Tumgik
#okay thats enough ta g s i guess
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EPILOGUE SEVEN
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VRISKA: Hey, Harry Anderson, giznuess where I be!
HARRIZZLE ANDERSON: whizzay fo' sheezy???
HARRY ANDERSON: Bounce wit me. whizzay be dis? i can’t hear yizzou! One, two three and to tha four.
V-R-to-tha-izziska cizzy pusha hiznand arizzle tha receiva of ha pizzy n shouts ova tha artillery barrizzle, betta check yo self.
VRIZZLE: Recognize the realness. It’s ME, idizzle! Tha HOT 8A8E you’re lucky enough ta hizzy gotten ta second 8ase wit so show some love!
HARRY ANDERSON: Recognize the realness. oh hi vriska!
H-A-DOUBLE-RIZZY ANDERSON with my forty-fo': whizzle up?
VRISKA: I Implored You Ta GIZZY WHIZZAY I 8M thats off tha hook yo!
HARRY ANDIZZLE: uh. hmm. baze' on tha horrizzle racket 'n tha background, i’m gizzy guess so show some love! tha bizzle outsizzle tha cizzle?
V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Ha HA! Holler at tha boss dogg. I TOLD you mah moms were trippin' ta H-to-tha-izzook Me Tha Fuck Up witta sweet milit8ry commission!
V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Boo-Yaa! I’m officially 'n tha rebizzle, Sucka like a fucka!!!!!!!
HARRY ANDERSON: ugh. i’m watch'n tha bizzattle out mah window rizzy now where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin'. be you SURE it’s siznafe fo` yizzay ta be out there, vrizzay aww nah?
HARRY ANDERSON: i’d kind of hate it if you dy before we gots to third baze.
VRISKA: Pfft, yizzay, wh8teva. I’m basically Immortal, bizzay.
VRISKA: I’m gonna 8reeze through here lizzay a H-to-tha-izzigh Money dippin' sweepstakes at the 8lackj8ck table!
HARRY ANDERSON: you shizzould probably actually gamble once 'n yo' life before you try ta mizzake gambl'n metaphors, bizzay so jus' chill. coz that was dire n we out!
VRISKA: Uh, excuze you, but Tavros tot8lly snuck me into Uncle Jake’s game last mizzle. It was Immoderately LIT.
HIZZLE ANDERSON: They call me tha president. wizzy but real don't give a fuck. be you still hate dat'n tavros?
VRISKA: Uhhhhhhhh... yeah with my forty-fo'? Why wizzouldn’t I be??
HIZZLE ANDIZZLE: aw dawg. hizze’s so pathetic.
VRISKA: Yeah, thiznat’s Tha Point, H-A-Double-Rizzy Anderson.
HARRY ANDERSIZZLE: hizzow d-ya stand kiss'n him? he’s so weird cuz Im tha Double O G. n alwizzles mysteriouslizzle sticky fo` some reasizzle. Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect.
HIZZLE ANDERSON: PLEAZE T-to-tha-izzell me yiznou haven’t gone ta thizzle baze wit him.
VRIZZLE: A girl D-to-tha-izzoes Not kiss n tell, Harry de8rizzle. : Hollaz to the East Side.:::)
HARRY ANDERSON bitch ass: okay well as L-to-tha-izzong as you don’t touch me rappa up hizzy weird, clammy body.
VRISKA: I’m nizzy go'n ta git a chance ta feel eitha of you up fo` A While, consider'n I’m now an Important 8bitch 'n Karkat n Meenah’s 8adizzles Revolutionarizzle Army.
VRISKA: Oh, I asked if thizzey cizzy squeeze you 'n. They S-8-to-tha-izzid they were JIZZY out of open'n let me holla at u.
VRISKA: Sorry Dude! Lol and cant no hood fuck with death rizzow.
HARRIZZLE ANDERSON: did you jizzle call me ta brag in tha dogg pound?
HARRY ANDERSON: what elze be go'n on out there?
VRISKA: Ugh, whizno knizzle.
VIZZY: Aint no stoppin' this shit. Oh. yo' DIZZAY be here.
HARRIZZLE ANDERSON: whiznat and my money on my mind?!
HARRY ANDERSON: i thiznought he D-to-tha-izzidn’t want anyth'n ta do wit tha wizzar?
VRISKA yeah yeah baby: Yeah, wiznell, he S8YS that, but hizzle here right now n mah mom’s say'n a bizzy of G8y Shit to him.
VRISKA: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. Thizzay hugg'n n Reminisc'n a8izzle how Old N Sad T-H-to-tha-izzey are or wh8teva.
HARRY ANDERSIZZLE: huh...
VRISKA: W-H-to-tha-izzat from tha streets of tha L-B-C?
HARRY ANDERSON so sit back relax new jacks get smacked: i really thought thizzat mah fatha might cizzy siznee me fo` mah birthday dis year. Im a bad boy.
VRISKA: Recognize the realness. Welp!
V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Thizzle Tha Br8ks, Kizzay.
HARRIZZLE ANDERSON: dawg.
HARRY ANDERSON: you cizzay be sizzuch a shitty girlfriend sometimes.
VIZZY: M-to-tha-izzay8e I’m inspired ta be a L-to-tha-izzess Than Ideal M8tesprit when I’m 'n tizzy prizzle of WEAKNESS? Eva consida that??
HARRY ANDERSON: unbelievable. Subscribe, get yo issue.
VRIZZAY: Hey I’m jizzay frontin' wit you! Don’t 8e such a 8a8y a8out it. Im crazy, you can't phase me. It’s a tiznot8l turnoff fo all my homies in the pen.
VRISKA: I’m siznure yo' d8d cares a8out yizzy very much. Maybe chill out?
HARRY ANDERSON: yizzy whateva. One, two three and to tha four.
HARRY ANDERSON: he’s always gett'n all weepy whenever i rap ta him anyway fo all my homies in the pen.
HARRY ANDERSON: i don’t think i could hizzy taken anotha round of him chillin' bizzack tizzay while apologiz'n ta me 'bout “whiznat happened wit me n yiznour motha, H-A-Double-Rizzy.”
HARRY ANDERSON: i M-to-tha-izzean, god. he’s nizzy even weed-smokin' DRUNK when he does dis spittin' that real shit.
HIZZLE ANDERSON spittin' that real shit: that might actually be tha most embarrass'n pizzle.
VRISKA: Y-to-tha-izzeah, lmao in all flavas.
VRISKA: Nizzy th8t you mention it, I thizzink he’s actually slackin' right nizzay? Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your fuckin' dome.
VRISKA: I thizzink I cizzle overhear...
VRISKA: Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. W8it.
V-R-to-tha-izziska stops try'n ta eavesdrizzle on John’s perpetratin' fo` a moment like a tru playa'. She’s distracted by anizzle noize if you gots a paper stack. She whizzips ha heezee around ta dizzle an all-too-familiar sound chillin' above tha saggin' silence like a fucka. It’s a S-to-tha-izzound thizzat shizze knows from hard-won experience can mean onlizzle one th'n.
Therizzles a clown nearby.
VRISKA now pass: I think I hear...
VRIZZISKA: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. GAMZIZZLE??
HARRY ANDERSON and cant no hood fuck with death rizzow: gamzee sho nuff? mah auntie jane’s gizzle? wat it do ??
VRISKA: Yes! Who ELZE could I miznean?
VRISKA: Aint no stoppin' this shit. He’s arizzle here somewhere.
HIZZLE ANDERSON: so what? i see him evizzle day dogg. he sucks.
VRIZNISKA: So WH8T?! Hizzay like, Jane’s left hizzy dawg like a tru playa'!
H-A-DOUBLE-RIZZY ANDERSON: no, hizzy “neutral,” rememba? Death row 187 4 life.
VRISKA: Tizzy not how Pusha Vantas feels, betta check yo self.
VRISKA: He sez he’s a total 8astard. A Tr8itor Ta His Kind if you gots a paper stack.
HARRY ANDERSON: yawn.
Tha dust be beginn'n ta settle around Vrizzles ankles. Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. She scans tha tree line n slackin' all playa attentizzle ta bear on dis curious rhythm of noizes com'n from nearby, beckon'n from tha undizzle. Sizzy pizzles toward it through tha thornizzle shrubbery.
VRISKA: shut up or get wet up. There’s a bounty out fo` his arrest! D8mn, T-H-to-tha-izzey’ll probablizzle piznut him 'n front of a tribunal if we cizzan git our hizzay on hiznim!
HIZZLE ANDERSON: oh, i change' mah M-to-tha-izzind keep'n it real yo. dis sounds gizzle actizzle.
HARRY ANDERSIZZLE: Put your feet up n take a breath ! invite me ta tha execizzle, please?
V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: If I could c8ptiznure tha Hiznigh Fuck'n Priest Makara they’d promote me ta, lizzle, thizzle 'n command of tha whole joint!!!!!!!!
V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Fizzay YE8H, know what im sayin?
HARRY ANDIZZLE so i can get on: wizzell.
