#pardonthelitany

[shanastoryteller]

Something siat Hermione!! (I love her)

"Well, Miss Granger," McGonagall says, giving her record a cursory glance. "You have the grades to do anything, as you well know. What are your career goals?"

Hermione opens her mouth then closes it.

The career counseling sessions aren't a secret. She's known since she was eleven that this is a conversation she was going to have and she's had just as long to think of the answer, but just then her mind is blank.

She hates being unprepared.

McGonagall's expression softens. "You don't have to have an answer. A large portion of the reasoning behind these discussions is to focus in on what Newt level classes you'll be taking, but I assume you'll be taking all of them regardless of any discussion we have here today."

That's true. But. "Shouldn't I know what I want by now?"

"At the ripe and wise age of sixteen?" she asks dryly. "No, I don't think you should. Why don't you go a year without nearly dying and see if that resettles your priorities?"

Big ask.

Her face must show that, because McGonagall rolls her eyes, and Hermione can't keep from giggling.

#prompt answers #prompts are closed #asks #pardonthelitany #harry potter #siat

[utterlyhooked]

my favorite thing about the scene in the magistrate's is that, when they last parted in the ginkgo grove, he was like, when we see each other next, we'll be mere acquaintances... smh. buyi. babe.

(also fuck if zhou hejun didn't win me tf over when she chopped off that asshole's head—amazing. fav moment of tv this year)

@pardonthelitany Yes, amazing!!! Even when He Zhaojun told him, go on, be a ghost and see my father and brothers kill you again! The chopping off his head was *chefs kiss*! Even though the rational part of me was saying - it's not possible for her to get it done in one clean swoop. She doesn't have the strength in her arms to do so even if the blade is as sharp as it can possibly be. That’s why highly skilled executioners were hired for decapitation of the nobility. An unskilled one could take several swings before the head is cut off completely. But for cinematic purposes... *slow claps*

I think in the ginko grove, he was pretty much resigned that she will be someone elses wife. He was going to love and protect her for the rest of his life, just from afar... sad... but in the magistrates even though he said to Shaoshang that no matter what she decides, it will be correct....  he more or less knew that the wedding was not going to happen just as he said to He Zaojun while sheilding Shaoshang - "Lady Ancheng need not scare Miss Cheng like this. The Cheng and Lou families have already planned to withdraw from the marriage."

I also think that he just has this need... an impulse to just protect her no matter what. He can’t help it. An instinctive reaction to sheild and protect.

What I love about this scene is how he enveloped her and the reassurance of “I’m here.” A protective gesture, like a wall, a fortress that could withstand fire and flood for centuries! But the thing that really, really gets me and I can’t bloody get over it.... is the way he stares at her..... fecken hell that stare!!!!!!!

#月升沧海 #星汉灿烂 #Love Like The Galaxy #LLTG #Wu Lei #Leo Wu #Ling Buyi #General Ling #Shiyilang #Zhao Lusi #Cheng Shaoshang #He Zhaojun #decapitating Prince Xiao #wasn't obsessed before but I am now #I need to get over this drama #FFS I need to find something so I can get over this #I need sleep! #myedit

[isozyme]

So your Klein/Reinhardt/Rauschenberg post came up on my dash, and I have to ask... I was under the impression that Rauschenberg was closeted. Your anecdote about his conversation with de Kooning— was that exaggerated for comedic purposes, or was he out and maybe bi? I love the work he and johns created in their early days when they kept referencing one another.

exaggerated for effect! he wasn’t publicly out, as far as i can tell, although given that he had more than one relationship with dudes in their artistic circle it would be a bit weird if nobody had an inkling

#learned that cy twombly and rauschenberg had a fling while looking stuff up for this ask #so that's cool! #cy twombly is a fave #everybody should check out fifty days at illiam if they get a chance #it slaps #pardonthelitany

[bemusedlybespectacled]

I know literally no one else who watched BBC's Robin Hood. I stopped after that ridiculous scene in the desert that shattered my fucking heart and soul. I know it got another season though... How did it end?

