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girasollake · 1 year

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everything i wanted

ꨄpairing: neteyam x fem!omaticaya!reader / jake sully x reader(platonic)

ꨄrequested: no

ꨄtype: mostly angst, some fluff

ꨄsummary: you always wanted to feel appreciated, neteyam always wanted to be the best warrior; in short: u seek validation in older men cause you dont have family and because you are the best warrior, neteyam is jealous of you, the whole fic roughly follows the plot of atwow!!! ummmm kinda enemies to lovers?????

ꨄwarnings: SPOILERS AHEAD, DONT READ IF U HAVENT SEEN ATWOW, mentions of being shot, angst, my bad writing cause i havent written anything since september, reader is a year older than neteyam

ꨄa/n: i feel like this is so bad i am sorry

ꨄword count: 3,402

‘How could you both be so stupid?’ You threw your hands in the air and shot a glare at Neteyam. ‘You could’ve died! Does that mean nothing to you? Your father explicitly told you to observe, not engage! You are like a child Neteyam, both you and Lo’ak!’

‘I wanted to stop him, he’s just too disobedient.’ He avoided your eyes.

‘And you had to take the blame again? He’s never going to learn if you keep doing that.’ You shook your head and sighed.

‘Can you stop? I’m the oldest and I need to protect my siblings.’

‘No. No, Neteyam. I am the oldest. I may not be your sibling but I am the oldest and, believe it or not, I wouldn’t forgive myself if anything happened to them.’

Especially you.

‘You can protect them, be a big brother, but don’t take credit for every stupid thing they do!’ You moved closer to him and snapped your fingers in front of his face to get his attention. ‘I know you want to prove your father you can be a warrior, but it doesn’t mean that you have to put your life at risk when Lo’ak does something stupid.’ You huffed. ‘Just be careful next time.’

Neteyam felt jealous of you, of the way his father trusted you enough to put you in risky missions because he knew you would survive, of the way he praised your fighting skills and of the way he put you on a pedestal. You were born during the first war with the sky people and both of your parents had died fighting. The clan surrounded you with love when you were growing up, but you had never had anyone to call a mother or a father. You were just an orphan trying to find a place alongside everyone that you crossed paths with. So, when Neteyam was jealous of you having his father approval and trust, you were jealous of him for having a real family. When you were younger you would hide behind the trees and watch them cuddle underneath the night sky, your little heart breaking and longing for this kind of comfort and love. Even though you were Omatikaya by blood you still sometimes felt like an outsider. You occupied your time with training, flying, shooting arrows and that’s why Jake was impressed, that’s why you were one of his favorite warriors and he knew he could trust you. He even got you your own gun, which Neteyam and Lo’ak were especially jealous of.

Deep down you knew what this was about. Jake cared about you, but not like he cared about his own children. That was the real reason you were sent on those missions, the reason he took you everywhere with him on fights. He just didn’t want to risk his sons life's. You knew that and you still took part in everything because those were the moments when you felt like you belong.

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

‘Can we talk?’ Jake asked from behind you.

‘Of course, sir.’ You nodded your head and stopped sharpening the spears.

He sat down next to you and sighed.

‘We are leaving tomorrow.’ He said firmly. ‘This is not a safe place for my family anymore.’

‘Oh, I see.’ You whispered, a wave of sadness ran through your whole body.

‘I want you to come with us.’ Your ear twitched and you looked up at him with hopeful eyes. ‘And I want you to promise me you will protect my children when I won’t be able to do it myself.’

‘I promise.’ You answered quickly. ‘I’ll do my best, sir.’

He smiled at you and stood up, ‘Tomorrow after the ceremony. Be ready.’ He shot you one last glance and walked away.

The next day you were waiting for the Sully family by the ikrans, your thoughts were interrupted by a loud shriek of Tuk.

‘Are you coming with us (Y/n)?’ She asked after she ran up to you.

‘I am.’ You smiled at her and after giving you a hug she ran back to her mom in order to get on an ikran with her.

While you were checking your bags attached to your own animal, you felt someone intensely staring at the back of your head. You didn’t have to turn around to know it was Neteyam. You never knew why he gave you those weird glances, a part of you wished they weren’t that hateful. At first you tried being friends with him, but after a while his behavior towards you had changed. While you were getting along with his younger siblings, he was always staying away from you, watching your every move. The relationship between you felt like some sort of rivalry, but there was always this warm feeling you couldn’t shake off when you knew he was nearby.

After a long, tiring flight to the Metkayina clan you were exhausted, the thought of laying down was the only one in your head. You made the appropriate gesture towards the Tsahik and the Olo’eyktan when they arrived and you suddenly felt really small under Ronal’s gaze. She started walking around you all, examining your tails and postures.

‘Is this also your child, Jakesully?’ She asked, you could feel her judging eyes on you.

‘No. She’s not my child, but she is the best warrior in our clan and she is important to my family.’

‘Is that true?’ She moved to look into your eyes.

‘Yes, Tsahik Ronal.’ You gave her a long nod and felt the warm feeling spreading in your heart after hearing that you were important to the Sully’s.

She whispered something to herself and went back to her husband who a moment later agreed that all of you could stay with them. You smiled to yourself when you were walking through the village following Tsireya, everything felt so fresh and untouched by war, those people didn’t live in fear unlike your clan. You dropped your belongings on the floor and went over to Neytiri to help her.

‘It’s okay, you can go with others and learn the Metkayina ways, I can handle the unpacking.’ She told you and put her hand on your arm.

‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes, go.’ She smiled sweetly and playfully pushed you towards the exit of your new home.

You ran towards the shore and started looking for your friends. When you finally spotted them you quickly jumped into the water and swam quickly in their direction.

‘Can I join?’ You asked Tsireya when you emerged from the water.

‘Of course!’ She gave you a smile. ‘Follow us everyone.’

After swimming for a while she took all of you to meet the ilu’s and learn how to ride them. You were scared of failure, especially after seeing how fast Lo’ak let go of his ilu. Tsireya helped you get on the animal and told you that you’re gonna be okay, you just have to hold it tight.

‘How could she not be fine? She’s the best warrior after all.’ Neteyam muttered with annoyance.

‘Stop it.’ Kiri smacked his arm.

‘What? She shouldn’t be here, her place is with the clan. I don’t even get why she’s here with us in the first place.’

‘It’s not my fault your dad values my skills more than he does yours.’ You replied harshly and then without a second thought told your ilu in your mind to go forward.

You felt angry at Neteyam, rage was filling your body. You were the best for a reason and you would prove that to him. You tightened your grip on the handle attached to the animal’s body and took the biggest breath in your life before diving into the depths of the ocean. The speed was horrible and you felt your hand slowly relaxing.

No. I won’t give him the satisfaction.

You tightened your fist and held the handle even harder than before. After readjusting your position and squeezing your thighs to feel more steady you felt the oxygen slowly leaving your lungs. You shut your eyes and rode upwards, soon emerging from the water and jumping with your ilu only to dive again. You rode over to your friends and smiled at Tsireya. Everyone was impressed, because this was your first try and it definitely required special skills to get it this perfect. Annoyance was written on Neteyam’s face, he scoffed and started swimming away. You sighed and got off the ilu.

‘Neteyam, wait!’ You screamed and swam towards him.

He didn’t even look back and you reached him after you both got out of the water.

‘Neteyam, what happened?’ You touched his arm and he immediately turned around to face you.

‘You happened.’ He scoffed. ‘I am tired of you taking my place all the time. I try so hard to meet my dad’s standards and it’s never appreciated because of you!’

‘It’s not my fau-‘

‘It is. It is your fault.’ He interrupted your sentence and walked away quickly.

And there it was again. The feeling of loneliness consumed you once again, when the boy you adored walked away feeling only hatred towards you. Sure, you were often picking fights with him, replying to his comments with the same energy, but maybe this time you really did take it too far?

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

You were helping Tsireya with some of the duties one day and Neteyam was far from you, but still in your sight. You were stealing quick glances at him so that your friend wouldn’t see it, when suddenly he quickly swam away and you couldn’t see him anymore. You excused yourself and left Tsireya by herself to go and see what had happened that made him go that fast. The closer you got to the direction he swam towards, the better you heard voices screaming and sounds of fighting. You came over to Kiri, she was softly laughing at the pile of boys in front of her. You had to admit it was funny, but at the same time you were all supposed to be on your best behavior. Because of that, you walked over to them and hissed loudly, their heads turning to face you.

‘Enough.’ You spat and looked over at Lo’ak and Neteyam. ‘Both of you.’