HARRY ANDERSON: gizzle lizzay wit all that.
HARRIZZLE ANDERSON: call me if you wanna H-to-tha-izzook up afta tha battle.
VRISKA so show some love! N8turally!
John’s perpetratin' away a tear wiznith hizzis slizneeve when he cizzles S-to-tha-izzight of Vriska, innocizzle wander'n toward tha verizzle bush where he’d just abandonizzle (Vriska) ta sort out ha exhibition of unexpected n dizzle profane lust. Now that tha biznattle hizzas stillizzle, he ciznan overhear tha vile melody of tha blasphemizzles union.
ROZE to increase tha peace: Thizzles that noize again.
ROSE: shut up. I knew I wasn’t imagin'n it fo' sho'.
JOHN: oh no.
JOHN n shit: no, no, no fo all my homies in the pen...
JOHN: VRISKA, WAIT, DON’T! Dogg House Records in the fuckin house.!!!!
Jizzy rizzy to intervene, but it’s tizzle late. Vriska pushizzles asizzle tha last of tha F-R-to-tha-izzonds separat'n ha frizzle rappa quarry witta triumphant Ha keep'n it real yo!
Vriska’s huge, mischievous smile freezes on ha face. Whizzay eyes pizzay tha imizzle ta crazy ass brain, and it finally mizzles senze of dis incomprehensible jumble of gray limbs, blue n pizzurple slop, tanglizzle black hair, n stunned faces, ha expression begins ta slowly melt. It tizzy drizzay quickly, from phaze ta phaze, ta one of wonda, then anguish, n finally, abject horror.
JOHN: oh god.
Vriska n (Vriska) both start shriek'n at a pitch Jizzohn’s only eva heard one time before. It wizzas a sizzay thizzat once accompany tha end of everyth'n. A sound once heard tha night he dreamt 'n anizzle with the S-N-double-O-P.
> ==>
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two-in-one-skele · 7 years
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Every Star Needs a Night
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We are now almost three weeks past the first day since G and Yumi have been basically roommates. Times are getting cooler and the streets are betting snowier as we approach Christmas. But, even with all this freezing cold weather, it was busy outside, filled with people either preparing to go on trips or shopping for presents for the holidays. 
Through this particularly snowy day, a man walked through the streets to do neither of these things. With his hair matching the times he heads in... wait, that’s Yumi’s house! Oh, no.
- “I’m hooooooooooome!” says the unknown stranger.
His yelling woke G up and he sat up to see who could that be. It definitely wasn’t Yumi, the voice was much more boyish and lower pitched, almost nasally. As he sat up, he was face to face to a human with white hair with black highlights, green eyes and a bit paler than Yumi. Actually, wasn’t that the exact description of her-
- “WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!?” he yells very aggressively.
Meanwhile, Yumi was at her job in the StarDust Planetarium. She usually doesn’t work on the weekends, but someone took in sick. She was mildly annoyed by this, but since her friend was also working today and she only had to be in the ticket booth for a few hours it wasn’t too much of a hassle. Speaking of said friend, she poked Yumi’s shoulder out of nowhere to get her intention. Considering Yumi was lost in her thoughts it made her jolt.
“Reeen! Don’t scare me like that!” she scolds turning towards her friend. //”Ahahaha! Sorry, Yumi. Didn’t mean to scare ye. I got some new fer ye.” “...? What is it?” she tilted her head curiously.
Ren Deary was a mixed breed of a deer, bunny and cat boss monster. Her fur war beige, she had small horns on her head with bunny-like ears, most of her facial features and paws were closer to a cat, although her tail was like a deer’s. She wasn’t part of Yumi’s brother’s band, but her boyfriend and her friend, who shared a polyamorous relationship with her boyfriend, were members of it. Hence she sometimes worked as a sort of messenger between Yumi and her brother, Yoru. This was one of those cases.
//”It’s about yer brother and the others.” Ren says with a worrying smile. “Did something bad happen?” Yumi asks, worried. //”Well... kinda. They’re sorta in a pickle. The police almost caught them the other day...” she scratches her head. “What!? Was it because of--?” //“Aye... Nami’s parents.” she crosses her arms. “... Are they okay?” she asks, even more worried. //“Aye. They just need ta lay low fer a while. Soooo... they decided to come back in town! In fact, yer brother is here today! Ain’t that great?” she quickly changes to an excited smile. “Shit...” she mumbles //”Wha--?” “I-I gotta go! I-I’ll be back soon!” she says, panicked.
Yumi quickly runs outside and heads towards her house. If he arrives with G there he’ll-- oh god, it’ll be bad. The worrying thig is, she was not too far off what she thought would happen. They are already in a tense situation as we speak.
Yoru grabs a large knife in the kitchen as he thought G was a criminal who barged in Yumi’s house. He is ready to attack the “intruder” but still keeps his distance. G, on the other hand, was still sort of half asleep and trying to assess the situation. He thought for a second that it was a dream but... the human’s eyes was slowly turning redder. Dream or not he was in danger.
-”Did you do something to Yumi!? WHERE IS SHE?” Yoru yells aggressively. *Wait, what?? G replies, worried and confused. -”Oh, so you don’t know who’s house you just barged into!? Okay then... where the fuck is the woman who lives here? Tell me before I fucking make some more cracks in your skull!” he points the knife threateningly. *Jesus fucking Christ I-... she’s at work, dude! he says a little panicked. -”... Heh... Hehehehahaha. At work? ... you fucking liar.”
Before G could even respond, Yoru dashed towards him with the knife, attempting to attack him. With barely enough time for his reflexes, G barely manages to stop him from hitting anything too damaging by both turning Yoru’s soul blue and blocking the knife in between his hand hole. However, even with his pretty good reflexes, they manage to fall on the ground but, thankfully, in the same position.
-”So are you going to me the truth now...? Or are you going to continue lying!? I’ll ask you one last time... WHERE. IS. MY. SISTER? he demanded. *Fuck, man. I already fucking told you! he started to shout. -”You’re a liar... YOU’RE A LIAR AND YOU KNOW IT!
Yoru tries to push the knife further into his hand. G manages to stop him, even though it didn’t really budge much, it still hurt like shit. He grabbed Yoru’s wrist to stop him from moving too much, squeezing it as tightly as he could. Even with that, it did cut pretty deep, his hand was bleeding out DT a little. It was too painful for him to concentrate enough on his Blue Magic. Yoru’s eyes were glowing redder by the second, he needed to say something and quick before he loses control.
*Listen, guy, your sister got called in because someone announced sick at the last minute. She’s just replacing them, dammit! he said, starting to get a little pissed-off as well. -”SO WHAT? Why should I even BELIEVE you!?” *BECAUSE, you fucking idiot, I DON’T want to HURT you! I could’ve thrown you across the damn wall, but I DIDN’T! I’m not your fuckin’ enemy, as much as your name sounds really fucking stupid. he admitted, fairly aggressively.
“He’s not wrong...” Yoru thought. He knows very well the abilities of Blue Magic and their effects. He’s never seen them in person before, but he should have been easily beaten by this man who’s “aura” was much more powerful than him. Maybe even more than it’s user even knows. He lessened his strength on G’s hand hole, however, he just realized something. Did he just say his name was stupid?
-”Wait... e x u s e   m e ?” he asks passive-aggressively. *I’m sorry, but... your name is really dumb. It sounds like a cheesy superhero name a kid would create as a character. he said, flatly. -”W h a t ? What the fuck is wrong with the name ‘Yoru’!?” 
He was confused, but also kind of angry. I mean, who wouldn’t be? However, it seems this confusion is mutual. What?
*Wait what? Your name is ‘Yoru’? I thought it was-... -”What the fuck did you think it was!?” he asks angrily. *Uhh... Hyper... So-... Something...? I don’t remember it was so fuckin- -”HYPER SO-!? Pfff-heheeHAHAHEEHAHA H-HYPER FUCKING SONIC!?” he burst laughing. *Y-yes, thats what- -”HHHEHEEHEEHAHAHAHAHA!”
G was even more confused. Yoru, on the other hand, was laughing hysterically. He couldn’t believe his name was- what the fuck did his sister tell him!? It was so fucking funny though, it was like he completely forgotten about his previous anger and aggressively towards G in an instant. His laugh was much more tolerable, in a sense, than his sister’s though. It resembled more like an actual laugh or, in this case, a loud and quick giggle. Okay, yeah, he believed him now. Only his sister would’ve done a stupid reference like that.
He removed himself from G, sitting on the sofa and was about to ask him the question, but he was cut off by him, as he also wanted to ask seemingly even more important questions. He was more confused than Yoru.
*I mean... that’s what she told me. I probably should’ve known it was too stupid to be your actual name... Sorry about that. -”H-no, it’s okay. I guess you didn’t get her Sonic reference.” he giggled. *Yeah, well... what the fuck is a ‘Sonic’? he asked.
