I stopped in front of the large mirror that hung on my wall and looked at my reflection again, this time my eyes settled on the two bullet wounds that sat on my chest.
I stared at the two stitched up wounds and brought my fingers up to touch them. The dull pain in my chest suddenly changed to sharp, hot pain. I squeezed my eyes shut to stop tears from escaping them. For a moment I couldn't breathe and I started to panic, but that moment was cut short when someone knocked on my bedroom door.
”Katie?” Spencer’s voice broke me out of my state of panic and brought me back to reality, ”The pizzas here.”
I brought my hand up and wiped my eyes before answering, ”One minute.”
I grabbed my clothes from the edge of my bed and quickly got dressed before heading to the door. I pulled the door open to see Spencer still standing on the other side with a worried look on his face.
”Enjoy your shower?” He asked.
I nodded, ”No place like your own bathroom.” I gave him a quick smile.
”It must have been a nice shower, you were in there for almost an hour.”
I furrowed my brows at him, ”An hour? Really?”
Spencer nodded, ”You hungry?”
”Very.” I ran my hand through my wet hair ad followed Spencer back to the living room where the pizza sat on the coffee table, ”Do you wanna watch a movie?” I looked back at him while I sat down.
Spencer sat down and laid his crutches down beside the couch, ”I’m picking this time.” He leaned forward and grabbed the TV remote off of the coffee table.
”What you don't like my picks?” I smirked and grabbed a piece of pizza.
”I love your picks, but I want to watch this.” He turned on Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan.
I pulled my legs up onto the couch and pulled the blanket over myself, ”This is a good one.”
The two of us ended up eating the entire pizza and nearly falling asleep by the time the movie finished. I had begun using Spencer’s shoulder as a pillow about thirty minutes into the movie and he, in turn, used my head as his pillow.
I could have stayed on the couch all night honestly, Spencer’s shoulder was one of the comfiest things on earth. I didn't move from my spot beside him until he began to stir.
”No!” I groaned.
His shoulder shook as he let out a low chuckle, ”You know, your bed is probably comfier than my shoulder.”
I shook my head, ”Your shoulder is nice though.”
”My shoulder is numb.” He brought his arm around my shoulder and gave me a quick side hug.
”My bed is comfy though.” I sighed and sat up from his shoulder.
He looked over at me with a smile on his face, ”Exactly.” He leaned forward and grabbed his crutches from the floor, ”Come on.”
I watched him stand and get his crutches situated under his arms before he started walking towards my room. I sat on the couch for a moment and rubbed my eyes before slowly standing to my feet and following after Spencer.
When I walked into my room Spencer was sitting on the edge of the bed digging through his bag which sat beside him,
”You sir, ” I poked his shoulder, ”Are in my way.”
He pulled his sweat pants and shirt out of his bag before zipping it up and looking over at me, ”Well, let me get out of your way then.” He smiled playfully at me before heading off to the bathroom to change.
I rolled my eyes before walking over to the side of the bed and throwing the covers back. Spencer and I shared a bed all the time, we usually roomed together on cases, he stayed over at my place all the time, and I stayed over at his place all the time.
I climbed under the blanket and laid back on my pillow before reaching over and grabbing my phone off of my nightstand. I turned the phone on and seen I had a few missed texts so I checked them.
The first was from Penelope, she was making sure Spencer and I were ok and didn't need anything. The second was from Derek, he was planning on stopping by tomorrow to visit. The third and final text was from my brother Sean.
Sean - Hey Katie, I heard about what happened to you and Aaron. How're you?
I stared down at the text for longer than I should have before responding.
Katie - I’m home now. Aaron got to go home a few days ago but I wasn't so lucky.
Sean - How are you doing?
Katie - I'm fine.
Spencer walked back into the room dressed in sweat pants and a red t-shirt, he walked to the opposite side of the bed and climbed under the blankets, ”Everything ok?”
I looked over at him, ”Yeah, why?”
He raised an eyebrow, ”You're doing that thing with your face.” He gestured to his face with his hand and mimicked my own.
”What thing?” I cocked my head to the side.
He laughed, ”Your eyebrows are all scrunched together and you're chewing the inside of your lip.”
I looked back at my phone, ”Sean texted me.”
”Your brother Sean?” He glanced from me to my phone.
I nodded, ”He hasn't been in contact with me in almost two years.” I glanced back at the man beside me.
”Well, what did he say?”
I shrugged, ”He wanted to know how I was doing.”
”And what did you say?” He asked me.
I turned my phone off and placed it back on the nightstand, ”The truth. I'm fine.”
I felt Spencer's gaze on me but he said nothing as I rolled over on my side and flipped the lamp off.
I woke up gasping for breath and clinging to my pillow like it was my only lifeline. The room was dark and the only sound I could hear was the ticking of a clock. I sat up and looked around the room while trying my best to slow my breathing down.
My eyes landed on the closed door across the room and for a moment I thought about running over to it, then I felt someone staring at me.
I turned to my left and immediately moved back towards the end of the bed to try and get away from the man beside me.
”How did you get in here?” I stared at Foyet with a look of disgust.
He reached behind his and turned on the lamp, an orange glow illuminated behind him, ”I don't know what you're talking about.” He turned back to face me and let out a low chuckle.
I backed closer to the edge of the bed and got ready to run for it. Before I could do anything Foyet reached out and grabbed my arm, holding me in place.
I immediately began to panic, ”No, let go of me!” I pulled against his grip but it was useless.
My breathing picked up and I frantically looked around the room for a way to get out of here.
My head snapped back to the man holding me, the voice that came from his mouth didn't match the man I was looking at.
”Please.” I felt hot tears begin to make their way down my cheeks.
”Katie!” Again, the voice coming from Foyet’s mouth was not his.
I stared at him and tried to focus on his face, ”What do you want?” I pleaded to him for an answer.
”Katie! Listen to me!”
One minute I was starting at Foyet and the next I was starting at Spencer, and he looked worried.
”Spencer?” I stared at him and blinked the tears from my eyes.
Spencer looked back at me, his eyes filled with concern, ”It’s me, you're safe.”
I ignored the screaming pain in my stomach ad shoulder and wrapped my arms around Spencer and buried my face in his shoulder. He carefully accepted the hug and held onto me just as tight as held onto him, this was his way of silently telling me I was safe. Neither of us said a word, we just stayed there on the bed wrapped in each other's arms
I grabbed fist fulls of his shirt and sucked in a sharp breath, ”You weren't you.” I doubted he could hear me because my face was still buried in his shirt.
”You don't have to hold it in Katie, it's just me here.” And that was all it took for the flood gates to open.
I began sobbing into his shirt as he held me and ran his hand up and down my back. Every few minutes would let out a shaky breath and he would hug me a little tighter each time.
We stayed like that for a long time, just holding each other, being there for each other. Eventually, I stopped crying and finally spoke.
”I’m not ok.” I mumbled quietly.
I felt Spencer let out a long breath, ”I know, and that's ok.” He released me from his hold so he could look at my face, ”You don't have to be ok, you don't have to pretend to be ok either.”
”I’m supposed to be able to get through this, it's my job.” I stared at him.
He shook his head, ”No, our job is to help people. And to do that we see some pretty terrible things, and what you went through was horrible. If I could trade places with you I would in a heartbeat.” He brought his hand up and wiped my cheek with his thumb, ”You need to get some rest.”
I nodded, ”Cuddles?”
A smile broke out on Spencer’s face as he nodded, ”Come here.”
He laid back down on his pillow and held his arm out for me, I laid down beside him and lay my head on his chest. His arm immediately went around my shoulder and pulled me closer to him before reaching to turn the lamp off.
”Tell me something.” I pulled the blanket up to my chin.
”Tell you what?” He asked.
I shrugged, ”I don't know, something I don't know.”
He stayed silent for a moment before speaking, ”According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and a head with two faces.” He ran his thumb along my shoulder as he spoke. ”Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves.”
I closed my eyes as he spoke, ”What happened when they found their other half?”
He hummed, ”They were finally at peace.”
I drifted off to that thought. Peace.
@chans-wife @eternalharry @aberrant-annie @thatsonezesty13 @l0ve-0f-my-life @satans-0-spawn @fortrapsandfordaphne @shannongubler @madcrazy50 @inkedsoldier @kikirosie @ladyravenclaw @alliyjane @ajwantsapancake @fanfictionreader05 @mirjanak @bbdoyouloveme @danandphilfan6 @scarletraine @sammypotato67 @winchestergirl907 @lyka-k @assassinsasha23 @hot-mess-express99 @wander-lustbabe
44 notes · View notes
Original Fiction Sorta Pt 1
I don’t have the motivation to get out of bed today. I know I should, and I tell myself this as I stare at my ceiling, but I know it won’t change what I do. So, I turn over and try to go back to sleep. Maybe then I won’t feel guilty for my apathy.
There’s so much I should care enough about to pull myself out of bed, but I don’t. I’m too tired. I’m too stressed. I need to cry or scream or do something to feel anything other than this sullen nothingness, but I don’t. I doubt I have the willpower to force myself.
You need to move. I tell myself again. Get food at least. If you skip meals then people will worry about you. That’s the last thing I need. When you tell people that you’ve been skipping meals, they all react so uncomfortably. I don’t want to make people uncomfortable. I don’t want people to worry about me, because I’ll be ok. I have to be. I always have been ok. It’s almost a part of my job to be ok. Everybody expects the most of me, I can’t make them worry that I’m self-sabotaging, that I won’t succeed, that I’m not the golden child that will prove that they were good parents, good teachers, good friends.
Even this isn’t enough to pull me out of bed, so I try to think of an excuse. Why aren’t you going to dinner? I could say that I’m eating the food in my dorm, but after how I’ve acted recently they might not believe me. And besides, I don’t want to talk to them. The thought of talking to anybody right now makes me feel disgusted.
The phone rings. It’s Mary, one of my friends. “Are you coming to dinner?” She’ll ask. And I’ll have to go, or face the reproving looks, and the lectures, and the worry. So I don’t answer. Maybe they’ll think I’m asleep, that’s what I want to be doing anyway.
Do you want to know how people react when a skinny young girl tells them she’s been skipping meals? Their eyes go wide at first, and it’s like you can see the alarm bells going off in their head. They're worried about you, and any conversation you were having or might have had is abandoned to focus entirely on you. Their voice is soft, but reproving. They seem to think that either scolding or comforting will help, but neither will. They assume the worst, but it’s not that. I know I’m skinny. In fact, I look better with a couple more pounds on my hips. No, it’s not that. I don’t know what it is, really, why I have these nothing days, when I can’t stand the thought of dealing with people, and I barely have the energy to go down the hall to the restroom.
I know what I need to do, but I can’t muster the energy to do it. Take a shower, go for a walk, call a friend, eat some food, any of these things would help. Take me out of the small isolating box that is my dorm room. But I can’t, because I don’t want to. So I lay on my bed and hope that soon my physical tiredness will catch up to how tired I feel in my bones, so I’ll be able to ignore the stress and the guilt and just sleep.
But my head’s going too fast, and I can’t stop thinking about what I should be doing. Eating. Doing the homework assignment that was due this morning. And, if I’m honest with myself, calling the college’s counseling center wouldn’t be a bad idea either. But I know I won’t do these things, so instead, I pull out my laptop and open youtube. If I can’t sleep then I will fill my eyes and ears with nothingness until I can. Eventually, I eat a pack of oreos that I have lying around in my dorm room, but that is the only concession to self care that I make that day, and only because I am too hungry for the sweet nothingness of sleep. Sleep, my one motivating factor.
1 note · View note
Title: Their Love Story
Word Count: 2.103
Warnings: no one
She wants the best for him for me, even if her love was forbidden from the start, the young couple despised it, because instead of that their connection got worse or something else.
This tickled the tingling in the stomach with hundreds of butterflies and thus the connection stronger, which gives the young couple the courage to do what they had planned for a long time.
Every evening the young prince sneaked out of his room just to see his diamond, even if the young farmer tells him in the eye that she doesn't have any special features, her lover thinks she herself is radiantly beautiful like the moon.
Right now the young prince is running but thinking about their first meeting.
Beginning of flashback
After an argument he had with his mother again, the Ash blonde prince climbed out of his window.
Luck was at his side, as well as the moon, arrived safe on the ground, he ran at speed in the middle of nowhere in the hope that he would see a hut in which no one was alive.
When he arrived he saw the hut, it wasn't as dirty as expected, rather clean and pretty much.
When the prince noticed that this was not an uninhabited hut, the prince wanted to disappear quickly, but in vain.
The (H / C) farmer, enter her hut, she heard steps, which is why she heard her voice "Mother are you at home?" wondered from the entrance and looked towards the stairs.
The young prince held his hand in front of his mouth and thus hoped not to make a sound.
With quiet and slow steps he went towards the window, but when he ran against one of the beds and made a sound "Ouch!" he said loudly and painfully, rubbing his hip lightly.
(Y / N) who was downstairs immediately took a knife from the kitchen and ran upstairs into the bedroom, when she arrived she held the knife tight in her hands and shouted "Who the hell are you ?!"
The prince held his hands protectively in front of him and immediately said "Wait, wait, wait - I am Prince Katsuki Bakugou and I don't want to harm you that could harm you."
Even so, the (H / C) hairy one remained stubborn and said "Yes and I am the Queen of England."
The person opposite sighed annoyed and showed her the small different coats of arms that are embroidered on his clothes, immediately the meaningless farmer went on her knees and said "Please forgive me for my actions, as a disrespectful resident, I should show you respect, yes instead of that- "
Immediately the prince took the farmer in his arms and said "Tch, there is no thing you have to apologize for."
End of flashback
Now in the full moon, the young couple is running to a certain place, where Katsuki stole their first kiss.
Both arrived, Katsuki held her hand and said "For our love." he said this to the love of his life, but what do they want?
They want to run away because their love is forbidden as I said, but shortly before she gave him an answer, everything went black out of nowhere.
Unsuspecting, the farmer was standing in the middle of nowhere, but hoped with all her heart that her lover, Katsuki, would reappear at any time so that the couple, who were in love from head to toe, could finally disappear from this city and finally a new love.
"(Y / N), wake up now this is my last warning!" came a familiar voice.
Immediately the (H / C) hairy eyes opened wide and stared against those of her mother, Kayama Nemuri, also known as Midnight.
"Was- what time is it?" (Y / N) asked Tired and easily scratched her hair while her mother tapped her left foot on the floor and finally said "20 before the doorbell rings you know that I have to go now, breakfast is ready."
When the mother said this to her daughter, she made her way to the car so that she can drive there, although it is only about 10 minutes on foot. The mother prefers to use her car for which she only needs less than 5 minutes.
Without thinking further, (Y / N) pulled her clothes through her room and immediately afterwards put on her school uniform.
Fortunately, she had changed the school books last night now she still has to have breakfast, brush her teeth, put on shoes and then run to the UA.
Arrived, besides breathing (Y / N) sat down in her seat which is on Momo's view on the left side "(Y / N) -san, are you okay? Have you injured yourself? Or have you overslept?"
