#okay how are we feeling

[egophiliac]

(almost) four years in, and I finally had time to draw something for the anniversary! woo! 🎉🎉🎉

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #because i need to talk for a minute about how the plot of the anniversary story so far is literally just #crowley jumpscares us in our living room to demand we make him lunch and yuu is just like 'i need to start locking the door' #oh twst you always know just how to get me #the qol updates though! CONVERTING SINGLE KEYS INTO 10-SETS YES THANK YOU OH MY GOD #SKIP LESSON TICKETS!!!! #3X BATTLE SPEED!!!!!!!!!!!! #SAVE TEAM BUILDS AND SUPPORT CARDS FINALLY AHHHHH #oh and some other stuff too but look i NEEDED these things #also master chef grim! he's so precious! #though he's not going to get a little sporty uniform after all? #grim canonically flies in the nude i guess #no it's okay chef grim is ADORABLE #if you zoom in on his card you can see little smoodges from his inexpert cake decoration 😭 #which on the one hand is cute but on the other hand i'd been convinced he'd just slapped some frosting and candles on an actual can of tuna #anyway happy (a few days until the) fourth anniversary everybody! #i've been here since the beginning (preregistered during the dorm reveals babyyyy) and it REALLY doesn't feel like it's been four years #you know what they say: time flies when you're watching anime characters have emotional problems

[dcangel]

luke castellan who’s normally pretty docile in camp (at least when all the other campers and counselors are around) but it’s when you happen to spot his pretty face easily in a crowd, noticing that stupid shit eating grin that’s only ever worn when you’re below him, crying from the relentless overstimulation, that you can feel your knees buckle, and maybe even a slight tensing of the muscles in your thighs. to you, it’s almost concerning how easily he can make your stomach do flips and have your thoughts consist of him and only him while you’re supposed to be helping the younger campers string their camp beads.

the very same concern wasn’t anywhere to be found when luke had you under him later that night. perhaps it drifted through the cracked-open window along with the rest of your thoughts, and the muggy air that inhabited the hermes cabin. no way in hell was there anything behind your eyes as luke dumbed you down. he made sure of it by letting his hips set their own pace. one that abused your inner walls and left arousal seeping out from under his dick, only to get fucked back in once he picked your thighs up and brought you even closer. luke hadn’t particularly explored the asphyxiation fetish you casually described while innocently picking strawberries one day, but what better moment to test the waters than right now?

seeing a large, veiny hand wrapped around your throat was definitely his thing. he was sure of this by the way you seemed to come undone from his added touch. and to luke, overstimulation was no excuse to stop pounding away at your weepy cunt.

#so… #how we feeling abt this one yall #i definitely don’t have luke’s character down #but it’s okay #(pls forgive me) #luke castellan pjo #luke’s!world #luke castellan smut #luke castellan x reader #luke pjo #luke castellan #luke castellan pjo smut #luke castellan x you #luke castellan x reader smut

[cheeseanonioncrisps]

Emotional scene from Muppets Star Trek.

#star trek #muppets #data tng #picard #tng #kermit #fan art #next gen #okay so like… #this is obviously mostly intended as a joke but also #human is arbitrary #especially in star trek where every other planet seems to have its own sapient nonhuman species #human is fucking arbitrary #data holds humanhood as the ideal because he was built by humans #but also because the qualities that are most often used to define him as 'lesser' are qualities that humans especially seem to prize #nobody's tries to claim that vulcans aren't real people because they don't feel emotion #or that ferengi don't show enough empathy to qualify #we don't get any betazoids going around saying that true personhood is defined by how good you are at mindreading #in a world where the enterprise was crewed by muppets #and data genuinely was the closest thing to a human onboard #Measure Of A Man would have been about Picard trying to prove that you can't have someone dismantled #just because they can't sing or travel by map

[ewwww-what]

friendship so strong it grants you a sixth level spell slot. I have words to say.

