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interstitties101 · 4 months

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Ok. Dr who The Giggle thoughts.

Things I did not like (there are a lot of them tbh but I feel like they’re p valid)

Avengers tower. Be so ffr y’all. Enough. That bothered me So Much actually cuz enough with the Whoniverse shit. The whole point of dr who is to not bandwagon and this is aggressive bandwagoning.

The ending being Neil Patrick Harris missing a catch. Like ik it’s silly bc the toymaker is silly and all that but like. Very anticlimactic.

Bi-generation. Again. Be so ffr. There are SO many problems that would cause. Ripples in time and all that. And also it just doesn’t work with the show. The whole point of the dr is that there can only be one of them - the metacrisis was crazy bc it went against all precedent but still the dr was HUMAN. The dr splitting into two versions of themselves seems like a catastrophic event for spacetime by the logic of the show but ig limits like that don’t matter anymore?? I’m really frustrated with writers trying to push the limits of the show/the character by creating totally bonkers things that end up cheapening the premise of the show. The dr is insanely powerful, yes, but they also DIE. They change. They have limits. The whole point of a tragic hero is that they CANNOT remain the same and yet they ALWAYS remain the same because they are stuck in the narrative. I enjoy the idea of the dr finally getting a break but I feel like there were other ways of doing that. Or at LEAST explain that 14 is now human or has only one lifespan or something like that as an emergency way for really-fucking-old time lords to shed some of their trauma through bi-generation without causing ripples in time. I think maybe that’s what RTD was going for? But it wasn’t explained at all and giving 14 their own tardis was crazy. Cuz now they’ve just. Brought back 10 bc they liked him, no other reason. And I LOVE David Tennant. But not like this - not as fan service that ends up scratching the integrity of the show (not that the integrity isn’t constantly being scratched but whatever). Also - part of the reason the metacrisis was so tragic was because the dr could never grow old with Rose Tyler!!!!!! Only the metacrisis dr could. It was SO tragic that 10 never got to experience that. So they should’ve made it clear that 14 was human or limited in some way so they could grow old with Donna and experience growing old with someone they love finally. That would’ve properly conveyed the beauty I think (I hope) they were going for.

Treating the show as if there are no limits takes the weight out of everything. The always-upping-the-stakes trap.

Ik I just said this but the dr should’ve regenerated INTO Ncuti Gatwa, not just bc of the aforementioned OP-ness and logiclessness of the character rn but bc Ncuti DESERVED his own thing and to be the dr fully. I don’t like that he had to share his regeneration with David Tennant. It also separated Ncuti’s doctor and dt’s doctor so they seem like different people, not the same character played by different people, and I think that’s sad. One of the special things about regeneration is that you have an image of the former dr as you discover the new one and it’s bittersweet because the old one is gone but that person is STILL the new one. And that’s very special. You carry bits of each doctor with you. That effect is somewhat lost here.

The doctor would not go mad being in one place for a human lifetime cuz he already did that many times over. Those instances were major plot points actually. Remember a town called Christmas? Trenzalore? TEN would go mad because of his personality and the fact that he was always running from his problems but the dr is a different person now. 14 is not 10. But whatever I guess.

Just bad pacing of the episode bc they were trying to cram so much stuff in (like star beast). The best ep in the specials trio was wild blue yonder for exactly this reason.

The emotional convos w Donna and the dr should’ve been longer. She was his like. Primary outlet in terms of emotional vulnerability, and he was her biggest outlet for her full bravery and intellect and potential. The quieter moments when they rely more on silence and just acting and less on swirling plot devices are what makes the characters and their dynamic really shine and I wish they’d had more of that for the finale.

I did not understand why the toymaker was limited in the way he was. If you’re an elemental entity that can play with atoms like play dough then why are you constrained to only ever play games??? Why is there only ever winners and losers???

Justice for Martha Fucking Jones. Goddamn they CONTINUE to do her so dirty. Not even a mention. Damn.

Goddamnit RTD you can write BRILLIANT normal dr who episodes but you are doing WAY too much with the big ones. Lean off the meta stuff. Ground the show back into reality (or at least some semblance of logic cuz who are we kidding here. It’s dr who). Bigger is not always better and people don’t get sick of smaller but more emotionally intense plots.

Maybe it was the pacing, maybe it was the fact that we didn’t get to see any complex emotion from 14 about retiring (in a sense), maybe it was the lack of explanation/consequences about the bi-generation, or maybe it was just the ludicrousness of bi-generation in itself, but the ending did not feel as cathartic like it was supposed to. You can’t create emotional complexity out of complex plot devices. Take a simpler thing and do more with it please (hence the success of wild blue yonder). I feel like there could’ve been a different way to handle the ending. Idk exactly how (I have some ideas brewing) but it felt… incomplete. Or just immature/rushed.

If bro is gonna retire or whatever tf, don’t leave him with a tardis??? It defeats the point???

Things I liked

NCUTI GATWA!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!! The energy he’s bringing is AMAZING and I’m so excited to see him explore the emotional depth of this character. Hats off.

BAGAHHAHAHHAHAHA THE DOCTOR IS BLACK AND GAY!!!!!!!! SUCK IT!!!!!!!!!!! HES ALREADY FUCKING KILLING IT!!!!!!!

15 kissing his teeth made me SO happy. I SEE you.

I always love seeing David Tennant on screen regardless of anything else. Tbh.

