#part of this is because my parents have raised me to believe that having any sexual/romantic feelings for someone is horrible

[queerprayers]

hi ! i hope you're doing well, and i just wanna say first that i love your blog and it just radiates comforting vibes :)

i wanted to ask for some advice. i chose god over a year ago after having this push-pull thing with him for almost ten before that. most of my issues with actually accepting him came from ideas i had about him from his more conservative/evangelical followers, which i began to debunk for myself after figuring out that god, not them, was who i wanted.

so i've been sticking to the old testament, mostly. i found god in there, grew to love him because of it, and it's just a beautiful text, but also there are far fewer conservative dogwhistles in there than there are in the new testament. the new testament is hard for me to look at, and i feel guilty about it.

and its like- ive grown up with jesus my whole life. my parents are methodist, i was raised methodist. but i've never felt very close to him, thanks to those who twisted his verses about love and kindness into weapons against people like me. i read these verses that mean so much (john 3:16 and the like) and all i get out of it is a crawling sense of dread. like the associations are Bad, and it seeps through the whole new testament.

all this long-winded nonsense is basically to say that somebody got their hands all over the new testament and now i look at it and it is just barren. have you ever experienced something like this? any advice on how to,, reclaim the new testament or something? (thank you so much for reading this holy shit it's long. sorry about that)

Thank you beloved, I'm glad you're here! No such thing as too long here, I promise—well, there might be on my end. (You've been warned.) I'm overjoyed that you've chosen to pursue God—separating what you've been told from what you seek to believe in is such a hard thing to navigate.

I'm gonna be honest, this is such a refreshing question and I'm glad that you're asking it. I overwhelmingly hear the opposite from Christians—that the New Testament is easy and loving and comforting, and the Old Testament is scary and violent or whatever. I always want to ask first, what their opinions of Judaism are, because that's a red flag to me; and next, have they read the NT? It isn't easy and it isn't always comforting, and I think too many Christians only read the parts that they think are. The fact that you're recognizing those hard things and wanting to deal with them is a beautiful thing—we should take these texts seriously enough to criticize and struggle with them.

First of all: You have no need to feel guilty for what other people have done with holy things, or for your emotions. You have not done something wrong by carrying this hurt with you. What we feel is not in our control—but we can listen to it. Let this be a movement of desire, not of guilt. You're seeking God past the dread. You want to grow enough that the ideas people have taught you don't stand between you and what you want—and you've already done so much of this growth. I believe that you can keep moving in the direction of God, and find God in more and more places. But you don't have to pretend it's not hard. And if it was easy I'm not sure that would be a good thing.

Your experiences and associations and discomfort and fear—they're your history and they're also the history of the text. I'm sure you've heard people say "Don't let stuff like that turn you away from the original meaning of the verses!" Or "Jesus didn't mean that!" But of course the verses hold weight. They've had baggage before they ever got to you—two thousand years of it. Hold space for the fact that they've been used to hurt you and others. That's not meaningless—it's part of the meaning now. People who claimed their destruction was what Jesus meant have added to the history of Jesus and the text—and people who created love and beauty in honor of those verses have also added to these histories. We can learn about the original meaning of the text, but we cannot erase or ignore the meanings that have existed over the years. Go into this without guilt or pressure or expectation, and bring the anger and confusion and bad experiences. The text is strong enough to handle them. God is strong enough to handle them.

I want to acknowledge that finding God in the Hebrew Bible and existing there with Them is a beautiful thing. You don't have to equally relate to every single part of a religion to create a home there. Of course I hope that you grow new connections with the NT, but if it's never the same as the OT, that's not a flaw or a failure. None of us can find all the places where God is present and hold them all equally. Our brains aren't big enough for that. You have created a beautiful connection with God, and I hope that you know that there are so many fulfilled, faithful people who have not, and will never, experience God in the NT. Of course these people generally aren't Christian—and that's obviously a choice you can make—but I hope that knowledge reminds you that you aren't doing anything wrong. You have a duty to God, not to religion. And you certainly don't have a duty to the ideas you've grown up with or translators or interpreters or even to Biblical writers. We enter religion to learn and create community and to fully live out our duty to God—religion serves us, not the other way around. 

I love that you brought up conservative dogwhistles because this is a point that, again, I've heard more people fall on the other side of! More people have a problem with the politics of the OT, for lots of reasons. The NT was written much closer to our current point in history, of course, in a time and culture much more familiar to most of us than Ancient Israel. The Roman Empire's language and government and philosophy has influenced the world immensely, and I think for most people it's therefore easier to exist in/relate to/project on. For you, though, this might be having the opposite effect. The fact that the Roman Empire is closer and more influential to our culture may make you more aware of its injustices and biases. Conservatism as we know it is much closer to values found in the Christian scriptures than the Jewish ones partially because it's more culturally and politically similar to ours. (Think about how many far-right people idolize the Roman Empire! And of course, think about how many conservatives are Christians.) 

I'm assuming, because you're someone who notices politics in texts, that you've probably confronted things in the OT that you've had to process and put in context and perhaps still struggle with. I know that you've been met with violence and patriarchy, and that you've read verses that you probably know have been used to justify racism, sexism, slavery, and homophobia. Perhaps you've come to these chapters and said something like, "Wow, this has been used for a lot of evil, and this is something I have to deal with, but I also want to give grace to the culture that existed this way and told these stories, see the times that systems like patriarchy are challenged and changed over time, and use this for good and liberation in my own life." Maybe this is easy for you, or maybe it's taken a lot of strength. 

Barbara Brown Taylor talks about "shadow languages" in her book Holy Envy (which I recommend)—languages in the Bible that assume things, that carry with them narratives we need to look out for. She identifies the language of contempt, the one of social hierarchy, the one that glorifies suffering for suffering's sake, the one that divides reality into opposed pairs. She tells us that "the purpose of staying on the lookout for languages like these is to prevent them from becoming uncontested parts of the Christian worldview. Every time I run into one of them hard enough to hurt, I turn around and look in the opposite direction, where there is almost always a counternarrative in scripture, just waiting for someone to notice it."

I think about how slavery is not abolished in the Bible—it has not been abolished ever. At various times in history, it has been taken for granted, challenged, uprooted, and changed form. Why are the ancient Israelites freed from captivity and go on to enslave people? Why does God move them to chip away at slavery but not fully eradicate it? Why does Paul say there is no slave or free under Christ Jesus, but preserves the social hierarchy inherent to that statement? It angers me that oppression is never abolished completely and immediately, but I also know that's not how people (or true stories) work. We take a lot of things for granted—and that leads many people to conservatism. I love Paul's writings, and I also know that his greatest sin (like many of us) was believing God's love liberated only as far as his imagination. He could imagine a God who loved the enslaved, could imagine a world in which their souls were equal, but could not imagine a world without slavery. He could imagine a spiritual equality of men and women, but not a social one. The gospel writers could worship a Jewish man as God, honor the scriptures he quoted, and add no nuance to the Jewish leaders who opposed him. They could imagine a messiah coming from Judaism but could not give grace to the Judaism around them.We all have failures of imagination, and we are always wrong. (Thanks be to God.)

I am not in the business of excusing harmful systems. I don't think you should do this when tackling the NT—I think you should challenge it and accuse it and dismantle it. But I also want you to remember the grace that you have brought to the Hebrew Bible. You have found God in a text with a lot of hard things and a lot of beautiful things—I bet you can do it again. Maybe it's more personal this time, maybe it's closer to your culture, but you have the skills. And maybe this is gonna make you go back to the OT with harsher eyes—so be it. Be curious about how this changes your relationship with history—humanity's and your own. However you understand conservatism, you can find it in both parts of the Christian Bible. And you can't take away the ways people have furthered that. But you can see them, and you can build relationships with the stories, knowing that your imagination can go further—and God's goes further still. You have been taught by bigoted people and a bigoted world, and you know it. You already know you want God, not them.

So what do we do when someone got their hands all over the New Testament? I love that question, because they absolutely have. They're still doing it. Someone got their hands all over the OT too—actually, probably more and worse someones seeing as it's a Jewish text and Christian hands are inherently meddling. But this is all part of the text's history. However much we believe God was involved, people wrote in their own language and from their own culture.  The curation and copying and collecting and translating and analysis inherent to the Bible's existence (it didn't spring fully formed into the King James Version) are people's hands. We can't take that away—and in fact, we needed their hands for these texts to get to us. 

Reclaiming the Bible for me has not included pretending those hands don't exist—especially when they're personal. What it has included is prying some of those hands off to see God underneath. The thing about that, though, is that it gets our fingerprints involved. You can't reach into a text and find God without getting your hands dirty. There is no pure holy text in this life. The NT that you're reading—unless you're smarter than me—is already translated. You can learn to read Greek, you can study history, but you're gonna be doing it with your own hands. While you're finding God in the text, accept that even if you go all the way back, the original writers' fingerprints are on the very first copy. 

Let this move you to know that none of it is empty. I acknowledge the barrenness you're describing as the only thing you can see right now—but know that even if this is overwhelming, it's proof that the text itself is full. The fact that so many people, for good and evil, have touched it and transformed it, the fact that you desire connection with it, means that it is not empty. There would be nothing there for you to want to reclaim—but you're asking.

I think it would be really interesting for you to find the humanity in the gospels. Look for the people. Yes, these are characters told and retold—you can see the fingerprints—but they were people first. Look for people reclaiming and messing around and taking cultural things for granted and challenging other things—and live in it with them. Don't approach any of it as a solid text that exists—look at it as a living, breathing text that we all tear into. And, yes, this means people are going to twist it almost beyond recognition, but they do not have a monopoly on joining the story—you bring your experiences and your biases. Be human with it, the way that I'm sure you are with the OT, which is full of flawed, evil people who sing beautiful songs. Be human with them.

Enlarge your theological circle. Read liberation theology, queer theology, disability theology. Read the Quran, which is an amazing time that people got their hands on the NT (as well as having its own history of violence). Find different, beautiful hands that tell these stories in new ways. I can't promise you'll find beauty—that's such an emotional and personal experience. We can't force beauty out of anything. But other people have found and created beauty, and we can experience it secondhand—through stained glass, a musical, a movie, a song, a poem—not because their eyes are better than yours, but because they're also honest.

Barbara Brown Taylor (again in Holy Envy) recounts wisdom from a visiting imam, who "explained that the long lineage of Muslim scholars who have worked collaboratively for centuries to interpret the Quran in the most humane ways are more to be trusted than those who spill blood based on their own readings and ambitions." There are always other traditions, and when all we can see is a weapon, there are those who will unclench our fists. 

I would encourage you to make sure you have a NT text that has footnotes to tell you when someone is quoting the Hebrew Bible. The NT is in relationship with, building on and interpreting and philosophizing about, the OT. If you are coming from the OT, bring those verses with you, the same way Jesus and early Christian writers did. The New Testament as a body of work did not exist for the first Christians—the scriptures they had were the ones you have connected with. You're in such good company. Look at how easily Jesus quotes scripture, the verses he adds on to and interacts with, the prophecies he sees himself in. Look at the sacrifice imagery that the gospel writers use to talk about Jesus—assuming that the reader will be familiar with these themes. Even within the OT, we can see later Jewish prophets criticizing and conversing with earlier verses—humanity is constantly in conversation with itself and God. You have such a good foundation for understanding this relationship.

The other good foundation you have? Wrestling with a text. It's the ones we're in community with that are the ones we're most often in conflict with and hold to the highest standards—for Jesus, this was the Jewish community he was a part of, and for you, this might be the NT. Have beef with your own scriptures and communities and religious leaders—reclaiming and wrestling are what the gospels are about. Acts and the letters in the NT are continuously debating the relevance of various OT verses. Do hard work on a text, and do it in good company.

Carry with you the scriptures you love as you travel into unfamiliar or painted-over territory. Know that you have something to come back to, however far you g0. While wading into waters you don't understand, you know that there's land under your feet—and you know that it's land that Jesus valued, that all the people in the NT valued, even as they wrestled with it. The first verses of the NT are a genealogy from Abraham to Jesus's adoptive father. Christians see this all as one story—whether you believe that right now or not, the human story is constantly moving, and God is your solid ground. 

Jesus set down a foundation on that rock of God and Christians have added bricks to it and torn stuff down and messed around and burned it and kept building it—but you know there's God under it, because you've seen Them. So when you read Paul awkwardly shoving some bricks together and think, "That's not how I would build a community…" know that God's under there. When you read Peter denying Jesus, know that his name still means "rock," that you can still create solid ground after everything. You know where God is, and also, our lives are ever-expanding journeys of finding where else God could be. Yours looks different from the Christians who consider the NT to be that same rock, but that's okay! It's okay if the OT is a firm foundation for you, and the NT is one of the bricks. Look for God in those awkward bricks, which I know you can do because you've already done it. King David wrote the most beautiful songs I know—you don't ignore his murder and rape, you honor the whole story.

John 3:16 is a much-loved verse—but it being more important than other verses is a construct. You don't have to like it—in fact, the context of this is Jesus talking to Nicodemus, who doesn't understand what he's saying. Jesus is very familiar with confusion and even anger as a response—and he even seems to seek it out sometimes. Nicodemus comes to him as a genuine student, and Jesus starts going on about being born again, something that his new student seems to have no foundation for. Oh, to be a confused new student rather than someone whose had "being born again" held over my head! I wish I could come to the idea with no baggage! I wish I had no foundation for that idea, so I could start over—which would, perhaps, come closer to what Jesus is saying than any evangelical teaching. 

Take care, keep trudging. Whatever path this brings you to, whatever communities you end up building, know that with God as the foundation, even awkward haphazard fingerprinted ripped-up texts can tell stories that we need to hear. I can't take away the associations you have with these texts, but I can pray you create new ones. Learn new songs, meet new characters. Get your hands messy. 

Don't force a positive relationship—what people have done with the text is a barrier to you right now, and this might be more of a journey with a barrier than a going through it. There are pieces of barriers I've broken open that come with me when I revisit those verses. You already have a more honest relationship with all of this than so many others, and you have the skills already to know that it is God, not the world's followers, that you want. 

I hope this wasn't long-winded nonsense, and I hope something here resonates. The short answer (which I probably should have put at the beginning) is that yes, I've experienced something like this. The year I couldn't read the Bible without panicking, I cried while watching The Prince of Egypt. In the years after that, I almost came back to it like I was converting—reading the basics, starting from scratch. Growing up and becoming purposely Christian (rather than your parents exactly) is a kind of conversion, and you have to reclaim the texts, and ask God to reclaim you as you are now. 

Isaiah 55:10-11 tells us that God's word pours out like rain, and never returns empty. It sticks with us until something grows inside us. And John begins his gospel by telling us that the word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. This is a living word, one that cried and got angry and fell in love with his friends and participated in a culture and wrestled with God's will and interpreted scripture and was a person with us. You'll have to forgive Christianity for being so human—God did it first. God got his fingerprints all over us, and we wrote texts that have God's living breathing word—and also our messy hands. Thank God for your hands, and the love that they will bring. 

<3 Johanna

#gonna be so real this was 11 pages on google docs and i got it down to 6. so if you think this is too long just know this. #asks

[cookinguptales]

So I’ve been enjoying the Disney vs. DeSantis memes as much as anyone, but like. I do feel like a lot of people who had normal childhoods are missing some context to all this.

I was raised in the Bible Belt in a fairly fundie environment. My parents were reasonably cool about some things, compared to the rest of my family, but they certainly had their issues. But they did let me watch Disney movies, which turned out to be a point of major contention between them and my other relatives.

See, I think some people think this weird fight between Disney and fundies is new. It is very not new. I know that Disney’s attempts at inclusion in their media have been the source of a lot of mockery, but what a lot of people don’t understand is that as far as actual company policy goes, Disney has actually been an industry leader for queer rights. They’ve had policies assuring equal healthcare and partner benefits for queer employees since the early 90s.

I’m not sure how many people reading this right now remember the early 90s, but that was very much not industry standard. It was a big deal when Disney announced that non-married queer partners would be getting the same benefits as the married heterosexual ones.

Like — it went further than just saying that any unmarried partners would be eligible for spousal benefits. It straight-up said that non-same-sex partners would still need to be married to receive spousal benefits, but because same-sex partners couldn’t do that, proof that they lived together as an established couple would be enough.

In other words, it put long-term same-sex partners on a higher level than opposite-sex partners who just weren’t married yet. It put them on the exact same level as heterosexual married partners.

They weren’t the first company ever to do this, but they were super early. And they were certainly the first mainstream “family-friendly” company to do it.

Conservatives lost their damn minds.

Protests, boycotts, sermons, the whole nine yards. I can’t tell you how many books about the evils of Disney my grandmother tried to get my parents to read when I was a kid.

When we later moved to Florida, I realized just how many queer people work at Disney — because historically speaking, it’s been a company that has guaranteed them safety, non-discrimination, and equal rights. That’s when I became aware of their unofficial “Gay Days” and how Christians would show up from all over the country to protest them every year. Apparently my grandmother had been upset about these days for years, but my parents had just kind of ignored her.

Out of curiosity, I ended up reading one of the books my grandmother kept leaving at our house. And friends — it’s amazing how similar that (terrible, poorly written) rhetoric was to what people are saying these days. Disney hires gay pedophiles who want to abuse your children. Disney is trying to normalize Satanism in our beautiful, Christian America. 

Just tons of conspiracy theories in there that ranged from “a few bad things happened that weren’t actually Disney’s fault, but they did happen” to “Pocahontas is an evil movie, not because it distorts history and misrepresents indigenous life, but because it might teach children respect for nature. Which, as we all know, would cause them all to become Wiccans who believe in climate change.”

Like — please, take it from someone who knows. This weird fight between fundies and Disney is not new. This is not Disney’s first (gay) rodeo. These people have always believed that Disney is full of evil gays who are trying to groom and sexually abuse children.

The main difference now is that these beliefs are becoming mainstream. It’s not just conservative pastors who are talking about this. It’s not just church groups showing up to boycott Gay Day. Disney is starting to (reluctantly) say the quiet part out loud, and so are the Republicans. Disney is publicly supporting queer rights and announcing company-supported queer events and the Republican Party is publicly calling them pedophiles and enacting politically driven revenge.

This is important, because while this fight has always been important in the history of queer rights, it is now being magnified. The precedent that a fight like this could set is staggering. For better or for worse, we live in a corporation-driven country. I don’t like it any more than you do, and I’m not about to defend most of Disney’s business practices. But we do live in a nation where rights are largely tied to corporate approval, and the fact that we might be entering an age where even the most powerful corporations in the country are being banned from speaking out in favor of rights for marginalized people… that’s genuinely scary.

Like… I’ll just ask you this. Where do you think we’d be now, in 2023, if Disney had been prevented from promising its employees equal benefits in 1994? That was almost thirty years ago, and look how far things have come. When I looked up news articles for this post from that era, even then journalists, activists, and fundie church leaders were all talking about how a company of Disney’s prominence throwing their weight behind this movement could lead to the normalization of equal protections in this country.

The idea of it scared and thrilled people in equal parts even then. It still scares and thrills them now.

I keep seeing people say “I need them both to lose!” and I get it, I do. Disney has for sure done a lot of shit over the years. But I am begging you as a queer exvangelical to understand that no. You need Disney to win. You need Disney to wipe the fucking floor with these people.

Right now, this isn’t just a fight between a giant corporation and Ron DeSantis. This is a fight about the right of corporations to support marginalized groups. It’s a fight that ensures that companies like Disney still can offer benefits that a discriminatory government does not provide. It ensures that businesses much smaller than Disney can support activism.

Hell, it ensures that you can support activism.

The fight between weird Christian conspiracy theorists and Disney is not new, because the fight to prevent any tiny victory for marginalized groups is not new. The fight against the normalization of othered groups is not new.

That’s what they’re most afraid of. That each incremental victory will start to make marginalized groups feel safer, that each incremental victory will start to turn the tide of public opinion, that each incremental victory will eventually lead to sweeping law reform.

They’re afraid that they won’t be able to legally discriminate against us anymore.

So guys! Please. This fight, while hilarious, is also so fucking important. I am begging you to understand how old this fight is. These people always play the long game. They did it with Roe and they’re doing it with Disney.

We have! To keep! Pushing back!

