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i think i only actually really think of myself to be “ugly” when i compare myself to things that i’m not. i look at myself in terms of how feminine or sparkly or dainty i can look. and that’s not me. of course i’m not going to live up to standards that i’m not even close to wanting to achieve. feminine girls are beautiful, but i’m just not one of them. and that’s okay. butches have beauty that differs from femininity, and that’s okay.

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meta + being left alone

At first, it didnt seem so bad. The Reds and Blues had gone off and left, and good riddance, Grif hated those guys. At least, that’s what he’d repeated to himself over and over since he’d seen the ships leave atmosphere. Now that they were gone, he didnt have to worry about getting into stupid situations. He could focus on the things that were important to Dexter Grif.

The first thing he did was take a nap.

The next thing he did was raid the fridge. Both at Red base and Blue base.

It didnt take long for it to sink in that the guys were really gone though. Grif had left the dishes in the sink, almost like he was waiting for the quiet, exasperated sigh that signaled Simmons had noticed. There was no Sarge tinkering in his workshop, no Donut to wander in on while he was in a compromising position.

No Carolina to sit by the waterfall and talk with. No Caboose to do… Caboose things.

The silence started getting to him after a couple days. A decade of shouting, of people being around and doing stupid things meant that the dead quiet of an empty moon was deafening. Grif played his music to keep himself occupied, and took a nap. 

His music got old fast.

So did Simmons’, Sarge’s, Donut’s… It didnt take him long to make it through even the Blues’ playlists. Then he moved on to their movie libraries. The one movie that he ended up watching the most was their shitty Reservoir Dogs remake, though that one made him want to cry because of fucking Church.

Grif lost track of hours faster than he was expecting. He slept when he was tired,ate when hungry. Who needed to keep a schedule when there was no one around to impress? His hygiene was never great, but Grif really let it fall apart. Showers and shaving rarely happened. When he’d made it through even Tucker’s intimidatingly large collection of porn, he started running into trouble with the Quiet again. The longer the Quiet went on, the more Grif started hearing things that werent really there.

The volleyballs were an attempt to try and bring some sense of companionship to him. And the project did seem to help, at first, especially given that he had to learn Spanish specifically so that he could voice Lopez. Pretty soon, he found himself supplying all the noise that he could. He talked to the guys and they had to talk back to him. Thats how it worked. Keeping track of time was pointless, he had oodles of it now.

The bases were cleaned within an inch of their lives several times. Maybe if he made Iris nice for them, the guys would come back? He needed them to come back. They were never coming back, were they?

I’m going to die alone here. And you’d deserve it, dirtbag. Yeah Grif, why the fuck would we come back for your selfish ass? After all the shit you’ve pulled? 

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anyone else ever feel like you’re on a timeline and you’re running out of time? like to fall in love or get your life together?? yeah cause same

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there is literally nobody cooler than autistic people whos special interest is old toons and thats a fact

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Have people figured out what happens in the “ant” dimension yet? My guesses are

  • QR code for Animal Crossing
  • An ant
  • “April fools”
  • After a few hours it starts placing other colors
  • It continues to look like old school TV static because it is. In many languages, including Swedish, this static is referred to as “war of the ants” or a few more also reference ants in some way. The “ant” dimension is a single ant, doing the work of thousands of pixels. Be patient. It is doing its best.
  • QR code for a rick roll
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Do you have any ideas for yandereverse TV shows like sitcoms or soap operas, reality shows, cooking channels, etc? All I have so far is basically Shark Tank for yandere shopping.

You know that show naked and afraid? or the bachelor/Bachelorette? How about a mix!

Ok so let’s say some show producers stalk a darling for every season, and they send out on a dark web website this pamphlet for how to win the darlings heart and what not. A list of likes, dislikes, hobbies, diseases and disabilities, sexual orientation, and some good photos you aren’t aware exist. (No nudes! Gotta have some standards! )

But to win the darling, ten people come to an island to survive. They have to prove they’d literally go through hell to be with their darling and show they have the skills to make sure they won’t “escape their love and devotion”.

People are allowed to severely maim and even kill one another but only during the last week of the challenge if Five or more contestants remain. However, if fewer than five are left, then they all get a 48 hour challenge/chance to soothe the darling and prove they’re the better choice.

Sometimes the darlings are utterly terrified and can’t choose so the producers make a fake decision and threaten the life of the darling if they protest or try to scream for help. Some thing have to be scripted of course!

Winner gets the darling and twenty thousand dollars to spend how they please along with the pride of knowing they survived the wild in the name of “love”.


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