#other side of my brain: lmao i fucked your mom last night- AND ILL DO IT AGAIN! jason

[batarangsoundsdumb]

you think jason has ever ended an argument against damian with ‘shuddup I banged your mom’

damian: shuddup you can't tell me what to do! you're not my dad

jason: le- lemme- lemme tell you-

#yes yes yes yes yes yes #but also arguments with bruce #bruce: listen jason you cannot keep doing this- there's a way we solve cases through logic- not violence and- #bruce: what are you doing #jason miming out fucking someone: that's what i- that's what i did- what i did- with your- with your girlfriend lmaooo #jason goes around the cave to high five the mannequins with the old robin suits like a champion #i'm still a big fan of aroace jason tho #i see it like this: one side of my brain -> NO :) jason #other side of my brain: lmao i fucked your mom last night- AND ILL DO IT AGAIN! jason #they can coexist in fanon. nothing is real #jason todd #talia al ghul #(yes jason sort of canonically fucked talia you should ask junkoandthediamonds about it but dont like fuck w/their askbox lmao) #(best defense against weirdos in your askbox is to just go inactive randomly. am i even still on tumblr? youll never know) #junkoandthediamonds is like the best person to go to for comic proof tho like they know everything probably #damian wayne #robin #red hood #dc #dcu #dc comics #ask #bataranswers

[wokestraightpuffy]

Hallo, i hope you are alright and that my ask aren’t annoying but I wanted to ask do you have any c!puffy headcannons? —🤡

YOURE NOT ANNOYING AT ALL !!! NEVER THINK THAT ILU VERY MUCH. MUAH /p

as for c!puffy headcanons, i am not the best person to ever organize their thoughts properly but ill try my best >:’D

ahaha. this got. super complex and way too long and more of like an introspective study to puffy now instead of harmless fun headcanons so, uh. under read more <3 (also reminder this is all /rp and /dsmp)

* i like to think that she has a hero complex, but its a bit different since she never really sees herself as an ‘important’ part of the story, not the main character but a support one, hence ‘im fine with being the side character’ or how she’s said she doesnt care what happens to her and would gladly sacrifice(?) herself if there werent other people she had to protect. girl u need therapy urself <3

* though very open with how she feels and never afraid to say when someone/something is upsetting her, ‘opening up’ is still a whole mountain climb for her, apparently. like, she’d rant about the egg, get mad at the eggpire, let off some steam by committing arson or exploding stuff, she’ll rarely ever talk about how much the stuff that upset her actually HURT her. does that make sense? LIKE, she’ll lash out, she’ll get mad, she’ll take NO SHIT thrown at her face, but to show the kinda vulnerability of dealing with that? to cry about it talk about those feelings with someone? I think she’d rather eat her own foot lol

* adding onto the thing above, she doesnt necessarily actually realize this about herself. less of actively doing it and rather growing... used to the ‘cycle of violence’ in the smp as they call it. and the fact that rarely have people really asked, that no one’s actually available for that, w her losing her closest friends, bad and ant, sam being busy w the warden stuff... and niki. yeah. there’s foolish, but i doubt she’d ever see venting to someone she considers her son appealing

* also. puffy is just sometimes... really bad at conveying sadness. i think she’s a rare crier. id go as far to say that shes even more emotionally constipated than dream, lol (but maybe not while the guy’s in his prison arc) and that she’d be the type of person to tell you its okay to cry but beat herself up over something if she let a tear slip in a heated moment

* speaking of sadness. she’ll only ever actually Be Sad if she’s alone or with someone she doesnt necessarily care the opinions of. yknow how she mourned for tommy and blamed herself? those dialogue bits? yeah, those are only times shed actually be vulnerable

* puffy’s go to response to the egg and how its fucked up her relationship w her friends is pure fury. but, going off of her line about ‘failing bad and ant’ i like to think that she probably hates herself the most about it. THAT IS A STRONG WORD LOL BUT YEAH. she yells and curses and gets mad, but sometimes i wonder if the words she had spat before were more directed to herself

* THIS GIRL HAS SELF-IDENTITY PROBLEMS. CAN WE GET A HELL YEAH FOR THAT CHAT? outside of having no goddamn clue about where she came from, how she got here and who she even is, scrounging up a role for herself in a server with a war on the background and traumatized kids got her resignedly coerced into thinking that she is only a Parent. Only good enough when she’s actually doing something Useful for people. SO. when she finds that ship? of having a crew and having a curse? OF FINDING OUT SHE MIGHT HAVE/ HAVE HAD A MOM THATS WAITING FOR HER?  the sense of control she has on herself is absolutely crushed. shattered, and she’s left to pick up the pieces w no one to talk abt it with <3

* adding onto the above, it’s why the line ‘I’m supposed to be mama puffy. me.’ hurts me so much! so yes! please cry with me :D

* also to add more on the fact that she thinks she’s only worth something when she’s being useful, puffy literally contemplated leaving the server, thinking that it wouldnt matter leaving since no one really needs her anyway, since she’s failed so many people. bad and ant, tommy, dream. shes said how foolish can take care of himself on how tubbo and ranboo have each other, how she and niki have drifted so far away from each that it might as well be a break up.

