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#papa tony stark

I know a lot of people want Tony and Pepper to have a baby… I just always thought Tony would make an AI child.

OK hear me out…

I’m not talking Ultron. Obviously, he’s learned from his mistakes from Ultron - which is what he’d tell Pepper when he first comes to her with the idea. He’d upload all of his own knowledge (instead of giving their kid unlimited access to every single database known to man), and Pepper would make sure he told her everything he was uploading into the child’s database. The only extended knowledge would be languages, or something. And he’d program the child to be able to learn and absorb new knowledge, so it could “grow up” intellectually, he’d also program it to grow physically(cuz he’s Tony Stark, he can do that).

And then when it comes time to design the child’s appearance, he wants to create a toddler, but Pepper insists that a robot toddler would be too creepy, the kid should be chronologically…11 years old. And it should be a girl. With brown eyes and brown hair.

  Tony then whines that he always imagined that if they had a kid, it would look like Pepper. Pepper just shrugs and says “and I always imagined our kid would look like you.Besides, it’ll be easier for me to discipline her if she looks just like you.”

The only other person they tell is Rhodey, who thinks it’s inane, but if Pepper’s at least OK with it, then maybe it’ll be OK.

A few moths later, the Avengers all gather for a meeting at the compound. They all make a first stop at the common area/kitchen first, before the meeting, and are all surprised to see a young girl, with shoulder-length brown hair and brown eyes, sitting next to Tony (who’s eating a bowl of cereal) reading the newspaper.

Tony looks up and notices the rest of the team staring.

“Oh, hey guys,” he greets “…this is my daughter, Lucy.”

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Literally all I presently want to see in this life is Dad!Tony Stark.

I don’t care if he’s married. I don’t care who he’s romantically involved with at all.

I just want to see him breaking up brawls over who gets the TV remote, and/or grounding someone for being out past curfew, fighting with someone over whether or not they can have a dog, and forcing someone(s) to pose for the Stark family Christmas card (with Uncle Rhodey begrudgingly dressed as Rudolph,wearing reindeer antlers and a red nose).

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(stuck on the fridge in the Stark family kitchen)

Stark House Rules (EDITED…AGAIN!)

- Pizza Night is first-come, first-order. Peter- if there’s olives, pick them off. Vision- yes, everyone loves your culinary skills, but everyone also loves pizza, it is not meant as an insult, Ultron- you are confined to Veggie pizza until you learn not to compare sausage and bacon to “the human carnage I will one day leave in my wake”.

- Vision- don’t call Peter “Arachnoying”. Peter- Don’t call Ultron “Google Chrome”,“Mr. Robot” or “Fender - Face”. Ultron- Don’t call Vision “20-20″ or “Purple Pinhead”.

- Everybody has their own bathroom, everybody is expected to clean said bathroom on a weekly basis. Same goes for your bedrooms. Uncle Rhodey will be in charge of inspections, and he’s a military man, so you know there’ll be high expectations there.(and don’t just shove everything into your closets!)

- If you don’t want me to put a GPS chip on your cell phone, don’t drunk-dial me at 2 AM from a party asking me to pick up burritos for you and your friends.

- FAMILY GAME NIGHT IS SUSPENDED INDEFINITELY

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