They stood up and walked towards Kiri, you hissed at the Metkayina boys once again and turned around to join the Sully’s.

‘It was going well, you didn’t have to-‘

‘Was it, Lo’ak?’ You stopped and looked at him. ‘You were supposed to be on your best behavior, what were you thinking?’ You turned to the older boy.

He didn’t reply to you, he just took his brother by his arm and walked away.

‘You are both unbelievable.’ Kiri whispered making you turn your head in her direction.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Just tell him you like him already.’ She whined.

‘You know I can’t.’ A sigh escaped your lips. ‘He hates me, Kiri. He sees me as a rival, he despises me.’

‘He doesn’t.’

‘He does.’ You said louder. ‘I don’t want to talk about it anymore, let’s go.’

‘Lo’ak was the one that started that fight, he was just helping him.’

‘I know.’ You replied and looked down, soon arriving at your home.

‘And you? Why weren’t you keeping an eye on them?’ Jake turned to you when you entered the shack.

‘I’m sorry, I was helping Tsireya.’ You avoided his gaze. ‘Next time I won’t let anything happen to them.’

And you were right.

You jumped down from your ikran and landed on the sky people’s ship. Neteyam found his way to his siblings and Tsireya as fast as you, jumping onto the deck from his ilu. You shot your arrows towards some sky people coming towards you.

‘Cut the handcuffs!’ You told him when he reached you.

‘Come on, bro. Hurry up!’ Lo’ak screamed at his brother.

You turned around and saw Tsireya and Tuk jumping into the water, ‘Go! Both of you!’ You yelled at the brothers.

Neteyam started dragging the boy away, ‘They have Spider! We have to help him!’ Lo’ak tugged on his brother’s arm.

You locked your eyes with Neteyam, ‘Shit!’ He hissed. ‘Okay, let’s go.’

‘No, you are not going anywhere.’ You stopped both of them. ‘Go back to your father, right now.’

‘We have to help Spider, please (Y/n).’ Lo’ak looked at you with terrified eyes.

‘UGH!’ You shook your head and hang your bow on your body. ‘Just stay close.’ You told them and ran towards the inside of the ship.

You were quietly moving on the big pipe on the ceiling when some people started walking your way, Spider was surrounded by them in a circle. All three of you jumped down at the people and freed your friend, but then a pure moment of joy was interrupted by gunshots firing your way.

‘Go! Go!’ You screamed and pushed the boys towards a wall that would hide all of you.

Neteyam snatched the gun from Lo’ak and started shooting at the enemies, you pulled out the gun Jake had gifted you and helped him.

‘I’ll tell you when to jump and you jump!’ You shouted and looked over at them, they were rapidly nodding their heads. You gave a few more shots towards the enemies and took a deep breath. ‘Now!’

Lo’ak and Spider jumped quickly into the water, you pushed Neteyam first and jumped as the last person. For a second you felt relief when you heard their happy screams, but it was washed away when you started struggling with keeping your head above the water. Adrenaline started coming down and you felt your lower abdomen on fire.

‘Yes! We did it bro!’ Lo’ak hugged his brother who was laughing softly.

‘Come on! We need to go!’ Neteyam yelled when Tsireya came up from the water riding her ilu.

‘Nete…Neteyam…’ You coughed.

His smile faded and he rapidly swam towards you.

‘I’m shot you skxawng.’

‘Shit! Shit!’ He cursed. ‘Just hold on a second!’ He held you tightly and sat you down on the ilu. ‘It’s okay, just hold on.’ His panicked voice echoed through your ears.

He saw his father standing on a rock and everyone started screaming for him. A worried expression came up on his face when he saw his son holding you tightly.

‘She’s shot, dad, help her!’ They started pulling you up to rest you on the wet rock.

Jake inspected your body only to see a big wound on your lower stomach which was quickly bleeding out.

‘Take her to the village, right now.’ He told Neteyam and helped put you on the animal again.

Neteyam held you in his arms as he tried to ride the animal as quickly as he could without causing more damage to you.

‘Hold on, okay? Don’t you dare die on me!’ He yelled to you.

‘But I am so sleepy, Nete..’ Your voice was weak, but he still heard you.

‘No, don’t sleep, we’re right there, just…Just hold on..’ He finally saw the village and hope filled him up. ‘We’re here, it’s okay. It’s gonna be okay.’ He looked down at you to check if your eyes were still open and he saw you slowly blinking. ‘HELP! I NEED HELP!’ He screamed as loud as he could which caught the attention of some people by the coast, they quickly ran to get the Tsahik who was helping other wounded warriors.

‘Neteyam..’ You coughed.

‘We’re here, hold on for me.’ He looked down at you again.

‘I see…’ Your voice was getting weaker. ‘I see you, Neteyam.’ You whispered and closed your eyes.

‘No. No, no, no. Help! I need the Tsahik!’ He got off the ilu holding your limp body in his arms.

Ronal emerged from behind the people and told him to put you in one of the shacks. The Tsahik pushed him outside and covered the entrance with a curtain made out of big leaves and seaweed. Neteyam finally felt the tears on his face which previously were washed away by the splashing water. He didn’t know what to do, fear, sadness and adrenaline were running through his body. He waited for what felt like hours and when he felt Tuk’s arms around him all of a sudden he felt safe. His whole family was okay and when he came eye to eye with his father, he broke down crying again. Jake hugged his son and caressed his hair with his hand. A sudden rustle made Neteyam break the comforting hug. Everyone turned towards the sound, Ronal was standing in front of the shack, her expression was unreadable. She locked eyes with Neteyam.

‘She’s alive. Barely.’ She stated.

‘Thank you, Great Mother.’ Kiri whispered and hugged her brother from the side.

‘She needs a lot of rest and I am not certain if she will survive the night.’ Ronal said and started walking away. ‘Do not bother her. Now it is all up to Eywa.’

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

Your nostrils were filled with a disgusting smell which made you slowly open your eyes. You saw Ronal putting some type of paste on your wound and you hissed.

‘I guess this means I’m not dead.’ You whispered, your voice hoarse.

‘No, but it was close.’ She replied and wrapped some bandages around your stomach. ‘Rest, my child.’ She whispered and walked out, leaving you alone once again.

After a while the silence was interrupted by Jake, ‘Hi.’ He said as he sat down next to you.

‘I told you I’d keep them safe.’ You weakly smiled at him and he let out a soft laugh.

‘Yeah, I knew you would.’ His smile quickly faded. ‘I.. I wanted to thank you. For protecting them. And I’m sorry for using you so much, on all of those fights… I forget that you are still young, god… You’re only a year older than Neteyam and I’ve never thought something like this would happen to you…’ He paused. ‘You have a whole life in front of you, I’m sorry for trying to take that away and not protecting you.’

‘It’s okay.’ You whispered. ‘I know you only wanted to keep your family safe.’

He nodded and stood up, a tear fell down his cheek. He looked like he wanted to say something more, but nothing came out, he gave you one last smile and walked outside. After a while you closed your eyes because the light started bothering you, but you immediately opened them when you felt someone put their hand in yours. You looked at the way your fingers were intertwined with Neteyam’s and gave him a soft smile.

‘I’m so sorry.’ He whispered.

‘You have nothing to be sorry about.’ You coughed out.

‘I have. I am sorry for getting angry at you, for getting jealous about my father and for..’

‘Hey, it’s okay.’ You whispered and stroked his hand with your thumb. ‘And I’m sorry too, I shouldn’t be taking your place by your dad’s side.’

He nodded and squeezed your hand, ‘It’s okay, I know you just wanted someone to be proud of you. Kiri told me how… How you feel like an outsider all the time, because you don’t have…’

‘Parents?’

‘Yeah.’ He looked down at the floor.

‘After all these years I got used to having no one, but when your dad and other warriors from the clan were so proud of me… I just felt this hapiness that I finally belong somewhere, that’s why I always wanted to be the best…I’m sorry again, Neteyam.’

‘I forgive you.’ He smiled. ‘I can’t believe you were ready to die for me.’ He softly laughed and you reciprocated the smile.

‘I can.’ You whispered. ‘And I forgive you too, for being so mean to me.’ Your smile grew wider. ‘But you were cute when you were angry.’

‘Is that so?’ You gave him a long nod. ‘And now I’m not?’

‘No.’

‘Liar.’

Your giggles filled up the space around you and you didn’t even notice when he got so close to your face. You felt his breath on your skin and he put his other hand on your cheek.

