James: Yo what should I take for a Patronus
Sirius: You don’t choose your Patronus, it chooses you.
James: Which one does Lily have?
Remus: I think she has a doe.
James: Hmm, well a lion chases the doe…
Remus: …too eat it.
Sirius: Well you could try to make a stag..
James: No, I’ll ask Lily what would she want
James: Hey Evans, what animal do you think I can be?
Lily: A pig.
Peter: She didn’t even hesitate
bianca di angelo 🤝 sirius black
coming out of somewhere you were forced to go after a long time and finding happiness ( in the hunters of artemis and harry potter respectively ) only to die in the next few months
The Noble and Most Ancient House of Memes
FRIENDS EDITION PART 2
Bellatrix: I’m dating Rodolphus because he has a great personality. Not because he has money
Sirius, Andromeda and Regulus:
Bellatrix: I will get the trifle!
Sirius getting snacks at 2am
Rabastan: [to Andromeda] We are going to have so many beautiful children
Sirius when he finds out Andromeda left and was burned off the family tree
Andromeda to Bellatrix and Narcissa
Narcissa: I would like fillet mignon for dinner
Regulus: I will take a fine grilled steak
At Grimmauld place
Harry: I want to fight Voldemort by myself
Molly: you cant be serious
Molly: *realizes what she just said*
Sirius: *runs downstairs towards the kitchen*
Sirius: *reaches the kitchen*
Sirius: he can’t
Sirius: I am Sirius
Sirius: how are you?
Remus: dead inside
James: OK YOU BETTER STOP BEING THE DEPRESSED FRIEND™ OR I’LL KICK YOU OUT OF MY HOUSE
Requested by an anon, based on my prompt list!
#25: “You met me yesterday.” “And I would die for you, next question.”
First year Remus Lupin was so nervous about his first day at Hogwarts that he ate his entire stash of chocolate – a whole two months’ worth – within a few hours of boarding the train at Kings Cross. All the sugar made his stomach hurt, not like he already didn’t feel like throwing up once he left his mother standing alone on the platform, and he felt more than a little queasy looking up at the grand Hogwarts castle as the newest students paddled their canoes across the lake. His only comfort was the boy sitting behind him – the worst paddler Remus had ever seen – who had refused to shut up from the moment he bounded into the train compartment Remus had claimed for his own.
Sirius Black didn’t quite grasp how to row the boat without splashing water all over, so by the time they reached shore, both boys were damp and smelled faintly of murky pond. It didn’t deter Sirius one bit from commenting on quite literally everything he saw.
“Did you see how tall those trees were? I wonder how we get into the Forbidden Forest. Do you think it’s really forbidden? Wow, look at that castle. I bet there’s a lot of secret passageways we could find. Do you think we’ll be in the same House? We better be. I’m going to be in Gryffindor, definitely. You have a little chocolate on your cheek. Here, I’ll get it. What’s your favorite kind? I like dark. Or those peanut butter chocolate things shaped like Old Saint Nick. Ooh, look, we’re going in. Good luck! The Sorting Hat will put us together, just watch.”
So since tumblr doesn’t like links, I am just going to do this again: make a post announcing a new chapter then reblog the post with the links, so check the notes for the reblog with the links to the fanfic!
Shifting Lines is a long haul fanfiction (first book is 94 chapters, 324k words) chronicling the life of Remus Lupin (eventually with Wolfstar).
We are currently in Book Two (Remus’s second year)
Want some LGBT+ filled Marauder fanfiction written by an LGBT+ author? Shifting Lines will (eventually) be the story for you! There isn’t much yet but there will be once they started growing older and realizing things. Not everyone will be, but there will be rep. Since it is a very long haul story feel free to message me with any questions :)
Also I tag all of these posts as Tobi’s Fanfic so if you want to block that feel free ^^
It was a late cold November night. Most of the students were already asleep. The common room was filled with 8 students, Remus was sprawled on the floor near the fireplace next to Lily, discussing some muggle book they both had recently read. Peter and Mary were engrossed in a very bad chess game since they both really suck at it. Sirius was playing arm wrestling with Marlene. James was in a heated argument with Dorcas about Quidditch teams. The most significant aspect about this night was the bottles of Fire whisky being passed around, it was sufficient to say they were all positively tipsy.
