#only a little...but just know i am thinking only of them rn

[strangleetomz]

lee!Charlie ler!Alastor with 5 (“Sorry, was I tickling you?”) please?

YES YES YES YE SYEESHFJFJSJFJSHR AAAAHAHHHHHHHRHEHHFJFJSJFJSHFHDJ

they’re literally my favs rn. i see father daughter dynamic when i see them and NOBDOY EVER LISTENS TO ME WHEN I SAY IT🤬🤬🤬

here is a friendly reminder that this is a STRICTLY SFW & PLATONIC FIC!!! and it is NOT to be viewed otherwise!

this has been in my drafts for months.

Alastor had grown quite.. accustomed, as he would say it, to the ‘wayward souls’ in the Hazbin Hotel.

But he found himself bonding with Charlie more than anyone.

She’s a nice girl to be around, he must admit.

..So now Alastor has found himself sitting on the edge of Charlie’s bed, Charlie on the floor infront of him, and him tying Charlie’s hair into her signature 3-sectioned ponytail as she rambled to him about new ideas for the hotel.

“—And since we’ve kind of practiced apologizing, you know, with you and Sir Pentious, I was thinking we do a lesson on forgiveness!” Charlie turned her head a little to check that Alastor was listening.

“What a wonderful idea, my dear!” Alastor exclaimed. “And I can assure you, Charlie, I am listening to your little rambles, no need to continuously check! You turning around, it may mess up the way this will look.”

“Oh, right! Sorry,” Charlie chuckled lightly and turned back around.

Alastor brushed his fingers through Charlies hair as he sectioned it, not paying too much attention as to what he was doing; He has done Charlie’s hair countless of times now, it was like muscle memory. He didn’t feel a need to pay attention.

The sound of a small squeak and Charlie jolting her head forward is what made Alastor suddenly feel he needed to pay attention.

“Are you alright, my dear? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Alastor leaned forward to get a better look at Charlie’s face as he let go of her hair.

“No, no, it’s okay, Al. Your finger just kinda brushed my neck, it didn’t hurt.” Charlie turned and gave Alastor a reassuring smile, Alastor raised a brow.

“Sorry, was I tickling you?” The deer smiled, almost chuckling as he saw Charlie’s smile just barely falter.

“Only a little!” She quickly reassured, “It’s okay, I promise.”

Alastor hummed. “Well, again, I do apologize. It won’t happen again, dear.” His tone was too genuine for Charlie not to believe, and Alastor then continued with her hair.

Foolish of Charlie, really, to believe the known manipulator.

After a few moments, Alastor, now intentionally, dragged a few fingers along the back of her neck.. then acted like nothing happened.

“Hehey! Alastor!?” Charlie flinched and turned to face Alastor. Alastor smiled.

“Yes, my dear?” The Radio Demon tilted his head with mock-confusion.

“Nothing.. Anyways, so I was thinking we….” Charlie continued her rambling, brushing off Alastor’s action as another accident.

With Charlie being oblivious to her surroundings, Alastor took it upon himself to summon two of his tendrils and slowly, quietly, bring them to poke Charlie’s sides before they disappeared. Charlie squeaked and jolted back against Alastor’s leg.

“Alastor! Okay, that was definitely on purpose!” The princess turned around and pointed an accusing finger at Alastor.

“Well, I do apologize, dear. However, you cannot expect me not to tickle you upon finding out you possess such sensitivity!” The deer chimed, deciding that finishing Charlie’s hair can wait. In the moment, this was more important.

“Wait, Al? Alastor, no. NonononOHOHO!” Charlie squealed as she was suddenly lifted into Alastor’s lap, ten fingers gently yet firmly digging into her sides to make her shriek with laughter.

“My, my, what a discovery! And an adorable one at that; I can’t believe you’ve kept this hidden for so long!” Alastor smiled politely, as if he wasn’t causing the princess of Hell to squeal and laugh at his mercy. He brought a hand up to her ribs, his fingers vibrating against the spaces between each bone. He couldn’t help but quietly chuckle along, Charlie’s laughter was truly contagious and he did find the situation quite amusing.

“AHALASTOR! Ihihit tihickles!” Charlie’s eyes squeezed tightly shut as she endured the ‘torture.’ However, Alastor couldn’t help but notice that the princess wasn’t exactly trying to stop him.