#you aren’t always supposed to handle doubt alone. #even if you aren’t afraid of the dark it’s easier to navigate with someone holding your hand #Kristen said ​‘I just love my friends. I love my friends so much.’ #and Fig said ‘maybe I’m not an artist. maybe I’m just a really good friend.’ #and everyone in the world wanted me to be okay and normal about it #queerplatonic love comes in so many forms and this is one of them #fig and Kristen. fig and Kristen. fig. Kristen. #also also #I’ve been so emotional about the fact that all of the bad kids care so deeply about Cassandra despite not worshiping her #‘​I believe in Cassandra because I’ve seen her!’ like they have come eye to eye with a goddess and chose the mutual friends route #god I love it so much #also nonbinary fig believers how are we feeling tonight #fantasy high #d20 #d20 fantasy high #d20 fanart #fh #fantasy high fanart #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #d20 fhjy #fig faeth #fig fantasy high #kristen applebees #kristen fantasy high #faebees #queerplatonic #that’s important to me. that is an important part of this. #undescribed #my art

[theoldkyokodied]

Uploading all my Tomgreg art at once from the past few week before season 4 hits, who knows in what kind of mental state i'm gonna be once it does :')

#tomgreg #succession #dont even talk to me i started watching this show when i had nothing to do at work and now i watch it with averiel my good friend averiel #and we are going to watch s4 together and i feel physically ill from bein so excited #so ya thats what ive been up to... anyway. i love these idiots they desever nothing but the worst (affectionate) #im also a tomshiv lover btw. im the one who yells 'THIS IS HOW TOMSHIV CAN STILL WIN' while they are actively losing on screen #thats the kind of person i am #dont look at me (lying on the floor) #okay i was not going to say stuff in the tags and let the art speak for itself but i NEED to point out details in the wine Painting.. #i put a lot of work into that one. thinly veiled metaphors and symbolism yknow.. #greg is gripping the stem of the wine glass with his full fist. tom and greg are dressed in the same outfit (sock garters included) #greg look appalled but he is not doing anything about the spill. tom is fondly pouring greg more and more wine. he is doing him a favor #i colored the red wine the same way i would color blood :) oh and tom is not really touching greg #only holding the chair in place. greg is making himself look smaller than he is like usual #oh and @ the person who said that it's the inverse of the tom and nate scene i love the way you think. i did not think of that before #but god. yeah. i actually thought about the scene change from when roman uhh.. christens his office in s1. the one with the coffee machine #i always go insane at that cut. this is not exactly the same since it's more.. about emotions but yknow.. it can be.. the same...

[ruporas]

can’t talk about it

[ID: Black and white comic of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. The comic starts with the sounds "thud, thud, click". Vash, mid-action of peeling an apple, turns to the sound, noticing who it was that entered, and says, "Oh, Wolfwood, you're back." He resumes back to his apple in the next panel as he speaks, "Where'd you go? You snuck out of bed quickly this morning..." Wolfwood's hand then enters the panel, hovering over Vash's cheek and Vash looks up as Wolfwood asks, "Can I?" Vash responds, "Not going to talk about it?" while using a hand to gently hold Wolfwood's hovering hand and presses a kiss to his inner palm.

Vash then gets up fully, setting down the knife down on the table and the apple onto a plate, He leans into Wolfwood as Wolfwood explains, "Had to meet someone. Nothing interesting to talk about." Vash kisses Wolfwood's left cheek and a hand moves to cup his other cheek while muttering, "You're being vague." Wolfwood says neutrally, "If yer really that curious, keep askin'. We  can talk about that instead of doing this." Vash leans back and responds, "Let's talk after, since... You look so tired."

The panel pans to a close up of Wolfwood's downcast eyes, bags heavy underneath his eyes. He doesn't allow Vash to sit in that moment for long though, then saying, "Yer not helping, Spikey. Being all slow with it... I could fall asleep right now." He moves his hand to start unclasping Vash's coat, starting from his collar. Vash with red cheeks, responds briskly, "Oh, shut up. I'm worried about you. I can't be worried?"

The final shot shows Wolfwood's back to the viewer while Vash's softened expression can be seen as he holds gently onto the side of Wolfwood's face and a hand firm on his waist. Wolfwood responds, "I'm fine, seriously," pausing for a moment before continuing, "Is it okay to still..?" Vash responds, "Yeah, it's okay."

The next image is a shot from later that night after the previous comic. Vash and Wolfwood are now in bed, half naked. Wolfwood's buries his face into Vash's chest, his arms wrapped around him, while Vash is petting at his hair. Vash reminds him, "Hey. You said we'd talk about it." Wolfwood pauses for a moment before piping up, "In the morning? I'm sleepy." Vash says, "Okay..."