#disney #ron desantis #gay rights #lgbt #queer #lgbt history #queer history #homophobia #florida #us politics #religious fundamentalism #christianity #long post #god that should cover all the pertinent tags and content warnings phew

[inkskinned]

it is totally okay to be hurt and tired and fed up with the american schooling system but i need you to understand that we need to be better about loudly and routinely defending public education.

yes, many teachers suck, many schools utterly suck. i also got bullied and was absolutely not given the right support for my needs. i am not defending public education because it was kind to me. i am defending it because it needs to exist.

right-wing republicans do not want an educated population. they want kids to be homeschooled or in private school. there is a huge religious undertone to this.

the most common argument is that despite high costs, the "result" is not "good" enough. they point to failing schools as proof that public education is just never going to work out. there will be arguments made here that you actually agree with: that teachers can be bullies, that we taught online for 2 years and still charged the same amount of tuition, that we have no recourse for students to actually have agency or a voice, and that schools are now unsafe for kids due to risk of illness and gun violence.

these are all placing the blame in a fraudulent way, one intended to get your parents to homeschool you. the less kids in a school, the less federally-awarded funding for that school, the less any school succeeds. they will not mention the fact it is their legislation that takes away important funding opportunities, that teachers are living at or below the poverty line, that buildings are not kept up to code, that administration is overpaid and forces specific curriculums, that corporations like (my personal enemy) Pearson Education control certain classroom goals because teachers can't afford other options. they pretend to be ignorant of the gun violence and say "oh just get a gun" - but these are the same people who will be sending their child to a private school with a bulletproof backpack. they don't care if your kid dies, though. they "don't believe" in covid, but they did get their kid vaccinated, because of course they did.

it is a closed loop. conservative parents hear the fearmongering and remove children from the system. frequently these parents are also deeply religious. the kids are raised without access to other media & learn to parrot their parents. you have now created a new generation of conservatives. additionally, one of the parents/caregivers must stay home and homeschool the children, usually for free. i will give you 1 guess which parent tends to stay home to homeschool the children. these parents are encouraged to have many, many children. those children are most likely not getting access to safe sex ed.

we might laugh at fox news suggesting teachers are forcing children to use kitty litter but: first of all, there is kitty litter in the classroom. it's part of an emergency kit in case children are locked in due to a shooter. so that's fucking dystopian, and the fact they've completely reimagined the scenario to somehow make the teachers look bad when it's instead a fucking huge symbol of our failure as a country to protect our children.... it feels a little intentional.

secondly: don't just dismiss the situation. because, yeah, obviously, no teacher is encouraging kids to be a catboy. but the actual undertone that fox news is trying to sew is an outright distrust of teachers and of public education. they rely on the dehumanization of trans people as a common touchstone to hide the fact they're pushing two agendas at once. (which is ironic. because the thing they accuse teachers of. is pushing. an agenda.)

whenever someone tells you they want you to read less, you should be suspicious of that. when someone tries to separate you and your education, you should be suspicious of that. i don't even like incel rhetoric nor would i want my kids exposed to it - but i would not take away my child's (age-appropriate) access to the internet. i would just provide more educational materials, not less. the difference here is that i believe we can resolve ignorance with knowledge; whereas conservatives believe that ignorance is bliss.

they misappropriate funding and demonize teachers. they pull the same trick each time - the same thing we are seeing with anti-trans rhetoric. they do not want you to have access to safe sex ed, so they act horrified, claim sex ed teaches you how to thrust deep, claim that we have no idea what "age-appropriate" means. since the mid-nineties, the united states has spent at least 2 billion dollars on abstinence-only education, even though to quote the above link: "a preponderance of studies has found no effect of abstinence education at reducing adolescent pregnancy". conservatives want you to think less of any person struggling with addiction so they can continue their racist "war on drugs", so they spend up to $750 million dollars a year on the DARE program which has absolutely no effect. acting like teachers "must" be "grooming" children is just the same thing - so they can demand that funding either goes to their causes or the funding doesn't "exist" ("i'm not paying for our kids to learn that thing!")

and they want you to feel uncaring about this. they are aware that you will hate some parts of your school experience. pretty much everyone does. they want to lean into the parts that you hate so that you don't put up a fight about it when they take it away for not being "good enough."

i know i maybe sound like a conspiracy theorist. but truly. truly. it is beneficial for conservatives to reduce your faith in the american public schooling system.

one of the explicitly stated campaign promises of the conservative party: to axe the Department of Education in 2024.

i know we are all tired and burnt out and there is so much else wrong with their entire platform. but maybe just - pay attention to this one.

#i can't believe i have to say this #the conservative party is legit like ''is it anything good? okay we hate it.'' #''lets kill lgbt people and ummmmm school children shouldnt be able to read they should be at home watching jordan peterson :)" #the fact that it's like all related is. wild. #like it's wild bc if u start being like. actually making it impossible to afford housing is part of how they keep the nuclear family..... #it's just like lines connecting to lines. EXCEPT ITS OBVIOUS? #what's wild to me about most conspiracy theorists is that they're like . ohhhh the govt is hiding shit!!!!!!! they don't want u to know!!! #and im like. this old man literally got up on stage and said he hates public education and will let our kids die before taking away ak-47s #and ppl are like: lol thats just bob's sense of humor he didn't mean it literally uwu

[uglyducklingofthe2000s]

Millionaires Boys Club - LN

Summary: Lando is reminded that something can't be bought no matter how many millions he has in his bank account. Money doesn't fix a broken heart.

ex!reader

No part 2 requests please

If there was a point in his life that Lando knew he'd fucked up. It was when y/n broke up with him.

The slow head shake, stepping back away from him as if she was scared he'd hurt her, red puffy eyes that looks raw, her wobbling voice telling him to just leave her alone.

He knew he could get her bad but that moment truly made him realise the type of power and trust she'd placed in him but he'd broken it. But now he's going to fix it.

So he did what any many with millions in the bank does.

He was going to win her back with gifts. Everything he could think of and she could ever dream of.

Or so he thought.

"I don't know who you thought you were dating but I'm beginning to think you don't know your ex girlfriend at all." Max sighs as he opens his boot to reveal every single gift Lando had sent y/n still wrapped and untouched.

Even flowers that were wilted and dying had been left in their original packaging. It didn't look like any of the notes were opened and read.

"I don't get it. What the hell do I have to do?" Lando groans dropping his head back. "She's being so difficult. I just spend god knows how much on all this stuff."

"You ever thought maybe she doesn't want her ex buying her back?" Max questions making him look at his friend. "I'm just saying mate. You've spend all this money on her but clearly you not buying her stuff wasn't the problem."

Lando had been very elusive about what triggered the break up. He'd seemed to keep the details vague just saying it he didn't understand what had happened really.

"You tried talking to someone who has you blocked?" Lando grumbles when Max suggests he just try calling her. He'd tried.

"Then maybe it's time to give up and let her go mate, you can't force her to forgive you for whatever you're not telling my you did." Max states earning a huff. "Maybe figure out what you did that landed you single again and then try again if you're not going to give up."

-

Y/n sighs as she steps outside with her sisters dog and immediately Lando jumps out his car like a crazed stalker and practically throws himself at her.

"Jesus Christ." Y/n gasps stumbling away while her sisters dog excitedly jumps up at Lando. "Worst guard dog ever."

"I could get you a better one if you think you need it."

"For god sake-when is it going to compute Lando? Money is not going to fix this." Y/n frowns and it becomes all too apparent within seconds that Lando has made something snap.

More tears appear. She's hurting, which is why she has been hiding out at her sisters in hopes of Lando being too scared of her sister's fiancé who is very protective over his future sister-in-law to come see her. Clearly that plan backfired.

Being vulnerable isn't something Lando is familiar with. But he knows he's at a loss of what he's meant to do here.

"Y/n, I-"

"Lando, I can't do this. Not now. I need-You need give me space and time and just...let me think." Y/n states swallowing thickly. "And stop buying things because it's not going to win me back. I don't want you to buy me things all the time. You broke my heart, Lando. Money didn't break it, so it's not going to fix it."

Lando is somewhat stunned by her words.

It's not as if he parents raised him to believe that money is the end all and be all. But he does think it's pretty important in general, he definitely feels better after buying something. Hell, when y/n walked out he bought himself a new Lando Rover to improve his mood.

Though now he's thinking about it, it didn't really do anything to perk him up or distract him from his newly single status.

Lando watches y/n walk off before hearing the door open and close.

"You know...she's not upset because you're here." Y/s/n states as she walks over to the F1 driver. "She's upset because she wants you here...but she wants you to understand what you did."

Lando looks at y/n's sister with a sigh before she sends him a sympathetic smile and rubs his arm bicep gently.

"You'll figure out how to fix this, but buying her stuff...she doesn't want you for you money."

"Thanks y/s/n." Lando mumbles not adding that as the days go on. He's beginning to doubt that he has that ability.

-

Lando sighs as he inserts the new SIM card into his phone. He had to get a new one purely so he could call y/n. Grovelling might be easier if he didn't have the start of the F1 calendar in full swing.

"Hello?" Y/n answers leaving Lando clinging to just that word as some comfort that she's at least ok. "Hello?"

"Hi, y/n." Lando greets hoping the line isn't about to go dead.

"Lando...how's testing going?" Y/n asks softly seeming to try and keep the conversation light.

"It could be better. You should be here." Lando states earning a sigh immediately. "Y/n...I know I fucked up and I know I don't deserve you. I-I know that I didn't care about the stuff that was important to you and I should-I do now. I care and I want you to be here with me. Always."

"How am I supposed to know that you mean any of this?" Y/n mumbles the swallowing thickly. "I don't want to be with you and things to go back to how they were...you got annoyed at me for being upset that you cancelled our anniversary plans."

Their two year anniversary.

Y/n had spent weeks planning it around all the F1 and McLaren stuff, along with making sure Lando could go on all his winter break trips with no interruption. She'd planned something just for them and Lando cancelled because he wanted to do something for Quadrant.

Usually she'd be ok with that, but they both know it was something the Quadrant team could've handled without him being there. He made the choice to throw all her effort away and then didn't understand when she got upset.

It wasn't even about the fact it was the only celebration of the milestone. It was the fact he knew she'd gone to such lengths so they could celebrate it and he didn't care.

"I'm sorry, y/n. You deserve better than me, but I'm too selfish to really let you go and find better." Lando states then sighing. "I'm also going to do better than I had been doing. I promise you."

Y/n is quiet on the other side for a bit amping up his nerves. He knows that he is sort of winning her over because she'd have hung up or told him that this was a waste of time.

"Would you hate me if I pay for you to fly over here?"

"Yeah, I'll let you pay." Y/n laughs then clearing her throat.

"I'm going to rearrange all the anniversary celebrations too." Lando declares making her laugh. "What?"

"Lando, you are an amazing man with a lot of abilities but arranging celebrations like that isn't not your forte."

"Give me a chance. A man trying to redeem himself shouldn't be doubted."

-

Lando insisted on picking y/n up from the airport and he finds himself in complete awe of seeing her again.

"Come here baby." Lando grins making her drop her bags and run towards him. A perfect airport scene from a movie if there ever was one.

He catches her, lifting her body up as she wraps her legs around his waist as they catch each other in a kiss that is so long await that neither realised how badly they needed it.

"Slap me next time. Slap me and knock sense into me next time I'm stupid enough to fuck up so badly that you have to leave me." Lando states making her lean back away from him for a moment. "Serious, just slap me."

"Ok. I will." Y/n smiles with a nod before she slowly drops her legs from the man's waist but he keeps hold of her waist. "I missed you...a lot."

"I missed you to. And...I never want to fuck up that colossally again." Lando promises before kissing her gently. "I'm sorry I ever did to begin with. I was being a dick."

"You won't find me arguing with you there." Y/n smiles before she shifts back going to pick up her bags that she'd dropped only for him to tsk and pick them up for her. "Oh sorry, I forgot you have to do everything for me now."

"Everything and maybe a little more, till you tell me we might finally be even."

Taglist: @namgification @hiireadstuff @jsjcue @geniusalpaca @itsjustkhaos

#f1 #fanfic #formula 1 #lando norris x reader #lando norris #lando norris imagine #ln4 x reader #lando norris x y/n #lando x reader #lando #norris #lando norris mclaren #lando norris one shot #lando norris fluff #lando norris angst #lando norris x you #lando norris fanfic #lando norris imagines #ln4 #ln4 angst #ln4 imagine #ln4 fic #ln4 fluff #mclaren #mclaren f1 #mclaren formula 1 #mclaren racing #ln4 one shot #ln4 x you #ln4 x y/n

[diddybok]

i’m actually obsessed with the kinks drabble u did, can u pls do it for the maknae line 🙏🏽

i picked yours to be the one to hold the absolute chaos that is abt to unfold. so i hope you were waiting patiently my love coz here it is!

all characters depicted in my writing are from my own imagination and do NOT in any way represent nor reflect the people in real life :)

➩pairing: maknae line x gn!reader

➩genre(s): smut, pwp

➩warnings: swearing, unprotected sex (wrap before you tap), penetration (not specified what hole, this one is for all the delulu’s out there) , kinks: mask, praise, degradation, oral fixation. 

➩wc: 10.3k (10331)

➩author’s note: here it is. the long awaited maknae line. this is the second longest(?) fic i’ve done. but now i can continue working on my seungmin fic that’s a part of the afterglow series. now THAT is something to wait for *lip bite emoji*

➩part(s): previous

jisung | mask | 2.1k (2188) words

“Ji! Can you come here for a second?” You call from the bathroom. Your hands are currently around your back trying to do up the zipper of your costume, but it won’t budge. 

Jisung comes running in, eyes wide and eyebrows raised. 

“What happened? I came as fast as I could!” He asks, scanning you up and down. 

You furrow your eyebrows at his dramatics before shaking your head softly. You turn away from him and point to your back. 

“Zipper won’t go up. Can you try for me?”

“Oh, yeah sure.”

As Jisung grabs the zip and tugs it a few times, it finally closes. You thank him and step back, assessing yourself in the mirror. 

You and Jisung were invited to a halloween party and you decided, obviously, to go in a couple’s costume. It’s your favourite pastime for both of you really. Pretending as if you two are a couple when really you’re just best friends, but the public doesn’t need to know that. 

You also told his parents that the two of you were dating as a joke, but he doesn’t know that. You are exceptionally good at keeping up with the whole ‘significant other’ appearances. 

“I can’t believe we’re gonna be the best dressed at the party and we haven’t even arrived yet.” Jisung says, flexing in the mirror. 

You stifle a laugh as you admire your handiwork. You were in charge of picking the costume and making sure to get the props and makeup correct. You decided that you wanted to go as Ghost and Soap from Call of Duty.

Okay, not exactly a couple’s costume, but you wouldn’t stop pestering Jisung to be Ghost saying that he would look good in a skull mask until he finally caved and agreed. 

Now you’re having regrets as he is feeling himself a little too much and he is looking a little too good doing so. You have yet to see him with his full mask and headgear on as he requested for you to give him a black smokey eye. 

You use your thumb to wipe some of the excess eyeshadow that rests on the top of his cheek and you give him one playful tap. He thanks you and immediately grabs the rest of his costume. 

What a good job you did because he is starting to seriously look too sexy for his own good. You can barely look at him as he assembles his mask and headgear. Then he turns to face you, his arms out wide. 

Oh. 

Wow. 

This is certainly a strange feeling you are experiencing inside of you right now. He looks, to put it plainly, delectable. And you seriously would want nothing more than to take a bite out of him-

“Y/n? Let’s go~” Jisung says, clicking in front of your face. 

You shake those inappropriate thoughts from your brain. You are not to think of him that way, absolutely not. 

                         ──・──・・✿ ・・──・──

The party most definitely helps to distract from the glory that is Jisung. You have loosened up a little, enjoying the music, people’s costumes and the atmosphere as a whole. 

“Y/n! God I’ve been looking everywhere for you. We can’t be a couple’s costume if we’re constantly separated, you know.” Jisung yells over the loud music, frowning. 

You look up at him, his beautiful big brown eyes standing out from the white mask. Perhaps convincing him that this would be a good costume was not good for your mental wellbeing after all. 

“Yeah…maybe.”

“What do you mean yeah maybe? Just yes.” he grabs ahold of your hand and pulls you close. You can smell his cologne, the one you bought him for his birthday. You take a deep breath. “Come, let’s go upstairs for a bit.” He says starting to lead you towards the staircase. 

Your eyes widen and you try to plant your feet on the ground. 

“Wait, just us? Like alone? Why?” You stammer. 

He just looks at you as if you aren’t thinking straight. He tries to move you again but you don’t budge. You see him roll his eyes before you let out a questionable noise of surprise as he picks you up and carries you up the stairs. 

He jiggles the handles of a few doors before finding an unlocked room. Being mindful not to bash your head or your feet, he manoeuvres his way through the doorway and places you gently on the bed. As you settle the unwanted swarm of butterflies in your stomach, Jisung goes over to the door and locks it. 

“Why are we up here Ji?” You ask, your hands fiddling with a zip on your costume as you look around the room. 

He takes off his helmet to free his hair; his mask shortly follows and he blinks to adjust to the light. Running a hand through the messy locks, he sits down beside you on the bed. 

“Just needed a moment away y’know? It was getting a bit much down there. You really had to pick a costume that would draw all the attention to us huh?” He says nudging you with his elbow. 

You wince slightly, rubbing the side of your ribs before squinting at him. 

“You told me you wanted to be the centre of attention. I should be hearing a thank you, not complaints.” Jisung shakes his head at your words. 

“I think it’s this mask, or the combat gear, or both. It’s certainly getting a rile off people.” He says in all seriousness. You miss the way his eyes lingers on you with a pointed look before they cast away to a corner of the room. 

“Well of course. A mask automatically makes somebody look way more fuckable.” You say nonchalantly. 

He turns to you, a smug smile on his face. 

“Are you saying I’m only fuckable with this mask on?” Jisung says in a sultry tone. 

You blink, seemingly caught like a deer in headlights. Has his voice always sounded so enticing?

“You and I both know that isn’t the case. But it damn sure helps your case.” Jisung gawks at this. His arm moving behind your waist and settling dangerously close to your ass as he leans in closer to you. 

“My case huh?” He tilts his head at you, eyes squinting slightly. “You mean to say you wouldn’t fuck me in all my glory right now?” He questions, his voice nearing a whisper. 

“Are you drunk?”

“Off you, yeah.”

You roll your eyes and lightly smack his chest. He grabs your hand gently and tugs your arm, making you involuntarily fall into his chest. You try to move back, but his other arm lowers you down onto the bed, caging you in. He smirks at you. 

“Want me to put the mask on?” He removes his grasp on your hand and his fingers dance along your jaw. “That way it doesn’t technically count as me, but Ghost, who gets to have his way with you.” He purrs. 

What the fuck is in the air tonight? Is Phil Collins playing somewhere?! You awkwardly chuckle. 

“You know we’re only supposed to act like a couple in front of other people right? Nobody is having their way with anybody.” You say more to yourself rather than to him. 

You knew it was a lie the minute it came out of your mouth. Now your costume is broken from the sheer force of Jisung and his manly ways of needing to rid you of your clothes. 

“Fuck, fuck yes. You’re so fucking tight baby, shit~” Jisung, or rather ‘Ghost’ says as he grinds down into you. 

The way he calls you baby makes your heart flutter. It’s not as if he hasn’t before, but those times he wasn’t, well, in you. 

You really can’t believe he is inside of you right now. Inside of you whilst he adorns that incredibly sexy skull mask. 

His deep grunts and the sound of the headboard banging against the wall over the muffled music from downstairs sends a shot of ecstasy straight into your veins. 

“Bet you couldn’t fuckin’ keep it together at the thought of me in this mask huh? I seen the way you were looking at me downstairs darling, fuck, just had to get you all to myself. Couldn’t take much more of your pretty eyes looking at me like that any longer.” Jisung says as he repositions himself onto his knees. 

He grabs your waist, your back arching off the bed as he uses you like his personal fleshlight. 

The sounds of your moans are sure to make anybody who walks by stop and listen. No doubt blushing profusely whilst needing to quickly flee to give you your privacy. 

Your hands reach up, grasping anything they could get a hold of. You manage to grab a buckle from his helmet and you lift your head to look at his mask. 

“Ah fuck Y/n. Please don’t look at me like that. You’re squeezin’ so tight around me every time you look at my face. Driving me fuckin’ insane baby.” Jisung says, his fingers digging deeper into your waist as he pounds into you harder. 

His grunts turn into that of a whine. His breath no doubt, creating condensation inside of his mask. 

You run your fingers over the dips and curves of his mask. His hand trails to your back, lifting your body up so that your chest is flush against him.

Not casting your eyes away from the mask, you begin to grind down into his lap. His hands settle on the curve of your back, his fingers harshly gripping the supple flesh. 

“Y/n—”

You just wrap your arms around his neck, your head resting on his shoulder as you start to bounce up and down. Jisung gladly meets you halfway by thrusting up into you at full force. 

“Baby I can’t, not when you feel this good. I’m, shit, I’m gonna come Y/n.” Jisung whines, his breath becoming short. 

“Me too Ji. I’m about to—”

“Come with me Y/n. Please, please I need you to feel good with me baby.” Jisung says. He releases one of his hands from you and he throws his helmet and mask off. 

The sight with him wearing the mask is certainly one to engrave into your brain. But Jisung with his hair messy, eyes full blown with desire; only for you. Sweat dripping down his hairline and his plump lips parted as he releases quick breaths is something you would pay to see over and over again. 

His hand makes his way to your chest, pinching and twisting the hardened bud before enveloping it with his mouth. 