“Well, I believe that is the point in tickling you, dear! It’s supposed to tickle!” Alastor beamed. “You know, Charlie, I seem to have noticed something with you.”

Charlie would have raised an eyebrow in confusion had she not been being tickled silly. “Whahat!?”

“You’re not exactly trying to stop me, now are you?”

Well, shit.

“Do you like this, dear?” Alastor queried, his ears perked in expectance for a quiet response. He slowed the tickling, beginning to gently trace shapes on Charlie’s sides so she can muster up something to say with little-to-no struggle.

“Mahaybe..?” The Princess could feel the heat rise to her cheeks. She didn’t have to look at Alastor to know how he was looking at her.

“Aww, how adorable! Well, now I have to continue!” Alastor was quick to start scribbling his claws across Charlie’s stomach, eliciting a squeal and loud, happy laughter from the princess.

“Alastohohor! NohOHO!” Charlie squirmed in Alastor’s lap, keeping her face hidden in her hands.

“Oh, let me see that smile, darling! You’re never fully dressed without a smile~!” Alastor grinned, and used one hand to hold both of Charlie’s hands away from her face. He made sure to hold on gently, so that she could move away if she really wanted to.

“Thihis is cheheheating!” Charlie whined as her hands were held away, but she let it happen. Alastor’s smile was fond, before suddenly becoming mischevious as he blew a quick raspberry on the crook of the princess’s neck. He cackled with her, humoring himself.

Eventually, Charlie did pull away from Alastor, and he stopped as soon as she did. She lied next to him, a blushing mess of soft giggling. Alastor rubbed her back to soothe her, and she appreciated the gesture. The two sat in silence for a few moments as Charlie recollected herself.

And Charlie was the one who broke the silence.

“Thank you, Al,” The princess mumbled against the matress. “I- I needed that.”

Alastor hummed. “You’re welcome, darling. Now, would you like me to continue with your hair?”

“…I think I’ll just keep it down today.”

#strangleetomz #strangleetomz fics #ler!alastor #lee!charlie #hazbin hotel tickle #hazbin hotel tickling

[toomanyideasandfandoms]

I knew you'd like the idea >:3

Just imagine the characters having an intervention meeting without the creator and they bring THAT up and the notebook along with it and the entire room just goes to silence and no one know how to bring the fact that close to half of the deaths later on were of their own creator's hands.

You're right though, I def think that Sumeru would actually make the problem worse and potentially cause a relapse in which case another nation takes over and Sumeru is seen as worse or inferior for causing more pain to the creator (like the little hypocrites they are smh)

Imagine there's some pages on the old notebook of just describing how they felt and the reader can see the slow descent to madness as each death happens and it's like forbidden knowledge for them to the point that it actually like becomes risk of being lethal, so they kinda stop looking into it and just try their best to heal their creator and just leave the skeleton in the closet, per say.

I forgot to put my little thing on the last post but here it is again! I have way more ideas for sagau that i will probably never get to write so i'm happy to share them!

🍌anon

🍌 anon I want you to know that I am eating everything up cause MY GOD THE WAVELENGTHS WE'RE HAVING AAAAA

And ohhhhh ohhhhhh forbidden knowledge, your brain rn omg. CHRIST ALMIGHTLY

Some of the notes would actually be forbidden knowledge, especially if we're talking the early ones and if the creator was isekaied before Sumeru's archon quests. Omg- NO ONE CAN READ THE FIRST COUPLE OF EDITIONS, besides for Traveler-

Wait....this just made me realize something. I FORGOT TO EVER THINK ABOUT THE TRAVELER, WHAT ROLE WOULD THEY EVEN HAVE??? OH GOD HOW COULD I OVERLOOK THIS WAIT

Putting a pin in that for later (slamming my head against the wall over this)

But yeah Traveler is probably the one that creator would be closest too, because they have to be the first ones (besides Nahida or Neuvillette) to know the truth. So when the notebooks are found they're the only ones allowed to read it. So they would be at the meeting and conveying what is necessary but also keep the important parts our for the sake of the creator's privacy and to keep the forbidden knowledge from infesting again.

What probably keeps them at an advantage is the language creator uses can only be read by Traveler since Teyvat's language is usually translated for us in game in our own languages.