14 getting a good hug from someone who literally fully understands. Even if it is themselves. What a fucking weight off.

The Toymaker’s lipsync!!!! SLAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Need I say more.

Having another former companion on the show :)

I really do love the idea of the doctor getting a break and hopefully shedding some of their trauma. They deserve it so much. But I’m sad again bc I feel like they didn’t have to bring dt back for that. I thought 10’s face coming back was something to do with the timelines fracturing (like they said in the comic relief thing!!) and the toymaker was related to that, and so in repairing the timelines they’d reset proper regeneration or whatever it is. (Note to self: see, that would’ve made so much more sense. The dr and Donna could’ve gotten their closure and 15 would promise to visit or smth and make random references in the next season to stopping by to say hi to Donna and catch up. Or like “you won’t BELIEVE what Donna just told me”. That’s the new reality I’m sticking with in my head. Anyway.) Like, the temporariness/transientness of 10’s face is what made it a treat! It wasn’t meant to last forever. So I loved the idea of dt’s face coming back as a form of releasing trauma and processing or whatever it was, but… the longevity didn’t fit. Sorry :(

Edit: also the dr was gay for himself. Lmao >:3 valid

#this is very rare that I’m so upset with an episode #but maybe it’s a sign of how much I care abt the show and the characters and all that #bc I care SO MUCH about dr who #and I have SO MUCH love for so much of it #so when something abt the show bothers me #it REALLY bothers me #no hate intended just genuine heartfelt feedback #and all of this is my own opinion obvs no one has to agree #but anyway #dw #dr who #doctor who #the giggle #sigh #ugh there were so many scenes/shots throughout these specials that were so amazing #it sucks to have big plot points overshadow so much of the beauty #vnwyorkqbfkwprjfh

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1-of-those-things · 3 years

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Fic Writer Review

Tagged by the lovely @picnokinesis (This is great. I love this!)

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

40 (But 3 are published anonymously. Don’t worry about why.)

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

313,378 (Good Lord)

3. How many fandoms have you written for?

Just Doctor Who. And just since 2020. The fandom bug got me!

4. Top 5 fics by kudos?

Biological Specificity (239) — The gateway drug to Doctor/Donna (and Interspecies Compatibility as a series)

It Has Been 0 Days Since the Last Incident (237) — This one probably gets a boost because it’s got Tentoo/Rose in the tags, but it’s really Doctor/Donna like always. Sorry bout the cat-fishing. Sometimes you just wanna write Ten, Donna, Tentoo and Rose all traveling around the Universe together!

The Best of Times (Amnesiac Remix) (236) — Just a classic fix-it where a bunch of aliens follow a mind-wiped Donna around. Bog-standard, really.

Acclimatization (234) — The second in the Interspecies Compatibility Series, or as I like to think of it, the beginning of the descent into Doctor/Donna madness

Survival Without Recovery (192) and Lazarus Taxon (192)— The official ending of the Interspecies Compatibility Series and an optional epilogue. Always impressed how many people make it all the way through that series. So much love for this fandom!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

Oh yeah I respond to ALL of my comments. If I miss one I’ll go back later and apologize lol. I’m so genuinely impressed that anyone other than me likes my writing— anyone who goes through the trouble to let me know they liked it gets all the love from me.

6. A fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I can’t help it, I like all of my fics to have at least a hopeful ending XD. But (It Breaks You Down) A Little Bit More Each Time probably involves the most angst overall.

7. Do you write crossovers?

Nah, I can barely read them.

8. Ever received hate on a fic?

Nope! If my fics are ruining people’s days they’re successfully keeping it to themselves lol

9. Do you write smut?

OH, YES! More than I mean to, if I’m honest. (When did THAT happen?)

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know!

11. Ever had a fic translated?

Nope, I’d imagine it’d be a nightmare considering how many colloquialisms I just throw around.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic?

I’ve collabed with the brilliant @fritzmetzger and @denzikken on three fics (One of which is coming out this week!)

I might've also accidentally co-written a fic with @theoreticalabsurdity @echo84 @krebkrebkreb and @picnokinesis that I think is on schedule for next week. (My part is done anyway!)

13. All time fav ship?

SHOCKINGLY it’s Doctor/Donna. I just love their dynamic so much! Even when I multiship it just ends up poly so I can get my Doctor/Donna fix.

14. WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

OK all of my WIP’s live in secret shame files on my computer because the pressure of having a WIP out in the world might literally kill me. But within that… I was thinking of doing a follow-up to The Volatile Nature of Binary Stars with more Doctor/Donna/Master vibes. Considering I might be the only person on the planet who would enjoy that though... it keeps falling to the end of my very long list of random inspirations.

15. Writing strengths?

I seem to be good at humor. So that’s something! I also like to slide genuine emotion in, but make it sNeAkY so it hits with maximum impact. That seems to go over well, based on the number of reviews I get with phrases like “gut punch” XD. Also every time someone compliments me on my characterizations I definitely get that ’swallowed a hamster’ experience.

16. Writing weaknesses?

Endings! I’m so bad at endings, fam. I love setting up a whole elaborate setting and then I just kind of get too into it and forget I was supposed to be going somewhere or building to something. I just want to keep going! So I have to keep track of all my loose threads and make sure I’m actually doing something with them lol. (This is why most of my fics cap out around the 30K mark max. Keeping track of plot after that is just a bridge too far.)

