#omg i finished revelation space after like a week

[your-averagewriter]

Mistletoe.

Summary: Every year there's a Christmas Dance and this year Nevermore has a little surprise for the students after a slow dance. ((y/n) is a Gorgon and this is (y/n) x Ajax Petropolus).

Word count: 1.2K

Warnings: swearing, monsters/creatures? kissing, drinking

-

Today is exactly a week and two days before Christmas and the Nevermore Christmas party/dance. Everyone’s excited because of the dance and going home as lots do. However, some stay at the Academy for whatever reasons like me, I don’t go home because I don’t really have a home, my parents are shitty and I don’t have anywhere to go so whenever we go home I always stay at the academy with a few others.

The dance starts in a bit over an hour so I start putting on my dress, a flowing, pale blue dress that I’m linking to the theme of Christmas with the colour of ice. When I went shopping a while ago for the dress I picked out a matching pale blue headscarf to cover my snakes. 

Before taking off my usual dark purple one that matches my uniform check the door and my shared room to make sure that Yoko isn’t in it (for safety reasons obviously).

I swiftly take off my original head scarf and place it down, shaking my head I feel my snakes move around in the new space. Running my hand through my snakes I revel in the short moment of freedom before having to switch over my head scarf.

I hear a knock and then the door clicks open and I desperately try to smooth down my snakes and hide them.

“Yoko! Wait!” I yell, grabbing onto the new head scarf. I scramble to tie it on properly as Yoko is halfway in the room.

“(y/n)? Are you okay?” 

“Yeah, one second, Yoko, my snakes are out!” I say loudly, fiddling with the pins and trying to attach it properly. “Okay, you can come in now,” I say patting and feeling my head making sure none of the snakes are free.

“Sorry, (y/n), I should’ve waited.” She says entering the room.

“It’s fine, I just don’t want to freeze you, especially before the party.” I chuckle.

“You look nice, are you nearly ready?” She asks looking at one of our mirrors and checking her hair.

“Nearly,” I say, uncovering the mirror in front of me and adding some matching blue eye shadow and eyeliner. I quickly add the blue lipstick I bought just for today and stand up, brushing down my dress. “Wow, Yoko, you look really pretty!” I say slightly fawning over her.

“You look great too, how did you manage to match everything.” She says looking at all my blue features.

“Lots of shopping.” I chuckle. “Shall we go?” I ask grabbing my phone and slipping it into my, again, matching bag, a small handbag.

We make our way down to the ballroom, giggling and meeting up with others along the way. When we get there we immediately head over to the drinks bars. I pour myself a cup looking around at everyone else, looking at their outfits, everyone looks amazing. 

As I’m scanning everyone’s outfits I meet eyes with Ajax. An extremely cute guy who I may or may not have had a crush on for a while. He’s a Gorgon like me, and he looks really good tonight. He’s wearing a white jacket with a matching beanie and an adorable smile on his face. I smile back at him before I awkwardly look away and sip my drink before hurrying back to Yoko and our group of friends.

We talk and dance for a bit before I see Enid and Wednesday standing together with another guy who I don’t know. I head over to them.

“Hey, guys,” I say, clutching my drink, I’m always nervous about meeting new people. 

“OMG!” Enid says, quite high-pitched. “You look so good!”

“Thanks, Enid, you look really nice as well. You two look good too.” I say with a smile. “I-uhh-I don’t believe we’ve met?” I say to the guy next to Wednesday and I hold out my hand. “I’m (y/n).” I introduce myself and we shake hands.

“Tyler. Do you go here too then?”

“Yeah, I’m a Gorgon,” I say pointing to my headscarf.

“Oh cool.” He says and the conversation continues.

After a while, I finish my drink and head back to get another. Walking over to the drinks bowl I grab onto the ladle, spooning the odd-coloured drink into my cup I bump into Ajax.

“Hey (y/n).” He says, his hand on the back of his neck. 

“Oh, hey Ajax,” I say with a smile, suddenly nervous because of his presence. We’ve talked before, you could even call us friends but he still makes me nervous. His smile gives me butterflies.

Our conversation is interrupted by an announcement.

“Hello, Nevermore!” I hear whoops and cheering. “It’s nearly Christmas so we’ve got a little surprise for you but first we’re gonna put on a slow song so find a partner and start dancing.”

I look at the bowl, eyes set on the ladle as I get slightly panicked.

“Do you, uhh, wanna dance?” I hear Ajax ask offering his hand to me, slightly nervous.

“Yeah, why not?” I ask and I hold his hand as we make our way to the dance floor.

The song starts playing and everyone is dancing slowly, I say dancing, I mean passive swaying so we join in. My hands rest around his neck and his lie on my waist as we stare at each other in the eyes.

“You look beautiful.” He whispers to me.

“Thanks, you don’t look too bad either.” I say with a quiet laugh before suddenly getting a burst of confidence and leaning forward to rest my head on his chest. We both move closer to each other. “Is this okay?” I whisper not wanting to make him uncomfortable.

“It’s more than okay.” He whispers back and I can hear his smile in his voice then the rest of the dance is silent. The only sound I can hear is his heartbeat.

The song ends and the DJ starts speaking again.

“So, now for the surprise, I told you guys about earlier.” 

We’ve separated but he still has hold of my hand which gives me butterflies again. It feels like he could do anything and I’d still get butterflies.

“3, 2, 1…” The DJ counts down and I look around for the surprise to see lots of mistletoe drop-down, now hanging from the ceiling.

My eyes widen as I look at all the mistletoe and now kissing couples. I look at Ajax and he’s already looking at me.

“Can I… kiss you?” He asks slowly, presumably nervous. I nod before he leans down and pushes his lips against mine. They’re warm and slide against my lips I feel his hands snake around my waist as my arms tighten around his neck pulling him down and closer to me. I thought his lips would be rougher but they’re just as soft as mine if not more so and I relish in the feeling of having him close to me. Slowly, I pull away and press my forehead to his with a smile. Looking into his eyes, he smiles back. 

“Do you wanna go out with me sometime?” He asks with an adorable smile on his face.

I press my lips against his again before resuming the position with a smile. 

“Is that a yes?” He asks jokingly.

“Yes.” I say with a chuckle pulling him into a hug. 

He kisses the top of my head and squeezes my hand.

-

AN: I really enjoyed Wednesday and I loved Ajax, he's so cute.

I still have some requests to work through, I'm really sorry to those who requested a while ago and I haven't gotten to them yet. I started freelance writing professionally and I've just been a bit busy but now it's Christmas I might be able to get through some.

Also if you'd like a part 2 I have an idea for one and I might just write it anyways.

I hope you enjoyed reading!

#wednesday #ajax petropolus #ajax petropolusx reader #wednesday x reader #ajax petropolus x yn #ajax petropolus x you #wednesday x yn #wednesday x you #ajax #ajax wednesday #fanfic #fanfiction #x yn #x you #x reader #enid sinclair #wednesday addams #tyler galpin #yoko takahashi #gorgon #netflix #wednesday fanfic #wednesday fanfiction #ajax petropolus imagine #wednesday show #wednesday series #wednesday 2022 #ajax petropolus fanfic #ajax petropolus fanfiction

[i-amarobot]

Maybe I shouldnt have picked so many 800 page books to read in may

#not strictly i must read them but they are all on my list #so there is no nice little 300 page book to read in between #omg i finished revelation space after like a week #wasnt difficult to read just felt so dense #but there were times when little happened #anyway i did actually enjoy it #it just took me forever #been so long since i have read sci fi like that #also can i just say humans with tons of implant? i love that #might read the 4th murderbot next because they are always fun #also want to read under the dome but it is so chunky i am having a block #but someone said something about this book may be slightly gay? so i will push thro lads #braver than any us marine. yes i kno

[avengersassemble-fics]

What Is It about You?

part 05/10 “coincidence”

masterlist

previous part

word count 2.8k

an: yea um..... this one is a tad shorter im sorry!! but we’re finally seeing a bit more interaction between kylo and reader so hopefully that's fine with y’all?? omg we’re getting to the goods AH

The silence that filled the room was both uncomfortable and welcomed. Uncomfortable because you sat on your bed and the Commander paced around the room, and welcomed because you didn’t know what to say. Neither did he apparently. You weren’t sure if the fact he had nothing to say worried you, or made you ecstatic that this really could just be nothing. But there he was, he paced back and forth in front of you with his hands behind his back and staring at the ground. He had put his shirt back on, thankfully, and marched around your quarters.

It was nothing. It was truly nothing.

Suddenly he stopped, and rushed to you, grasping your shoulders in his large hands, and shook you roughly, “For once can you just stop your incessant thinking!”

