#other than a shitty back camera from seb

[lewdo]

Formula 1 Grand Prix de Monaco 2021 

#the only clip I’ve found of the seb pierre battle was on c4 broadcast and I can’t screen record that #other than a shitty back camera from seb #so like the race you won’t see that clip in full but instead can see the whole clip of lance flying #is it rude to put lando lapping dan maybe but I wanted the gulf livery featured and there was no other clips #besides there wasn’t too much going on to pick from #I know I missed last race and didn’t do the first race but I think these edits might be some of my fave to do after each race #its fun being able to pick highlights from the race to gif rather than just doing the drivers all the time #formula 1 #f1 #f1 race edit #monaco gp 2021 #my edits #max verstappen #charles leclerc #lando norris #carlos sainz #lance stroll #valtteri bottas #mick schumacher #sebastian vettel #pierre gasly #daniel ricciardo #only tagging drivers who actually did something/are featured more in the gifs

[hyunjilicious]

What about filming with Seb for the avengers? 🥺

This contains mentions of smutty times but I don't think it needs any warnings? Other than shitty writing lmao!!

Ok, ok, hear me out. You had been on the cast for quite a long while, maybe something like ever since The Winter Soldier or Iron-man 2, so you obviously knew your way around and how everything works. Even though everyone was always a bit on edge when it came to the fate of their character, only a few days were left until wrapping up Infinity War, so you were pretty confident everything would be fine.

One day, when you got to set, a little bit later than usual, the first thing you did was say your hellos and head for the makeup trailer. You had Lizzie on your right, her eyes barely managing to stay open as two pairs of delicate hands worked on styling her hair, and on your left, Sebastian was almost done. The atmosphere was eerie to say the least. Everyone was quiet, none of the usual banter or jokes, but you just rolled with it - putting it on account of the long hours. Boy were you off.

About 9 hours later, those worries had no place left in your mind. You were covered in blood, frantically looking from left to right. 

It was the scene right after Thanos snapped his fingers, and you were thankful your character was supposed to be visibly confused, since you didn't have any idea what was going on either. You just remembered the Rossos saying something along the lines of "Yeah, yeah, just like that. You got this, go" but the problem was that you had never actually given them an idea to agree to. You asked them what you were supposed to do, but they just patted you on the back and left.

So when the camera started rolling, your heart was beating out of your chest, your ears ringing as you knew, deep down, that something big was about to happen. 

Your eyes snapped to the right, seeing Chris, or Steve, fully in character, panting his lungs away as he too looked around, lost. 

Just when you were about to turn around, you caught out of the corner of your eye, some form of movement. 

"What the-" you screamed, completely breaking character and not giving a shit about it, as you saw Sebastian fall to his knees. When he tried to steady himself against his palms, his elbows gave in and he crumbled completely to the ground. This wasn't scripted, and adrenaline washed over you.

In a matter of milliseconds, both you and Chris sprinted in his direction, throwing yourselves on your knees and rushing to turn him around. It all happened so fast, it was mostly a blur, but the fear you felt when you saw him collapse, broke you. And in all that haze, it took you a moment too long to realise that as soon as Sebastian uncovered his face, there were tears running down his cheeks as he laughed his soul out.

"Cut!" Joe called, excitedly standing up and waving his hands in the air. "Perfect! We're keeping this!"

"Seriously!?" Chris exclaimed amused, unable to hide his smile as soon as he realised what had happened. 

"You idiot!" you yelled, looking down at Sebastian who had his arms wrapped around himself, holding his abdomen as his face turned red from laughter.

And maybe, had you not been the one who acted like the world just ended in the middle of a set full of people, you would have found this funny from the beginning too. Literally anyone else could have fallen and you wouldn't have freaked like that. And that was why you were mad at Seb, but proceeded to laugh and make jokes about the situation with everybody else from the cast.

About two hours later, when you were both done for the day, Sebastian couldn't find a way to keep his distance from you. He followed you everywhere, his mouth not shutting for even just one second.

"Come on-" he pleaded, jogging a few steps in front of you so he could see your face as he spoke, "You can't be mad at me, please don't be mad at me-"

"I hate you" you simply said, turning around on your heels and sprinting in the opposite direction.

"No, come on, Y/n" he followed you, arms outstretched as he maintained your pace, "It was funny, and it looked great on camera"

Taking a deep breath, you stopped dead in your tracks and looked into his eyes for the first time ever since it happened. "Seb, you know what? I looked like an idiot, it was a dumb idea, I hate you, goodbye"

Frankly, no matter how dramatic you sometimes got, this was too much, even for you. You were perfectly aware you were exaggerating, and had to struggle to keep yourself from bursting into laughter - but you just needed to see how far this could go.

"No, don't say that.." he argued, stepping in front of you again and grabbing your shoulders, "Don't ever think that. You didn't look like an idiot, you were just worried". As he spoke, his voice softened and his eyes warmed up. "You were just worried about me…"

"Of course I was worried about you!" you rolled your eyes, "And you thought it was funny"

And those words right there, hurt him. "No.." Sebastian mumbled, "No- I'm sorry, I- come here"

Without giving you a chance to object, he gathered you to his chest, his arms tightly wrapping around your body. He genuinely felt bad, and now, you did too.

"Seb," you sighed, pulling away, "I'm sorry too- I'm not really mad. I was just messing with you, wanted to see how far this would go"

He seemed confused - genuinely surprised with the turn of events, but he didn't complain. Instead, he just frowned, and searched for your eyes, "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure" you nodded, "I'm not a child, I act like one sometimes but still"

"You really do" Sebastian laughed, as you both mindlessly started to walk towards your trailers. 

"Look who's talking" you mocked.

"If it's any consolation, I didn't know this until like a few hours ago either. I just found out this morning, that's why I've been off. I knew you'd pry the information out of me somehow"

"Yeah!" you giggled, "I definitely would've"

Just when you were about to reach your trailer, you heard Sebastian groan in pain before he abruptly stopped walking. You turned around to see him clutching his right knee, wincing in pain. "Shit!" he cursed under his breath.

"It's too soon" you scoffed, "I'm not gonna fall for that again"

"No-" he waved dismissively, "I'm fine, it's been hurting for some time, don't know what started it now, though"

And despite your brain yelling 'No, no, don't fall for it', that was exactly what you did. Your heart panged when you saw him limp, and you didn't even think twice before rushing to his side to help him walk.

But of course, not even a step was taken before he burst into laughter, causing you to shove him away from you with all your might.

"Can't believe it worked-" Sebastian said in a high pitched tone, laughing as tears threatened to fall down his cheeks.

"I'm never talking to you again. I hate you" you groaned, turning around and storming off.

But he didn't let you get too far. In a matter of seconds he had caught up with you, wrapping his arms around your body from behind, his face right above your shoulder, "No, you really don't hate me"

"Yes, I do!"

"Come on" he chuckled, "Let's go get a beer"

"No, Seb"

"Two beers?"

"Seb-" you threatened, trying to wiggle your way out of his hold, but all he did was follow you around, still holding you in his arms.

"Three beers!?" he asked playfully enraged.

"Let me go, or else-"

"Or else what?" he taunted proudly, leaning over your shoulder to look you in the eye, "What are you gonna do, hm?"

"Don't test me" you threatened, the proximity making you a bit more playful than usual.

"What are you gonna do?" Sebastian grinned, "Spank me?"

And the following words just slipped out of your mouth, your brain having never been involved in any kind of thought process whatsoever. "Only if you spank me first" you said, and then his mouth fell open.

"Deal!" he cheered, letting you go, and moving to stand in front of you, "It's a deal, it's done"

"Yeah" you laughed, "Ok"

"Ok… to the beer and the spanking?" he teased, and you couldn't hide your amusement.

"Just the beer, Seb"

"And what about the spanking?" he pouted.

"Ask me after that beer"

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan imagine #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine

[multimetaverse]

HSMTMTS 2x09 Review

Spring Break was a bit of an odd ep but helped move some key plots forward. Let’s dig in!

Well people can no longer claim that Portwell is one sided. We finally got Gina’s pov and she starts off the ep uncertain whether the shift in their relationship means that EJ likes her but by the end of the ep she seems sure of herself and that EJ likes her back. I liked that she didn’t try to pretend that nothing had changed or that she hadn’t noticed potential signs that EJ might like her; it always sucks when tv characters act like idiots. 

Perhaps the most important reveal of this ep was that Gina has a much older estranged brother who left her and her mom many years ago. That certainly makes her backstory more tragic and is definite set up for her brother to eventually return.

The writers continue to give Portwell great tropes, capping this ep off with an airport rom-com trope that also calls back to EJ getting Gina the place ticket so she could come back in S1. Not only did Gina keep EJ’s Duke sweatshirt but she altered it to fit her better which is both sweet and bold in the assumption that it was hers to keep. Gina got her sign when not only did EJ show up to drive Gina home and take her luggage but he brought her the granola bar that she had wanted but forgot to pack. I wonder if her posting on her story that she was ubering home after her flight was cancelled was intended to see if EJ would show up since the camera focused on her posting it. Also sweet that she’s taken to calling EJ, ‘ Eej’. 

EJ’s opening was good, shows a lot of his character growth from the selfish guy he was in S1 and how he’s learned to value other people which of course leads into his feelings for Gina. We got another great use of the camera as character tonight when Gina was laughing after her facetime call with EJ until she realized that the camera was on her. 

Jack was a lot of fun. Though he didn’t really change Gina’s mind over anything like the ep description said he would.  Seemed like Gina was largely over Ricky and wondering about EJ at the beginning and the end solidified her feelings for EJ but Jack didn’t really play a role in that, it’s not like he encouraged Gina to reach out to EJ or anything. There’s a vague sense in which Jack being nomadic linked him to Ricky’s unreliability in Gina’s eyes with her craving stability but that’s a stretch. Jack mentioned that the second most dangerous part of a plane ride is when the plane takes off, a hint to the blossoming Portwell relationship where in order to take off one or both of them has to risk a confession even though they could be turned down.

This ep might seem a bit weird in hindsight. The zoom parts probably won’t age well and five years from now people might be wondering why they had Gina hang out with a manic pixie dream boy of sorts for an ep.

The path is clear for canon Portwell in the finale with EJ being Gina’s second chance at romance and her first kiss since they clearly telegraphed it out of nowhere. I’ve been impressed with the great work the writers have been doing since 2x05 to build up Portwell as a ship but also work on Gina and EJ as individual characters; they’ve been the highlight of the season so far. 

There was discourse this past week over how well or poorly Portwell has been set up. Objectively very few ships on this show get much in the way of set up or consistent writing. Redlyn and Kowie had barely any set up before getting together. Seblos had none (though in fairness that was due to Disney restrictions) and Miss Jenn and Mike Bowen didn’t have much set up either. Rini did get lots of development in S1 but that’s because they had already dated and were the main ship of the show. The show’s not really about slow burns, if Jenzzara canons in the finale they’ll count and if Rina ever got together they’d also count but neither of those ships have gotten consistent development with Mazzara not being in several eps and Gina and Ricky not even interacting for the past 3 eps. 

Is Portwell a slowburn? In a sense since they did feature quite a bit in each other’s S1 plot lines and even had a fake dating plot but it is true that they were platonic and not that close in S1 so it’s a wash. There was clear set up for romantic Portwell in 1x10 with team wonderstudies and Gina staring at EJ (which interestingly enough looked more like set up for Gina to pine over EJ). I think the main problem is that even though we saw Gina and EJ hanging out in the background we didn’t get any scenes of substance between them until 2x05. It was a mistake and there should have been some scene, like EJ and Gina commiserating in 2x03 over being single on Valentine’s Day or something like that. Hell there was even that still from 2x01 of EJ and Gina looking at each other at the piano while they were in the frame between Ricky and Nini singing and having a moment  which would have been good foreshadowing but that shot wasn’t in the ep.

Whether Tim just really wanted Portwell to be a surprise in 2x05 as a mid-season twist to throw the audience off of what looked like a Rini/Rina triangle or he was unsure as to whether he wanted to go with Portwell or if he just planned it out poorly we may never know. Regardless they’ve had great writing for 4 eps in a row now which puts them slightly ahead of the 3 eps in a row of development Rina got in S1. I’m sure if someone added up their screen time they’d find that Portwell has more screen time this season than Kowie and more screen time than Redlyn or Seblos  got in S1. 

Caswell cousins was fun and Ashlyn did in fact paint EJ’s nails. 

Set up for Seblos drama next week, it’s refreshing to see Seb being jealous over Carlos flirting with other boys that’s definitely not something you see on Disney shows.

Ricky got some healing done with his mom. Enough to cover their issues? No but this is probably the best this show is capable of. There was a brief mention of therapy sandwiched between other options which sounds more like checking off a box then setting up Ricky actually going to therapy. I noticed Lynne was smiling at odd times like when she told Ricky she knew about his breakup with Nini; whether that was poor directing or acting I don’t know. Who knows if we’ll see Lynne again. As an aside still so wild that Tim named Lynne who’s been a kinda shitty mom after his own mom who he seems to be fairly close with.