Her best friend asked the half-sleepy girl, she pointed with her finger 3 to indicate that she had overslept again.
But shortly before the black-haired one could offer her best friend something to drink, the class teacher came with his yellow sleeping bag and today's class began.
"Finally school finishes!" said Denki who runs next to you and stretched his arms, but yawned a bit loudly.
Which is why Katsuki turned to you and admonished the boy with a flash in his hair "Don't be so loud, idiot."
"Hey, I'm not an idiot!" your friend justified himself, while the other turned around to you again and told him in the eyes that he should like to shut up because his voice was annoying.
"Denki is not an idiot, so shut up and please turn around now!" you said loudly and looked him in the eye.
He just snapped his tongue, turned and walked on again.
You as Bakusquad had agreed to make a film evening at Bakugou, but the idea came spontaneously and Mina had the idea that it should take place at Bakugou's house.
Of course he was against it, but we pleaded with him it took about half an hour, but ultimately it was worth what you are all happy about.
Arrived, Denki and Kirishma made themselves comfortable on the couch, while Sero got the snacks out of our pockets.
Bakugou fetches snacks from the kitchen, while Mina and I decide which film to watch, easier than we thought.
Since we have no idea what to watch, we came to the living room and waited until Sero and Bakugou came.
When the two of them entered the living room, Mina asked "Which movie do we want to watch?"
Kirishma looked at us a bit puzzled by this question, because the redhead thought that we had already agreed on a film.
Luckily it was Friday today and we were allowed to stay at Bakugou because we wanted to spend more time and his parents are not there for the weekends, so it is an advantage to be together outside of school or dormitory.
However, I realized that I had left my pajamas, toothbrush and charger at home.
While the others were discussing which film we should watch, I picked up my cell phone and sent my mother a message - if she could bring me the things that are already in one of my pockets, a minute later she asked for the address and wrote that she could give me the bag in about 10-15 minutes.
"Oi, dumbass, what are you doing there come!" came the voice of Bakugou.
I came and saw that Bakugou had joined Kirishma and that there was still some space next to the Ash blonde, which is why I sat down next to him and immediately asked "What do we want to watch?"
"Well, I'm for Iron Man, but Mina is for Titanic." Denki said, pointing to the TV screen that is already being shown on Iron Man.
Mina, who works for Titanic, says "Nobody watches something like that, so who's for-" but shortly before she finished her sentence, Kirishma's voice rang out, "How about we watch another film ... how about one Comedy?"
The two thought for a moment until they agreed and make themselves comfortable with the others.
After about 10 minutes after the start of the film, the doorbell rang, and the (H / C) hairy girl immediately went on her way until someone stopped her "What are you doing?" Bakugou asked annoyed.
(Y / N) looked a little puzzled at her counterpart but said "My mother is here to give me the things, so pajamas, Za-" "Yes, ok go." Bakugou muttered a little annoyed and gently pushed her away from him towards the door.
In front of the door (Y / N) opened this while Bakugou stood a little further back and immediately out of nowhere opened his mouth in shock "Thanks again, okāsan." said (Y / N) and hugged her mother.
The mother replied and kissed the top of her hair and then looked at Bakugou "I have a nice evening washing you." she said and made her way to the car again - turned around again and waved to her daughter until she closed the door.
"Hey? Your mother is Midnight, why didn't you tell me about it, dumbass ?!" he asked her, causing small explosions on her hands.
(Y / N) gave him a strange look, but still answered with a "Yes, yes that is it, why do you make something like that into a big deal?"
Bakugou crossed his arms in front of his breasts and looked at her a bit sternly. "I don't know, because my best friend doesn't tell me that her mother is a Pro Hero?"
(Y / N) giggled slightly at his answer and said "Come on, the film has already started." and pointed with her thumb in the direction of the living room.
He rolled his ruby eyes and went into the living room, followed with (Y / N).
About 2 hours have already passed and almost everyone has fallen asleep, watched by Bakugou and (Y / N) those who brought others to his room and made themselves comfortable in the living room again.
(Y / N) 's head is leaning on Bakugou's shoulder, the silence fell, but it wasn't an embarrassing silence, but rather a pleasant one.
When (Y / N) was about to close her (E / C) eyes, Bakugou shook her lightly and said softly "Come with me." and thus took her hand making her cheeks instantly glowed with a red color.
Yes, (Y / N) has had a crush on her best friend for a long time, yet she suppresses these feelings and tries as best as possible to pretend he's just a simple best friend.
"Put your shoes on." he said monotonously.
I was amazed, if not very, but I left the ulterior motives aside and put on my shoes and jacket and then went out with him.
It's been about half an hour while the two of us go nowhere.
The silence was broken by my voice, "Where are we going?" I asked Bakugou and looked up on the right and stared into his ruby red eyes, which were illuminated by the full moon.
"We'll be there in a minute and please stop staring at me with those eyes." he said in a normal tone, which is quite strange of him.
I saw the ground after he said this.
After another few minutes, which felt more like an eternity, we arrived ...
This place, it resembled 1 to 1 my dream that I still had this morning.
With my mouth open, I looked at the surroundings until he held my hand and turned me to him.
"(Y / N)." when he said my name, my real name, my stomach was already tingling with butterflies, but I tried in vain to stay normal.
"I ..." briefly inhaled the air across from her, looked for the right words until he let the oxygen out of his lungs and started talking.
"I know that we have a good friendship, if not a nice one ... nevertheless I would like to tell you here and now among us that you are the prettiest girl I know, you are pretty, helpful, you always think of your friends and try to help everyone as you can. You have many qualities that cannot be counted because you are already perfect yourself ... that's why I want to ask you, do you want to be my girlfriend? "
With tears in her eyes she nodded (Y / N) and immediately wraps her arms around Bakugou's waist, he removed her arms around himself - took his hands on her cheeks and gave her a beautiful kiss that the two of them will never forget.
With me when the young couple in love wanted to go to his house asked (Y / N) "Katsu, should we tell the others?"
He took her hand and both of them stopped until he said, "For our love, I would do anything."
5 notes · View notes
send a 👫 and I’ll write four headcanons i have about our muses’ relationship.
ok so. lana has a habit of sharing food as one of her many love languages i think. she jst likes.... giving ppl things even if it means she’ll have less. she’d let a wolf make a meal out of her n eat every last piece if she loved him n she knew he’d feel full. bt of everyone i feel like teddy hs always been the one she does this w most.... like even when they first met in the cafeteria she gave him spoonfuls of her greek yogurt n honey. whenever she’s eating fruit (which is a lot she’s obsessed w strawberries n peaches n grapes n tangerines n oranges) she’ll ALWAYS give him half whether tht’s segmenting up pieces or dividing bites evenly between them n Without Fail it’ll always b half tht she gives him whereas she might give other ppl like.... a bite or a piece or two bt......... it’s rly specific each time tht she gives teddy half. it isn’t even intentional it’s jst like a subconscious thing bt if we were to slide on spectacles n analyse this in an english class fr it’s Meaning then. looks at u then looks away. i think this represents the way tht teddy hs always felt like another half of her. they’re one in the same. in a lot of ways they’re very similar mayb even................ TOO similar n that’s why it’s been sch a fking.... bastard of trying to work things out ever bc they very much hv the same rampant commitment issues n bad timing n fears of never being gd enough. i feel like in the past a guy she ws dating (noncommittally as lana tended to do these things) wld have even noticed this n it would have bugged him a lot just like... how close she was w teddy in general............. n he would’ve one day brought it up in the middle of a fight he’d picked jst cutting away from what they were talking abt to be like. u only ever give me one bite but u would give teddy all of it if he asked u to. tell me i’m wrong. n she’d scoff out a laugh in disbelief looking around like omg...... all this over a fruit...... what are u even sa-- n he’d cut her off n be like. literally tell me i’m wrong lana. n she wouldn’t even b able to after going quiet n rly realising what it was he was actually Saying. he’d storm out. relationship over. icons of always being a little bit in love w each other n not even noticing it until someone else points it out <3
god. sighs dramatically at the idea i jst had. i cn imagine in la verse lana being rly drunk getting bk from a date one time n inevitably it was just some random loser since she’s back to dating Trash in this era bc she just truly cbas trying after her breakup w dom n............. it would be like a parallel to tht one time they’d fallen out over him sleeping w imogen when she ws upset w him bt crawled into his bed drunk at a party just to lie w him for a little while despite everything...... she wld have gone to his instead of hers on some drunken automatic pilot n somehow got into his room n..... she’d clamber in n flop nxt to him n maybe it wld be funny at first if he woke up n was like lana what the fk...... are u doing here.... so disorientated n confused.......... n she’d just be joking initially bt very clearly drunk like making fun of her date talking abt how he kept complimenting his own hair n calling himself a tesla in a sea of prius’ n checking himself out in every window they passed n then the laughter wld slowly trickle off n she’d go kind of quiet fr a moment n maybe teddy wld assume she ws passing out bc she’d drank sm bt after a short silence she’d perk up with a mumble out of nowhere n, barely conscious of what she’s saying, b like “why didn’t u wait for me like u said u would”. n if he was like.............. huh? she’d have her eyes shut n just b murmuring half awake then open them sleepily to look at him n rly quietly be like........ “u promised”. mayb she’d even reach out to gingerly trace his face bt then her wrist wld go slack bc she was rly tired n she’d just wriggle closer n tuck her head to get comfy n be like “warm” then promptly fall asleep. JSGSFKGHFHGKHGSFKH. literally jst jolting him awake w this rarely serious n genuine conversation then passing out. jst the worst fk teddy’s life bet he lay there staring at the ceiling fr so long after tht one <3 lana wouldn’t remember this in the morning either she’d wake up like why am i here........ did we meet up last night............ teddy jst like >_> u crashed here it was nbd.
i picture the first week they moved to LA lana wldn’t have admitted it bt she wld be feeling rly homesick............ radcliffe was very much like the first place she truly felt was her home n she’d miss all of the ppl there n just the general area A Lot............. one night i can see her jst wanting to spend with teddy to have like a sense of familiarity in an unfamiliar city (even if she’s spent a decent amt of time there over the yrs bc of jameson records hving studios etc bt still) n i’m imagining them like. breaking into an indoor swimming complex that her n her friends in high skl used to break into in the summers when they vacationed yrs ago.... maybe lana still has a key cut tht works from a connection she made bk then idk <3 it doesn’t matter <3 n they’d inevitably be drunk n just messing around n splashing each other n doing handstand competitions n all the typical..... fun frivolous childish antics lana n teddy tend to get into whenever they’re around each other.... truly jst transformed into big kids whenever they’re in the other’s company..... inspired a little by this gifset jst in terms of the playing around underwater vibe. anyway. mayb they mostly dry off bt they end up climbing up onto the rooftop after n it’s a baking summer night anyway so it isn’t like they’ll catch a cold being damp bt they share a big fluffy towel n bottle of rum between them huddled overlooking the lights of the city. n maybe somehow it gets onto lana admitting how much she misses home n how it’s kind of weird being here especially bc she’s further from caleb. she’s never been this far from him since he was away in the army n we all kno hw tht turned out. mayb she’d go a bit quiet after saying this bt then i think she’d take his hand w their fingers laced together n she’d rest her head on his shoulder n be like. at least i’ll always have u. it’s like i took a piece of home w me. we’ve always had each other like that. then she’d perk up n lift her head n be like let’s make a deal. i’ll be ur home if u’ll be mine. ok? n make him pinky promise. i dnt think she’d quite consider the sentimentality in tht bt 😔 she nvr rly does she jst says what feels natural without attention paid to the deeper meaning tht motivated it n.... sighs. looks at u then looks away....
this is inspired by tht scene in don’t trust the b in apartment 23 where she’s like “look. that video of me getting rawed by my best friend means the world to me.” KJGFGJKSFHKGHKSFGHKFSHKGSHGK god. inevitably in lana n teddy’s prime when they were literally hooking up 24/7 in earlier college yrs they made.............. a few videos. i mean it’s jst realistic. it’s jst common sense. probably even a feature length film at one point. n i had this idea where bc teddy’s trying to get into acting etc mayb if he gets an agent his agent is like.... do u have any dirt u need to take care of? loose ends to tie up? incriminating files to delete? sex tapes? n if he was like... ya..... mayb his agent wld have asked him to delete them if he still had them on his computer or w.e i mean i kno lana wld n wouldn’t have deleted them she wld have been proud of their work of art...... bt maybe he told lana abt this just laughing abt it n the atmosphere ws lighthearted at first bc she’d find it rly funny too like ommmmggggggg i’m a skeleton in ur closet tht is so fun if u get famous i cld be blasted all over perez hilton that’s kind of sexy..... bt............... mayb she’d as a joke be like. mayb we shld watch it one last time before u delete it. kind of like a funeral service. a goodbye party. sailing out the flaming viking raft n paying our respects u know??? n they were joking bk n forth bt then she’d be like. seriously tho mayb we should? growing more accustomed to the idea actually being a genuine one even tho tht is fking. the WORST idea i have EVER heard in the world like i do NOT know how lana wld think she has the self control to do that bt in her head she’s like. teddy n i are jst best friends now... it’s fine........... we’re open w each other it’s just a bit of fun.......... n then i can imagine if he went along w this it’s like a game of chicken they’re playing w each other where they’re both like fking hell shd we do this.... dnt wna seem like I’M the one tht thinks i can’t handle it........ n it’s some back n forth like nick n jess in new girl where they’re daring each other to have the threeway w the landlord. bt then like not even.... a minute into watching it as they’re both silently holding their breath n crunching popcorn they mde for the occasion (insisting on acting like it ws just a normal movie night) lana wld literally have to be like. slams laptop shut. UMMMM i forgot.... i....... have a very important meeting......... n teddy’s just like. meeting? u don’t have a job... what are u ta-- n she’s like A MEETING A VERY IMPORTANT MEETING...... very blatantly squirming around as she slowly gets up n tries to head fr the door... n teddy’s like.... taking the excuse without much question too like... ya i have to run lines actually i jst remembered gt an audition coming up..... n they’re both like ya haha... maybe some other time.... or maybe just delete it it’s whatever.... anyway we gtg haha... bye.... ttyl...... lana wld literally hv to SPRINT out of there to go home n. deal w how flustered this made her i won’t lie. she bumps into parker n is all flushed in the face n is just like CAN’T TALK BYE n takes off sprinting again like some kind of freak. it’d b a train wreck. i jst think that’d b rly funny tho n dare i say it? it’s canon.
3 notes · View notes
Hey can you do a part two for David being a little bitch and not appreciating y/n???
& Anonymous said to dobrikburrito: Please make a part two to that little blurb about David being a bitch
a/n: apparently i don’t know the concept of a blurb and this is so big but i love it.
I woke up at 6 am to a notification on my phone. For a second my brain had an immediate response of thinking it was a text from David. Oh, it was David, but not a text.
It was a notification for his new vlog.
I sighed, no messages or calls from him throughout the night. I buried my face back in my pillow and returned to sleep.
I woke up near 10 am. No texts or calls. Leaving my phone behind, I went to take a long shower, trying to distract my mind with anything other than him. I treated myself, hydrated my hair, exfoliated my skin, did it all for me. I deserved it.