The next two pages start from the morning after. Wolfwood is already fully awake, pulling on his outer jacket as he says to Vash, whos' still bundled in his blankets, "Breakfast is on the table. Make sure to eat it. I'm going to grab some things in town and then we're leavin'. Got it?" Vash says, "Mh." Wolfwood responds, "Good. See ya in a bit." The dialogue starts to shift into Vash's inner thoughts now, as he gets up and eats toast, thinking, "Wait. Weren't we supposed to... talk about it?" The next shot then shows him fully up, meeting Wolfwood in town. He carries a half worried expression with him while Wolfwood slides on his glasses for him. A quick panel shows Wolfwood's tired expression from the night before and quickly juxtaposes with Wolfwood in front of him who's smiling gently, the shades covering his eye bags. Wolfwood asks him, "Still not awake yet?" Vash pauses, his thoughts stirring, thinking, "Oh. I guess I was getting ahead of myself... thinking you owe me that kind of honesty." He smiles at Wolfwood and responds, "I'm awake!" His thoughts continue, "Maybe one day, you'd trust me enough to share your burdens."

The final image shows Wolfwood pulling at Vash's cheek and Vash complains, "Owwwww why..." Wolfwood quickly says, "You were thinking something stupid, right? It's all over yer face." Vash mutters, "Nooo, I wasn't..." END ID]

#vashwood #trigun #trigun maximum #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #Theyre both thoroughly exhausted tired individuals -- vash having to fight this lonely battle for over a hundred years and getting dragged #back into inevitable situation with knives after a 2 years hiatus of being a gunslinger. they both need so much Rest and comfort in this #department... .SIGHS. BUT I JUST THINK ABOUT WOLFWOOD . AND HOW... LITTLE He has existed on no man's land. how majority of his years being #alive is being used as a weapon and to kill when him at his very core is the most giving and selfless individual ever #badlands rumble inspired me a bit but i do think wolfwood gets dragged into occasional tasks from the eye of michael while on his duty of #guiding vash -- or i think that one chapter where we got to see other members of eom -- there's like a clear division within the eom too #i think.... so i figured similarly to vash but not to the same amount -- there are people that look for wolfwood too. but most of the time #it's probably wolfwood that has to look for someone else and take them out. i feel like it happens ever so occasionally. #evidentially these two don't talk enough canonically but they always know how to express things properly to affirm that they're okay #they have the worst time ever sharing burdens - can't willingly burden the other and has neeever asked for help or reprieve in their #desperate situations... vw is a huge case of right person wrong time syndrome so they just. in the time they get to spend together -- even #if romantically - they don't have enough time to heal to get over that kind of hurdle. They've just never asked for help in all the years #they've been alive -- they don't even know how to and its just aughhhsgskg #and well! they don't even need to ask! because they'll be there for each other anyway at the end of the day -- company and presence alone. #ruporas art

[uncanny-tranny]

I think it would really benefit people to internalize that mental illnesses are often chronic and not acute. Some of us will never be able to jump the hurdle of managing illness, much less sustaining a sense of normalcy. Many of us will never "recover," will never manage symptoms, will never even come close to appearing normal - and this is for any condition, even the ones labeled as "simple" disorders or "easy-to-manage" disorders.

It isn't a failure if you cannot manage your symptoms. It isn't a moral failure, and you aren't an awful person. You are human. There's only so much you can do before recognizing that you cannot lift the world. Give yourself the space to be ill because, functionally, you are.