He released you but you gaped at him in shock. He began to pace the room once more, and ignored your stare. Your fist balled at your side as you now stared at the wall. Fury rose in you as he truly had made your blood boil. Of all the people in the galaxy you were stuck with, it just had to be him. The most incessant, irritating, self-centered, anger ridden man you had ever had the fucking luck of coming on contact with. If you could go back in time and refuse this assignment, you would.

You glanced his way when you had finally noticed he stopped his paces, and found him to be staring at you. You scoffed, and looked back to the wall.

“What now,” you mumbled.

“What are you doing,” he asked. You shrugged.

“What, like you can’t hear me,” the last two words came out in a mimicked voice. He rolled his eyes.

“I can’t actually,” he paused when you looked back at him, “you’re silent for once.”

“That’s too bad, I was hoping you could hear every name I was calling you,” you said in a sarcastic tone. He raised his hand like he was going to say something but balled it into a fist, he decided it wasn’t worth his time to argue with you. He grumbled and turned his back to you.

“I have heard stories, about something like this,” he started, and you shifted a bit to view his back in full, “but it’s never been seen, not for generations.”

“What is it?” You asked.

He turned to look at you, but shook his head, “It’s not possible. It can only occur between two Force-sensitive people, you? You’re just,” he paused and you crossed your arms over your chest.

“Just what,” you egged him on.

“No one. You are no one. You come from nothing, so you are nothing.” He said simply. He walked over to his robe and proceeded to put it on, also putting his lightsaber back onto his hip. He could feel your stare on his back, and heard you stand from your position.

“You may think I’m nothing,” you laughed a bit, and shook your head, “what about you? You hide behind that mask, that name, like it’s a shield. I can accept my past. . . But can you?”

It was relatively insightful, your words, and he had turned around to see you finish your sentence. He stood there for a moment, and you thought he would retaliate, but he didn’t. Instead he glanced you over and marched to the door. As it slid open he paused only for a moment, but slid his helmet on into place and left you alone.

The question you weren’t directly asking him did make his mind wonder as he headed for his personal quarters. His stomp made people turn to look but carry on as if they feared him. They probably did. And he relished in that fact. His mind had wandered before he found himself in his familiar space, and removed his helmet once more. His hair fell freely around his face and he gripped his helmet in one of his hands, and stared at it for a few moments.

It was intricate in design. He took great pride in his work. It was meant to be menacing, it wasn’t just a mask he hid behind. No no not at all. It was him. He was Kylo Ren. The strongest of the Knights of Ren. It was all him.

He had a special place for his helmet, and it went there perfectly displayed. He detached his robe and folded it neatly away, and his lightsaber went perfectly by his helmet. He removed both of his boots and sat in a chair, and grabbed hold of his datapad to scour through something. He needed to know.

He typed away as he worked to pull up a particular file. He had never looked into it, but the revelations today felt as if it was time. He easily pulled up your file and began to skim through it. Most of the information he knew, so it was a fast read. What was odd though, was this record was only four years old years old. The Academy they often recruited from was a six year program, and you stated you had been on Starkiller for two years. It even said it here. He set the datapad down on his leg as he processed that information.

Something was not adding up. With this and today’s events in his mind, he grumbled a bit to himself. The presence ehe felt inside your mind, he knew it far too well; he had felt it in his too many times. His master's involvement puzzled him, and he was sure he would be requesting his presence soon about his part in pushing him from your mind.

Whatever it was, it made him. . . Uneasy.

- - - - - - - - - -

You didn’t see the Commander after that for quite a few days. You were cleared to return to work, but not scheduled to return to Starkiller for another day. For now, you were assigned a desk job and the time was passing by slower than you had hoped for.

In all honesty, the lack of his presence around you, and in your mind, was troubling. Why? You didn’t really know why, but you seemed to be blocking your thoughts from him either way, so maybe this was for the better. Whatever this is, you want no part in it. You just want to return to your duties, and be done with everything on this Finalizer.

Your shift was finally coming to an end. You relished in the sudden freedom and was on your way to maybe get something to eat when suddenly you were pulled to the side into an empty room.

“What-” you were cut off by the sight of the Stormtrooper you were suddenly becoming friends with, you shook your head at him, “-what are you doing?”

“I don’t know,” he said honestly, he had his helmet on his hip, “I messed up, on Jakku, I disobeyed orders and they saw-”

“Who? Who saw? What are you talking about?” You asked between his rambles. He took a deep breath.

“Ren ordered us to fire on those villagers and I-I didn’t. I couldn’t. Phasma saw me. He saw me too.”

You looked at him with sincerity, because the fear in his eyes made something in you twitch. You knew what he was trying to say. You knew what may happen to him.

“Why are you telling me this, Finn?” You asked.

“The Resistance pilot, he’s here,” you blinked at him and he shifted, “I’m. . I’m going to help him escape.”

“You’re gonna do what,” you asked, and he tried to hush you, “that’s insane! If they get ahold of you-”

“They won’t,” he cut you off, “I just. . I know they won't.”

You stared at him as you let his revelations sink in, and then he grabbed your arm, “Come with me.”

“What?”

“The First Order, what they’re doing, what they’re planning--it isn’t right!” He said. You abruptly shook your head.

“No I-”

“What’s stopping you?” he asked suddenly. You stopped the shaking of your head to stare at him, and he continued, “I see how you’re treated. And they didn’t even care when you almost died.”

“I can never support the Resistance,” you quickly spat, and took your arm from his grasp, “what they stand for, what they came from. No. . Never.”

His eyes turned into soft glares, “For peace? Freedom?”

“The New Republic destroyed my home,” you said, “they took everything from me. My world, my people, my family,” you shook your head and saw his eyes begin to soften, “I can’t. I won’t.”

Silence fell between you two, and your friend grimaced at you, he looked to his helmet and said, “Are you going to stop me?”

It was a loaded question, and he looked back up to meet your eyes. You sighed a bit and closed your eyes for a moment to process it, before you met his eyes again.

“No.”

You didn’t know if your answer took him by surprise, but the moment the word settled into his mind he embraced you in a hug. You stood there for a moment as his arms were around you, before you carefully wrapped your around him, and patted his armour. He released you after a couple of seconds and nodded at you.

“If you change your mind. . .”

“Yeah, right,” you said knowingly. He slid his helmet back on and disappeared out the door, and with one final look at you he disappeared. You stepped out of the room as well and stood in the middle of people’s way for a moment as you began to process what just happened. It took you a couple of moments before you started back on the path you were on. Food. You would just get some food and ignore the fact you knew a stormtrooper was about to attempt to break out a resistance prisoner.

You made it to a mess hall and grabbed something you could easily carry back to your temporary quarters. Just to keep your pace, you could make it. Only a few minutes had passed, there was no need to panic. That would make you look guilty-

The ship shook and everyone around you stopped to balance themselves. The alarms started to sound and you sighed to yourself. Just one day. All you want is one day without anything extraordinary happening to you, or around you! Just back to the way things were a couple weeks ago!

People rushed around you and you were quick to head back to your quarters. If you could just get there and seemingly ignore the chaos around you then you would be a happy happy camper. The ship lurked again, the floor beneath you shook in a violent manner and you cursed the stormtrooper for his Resistance favoring consciousness. But if what he told you was right, maybe he could survive with them. He wouldn’t against Phasma. Or Ren for that matter.

You finally made it back and relaxed against the door. There were a few more shakes but the ship finally settled. You started to pace your room, and chomped away at the apple you had grabbed to quench your hunger. You grew on edge when you swore you could feel Ren’s presence near your door. The anxiety, the frustration, anger. . . It was him alright.

You moved to the door before it could be thrown open on its own and pushed the button for it to open freely. There he stood, in his dark robes and helmet, on the other side and stared at you. You bit into your apple as you met his stare before turning back around to pace in your quarters.

“How did you tell it was me-”

“Because you ooze self deprecation,” you cut him off. He came into your quarters, fist twisted.

“I’m not in the mood for your comments,” he said, and you turned back to face him.

“Then why are you here, Commander?” You asked.

“Because I know you came in contact with trooper FN-2187 before he broke the Resistance pilot from out capture,” he shouted, and you froze, “did you help him?”

“What? No! Of course not!”

He let out an unimpressed hm, and looked around your space. It wasn’t much to look at, but he did glance it over.

“So. . . That’s it? Are you going to dispose of me? Turn me over to Phasma?”

He looked back to you and stared at you silently for a few moments. You grew uncomfortable so took another bite of the apple in your hand, which finally made him shake his head.

“I deleted the footage,” he said. You suddenly inhaled, the piece of apple went down the wrong tube and you sputtered because of it. It definitely was not an answer you had expected. He watched you cough and pat your chest as you regain your composure, and he audibly sighed.

“You’re hopeless,” he mumbled, and ignored the glare you sent his way. You finally spoke, but the words were quiet as your chest recovered.

“You’re insufferable.”

“You’re running out of insults, I see,” he calmly said, walking over to a corner of the room, “tell me. What did FN-2187 want with you anyway?”