I did my hair and put on a nice outfit. I wasn’t really going anywhere or had any plans in mind, but you know what they say about feeling the worst: you gotta look your best. It does give you a little motivational upgrade.
Deciding I needed some lattes and sweets, I grabbed my keys and left my apartment. Smoothly lied to myself and forgot my phone. I could use the time away from all my expectations. After getting everything I needed from Starbucks’ drive thru, I made my way back. Curiosity got the best of me and I picked up my phone.
7 texts from David ♥
11 missed calls from David ♥
2 voice mails
My heart skips a beat. Half of me knows this routine is part of his life, it’s part of who he is and I shouldn’t be mad since I knew what I was signing up for. The other half of me also knew after posting a vlog there was a small window before it all started again. I loved him with all my heart, but I needed to let him know this was making me sad. I couldn’t put up with this for much longer.
Then Jason called me. Obviously. I didn’t pick up because I knew David would be listening.
A couple of minutes went by and Zane facetimed me. I knew David probably asked him to make sure I wasn’t dead or anything.
“Hey baby.” I smiled softly at him once I accepted his call.
“Hey mama,” Zane smiled at me widely. I could see he was at his place, lying on his couch. “How you doing?”
“I’m good, you?” I fixed my hair, trying to seem happier than I was.
“I’m good too. Are you sure you’re okay?” His tone was very giving on the fact that he was worried.
“I’ll be okay sweetie. Don’t worry about me.” I shrugged, trying hard to smile.
“Since you’re one of the smartest people I know, you probably know why I’m calling you,” Zane was always straightforward with me which was one of the reasons I loved him so much. “Just give him a call, okay? He’s worried sick and sometimes David takes a minute before he realizes he’s screwing up a good thing.”
I chuckled. “Oh, don’t I know it.” I shook my head, looking down. “I’m just taking a moment to think about everything, that’s all.”
“I understand baby. I just love you two too much to see both of you so sad.” Zane was legitimately like a big brother to me.
“Okay, I promise I’ll give him a call.” I smiled at him. “I love you Zane, never forget that.”
“I love you too baby. Call me if you need anything ok? Just say the word and we’ll either gain 5 pounds eating ice cream or get ourselves hella drunk.”
Instead of calling David, I decided to show up at his house. A call would just lead to that anyway. I let myself in, not finding him anywhere in the living room or kitchen, but quickly hearing his voice and Jason’s up in his room.
“I just don’t understand why she would talk to Zane and not me. Not even answer any of my texts or calls.” I could hear David pacing in his room. “Yesterday she wouldn’t even come home with me, acted all weird. I just don’t know what I’m doing wrong.”
“David, you know I care for you a lot.” Jason started. “But sometimes you tend to prioritize work and I see (Y/N) standing there for hours unattended. It didn’t happen one or two times and you know it.”
David sighed loudly. “But this is my life, my career.”
“And (Y/N) is your girlfriend.” Jason pointed out with a nod.
David looked at him for a few seconds, knowing he was right. “Do you think she’s gonna break up with me?” A chill of fear ran through his whole body.
“You need to get your shit together David. You need to make room for (Y/N) in your life. Compromise. She does it all the time for you. It needs to go both ways.” Jason reasoned with him and I smiled, reminding myself to give Jason a hug later. “Or you’ll end up losing her.”
David ran his hands through his face. “I can’t… I can’t lose her.”
“I don’t think that’s gonna happen…” I said, walking in his bedroom and surprising both of them.
“(Y/N)…” David said, his jaw to the floor. He quickly walked towards me and hugged me tight. “I was worried sick something might have happen to you.”
Jason shot me a knowing smile, then got up from David’s bed and walked out of the room.
“I’ll leave you two alone.” Jason said. “Also, you’re too good for him.”
David flipped him off behind my back and earned a laugh from Jason. Once he let me go, I closed the door behind us. I still hadn’t said anything else.
“Are you okay?” David asked me, looking all over me for bruises or any good excuse for ghosting him all day.
“Yeah, I’m fine…” I started saying, getting cut from him soon after.
“Then why didn’t you answer any of my texts or calls?” His tone was a little demanding, which triggered me in a bad way.
I sighed and walked into his room, immediately regretting coming back. But I did love him too much to leave him hanging for longer or to not even try to fix it.
“Feels good to wait on someone else, doesn’t it?” I sat down on his bed.
“So, it was payback from yesterday?” He now had a petty tone.
I sighed again. “No, David, it wasn’t payback. I’m not a child. I just took one moment to think about everything and how I felt.”
“You need to think our relationship?” Now he was saying like it was something surreal.
Ugh. “Yes, David. Surprising as it is, I don’t feel so great about it right now.”
That caught him off guard. “Are you breaking up with me?”
“No. I’m trying to work things out.” My voice was soft now, a little tired. “David. I feel like I’m always following you around. I’m always the one who clears the schedule, changes plans, to go wherever you wanna go. I’m always restraining myself because I know you get jealous when I talk to other guys, even if it’s just friendly. But I’m also the one who needs to watch you filming instagram models all the time. I’m your main support and I feel like I’m always waiting for you to realize I’m here.”
David was looking at me throughout all of my confession. After I finished, he sat next to me.
“I didn’t know you felt that way. You could’ve told me.” He said, staring at the floor.
“I did, though!” I closed my eyes for a second, only confirming how he barely listened to me. “I did it yesterday, the day before that. After that party with Charlie. After Kristen’s birthday party. I do it all the time. You just… don’t take it seriously, because you believe that I’ll always be around.”
Every word out of my mouth was a knife to my own heart but I knew he was hurting as well, knowing how messed up things had become. I looked down to hide my own tears.
“I know how important your work is for you. That’s why I try not to complain or demand things from you. But feeling like second option every time hurts.” I whispered it.
“You’re not… second option, (Y/N).” David looked at me, noticing the teary eye. “I love you.”
“I know you do.” I sighed and nodded. “But love has nothing to do with attention. Even right now I feel like such a bitch for asking this from you and honestly it’s such a basic aspect of a relationship.”
He went to take my hand on his, caressing it with one hand and holding it with his other.
“I don’t know what to do to make this better.” David whispered to me. “Tell me what to do.”
“You know, for once, I really wanted you to realize it by yourself without anyone else telling you.” My voice was a little harsh but I was being honest, tears start rolling from my eyes and he looks at me, his expression completely heart broken. “Maybe you need some time to figure that out, David.”
He looked up at me, fear in his eyes. I got up and started walking towards the door, David followed me before I could leave and grabbed my arm, turning me around.
“Please, don’t leave me. Please, please.” Both of his hands were now in my face and his eyes were watering. “I love you, I need you. I can’t do this without you. I’ve been the worst boyfriend to you and you deserve better, I know that. But let me be better, let me make it up to you and I promise you’ll never feel unloved again. I hate myself for doing this in the first place, but please, just… give me another chance. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time and I’m sorry I took you for granted.”
All the right words for the man you loved was making you smile mid tears. I nodded and kissed him a million times. “Please don’t hurt me again.” I said as our foreheads touched. “I’m believing your words and I love you and I really want us to work.”
He gave me one deep kiss. “I love you so much.” He kissed me again. “I’m going to show you that every single day.”
424 notes · View notes
Unleashed - Chapter Seven
Chapter Seven: Homecoming Revelations
Rated - M (for suggestive adult themes, references to some violence, and coarse language)
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.
How much time had passed since Kagome had left, he was not sure. Inuyasha had spent so much time not keeping track of time, that this new concept of days, weeks, and months was foreign. Previously, he had no use for time; otherwise, he would have allowed himself to fall into a depression that may have resulted in insanity decades ago. Now things were different. He woke up with a desire to live rather than just exist.
It all began the moment he woke from his long, dreamless slumber. He vaguely recalled being put to sleep by that priestess he was supposed to kill, but instead, he found himself disobeying Boss and getting pinned to a tree. The last thing he remembered was looking at the priestess and thinking of how pleasant she smelled, like fresh rain: clean, pure, and renewed. Now, it was a different smell that brought him back. While he was lost in the dark, the aroma of honeysuckle permeated around him, reminding him of something warm and inviting; a memory he had not experienced since childhood.
His eyes opened, and he thought his nose was playing tricks on him. Here was the face of the priestess who, in her anger, had fired the sacred arrow into his chest. She did not smell the same, but as his eyes adjusted to the light, he noticed subtle differences. The eyes of the woman before him were different. It was not just the color of her eyes, which were pools of deep blue that he had only ever seen on his mother's favorite yukata, but they were also alive with curiosity and hope.
In contrast, the priestess's eyes had appeared ringed with sadness and heavy with the burden she must bear. Inuyasha felt the woman touch his ears, and he watched as she reached her arms over his head to do so, allowing him to study her face. Momentarily she realized that he was staring at her and shrieked before falling to the ground. Some part of him wanted to jump down to her, though the concept of helping a stranger was foreign to him, but he could not move.
She called up to him, and her voice was melodic and strange. How long had he been asleep, he wondered, where was Boss? The woman stood up and climbed up to him, breaking him from his thoughts. He heard her ask about the arrow, and he glanced down at it with his eyes and back at her. He watched as she wrapped her hand around the wooden shaft, ready to pull. Instead, it disappeared, and they both fell to the ground. He landed smoothly and watched as she picked herself up off of the hard earth. He felt...rigid, but free. He heard the woman's voice again and saw her approach. Instinctually, he shuffled back and briefly wondered why he was reacting this way towards her. Her face, when he pulled away, was confusion and a trace of hurt. Why would she look that way? No one cared about him.
That look on her face is what kept him in the area after he had run away. Fear of Boss is what prompted him to run in the first place. He feared punishment and being alone...but he was alone now, and Boss was not here to punish him, so he stayed in the woods...until he saw her again. After that moment, everything changed. He didn't realize it at the time how his whole world had shifted.
When Kagome dropped into the well, he could sense that she had left. Shippo had jumped down to confirm that she was indeed gone. "She's gone!" he exclaimed as if he hadn't believed she would go. Miroku only scratched his head and muttered to himself. The trio returned to the village in silence. On their trek back, Inuyasha wondered about Kagome's home. She had spoken to him about her home several times. She made it sound peaceful and loving, much different than how things were now. His life had always been tumultuous, whereas hers was calm and predictable even. So much different...just as Kagome was different.
Inuyasha did not have much experience with women, which was an excellent way to say none at all outside of his mother and the female servants who lived on his mother's estate. The servants were all cruel, but his mother was always gentle and kind. He hadn't thought of her for so long. While he was practically a slave, he had shoved the memory of his mother deep down into the recesses of his mind until he could no longer recall how she even looked. Kagome had unlocked those memories with her patience and gentle words.
A few days had passed since Kagome had left. Inuyasha's time had been occupied with assisting Miroku with several village duties. Many of these duties included checking or helping female villagers with mundane tasks. Inuyasha didn't understand Miroku's constant need to solicit smiles and attention from the women. The Monk tried hard to inaugurate Inuyasha into his ways but had little success.
"So basically what you're saying is that you've never felt the touch of a woman?" the Monk asked, wide-eyed at the revelation. When Inuyasha did not respond, Miroku gave him a conspiratorial look, "Oh, my inexperienced friend, this we must fix."
Inuyasha did not understand what Miroku had meant, but he was soon to find out. Miroku attempted to have Inuyasha converse with some of the lovelier village maidens. Still, the women were too timid to speak to him in that fashion, him being a hanyo and all. That and Inuyasha was not comfortable talking to people any more than necessary. The villagers were not openly hostile to him, but he could sense from their standoffishness that they weren't entirely comfortable having a half-breed in their midst either.
After Inuyasha's failed attempts to speak to the more gentle sex, he became frustrated with Miroku's unabashed forwardness. Dealing with all of these new emotions was also foreign to him, and he did not know how to deal with them, so he would often brood in silence. He was tired of Miroku pushing him to do all these things that he was uncomfortable with, and he was sure the villagers did not appreciate it much either. Shippo must have sensed Inuyasha's mood one day after Inuyasha had tried and failed to follow Miroku's instructions on talking to a girl. The Kitsune, who split his time between Kaede and Miroku, jumped up to Inuyasha's shoulder, "Just tell him to stick it in his ear."
Inuyasha looked over at the Kitsune, wide-eyed at the suggestion, "It's what my papa used to say when people were getting on his nerves. I've heard people say other things, too, like, 'Go away, leave me alone, go to hell, fuck off,' stuff like that. You don't have to do anything you don't want to." Shippo nodded sagely.
Inuyasha regarded him for a moment and nodded. "Ok," he said before the Kitsune dashed off again, leaving him alone with Miroku. This notion of speaking his mind would take some getting used to, but Shippo assured him that it was perfectly reasonable to do so. He turned and watched as Miroku shamelessly flirted with one of the girls who Inuyasha had failed to speak to, pondering on Shippo's advice.
Days passed, and Inuyasha felt that he was getting the hang of this "speak his mind" bit. It took a couple of days for his patience to wear thin, but Miroku prodded a little too much. The Monk had taken it upon himself to introduce Inuyasha to the world, and his approach was a tad heavy-handed, not to mention somewhat misogynistic.
Today, Miroku had led Inuyasha over to the stream that bordered the village. Several village women and younger girls labored with laundry by the edge of the stream. Miroku smiled as if he had just come upon elusive prey. "Alright, Inuyasha, now take a look at this beauty," he gestured to one of the women closest to them, "Take a moment to appreciate her subtle beauty. The way the light hits her hair, allowing it to glisten around her kind eyes. I've seen that one eyeing you. You should go and speak to her," Miroku instructed. Inuyasha glanced at the girl in reference. He'd seen her looking at him, too, but it was not in the alluring manner Miroku presented. He knew fear when he saw it, and this girl exuded fear in abundance.
"No," Inuyasha said shortly, crossing his arms into his sleeves.
The girl peeked over at the pair, aware that she was being watched, and withdrew into herself. Her shoulders hunched over, and she began to wring out an article of clothing more than necessary.
Miroku gave Inuyasha a cross look, "What do you mean 'no'?"
"I don't wanna," Inuyasha shrugged. He studiously avoided Miroku's gaze.
"Come on, Inuyasha. Just walk over there and say hello," Miroku urged.
Inuyasha had enough. He turned and leveled his gaze at the Monk, arms still crossed, "I said no, monk. I don't have to have a reason, so, FUCK OFF!" Turning on his heel, Inuyasha growled and jumped off into the distance leaving Miroku to ponder what had just transpired. The Monk scratched his and shrugged before walking down to the water's edge.
More time had passed with Miroku avoiding Inuyasha for several days before finally overcoming his aversion. Inuyasha had sat down to a meal with Shippo one evening when Miroku arrived and joined them. "I've been wondering when Lady Kagome will return," he paused, "Or if she will return at all."
Shippo stopped from gobbling down his meal, his mouth still stuffed, "She said she would!" he exclaimed. His tiny face looked offended that Miroku would even suggest that Kagome would abandon them.
"Think about it. She has no reason to return if she has truly traveled to another time, as inconceivable as that is," Miroku explained.