‘I always thought you hated me.’ You whispered into his lips.

‘Do you still think that?’

‘No.’ It left your lips more like a breath rather than a word.

He finally closed the gap between you and it all just felt right. His lips on yours felt so right. You finally felt like you were not alone.

‘I see you, (Y/n).’

likes and reblogs are appreciated<3

taglist: @neteyamsgirl @vviolaswrld

#neteyam x you #neteyam x reader #neteyam #avatar the movie #avatar the way of water #jake sully x reader

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veliana · 2 months

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𝓕𝓲𝓻𝓮𝓯𝓵𝔂'𝓼 𝓖𝓵𝓸𝔀: 𝓐 𝓝𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮 𝓣𝓪𝓵𝓮

Summary:During a walk with Malleus, you see fireflies, which remind you of a beautiful story. Tw : The reader summarizes the plot of Grave of the Fireflies by Ghibli (so,spoilers from the movie) Type : Fluff Number of words: 332

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Y/n was strolling quietly in the gardens of Night Raven College, the night having fallen for quite some time. Suddenly, a familiar voice was heard behind them. It was Malleus, the prince of Briar Valley, inviting them to join him for a nighttime walk.

"Child of man, would you like to come with me?" declared Malleus in a soft voice.

Y/n nodded with a smile, allowing the prince to guide them into the dark corners of the campus. As they walked among the trees, Y/n suddenly noticed fireflies illuminating their path.

Intrigued, Malleus approached and observed the small lights with curiosity. Y/n, noticing his interest, decided to briefly tell him the story of "Grave of the Fireflies"

"Child of man, the fireflies seem to interest you greatly, why is that?" asked Malleus.

Y/n smiled softly. "They remind me of a movie called 'Grave of the Fireflies.' It's the story of two orphaned children during the war. They struggle for survival, and the fireflies accompany them on their journey, offering them a bit of light in the darkness."

Malleus's eyes shone with a new light, filled with understanding and compassion. He listened carefully to every word, absorbing the story with evident fascination. When Y/n finished speaking, he looked at the fireflies thoughtfully, as if seeing through them the echoes of the story that had been told to him.

"Thank you, child of man, for this captivating story," he finally said in a voice filled with emotion. "It seems that even in the darkest moments, there is always a glimmer of hope."

Y/n smiled, grateful to have shared this special moment with the prince of dragons. Then, Malleus turned to Y/n with a gentle smile and said, "Child of man, you are my firefly, illuminating my night with your presence."

They continued their nighttime walk, cradled by the gentle glow of the fireflies, while Y/n felt enveloped by Malleus's warm words.

#twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #malleus draconia x reader #malleus x reader #malleus draconia #twisted wonderland Malleus #malleus x you #malleus twst #diasomnia #malleus fluff #fluff

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hello-vampire-kitty · 5 months

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Servamp chapter 136 spoilers

I only read the chapter once so I haven't understood some parts because I haven't looked up the meaning of some words, that's what I'll do when I get to properly translate the chapter, but in the meantime, I'm just going over a few pages so you can get an idea of what's going on.

Oh my God, this chapter reveled so much!

I haven't talked about this, because I still have a few chapters to work on, but the previous one ended with Lily saying that everything was done in order to make the revived Count become the 9th Servamp with Mikuni as his Eve.

If that's the plan, could it mean that Mikuni will break his contract with Jeje or will it be possible to also keep him too?

Lily reveals to Misono that initially he wanted to put Kuro in Mikuni's path, but that would have been a great risk if Tsubaki went after Kuro, so instead he chose Mahiru.

"As someone from a family of magicians that could be easily monitored and who didn't posses the combat skills of a magician...And most of all, he was the son of a certain man"

Lily tells Misono about Touma being Mahiru's father, who was a hindrance because Touma was close to the realization of the Count's reincarnation. Lily thought that if Tsubaki would target Mahiru, Touma would be dealt with if he tried protecting Mahiru.

Lily didn't think that Touma would try shooting his son, but he was wrong.

"Love is the most difficult to read."

Lily tells Misono about his mother and what we knew about her was a lie. To start off her name was Tatsunami Hokaze which is so weird and perhaps it was a mistake because it happened before that some character's name were misspelled, like it happened with Pisca (it was even brought up by Tanaka on Twitter) and I recall one time where Tsurugi's name was written Rurugi xD

So, I looked up Hokaze (歩風) and it seems to be a boy's name and I have found the readings Ayuka or Honoka for girl names, so maybe one of those is actually her name?

Well, if it won't be mentioned by Tanaka if it was a misspelling, for now she will be called Hokaze.

Moving on, I noticed that in the first panel on the left, if you look closely at the book she's holding, it most likely "Jane Eyre" written on the cover, so we have a literary work that's associated with her.

Alright, so she was one of the orphans Lily brought to the Alicein house, like Dodo and Mitsuki.

Lily described her as ambitious woman and he encouraged her to get into Mikado's good graces. If she became his mistress, she could control him from the shadows.

The letters from his mother that Misono read were censored by Mikuni and crafted a beautiful story. In Japanese it specifically says検閲 which means censorship, so that seems to imply that he didn't fabricate the letters entirely, some things that were written in them might have been left unchanged.

Poor Misono :((

Man, the drama of this family...

So, we get to see Lily's past and I'm assuming (because it doesn't say) that he was selling his body? That's the impression I get from that image with the old guy who's giving him money...

Alright, moving on to Kuro's fight against Tsubaki!

It's awesome how Kuro made the candlestick into a sword! It looks cool!

Tsubaki says that demon Kuro was apparently sensei's "something", that he called things such as friend or brother and the demon was sort of like a familiar.

Kuro wants to hear from Tsubaki why is he obsessed with the Count, but Tsubaki isn't reluctant to tell him.

Kuro uses "Elpsis" to try looking into his memories and it's so cool that he can use Mahiru's ability, like he even changed the sword into a staff like Mahiru's!

Tsubaki had a little sister :(

So, apparently the reason he wanted to revive sensei isn't because he cared about him. He wants the ritual to be fulfilled because he awaits what comes after. Tsubaki made a promise with sensei, the latter telling him that he would make his little sister happy.

What could that mean? If she's dead, could it mean that he will bring her to life? It doesn't mention what happened to her...

Oh boy, so, I feel sorry for Misono because of how much he was deceived and we also find out that Tsubaki wasn't actually looking forward to be reunited with sensei because they had a deep bond or something, he even admits in this chapter that he's probably just a means to sensei's objective to be united with Kuro, because sensei was only interested in him.

So yeah, that's about it. I want to end the post by saying that I thank you for the patience with the scanlations, I still have three more chapters to finish until I start working on this one.

#servamp #omg the stuff that were revealed in this chapter #the lies!#lily and tsubaki backstories!#oh my god!

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girlwtdragontattoo · 5 months

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Halsin x TAV Fanfiction "Until we meet again, my heart"

DISCLAIMER: SPOILERS FOR BALDUR'S GATE 3 ENDING. My TAV is a tiefling, so I wrote it with that in mind. You can substitute whatever race your TAV is, if you'd like :)

If you want me to continue, please let me know! I wrote this, because I am truly a sucker for everything Halsin and I wish for soooo much more in the Romance Ending, although I am really happy with the Canon ending of it. I hope you enjoy!

_________________________________________________________

Halsin cupped TAV’s face with his hands and initiated a long, deep kiss. They leaned into him, wrapping their arms around his broad back as much as they could and enjoying the overwhelming surge of belonging, relief, love and peace. The Absolute was finally defeated and Baldur’s Gate could finally return to its former self. The wind blew gently around them, as the city lay before them, engulfed in golden light.

Slowly, the druid released his lips from theirs and stared into the starry eyes of his lover. TAV smiled and noticed that his took a bit longer to form than usual.

“Is something wrong?” they asked carefully.

“No, my heart. Nothing is wrong.” His hands dropped from their face, but he still stood ever so close to them. “But I feel a greater purpose coming out of the shadows. One that I cannot ignore, as much as I’d like to.” His eyes were confusing. On the one hand, the tiefling felt the radiating love they always emitted. On the other, there was a spark suddenly appearing and they agreed, it was hard to overlook.

“What do you mean?”

Halsin sighed briefly, and gently rubbed TAV’s cheek. “We have defeated the Absolute. And I am overjoyed at our victory. But there are so many displaced citizens, refugees, orphans... animals that need my help. Nature needs to heal and it is my calling to help it do so.” There was a slight pause, as he blinked slowly. “I cannot stay with you here, if I am to fulfill my duty.”