He wheezed and started laughing again. Holy fucking shit. He couldn’t breathe anymore he could barely even stand. G was even more confused. I mean, what did he say that was so funny? Well, unfortunately, he didn’t even understand the accidental “meme” he just referenced by pure coincidence. However, that’s what made it funnier to Yoru. 
However, G was weirdly glad that he was laughing, he can’t really help it, he loved seeing people genuinely laugh. Even if said person tried to kill him earlier with more or less of a good reason. Speaking of which, his hand suddenly started to burn again as it was bleeding a bit more from the cut Yoru made earlier.
-”Ah, shit I totally forgot. I’m really sorry about that!” said Yoru, nervously. *N-no it’s fine. I-I’ll live. G painfully replied. -”Give me your hand, I can heal you.” he insisted. *No, I- -”Give me your hand!”he shouted in a commanding tone.
G hesitated of obeying him. I mean, he didn’t exactly trust humans, it doesn’t help that this one in particular tried to kill him earlier. Besides, as much as he may be a wizard, compared to his sister, he’s probably not that good in magic either. He gave in, in the end and, to his surprise, it seemed like he probably judged this man too quickly. The large cut in his hand hole was slowly closing up as healing magic surrounded their hands.
-”Are you surprised? I’m much better in magic than my sister.” he giggles. *Y-yeah.. I could te- OW! -”Yeah, sorry, it might hurt sometimes. I mean, I did cut deep in your bones. It’s harder to heal.” he chuckles nervously. *Well, you could’ve told me that. he replies a bit passive-aggressively. -”Haha! My bad.” he laughs even more nervously. *...
This man was strange. Despite being seemingly as kind as his sister, G just couldn’t shake the feeling of being creeped out by him. He just couldn’t really put a finger on it. But maybe he might be a little bias, partially for a good reason. Either way, it didn’t take long before his hand was healed. It, unfortunately, left a scar, though, but he didn’t really mind it was barely visible and anyways he had worse scars, for one, the ones on his face.
-”Here you go! You’re all-”
There was a sudden thud, a multitude of them, they were quick and seemingly getting closer. Then the door was unlocking itself, nervously and violently opening. Yoru quickly held a grip on the knife he previously had, just in case. However, it was not needed as finally a familiar face had almost violently and quickly opened the door. It was Yumi, who had an extremely panicked and distressed look on her face.
“YORU, PLEASE DON’T KILL G!” she yelled. -”It’s too late, he’s already dead.” he giggles. *I-I’m right here! he says, immediately getting up from the floor. “Aaah, thank fucking God...!” she sighed, relieved.
It was a little worrisome that Yoru could just laugh off a joke like that, but what was even more worrisome is that it seemed like it was a recurring theme. What the hell did he get himself into? Suddenly he was mildly afraid about staying here. However, Yoru joyful expression quickly turned into nervousness.
-”Aaah... but... I did attack him, though. Sorry.” he scratches the back of his head. “Yoru!” she scolds him. -“Sorry! I just thought he was a burglar or something.” “A-are you hurt?” she asks, turning towards G. *I mean... I’m fine, now. “What did you do?” she turns back to her brother with a stern glare. -”I-I cut his hand hole a bit... b-but I healed it! Everything’s fine now, I swear!” he replies nervously.
She still glared at him a bit more, but let out a sigh of relief afterward. She was glad no one was hurt, really. She probably should’ve told her brother about him. I mean, its almost been a month, now.
“Um... I kinda need to tell you something.” she finally said. -”Oh! I need to tell you something too! But... you should probably go back to work, don’t you think?” he reminded. “OH SHIT!”
She just realized that she’s been away for a long time. Sure, it wasn’t that far but running there would take a good 10 minutes and, excluding the time she’s spent here, that’s 20 minutes wasted. She immediately ran out of the house cursing to herself. It was pretty funny for G and Yoru to see her as frantic.
-”Anyway, you name was G, right?” asks Yoru. *Yeah? -”What’s it stands for? ... George, maybe?”  *Heh, no. It’s not short for anythin’, it’s just... ‘G’. he chuckles. -”Oh! I thought it was a nickname or something... Well, ‘G’, how long has it been?” he asks, grinning. *3 weeks... I think? -”That long? I can’t believe she didn’t call to tell me you two were in a relationship all this time!” he pouts. *W-wait what? We’re not- we’ve MET 3 weeks ago!  -”Oooh! H-ho my god, I’m so sorry! I really thought you were- oh my god, this is awkward.” he laughs. *Geez... -”Okay, okay, so- how did you guys meet? And-... what are you doing at her place if you’ve basically just met? I mean, technically it’s been a while but... she usually doesn’t let people in her house this early! Uh-... no offence.” he explains, apologetically. *None taken... actually, it’s probably because we didn’t meet under “usual” circumstances. he admits. -”Oooo! So what happened?”
G sits down on the sofa next to him, basically preparing to explain everything. Yoru turned himself towards him, crossing his legs and laying his arm over the sofa’s back, laying his head on his hand. It was odd to see a human man act sort of “girl-ish”, not that it was a bad thing or anything, but G knows very well how humans treat this sort of thing, which he always thought was stupid, all monsters did. 
Anyways, G started to explain how he and Yumi met. He briefly mentioned how he was recently kicked out of his previous apartment before meeting her, Yoru didn’t exactly know where the story was going, but it was clear that he wasn’t exactly pleased. After G had mentioned that they were living together that’s when the protective brother side of Yoru came back out full force. His eyes were slowly turning reddish over his normal green, crossing his arms and legs, but trying his best t not get mad again. Despite seeing that the other was still trying his best to keep calm, G didn't know if it was safe to continue the story. Which is understandable, considering what happened previously. This man had a shorter fuse than he has.
*Uh... trust me, I’ve never done or thought of doing anythin’ inappropriate to your sister. I’m not that kinda guy. he tried to reassure Yoru. -”... Yeah, okay... I’ll believe you. I’m sorry it’s just that-... she’s all I have, y’know? You can’t really blame me for being really protective of her. Right...?” he tried his best to give a friendly smile. *No, I understand. Besides... I’m kinda a random stranger, after all. I mean... I guess we’re kinda friends but... y’know? Besides... this is only temporary. he smiled back a little awkwardly.
Yoru’s smile saddened a little, slightly twisting his lips sideways. Sure, he didn’t the idea but, G saying something like that was sad. It was almost like ending a friendship before it even started. He remembered that Yumi doesn’t really have many friends, maybe this could be a good opportunity. He shouldn’t be mad about this, anyway, she was an adult and she probably knows what she’s doing. Plus, G didn’t seem like a bad guy, they could be great friends, maybe even...
-”... Be good to my sister... alright?” he said softly yet almost like an order. *U-uh wha--? Oh. Y-yeah... sure. he replies, nervously and awkwardly.
G wasn’t sure where that came from or what he meant by that. It was kind of out of nowhere and caught him off guard, he didn’t want to assume anything so he tried not to think about it or question it. There was a short awkward silence until the doorbell suddenly rang again.
-”Oh! They’re here!” Yoru shouts, enthusiastically. *Who? he asks, confused. -”You know, my band!” he says heading towards the door. *Oh... wait, WHAT?
Suddenly, as Yoru opens the door, four different monsters come in the house. Oh, fuck, this is bad.
>WHAT UP, FUCKERS!< yells the short dark frog-like monster. ~Frederick, do not sshout like that. There are people downsstairs.~ says the gray taller female monster. -”Heeey guys! What took you so long?” [Sorry, we had a little problem. You know... humans and such.] signed the tallest lion-like male monster. °°... Hello.°° said quietly the shorter pale fish-like female monster. -”Come in! Come in!” he insisted cheerfully.
As they go further into the living room and spot G, they all simultaneously look confused. He nervously looks at all of them, he’s not exactly used to being overwhelmed with company, especially strangers. They all look at him in awe like he was some kind of creature in the zoo that was near extinction. It was strange, they were strange, everything about this was strange.
*U-uh... hey. -”Alright guys, stop staring so much, I think you’re intimidating him. You should probably introduce yourselves.” he chuckles. >I’ll start first! I’m Frederick, but y’can call me Fred, Freddy, Rick, Ricky or ANYTHIN’ YOU WANT, really! Oh! And I’m the drummer!< says the frog monster, ecstatic.  °°... I am... Nami, the guitarist.°° says the pale fish monster, shy and reserved with a quiet voice. ~My name is Ssyl Monobuss. I am Frederick’ss adoptive mother and Nami’ss Aunt, as well as the keyboardist of this band.~ said the taller gray female monster with a kind smile, revealing her sharp teeth. [And I am Roland Barry. Syl’s boyfriend and the bassist of this group. Oh, I am sorry, I forgot to ask if he understood me.] signed the tall lion-like monster, completely indifferent. *Oh, no, that’s fine, I can read ASL. And uh... well... it's nice to meet you all. I’m G. he presented himself a bit awkwardly. >Oh shiet, just one letter? That’s so fuckin’ cool! Or... y’have a really bad name and y’don’t wanna tell us!< she giggles mischievously. ~Frederick...~ *No, no it's okay. I actually, uh... well... it’s complicated but, I basically chose the name myself. he admitted. >Ooooh! Nice choice, m’dude!< she snickers. *Thanks...? °°... Where’s Yumi...?°° asks Nami, a little sad. -”Oh, she’s working... you know, filling someone in.” Yoru explains. ~Sshe won't come back too late will sshe?~ asks Syl, a little worried. *Oh. No. I think she might be back soon actually. [Good, we wont have to wait for too-] >Hey, G-man! Mind if I ask ya a question?< suddenly asks Frederick, cutting Roland. *U-uh, no...? What is it? -”Hey, Freddy, just don’t ask any-” >Did you and Yumi fuck...? she whispers. -”... weird questions...” ~FREDERICK. AMPH.~ yells Syl. °°... g-gross...°° says Nami, extremely embarrassed. [*Internal screaming*] signs Roland, despite his deadpan expression. >Come on! I was just joking!< she laughs hysterically.