The sensation of his mouth on your nipple and his relentless fucking up into makes you see stars. You throw your head back, stilling your movements as you come. 

If Jisung wasn’t catching feelings already then he did after he heard his name so gorgeously mewled from your lips; sending him over the edge as he pumped his load inside of you. 

He shouldn't have, but he did. You simply felt just too good. 

As you both come down from your high with heavy pants and small chuckles here and there, you assess the damage done. 

Not to your relationship, but rather your clothes. 

“So, through your fit of horny rage, did it occur to you that ripping apart my only costume that I brought would leave me topless?” You ask him with a raised eyebrow. 

He looks down at your exposed chest, then at the floor where your broken top resides. 

“Can’t you put it on and, y’know, just hold it tight whilst we find our way outta here?” He suggests. 

You look down at the costume. Sure, some of it may be salvageable, doesn’t mean you want to hold it up to your chest and risk some drunkard bumping into you causing you to release your grip. 

You get off the bed and start looking through the chest of drawers. Certainly not appropriate to do in somebody else’s home, but you don’t feel too bad considering their house will be trashed to a point where a large amount of money will need to be invested into replacing and fixing the damages. 

Luckily, you find a shirt. You go to put it on but Jisung stops you. He takes the shirt from your hands and he opens it up, gently dressing you. Once he pulls the shirt over your head, he places a totally platonic kiss to your soft lips. 

You tilt your head up at him, a silent question that he seems to understand. 

“Because I want to take it off you, actually take my time with you when we get back and do it properly. Do it for real.” He says, his voice above a mere whisper. 

Grabbing your hand, he leads the two of you out of the party. You can’t seem to wipe the smile off your face. 

Who knew that Jisung wearing a mask would lead to this point? Not you, that’s for sure!

felix | praise | 2.2k (2205) words

The clock reads 01:36 am as you make your way to the skate park. The day was filled with sun and blue sky promising you a nice clear night sky covered in a blanket of stars. You climb the ramp and your senses are already filled with Felix. 

“Thought you said you were gonna get here before me?” Felix teases not moving from his current position. You scoff lightly and wiggle your way into his arms and under the blanket. 

Sure this may be slightly intimate for friends to do, but you know that Felix is a touchy person and you don’t mind all that much. Especially when he is the only one who agrees to stargaze with you at late hours of the night. 

                         ──・──・・✿ ・・──・──

Time passes by and the two of you lay there listening to your playlist and the crickets. 

“Lix?”

“Hmm?”

“I finished reading the book that I had been putting off for ages” You say smiling softly. You feel his head turn to look down at you, so you meet his eyes, tilting your head up from his chest. 

“Seriously?” You nod. “Wow, I’m so proud of you angel! Did you enjoy it?” He gleams. 

Your brain takes a second to process what he has just said. Your face faltering and your hand that laid flat on his chest, now bunching up his shirt. 

“Y/n? Did you enjoy it?” Felix asks again, chuckling softly at your fist balling up his shirt. You could only release a small hum in agreement. Felix looks back up to the stars and you miss the cocky smirk that now adorns his face. 

“Hm, you’ve made me proud so far. You wanna use your words and tell me what you liked about the book like the good little angel you are?” Felix speaks lowly. 

You can’t help but to squeeze your thighs together because of the way he is praising you right now. What has gotten into him? More specifically, what has gotten into you?!

“Uh, I liked how there was a story in the book” You say hurriedly, looking at the stars. Anything but him. Felix lets out a roar of laughter which inevitably snaps you out of your trance. 

“Why are you laughing?” You groan, unaware of the nonsensical sentence you had just said. 

He just shakes his head and pulls you closer into his embrace. His hand starts to stroke at your side and you are suddenly becoming extremely aware of the proximity between the two of you. 

“Oh look, a shooting star!” You lie, pointing up to the sky to try and ease the tension. 

However, Felix, much to your dismay, was not looking up at the sky, but rather at you. Looking at you like either the only person in the world, or the tastiest sweet treat he has ever seen. 

Does he want to dote on you or eat you? You really can’t decipher which as you study his face. 

“Why are you looking at me like that…”

“You’re just so good, so so sweet. I love having you in my life. I’m always so proud of everything you do. Makes me wanna keep you all to myself and not let anyone experience your sweetness.” Felix says, his other hand lifting your chin up to look him in the eyes. Something you are really struggling to do. 

You gulp, unsure of the feelings that bubble in the pit on your stomach. 

“M’serious. You have the most gorgeous smile doll, so pretty.”

Butterflies? Perhaps butterflies are fluttering in your stomach. 

“Especially when I’m the one that makes you smile. I shouldn’t say this, but I think about you all the time. You’re always on my mind, Y/n.” Felix says, his eyes now wondering to the twinkles in the sky. 

You can’t breathe. You know he likes to get personal, but not like this. Never like this. Something is different with the way he’s talking to you. It has been ever since the last time you were at the skate park with him and he told you how pretty you looked. 

It may have been a slip of the tongue, but you expressed to him that you like when he would praise you. 

Now the little shit has found a way to constantly fluster you. 

“All good thoughts I hope.” You say breaking the silence that was brewing between the two of you. 

“Of course. Could never be anything bad with you angel. Even if I was upset with you, all you have to do is just look at me with those perfect eyes and I’m yours. Can’t ever stay mad at you,” he shakes his head. “Never.”

You sit up, looking down at him with your mouth agape. He turns to look towards you, his arm going under his head to prop it up. He’s clearly been going to the gym recently because his arms are getting toned, and bigger. 

The protruding veins on his forearms are enough to make you drool. 

“Why would you say all that to me knowing I can’t kiss you for it.” You say, crossing your arms. He chuckles at you. 

“Who says you can’t?”

You look around the empty skate park as if the answer was obvious. 

“Uh, literally the number one rule in the rulebook of best friends? It’s the same for everyone ever. You kiss and you open up a door of complications.” You say matter-of-factly. 

Felix sits up, the blanket falling from his chest and pooling at his waist. He places his hand in the space between your crossed legs as he dips his head slightly under to look at you through his eyelashes. 

“Fuck the rulebook. You know you and I don’t follow rules anyways. That’s why we hop the locked gate to the park almost every night.” He states, smirking. 

You can’t argue with that. He got you there. Though you aren’t done putting up a fight so you shake your head to disagree with something you clearly agree with him on. 

“Well yes, but no. We can’t kiss.”

“I wanna kiss you.” He says looking at your lips. 

“I just said we can’t.”

“Let me kiss you Y/n.” He licks his lips, his gaze unwavering. 

You hesitate, but stand strong in this battle as you shake your head. 

“Lix, strictly prohibited.”

“One teeny tiny kiss can’t hurt.” He says, his voice dropping dangerously low. 

Gosh he looks so pretty underneath the moonlight. He literally has a twinkle in his eye. Not to mention his own set of stars that are sprinkled across his nose and under his eyes. 

“I…want to, but—”

“But you’re talking too much. Let’s busy your lips shall we? Be my good little angel and kiss me.” He whispers, bringing his hand to cup your cheek.

You aren’t the world’s strongest soldier as you close the distance between you. Your lips entwine with his and fall into a rhythmic pattern almost immediately. 

He smiles into the kiss whispering a ‘There you go doll’ making you squeeze those thighs together to relieve some of the pressure. 

It’s cold outside, but the heat that your bodies emit are keeping you both warm as your body’s move in tandem. He kneels as you are on all fours, taking him down your throat. 

“Y-yes~ So good. Just like that for me, doll. Just like that.” Felix moans as he pushes your head up and down his throbbing length. 

Eager to please, you hollow your cheeks, taking him as far down your throat as you can get him. You moan around him and his head falls back as he holds your head down and thrusts into your mouth, making you gag. 

“Good fucking angel. Taking me so far down that pretty little throat of yours. Shit, you gonna let me fuck your pretty hole? Please baby, make me happy and let me fuck you slow.”

He releases his hold on you and repositions himself. The blanket is now being used as a barrier between your naked bodies and the cold concrete beneath you. 

Risky considering a guard could decide to do their job tonight and parole the park, but they never do. And that is at the farthest part of your brain as you now crawl up Felix’s body. Rubbing yourself up and down his length. 

He releases a soft grunt, grabbing your hips forcing you to stop your movement. 

“Don’t tease.” He warns as he raises his eyebrow at you giving you a firm smack on your ass. 

You giggle, biting your lip as you attempt to move your hips once more before he smacks you harder this time. 

“Naughty. Don’t start acting up now doll or else I won’t be so nice hm? Will you be good for me?” He asks lifting your hips slightly as he grabs his dick. He pumps it once before he runs it over your core a couple of times. 

Realising he was waiting for your answer, you nod vigorously. He smiles at you before sinking you down on his cock, both of you letting out a long, breathy moan. 

“So warm, so tight, fuck you’re choking me darling.” Felix growls, thrusting up into you slowly. 

You rest your hands on his chest, meeting his thrusts halfway. 

“Oh look at you. You wanna take the lead? Go on then doll. Ride me, but go slow baby yeah?” He lays still, his hands busying themselves with your nipples.

Taking his command, you start to ride him slowly. You close your eyes as you cherish each vein, each ridge of his dick as your walls envelope him. 

“You look so pretty on top of me Y/n. Mm, I will never get this image out of my head. You’re made for me.” He pulls you down so that your chest lays on his as he starts to thrust up into you. He simply couldn’t resist the temptation that is you. 

“Shit, can’t let you go after this. I’ll be damned if you fuck anybody else. You can’t, you’re mine now. Say it. Open your eyes, doll and tell me you’re mine.” He speaks into your ear before turning your head to face him. 

“I’m yours Felix. Always have been.” You say with a soft whimper. 

“Ah fuck~ Good. You’re damn right you always have been, my angel.” He starts to speed up, his hand trailing to between your legs to give you that extra stimulation. 

“Lix I’m close.” You say, meeting his thrusts again as you whine loudly. 

“I know baby, I know. Wanna come for me? Yeah you do. Be my good little angel and come on this cock.” 

That was all you needed as you gushed all over him. Your legs quiver as you clench tightly around him. 

“That’s it, feel good on my cock doll. You’re squeezin’ me so fucking tight love.” Felix’s voice is shaky as he wraps his arms around your waist and begins to chase his release. 

He only lasts a couple more thrusts before he’s moaning your name so beautifully in your ear as he releases inside of you. You feel it, there’s so much as he empties his dick all in your hole. 

You look down to where the two of you connect, his hips finally stilling as he breathes heavily. You lift up off of him and the mixture of your climax seeps out and drops back onto his length. Following put, Felix looks down at the mess you’ve both made, smiling smugly. 

He grabs a handful of your ass, squeezing tightly before he smacks it. 

“Clean it up.”

Without a second thought, you move down and settle between his legs. With your ass perched in the air, you don’t waste time as you lick up and down his length. Sucking his balls into your mouth as you collect every last drop of the result of tonight’s escapades. 

He has to grab your hair and pull your head up, the feeling of your tongue and soft wet mouth too much for an overstimulated Felix. 

“Okay okay, shit, you did such a good job for me. Never expected anything less from my angel. M’so proud of you, c’mere.” He says, opening his arms wide. 

You move to lay beside him and he folds the both of you up in the blanket. To the best of his ability anyway. 

You both calm down, your senses momentarily heightened. Stroking your arm he litters the side of your head and your forehead with kisses. He then lifts your chin up to face him, planting a deeply soft kiss to your lips. 

“I’m so proud of you. My little star,” Another kiss. “You shine brighter than all of the ones in the sky,” Another kiss. “I promise. You’re mine, I’m yours.” His voice, a softly spoken promise. 

“I’m yours, you’re mine.” You say, smiling at him. 

Felix doesn’t have to play pretend in the little world he has created that consists of you and him as now he gets to finally live in the reality of it. And you, you’re just happy to be a part of this new constellation that’s been written in the stars. 

seungmin | degradation | 2.9k (2929) words

“Oh I would. I definitely would. ‘Til my jaw locks, the neighbours know their name, the wallpaper peels off the wall. You would need at least ten big bodied people to try to pry me off of them. I am so serious.” You practically drool. 

You were showing Seungmin edits of your current celebrity crushes, having said extremely vulgar things about them and just what you would do for the past thirty minutes.  

And no, you do not care if these said crushes may also consist of pixelated characters from games. If a person is attractive, they are attractive. You are not fussy. 

Seungmin on the other hand has had to deal with his inbox of all his social media being full of edits that you bombard him with. Safe to say he is sick of it. 

“You are disgusting” Seungmin groans. 

“Yep. They so could have me in any position”

“Have you no shame?”

“Any day of the week.”

“Y/n, stop.”

“For them I am simply a hole-”

“Jesus fucking christ! Can you for once in your life not act like a fucking slut?” Seungmin questions, raising his voice slightly. 

Oh. Oh. 

You stop dead in your tracks, gulping loudly. You don’t say another word. Fearful for if you open your mouth, you will plead him to say it again. 

“What now you’re silent?” He scoffs and looks over at you, monitoring your face. You still don’t move, not even to scroll through more edits on your phone. The same sound playing over and over. He sees the way you tightly grasp the fabric of your joggers before bringing his eyes back to your face. 

“You liked that…didn’t you?” He quizzes, inching closer to you on the sofa. He places one hand on the arm-rest and the other rests near the back of your head; caging you in. When you don’t respond, he gently grabs a hold of your chin with his fingers. 

“I asked you a question. Or are you too stupid to rack your brain to think of anything other than being used for your body?” He whispers.

You just came. Well you think you just did. If you didn’t, you are surely on your way. 

“…No.” You meekly respond. 

He laughs softly, pulling away and moving to his side of the sofa again. 

“Oh okay. Was just making sure.” Seungmin says with a shit-eating grin. 

You furrow your eyebrows at this, looking at him quizzically. 

“What’s that supposed to mean? What do you mean you were just making sure? Making sure of what?” You ramble. 

Seungmin just hums, ignoring your array of questions. He busies himself with his phone, completely shutting you out. 

That incident happened on Monday, it is now Saturday. Something has shifted between the two of you, at least you think it has. 

It is not rare for the two of you to bash heads. It is usually you getting on Seungmin’s nerves and he always cusses you out for it. Except the way he has been doing it since Monday has been…interesting. 

It’s like he knows something about you. About the way you react to the way he raises his voice at you. The way he scoffs a laugh at you when you fail again at a level on the video game the two of you play. Or the way he downright disrespects you.

It’s stressing you out to say the least. When he acts cold and distant to you and then immediately blows up on you for even suggesting that he is acting weird. 

You decided to give him some space during the week to sort out whatever mood swing he was going through.

You are at his house now for ‘Sleepless Saturday’s’. This was a tradition between the two of you and his other two roommates Jeongin and Chris. 

First you all do some gaming, then you all stuff your faces with whatever food you want and now you begin the movie marathon. Luckily for you, it’s your turn to choose what everyone watches this Saturday. 

Due to the fact that Seungmin had been off with you all week, you decided that you were going to torture him with choosing a movie franchise that he particularly doesn’t like. 

It was only fair considering what he had put you through. You have never been so confusingly horny ever in your entire life. 

As the boys come into the room with drinks and snacks you hear a groan from Jeongin and Seungmin. Chris just snickers to himself as he sits down in his designated seat. 

“Right, who here pissed you off?” Jeongin says, looking at you before turning to the other guys.  “You know this only happens when you piss Y/n off! And I know for damn sure it wasn’t me so you better own up or I will make all of you watch the director’s cut of Lord of the Rings next Saturday.”

At that, all of your eyes go wide as you plead with Jeongin. Chris complaining at how he wasn’t the one to blame and Jeongin confirming that it couldn’t possibly have been him. 

All eyes fall to Seungmin who sits there snacking on some popcorn. He looks up to see eyes on him and he throws his hands in the air. 

“What are you looking at me for?” Seungmin groans. 

“If it wasn’t me or him, that only leaves you, genius.” Jeongin says, shaking his head at Seungmin. 

Seungmin’s mouth falls open as he struggles to get words out. He looks from them to you, to which you quickly divert your eyes to the television screen. 

“Dude, come on. Whatever you did to Y/n just apologise.” Chris says. 

You are trying to hide your smile by taking a sip of your drink. You can always trust Jeongin to up the ante. 

“I didn’t do anything!” Seungmin retorts. He keeps trying to catch your eye to have you side with him and convince them that they are just blowing this out of proportion, but you don’t give in so easily. 

“You clearly did if we are all watching the Twilight Saga tonight.”

“Alright guys let’s calm down. The longer we argue the longer it takes for me to see some sexy vampires and werewolves on the screen. Sit down, I’m pressing play.” You say, breaking it up. 

                         ──・──・・✿ ・・──・──

The start of the second film has begun and you can feel a pair of eyes on you. Subtly, you stretch and turn your head to confirm the suspicions. 

Seungmin stares at you with squinted eyes and you furrow your eyebrows in return. You almost miss it, but he points to the stairs before immediately getting up. 

The other boys don’t pay him any mind as they, though they complained, are entranced by the film. 

“Innie I’m cold, can I borrow a hoodie?” You ask.

“Yeah, just get one from my room.” He never pries his eyes away from the screen. “You know where. Just don’t—”

“Go in the second drawer yeah I know.” You say rolling your eyes and running up the stairs. 

Passing Jeongin’s room, you go straight into Seungmin’s. He sits on the bed with his head in his hands. 

“What?” You ask, folding your arms. He immediately stands up, walking past you to close his door. As he does, you get a whiff of his cologne and it smells delectable. 

You have barely been in close proximity to him the whole day let alone the whole week, afraid that he will just snap at you. 

“What the fuck Y/n?” He says in a hushed tone, careful not to be too loud. 

“What do you mean?”

“Why have you been acting so weird? You’ve been so on edge around me today and then you chose Twilight as the film’s for us to watch. I.N’s right, you only do that when you’re pissed off. Did I do something?” Seungmin says, genuinely worried. 

You fiddle with your fingers, trying to voice your feelings. 

“You’ve been acting so strange since Monday…”

“This again? Jesus Y/n what about Monday?” Seungmin says, now frustrated. 

You scoff and turn around. Trying to open the door to his room. It opens slightly before it gets slammed shut, his hand right by your head. 

“Y/n. You do not walk away from me when I’m trying to have a conversation with you. Especially when I don’t know what I’ve done.” Seungmin says quietly behind you. 

“Seungmin, this couldn't wait until tomorrow?” 

He drops his head and you can feel his breath tickle the back of your neck. 

“You’re killing me Y/n. Using my full name? Please just tell me. Tell me what I did.” He whispers against your ear. 

Your chest rises and falls heavily at the lack of distance between the two of you. You take a deep breath. 

“You were mean to me.”

He turns your body around so that you are facing him, his hands never break contact from holding you, his thumb stroking your arms softly. 

“Was I? What did I say?”

“You said that I was a slut.”

Seungmin stares at you before he breaks out into a smile. He covers his mouth and recomposes himself. 

“No I never. I said that you act like a slut. And was I wrong? No again. But you liked it didn’t you, sweetheart?”

Your mouth falls open. How has he flipped this back on you? 

“Don’t tempt me with your open mouth Y/n. You know I’d love to shut you up in a way I know you would like.” He caresses your cheek with his hand. 

“F-fuck you Seungmin.” You stammer, embarrassed. He just laughs at you, his bottom lip sticking out slightly as he tilts his head at you. 

“No you want me to? I bet you do. Wanna open those legs for me like the filthy little whore you are huh? Want me to fuck you like you crave? Like the needy little cumslut you are?” Seungmin says, his voice now in a low timbre. 

You hope the boys are so entranced that they can’t hear you become a moaning mess for your best friend upstairs. 

It doesn’t help how he’s been calling you his dirty little plaything ever since he shoved his cock down your throat. Then pumped his fingers in and out of you as he sucked, licked and went to town on you with that dangerously long (and skilled) tongue of his. 

Now you find yourself with your legs draped over his shoulders as he shows no mercy with his hips as he thrusts in and out of you at full speed. 

“Yeah, take it slut. You’re not good for anything other than opening up those legs of yours. You just let anyone fuck you like this?” He lands a hard slap to your ass making you moan. “Huh? I asked you a question, you better fucking answer it.” He growls. 

“N-no. Never.” You mewl, your eyes rolling to the back of your head. 

You hear him laugh at you. The fucker is laughing at you as he takes you to pound town. 

“Never knew my best friend was so needy for cock. Yeah your fingers and your toys with your little fantasies of your crushes don’t do shit. You needed, no, wanted to feel like my own little sex doll didn’t you?” He says chuckling. 

He slows down, putting both of your ankles on his right shoulder as he presses your legs into your chest and grinds down, hitting you so unbelievably deep. That delicious spot inside getting stroked time and time again as he rolls his hips into you. 

The sweat off his forehead drips just below your eye, mixing with the tears that make their descent down the side of your cheek, wetting the side of your head. 

