#or maybe don't my heart can't take it

[kyouka-supremacy]

Valentine's cards inspired by the most romantic chapters of the manga

#Please don't pay attention to the messy redraws this was done in a rush ///// #ryūnosuke akutagawa #bsd #bungou stray dogs #my edit #mine #Another time I would have added hearts and maybe a little lace frame but I really can't afford it today ;;;;;; #Anyways take this congrats Akutagawa for inventing unrequited romance </3 #Edit: Oh I forgot to tag... #sskk #shin soukoku #Obvs... #bsd ch 84-88 #bsd valentines

[bylertruther]

society if the duffers had gone through with their original plan to have mike go to the upside down in s1 to find will

#byler #it's enough for me to know that he WOULD but i still would have liked to see it........ but i guess there's still s5..... sniffles n cries #when will's ankle gets caught in a vine n vecna goes YOINK n u just see mike's eyes go crazy wide as he starts sprinting after him faster #than he ever has tripping stumbling falling in a very mike fashion but he keeps going n he doesn't make it in time but it doesn't matter #it doesn't matter bc he's NOT going to lose will again he's NOT going to lose him on HIS watch a-fucking-gain he won't he CAN'T #and maybe it's a party affair so he looks back at lucas n dustin who are almost there and they're screaming after #him BECAUSE MIKE WAIT STOP MIKE WE DON'T HAVE THE RIGHT WEAPONS but mike just furrows his brow and goes in #bc he's the heart he's the paladin he's going to lead them and he's going to save will because will needs him but also he needs will #and. and um. well. then i fucking die of course #OR COULD U IMAGINE IF will goes on a solo mission and he thinks he's managed to sneak away but mike pops up like 'what are you doing? 🤨' #bc he always sees will and he always knows when something is up and it's a crazy plan but they did say crazy together and that they'd be a #team no matter what and that they would kill vecna so liek. do u see what im saying are u seeing my visions are u feeling my insanity rn . #they get surrounded or trapped somewhere and will casts fog cloud n saves the party like he did in a previous campaign. etc etc #dustin is their bard who has snacks n keeps things lighthearted mike leads the way n will is at his side n lucas is their eyes n ears n it' #almost like one of their campaigns bc the show started with that and those were their roles when will was missing and now it'll end #like that and so on n so forth. nods mhm mhm #takes deep breath ok back 2 studying i go byeeee

[gwydionae]

Never have I been more grateful that time travel exists in the X-Men universe.

#marvel #x-men 97 #spoilers #...don't read my tags XD #most of the spoilers will be down here #i liked the x-men cartoon since i was a kid in the 90s #but i can't lie i mostly watched it for specific characters #if an episode didn't have any of those characters involved the chances of me enjoying it went down significantly #wasn't universal but a pretty darn good bet you know? #they gave me morph back for which i am grateful #and rogue has been my Best Girl TM for decades #but i swear i would be developing a sudden loss of interest after the latest episode if not for the whole #'this sort of thing almost never sticks in comics' and we literally saw cable right before crap hit the fan #now maybe it won't be time travel #maybe there's some other comic book story that could be used here that i'm unfamiliar with #(i know very little in regards to x-men comics - my heart resides with the batfam) #but either way being Old and Jaded is seriously working in my favor right now so i'll take it XD #(the end totally got me though like uuuuuuuuuuugh noooooooooo whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy *cries*)

[marshmallowgoop]

Every time I "finish" an AMV, I create a comparison like this.

The left side is the "effectless" draft—minimal transitions, zero coloring, limited text animation—while the right side is the "final" version I post online. It's a way to assess my work; where did the added effort elevate the edit, and where do my eyes find themselves drawn more to the draft because the "final" version is too busy, too overwhelming, too much?

I'm new to video editing. There aren't even 20 AMVs to my name, and I only seriously started a little over a year ago. My process involves a lot of struggling with what a "good" AMV is, a lot of wondering if I'm doing it all wrong—anxieties that were only exacerbated by a popular post that crossed my dash many months ago. It decried AMVs that don't edit with the full song as worthless, bad, garbage. The kids don't know how to do it right.

Not a kid, but maybe they've got a point!