Really liked You ain’t seen nothin as a song but not a fan of the Tiktok style vid. I’ll level with you wildcats, I’m too old to really get Tiktok, it just seems like a crappy version of Vine to me. Let you go was good, seemed better fitted for Joshua Bassett’s voice than some of his previous songs. A big sign that they’re not circling back to Rini for a long time for sure. Though on that note we got a bit of a hint that Ricky was Nini’s muse which may one day come back as a way to help bring them back together. 

Looking Ahead:

If there’s only 3 weeks left till the Menkies, with only 2 weeks left for rehearsal due to spring break, it’s hard to see East High winning unless North High is disqualified or has to withdraw. 

Lily is in a promo photo so she’s likely the unexpected facetime Ricky gets which is what I had theorized. Also makes it much more likely that she’s the party crasher Ricky re-evaluates in the finale though what Tim actually wants to do with those two I do not know.

There’s little point in bringing back the Valentine’s chocolate since there’s no real stakes. Rini are already broken up, Gina hasn’t spoken to Ricky since 2x06, and it’s not like Nini and Gina were ever close so even if they stopped talking to each other it wouldn’t really affect the show in any way. 

Seems pretty likely that Second Chances refers to Gina realizing that her first try with Ricky failed but her second chance with EJ won’t and that leads to her sharing her truth and cue the Portwell confession and kiss, perhaps with an assist on EJ’s end from Mazzara. We’ve gone well past the point where Portwell can be brushed off as just a plot device to help Rina but Tim is playing with fire by getting the audience so on board with Portwell if he’s once again going to have EJ lose a girl he likes to Ricky in S3.

Gina certainly needs to talk with Ricky and I do think that happens in ep 11 or 12 and leaves them on better terms. As I mentioned last week, if Tim was smart he’d slam the door on Rina if he’s going with canon Portwell or vice versa. If he wants Rina to be a slow burn he’s really botched the writing this season, it’s been too one sided and too angsty to sustain any kind of momentum or audience interest. They haven’t even interacted for 3 eps now and not only has it not affected the show but it’s inarguably made Gina’s story line much better.  Again I don’t think he’s smart enough to not try and do Portwell and then later Rina but he’s accidentally set up the Rina story line to quite easily slam the door permanently on them by having their conversation be closure for Gina who’s moved on and an apology from Ricky who never liked her back as much as Gina liked him.

Not looking forward to seeing Nini basically live out Olivia Rodrigo’s life in future seasons

Curious to see Carlos’ apology song to Seb. Ricky helping him with it is a great way to help start redeeming Ricky’s character in the audiences eye’s. According to Matt there is a bit of a Ricky/EJ rivalry this season and if it’s really happening the sleepover would be a good place to do it though I hope it’s not about Gina. 

Until next week wildcats.

#HSMTMTS #Portwell #Gina Porter #EJ Caswell #Ricky Bowen #Nini Salazar-Roberts #Seblos #seb matthew-smith #HSMTMTS Reviews

[peachy-panic]

Only Temporary: Sebastian Tate

Hello. I was completely blown away by the positive response I got on the first piece of Jaime’s story (title under construction). Thank you to everyone who had a kind word to say about it! You made me really happy I made the mildly frightening choice to post.

In the interest of acclimating to the no-rules, freedom-to-post-out-of-order structure of this community, I wanted to introduce a new piece of the puzzle this time, with a new character that will come into play later.

Also, this piece goes into a little bit of the details, but for frame of reference on the BBU-adjacent thing: this story takes place in a not-so-distant future of the BBU, where WRU has undergone some changes. I look forward to exploring this world building more as I go.

Anyway, I’m rambling again. Thanks for reading. Here it is:

WARNINGS: General BBU warnings, talk of institutionalized slavery, classism, and general terribleness of large corporations. Referenced past homophobia and rough parental relationships, briefly implied/referenced non-con.

When Sebastian reflects on the day he graduated from med school, a sort of emptiness is the memory that first bobs to the surface. Among the cheers and camera flashes in the crowd, white coats and proud smiles, what Sebastian recalls most vividly from that day is looking out into the sea of parents and families and people there to support their loved ones on one of the biggest days of their lives, and not seeing a single person that had come for him.

What should have been one of the happiest moments of his life had been quickly overshadowed by the sinking feeling that none of it mattered as much as it would have if he had someone to share it with. Like there was something so fundamentally wrong with his life, that even something as objectively good and right and decent as becoming a doctor could be dulled over into a feeling of nothingness.

Perhaps, he thinks in hindsight, that moment had been foreshadowing for the following months ahead of him.

Watching rejection after rejection pour in from his top residency programs had felt like nothing short of his own personalized nightmare. He had spent several nights in a row on the phone with Alex, his undergrad roommate and only friend, clamoring back from the edge of many a panic attack, spiraling into all-out existential dread about the future and the past and what all of it meant for him if he couldn’t land an internship, let alone a real job out of school. To his credit, Alex never gave up hope in his friend. Or at least, he did a decent job hiding it if he did. Which was probably exactly what Sebastian needed to get through that particularly dark time in his life, and a good reminder of what a solid friend he had. Even if it was a party of two.

Unfortunately, Sebastian did not have the same faith in himself.

He was able to keep up some facade of optimism as his top five were picked off one by one. Telling himself, despite his devastation, that they were a pretty far reach, anyway. Even with good academic standing, it was famously no walk in the park to land yourself at John Hopkins or Mayo as a first-year. He even maintained a brave face as his first few safety programs reached capacity and moved forward without his name on the roster.

It wasn’t until he received his final rejection letter from some internal medicine place in Bumfuck, Idaho that he felt himself slip into dangerous territory. Sebastian knew himself well enough to know his own depressive patterns by then, and he knew it was only exponential decay from there.

Rock bottom came, as it did, in the wee hours of the night, after a full bottle of wine. Alone in his small apartment, surrounded by half-packed boxes with no destination, Sebastian found himself sprawled out on the floor with his laptop hot against his thighs. He couldn’t have explained why he opted for a privacy browser, but something about it allowed him to justify the words that he typed into the search bar.

It was a new low, and one he had sworn to himself he would never stoop to. Yet there he was.

He gave himself a moment to reconsider, to back out of what was undoubtedly a morally-gray train wreck waiting to happen as his thumb hovered over the enter key. And then the alcohol decided to override his moral compass.

Facility Care is the open secret of the medical profession. It comes with its fair share of stigma, and rightfully so, but it is notoriously easy to break into and pays a decent wage.

There are two types of people who end up stooping to that kind of employment. More often than not, it consists of doctors and nurses who had their licenses revoked or suspended somewhere along the line and needed a way back in. As far as Sebastian understood, they aren’t terribly ridgid about the particulars of each circumstance. After all, in the eyes of the law, the patients they would be treating are a price tag away from being entirely expendable.

The other percentage of Facility Care workers, and the reason Sebastian found himself staring at his too-bright computer screen with a sinking feeling of dread that night, are young medical graduates who find themselves in a tough spot. It isn’t difficult to spell out the logic behind that one when you open the WRU CAREERS tab on the home page and see the bright white words printed across the top of the screen:

LOAN FORGIVENESS.

It is shamelessly predatory and aggressively capitalistic, but Sebastian supposes that particular exploitation is pretty far down on the list of transgressions for an institution of legalized slavery. A few broke and hopeless medical students were hardly going to keep the Powers That Be up at night when they were able to rest easy under the weight of hundreds of thousands of stolen lives.

The whole thing is part of the massive PR overhaul the company did a few years back. In a world that was slowly inching toward civil activism and with the accessibility of platforms like social media to hold them accountable, WRU had to adapt to survive. Adaptation, in this case, took the form of changing the barest of minimums in order to keep themselves above board — to the public eye, anyway. Anyone who dares to take a closer look at the policy changes can see that it’s bullshit.

Changing ownership conditions to a rent-by-contract basis isn’t the humanitarian move they try to paint it as. In the end, it probably just equals out to more money in the company’s pocket when they can get more return on their “investments,” and a larger chance of exploitation for the people being moved around.

Getting rid of the Romantic division is an entirely meaningless gesture when they are still loaning out human beings with no legal rights and the inability to say “no.”

And offering an open job market with good wages and healthcare options to lower class individuals is a pretty convenient way to mute the backlash.

Essentially, you can tie a system of slavery and abuse up in a bow and make it pretty on the outside, but at the end of the day, it’s still fucking slavery.

Not that he has any room to criticize now. Now that he’s one of them.

In the end, Seb tries to justify his decision a few different ways. He is, after all, more or less a young man alone in the world. The odds are stacked against him and have been for a while. With only his own two legs to stand on, the only force stronger than his internal ambition is his instinct for survival, and he’s been running on those fumes for longer than he can count.

He had lasted less than two months under his parents’ roof after he came out of the closet at eighteen. It wasn’t exactly a surprise for anyone involved; Sebastian’s parents had known about (and subsequently bottled) his… urges… since he was in high school. Probably before that, if he is being honest with himself. And Sebastian, for his part, had spent the better part of his teenage years mentally preparing for the inevitable. He can recall long, late nights he had spent crying into his pillow and the perfectly-scripted ‘coming out’ speeches he recited to his mirror when he was one-hundred percent sure his parents were asleep.

Of course, none of the preparation had been anywhere near adequate when he actually found himself wilting beneath the heat of his father’s glare, the weight of his mother’s grief.

But. He had recovered. That is the point he tries to remember when the memories sting fresh beneath his skin, even all these years later. He has more-than proven himself to be a survivor. He has worked harder than anyone he knows for every scholarship, every grant, every dollar to put himself through school. Sacrificed nights out and real relationships for night shifts at shitty diners and long weekends cramming for exams. It hadn’t been easy, but he considers it the price he had to pay for his independence. For freedom, to live the life as the person he is meant to be, despite his unfortunate odds. He spent years telling himself it would be worth it. That one day, his hard work would pay off.

He can’t stop now.

Sebastian doesn’t have the luxury of taking time off to reroute when his navigation has gone amiss. He is walking the precarious line of rapidly accruing interest and student loans and a dwindling savings account, and there is no safety net below him.

Beggars can’t be choosers, and as it turns out, beggars sometimes have to compromise their moral integrity in order to survive.

It’s only temporary.

That is the mantra that gets him through the (half-drunken) application process and the (disturbingly lax) interview process. It is a job. One job. In the medical field, though the details are up for debate, and it is real-life money for rent and food and a savings that will hopefully be sizable enough to get him where he really wanted to be. Which is… really, anywhere else.

He can do ‘temporary.’ And perhaps, some misguided part of him thinks he can do some genuine good from the inside, too. ‘Be the change you want to see’ and all that.

It is a far jump from the floor of his apartment, sloshed and exhausted and desperate, to the cold, sharp reality of walking into his place of employment on his first day of work. Ironically, it feels a lot like an echo of the emptiness from his graduation day.

‘Sterile’ doesn’t quite cover it. ‘Sterile’ is the expectation of any well-respected medical establishment, but the inside of the facility walls has been wiped clean of far more than bacteria and germs. It is completely devoid of humanity. The long corridors that connect the medical wing to the general ward are windowless and dimly lit by flickering fluorescent panels that had make his head pound for the entirety of his first week.

He is given an office, though it is a term he, himself, might use loosely, as it is more akin to what was probably a storage closet before the old prison had been converted into the state’s training headquarters. It leaves him just enough space for a small desk and two chairs. On his first day, he asks if it is okay to bring in some personal items to spruce the place up. The older, balding doctor who had been assigned to show him around merely shrugs, and Sebastian decides to take that as a yes.

The small, pink-framed photo of a six-year-old Sebastian Tate in his grandfather’s white coat and an old-school stethoscope around his neck is hardly enough to make the place cozy from the corner of his desk, but it’s a good enough reminder of why he has to make this work.

‘It’s only temporary.’

‘Be the change you want to see.’

He will do his best.

#Sebastian Tate #bbu #like bbu adjacent? #tw: human trafficking #tw: slavery #implied noncon #whump #Do No Harm: Jaime & Sebastian

[imaginesmai]

Sebastian Stan - We’re a team

Mixing two requests, @squishybebe​ about an interviewer being rude to the reader (I know you said flirtry, but this is what came out, I’m sorry!) and an anon about his son interrupting a meeting. I hope you all like it!

Plot: no interview is boring since having your adorable four year old son, who needs his father as much as he needs him.

To say that Sebastian was bored was an understatement. It had reached a point where he had just resigned himself with looking at the guy in front of him and nodding a little when required.

The questions were too predictable; how did it feel to be playing one of the characters in something as big as the MCU, how was it to work with great actors like Evans or Downey, and how had it been his work out routine that had gotten him fit for the films. The interview wasn’t anymore about his new film, Endings Begging, but more about gossip. Even if he didn’t talk much, the guy was answering himself as he did the question.

“And did you have to cut on any type of specific food, like burgers and other stuff?” he asked and didn’t stop to let him answer. “Because I’ve seen your TV spot about ‘cheat day’ and you seemed pretty eager – you actually ate it after it cut off?”

Sebastian gave him a tight smile, as the guy started talking again about the obesity in the united states. He had caught the camera guy dozing off a few times, and his manager was no where to be seen anymore. From all the interviews he had done, that was without any doubt the most boring.