He is enjoying the way you react, the way you clench around him tightly every single time he degrades you. Caught up in the heat of it all, he licks a stripe of your tears, humming at the salty taste. 

Your mouth, open and panting for air, gets intruded by his tongue licking along your own before enclosing his mouth around yours, swallowing your moans. 

This is all so filthy. So vulgar. So good. 

The kiss is wet, sloppy and a mix of both of you breathing into each other’s mouths. He pulls away with your bottom lip between his teeth. He bit so hard he very nearly drew blood. The pain just mixes with the pleasure as you whine at the sensation to which he licks and soothes the bite marks that he’s created. 

He dips his head down, kissing, sucking and blowing cool air on your neck before speaking low in your ear.

“You’re such a dirty hole. My own personal—fuck, tight little hole for me to fill up. Aren’t you? Shit~”

“Min I can’t. Too much.” You say as your hands travel down his back, your nails scraping so hard it breaks the skin. 

“Yes you can. You can take it Y/n, come on. It’s what you were made for. You were made to be used, you can fucking take it.”

“Minnie m’gonna fucking come.” You cry out. 

He shakes his head. 

“No the fuck you’re not you dumb little hole. Ngh, you’re gonna make me come first. I’m first, then you can. Mkay?” Seungmin says, his voice betraying the authoritative demeanour he adopted as it cracks slightly; turning into a desperate whine. 

You try to be good for him, holding the coil that threatens to burst any minute now. 

“Fuck I’m coming. Shit Y/n, I’m coming.” He says, his hands roughly gripping the pillow beside your head as he unloads into you. 

“Please, please, please!” You whine, rocking your hips to chase your own release. 

Knowing you’re about to snap, he moves one of his hands between your thighs, stimulating you at your core whilst trying his hardest to fuck you through your orgasm. 

You swear you’ve never come this hard. Let alone this much. Your legs are uncontrollably shaking. You milk him dry and he makes sure you ride out your high for as long as possible before he collapses half on you, half on the bed. 

You try to catch your breath, but it is proving difficult. 

“Y/n take a deep breath for me sweetheart.” Seungmin says, catching his own breath as he strokes your forehead as places gentle kisses to your eyelids and cheeks. 

You take three deep breaths and are able to regulate your breathing to soft pants now. 

He pulls out of you, moaning at the loss of warmth, but also at the mess that spills out of you. He moves down the bed, cleaning you up. Eagerly lapping up the result of both of your climaxes. 

You don’t think you can take anymore of the overstimulation and you weakly push his head away to which he laughs that sexy laugh of his again. 

“Okay okay, m’sorry you just taste too good.” He crawls back up the bed and lays beside you, holding you in his arms. 

He doesn’t even think he has gone as intense as he did just then and he doesn’t think you have either. 

He makes sure to just hold you, swaying you lightly as he kisses you on the side of your head. He looks at his bedside table saying an internal thanks as he sees his water bottle is full. 

He takes it and holds it to your mouth. 

“Y/n I need you to drink this for me okay. Open your mouth darling. There we go, slowly, not too fast.” Seungmin soothes as he helps you drink. 

Once you’ve had at least a quarter he stops for a bit. Telling you just how good you were for him and that he’s so proud of you. He rubs between your thighs, not even to get you going again, just to soothe the ache. 

“I’m not letting you have sex with anybody like that other than me.” He says and you both laugh. Though he is completely serious. After that you simply cannot even think about any of your celebrity crushes because you just know he has ruined you for them. Even if they were just a fantasy. 

After, and only after you had finished the bottle of water, were you allowed to let him clean you up properly. When you got the strength to get up, you tried to make yourself look like you weren’t just fucked into oblivion as you hobble down the stairs with Seungmin. 

That was your, amongst many, mistake. 

Jeongin and Chris look appalled. You see Chris shaking his head whilst Jeongin jumps up from his seat, actually looking like he could hurt the both of you. 

“What, and I can not stress this enough, the FUCK!” Jeongin yells. 

“No way you were clapping cheeks when we had to sit here and watch two whole Twilight movies. No way.” Chris mumbles to himself. 

“What do you mean?” Seungmin says shrugging and acting confused.  

You think you actually saw the string of sanity that was holding Jeongin together snap as he lunges for Seungmin. Whilst Chris on the other hand shakes his head at you like a disappointed mother. 

Through Seungmin’s screams and Chris’ ‘Mate yous are nasty’, it’s safe to say that you and Seungmin deserve to sit through the director’s cut of Lord of the Rings at least three times to make up for tonight!

jeongin | oral fixation | 3k (3009) words

You stretch, releasing a small yawn from beside Jeongin before placing the knuckle of your finger between your teeth as you concentrate on scrolling through your laptop. 

Jeongin was texting on his phone, humming a simple tune. However, the sound of a wrapper unfolding and being squished up into a ball caught his attention. 

He watches as you place the lollipop between your lips. This is the third one today. 

One of the boys in the group chat sent a video of what they’re currently doing. Jeongin knows that you think all of his friends are attractive. Which he likes to pretend doesn’t bother him, but deep down it makes his right eye twitch a little bit.

Yet being the good friend he is, he turns the phone and shows you, lightly nudging your arm with his elbow. 

You watch as Minho lifts a spoon to his lips, his tongue darting out to catch the contents dripping from the spoon before he puts it in his mouth and moans. 

“How does he make eating soup look so fucking hot.” You say with your lollipop tucked away in the side of your cheek. 

“He doesn’t. He’s just being annoying.” Jeongin says distastefully. 

You lean over him, grabbing the white stick of your sweet treat between your fingers as you press play on the video again. 

Jeongin watches you as you become strangely enraptured by the video. When Minho catches the liquid with his tongue, he sees you watching intently, the lollipop slowly making itself comfortable back in its designated place. 

As the video ends for the third time, you are now quiet as you occupy your mind with something Jeongin knows not. 

The way you so seamlessly move back into your previous state of shopping on your laptop made Jeongin squint his eyes. 

It always did make him wonder why you would always adorn a sweet suckle between your lips. Always a lollipop, a hard candy or just an ice cream. Anything that could keep your mouth busy, you made sure to have. 

But it was only with him you did it. He never questioned it until now, when things started to click into place. 

“Innie are you even listening to me?” You say waving your hand in front of his face. He blinks a couple of times, taking account of the sweet treat in your hand. 

“What?”

“I said what pair of shoes should I get? I have loads of black, barely any white and little to no coloured ones. What are we feeling?” You say turning your laptop to face him. 

He looks at the choices of shoes you have presented in front of him. He never has been good with masking the expressions on his face; this time it shows one of disgust. 

You catch the expression quickly and you groan.

“You hate them all. You know what, forget this. I’m just gonna continue to wear the shoes I already have.” You say placing the lollipop in your mouth and turning the laptop back to your eyes only. 

Curiosity bested Jeongin as he looked at you with questioning eyes. 

“Why do you always have something in your mouth?”

You look at him with a raised eyebrow, taking the lollipop out of your mouth. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Like, for the past month, every time we hang out, you’re always eating.”

He realised he hadn’t quite worded that correctly as you squint at him. Though before you could press further he held his hands out, quick with an explanation. 

“No, not like that. I mean you always have a sweet or an ice cream. Why?”

You shrug, scrolling through a new clothing website you found. 

“I dunno, soothing I guess.”

“I can’t imagine it’s good for your teeth.” Jeongin says as he grabs the remote to the television. 

“We’re all gonna die anyways, what does it matter if it’s not good for my teeth.” He rolls his eyes at your logic, though he continues to browse through Youtube. 

“Just because we’re all gonna die, doesn't mean you have to speed up the process.”

You huff out a laugh, shaking your head. 

“I don’t think I’m going to die anytime soon from a few cavities Innie.”

He turns to look at you, momentarily peering over at your laptop screen. 

“I don’t know, I just feel like you should find other alternatives. You have good teeth, I’d hate to see them all withered away by the time we’re like forty.”

You turn to him and purposefully crunch down on your lollipop. 

“May I ask what made you decide to hone in on my habits? ‘Cause it seems you care very much for the health of my molars.” You taunt. 

“I…I don’t know. Was just curious I guess, whatever. What do you wanna watch?” 

                         ──・──・・✿ ・・──・──

Strange. From that day onwards , every single time you would hang out with Jeongin, he would notice that your mouth didn’t occupy a sweet treat. 

Perhaps he had gotten used to seeing your pretty lips moulded around something. Perhaps his mind would replace the sweet treat you were sucking for his dick. 

Gosh, no! He can not be thinking about you that way. Yet…the thought sends blood rushing straight to the core of his being. Not ideal with the warmth that the jacuzzi is providing and the sight of you in your bathing suit no less than a metre away. 

“You didn’t have a lollipop today.” He states as he plays with the bubbles that rise to the surface of the water. 

“I had a dream that I got really bad cavities and my teeth fell out. I’m not joking, it scared me so bad that I vowed to stop eating hard candies.” You exclaim. 

Jeongin bursts out laughing but you look at him with a deadpan face. 

“What was the joke? Because I fear I’m missing out.” You say crossing your arms and raising your eyebrow. 

At this, Jeongin stops laughing and rolls his eyes. 

“Oh come on, how do you expect me not to laugh at that?” He snickers. 

“It was a nightmare! I swear if I lose any teeth, I am going to gnaw on you with my gums until I make you bleed.” You say slinking further down into the jacuzzi. 

You’re brought out of your slump when Jeongin decides to playfully splash water at you. You get him back by splashing water directly in his face. His mouth was open from laughter and now he is choking on the water that he accidentally swallowed. 

He tries not to make a scene, but how could anybody possibly not when they are choking. Clutching the side of the jacuzzi he heaves and coughs. 

He feels the water move beside him and soon a hand patting him on his back quickly follows. 

“Alright tough guy, calm down.” You say patting and rubbing his back in small circles. 

This seemed to have helped him as now he turns back around and submerges himself in the water. But before his head went under, he could hear your giggles. 

Mischievousness graces Jeongin as he decides to grab your ankle under the water making you scream and grab ahold of his hair. 

He winces in pain as you pull him up and immediately start scolding him. 

Something about how if he does it again you will roundhouse kick him in the neck? He isn’t too sure as the water was still pouring out of his ears. 

“What’s got you so cranky as of late? You're having withdrawals from your sweet treats, huh?” Jeongin asks as he sits back down in the jacuzzi next to you. 

“No! Yes… I don’t know, I just feel so restless. Having something to suck just calmed my thoughts as weird as it sounds.” You voice frustratedly. 

Jeongin listens as you unload about how this weird obsession over needing something in your mouth has made it hard for you to focus if you don’t have something occupying your mouth. 

He says a silent prayer of forgiveness for what he is about to do. 

“You can always suck my fingers.” 

You look at him as if he just called you a hideous, vile creature. At least that’s the same look you gave him when he said that you were like ‘if cream cheese was a person.’

“You’re serious aren’t you?” He shrugs as if it’s no big deal. 

“It’s just me. I mean there are other things to suck.” You raise your eyebrow. “I’m joking.” He wasn’t joking. 

“But I can’t just suck your dry finger.”

“It’s not dry, see?” He holds up his hands as water cascades down his arm, “Perfectly wet, as all hands should be. Ignore that last part. I don't know what that meant.”

You chuckle softly at his nervousness. 

“I am not sucking hot tub water off of your finger Innie. Come, follow me.” You say as you get out, grabbing your towel. 

He follows quickly like a duckling following its mother as you lead him to the kitchen. You open it and get out a jar of honey. Turning to Jeongin with what you hold like a trophy, you stand there beaming and he can’t help but to swoon internally at how cute you are. 

“What about the tooth nightmare?” Jeongin quips. 

Your smile falls and you pout. 

Oh how he wants to kiss the pout off of your plump lips. 

“A little honey won’t hurt, like I said, I’m not sucking hot tub water off of your finger.” 

He watches as you dance around the kitchen, grabbing a teaspoon and taking a seat beside him on the island. 

As you scoop the teaspoon into the honey, he hears you mutter something along the lines of ‘I can’t believe I am doing this.’ 

You hold the spoon up to his mouth. 

“Have a little taste first, see if it’s nice.”

He squints playfully at you before his tongue pokes out of his mouth to taste the sweet substance. 

In the corner of his eye, he watches as your eyes bore into his lips. Being a tease, he licks them, just so he can witness that wonderful reaction in which you hitch your breath and then pretend you weren’t staring directly at his mouth. 

“Sweet as ever,” He swipes his index finger across the spoon and holds his finger up and makes a come hither motion. “Come taste for yourself.” 

You place the spoon on the island before leaning forwards to try and capture his finger. 

He moves his hand towards him, making you nearly fall off the stool. He chuckles deeply, his hand going to your thigh to steady you. 

“Come on, I said come and taste for yourself.” He teases. 

You sit back, your eyes momentarily looking at his smirk before it falls back to his finger. The honey glistens in the light, a trail making its descent down his finger as if it’s racing away to save its life. 

You grab his wrist, taking him by surprise, but he tsks at you. 

Ignoring his disapproval at your impatience, you slowly lick the trail of honey that was trying to escape. Your tongue ascends to the tip before your lips enclose around his finger. 

You close your eyes, relishing in the dulcet taste as you suck all of it off. 

The sight of you, his best friend, sat here in your bathing suit: damp, is making his head go berserk. He is trying to fight the violent urge to moan out loud at this sudden turn of events. 

What causes his swimming trunks to tighten is the moan you release around his finger at the taste. You had to have done that on purpose you little tease. 

Once sated, you release his finger with a pop. Looking up at him with a wide smile and a bat of your eyelashes, he swears he’s being hypnotised. 

This act alone has made an indelible impact on the relationship between the two of you. It would be a waste if he didn’t take this opportunity whilst it is still arising. 

And it certainly was an opportunity he would be an idiot to miss. Which is why it explains the way you two are situated on the sofa. Jeongin is sitting upright as your head rests on his thighs. Except your soft lips have moulded around his dick so nicely. 

You are cockwarming him. His suggestion considering he just couldn’t ignore the hard on he got from the way you sucked his finger earlier. 

Every now and then your cheeks would hollow or your tongue would swirl around the head or you would just take it upon yourself to bob your head up and down. 

“Y/n, being coy only gets you so far. You know what you’re doing, moving your tongue like that, shit. I thought you just wanted your mouth full hm?” He brings a hand down and starts to stroke the side of your head. 

You look up at him with those eyes and he can’t take it anymore. Not when you look as good and cute as you do right now. 

His hand that was stroking your head, grabs a fistful of your hair and uses it to tug and pull your head on and off his dick. 

Happily obliging, you start to pump him with your hand, twisting around the length. Your other hand focuses on playing with his balls, making him release a low moan. 

“Know you wanted this, huh baby? Yeah you did. You just wanted to have my fat cock on your tongue. Isn’t that right?” He says as his head lulls back. 

The film becomes a forgotten task as you drool and take him further down your throat. 

He pulls you off of him and you let out a small whine.

“What? Don’t whine. Do you already miss me in your pretty mouth?” He shakes his head. “I don’t want to come down your throat. Be good and let me fuck you right and I’ll let you suck my thumb yeah?” He says panting. 

You nod. 

“Need your words baby.”

“Yes, please fuck me Innie. Please let me have your thumb in my mouth, please.” You beg. 

He smiles and positions you so that you lay on your back. He lowers himself, kissing down the valley of your chest and down your stomach. His lips are soft as he kisses, licks and even sucks the skin down to your core. 

“It would be awfully rude of me to not taste how sweet you are before fucking you. You’d like that wouldn’t you? My mouth, my breath, my tongue.” He purrs. 

As he places open mouthed kisses around your core, you try to shut your legs but he opens them wider. His arms propped in a way where you can’t close them. 

Without warning, his mouth is on you. Wet, sloppy and warm as he devours you in your most sacred place of your body. 

“Just like that, Innie. Your fucking mouth, oh my~” You moan as your hands travel down to his hair, tugging on his roots. 

His tongue dances around your hole before entering it. The sensational feeling makes your back arch off of the sofa. 

He listened to your body, watched how it reacted to certain things he did. What sounds you made when he swirled his tongue. 

It wasn’t long before you came undone on him. That didn’t even seem to be what Jeongin had wanted to do most desperately, but he just had to taste you. 

You take a deep breath as he slips in. He goes slow at first, letting your body accommodate his size before he starts to lose his composure and fuck into you like a wild rabbit. 

Your moans are a symphony of pleasure and he loves nothing more than to listen to the sounds he is causing you to make. 

“Open your mouth pretty.” 

You do as you're told. He places his thumb in his mouth, wetting the pad before smearing some of it on your lips and shoving it into your awaiting mouth. 

You immediately start to suck on his thumb. His fingers rest on the side of your neck as his other hand resides on your hip. 

“You feel so good I don’t know if I can hold out. Look at you sucking my thumb like it’s my cock.” He says, his voice shaking. 

He continues to pump inside of you and you clench around him. He groans out and takes his thumb out your mouth and squeezes your cheeks together. 

“Squeeze me again darling and I’ll come.” Before you can speak, he closes the distance between the two of you and swallows your moans. 

Your tongues are certainly getting to know each other as you suck on it before you clench again making his hips falter and soon enough, filling you up. 

You follow suit not long after, reaching your high as you moan out his name and wrap your arms and legs around him. Trapping him as his arms give way and he falls on top of you. 

His head falls into the space between your head and your shoulder as he places soft kisses along your neck and collarbone. 

The hum of the television playing the movie the two of you paid no attention to plays as you both caught your breath and enjoy the silence between you. 

“You like mouths or something?” Jeongin breaks the silence. 

“Something like that. I like yours. Been dreaming of your lips on me since forever.” You say, your hands stroking down the crease in between his shoulder blades. 

“So fucking hot.” He lifts his head up and places a long, tender kiss to your lips. His hand caresses your side as he smiles down at you. 

“We need to restart the movie, don’t worry, I think I have some ice cream that we can eat.”

Since his suspicions were confirmed, Jeongin is sure to have a lot more fun with you!

ʚ hope you enjoyed ^.^ you can support me by liking, commenting  and reblogging! it is heavily appreciated ᵕ̈ ɞ

i do not permit my work to be translated or reposted in any way, thank you. 

© 2023 diddybok

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[ggrapeejuicee]

„Just… Pretend.”

summary: in which harry convinces you to spend your summer in cape cod with his parents as his ‘girlfriend.’ but everything is just pretend, your not actually his girlfriend and you never have wanted to be his girlfriend, you’ve never seen him as more than harry styles, the singer… but by the end of the summer will that change?

tropes (so far) : fake dating

part one

“It’s just for one weekend.” He pleaded, “Then you can go back to hating me. You never even have to talk to me again, I don’t care.”

You sigh, your head falling backwards with a groan. You did not want to do this at all, but he’d been persistently asking you for days.

“C’mon, please?”

You roll your eyes, “You’re on a date with a new girl every week, I’m sure any of them would be up for it.”

“I can’t just take anyone to my parent’s place.”

“Why not? Or how about you just tell them you’re not seeing anyone right now? They won’t care.”

“I just need you to come, alright? I’ll owe you one, I promise.”

“Why me? There’s a million other people you could take, besides I’ve already met your parents at a show, they’ll never believe we’re seeing each other.”

“And they really liked you!”

“There’ll be a ton of other people that they like too, Harry. Choose anyone else.”

“I can’t.” He sighs.

“You can.”

“I can’t.” He repeats.

You look at him with tired eyes, awaiting his explanation. You’d been over this a hundred times, you had no interest in pretending to be his girlfriend while he visited his parents over the summer.

“I already told them we’re together.” He says quietly, avoiding eye contact.

“What?” You scoff, “You’ve gotta be joking.”

“They just… They met you at the show, and they really did seem to like you, and they kept going on and on about how they want me to find someone who makes me happy and stuff and I shut them up by saying we’re together…”

“You’re unbelievable.” You say, annoyed.!

The fact he’d been telling his parents ridiculous lies without even telling you about it, when said lies actually involved you had pissed you off.

Harry’s parents were lovely, and a producer on his latest album you’d met them a couple times at shows- Especially during the LA residence where you and his parents sat through the concerts in a VIP booth. His mum was lovely, always smiling and knew every single lyric. She told you that she was in Harry’s 0.5% of top listeners on Spotify last year.

You thought that was cute.


You couldn’t relate though, 5 Seconds of Summer were your top Spotify artist- Harry could never find out about that.

“They’ve been asking for me to take you to the beach house for months-“

“Months?!” You interrupt, “How long have you been telling them we’re together?”

He shrugged, “Since the end of the Forum residency?”

“Harry that was SIX months ago!” You yell, “I can’t pretend to be in a six month relationship with you, that’s ridiculous.”

He sits down on the couch, hugging a pillow.

“Yes you can. You practically know everything about me already. We spent every day of the tour together.”

“Everything about you in a career aspect.”

“Everything in general.” Harry corrects, “Sometimes I think you know more about me than I do.”