Inuyasha did not look up but merely grunted before taking another bite of his meal. He had worried about the same thing. Kagome had left him to "look after things," and he intended to, but he still felt drawn to her warm presence and was disheartened that she had not yet returned.
"I cannot wait any longer," Miroku continued. "I'm afraid it is time for me to move on."
Shippo's unchewed food fell from his gaping mouth, "What do you mean?" He padded across to Miroku. "You're leaving again?"
Miroku looked solemn for a moment, withdrawing into himself for but a second before clearing his throat. "Yes, I must carry on to complete my journey."
"What is your journey exactly?" Inuyasha asked. "Since you've been here, all I've ever seen you do is chase and accost women."
Miroku chuckled, "My intentions are nothing but pure." That revelation caused Shippo to snicker. Even Inuyasha had to suppress an urge to pique an eyebrow.
"That doesn't explain what you're doing here. There are plenty of girls in the world, so protecting their integrity can't be why you're here or why you've stayed," Inuyasha said.
"Yes, I understand why you would question my quest. I have not been exactly forthcoming regarding my true intentions," Miroku said with a sigh.
Shippo nodded, "It's obvious that it has something to do with your hand." He pointed at the Monk's wrapped hand. "Plus, you're always staring at it when you think no one is looking. Do you have warts or something?"
A shocked look passed over Miroku's face, and Inuyasha did snort in amusement. "Warts?!" Miroku exclaimed.
"Yeah, it's okay if you do," Shippo assured. "My Papa always told me that humans are covered in warts. I'm surprised that I haven't seen any humans with warts until now."
"I can assure you that it is not warts," he said with a shudder as if it were beneath him to carry such a disfigurement.
"Then what is it?" Inuyasha asked out of curiosity.
"It's a curse. One that has been passed down paternally from generation to generation. If I cannot remove the curse," Miroku took a deep breath, steadying himself, "I am destined to be swallowed up by it."
Shippo had crossed back over to put more food into his mouth, "Swawowed?" he asked, his mouth full of food. He gulped, "By what?"
Miroku held his covered hand to his face and took a deep breath, but said no more, obviously lamenting over his own predicament. While it was uncharacteristic for Shippo, he did not attempt to press Miroku any further for information. Inuyasha picked at his food slowly and deliberately.
The small hearth fire in the room crackled and provided a break to the silence that permeated throughout the small dwelling. Inuyasha stared into the flames, contemplating everything. Had he really expected Kagome to come back? What was so important about her returning? He assumed that once she left, she would be gone for good, taking the Shikon Jewel with her. Now that it was gone, there was no reason for him to stay just as there was no reason for Miroku to stay.
"I suppose you could come with me," Miroku suggested.
Inuyasha pulled from his thoughts, regarded the Monk. "Nah, I'll stay."
"Hmm," was all Miroku replied.
Shippo jumped up and exclaimed proudly, "Inuyasha and I promised Kagome we would stay at the village and protect it!"
Miroku chuckled, "I think I understand." He gave a knowing look to Inuyasha. "I shall depart in the morning then. I wish you well, Inuyasha." The Monk stood up and dusted off his robes before leaving the dwelling.
Shippo rolled his eyes, "He's not gonna leave."
"And what makes you think that?" Inuyasha questioned. Shippo had been rescued by Miroku and traveled together for a time, but they were not close. No, Shippo had formed more of a bond with Kagome, but she was not here either, leaving Inuyasha as a surrogate.
"He's always blustering on about leaving, but he never does. He's waiting for Kagome to come back," Shippo answered. He crossed his arms beneath his chest, imitating Inuyasha.
Shippo had turned out to be correct because Miroku had not left the next day. Nor the day after, nor the day after that. Perhaps he indeed was waiting for Kagome to return with the Jewel, though Inuyasha was not sure why.
The people of the village continued to avoid Inuyasha. At least until the yokai came. Lesser yokai began to assail the town in increasing numbers, which was odd given that the Shikon Jewel was not there. Inuyasha dispatched each menace quickly, and the villagers began to warm up to his presence, calling him their savior. Their behavior towards him was entirely unexpected and made him uneasy. In all of the long years of his life, people had always shunned him, used him, or abused him. No one ever accepted him. It was not until he'd met Kagome that he began to let down his guard and feel like something more than a nuisance or a tool. She was the real reason that he stayed. Though, that was no secret.
It had been nearly a month since Kagome had left. Miroku was convinced that she would not return now and had begun courting a young woman in the village. Shippo had taken to following Inuyasha around, which Inuyasha found annoying. He'd found solitude to be comfortable, and Shippo found loneliness unbearable. There was no middle ground, and that was how Kaede came upon them one morning, bickering.
"Inuyasha!" she huffed, out of breath from running to find him. "Hurry! Mononoke ambushed the east side of the village."
Inuyasha jumped up, throwing Shippo off to the side, who had been pulling at his ears during an argument. "Where's Miroku?"
"I could not find the Hoshi," Kaede responded.
Inuyasha nodded and leaped into the air to cover more ground, leaving Kaede and Shippo behind.
He sailed over the small huts and houses of the village and could see a small horde of lesser yokai assaulting people by the riverside. The men from the village had poured out to hold off the assault with pitchforks, slings, and the odd bow, but their successes were few. As he landed, he could see one young woman being molested by a demon, it's forked tongue wrapped around her wrist, and it's maw open to devour her. Before he could intervene, he heard a yell. "Umi!"
Inuyasha's head swiveled towards the sound, and he saw Miroku sprinting in his direction with his staff in hand. Inuyasha looked back at the woman, and it dawned on him that this was the girl that Miroku had been courting. Shippo told him that Miroku began their courtship by asking her to bear his children, and when she did not respond by slapping him, they began to see each other. Inuyasha had never met the girl, but she was dangerously close to losing her life to the yokai. He hesitated for a moment, wondering if Miroku would thank him or resent him for intervening when it was possible that the Monk could save her. He remembered from his time with Boss how the gang would hate to be one-upped and have their pride damaged. The outcome was never right. But Miroku was not part of that world. Inuyasha finally resolved to step in and made to destroy the demon but stopped when he felt a pull at his clothing and his footing.
Inuyasha's head whipped over to see Miroku remove the charm from his covered right hand, and his eyes widened at the vortex that pulled everything in its path inside of the tiny black hole. The sound was deafening, and Inuyasha froze to see the horde of yokai sucked into that hole. Miroku's face contorted into one of anger, and he casually moved his aim to suck in every last one of the marauding demons. The demon that had its hold on the girl Umi had stopped attempting to eat her but did not release its grip. Miroku saved that demon for last and expertly positioned the vortex to pull the demon within. In seconds the demons snakelike body was pulled up off the ground and into the tunnel. However, it still had its forked tongue wrapped around Umi's wrist, and she was also pulled up. Miroku noticed this a second too late and moved to cover his hand. The deafening roar silenced, leaving Inuyasha's ears ringing, and the remaining villagers began to pick themselves up from the ground. Most had gone to their knees once Miroku's weapon had been revealed.
Miroku stared at the ground, his mouth agape. Instead of Umi, it was nothing more than the sandal from her foot. Miroku had unintentionally sucked her up into his tunnel. The Monk sunk to his knees at the realization.
Inuyasha jumped over to where Miroku sat motionlessly. His hands balled into fists at his knees, and he did not look up at Inuyasha's approach. "I killed her," he said matter of factly.
"It was an accident," Inuyasha consoled. He really could think of nothing to say. Loss was not new to him, so he could not easily empathize.
"My curse assures that I shall die alone and with no one to carry on my name," he lamented angrily.
It was at this time that Kaede hurried to the scene with Shippo at her side. "What has happened?" she asked.
"The Mononoke are destroyed," Miroku said quietly.
Inuyasha looked over at the old woman and shrugged, not quite sure what he had seen. Shippo had the sense to keep quiet but looked at Miroku worriedly.
Kaede observed the area, noting that there was no trace of yokai. She rested her gaze on Miroku, who still sat white-knuckle upon the ground. "Let us retire to my home and discuss the matter."
They walked in silence to Kaede's hut. Once they got closer, Inuyasha detected a familiar scent, causing him to run ahead of the group. The sudare was rolled up, and Inuyasha stopped in front of the small house, peering into the doorway.
Inside, Kagome stood up, still dressed in her strange garb. "Hey guys, sorry it took me so long. I had to wrap some things up and I..." she trailed off, sensing the mood. "What's going on?"
The rest of the group also stopped once they realized what had stopped Inuyasha in his tracks. Shippo bounded forward with glee and launched himself into Kagome's arms. "Kagome! You're back!"
"Yeah, I'm back. I said I would, didn't I?"
"Why are your clothes so weird?" the Kitsune asked, taking in her strange attire. "Is that what people wear in your village?"
Kagome put Shippo down and giggled half-heartedly, "I suppose it is a little strange." She had returned wearing a strange top and equally strange dark pants. The threading on both items was finely stitched and completely foreign. She looked around at the group standing before her...something had happened. She instantly gravitated to Miroku's pained expression. "Miroku?"
The Monk said nothing but walked in and knelt, looking at nothing and no one. Kagome's brow furrowed, and she looked to Kaede for answers. The old woman closed her eyes and nodded. "That is what we've come to discuss, Kagome." Kaede gestured for Inuyasha to enter her home and followed him in. Once everyone was seated, Kaede brewed a pot of soothing tea and then finally sat when the water was heated.
Kagome was having a difficult time with the silence. "Will someone please tell me what's happening? Miroku is acting as if someone died."
Miroku's eyes widened at the words, and Kagome could see a twitch in his cheek. "That's exactly what happened," he supplied.
"What? How?" Kagome asked. She looked over at Inuyasha who's eyes rested on Miroku, but not his face, his clenched fists.
His voice cracked when he spoke, "My curse...the Kazaana. It is a wind tunnel that is going to swallow me up if I do not break the curse."
"What curse is this, Hoshi?" Kaede inquired. She had risen to pass cups out to those who wanted one.
"One that has been passed down from my grandfather. He was a very powerful monk that battled against the demon Naraku for many years. This particular demon could shift-change into different forms, whether that be an unsuspecting old woman, to an innocent child. They would waylay each other with my grandfather always prevailing as the victor, but never being able to finish the bastard off before Naraku would slink off to lick at his wounds. The last time that Naraku and my grandfather came upon each other, Naraku came in the form of a beautiful young woman." Miroku took a cup of proffered tea from Kaede and took a sip. "My grandfather, ever the lady's man, was taken aback by the woman's beauty."
Shippo had sidled up to Inuyasha and whispered, "He means his grandfather was a lecher." Inuyasha absently flicked Shippo in the head, urging the Kitsune to keep quiet.
Miroku continued, "He was unable to attack the woman. And the woman, actually being Naraku, pierced grandfather's hand in his hesitance, inflicting the Kazaana curse upon him and all males within his line to bear the curse until they are eventually consumed by it."
"I still don't understand," Kagome interjected. "You said that someone died?"
"Umi…" Miroku said.
"Who's Umi?" Kagome asked.
Kaede shook her head, "Ah, child. I am sorry for your loss."
"It's my fault. I killed her," Miroku said with another break of his voice. "I didn't know her that well, but...I…"
"Did you love her?" Kagome asked. She still was not quite sure what had happened, but judging from Miroku's reaction, it impacted him significantly.
"No...but I cared for her in a small way. I had not had the opportunity to...I may never have the opportunity to…"
"How do you break the curse?" Inuyasha interrupted.
"I have to find Naraku and kill him. Only then will the curse be broken," Miroku said. "I don't know if I will make it until then. So, my only alternative is to assure that my line lives on through my heir."
"So, you've given up on looking for Naraku? Is that what you are saying?" Kagome asked.
Miroku shot her a defensive look, "I have no choice. Naraku has been dormant since my grandfather received the Kazaana. I've spent my entire life searching for him and have not even heard a rumor of him."
"Quit yer bellyaching and go find him then," Inuyasha said matter-of-factly. Everyone turned to look at Inuyasha quizzically.
Miroku looked annoyed. "You make it sound so easy. It is not your life in the balance."
"It is easy," Inuyasha emphasized the word, "Kagome is back, and she has the Shikon Jewel with her. That's supposed to draw yokai, ain't it? Well, let's use that to draw this Naraku and kill him."
AO3 - Unleashed
5 notes · View notes
Chiaroscuro: Umbra, Chapter 18
Warnings: separation anxiety, some flirting and neck nibbles
Tags: @hannibalssweaters @reclusive-cat-lady @limerami @saekkos @yournewsatanistpisshunter @angelfallenspirit @kshandra @rocket-dancer @bakedbybeelzebub @blood-ghuleh @jitterbugs927 @inferuscorvus @ptite-shit @scriptor @localmusicrocks @dragonsfire8780 @thedaddytamer
If you’d like to be tagged, let us know!
It feels like you look up and time hasn’t passed at all…but in fact nearly three months are gone, and now you are walking through the sprawling dark halls of Avatar Country’s new church, nearly complete, supervising furniture delivery for the many dorm rooms that will soon be filled with Sisters and Brothers of Sin. Special walks beside you, going over your travel plans. “Are you excited about going back to Sweden, precious?” he asks.
You smile. “Excited…and nervous. I’ve got the job itself down, except for working with other people. That has to come with experience…so, yeah, nervous.”
Special chuckles, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “You’re going to do just fine. You’re very good at putting people at ease, but being hard when you have to.”
You think back to the night of the coronation, the looks of disbelief and displeasure, the rude things those sisters had said… “I hope so. I just… I hope so.”
Special drops a kiss on top of your head. “I know so. And I am never wrong.” He smiles at your snort of a laugh. “Now, the king’s plane is taking off at midnight, you must be ready.”
You groan. “Why must we fly overnight?”
The arch-demon stares down at you. “Because your husbands and Jonas and I agree that you need to sleep, and we all know you won’t sleep if you’re here tonight.”
You blush faintly but laugh. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. Thanks, Special.”
“Anytime, my Imperator,” he replies, leaning down and kissing you deeply. You sigh into his mouth before you get back to work, making sure the placement of everything is perfect.
He stays with you, offering assistance when you need it, but mostly just watching you work, keeping one eye on the time, otherwise, he knows you’ll keep going through dinner, and everyone wants to see you before you leave with him, Aether, and Beta that night.
But the job is done in plenty of time, and Special is impressed at the way you motivate people without being harsh. It’s something that Imperator the First could never accomplish. The arch-demon smiles. This second branch…he has very high hopes for it.
“It’s amazing,” you murmur as the two of you head for the entranceway.
“Mmm, what is, precious?” Special asks, guiding you through the quiet halls with a hand on the small of your back.
“It looks so much like the main church, I still can’t believe how Jonas’s workers got everything to match so well.”
Special nods. “The only thing they didn’t put in is Papa’s rooms, since he’ll be living in the palace.”
You smile wistfully. “I almost wish they had, to be honest. Papa’s rooms…it’s where this whole crazy thing began, you know?”
“I do know. But honestly,” he says as you stop and make adjustments to some of the wall sconces, “I’m glad. You all need to have time away from work. Having your offices here is enough.”