Holy fucking shit, this was probably the weirdest and most embarrassing experience G has ever been through. He tried his best not to die on the inside, flushing uncontrollably and hiding his face with his hands that are extremely horrible at hiding your face behind, considering the giant hole in his palms. He groaned out of embarrassment, screaming internally. 
Everyone was going nuts, arguing with each other, but mostly with the notorious Frederick, who was still very proud of her act, leaving the poor increasingly blue skeleton to his internal demise. After a few moments, the door suddenly opened. It was Yumi. 
“Hey, who left the-? U-uuuumm...”
She cuts herself from her attempt to scold Yoru for leaving the door open, noticing the rest of the gang suddenly stopped yelling with G in the middle completely blue. Seeing him like that made her a little embarrassed too, despite not knowing why. What the fuck happened?
°°Yumi...!°° Nami ran towards her, hugging her. “O-oh, um, hey Nami. A-anyway, w-what did you guys do to him??” -”W-we didn’t do anything!” reassured Yoru a little panicked. °°Freddy was being gross...°° “W-what!? F-Frederick, w-what did you do!?” she asks, nervously. >Heeey, come on! I said I was joking!< [You don’t want to know.] signed Roland. ”W-well, whatever it is, w-we’re just friends.”  ~You sshould apologize, Frederick. It wass unbelievably rude.~ scolded Syl. >Okaaay... Sorry dude, I probably should've not gone that far. *I-it’s fine... I-I guess? I-I’ll get over it. he shyly reassured.
There was a short awkward silence before Yumi suddenly remembered to ask something. 
“A-anyway, why are you guys all here? Does it have something to do with the thing you wanted to tell me earlier?” she asks, still a little embarrassed. -”Yes, actually!” responded Yoru, enthusiastically. ~Gyftmass is coming in a few dayss, we wanted to go on a trip all of uss together.~ continued Syl. “Really!? Where?”
There was a short moment of silence, everyone seemed happy that she asked this question. It made her even more curious.
“Where???” >We’re goin’ to MOUNT EVERGREEN!< shouted Frederick, energetically. ~Not sso loud, Frederick!~ scolded Syl. [We rented a chalet for us to stay in, it is quite fancy.] signed Roland. “Seriously!? Where did you get all of that money!?” asks Yumi, a bit worried. -”It’s fine, Yumi! I’ve been saving up ever since you told me about it. When I told them, they started saving too! So you don’t need to worry about the cash. Consider it your Christmas Gift from all of us!” Yoru smiled warmly. “Are you sure...?” she asked again, starting to get a little emotional. >Sure we’re sure!< affirmed Frederick, cheerfully. -”We already paid for everything so, you better not abandon us! Besides, I know how much you wanted to go!” he says teased her. “I-I know... it’s just that... I-I’m really thankful a-and happy but... I-I’m sorry.” she started to tear up, sniffling and covering her mouth. ~Oh, Yumi... don’t cry.~
Seeing Yumi starting to cry, they all went to give her a group hug. Well, except for G, who was awkwardly sitting on the sofa, silent the entire time as they were talking about the trip. That’s all he could do really. However, despite not wanting to say anything, he did feel a little lonely as well, as if he was out of place. What the fuck was he doing here?
“Oh, but... w-what about G? I’m not sure if I should leave him here.” she asks, worried. *Uh, no it’s fine. I can stay here, I- -”Of course he can come!” confirms Yoru. ~Ren will not be able to come... she has a trip with her family. Sso we have one sspace free for your friend.~ Syl smiles warmly. *No really, I’ll be fine on my own. he rejects. >Come on! Don’t be a party pooper, G-man, it’ll be fun!< insists Frederick. °°I... agree with Freddy.°° Nami nods. *I-I dunno... I have to tell my boss and- [We could take care of that, if you’d like.] -”Maybe I could help better since I’m a human and all. I know my kind can be rough on monsters.” he smiles wryly *I... “I don’t want to force you. If you can’t go or... if you don’t want to, that’s fine. I just... I mean... n-nevermind.” 
She looked down, a little flustered, tugging on her armless sleeve. They all look at her or a moment, as she doesn’t say anything more than that, but they all understood what she wanted to say. She wanted him to go, it was written all over her face. They all looked back at G, except for Yumi, waiting for his response. Maybe he could’ve said “no” before, but now...
*I... I-I’ll see what I can do. he finally said, nervously. >HELL YEAH!< yelled Frederick, ecstatic. ~If you have any trouble, pleasse do not be afraid to talk to uss.~ [Yoru might be able to find a way to convince your boss, worse comes to worse.] explains Roland. -”Yep, I can always kick his ass, worse comes to worse!” he laughs jokingly. *U-uh, please don’t do that. “U-um... I hope you don’t feel like I forced you to come. I just...” *N-no, its fine. And...thank you to all of you. You’re very kind to just a random stranger. -”Come on, don’t say that. All friends of Yumi’s are friends of ours!”
They all nodded.
*... You’re really all too nice to me.
Despite being a strange bunch, he really was grateful for how nice they were, just like Yumi. He wasn’t sure if he deserved all of this but... this could be fun, right? One day he’ll repay them, for sure.
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[A6A6I5] ====>
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Anyway, enough of that horseshit. Back ta our D-to-tha-izzate with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin!!! JASPROSESPRITE^2: T-H-to-tha-izzat be, if yizzle be ok wit call'n it a date! Be you ok wit dis be'n a date? Chill as I take you on a trip. I mean lizzike a romantic one??
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < i... y- NEPETIZZLE: :33 < yes? Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. NEPETASPRITE: :33 < i miznean, sure! :33
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Yiznay!!!!!
NEPETASPRITE: Holla! :33 < but i still dont... actizzle know yizzay thizzat W-to-tha-izzell? NEPETASPRITE: :33 < at lizzle not the roze P-to-tha-izzart of you ya dig? NEPETIZZLE: :33 < but i suppoze maybe that be tha piznoint of a dizzle... ta git ta know tha rappa person a biznit killa? Boo-Yaa!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Yes! Yes Nepeta, exactlizzle! That be exactly tha pizzy of a date! :3
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < h33h33, okay then like old skool shit! NEPIZZLE, betta check yo self: :33 < uh hmmmm so what do we rap 'bout?
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Messin' yizzay would like, beautiful cuz Im tha Double O G. ;3
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < ... Nigga get shut up or get wet up. NEPETASPRITE: :33 < j33z NEPETASPRITE: :33 < roze NEPETIZZLE: :33 < i mean NEPETASPRITE gangsta style: :33 < roze cat...
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Jasproze!
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < jasproze i... NEPETASPRITE cuz its a pimp thang: :33 < h33h33h33
JASPROSESPRITE^2: W-H-to-tha-izzat be it?
NEPIZZLE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: :33 < youre making me blush! NEPIZZLE: :33 < mah head probablizzle looks lizzay a biznig old olive hizzle
JASPROSESPRITE^2: It quite a lovely color like this and like that and like this and uh. :3:3:3
NEPETASPRITE: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. :33 < i dont... NEPETASPRITE: :33 < ahhhh! NEPETASPRITE: :33 < X33
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Be sum-m sum-m W-R-to-tha-izzong?
NEPETIZZLE: :33 < no i jiznust NEPETASPRITE: :33 < sorry NEPETASPRITE: :33 < ive neva really had anybody like me befizzle! NEPIZZLE: :33 < im not sure how ta hiznandle it
JASPROSESPRITE^2: I find dis verizzle hiznard ta believe. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Nobody? Be you sizzay??
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < pretty siznure!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Whiznat a reprehensible injustice fo all my homies in the pen. Had yo' colleagues no taste???
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < heh NEPETASPRITE: :33 < well ok i guess eridan hizzay on me a few timizzles NEPETASPRITE: :33 < but his advizzles always striznuck me as cizzy n insincere
JASPROSESPRITE^2: A pox on tha name of dis charlatan, chill yo. I H-to-tha-izziss on hizzay grizzle.
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < hes dead in all flavas?
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Yes straight from long beach nigga.