“I don’t. You’re just saying this because you’re convincing yourself that this ridiculous idea will actually work.”

“Name my first pet.”

“What?” You question. He was being stupid. There is no way you’d ever be able to spend two weeks with his parents over the summer, it was never going to work. It was a recipe for disaster.

“C’mon. You know the answer.”

He just kept staring at you. He wasn’t giving up. The longer you stayed silent the more intense his stare got. When he began to raise his eyebrows you’d given up.

“Max.” You mutter quietly, unimpressed with this whole game he was playing.

“And what am I allergic to?”

“Marshmallows, but you eat them anyway.”

Harry was grinning, and it was pissing you off. He was winning and he knew it.

“My favourite Christmas song?”

You rolled your eyes, “Christmas lights by Coldplay, but you tell everyone that it’s Merry Christmas Everyone because it’s a classic.”

Harry was giving you a ‘I told you so’ look. He wasn’t going to quit until you agreed to pretend to be his girlfriend.

You sigh softly, “Even if I agree to this… It could he really damaging for my career.”

“No one will find out.” His face was more serious now, and you could tell from the way he was looking at you that he meant it, “I’ll make sure of that.”

“But if if does-”

“It won’t.”

“But if it does, because there’s always a chance no matter what you think, then everyone will only think I got hired to tour manage because we’re ‘sleeping together.’” You say, using air quotes, just to further elaborate that this was all fake.

Harry had already got his grammy, he was at the peak of his career he’d be fine no matter what happened. But you were a female music producer in a male dominated industry, if people think you were only hired for this album because you’re fucking the singer- your career was over.

“If people find out I’ll kill you.”

“Does this mean you’re gonna agree?”

You nod, reluctantly.

“Thank you!” He jumps out of his chair, “I swear I’ll make it up to you, thank you so much.”

— — —

If you were in Harry’s position you’d be vigilant of everything, everyone, everywhere. You’d be paranoid of someone jumping through your bedroom window while you were asleep. But Harry was oddly calm. Maybe he was just like that. His lips were formed almost in a smile while he slept, and his eyes were moving under his eyelids- probably from a dream he was having. He wasn’t calm very often- recently he’d been very on edge and anxious about everything, it was nice to see him look so peaceful. You hoped for that sort of peace someday soon.

You had been in the studio going on six hours, and when he’d taken a break from recording so you could go over the tracks he’d managed to fall asleep in that short period of time.

You let him sleep while you packed up the equipment, putting things back into their assigned places, and didn’t bother waking him up until you were 100% ready to go.

“Harry,” You said softly, shaking his shoulder lightly, “Harry we gotta go.”

His eyes opened and he blinked a few times to adjust himself to the light.

“Huh?”

“We only had the studio booked until six, we gotta go.”

“Oh,” He sat up, stretching his arms and cracking his neck that had went into a cramp, “Sorry, don’t even remember falling asleep to be honest.”

“Don’t worry about it,” You shrug, “We got enough done today anyways. You deserve a rest.”

There were only three days left until the day Harry had said you were leaving for his parents place, and you had skipped over the subject every time he’d tried to bring it up. You didn’t really want to think about it because you were dreading it so badly.

“I’ll give you a ride home.” Harry said as you left the studio building.

“No, it’s alright.” You say, “I’ll just get an Uber.”

Harry glared at you, “Y/N, just get in the car.”

You glare back. But it had been a long day so getting a free lift wasn’t so bad.

“So.” He said, starting the car. “We gotta go over some things.”

“About the album?” You play dumb.

“… No.” He rolls his eyes, “Stop pretending you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

“I’m not pretending.”

“Love, you gotta tell me some stuff about you. My parents are gonna ask me shit and I don’t have a clue what to tell them.”

You groan. You should’ve stuck to your gut and got an Uber.

“Like what.”

He shrugs, “What’s your favourite colour?”

“Purple.” You reply.

“Mines is blue.”

“I know,” You reply.

“What’s your favourite song?” He asked.

You laughed to yourself a little.

“Jet black heart,” You grin, knowing you’d get some sort of reaction out of this answer, “By 5 Seconds of Summer.”

“5 Seconds of Summer?�� Harry scoffs, “They’re punks!”

You roll their eyes, “They turned to pop music and half of them are married, they’re hardly punks.”

“You know one of them dated my sister, right?” Harry groaned.

“Yep,” You grin, “And wrote a banging tune about it as well.”

“Don’t remind me.” He muttered.

“Look, you asked me a question and I gave you an honest answer. You can’t complain.”

“I know, I know.” Harry said, “You got any exes?”

You raise your eyebrows, “What?”

“This is the kind of stuff I need to know! Like I dunno if I’m your first boyfriend and all that.”

“Harry… I’m 24 years old. You’re not my first boyfriend.”

You said it almost as if he was your boyfriend. It sent a chill down your spine. This was going to be a long few weeks.

“Good to know.” He said.

He dropped you off outside your apartment.

“I guess the next time I see you will be for when we’re leaving, yeah?”

You nod. There was no studio session booked until after his vacation to Cape Cod, where his families beach house was, so he was right. The next time you see him would be at the airport.

“Flights at seven.” He says.

“Got it.”

The next few weeks were going to be hell.

part two coming soon…

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#harry styles x reader #harry styles au #harry styles angst #harry styles smut #harry styles one shot #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles #harry styles story #fake dating #fake dating trope #fake relationship

[seijorhi]

invidia ii

a (very belated) christmas present for my beloved wife @iwaasfairy who has, for two years straight, begged me for more shinnosuke content. i hope you like it bby! kuroo tetsurou x female reader, kuroo shinnosuke (oc) x female reader part i w.c 3.1k tw: noncon/dubcon, slight daddy kink, (forced) infidelity, yandere themes, nsfw, smut, age gap, i guess hints of breeding kink, dilf kuroo

“Why did your parents split up?”

Mid-way through pulling on a pair of old, grey sweatpants, mopping at beads of water from his shower still rolling down his bare chest, Shinnosuke throws you a curious look, but shrugs easily enough.

“They weren’t ever really ‘together’ to begin with. They tried the whole co-parenting thing to start with but mom… they never loved each other. Hell, I don’t even think they liked each other most of the time beyond–” he breaks off, his nose wrinkling in distaste. It almost makes you laugh. “Anyway, dad always said she had one foot out the door from the start. Dad was the one who stuck around to raise me.” There’s no animosity in his tone, he says it like it’s the simple truth. You’ve never met the woman, never having shown up to any of the Nekoma games, his graduation, any of it. You’ve seen a picture or two, overheard the odd phone call, but for as long as you’ve known him, the only real parent in Shin’s life has always been his dad.

If there’s anyone he idolises, it’s his father.

 Which is why the words that he says next – casting aside the damp towel in the general direction of the laundry basket (boys) and sauntering on over to join you in bed – take you entirely by surprise. “We’ll go visit her in Golden Week. I want her to meet you.”

And again, the words are just that; words. Shin kisses you, a sweet peck on your lips, and wastes no time in scooping you back into his arms and settling back with a contented sigh. They’re just words, but there’s this look in his eyes when he says it that makes you think he means something more. 

Your stomach flutters.

—

‘You really wanna break his heart like that, kitten?’

—

“Still not feeling any better?” Shin asks, brushing your hair back to feel your forehead. The beginnings of a frown start to take shape, teeth gently burrowing into his bottom lip, but he straightens and sighs, and that hint of discontent smoothes over like it had never existed in the first place. He strokes your hair again and offers a small, sympathetic smile. “No temperature, that’s gotta be a good sign, right?”

You’re a coward.

“It’s not my head, I just…” don’t have any visible, plausible symptoms for the fake illness that’s currently keeping you curled up in Shin’s bed. Away from the creep who’d smiled and fucking winked at you Christmas morning. “I just feel off.”

“Poor baby,” he coos, laughing when your face screws up and you swat at him.

Right now, swaddled in his hoodie, his fingers carding through your hair and that stupid, impish, almost believable grin beaming down at you, you want to forget. To pretend. 

Because there’s a pit in your stomach. A bitter, gnarled, seething mass. This moment right now, in Shin’s bed, it’s like glass, paper thin and already cracked, it can’t possibly last, and yet you’re clinging to it so desperately, head buried in the sand, willing yourself to pretend, from one heartbeat to the next, that what’s happened won’t break the two of you. 

That your stomach doesn’t threaten to upend when you catch sight of those hazel eyes peering down at you – the same shape and shade as his father’s.

You shudder out a breath, and what little levity there was between you two gets sucked out with it. Shin’s expression gutters.

Yeah. 

His fingers don’t leave your hair, though. Playing idly with the strands as though the suffocating tension in the room doesn’t exist at all. “Dad’s taking us out to dinner tonight,” he tells you. Reminds you, because you knew all of this beforehand. Everything but the party. “Do you want me to run by the pharmacy to get you something?”

Another tap at the fractured glass. 

That’s Shinnosuke all over, isn’t it? You might’ve been the manager back in the day, but it was always Shin who kept an eye on his team, on you, to make sure everyone was good. 

“No,” you shake your head. “I’ll–” the words get stuck in your throat. “I’ll see how I feel in an hour or so. ‘m still a little tired.” 

“You want some tea, sweetheart?”

‘Shh, sweetheart, you gotta keep it down.’

A cold sweat breaks out on the nape of your neck. No. No, no, no, no–

“Baby?”

You flinch like he’s slapped you, jerking away from the hand he’s wound in your hair. The startled look he shoots you borders on wounded, but you’re already squirming towards the edge of the bed, stumbling to your feet like a newborn foal. “Bathroom,” you manage to eke out, your voice sounding far too strangled and hoarse to pass as anywhere near the realm of fine. 

Shin doesn’t follow, doesn’t so much as utter a word – all kicked puppy confused – as you throw the door closed behind you and collapse back against it, a sweaty, ashen mess. 

He usually calls you love. Baby. Princess when he’s being a little shit. 

Sweetheart’s a rare one. 

Your heart races, a runaway train pounding in your chest. His eyes, his touch, sweetheart, sweetheart, sweetheart.

Another shuddering breath in. Out. 

Fuck. 

There’s a knock – not at the ensuite door, the sound’s too muffled for that, and you didn’t hear Shin’s footsteps (though you’re not sure you would, over the pounding in your ribs) meaning that the knocking’s at his door. 

There’s only one other occupant in the house. Though you try your damndest to fight it, there’s no stopping the wave of panic that stabs through you. Shin’s door creaks open, soft voices barely creeping through the gap in the door, and your fingers go rigid, nails clawing at the black and white flooring as though you can ground yourself by breaking through it instead. 

You don’t realise you’re crying.

Not until the droplets splatter on the tiles by your feet.

—

You should’ve left days ago.

After Christmas, when you’d ducked out from under Shin’s arm and lurched for the nearest bathroom, when it’d finally clicked for him that you violently hurling your guts up wasn’t the result of a simple hangover, you’d tried. Short of admitting the truth – and swinging a bat at the bees’ nest – convincing Shin to leave his dad’s place goes about as well as drawing blood from a stone. 

He’s even less thrilled about the prospect of you going back by yourself, leaving him to spend what’s left of the week with his dad like they’d planned.

There’s only so far you can push without breaking something. You, probably. You and Shin, almost definitely. 

Even so, you might’ve had more of a backbone if he hadn’t been so… Shin. All coaxing and concerned. Logical to a damn fault. 

‘You don’t wanna be stuck in a car driving for hours when you’re feeling shitty, love, and besides, dad’s place is bigger than ours. Comfier. You’ll probably be on the mend by tomorrow anyway, so there’s no point in us heading back.’

If you weren’t trying to salvage what’s left, or maybe clinging to the idea that you can – and want to – then it would’ve been easier just to go.

You wouldn’t still be here, stuck in the house of the man who’d– who’d raped you.

You wouldn’t be avoiding your boyfriend’s eye.

You would’ve screamed the whole house down before Kuroo Tetsurou ever bent you over the kitchen counter.

But the gentle extrication in the early hours of the morning, Shinnosuke’s lips brushing against your cheek, the sleepy rasp of his voice as he mumbles a quiet, “Love you,” before slipping away – you barely stir, cozy and safe and content.

He loves you. Shin loves you. 

A while later – minutes, maybe, or hours, it’s hard to tell when you’re still in the grips of sleep – the mattress dips under Shin’s weight, and those strong, sculpted arms seek your warmth again, you only sigh and lean back against him. 

“I love you,” you whisper, not yet willing to open your eyes and face another day of lying to him. 

The arm slung over your waist curls tighter, his face nuzzling into your neck. The kisses he leaves there aren’t affectionate, exactly, they’re not gentle, when teeth catch, nipping sharply at your skin, only to be soothed by a lave of his tongue.

And the laugh that rumbles at your back – a shade off your boyfriend’s – is anything but nice. 

“Yeah? Fuck, you’re sweet in the morning.”

This time, you don’t hold back. You shriek, kicking out like a wild thing – or you would have, if Kuroo’s hand hadn’t clamped down on your mouth, if his weight hadn’t shifted so that rather than lying curled up behind you, he’s half on top of you, pinning you down to the mattress with a thigh lodged between yours. 

“Uh-uh-uh, we were doing so good, kitten. Don’t you wanna be daddy’s good girl?”

Your only answer is a ragged noise, torn from somewhere deep inside of you. He chuckles again, grinds against you, his cock a thick, unignorable presence pressed at your ass. There’s nothing but the thin cotton of your sleep shorts separating it from you, and from past experience, that barrier won’t do much to deter him for long.

Kuroo rolls you onto your back and slots himself nicely between your legs. Naked, you realise with a fresh stab of fear.

You scream the moment his palm leaves your lips to capture your wrists, scream for Shinnosuke – for anyone – so loudly that it feels like you’ll bleed for it. Let him come running, find you pinned and squirming, terrified beneath the man who raised him.

Let it be the final crack that obliterates everything. 

If Shin sees you like this, utterly petrified, on the verge of being raped again and still thinks it some kind of a betrayal, let him choke on it. You don’t care anymore, you just want someone to stop this. 

(Shin wouldn’t, would he?)

But Kuroo only snickers. Leans over to lick along the edge of your lashes, where hot, glistening tears are already spilling over, trickling down to disappear in your hairline. “Your boy’s not here, but we don’t have long ‘til he gets back. You’ll forgive me if we bypass the foreplay this morning, right, sweetheart?” You shudder, goosebumps prickling where his breath washes over you, and you squeeze your eyes shut and violently – pointlessly – shake your head. “We’ll have to save eating your pretty little cunt for next time.”

All too eager, he hungrily captures your lips again and yanks down your shorts, taking your panties along with them.

Christmas morning, you’d been shoved face down over the kitchen counter while he’d fucked you from behind. You’d give anything for that distance right now. At least then you hadn’t had to endure his suffocating warmth, having him squeeze and grope at your tits over your old, threadbare tee.

You wouldn’t have to writhe away from his mouth while he rucks your bare thighs up either side of his hips, dragging you closer.

Even with your eyes screwed tightly shut, you can’t pretend that this isn’t happening as Kuroo spits and a heartbeat later the thick head of his cock slowly – agonisingly slowly – splits you apart.

You forget how to breathe. 

Eyes popping open and back arching up into his chest, your fists clutch desperately at the sheets of Shin’s bed, trying to squirm away, only the grip he has on you makes sure there’s nowhere for you to escape to. He’s big, long, mostly, and you’re too tight to take him easily, especially without any prep. The spit doesn’t help any, and Kuroo doesn’t care, groaning out in pleasure as inch by inch he pushes himself deeper, until at last he’s seated firmly inside of you. “Good fucking giiiirl,” he purrs, a kiss pressed to the tip of your nose.

A tiny, drawn out whine is all you can manage when your lower half radiates pain. 

“Gonna fuck this perfect pussy nice ‘n full,” he tells you. “Give you everything you need, sweet girl. You can take it. I know you can, you just gotta breathe for me.”

But unlike last time, he doesn’t allow you the luxury of a minute to adjust. His hips draw back and punch forward, jolting another mewling gasp from your lips. And again. And again. The pace isn’t violent so much as intense, like each thrust ignites something inside of him that burns for more.

He clasps your wrists in one hand, pants into your open mouth between frenetic kisses, groans out your name in that shuddering gasp.

“Mine,” he pants, beads of sweat dripping from his chest, his chin, rolling down onto you. “You’re daddy’s girl– fuck!”

Your cunt reacts accordingly, flexing around his cock, easing its passage so that the wet, lurid sounds of him fucking you quickly fill the air. A betrayal that has your cheeks flaming. 

The muscles in your thighs burn, Kuroo all but forcing them back towards the bed, his weight driving into you with fervour. A quick adjustment to the angle of your hip and his cock hits a spot deep inside of you that has you choking on a moan of your own, a burst of bright, sizzling pleasure bleeding through the pain.

Kuroo grins ferally at the sound of it. Drops his weight on an elbow and bucks into you, hitting it again. Your inner walls twitch, squeezing and slick, dragging noises from you that make you wanna burn with shame – that, or cut yourself loose entirely. You can’t muster resistance when he swallows them down, sucking on your tongue, moaning into your mouth. His momentum turns rabid, his hand no longer encircling your wrists, but entangled with them, pressing them down to the mattress. “Almost… there…” he grunts, gasping as he curls over you, abs flexing.

A shudder rolls through him, his hips faltering just as something vital shatters inside of you, toes curling, white hot pleasure exploding from your core, rippling through your whole body like the aftershocks of an earthquake. With your pussy spasming around his cock, your body taut and locked with pleasure, Kuroo hurtles off that cliff right alongside you, a strangled noise somewhere between a moan and a growl escaping him as he pumps your cunt full of his seed, all but collapsing atop of you afterwards.

It takes a minute before he peels himself off of you; pushing himself up, braced on elbow so that he’s not crushing you entirely, Kuroo waits, buried inside your warmth, for you to stop trembling with the after effects of your orgasm, for his cock to soften and both of your breathing to even out. 

Waits for those glazed over eyes to focus back on him and once again fill with tears, stroking a hand through your sweat-dampened hair as he does so.

“You should go take a shower before Shin gets home,” he says after a minute or two, his voice a low purr. “He can’t be far off.”

But aside from rolling off you to allow you up, Kuroo makes no moves to follow you, or so much as get up off the bed. Naked, his cock soft and glistening with your juices, one knee propped up, he watches you stumble like a newborn foal into the bathroom (only half managing to close the door behind you) with damn near predatory intent, a smirk teasing at his lips.

It’s where Shin finds you a short while later, curled up on the floor of the shower, shaking through silent sobs. 

—

Shin doesn’t let go of your hand the entire trip home.

Uncharacteristically sober, he says little aside from the occasional murmur to check in with you – always unanswered – and keeps you tucked close, as though a fraction of distance between you might pry you from his side entirely. 

The hours pass in a haze of… nothing. Your tears dry. Numbness takes over. You move like a robot, Shin guiding you every step of the way until you cross the threshold of your apartment.

He never asks what happened. You suppose the smell of sex in his bedroom and the bruises and love bites scattered over your body tell the tale well enough. Shinnosuke’s never been stupid. He’s not dense. 

He’s not heartless, either.

In the sanctity of your tiny, shitty bathroom, you shower again. A proper shower this time, with the water turned up full blast, scrubbing viciously at your skin– or at least, you do until he steps in and takes over. You’ve never thought of your boyfriend as particularly gentle, but he pries the loofah from your hand with a delicacy you didn’t know him capable of and takes care of you, cleaning you up with a tenderness that borders on reverence.

You pretend not to notice how his eyes (so like his, sharp and hazel) narrow into a scowl every time he spots another bruise, another mark left by his father. Once or twice his fingers begin to ghost over them, burgundy fingerprints on your thigh, a love bite sucked into the delicate skin above your collarbone, only to catch himself, swallowing tightly and resuming his task like he’d never faltered in the first place. 

When you’re done, he dries you both off and helps you into fresh clothes – a pair of comfy sweatpants and an old hoodie of his and guides you back to the living room, setting you down into his lap on the couch.

“I–” his voice is hoarse. Quiet, especially in the stillness of the apartment, and when you glance his way, he awkwardly clears his throat and takes a deep breath. “I went to the pharmacy. I thought– I thought…” he trails off again, dropping his gaze. “I’m such a fucking idiot.”

Your heart twists, and it’s your turn to comfort him. Or maybe you’re comforting each other, shifting slightly in his lap so that you can wrap your arms around him and draw him in close, burying your face in the crook of his neck and breathing in the fresh, clean scent of him. “No. I– it wasn’t…” but the words don’t come. You flounder. 

What are you supposed to say? It wasn’t his fault? Wasn’t yours?

You should’ve said something earlier? Should’ve fought back harder – against both of them, should’ve grown a spine?

A beat passes in the tense, thick silence, and when it becomes clear that you’ve got nothing for him, he makes an odd sort of huff that sounds almost irritated. You frown a little, but you don’t fight it when his arms pull tighter around you, when his cheek comes to a rest against your hair and his hands seek yours, curling around your wrists and stroking at the skin there. 