You gaze at him. “Are you saying Papa is working too much?”
“No, I’m saying you are.”
You shrug, looking back at the sconce that stubbornly wouldn’t stay straight. “Things have to be done. Once everyone’s settled, things will calm down. And then I can take a few days off.”
He grabs your hands and gently pulls you away from the sconce. “It’s not about taking time off. It’s about taking care of yourself, precious. Sleeping, and eating, and drinking water, and taking walks… things that you haven’t been very good about lately.”
“I’m fine, Special.”
“Are you though?” He traces the dark circles under your eyes with a gentle finger. “Are you really.”
You look up at him, and your shoulders sag, the front you’ve been putting up the past two weeks crumbling away. “I’m so tired…”
“My precious girl,” Special murmurs, and pulls you in for a tight hug. “You’ve been doing so, so well for us. But you need to rest as well. Come on, there’s still a few hours before dinner. I’m going to give you a massage and then a bath, okay?”
“But I have to—”
“You have to do nothing except relax,” he says firmly.
You sigh. “OK. But I really do have to finish packing if you want me to be ready to leave at midnight.”
“We’ve been here almost three months. Do I still need to explain to you the concept of servants?” he says, smiling.
You flush. “I…I don’t like asking them to do things that I can do myself.”
Special slips your arm through his, patting your hand as you both begin walking for the front doors again. “But, my precious one, that’s what they’re paid for.”
“I know, but still…I don’t…”
Special kisses you. “I’m going to tell Jonas to send a servant up to finish your packing. No arguments.” You don’t argue, mostly because you’re trying to figure out how to get the packing done before Jonas gets involved.
Unfortunately, he doesn’t leave you alone enough to do it. A servant does indeed finish your packing while Special is giving you one of the best massages of your life, and you pout when you see your bag waiting neatly near the door.
“Special! What if they didn’t pack everything I might need?” you almost whine.
“We’re only going to be gone for a few days, I’m sure they are smart enough to figure out what one beautiful woman could need for a few days away.” He leads you toward the bathroom. “And it’s not like we can’t get anything they may have forgotten. Come on now, bathtime. Dinner is in an hour.”
You pout some more, but you let Special bathe you. The ghoul smirks as he washes your hair. “My dear, do stop pouting. I don’t have time to put your mouth to better use.” You turn crimson and slap at his chest, which just makes him laugh.
“You…you’re so…rude!” you splutter.
“That may be,” he says calmly, massaging your scalp, “but you love me anyway.” You scowl …mostly because you can’t deny it.
He washes you thoroughly, chatting happily about anything but work the entire time, and makes sure you’re dry and comfy before taking you back out to the main rooms where servants are setting up dinner tables.
“Hmmm,” Special mutters, gaze raking over your form. “Damn, Jonas said dress nice for dinner tonight, gotta change out of your sweats, precious.”
“But they’re comfy for being on a plane all night!” Now you really are whining.
“You can change back,” Special retorts. “Come on, you don’t have to go formal. One of those pretty little sundresses I like maybe?”
You cross your arms and give him the head cock that he knows means trouble. “I’m only going to be gone a few days. We don’t need to go all out.”
Special snorts. “It is the king, and you’re coming back as official Imperator II. He’s not going all out, but it’s…enough.”
You feel like stamping your feet. “I really don’t want him to make a fuss every time I breathe!”
Special tilts his head, spreads his hands out in front of him, and his long fingers almost distract you… “That is something you need to discuss with him. Although to be fair,” he pulls you to him, “becoming the official Imperator is…a huge deal, precious.”
You sigh, knowing he is right, but wanting to fight still. “It’s the last night that I can appear as just…myself, without putting on airs or acting all official. I just wanted to be comfortable.”
Special blinks, cocking his head at you. “My dear conduit, what do you think it is that we want? A carbon copy of Imperator I? No. We want you…as Imperator. No one said you had to be exactly her.”
“No, no ‘I just.’ You seem to think that we are expecting airs and attitude from you.” He cups your face, makes you look at him. “We want you. Just you. The way you have always been: kind and thoughtful and smart and sweet, with a little heat thrown in. That’s all.”
Your eyes widen just a little, and you swallow hard. “D-Don’t I…have to wear the uniform though?”
Special laughs. “What, like what the good Sister wears? Not at all. You can wear a robe and pajamas every day if you want.”
You seriously contemplate the joy of wearing jammies all day and giggle when you imagine Damiano’s reaction. Special laughs as well. “There’s my precious girl.” He kisses your nose. “Just be you. That’s all.” This time he captures your lips with his, a gentle caress. “Now…a sundress? Or maybe one of those massive dresses?”
“Mass… “ you smile. “Maxi, you goof, it’s called a maxi dress.”
“Hey, Jonas is the one who’s so good at women’s fashion, not me.”
You laugh softly and take him into the closet, eyes wide as you look around, the sight of so many beautiful outfits still overwhelming to you even after all this time. “He went way too all out in this,” you breathe, looking at all the choices.
Special chuckles. “I’m sure he would have gone even farther, but he ran out of closet space.”
“Talking about me behind my back, are we? Tsk tsk.” You whirl around to see Jonas leaning in the doorway, arms crossed, an indulgent smile on his face. “Is that any way to treat a monarch?”
You blush faintly, but huff and cross your arms. “It is when said monarch spends way too much money on my wardrobe.” But there’s a teasing note to your voice that makes him laugh, and he pushes off the door frame to walk to you.
“And now you would deny me my fun. Heartless,” he teases back.
“I don’t know, a little denial might be good for you.” He puts his hands on your hips and brings you close, and your hands go to his shoulders. “Might teach you a lesson.”
He growls just a little. “And what lesson might that be, little flower?”
You reach up and boop his nose. “Not to spend so much damn money on me when it could go to your country instead!”
Special snickers off to the side and Jonas shoots him a look, then looks back down to you. “My precious flower, you saved this country. I want to do this for you.”
“I know. But you didn’t have to.”
“I never thought I had to. I wanted to. Big difference.” He snugs you in closer, pulling a tiny “whoop” out of you, followed by a hum as you feel every inch of him against your body. “I’m going to miss you.”
You smile up at him, hands pressed to his chest. “I’ll be back before you know it. Besides, you’ll be so busy setting up the welcome home you won’t even notice I’m gone.”
“Nonsense. I’m going to pine,” he says, so seriously that you start giggling. “I will sit in my window and sigh longingly, waiting for my love to return so I can lower my dreadlocks for her to climb up.” He raises his eyebrow, trying not to laugh in the face of your giggles. “You mock my pain. What a cruel mistress you are!” He sweeps you into a dip, really making you whoop now, and he bends over, nibbling at your neck.
You laugh, trying to squirm away. Special is smiling off to the side, and he clears his throat. “As beautiful as this is, dinner is in half an hour, your majesty.”
Jonas rights you, and nods. “Yes, you’re right. Come, my precious flower, let’s get you dressed.”
The three of you argue good-naturedly over your options, though Jonas and Special begin to get a little testy as they defend their choices…until you put your hands on your hips. “Pretty soon I am going to wear these sweatpants and be done with it!” you threaten.
“No, no,” Jonas says quickly. “Either of these is fine, you pick the one you like best.”
You nod, Special biting back words about how much you remind him of Imperator just then, and you look between the dresses. One little black dress that was somehow demure and flirty at the same time, and one sundress that was white with sky blue dots on it.
“Dots it is,” you say firmly, trying to stay as informal as you can without grabbing your rattiest pjs.
Jonas smiles. “It really doesn’t matter…you are stunning even in those sweatpants.”
You throw your hands in the air. “Then why can’t I wear them?!” Jonas laughs and spins you around happily, and you try your best to stay cross with him—-it’s not working very well.
“Don’t be cross, please,” Jonas finally says as he settles you on your feet. “I can’t help it … you look divine in your dresses, I want you to show yourself off.” He nuzzles your neck. “And if we had time, I’d want to see everything you have to offer…”
You snort softly, but you can’t stay mad when he nuzzles you like that. “As if you all don’t see me naked every night.”
“You speak as if we could ever become sick of you,” he murmurs as he starts kissing your sweet spots.
You tense a little—hearing him voice your hidden fear like that makes your heart stutter. You know it’s foolish to even think it…after all, it’s been months, and no one has given you any reason to think otherwise…
He feels you tense in his arms, and he pulls back a little, searching your face. “My precious, beautiful flower…You don’t really think that, do you?”
You swallow thickly. “I…I’m afraid of it happening someday. I don’t…think that it will…but it scares me all the same.”
He studies your face a moment longer. “I promise I will never tire of you. And although I can’t speak for everyone, I am fairly certain that your loves will agree with me.”
Special nods and embraces you from behind. “The chances of you getting sick of us are far greater than us getting sick of you, precious.”
You laugh, a little wetly. “Get sick of any of you. That’s a silly thought.”
“Exactly. Now, come on, my precious. We need to go to dinner.” He kisses you, deeply, and so does Special, before they’re wrestling your clothes off.
You can’t help the shot of desire that surges through you as they undress you, making your knees tremble just a bit. “What’s wrong…” Jonas inhales. “Mmm, never mind, I already know the answer to that.” He growls and shoots Special a look. “We should wait.”
Special nods, though he gives your ass a playful swat. “I just finished bathing you, dirty girl.”
You can’t help but giggle. “Not my fault you two are so sexy,” you reply cheekily.
Jonas’s eyes are twinkling as he watches Special slip the dotted dress over your head. “She thinks we’re sexy, my demon friend,” the king says with a wink. “She’s such a flatterer.”
“She is! Us, sexy. The thoughts you come up with, precious,” Special says, exaggerating exasperation. You laugh even more, leaning against the king as the sound of your happiness fills the room.
“Mmm, I love to hear you laugh,” the king murmurs in your ear. “It’s almost as beautiful as the sounds you make when you come around my cock.”
You shudder hard, swallowing. “H-Hey, that’s not fair,” you protest as Special leans down to slip your delicate sandals on.
“All’s fair in love and sex,” the ghoul murmurs with a cheeky grin.
“You say ‘fair’, but I don’t think you really mean it,” you mumble as you straighten the dress out and take in their gazes, locked on you. “Do I…look all right?”
Jonas meets your eyes, and his face softens. “More than all right. You are my flower,” he says simply, and your heart warms with affection.
You cup his face. “And I always will be,” you whisper.
“That’s what I like to hear. Now, let’s get out there with the others, they’re waiting for you.”
You nod, taking their arms and leaving the room. Dinner is already on the tables, and there’s candles lit. Your boys all stand, and to your surprise, they salute you as well as the king.
Your blush rises up quickly. “They… why are you saluting me? Jonas,” you look up at him quickly. “Why are they saluting me? I’m just … me.”
“Because, darling girl,” Aether says, stepping up next to you, “starting tomorrow you are officially Sister Imperator II. You have a station now.”
“Oh…oh.” You shake your head. “I guess I didn’t realize…” You look around at all your loves, taken aback by their shining eyes and loving smiles. “You don’t have to salute me…it feels kind of … weird.”
Fire chuckles, arms crossed behind his head. “We figured we’d get you used to it. You’re kind of our boss now.”
“We do have to…well.” Earth smiles faintly. “We won’t do it in private. But we have to in public.”
“No, I’m afraid there can be no ‘buts’ about this,” Papa says as he swiftly approaches you. “Starting tomorrow you’ll be surrounded by sisters and brothers of sin who will all be saluting you, and they will expect to see the ghouls offering you deference.” He kisses your hand. “So…you must accustom yourself to this.”
You pout, but quickly straighten and nod. The pope smiles and steals a real kiss before guiding you to your seat, and everyone digs in, talking about the trip.
“Please tell Casey I say hi?” Water implores, and you laugh.
“Of course I will.”
Air shoots Water a questioning look. “You do realize she’s coming here, correct? You’ll get to say hello yourself in just a few days.”
“Yeah, but she’ll see her first, and I want Casey to know that I said hello right away.” Water tears into a piece of bread.
“You’re a romantic idiot,” Air teases, shaking his head.
Water throws a piece of bread at the taller ghoul, who just catches it and eats it calmly. You fight back a giggle. “Leave him alone, Air, I think it’s sweet,” you gently admonish.
“Well of course you do,” Air mumbles, “you’re just as sappily romantic as he is.”
You frown at him. “Are you complaining?”
He blows you a kiss. “Never.”
You catch it, look at it, huff, and smack it on Johannes’s cheek. The wolf promptly pretends to gag and scrub at his skin, and there’s laughter as Air flips him off.
The entire meal is full of light-hearted banter and silliness, and you find yourself laughing nearly to tears more than once.
All too soon, however, the dishes have been cleared away and your boys can’t stifle yawns anymore. You smile. “Go to bed everyone, it’s okay. I’ll be back before you know it.”
Earth immediately latches onto you, nearly tackling to you to the floor. “I’ll miss you,” he whispers, and you smile softly and stroke his hair gently.
“I’ll miss you too, baby,” you whisper back. “But just think how wonderful it will be when I get back.”
Earth grins. “We’ll go to the lake…for a picnic.”
You beam to the little ghoul. “That sounds perfect.” You kiss him softly, and you bid everyone good night, getting a kiss from each of them.
Beta is standing a little way away, and after Earth lets go of you, he moves to the clown, throwing his arms around the taller man. Beta oofs, though he holds his ghoul just as tight. “I’ll be back soon,” he says softly, in that tone of voice reserved only for you and Earth.
“I know...I...well. I’m still going to miss you,” Earth murmurs, and he looks a little teary eyed. “Try not to...ha. Don’t get into too much trouble.”
Beta laughs, running his fingers through Earth’s hair. “But that’s my middle name.” Then he kisses the smaller man, with all the love he has in his heart, and the small ghoul sighs with the sweetness of it.
Papa and Johannes step up to you, smiling softly. “We are so proud of you,” Papa murmurs, caressing your cheek with the back of his hand.
You lean into his caress, eyes closing. “I know, I feel it.” Your smile is fleeting as you look up at him. “I still don’t know about this whole going-without-you idea. It won’t be right, being there without you.”
“My goddess, my wife,” he says softly. “You will be back before you know it. This is something you must do. And we have much to still prepare here. Besides, all of tomorrow is going to be a ritual around the new church to cast protection spells. You’d be bored off your beautiful ass for that.”
You pout a little. “I could have helped.”
Papa smiles. “You’re not far enough along in your catechism for that, you know this. But your task is important, my love, getting everyone organized, presenting orientations about life in Avatar Country, answering questions…you have much responsibility these next few days.”
You frown. “When you put it like that…it’s a lot. I’m glad Aether and Special will be there.”
“You can do it, sweetness,” Johannes says, grinning. “I heard Papa Prick tell Jonas the other day--” Papa snickers over his husband’s term for his brother, “--that you have impressed him. If that’s not a vote of confidence then I don’t know what is.”
Your eyes widen, and then you grin and stand a little straighter. “I suppose so.”
Papa captures your lips in a soft kiss. “I know so.” He smiles again. “Now, do you have everything you need? All packed?”