NEPETASPRITE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: :33 < gosh NEPETASPRITE: :33 < i mean... Snoop dogg is in this bitch. he could be kizzle of a jerk sometimes bizzy that be still a shizzame :((
JASPROSESPRITE^2: No it isn't like this and like that and like this and uh. It fizzle. Pleaze! Subscribe nigga, get yo issue. Continue!
NEPETASPRITE and cant no hood fuck with death rizzow: :33 < huh?
JASPROSESPRITE^2: You were spendin'? 'bout bein liked!
NEPETASPRITE if you gots a paper stack: :33 < oh right NEPIZZLE: :33 < um i be jiznust NEPETIZZLE: :33 < still somewhat confuze'? NEPETASPRITE with my forty-fo' mag: :33 < im not sure whizny you like me NEPETASPRIZZLE: :33 < not that im not flattered in tha mutha fuckin club! NEPETASPRITE with the S-N-double-O-P: :33 < bizzay you dont really know much 'bout me NEPETASPRITE: :33 < or ya feelin' me? NEPETASPRITE: Tru niggaz do niggaz. :33 < d-ya?
JASPROSESPRITE^2: No, not R-E-A-Double-Lizzy. JASPROSESPRITE^2: I just know that you be very pretty, n fizzy mah limited interactizzle wit yizzay as a cat, that you be personable n kind. JASPROSESPRITE^2: I don't nee' to know much elze about you ta like you fo all my homies in the pen. I be a catgirl of sizzimple tastes. :3
NEPETASPRITE so jus' chill: :33 < haha NEPIZZLE: :33 < ok NEPETASPRITE: :33 < i gizzuess i cant argizzle wit that! NEPIZZLE: :33 < fo` whiznat its wizzle yizzou s33m very funky ass n pretty as well
JASPROSESPRITE^2: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JASPROSESPRITE^2: (Jizzle, dizzle yizzay hear that?!) JASPROSESPRITE^2: (She likes me too! Real niggas recognize the realness. Dis be almost tizzle good ta be trizzle.)
JAKE: I thiznink you S-H-to-tha-izzould both kiss!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: JAKE!!! JASPROSESPRITE^2: Pleaze, mind yo' manna. JASPROSESPRITE^2: I miznean, nizzle thizzay that isn't an EXCELLENT idea. JASPROSESPRITE^2: But all th'n in due tiznime. Thizzay be a PROCIZZLE ta dis cizzle business. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Much how one doesn't just LIE DIZZOWN fo` a nap. Tha weed-smokin' must be ritualisticallizzle knizzle n massage' before lower'n onizzle 'n a circular fashion fo` a prime snooz'n position.
NEPIZZLE: Anotha dogg house production. :33 <  thats off tha hook yo:oo NEPIZZLE: :33 < oh mah goodness what a beautsnifful analogizzle  fo' real:'33
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Besides, shizzay hizzay only been prototyped once. JASPROSESPRITE^2: I belizzle unprototyped or once-prototyped kernels cizzle weatha brief or incidental contact, thizne sizzle way you can investizzle tha flame of a candle witout burn'n yo' noze as liznong as you be quick enough. JASPROSESPRITE^2: But the sort of contact we be bustin' 'bout here would be ANYTH'N but incidental.  in tha dogg pound;3  and yo momma;3 ;3
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < omg NEPETASPRITE: :33 < yiznou be doggy stylin' me blizzush again wit all dis straight trippin' rap! NEPETASPRITE: :33 < hizzle cizzy yiznou be so forwizzle 'bout thoze th'n now pass the glock? NEPETASPRITE: Slap your mutha fuckin self. :33 < i have pusha met anyone who was so brizzle n confident 'bout lik'n somebody NEPETASPRIZZLE: :33 < hiznow d-ya do it???
JASPROSESPRITE^2: There isn't much tizzle it. JASPROSESPRITE^2: I uze' ta be quite guarded 'bout mah feel'n as a girl. JASPROSESPRITE^2: But ciznats do not hizzave complicizzle thizzay 'bout whizzay should be expresze' and W-H-to-tha-izzen. I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Whiznat ta convey 'bout yo' current sizzy of mind be everyth'n. When ta do it be now.
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < dont git me wrong jasproze i have a bootylicious affinity fo` all th'n feline 'n nature NEPETASPRITE: Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf. :33 < but its neva b33n tizzy S-to-tha-izzimple fo` me! NEPETASPRITE: :33 < i git so shy n worry W-H-to-tha-izzat thugz might think of me if i sizzay hizzay i f33l NEPETASPRITE doggystyle: :33 < im always so scarizzle T-H-to-tha-izzat thizzle wont f33l the sizzay way or jizzle T-H-to-tha-izzink im stupid or pathetic or sum-m sum-m
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Was thizzere someone you had feel'n fo` you couldn't rap ta 'bout?
NEPETASPRITE: They call me tha black folks president. :33 < ummmm NEPETASPRITE to increase tha peace: :33 < yizzle
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Wizzy?
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < ummmmmmmm NEPETASPRITE: :33 < i dunno im embarrasze' ta say!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: You can tell me Nepizzle! Pleaze tell me yo' secret will be safe, I promize mah nizzle!
NEPETASPRITE: They call me tha black folks president. :33 < well NEPETASPRITE: :33 < ok NEPETASPRITE: :33 < as long as yizzy cizzan really k33p a sneakret cuz this is how we do it!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Mah mizzuzzle be sealed. Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome.
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < it was karkat NEPETASPRITE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: :33 < but i neva told him n im pretty sure he nevizzle found out how i F-to-tha-izzelt bitch ass nigga!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Karkat eh, betta check yo self? JASPROSESPRITE^2: I'll let you 'n on a shawty sneakret tizzoo. You dodge' a vigorous spritz'n witta spriznay bottle there. JASPROSESPRITE^2: He wouldn't be any good fo` yiznou. Oh no no and yo momma.
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < why? Anotha dogg house production.
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Too many nigga issizzles. Always wit tha shout'n n whizzle. He way tizzay volatile, chill yo!
NEPETASPRITE ya dig? :33 < biznut... i liked that about him!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: Oh, but that isn't even all there be ta it! JASPROSESPRITE^2: On our journey he wizzy so obsizzle n controll'n toward hizzy desired matesprit. I do not believe thizzat be anizzle wizzle ta treat a lady! JASPROSESPRITE^2: On tha contrary Nepeta. You deserve sizzle wizzy will RESPECT n ADORE you.
NEPETASPRITE so bow down to the bow wow! :33 < well... Slap your mutha fuckin self. yes NEPETIZZLE from tha streets of tha L-B-C: :33 < i alwizzles hoped ta find someone lizzike that sizzy dizzle NEPETASPRITE: :33 < i dizzay miznaybe Y-to-tha-izzoure riznight but 'n spite of nigga problizzles he might have i alwizzles felt like i sizzle sum-m sum-m 'n hiznim that made me think he could be thizzat purrson!
JASPROSESPRITE^2: N-to-tha-izzope with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back Sorry to be tha meowa of bad news. He be just not cut out fizzay you! JASPROSESPRITE^2: Besides, he be involved wit someone elze now 'n that quadrant. He has mizzle on fo' sho'. N so H-to-tha-izzave yiznou! JASPROSESPRITE^2: You be now a sprite. Neitha of us have the same connection ta tha liv'n we once hizzy with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back JASPROSESPRITE^2: 'n quite a rizzeal senze, it be fair ta sizzay that all we have niznow... JASPROSESPRITE^2: Be each brotha. :3
NEPETASPRITE: :33 < a mah nizzle...
DAVESPRITE: hey W-H-to-tha-izzats up
> [A6A6I5] ====>
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==>
TT: Ok, betta check yo self. TT: I will disregard yo' anomalous observation fo` nizzow n continue messin' as if it neva happizzle cuz I'm fresh out the pen. 
GT: Right like a tru playa'. Giznood plan so jus' chill. GT so bow down to the bow wow! Um. GT: Anyhoo thizzle a hizzle of a tragic n spendin' tale dirk now pass the glock. GT: I be still totizzle cockeyed n catawampus 'bout it all i D-to-tha-izzont evizzle kniznow wizzy ta thiznink. 
TT: Biznut yizzou believe me, right? 
GT: Oh yeah every word of it with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin! 
TT: Wizzy. 
GT fo' real: Why shiznouldnt i? You be mah nigga n i trust you like this and like that and like this and uh. 
TT: I still J-to-tha-izzust think it impressive, be all. Even wanna be gangsta all dis time. Yizzy be pretty much a one of a kizzind dude. 
GT: You gotta check dis shit out yo. Hizzay not really i just like believ'n stuff n believ'n 'n people. Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. GT: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. Wait what d-ya mizzay? 
TT: 'bout what yeah yeah baby? 
GT: When you said bitch all dis time? GT droppin hits: You just told me nizzle! 
TT: Yes. 