HOOOOOOOOOO OBOY . anon youve really given me the perfect chance to ramble huh? sorry for the rather incomprehensible brainrot, here’s more lighthearted headcanons about puffy asdhfkd

* she cannot stand still sometimes. she always has to be doing something extra, walking when the prime path is right there? shed rather go through tedious little holes or hop and balance onto fences to get where shes going. she’ll mindlessly fix up the path when there are holes or mismatched wood, and one time went on a long, long LONG journey cleaning up the paths tommy purposely DESTROYED near lmanburg and even added cobblestone sidings which werent there before

* puffys a bit of a sentimental person. writing in her log to clear her thoughts sometimes and cared enough to try and preserve lmanburg with the glass sheet and trying to find possible surviving artifacts of history to respect it, even though she’s never been a part of it. its also why, when doomsday happened and lmanburg got permanently poofed, she began to appreciate the buildings that are still standing and began taking more pics 

* she’s not used to being... what do you call it, um, cared for? she’d deflect compliments sometimes, when shes having a particular bad day, like, she’d laugh nervously and change the subject, sometimes she’d outright deny it, most days she’d jokingly say ‘staphhh it’ and add a very genuine thanks. my point being is, do something for puffy that is mildly nice and she’d keep that moment in her heart forever. 

* also funny story regarding the above. u know how karl is notorious for stealing her materials? and how puffy was contemplating doing something in retaliation for them? karl says hi for once when she joins the server and she goes ‘alright fine youre safe for saying hi’ LOL THIS WAS PROBABLY A BIT META WISE but something about this implying that the bare minimum or LESS is enough to make puffy forgive someone is very sad and funny at the same time for me. girl really said ‘oh you said hi to me? thats nice all the crimes youve ever done towards me is now forgiven. <3’ (this is a bit of an exaggeration on my part, ofc, i just think its funny LMAO) 

* ironically, despite being the ‘captain’, whenever riding a boat with someone, she prefers being on the backseat and letting them drive. ig shes just there for the ride i suppose, her and her uber drivers :3

 * she either has a rather unhealthy obsession with baked potatoes or she just doesnt wanna waste eret’s massive potato farm

* idc what cc!puffy says is c!puffy will always and forever be 5′2″ in my HEART. u are the shortest member, u cannot change this <3

* shes really fond of animals/ neutral mobs. she often baby talks to them and they help boost her mood a lot when shes having a bad day :D

* up to this day, the little secret rooms she’s created around the server have all been yet to be discovered, unless the one under bad’s house has been found. she rarely ever really keeps tabs on them, and more often than not they are just collecting dust. she still visits sometimes and cleans them up ofc

* she still genuinely thinks dream can change. cc!puffy’s line about that, ‘i’m his last hope.’ really makes me think about this a lot. 

* ive seen people talk abt it a bit but the headcanon that puffy acts as the server mom to fill the ‘void’ of her missing her mom makes me cry at night /hj

* she really likes her rainbow onesie! i headcanon that eret gave her that along w the sunglasses, but she started wearing that less when she found her old captains uniform. shes never really said why, though, and nobody ever really bothered to ask

* god bless this woman but sometimes the server members get on her nerves sometimes so she goes out of her way to traverse along far away from the main community to maybe commit a few crimes. let off some steam. these take a few days but she always returns

i probably have a lot more hcs but i cant remember them >_> THIS IS A LOT ANYWAY. HOPE U ENJOYED MY BRAIN VOMIT. IF U READ THIS FAR ILU THANK U

if there are mistakes it is bc i am crying and cannot see my keyboard and also i am sleep deprived /hj

#captain puffy #tea speaks #god this is so long the brainrot is concerning ANYWAY #clownon

[ooops-i-arted]

2019 Art Goals

There’s a snowstorm today so I finally am cooped up enough to sit down and make an art goals post for this year.

Let’s see how I did in 2018:

Okay first of all I am SO MUCH BETTER with fingers and so much more confident with them how awesome is that

Um I varied off and on with posting things on time but I did a little better.

I tried to keep on with drawing and I think I mostly did good.  I had a lag in fall/winter this year but I’m getting back on the wagon.

I still suck at facial diversity.  Idk man I try to draw a new face and somehow it’s always the same face?  I think part of it is because I’m terrible with perspective in general and it’s even more terrible with faces so I can draw them from like, maybe two angles.  I have been trying to tweak a little more with chin shape, jawline, eye shape, noses, etc. but not so much success with that imo.

I did pretty good sticking with reference images but the real breakthrough was when I was sick as a dog last month and was stuck in bed with nothing but my phone for company and finally figured out Pinterest, so now I have a nice little collection of reference images in my pocket.  (Before that they were mostly on my desktop, which obviously doesn’t go with me, and I never sit at my desk to draw anyway.)

So my goals for 2019 are:

Ramble less

JUST KIDDING THIS IS GOING TO BE AN UNNECESSARILY LONG POST

Who knows maybe third year is the charm for figuring out facial diversity.  Let’s keep at it.

Maybe this year will be the year I post things promptly and regularly!!  Lmao as if that will ever happen

I tried soapmaking and love it, so I want to experiment more with different types of crafting that catch my eye.

Keep drawing.  Continuing from last year, more stuff with focus on process than product (most of the time).  I find it keeps my workflow going better.

SWTOR remains my main obsession so that’s the content you’re mostly going to get for now.

(But you have my word that whenever I get a Rebels idea, I always draw it, because I know y’all like it.)

I have been missing doing actual comics though, so I want to try and do a few more of those.  I’ve been working on a couple recently and I’d forgotten what good practice it is to keep your characters realistically moving, maintaining detail continuity, etc.

I found this 30 Day of Domestic Fluff prompt challenge thing and I love fluff and fun so I decided to do it with Avei and Corso, and that’s how I’m starting off the year.  Inktober kept me on track well so I’m hoping this will do the same lol.  I’m currently working on 4 and while I’m not sticking to a strict one a day schedule I am doing them in order and regularly to get me in the drawing groove for the new year.