OH YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW IT ENDED? LET ME TELL YOU HOW.

So after Marian dies for a bullshit reason and the showrunners quit, we have 1) an all-new set of writers, 2) no Robin/Marian/Guy love triangle angst, and 3) no Marian, Will or Djaq.

The first episode is the only episode that actually addresses anything in there, and Robin and Guy both get over their love of Marian in the space of that entire episode. 

All of a sudden Guy has a sister, Isabella (played by Lara Pulver, the same actress who played Irene Adler in Sherlock), who ends up replacing Vaisey as the new Sheriff of Nottingham (I know) and becomes this straw feminist matriarch who rules with an iron fist and just hates men for no reason (I know). Meanwhile, Friar Tuck joins the band, surpassed in uselessness only by Kate, the New Love Interest, who was so reviled by the fandom that there were literally fics parodying her uselessness.

After an entire season of bizarre plot points that went nowhere, the penultimate episode and two-part series finale has the following:

The reveal that Robin and Guy are half-brothers;

They have a third half-brother, Archer (they. named. him. Archer.);

Archer studied in Asia and is way smarter and way cooler than both of them, and also has ninja stars (fucking ninja stars);

Allan a-Dale is brutally killed just when he decides to become a good guy again;

Guy of Gisborne dies in Robin’s arms;

The castle is rigged to explode with black powder, killing Isabella and Vaisey;

Robin goes off into the forest and has a fucking dying dream that Marian is there to take him to Heaven, ignoring the fact that no one cared about Marian all fucking season;

Much is kidnapped by Prince John;

The remaining members of the band are Kate, Friar Tuck, Little John, and fucking Archer;

And yet, somehow they expected to actually get renewed for a fourth season. Are you fucking kidding me.

The only good thing about the third season is that at least Will, Djaq, and Marian were spared this monstrosity.

#personal #robin hood bbc #pardonthelitany #askbox

[rcmclachlan]

Whenever someone’s like, “YA lit ain’t shit,” I tell them about the scene where Ganymede is flayed and eaten alive by a god-killer while the main cast watches.

#and if you really want to take it to the next level then check out EVERWORLD #rc had a childhood #pardonthelitany #chronotempus

[my-nameless-bliss]

Lol, i had a moment today that i thought you’d appreciate. I was standing around at work thinking about how much I love Magnus Bane and how that started, and then I remembered the first time I ever read City of Bones and that fUCKING FALCON SCENE. i can clearly remember realizing that it was copied practically verbatim from one of CC’s harry potter fanfics. it's been almost ten years, and I had completely forgotten, but today I could not stop laughing. GAWD. fucking RIDICULOUS.

Oh my god, seriously??? I mean, I knew cc just barely shaved off the hp-specific stuff from her fics to make the tmi books, but I didn’t know there were entire scenes taken from it! I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, but it’s still so weird to hear it. It definitely wears on my soul whenever I think too hard about how much of my life I’ve devoted to something that started as a badly plagiarized hp fic. 🙃🙃🙃

#all the shit I write in aldnt #and it's like 'this is technically being written about Harry potter' #and I hate myself #lol why is cc like this?????????? #God she's ridiculous #I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT SCENE WAS IN HER FIC #but of course it was lbr #Nykeigh answers #pardonthelitany #anti cc

[wbtrashking]

In Japan, Yuuri had been stealing Viktor's shirts to wear to sleep ("they must have gotten lost in the laundry!") and he forgets about it until the first night he gets ready for bed in St. Petersburg. He decides to sleep shirtless because of it.

my brain is havin’ a rough time with fic craft atm, so for now, here’s a hc list/semi-fic! ♥♥ @pardonthelitany

-in general, yuuri’s sort of messy and disorganized, so he definitely forgets to do his laundry until he’s down to the last pair of undies

-conversely, victor’s closet is all hyper-organized, he’s got it down to shirt style, colors, functionality, etc.