And the worst thing wasn’t that he was stuck there with his tight jeans, it was that he had brough you and Luca to the plato in hopes of finishing soon and giving you a tour around. Your little boy had just turned four and everything with lights and colours was amazing to him; as long as he didn’t have to stay in the same place for more than a few minutes. He got angsty and started crying, and he already felt bad enough when the clock reached the hour in there.

“Would you say you’re a role model for little kids?” the interviewer attacked again. “With your violent characters and –”

He was cut off by a thud, and everyone’s attention went to the clear glass door, including Sebastian’s, his heart quite literally rocketing out of his chest when he saw who was outside the door. Before he could even react, Luca was jumping up and grabbing the handle, the door effectively swinging open so fast that it could have broken if he wasn’t a little kid.

“Daddy!” Luca screeched, his face red and tear-streaked.  “Daddy!”

You appeared behind him the next second, looking around wildly until you found your kid. He was way too fast for you to catch, and Sebastian watched as his four-year-old kid rounded all the tech equipment and ran into a woman’s legs. She stumbled and glared at him with such fire that Sebastian felt felt anxious, but Luca didn’t seem fazed, as he rushed over his dad with his arms raised.

It was then when he noticed the what the problem was, sympathy forming in his chest as Luca slammed into his legs. You were apologising softly to the people he had ran over as you jogged towards the pair.

“I – I had an accident!” Luca sobbed with such a despair that Sebastian felt his heart ache.

The whole team were all looking at him with their eyebrows raised, the interviewer going as far as scoffing and trying to look around for someone to fix it. You landed on your knees beside them and, even if Luca had ran from where you were playing with him, the little boy reached a hand for you to take.

It had been a month since the last incident, and Luca felt really proud of it. No more wetting the bed at night when he had to sleep alone and no more staining his favourite trousers when you took to long to go home. He reminded you every day that he was already a big boy, and that soon he would be wearing a cool suit like daddy when he goes to the ‘flashy place’.

Luca sobbed even harder when Sebastian rubbed a comforting hand against his back.

“Um, can someone – take care of this?” the interviewer chuckled, looking directly at you. “We were working here, and you’re kind in the middle of something.”

“Yeah, sorry. I’m sorry” you blushed in embarrassment, trying to pry Luca from Sebastian. The boy had an iron grip on his father. “It’s just – he ran out of the room, I’m sorry. I couldn’t hold him.”

“Yeah, well, you should. You can’t let him run off like that, he’s going to become a brat” the interviewer talked, missing how Sebastian was sending him glares with his eyes. “What kind of mother can’t hold his son?”

“Why don’t you keep your opinions to yourself?” Sebastian scoffed. “Come one, we’ll get you cleaned up, yes?”

His voice was softer when he talked with Luca. He placed his hands under Luca’s armpits and hoisted him into his lap, not caring about the expensive sweater he had chosen for the interview. Wiping the tears away from his son’s face, he pressed his lips against your cheek and assured you that it was fine. He watched Luca’s index and middle finger disappear into his mouth. Usually, he would tell him off, but even he felt anxious with so many people looking at them.

The guy got up too when Sebastian neared the door, wide eyes and gripping his notebook. He gestured to the camera to stop recording for a second and ran towards you.

“Why are you leaving? We aren’t over” he said as Sebastian looked back to him. The interviewer took a few steps back when he noticed the angry scowl on the actor’s face. He looked between you and him, hesitant. “She can – she can take care of… him. You know, let the man of the house work. You can’t… leave.”

He attempted to joke with Sebastian, chuckling, but he wasn’t having any of it. Instead of laughing and handing you Luca, he secured his grip on him and gestured you to open the door.

“I can and I will, actually” he answered as he bounced Luca up and down. “What you can do is never talk about my wife like that again, she’s as much as a parent as me, and she doesn’t need to take care of anything so that I can work. If you ever do it again, you can have a chat with my layer next, who will be very happy to hear from you”

Leaving the man open-mouthed, you left the recording room behind Sebastian closing the door behind you. You hadn’t looked up from the ground, only to check periodically on Luca, who was calming down now that he had his daddy with him. Still, there was a small proud smile on your face.

“Daddy?”

“Yes bubba?” Sebastian replied, looking back to check that the door was closed.

“Mad?”

Sebastian smiled softly as he stepped into the hallway, reaching with the hand that wasn’t holding Luca to yours. He gave it a soft squeezed, answering to your unsaid question and Luca’s one at the same time.

“Nah, it was being too boring without you. I’m always up for any of you if you need me”

Luca hid his face on Sebastian’s neck as you made your way to the spare room where you had been playing with Luca. The floor was covered in books, stuffed animals, and a few dolls that he had been playing with, mixing them in some childish fantasy about a castle and a lost prince. You didn’t say anything as you entered the room and let Luca on the floor. Bringing your travel bag, with spare clothes, you cleaned Luca in the small bathroom and changed his clothes between the two of you, putting the stained ones in a plastic bag.

You didn’t say anything as Luca talked the silence away with his ramblings about what his daddy had missed in the hour he had been away. He showed him the drawing he had done and Sebastian told him that he could go and play for a while.

Luca skipped away as you leaned against the sink.

“I’m sorry for letting him run away” you started, quite embarrassed that your four-year-old had crashed Sebastian’s interview. “When I realized what had happened it was too late, and he was already calling out for you.

“No, that’s – I don’t want you to apologize draga mea” Sebastian frowned. “I’m the one who has to apologize, I should have cut the interview sooner”

“You don’t have to cut any interview for us” you smiled at him. “I should have had a better hold on him. Your work is important, Seb, and we can’t go crashing –“

“No, my work isn’t important” he interrupted you, and with a long stride he was in front of you. “You’re important, cause you’re my family. And it’s fine if you interrupt an interview because Luca or you missed me, I can handle a few angry words from the team. But what I can’t handle is you thinking that it’s your duty taking care of everything, alright? We’re a team”

“Quite a team” you chuckled, looking down at the bag with the stained clothes.

“Yeah, but you’re my team, so that’s fine”

You didn’t say anything else and Sebastian leaned in for a kiss, in that small and shitty bathroom. Indeed, you made a good team.

Want to read more? Check out my side blog @imaginesmaimasterlists​, where I keep all the masterlists! Feedback is always appreciated

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[imagining-supernatural]

The First Article

Part 11 of Seventy Percent

Series Summary: When you left on your trip to Vegas, you’d planned on letting loose for one last weekend before heading back to reality and getting your affairs in order so your best friend wouldn’t be left cleaning up your mess when your cancer finally ended your life. What you hadn’t counted on was waking up married to a celebrity who has a knight-in-shining-armor complex, connections with an oncologist, and amazing insurance…

Chapter Summary: You wake up after the big fight with Sebastian

Word Count: 1941

When you woke up, the first thing you noticed was a new glass of water, your morning pills, and a banana on the bedside table.

You’d been so caught up in your fight that you hadn’t realized you’d forgotten to take your medicine. Sebastian, apparently, had noticed. And if he laid them out for you, it would seem he wanted you to continue your treatment.

Because he was a decent person. Because it was his fault you were here. Because he pitied you. As soon as people found out you had cancer, they immediately pitied you.

But that’s all it was.

Pity.

As soon as the treatment failed, or succeeded and you were recovered from surgery, he was sure to drop the divorce papers in your lap, give you a one way plane ticket to Salt Lake City, and tell you he hopes you have a good life.

It’s what any sane person would do.

It’s more than you deserved, to be honest. After everything you’d done in your life…

As you stared at the pills, you debated with yourself.

On one hand, you promised to fight. You promised to see this to the end.

But on the other hand… you knew your track record in life. If you were being honest with yourself, you knew how this would end. And it wasn’t going to end with surgery. It wasn’t going to end with you being cancer free. It wouldn’t even end in remission.

So who were you fucking kidding?

Carefully, you swung your legs out of the bed, ignored the pills, and quietly exited the room. Your bladder was insistent, and, much as you wanted to, you couldn’t hide out in the guest room all day.

As you washed your hands, you stared at yourself in the mirror.

You look like hell, he’d said. And he was right. You lost so much weight that your cheeks were sunken. Sure, cheekbones were sexy, but not like this.

You looked like death. That’s what he should have said. It would have been more accurate. More predictive.

Walking out of the bathroom, you wondered if you should start packing up your shit. Maybe when you told the nurses that you would see them on Monday, that would be the last lie you’d ever tell. From now on, you could tell the truth. You wouldn’t be around long enough to see the fallout that blunt truth would have.

“Hey,” Sebastian greeted, startling you. He was sitting on the guest bed. “You take your medicine yet?”

“No,” you stated, beginning your new truth-telling life. Besides, he could very well see you hadn’t taken the pills, since they were untouched on the bedside table.

He swept the pills into his hand, grabbed the glass of water, and walked over to where you’d frozen in the doorway. “Take ‘em. I grabbed some takeout. It might need to be heated up a bit, but I thought it’d be easy on your stomach.”

“Seb—”

“And I’ll give you my lawyer’s number so he can help you draw up whatever papers you need to give you peace of mind that I can’t be responsible for your debt. That way you can focus on your treatment.” He shoved the glass of water in your right hand and dumped the pills in your left.

“Seb—”

“I’m not arguing with you, Y/N. Take your medicine.”

His eyes were unrelenting, so you huffed a deep sigh and downed the pills.

“Sorry for jumping on you this morning,” he said quietly.

“You don’t—”

“Shut up and let me apologize, Y/N. You were right. I didn’t really understand what I signed up for, but I don’t regret anything. I should have tried to talk to you before I yelled. I shouldn’t have made assumptions.”

“It’s okay,” you murmured.

“No, it’s not. I was wrong, Y/N. I just… When I saw all that, I got scared, okay? And I took it out on you. It wasn’t fair of me.”

What could you say to that? You nodded, hoping he’d accept that response.

Luckily, he did. You let him lead you out to the kitchen and sat on a stool while he set to work heating up the takeout.

“There’s something else we need to talk about,” he hedged.

“Okay,” you whispered.

You’d expected him to explain, but he didn’t say another word until your food was in front of you. Even then, he gave you an expectant look and waited until you took a bite. Once you swallowed, he was satisfied enough to pull out his phone and click around for a bit. “I’m surprised we’ve kept it a secret for so long, but word’s out. Someone saw us in Vegas and took a picture.”

He slid his phone across the counter to you. Right there on Entertainment Weekly’s website was a grainy picture of you, Sebastian, and Elvis in what was unmistakably a Vegas wedding.

“At least they didn’t get a picture of your face, so no one knows who you are.”

“Yet.”

“Yet,” he agreed.

Sebastian reached across the island and tucked your hair behind your ear before cupping your cheek with his hand. When he nudged your face up to look at him, he offered a small, genuine smile. “I’ll get you through this, okay? I’ll take care of the media and whatever shit comes our way from that. You just focus on the treatment.”

All week long, the only time anyone else touched you was when the nurses hooked you up to the machines. So, to feel Sebastian’s hand on your cheek was jarring in a way. It felt good.

You covered his hand with yours and gave him a weak smile.

With a decisive nod, he withdrew his hand and pushed your food closer towards you. “Good. Now eat.”

Your first mistake was telling Sebastian you felt better than you had all week.

It was a mistake because he had interpreted that as I’m definitely feeling up to leaving the apartment on a Saturday night.

And that was how you found yourself sitting in a booth at his favorite diner. No one asked any questions when he asked to be seated at the booth in the back. It was the one that had the most privacy.

As your waitress, Selena took your orders and made small talk, you kept second guessing everything you’d ever said to her. With how often you and Sebastian came here, you’d spoken with the employees here quite a bit. Outside of the hospital staff and Sebastian, they were the people you interacted with the most.

What did they know about you? What had you told them? What could they tell the media, if asked? What details about you did they remember?

“Hey, Y/N.” Sebastian waved his hand in front of your face. “Where’d you go?”

From across the diner, Selena’s laugh drew your attention momentarily.

A quick look around assured you that no one could overhear you, but you still kept your voice low. “Selena has a two year old son who had a cold two weeks ago, which is why she missed work on Wednesday and Thursday. His dad is a slime bag who bolted as soon as Selena found out she was pregnant and she works over 60 hours a week just to give her son, Timothy, what he needs. Timothy likes to be called Tim and his favorite animal right now is the elephant.”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, clearly not expecting you to say that. “Okay?”

“If I remember all of that about her, what does she remember about me? What could she tell someone else about me? Especially someone who knows how to dig into people’s pasts? I’ve talked to so many people here, and what if they remember something that helps someone figure out who I am—who I was. I know you said you’d take care of the media, but I can’t stop worrying. I’ve told you I have a shitty past and I really don’t want it to ruin your career because trust me, if the gossip in my hometown is anything to go by, people won’t understand what I did.”

Hell, people didn’t even know half of what you did.

Just as he opened his mouth to respond after a moment of considering your words, Selena came back with your food. Besides your orders, she placed two slices of pie on the table. “On the house. Gwen says you look like you need some more meat on your bones and if you don’t want the pie, tough shit.”

Sebastian laughed, and you forced a smile on your face as well. Gwen was the owner of the diner and she was a charming old lady. In the few weeks you’d been here, you realized quickly that she considered Seb like her own family and was very generous towards him. And, by extension, you.

“We wouldn’t dream of saying no to Gwen,” you said, trying not to sound as weak or anxious as you were.

