#one day i wont feel so bad about myself anymore 😔

[peachysuho]

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#one day i wont feel so bad about myself anymore 😔 #i have a lot of genuine confidence but it tends to cover up the deeply rooted insecurities i still have but often forget are still there #so its like i dont know what to do when im faced with it anymore #i just hate how focusing on one insecurity brings me down entirely #and its never just an insecurity like ‘i hate my legs :/‘ or something #its always some really stupid and deep seated insecurity i forget i even have. but then it just throws my whole self off entirely? and i #dont know how to handle it #and it hurts because i have so much confidence but i can shoot myself down so easily #especially because i feel like i have to be this Certain Person now and when im not ‘myself’ sometimes it feels like the amanda i KNOW i #am just somehow doesnt exist anymore. i dont know how to explain it #im just so fucking tired of worrying over NOTHING and letting it eat away at me over and over and over again #i can stress about the SIMPLEST things and it ends up turning into this whole drama about how much i hate myself or how worried i #am over XYZ things #im just so tired. im really tired #it feels like deep down i will never just be able to breathe and let go #whatever who fucking cares lmaoooo #going to bed before the suicidal thoughts start kicking in 🤣👌🏼 #ill go back to therapy one day when i feel like paying for it ig