-when yuuri gets too lazy he goes to the drawer for these shirts like. victor hardly wears them, except maybe to bed and he tends to think of them as his own instead

-(they hang off of his shoulders and they have really deep u-necks)

-and like, usually, yuuri’s doing this when victor’s gone because he likes the smell of the little air fresheners that victor stuffs in the drawers and closet

-so when victor sees him blearily answer the door in them, like. he just gets caught staring. the first shirts show off yuuri’s legs and he just likes watching yuuri move, gets so enamored in it that he knows he has to get smth more decent

-he winds up buying really soft t-shirts with designs of animals and trees and such, and yuuri can tell they’re too big for either of them but like? knowing that victor did this to have him walk around the apartment in an oversized shirt makes him feel like he’s on top of the world

-best moment, hands down - yuuri likes to bend down to pick things up (that don’t need to be picked up), and lean up for stuff in the cabinets to show victor that he’s not wearing anything underneath the shirt. 

-”well? aren’t you going to ask why i’m wearing your shirt?” victor dies. they romp around for hours.

i love them ♥

#pardonthelitany #victuuri #yoi #yurice #txt #hcs

[kazliin]

OH MAN. LOVE STORY. YOU CHOSE LOVE STORY. LOVE“LOVE MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU’RE SORRY”STORY. I’m setting aside the hockey thing (coincidence) and the terminal illness thing (because no one in this fic is going to die, pls, jfc), and just. VIKTOR. YOU HAVE TO APOLOGISE, OKAY. Either way, I love the version of the LS theme you found, and i cannot for the life of me find one half as good on spotify. I just...have so many fucking feels over Viktor using that song. And then, with that fallout...

(2/2) This was such a good chapter, jfc. Yuuri broke my goddamned heart like four times. The angst! The miscommunication! UGH

It was Passenger yes :D Funny story, the chapter was originally going to be called ‘The First Cut Is The Deepest (But The Rest Still Flipping Hurt)’ from the same song but then I realised it was waaaaay to spoilery so I just went for a vaguely foreboding title instead. 

As for Viktor FS, the song choice was based more on the lyrics to the original song than the film plot because I actually don’t like the film that much but the inclusion of it was actually a little private joke to myself because as you say, the famous line in that film is ‘love means never having to say you’re sorry’ and that is SUCH BULLSHIT. That line always really pissed me off because you don’t get to excuse yourself for hurting someone just because you love them and they love you. And throughout the course of the fic both Viktor and Yuuri have done (unintentionally) shitty things to each other and hurt each other and before they can start to build a healthy relationship they both need to apologize for that. So yeah, that was my own little in joke that literally only I would get because I’m a dork and I do that a lot in this fic!

#until my feet bleed and my heart aches #replies #pardonthelitany

[moosemum]

I'm just curious, because I loved your Yuuri on Ice full FS video so much, have you done or considered doing any of the other programs in the show?

I’ve thought about it, yes! It’s just unfortunate we don’t see anyone else’s programs as much as Yuuri’s, so it’d be difficult to piece it together. The only other that even comes close is Yuri’s Short Program, and even then we only see it three times. I could probably put it together, though. I’ll have to see.

That being said, I did also do Yuuri’s SP! It’s much more complete than his FS is, considering we see it five times, the most we see any program in the show!

#yuri on ice #yoi #yuuri katsuki #katsuki yuuri #pardonthelitany #[ask]

[mxrcusflint]

I love the falling snow effect you used in your recent Hermione edit (/post/157262851652/2k-make-me-choose-edits-a-real-life-horror-story)! How did you create that?

hi friend! so i basically used this tutorial except with a falling stars overlay (I can’t remember where I got it from, at this point, but if you search up stars overlay on YouTube you can find some rlly good ones!)