Sewing!  Continue sewing more because I dropped off on that too.

Still gotta make me my Ravenclaw pajama pants.  Since I’m snowed in I might work on those this weekend if I can tear myself away from video games.

Decide on a costume for Episode IX.  Am I excited for Episode IX?  No, not really.  Am I going to go on opening night in costume?  Um hell yes I am!!!

I’m strongly leaning towards Luke but idk.  But since I went as Han after he fell victim to the sequel trilogy I feel I should do the same with Luke.  That and Luke is the only member of the OT trio I haven’t made a costume of.  Also, I can make a Luke outfit easy.  Right now my main choices are:

Luke’s end of ANH outfit but without the yellow jacket, because 1. it’s snazzy af and 2. I can reuse my Han pants and belt and just make a new shirt.

Luke’s RotJ outfit because it’s my favorite Luke outfit and again I already have the shirt pattern and could probably just buy pants to go with it, so simple enough.

Luke’s original farmboy outfit.  I can use the Jedi tunic my mom made me in middle school (still fits!), wear light pants, make boot wraps, make a new belt or use my Han Solo belt, and make a poncho.  I also really love Luke’s fresh of the farm outfit so it’d be fun and simple to make.

One morning I woke up at 5 AM and wondered what a General Grievous inspired dress would look like.  I have no ideas yet but that is still an option in my mind.

The only other goal I have is sort of art-related, sort of not, but it is very important imo, so please allow me to step onto a soapbox for a moment.

By summer 2018 my anxiety and depression had gotten so bad over the past two years I finally went and spoke to a doctor about it, and got put on medication.  It has made a world of difference.  I have so much more energy and I can think again, clearly, in a way I feel like I haven’t for almost two years.  I feel like myself again.

I’d heard before and you probably have too this idea that medication dampens creativity.  “Oh, but would Van Gogh have created such beautiful paintings if he wasn’t mentally ill/depressed/struggling/[phrase of choice]?”  I’m here to tell you that’s a fucking lie and anyone who spreads it should be ashamed of themselves.  I have produced more art and better art since I got on medication.  My brain is mine again and I am more myself, as an artist and a person, than I’d been in a long time.  So if you’re struggling and worried about losing your creativity, don’t be.  (Do tell your doctor if you’re sensitive to medication, though, the initial side effects can be wacky.)

And with that, onward to 2019!  Here’s hoping it’s a good year.

#2019 #art goals #mental health cw #i don't usually like soapboxing but #i feel this is very important #and maybe if i'd heard it i would've gotten on meds sooner #(or at least gotten help)

[peakblr]

rad asks: 3, 10, 16

ah hey!!!!!! thanks for asking 💕💐 sorry this took so long

3. Are there any parts of radical feminism, or beliefs commonly hold by radical feminists that you strongly disagree with?

im actually having a hard time answering this ahshskshdlska i wrote a really long rambly response but i ended up justifying what i was describing as disagreeing with LOL so like. idk no widely held radfem beliefs are coming to mind, sorry im just as disappointed as you are shdkshdlsjds i hope this doesnt sound sheepish or anything. So i’ll say what i do agree with, which won’t come as a surprise to anyone probably.

i’m anti porn, i think porn should be illegal, should not exist and all of it should be destroyed, pornstars should be given justice and compensated somehow for the govt allowing this shit, and all pornographers should be considered lower than dirt and killed publicly LOL. and i don’t feel bad about that, they don’t feel bad about filming rape and selling it, having the pornstars they abuse lie about how they love it when asked. i feel the same way abt prostitutes and their pimps, that paid consent is not consent and pimps can all drop dead.

i’m all for separatism, no it would not stop men from being men, but it would save women and girls a lot of grief, hurt and scarring.

i think gender isn’t real, is used to oppress women and helps no one, and that id rather it be abolished than exist to validate some people who like gender roles, ackshully.

ive been agnostic for a long time; my mom and my brother are atheists, my dad is a deist. but i will sooner believe that the creator of everything is female, having given birth to the universe than a male. A man’s involvement in creation is his ejaculation. No more, no less. life does not begin in the testicles, or you wouldnt see all this anti abortion stuff, you would see more anti male masturbation stuff–if it weren’t mostly about using women as incubators, lol. that being said i’m pro choice clearly.

i am anti surrogacy, for similar reasons. same sex couples should absolutely be allowed to adopt, but no one has the right to have a baby except the woman who can use her own uterus for her own baby. even with infertile women, there is no justification for paying another women to rent out her uterus.

i currently am not vegan but i admire the ideas behind it, and i see the similarities between how animals and women are treated. i do know however that those who are farming this produce are not necessarily treated well either. disclaimer i know literally jack shit about it so i can’t really speak much for it either way at this moment.

i know there are trans identified, detransitioned or reidentified females who don’t like words like “mutilation” to describe the surgeries they have had to remove their breasts or to alter their privates to mimic penises, and while i don’t insist on mutilation being the word used, i don’t see how it is inaccurate and i find it hard to talk about it in a positive light, less i be endorsing that women get these surgeries to ease their discomfort with their bodies. that being said i don’t want tifs or detransitioned/reidentified women to beat themselves up and constantly regret it. it is not their fault that they were made to be so disconnected from their bodies. they did not want that, and with the trans movement there were not a lot of people telling them that there are other ways besides transitioning to deal with these feelings. i don’t see how this can be hard to believe seeing as we call it the trans cult all the time, which is an accurate name by the way.