You shoot a mock exasperated glance at Special, who bows. “I hope so. If I’m missing anything, I won’t know til I need it.”
Papa looks confused, until Special tells him of the servant who finished your packing. “Ah, I see. Well, I’m sure they did a great job, my love. You won’t need any paperwork until you get there. Imperator will give you the list of names and room assignments.”
“I just need to change into my sweatpants again,” you say on a yawn. “I want to be comfy.”
Johannes frowns. “Make sure you rest, sweetness. Don’t think we haven’t noticed you’ve been up way too late most nights.” You try to speak but he interrupts. “Don’t argue. Just take care of yourself.”
You can’t help but smile. “Yes, dad,” you say as you turn for the closet to get your pants back. He growls playfully and swats at your ass, making you squeal and laugh.
Johannes watches you go, and sighs as the door shuts. “I don’t know what I’ll do without her for two days.”
“I think we’re all going to feel lost while she’s gone,” Papa says as he strokes Johannes’s hair. “We’ll just have to keep busy.”
Johannes smirks. “Are you including the king in these busy plans, my love?”
Papa blinks, then laughs softly. “And what if I am? You have not said stop yet.” He raises an eyebrow at his husband. “Unless there is something that you’re not telling me…?”
“You already know what I think,” Johannes says with a snort. “I’m just waiting for the two of you to figure it out, and trying not to be jealous as all hell when he’s trying not to look at you like you’re goddamn dinner.”
Papa chuckles, softly, voice full of lust. “To be fair, my husband, most people look at me like that.”
Johannes snorts. “Yeah, yeah, but most people aren’t my king. I can’t punch my king.”
Papa wraps his arms around Johannes’s waist. “Would you punch your king over me? Truly? I almost want to see that.” Johannes growls. “Now, now, my wolf. You know that you have my heart, always, no matter if we bring a dozen more people into our…whatever this is.”
Johannes sighs. “That’s not the issue. With Beta it’s not an issue, because he’s like…half me. But with anyone else…it’s hard to watch. Even with my king.”
Papa looks up at the man, who’s looking away, and he turns his husband’s face to look at him. “I love you,” Papa says softly, voice full of conviction. “Even if the king is growing…fond of me. You and our goddess have my heart.”
The wolf snorts. “Don’t think I don’t see how you’ve been looking at him recently. You’re growing ‘fond’ of him too.” He pauses, then murmurs, “But I do know.”
Papa stares at him. “Do you though? Do you know it in here?” He taps Johannes’s chest. “Or are you too wrapped up in here?” He taps the wolf’s head.
Johannes watches Papa for a moment, and then his eyes soften. He cups the pope’s cheek and leans in, giving the other man one of the most tender kisses he’s ever given anyone. Then he presses his forehead to Papa’s and whispers, “I know it in both places. You’re my husband.” And if the wolf puts a little more emphasis on the ‘my’ than strictly necessary, Papa doesn’t remark on it.
They kiss again, which is how you find them. You watch their embrace, and find there’s a lump in your throat. “Awww…. don’t do that in front of me, I’m not gonna want to get on that plane!”
Papa and Johannes laugh, and Johannes pulls you in to them. “C’mere and kiss us, woman.”
You laugh and oblige, kissing them deeply, trying to convey how much you’ll miss them through your lips. With the way they’re both holding on to you, you think it works. “Don’t know what I’m gonna do without you for two days,” Johannes says again softly.
“Given what I just saw, I think Papa might help you think of a thing or two,” you tease, then pout. “In fact, I think I might end up missing out. This doesn’t seem fair…”
Papa chuckles. “We’ll be sure to welcome you home properly in a few days, my goddess. Johannes and I will think of something extra special, do not worry.” He gives you such a heat-filled look that you gulp, body flushing despite yourself.
“G-Good. A-Anyway, you need your sleep. I’ll see you both in a few days.” You kiss them swiftly one last time, then scuttle out the door with your things.
“Sweetness, wait!” you hear Johannes call as he hurries after you.
You turn, smiling as he catches up to you. “My love, if you don’t let me go, I’m not going to be able to leave, and as much as I want to stay, I really have to go.”
“I know, I know,” he says. “Just … damn it, c’mere.” He grabs you into a fierce hug.
Your heart fills with love for him, and you hug him back, hard enough his spine cracks a little. “I love you, Johannes,” you whisper.
“And I love you, my sweetness,” he whispers against your hair.
Special walks by and picks up your bag, shaking his head. “The two of you do realize that we’re coming back, right?”
Johannes flips the arch-demon off. “Fuck you, you’ll be with her the whole time.”
Special chuckles and holds his free hand up. “Easy, I know you’ll miss her. Come on, goddess. We have to get to the airport.” You kiss Johannes again, then reluctantly pull away and start down the hall. Your eyes well with tears as you look back and he’s still watching you.
“Go on, sweetness,” the wolf says. You blow him a quick kiss, and then you’re gone. He sighs and heads back to the suite, takes one look at Papa, and says, “She’s coming back. Why am I acting like such a fucking dumbass?”
“Because we love her so much,” Papa replies softly as he strips down for bed. Johannes can’t argue with that, and he too strips down. The others have all filtered out, and Jonas looks at the two awkwardly, unsure of where to go.
“You can join us, my king,” Papa says. “I promise I won’t bite…unless you want me to.”
Jonas chuckles, but he sobers quickly. “Perhaps I should leave you to yourselves.”
“Perhaps,” Papa agrees. “With our goddess gone, there’s a spot here… But suit yourself.”
Jonas hesitates, then smiles and backs up to his own bed, undressing. He is not a child anymore; he can sleep in his own bed. He turns the light off and slips under the covers, hearing soft sounds from the other bed, and missing you.
You, meanwhile, are cuddled between Special and Aether in the backseat of one of the king’s cars, headed for the airport. You’re trying not to cry but failing miserably. “It’s just a couple days,” you wail. “I shouldn’t feel this way over a couple of days!” Aether strokes your hair and croons to you.
You cry into his shoulder, and he, Special, and Beta all try to comfort you. But nothing works, and you cry yourself to sleep, leaning heavily onto Aether’s shoulders in your fitful slumber.
At the airport, Aether hands you to Beta, who carries you onto the private plane and directly into the bedroom. By the time Aether and Special get the baggage stowed away, Beta has you tucked into bed. And soon after the plane is in the air, all three of them have snuggled in with you.
Beta, worriedly, strokes your hair, your face still a little red from crying so hard. “She’s going to be okay, Beta,” Aether says kindly, rubbing his hand up and down your arm softly. “She just…”
“…misses them already,” Special finishes, and the clown snorts.
“Yeah, I got that.”
Aether frowns. “Beta, are you ok?”
“Yeah,” he answers, scowling.
“You don’t sound all right.” Aether exchanges a look with Special. “What’s wrong?” Beta shakes his head but doesn’t say anything.
Aether sighs. “We cannot help you if you don’t—”
“I miss Earth, okay?!” Beta snaps, and the two ghouls blink in surprise as the clown’s cheeks warm. “I’ve never…missed anyone like this before…”
The clown buries his face in your hair. “I’m sorry, Beta,” Aether says quietly. “I didn’t even think about that.”
“You know you could have stayed in Avatar Country,” Special says. “Aether and I could have taken care of everything.”
“No,” Beta mumbles. “I’m her bodyguard. It’s my job. I’m gonna do my job.”
Aether and Special look at each other, smiling. “You’re a good man, Beta,” Aether says softly, patting the clown’s shoulder, as he simply wraps himself around you tighter.
Special shakes his head, and motions to Aether to leave the room. “We’ll let him be alone with her. We can plan this move better out here,” Special says softly as they walk to the comfortable seats.
“He’s certainly come a long way, hasn’t he,” Aether says quietly as they settle in to their seats.
“Indeed,” Special agrees. “And quite honestly, I’m glad that she has his entire focus, and that he takes protecting her so seriously.”
Aether nods. “When he first was…well, born, I thought he’d cause nothing but trouble. But he’s been…an asset, actually. I thank Satan for him.”
Back in the bedroom, Beta hums to you soothingly, stroking his fingers through your hair. Now that you are alone together, he allows himself a moment of softness.
You snuggle in to him, and mutter sleepily, “Don’t leave me, Beta.”
“I won’t,” he replies. “I’m staying right here with you.”
You smile, and his heart warms. He can’t help but smile himself, even though he does miss his Earth terribly. He chuckles faintly. His Earth. How far he’s come.
8 notes · View notes
The Joker x Reader- “The Bionic Woman”
The Joker’s son has a new obsession: his father’s much younger girlfriend. What started as an innocent crush is quickly escalating to a full blown fixation, especially since Alexis decided that if he can’t have Y/N, The King of Gotham shouldn’t either.
“Y/N…” Alexis gently taps your shoulder, smiling as soon as you open your eyes, “… breakfast is here.”
Even if you hear the shower and know he’s already up, you still turn towards The Joker’s side of the bed, stretching.
“Mooorning,” the sleepy Y/N hums. “I’ll jump in the shower too and we’ll be downstairs shortly, alright? You can start without us.”
“I’ll wait,” the 20 year old informs, watching his father’s girlfriend pulling down on her cute tank top before getting out of bed. The matching shorts makes her long legs stand out and he just can’t help it:
“Hey, when are you going to take a shower with me?”
The disapproving stare you give while heading into the bathroom makes the young man lift his hands up in surrender.
“Sorry! Sorry, bad joke. Ummm… but should I still hope though?”
You keep walking, uttering the perfect answer for his insistence:
“I wouldn’t bet any money on it!” you scoff and he laughs, the fake grin disappearing as the door is slammed.
“I got shampoo in my eyes,” J growls because Y/N’s words made him aware she’s there also. “What are you betting on?” he keeps on rinsing all the bubbles clouding his vision.
“Nothing really,” you take off your outfit in a hurry and slide the glass panel, sneaking in the shower by the King of Gotham. “Alexis came to say breakfast is here.”
“Oh goody, I’m kind of hungry,” he wickedly smirks when your fingers massage his hair until there is no more shampoo. “Did he run his mouth again?” The Joker asks and your silence is confirming the suspicion. “Are you going to trade me in for the younger model?” he slaps your butt to get a reaction and you snicker, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“Naaaah, I like my old one,” the playful answer pleases him.
“Do ya’?” J glares at your boobs and you continue:
“What am I supposed to do with a kid? I need a real man, babe.”
“You sure do,” Y/N is slowly pushed against the back wall of the shower since he wants to add a bit of extra fun to his morning.
“The food will get cold,” you glide your hands down his wet body completely not giving a damn at this point though: feeling his soft skin and toned muscles makes you be up to whatever he desires.
“A quickie doesn’t take that long,” The Joker winks and leans over for a kiss, dodging your puckered lips in the next second. “Awww, not fast enough Pumpkin,” he teases and as revenge you grope him, knowing it will prompt retaliation. “Wanna play that game, hm?” J’s raspy voice gives you goosebumps as he lowers himself on his knees, satisfied when you let out a scream in anticipation. “Good lord, woman; I didn’t even do anything yet,” he gently sinks his teeth in your inner left thigh, purring louder when you squeal.
“I’m not a kid”, Alexis mumbles on the other side of the door because he’s been listening to the conversation going on in the shower. He softly punches the wood frame and Y/N’s increased moaning triggers him to finally exit the master bedroom at the mansion The Joker owns outside Gotham.
At least Alexis realizes he has to be careful after badly messing up three weeks ago: you are on speaking terms again and that shouldn’t be taken lightly.
It was Friday and J had to stay overnight at one of his clubs to wrap up a profitable deal with a new business partner. You were tired and decided to return to the mansion where out of boredom you had a few whiskey shots before going to sleep since there was nobody else around besides security patrolling the perimeter. Let’s just say they are not the most cheerful bunch…
At some point in the night, you sensed movement next to you and cuddled up to the body, assuming it was The Joker.
“I…I think I’m drunk babe,” your slurry speech made you giggle. “Wanna have fun?” and your hand went inside the boxers, immediately taken out by their owner. “That’s mean,” you admonished when you got squeezed in a tight embrace and felt your face kissed all over. “Such a tease,” you yawned and hugged the stubborn boyfriend. “And apparently a gentleman since you don’t want to take advantage of your tipsy girl,” the conclusion made the other party huff.
It was dark in the room and you wished you could have seen J’s face and how worked up he was by the closeness; you could tell anyway.
“Suffer in silence then,” you pouted and snuggled to his chest, definitely not suspicious about the episode because you had alcohol on board.
Next morning was a fiasco.
Something being abruptly swept from your arms made you open your eyes and saw The Joker dragging Alexis from under the purple sheets.
“What are you doing in my bed, hm?!”
J didn’t look happy and Alexis regained his balance, alarmed he got busted and stood there by the nightstand, intensely gazing at the carpet.
“What’s happening?” you got on your elbow, slightly dizzy from the hangover.
“Yeah, Alexis; what’s happening?” The Joker sneered and those fierce blue eyes made the young man confess:
“I…I was making sure she’s OK after she had a few drinks. I was nearby just in case…” the weird reason was stipulated and you interrupted.
“Babe, you didn’t sleep here?!” Y/N frowned as she asked her boyfriend.
“No, I was at the club all night; just got back!” The Joker informed and you darted out of bed, ignoring the splitting headache.
“How dare you?!” the slap landed on Alexis’s cheek before you finished the question. “I thought you were your father!”
J’s son didn’t argue because he wasn’t given a chance; the detail that stood out in his mind was the fact that his parent didn’t suspect Y/N of anything, not for a moment.
It was a certainty that The Clown Prince of Crime was a jealous individual. Probably an understatement, yet he didn’t hesitate to suspect his own flesh and blood rather than his woman. Which made Alexis nervous he might get in serious trouble.
“Listen here, you asshole!” you shouted. “I won’t tolerate this crap, do you understand?!”
“I swear I only wanted to make sure you don’t need anything after you had a few drinks…”
“And how do you know I had a few drinks?! I thought I was home alone! Unless you creeped around the house watching me and that’s not cool! And why didn’t you say a word once you came in the bedroom?!”
Damn, you caught on to that! He didn’t think you would have since you were inebriated…
“I’m really sorry… I didn’t mean to be disrespectful…”
The Joker was annoyed but your tirade wasn’t over: based on previous behavior and evidence from past actions, it was clear he had a crush on you. So Y/N had to explain the best way she could:
“I love your father! HIM, not YOU! Frankly Alexis, I have a hard time even liking you these days!”
The 20 year old held in his breath, hurt by the bitter news: he kept on hoping you’ll switch your affection and give up on The Joker, yet his dream wasn’t becoming a reality. Not anytime soon. Maybe you required time to see he was a better, safer option?
The King of Gotham pretended not to be affected by your revelation; why would you mention something trivial as love anyway? It wasn’t part of the plan. The two of you only got together to aggravate Harvey Dent: J can’t stand your dad and you get a kick out of creating trouble. Your rebellion against the former politician doesn’t come out of hate; it randomly happens when he tries to be overprotective and you fight back.