#mental health #mental health advocacy #like... anxiety and depression are often concieved of as simple and easy to manage... #...but that isn't the case for so many of us. anxiety and depression just have a lot more research invested into them... #...and while i wish this were the case for literally every other condition it does alter people's perception of you to some extent... #...so while this is NOT solely about anxiety or depression it includes us... #...my anxiety and depression and PTSD have *destroyed* my life. this is chronic and will probably be life-long... #...and that isn't my fault. i've done the fucking work but guess what? that doesn't account for the fact that I Am Just ILL #the least we can do for each other is to be compassionate #be compassionate to those who cannot heal. be compassionate to the people who can't manage their lives. this world is scary enough #recognize that management of symptoms is something not all of us can do - even IF their condition is labeled as 'easy to manage' #i allowed myself to feel angry that i can't heal 'normally' and that was unfair as fuck toward myself #and i NEED people to internalize this so that MAYBE this could help somebody else who is where i was #i NEED them to understand that it's okay that they are where they are - sometimes shit just doesn't turn out how you expect or want #don't beat yourself over you being a person. you are struggling enough. you deserve to rest. just rest please #and just... give yourself space

[hajihiko]

Trainwreck in double speed

#Fuyuhiko kuzuryu #Peko pekoyama #kuzupeko #super danganronpa 2 #sdr2 #an art #Fuyuhiko ruining himself with the pressure and violence and fitting into shoes he neither fits nor wants #Peko ruining herself by erasing herself and falling into a role she hates for someone she loves #Both of them shaving off bits of themselves until they're just not the same people at all in a bad way. Together through it all! #Both of them hate it but are powerless to change what they were sculpted into! #Anyway. How are we feeling tonight guys. I'm having weird feelings about family (not found but obligatory) #(Hiko and Peko aren't found family they actually are. Enforced obligatory family that's barely even family.) #(That's NOT as in they dont care about each other they care so much. But they didnt grow up as family or friends) #(They grew up through obligation) #OKAY time to stop talking

[gulducock]

look at this pic i found on twitter

#mine #hi heres my star trek take for today #does anyone else feel a little teeny bit weird when peeople talk abou t #wait ok hold on spoilers for s7 of ds9. dont read ahead ok #does anyone feel weird when peopeple joke about how kai winn and dukat were such a good couple when he like. raped her #like i know why they do but did no one think about that whole story arc hard enoigh to realize what he did to her #explicitly stated on screen. like thats verbatim unconcensual sex what happened and everyones liek its funny because dukats funny #and kai winn is a bitch which she is but also idk. does this make sense #ok thats my thought this have nothing to do with the abive image #i just didnt want to make this into a text post :| anyohe else get scared when dukat is on the scren #okay goodbye. im rewatching viyager btw not fr im just putting it on for comfort whenever i feel sick which is often LOL! but like on n off #can we make the doctor more popular than data =. keep going warriors

[hunrising]

What’s baffling to me is that according to what western governments/media said these past days, hamas shouldn’t have attacked civilians in response to the violence they’ve been suffering for decades because it violates international laws, and I agree, civilians shouldn’t have been victims of an attack like this. However now, according to those same people, Israel has the absolute right to defend itself and have no other option but to respond aggressively, no matter how many civilians get caught in the crossfire, and thus also violating international laws? I’ve been racking my brain to see if I’m missing something, or if all of these politicians and journalists are intentionally contradicting themselves in order to please each other?

#I’m sorry I know I keep going back and forth with the topic but 1) I genuinely can’t stop thinking about it #and it feels wrong to stop thinking about it #and 2) I’m truly trying to understand how they can get away with lying and openly saying #‘we’re okay with the ethnic cleansing of palestinians’ #i understand the reason on their basic level (they do not care about brown people) #but surely they should at least pretend that they do? #I don’t know I feel like I’m being gaslit on a global level rn #because I know that as brown/muslim people we are never 100% safe in the west but this feels like it’s on another level #palestine

[where-our-stories-start]

Heartstopper (2x08): Perfect

#heartstopper #heartstopper season 2 #heartstopper 2x08 #charlie spring #nick nelson #joe locke #kit connor #charlie x nick #okay but can we talk about how HEALTHY these two are #they're super supportive without being codependent #like nick doesn't want to fix charlie or charlie's issues #he just wants to be there to help charlie feel brave

[wordfather]

okok whats everyones 61th song on spotify wrapped? just a random number. i did not choose it bc mine is Building the Crate from the movie Chicken Run.

#its a good song okay!!!!! #spotify wrapped #yeah im having a lot of fun today seeing everyones silly lil music #this is so fun i feel like we're sharing toys its like show and tell #edit: 61th was an accident. not changing it. thats just how we say it now

[eskildit]

i think a lot about hot sauce and jeannemary. two young girls so ready to kill and to die. a comparison made all the worse when you recall that hot sauce lost all her family to the cohort, that she can specifically recall fourth style necromancy (using corpses as bombs). a fourteen and thirteen year old that could easily have been on opposite sides of the same front line. 