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

I usually just end up doing it in English or explaining my way around it instead of trying to type out another language. Though in my case they’re mainly alien languages that I’d have to make up. And that just seems like A Lot.

18. First fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who, baby! I’ve literally only been in this game since 2020. Lockdown GOT me.

19. What’s your fav fic you’ve written so far?

This is hard because I become emotionally attached to all my fic monsters, but my favorite monster is… Oh, damn it’s a tie. I can’t decide between The Noble Neverwere and The Volatile Nature of Binary Stars.

The Volatile Nature of Binary Stars was fun for me because it has Angry!Donna AND the Master. And I just kind of want there to be more Doctor/Donna/Master dynamics out in the world. Especially when Donna’s (justifiably!) pissed at the Doctor for abandoning her.

The Noble Neverwere gets a special place in my heart as a fic that I actually plotted out and painstakingly put together. (If Donna seems a little OOC at first that’s part of the plot, not because I lost my damn mind. Though that second option is definitely a risk.)

But yeah, really I love all my fics a little too much. I’m in the camp of “I wrote this for me, but you can read it too,” and I’m always so happy that so many people take me up on that XD

20. Tag!

This was great fun! I definitely recommend it. I'm going to tag a handful of writers (not including the ones who were literally just tagged with me): @nostalgia-tblr @raywritesthings @lilsum4 @veraynes-blog @colorofmymindposts and anyone else who wants to do it!

#fic writer review #tag game

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sammysreelreviews · 4 years

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Counting Down My Top 10 Animated Films Of The Last Decade

Welcome to the beginning of the movie decade lists! Before I start if you wanna know the exact time the next list will be out follow my instagram here! Ok so there were some movies that I left out of this list but loved so I’m gonna let y’all know the runner ups cause I’m just so fucking generous. They are The Boss Baby, Kung Fu Panda 2, Klaus, and Rise of the Guardians. I could’ve easily thrown them on the list but these decade lists are stressing me the fuck out and they’re time consuming! Also, there will be some Pixar movies missing and I DON’T wanna hear any annoying criticisms! This is MY list! ANYWHO here’s my list and I hope you love it as much as I loved watching these films over the last ten years. Enjoy! ***SLIGHT SPOILERS?***

10. Trolls (2016)

Ok ok ok, hear me THE FUCK OUT. Trolls is fucking funny!!! Even I thought the movie was going to be dumb as all hell but by the end my eyes were watering? The music in Trolls makes the movie and there are so many jokes that continuously make me laugh. Ugh I fucking love Trolls cause it always makes me happy so don’t troll me for putting it on my list!

9. Toy Story 3 (2010)

Is it crazy that the third installment in this series is the best? This movie is not only hilarious but like fucking traumatic!? When they all almost died in that incinerator!? And when Andy (John Morris) gave up Woody (Tom Hanks)!?! WHAT THE FUCK! If you can get through Toy Story 3 without crying I’m just letting you know that you’re a fucking demon.

8. The Lego Movie (2014)

Everything IS awesome in this animated film. Honestly people thought this was going to be dumb but I’m glad they were proven wrong cause I was very excited to see this movie. I saw this in college high (lol throwback to when I smoked weed) with my friend Genna (hi BFF) and it was our first friendship outing! Not only do I love this movie but I love the memories I have from it. Also it’s just hysterical and it’s something you can watch over and over again. Kind of pissed the Academy completely snubbed this.

7. Your Name (2016)

I watched this movie during the past two weeks and my god it truly deserves all the hype it gets. The tale of a boy and a girl body swapping is not only adorable but heartbreaking as hell. This is the first anime film not directed Hayao Miyazaki to earn more than $100 million in Japan! How insane is that?! What I love about Your Name is it really makes you think about all the missed connections you could’ve had. Now that I’m writing about it I really want to watch it again. Go watch it... like now!

6. Wreck it Ralph (2012)

To be honest I only got around to watching this movie a few weeks ago and I’m so happy I did! First of all the animation is just breathtaking you never wanna take your eyes off of it. The tale of Ralph (John C. Reilly) trying to be a good guy and befriending a glitch by the name Vanellope (Sarah Silverman) is not only funny but so heartwarming I was crying at the end. The sequel, Ralph Breaks the Internet, is not as good plot wise but is still tons of fun and left me wanting a third.

5. Coco (2017)

When I saw Coco I literally cried so hard it was embarrassing. At first I was skeptical because sometimes people hype up Pixar movies and then I don’t end up liking them (Frozen, Inside Out, Big Hero 6) so I decided to take the leap and watch Coco and I’m so glad I did. The colors in the movie are so vibrant and I love the atmosphere it creates even though they’re in the land of the dead. On top of that there’s an amazing familial story that would reduce the strongest of men to tears. Ugh, I genuinely love this movie so much and cry every damn time and it also gave us a great Pixar villain.

4. Into the Spider-Verse (2018)

I know it’s number four on my personal list but in reality it’s the best animated film made in the past decade. The animation alone just reels you in and I really wish I saw it in theaters. Miles Morales (Shameik Moore) has become my favorite Spider-Man and I can not wait for a sequel. Before I forget, did anyone else see that twist coming!? I didn’t!