A sting. TAV felt their stomach collapse within itself, heat engulfing their spine and neck. They felt as though their body would erupt. But all they showed on their face was a slight consternation that swiftly turned to understanding. They smiled, as much as they could, mirroring the forced one the druid was displaying: “I see. It pains me so much to see you go, but…”, they took hold of his hand on their cheek, kissed it gently and held in their own, “I understand.”

Halsin sighed once more, this time deeply and TAV couldn’t tell if it was out of relief or sadness. He pulled them into an intense hug, one where his arms shook slightly from the pressure. TAV reciprocated and held onto their bear as if their life depended on it. There was no telling when they would cross paths again, so this moment needed to last. TAV felt the druid’s breath in their ear: “My heart, I adore you. This isn’t goodbye. We will see each other again, I promise. But this is something I have to do.” TAV sunk into the embrace even more: “I will miss you dreadfully, until then.”

The embrace lasted eons to TAV, but even that wasn’t enough time. Halsin released his grip, looked into their eyes again and gave them another, long, passionate and gripping caress. Finally, after smiling gently down at TAV for a while, he stepped away, turned to leave and said with his head still turned towards his lover: “Until we meet again, my heart.”

The druid walked away.

TAV stood at the same spot and watched Halsin walk with purpose, once again. They couldn’t help it. The sting, the heat, the overflowing cataclysm of sorrow overwhelmed them and as much as they tried, they couldn’t stop the tears from streaming. Turning to the lake, having the setting sun warm their face, TAV crumpled down on the landing stage and sat there ever so still, letting the tears run down silently.

Not much time passed and TAV’s three closest friends started to gather around them on the landing. Karlach sat down behind TAV and pulled them into a bear hug, her legs dangling with theirs. Shadowheart joined on TAV’s left side, sitting down gracefully and looking into TAV’s tear-stained face. Lae’Zel finally completed the foursome, plopping down on TAV’s right, staring intently into the setting sun.

Karlach tightened her hug and said: “Don’t be sad, soldier. We’re here for you.”

Shadowheart continued to look at TAV, analyzing the state they were in carefully, and choosing her next words with extreme care: “Love can be a wonderous thing. But terrible at the same time.”

TAV nodded, closing their eyes and letting another tear run down. Shadowheart rested her head on TAV’s shoulder, unsure on how else to comfort.

Lae’Zel didn’t say anything, but placed her hand on TAV’s, continuously looking at the horizon.

Finally, Karlach spoke once more: “You really love him, don’t you?”

Those words intensified the heat even more around TAV’s throat. Barely able to control the water leaking out of every orifice, TAV finally nodded intensely and let out a painstaking "Yes". All three companions edged closer to them, offering only their company as solace.

They sat together on the docks for what felt like ages. Being together, having survived the most intense and horrifying battle any of them ever have and probably will in their lives, was a gift they all appreciated greatly. TAV had convinced Lae’Zel to stay with them, which meant they would need to outwit the githyanki, who will surely come after her at every turn. TAV even convinced Karlach to go back to Avernus, promising fiercely to visit as often as possible, letting Karlach come back into Baldur’s Gate occasionally, and most importantly, letting her live. Shadowheart would accompany TAV and Lae’Zel, seeing the little camp of theirs as a new family and one she truly belonged to. Their company would ease some of the pain TAV felt, but it would never fill the hole that Halsin left. They travelled through Faerun together, making camp or allowing themselves a nice stay in a city once in a while, frequently returning to Baldur’s Gate, to see Astarion, Gale, Jaheira or Wyll, but mostly so that TAV could see if Halsin wrote.

It took some time. Too long. To the point where TAV convinced themselves that the druid had forgotten about them. The companions were walking the streets of Baldur’s Gate, Lae’Zel disguised as a halfling by Shadowheart, when a duck fluttered in front of TAV’s face. Surprised, TAV stared at the flapping poultry in front of them and finally noticed a small, rolled up piece of paper stuck to the bird’s leg. Hastily, TAV untangled the note from the animal’s leg. As its duty had been fulfilled, it plopped down on the ground and greedily pecked at the cobble stone for nuggets of food. They unraveled the note and read quickly:

TAV, my heart,

I hope Collin finds you swiftly in Baldur’s Gate.

TAV looked down at the duck vehemently pecking around their shoes. This is “Collin”, supposedly. They continued to read, with a beeming smile on their face.

There have been so many amazing things, that have happened along my journey. I have found a lovely group of helpers, some former refugees, who have assisted me in building homes, repairing the land and adopting children. Most importantly, through my travels, I got to see Thaniel and Oliver again. The former shadow-cursed lands are truly a sight to see. And I want to show you what you have changed here.

If this note finds you, meet me at the Last Light Inn on the day of the full moon.

I have much to tell you and we have much to catch up on.

I miss your eyes, lover.

Until we meet, my heart.

Yours,

Halsin

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #halsin bg3 #halsin #halsin x tav #halsin x reader #halsin x you #bg3 x reader #bg3 fanfiction #baldur's gate fanfiction #baldur's gate iii #shadowheart #lae'zel #bg3 karlach

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lurkingshan · 3 months

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Fermat's Cuisine is an Intergenerational Trauma Narrative

When @troubled-mind pitched Fermat's Cuisine to me, I knew I'd be watching it soon, and I went in expecting it to be a kind of classic high stakes restaurant drama with a twist, about a math prodigy slash newbie chef learning the ropes from an intense mentor, figuring out how to translate his special skill and function as part of a well-oiled cooperative team, and taking the restaurant world by storm.

And it was that, partly (until it wasn't). But the core narrative in this drama is not really about food or math or a classic success through adversity arc at all. Instead, it's about the intergenerational trauma passed down through a lineage of abusive haute cuisine chefs, the deep psychological damage they do to each other, and the way our protagonist and his mentor ultimately come together to break the cycle. Obviously, because I am me, this revelation was a goddamn delight and a very welcome surprise. I'm going to dig in on how this theme defined the narrative, so spoilers ahead, folks!

There are many dramas that touch on how extremely high stress restaurant environments are as workplaces and how rampant abuse can get in kitchens. It's quite a common theme explored in most stories about professional chefs. But this drama didn't simply nod to these elements or include them as an added tension point, it doubled down on them and built in an additional layer by centering its story on a lineage of chefs (Shibuya->Kai->Gaku) who explicitly took their protégés into their homes as parent figures.

Shibuya found Kai when he was an unhoused and orphaned child and raised him, bringing him home to live with him and providing him with shelter and material support and a chosen career path. And then he proceeded to mentor him in such an emotionally abusive way that it's kind of a miracle Kai still had any humanity left in him by the time he found Gaku and began to repeat the cycle. Shibuya taught Kai that his entire worth as a human being was dependent on his ability to cook, not just well, but at a level that few in the world can ever hope to achieve. He raised him to strive to "surpass God" with his food and to feel worthless if he couldn't continually top himself. And he raised him to think there was only glory in this achievement if he did it alone, without relying on bonds with other people to support him.

This is deeply fucked up stuff, and it predictably fucked Kai up, especially once he developed an illness that impacted his ability to taste, and therefore, his ability to cook. He found Gaku and repeated the patterns he learned in his childhood to try to quickly mold him into the same kind of chef he feared he could no longer be, and then abandoned him alone with all the same impossible expectations he was raised with, turning him quickly from a sweet kid with a genuine love for learning how to master his job into an abusive tyrant in his own right. Gaku was just a kid, however, no matter how talented, and he couldn't sustain these responsibilities Kai put on him, so it all came crashing down rather quickly, pushing Gaku to go in search of his wayward mentor and pulling them back together in their shared failure. And ultimately, they decided that their only option left was to try working together to achieve their dream in defiance of Shibuya's teachings.

Which led to one of the best scenes in the drama and the one that clinched this story for me, when after cooking a meal for him together, Gaku directly confronted Shibuya on Kai's behalf and demanded that he acknowledge Kai in the way he deserves, giving Kai the catharsis he has been desperately needing for years. Did Shibuya suddenly change his perspective and apologize for his wrongs? Of course not. But the drama showed us how wrong he was by bringing Gaku and Kai together, with the support of their colleagues, to defy his teachings and make beautiful food together their way. And Shibuya was forced to relinquish his hold on Kai, finally giving him the approval he was so desperate for and releasing him from his expectations. Kai broke the cycle with Gaku's help, and thus began to heal. And in helping Kai, Gaku saved himself, as well.