“Good. I don’t want to see her come over and give y’all a piece of her mind along with that pie.” With a wink, Selena turned to take care of her only other table of the night.

When she was out of earshot, Sebastian motioned to your plate and you took a bite of your salad while rolling your eyes. You’d nearly forgotten about his insistence that you eat while he was gone.

“Marvel’s got a great PR team, Y/N. Whatever the media vultures dredge up, they’ll spin it in a good way. When I told you not to worry about the press, I meant it. And if you want to take preemptive action, we can let the PR team know what might come up and they can have a plan in place if people do dig that deep.”

As you fixed your baked potato and took a bite, you considered his words. It made sense. Didn’t mean you wouldn’t worry, though. “I’ll think about it.”

He was curious, you could tell. But you appreciated that he didn’t ask you to tell him what you were so scared of in your past. Maybe he would bring it up again when you were home, in private, but for right now, he changed the subject.

Dinner passed quickly, and when Selena came by to grab the payment, her face was more serious than you’d seen her before. “Thought I’d warn you there are some cameras out front. Brett just came back from his break and said the back way is clear if you wanna avoid them.”

Seb’s eyes darted to yours and you saw his brain turning over as he thought of the best course of action.

“I’ll run your card and be back. Let me know what you wanna do then and we’ll make it work for you.”

She left and Sebastian leaned forward. “What do you think?”

You scraped the last of the apple pie filling from the plate. While your first instinct was to consider every variable and come up with a course of action, you made the conscious effort to push down those thoughts. “You told me not to worry about the press. That’s your job, so I’m going to leave it up to you.”

In the end, you did end up sneaking out the back. Sebastian kept his arm around your shoulder as you walked through the back alley to where Sean was waiting with the car on a side street. As you got into the car, you noticed a camera flash on the other side of the street.

So they patched things up... but can this shaky relationship stand up against the media? And what is she so worried about the media finding in her past? 

Chapter 12: The Second Check-In

#sebastianxreader #sebastian stan x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #sebastian x reader #marvel fanfic #mcu

[revisionaryhistory]

Three Days ~ 59

~*~Emma~*~

The lake had been fun. It was initially awkward, but after we loaded into the boat and were underway it got better. I snagged a spot up front in the bow. I was joined by three girls, now women, I’d known well in high school. We started by talking about our current lives and by the time we'd found a spot to anchor we were telling old stories and laughing through our memories. Once the four of us had reconnected the others were easy with conversations and groupings overlapping. An hour later it felt like old times. There were lots of pictures taken and we were texting them to each other immediately. I posted some on Instagram and sent some directly to Sebastian. I had no problem posting bikini-clad pictures of me in a group, but solo went only to him. I've never been one for posting me. It's usually an activity with people.

There was a dock near the southeast border of the lake for gassing up and they had a sandwich shop. Sandwich included hot dogs, hamburgers, french fries, and onion rings. We decided to eat at the picnic tables. Stowing food was more to pack up and could stink. We were relaxing and waiting for the last ones to finish when my notification went off. Chris Evans was asking permission to follow my account. Interesting. Approved. Not a minute later so was Chace Crawford. Also approved, but with a snarky DM about his pickup lines. He'd hit on me at Kirk's wedding. Very unsuccessfully.

Emma ~ Tell Chris hi and nice to meet him.

Sebastian ~ We’re not talking about you. Much. Ok, we are. Sebastian ~ We're mostly looking at pictures.

Emma ~ The ones on your phone are much better than IG

Sebastian ~ Chace will be the one to figure that out.

 Chris DM'd me, “Can't wait to meet you in person. Hearing very sweet things.”

I sent back, "A few are true. He exaggerates."

"Yeah, he's got a huge crush on you."

"Nice to know."

We watched sunset out on the water. It was beautiful. The haze and clouds made for muted pinks, purples, blues, and grays. I took a dozen of those hoping to catch the perfect one. I was in a group of people, but the sunset had me feeling lonely. It was fleeting and I was back into the party spirit quickly.

Amy thought it was a good idea to take everyone back to our house for a pool party. I did not agree. Our parents were home babysitting their granddaughter and we were about to invade with a hoard of drunk friends. All of whom were inviting more and asking them to pick up booze. It felt very high school and in need of at least a phone call. However, it was Amy’s idea and no one wanted to hear from me last night. I wouldn’t be calling ahead.

I went inside to go to the bathroom and ran into dad. "What's all that noise we just got Katie in bed?"

"Amy invited some friends back to the pool."

"You’re teenagers again."

"Seems like it."

"Try and keep it down."

"I will tell her." Not my party. Not my crowd control. I did my business and went back outside. Amy was making out with Max in the pool. I tapped on her head, breaking their kiss, "Dad said to keep it down."

They went back to kissing. I'd deemed my message delivered and headed to the bar, putting in the code and retrieving a bottle of tequila. When I stood up, I was surprised to see Kai on the other side of the bar. Kai was the boyfriend who broke up with me after rehab. Kai's hands were shoved in the pockets of his swim shorts. He nodded toward the group, "Amy said you'd be ok with me coming. I wanted to check."

My current plan for Amy’s death was drowning. She was already in the pool after all. I pasted a less than genuine smile on my face, "It's fine, Kai. It was a long time ago. How are you?"

Kai was very southern lawyer attractive. Thinking back, he always had been. "I’m good. I did become a lawyer. Work for a firm here in Alpharetta. I got married three years ago. Her name is Melanie. We're expecting a baby in January."

"Congratulations. That’s wonderful."

He nodded, "Thank you. What are you up to?"

"I teach first grade, love it. I play in a volleyball rec league. My best friend's in a band so I go into the city and visit. My boyfriend lives there too."

Kai laughed, "I might have heard about him."

"I bet. He's a good guy. Lots of fun and good to me.”

"Better than I was, I’m sure."

Ah! This was going to be some sort of apology. I cringed and pulled up my shades for a second, "Well Kai, you did break up will me three days after I got back from rehab. You kinda failed at supportive boyfriend."

"Yeah, I did. Sorry. In hindsight, it was a shitty thing to do. Bad timing and a lie of a reason."

"I knew that."

"Sorry. I’ve always felt guilty."

I smiled, "It was a long time ago, Kai. We've grown up. We're both doing well."

"I wish we could go back to friends again. We were friends since middle school."

I don't think he realized that made it worse. We’d been friends before we were anything else and none of that mattered when he left me. It didn’t matter to me now. “I stopped being angry with you a very, very long time ago, Kai. Forgave you for leaving me when I needed you. But there’s no reason for us to be friends now. I come back a couple of times a year. You and I are strangers now. And while I have forgiven you, I’d never trust you again.” His guilt is not a reason for me to welcome him back into my life.

“Wow.” He looked surprised.

I smiled, “I wish nothing but the best for you.”  I leaned back to see under the bar and brought up a couple of glasses. “Drink to old times?”

He looked surprised again. “Yeah, Em.”

“Good.” I poured the tequila and tapped my glass against his. “To happy memories and years of fun times.”

We both drank and he walked around to my side of the bar. It was my turn to be surprised when he hugged me, “I wish nothing but the best for you too, Emma.”

I patted his back, “Thank you.”

Kai let go and walked back toward the pool.

I tell you what, this has been the strangest visit I’ve ever had and that’s saying a lot. I’m starting to get paranoid about what the next three days are going to bring. I poured another tequila and questioned my decision to not hop back on a plane last night. I could be home in my bed or in the city tucked into Sebastian’s bed waiting for him to get home or out with Eli and Angie. All preferable to this mixed bag of what the fuck.

I hung out for another hour before letting Amy I was heading to bed. Family day was supposed to start at about noon. That gave me time to sleep in a little, go for a run, and shower before arrivals started. Of course, because I had time to sleep in, I woke up at my normal time. I texted Sebastian, saying good morning, and was pleasantly surprised when his face showed up on my phone.

“It’s morning, but good is a stretch.”

He looked a little rough, but still handsome. “Good night with the boys?”

Sebastian nodded then winced, “Very.” He filled me in on his night. There’d been lots of laughs and he gave me back story on any conversations. I liked watching him talk. In his hungover state, he was less animated than usual, but his expressions and eyes still conveyed a range of emotions. I laughed at the late-night stories. My favorite was Chris edging between Chace and Sebastian in the bathroom, sharing a urinal with Seb because he couldn’t wait.

My stories weren’t nearly as funny. It’s possible things got out of hand after I’d gone to bed. I’m sure Amy would fill me in. I told him about the conversation with Kai.

“Ouch, you’re tough.”

I rolled to my side, putting the phone against the pillow, “It’s not my responsibility to ease his guilt.”

“True.”

“If we were going to be around each other my response might have been different, but there’s no reason. Haven’t seen him in twelve years, likely won’t for at least that long. We talked at the party, laughed. We’re just not going to be friends.”

“No, no, I get it.” He was shaking his head. “I think you might still be a little angry.”

I laughed, “Maybe I should have been less direct. I wasn’t expecting to see him. More indifferent than angry.”

“I don’t know if you should have. I just don’t want to be on the receiving end of your directness. The indifferent version.” He smiled with his using my word instead of his “angry”. “You were pretty direct with Drew in the bar too. I like you having a little bite.” He looked like he was thinking and I stayed quiet. “You are incredibly kind until you’re not. I mean, I think you give everyone the benefit of the doubt, but once they cross over the line where you don’t trust them you have no problem putting them in their place. That’s a good thing. Sometimes people don’t deserve the benefit of the doubt.”

“Ed tells me I let people get away with too much.”

“Do you think so?”

“Sometimes. I can give too many chances. It all depends on how much I care about someone and the size of the bad behavior. I think I’m usually direct and kind at the same time, but when I’ve had enough, I’ve had enough.”

“I tend to sugar coat too much. Then get pissy when nothing changes and sometimes it’s because I wasn’t clear.”

Now I had a question. “Are you sugar-coating and think I was mean to Kai?”

“I was imagining being on the receiving end. I wouldn’t have liked it, but, no, I don’t think you were mean.”

“You’d have to fuck up a lot.” Sebastian’s opinion was important. “I’m direct with the good stuff too.”

“I know you are.” His blue eyes lit up with his smile. “I always know where I stand, how you feel.”

Not always. Not right now. “You read me bedtime stories when I’m sad.”

“And you ask me what I need when I’m anxious.”

“Quite the pair.”

“Yes, we are.”

We just looked at each other for a long time. “Your flight is at three.”

“Twelve, moved up to squeeze in a dinner tonight.”

I looked at the time on my phone, “You need to get to the airport.”

“Yeah.” He turned the camera where I could see his bags. “All packed. I’ll call you when I get back to the hotel for our date.”

Our phone sex date. I smiled and kissed my screen, “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Definitely.”

I laid in bed for a few more minutes, just enjoying being happy, before I got up and got dressed to go for a run.  Mom and dad were already downstairs having coffee. I walked around the table, kissing both of their cheeks, “I’m going for a run before everyone gets here.”

Mom nodded over her cup, “How late was everyone here last night?”

I shrugged, “I went to bed about ten. Long day in the sun and then old friends showing up. I was done. Kai showed up. That was less than fun.”

“You left your sister to manage all your friends?”

Notice how they failed to ask how I was after an unexpected visit from my ex-boyfriend. I know I did. I thought about the conversation with Sebastian and what he’d said about some people not deserving the benefit of the doubt. The other night was the first time I’d been so confrontational with my parents in a very long time. Like since I was sixteen right before I moved to Seattle. I took a deep breath and tried to pull in some of the calmness I’d had upstairs in bed. “Guys, we’re almost thirty, not thirteen. Hopefully, we’ve grown out of getting so drunk we knock over patio furniture and throw up in the pool. If not, they are Amy’s problem. They are her friends, not mine. She invited them over. I haven’t seen most of these people for over ten years. And are you telling me in addition to not talking too much about my boyfriend or anything else that makes me happy, I am also expected to babysit my sister?”

“Emma, you’re overreacting.”

Again, with the fucking overreacting. I’m not an overreactor. If anything, I’m an underreactor. I’m positive I’m not overeating here. I guess it’s nice to know it’s not they don’t like Sebastian and don’t want to talk about him. They don’t want to talk about Kai either and I know they liked him. I muttered, “Unbelievable”, as I headed for the front door.

I ran far longer than I'd planned.

It took a long time to calm my mind and get into the zone. What often happens once I let go of my thoughts and get into a rhythm is that the thoughts organize themselves. When I stopped or during cool down I could see things more clearly. What I saw when I slowed my pace to a walk wasn't pretty. It had been my choice to leave rehab when it was no longer good for me. It had been my choice to call Ed to get me away from here when it was no longer good for me. I don't remember my parents favoriting Amy before that summer. Twenty-three days that strengthened me and weakened Amy. Broke my family and gave me a new one.

Choices, even ones that are good for you, have consequences. A tangled web of choices and consequences have led to now. This isn't my home. My parents' focus, as it had been since I went to Seattle or before, was Amy. I didn't agree with how they sheltered her, but I hadn't been here. In their view I was strong, I was fine, and they didn't have to worry about me. I had another family to worry about me. When I thought about it like this, it made sense. I'd left because being here was a threat to me. Now me being here was a threat to Amy. The situation was fucked. We'd all done the best we could. We still were. If what I'd told Sebastian was true, I wouldn't change anything if it meant I didn't know Ed, Jill, Olivia, and Harper. I had to accept the negatives too. I don't know what that means for the future, but as Ed tells me I put up with things too long sometimes.