And also yes Sumeru would be worst, glad we agree. BUT THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE OF THE AKADEMIYA, Azar fucking sucks and would never understand. BUT- if we're talking with Alhaitham being the acting leader then there's a higher chance for them. Especially with the other Sumeru characters being there, and Nahida!! Nahida would be a godsend since she obviously would have the most knowledge, both known and unknown, and also would be able to peer review others ideas based on when she's read the memories of the creator (poor baby got traumatized tho-)

PLUS! Kuni (Wanderer name I use, making sure that's known) being our body guard, ain't no way creator is dying even if it is their wish. Combine that with Cyno also on guard duty and you got a chance of healing way better then whenever Azar (fuck that guy seriously) was in charge.

#sagau #genshin sagau #death seeking creator #others ideas #also i am very happy youre sharing this with me #i love hearing peoples ideas #this is why this blog is a dumping sight for ideas #let us all scream at each other over every potential a story could have #🍌anon

[d10nyx]

1,000 Follower Special !!

guys i genuinely can't believe we hit 1,000 followers !! my journey on tumblr has only really just begun, but i feel like i made so many cool friends along the way, and i'm forever grateful to everyone that interacts with my blog !!

i literally am smooching all of you rn, can't believe i came back after (admittedly the world's shortest) break </3 i don't even know what to say other than thank you - you guys give me the motivation to write and make bots and just push through on this app when people get weird.

so... i thought i'd do a little something? i wasn't sure exactly what to do, but i think i had an idea that would be pretty fun? i mean obvs bot requests are always open, but i thought maybe of people send in some fic requests, i can compile all of them into the poll, and i'll write a long one-shot of the winner !!

SO !! feel free to send in some ideas in the asks - as long as it follows my blog guidelines, i'll add it to the poll :3 fandoms can be any of the ones i've written for previously (or some baldur's gate requests if you're feeling up to it bcs the brainrot has been real <3)

that's all for now !! love each and every one of you :333

lots of love,

nyx xxx

#literally eternally grateful putting all of you in my pocket x

[inkskinned]

it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.

yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.

it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.

how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.

chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?

how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.

"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.

i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.

#writeblr #warm up #i can't write rn but i have SO much words in here bc im reading the chorus of dragons books #(just started book 4) #and this woman's writing is just LIVING in my brain. let me out!!! #(i read roughly like 2-4 books a week usually bc i go on long walks with my dog but when a book is REALLY good like. it eats my life. ) #anyway ...... so like here's a story that idk i've tried to explain to other people as being wild #but maybe im the only one who thinks it is wild??? #so i play pokemon go (i just started in jan) bc i love pokemon and as i have mentioned i walk goblin for like an hour in the morning #and i don't like a lot of fitness trackers due to the fact it makes me .sad. but i also wanted the little digital rewards. enter pokemon go #anyway so they make you make friends to complete quests. so i used a reddit thread. i do not usually use reddit. i don't have an acct #i lurked. i just googled like ''pokemon go reddit '' and randomly added a bunch of numbers #i was on that page for all of 15 minutes. there are THOUSANDS of responses on that page. #here's what's wild: in that group of people. even though i am not on reddit and it was one random event once #it turns out one of those people lives in the town i live in. or at least very close. i only know this because #when we send each other gifts. it's from the same freaking area. #i can't ask them to meet up bc pokemon go doesn't have a messaging app lol but like . what are the fucking chances that #a random person posts in a random reddit thread and HAPPENS to get added by someone ELSE from their SAME TOWN #who by pure fucking CHANCE is ALSO playing pokemon go and looking for friends #i googled it there's only 42000 people in my broad region. the .......... smallness ! of the world!!!

[foreverppl]

Moodboard for Jinnah Beatty (they/she), lead singer of ethereal goth band Mayday Malady.

@infamous-if

Playlist

#romancing august I think but we’ll see what oriana is saying when the updated demo comes out hehe #some quick facts: #they usually go by their last name #her goal with her style is to be constantly mistaken for a beautiful ghost #lots of long skirts/dresses + layers. gossamer looking fabric etc. only ever wears black or white #on stage she’s also usually wearing a mourning veil bc of course she is #half of her love of music comes from the spectacle of it. like being able to construct a persona and exist in it for a little while #like playing make believe #they make a lot of their own clothes. if they weren’t doing music they’d definitely be doing something in fashion. #she deeply deeply hates being misunderstood or having her words/actions be twisted so she’s like pulling her hair out rn lmao #the band’s songs are pretty high usually so she always secretly finds it funny when fans try to sing along and are off key or something lol #the only tattoo they have is seven’s initials and she doesn’t really plan on getting any others #they’re hesitant abt being a positioned as the leader bc sometimes she has issues with reeling in her emotions #and responding reasonably in the moment. #anyway she can’t relate to the loser mc allegations she’s the coolest mf on the scene tbh #but I am sorta… scared for them. #on account of the horrors that are yet to come #bc truthfully they don’t know any coping mechanisms that aren’t just ‘ignore it until it goes away’ lmao #one of the things she is currently ignoring to the best of their ability is seven #if: infamous #mb #mc: jinnah beatty (infamous)