3. The How to Train Your Dragon Franchise (2010-2019)

Ok there was no way in actual hell that I could just pick one of these 3 films like that would break me! The story of how Hiccup (Jay Bruchel) and Toothless became the best of friends and changed peoples minds about dragons is one near and dear to my sappy heart. I honestly think Toothless is the cutest animated animal that has ever been fucking created like how could you not fall in love with him!? When I saw Hidden World in theaters I was sobbing harder than the actual children that were there. I’m so glad that I gave these movies a chance and I’ll be so mad if they don’t get the Oscar they so rightfully deserve in 2020.

2. Tangled (2010)

Rapunzel (Mandy Moore) finally got the update she deserved when Disney debuted their new style of animation with Tangled. Tangled had a budget of $260 million dollars making it the highest budget of an animated film ever. You’re probably wondering why it cost so much money but it’s literally because they needed new technology to create Rapunzel’s hair! Rapunzel is a naive princess but she’s independent and always asking questions which makes her so great. She has the greatest animal companion of all the Disney princesses and Flynn Ryder (Zachary Levi) is not your ordinary Disney prince. Mother Gothel (Donna Murphy) is quite the underrated villain and Mother Knows Best is one of the best Disney villain songs. Tangled is just overall a fantastic film and I wish it got as much praise and buzz as Frozen did.

1. Zootopia (2016)

Zoo. Motherfucking. Topia. One of the best achievements in cinematic history. If you think I’m joking, I’m not. The minute I saw Zootopia I was absolutely obsessed which is funny cause I really don’t like animals. Disney found a way to not only show how systematic racism works but gave us laughs, tears, and a killer mystery to solve! The one scene that never fails to make me laugh is when they’re doing the talent show in the beginning and the cat dances with the jukebox like how can you not just holler!? Zootopia is an example of a perfect animated film and that’s why it’s number fucking one.

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makku-ruko · 4 years

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Background scenes from various arcs

Lie lie lie

Akumu akumu akumu akumu aa Namida nagasu dake uso ga tamaru

Ruru ruru ruru ruru-

Ikita ashiato wa koukai no katachi

Ruru ruru ruru rara-

Kowashite, ah-

Rairairai rairairai rairairai rai-

Tsuita uso tsuita uso zenbu zenbu CHARA ni shite

Rairairai rairairai rarara ra-

Omoide wo omoide wo zenbu zenbu keshisate

Rairairai rairairai rairairai rai

Tsuita uso tsuita uso zenbu zenbu ZERO ni shite

Rairairai rairairai rarara ra-

Omoide wo omoide wo zenbu zenbu tokashikitte CHARA RIRA RIRA RU-

Ah-

Saigo saigo kyou ga saigo guruguru ruru ruru

Moushi mekara moushi mekara souki meruto sugasuga shii kara

Kowashite ah-

Owari ni shitekure ah-

Rairairai rairairai rairiarai rai-

Kiesate kiesate zenbu zenbu owaraseyou

Rairairai rairairai rarara ra-

Nigeran nai nigeran nai donna donna bashodate

Rairairai rairairai rairairai rai-

Tsuita uso tsuita uso zenbu zenbu ZERO ni shite

Rairairai rairairai rarara ra-

Rarara rarara rarara rarara

Rairairai rairairai rairairai rai-

Rarara rarara zenbu zenbu owaraseyou

Rairairai rairairai rarara ra-

Rarara rarara donna donna omoide mo

Rairairai rairairai rairairai rai-

Rarara rarara zenbu zenbu ZERO ni shite

Rairairai rairairai rarara ra-

Rarara rarara rarara ra-

((This is a recurring theme song for Liar. It makes sense when his mental state begins to deteriorate.))

—————

Liar: //In the forest, looking up at the leaves.//

Mahogany: ...//also there. Picking some herbs. He looks behind.//....

Liar:...! //Short stare.//

Mahogany:...//Opens arms.//

Liar: //Immediate hug.//

Mahogany: //Strokes his hair.// it’s okay..

Liar: //cling//....do you...blame me for leaving?

Mahogany: Never.

Liar: Is it....my fault..? Could I really have done more..? Did I give up?

Mahogany: It isn’t. And most likely....if you weren’t plagued by so many other things....you did give up..but I understand why..

Liar: mm...I ....want to stay cursed...until the end...

Mahogany: //tighter hug.// I know why but...I can’t allow it... even if it means you’ll have to suffer with your internal problems...but I just can’t risk losing you..

Liar: Guess I’m just being selfish...

Mahogany: You have your reasons, Tsuki..somehow. One day. You’ll stop struggling...and I’ll be right there waiting to see your true smile... stay...if not for the others, stay for us.

Liar: I always did...

Mahogany: We’ll figure it out one way or another. Just...don’t listen to the people who say they know you...We know you. You can trust that. We’ll never blame you for something that wasn’t your fault. We know your story...and we’re your support...if you felt you couldn’t talk to me about anything before, you can...

Liar: You go through...enough already...I don’t want t—

Mahogany: I’m not burying my little brother because he felt like no one understood or no one would listen. I’m here. No matter what, I am. And I’ll always be...you aren’t alone...

Liar: //tighter cling. Tears up.//...mm...

Mahogany: I love you.

Liar: //sniff//...I love you too...

((This took place after Liar returned from being kidnapped by Xekiel.))

————

Xekiel: //Descends behind Liar.// Hey.

Liar: AAA—!!! ...d...DONT DO THAT Ò0Ó!