“We’ll get through this,” he vows. “I love you, this doesn’t change anything. It won’t change anything.” His lips meet the crown of your head in a soft kiss. “You’re mine. You’ll always be mine.”

#yandere haikyuu #yandere kuroo #yandere kuroo x reader #yandere kuroo tetsurou #yandere kuroo tetsurou x reader #oc: kuroo shinnosuke #tw: noncon

[har-rison-s]

counting on it | coryo snow x fem!reader

a/n: hello all... this is supposed to be a part 2 for fear or endearment, but i feel like rewriting that one so idk, this could as well be a stand-alone writing / one-shot with a possible continuation? idk though. happy reading <3

this is techincally part 2 of this little drabble

next chapter coryo masterlist

main masterlist

word count: 4k

themes: fluff

warnings: mention of bombs, idrk what else??

gif credit goes to owner <3

the phone in her room never rang, which meant only one thing – it wasn’t the usual mysery business calling. each time the house phone rang, however, it was like a heart attack for her. any incoming calls to her home were only to her parents to tell them about her making trouble at the Academy again, and again. so it was never a pleasant phone call.

but she knew it could only be Coryo calling now, so she picked up the phone with a lovey-dovey smile on her lips already. “yes?” she asked into the round microphone end of the device, squeezing it between her rosy cheek and her shoulder. 

“good evening,” coryo’s shaky voice said into the speaker, and it was so uptight that she giggled, “is this you or not?”

“i-it’s me, yes,” she confirmed with another giggle. he’s nervous around her still, and miserably so, and it’s coming out in the form of a very formal greeting, “but is this really you, coryo?”

“of course it’s me,” he said, now so sure of himself he was bleeding with it, “were you expecting someone else to call?”

“well, there’s the routine call from the Academy about me misbehaving that comes once or twice a week,” she answered, “no one other than that. why are you calling? i usually call you.”

she could hear him make a smile into his microphone, and she blushed at the thought of it, and his quiet chuckle that she heard, too. “i was thinking of you,” he admitted, and she raised her eyebrows. coryo being nervous one minute but then blunt the next really does a number on her. she wouldn’t believe he was such a nervous wreck around her by his looks, or by her own. he must be really... “if you’re free and not sleeping, i wanted to show you around grandma’am’s—well, our family’s—garden upstairs. o-only if you want to, of course, and if you’re free.”

she smiled again and shook her head. this cold boy was warming his way into her heart quicker than he was before. before they’d crossed that sacred line with the kiss in his empty kitchen. “yes, i’m free and not sleeping, and i would love to,” she said, “didn’t know you had an upstairs garden. i’ll be over in less than twenty minutes. do you need anything from my cooks?” 

she always looks out for him, doesn’t she? he hadn’t even thought of that aspect of their relationship. he’s only in total emotional turmoil and was missing her terribly. the bombing at the arena and then being in hospital, out for who knows how many days, robbed him of seeing her every day, like he usually would, which he’d grown used to. she would have visited him in the hospital, but apparently she was not permitted to – she guesses because of her trouble-making at school. her presence and the frequentness of it brought him comfort. he couldn’t think of anyone else at this time, not even Tigris could console or comfort him. not like y/n could. 

she got barely a good enough answer from Coryo, but packed a bag of sandwiches and pie nonetheless before departing in her driver’s car for Coryo’s apartment in the Corso. she knew he didn’t like charity, and wouldn’t be asking for food from her if it wasn’t absolutely the end of days. he also didn’t let anyone else from school but her see where he lived – and even about her, taking her upbringing and current wealth, he had doubts. with her unpredictable nature, he could never predict her reaction to seeing his home. and not knowing whether she’d run and belittle him at school or stay and still like him regardless was frustrating. because he could never have any control over her reactions, and that scared him. 

but she didn’t run away, nor belittle him, nor think less of him. a home is a home, and she knew how hard anything was to come by for the Snows. because her and Coryo had become friends over all their time spent together at school, even despite the vast difference in their personalities, they had this undoubtable connection, she had grown to care about him. therefore it was her idea, of course, to bring him any food she could from her mansion of a home where food was always excess. truth be told, Coryo had thought of the possibility of asking her, but he would never have let down his pride or let her see his vulnerable side. perhaps, until now. 

she was panting and heaving when she finally reached the floor of the Snows’ penthouse in the apartment building, which isn’t the ideal state to meet the boy of your fancies in, but seeing his welcoming smile made her feel at ease. she hardly came off to people as anything but frazzled, but Coryo has proved that it doesn’t matter to him, so she dares not worry. she smiled back wide, too, and doubles over for a few moments to catch her breath. 

Coryo paced over to her and put a hand on her arm, which made her look at him. “hey,” she said in a heavy breath and with a smile still on her lips, “i’m fine, really,” she said with a shake of her head. Coryo nodded and then shrugged.

“how improper of me, i should have gone down to walk you up,” he said, then, and they both chuckled.

“don’t worry your pretty head over it,” she said in response with a carefree throw of a hand, “just a shame the elevator doesn’t work.” Coryo nodded again at her statement, and y/n breathed one last sigh of heavy breath before really looking up at him. there was something different about him. most of all, his piercing blue eyes looked glassy, unlike their usual look- cold, convicted, confident, calm. all the characteristics she could match to Coryo himself. her eyebrows twitched slightly as she reached a hand out to his cheek, and upon touching it found him trembling. now that she looked at him closer, and he let her do that, she noticed his curls messy, out of their usual arrange, and his cheeks not as rosy as always, blueish rings under his eyes. something was troubling him, and she didn’t have to guess twice what. 

she kissed his lips quickly, feeling as though he might fall apart or spill his worried words out like a river if she didn’t. Coryo immediately sunk into her through the kiss, arms wrapping around her coat-covered waist so close he nearly started to lift her up and, really, with the mood he’s in, he might as well have. he was so desperate for her, so desperate to feel her close that it made himself nauseaus. he’d sworn off any romantic relations until he and his family had a better place to live, and the breaking of his own promise made him an enemy to himself. what was she doing to him?

but this felt so good with her, so good that he never wanted to let go of her, never wanted there to be a day in which he doesn’t get to see her if only for a few seconds. she was making him feel things he’d never felt before, things he couldn’t understand now. pulling away from her after giving her a searing hot kiss was torture, but he had to give them both air to breathe. “i missed you,” he admitted to her what he’d never admitted to anyone else before. y/n smiled and nodded, their foreheads touching, “i wanted to see you. i had to.”

“i know,” she nodded again, “i’m sorry i didn’t come to the hospital – i couldn’t.” she admitted with a gentle shake of her head, and suddenly she felt strongly overcome by emotion. “they wouldn’t let me in.” her hands rested on his neck, on his chest, she nearly made desparate gestures, as if he wasn’t in her hold or would be taken away any second. she’d missed him, too. Coryo furrowed his brow. they wouldn’t let her in? he looked into her eyes, and she nodded, her eyes sad, too, but not nearly as sad as his own. “my reputation as sort of a rebel and all.”

that word. poison to him. poison to the whole nation. her using it as a joke didn’t come off too strongly with comedy, and he wished she wouldn’t use it at all. “they were fools not to,” Coryo said amidst his inner disagreement, “you should have come with Tigris and Sejanus, they would have let you in then.”

“pretty hard to get hold of them when they don’t really know about us,” y/n pointed out the fact with half a smile on her face, hoping it wouldn’t stir the wrong nerve in the boy. but it didn’t. Coryo always knew the truth, just didn’t always act on it or deem it worth anything. what good was the truth if you could tell lies instead? he nodded at her and closed his eyes, “i only found out you’ve been hospitalised from the news. and the bombing – god, Coryo, that’s just...”

he made a firm shake of his head at her words and pressed a kiss to her cheek before taking her hand and leading her away from the stairwell. she just watched him as he pulled her through his door, knowing Coryo doesn’t like remembering the war days. they both experienced it, both had run-ins with bombs and many other traumatic war characteristics that they’d rather forget. Tigris and grandma’am were both asleep, so there were no worries about accidental run-ins with either of them, while y/n was still unintroduced to both. Coryo wanted to avoid an awkward situation right now as best he could.

Coryo led her to a door by their kitchen, which opened up to a stairwell, rather than a simple cupboard (what would they keep in there, anyway? the Snows had so little belongings to them and so little food to eat that there was hardly any excess anything in the apartment), and, himself going first and y/n following suit with her hand still in his, led them both up those stairs that looked older than his grandmother with no doubt. the breeze of the night welcomed them with sweeping arms as a cloud of red and white surrounded y/n’s vision.

a rooftop garden. the Snows were giving y/n’s family a run for their money with the beauty of this scooped-away little paradise. she gasped as she tried to take it all in, looking all around herself at all the roses – white and red – engulfing her and Coryo. there was scarcely anything else on the rooftop besides the roses, just a pair of old chairs, gardening tools and a watering can in one of the far corners. this was just unbelievable.

her hand covered her mouth as she looked at Coryo in shock and fascination. there was quite nothing like the beauty of so many roses, and the view this rooftop gave of the city. truth be told, the Capitol could look better – torn, burnt buildings, trash littered in the streets, hardly any plants growing anywhere, and it looked especially worse now in the night, scary even – but still, a panoramic view was a panoramic view. she clung to Coryo, arms around his waist as she all but blushed and gushed at the sight around them. “it’s breath-taking, Coryo,” she said finally, and he put an arm around her, smiling softly at her joy. he didn’t know another person’s smile could mean so much to him, and even warm him and make him feel better. 

“grandma’am’s pride and joy,” he said to her, overlooking the garden, too, and he walked them both further into it, away from the door – god forbid either of his sleeping family members woke up from their voices in the night. 

“i’ve been wondering where you got those roses you like to give me,” and the one for lucy gray, y/n said as she ran her hands over the beautiful, seemingly perfect white petals. no flaws on them, none visible, anyway. just like Coryo himself. she looked back to him, his hair seeming to glow in the dark of the night, and Coryo smiled at her with tightly closed lips, “god, it’s great here. i love this view,” she said and leaned on the edge of the stone balcony, her hands splayed on either side of her, stretching further away from her. Coryo took slow steps to approach her, and finally he dared to come up just behind her, arms wrapping around her waist again. she immediately leaned into him, locking her hands on his on her stomach. 

“it’s great for when i want to be alone, catch a break,” he said and sighed softly. her thumb gently grazed across the pearly white skin of his hands and her eyes slowed down in wonder. they usually jump around, never rest, but it’s different when she’s with him. he seems to ground her a little. 

“was tonight one of those nights?” she asked quietly and felt him nodding as he made a hum of confirmation. she turned around in his arms and looked up at him, hands on his chest. “i figured as much. you never call me yourself.” she said and made an airy chuckle, though Coryo’s lips barely lifted to make any kind of expression at all. “what is it?” he shook his head and made to kiss her again, dipping his head down, but she moved away. “you have to talk to me.” she said, with a firm hand on his cheek now, in case he attempted for her lips again. “you have no reason to hide from me, come on. and i wouldn’t tell anyone, you know that.” it’s her unavailing ability to always somehow make a half-hearted joke that Coryo likes about her, even though he wouldn’t let himself like that. 

but he found himself unable to say no to her. so he turned them around, him being the one who leans against the edge now, both of them holding onto each other still. he looked at her thin coat and the dress she’s wearing underneath, and he traced his hand up her arm just to ease himself. “the bombs were horrible,” he finally said in a quiet voice, “i was scared for Lucy Gray, too. but see, she saved my life.” Coryo said, and y/n could see he hated to admit it. that a district girl could do good. all this propaganda about district people being animals and monsters worked well on them as children, but now, as they’re growing up, they’re seeing some truth for themselves. even if the propaganda is hard to erase from their minds. “i’m in her debt for that. and i’m not sure i could ever repay her.”

“you could help and make her win the games,” y/n suggested, but with nods from Coryo she knows he already thought of that, of course.

“i don’t know if i can do that,” he said in a frail voice, “she said to help her i should start believing she actually could win, but... i don’t think she’s gonna make it,” Coryo admitted, “other tributes are better at fighting and stronger than her, she barely has a chance. which means she’ll probably be one of the first ones to get killed, and then i’ll lose the Plinth prize and the Snow name will go into ruin.” he jumped to conclusions quickly, as she has found that he usually does, and it made her sigh. she pulled him in for an embrace, her arms around his neck, forehead to forehead, her curls tickling her cheek. 

“i still can’t believe they let the games go on after the bombing,” she admitted quietly, “but that would be Capitol showing weakness, so of course they wouldn’t stop the games. but look,” she held his trembling face in her hands, trying to make him look at her, “you and Lucy Gray both have charm. as much as i’ve noticed, no one else does. and no one is as bonded to their tribute as you are. her song brought her a lot of donations, and you can work with that. she just has to hide out long enough and...”

“that’s where i stopped, too,” Coryo said and shook his head with a sigh again, “it was doomed from the start. Highbottom has something against me, i know he does. i got the last district, and i couldn’t help her – just as he wanted.”

“i still believe you can prove him wrong,” she argued back, convicted, “but as mentors, you are pretty helpless when the games start. it’s all up to the tributes themselves.”

Coryo looks up at her again, “i bet you would have made a great mentor,” he told her with that charming half-grin on his delicious lips that made her tilt her head at him in disbelief. 

“me?” she echoed and Coryo nodded. “please, you’re just saying that to get into my pants. i can’t even make people like me at school, much less make the whole nation like someone from the districts enough to support them in the arena.” she shook her head. “i would be a terrible mentor.” 

Coryo shook his head and pulled her closer to him again by her waist, her having taken a step back while talking. he had her attention now, she looked down at him again, with seemingly a question mark in her eyes. “i like you, and i’m from school,” he said as his hands slid up her back, his fingers so long and his palms so big he could cover just half her back with his hands. 

“yeah, but i didn’t make you like me. i didn’t even try and here we are,” she said dismissively and meant to pull away again before Coryo kissed her lips again. ah, so that’s what he was trying to say – she didn’t even need to try to get him to like her. there was no effort, there was just her usual self and he liked her for that. it still seemed hard to believe, though. “i like you, too, by the way,” she butted in again before returning a kiss and smiled at Coryo chuckling at her little joke. he spread his legs for her to get even closer, now standing between them and kissing his pink lips with one of her hands splayed on his cheek and the other carefully ghosting over his snow-white curls, not wanting to ruin them. 

but Coryo didn’t care, they were all dishevelled before they met up, anyway, and in this moment between them his own visual look didn’t matter that much to him. she was already kissing him, anyway, he’d won her over, so to say. and he was pulling her closer and closer to him with his hands roaming all about her back and her hips as their kisses grew more frequent, more hot, more messy. Coryo felt like his head was spinning, and he knew he was disobeying the doctor’s orders to rest and take everything easy with this. but he couldn’t help it. it was her.

he hoisted a leg of hers over his, surprising her and earning a gasp from her. which gave him the advantage to deepen the kiss with his tongue now poking at her own between their heated kisses, and he actually made her moan. it hummed so deliciously into his mouth and Coryo felt himself shudder because of it, his trousers tightening exponentially around his crotch. she was no longer afraid of ruining his perfect hair, she ran her hand through the soft curls and reached into his half-unbuttoned shirt with her other hand, skimming his perfectly-shaded naked skin with her careful hands. their kisses lost count and air ran out, but they just needed each other so much that they didn’t even notice. Coryo ran his hand across her up-hoisted thigh, even reaching under her dress, which made her hum against his lips again. “ungh, Coryo,” she mumbled into his burning mouth and grabbed onto his neck for support as he edged his hand higher and higher up her dress.

he might have reached near the spot where she had the most heat ignited for him, but her accidentally pressing her hand into a sensitive, wounded area on his back made him yelp out and jerk like he’d just been hit by live electricity. she immediately jumped off him and saw the hurt expression on his wincing face and felt guilty. a hand covered her mouth as the other one carefully reached out to him. Coryo took his shirt off and looked over his shoulder—though he could barely see that way—if any stitches had broken loose, and then exhaled sharply, suddenly sounding exhausted.

“Coryo, i’m so sorry,” she said in a hushed voice, still wary to touch him without his permission. he looked at her for a moment and then shook his head. she could see the pain was fading away by the expression on his face – the wince and cringe were slowly letting go of his facial muscles – but she still felt bad. 

“don’t be,” he told her in a hoarse voice, “i didn’t tell you about my injuries. you couldn’t have known,”

“but i still feel bad,” she said and came closer to him again, “i—i could take a look for you. maybe stitch you up, uh...” Coryo shook his head just as she took his hands in hers, and his head hang low again. “i’m sorry, let me fix it.”

he gave her a firm head shake again. “you don’t need to, i’ll go to a medic tomorrow,” he assured her and looked up into her bambi eyes again. she looked so pretty to him suddenly. well, of course, she always looks pretty and beautiful to him, it’s just her emotions right now that made her eyes look bigger and... he couldn’t put it into words.

“i could... stay over, if you don’t want to be alone. we could just talk or sleep, whatever,” she suggested with a naïve smile on her over-kissed lips, though already knowing that it’s probably going to be a “no” from him, knowing that the two of them were a pretty private item. if they were an item at all, of course. and, of course, Coryo shook his head.

“it’s late, you should be home,” he told her and gave a kiss to one of her hands, “besides,” he added, getting close to her again, nose to nose, “i’ll just get carried away with you again and then i’ll bleed all over you,” he said with a slight smile, and she appreciated the notion of a joke from him this time, instead of her. she giggled and her head dipped lower, his words – both dangerous, comedic and enticing – making her blush as if she was as young as twelve or thirteen and a boy had just flirted with her for the first time. Coryo kissed her temple and squeezed her hands. “you’re irresistible to me.”

she looked into his eyes and saw nothing but sincerity and lust as he said those words, so she believed him. she took a deep breath and made a small smile, that blush ever present in her cheeks. “as you are to me,” she said, “you could stay over sometime, though, at my place. i’d love for you to stay over,” she admitted quietly before she got ready to leave.

Coryo made a sheepish grin at her words and walked her back down the stairs and to the door of his penthouse. he took her close in his arms again for one more time before she had to leave and whispered in her ear, “i can’t promise i’ll be on my best behaviour with no one but you around.” he told her words that made her shiver and she just smiled wide as she stepped away from him.

before slipping out and through his door in the hour of creeping dawn, she said something very characteristic of herself, “i’ll be counting on it.” and with a kiss blown to Coryo, she was out and on her way home.

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#har-rison-s work #har-rison-s writes #coryolanus snow #coryo snow x reader #coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus x you #coriolanus snow

[blackopals-world]

Your Implied relationship Twisted Wonderland fic was so good please have a part two where the bys come back to visit and find out she has a son. Also her son finds out she´s the missing princess in the books she wrote. This is SO GOOD O MY GREAT 7 PLEASE PART 2! PART 2!

Okay Okay! I'm listening!I'm listening!

I Found Home

Part 2

(part 1)(part 3)(Part 4)(part 5)(Part 6)(Part 7)(Part 8)

Implied relationship

Yuu x twisted cast

Implied relationship in the first half.

Yuu opens the door to find...

Yuu took a deep breath as she opened to door hoping that she heard correctly. She knew that voice anywhere.

"Henchmen!" A ball of grey fluff barreled into her.

"Grim?!" She gasped as the air was pushed out of her lungs.

She had to be dreaming.

What a cruel dream this was. To see her Grim again would mean crossing over to that world but leaving her Grimm behind. How cruel, how impossible.

"Yuu!" The cat cried rubbing his furry form against her in affection. Every so often headbutting against her face.

"Oh Grim." She sighed tearfully wrapping her arms around him " How did you get here?"

The cat familiar pulled away and smiled smugly.

"Obviously, you can never leave me behind. The great and powerful Grim created portals to countless domains." He proclaimed.

"By which he means we created a portal to find you." Another voice entered.

The feathered cloak and bird mask told her everything she needed.

"Crowley." Yuu gasped.

Once upon a time, she hated his guts but in time she understood him. In the years of staying at the school she saw a side of him that others didn't. He was negligent and overdramatic but he protected her in his own way.

Crowley was true to his word about searching for a way back home for her, but he pushed her to stay. He had doubts as his research found little evidence. Not to mention the chaos going on campus. Grim and Yuu's antics didn't help certainly. Back then she thought it was revenge but it only made things harder.

During her last year asked her to remain in twisted wonderland because it would be easier than readjusting to her old world.

She saw through him. He just didn't want her to go. But a promise was made.

"Look how you've grown," Crowley said wistfully as he moved his mask. "Hard to believe it's only been a few years."

Yuu held back a laugh as she saw him. A few streaks of graying hair stood out from the black. His eyes seemed to wrinkle with the beginning of crow's feet. His job must be aging him prematurely. He definitely seemed more tired. Best not to make fun of an old man.

"Nice to see you too." Yuu said

Their reunion halted when footsteps came stumbling down the stairs. Grimm had woken up and came looking for her.