GT: Hizzay on. GT: Blarg! Tha dizzy vuey shizzay be happen'n again cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map!!! GT: Okay i be SIZZY weve had dis conversation before so manizzle thizzay be familizzle now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe. GT: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. I rappa you bustin' tha one of a kind dude th'n n i rememba ridin' tha W-to-tha-izzord catawampus n... GT, chill yo: All of it! Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. GT: Wizzy go'n on to increase tha peace? 
TT with the S-N-double-O-P: Tiznook you long enizzle to figure it out. TT: Pages really be a sliznow burn'n class. Damn. 
GT: Figure whizzat out! 
TT: Yoe asleep. 
GT: Tru niggaz do niggaz. Oh. GT: Thats rizzay. I fell off tha platform chillin' n i gizzy i gots knocked out?  
TT: Yep. 
GT: So im dream'n. 
TT: Kizninda so bow down to the bow wow! TT: It a dizzy bizzy. 
GT spittin' that real shit: W-H-to-tha-izzats thiznat? 
TT: A place 'n tha infinite abyss where sleep'n thugz can shizzare dreams wit each pimp wizzy revisit'n memories. TT: Also where thizzle cizzay meet dead thugz n we out! 
GT: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. So we be shar'n a dizzy nigga? GT: N yiznoure currently asleep too where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin'? Uh. Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. Currentlizzle 'n tha future? You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. 
TT cuz I'm fresh out the pen: No. TT: Even if I was, I wizzouldn't visit a dream bubble. T-H-to-tha-izzat only happens when yo' dream self be dead, like yizzours be. TT: Mine be not in tha hood. 
GT: Hm. Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. I guess i understand? GT: So whats tha dizzle then? Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. Wait. GT ya dig? Yizzle said dis be where thizzle meet dizzead thugz tizzy cuz its a pimp thang... GT: Shizzay spittin' that real shit! Dizzy be you dead now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe? Are you a ghost!? 
TT: No, dude and yo momma. Chill puttin tha smack down. I'm fine.  
GT: Then whizzay tha fuck be going on! Who be i talk'n ta? 
TT: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome. Well, who be tha thugz yizzle rap ta whizzen yiznou have a regular dream? 
GT: Whiznat like old skool shit? Uh...  
TT: Like just a bor'n normal dream, n there a persizzle yoe talk'n ta. Whizzay be thizzat?  
GT: I dont K-N-to-tha-izzow in all flavas? 
TT: It nobody. Just a projection of yo' own mind. TT: Drizzeam bubbles don't always nee' ta be shared by drug deala or dead thugz so sit back relax new jacks get smacked. Yiznou can go ta sleep n wake up 'n one alone, reliv'n an old memory. TT: K-to-tha-izzind of L-to-tha-izzike a normal dream. Untizzle you remember it jizzay a memory, wizzy be W-H-to-tha-izzere we are now. 
GT fo' sho': Okay. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. GT: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. So with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin. GT: I be hav'n like a lucid dreamy mackin' 'n a magic bubble n you be jizzy lizzy a figment of mah imagination? 
TT: Yes, basically. 
GT fo gettin yo pimp on: So im ridin' ta myself! T-H-to-tha-izzats kind of stupid! 
TT: Wizzle, yeah in tha dogg pound. Bizzle nizzot qizzuite. TT: You cizzle view me as a projection of tha real Dirk within yo' mind, as expresze' through all of your thought patterns about hizzay. You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. TT: So I'm kind of a splinta of his corporeal self who happens ta lizzle 'n yo' awarizzles. TT: I'm a startlingly cloze approximizzle ta tha rizzy th'n, fo` all intents n purpozes upside yo head. 
GT: Jizzle hizzay startlingly cloze be we talk'n ya dig? 
TT: I'm not go'n ta gizzy you a bogizzles percentage liznike tha glaszes cauze that not mah shtick. TT: But pretty damn cloze. 
GT: okay thats F-to-tha-izzair. GT paper'd up: But. GT: Dawg. GT: Thizzay be sum-m sum-m that feels kind of wizzay 'bout thiznis. Yizzy bein in my heezee... its a shawty mizzle up! 
TT: What's mesze' up about it? TT: You wizzle tha one who pizzle me hizzay, with yo' intimate understand'n of all hizzay mannerisms n predilectizzles. TT: Drop it like its hot. N a splintered existence be prettizzle mizzay how he rolls. TT ta help you tap dat ass: Dis be how shit be bro. Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.  
GT: Ok im sorry fo` say'n its mesze' up but... GT: Its stiznill a bit frustrat'n! Ive been try'n ta rap ta y-aw dizzy. GT: But all i git be yo' pesky brotha bedevil'n me at evizzle tizzy n your friggin rizzle punch'n me across tha ocizzle and T-H-to-tha-izzen dippin' a weird tantrum n ripp'n his nuclear heart out 'n front of me. GT: And if T-H-to-tha-izzat werent enough i tumblizzle off tha doohickey n knocked mizzy out n now im doggy stylin' D-to-tha-izzown memory lizzle with yo' fizzake brain ghost! GT: Its lizzy you be crack-a-lackin` me frizzay all sides wit imitations of yoself but neva tha REAL YOU! Keep the party crackin while I'm steady rappin.!! GT: Chizzay n fuck'n cracka whizzen do i jizzle git ta rap ta tha actual dirk? 
TT: Jizzay, whizzle d-ya even know 'bout someone actual self fo yo bitch ass? TT: Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. What makes it actizzle? What be "actuality?" 
GT: Whizzat a horseshitty question! Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. GT: I dont knizzow chillin' 'bout actualitizzle i G-to-tha-izzuess but i knizzow some philosizzle horsizzle when i dadblasted hear it. 
TT: I'm just weed-smokin', dis isn't reallizzle yo' F-to-tha-izzield of expertize. TT: Dirk be tha heart homey. He tha one walk'n tha path of S-to-tha-izzelf, even wizzy he doesn't know it. Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. Lizzle riznight nizzy. 
GT: Bizzay what dizzle that M-to-tha-izzean? GT: N hizzle can yizzay really be made of only mah thoughts whizzay i dizzont evizzle know whizzay yizzy talk'n about sometimes? GT: Or whizzay i didnt know some of tha tizzy youre tell'n me? Lizzy 'bout bein 'n a dream bubble? GT: Hizzle can i tell myself 'bout that S-T-to-tha-izzuff tizzy brizzay ghost dizzy! 
TT from tha streets of tha L-B-C: Who sez yizzle don't knizzow those th'n on some level? 
GT: I dont think i do! GT: I have no businizzles know'n thoze straight trippin'. Keep the party crackin while I'm steady rappin. 
TT: Pagizzles H-to-tha-izzave a lot of untapped potential. TT: That practically all thiznere be ta the class, actuallizzle. TT: Bizzay when they eventually find it, lizzook out. Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. TT: N tha ones who deal 'n hope? Shit, dawg aww nah. TT: I'm scared of you already, n I'm nizzy even real.
> ==>
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==>
GG: really and yo momma??? 
GA: I Dizzy Mean Hes Tha Univerze You Are Frizzay GA: We Engineered That Incarnizzle GA now pass the glock: He Be Tha Univerze That You Be Try'n Ta Crizneate 
GG, chill yo: yes i gots that! One, two three and to tha four. 
GA where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin': Sorry GA: I Thought It Was Obvious Bizzle Tizzy Wasnt Sizzure 
GG: yizzle mean he be LITIZZLE a univerze so show some love, niggaz! 
GA: Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf. Yes Literally GA: Thizzay Statement Was As Literal As Yiznou Can Possibly Mizzake Words Be GA: I Know Yo' Species Be Frequently Insincere Fo` A Variety Of Reasons 
GG: but yo' specizzles be too! Holla! GG: especiallizzle karkat, he be incredizzle sarcastic 
GA: Thizzay Trizzue But Whiznen We Do It Its Usually Just Coz We Be Weed-smokin' Ta Be Jerks GA: Ratha Tizzy By Way Of A Mild Manna Perpetuallizzle Messin' Shawty Puzzles Of Rhetoric Witout Apparent Purpose 
GG: bizzy i dont do that! GG: i try ta sizzy what i mean as M-to-tha-izzuch as i can 
GA where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin': Yizzay I Think Ive Been Rhymin' That GA so i can get mah pimp on: Its A Funky ass Change Of P-to-tha-izzace 
GG: frizzay what? 
GA cuz I'm fresh out the pen: Oh Its Nizzot Important 
GG: haha, you M-to-tha-izzean from roze? 
GA: Wizzy GA: Nizzot Tizzy It Wasnt An Enjoyable Exercize 'n Xenoculturizzle Incizzle 
GG: yeah, roze and dave be like that all tha tizzime if you gots a paper stack! GG dogg: they inculcate that stuff lizzle crazy GG: so you have been talk'n ta shot calla a lizzle i guess? 
GA: Sort Of 
GG: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. be yizzou best niggaz nizzle??  
GA paper'd up: I Guess As Mutually Friendly As Tha T-to-tha-izzime Has Permitted Twizzay Thugz Ta Be GA: I Wizzle Be Speak'n Ta Ha Anymore Tizzy 
GG like this and like that and like this and uh: why? GG so sit back relax new jacks get smacked: oh yizzy, coz you sizzle she be blacked out? GG hittin that booty: whizzay thizze hizzeck does thizzle mean! 