Still, it was a disheartening sentiment to read. And while I might not know much, I think I am confident in knowing this: there are many AMV styles out there, and the shorter ones may certainly not be everyone's cup of tea, but that doesn't mean that they're devoid of love, time, effort, or passion. The video at the top of this post is hardly 30 seconds long, and it still took over 60 hours of spilling out ideas and cutting clips and learning new skills and scrapping new skills and tweaking transitions and coloring and recoloring and shaking my head and giving up and trying again.

Fan vidders, no matter the style they employ, are devoting their free time and energy to create. It'd be ludicrous to suggest that a movie is inherently inferior to a TV series, or a short story automatically meaningless compared to a novel.

The same should absolutely apply to fan videos.

#ramblings #shut up goop #video #amv #eye strain #*says she wants to write heiji and shinichi meta but writes this instead* #the heart writes what it wants ^^; #but yeah been thinking about writing something like this for a while? #tl;dr short vids may not be your thing but it really doesn't mean that they lack effort! #(if anything it might mean they have *too much* effort... definitely been guilty of that) #i'd love love love to create longer videos but i'm very attached to making edits with a high clip count and lots of effects #and that takes a *lot* of time! i can't even imagine doing a full song... that'd take me over 200 hours no exaggeration #and i know my style isn't for everyone but i don't think it's inherently worthy of disrespect #we're all fans here and i think fan vidders deserve so much love <3 constantly astounded by them! #it was really sad to see a post with nearly 50k notes complaining about amv makers when amvs on tumblr get maybe 100 notes if they're lucky #song in the video is 'corridors of time' by yasunori mitsuda with lyrics and vocals by laura shigihara #and the anime is detective conan #but if you're reading this you probably already know that haha

[kimjiwoong]

alexis just texted me and was like hey I know we see each other tomorrow but I've been overthinking this do u wanna have dinner tomorrow and I was like oh hi.. fkfjfjfdj

#he sent me like so many texts all together #but basically he was like instead of taking u home we go together back to my place #i know it's tuesdays but i promise I'll take u home early unless you don't want to do this which is fine #maybe u thought i was joking last time #i wasnt! #and at that point i was cackling but also dying from a heart attack #so i said yes no let's have dinner tomorrow #and he said he was glad because waiting for until the weekend sucked fkdjdjd #i can't stop thinking about him saying IVE BEEN OVERTHINKING #like WHAT IS GOING ON IN YOUR HEAD #my heart is racing by the way #rose.txt

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: March 15

“Over Yet" by Hayley Williams

#song of the day #very exciting to have one of my brothers tell me entirely unprompted that he's enjoying the current playlist #a very big win #I spent most of my work day today doing what I've been thinking of as 'evil rubber-ducking' #where the IT guys throw me the especially Difficult faculty members--the ones who can't be helped because they won't listen-- #and I trick them into actually talking me through what they're doing so we can find the problem and fix it #(eternally amazed by people who request help and then refuse it. you called me bud. you submitted a service request ticket on purpose. #oh you can't do your job without connecting to the vpn? that's great we can't fix it until you tell us what's fucking stopping you) #mostly this 'tricking' takes the form of me being a sweet young butter-wouldn't-melt Southern girl in over my head with mean IT guys #bless them (derogatory) these folks who won't let IT even attempt to start working through the 'have you tried' scripts #because they know they're getting something wrong but are too angry-embarrassed to admit they don't know what #are still delighted to mansplain the idea of a remote connection to me #--that's not fair. I shouldn't mischaracterize them it's mostly not mansplaining. #the two today were yankee-splaining me. city-splaining maybe. #what would a hick like me (y'all is one person. all y'all or some'a y'all for multiple people) possibly know about enterprise networks-- #anyway they were using the wrong login credentials and were so sure of themselves they'd never even tried the other set just to see #bless. their. hearts. #(IT owes me so many little favors like this now. the latest database tweak I asked for got done live while I described it to them) #anyway anyway! love the chorus on this song #'to get out of your head yes break a sweat / baby tell yourself it ain't over yet' #makes me move my head every time

[dramarants]

going through the 20th century girl tag to move on and appreciate all the great moments only to find out ppl would rather yijin died than not end up with heedo