#pardonthelitany #replies

[shadehunters]

I was really hoping the confetti was like a thing tumblr actually did every night at midnight, and that I had actually just never been on bf at the precise time to witness it. but that is clearly not the case. tumblr turned 10 today. it celebrated. every other social media site forgot to show up/didn't send cards—so tumblr had to throw its own party. in characteristic tumblr style, no one knew what the fuck was going on. kinda feel bad for it. but also—happy to be home.

OH well that explains a lot

but lmao of course tumblr celebrates its bday without tellin anybody whats going on. I expected nothing less

#pardonthelitany

[shanastoryteller]

SIAT Hermione please! Or dealer’s choice! You’re the best!!

After his mother returns to the underworld, Zagreus says that he can’t survive on the surface for longer than a few minutes.

Zagreus lies.

He laughs off Than’s concern and Meg’s frowns and tries not to feel too terrible about keeping secrets from the people he loves.

He discovers something about himself on accident. He hadn’t even tried to make it far from the underworld’s entrance, had sat himself down on the cold ground and looked out on the ocean, feeling the weak sunlight on his face. He counts the birds that pass overhead until painful spasms wrack his body and he succumbs to his home pulling him back.

When he passes that place the next time he makes it past his father, it’s different.

The place where his body had died has changed. No snow covers it and dark green grass peeks through, darker than what he’d seen in his mother’s garden.

He steps on this spot and takes a startled breath, then another.

It doesn’t hurt to breathe.

The air of the mortal world always pricks at his lungs, but here it’s easy. It’s nothing. It feels like he’s back in the underworld again, as if death isn’t reaching for him.

He stand in that patch of dark green grass for a long time, far longer than he’s ever stood on the surface before. Nothing hurts. The styx doesn’t come from him.

He lies down on the cold snow and blood instantly floods his mouth. He dies choking.

The next time, the spot of dark green grass has grown bigger. There’s a slim stem protruding from the ground, a delicate little plant that he can’t name. He hadn’t thought about this. He hadn’t considered this.

He’s not just a son of Hades.

He’s Persephone’s child too.

On his next run through the underworld, he stops by Eurydice’s corner of Asphodal. This is something he wishes he could ask his mother, but he doesn’t want to raise anyone’s suspicions. She presses a bottle of porridge into his hands and he asks, “How did you make things grow? You’re a nymph, so that’s something you did, right?”

She startles, giving him a considering look, but thankfully doesn’t ask any questions. “Well, Prince, for the mortals it took a lot of work. But I just sort of – willed things to exist, and then they did. You just need some conviction.”

“Conviction,” he repeats, trying not to sound skeptical.

Eurydice’s lips quirk up in the corners. “I don’t think anything but poms can grow here. But if anyone could do it, it would be you. You’re stubborn enough to do anything, I think.”

It hadn’t even occurred to him to try growing anything here.

In Elysium, he comes upon Patroclus’s clearing, and he should accept his blessing and move on, but instead he asks, “Can I, um, try something? Here? It might change the clearing a bit.”

Patroclus raises an eyebrow, but just says, “Do as you like, stranger.”

He takes the pom he’d saved from several rooms back and splits it open. The seeds spill out onto the ground and he digs a hole with his heel before pushing them inside. Elysium doesn’t have plants or dirt, exactly, not like the surface does, but it’ll have to do.

He sits, and he focuses, and nothing happens.

“This is your father’s land, stranger,” Patroclus says. “Nothing happens here that he doesn’t will.”

That’s just not true. Zagreus has proven that, time and again, that he can break past the rules his father has made for his domain.

He’ll just have to make it his own instead.

Zagreus has gotten so good at fighting his way through the shades and wretches that he’s barely even bleeding. That won’t do. He cuts open his arm, blood gushing down onto the ground, hitting the pom seeds and soaking them through.

He knows what trees look like now. He imagines the seeds blossoming and growing, imagines large branches being pulled down with the weight of fat fruit.

When he opens his eyes, there are a half dozen pom trees in front of him, the fruit hanging thick and ripe.

He looks to Patroclus, who has a proper grin on his face for the first time since he’s met him. “Well, would you look at that.”