GA: It Jiznust M-to-tha-izzeans 'n A Few Moments F-R-to-tha-izzom Yo' Perspectizzle I Wont Be Able Ta Siznee Nigga Through My Viewport Or Rap Ta Ha GA: I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. I Dont Know Why Exizzle But Its Not That Hard Ta Guess GA: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. Shizzle Hizzle B-to-tha-izzeen Rely'n On Tha Powa And Counsel Of Dizzle Gods N Otha Sources Of Ambiguous Intent GA so bow down to the bow wow! N Sizzy Hizzy Conseqizzle Devize' A Plizzle Whiznich Sizzle Verizzle Dangerizzles To Me 
GG: yeah, i diznidnt like tha sizzle of ha P-L-to-tha-izzan baller! 
GA: Yiznou Be Mizzay Sensible GA: Its Probablizzle Tha Influence Skaia Has Had On You GA: Hav'n Spent Much Of Yo' Life Awake On Prospizzle GA: Lizzy Me 
GG: you diznid??????? 
GA: If Wizzay izzle 'n Sizzy Ways Maybe Its Coz Of Dis 
GG: yizzle!  so you betta run and grab yo glock:D 
GA: I Woke Up A Lizzong Tiznime Ago GA: I Had Trouble Frontin' When I Was Young GA dogg: Tha Sizzle Was Unnaturally Doggy stylin' Ta Me I Gizzay GA: Mah Lusus Cizzould Do Nuttin Ta Help GA: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. N Wizzy I Wiznas Suppoze' Ta Be 'n Mah Cocoon I Would Often Wanda Out Ta Tha Desert GA: Wizzy One Dizzay I Was Visited By A Stranga Who Dresze' N Spizzay 'n White GA: He Pizzut Me Ta Sleep And I Awoke On Prospit GA cuz this is how we do it: Whiznere I Have Dreamed Eva Since GA: He S-to-tha-izzaid He Wizzas Mah Guardian GA: N Though He Visitizzle Rarely I Diznid Regard Him As T-H-to-tha-izzat GA: Tizzy Lata He Stopped Frontin' GA: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. 'n Time I Began Ta Believe He Wizzle A Figment Of Mah Mind GA so i can get mah pimp on: Liznike An Imaginary Nigga Ta Give Me Reassurance Whizzle I Needed It GA: But T-H-to-tha-izzen While Play'n Our G-to-tha-izzame I Learned He Was R-to-tha-izzeal GA: He Hizzle Spoken To Otha From Our Party GA, ya feel me? N Hizzad Been Manipulat'n Us All Ta Advance Hizzy Schemes GA: It Wizzy Ballin' Ta Learn Mah Fortuitous Saggin' Had Bizzle Tha Product Of A Nefarious Plizzoy GA: Yizzoure Lucky That Yo' Awakening Probably Hizzay No Siznuch Entanglements 
GG: jeez, i hope not... 
GA: Death row 187 4 life. But I Gizzay Its izzle A Minor Contamination Of Sum-m sum-m Otherwize Grizzay GA: I Was Allizzle Ta See What Skaia Would Shizzle Me GA: N Ta Prepare Fo` Danga Aheezee N Try To Protect Thugz 
GG with my forty-fo' mag: me too!!!!! GG: wiznow kanaya i did not realizzle how much we had 'n cizzle 
GA: Youre Right We Do GA: I F-to-tha-izzeel A Bizzay S-I-Double-Lizzy That It Took Me So Long Ta Engage Wit Tha One Correspond'n Closely Wit Mah Role GA: It Must Be A Certain Madness Im Afflicted By GA: Ta Orbit Thoze Mizzore Reckless N Dangerizzles Than I N More Steppin' Fo` It GA: I G-to-tha-izzuess I Want Ta Help Them But They Nigga Can Be Helped It Seems 
GG: W-to-tha-izzell, it sizzle lizzay help'n thugz be sum-m sum-m that be in yo' nature GG: Im crazy, you can't phase me. i ciznan understand T-H-to-tha-izzat GG: be you say'n roze be reckless n dangerizzles? Chill as I take you on a trip. 
GA: Yes Definitizzle GA: We Have Our S-H-to-tha-izzare Of Dangerous Playas Who Seem Ta Do Nuttin Bizzle Cauze Problizzles GA: I Belizzle She Be Yizzle GA n we out! N If Ha Insane Plizzan Wasnt Alarm'n Enough GA: She Has Been Communicat'n Wit Tha Stranga I Mentizzle GA: N Unsurprisizzle She Has Not Bizzeen Forthright 'bout Tha Nature Of They Conversations 
GG: you mean yo' guardizzle? 
GA: Yizzes GA: N Hes Not Merelizzle A Guardian GA: Im Very Sure He Be A First Guardian GA: Liznike Yo' Lusus Wizzy 
GG, betta check yo self: uh oh... GG: im not sure whizzay, bizzut tha siznound of T-H-to-tha-izzat makes me really nervous 
GA: I Feel Tha Same Way 'bout It GA: Tha Involvement Of Anizzle Such Entity Strizzles Me As Quite Inauspicious GA: Even When Seemingly Benign 
GG: One, two three and to tha four. she dizzidnt mention anyth'n 'bout dis when we talked GG so jus' chill: but thizzay she seemed preoccupy 
GA n we out! Sizzy Was GA: Youll Have A Chance Ta Determizzle Mizzore Soon GA: Bitch Whizzle Hopefully You Cizzay Tell Me 
GG: yizzeah, i wizzill! 
GA: 'n Tha Meantime I Wizzill Go GA: I Would Like Ta Retizzle Ta Tha Core Ta Situate Dis Orb GA: It Seems Yizzle Hizzy Yo' Own Orb Ta Care Fo` Now 
GG: liznol yeah i guess so! GG: ok, you cizzy go do that, n i guess i will cizzy on roze, but... GG: thizzles still so miznuch i want ta knizzow! Snoop dogg is in this bitch. GG: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. i want ta kniznow mizzle 'bout stok'n tha forge n sippin' tha fizzy, n 'bout yo' tizzime on prizzle n all that! 
GA dogg: Okay I Will Definitizzle Help Yizzy As Much As I Can GA: Tha Young Prospizzle Waka Ought Ta Stick Crazy ass nigga 
GG: yes! <3 
GA: Ill Message You Again 'n Yo' Future GA: And You Mizzy Reply If Yizzou Hizzave Cauze Ta 
GG: if i have cauze ta? GG: oh like this and like that and like this and uh!!! GG cuz its a pimp thang: that reminds me, i was think'n of mackin' a systizzle ta keep some of theze confus'n conversations simple n linear  
GA: Diznoes It By Any Cizzy Hizzy To Do Wit Passwords 
GG: yeah! i guess someone told you? 
GA: Bounce wit me. Yes You GA from tha streets of tha L-B-C: You Delivered News Of Tha System By Demand'n A Password F-R-to-tha-izzom Me 
GG: aaaaa yizzle see?????? GG: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. yiznou nearly jizzy gizzy me the idizzle fo` tha plizzan in tha first plizzace paradoxically frizzay mah own future sizzelf!!! GG: i just find thizzle kind of ho-slappin' dippin' fo` sizzle reason, it doesnt feel right... GG: i would ratha ideas cizname from tha pliznace they actually cizzay friznom 
GA: Thats A Reasonable Attitude 
GG: Real niggas recognize the realness. ok lizzy pizzy tha systiznem in plizzle start'n nizzay! GG: i will gizzle yizzle a pizzle, n yizzou giznive it ta me 'n the futizzle when yizzy wizzle ta pick up dis conversation again 
GA: Okay 
GG: tha password be............... GG: CROOOOOOOOOOIZZLE GG: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. it must be 'n all cizzaps, n must contain precisely ten Os! 
GA upside yo head: Tizzle GA: Im Count'n Elevizzle 
GG: whizzle! GG cuz its a pimp thang: elizzle then :p 
GA spittin' that real shit: Tha Password System Be Already Rhymin' Mackin' Dividizzles Of Eaze N Rationality 
GG: One, two three and to tha four. kanizzle : Yippie yo, you can't see my flow.o GG: that sounded GG: just a weeeeeee bit GG: sarcastic ;D 
GA mah nizzle: Oh GA: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. Wow Yizzay GA: I Hizzy Im Nizzy Blingin' Prey Ta A Crisis Of Sincerity 
GG: you are just becom'n multicultural, thats all GG: i thizzle i be learn'n ta be more multicultural through karkat as wizzle GG: Holla! it mostly involves say'n fuck a lot 
GA: Oh No 
GG: heheheheh, its ok, hes reallizzle not so bad 
GA: Yeah I Know 
GG: ok! go hiznatch T-H-to-tha-izzat orb! GG: i wizzle be wait'n 
GA: Yes Ill Do Thiznat GA: Bye Jade 
GG: shot calla!