"Mama.." He called out to her rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Mama."

Yuu couldn't speak as her son saw the strange figures in the house.

"Mama?" Grim repeated astonished, bewildered as he looked back and forth between the parent and child.

"Nina?" Grimm asked.

Answering Grimm's questions this late would be difficult without any prep. So she took the easy way.

"Honey your sleepwalking. You should get back to bed." Yuu thanked the heavens that Grim looked like a walking stuff animal.

Grimm nodded and yawn before stumbling back to his room.

"I have a grandson?!" Crowley gasped "Wait your married?!"

"Of course not, I'm too young an-" Yuu started.

"But not too young for a baby? Do you not remember what I said about protection? Who fathered your child? Who was this bastard who left you to raise this child on your own?"

"It's not like that."

"Was it one of your old 'friends'? Even if you left for your old world it doesn't absolve them of responsibility. Regardless now that the gate is open there will be no choice but to be a father to their child. Divus will have fit when he finds out." Crowley ranted taking a seat on the couch as Yuu tried to calm him down.

"No , I adopted Grimm. He's not related to them."

Crowley wasn't hearing it.

"Honestly when that boy asked for me and Crewel's blessing I knew we were right to say no. And don't lie young lady that child looks exactly like-"

"No, he doesn't!"

They argued back and forth as Grim snuck upstairs through the open door to the room that the little boy slept in.

The room was decorated wall to wall with trinkets, stuffies, and books. On the bed, the boy slept hugging a grey cat with a bow.

Grim shifted closer to examine it when a pair of eyes popped open.

"Nina?" There was that name again "You came to life!"

"My name is Grim, boy. The great and powerful magician!" Grim crowed.

"No, I'm Grimm. That's my name."

Grim paused. Yuu named him Grimm. After him. She didn't forget him. Did she love him that much?

"That's. That's a great name." He said simply as he climbed on the bed "You should sleep. Your mom has always been a stickler for stuff like that."

The familiar curled up against the boy and purred as he lulled them to sleep. Grim could accept this, his new 'little henchmen'.

Meanwhile, Yuu continued to bicker with her old guardian. Crowley wanted visitation rights, family vacations and a chance to see if his grandson might have magic. To which Yuu said no.

Grimm wouldn't be exposed to magic. Not the expectations that came with it or the people who use it. It's not a world made for him. Grimm had been through enough, he has his own trauma and she wasn't making magic part of it.

"I'm not sure you'll get a choice. Not with the gate now open."

"Grimm doesn't have magic. I won't let him be treated the way I was for it. He deserves better."

"Mama!Mama!" Grim shouted as he stumbled down the big steps. He clung to the railing with both arms to safely.

Yuu finished had cutting up Grim's pancakes as he made it down and ran straight to her. He threw himself at her as his arms wrapped around her hips.

"Careful, sweetheart. You almost knocked me over." Yuu picked him up and sat him at the table. Grimm's seat had a cushion to make it easier to see over the table.

"Cake! Thank you mama!" He smiled picking up his fork from his colorful placemat.

Yuu held back a squeal of joy. Her baby was so so cute and so polite.

"No, they are pancakes. We change the name to make it okay to eat in the morning.

"Cake is cake!" Grimm hooted back.

Yuu didn't argue.

"Mama, I had a dream. Nina was walking and talking!"

"Oh," Yuu said not having a better response.

She had a lot on her mind. The sudden appearance of Grim and Crowley disrupted Yuu's life. She was happy to see them but...it's a lot to adjust too.

She didn't even like the idea of Grimm learning about magic. She had dealt with her own resentment in the past when she was mocked for her status. It would be unfair to make him go through the same. She's a mother now and had to consider these things.

Maybe she was making a mistake.

Grim at least got to meet his little brother. It's too bad he needed to return with Crowley for the time being. Once Yuu was sure they would be a family again. Grim will always be the exception no matter her doubts.

(From this point the story goes on to show the first meetings with the twst boys. Each will be Grimm's first contact so there won't be continuity)

Riddle

"The Mentor"

No one believed Grim when he said he made a stable gateway to Yuu's world. All of them had tried and failed even Malleus couldn't do it. But Grim was different he had a connection to Yuu. If Yuu still had a strong connection a gateway could be made.

Grim now worked at the school helping Crowley and called everyone to deliver the news.

Riddle thought it would be appropriate to visit. He took the day off, his cases would wait one day. He had worked his way up to district prosecutor recently.

The first thing he noticed when he reached the scenic neighborhood was how peaceful it was. The house were spaced apart and it was clean. Lots of trees and gardens.

The second was one particular house where a young woman was kneading by a flowerbed. She was so focused on her roses that she didn't notice him but Riddle knew it was her. Just like him, time had changed some features. He had grown taller and lost some of his boyish looks but she no different. She was softer in appearance, glowing and matronly even. She grew out her hair but she tied it up.

Riddle reflexively straightened his suit jacket and shifted the bouquet he had brought in his arms. He wondered if she still liked these flowers.

Just as he tried to call her name a loud yelp rang out.

"Ma-ahh!" The exclamation became a wail of pain as a little boy appeared holding out a finger.

Yuu sprang up as she went to the side of a weeping boy. He had pricked his finger on a thorn.

"It okay Grimm. Don't panic, it'll only hurt a moment. You should never touch roses without gloves." She scolded gently. "You know better then that."

"But I wanted to see a red rose. So I thought if I painted one it would turn red. Like in the book." He whimpered as Yuu took out a bandage from her pocket and wrapped it on his finger.

"Grimm you know that in the story that red roses belong to the red king. And that sort of spell was done only by his loyal card soldiers." She admonished.

"Like The Ace Magician and The Spade Mercenary?" He asked.

"Yep, they had orders to do those tasks and you should ask permission to do it as well. Those are the rules. Don't you want to follow the rules?" Yuu asked.

Grim nodded quickly as he gathered his scattered paint and went to put them away like a good boy.

Riddle had hidden himself during the exchange. His mind raced. She had a son. Of course, she had a kid. Why wouldn't she? Anyone with eyes would want her. Anyone with a brain would fall for her. So seeing her married with a family is common sense.

Perhaps the flowers were too much?

"Hello?"

Riddle didn't get time to change his mind as his hiding spot was discovered.

"Hello, Yuu. I brought these for you." He tried to sound calm as he presented the bouquet.

"Riddle!" Her smile was still as warm as it was before. "Oh my, look at how tall you've gotten! You look amazing! How have you been? Come inside, I'll make some tea."

The pair talked amicably as Yuu put a kettle on. All the while a pair of eyes peeked out from a doorway. It was the boy.

"Grimm it's rude to stare. " She scolded.

"Sorry mama." He said but didn't move.

"Grimm? I bet you had to explain that one to your husband." Riddle tried to sound jovial.

"Not really, I don't have one. It just us here." Yuu smiled.

"I'm sorry."

"I'm not."

There was a tug on Riddle's sleeve as Grimm got his attention. In his hand was a book; "The Lost Princess in the Red King's Court"

"Oh, do you like this book? I never read stuff like this at your age." Riddle said taking the book gingerly. He flipped through the pages as the pictures looked eerily familiar.

Grimm leaned on Riddle as he pointed at his favorite characters.

"Mama made this. The lost princess gets kidnapped by a giant crow and is dropped far away from home. She lands in the rose garden and makes friends with a magician and a mercenary who was summoned to work for the king." Grimm explaind

The story continued. The magician and mercenary protected the princess from a troll as they journeyed to see the king. The princess meets a magic cat that she kept. (no, this isn't Wizard of Oz) When they arrived at the Red Kingdom they were bombarded with rules and when the magician was asked to kneel before the king he refused. As punishment, the magician was sent to the dungeons. The princess was the only one not locked away so she frees her friends and challenges the king. The princess pleads with the king to see the dark spirit haunting and the gang banishes it. It ends happily when the king makes the boys knights and asks the princess to stay. She denied him so he told her about a neighboring kingdom that might help her get back home.

It was an extraordinary tale that Riddle knew by heart. Even if the details were changed. It didn't mention that Ace became the next "king" after Riddle graduated. Something Yuu complained about often after the power went to his head.

"That's quite the story. You must really like it." Riddle said hand it back to Grimm. "Do you have a character you like most?"

Grimm looked over to his mom be standing on his tip-toes and whispered into Riddle's ears.

"I like the princess."

"Really?" Riddle asked.

"I tried painting the flowers because she really likes red flowers like the princess. All the flowers turned white to red and the princess liked it." Grimm said proudly.

"I have an idea. I know a way to turn roses red. I could show you." He whispered back.

Grimm squealed in excitement and bounced on his fet as he turned to him mom.

"Can we play outside mama?"

Yuu pursed her lips indecisive of what to do next. She fought off the impulse to be suspicious. She trusted Riddle but did she trust him with her son. They hadn't seen each other in years after all.

She also wanted to be a selfish and keep him to herself. She hungered for the familiarity he brought back into her life.

But the warm gaze Riddle gave her settled her mind. She nodded in agreement and watched Grimm drag him away.

From the window Yuu watched as Riddle kneeled down next to Grimm. He had forgotten about trying to keep his suit clean as he pulled out his wand and handed it to Grimm.

Yuu immediately wanted to rush outside to stop him with every excuse as to why Grimm wasn't ready for magic but stopped herself. Grim wasn't her. He wasn't going to go through what she did.

Riddle taught Grimm how to hold the wand properly and asked him to imagine red roses in from of him. Grimm asked a million questions as Riddle calmly answered.

A good mother doesn't press her fears on her child. She wasn't going to traumatize him like she was. Riddle felt the same. He wasn't his mother and never pushed Grimm farther then needed.

A bit of wordless magic later the roses turned a brilliant ruby red.

"Mama! Mama look! Magic! We used magic" Grimm was in awe of this man.

Yuu cheered along when they returned inside knowing that Riddle did all the work.

"Don't you want to give them to the princess? You know that they are her favorites." Riddle smiled kindly.

"Princess? Mama?" Grimm looked to her with a questioning gaze before recognition lit up in his eyes.

Yuu felt her face burning so red that Riddle would be jealous. Which he wasn't but he couldn't help but think it was payback after all these years for her antics.

(This series might take a while to finish. I'm going to try to post more lengthy fics for characters)

Tag List:

@kamisatoaiko@professionalreblogs@kai200x@lianreine@loivre@jackalope08@code-roevember@growingupnrealizing@ryxmix@rainbowcake1212@blazestar0525@botswanasvetlana

#twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland yuu #riddle rosehearts x reader #twst riddle #twisted wonderland riddle #riddle rosehearts #twisted wonderland grim #twst grim #dire crowley #twst dire crowley #twst divus #divus crewel

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for taking pictures of my sister's house and not deleting them?

I (25f) and my adopted sister L (also 25) have grown up together since we were babies and are extremely close. I truly love her and want the best for her.

She has been married for 5 years to D (25m). They dated since they were 18 and got married at 20. I never had an issue with him except at times I thought he was immature. They have a kid together who is adorable and about to turn 3.

However, as they have been married i have an issue with him. I don't hate anyone, but he is highest on my shit list. Not an exhaustive list but he has (and I want to make this clear THESE ARE THINGS I HAVE WITNESSED I AM NOT LISTING THINGS SHE ONLY HAS TOLD ME ABOUT):

Whenever they argue yells at her. Even in front of guests (ahem me). She'll yell back and then he gets upset she is "raising her voice" at him, when he started it.

He won't let her get a job. He has canceled her applications for jobs before. She has sold some stuff online until he sold the materials she used to make things. Her only "income" is if he decides to give her an allowance and transfer money from his account to hers (please note they have BOTH their names on the accounts but one is considered hers one his). If she takes money from his account he gets mad. Bills, groceries, etc. Come from "her" account

Was always sweet but now uses her as jokes to his friends. Demeans her in front of them.

They move a state over after they got married, almost 5 hours away. Doable in one day, but many don't like to do it. Since being married, she has effectively not seen any of her friends except when they come into town to visit. I have went to visit her and one of her friends did, that friend confided they did not feel comfortable or welcome. That doesn't bother me cause personally I don't give a shit what D thinks and am there for my sister and nephew. But I have overheard D talk bad about all her friends, even me, snd encourage her not to talk to them.

The two friends she has made in the area D has told her to drop because they are "bad influences". The worst thing one has done was medical Marijuana that was prescribed to them. Not sure how they are bad except they've encouraged her to get a job and be more independent

D decided to get a cat, which my sister has a known allergy to. She didn't want the cat, but D brought it home. It has absolutely zero training and has destroyed their home. It pees everywhere, including my nephew's bed. It hates absolutely everyone except D, even attacking my sister for sitting on the couch next to D. D refuses to get rid of the thing even though it has scratched my sister and nephew multiple times and my nephew is afraid of it

Of course, there's more, but those are all things I have witnessed. The last part is what prompted me to take pictures of the bed that was peed on, the scratches on the kid and my sister. My sister showed me texts of her begging D to get rid of the cat and to me it seemed he threatened her, so I took a picture of that.

I personally believe D is an abusive prick. Definitely financially and emotionally, but not physically unless you consider neglect or him keeping the cat. He has never once hit my nephew or my sister that I have seen, and she has never stated he has. My sister has talked about leaving but then goes back to him, and I know on the outside it seems clear to me what to do but I know there is a cycle of abuse. When she is ready to leave him, she knows she can come to me and our parents.

However, D found out I took the photos. He called me drunk and extremely irate, but he didn't explicitly threaten me. It was implied. He called me an asshole, which is what made me think of this. He told me to delete the photos and that upon me doing so, he will get couples therapy.

On one hand I know they need therapy. On the other, what's to prove he will do this after I do that? My sister is begging me to delete the photos because she believes if they have therapy things will improve.

To be specific: D wants to be there when I delete them and make sure they are gone and to me that just proves how bad of a person he is because he doesn't want any evidence of any wrongdoing. My sister has sent me multiple texts and I know she has been trying to make a way for things in case it does go south, but she is afraid the inlaws will attempt for custody because apparently the inlaws have a bit of money and know the judge in our area. I dont want these photos to be used against her either...

AITA for not deleting them?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[squirmhoney]

A Heavy Hand

A/N: For all of you that follow me I’m sorry that this isn’t my normal house of dragon/DC comic fics but this has been swirling around in my head and just needed to come out. Warnings: Dark. Non Con. Dub Con. Step-Siblings. Smut. Violence. Degradation. 18+ Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Step-sister! Reader Word Count: 3k+

Rafe's hand on your thigh was heavy, impossible to get off no matter how many times you had tried. It's not like you could make a scene at the dinner table with so many people around, Rafe would only find a way to weasel himself in a lie to your parents. Normally they would believe you over him but lately you had been acting up, hanging out with the wrong crowd of people and Rafe had been the one to rat you out to your parents.

After everything with Sarah, your mother was livid to find out you had been hanging around the cut. But your step dad, it had cut his open wound deep to think he could have another daughter that would abandon him in his time of need. They said you were house bound until they knew they could trust you again, making Rafe the main person to watch over you.

He seemed to happy about it. His lips turning up into a wide grin on his face when your parents turned their backs away. The same one that adorned his face now as his hand shifted a little higher up your bare thigh.

You had to clamp your thighs together, crossing your legs over to make sure Rafe couldn't go any further. With that the smile dropped from his face, he turned to you with an uneasy stare that you couldn’t totally read. He didn't seem upset, no, his expression seemed to be enticing you to challenge him as he leaned closer to you.

"I'm going to need that hand back if I'm going to eat," Rafe whispered, raising his eyebrows at you.

There was no arguing that so with a slight bit of hesitation you unwrapped your legs, giving him the room to move his hand away. But of course you shouldn't have trusted Rafe because the second he had space, his hand slipped higher, pinky finger grazing the fabric of your underwear.

"Rafe," you yelped, thighs shutting on his hand again.

"Y/N," Ward called across the table, looking over to the pair of you. His tone was stern and his glare was heavy as if he was warning you to not to act out of line again.

"We were just messing around," Rafe was quick to reply, playing the best older brother. The one you had never seen in your years of growing up around him. "It was my fault, Dad."

Ward brushed it off, nodding his head and turning back to his guests.

"That didn't go well for you," Rafe's voice was low as he spoke under his breath, only for you to hear. "Going to have to start behaving a bit better if you want them to trust you again."

"Go to hell," you hissed at him, trying to really push his hand away.

All you did was make it worse for yourself, hoping by parting your legs slightly you would be able to force his hand away but instead he used it to his advantage. His hand cupped your covered pussy, rubbing his fingers over the material for a second, before finally pulling away. But the second was long enough to see the way your lips parted in inaudible sigh and how your nipples pebbled through the fabric of your t-shirt.

It was enough for that smirk to be plastered on Rafe's face all over again. As if he had won some sort of game, that you didn't even realise you had been playing.

*

"Aren't you happy to have a little bit of freedom?"

"It's not really freedom when I'll be hovering around you and your dick head friends all night," you retorted, rolling your eyes.

Rafe was amused by your response, it seemed he was amused by everything you did these days. The sort of amusement he derived from  having some sort of control over you and your life.

You wanted to be anywhere but in his truck driving to the beach with him. But Rafe had somehow convinced Ward that under his supervision you would be fine out and about. He'd make sure not to let you out of his sight, he had promised.

"Fresh air, the ocean, drinks," Rafe listed, tapping on the steering wheel. "Isn't that the sort of things Pogues like?"

"I'm pretty sure everyone from Outerbanks likes those things, Rafe," you said, crossing your arms over your chest. "I just don't think some enjoy it so much when they have to do it with their older brother they don't get along with."

"Step-brother," Rafe was quick to snap, tone icy as he glared at the road ahead.

"Your dad is married to my mum so legally we are siblings," your voice picked up, finally ready to let out your weeks worth of rage. "Step siblings or not it doesn't give you the right to touch me the way you have."

"Acting like you don't like it," Rafe sneered under his breath, gripping the steering wheel tighter.

You barely heard him and as much as you were gearing yourself up to yell at him some more, to get him to repeat what he had just said, he was quick to cut you off.

"No running off today," Rafe barked at you with a pointed finger like you were some dog. "In my line of sight at all times. A Pogue even looks in your direction and you come stand by me. Understand?"

You didn't even dignify him with a response, rolling your eyes once again.

But Rafe wasn't here for your attitude and he made that clear by pinching your cheeks with his hand and twisting your face towards him. "Understand?"

"Yeah," you nodded, voice faltering at his stern tone. "Whatever."

Rafe took a second before letting your face go, holding you in place for a moment as he took in the sight of your body. You felt a cool shiver across your body at the way Rafe checked you out, his jaw clenching once it reached where your skirt cut off at your thighs.

"Pretty thing," Rafe commented, not giving you a moment to respond as he hopped out his truck.

You hated the way he called you that as if you were some sort of play thing he already had in his pocket. But more importantly you hated the way it made you feel, heat flooding your body at the words.

*

At all times of the night there were eyes on you, if they weren't Rafe's eyes, they were Topper's or Kelce's. You were sure he had told them of your rendezvous with the other side of the island, making it clear you were to be watched at all times.

It was no use anyway with Rafe so close no Pogue dared to step within a hundred metre radius of your spot. Which you hadn't really minded anyway, spending most of the time drinking with a few friends you had gone to school with.

The party even seemed enjoyable for most of the night, everything going smoothly even with Rafe's eyes staring daggers into your back. Until you broke his rules, slipping away for a second to get a refill on your drink.

You hadn't thought when you tried to search down another keg, not even realising that you had slipped away from Rafe and his friends when you finally found one still in use. You didn't realise until a familiar warm smile came into sight, arms wrapping around you without even giving you a chance to register they were there.

"I've missed you so much," Sarah gleamed, pulling you tight into her chest. "I didn't know when I would see you again."

You reciprocated the hug, glad to see your sister after a few weeks of no contact. Happy to know that she was still doing somewhat alright.

"I've missed you too," you replied, finally letting go over each other.

"Why haven't I seen you in ages?" Sarah asked, genuinely concerned as her eyes widened at you.

"I'm house bound mostly," you told her, frowning at the subject. "Courtesy of Rafe." It was only then did you realise you had stumbled away from him, eyes darting round not able to see him anywhere. "Fuck."

"Hey, you know you really should be careful around Rafe," Sarah's voice was shaken, fearful as she spoke. "He's dangerous."

"He's psychotic, I'll give him that," you laughed, not bothering to look around for him anymore. "And I sure bet he's going to have a field day when he finds me here."

"No, seriously Y/N," Sarah's hand grips onto your wrist harshly, bringing your attention back to her. "You shouldn't be anywhere near him."

"You're sounding crazy, Sarah," you told her, eyebrows furrowing at her fearful state. "What happened?"

There wasn't enough time to answer when the rest of her friends showed up behind her. They gave you a small smile but John B was quick to to place his hand out for Sarah to take.

"Let's go," he said, pulling her away.