[catboyfurina]

focalette / neuvalors whatever the ship name is orz

#beeep #gi #query #i am a trans guy furina truther and i think a lot of fanon neuvalors is really focused on a sort of. somewhat misogynistic (imo) stereotype #idk a lot of fanon seems to really like Big Strong Protector Man and Hysterical Little Emotional Woman #and thaaats not up my alley BUT I SHALL ELABORATE ON WHAT IS ! #first of all. i think both of them have feelings and emotions and shit. when fanon is like here are fontaines crybabies that fanon is like #yea. you get it this time #i think furina is really invested in pretending to be who he thinks fontaine wants as an archon #and i think part of that is pretending to be a cis woman. and i think that is also why he's so dramatic and over the top in part #fontaine wants a spectacle so he gives them a spectacle but (as seen by the fountain) does hide the less entertaining side #(or the side that he can't bear to let become entertainment) #and i think he doesn't and or can't hide as much of that from neuvillette #i think when theyre both tired and alone furina can drop the exaggeration . and that. that specifically is soooooo #and tying into the trans headcanon i think nvl is the only one who knows #i still dont think furina has said everything but like. neuvillette being the only one past that first incredibly high wall. yeag #and neuvillette is imo one of those people that likes ppl that are annoying (cough cough just like me fr fr rn) #buuuuut ngl i havent thought as hard about neuvis end of it #...i dont think theyd be together currently in canon tho this is one of those slowburn bait things #also. i don't think furinas a kid pensive emoji. i know its popular on like half the fandom but nnnot my headcanon #i dont think hes acting childish in a child way i think hes acting childish in a clown way #.....hopefully this isnt my sinister!baizhu headcanon moment that ages soooo poorly ahdsjfjshsgh

[silenthillbunni]

📓🕯️🐇🖤pt.2

#only 30 tags lol i ran out... so furthermore #we only get one life. im gonna try as much as i can to enjoy the little moments. nd to not give up on myself nd my life #i will die one day anyway. why rush it. i'll enjoy as many books and as many walks and songs and tv shows as possible #if i get a loan nd have more money i wanna bleach my hair nd dye my hair green #and later this year i think i might change my name #it was the name i wanted to change to from the beginning. but i was in such a bad headspace i just picked eden at random #i do kinda like it now nd im attached to it but i more feel like this other name actually is me. my birth name nd my current name dont feel #really right. so maybe. i havent decided yet. like i rlly dont know. im also attached to this name for some other reason. like it's who i am #to a person i rlly like and if i change... will i be anything to them? i cant put it into words but that makes me hesitate #but it's unhealthy to stay attached to someone i cant truly have even if i want to. so i mean. idk im just weird abt it #but i do kinda wanna change my name (to embla. my mom wanted to give me that name but my dad was like nooo >.<) i am not 100% sure tho so #when i've been getting used to going to school nd working out at the gym. nd after my surgery nd i have more energy #i will try to face my avpd and try apps for making friends. there r two apps where u can find new girl friends!! maybe i can try that #also like i've never tried apps but i think maaaaaybe i can use bumble to try to find friends and women to date. potentially. idk..... #rn it's hard for me to think in those terms bc. i mean i am hung up on someone!!!! i cant evwn imagine dating or being intimate w anyone els #sometimes i feel like.. they're the only person i've ever felt like it'd even be possible. who i'd event want to do that w #not only physically but emotionally. so ig it's even harder to let go bc im so scared i will never feel like that w anyone else #but i rlly need to try to make the most of whatever life i have. the world will collapse soon anyway #that makes me even more sad that i cant be w who i wanna be w nd do what i wanna do but #all pain will all be completely descimated eventually. it's not forever bc life isnt forever #i've just never felt this before. like i want smth to be real so bad but if it happened once surely it can happen again? right? #i wont spend my life alone without intimacy and love and comfort nd support nd understanding right???? :o hope not #im still so sad nd exhausted rn. nothing in my life is working nd theres no repreive nd no help #it gets sooo hard to endure everything sometimes when everything just keeps piling up and gets so heavy it feels like im drowning #nd atm i dont feel like i have any anchor. nothing that keeps me grounded nd im just floating away nd im constantly being overwhelmed by my #feelings nd emotions. im like a stupid little kid who dont understand how to handle what im feeling. or make rational decisions #i feel so ... stupid and useless. i dont know what im doing. i have no idea. i have no compass. its so scary