i like the alternative spellings of woman and women. womyn, wombyn, wimmin, womxn, a mon, wom or whatever it is. i don’t currently use them myself but i love them and i don’t care how “stupid” you think it is. you know whats stupid??? the words “trans woman,” “trans man,” and “nonbinary.” “Cis woman.” yeah ill take wombyn any day rather than agree that i “identify” as a woman for not subscribing to the transgender religion.

political lesbianism is shitty, i understand some straight women don’t wanna be celibate, but dating lesbians to stick it to the men and not because you love that lesbian is selfish i think. if youre bisexual then you are also not a lesbian but by all means be a febfem or just a bisexual who does not fuck with men.

prostitution will never be empowering. make up, nails, impractical clothes, revealing clothes is not empowering, having men think you are sexy or fuckable is not empowering. you are not “doing it for yourself.” “Poly” relationships are not empowering or woke, making yourself more accessable sexually to men is not empowering in the same way that it empowers men to have sex with multiple women.

idk ive been writing this for a million years but thats some things off the top of my head that i know i Do agree with, i know that wasnt the question but i still wanted to say something lol. i realize now this answered multiple questions from that ask post so im sorry if anyone else thought of asking those things that i answered LOL

10. What’s your relationship with the term “terf”?

ah! i do jokingly call myself that occasionally, you can see it right there on my about page. but in all seriousness it’s horseshit and goes to show how narcissistic the trans movement is. I see people, newly self described radfems who haven’t figured out what the point of it all is, who try to say “there’s a difference between terfs and radfems! You can be radfem and trans inclusive!” or whatever. To which I say, 

these are not two separate groups. Actual radfems are called trans exclusionary because they don’t think men who identify as women can be oppressed by women, and that having been born as a woman is not a privilege, regardless of how that woman identifies. 

radfems aren’t even trans exclusive, really. While there are many detransitioned, reidentified women, there are also many who have transitioned and intend to stay that way, or who are even transitioning currently for their own reasons and comfort, while still confronting their womanhood and how they have been affected or are effected by being a woman in our society as well as how transitioning is dangerous. it’s male exclusive more than anything, and rightfully so. any problems men have are created by other men, and as one user on here put it, feminism should not be “all lives matter.” 

i forgot to say this initially but being “trans inclusive” is interpreted by some to mean “trans endorsing,” that being trans is an innate thing just like homosexuality, that brain sex is real, and that there is nothing wrong with trans identified females getting surgeries they don’t need on perfectly healthy genitals, or getting hormones they otherwise wouldn’t naturally have that have life altering side effects. otherwise i would be called trans exclusive. LOL. so it really does not mean anything, ultimately.

16. How do you feel about the terms TIF/TIM?

i think they’re great. it says exactly what it means. it is much more appropriate than trans man or trans woman, and it makes it easier to talk about them with a little less word salad. the term trans man others tifs from females, and the term trans woman others tims from males. this is problematic. there is nothing differing tifs from females and tims from males outside of the fact that they are trans identified. the only differences they may have are if they have surgically and or hormonally transitioned, but it is not enough difference to make them the opposite sex, nor does it erase male or female socialization, and the benefits or consequences of being a man or a women, respectively. i worded this a lot better when i saved this draft last but tumblr seemingly ate it LOL so thats a drag. but yeah. tif/tim is great. i don’t think it should be offensive, there is nothing insulting or cruel about it. at best it is “invalidating.”

thank you for sending me these!!!! i’m sorry if my answers were unsatisfactory or hard to understand lmao i edited a lot of fluffy blabbering out of my responses believe it or not. i hope you’ve had a great day and that you’re having a lovely night 💌🌻😊

#ask

[vnv-test]

1-99

Dude what the f u c k

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? - Sound Cloud

is your room messy or clean? - MESSY LOL

what color are your eyes? - Golden brown

do you like your name? why? - Yes! Because I picked it and it’s something I’ve grown very comfortable with

what is your relationship status? - Single

describe your personality in 3 words or less - loyal, funny, hard-working

what color hair do you have? - brown

what kind of car do you drive? color? - a gray toyota sienna (I’m basically a soccer mom)

where do you shop? - amazon, maybe hot topic. I dont really shop

how would you describe your style? - clothing? Laid back. I wear basketball shorts, athletic shoes, a t-shirt, and sometimes a hat 

favorite social media account - instgram or tumblr

what size bed do you have? - full

any siblings? - yep, little sister

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? - tbh california, just not my current city. I like it here, it’s pretty liberal and open and the weather is slightly standable in the spring

favorite snapchat filter? - doggo

favorite makeup brand(s) - lmao I don’t wear makeup

how many times a week do you shower? - not enough

favorite tv show? - orange is the new black

shoe size? - LOL 3 IN KIDS

how tall are you? - 5′1″ FINALLY

sandals or sneakers? - sneakers all the way

do you go to the gym? - no, we have a workout room at home plus im in band so that works well enough

describe your dream date - oh boy. Honestly just doing something chill together and going for a walk and looking up at the stars together. Nice cuddling and some kisses thrown in there too lmao

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? - $0, I don’t use cash

what color socks are you wearing? - white

how many pillows do you sleep with? - 1, sometimes 2

do you have a job? what do you do? - I do not, menchies rejected me

how many friends do you have? - a big group of like 10 or 11 who I can really call friends and actually depend on

whats the worst thing you have ever done? - oh fuck okay, probably run a red light and almost tboned someone but luckily they stopped because my dumbass is a terrible driver

whats your favorite candle scent? - cinamon

3 favorite boy names - ALEX, Mikey (cuz he’s my bff and I love his name), and Andrew