“What, like you don’t know?” You managed.

“You’ve been successful in blocking me from your mind these last few days,” he commented casually, his voice hidden beneath that stupid vocoder, “ease my apprehension in trusting you. What did he want.”

He stated it more than asked. You threw the apple core away and shook your head, “He wanted me to join him. I told him no.”

“Ah,” left his mouth, “tell me, why is that? Why do you detest the Resistance as much as I do?”

You crossed your arms over your chest, “What like you don’t know? You looked into my mind.”

He pondered for a moment. Ah, yes, that memory of the girl in the woods. You in the woods. The memory that didn’t add up the second time he saw it, “Your home. . . They’re responsible for its destruction?”

“The New Republic was,” you clarified, which made him nod, “what was lost falls all on their shoulders.”

Kylo let out a satisfied hm, and he paced closer to you, “Maybe you aren’t as much a lost cause as I first believed.”

You rolled your eyes and sighed, “What do you want, Ren?”

The casual use of his name, and the tone in your voice made him stop in his tracks. You looked. . . disheveled, tired of his presence, and he felt his fist tighten at his side. But you didn’t react, no you kept your hold on his eyes behind his helmet. He lightly rubbed his fingers together, and took another step forward.

“I can help you find the truth about it,” he whispered, “the people responsible for taking your family from you.”

That seemed to catch your attention. It was just the bait he needed you to nibble on. It wasn’t truly for you, no he needed to get to the bottom of this. Of you. Something felt wrong in the Force. But that flicker in your eyes, and the raise of your brow told him all he needed to know. You were intrigued by his words.

“Why do you suddenly want to help me?”

Your questions were insufferable, but it did make him search for an answer. One that would satisfy you. As the silence lingered you crossed your arms over your chest, and he finally erupted and said, “Because you interest me.”

Your expression turned from a glare to shock. You gaped at him once and then twice before you closed it and stared at him. He could make out your tongue running over your teeth as you pondered what he said. You sighed and shook your head, but your arms unfolded into a pat on your legs.

“Okay. Fine.” you finally said.

He nodded and moved past you to the door, and you turned to watch him leave, but he paused, and motioned to you, “We return to Starkiller in the morning. We can start there.”

You nodded, and then he was gone. You stood there for a moment before you glanced back around your quarters and closed your eyes briefly. Had that gone the way you expected? No. Definitely not. From him erasing the evidence not in your favour, to that last comment you were shocked and a bit mortified at the exchange.

You interested him. What does that even mean? As in you or because of this connection you two had? No. No, there was no connection. A coincidence. It was all just coincidental. These last few weeks that’s all it was going to be in your mind! Coincidences.

Kylo Ren was just a mere coincidence. His presence, his interests, everything would be just a coincidence. You would find out who was behind the death of your family, and finally you could move on from that hurt. Stop having that dream every night of losing them. You could find peace and not feel so small and belittled anymore. Kylo Ren would help you. That was it.

- - - - - - - - - -

tag list - if i missed you please message me and let me know or if youd like to be added

@dark-night-sky-99​ @jons-angel​ @fresa-luna​ @lokilover-39​ @thomasscresswell​ @nickangel13​ @shesakillerkween @starlingelliot @candyxcyanide @sashimi-cat @chubby-dumplin @nicci442 @chewymoustachio @obsessionprofessional​ @sunbanna @silver-bubbles​ @moonprincess003 @random-stupid-stuffs​ @treestarrrrrrrr​ @ah-callie @ravngers @bensoloslover @grincheveryday @shirukitsune  @snarky--starky @indoor-kites @jay-birf03 @random-stupid-stuffs @yepimthatperson

#kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x you #kylo x reader #kylo x you #kylo ren fic #ben solo #ben solo x reader #ben solo x you #ben solo fic #star wars fic

[lilibetts]

Please wait, LoveAlarm is syncing itself to your heart!

Falling In Love With Riverdale, Theme 1: Sugar

Part 1/3

At this very moment in the not-so-idyllic town of Riverdale, Betty Cooper is 16 years, 41 weeks, 1 day, 20 hours and 34 minutes old and, to see Kevin describe it, she has been in love with Archie Andrews for 1 year, 5 months, and 14 days.

From inside the relative security of the F Hallway girls’ bathroom, she takes a deep breath to mark the magnitude of the moment, and hits [Install] on her phone. It takes less than a minute for the blue line to complete a circle and once it does, she opens the app and fills in her personal details.

Please wait, the app cheerily asks her, bright pinks and blues swirling across the screen, LoveAlarm is syncing itself to your heart!

Well, Betty sighs to herself, there’s no going back now. 

LoveAlarm is the latest matchmaking app to launch and in the two weeks since, it seems like *everyone* at Riverdale High has downloaded it. It syncs itself to your heart and a bright red heart alarm would ping if there is someone within twenty feet who loves you.

Naturally, the romantic landscape of Riverdale High School has been completely leveled. 

Midge Klump and Moose Mason both downloaded the app, only for it to tell Midge her love was unrequited. Ginger Lopez had situated herself in a prime location outside the gym doors when basketball practice let out—nobody within twenty feet of her—in the hopes that when the team’s star power forward, Anthony Parrish, came out, their phones would mutually ping. 

Instead, it was Ben Button who walked down that stretch of the hallway; instead, it was Ben Button who made her phone ping.  Then Anthony came out and *his* phone pinged, but Ginger’s did not again. According to the school grapevine, Ginger had lost her shit and called Ben a ‘baby-faced freak’.

Truthfully, the whole concept behind the app horrifies Betty, but she has to know. Making sure that every possible setting for the app is set to her phone’s vibrate function, she shoulders her backpack and heads into the cafeteria.

The walls are decorated from corner to corner with red, white, and pink streamers in anticipation of the Valentine’s Day party that will be held on Friday. PizzaShak is giving them a great deal on heart-shaped pizzas.

Her friends are at their usual table in the corner and with every step Betty takes, she is closer to knowing. When Archie hears his phone chime once she is within the twenty feet circumference, will he put two-and-two together? Will her own phone buzz with the truth? All around her, the crowded cafeteria is full of hopefuls checking their phones.

The round table has three curved benches attached to it. Kevin and Veronica share one, and across from them, Jughead and Archie split the other two. Betty slides into the space on Jughead’s left, exchanging happy hellos with her friends. Wordlessly, she hands over one of the two sandwiches she’d packed for Jughead to take. As always, he makes a show of letting out an aggrieved sigh when he spots the lettuce and sliced tomato in there with the turkey, but dutifully takes his sandwich while sliding over the remaining brownie square from his vending machine packet. This is their unspoken pact: she makes sure the bottomless pit that is Jughead Jones is sated with something healthier, he makes sure she gets a non-Alice-approved treat.

The sandwich she made is gone in three bites.

<Good?> she signs, arching one eyebrow.

<You know it,> Jughead replies, still chewing the last mouthful of turkey sandwich.

Betty has been deaf since she was three years old, after a bout with meningitis, and just because she’s well-liked among her peers doesn’t mean many of them would go as far as to learn sign language for her. That Kevin, Archie, Jughead, and Veronica have is part and parcel of why they’re her best friends.

A booted foot taps insistently against hers under the table and Betty turns away from Jughead, still grinning, to focus on Kevin. 

/Did you watch The Bachelor last night?/ His hands move as rapidly as he speaks.

/No,/ Betty tells him. /Unlike you, I actually studied for the History test./

“Har har,” Kevin deadpans. They’re both distracted by Veronica clapping her hands. 

“OMG!” she says gleefully, slapping Kevin’s bicep. /Kelley is an ICON! I told you./

As much as Betty loves her friends’ ridiculously dramatic day-after recaps, she’s too distracted to really pay attention to whatever last night’s spectacle had been about. Across the table, Archie is checking his phone, thumbs tapping and sliding across the screen. A wide grin splits his face and he turns the screen out to show Jughead.

3 people in a twenty feet radius love you!

Betty flushes and looks away, embarrassed. Of course. As covertly as possible, she takes advantage of everyone’s inattention to check her own phone.

Zero.

Nobody within a twenty feet radius loves you.

As Cheryl Strayed wrote, “acceptance is a small, quiet room”. As the realization sinks in, Betty watches, as if from a greater distance, Archie glancing around at the nearby tables, determined to figure out who those three people could be. After a few murmured words from Jughead that she can’t decipher thanks to his head being turned away from her, Archie takes off to make the rounds. A process of elimination, most likely.

Betty isn’t sure what she feels. Irritation more than disappointment? Relief? The latter emotion surprises her, especially now that she knows Archie isn’t in love with her. Kevin, and then later Veronica when she’d arrived in Riverdale, have been after her to confess her feelings to Archie but Betty has kept demurring or putting it off. Her usual excuse being that she’s too scared to wreck her friendship with him. 