“You know what, Dorcas? Fine! You’re right. Sure, we suck!” James said, rather loudly. “Oi, Jamie, enough about that. Both teams are good.” Sirius said, during another losing match to Marlene. His arm hit the table and Marlene started celebrating, flexing her arms, “Yeah, look at that. I’ve won, again. You still weren’t ready?” she said, sticking out her tongue to an annoyed Sirius. “Oh, bugger off, blondie.” Sirius huffed.
“You got bested by a lady two times in a row, Padfoot. I’m starting to think you’re a beater because James is captain,” Peter chuckled, moving a knight forward on the chessboard then frowning, realizing it’s the wrong move.
“Shut it, ratboy, I’m a beater because I’m talented.”
“And because I’m the captain,” James added wiggling his eyebrows.
“Oh, is it ‘roast Sirius night’? Cause then count me in,” Remus rose up from the floor. Sirius was about to shoot him a comeback until his eyes landed on the boy in front of him. His cheeks were flushed, from the warmth or the alcohol or both, eyes shining bright hazel from the firelight, his hair so messy, curls falling on his eyes. Sirius’ brain wondered what it would be like to run his hands through it and- he felt pain, actual pain, on his thigh. He looked at the source and his eyes met Marlene’s all-knowing smirk. “Stop staring,” she mouthed to him.
“Yeah. Whatever, wolfy.” He stuttered a reply before going to occupy himself with anything other than Remus’ eyes. “Let’s play something,” He proposed partly because he was bored and mostly because he wanted to get away from Marlene’s gaze.
“What shall we play?” Dorcas asked. “Nothing tiring, we don’t want to wreak havoc,” Mary added.
“Truth or dare?” James suggested. “Very creative,” Lily said sitting up and grabbing a bottle of fire whiskey, finishing the rest of it. “You suggest then, Red,” Sirius said backing up his best friend.
“No, I’m alright. Sure, we play truth or dare, Black.”
“Good, now let’s just sit properly,” Remus said crawling near to the foot of the couch, almost sending Sirius to overdrive. It’s like the brunette boy is doing it on purpose. It’s been like that since they started their seventh year. The last two months had been filled with hand brushes, long stares, and longer hugs. Sirius didn’t want to read into it, maybe he was just imagining it, being lovesick and all. Then Remus does these things, like right then. What does it mean? Does Remus feel the same thing? Or is it just a normal thing he does? And if it’s normal, why does Sirius hyperventilates every time? So many questions were running through his mind. He came back to reality with a shove, “Earth to Sirius, we’re starting.” Dorcas said sitting now beside him.
They were all sitting in a circle legs crossed on the floor. It was Sirius then Dorcas and Marlene, James and Peter followed by Remus, Lily, and Mary. “Cool, I’ll begin,” announced Marlene. “So, peter, truth, or dare.”
Peter, taken by surprise she picked him, stammered dare. “Try to put your whole fist in your mouth” she shot him the dare. “damnit marly, go easy on the guy.” Dorcas chuckled beside her. “Rules are rules, do it, Petey,” Sirius said. Peter sighed, “This is ridiculous,” before following through with the dare. Unfortunately, he couldn’t do it, and the attempt earned him a laugh from the whole group, “amateur” Remus said, giggling, which of course Sirius heard. Again, eyes getting wide and brain going blank. This boy is going to be the death of me he thought.
“Yeah, whatever, guys. It’s my turn now. James, truth, or dare?” Peter said, partly exasperated, but still light-hearted.
“Well, dare, I say,” James answered, smugly. “Fine, you let Marlene draw on your face.” Peter said, “oh oh, and you’re not allowed to see it or wash it off till morning.” He added, evilly.
“Peter, did you have to pick her,” James started complaining, while Marlene got up to retrieve a quill from the nearest table. “No, backing off dares, pretty boy,” Lily said.
“Oh, you think I’m pretty, Lils?” He said with a smirk and a very corny wink.
“Not for long,” Marlene said, sitting down again and grabbing his face. “Oh Merlin,” he tried to squirm away. “Now, stay still, so I can focus on my art,” she started drawing first on both of his cheeks and then on his forehead, everyone was snickering around them. She lifted the quill off his face with a shit-eating grin. “There you go,” she said, proud of her work.
“What is it, guys? Is it bad? Oh my god, is it a penis?” James asked, looking at each and everyone for answers, except that everyone was doubling on the floor from laughter, “Don’t worry, you look positively stunning, Prongs.” Sirius replied from between laughs. “You’re really not going to say?” he asked the group.
“No cheating, you very pretty boy,” Lily said, face completely red.