Xekiel: //Chuckle. Pat pat.//

Liar: //jingle jingle.// •^•?

Xekiel:...//Smoll blush. Ruffles hair.// Why are you so cute to me....I don’t get it..

Liar:...are you hitting on me dude? 0^0

Xekiel:.....maybe...

Liar:..//stands at attention.// So..? What’s up..?

Xekiel: //Scratches back of his head. Mumbles.// If....if that thing with demon dude and Mikhail doesn’t work out...just...I’m here....I know how much it...plagues you..

Liar:...I’m not falling for you again.

Xekiel: ...Thought so...//Smile.//..You close up really easily...but...//Caresses cheek.// Even so....didn’t stop me..

Liar: •^•....(//////)....can’t. Don’t do that.

Xekiel: //Cups face// you’re precious to me...so I only want you to be happy... //Releases.//

Liar: >\\\\\< how tf do I attract attention aaaaaaa!...hhhhhh...I mean...idk what’s gonna happen. I’ve chosen Mikhail but still love Oni. He’s reciprocating more now I guess to test and tease me...but I think it’ll end with Mikhail. I don’t wanna let him go..

Xekiel: I know...But the offer is there. I’m not necessarily going to back off though.

Liar: w-what’s that supposed to mean??? Ò0ó

Xekiel: Nothing plushie.

Liar: p...plushie..?

Xekiel: Yes. Plushie. Deal with it.

Liar: S-shut up edgelord!

Xekiel: //Grin. Pat pat. Thoughtful expression.// Alright...

((After the kidnapped saga, Liar and Xekiel became friends...but Xekiel ending up falling for Liar during his captivity.))

———

Omo: ...//staring. The dark aura still repels him.//....Tsu...ki?

Liar:..//He’s hugging his knees. Seemingly not feeling anything.// mm?

Omo:..are you oke?

Liar:...I guess...I should be shouldn’t I..?

Omo:....imma get Maho! ò0ó //runs off.//

Liar: //He stares at the sheets. Thoughts merely floating in and out of his head. His eyes devoid of life, somewhat temporary. Nothing major. Just dull.//

————

Liar’s arc progression:

-Villainous Joker (comic relief)

-anti-hero (Mikhail added)

-Lovestruck (double realisation)

-suffering sanity

-grief

-Cursed darkness (kidnapped saga)

-Last chance for good= empty/acceptance

-Chosen Darkness (final resolve)

-Questioned existence. (Need for power. Under the Goddess’ light)

———

Mahogany: //enters the room.// Tsuki...

Liar: //same place//...mm?

Mahogany:..I heard what you did..//sits by him.// And...I want to say that it’s an incredible thing to do for somebody...but what about you...?

Liar: ....I feel nothing.

Mahogany: Are you sad? Grieving? Heart broken?

Liar: No. I finally got rid of him...so I don’t want to see him anymore. Not like it’d matter now. She’s back. She can take fucking care of him.

Mahogany: So...you’re mad.

Liar: //wry chuckle.// hahah, I don’t even know. I feel like....why the fuck would I do something like that for somebody else? What’s the point of trying to be that good??? What’s the point in trying to give someone the happiness that you never got???

Mahogany: Do you...miss him?

Liar: I just...I don’t want it. To think about those feelings again. To get close to somebody again and to CARE that much. I...I don’t deserve Mikhail and I sure as hell need to forget Oni...I just...wish it was back in the beginning...when I was the problem child that bullied everyone. I’m not a good person. That was it...my last chance to decide whether or not I want to be a prick or not...this internal struggle....//croaky voice.// I’m tired bro.....I’m just so tired....of not feeling like I fit into my skin anymore. I had a dynamic. I never opened up....now I have. And I can’t go back. What do I do??? //looks at him, teary-eyed.// I can’t run anymore! I can’t ask someone to erase the memories. So what? Am I supposed to just deal with it??? I don’t even know how to feel!

Mahogany: Tsuki—

Liar: Heh...I’ve always been drawn to darkness and power. It makes me happy. It makes me feel like myself....this...this shit about being concerned and putting myself in harm’s way for people??? Not doing that again.

Mahogany: But what about Mik—

Liar: Stop fucking asking me about Mikhail! You think I don’t feel guilty enough that he’s aware of how hard I’m taking trying to get over loving somebody that wasn’t him??? That’s why I brought her back. To sever ties. And Mikhail....this final choice...when I’m finally where I’m supposed to be...that’s the last chance to prove whether he really will love me through whatever..

Mahogany:....

Liar: I’m going to change Maho. I’m done feeling discomfort and being obligated to be a better person — fuck that. Maybe in ten years but certainly not now. You can be disappointed in me afterwards..

Mahogany:....//hugs him tightly.// I just....want you to be happy...//sniff.//

Liar: //tighter hug.//....same here...you suffer too much as it is...let me protect you this time...

Mahogany: by doing what...?

Liar: Taking care of myself...I won’t kill anybody but I won’t leave them unscathed either...I envy Cyan and how he can switch....I want that...

Mahogany: Tsuki...

Liar: I’m not okay Maho...so why should I pretend to be? I’m a natural villain. My internal turmoil being kept in only makes me unhappy...I just...want to be me again..

Mahogany:...All I know is the inner you...it’s that’s the best part about you...please don’t change it..

Liar: it’s remaining under lock and key, don’t worry.

Mahogany:...you’re loved Tsuki...never forget that...