[astrxealis]

okay rambles but i started creatively writing in like ... 5th grade? and. oh god just a little encouragement to anyone looking to get into writing or insecure or whatnot, but HELLS, maybe it's to he expected with my (obviously) very young age and inexperience with writing then, but my writing was really. yeah. Yeah. but then i'm what... a lot older now, obviously, and my writing has gotten leagues better. i'm probably not a good example for this bcs childhood years development stuff are different etc etc BUT practicing writing more and whatnot really does go a long way :]

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #my writing in 2020 is a lot different than my writing now even! especially so compared to my writing from 2010s #reading a lot of media is also really important :] i always read a lot of books BUT i only started to really read poetry since the pandemic #which were uh basically my early teenage years so idk if i'm a good example for this bcs childhood brain development and stuff (???) #BUT STILL ..... playing games like ffxiv and being really invested in the lore and writing + reading more poems and being fascinated with #more authors and pieces of literature + expanding my general vocabulary knowledge whatnot ... it all really goes a long way! #oh man i'm pretty proud of myself actually. i do love my writing. as imperfect (as all things are) it is. #i had a lot of Pauses with writing throughout my uhh relatively short life thus far since i'm NOT yet an adult and all aha but yeah! #so bless ffxiv again for bringing back my writing spirit... and other medias and whatever <3 #rn i have to thank bg3 for bringing back my Creative Spirit bcs i've been writing a lot more again and having/working on my creative ideas!! #okay i just wanted to ramble a bit lol ^_^ there! #idk my being a writer is very important to me. and my journey as one too. #i want to make a book one day! most feasibly would be to make a collection of short stories :] a bit similar to 'm is for magic' maybe bcs #i grew up with that lol neil gaiman i adore you <3 #i have a very special original world in my head but i am a little selfish and want to keep them all to myself... oops. or who knows! #anyway i have a lot of ideas and i adore writing and literature sooo much <3 #anyway. okay. leaving it here. #cheering on every writer author whatever out there !!! unless you're a sucky person of course yuck bigots but yeah ^^ <3 #huge writing inspo for me is uhhhhhhhh. thinking #ffxiv! does ffxiv count. esp drk quests. and shb as a whole. and then... edgar allan poe? neil gaiman? yeah? #can't remember anyone else good gods but i love vivid and imaginative storytelling and writing descriptively :] a bit of prose but also #quite simple in its eloquence (???) unsure honestly oh gods anyway BYE rambles over apollo signing off beep boop AGHHHHH (screams)

[astridthevalkyrie]

feeling like you’re 12 when you’re 22 is genuinely such a humiliating experience.

#my dad and mom have been on my case ab asking for permission before I go places and it makes me kinda sick #seeing everyone around me make plans or whatever and then being like ‘I’ll have to ask 🥺 👉🏽👈🏽 #’ #and my dad’s a liar he’s like it’s not like we ever say no #except my mother does and so does he??? #even the muslim girls I am friends with have more freedom and you know what’s amazing ab this is #they can’t stop me from going to school. they don’t pay for that #they can’t take my car. they don’t pay for that #my mom can stop making food for me and I will manage just fine #they wanna kick me out???? blessing in disguise #but it’s hilarious that as an adult i’m still paying for everything I use but I still have to ask permission genuinely fuck off #my parents when I have to stay late on campus for some school event: 😒 #the way I’d be making money rn if they didn’t decide to come and stalk me at work and see me without my hijaab on #and that one’s on me I could choose to just work with it on and make them happy #but I literally can’t as a matter of principle #i’m given such little pride as it is and if I say I don’t want to work with a hijaab on that’s that #i got an internship two days ago for the summer and you can bet your ass I’m not wearing my hijaab #except it’s not paid #and as much as I have guilt spending I really don’t spend a lot and it makes me so angry #i know that your 20s isn’t your whole life and people shouldn’t think that if they waste their 20s their life is up #but it’s like #my teens were already so shitty and abusive and trapped #how much longer do I have to deal w this before i’m treated like an adult #trick question! it’s only until a man can own me bc then he can make my decisions instead of them <3