#the locked tomb #the loss of childhood! senseless violence! #opposite ends of the propaganda machine #eskildit posts tlt #all of nona the ninth #how am i supposed to tag hot sauce #jeannemary chatur #ok to rb #edit: okay im actually gonna use these tags to ramble a lil #in many ways i feel alecto the ninth is gonna be the hardest book to actually pull off #first for the obvious reason that its an ending and endings are always hard #but second because nona the ninth was by far the most political book of the series #books 1 and 2 following harrow and gideon mean we're following characters on the outskirts of the empire #gideon is individually oppressed by the ninth and even harrow is considered a black sheep outsider of the nine houses #but they are still WITHIN the houses gideon has dreams of the cohort harrow has dreams of of revitalizing her house #nona was our actual introduction to the real consequences of the empire that characters like judith like jeannemary like corona herself #have their livelihoods and status entirely built on the imperial violence we see first hand on new rho #anyway i say all of this to say it means coming back to these characters might be kinda tricky! #the cost of the empire is no longer abstract its extremely palpable! #how does one return to our core cast we've know for multiple books now that we understand that #idk. interested to see where we go!

[femmeconomics]

hate to say it, but part of ending the stigma around sexual assault means not assuming every woman blames herself. yes, female socialization encourages it, but that doesn’t make it a given, and the goal of all of these campaigns is to eventually diminish the proportion of women who do blame themselves. it is entirely possible, and increasingly common, for women to experience sexual assault and not feel shame or guilt, which we should be happy about. but instead, there are only so many times you can hear “you know it’s not your fault, right?” before it sounds like “it was your fault”. and there’s only so many times you can hear “don’t blame yourself” before it sounds like “you should blame yourself”. because it feels good to say, doesn’t it? sure, you don’t believe she’s guilty, but you do believe she should feel guilty, so that you can disabuse her of the notion. just something to consider.

#i think we are very pleased with the idea of female shame #even among people who genuinely do not believe women are at fault for being assaulted #you are still meant to pay the penance of suffering and self destruction #god fucking knows why #“i got mugged” “aww don’t blame yourself for walking around with those fancy shoes and visible wallet okay? it’s not your fault” #you’d be like girl what. i didn’t fucking say it was my fault but your mind sure jumped there fast 🤨 #“my mom died” “wow. do you feel terrible crippling shame for everything you’ve ever done wrong in your life? #up to and including causing your mom’s death? because that would be totally wrong if you did” #like how could that possibly be an appropriate response #genuinely i think the feeling that i was going completely insane post-being raped because no one would believe i didn’t blame myself #was like. solidly half as traumatic as the actual event #like. it is okay not to feel guilty and shameful. it’s great actually. you’re not having the wrong response.

[balkanradfem]

I'm reading the 'Age of Surveillance Capitalism' book by Shoshana Zuboff, and it is haunting me, making me feel uncomfortable and making me want to move offline.

We've all been aware that google, facebook, and all other digital tech companies are taking our data and selling it to advertisers, but according to the book, that is not the end goal.

The book goes into the rise of google, and how it made itself better by constantly studying the searches people were inputting, and learning how to offer better information faster. Then, they were able to develop ways to target adverts, without even selling the data, but by making their own decisions of what adds should be targeted at what audience. But they kept collecting more and more data, and basically studying human behaviour the way scientists study animals, without their knowledge or consent. Then they bought youtube, precisely because youtube had such vast amounts of human behaviour that could be stored and studied.

But they're not only using that data to target adds at us. They've been collecting data in ways that feel unexpected and startling to me. And whenever they're challenged or confronted with it, they pretend it was a mistake, or unintentional, and it's scary how far they've been able to get away with it.

For example, during their street-view data collecting, the google car had been connecting to every wifi available and taking encrypted, personal data from households. When they got found out, they've explained it was not intentional, and a fault of a lone researcher who had gone rouge, and they evaded getting sued or being held accountable for it at all. Countries have created new laws and regulations and google kept evading it and in the end they claimed 'you know if you keep trying to regulate us, we'll just do things secretly'. Which is a wild thing to say and expect to get away with!