Liar:...//softens. Buried face in shoulder.// mm.....

Mahogany: if only the others could see...

Liar: All they’d do is make fun or ask questions...I still don’t trust them...to be careful with it...I wish I could though...show them... or at least let it out for longer..this constant guarding business is so tiring...I want to be soft and devoid of anything....emotionless...

Mahogany: Soon Tsuki...soon...you’ll get a break...

Liar:....mm...

((This took place after Liar resurrected Oni’s wife, shortly after returning from being kidnapped.))

#my ocs #my ocs stuff #MAGIC SCHOOL

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beccaland · 6 years

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Fandom Tag Meme

I was tagged by the wonderful @tardisly, and then I wrote my answers to several of these on a lunch break, but ran out of time, so I saved it as a draft and only just discovered that I never finished it! Same thing happened to a bit of dinner I had to reheat in the microwave the other day, because I got distracted reading an article while I was waiting. I have really embraced the absentminded professor stereotype lately. ANYWAY.

1. Your current OTP(s)/OT3(s)/OTX(s):

Shipping’s not my main fandom thing, but I’m definitely a Doctor/River shipper. I know it’s flawed and cheesy, but it just works for me. River and the Doctor are mad enough, and alike enough, and different enough for each other, and their weird timey-wimey relationship suits them perfectly. They feel balanced as a couple.

2. A pairing you initially didn’t consider but someone changed your mind (bonus points: who was that person).

I mean, Twelve/Clara sort of? I still really see them as a BroTP and don’t ship them myself, but I can at least see where the romantic shippers are coming from.

Also Five/Nyssa or Eight/Nyssa. Again, I don’t actually ship them in the sense of wanting stories where they’re a couple, but after listening to some of Nyssa’s BFAs and talking with @whovianhermit about people who’d actually make a good romantic partnership with the Doctor (as opposed to being exciting, fun, or adorable, but not necessarily healthy), I really think Nyssa is one of the few people in the universe who’d work. Except I can’t really see her giving up her own lifesaving work, or wanting to make a life in the TARDIS. So it’s definitely going to be a LDR, but really--what long-term relationship with the Doctor could ever not be a LDR?

3. A pairing you used to love, but it all fell apart for you.

LOL I feel like @tardisly and I are answering a lot of these shippy questions the same. Ten/Rose in principle is a good ship, though not one that I could imagine lasting even Rose’s entire remaining lifespan, let alone the Doctor’s. And that’s not a criticism of their relationship, because I really believe that some genuinely good relationships aren’t meant to last “forever.” Like, I sort of see them as a kind of college romance? A good relationship that runs its natural course and they both move on, forever changed for the better by the time they spent together, and forever holding a special place in each other’s hearts, but both OK with having moved on. But ten years on, I’m just kind of bored with it all now. HOWEVER, David and Billie are doing a Big Finish box set, so we’ll see if they can rekindle my excitement for the Ten/Rose ship at all.

4. Have you added anything cracky/hilarious to your fandom, if so, what?

Probably the Trees of Rassilon headcannon that @theenigmaofriversong and I sort of riffed on each other about.

5. What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom?

Well, I joined rec.arts.drwho in the early 90s, though spent some years later on being a Whovian but not so much in fandom. But there’s no fandom that I’ve spent more time in than this one. I am constant in my affections.

6. Do you remember your first OTP, if so who was in it?

Probably Mulder/Scully. I can’t remember one before them.

7. Name a fandom you didn’t care/think about until you saw it all over Tumblr.

Parks and Recreation

8. Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves (chars you’re neutral on are fair game, as are chars you dislike).

The Sixth Doctor is way better in the audios than I remember him being from the classic series--much more thoughtful and a bit less abrasive. Also his flirting with River is adorable.

9. Name three things you wish you saw more of in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

Eight, Liv, Helen fanfic & fan art

Enthusiasm for and content about Classic Who and Big Finish

More well-informed criticism and meta of all eras; less ridiculous hatred dressed up as legitimate criticism based on bad analysis of certain characters and showrunners.

10. Choose a song at random; which ship or character does it remind you of?

“Cosmic Love” by Florence + the Machine; Doctor/River

11. A pairing you ship that you don’t think anyone else ships.

This would be extremely unlikely to happen, since I pretty much don’t bother with ships that aren’t canon or at least heavily implied.

12. Your most scandalous headcanon for your current OTP(s)/OT3(s)/OTX(s).

River never picks up her socks, and it drives the Doctor nuts when they’re living together for 24 years. Eventually in a fit of rage he gathers all the dirty socks up and instead of washing them and putting them away like usual, he chucks them in a black hole. It takes River a week to notice she doesn’t have any socks and another month to bother getting new socks. She doesn’t pick those ones up either.

I literally just made that up on the spot. I didn’t have any scandalous headcanons; this is the best I could do.

13. Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending, about anything at all (gender identity, sexual or romantic orientation, extended family, sexual preferences like top/bottom/switch, relationship with poetry, seriously anything)?

The Doctor is varying degrees of asexual, depending on their incarnation. Some regenerations are demi, and some are sex-repulsed. Almost all the Doctor’s regenerations are panromantic, but a couple are aromantic.

14. 5 favorite characters from 5 different fandoms.

The Doctor (all of them), from Doctor Who

Samantha Carter, Stargate SG-1

Susan Ivanova, from Babylon 5

Tiffany Aching, Discworld

Rupert Giles, from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

15. 3 OTPs from 3 different fandoms.