3 favorite girl names - Taylor, Sarah, Kate

favorite actor? - idk man

favorite actress? - Amy pohler 

who is your celebrity crush? - Laura Prepon god she’s so fucking hot

favorite movie? - Power rangers

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? - not really, but my fav series is chaos walking

money or brains? - brains

do you have a nickname? what is it? - yes! a lot of people call me shimmy or Shim

how many times have you been to the hospital? - I got hurt a lot when I was younger to I went to the urgant care but that’s it

top 10 favorite songs - 1. You’re gonna go far kid 2. First by Cold War Kids 3. Forest by ToP 4. be Still by the killers 5. mr. brightside by the killers 6. The Violence by Rise Against 7. Cecilia and the satelite 8. Handclap 9. Believer by imagine dragons and 10. tear in my heart

do you take any medications daily? - nope

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) - dry

what is your biggest fear? - losing someone i care about

how many kids do you want? - 3

whats your go to hair style? - Parted on the side and just kinda swept over and pushed forward? Idk how to descibe it ill post a pic after this tho

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) - i guess it’s a little on the bigger side

who is your role model? - my friends mikey and lexi (@bridkid)

what was the last compliment you received? - “You’re tone sounded really good that rep”

what was the last text you sent? - “Are you shitting me” to Lexi after seeing that someone was making me answer 99 fuckin questions

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? - bruh idk maybe 9, 10?

what is your dream car? - idk just not my current van

opinion on smoking? - dont do it

do you go to college? - nope I’m a junior in high school

what is your dream job? - high school band director

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? - suburbs

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? - nah

do you have freckles? - not really

do you smile for pictures? - I try

how many pictures do you have on your phone? - 431

have you ever peed in the woods? - definitely

do you still watch cartoons? - of course

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? - wendys

Favorite dipping sauce? - BBQ

what do you wear to bed? - basketball shorts and a t shirt, sometimes I sleep shirtless if it’s too hot tho

have you ever won a spelling bee? - nope, never participated in one

what are your hobbies? - music and hanging out with friends

can you draw? - yeah I’m not terrible at it

do you play an instrument? - Yes! Trumpet, piano, saxophone, french horn, euphonium, bass drum, and pit percussion

what was the last concert you saw? - Does DCI count

tea or coffee? - coffee

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? - starbucks

do you want to get married? - maybe, probably

what is your crush’s first and last initial? - DR

are you going to change your last name when you get married? - probably, just because I don’t like my last name rn

what color looks best on you? - blue

do you miss anyone right now? - my friend lexi cuz bitch graduated

do you sleep with your door open or closed? - closed holy shit

do you believe in ghosts? - not sure

what is your biggest pet peeve? - my trumpet section

last person you called`- Nathan, one of the sophomores in my section because he was super late this morning

favorite ice cream flavor? - cookies n cream

regular oreos or golden oreos? - regular

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? - gay

what shirt are you wearing? - my SCSBOA 2015 Championships shirt

what is your phone background? - a picture of me, Mikey, and our friend Emma laying on top of each other

are you outgoing or shy? - more outgoing than shy

do you like it when people play with your hair? - YES I LOVE IT

do you like your neighbors? - no 

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? - when I shower I wash it

have you ever been high? - nope

have you ever been drunk? - I’ve been buzzed

last thing you ate? - crab quiche 

favorite lyrics right now - literally the entirety of be still by the killers but i like this part “And may your limits be unknownAnd may your efforts be your ownIf you ever feel you can't take it anymoreDon't break characterYou've got a lot of heartIs this real or just a dream?Rise up like the sunLabor till the work is done“

summer or winter? - summer

day or night? - depends

dark, milk, or white chocolate? - milk

favorite month? - august or november

what is your zodiac sign - pisces

HAPPY I ANSWERED 99 QUESTIONS BUDDY also this proves I have nothing better to do with my life lmao

[princeyandanxiety]

The "ask me things" ask - all of them!!! Or if that's too insane, do the first 20 and the last 20 :p

The answers are short bc i was rushing them haha but ill put em under the read more

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

… I would be very, very freaked out. Words would not be said. Only screaming.

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

I saw him last month. No offense, but he cannot write a decent speech.

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

Depending on the drug, it’d vary from “please just make sure you’re safe” to “oh god how do i convince you that this is a bad idea [panicky pharmacist daughter vibrating]”

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

[counts letters on fingers] yes!

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

Sober.

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyep

7. What does your last received text say?

“Ok, see you next week. Thanks. :)”8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

Once.

9. Where was your last kiss at?

Kindergarten classroom. In my primary school.

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

[checks time] uh like an hour ago?

11. What do you drink in the morning?

Water or cinnamon orange tea

12. Where did you sleep last night?

My bed.

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

They’re a lot of work, but they’re ultimately a choice that both people have to make. I’d like to hope that they’re ultimately worth it.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

Mostly test results.

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

“Oh, hey, we haven’t talked in like 6 years. How’s life?”

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

Sunny.

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

Lmao fuck no.

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

Pj pants!

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

Yes. Because I’ll have finished my HSC.

20. Does anyone like you?

Yes ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

No. Only an A, a T, and another A.

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

[shrugs[

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

There are multiple. Be more specific.

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

Yeah but I’m a fucking wuss haha I’d probs pass out from the pain or something.

25. In the past week have you cried?

I cried like 9  hours ago lmao

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

TOY POODLE!

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

Who the fuck dries themself in the shower? It’s all watery in there. Foot mats exist for a reason.