“Sure then, this is getting real. Truth or dare, Siri?” he asked, trying to hide his annoyance.
“Oh, me… Well, to change it a little, I’m picking truth,” Sirius replied. His best mate raised an eyebrow, which looked amusing because it had a deer antler drawn above it, getting Sirius to snort and chuckle. “You think it’s funny? Good, here is the question.” James went silent for a second, “What are your kinks?” He asked, dragging every word. His question shifted the air in the group and everyone was now staring at Sirius, including Remus. He looked at him, curiously.
Sirius is not being phased by the actual question, but by Remus’ stare. He doesn’t know if it was the alcohol or the Gryffindor bravery, but he decided to throw caution out of the window and lock eyes with Remus, the boy he’s been possibly in love with since the fifth year. “My kink…” he started, ignoring everyone around him, he was sure Remus was giving him the same look, here goes nothing he thought. “My kink is werewolves with soft smiles and pretty eyes.” He said into the air, but still intensively watching Remus for a reaction. He prays he didn’t mess everything up when Remus’ mouth shapes into an O. He finally broke eye contact to find Dorcas and Mary high-fiving, Marlene talking about a bet, and James looking all smug.
“You know what, I think I’m going to sleep,” Lily said, faking a yawn and getting up. The girls got up after her. “yeah, we’re going to crash, good night, guys” Dorcas added, locking arms with Marlene.
As the girls walked away, James also got up, stumbling around a little, “Us too, c’mon, Wormy,” He gestured to peter. “But we were playing,” Peter complained. “Oh just move it, idiot.” James grabbed his arm and pulled him up.
“The room is all yours, boys,” James said with a wink and also walked away. Leaving Sirius and Remus alone, with a very long conversation ahead.
Blueberry Picking in the Summer at the Lupin’s
- Just imagine Sirius coming over in the summer going into fifth year instead if at James’ for once.
- This was actually because fourth year was when Sirius realised he had a MASSIVE crush on Remus.
- Remus being so happy that his parents let him come, he had never had anyone over before.
- Remus having four siblings. Two younger brothers (twins) called Will and Adam who are eight at the time, an older brother called Michael who was going into his finale year and an older sister called Maddie, who was twenty three.
- They all loved him immediately and Sirius had the biggest smile on his face from the start.
- But one day, Remus introduces Sirius to something his family (including lyall, we love him, hes nice and supportive here yes yes he is) always did in the summer. Pick blueberries from the fields by their cottage and make blueberry pies, muffins and a range of things.
- Sirius LOVES this idea and soon becomes one of the best bakers in the family
- They have bake-offs whenever they can and usually Sirius gets into the ‘family final’ and competes very aggressively with Maddie (she loves him) to which they both usually win because it turns into a food fight.
- The first night they went blueberry picking Sirius couldn’t help but stare at Remus, skin and eyes glowing in the August sunlight - his hair almost golden.
- He stared at the flecks of blueberry juice that littered his shirt and face and at that moment he knew, crap, he was in love with him.
- And that night, when the two are laying in Remus’ bed, maybe a little too close but “it’s okay mum, we’re best mates. it’s fine!” Sirius tells him.
- Remus is absolutely terrified because he loves Sirius too and he thinks hes dreaming.
- From then on, Sirius let’s Remus win the baking competitions, even if he was shit and Sirius had to help him stir.
- Besides, he got a few lucky kisses each time.
The Noble and Most Ancient House of Memes
AVPM Edition 2
Andromeda to Sirius when she gets tired of arguing with the family
Andromeda to Bellatrix
Andromeda and Sirius
Lucius seeing the Quidditch Cup for the first time
Sirius after Andromeda is burned off the family tree
Sirius talking about Rodolphus and Rabastan
Sirius when Andromeda asks him what’s wrong
“Remus, what were you doing?! It’s been like an hour, we were worried about you and Sirius! I actually thought you got in trouble” Lily cried when the boy came back to the sofa. Even though his turtle neck wouldn’t let his friends see the marks in his neck, he was still self conscious about them realising
who what he had done that night.
“I’m sorry, Lils. I lost the track of time… Well, are you going to finish the story you were telling?” He said trying to change the subject.
The girl looked at him. Then, she looked at Peter sleeping on the floor, next to them. Lastly, her eyes went back to Remus’. “What were you guys doing?” She asked.
“Oh- nothing, Sirius wanted me to help him with… Transformation’s homework” he lied.