Doctor/River, Doctor Who

Sam/Jack, Stargate SG-1

John/Delenn, Babylon 5

16. 5 brotps:

Twelve & Clara <3 <3 <3

Ten & Donna

Eight & Lucie

Leela & K-9

I strongly suspect that Benny and Warner!Doctor are becoming another...

17. Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go (prompts optional but encouraged).

I listened to “The Auntie Matter” this morning. It’s a Fourth Doctor and Romana I audio in the style of a PG Wodehouse comedy and it’s hilarious and perfect and just way way too short; why aren’t there more Wodehouse/Wilde-style Doctor Who stories??? And then in the commentary at the end, the cast and crew talked about how Mary Tamm fell ill shortly before they were to begin recording, but she insisted on doing the audios despite her illness, and although they completed that run, she died six months before the first of them was released. Tom Baker talked about losing Lis Sladen and Mary Tamm and Caroline John all in the space of about a year, and I was crying, remembering what it felt like at the time to lose these people I never knew but loved nonetheless, and thinking how much more keenly those who actually knew them must have felt their loss. But also what a privilege we have, that in a way they’re still with us, because of this amazing body of work.

Tagging (only if you wanna do it): @animate-mush @ravenskyewalker @theenigmaofriversong @evilqueenofgallifrey @mewiet

#doctor who #fandom tag meme thingy

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sakurablossomstorm-blog · 7 years

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12. "Take my jacket; it's cold outside," 18. "Here, drink this. You'll feel better," 81. "Sweet dreams," and/or 98. "Take a deep breath." 😀

Here you go! Sorry they took so long!

~~~~

12. ‘Take my jacket; it’s cold outside’

“We’re low on diapers,” Leslie announced as she walked into the bedroom. “Well…kind of low, we still have three big boxes left but the way these guys are pooping they’ll be gone by tomorrow.”

Ben turned to face her, sniffing loudly. He was bed bound thanks to a nasty late January cold, and Leslie was somehow managing to cater to his every need, all while looking after their triple cherries.

He rubbed his eyes and sighed. It should be him gearing up to do the diaper run for their eight week olds, not her. She did all the hard work bringing them into this world, and he was lying in bed like a lump, not even able to conquer a measly cold.

“I’ll go” Ben croaked out, attempting to push the covers back, but failing miserably. Good lord, were they made of brick? He swore they weren’t that heavy when he climbed back into bed after his third mad dash to the bathroom to vomit.

“No you don’t!” Leslie exclaimed, gently easing him back into the pillows and relieving him of his failed attempt to get out of bed. She pressed a hand to his forehead and tutted. “You’re still burning up.”

“It’s not fair on you though” Ben mumbled, closing his eyes miserably. “I should be doing diaper runs and making sure you’re getting enough sleep.”

Leslie smiled and pressed a kiss to his searing forehead. “I don’t mind, food n stuff isn’t far away. I’ll be back before you know it, the babies are asleep but are you okay dealing with them if they start crying? They should be alright but it’s easier to leave them here rather than have to get the stroller out.”

“I’ll look after them” Ben sniffed and sat up slightly.

“Only if they cry,” Leslie reminded him. “You need your rest too mister.”

She stroked his damp, wild hair a few times before kissing him softly. “I’ll be back in ten” she said as she made her way towards the bedroom door.

“Take my jacket, it’s cold outside” Ben called drearily from his position, and Leslie grinned. This cold had really knocked him down a few pegs that he couldn’t bear to see Leslie get sick too.

“I will” Leslie called back, and after peering into the nursery and whispering a gentle goodbye to their babies, she left.

~~~~

18. ‘Here, drink this. You’ll feel better.’

“How are you feeling?” Ben asked, making his way to the balled up blankets in the middle of the bed.

There was no response. He smirked and placed a hand in the centre of the pile, and it shifted slightly.

“Oh good, so you are alive” Ben grinned and took a seat next to the pile of blankets, he slowly peeled them back and came face to face with a pale, very hungover Leslie.

It was Galentine’s Day gone wild that did this to her. It started out all innocent, brunch and mimosas like usual. Then Donna suggested after work that they go to the Snakehole Lounge, so Leslie, Ann, April and a couple women from Human Resources tagged along. Naturally there were more cocktails, shots, and a ridiculous amount of vanilla flavoured vodka, Leslie was subsequently wasted.

She was presented to Ben at 3:30 that morning by a cab driver, who deposited her into Ben’s arms and asked to be paid. There he put her to bed and placed a bucket by her side just in case.

Thankfully it didn’t have to be used, but Leslie did wake up with a hangover to end all hangovers. It was a Saturday so she didn’t have to go to work, but when she usually woke up on the dot at 5:30, she didn’t move until just now, and it was midday.

Ben flicked an errant curl out of her face and Leslie grunted. He reached over and took a glass of water from the bedside table and held it in front of her face.

“Here, drink this. You’ll feel better,” he told her, and Leslie grimaced.

“No” was the only thing she could say.

Ben rolled his eyes. “You need to drink something. You’ve not eaten or drank anything all day, just drink something for me? Please?”

Leslie groaned again at Ben’s pleading but took the glass of water and tentatively sipped it. He grinned, saying please like that always worked. She didn’t want to let him down, no matter how she was feeling.

