#omgggggg tumblr formatting is such a mess

[pineapplebread]

So... this might sound really weird but I'm an openly sexual person and a big fan of Stony and I'm curious about your amazing tattoo au. When Tony and Steve spent their very first night together... was it slow, passionate love-making, or hot and heavy, desperate, hard fucking? Or somewhere in between? Etc...

I like to think maybe it started fast and desperate. It’s been years in the making after all, it’s been over a decade and Steve never thought he would be here. He never thought he could have Tony like this. He’d promised himself just repairing their friendship would be more enough. He’d been happy to simply be by Tony’s side during his recovery after the War, hold his hand through the long days of howling agony and the endless nights that echo with screams and exhaustion. 

He’d thought Tony would shove him away at any given moment when he’s had enough and remembered Steve was part of the reason he’d had to suffer the loss of so much. After all, if Steve had only listened, Tony wouldn't have had to face the end of the world alone the first time. If only Steve had listened. 

So having Tony pulling at him with the same heated desperation and frenzied kisses now stuns Steve and shatters every ounce of his control. 

All of the clenched fists, turned heads, clenched jaws, the years of pain and hurt and lies and fights that created gulfs between them is now closing as they pull each other in. The same way they come together now echoes the clash of punches from so long ago, and Tony is the only one who can drive Steve to such extremes. Only Tony can drive him from ferocious anger to feral obsession, and Steve has come to live with both emotions tangled irrevocably within him until his whole heart and mind are consumed with Tony, and Tony only, especially now. 

Now that he gets to have Tony. 

He has Tony, Steve repeats to himself wonderingly. 

It’s everything and nothing at all like their first time all those years ago in Clint’s home. That had been fast and brutal, sharp teeth and bruising grips and hard thrusts, moans swallowed down in the opaque dark. Steve had been punishing Tony for Ultron as much as he had been punishing himself for falling for someone like Tony—rash and abrasive and arrogant and broken and brilliant and so damned beautiful it hurt to look at him. Even then, Steve couldn’t shake the tangled mess of emotions he felt for Tony, and even then it had been an infatuation wrapped with obsession. But Tony hadn’t loved him then. 

Now. 

Now, Tony is looking up at him with bright eyes full of warmth and love and the same relieved wonderment Steve knows is reflected in his own. Tony’s nails are digging crescents into Steve’s shoulders, his head tossed back and neck bared when Steve pushes in again, chasing that wild edge of desperation to claim thrumming through his veins. He has to bite back the feeling of wanting more until he’s connected with Tony in every way, inside him where he belongs. Home. 

Steve had spent so many years running from home, and for what? They had lost so many years because of him. He’d let his fear and arrogance nearly destroy them both, running from the one thing he can’t live without. He could’ve had all of this, all of Tony so long ago. 

And then Tony leans up to kiss him again and Steve breaks. His breath rushes out of him with a sigh as Tony's lips press softly against his own, and his thrusts slow to a stuttering stop. Steve doesn’t realize there are tears running down his face until Tony is brushing them away with the pads of his fingers, heartbreakingly undeservingly gentle. 

“Beloved,” Tony murmurs, kissing Steve’s cheek. “What’s wrong?”

Steve doesn’t know how to explain his emotions in that moment but he tries. “Everything is right,” he finally replies and Tony’s eyes are impossibly soft in the low dark. 

“I love you, you know that?” Tony says, and Steve does know that. 

The words both ease and tighten the vise around his chest, and there are still tears dripping down his cheeks even as Tony shushes him gently and cups his face with both hands, one flesh and one metal. Steve presses a kiss to each palm before forcing himself to meet Tony’s eyes. 

“I love you, and I forgive you,” Tony says. 

The words break Steve’s heart open like a ruptured dam and he shudders as he pulls Tony close. Tony has said those words before, he’d forgiven Steve before, but hearing it now when he’s still inside Tony fractures another unreachable part of him, even as he’s healing whole, his cracks sealing with seams of gold. This forgiveness is the worst punishment and greatest gift Tony can ever give him, and he doesn’t deserve this. 

Before Steve can give that thought a voice, Tony who knows him so well, says gently, “you don’t get to decide if I should forgive you. Because I do.”

The earlier heavy rush is gone and in its place is a slow steady burn that Steve wants to keep for the rest of their lives. There’s still an edge of desperation beneath the newly gentle way Steve handles Tony, his touches tender and reverent, but his eyes are still wild and full of wonderment. Steve definitely doesn’t deserve to have this. How in the world did he get so lucky to have someone like Tony who’s given him more than his fair share of second chances?

He hopes Tony knows how much he loves him too as he kisses him again and again, pressing the words to Tony’s lips and jaw. Tony gasps beneath him, his mouth kiss bruised cherry red as Steve rocks into him long and slow. 

“Marry me,” Steve says afterwards, their limbs still tangled together. 

Tony's eyes are wide and shocked and there’s a strangled laugh wrenched from his throat. “W-what?”

“Please,” Steve says, begging now. “Will you marry me?”

“A little soon, isn’t it, Cap?” 

“It’s been almost eleven years, Tony, but I would like it to be forever,” Steve replies. “I love you so much.” His heart is pounding in his throat but he’s never felt more sure of anything before in his life. 

Tony doesn’t say anything for a moment, but he does pull Steve down for another long kiss. 

“Yes, Steve, yes,” Tony finally says, and his words feel like absolution for Steve’s frayed soul.

#this prob isn't as sexy as you wanted anon gklhadkhgasg #omgggggg tumblr formatting is such a mess #tattoo au #stony #superhusbands #stevetony #my fic #my drabble #ask #Anonymous