#20th century girl #twenty five twenty one #20th century girl spoilers #spoilers #maybe I'm in a weird mood but I can't scroll any more asldkfj #I get why ppl say the movie did it better: pacing + showing aftermath + believable #even though the sadder ending was a surprise they set us up for it and have proper closure to the characters #and while I still have some gripes (what happened to the brother how did woonho diedoes the squad not stay in touch where are they all now) #overall it was solid #but idk if 25 21 pulled a 'he died' I'd be so pissed - it's lazy and thoughtless and not marrying your first love is realistic #their final scenes together were soooo good it's just the reason for parting was unbelievable & present day scenes left us with more qs #but to be like 'yijin and heedo were soulmates and their breakup is unthinkable so... #'instead of growing and moving ahead after all his struggles to establish himself and support his family he should just DIE' #like this 20th c girl ending is so much more heartbreaking imo sldkfjasdlldgfkj #watching him smile at sunrise all hopeful for a future with you he'll never have 22 years later is SO MUCH WORSE #idk I'm glad bora is shown smiling and cherishing what they had rather than mourning (tho she has every right too) but it still doesn't... #...feel like closure to me. but there really is no good parting when it comes to death huh #show me people can treasure their youth and still find happiness and fulfillment in unexpected ways down the line!! #there's a beautiful piece of 90s nostalgia media still waiting in the wings for us I just know it #just don't know how much I can take my heart being ripped to shreds in the meantime 😅 #ranting

[l48yr1nth]

Hi. Just wanted to say I really like your art. The way you use shapes is truly amazing and I love every art piece that comes up on my dash. :).

I AM. GOING. TO CRY.!

thank you and i love you and ur awesome and . i love you. :) :) :3

#labyanswering #incoming. incomprehensible ramblings #i seriously cannot say enough how much this rocks to read #i teared up a bit. maybe a sniffle #but i didn't tell you that #you. grab my heart and squeezed it a little #had to sit and take a breath for a second after reading and processing this ask #GRABS YOU #SHAKES YOU VIOLENTLY #DONT BE SO SWEET IN MY INBOX ! IM SHORT CIRCUITING AND OVERHEATING AND MALFUNCTIONING!!! #kisses u gently on the head /p #u are too sweet to me. #im going to. EXPLODE. ALL OVER. EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!! #if you ever talk to me again i will GET YOU #very very happy. veryVERY. happy. #have not been having the greatest of times (relatively) lately. u are why i keep going #i have like been struggling to keep up with my own blog lately and like. tears up a little. #i don't do art for validation but i'm NOT the social-est person so uploading and interacting is a bit of a difference from my usual self;; #and hearing that like. u guys like my stuff so much is my main (like 99%) motivation for continuing to draw and post #also this community rocks! i've made so many friends with similar interests!! I GET TO KNOW SO MANY AWESOME FUCKING ARTISTS!! #PEOPLE I FOR REAL LOOK UP TO IN TERMS OF ART TALK AND DRAW WITH ME!! #AND PEOPLE MIGHT LOOK UP TO ME AS WELL! #AND PEOPLE LIKE WHAT I MAKE! #AND I CAN SEE SO MANY THINGS OTHER PEOPLE MAKE! #THAT I LIKE SO MUCH! #im rambling so hard im sorry #but like i can't put it into words #properly at least #i may not know exactly who you are but i need you to know that i think ur awesome! u rock! #ok im up an hour past when i usually go to bed i have to GO. BYE.

[picorimori]

i hate to trash talk art programs because someone always comes out of the woodworks to tell me how an art program saved their grandma or some shit but I have to let the hate in my heart out somehow. i fucking hate procreate. i hate it so much. i long for the day drawing in it doesn't make me wanna pull out my teeth. i hate how everyone got ipads and procreate in ~2018-2020 and fucking swore by it (they did the same shit with csp every time it went on sale and then i bought it and hated that too). i hate it. its shit. when you resize lines it gets even more pixely than sai and i love sai but I hated that shit there too. i hate the lasso tool. i hate all the brushes. i hate that there isn't a proper selection tool. i hate that you can't manipulate the layer modes on 'folders'. i hate that everything is hidden in an instruction manual that doesn't exist in-app. i fucking hate this program i hate it so much. its been a year and i still hate it i fucking hate it here.