[whumpy-wyrms]

hey guys

#man i am such a sleepy fella rn #i sure hope i’m not a clone and the real me doesn’t come into my room and kill me tonight! #/j #genuinely thank u all for ur reactions. like u all are excited to read new chapters and IM excited to read ur reactions #its always my favorite part #makes me so happy to see people enjoying my characters and story it’s literally a dream come true like wow #i’m so happy people like chapter 14 and thanks for all the amazing comments and stuff it makes me sooo happy #i’m too eepy but yeah that’s what i wanted to say :) #wyrms says stuff #i’ve also had anton brainrot specifically him as a Little Guy so i might finally finish that borrower basil au thing when they first meet #cuz it’s super wholesome and i think u all need that LOLLL #also. only like 7 of you will know what i’m talking about but anton as a kid is literally just louie in a different font like wow they are #soooo similar #not present day anton tho. just him as a little guy #literally him and louie would’ve been best friends AUGHH MY HEART #i’m gonna draw them interacting because that would literally heal me that would change my life #none of you understand how important this is to me like. holy shit #anyway reminder that things might be rough for dew right now haha but he gets a happy ending don’t stress abt it!! #the next 4 chapters specially might be a bit darker than usual #but then mystery character!!!!!!!! FUCK YESSS!!!!!! #excited :)

[lulubeanie]

I am my own art's biggest fan btw

#duck speaks #I mean it when I say I love my art #I think it is quite nice. and I like to look at it #many times I will just like. go into my gallery and stare at my most recent drawings #I will also go and look at my art posts whenever they get new notes #I just really like how I'm drawing rn #and it means I get to look at my favorite guys because well. you know I am drawing them and only them #I would recommend this method of um. get obsessed with your own art a little #it's good for you

[wraithsoutlaws]

*gently pokes*

Can I have some dagger and dumdum ideas you want to share but haven’t had the chance to yet…?

yes!!! yes absolutely!!! lemme think here lemme try and dig into what i haven't really talked about hm.....hm hm...here are a couple 🤲

for starters, something i really wanna tackle at some point when i stop being a baby and actually try digging around with modding is a little 'x' tattoo that they both share on their chests. just something small and a little messy because they give it to each other stick-n-poke style one night while they're drinking. dagger's is harder to see but it's beside the anatomical heart tattoo (closer to where his heart actually is). in typical fashion they don't ever really tell anyone about what it means (and they never really talked about it themselves) but they both quietly take it as a reflection of their love and belonging to each other.

even though their ship name is 'perfect drug' (NIN song) their actual ~canon song together is ring of fire (social distortion cover), which i think just suits the inevitability of their love, even when it's painful. someday in the future al's band performs this for them at dagger's horror circus UwU

#x: perfect drug #this is only a little im sorry 🥺 #well i was going to get into a point in their timeline where dagger thinks dd is dead and the results of that but #it probably warrants its own post..... #wow just realizing that they both have a moment in their lore where they think the other is dead rip. #DID i ever mention?? that when dagger gets locked up then put into psychiatric program dd hacks into the camera feeds #just so he can See him #(this happens when they sort of. are on a ~break~ of sorts) but dd hears about this and WORRIES and misses him #anyway anyway....im always happy to share about them #i am also still apologizing for the other message in my inbox re: smuttier thoughts about them #I PROMISE IM NOT IGNORING i just keep forgetting to formulate those thoughts #brain kinda crazy rn. holidays as you know. also we got a new kitten so ive been a bit frazzled. #but ty ty <3

[ladythespera]

so i should have been finishing my citizenship application but instead i blazed through a bunch of online autism diagnosis tests (bc i've seen my friends doing it for months now and i knew that if i didn't do it quicklyyy i would angst over it for another 3 months)

in conclusion: first of all, for the RAADS-R test, i definitely scored above the threshold, and for most other tests as well. second of all: it went okay, but i do still really hate standardized tests about personality/mental stuff (i don't hate standardized tests in general even if i think they're not the best means of info gathering, and for some subjects i love them)(ie. for pathophysiology good, for literature bad). but it's just a constant struggle of second-guessing questions all the time, and to be honest, so many questions feel like they do not even apply to me in the first place, or are somewhat skewed by context/background.