“Do you know anything about farming?” he asks. “Can you – are there other things, that can be grown?”

“Not here, I don’t think,” he mutters, plucking one of the poms. “Then again, maybe it can, if it’s you.”

Zagreus cultivates gardens below and above and hopes that no one notices. He pours his blood into the surface, growing his gardens bit by bit, and everywhere he bleeds he can live. He could live in a cottage right here like his mother if he wanted. But down with Patroclus he’s growing bright red grapes and orange olives and other things that shouldn’t exist but do, and soon he even figures out how to grow those on the surface too.

His garden has spread, covering the mountaintop, and he’s contemplating dying in a path that could get him closer to the city. He gets pass his father and enters his garden to see a teenager filling a basket with his silver apples. “Stealing from my garden?”

She turns to see him and throws herself at his feet, pressing her forehead into the ground. He’s so startled that all he can do is gape. “Begging your pardon, my lord,” she says, voice trembling. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”

Zagreus has never been in this situation before. “Er, it’s alright, really. Please get up.”

She tentatively lifts her head, revealing her tear stained face.

Now he feels properly awful. “Look, you can take them, alright? But I don’t know if – it’s not a mortal food, you understand. It might kill you.”

He doesn’t know what will happens to mortals who eat his fruits. He doesn’t know what happens when he eats them, even. It never occurred to him to try. It was all about the act of creation rather than consumption.

“We’re dead anyway,” she says, still bowing to him. “We can’t grow anything in the cold and the animals can’t forage. Thank you, my lord. If we die, then we don’t die hungry.”

Well, that’s just depressing. He’s seen the endless winter for himself. He knows people are dying, obviously, but it hadn’t occurred to him to connect those two things. The surface is a strange place. “You’ll live,” he says, hating her fear. He places his hand on the basket of silver apples and repeats, “You’ll live.”

For the first time in his life, he’s exhausted. The apples glow before subsiding and he belated realize that he’s just given his blessing.

He didn’t think he could do that.

#prompt answers #prompts are closed #asks #pardonthelitany #hades game #ty for the dealers choice i have a whole outline for this #and it won't get out of my head #the hades game ending is a tragedy #let zagreus explore!!

[utterlyhooked]

Something just occurred to me because I’m working on lltg fic. You’ve read the book. What’s third prince’s name?

@pardonthelitany If memory serves me well (I would not rely on it, honestly! :D), his name was probably mentioned once and I think it was not the official name, like Ling Buyi's Zisheng. I cannot remember it but I will let you know if/when I find it.

[bemusedlybespectacled]

i always want to respond to these with 1-100??? but. how about 6, 18, and 24?

6. What's your lucky number?

I don’t really have one? Or if I have, I’ve never noticed.

18. Do you want children?

Tough question. I really love children, especially babies and toddlers. On the other hand, I have a feeling I’d be a terrible parent. I’m a pushover, I’m a worrywart (and I have overprotective parents, I’d hate to inflict that on a kid), and I care a lot about my career. And I’m not saying that you can’t have a career and kids, but I don’t like the idea of sending a baby to daycare and law is an insanely competitive (and yes, sexist) field.

24. Baths or showers?

I honestly can’t remember the last time I took a bath. I think the only time I would is if I had a bath bomb and wanted to try it, since I’ve never used one before.

#personal #pardonthelitany #askbox

[wangxianficrecs]

Hi! I appreciate what you're doing for the fandom and I really hope you can help find a missing fic- WWX is the moon god and wangxian met when LZ was young and he tended to WWX's injury cause he fell off the jingshi roof. They keep meeting every new moon as LZ grows and falls in love with WWX but content not telling him. Its not quite unrequited bc WWX being a deity cant love. It was a WIP but it ended where WWX gave up his divinity, put it in a lotus tassle(?) and asked LZ to keep it.Thank you❤

FOUND!  by @akinohikari AND @catholicjigglypuff who point us to  Lying on the Edge of a Star by Suspicious_Popsicle

***

@violet-fangirl15 (2) says:  Hi, can u help me find a fic? It's wangxian but in a modern setting where lan zhan runs a mafia with his brother and wei wuxian and Jiang Cheng are assasins. Somehow wei wuxian meets lan zhan and they get together, but then someone has a hit on lan zhan and wuxian takes it instead. I think its a series. Lotus pier is destroyed, somehow jin Ling is reincarnated and serves with lan shizhui as helpers? To the lan zhan. That's all I remember. Can u help me find it?