#my math prof recommended krita. it wasn't to draw. it was to write up my exams. hated that shit so much. #everything someone recommends it i want to sock their teeth out. #i hated csp. i still hate csp but at least drawing in it didn't make me constantly want to die after a year #maybe i'll find a brush that i'll be able to work with that makes me not feel this way about every art program on earth but i haven't found #or made it yet and im so frustrated. i dont hate my heart. i don't even hate drawing. #but there are so many obstacles and my brain can't take it. i can't jump these fences. im not a horse. #i meant 'i dont hate my art' not heart. i accidentally combined the words somehow

[howthesleeplesswander]

❛ i’m sorry, but i’m just thinking of the right words to say. ❜ // @Kazuma but... Masked Apprentice Kazuma?? 👀👀👀👀

Songs from the 80's Sentence Starters | Accepting! | @tenacquity

((hoooOOOWEE ARE YOU READY TO CRY?? 8'D I SURE HOPE SO, HERE WE GOOO))

The right words?

He may have laughed at the statement if he remembered how. If it weren't so cruel in its irony. For the words this man spoke didn't matter when the mere sound of his voice shook the Apprentice to his core.

Every time, without fail. After months of wandering the foggy London streets like a wraith plucked from a ghost story, the feeling of being utterly lost was never as powerful—or as weak—as in this man's presence.

He made the emptiness inside of him better, yet simultaneously worse. As the Apprentice watched him struggle to speak, he didn't recognize the churning depths of his eyes or the thoughtful crease to his brow—and that unfamiliarity ached unlike anything else. Earth-shattering, even though he couldn't understand it. Powerful enough to change everything if only he could remember.

And he wanted to, with a desperation he didn't know himself capable of feeling before their fateful meeting in the Prosecutor's Office only yesterday. But he couldn't. He'd tried. And the same thought crushed down upon his shoulders now as it did then:

What right did he have to something—to someone—he did not know?

He shouldn't be here.

He'd never intended to face him to begin with. With the halls of the Old Bailey dim and abandoned for the night, the Apprentice had been about to leave, too: prepared to spend another night searching for anything that might trigger his memories, if the other man hadn't found him first.

Wasn't this exactly what he'd wanted? No—not this. It was too much. Too painful.

The Apprentice took a step back. Then another. Each one soundless yet stilted as he battled against himself: trapped between a visceral urge to flee, to leave this man behind—and an equally powerful conviction that he couldn't. Not again.

—again?

He didn't...They didn't... Did they?

It was too much...!

In the end the Apprentice moved no further. He merely watched, dark eyes unreadable in the shadows of his mask and cloak. Silently weathering the tempest of nonsensical emotion surging through his rib cage. Waiting for something he didn't understand.

Or, perhaps, simply waiting for the right words.

#tenacquity #《⭒✩⭒ || answered ask 》 #《⭒✩⭒ || interaction: sword of justice (kazuma) 》 #《⭒✩⭒ || bond: there’s love above love and it’s ours (tenacquity) 》 #ajdsfj;sdASDLDFJSDK THIS IS FINE #I'M FINE YOU'RE FINE EVERYTHING'S /FINE/ 8'))) #catch me crying while writing this tbh 8'D BUT IT'S A GOOD KIND OF PAIN #HHHHH THESE POOR BBIESSS TTATT THEY'RE IMMEDIATELY BREAKING MY HEART I CAN'T TAKE IT #I'm still forever so mad that the game didn't do more with the two of them together at this point in the timeline #fINE WE WILL JUST DO IT OURSELVES DAMN IT 😤 #I figured this could be somewhere in the process of Harebrayne's trial?? #maybe the night after they investigate at the fairground and ryuu and susato have that lil interaction with kazuma ;; #if that works for you ofc! #also sorry this got long (again) aslkfj kazuma's immediately having a whole episode dON'T WORRY ABOUT IT #everything in him is pulling him towards ryuu #but he still can't remember him so he's just afraid and desperate and so confused T~T 💔 #tysm for sending this bby! ;3;/ feel free to continue it if you want as always!

[crown-ov-horns]

I recently found out people ship Cassandra with Apollo.

My initial reaction was...

Just tan their hides. You know what happened to her because the the bastard, don't you?..

Then, I was overwhelmed by morbid curiosity, and checked AO3. People are writing rape fics about them. ...Why?..

Could I ever see Cassandra x Apollo?.. I don't know, maybe. But, definitely not the nonsense I mentioned. Dubcon at most. I guess, he might somehow coerce her into sleeping with him, and later rescue her from the fall of Troy, because she's pregnant with his child, or something (Zeus would be pissed, I'm fine with that).

Sounds like an intriguing story, with a lot of morally questionable elements. I can imagine Apollo confiding in Artemis, wondering why his wife is so upset. She'd just go "are you serious rn?.. -_-".