Sure, they’re right when they say she’s being a coward; but is her relief after the LoveAlarm revelation just relief that now she won’t have to actually bare her heart?

She turns off her phone.

                                   ******************************************

                                                    He knows he shouldn’t be, that this definitely qualifies as eavesdropping, but here Jughead is, glancing up and over to the table where Betty is sneakily carrying on a conversation with Veronica.

It’s 7th period Honors Bio and all they need to do is finish a worksheet before the bell rings, which is easy enough, but Mr. Beeker had also stipulated silence in the classroom, so it’s a clever loophole that Betty has found. Abby, her interpreter, is absorbed in her phone, leaving Jughead to covertly watch shifting hand shapes and fingerspelled letters.

<You’re not as s-t-e-a-l-t-h-y as you think you are,> Veronica signs smugly.

<??>

<Your phone. At lunch. You d-l LoveAlarm.> Smugness melts into concern. <Well?>

This is news to Jughead, and unwelcome news at that. He shouldn’t be surprised that Betty has downloaded that stupid app and really, he should’ve seen it coming. Dread fills him as he awaits her response.

Of course Jughead refuses to download LoveAlarm. Why would he give an app his heart data? They’d only sell it to soulless companies looking to target him with ads tailored to the object of his romantic yearning.

Betty.

The facts are these: Jughead Jones is 17 years, 3 days, 6 hours and 11 minutes old. He’s also been aware that he’s deeply, irrevocably in love with Betty Cooper for 1 year, 4 months, and 19 days. An eternity, basically.

 A rare beam of sunlight has broken through the February gray outside, casting a pale glow on her downturned face, the long eyelashes that brush her cheeks. It’s the flare of her nostrils and the tight press of her lips together that tell him she’s upset. 

There’s a sharp pang in his chest.

<He doesn’t.> The words, accompanied by a shake of Betty’s head that makes her ponytail bounce, are all he needs to understand. 

Jughead isn’t obtuse, he knows which ‘he’ they’re talking about, the only one ‘he’ it could be: Archie. Blame Kevin, he’s shit at subtlety. 

So, Betty had downloaded LoveAlarm and now she knows Archie isn’t in love with her. The latter isn’t news to him but he would’ve been fine if Betty had continued to go through life not knowing that particular fact. But it’s the sentence that comes next that breaks his heart.

<I have a zero. Nobody loves me.> What goes unspoken but, to Jughead, is writ large upon her face is: ‘I’m not lovable’.

He looks away from their conversation, angry that anyone would make her feel like this. Ashamed that he is a guilty party in this.

That night while lying on his bed, Jughead finds himself torn.

What he had seen earlier has given him food for thought. Which is just as well because he likes to take the time to think broadly and deeply, much in the same way he likes to eat. Next to him on the bed, his phone is open to the App Store, and LoveAlarm waits there patiently, ready for his decision.

Is Betty Cooper worth it? Unquestionably Yes.

Is he willing to risk discovery? Having his heart spilled right out there for her to see...even worse, for others to see? Vulnerable and already bruised, where it’d easily be crushed into messy smithereens?

Unable to answer that, his brain circles back around to the first question: is Betty Cooper worth it?

With a low, drawn-out groan, Jughead hits [Install] and gives corporations access to his heart.

#bughead #avarosier writes #riverdaleevents

[redevenir]

Hi! @lxveille I wanted to send it to you via message but it is way too long, and since we don’t each other I thought it might be weird?

I’m not sure how to put it, but I’ve been reading your blog quite a lot for the past few months, and, well, while I was on my phone and couldn’t log in, I still left a few feedback here and there, but apparently they never reached you because I can’t find them on your blog, which sucks because everyone likes them and I feel like you should definitely know that here I am, appreciating your efforts past and present, and I figured, rather than sending you tiny messages, I’ll give you a very general review of the pieces I’ve read – it will be short, but please, do not hesitate if you want me to explain something, I know you’re not in my head and I might get confusing, I don’t know!! (Also, if you’ve spent a lot of time on a piece, it’s only natural to want to know more precisely what one liked in it, so feel free, I have zero thing to do and quarantine for another 3 weeks at least – probably until september so, cheers to that) And you can see I still have a lot to read !!! I’m saving them up !! It’s so hard!! Hopefully this isn’t overwhelming, since I had the time I thought «just do it» and well here we are. Have a nice day and take care of yourself!

(also sorry for the numerous typos you’ll find in this – or, to be precise, the missing words. This is my cross to bear I guess)

Seungcheol

if a tree fell in the woods, like i fell for you: *see beat [it] or [around the bush]

Joshua

as in ‘crush’ → ‘crush’ follow-up : the realness of the struggle is real, oh dear. Not only is IPA hard to grasp but I had a very shitty teacher and, well!! I’m amazed. Also love the awkwardness in this, sometimes I had to stop because of second hand embarrassment – by the way, this is something I often feel in the way you write Joshua, there’s something slightly awkward but not unpleasant, if you know what I mean? Awkward in a good way?

100 ways N°68 : I loved it!! bartender but make it space-y! Like in the Seungkwan space au, I really appreciate the grounding aspect that comes with a «normal» job set in an exotic(??) au. Your world-building (and I mean it everytime) is spot on!

revel : Well, you just Maupassant-ed all over the place, that’s it, I’m in high school again wondering what the fuck really happened.

alibi : why is the mc so rude to him??? Be tolerant !!!

drunk : see!! the awkwardness!! It’s here again, in a gentle, caring way but!!

paradigm shift : What happened to them? Where are they now? Are they ok? Did they ever meet the radio people? Part of me wants to know, part of me wants to keep it unsure so I can imagine what happened after. Also love a little heat in those panicky times.

Spill : I know the feeling. I know.

Hoshi

when the music’s right : honestly, still not sure about it, but I’m glad it exists in its own weird way.

trust fall → acquiescence → sanctuary → insolation : I saw your answer to an anon saying  the last part had «kinda flopped» so let me tell you: it was a nice end for an amazing au, it had everything and I for one cherish it for

100 ways N° 7 + 38 → apricot → of fawn and fences : the world building!! I want to take classes and learn this world’s History! I love that Soonyoung is portrayed as learning about his civilization, I think it draws a nice parallel between him and us readers, as we are both discovering/ surprised as much as he is, whereas mc seems more educated – in their own way.

100 ways N° 40 : you said it yourself « sweetheart soonyoung » well yes this is what I’m here for (among other things)

100 ways N° 42 + 50 : Every time I read one of your university au I love it. Every single time. The balance between the softness of your characters and the hardships of uni (to put it in a gentle way) makes them raw yet comforting.

beat [it] or [around the bush] : since january I’ve read this thrice, it’s never far in my head. I don’t really know how to express it but really thank you for writing it. In a way, I feel like you morning afters speak to me on a very deep level, I can connect with every single one of those I’ve read, and they all moved me like a groundswell (you can say that in french, hopefully it makes sense in english too) In conclusion they felt very personal and maybe I’m taking this too much at heart but I’m genuinely grateful you wrote them.

Wonwoo

implications : shed a few tears, loved it, loved it, loved it, in a 1984 kind of way – if you’ve seen the movie, this is the aesthetic I pictured. Really witty take on soulmates au. Super moving.

Woozi

crepuscule : love it love it love it. Don’t know what to say, I just enjoy every single word of it. It’s a treat, a candy.

happenstance : this is one of my favorite trope (is it even one though?) slice of life/shy shy shyness/university au  but in the end it’s not left unsaid so it’s super satisfying. Also a treat.

100 ways N° 12 : soft boyish bub.

100 ways N° 8 : my heart, just take it.

Sequestered : cried real tears, thank god I was alone the day I finished it.

caveat → impulse : I felt wrong to feel it was very wrong omg. Left it feeling living with a zombie might be manageable after all – who knew!

in a moment → now you, too : !!! yes!!! I !!! have no words!! that’s it!! that’s the dream!!!

charmed, unsure : heavy vibes of Only lovers left alive, which I love

asking daisies and the art of faking : *see beat [it] or [around the bush]

Mingyu

caught : as I’ve said before : What happened to them? Where is mc now? Are they ok? Also I remember whispering « noo » at the very end. The timing is very efficient, and all the details you’ve put here and there only left me wanting more: what happened before? What happens after?

Seungkwan

100 ways N° 38 : for the love of god just fall in love already

100 ways N° 57 : yes ! YES ! Space kid Seungkwan for the win !!

100 ways N° 83 : « Except there absolutely is a reason, if only either one of you would work of the nerve to name it. » That’s my jam, that’s it. I’m a bit tired now so I know I could do these fœtus reviews way better! But it doesn’t mean I love them any less !!

Vernon

easy as… (pt.1) :  I.. just, petition for making this into a tv show ? Please ? It is enthralling.

Dino

100 ways N° 37 : cute, Chan is cute. This is cute!