A year and a half ago fighting back meant a date with The Joker that turned into a little bit more under the pretext of irritating Two Face. The truth is J looks great for being 47: he seems younger, kind of ageless due to his unconventional appearance after the Ace Chemicals incident; he’s intelligent, has a dope sense of fashion and to quote your own wisdom “the only one in town that can satisfy a woman.”
Yes, the 30 year old Y/N Dent could have chosen another boyfriend, but she actually stopped seeing other guys since she dated J. And for some strange motive, he stopped seeing other girls on the side too, all under the excuse of antagonizing The Coin Flipper (The Joker’s favorite nickname for your dad).
The supposedly pretend relationship progressed towards something else to the point of him going ballistic if anyone indicated anything about the age difference. Your favorite memory is when J lost it while you were at the hideout on Glisson Avenue. Y/N prepared to accompany The Joker for a gathering involving money laundering and got in the car first, when the unthinkable was implied:
“Oh, is your daughter coming also?” Max sarcastically inquired, believing it was hilarious to bring it up. New York’s gang third in rank doubted his stand-up comedy skills as soon as J’s grave voice snapped:
Max couldn’t fix the transgression and apologizing would have done nothing, especially since he got a bullet in his thick skull that halted any sounds before they came out.
“Anybody else that shares the same ideas?!” he addressed the crew and Frost replied for all of them:
“Get rid of the body!” J barked and got a kiss the second he was next to you in the back of the car.
“You didn’t have to do that; I really don’t care about a complete jerk’s opinion,” you whispered and J grouchily snarled.
“I do! I have a son; never had a daughter and I don’t want rumors about me sleeping around in my youth! Reputation is everything!” the wacky clarification made you smile.
You rested your head on his shoulder, wondering why you both went through so much trouble just to upset Harvey Dent.
20 minutes went by and the couple still didn’t show up for breakfast. Alexis is rushing back upstairs to remind you and The Joker the food arrived; he’s straining to remain calm after you brushed him off again. It’s frustrating that Y/N doesn’t pay attention to his charms and fancies his father instead of the obvious, more convenient solution.
The door to the master bedroom is cracked and Alexis peeks inside: you are trapped under The Joker on your tummy while he keeps nipping and biting his way down your back.
“You know what would make that old gizzard lose his marbles?” he sucks on your soft skin, leaving a lovely hickey on your right hip.
“Please don’t call my dad a gizzard,” Y/N snorts, amused at the moniker nevertheless.
Your boyfriend ignores the complaint and his over the top proposal comes without any warning:
“If we get married, he would have a heart attack and die. That sounds amazing, doesn’t it?”
You roll on your back, not certain if you heard correctly.
“And if we had a baby, we can basically buy his casket. I mean, that would kill him for sure!” the delighted green haired pest rambles on. “Silver coffin goes best with his skin tone, we could preorder tomorrow. ... … … … Why are you so quiet?”
“Are you… are you asking me to marry you?!...”
“Evidently. Of course I have to underline it’s for exasperating that old fart. Nothing else.”
“Of course…” you sniffle and The Joker buries his face in your neck, waiting.
He feels a faint movement and sighs:
“Are you crying?”
“Liar,” he lifts his head up to look at your teary eyes. “You’re reading too much into this; the sole purpose is to annoy Harvey.”
Alexis is listening at the door, his fists so tight the nails are cutting the flesh. The young man’s ears are ringing and he can’t stand watching his father making out with Y/N, definitely about to have sex again.
And that’s when the diabolical intention takes shape in his brain: if he can’t have Y/N, The Joker shouldn’t either.
1 hour later
J is entering the kitchen, aiming for the coffee first. As he pours the hot liquid in a cup, his son nonchalantly interrogates:
“Skipping breakfast; she’s going to visit Dent and give him some important information,” the elusive description infuriates Alexis because his father is not saying anything about proposing to his girlfriend.
“Why do you always have to win?” he resentfully mutters and J suddenly pays attention to his offspring.
“Do you think it’s cool parading around with something that should be mine?!” Alexis yells, shaking from the outrage he can’t control. “I won’t let you have her!! You can’t have her!! She’s mine!!”
The Joker slams the cup on the counter, angrily directing his suspicion towards an envious son:
“What the fuck did you do?!”
You barely backed out of the parking lot and drove a few feet when your cell phone rings.
“Hi babe,” you slide the screen, steadily driving on the paved alley.
“Get out of the car!!!” The Joker shrieks and you defend the decision you both agreed upon minutes earlier:
“I’ll return shorty, ok? I’ll tell my dad and…”
“Alexis rigged the car! There’s a bomb inside, it’ll explode soon!! GET OUT!!!”
“Oh my God!” you slam the breaks and flee the vehicle in a hurry, panicked.
As The Joker is running out of the mansion followed by a few henchmen, the loud explosion throws Y/N to the ground; debris fly all over the place and a few hit the collapsed body.
The small group reaches you and they are not sure if you’re still alive: there’s a lot of smoke, rubble and ashes around the unconscious woman.
“Hey Y/N, wake up!” J kneels by your head, attempting to wipe the soot on your cheeks.
“Help me with this!” Frost commands the others and the hood is lifted off your feet, everyone present freezing at the bloody mess concealed under the heavy piece of metal: your left leg is severed from below the knee, bone shards sticking out of the punctured skin.
“I need a doctor!” The Joker shouts and Richard is already dialing the number on his phone. “Somebody call Dent!” he orders and cups your face, worried about the serious condition you’re in. “Y/N, can you hear me?”
No answer and no movement.
The crew doesn’t even pay attention to Alexis, too absorbed wrapping Jonny’s jacket around the amputated leg. He silently watches everything, shocked to assess the aftermath of his actions.
“I didn’t mean to do this…” he pulls on his hair, terrified at the frightening view. “I swear I didn’t mean to…”
“GET HIM OUT OF MY SIGHT!” The Joker finally notices the young man’s presence, returning to his task of trying to wake you up.
Two goons drag him away against his will while he keeps bawling and shouting:
“Dad, I didn’t mean to! Please, I didn’t mean to!!! Daaad!!!!”
5 days afterwards
“I’m here to see Y/N,” J straightens his shoulder in front of Harvey.
“I already told you she’s not doing well enough to receive visitors,” Two Face grinds his teeth and the men standing behind are making sure to block the entrance.
The fact is J wasn’t stopped from coming into the property, but he was denied access to see you for the past two days since you were brought to your father’s villa.
“I want to see my girlfriend!” The Joker reiterates and his own team is prepared to intervene if the boss decides to fight his way in.
“You have such a nerve showing up here again!” Dent brings up what’s been eating him inside and lashes out: “Your son crippled my daughter! Or was it you and blamed another in order to cover your tracks?!”
“I had nothing to do with it!” J defends himself and his threatening demeanor alerts Frost his employer is about to snap. “Alexis doesn’t live with me anymore; he’s on the other side of town, constantly under surveillance. Understand?! So get the hell out of my way!”
“Don’t you have any respect for the state she’s in?!” your parent changes tune. ”Y/N needs to rest!”
The Joker exhales and glances at the second floor where he knows your room is, electing to force his luck.
“Fine, I’ll be back tomorrow! Got it?” his finger goes under Harvey’s nose, then turns around and walks away in front of his goons. “Hold my coat,” J takes off the purple garment and shoves it in Frost’s hands, speeding towards the building.
“What the hell are you doing?!” Harvey screams although he guessed The Clown’s intention: J is climbing the decorative ladder full of roses leading to your bedroom’s balcony and in a few moments he’s on the terrace, stumbling on the long curtains as he steps inside.
The room is converted into a medical ward, a bunch of supplies neatly organized on extra shelves needed for your special care. The Joker takes a sit on the side of the bed, watching the pale Y/N peacefully sleeping. The IV dripping pain medication and a mild sedative into your bloodstream makes a faint beeping sound each time 2 milligrams of liquid is released from the intravenous bag.
The thin blanket you’re covered with reveals your curves, making it obvious more than half of your left leg is gone.
The Joker pecks your forehead, hoping you’ll wake up before your father will barge in and kick him out.
“Sleepy head,” he takes the hand that’s not hooked to IV in his, gently massaging your fingers. “You have a visitor…” he smirks as soon as your eyes are narrowly opened.
“J…?” you try to concentrate, yet it’s almost impossible to verbalize your thoughts. “You … where…” the incoherence halts the sentence. “ Where were…you?”
“I was at the private clinic,” he justifies his absence. “Then Harvey brought you here; the damned Coin Flipper was a total dick and didn’t let me see you.”
“What did you just call me?!” Dent huffs because the compliment received as he opens the door to your room doesn’t strike his fancy. He wants to yank The Joker away but seeing his daughter starting to cry halts his movement and harsh words he’s about to spill out.
“I…I lost my… my leg…” you slowly blink and attempt to wipe your tears, not having too much coordination due to all the strong medications you’re taking.
J bends over and kisses you, willing to compromise for once.
“It’s alright, Pumpkin. We’ll get you another one, ok?”
You nod a yes and The King of Gotham shifts his head, gazing at his adversary.
Harvey stretches his facial scars in a vexed grimace, temporarily agreeing with The Joker for his daughter’s sake.
After 4 months
“Ummm, I think I’m ready,” you nervously pull down on your short dress, emerging from the walk-in closet. It feels awkward because this is the first time going out after the incident; you wanted to cancel but J insisted you’re overdue for a date.
“There she is,” your boyfriend snickers and gestures for you to sit in his lap. The titanium prosthetic custom made for you lights up certain pressure points with each move you make, yet the unique design doesn’t necessarily mean a boost in confidence.
“Can we just order some sushi and spend the night home?” you beg and The Joker abruptly declines the suggestion:
“Nope, I already made reservations at our favorite restaurant and then we’ll go to one of my clubs.”
He digs in his suit’s pocket and takes out a small box, urging you to open it:
“For you to use,” he winks and you gulp, opening the extravagant container that reveals… fancy business cards engraved with words that make you laugh:
-- Bionic Woman
-- The Joker’s Fiancée
-- Future Mother Of His Baby
“Lemme clarify,” he points out at the first line. “Bionic Woman because you could literally pass as a superhero with superpowers with this amazing new leg of yours.”
You keep giggling and he continues: “The second one is pretty self-explanatory and the third… we have to work on.”
The happy look on your face gradually dies out.
“You know what the doctors told me,” you sadly smile. “After the complications from my… accident, there’s less than a 15% chance for me to get pregnant.”
“I can work with whatever percentage!” J boasts, not a fan of your mood switch. “I don’t want to brag, I’m a modest person,” he dramatically flares his arms, ”but I’m good at what I do, even if I’ll probably have to get into Pilates or something to up my game; but I bet you 10 million dollars I can make it happen! Unless you’re a chicken and don’t have the guts to bet.”
“Deal,” you hesitantly accept the offer, aware of J’s strategy.
“Oh, almost forgot,” he reaches the coffee table for another present wrapped up next to the laptop. “This is for us.”
You pull apart the shiny paper and burst out laughing again seeing the book presented as a gift: “Miller’s Funeral Home Casket Catalogue”.
“We have to make a decision for the old gizzard’s coffin because he will die for sure when we’ll announce our plans to get married.”
“Please don’t call my dad a gizzard,” you frown. “He’s only 8 years older than you.”
“Like I said: a goddamned old gizzard,” The Joker passes his fingers through his hair, slapping your side so you can get up. “Now that you have business cards to share and a good catalogue with stellar options, I think we should go eat. I’m starving,” he follows you towards the elevator at The Penthouse, fascinated with the prosthetic that is actually a work of art. You are able to wear your stilettos also and J pinches your butt, aroused.
“You know what your best superpower is?”
“No,” you grab his arm to make sure you’re not going to trip on the carpet.
“Annoying your dad! I mean, with our combined efforts, we can at least hope for a stroke before we even give him the final blow with the marriage news.”
You snicker at The Joker’s perfect scheme, wondering why you both go through so much trouble just to upset Harvey Dent.
Also read: MASTERLIST
You can also follow me on Tumblr and Wattpad under the same blog name: DiYunho.
119 notes · View notes
who you are | a taehyung fic
fluff | angst (ends with fluff ok!)
pairing: taehyung x reader
tw: reader is going through a lot so it focuses more on describing on what she’s going through
The digital clock stares back at you while you remain stagnant in your position. The room is filled with darkness with only the kitchen light from outside as the only source of brightness. You lay on your bed staring blankly on the wall in front of you as your thoughts start to swallow you whole. Your demons are back, and you fight back with lifeless eyes and a hopeless sigh. Just when will this stop? When will you breathe? These demons that come out from the depths of your soul from time to time to damage your whole existence and purpose, slowly seeping the life out of your body.
Emotions have left your body. Tears no longer fall to be shed, and not even a weak tilt of the lip, or a subtle glint in your eyes shakes your body off the state of emptiness. And this has happened too many times to the point that it’s tiring. God, it’s so tiring. It’s tiring to fight with your demons when these demons only come from your own self. It’s tiring to try and believe knowing that the only opponent of this battle is yourself.
It’s hard to feel happy for a second knowing what comes next. It’s hard to hope that everything will be okay when the same thing happens all over again like a cycle that never ends. It’s hard to be yourself. It’s so hard. But what’s harder is seeing the people around you look at you in endless worry, orbs filled with confusion and restlessness, especially if you see it in Taehyung’s eyes.
God, it’s hard. It’s hard to see him watch you as you lay down and stare into the darkness. It’s hard to hear the sighs he breathes whenever you don’t mutter a single word. It’s hard to see his face changing, falling, as your eyes that once beamed, lost its light. It’s hard to disappoint him because of your failure to be the lover that you should be. It’s hard to disappoint him because of your failure to ask him how his day was. It’s hard to disappoint him because of your failure to give them a sense of warmth. It’s hard to disappoint him because of you fail to give him a peck on the lips or a greeting of a hug whenever they come home. It’s hard to disappoint a him because of who your are and who you fail to be.
It’s been weeks, days, hours, minutes since you last talked to Taehyung, or even acknowledged his presence. He would always come home around late evening ‘til midnight and you would still be awake, but it would feel like he’s all alone in this apartment for two. He would stare at your body laying on the bed with your back faced to him, and whisper sad hymns of worry that you can’t see. Taehyung never saw you cry on days like this, but he is absolutely sure that you cry to yourself alone. All that Taehyung wants is to see your beautiful eyes shine once again, but he can’t seem to do anything but give you time.
You never saw Taehyung cry because of how he gets abandoned. But you can hear him. You can hear his silent screams as he desperately try to save you from drowning. You can feel his helplessness with a glint of motivation as he holds you tight at night and kisses the back of your neck. You can hear his thoughts and troubles that wouldn’t appear if it wasn’t for you. You can hear him, feel him.
And God does it make you guilty.
Taehyung comes home to an apartment made for two but he highly doubts it from the silence that the walls encloses him into. Not even a single light is on and that how he knew, that is how he knew that you were not present within these walls. Instead, a note placed on top of the kitchen counter was the only evidence of you presence.