I arrived back at the house as everyone was finishing breakfast. I'd separated myself from family time by taking a run. Or maybe I'd taken a run because I was separate from my family. I poured a cup of coffee and joined them at the table, helping myself to the container of Greek yogurt and covering it with berries. Blueberries for Sebastian and raspberries for me. That made me smile.

After I showered Amy and I went to pick up my grandparents. Amy told me what happened after I'd gone to bed, including her and Max having sex on the big round double lounger. I told her... nothing. I didn’t tell her about my fights with our parents, I didn’t tell her about the conversation with Kai. I most certainly didn't tell her about my phone sex date later with Sebastian, the early morning just woke up FaceTime, or how he'd read me Winnie the Pooh until I fell asleep. I hated it. I hated how yesterday we were back to talking like sisters and today it was not. Again, my choice, but I knew she’d tell our parents, which under any other circumstance would be fine, but I could not take any more. I could, but I didn’t want to.

The back yard easily held the gathering of aunts, uncles, and cousins. Kids played in the pool while adults talked with glasses of sangria and bottles of beer. The last stragglers were finishing their drinks when Katie crawled into my lap. She wanted me to take her to bed and read her a story. When the book was done, she curled up next to me, looked up, and said, "I love you, Emma."

I kissed her nose, "I love you, too.”

I joined my parents and sister in the family room. Amy explained they hadn't known how long I'd be with Katie and had started a movie without me. I lied and said it was fine, I'd seen it. There couldn't have been much left when “Dancing Queen” started playing from my phone. I stood up, "That’s Sebastian. He's in Canada. I'm going to take it upstairs. See you in the morning."

Mom yelled after me, "We need to leave at nine-thirty."

"OK." I connected the call, "Hey, baby, how was your flight and dinner?"

"Bumpy."

"Which one?"

"Both." His laughter was a balm that smoothed away the roughness of the day. "How was the barbeque and why can't I see you?"

I shut the door behind me and switched the call to video. "I was waiting until I could get you alone."

Sebastian put his arms across his chest, "What kind of a boy do you think I am?"

"A very handsome one." The top three buttons of his white dress shirt were unbuttoned and his tie hung loosely around his neck. "Damn, you look good."

"So do you."

I was in a plain peach t-shirt. He didn't care. To him, I looked good. I went back to his question, "It was fun. Caught up with lots of family. Watched kids in the pool. Mostly sat with my grandparents. Granny was happy to hold my hand and tell me I’m beautiful."

Sebastian's mouth dropped open in a gasp, "I like doing that too." He turned his head to the side looking over my face, "You don't look sad, but you don't look happy either. What's going on with you?"

I looked up for an answer, "I am accepting the reality of the situation. This isn't really home or really my family anymore. Their priority is Amy."

His face fell, "I’m sorry, baby. What can I do? What do you need?"

I smiled a real smile, "Nothing I don't already have." I could see he was struggling to believe me. "Since we were sixteen, they took care of Amy and Ed took care of me. I didn't realize exactly what that meant. Amy is doing better than she ever has. I always thought that when Amy was better." I stopped myself to figure out how I wanted to say this. "It took me coming home while things are good to realize it doesn't matter. Even if she is fine it's all a house of cards. I expected at some time things would be normal, but it won't be. I am changing my expectations."

"How do stop expecting your parents to support you?"

Good question. "You know why Jimmy and I broke up."

"He cheated."

"My parents do not. Amy didn't until Friday."

"Why not?" Sebastian's sadness for me was tinged with anger.

The list of things my parents didn’t know was long. "Just telling them we'd split. I felt like I might drown. The way they wanted to baby and take care of me felt like an anchor around my neck, like I was incapable of surviving a breakup. When I came here for Christmas, they had all these ideas for my life, but they never asked what I wanted. I knew if I told them he'd cheated it would be ten times worse. Does this make any sense?" It wasn't completely clear to me so how could it be to him.

Sebastian rubbed his fingers over his beard, pulling at the grey patch. "I hurt my knee once. They told me to take it easy for twenty-four hours, ice it, stay off it. Then I had exercises and had to move. Walking hurt like hell but it was the best thing if I wanted to heal. Your parents wanted you on bed rest when what you needed was PT. Support to get on your feet. Support should help, not cripple you."

"Exactly!" I smiled and ran my fingers over the video version of his face. "So not having their support isn’t new. I am working on accepting that's not going to change." I watched Sebastian bite his lip and let it slip free. "What's that about?"

"I feel lucky to know you. I'm so fucking proud of you. You don't get stuck in self-pity; you dig yourself out. It's the difference between seeing yourself as a victim or just someone who had something bad happen. They keep Amy stuck and Ed taught you resilience."

My heart stopped and I forgot how to breathe. Not in the good way. In the almost a panic attack way.

"I can do that with work, most things. Relationships." He scrunched up his face and rocked his head from side to side. "I'm learning."

"I'm not always good at it either." Sometimes I needed my ass kicked.

"That’s ok. I'll be here to help. You're still learning too."

I felt a slow smile form across my face and Sebastian raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you supposed to be teaching me something tonight?"

I fought back the laugh at the way he squeezed his eyes shut and scrunched up his face. It took a good ten seconds for him to come back to me. I let go of the lip I was biting, "You ok there?"

"You cause me physical pain." He chuckled and smiled looking at me.

I don't think he minds all that much. "Where's it hurt, baby?" I dropped the tone and volume of my voice.

He made the face again and pointed his finger at me. "Turn off the camera."

My eyes went wide, "Why?"

"The first time I watch you get yourself off is going to be live."

"You have a lot of phone sex rules, Bastian." Still, I switched the phone to voice only. My screen went dark. I pouted. Not that he could see.

"Stop pouting and tell me what you're wearing."

I resisted the urge to tell him if he let me turn the damned camera back on, I'd show him. I didn't need to be taught how to do this. I was confident I could wing it just fine. What I didn’t know was if this was to be purely descriptive, giving each other instructions, or a role-play. It didn't matter. Any would be fun.

"I have on a peach t-shirt. It's not tight, but it fits against my body. Soft. My shorts are white. If you listen close, I bet you can hear me unzip them," I moved my phone lower to make sure he could. I left the phone by my hip, "I'm going to go ahead and take them off. My legs are smooth against my fingers."

"Take off your shirt too. Tell me about your bra and panties." His voice had taken on the timbre it gets when he's turned on.

"Nothing special. No one to see them. Simple white cotton. They do look nice against my tan."

"Next time we're together I’m licking those tan lines."

"Mmm, I'm looking forward to that. Tell me about you."

"Dressed from dinner. Black pants, long sleeve white shirt, black tie. You saw. Tie undone. A couple of buttons open and sleeves rolled up."

"Unbutton them all, but leave your shirt on. I like you undone. What’s going on with your pants?"

"They're tight. I’m not completely hard."

"Take them off. Rub yourself over your boxers. I love feeling you grow in my hand or my mouth. Your skin is so soft."

"Spread your legs. Touch yourself. Over your panties. I want them wet.” I heard a change in his breathing. Subtle. “I’m hard. Had to adjust my boxers. My cock's up toward my stomach where I can rub the underside. Feels good." He let out a little moan and I could easily imagine the little smile on his face.

"Take your cock out. I've got my hand over my pussy. Massaging myself. Warm. Panties are a little damp. I can tell I'm wet though. I can feel it."

"What's it like, Emma?"

"All the blood’s rushed between my legs. There's an ache, a throbbing, almost like I can feel my heart beating. An itch I need to scratch."

"My hand's around my cock. Slow strokes along the whole length. I flip my thumb over the tip every so often." His breath caught. "Hits the spot, you know the one, sends a jolt, like a shock through me. Feels even better when it's your tongue."

"Fuck. Your talking has me squirming. My hand is in my panties. My middle finger sliding from my clit to inside me. So slippery. How tight is your grip?"

"Tight. Not stroking my length anymore. Turned my hand around where my thumbs against the vein. Holding tight above the middle to the edge of the head. Feels good. Thinking about you touching your clit."

"Moving up and down, kind of slow. Tightening my muscles like you're inside me."

Words stopped, but it wasn't quiet.

Our breathing had synced up and there were these little catches, sighs, and soft moans.

"Faster and firmer now."

"Me too. I'm close."

I might not be able to see him, but I knew exactly what he looked like. His face, his body, were starting to tense.

"Feels good. Not as good as you touching me. Not even close."

"If I was there, I'd put my hand over yours. Feel how you like to be touched. So, I can match it. I'd kiss along your neck, taste you. My other hand, my fingers, barely touching your side, over your hip, across your thigh." The last word was interrupted.

" Em... fuck... yes..." Then a few seconds of silence followed by a long sigh.

"Where are you, baby?"

"Unhooked my bra. Nipples so tight."

"Perfect for me to suck on. I'd use my teeth. Run my hand up your inner thigh. Touching close. I can look down and see you touching yourself. God, how much I want to shove your hand away and taste you. Make you come."

"Oh fuck... Bastian." Everything tightened up then let go.

His voice was in my ear, "Turn your camera back on."

When I picked the phone up off my chest his face was already there. I hit the button and saw my face appear in the small rectangle. "Now you want to see me." I stretched with a contented sigh.

"I always want to see you after you come. The way your mouth is open and you lick your lips. Beautiful."

I rolled to my side, "What's an orgasm feel like for you?"

"Tonight. Mmm, for a while it just felt good. Like any touch, nothing special, except the where. Only more. Then it's like a switch. Goes from feels good to oh shit this is amazing. Starts where I’m touching and spreads down to my balls and lower stomach, base of my spine. It's like tightening a spring until it can't anymore and just let’s go."

"Is sex different? The orgasm."

"Oh yeah." His smile and eyes told me he drifted away a little. "I'll tell you all about it next time we have sex." Sebastian raised his eyebrows expectantly.

"Similar. Like you said just feels good. More of a building for me though. Sometimes it's a slow steady increase. Other times like stair steps. I have to remind myself to relax or I clench my butt and thighs too much."

"I've noticed this. You start to rise off the bed and I have to hold you down." He was clearly enjoying the memory. "Does it change how it feels?"

I nodded, "Tightening up takes the focus away. Eventually, everything gets warm, tingly, and tightens up. Finally, it's like a wave breaking on the shore with muscle contractions."

"I feel those."

"I like the resistance of having something to hold onto." His eyes had questions. I had to search for a workable metaphor. "If you're sitting in a chair and lift your foot you can feel your thigh tighten, but if you're on a leg machine with weights you feel that muscle more."

Awareness hit him, "Really?" I nodded again. "I knew you liked, but I like knowing the why." He laughed, "I love these talks."

I joined in his laughter, "It is fun."

"Hang on a sec." He laid his phone next to him and I could hear him moving around.

"What are you doing?"

Sebastian picked his phone back up, "There was a mess to clean up."

It is so sexy that he told me this. The whole conversation is sexy. Lying in bed a thousand miles apart having a casual chat about a not at all casual topic is sexy as fuck.

"What did you use?" I was amused.

He looked at me with disbelief. Not sure if it was the question or that he was going to answer. "My underwear. They were nearby." He stood up and lifted the tie as he walked. "Can I get rid of this now?"

"Do I get to see your bare chest?"

"Do I get... ok well, there we go. Thank you."

I'd shifted my camera lower and flashed him naked breasts before he finished asking. I moved back to my face, "You're welcome."

He held his phone out where I could watch him free his arm and be shirtless. I made an appreciative noise and he asked, "Enjoying yourself?"

"I am." I hadn’t intended to lick my lips. "I'd like to lay by a pool with you. Or a beach."

"Easily arranged." He stretched out on the bed. "What haven't we done that you want to do?"

"In general, or sex."

He shrugged, "Sex is the topic. Tonight anyway."

"I want you to give me a full body massage that veers off track to a happy ending."

"That will be just as much fun for me." His face showed his interest. "I want you to tie me to the bed, blindfold me, and do whatever you want to me."

I sat up enough to take my bra off, giving him another peek "We're going to need a weekend locked in one of our bedrooms."

"My weekend is free. I think I have company coming Thursday."

"My departure time keeps creeping up to get to you sooner.”

He sang, "Oh what a lucky boy."

“Pretty soon I’ll get there before you, waiting on the floor outside your apartment.” I got hit with a memory, "We need to talk about your birthday. What do you want?"

"Well, that depends on how you feel about birthday sex? I like birthday sex. Not a deal-breaker, not my preference, but fun for a change."

He stretched out on the bed and stuck his phone to his leg. I could see chest up. I propped my head upon my hand and adjusted my phone. "I'm speaking from limited experience here." Sebastian tried very hard not to smile. He failed, but he tried. "You're such a man."

He stopped trying, "You're such a woman." His laughter was a wonderful sound.

"Less than good experience the first time because neither of us realized the amount of prep work required." He winced. I shrugged. "Next time I’d researched. I liked it, he didn't. He was too in his head, worried about being dirty. Then there's you. I knew what I was doing more in theory than practice."