Now, can I claim the execution of this arc in the show was perfect? No, I definitely cannot. This drama is extremely watchable, has a great cast, and was built around a fantastic main idea, but it also has some pretty significant flaws in how it all came together. There were serious pacing problems in this story--some character information was withheld for too long, some narrative beats were rushed to the point that they barely landed, and some character turns were simply not well grounded enough to feel believable. I have a whole reef of notes about how to rearrange the story elements to make it all work on a higher level. But the core of this story is solid and the ending rings true, despite some bumps on the journey to get there.

I highly recommend y'all check this drama out for something a little different and very refreshing. And hey, it's not often that Japan puts their content on major western streaming services and gives us all easy access to enjoy their work, so we should encourage the practice.

#fermat no ryouri #fermat's cuisine #jdrama #shan recommends #shan shouts into the void

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imaginesbymonika · 2 years

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The look.

Pairing: Soldier Boy x Reader

Plot: Billy see it again. Under odd circumstances.

Warnings: a few f bombs, mentions of murder, reader being an orphan, but no big spoilers

You had no idea how you became a part of Butcher's inner circle- his little suicidal friends group. To be completely honest, you didn't have a clue how you slipped into this kind of life in the first place.

All you knew was that Butcher could smell when someone was fueled by revenge and hatred towards a Supe. He was like a shark and you just happened to be a drop of blood in the ocean.

So once Homelander murdered your parents, it was sealed fate that your paths would eventually cross. Billy just didn't know why he felt this distinctive way about you- it wasn't comparable to the way he felt about Hughie or Frenchie. When he looked at you it felt like he looked at his daughter. Which was something he tried to suppress for months- even years. He loathed the idea of being that close to someone.

He didn't even care about himself, so why the fuck would he care about another human that wasn't Becca.

Becca. His sweet Becca. He can still remember the way he used to look at her- with so much devotion that it nearly suffocated him. Maybe that's why losing her hurt that much- he wasn't used to breathing any more.

But it was something Billy could recognize everywhere- that look. It was in the way he used to stare at Becca when they first met and now he could see it in the way Soldier Boy looked at you. It made him sick to his stomach.

"Whats your deal with that homelander guy?"

You looked up from your spot on the couch: "What?" He chuckled and you couldn't help but mimic him, even if it sounded a bit awkward. "That Homelander guy, tell me. Why do you want him dead?"

For a moment you stare at him before you put your book down. "Well.", you begin and clear your throat: "Long story short he killed my parents." The bearded man in front of you slowly nods his head: "I see. And the long version?"

"After my parents got sliced in half because Homelander 'missed' his actual target, I got put into a home. From that moment on it was one family after another.", you take a deep breath: "No one wanted to put up with a traumatized child, I guess." A silence falls upon the room.

Soldier Boy takes a deep breath. "Whenever I stayed with a family for more than a month I thought "maybe this is it, maybe I finally found a family"- but I just got abandoned again eventually. Sorry, this sounds super depressing."

The man in front of you chuckles again: "Don't worry, I know a thing or two about what its like to be left behind. Sucks." He leans back on the bed. "Yeah, it does."

At the sound of the keys, your heads turn. "Everything all right in here?", Billy inquires and even if that question is said to the both of you, you know he means only you- and when you nod in his direction you see how his shoulders drop. Even if it's only a bit.

His eyes roam the room and when he glances over at Ben, he can see it. That look. "Yeah.", Ben lets out and licks his lips: "We are just getting to know each other better."

#soldier boy #soldier boy x reader #soldier boy x y/n #the boys #the boys x reader #billy butcher #billy butcher x reader #billy butcher imagine #imagine #the boys imagine

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fizzigigsimmer · 3 months

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Roy Tillman needs to catch a bullet. I think he’s going to, and that Gator is going to be the one to serve it to him. Warnings ahead for spoilers through episode 9.

First let me just get my initial reaction out of the way: SCREAAAAAAAAMS. Y’all when I tell you I had my tv paused at the two minute mark trying to gird my loins to get through what I knew was coming. 😆 I mean I knew it was coming but I didn’t expect them to just throw us in like that. So it seems they were not overstating the parallels between Gator and Oedipus. There was lots of talk this episode about choosing paths and digging ditches when it would be wiser to change course - and for his failure to change course, for his sins, Munch has taken Gator’s eyesight.

He has made Gator useless in the eyes of his father (who although worried about him in some distant fashion when he goes missing) abandons him in the mist after delivering the parting message that ‘if he ever had a point’, it is surely gone now. Gator is blind, orphaned and exiled. On the other end of the spectrum there is Dot, who has been in exile since she was a child, running from wolves. She tried to carve out her own space and build the family she wanted, but the wolves came back. She’s at her wits end, back against the wall - but she’s finding that she is no longer alone. Her husband and child are waiting for her and thanks to Indira, Lorraine has finally looked past her own bias and seen her for who she is. With Witt and a swat team rallying to save her and Munch arriving just in time to save her from the grave she’s been fleeing all these years it is reinforced over and over: Dorthy Lyon has finally been seen. And with that support she is finally able to stop running.

This was such beautiful storytelling and I cannot 🥹 say enough how much I love this show for telling it. I am even fairly confident now that Gator is going to survive the series, and here is why. Firstly, if there was ever a moment for him to pay for his sins through death the moment feels past us. At this point his death would just be superfluous. This narrative is really big on themes and when certain seeds are planted we know they’ll be paid off in some fashion or another.

Thematically Gator has been likened to both Jack Skellington and Oedipus Rex, and as I’ve said before these are both tragic hereos who make selfish, reckless impulsive decisions that bring about destruction. They both however survive their enlightenment and seek to right their wrongs.

Dot has three times now plead with a fellow victim to stand with her against Roy. First Linda in her dream, then Gator in the shed, and finally Karen in her old bedroom. Linda was just a dream and is already dead, so there can be no taking back there. Gator initially refused and told Dot he wasn’t going anywhere - that he was staying on the path he was on. Karen didn’t say it so explicitly but she chose the same. But by leaving Gator alive and opening his eyes to the depth of his father’s disregard, Munch has left Gator with the opportunity to change his course - one last opportunity.

Dot has already planted the seed of doubt in Gator’s mind that Roy never loved him and that he may have taken away the one person who did (Linda). And now that Roy has abandoned him and proven her point, I think that in the end Gator will choose to protect Dot end up being the one who kills Roy.

He has devoted his entire life to measuring up to trying to make Roy proud. But Roy never was. For all the times that Gator has told himself and Roy that he’s a “winner” Roy has only ever rejected the notion that he is. He once asked Gator how he’s supposed to teach him to be a winner if he keeps losing all the time, the implication therein that Roy is waiting on evidence that Gator has the right stuff to win at all.

Gator frequently swears up and down to Roy that he does have the right stuff, reminding him of his skills specifically as a marksman. He once told Roy he could have smoked Munch like in High Noon, but the conversation that really resonates with me is the one they had after the botched Wayne kidnapping.

Because when Roy starts in on him about his “bad luck problem” aka his inability to win, Gator straight up tells him the reasons why he thinks Roy should be proud of him. The point of Gator = All state QB, crack shot, knocking pins down every time. “That’s your boy”.

I’ve lost track of the amount of times Gator has bragged and or threatened to shoot someone between the eyes or whatever, lol, but we know he likes his guns and apparently he’s good with them. When he attempted to murder Munch he did so with a sharp shooters toolbox.

But Roy has never been impressed by Gator’s skills. Every time Gator reminds him of his success in this area Roy dismisses him. First by telling Gator life is not like the movies - which, fair enough - and secondly by outright saying he didn’t care and was ready to take luck out of the equation. Aka, he’s taking Gator out of the equation. Which was a big ouch for Gator’s pride and led him to try and prove his point, killing “Munch” with a single shot.

Dorthy Lyon has finally been seen and is ready to take down Roy, and running parallel to that is Gator who maybe finally sees himself and his father clearly. I’m not sure if it will come down to a gunshot, but I definitely think Gator is going to play a role in how Roy dies. 😆 Time will tell!

**Edit to add that Dot is also the only one to ever see Gator clearly.

#gator tillman #roy tillman #dot lyon #fargo #fargo season 5 #fargo spoilers #spoilers #speculation #reaction #character thoughts

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hualian-fic-recs · 6 months

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Hello!I’m curious,do you happen to know a fic/fics where Hualian wants to do the ‘thing’ but Hua Cheng keeps on thinking that Xie Lian can’t get it up??I mean a fic where he thinks that but obviously Xie Lian is more than capable and in the end they do it :D

Hi there! Fics most like your ask are:

Beast with Two Backs by VampireFaun. E, 36k, heavy spoilers. This one is really lovely and deals with erectile issues and working on it together. The ending is v satisfying

Pleasure, Panic, Pleasure by capyshota. E, 7k, no spoilers. Xie Lian is automatically reacting and Hua Cheng pulls away. Xie Lian is like noooo I want it just ignore my reactions.