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

nnnnnnnnnnnnnope

29. Do you think you’re old?

Sometimes i feel a little old, but I know that I’m still pretty damn young

30. Do you like text messaging?

Lmao I prefer it to calling that’s for damn sure. I dont actually text all that much tho. Mostly because the people i’d text have free messenger services anyway. That or the bill for texting them would be pretty fuckin pricey.

31. What type of day are you having?

It’s on the better side of neutral.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

Nooooo thanks. I got my ears pieced when I was like 3 and that was enough for me!

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

Mildly cold weather.

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

Yes! He’s been my friend since kindergarten haha

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

relationship because i am a massive romantic (whICH REMINDS ME-)

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

Is anyone actually simple? Like really? There are always so many different parts to one person, so many intricacies and contradictions, good and bad, that they might not even think about.

… so im probably a more complicated person haha.

37. What song are you listening to?

Nice2KnoU by All Time Low i love it sooooo muuuuuuch38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

Most of the time, yeah.

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?Ooooooh yeah. They probably have the most power to wreck me lmao.

40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

Okay in my defense I didn’t realise I actually liked them until my brain was like “lmao what if you had a crush on this person” and I was like “oh. oh fuck. I actually do have a crush on them” but i think it was a few things. they always make me smile, and they don’t mind that i can be a clingy motherfucker. They’re also funny and super sweet, and they have such an amazing mind and personality. Tbh im not entirely surprised that i fell for them because when i click with someone as well as i initially did with them i tend to develop feelings pretty quickly from there.

41. When did you last receive a text message?5:14 pm

42. What is wrong with you right now?Do you have the time to hear the answer to that?

43. How well do you know the last female you texted?Eh. She’s a  teacher.

44. Does anyone disgust you?

Yes.45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?Unfortunately, no, probably not.

46. Are you in a good mood right now?{come back to this}

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?My mum

48. What color shirt are you wearing?

Black. Like my soul.49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?Yes.

50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

Yeah. Myself.51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

… yes because he turned out to be a dick.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?See above.

53. Do you like rain?I frikkin’ love it

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?Not really. I’d only be really worried if it was unhealthy levels of drinking.

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

… Lmao I always tend to admit it eventually, I think. A few times I’ve been like “oh yeah, I used to have a crush on you haha” 56. Do you like to cuddle?

Never… actually… cuddled before...

57. Are you shy?

Eh, it depends. 58. Do you get along with girls?

I tend to get along better with girls than guys tbh but when I was younger I always had a lot of girl cousins and at primary school it was always pretty divided between boys and girls

59. Have you dated the person you texted last?Fuck. no.

60. What do you carry with you at all times?

My phone 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

… maybe. 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?I sure as hell hope I can

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

Ahhh, the beginning of HSC. I was so young then. So hopeful.

Too bad my soul has been squashed. 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

… Bells has just passed out from thinking about this please leave a message after the beep *beeeeep*65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

My friend did really well on an important test and she was super happy about it haha

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

Between 17 and 18.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?    I like doing my own nails but tbh I *really* wanna get them done one day.

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    

How about neither????69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    Nah

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    Who?

71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone?    Android!

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

Fuck if I know lmao73. Do you like diet soda?    

Ew no74. What color are the walls in your room?    

Varying shades of purple

75. Are you 16 or older?    Yep!

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    Nope!

77. Do you have a job?    

Double nope!  78. What are your initials?    

Identification.79. Did you ever have braces?    

Got ‘em right now haha80. Are you from the south?    

I COME FROM A LAND DOWN UNDER so technically yeah

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    “How does a worried Hispanic person count to three?Uno, dos, stress.”

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?    Lol no I don't even know if he's alive

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    

Mum :)84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    

I did gymnastics in kindergarten!

I hated it.85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?    

Probably Moana?86. Do you smoke?   

Nah 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    

THONGS M888. Is your phone touch screen?    

Yes.89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?    

My hair is straight than I am most of the time.90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    Haha no.91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?

Pool   92. Have you ever made out in a car?    Nope

93. …Had sex in a car?    Double nope

94. Are you single or in a relationship?    Single!

95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    Sleeping like a baby

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?  

In person? A few years, now.  

97. Do you like the camera on your phone?   Yes. because i have a samsung galaxy s7 now. My s3 had the picture quality of a potato.

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    Nope.

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    THREE MORE MONTHS. But no not yet

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    Uh theres one person that i’ve been holding a grudge against for fucking ever but other than that no?

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? … look bayer and bayer would be getting sued if i was pregnant.

102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    C’mon

103. Do you have any tan lines right now?

Nah its winter so im all long shirts and knee socks rn   104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? 

Idk maybe

#ask #ask tag #anon #in which bells makes a sneaky admission #its not a massive thing lmao but *finger guns*

[vivaciousyellow]

v: merry christmas LOL, personal ramblings, nanette, barakamon

honestly this is just beyond embarrassing at this point but here we go

dear ying,

what do you say to someone whose brother is dying? what do you say when that person is your mother?

in my case, the short answer is… you say nothing.

that sounds so shitty right? and really i’m not sure if i’m trying to justify it to myself by writing it out in this here post but i guess we’ll see where it takes us -- and at some point i’ll write about nanette, which will be the biggest cop-out book club blog post because the only thing i read for that was the subtitles. might also do a bonus cop-out and write about barakamon vol 15 because apparently the only thing i can bring myself to read is manga and even then that was a struggle. i will add a mark when i change topics LOL this will be long :/

so i wrote the first few lines of this post well over two months ago and i’ve been coming back to try and add to it multiple times since then, but each time i just don’t know what to say. i had updates i could use as milestones - my uncle had surgery but they said they couldn’t guarantee they got rid of all the cancer; the cancer metastasizing, leading also to an interesting intergenerational debate in the family about trying chinese medicine (my parents’ generation was all for it, esp since the american doctors basically said there’s nothing else that can be done, but my uncle’s sons - who are in their mid/late 30s and have been in america since high school - sided with the american doctors and were against trying the herbal pills). early last month my two aunts flew in from the east coast and that really shifted something in my understanding of the situation - things felt more real all of a sudden, like they came to say goodbye. things looked real bad on thanksgiving - we spent half the day outside of the ICU after an urgent call from the doctors.