“Of course! Because Sirius is horrible at transformation and he’s not at the top of the class for sure” She replied sarcastically. Remus knew she now knew. “What did you two do?” She insisted, but the boy stayed in silence. “It’s ok if you don’t wanna talk, but I’m curious-”
“He kissed me” Moony mumbled.
Lily raised her eyebrows and looked at her friend “nice”.
“It was- but please don’t tell anyone!” He cried.
“why would I tell anyone?!” There was a pause. “Ok, don’t answer that. But let me tell you I won the bet. I can borrow you some money for buying chocolate if you want. I mean, after all, you are the reason I’ll get the money” she said happily.
“You won a bet? What bet?!”.
“The bet! James said you would kiss before midnight, but I guess Sirius took his time”.
“YOU KNEW IT??”
“Remus don’t be silly, I think you were the only one who didn’t know about Sirius’ crush on you”.
“HE HAS A CRUSH ON ME TOO?!”
“Mate, are you fucking kidding me?!”
The Noble and Most Ancient House of Memes
HP Films Edition
Sirius when someone mentions how close him and Remus are
Sirius: Andromeda help me get out of this house quick
Andromeda: I have the perfect idea
Sirius ten minutes later:
Sirius walking into a Lucius and Narcissa make out fest
Orion: Have fun without a beautiful home
Sirius finding out Andromeda was disowned
Sirius talking to Andromeda about her relationship with Ted
Walburga: Who made this awful mess?
Sirius and Andromeda tag teaming in a family argument
“Hi” the stranger said, “I’d like to order something… Special”.
Remus, who was just a normal barista trying to earn money in order to pay the rent, mumbled “order then, I’m here to do whatever you wan-” but he couldn’t finish the sentence because he looked up and met a tall man with beautiful eyes and long dark hair that was wearing a cool leather jacket and had an extraordinary jawline and- oh damnit he had a crush on a stranger again. But this crush was different, definitely. The man seemed to be unique.
“Whatever I want?” He interrupted his thoughts while smirking.
“I- I mean, whatever you want to drink” that might have sounded worse. The man laughed.
“Nevermind, can I order water with whipped cream?”.
What type of combination is that?! Remus thought to himself. “Sure, it’ll be ready in a minute, what’s your name?”
“Sirius” he answered.
“Oh, nice name”.
“Thank you… Might I ask what’s your name?” Sirius added.
“Remus. I’m Remus”.
There was a silence. Then the barista walked away in order to grab a glass and pour water in it. “Why would someone order water with whipped cream?” He asked out loud to himself.
“Well” Sirius started from the corner of the shop, “it was a dare”.
Remus was embarrassed. He didn’t expect the handsome stranger to listen. “What was the dare about?” He asked.
“Uh… My friend didn’t think I’d have the balls to talk to a pretty person I saw in the street”.
“Oh, so you lost the dare and this is the punishment? Asking for water with whipped cream?”
“No, Remus” the way his name sounded in the man’s voice made him shake a little, “I’m in the middle of the realisation of this stupid dare”.
“Do you really think you are going to win a girl’s heart by giving her water with wh-”
“You are the pretty person I was talking about” he confessed.
“Oh” that was all. He was dying. “Well, uh-”.
“Don’t worry, I know not everyone is gay nowadays…”
“What do you mean? What? No, I mean, yes. I am. Kind of. Not the point. You are pretty too!” Remus tried to say as the panic grew inside him.
“Oh, that’s great then…”
“Yeah… But did you really think you would get to my heart with a glass of water and whipped crea-”.
Sirius: It’s like my family and I are dead to each other
James: So that’s grim-mourn place for you then
Lily: oMg JaMeS nOw iS nOt tHe tIme!!!
The Noble and Most Ancient House of Memes
Bob’s Burgers Edition
Andromeda about Ted
Sirius preparing for dinner
Everyone: [talking trash]
Andromeda to Rabastan
Sirius directing Orion on where to put the family motto
I don’t think i have daddy issues…but I find Aaron Hotchner, Sirius Black, and Tony Stark incredibly attractive..so…maybe im wrong
Marauders as things me and my friends have said #7
Sirius: How can the night be so fucking pretty
Remus: Well it is like your hair so it makes sense
Sirius: THAT WAS SO FUCKING SMOOTH YOU SHAMELESS FLIRT
Sirius: [to James] The first rule of dealing with the cycle …
Sirius: You don’t ever mention the cycle