"You should feel free to practice on me anytime you want." He cocked his head to the side. "You can come in and brush your teeth while I pee, but that's as far as I want to go there."

"Women have complete conversations while trading places in a bathroom."

"The group bathroom break cracks me up."

"We don't want to stop talking or want to talk about a cute guy in private."

"Mostly the last one." He wasn't wrong. "Oh..." he shook his head and pulled his eyebrows down, "not into period sex. But you've got an IUD. Do you even have a period?"

"Nope, happy side effect." Condoms eliminated the need for the birth control talk. "How do you know I have an IUD? Can you feel the strings?"

"My fingers are up there a lot."

I smirked, "You're dirty."

"About to be dirtier. Turn off your camera."

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan fanfiction #fanfiction #sebastian stan X ofc #marvel actor fanfiction

[charanteleclerc]

you’re in my mind (under my skin)

A/N: This is for sloangreytrash who requested simi! Sorry it’s taken a while, hope everyone enjoys!

The first time Seb saw him, he was wasted. Seriously wasted. He’d been drinking steadily since about midday, flipping between heartbroken, raging and pretending getting dumped was the best thing in the world with every other drink. He’d anticipated the break-up - he’d have been blind not to see it coming - but it didn’t really make it hurt any less.

He’d convinced his friends that going out was a good idea, or maybe he hadn’t, and they’d planned on going out anyway. It was a Friday after all. Dan had abandoned them almost as soon as they’d gotten to the club, and Seb didn’t blame him. He’d seen him hanging off a tall, ridiculously good-looking man. If he’d been quicker, he’d definitely have tried his luck, but the guy seemed pretty preoccupied by Dan now. Jenson and Charles were still with him though, Jenson from actual sympathy, Charles was probably still here because his latest crush hadn’t been spotted yet. Not that he’d admit it, he was kinda glad, in a selfish way. He loved Charles like a little brother (it didn’t matter that Charles was less than a year younger than him, it was still younger), and he didn’t blame Dan and Charles for not wanting to stick with him the entire evening. But, company was company. And company also loves misery, misery such as Jenson also trying to bleach his brain with alcohol.

Break-up’s were hard.

“You know what?” Seb banged his glass down on the table, making Jenson jump. “Fuck ‘em. You deserve better. I deserve better.”

“We deserve better.” Jenson nodded, his eyes a little unfocused. “Why?”

“Because we just do.” Seb explained. “Charles, Charles, go find your boy. Because me and Jenson, we’re gonna pull tonight.”

“We are?” Jenson blinked. Charles looked like he was watching a funny car crash in motion. Part distressed but part hilarious.

“You are?”

Seb nodded. “Yes. Yes we are. We are going to get over our shitty ex-boyfriends, we’re going to get them out of our systems, and we are going to do that by getting drunk, then getting under somebody else.”

“You’re a genius.” Jenson said solemnly. “I’m gonna go. Find someone. To get under.”

“Jenson, Jense…” Seb grabbed onto Jenson’s arm, grinning like a maniac. “I don’t wanna see you until your walk of shame tomorrow.”

“Got it.” Jenson finger-gunned, walking away a little unsteadily. Seb sent a satisfied grin at Charles, who still looked distressed but was definitely struggling not to laugh.

“It’s a brilliant plan!” Seb protested.

“Sure, sure.” Charles snickered, the amused part of him finally winning out. “Whatever, I’m going to find someone interesting.”

“Is it Pierre?”

Seb couldn’t see Charles blush in the low light, but he was pretty sure it was there. “Just somebody.” Charles said, before leaning over to give Seb a quick hug. “Love you. Come find me if you need to.”

“Love you too. Go find your booty call.” Seb teased, ignoring the glare he got in return. He didn’t care, Charles would eventually come to his senses and realise that he’d been head over heels for Pierre since he’d set eyes on him, but it wasn’t his problem. Or more accurately, it wasn’t his problem right now.

He stood up, scanning the room. He needed to dance, and he wanted another drink. He just wanted to forget that Mark even existed, and the easiest way to do that was vodka. Or tequila. Alcohol in general.

“One vodka shot.” He motioned at the bartender. The guy standing next to him made a noise. “What?”

“Do you think you’re up to that?” The guy smirked. Seb glared. Was this guy assuming he couldn’t handle his alcohol? By a look? He didn’t know his life. He could make his own goddamn life choices.

“Totally am.” Seb replied, jaw set. “Are you?”

“Always.” The guy replied. Seb’s drink appeared before him, and he didn’t even stop to think before he was throwing it down his throat, determined to prove a point.

“What do you say to that?” Seb challenged. The guy shrugged.

“Maybe I should buy you another?” He offered. Seb narrowed his eyes, before nodding.

“Double.”

“Brave.” The guy smirked. “But sure. Two vodka doubles.”

Well, at least he was getting the drunk part of his checklist done.

                                                            ~*~

Seb stepped off of the bus, slowly making his way towards his house. The sun was just about rising, and he looked wrecked. He knew that, he felt it as well. But a one-night stand was exactly what he’d aimed for, and why not? Hard, fast, drunken sex. And he’d only thought about Mark once, and he was pretty proud of that. Small steps.

He unlocked the front door, trying to shut it as quietly as possible. He loved Dan, Charles and Jenson like family (and they really were, to be honest), but he also knew that they’d tease him about this for days.

He snuck into the kitchen, cursing when Dan was already there, making a couple of coffees. Dan grinned, snickering. “Want a coffee?”

“Sure.” Seb muttered, sinking onto a chair. So goes his cunning plan. “What are you doing up at 6am?”

“The question you should be asking is ‘why haven’t you gone to bed yet Dan’?” Dan look very satisfied with himself. Seb rolled his eyes.

“Why haven’t you gone to bed yet Dan?” He parroted back, obediently.

“Because of the incredibly gorgeous guy still in my bed.” Dan replied smugly. “The sex is -”

“I don’t want to know.” Seb groaned, putting his hands over his ears.

“I’m assuming you had a good night?” Dan asked. “As you’re only getting back now?”

“Best way to get over someone is to get under someone.” Seb chanted, making grabby hands at the coffee. “Please Dan. I need.”

Dan took pity on him, handing him a mug. “Is it going to be a ‘might see them again’ situation? Or a ‘person at the right time’ situation?”

“The second.” Seb mumbled, before taking a gulp of coffee. “Go get back to bed. Incredibly gorgeous guy might start to think you’ve found a better option.”

Dan made a noise, a dazed grin on his face. “Seb, this guy knows there’s no-one better.” He grabbed the two coffees, giving Seb a goofy grin. “Don’t interrupt.”

“Don’t give me a reason to!” Seb called after his housemate, focusing on the coffee. Dan was an idiot, but he was also a genius in the kitchen, and he was the only one in the house who could actually make a decent coffee with their demon of a kettle.

He heard the front door open and close softly, and Jenson appeared, his face falling when he saw Seb sitting at the table. “It was your idea.” Jenson warned, attempting to stop the inevitable teasing.

Seb grinned. “Well, you’re unlucky enough that you’re going to have to make your own coffee. You missed Dan.”

Jenson groaned. “I hate you and your insanely good coffee.”

“No you don’t.”

“Can I go and wake him up?”

“Um… not unless you want to be scarred for life by the sight of his butt.” Seb admitted. “He’s still got a guest.”

Jenson made a face. “What time did you get here?”

“About five minutes ago.” Seb yawned. “I’m going to try and grab a nap.”

“Worn yourself out?” Jenson grinned. “If you’re doing that, can I have your coffee?”

“No. Fuck off.” Seb cradled his mug to his chest. “This is mine.”

“I hate you.” Jenson called as Seb stood up, walking off towards his bedroom.

“No you don’t!”

                                                               ~*~

Seb saw him next at the library, when he was a few hours into an essay and only fuelled by Red Bull and a cheese toastie. The guy dropped into the seat opposite him, the same smirk on his face from the night at the club. It took Seb a few minutes to even notice he was sat there, too focused on the fact he was writing something that was pure bullshit. Hopefully good bullshit. Seb blinked when he looked up, seeing the guy there. What was his name again? Chris? Kevin?

“You look like you could do with a break?” The guy said. Seb just blinked again. Was he beginning to hallucinate? Because he could see his one-night stand telling him he looked stressed. “Do you want to grab a coffee?”

“No.” Seb said quickly. “Er, no, if I have anymore caffeine I might have a heart attack.” He explained, still feeling confused. And a little guilty. The guy’s smirk got even… smirkier? How was that even possible?

“Okay. Would you like to grab a cup of water then?”

Seb nodded dumbly, then shook himself. “I do really need finish this.” He said apologetically. The guy shrugged.

“I can wait.” He said, settling back into his chair. “Wake me when you finish.”

Seb blinked as the guy tipped his hat over his face, and almost immediately fell asleep. Seb turned in his seat, looking around, half expecting a camera crew to jump out from behind a bookcase. It had to be a prank. One-night stands don’t just appear out of nowhere and fall asleep in front of you!

When no camera crew appeared, and the guy - Ken? - still seemed to be fast asleep, Seb went back to his essay, feeling slightly unsettled. He’d thought that they’d both understood what was expected, which really only came down to two things - have mind blowing sex (and it had been mind blowing), followed quickly by never talking to each other again. He was holding up his end so well that he’d even forgotten the guy’s name! He hadn’t even known the guy was a student until now. Unless he was a faculty member. Shit, was he a faculty member? He could really do without the complications that would bring.

He kept dragging the attention back to his essay, only letting himself sneak a glance a couple of times. He could ignore him. It was possible. But he didn’t really remember writing the last bit of his essay. Too preoccupied. Although he wasn’t really sure what he was saying in the rest of the essay either. He packed up his laptop, hesitating a little before leaning over to give the guy a shove.

“Hey, er, hey.” Seb said quietly. The guy started a little, looking at Seb from under his hat.

“You’re finished?”

Seb nodded, looking at his bag. “You’ve been asleep about two hours.” He added. The guy didn’t look fussed.

“That’s okay. Coffee? Or water?” The guy asked again. Seb nodded, still confused about the entire situation, but willing to go along with it for now.

“Lead the way.”

                                                          ~*~

Okay, so it was less a one-night stand, more a two-night stand. What could he say. The guy was a smooth talker when he wanted to be.

Still hadn’t learnt his name though.

They’d gone for coffee, and they’d lasted about 20 minutes before Seb had fallen for the smooth voice and the calm confidence. And that smirk . That smirk did something to a guy. They’d tried for pretence of actually talking, but Seb couldn’t say what they’d talked about. He remembers him staring, and feeling increasingly turned on, and then he was receiving the best blowjob he’d ever had. He didn’t even care that he was getting sucked off in a coffee shop toilet. With Mark, they’d never do anything so spontaneous. Everything about them had been formulaic, and just the fact that he was doing something risky, slutty even, just made him feel fantastic.

He collapsed onto the sofa, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t tell his housemates. At all. He’d get knowing looks and remarks and he still wasn’t sure what this was. He could hear someone coming down the stairs, and he flung a pillow over his face. Maybe he could just hide here.

“Seb?” Charles sounded like he was above him. Seb pulled the pillow off, staring up. Charles was grinning down at him.

“Hi.” Seb said. He wasn’t going to tell anyone, and Charles wasn’t going to be able to tell from just his face. Hopefully.

“You look like your having a dilemma.” Charles said happily, patting Seb’s head. “What’s wrong?”

“I had a blowjob in a coffee shop toilet.” Seb said, eyes widening and slapping a hand over his mouth. “Shit. No I didn’t.”

“You… what?” Charles looked shocked. Seb just stared up at him, and then Charles burst into laughter. Seb glared.

“It’s not funny.”

“Yes, yes it is.” Charles cackled. “You slut! Who was he?”

“The guy from the club.” Seb replied sadly. “He found me at the library.”

Charles continued to snicker, moving around the sofa and sitting on Seb’s legs. Seb wiggled, making himself comfortable. Charles wasn’t exactly heavy, just a little awkward. “Do you want a hug?” Charles asked, looking serious. Or as serious as he could whilst he kept on letting out little bursts of laughter. Seb nodded, moving his arms so Charles could lie down, wrapping his arms around him once Charles was settled.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Charles asked. Seb shook his head.

“I need to think about it first. But thanks.” Seb replied. “Have you talked to Pierre since the other night?”

Charles shrugged. “A little. Nothing happened, that night. I just crashed there.”

“No judgement.” Seb said quietly. “I mean, I really can’t now.”

“Nope, you can’t.” Charles started to laugh again. “I never thought you’d be such an exhibitionist.”

“Neither did I.” Seb replied honestly. “It just kinda felt right, y’know?”

Charles nodded. “I get it. Just, be safe. Don’t let yourself get broken.”

“I will.” Seb sighed. “I promise.”

                                                        ~*~

He was a liar. A complete and utter liar, and he couldn’t even start to feel mad. He hadn’t even meant to run into the guy again - Keith? He should really ask him for his name - but the guy had appeared beside him after football practice, leering at him in a slightly sinister but ridiculously sexy way. He really shouldn’t be blamed for anything that happened after. He was high on exercise, and the guy happened to be there, he wasn’t responsible for anything. At all.