100 ways N° 14 : slice of life but make it apocalyptic. I’ve rand out of things to say but this? I’ve mentioned before there are some of your pieces I consider the reading equivalent of sweets. This is one of them. 15/10 would personally love a long Dino-centered apocalypse au. (among many other things but who knows! Maybe I’ll be the one to write it) (also consider: space Dino) (space college boy dino)(i’ll shut it now)

lee chan would like to buy a vowel : I remember sending you a message expressing my love for this one, but, since it never reached you !! a master piece!!! the way you write dino is so relatable?? *see also beat [it] or [around the bush]

That’s it for me.

Love.

PS : it doesn't have to remain on tumblr dot com, ask and I'll delete it right away !

#fic recs #svt fic recs

[curestardust]

if you want: (bad) sci-fi comedy with drama / lots of boring characters but cute waifus / weird and overcomplicated plot 

Watching the anime from the top of the Seasonal pile is always a gamble. Somehow an anime about horse girls (x) that I assumed to be fanservice-galore ended up being one of my favourites and then a sci-fi mystery which I was quite looking forward to ended up being a fucking trainwreck.

“Kanata no Astra” is, to put it plainly, a plot twist factory. We have like 3 episodes of the characters just doing stuff then every fucking episode ends on a cliffhanger and ups and ups and ups the story to where it goes from shocking to “you can NOT be serious”.

But lets roll it back a bit, to the very first episode. After an overdrawn sequence introducing us to Aries and Kanata, we finally meet the rest of the characters. The year is 2063, and apparently they have camps now where they just drop off a bunch of students on another planet to survive for a week and this is normal. Cool. Immediately, you know the personality of each main character as they’re as cookie-cutter as it gets and we’ve seen it a 1000 times. The clumsy one, the one with the hero complex, the cool and smart one, the tsundere, the brooding one, the shy one, the charming one and the always cheery one. There’s also a 10-year-old with them, who’s cute. Of course, all of them also have their random skills that will make them useful for the trip. Which of course goes as well as you would expect. Like 2 minutes after landing on McPa, their camping planet, a random ass sphere appears and sucks each of the characters in, who find themselves in deep space. Somehow, all of them managed to put their helmets back on so now their main problem is that they’re floating in the middle of nowhere! But do not worry, dear viewer, as a old ship is for some reason floating very close to them and after a bit of dramatic struggling they all manage to board it. Then comes the shocking reveal! They somehow ended up 5,000 lightyears away from their home planet! There isn’t enough food or water for a full trip. Oh no! But do not worry, dear viewer, as somehow there are 5 habitable planets just on their way back home where they can restock (and at this point the possibility of food and water shortage is immediately forgotten). What a coincidence! And this is where we start our story, a group of teens, lost in space, against the elements, having to visit dangerous planets and the mystery as to how this all happened. Sounds interesting enough, right? Well, prepare for all that potential to be squandered.

This is where the spoilers start as I need to talk about all the nonesense I’ve been subjected to.

<spoilers start>

First of the planets they visit all blend together. There is only one thing that’s a threat and it’s always the fucking plants. There is one time an animal is a threat to one of them but that’s solved in a few minutes. It doesn’t matter anyway, as it’s quite obvious that none of them are going to die. This anime tries to blend lighthearted humour with drama and it really doesn’t work. The humour always comes out of nowhere at the worst moments possible, always undercutting the seriousness of any situation. The characters also get their backstories revealed, usually in boring flashbacks, and I could basically see the “Plot Armour Unlocked” achievement pop up in my peripheral vision whenever that happened. Then these characters get thrown into the background and are relegated to random remarks so we don’t forget that they still exist as we move forward with the story. These backstory reveals are supposed to make us really feel for these characters which would be carrying the emotional weight of the upcoming dramatic moments but it doesn’t change the fact that all of them have 1 personality trait. The anime was basically asking me to care for characters with the personality of a pebble. I didn’t. And that’s bad because everyone is always CRYING! Speech? Crying. Reconcaliation? Crying. Dramatic backstory? Crying. Danger? Crying. Anything? Crying! I was rolling my eyes so often I almost gave myself a migraine.

Then the main story. First, the “smart one” (Zack) and the” hero complex turned captain” (Kanata) find out that there’s a traitor among them who was the cause behind the sphere. Then they do the logical thing and keep it to themselves and observe everyone with a close e- OF COURSE THEY DON’T DO THAT. They immediately tell everyone on the ship about it! There’s an uproar that lasts about 30 seconds then they all settle on the fact that they’re all companions and friends now UWU and they shouldn’t worry about it. Anyway, anyone with half a brain could narrow the potential suspect down to 3 characters. Luca, the DIY master and cheery one, Ulgar, the always brooding and mysterious one and Charce, the charming chef who doesn’t seem to have anything bad about him. Well, Luca and Ulgar have a show off on like the second or third planet where their backstories get unlocked and they can be crossed out from the list. Meaning, that you knew who the traitor was halfway through, making their reveal pretty lackluster.

But this all would’ve been fine, has it not been for the plot surrounding their “attempted murder”. Through everyone’s stories one thing becomes clear: they all had shitty parents (except for Aries). If I had known what the actual reason ends up being I’d have been screaming “NO this is good, this is an interesting concept!!!”. As we get a few scenes with the parents back home, this could’ve been so interesting. Maybe, they sent their kids they didn’t love to die and then someone regrets it and threatens to report it and then they have to stop them! THAT would’ve been great. The actual reason though, not only is ridiculous but comes from complete speculation. The 10-year-old with them, Funi is another member’s adopted little sister, the tsundere Quitterie’s. The 2 look literally the same. Same skin colour, hair colour, eye colour but somehow this didn’t peak Quitterie’s curiosity in the slightest as when Zack does a DNA test she is like “omg what if we’re actually related wow”. Except, Zack finds something else: the 2′s DNA are a complete match. So he reveals to them that they’re “the same person”. Interesting. Then he jumps about 1km forward and arrives to the conclusion that they are, in fact, ALL clones of their parents and as a law was passed tha made cloning illegal, it was the reason for wanting to kill them in deep space. Wha...

Ok...ok. Now we’re going into a weird territory but I can deal with this. Not a bad concept. Aight.

Except it doesn’t stop here. On their last planet, they find an astronaut who’s been in stasis after her ship broke down. When the team finds her and unfreezes her she is like “OMG I can finally go back to Earth!!!” and they’re like “...what’s Earth?”. Now this storyline was what completely broke me. They apparently live on a planet that looks very much like Earth, called Astra. Which is fun cause they named their ship Astra...and they acted like they didn’t know what it was? There was a plaque with the quote “Per aspera, ad Astra” in the ship (which I’m quite familiar with as it’s one of my favourite quotes). Then Kanata is like “Astra....I like that.” ISN’T THAT YOUR PLANET’S NAME??? Imagine naming your ship “Earth”, like????????

Khm, anyway, Polina, the astronaut, explains to them that an asteroid was supposed to crash into Earth and this is why they were looking for another planet to migrate to. Jump a little forward and we get the info that the sphere is actually a warp gate humanity used to move over to Astra, however there was war and crime and shit over land and they deactivated them. Then humanity was so ashamed that they “rolled back history” 100 years and erased that part from human history......and this somehow worked.....oh and they also abolished all countries and unified the whole planet and made everyone speak the same language. Oh, and they also banned guns...

Anyway, all this is kept secret by the only place they allowed to keep the Monarchy system which is where Charce is from and is how he knows all this. Then he goes and completely KO’s me with his final revelation that Aries is the clone of the daughter of the king??? And was being raised by one of her handmaidens??

Let me also finish this complain-fest off with the stupidest moment in the whole anime. Charce, after realising that he does actually want to be with his friends, activates the warp gate to commit suicide. Kanata jumps to him and he....he.....puts his arm out toward the warp gate and shouts “Stay back!” at it. Then when that OBVIOUSLY doesn’t work and his forearm gets sucked in Charce panicks and deactivates the gate, ripping Kanata’s right forearm off. This is all pretty hilarious in itself but then Kanata dramatically says to Charce “You promised to be my right hand man” as we get a shot of his bloody amputated right arm. [Key Smash]. I laughed for almost 5 minutes at that.

<spoilers end>

If you skipped all that here’s a short summary: can’t balance the drama and the humour, the humour is pretty bad, the characters all have 1 personality trait, the emotional moments don’t carry any weight, incredibly stupid and overcomplicated story with a lot of plot holes, predictable outcomes.

But for some reason people do like this anime. I’m guessing half of them are there for the cute waifus and the other half hasn’t seen actually good sci-fi comedy with drama (cough Cowboy Bebop cough) but whatever. Watch it, don’t watch it, this was more of me complaining than an actual review.