Some more post-canon loss of virginity fics:

and i will surround you with a love too deep for words by Fireborn. E, 35k, spoilers. This one is like a warm hug all the way through!

you, my destiny by Naamah_Beherit. E, 12k, spoilers.

Ever After by GirlApart5. E, 8k, spoilers.

perfected by trail by an orphaned account. E, 8k, no spoilers.

why wait by novembersmith. E, 4k, no spoilers, though they do mention the coffin scene

every path leads to you by Nyerus. E, 14k, no spoilers

**Also note that when I say no spoilers in these, I mean that HC comes back after being away like in the novel, so I guess that is inherently a spoiler, but there is no allusion to important plot points or reveals from the novel. So if you wanted to read them even if you haven't finished the novel, they wouldn't give anything major away.

#heaven official's blessing #hualian #tgcf #hua cheng #xie lian #hualianficrec #tian guan ci fu #fanfic asks

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sotwk · 3 months

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random no pressure ask: share a bit of oc lore you've been working on recently/haven't shared before💛

feel free to pass this ask on to others!

Thank you for the Ask and wonderful opportunity to drop more fic spoilers! <3 And thank you for supporting OCs!

Those who follow me closely enough would already know I am focusing on two multi-chapter stories this year, both of them spin-offs from my Canon x Reader Insert fics:

From "Breathe":

From "Taken":

The two love interests in these fics will actually become good friends in "Change the Stars" (which takes place post-RotK), to go hand-in-hand with the brotherly friendship between Boromir and Éomer that I wish to expand on. Although these two ladies are very different, they also find plenty of commonalities and shared experiences to bond over (not just about their men). Their shared qualities include:

Both are orphans (lost both parents very early).

Both come from controversial backgrounds. (details to follow)

Both are viewed as "unsuitable" for the men they love, due to class division and prejudice.

Both are fiercely loyal to their homelands and their people.

Both stand up for themselves and pursue their chosen paths successfully despite being underestimated and looked down on.

Both are very much in love with their men, but are prepared to sacrifice futures with them to do the right thing.

Now, without further ado, just because I can't sit on this any longer... I would like to introduce the names and faces of these new OCs:

Aerdis, Lady of Gondor

SotWK Fancast: Freida Pinto

"What other explanation could there be for him asking for you ? On the evening of a kingdom-wide celebration, when every fair lady in Gondor was clamoring to gain even just a few moments of his attention? Who were you? Just a produce vendor with your own little stall in the lower markets of the White City." - Excerpt from Breathe

Signyr, Shield-maiden of Rohan

SotWK Fancast: Katheryn Winnick

"He had forgotten what a vision she made outside of armor, so long had they lived in battle gear. The gown she wore to the coronation ball had distracted him all evening, but it painted her beauty too foreign. The plain clothes of their people suited her best. On her, the wine-red dress underneath her green Rider’s cloak outstripped any fine silk confection. Her hair, usually held back in tight braids or trapped underneath a war helm, flowed in free waves that tumbled to her waist and made his fingers ache with longing." - Excerpt from Taken

Thank you for coming to my sneak peek, and I hope you continue to be patient with me as I work towards getting these fics going! <3 Your encouragement is SO invaluable and helps SO much.

Tagging a few friends who might be interested (if not, please excuse the frivolous tag XD): @scyllas-revenge @ass-deep-in-demons @konartiste @emmanuellececchi @from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras @hippodameia @heilith @lathalea @unethicallypleistocene @hesperioae @pinkerflamingo78 @hobbitwrangler @hesperioae @alwayssevvy

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morrigan-sims · 3 months

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women of the fifth crusade

I'm still going strong on my P:WotR obsession, so take some sim-ified versions of my PC Reda, Ember (& Soot!!), Seelah, and Arueshalae.

(Reference art for the 3 NPCs plus my ramblings under the cut.)

Ember's turned out by far the best and is nearly perfect, but I don't think any of them are bad per se. I couldn't find a hair that was perfect for Arueshalae, and something about Seelah's face shape / facial features is bugging me, but I can't figure out exactly what it is. Reda's not perfect either but I don't really have a reference pic for her, so this is the best I can do, seeing as I can't really visualize things in my head at all.

I was gonna make Woljif and Queen Galfrey too, if not also Camellia and Sosiel, but I ran out of steam. I'll probably make them eventually, though. I also want to make full edits of them. (Maybe tarot card edits?!?!) I wish I that I could do Lann justice in the sims, but given his appearance that's more or less impossible. Which is sad, since Reda married him in my gameplay.

For people who aren't familiar with the game, here's a quick rundown with minimal spoilers:

Ember: child/teenage witch who nearly got burned at the stake, but still wholeheartedly believes that anyone and everyone can be good, even demons. Tries to convince a Demon Lord that she can redeem herself. Absolute sweetheart, must be protected at all costs, but also can be slightly terrifying.

Seelah: human paladin who started out as an orphan thief. Saw a paladin die saving people and decided to devote her life to the Crusade. Calls herself dumb and good for nothing, carrying immense amounts of guilt and refuses to acknowledge her successes.

Arueshalae: succubus ranger who turned her back on the Abyss, leaving behind an abusive relationship in the process. (Heavily implied former sex worker, also.) Wants to do good. Gets excited about gaining the ability to dream, seeing it as a sign that she's losing her evil for good.

Oh, and Reda is turning into an angel, hence the wings and halo. (Both of which she actually has in-game at this point.)

I can't express my love for this game. In some ways I like it better than bg3. If you've finished bg3 and you're looking for something else to play, give P:WotR a try, I beg you. It's SO GOOD. The graphics aren't as beautiful as bg3, and there's not nearly as much character customization, but the story is amazing, the NPCs are awesome, and the gameplay is very interesting!! The Mythic Path system blows me away and I wish more games had something like it. Also, if you wish bg3 was longer, you're in luck! P:WotR goes all the way to level 20 (technically level 30 if you count the 10 mythic levels), and a completionist playthrough could take you 200 hours. Also, there's I think 7 or 8 basic difficulty settings, plus the ability to customize literally every setting under the sun. If you're a fan of the real-time combat in something like Dragon Age, that's an option too. I am on my knees begging people to play this game, but I'll shut up for now.

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ao3feed-brucewayne · 7 days

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War in the family

by Bottle_opener Batman is always prepared for everything. That is what makes him a core member of the justice league. Doomsday was engineered to adapt to anything in its path to kill kryptonians. Batman and all his plans can’t protect him and his best friend from death. After slaying the beast, Wonder woman is left to pick up the pieces of the justice league. The Batfamily mourns the loss of their father/leader in different ways. Nightwing keeps fighting the good fight, the others follow. Red hood disagrees. Things need to change. He will make things change. That change starts with the clown. Batman is dead, long live the Red Hood. Words: 949, Chapters: 2/?, Language: English Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Characters: Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Damian Wayne, Clark Kent, Barbara Gordon, Cassandra Cain, Stephanie Brown, Diana (Wonder Woman) Additional Tags: Jason Todd is Red Hood, Dick Grayson is Nightwing, Tim Drake is Red Robin, Damian Wayne is Robin, Barbara Gordon is Oracle, Cassandra Cain is Orphan, Stephanie Brown is Spoiler, Violent Jason Todd, Guns, Dead Bruce Wayne, Dead Clark Kent via https://ift.tt/kjJLKqs

#IFTTT #bruce wayne #batman #the dark knight #the caped crusader #gotham #dcu #dc #ao3 #ao3feed

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accidentalmistress · 2 months

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Jakob and Balthasar are OCs of mine featured in To Have a Voice, which is set in my original setting of Vibrahnem. It is the first installment of what I hope will be a series that I'm calling Cursebreaker. So here's a bit more about the boys (under the cut).

(Remember these portraits? I actually posted them a few months ago when I first came up with the character concepts for Jakob [left] and Balthasar [right].)

First, the important stuff 😏 Jakob is allergic to most furred animals and suffers from moderate-to-severe hayfever, depending on time of year. Balthasar can be somewhat sensitive to strong scents and spices, which gets worse if he has a cold. Both are somewhat affected by dust, though it's not a strong trigger for either of them... Unless they are already feeling sensitive, in which case all bets are off, especially in Jakob's case (he's generally a sensitive boi).