???  Could you be thinking of You & Me Baby, We'll Eclipse The Sun by  by 2501987?  I haven’t had the courage to dive into that one yet...

***

Anon (3) says:  Hello, I am looking for a Wangxian fic that I read a little while ago but cannot find again. Its a smut, usually LWJ doms for WWX but LWJ really wants to relinquish control but doesn't want to tell WWX, WWX realises on a night hunt and then thats what the fic is about. I'm sorry this is not a fantastic description, if you don't know it please feel free to ignore

FOUND!  @mondengel says Fledgling by grimsgay.

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@pardonthelitany (4) says:  I’m looking for a wangxian fic where wwx gets a replacement golden core. Specifically, I think wen qing builds it for him out of other people’s spiritual energy (like even lan zixuan and madam yu donate)? I love stories where his golden core is recovered in some way! Thank you so much for everything you do! I always look forward to your recs!! ♥️♥️

Ah!  I’ve read and recced this one, but I can’t find it, dammit.  Like, I JUST re-read it.  Help me out, here, Followers....

FOUND! @quietellen and @inessencedevided agree that it’s please forgive my most passionate disruptions by pumpkinpaix (scribogenesis) if the anon is looking for a modern AU where they're still cultivators

***

Anon (5) says:  hey! love your blog so much it’s amazing i love your comments and the images you make for each fic!!! [*thank you!*] i was wondering if you could help me find a fic. it was a modern!au and wwx finally gets lwx to sleep with him after a halloween party where he’s dressed in drag and he thinks lwj is straight and only wants to fuck him when he’s dressed like a girl and lwj thinks wwx is experimenting with gender and they end up fuck buddies until wwx breaks it off bc of a misunderstanding. thanks so much!

FOUND!  by @luckymoony AND @candicewright who agree that it’s  i'll be your girl by plonk

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Anon (6) says:  I’m looking for this fic that happens around the Sunshot Campaign/a little bit after that where LWJ helps WWX control his demonic cultivation when he gets angry by making out to distract him. Any help would be appreciated, thanks!

FOUND! last week!  We think it’s  Overcome by thunderwear

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Anon (7) says:

Hi! I’ve been trying to find an a/b/o fic that starts out with madam yu finding out wwx is an omega and wwx goes into heat in the cave at the burial mounds. Can’t remember much else. Sorry. Could you help me find it?

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@thegirlwhosawdeath (8) says:  So this is a specific fic that I can't find anymore, could you help me? It is after canon LWJ & WWX are together. LWJ had kink with YP!WWX before WWX died, and he still do now. He feels guilt and WWX those not know what is going on, he dos some things to find out what is going on. He surprises LWJ and redos the 'come back too Gusu' scene, where LWJ kind of Dom's him

FOUND!  by @akinohikari who says it’s devil from heaven by incendir [which I actually have bookmarked here, derp.]

***

Help me out, darlings!  @cqlfic, @cloudreadcesses, @wujificrec, @wangxianfics

#getinthefuckingjaeger #anonymous #fic finder #wangxian #wangxian fic finder #crowdsourcing #crowd-sourcing #let's find some fics #I love y'all so much #your collective brain is A LIBRARY

[relenafanel]

pardonthelitany replied to your post“who can provide me with the link to that list of...”

this one? http://pardonthelitany.tumblr.com/post/156665202236/a-shitposters-guide-to-political-bias-in-major

yes thank you

#pardonthelitany