[3/10] (x)

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | This anime killed my parents

#dusty reviews #Astra Lost in Space #Kanata no Astra #long post #sorry yall #but i had to get this all out of my system

[taeheyhey]

Close to Normal

Chapter 21 - Silver Screen

Taehyung x Reader - 3.5K words

A/N - OMG! The penultimate chapter! I can't believe I'm almost done!! I really REALLY hope you enjoy this part, please let me know by liking, reblogging or commenting! As always, if you have any questions about any of it I would be thrilled to answer them! Thank you all so much for reading you lovely bunch! 💗❤💜

One ~ Two ~ Three ~ Four ~ Five ~ Six ~ Seven ~ Eight ~ Nine ~ Ten ~ Eleven ~ Twelve ~ Thirteen ~ Fourteen ~ Fifteen ~ Sixteen ~ Seventeen ~ Eighteen ~ Nineteen ~ Twenty ~ Twenty-One ~ Twenty-Two

When Hannah returned to the room after the notification on her phone had interrupted your conversation, she hadn’t seemed quite as keen to carry on with her line of inquiry – a fact which, at the time, you had been grateful for.

Despite the fact you had been able to laugh about it, albeit briefly, it still caused you pain to recall those memories, but with each day that passed you felt increasingly curious as to the reason behind her swift change of mood.

She had poked her head around the door before entering, looking almost as though she was trying to sneak someone in to the room, and then stepped over the threshold awkwardly after finding your eyes locked on hers.

She stood by the entrance to the room, motionless but for rocking back and forth gently on the balls of her feet, an action you recognised as something Hannah used to do when she had been caught doing something wrong as a child.

“Is there something going on, Hannah?"

Between her odd stance in the doorway and the way she had acted after fetching the wine earlier, you were beginning to suspect that she may very well be up to something, and whenever Hannah made up her mind to be up to something experience had taught you to be wary.

“Like what?”

“Not exactly a convincing response,” you laughed at the squeak in her voice.

“Ah it’s nothing really,” she offered you a brief smile before a very obviously fake yawn left her and she lifted a non-existent watch before her vision. “Oh wow, is that the time already?”

Needless to say you had been unsurprised when she didn’t opt for the performing arts in her further education.

You got the distinct impression she wanted to be alone, and seeing as it was still relatively early you decided to venture downstairs to see if Ronnie would benefit from your help or your company.

“I’ll be back in a few hours okay. I’ll let you get an early night.”

She responded to you with a non-committal hum of agreement and rolled on to her side on the bed, the light from her phone illuminating the determined look on her face, her tongue gripped between her teeth and eyebrows knitted together in concentration, as she furiously tapped on to the screen.

~~~

He guessed that he hadn't exactly been discreet when he’d seen your name being repeatedly entered in to the comments, it had completely stopped him in his tracks and he lost the thread of whatever it was that he had been talking about, causing him to shake his head to regain his focus and laugh unnaturally until he was able to continue.

They had all been on such high alert for the appearance of your name in any capacity since it had become abundantly clear that Taehyung was not going to simply forget about you and move on, as the elder members of the group had initially suspected he might.

In the beginning, any time they saw it they would immediately begin looking for any further indications that it was Taehyung’s girl trying to make contact, but every time it turned out to be merely a coincidence, and the members would step down from red alert and resume normal operations.

After a month and a half of this rigmarole it became much easier for them not to outwardly react, and for some of them it had begun to cause so much stress that they needed to endeavour to cease inwardly reacting as well.

This time though the name had repeated over and over, apparently refusing to desist until the phantom commenter was satisfied their cries in to cyber space had been received loud and clear.

Namjoon wracked his brain and tried to work out how to proceed. He looked into the webcam in what he hoped was a meaningful way and began talking about Twitter in English.

The stream of repeated comments halted for a moment and he kept one eye on the feed as he carried on talking, deciding that if by some miracle whoever it was that purported to know you got the hint, he would stop his broadcast as he was struggling to multitask in this way and he felt guilty for not giving the rest of the viewers his complete attention.

After a few moments it appeared that his intimation was understood and the commenter appeared again detailing her Twitter handle, and he quickly took a screenshot of it and commenced signing off his broadcast, mentally preparing himself for whatever reaction he would get from Taehyung.

“How do we know it’s legitimate?” Yoongi had asked as he lowered his tablet from his face for the first time since their leader had entered the room and began speaking with them all, his eyes – full of concern – flicking over to Taehyung, who was stood stock-still as though he had been paused, his eyes even larger than usual as he tried to take in what he was hearing.

“It’s too much of a coincidence isn’t it, hyung?” Jimin cut in, turning to the second oldest. “There are maybe ten people in the world who know about what happened and what her name is.”

“And seven of them are in this room,” Jungkook finished.

Hoseok shifted in his seat, his brows furrowed, before leaning forward and resting his elbows on to his knees. “Could she have told people? Gone to the press once she found out – ”

“No,” Taehyung cut in instantly and firmly, finally breaking his silence. “There’s no way she would do that, hyung. I know her.”

He knew it seemed like a weird thing to say, especially since it had been a quarter of a year since those few short days in which he had gotten to know you. What sane person would claim to truly know someone else in such a short space of time when they barely understood any words that were exchanged?

And yet none of the members contradicted him. Hoseok simply nodded and sat back in his chair at his vehemence. Being as prone as Taehyung had previously been to fickle fads and interests, these past few months they had all seen a change in him. They had seen him go through extreme highs and lows, and experience hope and despair in equal measure and fervour. The only constant had been that you had been on his mind and in his heart the entire time, and it was easy for the others to recognise and acknowledge the profound effect you had clearly had on him.

“It all seems to be genuine,” Namjoon addressed them all. “Besides, if the press did know anything about it all hell would have broken loose by now. I used Seong-min’s account to message her, asked her some questions to verify she was who she said she was – like the name of the city and the bar. She said her name was Hannah.”

At that, Taehyung's head shot up. “Hannah. That’s her best friend,” he sat down on the sofa beside Jimin as he felt the strength leave his lower half. “It’s really her,” he said to no one in particular, his voice breathy with wonderment.

“Why didn’t she get in touch herself, why did the friend do it?” Jimin asked after a few moments to allow the revelation to sink in for everyone, placing a soothing arm around his friend and squeezing his shoulder reassuringly.

Jimin’s question brought Taehyung back down to earth and he turned his gaze to Namjoon, his face the very picture of wide-eyed curiosity.

He looked uneasy for a moment as his eyes scanned the room. He sighed heavily and shoved his hands in to his pockets. “She hasn’t seen it, the V Lives, the Bangtan Bombs. Nothing.”

There was a pause as his words sunk in. Everything they had done and all the effort they had put in to get your attention and you hadn’t even been aware of it.

Yoongi swore and Jin groaned, rubbing his thumbs over the calluses on his finger tips that had hardened even more following all the practice he had put in to learn what everyone was referring to as ‘your song’. Taehyung sat forward and placed his head in his hands while Jimin tightened his grip around him.

“She hasn’t seen any of it?” Taehyung's voice was muffled and quiet. He rubbed his hands over his face as he looked up at Namjoon, feeling panic and worry begin to form in the pit of his stomach. “Why? Did she forget about me? Did I upset her?”

Namjoon felt his heart go out to the younger member, and he walked over to the sofa and crouched down in front of him, placing a hand on his shoulder and looking him square in the eyes. “She didn’t even tell her friend about it, Taehyung-ah. This Hannah worked it out for herself and tried to get her to talk about it. She said she misses you.”

“She does?” Taehyung looked so childlike at that moment it was all Namjoon could do to not pull him in to a hug immediately, but he could see the tears beginning to form in his dongsaeng's eyes and he knew if he was outwardly affectionate towards him it could set him off crying, and Namjoon knew he hated to cry in front of some of the members.

“Of course she does idiot, why wouldn’t she?” he said softly. “Her friend seems to think she may have been a bit...overwhelmed when she found out about, well, everything,” he offered as further explanation.

“I can imagine it being quite hard to get your head around, finding out someone you are seeing is a celebrity all of a sudden.” Hoseok offered from across the room to murmurs of agreement.

Taehyung looked sheepishly at the floor between his feet. “I didn’t handle any of this particularly well did I, hyung?”

Namjoon smiled warmly at him before patting his shoulder light-heartedly and standing upright to begin to explain his proposed next move. “Maybe not. But now we get to fix it, right?” 

 ~~~

A week or so had gone by since Hannah’s bizarre behaviour had caused you to leave her to her alleged “early night”, making your way down to the bar and nodding a greeting to Ronnie while pulling on your apron, much to his surprise.

It had gotten a little busier in the bar since Hannah had come back, she always had a tendency to attract a younger crowd whenever she worked, and as it was the only place to drink in that area, the customers would stay and drink even after they found out she wasn’t there – albeit a tad begrudgingly.

“Everything alright, y/n?” Ronnie had asked as he passed over a full pint glass to a young bearded man in a lumberjack shirt, eyeing the man-bun wobbling precariously atop the customer’s head with thinly-veiled mistrust.