I’m sorry love, for being such a failure. I’m sorry for everything that I fail to be. I have always fought and now I’m tired of fighting. It’s like letting it drown me and swallow me whole without resisting. I’m sorry if I can’t make you breakfast or dinner when I know you’re always starving. I’m sorry if I can’t play with your hair ‘til you fall asleep. I’m sorry if I can’t even welcome you with my warmth with a promise of a good night’s sleep and a peck on the lips with whispers of comfort and love. I’m sorry. I’m so, so, sorry.
I’m sorry for not telling you anything. I’m sorry for not uttering a single word cause it feels like my throat is closing up on me and the darkness is strong enough to cover even the light of my voice.
All I wanted was to ask how your day went but it seems like my lips are frozen and my voice is hidden. But please, all I wanted to know was how your day went, but I’m sorry if I can’t do just that.
I love you. God, so much.
A knock on the door of your own apartment was heard as you were in the middle of crying your eyes out. You slowly walked to the door while wiping any remnants of tears on your face as if it helped. You opened the door and was greeted with a glimpse of Taehyung’s face before you were smashed into his chest through a warm embrace. You couldn’t help yourself so your tears started falling again, making a mess on Taehyung’s hoodie.
“Who said I wouldn’t be with you even if they swallow you whole?” He whispered to your ear as he hugged you tighter.
“Who said I was asking for an apology?”
“Who said that I don’t love you enough to love you even when you think you can’t be loved?”
No words were said as a reply because all that Taehyung said made you cry even harder. Taehyung held your shoulders and kept you at a short distance where your noses touched and your eyes are staring into each other’s infinity.
“Do you know why people drown? It’s because they panic and they forget to breathe. If you could just breathe, your body would stay afloat and you won’t drown anymore. See Y/N, I am willing to drown with you. And I will help you breathe to prove to you that you can escape from that darkness trapping you.”
“I love you too much to leave you when you fail to be who you are.”
note: this is an old one and i wasn’t able to polish it well ;(( but anyway hello!! im back after a long ass time of uni swallowing me whole. im trying to get back to writing so i MIGHT start posting a lot more. it has been a long time since i have written anything that’s not an essay so please bear with me. anyway, i hope you enjoyed reading this! give it some love if you did. thank you, lovelies. ‘til next time.
55 notes · View notes
Talk You Out of It- Kevin Hayes
warnings: smuttttt, cursing
a/n: no editing because im tired and losing motivation. inspired by this post which just absolutely melted me. this obviously got out of control it was supposed to be like a blurb but i have ZERO self control also im hormonal im sorry
“Why are you here?”
“Well that’s rude as fuck” I say with a frown before pushing past him to get inside. He turns but doesn’t move as I flop on the couch.
“Maybe I have someone over” he counters, clearly annoyed. I sit straight up, a weird mix of emotions churning in my stomach that I ignore and refuse to analyze.
“Seriously? I’ll go”
He relents then, shutting the door with a sigh.
“I knew you were lying” I say with satisfaction and lay back down on the couch. He sits at my feet, lifting them out of the way as he gets comfy and then letting them fall back in his lap. One big hand wraps loosely around a foot. I ignore it.
“I wasn’t lying” he mumbles, his head tipped back against the cushion. I can just make out that his eyes are closed beneath the shadow of his ever present Boston hat. I lean over and reach for the remote, my feet going hard into his stomach. “Oof… am I in your way?”
I grin at him and sink back into the couch, remote in hand.
“Never ever Kev” I’m already turning back to the tv but a trace of smile pulls at his mouth, his hand briefly tightens on my foot. He leans over the arm of the couch, sits back up with a blanket in hand. He shakes it over both of us and my skin goes shivery with happiness. I ignore that too.
We both fall asleep half an episode into Fixer Upper, color still dancing across the dark room from the tv. I don’t wake up until the wee hours of the morning, my phone buzzing incessantly in my pocket.
“Sorry doll, did I wake you?” Adam’s voice is loud and has me scrambling to sit up.
“Yeah, but it’s okay. What’s up?”
“I just drove by your place and I didn’t see your car so I got worried.”
I glance over at Kevin, who is still sleeping. He’s half crumbled over, an arm draped over my legs, hand still wrapped around my foot.
“Oh yeah I’m fine. I stopped by Kevin’s and passed out.”
“Let me guess, HGTV?”
“Well tell the other love your of life I said hi, I’ll talk to you later.”
“Okay bye” I mumble, not entirely sure why I can’t say it back. I set the phone on the floor, try to sink back into the warmth that had crawled over me since I first walked through Kevin’s door. But it’s gone, an unwelcome tension in its place. I try for about an hour to fall back to sleep but give up when I see the clock turn over to 4am. Kevin shifts slightly when I crawl off the couch, his eyes fluttering open for a second.
“Where you goin?” He asks, his voice groggy.
“Adam called” I say before leaning in to kiss his cheek. He turns his head slightly and I catch the corner of his mouth. I pull back in surprise to see a slightly panicked look on his face.
“Sorry” he says desperately. I just kiss his cheek again.
“S’ok. Love you Kev. Text me when you get back from the west coast.”
He nods as he snuggles back down on the couch, his hat askew. My stomach twists and I let myself out, the freezing wind snapping me out of the weird mood I’m in and back to reality.
I don’t talk to him until the road trip after the west coast trip. I’d be offended but something about that last visit felt different so I try to welcome the space it gives us. But I really start to miss him after a big argument with Adam about nothing.
Me: u up?
Kevin: yea out w the boys
A few minutes later my phones buzzes again.
Kevin: u ok?
I blink back tears and take a deep slow breath.
Me: ya jus miss u
Kevin: I’ll b home Friday. Come over?
Me: okay gn kev
Adam doesn’t call but I don’t start to worry about that until it’s noon on Friday. I’m standing in front of my bedroom mirror wrapped in a towel, examining the multiple tiny cuts on my legs from my old dull razor. It hits me then that I haven’t shaved while getting ready for a date with Adam in ages. It’s with a slight edge of panic that I grab my phone, start to text him.
Me: are we okay?
Adam ❤️: babe yes. Just needed breathing room. Dinner tonight?
Adam ❤️: or… takeout ;)
I think inexplicably of Kevin then shove him from my mind.
Me: I haven’t gotten dressed up for ages
Adam ❤️: then let’s go out. I’ll swing by at 7.
When he arrives, I’m more dolled up than I’ve been in weeks. My face is expertly painted, hair perfectly coiffed and curled.
“Wow” Adam says when I open the door before he can knock. My stomach falls with disappointment when I see his worn out jeans.
“Mmm” he nods fervently, wraps an arm around my waist tightly to pull me in for a quick kiss. I relax into him and let go of the disappointment, willing myself to enjoy his presence again.
“Where we going?” I ask once we’re in his car. He’s pulling into traffic but he glances at me with a smile.
“Take a wild guess”
“Ummmm somewhere in the city”
“That narrows it down. it’s in Time Square.”
“Bubba Gump” I say only half serious, but he grins and nods very pleased with himself.
Everything is easy again with him. So easy that I’m a little concerned. We’re walking a thin line between easy and indifferent. He flings his arm over me as we leave the restaurant.
“You comin’ over?”
“Will you be mad if I just go home?”
“You want company?”
I shake my head and he shrugs.
“That’s fine babe, we can hang out tomorrow.”
I give him a small smile and his arm squeezes tighter for moment. The knot in my stomach gets bigger.
After he drops me off, I watch from the window until I can’t see his taillights. I’ve been avoiding my phone all evening, scared to discover whether or not Kevin texted me. I don’t know which is worse. Holding my breath, I turn it on to see if there’s any notifications.
I have 2 voicemails and 3 texts, all from Kevin. I listen to the voicemails first; the first one he sounds slightly annoyed and asks where I’m at. In the second he sounds a little worried.
“Just wanted to make sure you’re okay… text me or call me when you can”
Then I read his texts.
Kevin: u Comin over?
Kevin: or what
Kevin: are u okay?
Instead of texting him back, I rip the dress off, pull on some leggings a sweatshirt that is technically still his, then get in the car. I yank my hair out of its updo as I’m driving, pretending I don’t understand why my hands are so shaky.
I know I deserve it when I hear him on the other side of the door and he makes me wait. He pulls open the door to level me with a look that makes me feel an inch tall. He’s shirtless, sweats hanging low on his hips. My heart stutters; I tell myself it’s relief that he opened the door. I’m twisting my hands and chewing on my lip.
“you could have been dead and I’d have no idea”
he finally says. He wears his heart on his sleeve, unapologetically holding my gaze as his voice wavers for a breath of a moment.
“I’m sorry” I whisper, tears spilling from my eyes. He groans and leans his head against the hand that’s braced on the doorway.
“You can’t cry, how am I supposed to be mad if you’re crying?”
“I know, I’m sorry” I gulp and wipe my face. But he’s gazing at me, his expression soft. It starts the waterworks again. He sighs again before stepping in close and wrapping his arms around me. He holds me while I cry against his chest, gently maneuvering us into the house.
We stand in the entry, he’s got one hand on the back of my head and he’s murmuring quietly in an attempt to soothe me. It’s working.
As the tears fade I start to notice how firm he is, the feel of his chest against my cheek, the warmth of his back under my fingers.
“Sorry” I say again, pulling away. He cups my face in his hands, studies me intently. His eyes are warm, his face so achingly familiar.
“You wanna come sit down?” He asks.
I nudge him in the direction of the living room and follow him.
He sits on the edge like he always does, pulls the recliner out to put his feet up. I curl up in the seat next to him, making sure to put a few inches between us.
“So what happened?”
“I got in an argument with Adam that night i texted you… and didn’t hear from him until today.”
“So… are you guys okay?” He’s watching me a guarded expression, as though he’s gauging my reaction. I nod and for a second his face goes blank.
“But I didn’t wanna cancel and I missed you and it just felt weird and I was panicking.”
His hand comes down lightly on mine, completely engulfing it.
“You don’t ever need to panic about me” his tone is light but his words are quite serious. I look up at him in surprise, my heart hitting the floor, pounding loudly in my ears when I see the look on his face. He takes a deep breath.
“You have to break up with Adam because we have to start dating.” I feel my face get hot and I stare at him. “You were made for me.”
“Kevin- what- don’t even-” his cheeks are flushed but there’s a blazing look I’ve never seen.
“Wait- please- and… I was made for you. We were made to be together.”
My heart is banging against my ribs, I’m almost positive he would be able to hear it if I couldn’t see the pulse in his neck going crazy that tells me his heart is beating out of his chest too.
“we can do this 30 years from now when I’ve been married a few times and you’ve been married a couple times… or we can start now and end up 60 years from now sitting on a porch in rocking chairs, talking about how good an adventure it was.”
I’m staring hard at him, lips pressed together tightly so I don’t start crying again.
“I have to go… just- I’m- just gonna- Adam.” I say and race for the door. I can’t look at his face as I leave, because I can’t explain. I don’t have time and if I start I don’t think I’ll stop and I need this to be over now.
He doesn’t try to follow me, i can see him from the corner of my eye as I pull the door shut behind me, hunched forward with his head in his hands.
I shake the whole way to Adams, pounding too loud and hard at his door.
He opens it in a panic.
“I don’t love you anymore” the words don’t sound like me but they feel like me. He just looks at me in confusion. “Adam. I don’t love you anymore and I’m sorry but we’re over. Like right now.”
“Can we talk about this?”
“I can’t- he’s waiting-“
“Yeah” I’m breathing hard, waiting impatiently for him to dismiss me. He nods, breathing deep.
“I have to go. I’m sorry.”
“Okay” he says again. I turn away from him, not thinking for a moment that I need to look back.
I start to doubt myself on the drive back to Kevin’s. I’m praying he understood what I meant when I said I had to see Adam. I’m praying he recognizes that he knows me enough not to doubt me. I’m praying as I run through his front door again.
He’s waiting for me. He smiles when he sees me, his hat sitting backwards on his head. Everything slows down as I come to a stop in front of him. He’s standing in front of me, looking like everything I ever wanted. He’s so familiar but right now from right here, so different. I’m drinking him in; how he towers over me, how big he is compared to me, how warm his blue eyes get when they meet mine.
“That was a good speech” I say softly. He ducks his head, a pleased but shy grin on his face. He steps closer.
“Yeah… I’ve had a lot of time to practice it”
“I’m glad you did”
His hands go to my hips and he pulls me in close like he has so many times. This time the gap between us disappears completely. This time his hands rest at the small of my back pressing me close. This time my hands curl around his neck, this time I get to touch him without holding back.
I think my heart might come out of my chest, I can’t tear my gaze away as his face gets closer and closer.
“We doing this?” He mumbles, so close I can feel his warm breath on my skin.
“Yes. Yes, Kevin. Please.”
The tiny smile drops from his face, his eyes flicker to mine and they’re dark. So dark I can see my reflection and I brace myself for what’s coming. He kisses me then, softly like I might break. He takes his time, exploring my face and my lips with his. Every tiny movement leaves a trail of goosebumps until I start to ache for him. He kisses me properly then, tasting like every cliche, like wildfire and whiskey. Heat surges across my skin. I knock his hat off as I desperately do everything I can to get closer. He stumbles back, tearing away to fall back into the couch- dragging me with him.
He hauls me into his lap, gets his mouth on my neck. It’s all heat and fire and desire.
“say my name again” he says. The desperation in his voice has me rolling my hips into his.
He swears roughly. Another wave of heat crashes over me. He pulls at my sweatshirt and I help him get it off, revealing nothing but a dark blue bralette underneath. His hands stop and then tighten on my hips before he’s mouthing at me over the bra. My skin and everything inside tightens.
“You’re so fucking beautiful” he pushes the bra aside. He scrapes his teeth over my nipple, smiling as I gasp and arch into him. My hands are trembling, gripping hard at the muscles that ripple under taut skin. My chest is covered in little dark marks, a few tiny bruises blooming dark over the sensitive skin.
Heat has crawled up my spine and around my lungs, forcing me to draw in big shaky breaths as he slips a large hand down the front of my leggings. I think I’m going to be self conscious about the softness of my belly but all thoughts are forced from my mind as his hand gets lower and lower.
“Hey hey I got you babe” he murmurs, locking my lips with his as he works 2 fingers into me. His mouth is gentle as he slowly starts to pump his fingers in and out. The heat is pooling fast, pressure building and I’m frantically grinding against him, too intent on chasing the edge to be embarrassed until I’m falling apart and he’s fingering me through it.
“Shit” I say weakly, leaning heavily against him. He laughs softly into a kiss, hands skimming over my hips to rest just under my breasts.
“You should get naked” I say into his mouth. I feel him grin.
“Same goes for you”
“Yeah that’s not gonna be a problem.”
I wiggle off his lap, laughing when he groans and closes his eyes.
“C’mon” i grab his hands and pull him up. He immediately wraps his arms around me, leans down for a searing kiss.
“You know I love you?”
I nod. My heart feels like it’s too big for my chest and I want to tell him I love him too but I don’t, afraid that it will sound ingenuine. Instead I push up on tiptoes and kiss him again, trying to put all of the emotions bubbling in my chest into it. He must get it because he smiles softly and presses a few kisses to my cheek and forehead. Then he takes my hand and leads me into his bedroom.
310 notes · View notes