...What, you're surprised I'm among those I wish to hide with a broom? Don't be. It happens quite often, actually.

#greek mythology #greek myth fandom #apollo #cassandra #apollo x cassandra #diary pages #thoughts #greek gods #this is such a fucked up pairing #in the iliad you like apollo then remember what he did cassandra #i don't blame her for rejecting his advances he's an entitled fboy with nine girlfriends and she wanted to remain chaste #the way he responded is very cruel honestly cassandra's story breaks my heart #of course i'm discussinv them as characters not religious figures #apollo can be such a creep #greek myth fanfic #fanfiction ideas #what the hell i have a hundred epics in my wips already including one with apollo #but i SHOULD put this aside the “Apollo coerces Cassandra then saves her because she's pregnant” #it's dark but also very intriguing to explore... it isn't supposed to be hot really well maybe later #dionysus married ariadne why can't apollo marry cassandra #she wouldn't want to marry him but what other choice would she have #their further relationship just seems so fascinating #yeah apollo would be confused why she's upset - he'd get her being upset about the fall of troy but not why she's upset with him #but as gods do he'd imagine she should be happy about getting rescued by him #why am i doing this to myself (and cassandra) #i suppose... i just want a better ending for cassandra (back to the fic idea) which this would be even though she'd have to deal with apollo #side note imagine the “pairing” in disney's hercules it would be hilarious #cassandra confronting hercules about his creepy older cousin trying to hit on her #or icarus trying to ask apollo if she'll go out with him and apollo replying “if you have my luck she'll just throw a shoe at your face” #she should take out a restraining order also

[7-oh-ta1]

I've been having an existential crisis for the past month and the worst part is that it's the kind of thing that like, you can't sit down and talk to somebody about without feeling awkward. Vaguely, it's a thing where like, the answer you'll usually get is that "it's different for everyone" but I want to understand the other side, too and that answer is so useless. Like whats your reasoning? Explain in 4-5 sentence paragraphs, please. Not in a condescending "I'm right, so why do you think THAT?" way either I mean in like in a, if I hear it maybe I'll understand too! It's a topic with layers and I need someone on the opposite side to sit down with me and peel all of them back. It feels like... there's certain truths to all humans, except I'm human and I don't know them. I feel like I'm operating on an entirely different system and I want to understand the human way and the things that everyone else but me knows and understands on a basic level. To add to that because these truths are universal absolutely no one will sit down and discuss them; they just assume everyone knows and is operating on the same page to not talk about it. So now I, the one wanting to understand, don't even want to talk about it because I know the other person either won't take me seriously or will clam up! Not even worth it.

So anyway I'm trying to focus on old hobbies to take my mind off of it!!!!

#lindsay speaks #maybe. i don't knoww that's the issue #i feel like every little grain that i gain in understanding takes me two steps back #i don't understand humans at all 😭 #and my brain is just stuck like ''i don't understand yet :('' and won't drop it #i think it's because I'll never understand the human separation between mind & heart. like when ppl say their mind is saying one thing and #their heart is saying another I don't get that. first of all it's both your brain. your brain is responsible for your emotions. yes the sam #place your logical decisions come from. they come from the same place. so to say it's saying different things... the same thing (mind) #is presenting information and deciding what to do with it. that make sense? it's all your mind. to act like emotions don't come from your #mind is dumb. and even further on that emotions are not illogical. they actually make perfect logical sense. chemicals and hormones and #information recieved about what's happening around you it's all put together to affect your emotional state. it's not fuckin wizardry. #so why the hell does everybody act like it is? and why should i accept that when it's not true? emotions ARE logical. #if i see a dead bird on the ground i feel sad. why? because that's a sad thing. it makes sense to feel sad about it. #is that not???? a logical sequence????????? #i grrrr #can't even look to dostoevsky on this one because he was a sexist christian

[pandapillow]

I got nostalgic and wanted to procrastinate so I decided to look at the yandere simulator male rivals and man why are they so cute?

I was actually looking at some redesigns that this one cool person did, I forgot to grab their name on my way out of the website, but they did such a good job! They even gave em better names than just adding an o at the end.

And man I hate how this is gonna be all I'll be thinking of for the next few weeks.