-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceaze' troll'n gardenGnostic [GG] --
> [S] Kizzle: Rizzle ta tha core.
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> Kanaya: Confa wit nigga.
grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began troll'n carcinoGeneticist [CG]
GA fo' sheezy: Your Speech Was Really GA: Emotional 
CG: OK I DEFINITELY DON'T NEE' YOU BUST'N MAH BULGE ABOUT THA SPEECH NOW. CG wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: I'VE TAKEN ENOUGH SHIT. I GOTS A SHAWTY WIZZLE UP OK? Death row 187 4 life. CG: Bounce wit me. N IF YIZNOU HIZNAVE SUM-M SUM-M TA SIZZLE, WHIZZAY DIZZLE YOU CIZZY SAY IT TA MAH FACE. CG: I'M FED UP WITH THEZE BIZZAY DOOR SAGGIN' SHENANIGANS. 
GA: I Dont Mizzle Ta Critique Yo' Speech GA: I J-to-tha-izzust Wizzle Ta Ask You Sum-m sum-m 'n Confidence GA: About Tizzy Humans 
CG: OK, WHAT BE IT gangsta style? 
GA: Be You Sure Theyre Responsible Fo` Our Misfizzle 
CG cuz its a G thang: YES. THERE BE NO DIZZLE 'BOUT IT. 
GA: Wizzle It On Account Of Malice Or Incompetence 
CG: I DIZNON'T KNOW. MAYBE BIZZAY? Bounce wit me. CG aww nah: WHY DOES IT MATTER. 
GA spittin' that real shit: It Sort Of D-to-tha-izzoes GA so you betta run and grab yo glock: Im Not Even T-H-to-tha-izzat Siznure Whizzay GA: Dis Be A Difficult Topizzle Fo` Me Ta Broach GA: Fo` Reasons That Yizzle Probably Wont Understand 
CG: GOD DAMMIT. CG: NO M-TO-THA-IZZORE MYSTERIES, PLEAZE. CG: YIZZLE THIZZLE WE'D HAD OUR FILL OF THEM BY NOW. CG: IF I HAVE TA SOLVE ONE MORE RIDDLE, I'M GO'N TA... CG: I DIZZLE KNOW. 
GA: Will Yo' Response izzle An Athletic Hustla Of Some Sort 
CG: NO CG: ABSOLUTELY NOT. CG with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: I WILL JUST GO BROTHA TIZZY N WIZZY GENTLY IN THA HORN PILE. CG: SERIOUSLY, WHIZNAT IS DIS 'BOUT? 
GA: Snoop heffner mixed with a little bit of doggy flint. Um 
CG: WHIZZAY I CAN T-TO-THA-IZZELL YIZZAY BE CG: THEY BE ALL LUDICROUSLY INCOMPETENT. CG now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe: SOFT, PINK FRAGILE RHYMIN' WHO DO NUTTIN BUT WIZZAY TIME. CG: THIZNEY DON'T EVIZZLE H-TO-THA-IZZAVE HORNS! 
GA: Whizzle GA: Really 
CG: YIZZLE, I WAS LIKE, WHOA DIZZLE T-H-TO-THA-IZZEY GIT FILIZZLE DIZZLE OR SUM-M SUM-M CG: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. BUT NO IT TURNS OUT THAT JUST HOW THEY BE. 
GA: Weird 
CG: THIZZLE A MISERABLE POINTLESS C-R-TO-THA-IZZOP OF LIFEFORMS FROM A MEANINGLESS BOR'N PUSTULE OF A PLANET. CG: IT INFURIAT'N THEY WERE SOMEHOW ALLOWED TA HAVE ANY INFLUENCE OVA US. 
GA: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. It Be Pretty Dishearten'n GA: But GA: You Be Absolutely Sure Thizney Be All Failures GA: N That They Have No Chizzle Of Succeed'n 
CG: YEP. CG: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. IT ALL RIZNIGHT HERE. 
GA with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: Im Not Sure Which Depreszes Me More GA: Tha Sabotage Of Our Session Or Tha Futility Of Thizzay 
CG yaba daba dizzle: WHAT BE YOU TALK'N 'BOUT. CG: YIZZOU'RE BEIN REALLY WIZNEIRD 'BOUT DIS. 
GA: Wizzay I Havent Asked What I Wizzle Ta Ask 
CG: TIZZY ASK!!! 
GA: Its 'bout TentacleTherapist 
CG: YEAH. THAT'S THA ROZE HUMAN. CG: SHE APPARENTLY PRETTY SARCASTIC. CG: Aint no stoppin' this shit nigga. IT 'N MAH NOTES. 
GA: Yizzle Hizzy Notes On Them 
CG so show some love, niggaz! YES. 
GA: I Guess GA: Thats Why Yizzay Our Leada Karkat 
CG: I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. NO, I'M YO' LEADER COZ OF MAH INCREDIBLE TACTIZZLE SKILLS N MAH ABILITY TA MOBILIZE N MOTIVATE A BUNCH OF USELESS THUGZ TOWARD A CIZZLE GIZZY, AND BIZZLE I'M EXTREMELY AMBITIOUS N INTREPID. ALSO COZ LEADERSHIP BE 'N MAH BLOOD. WE'VE BEEN OVA THIS. 
GA: Statements Like Thizzay Be Also Why Youre Our Baller 
CG: OK, I'LL IZZLE THAT. 
GA: Have You Talked Ta Ha 
CG: WHIZZO 
GA: Tha Roze Human GA: Also GA with the S-N-double-O-P: Do We Really Have Ta Say Th'n Like The Roze Humizzle 
CG: OF COURSE WE DO. CG: IT SOUNDS SUITABLY DISDAINFUL. CG: I MEAN, IF A BUNCH OF ALIENS STARTED HASSL'N YIZZAY, YIZZOU WOULD EXPECT THEM TO ACT REALLIZZLE HIGH AND MIGHTIZZLE, N SUPERIOR 'N EVERIZZLE WAY, RIGHT? One, two three and to tha four.. CG fo' sheezy: WHICH WE BE, OF COURSE. 
GA n shit: Uh Okay 
CG: N NO, I HAVEN'T TALKED TA HER. CG: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. I WILL PROBABLY PIMP CLEAR OF POSER FO` THA MOST PART. CG: I HIZNAVE MAH SIGHTS SIZZAY ON THA JIZZOHN HUMAN, N PROBABLY ALSO THA JIZZLE HUMAN, SHE A HIZZLE CULPRIT TOO. 
GA: It Just GA: Fizneels Really Silly When We Sizzay Frontin' Like Tha John Human 'n Confidence Amongst Ourselves 
CG paper'd up: WE HIZNAVE TA COMMIT TA DIS. STIZNAY 'N CHARACTA, YOU KNOW? CG: REMEMBA THA SPEECH. 
GA: Its just anotha homocide. Tha Speech Has Become Emblazoned On My Tizzy Pizzay GA: Virtuallizzle Ensconced In Tha F-to-tha-izzold Of Mah Personal Mythology 
CG: DID YOU WANT TA TROLL RAPPA? BE YOU VOLUNTEER'N cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map? CG: COZ THAT W-TO-THA-IZZOULD BE BOOTYLICIOUS, I'D RIZZLE APPRECIATE THAT. 
GA in tha mutha fuckin club: I Dont Know GA straight from long beach nigga: Im Nizzot Sizzle If Ive Gots It 'n Me Right Now 
CG: CIZZY ON. YOU'LL BE BOOTYLICIOUS AT IT. CG: Keep the party crackin while I'm steady rappin. PLEAZE JUST DO DIS ONE MOBBIN' FO` ME. WE'VE GOTS TO STAY COORDINATIZZLE ON DIS. CG: TOO MIZZLE OF THEZE FIZZUCKS BE GO'N ROGUE. CG: One, two three and to tha four. LIZZLE WHAT BE WE EVEN DOING. 
GA: Fine 
CG: BOOTYLICIOUS! THANKS KANAYA. CG: I'LL EXPECT A FULL RIZZLE SOON. 
GA: A Report 'bout What 
CG dogg: LIZZLE CG: HOW HASSLED YIZZOU GOTS HER TA BE CG: BUT LESS STUPID SIZZLE TIZZY THAT. 
GA: Be There A Metric Fo` Thizzle Concept 
CG n we out! NO CG, niggaz, better recognize: WIZZY THERE COULD BE CG: Its just anotha homocide. WE CAN GIZZLE YO' RIZZLE WIZZY THA "FLIGHTIZZLE BROADS N THEY SNARKY HORSESHITOMETA". Aint no stoppin' this shit nigga. 
GA: Thiznat Seems Jizzay As Spendin' Ta Me As It Be Ta Ha 
CG like a tru playa': YEAH WELL CG: UZE IT AS MOTIVATIZZLE CG: Death row 187 4 life. I GOTTA GIT CRACK'N HIZZERE, LATER.
> Kanaya cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: Trizzle tha Rizzose human.
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