Another thing that struck me was that governments, which at first wanted to restrict data collection, later asked tech companies to monitor and prevent content connected to terrorism, and the companies didn't like the idea of being a tool of the government, so they claimed the terrorism data is being banned for 'being against their policy'. Which makes me believe they didn't want to remove that content at all, after all, they could have done it beforehand, they didn't feel any natural incentives to do so.

The entire story is filled with researchers who don't seem to experience the human population as other human beings. They don't believe we deserve privacy, or dignity, or any say in what is being collected or done to us. Hearing their quotes and how they describe the people they're researching shows clearly they consider us all stupid, and our desires for privacy, self-harming. They insist we'd be better off if we just accepted their authority and gave them any data they wanted without complaining or being upset it's being collected without our knowledge.

Even though companies claim at all times that the data is non-identifiable, the book explains just how data is handled and how easy it is to identify anyone whose private conversations are recorded; people say their names, their addresses, places they're going, friends they're meeting, they say names of their family members, their devices record their location and their habits, it is extremely easy to identify anyone whose information has been collected. It can be identified and sold to information agencies.

I believed when it was explained to me that most of the data collection was just for add targeting, and that it would be used only for advertisement purposes, but they're not only collecting data anymore, they're deciding what data is being fed to us, and recording our reactions, learning how they can affect and manipulate our behaviour. We know all algorithms feed us controversial, enraging and highly-emotional content in order to drive engagement, but it's more than that. They've discovered how they can influence more or less people to vote. The mere idea of that makes me go cold, but they talk about it like it's just another thing they can do, so why not? Companies who have experimented and learned so much about influencing human behaviour give themselves the right to influence it as they see fit, because why wouldn't they? Since they have the power to do it, and all lawsuits and regulations can't stop them, why wouldn't they make a game out of it?

I can't imagine how many experiments they did before feeling so confident and blase about this and casually influencing the elections, again, seemingly just for the sake of an experiment.

The book compares this type of behaviour manipulation to totalitarianism and surveillance state, and it shows how the population is slowly losing parts of their freedoms without realizing it is even happening. Human behaviour has changed due to online influence, and it keeps changing rapidly, with every new popular website that is influencing human behaviour. They've learned that humans are influenced mostly by behaviour of other humans, and they can decide what kind of content or influence to send our way to get desired results.

I love how the author of the book talks about humanity. She uses the term 'human future', as something we all have the right to, as opposed to future controlled by companies and influences. She describes how regular people were affected by the data collected against their will, and how they fought for their 'right to be forgotten', when google kept displaying their past struggles, damaging their dignity. She also explains the questions people should ask about how society is led: First question is, who knows? Second question, who decides? Third question, who decides who decides? She goes in detail about how the answers are held away from us, and what it does to us. She also touches very deeply on the idea of human freedom!

I recommend this book, even though it will make you feel far less secure and carefree to be online, and using anything google, facebook, twitter or any of their owned services. They are not free, and it's also incorrect to say that we're the product of them, but we are the source of the raw materials they collect in order to gain results.

#the age of surveillance capitalism #shoshana zuboff #i've learned so much #but also i do not feel okay #how about we shut down google facebook and all that #but i still wanna watch youtube T_T #they really got me with that one #and this site also has me in chokehold #other services i do not care about

[medicalunprofessional]

#psychonauts #gristol malik #theodore malik #<-Yeah. Hes there #psychonauts 2 spoiler #nightmaretheater #time on canvas: 8 hours #also YES this is psychonauts fanart. I prommy. Iii prommy. its gristol when he was younger #rips my hair out rips my eyes out #Hi Ugly. Points at him #travel back in time and take him away from his parents Okay #you will get my message #as much as i hate him i feel he must be understood at some level. #im not saying we should excuse or forgive him. No. We need to understand why he turned out like that #(its his parents (he only knows propaganda)) #i have so much to say on the topic . i have been consumed by thoughts of him #kind of upsetting how the one guy with a cluster b personality disorder gets No Understanding in the Understanding Mentally Ill People game #<-once again. Not excusing his actions #also yeah sorry i had to unleash the rendering demons oops