now it’s christmas eve and we visited him yesterday - the cancer is everywhere, the doctors have given up on treatment, and now it’s kinda just maintaining comfort until the end. given all of that, he’s doing okay. but what i’ve been wanting to process and write about is my mom’s role in all of this and also the capacities of grief and empathy.

i think my mom is an amazing person - she took the news hard and i wasn’t there for it. since then she’s become one of the pillars of support for my uncle’s family and taking on the communication “””burden””” of relaying information to the rest of the family. she’s done so much and appears so strong yet sometimes i just want her to cry, dammit. keeping it together and putting on a brave face is fucking difficult difficult lemony difficult and i’d love for her to not have to bottle it up.

the night of burlesque my sister told me how much our mom cried, and when i asked if i should come home she said no - that mom would feel guilty that i’m away from school and not able to focus on my work. and this goes back to what i said earlier - the way i said nothing. and i’ve shown love and support in other ways: massages, more hugs and affection and asking how uncle’s doing, helping her cook the meals she brings to him, being her brain when things are hectic (making sure we bring things like water and snacks and chargers as we hurriedly pack for the hospital on thanksgiving), but i haven’t been brave enough to simply ask ‘are you okay? how are you feeling today? what else can i do for you?’

and as a psychology major and someone who wants to go into minority mental health, isn’t this what i should be doing? how can i think of being a clinician if i can’t practice what i preach?

but another thing that has been on my mind since thanksgiving is grief and empathy. who is allowed to grieve, at what times, and at what point do others stop empathizing with that sadness and instead become annoyed?

when we were driving to the hospital on thanksgiving, my mom was on the phone with my aunt (the uncle’s wife) who was in tears. she continued to cry as we arrived and would continue to sob heavily for the next hour, then on and off for another couple hours. and that’s understandable, right? your husband seems to be on his deathbed. however, her sobs were quite loud and she hovered and it quickly got crowded in the hospital room with all of the hospital staff, her son and his wife, and more and more relatives coming. the nurses let some of us go to an office and my aunt was led there to be comforted by the nurses, my mom, her daughter in law, and my sister and i.

as the cries continued, some of the things my mom and other aunts said were - don’t cry don’t cry, it makes it harder on him if he hears you crying, it’ll disturb him, etc. though one of my other aunts made the remark (outside of my crying aunt’s earshot) that her sobbing was disruptive and perhaps over the top. and i won’t lie, it really was loud and echoed throughout the hospital halls, so i will shittily admit that i was also kind of self-conscious of the volume. as the hour went on, i felt the agitation of the other family members rise, and it was fueled when my aunt started saying other things (how my uncle has always been so strong and a good person, why did he deserve this, how she’s a worse person why can’t she die instead, how she wishes she would die right now). and that, as you may know, is a huge superstitious no-no.

it’s not the first time she’s expressed suicidal ideations (another huge huge concern) either, and she has apparently also mentioned this in the presence of my uncle. something along the lines of her burden and also how he has been verbally abusive towards her for years. and that’s certainly a beast of an issue already, but for my mom and the relatives, these instances were about not letting my uncle hear because then he will feel like he’s being a burden, etc.

and it’s tough i guess, trying to navigate a space of empathy for someone in rightful distress, of trying to soothe the ill and keep them as at ease as possible, of prioritizing the very limited emotional bandwidth of everyone present. it’s definitely complex and layered and probably no easy or right answer, but it’s been weighing pretty heavily on my mind since then.

ANYWAY i wrote this out not expecting you to have read it all (but thank you regardless of if you did or didn’t) and certainly not expecting you to respond. it was nice to flesh out some of the stuff that’s been happening and to start shaping words out of whatever has been clustering in my mind these past several months. i think i’ve only really told a couple people about my uncle so writing has been helpful. thanks ying for this platform, even if i’m not exactly using it as intended

actually this reminds me - my uncle’s son is named ying. i mean i knew this as soon as i met you, but writing it out in this context feels strange and almost eerie

OKAY MOVING ON TO AN ATTEMPT AT A REVIEW

alright so you suggested i write a review of nanette because i am apparently not capable of reading a book - but really really hoping i can get to it soon. i loved nanette - at the beginning i was kind of like ah okay she’s funny, though i wouldn’t have said she stood out that much, aside from her jokes being more about being gay. but as she went on and got into depth about the process of writing jokes - how to control the room, what is required, what needs to be left out - as well as her own thoughts on staying in the business, i started to see why you and rachel thought it was so good.

hannah talked about how she has been concerned about whether her audience has been laughing with her jokes (and by extension experiences of the lgbt+ community) or at them. and that was a concern i remember dave chapelle saying he struggled with and that was why he left the business for so long. i’m hopeful though because the crowd seemed really supportive of her branching outside of solely comedy within the show - and i think it was beautifully illustrated at the end when (spoiler!!) the overprotective boyfriend of the girl she flirted with realized that hannah was indeed a woman and really did beat her up. her explanation of why the rules of standup require she leave that part out, why she is tired of telling incomplete stories, and why she wants things to change was really amazing and thought provoking. def looking forward to more from her soon!