#flip you Yanderedev! #I don't support that dude one bit #and I will separate the art from the creator as much as I want because my headcanons are saving me and them #man... the delinquent redesign was so cool #and the student council president redesign was super pretty too #I forgot what the og design looked like and man the cool redesign art person has gods hands #or maybe Buddha #I'll stick with Apollo #I'm so mad that they were so pretty #My heart can't take this #I'm too delusional already! #Oh that reminds me I still have a fanfic to finish... oh well I'll get to it eventually #just my thoughts

[strawbebyjam]

(,:

#realizing 11:30 is heartbreak o'clock for my brain i think #like particularly with like. the burning itch to text them again #i know full well it's fruitless but my body wants me to go back and water the plants anyways. yk? like. i know it doesn't save a dead tree #if i go back every five minutes and throw a bucket of fertilizer at it #it's over. it's gone. n i can't change that. n i gotta make peace with that in a way that doesn't leave me staring at 'new message' weekly #i know it'll take me time. i don't wanna rush myself. but also like. man JKLDHFGDH like #i wish what i really wanted was for like #some patient beautiful angel to swoop in and nurse my heart back to full health so i don't have to do it myself #but i know that's not what i want anymore yk? like #i want to nurse my heart to a place better than it was at before it loved at all. like #i wanna be able to long for love without the desperation attached. i want love to be optional to my heart and not water or oxygen yk? like #desperation makes me feel crappy #maybe that's the more honest way to put it #mano.mindtalk #neg

[zanathan-aisling]

sooo chainsaw man chapter huh

#chainsaw man spoilers #read it soon as it came out just haven't said anything bc like. #while good! and dramatic and shit! it doesn't leave room to talk really! #my only real 'thought' is that makima might not be able to 'control' people who genuinely love her???? because i'm still flying by the #'barem wasn't being controlled' boat #doesn't necessarily contradict the free will theory or take away from his character too too much #out of ALLL the weapon humans he still stuck out as the least... reverent. i don't mind that he LIKES makima because that #him being like. chainsaw fan number 2 to her. but like also being makima fan number 2 to denji. theres something there sdglkdhhklgsd. #that said it does take away a BIT of his edge for him to still believe makima's 'peace' crap. unless thats just him lying again. #ANWYAYS #back to the 'makima can't control blablabla' thing: #but that makes it wierd that it transfers onto other control devils' ability to control people #maybe its like. both. #like that its both because 'barem's heart belongs to her' and also that barem wasn't under literal control #or. something #also like damn is kishibe just DEAD already? he felt competent at least to run a better operation than public safety currently has. #did fami just fucking kill him. is he out of the buisiness for some fucking reason??? #OH ALSO barem being less makima-centric despite still bearing allegience to her could also be due to how flamethrowers are kinda intertwine #conceptually with 'fire' and fire is a really fucking big name #similar armor to pochita. like if a darkthrower existed it would also -while not COMPLETELY deny access like Chainy. would neuter makima's #degree of influence #fallingthrower.....

[born-to-lose]

Missing people and regretting shit o'clock

#why did i even let it come this far. 7 fucking months and i didn't realize what was going wrong so i could have saved it #i want him back fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck #was thinking of this notebook i filled for him with memories and poetry and quotes and general mushy things and goddamn #why am i crying i just looked at my desk and i don't have the heart to put everything in a box so i don't see it every day when i wake up #i know i can't change it and it's probably over for good now after i fucked some things up extra hard but fuck do i miss him #i wish i could have done something in time before even the thought of breaking up came up #just when i thought for once things are working out for me and it was really fucking good and happy until a week before it ended #guess i just can't be happy. i never could #i was really really willing to talk things out and fix whatever needs to be fixed while staying together #not go separate ways and maybe not so maybe definitely not possibly maybe see if we can try again in the future #which we (spoiler) apparently won't and i kinda came to terms with that but i still wish there was a possibility #or at least i would have liked to know from the beginning and not spend weeks hoping for a reunion and working towards that specifically #while i seem to be the only one with that goal #idk i just wish it had been more thought through and talked about properly so there wouldn't be the misunderstandings we deal with now #and like boundaries for the first two months or so after that but it takes two i guess #disclaimer i'm not bitter or mad at anyone just sad and nostalgic. if the person in question reads this i love you ok that won't change #deleting later but now i need to go back to sleep before i kill myself on a whim #mel talks #depressed bitch posting #i know i know i know i did some shit too that wasn't great and i'm not saying i'm innocent here i'm just so depressed about the situation #it's been seven goddamn weeks it never took me this long to get over anything before