“I’m never drinking again” she whimpered as she handed Ben the glass back.

Ben just chuckled and rubbed her back. “I know, honey. You’ll feel better soon, promise.”

Leslie just crawled into Ben’s lap and promptly fell asleep.

~~~~

81. ‘Sweet Dreams’

This is in the ‘Apartment 7C’ Universe.

The vibrating of his phone on the bedside table woke Ben up from his slumber. He grunted in discomfort, thinking it was the alarm at first, but relished in the fact that it was still only 2 AM according to the clock radio.

He picked up the phone and looked at the caller ID, and frowned.

Leslie.

He quickly answered it “L’slie? You okay?” He said hoarsely.

“Yeah. I can’t sleep” Leslie’s voice replied down the phone. “What are you doing?”

“Sleeping, funnily enough” Ben said as he rubbed his eyes.

Leslie giggled “Oh. Right. Sorry.”

Leslie calling Ben had become more and more frequent after her break up with Dave. When he returned to Pawnee after spending Christmas in Minnesota, she would either come over or call him to chat. Ben just assumed she might be lonely.

“What’s up?” Ben asked, shifting onto his side.

“I don’t know…I just can’t sleep” Leslie sighed. “I’ve cleaned the apartment, baked some cookies, took a shower and I still can’t wind down.”

Ben smiled softly “Do you want me to come over?” He asked.

He really hoped she said no. Not that he didn’t want to go over there and make sure she was ok, it was just that he was so comfortable and really didn’t want to move.

He heard Leslie moving down the phone “No, don’t worry.”

Ben frowned “Okay, how about you come over to mine?”

Leslie was silent for a few minutes before replying “No. I’m pretty comfortable actually. I don’t want to move.”

Ben chuckled “Can you keep a secret? I’m really comfortable too, so I was really hoping you would say no.”

A rush of warmth spread through him when he heard Leslie laugh in response, and then give a small sigh. “I guess I am feeling a little sleepy, maybe I just needed to talk to someone.”

“That’s understandable” Ben said. “And you know I’m always here for you, right?”

“Yeah.”

“But my office hours are from 9 AM to 7 PM, so next time I’ll ignore your calls” He joked and Leslie gasped.

“You’re so mean!” She whined and Ben just smirked.

“Promise me you are going to try and get some sleep?” Ben asked and Leslie grunted in reply.

“I’ll try. But I can’t promise anything” Leslie mumbled.

“Alright. Well, goodnight, Leslie” Ben said softly.

“Goodnight, Ben…Sweet dreams.”

As Ben placed his phone back on the side, a pang of sadness flooded through him. Because now all he wanted to do was run across the hall, kick down her door and climb into bed with her, soothing her into a peaceful sleep.

She’d sleep if he was next to her, he decided.

~~~~

98. ‘Take a deep breath.’

“Sonia, why did you do that?”

The little girl shifted on the balls of her feet and looked at her hands, refusing to look up at Ben.

“Sonia, I asked you a question,” Ben said sternly.

“I…” That’s all Sonia managed to choke out before promptly bursting into tears, she brought her hands up and balled them into fists as she sobbed loudly.

And in that moment, Ben decided he couldn’t be mad at his daughter anymore. His heart sagged miserably at the sound of Sonia crying and he bent down to her level.

“Hey, hey, honey. Don’t cry” Ben soothed as he pulled her into his arms. “It’s okay, Sonny, please don’t cry.”

“I…I didn’t m-mean to” Sonia whimpered as tears stained Ben’s shirt.

“I know you didn’t sweetheart,” Ben cooed as he rubbed her tiny back.

“B-but Daddy’s mad at me” Sonia whined as she continued to cry.

“No, not at all, I’m not mad at you. Promise” Ben told her. “I just want to know why you did that? Mommy’s upset too.”

“I…I” Sonia tried to get out but was overcome with more tears. Ben pulled her away to look at her face, and wiped away the tears running down her red cheeks.

“Come on. Take a deep breath,” he told her, and Sonia managed to choke back her tears enough to take a long, ragged breath.

“Good girl. I’m not mad at you, okay? Just promise that you won’t do it again,” Ben said as he stroked Sonia’s long blonde hair.

“I-I won’t” Sonia said, nodding profusely. And Ben placed a kiss on her forehead.

“Alright, good girl. Go on, go and play with your brothers” He said, ushering her out of the room, and Sonia sniffed back the last of her tears and ran out of the room.

“So what happened?” Leslie asked, hurrying into the bedroom after Sonia had left.

“It’s fine” Ben said. “She got all upset so…y’know I just hugged her and told her we weren’t mad.”

“We weren’t mad! Ben, are you kidding me? She flushed my phone down the toilet! My phone that had all my work emails on, I can’t get another replacement for a week, how am I meant to read work emails on the way to work when I don’t have my computer?” Leslie snapped loudly.

Ben found himself taking a step backwards. “I’m sorry, but she just looked so adorable when she was crying and it really upset me seeing her like this and…”

He trailed off when he noticed Leslie’s nostrils flaring.

“You are too soft on her” she accused angrily before storming off down the hall.

Ben knew she was right, he was too soft on her, but it was hard not to be. She was his only daughter, and he naturally had a soft spot for her.

And she also had him wrapped around her little finger and knew how to play him like a fiddle.

#supervanillabear31 #thanks for the asks #parks and rec fic

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