Though he was really starting to enjoy sex in semi-public places. Or maybe it was just sex in semi-public places with him. Seb really wasn’t sure.

And now he kind of wanted to find this guy. Maybe even talk to him. He had a right to be curious, he’d had sex with him three times now. Finding out his name would at least be helpful. It wasn’t exactly like he could just wander round campus asking if anyone had seen a really sexy guy with a lazy smile. Well, he could. But he wasn’t going to to.

“Okay, so you don’t know anything about this guy?” Jenson asked, sounding a little alarmed. “Seb, he could be like… I don’t know, a serial killer!”

“I’m still alive.” Seb muttered, blushing a little as his housemates all fixed him with stern looks. “Sorry.”

“You really don’t even know his name?” Dan asked, perplexed. “Nothing?”

“His name starts with K. I wasn’t really preoccupied with his name the first time I talked to him, and then it just became awkward. And we don’t really spend much time talking.”

“Too busy have sex in public places.” Charles teased. “Okay, so we start with nothing. How about someone goes somewhere with you? Then he has to introduce himself.”

Seb could’ve kissed him in that moment. “You’re a true genius Charles. Pierre doesn’t know what he’s missing.”

Charles blushed. “It’s just an idea.”

“A brilliant idea!” Seb exclaimed. “So what, I’ll just wait at my lectures for you guys?”

Dan nodded. “We’ll find this guy. He can’t be that elusive.”

                                                           ~*~

The problem was, none of them had considered the fact that they were all tied up themselves. Dan was consistently late to meeting Seb, and always with Jev hanging off his arm. Seb tried not to feel jealous, and tried his hardest not to feel like a third wheel, but he didn’t want to get in the way. And Jenson and Charles were both crushing hard, and as far as Seb could see, their affections were being returned, except no-one was saying anything. Nico and Pierre were great guys, and Seb didn’t want to get in the way again. True love was always difficult to achieve when your lovesick housemate was hanging around in a slightly awkward way. So the constant supervision was dropped, and he was back to being slightly lonely, and just waiting for the guy to appear from the shadows.

Except he didn’t.

A week turned into two, then three, and quickly a month had gone by without a sight of the the guy. Not even a whisper. And honestly, he was okay with it. It wasn’t something to mourn, and in reality, had helped him a lot. It’d stopped him moping about Mark, and gave him something to focus on. Maybe he didn’t need it now. His housemates weren’t giving him sympathetic looks anymore, when Seb saw him. He was spending more and more time at the library, needing the excuse to get out of the house. Jenson and Charles had come to their senses, and three couples surrounding him, it became a little stifling.

He was in one of his self-imposed exiles, having found it difficult to concentrate with whatever Dan and Jev would doing above him. He’d fled to the library, and hadn’t even realised he was in his pyjamas until he’d arrived. Thankfully it was nearly midnight, hopefully no-one he knew would see him like this.

So when he woke (he didn’t know when he fell asleep, but a while ago considering the lines of text he’d typed with his head), the guy was sitting opposite him, looking amused.

“Late night?”

Seb gaped, opening and shutting his mouth a few times before nodding. “Yeah, um, all my housemates are having sex.”

The guy raised an eyebrow, grinning. “And you’re not joining in?”

“Not like that!” Seb exclaimed, flustered. The first time he sees this guy in weeks, and he’s camped out in the library like a homeless person, with probably impressive bedhead and in his pyjamas. Someone should really just put him out of his misery. “Not with each other, with their boyfriends. Like normal people.”

“And you’re not because…?”

“I don’t have a boyfriend.” Seb mumbled. “Or girlfriend. Or friend at the minute.”

The guy just kept on staring, before standing up. “My place is nearby. If you want to be somewhere that isn’t this library.”

“I’m in my pyjamas.” Seb got out. The guy just continued to smirk.

“I can see that.”

Seb nodded, jumping up and packing up his stuff. He hadn’t brought much, and he didn’t pack it with too much thought. He was still having trouble processing that the guy was here, and he’d seen him at his absolute worst.

They didn’t say anything on the walk to the guys house. What did they really have to talk about, really? Seb wasn’t sure why he’d been invited back - well, he had an idea, but still. It didn’t feel like the other times. He vaguely recognised the flat they stopped at, a distant memory from an alcohol hazy night. He hadn’t really had time to actually look at the flat, and it was nice. Cozy.

“Do you have any housemates?” Seb asked lowly. The guy shook his head.

“Don’t get on well with most people.” Came the curt response. Seb nodded, like that made sense. He’d never really had a problem with people, well, most people. He walked around the room, being drawn to the varying trophies that sat on a bookcase.

1st place Karting Regionals - Kimi Raikkonen

“Kimi.” Seb breathed. “I knew it started with K.”

“Do you want a drink?” Kimi asked, and it felt good being able to give him a name. Kimi. Seb shook his head, yawning.

“I’m good, thank you.” He smiled, sitting down awkwardly on the sofa. “You’ve already done enough saving me from the horrors of the library.”

“Well, if you ever need to just get away…” Kimi shrugged. “You’re always welcome.”

“Why?” Seb blurted out. Fuck his stupid ability to never shut up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean -”

“It’s okay.” Kimi smirked. “I don’t know, I like you? You seem interesting.”

Seb nodded, still feeling a little lost. “But, I still don’t understand why? Why me? Why pick me up for a couple of hook-ups and then disappear?”

Kimi shrugged. “I don’t do people.”

“No shit.” Seb grumbled, folding up on himself. He was pissed off, and he still couldn’t go home. He certainly didn’t want to go back to the library. He just wanted to be in bed, pretending that this wasn’t actually happening. “Thanks for letting me stay here, I’ll be out of your hair soon.”

“I don’t want you to go.” Kimi said quietly. “If you don’t want to.”

Seb frowned a little, looking over at Kimi. “I thought you didn’t do people.”

“I don’t. But I want to do you.”

Seb snorted. “That sounds way worse.”

Kimi gave a small huff of laughter. “Well, in both ways.” He looked over Seb appreciatively. “I’m open.”

Seb blinked, and then jumped over the sofa. He grabbed Kimi’s face, kissing him hungrily, desperate. Kimi hummed, pulling Seb against him, walking them towards his bedroom. “So eager.” Kimi murmured, nipping at Seb’s lip. “Did you miss me?”

“Not at all.” Seb grinned, kicking off his pyjama pants and pulling his shirt off. “I think you have too many clothes on.”

Kimi nodded, following Seb’s lead, watching Seb lie down on the bed. “You look obscene.”

“Look in a mirror.” Seb replied, dragging Kimi down. “Now fuck me.”

“My pleasure.” Kimi smirked, leaning over and grabbing a condom from the bedside table. Seb hissed as Kimi slid a finger into him, slowly. Kimi kissed him lazily, working him just enough to slide a second finger in. Seb might not have remembered much from that first night, but he hadn’t forgotten how good Kimi was with his hands. His nerves were already running on electricity, another spark jolting when Kimi curled his fingers just so. “You feel so good.”

“More.” Seb panted, gripping the bedsheets. “More.”

Kimi grinned, sliding in a third finger, and it was almost too much. Seb started to push back a little, but Kimi just held onto his wrist, shaking his head.

“Not yet.” He said, sliding his fingers out. “You’re not to come until I tell you to.” He whispered, lining himself up. Seb nodded, throwing his head back with a whine when Kimi pushed in.

“Fuck, Kimi, fuck, move it… ”

Kimi was holding onto his waist, hard enough to bruise, but Seb didn’t care. He wanted to move, he wanted to roll his hips, but Kimi was holding him in place, caging him in. He held onto the bedsheets, desperate to hold something. Kimi seemed to have figured out the perfect angle, and Seb was shaking, trying to hold on. “I need, I need to…”

“Not yet.” Kimi breathed, releasing one hand from Seb’s waist. “Not yet.”

Kimi wrapped a hand around Seb’s dick, grinning when Seb whimpered. “Does that feel good.”

“So good, please…” Seb trailed off. His legs were trembling where they were wrapped around Kimi’s waist, he was so close…

“Come for me.” Kimi commanded, and it was all Seb needed. His vision went black, and when he came down from his orgasm, Kimi was shaking, hips stuttering. They stayed like that in silence for a few seconds, until Seb started to laugh, a little hysterical.

“You’re easily the best lay I’ve ever had.” Seb giggled, laughing harder when he saw Kimi’s incredulous face. “Fuck, I needed that.”

“The sex?”

“The sex. Or more specifically, the sex with you.” Seb admitted. He winced when Kimi pulled out, smiling when he caught the soft look on Kimi’s face. “I might take advantage of your bed.”

“Less distractions here?”

“Oh, definitely more.” Seb chuckled, getting up to clean himself off. “But worth it.”

                                                         ~*~

“So not a serial killer?” Charles asked, squinting a little. Seb laughed, happily accepting the coffee that Dan passed him.

“Not a serial killer. Possibly a vampire though.” He joked. “Tends to hang around places at night.”

“That’s not alarming.” Jenson muttered, grinning when he caught Seb’s look. “I’m happy for you. And jealous, you can enjoy an entire apartment.”

“Well, thank you to all of you for having so much sex I actually ran out of here.” Seb said, giving a little groan of pleasure when he took a sip of the coffee. “But fuck, I’m never leaving, and it is because of your coffee.”

Dan grinned, looking pleased. “And my skills strike again!” He cheered, giving a quick bow. “I thank you, I thank you.”

Seb laughed, listening to his housemates chatter amongst themselves. He’d missed this, but they’d all missed this. But he wasn’t going to disappear, to make them worry and abandon them. He loved Kimi’s place (more the bed than anything), but they were going to take it slow. By Kimi’s own admission, he wasn’t a people person, and having someone hanging around all the time felt like too much. And he didn’t want to give up this, sitting down and joking around, chatting about the most stupid things. They were young, and in love, and maybe it would last. Maybe it wouldn’t. There was no need to worry about the future yet, it’d come for them. But maybe they could enjoy the present. And maybe a bit more of Dan’s coffee.

                                                              ~*~

#sebastian vettel #kimi raikkonen #Jenson Button #charles leclerc #daniel ricciardo #pierre gasly #nico rosberg #jean-eric vergne #uni students au

[revisionaryhistory]

Three Days ~ 58

~*~Sebastian~*~

The video call with Emma's family had been good until the last sentence. I wasn't sure if Andrea was legitimately saying she hoped we'd be together or questioning if we would. From the look on Emma's face, she was going with option two. Now I was slightly suspicious Eli's dislike for them wasn't unfounded.

It wasn't late when Emma called. I put my script on the table and stretched out on the couch before connecting the call. I stopped before a word left my mouth.

Emma said, "Hey."

"This is not the same happy face I saw less than two hours ago." She looked exhausted. While her puffy red eyes could be from the pool, I doubted it was chlorine. She'd been crying. A knot formed in my stomach. I spoke quietly, "What's going on, baby?"

What followed was a strange story of her parents ignoring her to talk to Amy then telling Emma she should pretend her life sucks so her sister won't do drugs. Oversimplified, but accurate.

Dammit, Eli was right.

Emma went back and forth between angry and sad. I honestly don’t know which was worse, but I didn't like either of them. A wave of protectiveness washed over me and I wanted to jump on a plane to go get her. She didn't need saving now any more than she did in the bar after the volleyball tournament. The difference was either I was there just in case she needed me at the bar or possibly my feelings for her were stronger now. Or both.

At the end of the story, she said, "It's not always this bad. Most of the time it's fine, besides the walking on eggshells. I didn't say anything because I try to be optimistic. If I come down here thinking the worst, I’m reading into everything and paranoid about everything I say. It only makes things worse. I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad."

I double blinked, "Mad? I’m not mad at you. I’m pissed as hell at them. Your best friend kind of hates them. Your sister's a heroin addict and your parents signed over custody of you to a rock star who lived on the other side of the country. I never thought this was a vacation. You said I didn't need to worry, but I did anyway. I am going to need Eli's phone number so I can apologize for thinking he was an ass about your parents."

I felt better when she smiled, "He'll enjoy that and never let you forget."

"Never letting you forget stupid shit is the basis of most male friendships." I switched back to serious for a second, "Do you wanna leave? Say the word and I'll book the flight and talk to you until the Uber gets there. Meet you at the airport here and we'll lock ourselves in my apartment until we have to leave Sunday. Hell, you can just stay here and hideout. Maybe rearrange some more of my drawers."

"As wonderful as it sounds, no. Not tonight anyway. Amy and I will have a good time tomorrow. I'd feel bad running off. Sunday there will be family buffers. Monday, I don't know. Mom will be doing exams Tuesday while I'm with the girls." She shook her head, "I already severely limit my time here."

"Em, it's ok to not want to be around people who make you feel bad. Even if they're family. It's shitty, but it's your choice."

"Visit when my guilt about not visiting outweighs the potential bad time when I visit."

"I don't recommend guilt." I looked at her thinking what a shit situation this was.

"I don't want to fight to just be myself. Shouldn't be this difficult. I can understand them wanting to protect Amy, but I feel like they don't want to hear about me."

I couldn't fix this as much as I wanted to. "Last night when you knew I'd been upset did you feel incredibly helpless? Even though talking to me while I could see you was enough."

"Yep." She yawned. "I was out by the lake. I came back where it was light and we could see each other. We have good phone calls."