“Yeah it’s fine I think. Hannah is just acting a little weird.” You pulled down the empty vodka bottle from the rack at the back of the bar and pushed the optic in to a fresh one before re-mounting it. “Did she say anything to you when she came down?”

You wouldn’t find out till later that Hannah had asked her father not to disclose their conversation where Ronnie confirmed Taehyung’s identity, and so he had shrugged non-committally, and struggled to meet your eyes.

“Nothing I can think of off the top of my head,” he responded and shot another scowl at the man in the checkered shirt as he began to speak unnecessarily loudly in to his phone.

You had left it at that, and in the days that passed you largely were able to put it out of your mind, assuming it may have had something to do with Kevin or her next potential victim. You understood all too well the feeling of not being ready to discuss something, and you trusted that she would tell you about whatever it was when she felt like it, although it would have been a lie to say it didn’t sting a little that she did not reveal the reasons behind her abrupt change in mood that night, especially after you had finally confided in her about your days with Taehyung.

You had been relieved when she suggested a trip to the cinema, having begun to wonder whether or not she was avoiding you intentionally, or if you were just being paranoid.

“I thought we go could go tomorrow evening. Dad said he will be fine on his own for a couple of hours. We’ll get dressed up and have some food too before, what did you think?”

You smiled and nodded eagerly, excited at the thought of spending some quality time with your friend, however you didn’t fail to notice the relieved expression that spread over her face, almost like she’d expected you to say no. “Sounds great, what do you want to see?”

Her eyes widened as though she hadn’t thought that far ahead, although why that seemed to panic her you had no idea. “Um, I think they’re showing The Notebookagain,” she finally declared, exhaling a deep breath as you nodded once more in agreement.

You weren’t sure if that film was a particularly good idea, given how your delicate your emotional state had been, but you had seen it so many times at that point you were at least partially de-sensitised to even some of the movie's most potent scenes.

There was a small movie theatre not too far away from the bar, it only had a couple of screens and was about twenty times smaller than the numerous other theatres which were dotted about in the centre of the city, but you much preferred the air of authenticity of the older building, which still had curtains obscuring the screens which would open before the feature began, and you appreciated the ceremony of it all.

Throughout the meal Hannah had seemed distracted, and repeatedly checked her phone, chewing on her thumbnail and exhaling through flared nostrils after tapping out a response to whoever or whatever was pulling her focus from the large bowl of pasta in front of her which was rapidly cooling.

You reached over and placed your hand on top of her free hand, her phone still gripped too tightly in the other. The contact startled her and her eyes flicked to you as though she had forgotten you were there.

“Hannah, you are really freaking me out, please tell me what’s going on with you?”

She put her phone down and flipped her hand over to grip yours, squeezing it and grimacing apologetically. “Ah, I’m so sorry I’m not being good company am I?”

You shook your head and smiled warmly at her. “I just want to know you are okay. You’ve been...off for like a week now. You know you can talk to me, right? I know I offloaded some stuff on you the other night but I don’t intend to make it all about me. I’m here for you Hannah, you know that don’t you?”

The look of guilt that crumpled your friend’s face worried you even more, but she recovered quickly, a wide grin stretching her mouth as she picking up her fork. “I’m fine. I’m better than fine, I am awesome! I’m here with my dearest friend, what could possibly be wrong with me?” Hannah announced emphatically, spearing a piece of penne and shoving it unceremoniously in to her mouth and chewing with zeal, her lips curling down as soon as she realised just how cold her food had gotten while she had been preoccupied with her phone.

“You have always been a terrible liar, Hannah, but whatever. Just promise that you will talk to me if you need to.”

“I am a fantastic liar, always have been,” she said cheekily and gestured at you with her fork, and with the sudden shift in mood you knew she would divulge nothing further, such was her stubbornness.

“Uh-huh, sure.” You raised your hand to get the attention of the waiter who had been making eyes at Hannah all evening. He, of course, ignored you completely and you rolled your eyes. “You want to ask for the bill? The film is meant to start in twenty minutes isn’t it?”

You had left Hannah to organise the evening at her insistence, and she checked her notifications one more time while distractedly lifting her hand limply, frustratingly obtaining the server's attention instantly, and he appeared at the side of the table so swiftly it was as though he had teleported in.

You paid the check and left the restaurant, flagging down a cab to take you the short distance from there to the movie theatre. The unnecessary heels you were both wearing were also at Hannah’s insistence, despite your argument that for the most part you would just be sat in a dark room together, and what would normally be a ten minute walk suddenly necessitated transportation to save your feet from blisters.

You scanned the receipt from the meal for something to do as Hannah’s handset buzzed loudly again, unsurprised to find what you assumed to be the waiter’s number scrawled at the bottom of the slip of paper. “You’ve snared another one Han,” you informed her as you handed it over to her. “Please tell me what it’s like to be irresistible?”

She pressed the back of her hand to her forehead dramatically and sighed like a corseted woman in an old movie. “Exhausting.”

You laughed and reached for your purse as the cab pulled up at your destination. “I’ll bet.”

The cinema was more deserted than you had ever seen it as you strolled through the lobby towards the snack counter, and apart from the two members of staff you had passed upon entry and the one in front if the popcorn machine, you could not see another living soul anywhere. You shrugged to yourself and inclined your head towards the popcorn. “You want some?”

Hannah shook her head and rubbed her stomach theatrically. “Oh no, I couldn’t eat another thing. Let’s just go and sit down, my feet are killing me,” she answered while shooting you a warning look as though she could sense the ‘I told you so’ on the tip of your tongue.

You entered the completely deserted cinema screen and stood still in the door way, scanning the sea of unoccupied seats before you. “Well it’s a good job you booked this in advance Hannah, we’d be lucky to get a seat otherwise.”

She walked past you with her nose in the air and headed towards the very centre of the room. “Sarcasm is lowest form of wit y/n,” she said prudishly as she sidled in to the middle row.

You chuckled at her faux-primness and shuffled along the row to take the seat next to her, both of you removing your jackets and you beginning to settle down and wait for the movie to start.

After a few moments of comfortable silence, the familiar sound of Hannah’s phone rang out against the quiet of the large room, and she sat bolt upright as though she she’d been tasered. She slapped her hand against her thighs before standing up, the sudden action causing you to flinch away from her in shock.

“Right,” she announced too loudly, and you were sure that the young girl at the ticket window could have heard her. “I’m going to get some popcorn.”

You were too taken aback by the odd and stiff tone in her voice to remind her that she had just minutes ago claimed to be too full to eat anything else, and you sat in stunned silence and watched her awkwardly attempt to shuffle at speed out of the row of seats.

Turning to face the screen with your eyebrows still furrowed at Hannah’s behaviour, you inwardly cursed at the poor timing as the lights began to dim and the heavy maroon velvet drapery started to pull back from the screen. You whipped your head around to see if Hannah had noticed just in time to vaguely make out the double doors closing behind her.

Once the room was in complete darkness you took a moment to be slightly creeped out. You had never sat in a completely empty movie theatre before, and it was a strange feeling to be alone in such a large, dark room.

The sensation didn’t last long however as what you assumed to be the trailers began to light up the screen.

You heard the gentle strumming of an acoustic guitar play out over the speakers, the melody seeming to come from every direction as a tingling of recognition stroked it’s fingers up and down the back of your neck, causing the small hairs there to stand on end.

As butterflies began to form in your stomach and you failed to swallow down the lump that had suddenly taken up residence in your throat, the only thing occupying the entirely black screen were three words, written in white script.

Golden Closet Film.

A/N - The finale will be posted next Friday! I hope you look forward to it! 😚😊

#bts fanfic #bts v #bts #taehyung fluff #taehyung smut #bts kim taehyung #bts taehyung #taehyung scenarios #v x reader #kim taehyung #taehyung #taehyung x reader #bts angst #bts imagines #taehyung angst #bts fluff #bangtan boys #bts smut #bts v fanfic #bts scenarios

[kathleensmithmusic]

(pic by Melodee Solomon.)

A SMATTERING / AND ALSO A BIT ON PERMISSION

I have been taking a little brain break from this space, AND, I was just watching a video by the brilliant the super magical Angel Phoenix, and it juiced me up so much, I had to pop on here to say a few things.

This is basically just a smorgasbord of some of the things currently between my ears:

1. WHATEVER FEELS RIGHT TO YOU, LEAN INTO THAT. There are people, ideas, stories & paradigms that have coding that resonates with the home vibration of your soul. You’ll know it by the way engaging with them makes you feel more relaxed (that deep parasympathetic sigh of the nervous system dropping, for example), more spacious, possibly more turned on but from a spacious & delighted & inspired space, and more excited about YOU and YOUR LIFE and whatever YOUR MEDICINE is for this life. GO THERE. Fuck everything else. I truly mean it. FUCK IT ALL except that which is in tune & resonance with your heart & soul. Follow what feels right. Your body knows. Listen & allow!!!! Doesn’t have to resonate for ANYONE ELSE but if it does for you, THAT IS MEDICINE TO TRUST!!!!!!