e.g., do i enjoy social events/gatherings? well, usually yes! because they're so rare.

do i like having friends? yes!! bc i know so many friends who are also into my specific interests and projects that we can collaborate on.

anything academic or social related i think is also skewed by the fact that, well, i was homeschooled in K-12 and got to dive into school as much as i wanted and as much as was expected of me (which was apparently a lot, but, not forced?? my parent never hovered, in fact was quite hands-off, but they simply assumed we would take to it, and we did). in standardized testing in the 6th grade i was already scoring at a post-high school level (i.e. post-12th grade) in every subject, but i don't think that was any extraordinary achievement, that was simply a 'we must be doing a good job' result. no one in my family thinks that's abnormal, and i don't even think that myself; in fact, they (immigrants) would probably just say the US standards are abysmally low. i enjoy social situations now, but again, it's the social situations i choose to put myself into. why go to a social situation i dislike?

i felt that way about many questions - like, for example, can i tell if someone is getting bored by what i'm saying? yes, but will that stop me talking? depends. do i have difficulty doing something that doesn't interest me? you fool, i will simply make it into something that does interest me.

finally, there's age-related changes. as a child i used to be extremely scrupulous regarding scheduling, lists, room cleanliness, grammar, rules, etc. but as an adult i have loosened up considerably although i still like predictability.

the only thing that i find consistent is that i tend to have extremely strong interests in things. there wasn't any need for me to give my 9th grade teacher a cellular breakdown of how milk is created in a project on farm animals (listen - they asked how milk is created !!! it must mean on a DETAILED level right?), but i wanted to. for the record, the bibliography alone on that project reached 4 pages (wheeze). but to be honest, and i mean this sincerely, i am continuously surprised that this is apparently not how most people feel. to me, if the teacher is great and the subject is one you like, why wouldn't you? i wondered if it was instead that the class was just not the right fit for some students, and therein lies the problem - is it neurodivergence, or is it just the right environment that encourages specific interests? and, even if i am ND, i don't think i ever even thought of it while i was in k-12, bc i simply felt like all my 'eccentricities/interests' were encouraged. and so now in college i feel no need to hide anything. i would proudly march into my patho class in my flamboyant doctor who get-up or jedi robe - and then still do well. it does feel performative, but after all, i am in theatre for now...

i will say the one impression i strongly came away from in all this: my parents would probably both score MUCH higher on these (i have basically no sensory issues; my mom definitely does)(my dad is extremely precise and organized - but also, he is German ManTM).

#also i forgot to mention - my RAADS-R score was 99 and my cat-q was 112 #the thresholds are 65 and 100 respectively (i also took a bunch of other tests there but i won't list them all) #not terribly high but again i feel like i have spent. so little time really in the same social situations others are typically in. #rn i am very much isolated at home and i'm sure if i were back in a job i would start feeling more challenged again #personal #delete later #autism #also if i see anyone 🤡-ing abt homeschoolers all being asocial or awkward or uneducated...No and only other hs'ers are allowed an Opinion #some of us in fact were around before Covid made everyone think online classes were just poor irl substitutes #also interesting that u would mock a group where in fact so many ppl i know later turned out ND hm

[heybaetae]

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#i've been in a manic state for over a month #haven't slept in my own bed for 30 days #was barely eating/sleeping the first half and now i'm eating/sleeping too much #i was even off twitter for two weeks which is so hilariously unlike me #said i was taking a gif hiatus because my brain was so unhealthy #then turned around and started making/posting MASS amounts of gifsets (published and drafted) for very little payoff #like. More often than i usually do to the point where i feel like it's overwhelming or annoying or looks desperate but hey maybe i am #for the serotonin #except nobody reblogs shit which. Well you know how that goes #it is what it is but it's also making me feel so so so low #but i can't stop either because it's the only thing keeping my brain off of everything #i also recorded that voiceover video of my gif process but i don't think i'm gonna post it because i hate my voice and my overall Being rn #and publishing something like that would be inviting literally anyone to have a negative thought or opinion of my voice or my personality #which is a big No Thank You atm #even tho i have nice followers i also have total dickwads waiting to jump me lately for the stupidest shit lol #so the timing is just bad bc everything else is bad my mental health is bad my self esteem is bad #my gifs and the engagement on them is pretty bad without me reblogging them 50 times myself but we ball #it's all just!!!! it all feels Bad i just want to feel sane lol

[selkiecoded]

a sumi haircut variation ive been testing out. i wanna say its a bit post-canon, not too far off, maybe a year or so. hasnt quite figured out what to do with herself yet, but shes getting there. only a little ways away from graduation.