Jakob is of average height at 5'9" (176cm) and quite slim (one of those "can't gain weight even if he tries" types), while Balthasar is a much more imposing 6'4" (194cm) and built like a goddamn Olympian. However, he does not like attention or standing out, so he tends to slouch and wears loose clothing, often with a head covering. Basically, Jakob is a friendly, nerdy twink and Balthasar is his shredded, gentle giant boyfriend (who can turn not-so-gentle in a split second if need be).

Physically, they're both in their mid-twenties. Jakob is about 26, and Balthasar appears of similar age, but (spoilers for THaV ahead) Balthasar is actually about a thousand years old, and spent most of that time cursed in the form of an immortal cat. He's originally from a nation called Tulyran, which once existed on another continent that lies across the sea, but that civilization fell hundreds of years prior to the events of the story. He has spent his time wandering the world and eventually ended up in Merseheim, where he fatefully crossed paths with a certain Archivist.

Jakob works in the Archives of the Order, a sort of religious organization that follows a goddess of protection called the Great Sister. The Inquisition is a branch of the Order, and the Knights of the Midnight Falcon in the neighboring country of Schorseau (whose members include Quinns and Ollie from Accidental Mistress) are an offshoot as well. Many people who live at the Order's headquarters in Onteburgh (Merseheim's capital) were raised there as orphans, but Jakob joined voluntarily due to his interest in history and for the chance to study in the Order's extensive Archives.

Balthasar is not very forthcoming about his past, but his physique and prowess would suggest a martial career. With his shy and reserved temperament, one can scarcely imagine him in the role of a ruthless brigand or cutthroat mercenary, but he may have once been a stoic military officer, or perhaps his physical skills were honed within the bloody halls of a gladiatorial arena...

Is there anything else you want to know about the cast of Cursebreaker? Or the world of Vibrahnem in general? I'm only too happy to natter at length about my characters and setting 😂

#snzblr #snz ocs #snz #Jakob the Allergic Archivist #Balthasar of the Broken Curse #Cursebreaker #snzfucker

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lilareviewsbooks · 11 months

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Morally Grey Characters in SFF Books

Here are some book recommendations for speculative fiction (science fiction, fantasy, horror...) with morally grey or morally ambigious characters! This is definitely something I look for and I love having a twisted protagonist I can follow! Makes things a lot more interesting, I think.

The Poppy War, by R.F. Kuang

This is definitely a must-read when looking for morally ambigious characters, and if you've been looking for that then you might've seen this series around. This fantasy trilogy follows Rin, an impoverished orphan living in the Nikara Empire, who aces the Keju, a test meant to select the nation's richest into military colleges. Selected into one of the most prestigious schools, Rin must now face issues of colorism, gender and class, while the possibility of war dangles over the college's head.

Don't be fooled by the synopsis, though. The Poppy War is not a magical-school type of story. This series revolves around Rin's corruption arc - which Ms. Kuang crafts incredibly. The character development and the attention to detail with the world-building in The Poppy War are both impressive, especially considering that the first book in the trilogy was Ms. Kuang's debut. Rin's decisions will leave you screaming, crying and (you guessed it) throwing up, as she gradually destroys everything around her.

She Who Became The Sun, by Shelley Parker-Chan

Another debut, She Who Became The Sun is definitely reminiscant of The Poppy War in the sense that it not only features morally grey characters, but is also set in an Imperial China-inspired world. Here, we follow Monk Zhu, who assumes her brother's identity, sure that she is destined for greatness, and the people she meets in her quest to achieve this. Simultaneously, we read about Ouyang, an eunuch general who serves – and is lowkey in love with – Esen, the son of a province's Prince and the war they're involved in.

Ouyang and Zhu are prime morally grey material. Zhu is motivated by her desire to achieve greatness, which was profecized for her brother, and, as she assumed his identity, she believes is now her destiny. Ouyang, on the other hand, is a more spoiler-ly case - but trust me when I say his decisions are questionable at best.

This is another case of masterful character development, beautifully crafted by Mx. Parker-Chan. Not to mention their writing is absolutely incredible here, flowerly without being too much, and their inclusion of the themes of gender is so well done.

Oh, yeah, did I mention this is queer as all hell?

The Traitor Baru Cormorant, by Seth Dickinson

Since we're talking about books that are queer as hell, I give you: The Traitor Baru Cormorant! I finished this one the other day, actually, but this trilogy, soon to be a quartet, is definitely a must-read if you're into morally grey protagonists. The Traitor Baru Cormorant is about (say it with me) Baru Cormorant, a native of Tananoke, a small island nation that is conquered by the Empire of the Masks. The Masquerade's homophobic and sexist policies affect Baru's family as one of her fathers is killed for being queer. Baru swears revenge, and she knows exactly how she'll exact it: from the inside.

The Traitor Baru Cormorant follows her path of revenge as she inflitrates the bureaucracy of this Empire. So, as you can probably guess, it's a very politically-driven book, and it's for sure very dense. I would definitely recommend it, though, if you're up for it -- The Traitor Baru Cormorant has probably the best representations of moral greyness I've ever read. Baru's character is so layered and complex. Her every move is questionable, though you know her motives are good, all focused on the liberation of her home, Taranoke, from imperial rule.

A Game of Thrones, by George R. R. Martin

Another dense, political one, but this definitely needs to be on the list. Mr. Martin is a master at creating dense plots with the most complex characters you've ever read - and none of them are good. Every single character (except for maybe Ned Stark??) in this series makes questionable decisions, and as the plot progresses they only get more fucked up. The A Song of Ice and Fire series, also known as Game of Thrones, the title of its first book, follows the political situation of Westeros and its surronding countries, as its noble families fight for power in the aftermath of a rebellion.

Although this is definitely a must if you're into grey morality, Mr. Martin's masterpiece comes as a big commitment. The series currently spans approximately 5,000 pages across five books, and it has been more than a decade in the making. Fans (me included) have been waiting for the mythical Winds of Winter for years, and after that is published, there's still A Dream of Spring, which hasn't even begun to be written. It's important to keep that in mind before diving into this one, but let me be the first one to tell you, it's definitely worth it.

I have a couple of more of these, so if you ever need a book full of morally grey characters, just drop me an ask and I'll get back to you with a couple more :)

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ninapi · 11 months

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┊┊┊✧ ⁺ ⁺╚══ Upper moon two ╝

Premise: A journey trough Douma's life as a human, was he always as bad? The reminiscence of his real past lingers as he dies, not the things he always remembered but the reason itself that made him choose the demonic path.

Word Count: 2395

Warning: Main character death, spoilers.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Death wasn't as bad as some would think. The darkness painting the unknown was as beautiful as the milky way, alluring but cold. Shinobu was willing to go with him to the depths of hell and that was comforting to him. What he didn’t know was that her only motives were to guarantee he would remain trapped there for the rest of eternity, not any sort of fondness or attachment towards him.

He felt content, regardless.

Odd things happen as you reach your final milestone, memories that had been always present and some others that not so much reach our perishing moments, and as his head floated aimlessly in an unknown direction, flashbacks of a life he didn’t remember began tormenting his very soul.

It all started with a whisper, a soft gentle voice calling out for him, even if he couldn’t recognize said voice right away, he could feel an immense amount of nostalgia almost immediately flooding his rather desolated and cold heart, something he wasn’t aware he could even feel.

As hard as he tried to remember who the owner of this voice was, there was just no recollection of it in his memories. His thoughts kept derailing his way and he fell farther behind the pillar. What was that feeling just now? His eyes began to water on their own, not like when he forces tears out to appear sad, but a gut-wrenching amount of sadness could be felt within him. He wanted to hear it again, even if it was just one more time, once more before he turned to dust for real.

Another flashback strikes him, a pretty lake on a sunny day, he could feel the warm rays on his exposed skin alerting this had to be a memory from before he turned in what he is now, beautiful wild flowers at his feet, a girl happily twirling in them, but he couldn’t see her face, it was almost completely blurred like if the memory itself had been purposely disposed, “You know I love you more Douma-sama, don’t be silly!” The sound of cute giggles followed the faint staticky voice, making him smile. “When was this even?” He tells girls many things, but never that he loves them, because, well, simply because he doesn’t, never had. But these memories were real, and he could feel it deep within his soulless essence.