2. In service to that very thing—i.e. TEND TO YOUR OWN SOUL, HEART & NERVOUS SYSTEM & MAGICAL BODY--these are some things I’ve been up to and not up to lately:

        1. Staying (mostly) off social media: I deleted IG from my phone ten days ago. I realized it has an addictive hold on me, and I don’t feel good when I engage with it for more than about 5 minutes per day. It took less than 48 hours for me to start to feel inner peace and joy again. (I only popped back in here because this transmission feels exciting & important, and I’m going to re-delete when I’m finished posting!). Some people can engage with social & be fine, just like some people can engage with alcohol and be fine. Others of us cannot. It’s all good. The point is to know our own energy and honor & tend to it in ways that deeply nourish us individually. There is no ONE way—only the way that feels right deep in our bones.

        2. Sleeping a lot. I was already a 9-10h/night lady, and these days I take lots of naps, too.

        3. Working out EVERY SINGLE DAY, first thing in the morning. You’ve probably noticed me talking about my workouts. They are my favorite thing aside from music & my husband & planet Earth, and they keep me sane and grounded and joyful. I just show up and do what my trainer (on the screen) tells me, and I get stronger & fitter every fucking day. OMG I could talk about this whole thing for hours.  Nothing juices me the way working out does, and can I just say—BEING & FEELING STRONG AF has changed EVERYTHING about my life over the past ten months. I am fucking HERE these days. Like—hello, planet Earth, I am HERE and I am not trying to be anywhere else, and I FUCKING LOVE IT HERE.

        4. Limiting consumption of covid info, politics, news, etc. – I mean, I already didn’t read the news, but when this whole thing hit, I was gobbling it up for hours a day and F R E A K I N G out a LOT. I realized that doesn’t work for me, because honestly, a freaked out, paralyzed, terror-ridden Kathleen is no good to anyone. New rule: no consuming for Kathleen. Shawn gives any updates. This rule has really been working for me. I slacked for a couple of weeks and then realized I was starting to feel unwell, and that’s when I deleted IG from my phone ten days ago, and VOILA: FEELING A BAZILLION TIMES BETTER.

        5. MASSIVE PERMISSION: I have a vision in my heart about who I know I could be and how massively I feel I can and want to serve people & the world, and for the first few weeks of this whole quarantine/COVID situation, I was ON FUCKING FIRE with it in a new way.

Excited. Scared. Married to the vision of what feels important to me. Making stuff. Sharing a little more, etc.

And then, suddenly, after about three weeks of that, I just felt EXHAUSTED BEYOND BELIEF.

Suddenly, all I wanted was to not care one whit about the world, or my mission, or anything beyond my tiny, cozy life, and just read books and paint my nails.

You know—immediate vicinity shit.  Back into the CAVE.

So, boom—PERMISSION TO FEEL THAT WAY & PERMISSION TO CAVE IN & PERMISSION TO COZIFY & LIVE MY TINY LITTLE LIFE. I let go of caring about my mission, fell off the face of social and went inward.

I read Mists of Avalon (OMFG WHAT A MAGICAL FUCKING BOOK).

I started cooking again.

I just fucking was quiet and cozy and stopped giving a flying fuck about anything other than enjoying the simple life right in front of my eyes.

I’m still in that space, and can I just tell you—WHAT A FUCKING RELIEF.

I can’t even tell you the agida (is that how you spell it?!) and angst and despair and G R A S P I N G that I have experienced for my entire life around MY MISSION and MY VISION and MY MUSIC and MY DESIRE TO SERVE ON A MASSSSSSSIVE LEVEL and MY COMPULSION TO BE SEEN (coupled with somatic terror for my literal safety, which led to a MASSIVE stalemate inside of me because the brain says “I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY & I MUST BE SEEN!!!” and the subconscious says “I MUST NOT EVER BEEN SEEN TOO WIDELY BECAUSE THAT WILL GET ME KILLED & EXILED, AND I MUST REMAIN SAFE AT ANY AND ALL COSTS.”)

What a tangled, dramatic mess it has always been, and just fucking STRESSFUL as all get out.

And now, there is a new peace.

I don’t know whether it’s quarantine, or the prayer practice I’m in right now, or getting older, or the masks that are dropping like flies for all of humanity right now, or what, but suddenly, it feels like layers of my personality that have been all tied up in my mission & my purpose & my grand and grandiose desires to serve on a global and cosmic level (& all of the agitation that comes with it because of the equally loud & powerful parts inside of me who must stay safe at all costs) have just been dropping away.

Like the way a cicada suddenly drops its exoskeleton and emerges brand new.

Like the way a seed planted in the dark, moist Earth splits open, and a new form emerges.

LIKE: NEW ME—WHO DIS?

But not NEW ME as much as just…Kathleen, deconditioned to a deeper degree than ever.

Kathleen who suddenly realized that she doesn’t actually have to DO anything AT ALL to be enough—I already AM enough, and actually, enoughness is not even on the table. 

Here I am, a human on the Earth, having an experience, and haha—joke’s on me, because THAT HAS BEEN THE WHOLE POINT, THE WHOLE TIME!!!!!

That’s it: EXPERIENCE.

The whole situation, the entire enchilada, the big fucking secret hiding out in plain sight.

LIFE LIVING LIFE.

Consciousness & the Universe experiencing Itself through the body/personality/soul matrix of the one we call Kathleen, who has never existed in this particularity before and never will, and

EVERY

SINGLE THING

She experiences

Is

Just

E X P E R I E N C E,

Is just

The mirror consciousness uses to say

“Oh hey, here I am again, in THIS form, in THIS form, in THIS form!” HOW GLORIOUS!!!!!!

 The Universe narrowed herself from her infinitude IN ORDER TO EXPERIENCE Herself as ME, and THAT IS ALL!

 Life living life.

 The Great Whatever experiencing this whole thing & play of life as a human on Earth.

 WHAT?!?!?!?!

 AND ALSO: WHAT A REVELATION AND A RELIEF!!!!!

 I don’t have to free anyone, or serve anyone, or fucking achieve some grand mission, or be productive to earn love (or safety or security) because it’s what I’ve been conditioned to believe.

 I live on a fucking planet that has fish & plants that glow, light shows that happen in the sky (Northern lights), unicorns who swim in the fucking ocean (hello narwhales), trees that give me oxygen and dirt that gives me food.

 I can just L I V E, however feels right or not right to me, and it’s all good.

 ARE YOU FOLLOWING?!? I mean, what a revelation.

 Nothing to do, no one to be, nowhere to go.

 Have I ever lived that way? Definitely fucking no.

 Does it feel amazing to do so now? Definitely fucking yes.

 Okay, I hope that made some sense to you.

 These things—these deep Mysteries—always are like trying to carry the actual SUN in the bed of a Ford F350.

 IMPOSSIBLE.

 And yet, the words & the transmission can hopefully be felt.

 NOTHING TO DO.

NOWHERE TO BE.

NO ONE TO BE.

 And then what? Then the rest is

FUCKING

BONUS.

(pic by Melodee Solomon.)

Okay, I LOVE YOU.

 I’m going back into my cave.

(I made gluten-free sourdough starter this past ten days, so I’m making bread tonight!!!)

(amazing photo by me. HA!)

I may or may not emerge at some point, but regardless, please remember: I LOVE YOU. LIFE LOVES YOU. YOU ARE DOING THIS PERFECTLY. HEED YOUR INNER URGINGS. FOLLOW WHAT FEELS RIGHT. PRAY TO SOMETHING (I pray to the Divine Mother) IF THAT FEELS GOOD. AND: NO MATTER WHAT IS GOING ON IN THE WORLD, YOU CAN BE SOVEREIGN IN YOUR OWN HEART & MIND, and THAT is something that never needs to change.

 AND—FUCKING REACH OUT!

If you’re having a TIME or need a pep talk or WHATEVER, REACH THE FUCK OUT TO ME. If you do it here, not sure when I’ll see it, so better to text or email me, but I AM HERE 4 U, and we all belong to each other, so let’s fucking keep loving & living & daydreaming together.

I GOT U BOO.

I LOVE U.

If we could see each other in person, I’d give you some sourdough bread or some of the apple muffins I made this morning or some of the sourdough starter I made (I HAVE EXTRA, ACTUALLY, SO IF YOU ARE IN SANTA FE AND WANT SOME, TRULY, PLEASE, HMU.)

Okay okay, volcano transmission over for now.

LOVE UUUUUUUUUUU

4EVAAAAAA

(pic by Seth Jacob.)

#music singersongwriter magic love