I agreed. Phone calls, even video calls, can feel distant or impersonal. Not for us. I'm used to keeping friendships going over the phone. If I couldn't have real conversations on the phone, I wouldn't be sane. "You’re tired."

"I don't want to hang up."

"Not going to. What was your favorite bedtime story when you were little?"

She looked at me like I was a little crazy. Not inaccurate. "Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree."

"I want you to go upstairs and get into bed. While you’re doing that, I’m going to find Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree. Then I'm going to read to you until you fall asleep."

“You’re going to read me a bedtime story?”

I most definitely was. I nodded with a smile.

“Best boyfriend ever.”

“Trying.” I could tell she was getting up. “I’m going to be quiet so you can sneak in.”

“My parents are awake in the family room. I have to walk through.”

“Just pretend you're sneaking me to your bedroom after a date. Put me in your pocket.”

She laughed and then the screen went dark. I could hear muffled voices. “I’m going to bed.”

“Amy said to be ready to leave at ten.”

“Sounds good. Night.”

“Sleep well. We love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Hmmm. Her voice didn’t hold the warmth those words should have. Not the way I’d want to hear them.

Less than a minute later I was out of her pocket. “I need the bathroom. I’m going to let you hang out in bed.”  She was quiet, but I could see she was concentrating on something. “Enjoy.”

Emma dropped the phone on the bed and I was staring at the ceiling when my text notification went off. Oh . . . the naked on a pool float picture. Peachless. Also, bikini bottomless. I was still smiling when the real girl came back on camera. “Nice ass.”

She crawled under the covers and propped her phone against the pillow next to her. “Remarkably self-conscious.”

“Then why’d you send it?” From the drinking game, I knew she’d sent nudes to someone before.

“Wasn’t self-conscious until after I sent. At the time it was fun and flirty. I knew you’d like it. After I hit send I thought I should make sure.”

“No, you were right I like it. A lot. Want a picture of my ass?”

“Your naked is ass is online and on film.”

“Bonus for you! Everything will be soon enough.” I still wasn’t sure how I felt about that.

“Really? Full frontal?”

“Not sure how full, but frontal. The movie I shot in Greece. Talk about self-conscious.”

“I tell you what. When your full-frontal comes out, I’ll send you full-frontal. We’ll be even.”

“Now I’m looking forward to the release.”  A dirty smile formed on my face, “Do I get to take it?”

“I don’t know who else would.”

I scrunched up my face because that hurt in all the good ways. I’m supposed to be reading a bedtime story not getting a hard-on. Guess where gonna see if I can do both at the same time. “Time for sleep.”

She smiled and tucked her hands under her pillow. I like seeing her relaxed like this even better than the naked pool picture. “You look so pretty curled up.”

“Did you remember to turn on the screenshot function?”

“I did.” I took one right now. “I’ll go sleep to that.”  

Winnie-the-Pooh sat down at the foot of the tree, put his head between his paws and began to think. First of all he said to himself: “That buzzing-noise means something. You don’t get a buzzing-noise like that, just buzzing and buzzing, without its meaning something. If there’s a buzzing-noise, somebody’s making a buzzing-noise, and the only reason for making a buzzing-noise that I know of is because you’re a bee.”

Then he thought another long time, and said: “And the only reason for being a bee that I know of is making honey.”

And then he got up, and said: “And the only reason for making honey is so as I can eat it.” So he began to climb the tree.

I kept reading until I was sure she was asleep. Instead of hanging up, I hit mute and put my phone on the arm of the chair where I could see her while I worked. I kept watch until she changed positions and knocked the phone onto the screen.

First thing in the morning, before heading to the gym, I sent her one of the pictures I took of her sleeping.

Sebastian ~ Hope your day is as peaceful as you look here.

Emma ~ Thank you. For everything. Listening, talking, bedtime story.

Sebastian ~ Confession. Didn't know Pooh before last night.

Emma ~ We can watch next time we're together.

Sebastian ~ Cuddled up watching Winnie the Pooh sounds good. Have fun today.

Emma ~ Have fun with the guys tonight.

 The next time I checked my phone, after working out, I had half a dozen text messages. All from Evans.

Chris ~ Yo!

Chris ~ Wake up

Chris ~ Lazy fucker

Chris ~ Are you home?

Chris ~ I’m in NYC

Chris ~ Let me know

Sebastian ~ Ass. I was at the gym. Chace is in town too. Meeting for drinks about five. Dinner. More drinks. You should come. I'd love to see you.

Chris ~ Sounds great. Tell me where.

 I sent him the address and was more excited about my night. Will, Chace, and now Chris were doing before dinner drinks then we'd meet up with the others. I'd made a ton of progress with the new role. After my shower I made some more notes, alternating with checking Instagram when I got a notification Emma had posted. A group walking down a dock pulling a couple of coolers was labeled, "Load in." A shot all of them on the boat. Emma was wearing the same bikini from yesterday with a pair of cutoffs. A couple of hours later she posted multiple pictures of them tubing, people sitting around laughing, others in the water, and a couple of them laying out on the deck. None of those had my girl. The next batch did. Same sort of pictures, but with her in.

This was much better than last night. She looked like she was having fun. The last one before I headed to meet the guys was her, Amy, and who I assume was Amy's boyfriend. He was in the middle. Emma's caption read, "Someone is missing."

I commented, "Miss you too."

I ran into Chace right outside the bar. We hugged and gave each other shit about our matching beards. We kept up the teasing and laughing all the way to the table. Will and Chris were already seated and had ordered beers. Chris downed half his beer in one drink, "Seb, man, you stood me up. I mean, I get helping your parents move."

Will laughed. Chace cocked his head to the side and smiled. Chris looked at them before turning his attention back to me, "What have you done?"

I put my beer down slowly. "Yeah, about that. I may have left out a bit. I was helping my parents move, but that's not why I stayed."

Chris put his hand on my shoulder, "You met a girl."

"I met a girl. We'd had a great first date and I wasn't ready to leave. I wanted to get to know her better."

Chris looked up like he was thinking, "I'm good with that." His eyes came back, "Still seeing her?"

I couldn't have stopped my smile if I'd tried. "Yeah. Emma."

Chris smiled, "Nice."

Chace looked at Will, "You knew this and didn't bust him in our group chat?"

Will shrugged, "Trust me, it's more fun this way." He shifted his eyes to me for a second before looking back to Chace with a smirked, "You've met her."

Chace pointed to himself, "I’ve met her?"

Will continued, "At Kirk's wedding she was with the singer from Boone's band and his wife."

I watched him search his memory, "Didn't I hit on her?"

"Why did you say that out loud?

Chace snickered, "To see him make that face."

Not sure what face I was making, but I changed it.

"I thought they were in a throuple."

I rolled my eyes, "Not a throuple."

"How is that even a word?" Chris screwed up his face.

Will handed Chace his phone, "This is her Instagram Emma_plays_90"

Unless Emma had updated the first was another throuple.

"Sister?"

"Twin."

Both smirked, "Nice."

Chace asked, "Which is yours?"

"Polka dot bikini."

They scrolled back in her timeline, turning the phone toward me when they got to the peach one.

Chris raised one eyebrow, "Please, tell me you have the uncensored version."

I nodded. Smiling again.

Chace handed Will his phone back, "You have better on your phone. Hand it over."

I knew this would happen and had left the naked one in my texts. I had to stand up to dig my phone out of my pocket. I had it unlocked and the folder full of her open when I got a text.

Emma ~ Tell Chris hi and nice to meet him.

I looked up. Chris was on his phone. "What did you do?"

Chris did a shit job of pretending to look innocent. "Does Instagram notify someone if you follow them?"

"If their account is set to private and they have to approve you, yes, it does." Another text.

Emma ~ And Chace...

I glared at him. He shrugged, "0oops."

"Now she knows we're talking about her." No idea why I said that. Of course, she knows we're talking about her.

Will looked exasperated, "She already knew."

Chace chuckled, "She DM’d me. Hope your pick-up lines have improved." He sat there saying each word as he replied, "I'd like to say they have, but probably not."

Will smacked the back of Chace's head, "Stop it. You know how he gets."

One of the side effects of insecurity is jealousy. I get jealous. And in an all-time dick move I don't like it when girlfriends get jealous. I think that falls under the topic of commitment issues. I shook my head at Will, "Not jealous. It's this combination of annoyed that I could have met her a year ago and relief I didn't because things would have gone very differently. I was not ready for Emma a year ago."

"How'd you get ready?"

One of the things Chris and I have in common is relationship and commitment issues. I had no trouble answering, "Years of therapy finally came together. I managed to step outside my walls and she ... she has this way of working around my anxiety. Makes it ok."

I handed over my phone, scrolled back to the beginning with the fish.

Chace winked at Chris, "Told ya the good ones were on his phone."

They scrolled through, stopping to look at each other before turning the phone around to me. It was on the deck at her place. She was sitting at the table, her leg pulled up with her foot on the seat, smiling at me. She'd looked beautiful in the fading light. The smile, the look on her face, still made my heart skip a beat. Any man would love to have a woman look at him the way she was looking at me. That was day four. It’s even better now.

Chris turned the phone back toward them, "You should have led with you'd blown me off because you met a beautiful woman who looks at you like you hung the fucking moon."

I shook my head, "I met a very kind and amazing woman who just happens to be beautiful."

Chace asked, "How'd you meet?"

"She thought I was a drug addict getting snacks before checking into the rehab place up the road. She

helped me find chocolate chips for mom to make fudge."

Chris looked surprised then smiled, "That's a good story."

"Nice, but makes questionable choices." Chris grabbed Chace’s hand to turn the phone back around.

Chace kept scrolling, "This hers? She have a kid?"

Not sure why the pictures are out of order. "No, one of her students. She teaches first grade."

Chris started laughing, his hand went to his chest, "This is perfect. I couldn't do this better."

I was lost, "What are you talking about?"

Chris waved his hand around, "Issues aside and knowing you're not always the good guy in the relationship. The Seb I know," He pointed to Chace and Will, “we know, is kind, sensitive, and has a big ole soft heart. Every time you date someone, I get scared. Legit terrified. I’m afraid every girl is going to break you, change you, and you won’t be sweet Seb anymore. When I think of a teacher, especially a first-grade teacher, I think patient, kind, empathetic, flexible but firm. If I was setting you up on a blind date, I'd look for those qualities. This could be perfect."

"Emma is all those things. And accepting. I had a panic attack the other night. She didn't bitch about me not waking her, or ask a million questions, she just asked what I needed to be ok. I needed a run. I came back and she was upside down on my couch and had switched my sock and underwear drawers. She took none of it on, just took care of me."

"Refreshing," Chris said and the others agreed.

"I took care of her after she got to her parents."

Will winced, "Eli right to hate them?"

My eyes went wide, "They ignored her to talk about Amy's boyfriend, and told her to pretend her life sucks so Amy won't do drugs and relapse."

Will grimaced, "Yeah, Eli is right."

I filled in the holes for Chace and Chris.

Chace frowned, "You’re supposed to go to rehab for cocaine?"

Chris put his hand over his mouth and pretended to look surprised, "Oops."

Chace again, "I picture a first-grade teacher as sweet and innocent. No cursing, drinking, and kinda shy with sex."

I lifted an eyebrow. The same side of my mouth curving up. "I get that, but no." I pulled my eyebrows down, pursed my lips, and shook my head. "I do like Monday mornings when she comes down looking like a first-grade teacher."

Chace leaned forward, "Are you in love with her?" He started to smile.

I hesitated and Will spoke up, "If you say anything besides yes you're a worse liar than you are an actor."

"That's harsh." I rubbed my hand over my beard. "Falling in love, yes. Haven't quite been pushed

over the edge."

"How long have you known her?" From Chace.

"Three weeks."

Chris was shaking his head," You don't need months to know what's right for you. Don't overthink it. If she's ticking all your boxes, your heart flutters when you see here, and her smile takes your breath away, it's long enough. Don't waste a second. Falling in love is the best feeling in the world, just fucking enjoy.”

Chace held his hand out, palm up, waving from Chris to me. "For the record, I wasn't going to give you shit. I was just curious."

The conversation changed to what had been going on with them. Chace was doing some anti-superhero Amazon series. Chris was signed on for an Amazon series too. Apparently, the future is Amazon. The beers kept coming and we were lit when Chris asked our servers to take a picture. He texted it to the three of us and we posted it to Instagram at the same time. Complete with a countdown. Because drunk boys.

We wove our way the block to the restaurant. Our group more than doubled in size. Dinner sobered us up. It was a good time. We were loud for no other reason than talking across a long table. Ok, we were a little loud anyway. Next was another bar. We got even louder there. The value of a night out with the guys should never be underrated. Being idiots and taking the piss out of each other was good for the soul, and bad for the liver. We closed the bar down, loading into cabs in groups heading in the same direction.

I barely remember getting home. The next morning, I woke up with a raging headache. First order of the day was Advil and a bottle of water. Second was checking in on Emma. After the bar, the first one, I hadn't checked my phone again. She knew how to reach me if she needed me. I'd figured she was having fun like I was. From the pictures and videos on Instagram plus the ones she'd texted me, I was right. They’d gone back to her parents after the boat and had a pool party.

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