At this point, Shinobu was so far away he couldn’t even see her now, but that was fine, she didn’t matter anymore. He understood just like that in that very moment, that what he felt minutes ago towards her was not love, he just didn’t want to die alone, it was a thought that was somewhat terrifying for him.

His memories took him way back to the time his parents died, he was more relieved than anything that day, thought he wouldn’t have to keep up with the cult charades anymore. Of course, he was wrong, but the memory usually ended there, a door opened in a continuation of said day, he could see one of the girls that had been rescued by the cult reach over to him thinking he was sad from loosing his parents. She was also orphaned at a young age and knew how devastating that could be. So in a selfless act, she wrapped her tiny arms around him, told him to cry it all out, that she would be there for him, that he would never be alone, reminded him that he was loved by many. He didn’t know he needed to hear all that, but it made him feel appreciation towards someone for the first time in his life.

It was a fleeting memory. He remembered not feeling sad, only upset by the mess and stench of death. But now something had been unlocked within his brain and he could also remember what happened after that day. How the girl really never left his side, how the girl became a beautiful woman over the years and showed him what love actually meant.

His parents used him almost like a prop.

He didn’t know what being truly cared for felt, so it was utterly refreshing having someone completely devoted to him who could see through all the lies and deeply care for the real person behind the godly performance he was forced to continue with.

In all truth, remaining as the cult leader was his choice, she had said that thanks to it she was able to find a purpose, find happiness, that it might bring the same to other people. So, he continued with his duties, as a symbol that represented nothing he believed in. Though, it wasn’t as bad. People would always bring him gifts, always tended to all his needs and most importantly, now that his parents were out of the picture, she quickly became the one in charge as both grew up, making sure things were as right as they could be in a fake cult, at least he would now get a share in all of it and the cult was now doing actual charitable work.

He'd never been good with feelings. Always had to pay a close look to others to determine what was the best course of action as far as reactions go. But whenever he was with her it was like a whirlwind lived within his lungs. He would feel sad whenever she wasn’t around, throw tantrums whenever she’d be back at his side, cling to her for dear life afterwards. He would feel jealous each time another man talked to her, even if they were also his followers and knew who she was. Always felt so proud when people would comment about how the cult had become a better place all thanks to her help, whenever people would say how beautiful she was. Always felt so happy waking up by her side every morning, the sun shining on her delicate face. Always felt so loved whenever he was in her arms.

“What was her name? I thought I remembered my past….what’s with all these memories….”

Another flashback hits him hard. Something he didn’t really remember either, but this time he was actually aware he didn’t remember this and always bothered him.

Why did he become a demon?

True, he never really cared much about anything. Life didn’t change much after becoming one, even his cult still remains. So why did he decide this was the only way to go?

He always knew there was nothing beyond death, never believed in hell or heaven. But it also never bothered him, decomposing and becoming one with the soil didn’t sound as bad when your life is as empty as it could be.

His head was killing him, even if that sounded like a joke. He was already dead, having a headache sounded ridiculous. But the memory of Muzan walking towards his very much devastated self caught him off guard.

He is sure he was looking at himself, almost in a different perspective, didn’t quite feel like a memory of his, it felt more like Muzan’s memory.

There were tears covering his own face, blood everywhere. He was pulling at his own hair, sobbing uncontrollably. Even if these were someone else’s memories he could feel his own pain emanating from his body from where he was looking at the scene unfold.

The beautiful woman of his memories was lying on the ground, her head on his lap. She wasn’t moving at all, one of her hands was clutching at her enlarged belly in agony.

“I came here because I heard a rumor of a very popular cult leader that gathered the masses over some useless belief system. Thought you could be of some use for my cause. Seeing you probably don’t have much left, wouldn’t you become a demon and be part of something grater? Become stronger?”

The perspective switched in his head like switching gears, he was now looking into Muzan’s eyes through a wall of tears. He could feel the stickiness of the blood glued to his hands, it was warm, heavy, the smell of it embedded in his brain for good, his body was shacking brutally and he couldn’t feel any sign of life coming out of her body.

“Did you know, demons eat people? If you manage to take in all the blood I give you, you could absorb that woman and the child in her womb. They could be a part of you for eternity.”

The man was right, he had nothing left.

The memory gets cut off, another one violently coming and it was of only a few minutes before Muzan’s arrival. His only love, the mother of his unborn child crumbled nearly dead in his arms after a raid of religious radicals invaded their home grounds. He was the one that was supposed to die, not her, not his baby.

“NOOOOO, (Y/N)!! No, please don’t leave me. Please, my love….don’t leave me….” One of her hands held onto her oversized belly, she could no longer feel the child move within her anymore, the life she held so dear was slipping out of her hands. Her other hand went to caress Douma’s face lovingly. “I’m sorry, love. I’ll be leaving first, we’ll wait for you…let’s meet again.” Her last words were a mix of strangled words and small gasps, ripping his heart out of his chest along the way.

He's never felt so heartbroken before even if it was just a memory.

“(Y/N)…that’s right, that was her name.”

Reminiscing over his own death, he continued floating into nothingness. A dark abyss swallowing him completely and taking him to happier times.

Another memory, of just a few days before the tragedy comes around, “Douma-sama, can we plant some lotus plants in the pond? They’re so pretty, I always envied families that had aquatic gardens.” he once again could feel through his own memories, the weight of her head against his chest, her warmth seeping through his garments. He was gazing at the currently empty looking pond in their property, his hand caressing the large baby bump. “Anything for you, my love. But would they grow here? We have so much snow in the winter, isn’t it too cold for them?”

Funny things happen when your existence is about to disappear completely from this world, suddenly everything made sense.

He’s been living over a hundred years thinking he had no feelings, that he’s never felt anything at all in his entire life, just to realize everything he did was tied to the only woman he ever loved, even his own demonic techniques.

This realization brought tears to his eyes once more. He’s never really been alone all this time.

He would always say that to all his victims, mirror Muzan’s words. They would always be a part of him if he absorbed them, there was no need to be afraid of turning to dust and leave no memory, but in reality, he didn’t really believe that at all, it was just embedded in his mind, like a sales pitch. But she was clearly still a part of him, even when he couldn’t remember for the longest time. She wasn’t lying all those years ago, she never really left his side, always protected him.

It was in this very moment of the dying process that many others would feel remorse and even self-hatred for all the damage they caused to others, he should feel it towards the victims of his selfish lifestyle.

But he didn’t in the slightest, instead he felt grateful to his lordship, as usual he was absolutely right. Absorbing her and his child allowed them to live with him longer that they could ever had. True, he would of preferred to live a long happy life, die of old age holding her hand, see his child grow and become an adult. But he didn’t have the luxury some others have of dreaming that big, their lives were taken in the most gruesome way possible, it was the only way to keep them or what was left of them, safe.

He didn’t regret becoming a demon, he would do it all over again.

It is now in death that he finally understands himself fully. Something as simple as his obsession with eating girls was now explained. He always thought Akaza was weird, he didn’t eat women even if they were the most nutritious beings. His thought process made sense, his first meal was a pregnant woman, his woman, his love. He couldn’t remember any of this, but his body remembered how good and strong it made him feel. He thought it was the nutritional value as he forgot that what had filled his senses as much was the love shared and the promise of being together forever, not the flesh consumed.

Forgetting this lead him to gluttony, he was never as satisfied with a meal ever again, no matter how many women he’d eat.

Everything made sense to him now, he literally had to die to fully get to know his own self, ridiculous.

But now that he got his memories back, he can leave with ease.

One last memory reaches his satisfied soul, her loving smile. He loved it so much; he would do anything to see it again. He remembers the sound of her laughter, the softness of her skin, the little kicks of his unborn baby protruding from her belly. His heart was at peace, he was ready to finally turn to dust.

A whisper echoed in the wind that seemed to wrap around him like a warm embrace ,“Douma-sama? Are you finally here, my love? We’ve been waiting for you for so long.”

She never really lied to him; it shouldn’t be a surprise. She stayed by his side even beyond death, of course she would honor her word and wait for him for as long as it took.

He’s never been this happy about being wrong before. Being able to hear her voice one last time filled his empty heart to the top, even if he wasn't sure if it was real.

“Sorry I’m late. Shall we turn to dust together, my love?”

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Masterlist

#kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #demon slayer fanfic #kimetsu no yaiba fanfic #demon slayer x you #demon slayer x y/n #demon slayer x female reader #douma #douma x y/n #douma x you #douma x reader #angst #pre-demon story #upper moons #muzan being a manipulative ass as usual #12 kizuki

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