#the clock chimes at midnight #selk.art #okay because im going stir crazy in my beautiful mind here. i forgot where everyone in the royal ending went so ive just kinda been doing a #post canon au based entirely arnd sumire and the only person whos really gone is ren. the others are in school and stuff still lol #ANYWAYS she and ren start dating a few weeks before 2/3 and after they restore the world its a very tumultuous start considering ren #immediately gets sent to jail. even after he gets out theyre both grieving akechi + it feels like theyre just going through the motions. #everyones like omg we could tell this was gonna happen! and it makes them uncomfortable for reasons they cant articulate #ren is using sumire to get over akechi + sumire is modeling rens identity + both see akechi in the other and are sad abt it #on top of all that they get into a huge fight when sumire learns rens leaving in like. a month. and she didnt know. #(he genuinely didnt realize she didnt know but gets bitchy in return) #they try to make it work long distance for a month/two but eventually mutually breakup (both a little bitter but agree to remain friends) #overall its a cute relationship with um . very odd undertones. #anyways she still wears her hair straight up or straight down during all that point. HAHAHA remember this is abt hair! #after ren leaves she latches onto ann + ryuji who are still going to school w her. and after the breakup simply bc #ryuji is a Boy and sumire is a Girl and They Enjoy Being Around Each Other they both reflexively think abt getting together #sumire starts to imitate him (bc for some weird reason she keeps wanting to be like boys!) and ryuji is like am i breaking bro code rn.. #nothing ever happens bc neither actually wants to date the other and ann is always hanging around but its an odd time for everyone #she bleaches the tips of her hair for a little bit but its so small when she gets it chopped off its like nothing happened lol #this is probably around third year when ann/ryuji have graduated and the only thief around is futaba. #and. please nobody kill me for this. i think the two have interesting thematic similarities but the ship between them has always felt like #pairing the same-age spares to me. and i havent read anything thats convinced me of its full potential yet. #that to say i think theyre friendly but not super close. so sumire has to learn to just. exist by herself for the first time in years. #like i said this is probably when this actual haircut starts getting used. shes figuring it out! #after she graduates shes the first one to find akechi again and theyre both doing a lot better and become very close. #they move in together! platonically! unless...? but thats not the point! akechi helps her realize shes transmasc at which point she gets a #real short haircut. i cant decide. theres one thats like a curly haired bob almost and one thats shorter + looks kinda windswept #and thats all the haircut hcs i have for her postcanon timeline! spreads hands jazz hands. not all the timeline hcs but my thumbs r tired.

[killjoy-prince]

Manga haul!! I did end up going on my usual bookstore trip!!

#prince's talk tag #bloom into you continues to elude me. i need 6-8 and they only had 8 #i am excited to catch up with sasaki bc i really wanna read the spinoff but i held off until i was caught up #after catching up with witch hat i wanted to continue it asap so i was able to find the next two i needed #idk was she and her cat is but it looks cute #last gender i was reading it online but they didnt have all the chapters even tho the 3rd vol said it was the last one #and i wanna see how it ends #you know i sold a few books at a second hand shop and they gave like pocket change for all of them #im a little annoyed but whatever at least theyre out of my hands #they didnt take one of them bc i think it was too trashy of a manga for them to sell like its just sex really #but i took care of it. i kinda figured they wouldn't but their website didnt specify if theyd take very mature books so i tried it out #and now i know #thats the current vol of classmates out rn after that ill be caught up #i saw the pet agency one on amazon amd didn't know what it was but it was at the bnn with the big selection so why not #something interesting about that bnn so it has 4 floors and the manga is on the 4th floor so i gotta take the escalators up #and on the second floor was a lego statue of h*rry p*tter holding the trans and genderfluid flags #the area this bnn is in is lgbtq+ friendly. having multiple tables and sections in the store dedicated to lgbtq+ books #and even decorating the tables and bannisters with pride flags #im wondering if the made him hold those flags as a fuck you to the author #bc its not like the store wanted to put it up. it was most likely an order from home office #who knows? i dont work there