as for barakamon vol 15 LOL i actually haven’t finished that yet but i did read something so! lmao yo the man is 23 and UMM the anime came out in 2014 aka i was like 19 years old it was freshman year at nu. and now here i am, ALSO 23. back then that felt like ages away like haha handa yeah get ur shit together you’re kinda young sure but ur 23 that’s an adult adult. and now here we are lmao i feel u handa take all the time u need go ahead and raise ur lil island children

and that concludes my three-month overdue post. i really did nothing i was supposed to and i’m so sorry i haven’t been respectful of your time and what we had set to be a fun joint goal. i love you so much thank you for your infinite kindness and patience. merry christmas and i can’t wait to see you this week!! <3 love u babehh

love,

victoria

#victoria #I AM SO SORRY #I AM HUMAN TRASH #i love u

[voleusedoxygene]

yo do the even questions for that thing m8

2. is your room messy or clean? usually messy like me 4. do you like your name? why?ok so my real name is Hailey Hamilton but in french class my name is Gwendoline. I like both, but I think Gwen is more unique, plus there’s like a 1000 Haileys my age so I like to be called that at school. 6. describe your personality in 3 words or lessdramatic, memeric, romantic8. what kind of car do you drive? color?lol I’m turning 17 next month and I still don’t have my permit. help10. how would you describe your style?typical white girl mixed with emo mixed with hipster12. what size bed do you have? a queen sized one. I used to always sleep on the left but now I sleep on the right. I know that sounds unimportant but I feel like I’ve changed a lot since when I slept on the right side. 14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?probably Québec, because I love french but France isn’t as free as Canada is. 16. favorite makeup brand(s)bitch idk do I look like a fukin makeup guru18. favorite tv show?Breaking. Fucking. Bad. how tall are you?like 5'2"20. do you go to the gym? lol22. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?none. thanks for reminding me. 24. how many pillows do you sleep with?one for my head and one for between my knees because they’re bony. the only time I didn’t was when I dated my gf from when I was a sophomore bc her leg would be in between mine and we would fall asleep like that. if that makes sense 26. how many friends do you have? ok let’s see: I have Jason and Mikkel so that’s… a whopping 2 28. whats your favorite candle scent? pink sands from Yankee Candle omfg30. 3 favorite girl namesOcéane, Sylvie, Virginie (this is french & it’s pronounced like “vee-air-jin-ee”)32. favorite actress?I’m a gay girl so of course it’s Kristen Stewart.  34. favorite movie? The Hours is the first that comes to mind but there’s a lot of other dank ones 36. money or brains? brains obvi bc money fucks us all in the ass one way or another 38. how many times have you been to the hospital?twice last year :))))))) yknow, just fun mentally ill things40. do you take any medications daily? yep. depakote, seroquel, and effexor42. what is your biggest fear? being forgotten. forgetting important things. dying without having my story told. 44. whats your go to hair style?idk it’s just kind of there lmao I don’t do anything to it46. who is your role model? Virginia Woolf, Leonard Peacock (even though he’s just a fictional character), and Theodore Finch (who’s also fictional).48. what was the last text you sent?“he tried to hire me and I was like nope nope nope”50. what is your dream car? not like a smart car but one that’s kinda like that?? idk do I look I fukin know cars52. do you go to college? not yet. but I wanna go to study to be a french teacher 54. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? suburbs but only if I had a big back yard 56. do you have freckles?I think I do have tiny ones in the summer or some shit lmao idk58. how many pictures do you have on your phone? not that much. probably like 200 bc I’m constantly terrified of losing space 60. do you still watch cartoons? nah not really62. Favorite dipping sauce? barbecue probs 64. have you ever won a spelling bee? yeah i won a bunch actually in elementary school but then I gave up on life in middle school and it’s gone downhill ever since lmao66. can you draw? I can draw pepe but that’s it 68. what was the last concert you saw? I saw a Philharmonic orchestra in Columbia, SC70. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?Starbucks even though I never go to either tbh72. what is your crush’s first and last initial?j.n but I don’t know if we can be a thing bc she has a super controlling mom who loves Jesus and hates gays soooo. we could pretend to be just friends around her mom but she’s also really busy and says we probably won’t be able to hang until summer so… :/ 74. what color looks best on you? winter colors, I think76. do you sleep with your door open or closed?closed 78. what is your biggest pet peeve?rumors probably. apparently over summer I fucked this guy 3 times and was really sexually agressive with people. fuck you @ p.a.80. favorite ice cream flavor? vanilla. simplicity is great. but I also love it when it has the chocolate and caramel in it. 82. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? rainbow bc G A Y 84. what is your phone background? Kristen Stewart bc I’m gay86. do you like it when people play with your hair?only if I’m in love with them. which has only happened once 88. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?why are you so concerned about my hygiene 90. have you ever been drunk? no but I got high on New Years 92. favorite lyrics right now“vous pouvez détruire,tout ce qu'il vous plairaelle n'aura qu'à ouvrirl'espace de ses bras pour tout reconstruire” which translates to:“ you can destroyanything you’d likeshe will only need to open her arms to rebuild everything” 94. day or night? night!!!!!!!! 96. favorite month?October bc Halloween and it’s the perfect weather 98. who was the last person you cried in front of? well I cried while my recent ex was there but I didn’t want her to see me so I turned around. but she kinda made me face her, so I wouldn’t count that. the last person I truly allowed myself to cry in front of was my ex from my sophomore year 100. ok I skipped one on accident and idk where it went. sorry for skipping one