"Well bye then," you waved her off, scoffing at the way they all just walked away.

An uneasiness settled in your stomach as you made your way back to where Rafe might still be, drink long forgotten once you finally reached him.

You didn't know how to read Rafe when he found you, his body tense once he reached you. But there was a cool demeanour about him, a sort of façade you were sure he was putting up as he stood before you.

"Truck, now," he snapped, placing a hand on the small of your back as he guided you through the crowd.

You didn't even know what to prepare yourself for when you got back to the car, but when you were out of sight of the crowd you weren't surprised when Rafe gripped onto your arm to drag you back to the truck.

"You really can't follow simple rules," Rafe's tone was something you never had heard before and at first you really couldn't pin point exactly what it was. "Have to wonder off to go find some Pogue to open your legs for. I bet you love being a little slut for them, huh?"

"I am not a slut," you yelled at him, slapping against his chest with your hand. "It wasn't even like that."

"Tell me exactly what it was like. Tell me how it took you like three drinks to go in search for some attention like the whore you are," Rafe gripped onto you harder, as if the thought of it was making him angrier. "I bet that's all you need, some dick and some attention, then you won't go crawling back to your beloved Pogues."

"It isn't like that," you screamed, feeling yourself become choked up from the comments he was making. You didn't even know why you felt such a need to defend yourself against him about it.

But that's when you finally pinpointed the venom that he was spitting from his mouth. It was jealousy, the thought of you being with someone else but not just anyone, a Pogue. At first you thought his attempts at groping you inappropriately or looking at you in certain ways was just another way to amuse himself by winding you up. But no, he really wanted you. And his next actions proved it even further.

"Get in," Rafe commanded, throwing the back car door open and shoving you inside.

You didn't even protest against him, scattering to the other side of the seats. You hadn't even thought why he had placed you in the back, not even questioned it until his hands started to unbutton his shorts in front of you.

He couldn't really be doing what you thought he was doing, there was no way. You were still parked up by the beach, away from the crowd but anyone could still walk or drive up beside you.

"What are you doing?" You asked, face completely dropping when he started to climb in beside you.

"Seeing as Dad and Rose's punishment clearly isn't working, I think it's time for me to make my own," Rafe seemed so sure about the words that fell out of his mouth, closing the door behind him. "Maybe then you'll listen."

"Rafe, you're joking right?" You were still in disbelief, bringing your knees up to your chest to shield yourself away from him. "You got your message across. Okay? I won't go anywhere near the cut again."

"Those words are like sweet music to my ear," Rafe grinned from ear to ear, yanking you down by your foot. He pinned you down to the back seats, body hovering over you as he pulled his t-shirt off. "But I need you to mean them and right now I don't think you really mean them."

"This is too far even for you." Tears brimmed your eyes as you looked up at him, shaking your head for him to stop.

"Too far," Rafe scrunched his face up as if contemplating the idea in his head. "I think this punishment is perfectly acceptable." He leaned down, holding your hands above your head with one hand. "I think someone needs to fuck the traitorous brat out of you. Give you the attention you seem to fucking crave so badly."

"Rafe-"

Your protest was swallowed with his lips on yours, hungry as they moved against yours. He nibbled at your lips when you didn't kiss back or open your mouth for him and when that didn't seem to work, he bit onto your bottom lip hard, making you yelp and open your mouth for him.

He had drew blood, you could taste it when his tongue slipped into your mouth and you think the fact turned him on even more as he pressed up against you. You felt slightly docile after he was done kissing you, too busy trying to regain your breath to fight off his next move.

"Pretty thing," he seemed to admire you from above, slipping his free hand across your body. It grazed your subtle skin, fingers dancing around the edges of your clothes, taking a second before slipping yours bikini top off with ease. "Fuck so pretty."

He was in a trance at the sight of your tits, admiring the way your nipples had pebbled. It shouldn't of been a shock to you when his mouth latched onto one of them but you couldn't help but yelp as you felt his wet tongue lick at your nipple. You even had to fight back a sigh at the feeling, grinding your teeth together to keep any noises of pleasure at bay.

Once you got your breath back you were able to speak again but when you opened your lips, the noise that slipped out worked against you as Rafe grinded his hips against yours, eliciting a small whimper from you.

"That's my good girl," Rafe spoke into the skin of your breasts.

"Rafe, stop this isn't right," you told him, trying to wriggle free. All you did was rub against him, enticing him even more. "We can't do this."

All that Rafe did was laugh at you, grinding slightly harder into you as he marked up your chest.

Once he seemed satisfied he lifted himself up slightly, enough for you to sit up yourself and make your way from him but Rafe had other plans. With one hand he shoved you back against the seats with ease, then in one swift movement he tore your panties off of your legs, throwing them onto the floor somewhere.

Then he was on top of you again, his body heavy on yours as he made himself comfortable between your legs. Your attempts to push him and slap at him did nothing to throw him off, it only seemed to encourage him as his hands pulled his shorts and boxers down.

"Rafe, please," you were crying, tears streaming down your face.

Rafe ignored your pleas as he wrapped his hand around his cock, giving it a few strokes before he lined himself up. He hissed at the wetness that met the tip of his dick, spreading it across your folds as he started down at it in complete awe.

"Fuck, you're so wet baby," Rafe cooed into your ear, flicking over your clit so gently with his dick.

You couldn't stop the whimper that fell from your lips or any of the other noises when Rafe finally slid into your walls. There was no fight in you left after that, your hands grabbed onto his shoulders for stability instead of slapping him away. Your lips fall open to let out soft moans instead of pleas for him to get away.

Rafe grinned in triumphant at how easily you succumbed to him. He made sure to bury himself deep inside of you with each slow thrust, his tip brushing apart of you that you didn't know anyone would ever be able to reach. With every thrust he had your walls clenching around him, dripping like they never had before.

You wanted to say something, to tell him this wasn't right and hold your ground a bit more but you couldn't. With every roll of his hips he had you panting and whining, mind becoming fogged as you became cock drunk. And you could tell he was loving every second of it.

It was in the way he drank in your vulnerability with his eyes, finding himself going faster so you could cling onto him just that tiny bit more. His eyes were so dilated you could barely see the blue, it was all too clouded by the darkness that was Rafe. He winked when he noticed you looking up at him, taking it as a sign to get closer to you as he pressed his forehead against yours,

There was an intimacy in this that you weren't expecting from Rafe, in his stares and the way he sometimes pecked his lips on yours. It was confusing, something you really couldn't think about in the moment but you were grateful for it. Grateful that he wasn't being completely cruel.

"Rafe," you were breathless as he pushed a stray hair of yours behind your ear.

"You're so perfect when you're just like this," Rafe groaned, taking your legs from the side of him. He pushed them down and in between the pair of you, having your ankles dangling by your head. With this angle he was reaching in deeper, making your eyes roll back at the feeling. "So at peace beneath me."

"Rafe."

A hand of yours reached out to push him away, finding it over stimulating as he pushed into you with no mercy. He could see you opening your lips again and not knowing if he would like what was about to come out, he shut you up the best way he knew how. He rolled his hips into you, hard, setting a brutal pace that had your nails digging into biceps for stability.

"Wait- uh," everything that left your mouth from there was incoherent to both of you, even his name wasn't pronounced properly as he fucked his rage into you.

You couldn't even help the way you were soaking him, walls sucking him in and squeezing him to keep him there. He could sense how close you were with your eyes fluttering shut and your thighs shaking. He wanted to push you there, to watch the way your face contoured as he pushed you over the edge.

But you were closing your eyes and he couldn't have that. His hand wrapped around your throat making your eyes spring open, bringing your attention back to him and grounding you a bit.

"Eyes on me princess," Rafe let out in a growl, squeezing his hand in a slight warning. "Got it?"

Eagerly you nodded even though your vision grew blurry with each second.

"You going to cum for me?" Rafe asked and you were honestly surprised how he could be so focused on you. With the way you were feeling, you could barely focus on anything.

"Yes," you managed to get out, feeling your cunt start to twitch around him.

You felt your face flush with embarrassment at the noises you made when you finally came, pussy fluttering around him. Your back arched up into him and you struggled to keep your eyes open. But you managed and you could tell Rafe was thankful, especially with the way his mouth hung open at your expressions.

He wasn't far behind, unable to hold back with the way your pussy clamped down on him, milking him of all his cum. He didn't even bother to pull out, painting your walls instead with every drop of cum he could get out. His pace grew sloppy, finally coming down giving you space to breathe as he collapsed on top of you.

It took you some time to get back to reality and Rafe sensed it as soon as your body tensed underneath him.

"We shouldn't of done that. You shouldn't of done that," you told him, voice still shaky. "This has really gone too far."

Rafe snorted at that, pressing a peck on your neck before resting his head against yours.

"I think I should tell dad." You didn't know what had come over you in that moment, his dick was still buried in you and you knew that nothing could make you muster up courage to ever speak this to your step dad.

"He wouldn't believe you," Rafe chuckled darkly, a venom in his tone that you knew so well. "I think he'll take my word when I tell him you were just slutting it out for some stupid Pogue."

"You're awful."

"Anyway you wouldn't want to tell dad. Not when you want me to fuck you just like that again."

Rafe finally moved, sitting up from his position to look around for his clothes. You noticed the mess you had made all over him, your wetness coating his dick and balls, even dripping onto the seats below. You were mortified at the sight of it and how badly you wanted to do it again.

As if he could feel you staring at him, Rafe turned to look at you. A smug smile over his lips at the sight of you cowering in the corner of his truck.

"So, round two here or back at the house."

"Fuck you."

With that Rafe's hand was tugging at your hair, yanking you towards him until you positioned yourself in his lap. He didn't care how you yelled at the pain, only cared about the way his cock was springing to life once again.

"That's not a nice way to talk to your older brother," He tutted, releasing his grip on your hair.

"You're so messed up."

"Does that make you messed up to?" Rafe pushed his tip along your folds again and you couldn't help but wince at the sensitivity of it. "Seeing how much you enjoyed that. You know I’ve never had a girl cum so hard on my cock.”

All you could do was whine in response as he guided your hips down on his length. You knew it shouldn't be happening again but you knew there was no way you were going to stop him.

"And I really want to see you cum again."

#rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe x reader #rafe imagine #rafe x y/n #rafe cameron smut #stepbro!rafe #dark rafe cameron

[cowboyfromh3ll]

Hcs for how each of the boys to react to "I'm pregnant"?

Any of them that you want to write for :)

So excited

English not my first language. Sorry

Van Der Linde Gang's Boys' Reactions To "I'm pregnant" (And Eagle Flies)

Hehehe this was so cute and also I didn't edit this ❤️

Warnings: none

Arthur Morgan

He'd be so fucking happy

Probably in disbelief at first but oh my God he'd be overjoyed

Ask you if you're serious over and over

Once he's convinced he's gonna ask all these questions about your physical and mental wellbeing

Celebrates with you (whatever that entails wink wink)

In his elated haze he's gonna wanna ask all these questions about your future together as parents

Is aware the gang ain't the best place to raise a kid but he'll reassure you that you'll have the whole gangs support

John Marston

Oh god

Let's just say he wouldn't be the most elated parent 😭💀

He's already got Jack and now he needs to take care of another?

If this were a revelation that came earlier in the game he's gonna be very irresponsible but I feel like he wouldn't deny that the kid was his

So at that point he's sort of forced to actually give a damn about him

And believe me he'd try but he wouldn't be the best at it, would need guidance

If this came later in the game like epilogue he'd probably be WAY more happier.

Your lives are finally settled and you can afford to have a kid

He'd be the happiest and more supportive husband and dad

Still wouldn't be sure about all the ropes but he'd try

Dutch Van Der Linde

He'd be SO happy

Like genuinely he'd shower you with gifts and praise and reassurance

I feel like part of it would be a power thing for him because not only can he lead a gang, but now he can lead a family

Also some sort of weird power symbol for him. Idk how, but it is

Wouldn't let you lift a finger

Would probably keep you in his tent to rest 24/7 and only allows a few people (Grimshaw, Hosea) to see you

He's going to hope and pray it's a boy

Charles Smith

HE'D BE IN SO MUCH SHOCK AND FEEL SM HAPPINESS IT'D BE SO CUTE

You sorta have to repeat the news to him a few times for him to fully absorb it

Literally a dream of his to start a family one day so now that he has it he's ecstatic

Probably incentive to leave the gang though, doesn't want his child growing up in that environment

Would prefer if you sit back and rest but won't hold you back if you don't want to

Javier Escuella

This is cause to celebrate

Takes you into town on a date

Offers you massages, foot rubs, hand massages

Sings to you to calm you

Holds your hair when you throw up (true love)

Buys you clothes to accomodate to your changing body

Kieran Duffy

THE SWEETEST REACTION

I feel like he'd start crying

Asks to touch your belly and would speak to it

That night he'd fall asleep while holding it

Wakes up the next morning and remembers you're pregnant and his day is already off to an amazing start

Get drunk while celebrating it and he'd boast to everyone about how he's gonna be a dad

Sean Macguire

He'd say some stupid shit I already know it

Probably crack a sex joke

He's getting stupid, fucking drunk. I'm talking black out

He's probably gonna wanna celebrate if you catch my drift HAHAHA

He'd forget to be gentle sometimes out of excitement, like carrying you around and cheering

Refuses to let you do any work

In private I feel like he'd cry

Lenny Summers

He'd probably panic a bit at first

Ask all these questions about how you guys are gonna be parents and if you're even ready

Once the two of you talk through it a little more he'll calm down and his nerves turn to excitement

I'm assuming y'all would be real young so he'd seek for a lot of guidance in the others

Constantly asks you questions about what you want and need

Bill Williamson

He'd be so flustered and nervous

Probably in disbelief for a while and asks if you're serious

I wouldn't blame you for thinking he's upset with the news at first

But he just needs time to process how his life's about to change!

He becomes even more gentle with you, more than he already is

Will argue with Miss Grimshaw about letting you rest/lightening your work load

And let's be real, she would lower your work load but he'd insist it stops altogether

Micah Bell

He'd be in disbelief, but bad disbelief

That or the sleaziest reaction

I'm leaning more towards sleazy reaction

Talks about how he's gonna raise the bravest kid and he's constantly gonna reference to the kid as he because I'm convinced he wants a boy

Brags to the others

Don't get me wrong the gang's happy for you but the way Micah uses it as a point of elevation is IRRITATING

Hosea Matthews

He's the cutest like seriously

He'd be sooo happy

Probably in disbelief that he even managed to get you pregnant

I believe he'd cry, and openly, he's not ashamed! He's happy!

Announces it to the whole gang, means for celebration

Takes you on dates to buy cute little baby items ahhh

Eagle Flies

HE'D FREAK THE FUCK OUT

Pace around the room asking if you're for real, contemplates his entire life, curses himself for cumming inside

You'd have to calm him down and talk him through it

It'd be a super emotional moment for the two of you, eventually he'd realize he's fine with the idea of kids and he's just nervous!

Would ask his dad and a lot of tribe members for advice

Over time he'd get way more excited and bring up the topic more often

#red dead redemption 2 #red dead fandom #red dead redemption 2 x reader #red dead redemption community #writing #van der linde gang x reader #red dead fanfiction #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x reader #john marston #john marston x reader #dutch van der linde x reader #charles smith x reader #javier escuella x reader #kieran duffy x reader #sean macguire x reader #lenny summers x reader #bill williamson x reader #micah bell x reader #hosea Matthews x reader #eagle flies x reader

[mrskokushibo]

Synopsis: Yoriichi visits nearly daily, but he is too shy to get closer to you. It's time to take matters into your own hands...

A/N: This fic is a part of Kinktober'23 Collaboration.

Prompt: Size Kink

Warnings: Smut. Sex. Romantic sex. Size kink. 18+

Wordcount: 1.9k

Kinktober Masterlist MrsKoku Masterlist

The afternoon sun was warming the ground, the residue heat radiating onto the engawa, where you and Yoriichi were seated next to each other, sipping tea. The delicate scent of jasmine was carried with the steam rising from the teapot and you felt relaxed and at ease. Well, it was not just the tea that had that effect on you, but also Yoriichi’s presence which was one of infectious peace and serenity.

The tall man held the dainty cup in his large hands, making him look like a kid at a play tea party. In the corner of your eyes, you were observing how delicately his long, sinewy fingers, handled the intricate thin porcelain cup. Amusing would be the right term to describe the sight, if it wasn’t for other, less wholesome emotions that it provoked in you.

He was a sizeable guy, well over a head taller than you, with a powerful build and an imposing presence. And yet, he was also the gentlest and kindest human you ever met. His face was so handsome that it was almost angelic and, in a sense, reflected his inner beauty. But his features were by no means feminine because that gorgeous face was set on a thick, muscly wrestler’s neck, and his voluminous hair covered up a pair of slightly larger, masculine ears, softened only by his long Hanafuda earrings.

And those eyes, oh those eyes. You could drown in them, like two bottomless maroon suns lighting up his face and pulling you in, to nevermore give you a respite from their addictive rays. Having him this close to you, made you often wonder what it would be like to get truly close to him. To have him just to yourself, behind locked doors. That longing grew stronger with every one of his little casual visits to your parent’s house.

He put his cup down and placed his large hands on his thighs. You could perceive the outline of the bulging muscles covered by his hakama. Your eyes lingered a little too long on the sight and when you raised your gaze to look up at him he was watching you with a stoic, but slightly embarrassed expression.

‘I guess I should be on my way.’ He spoke as he slowly stood up.

You followed suit and soon enough could once again admire his full height, having to almost tilt your head back to look up at him. Simultaneously, you took his hand and spoke in a hushed voice.

‘I would like you to stay.’ You blushed and looked down, but then gathered your courage and looked into his eyes again.

‘Come with me.’

He was so startled by your sudden assertiveness that he followed you without any protests. Your parents were in town and would not be back until evening, hence there was no one, apart from serving staff that usually kept to themselves, to interrupt your passage through the empty hallway and to your room. You slid the door open and led him inside, making sure to slide it closed behind you.

‘We shouldn’t be here alone. It is…inappropriate.’ A faint blush was now spreading across his otherwise pale cheeks.

‘But this is exactly what I want. To be with you one on one, in private.’ You spoke softly while running your hand along the hem of his kimono and down to his obi. His eyes followed the movement of your hand and when your hand stopped its short journey, he looked at your face again.

‘We should wait until…’ He didn’t want to say it, but it was there on the tip of his tongue.

‘Until what, Yori?’ You teased gently.

He swallowed. ‘Until we are, well, more official.’

‘But…don’t you want to test the goods before you make such a big life decision? What if you don’t find me, well, to your satisfaction…in bed?’ You could not believe yourself that you actually said that, but you did, the words literally just slipping from your tongue.

‘I do not need to “test the goods.” You are amazing in every way. How could “this” be any different.’ He made an awkward gesture toward the futon.

‘Alright then. I will put it like this for you.’ You moved closer to him and stood up on your toes, your hands on his chest, and you whispered, lips close to his.

‘I need you. I need to feel your touch. I have been craving this ever since we met.’

His expressionless, gorgeous face was slowly gaining a reddish hue, he did not move, but you could see something different in his eyes. They were growing darker, clouding over, with what you knew very well, was pure, uninhibited lust. It was only his self-control, gentle character, and impeccable manners that held him in place.

He sighed. ‘If you so wish then I will not stop this. I want it, too.’ His melodic, deep voice, was muffled by desire.

You smiled and nodded and began to undress him. You savoured every moment of it, the anticipation of finally seeing him naked was burning you to the core. Standing there with throbbing and leaking pussy, you could barely hold yourself sane. Slowly, you were untying his obi and as soon as that was out of the way, you untucked his kimono from under the hakama, opening it slowly and sliding it off his broad shoulders. He was standing still, like your very own, personal doll. A huge, sexy doll, just yours to play with. His shyness, for now, was stopping him from taking any initiative and instead, you kept on with your exhilarating task.

With the kimono out of the way, it was only the hakama and the thin, white hadajuban, a kimono-shaped undergarment, that separated you from seeing Yoriichi in his full glory. So, you kept going, untying the little hime holding the thin cotton sides together. You swallowed before proceeding to untuck and open. You felt like a kid on their birthday, opening that one special present, that they anticipate being the exact one they have been waiting for.

With burning cheeks and shaky hands, you peeled off the final layer, removing it with a drawn-out motion off his torso. You could feel your knees go weak at the sight that met your eyes. The sheer size and definition of his muscles gave you the shivers. Soon, you were about to have all that so close to you, the vision of him positioned between your legs and crawling on top of you, was driving you insane with arousal.

You placed your hands on his chest, indulging in the feeling of stretched, smooth skin, covering the rippling brawn underneath. You stood up on your toes once again and pulled him gently into a kiss. This time, he finally took action. His hands grabbed gentle hold of your head and he reciprocated the kiss with soft lips. You thought you would literally melt, his kiss was this perfect. You could hardly believe that this shy man possessed such skill, but oh he did, much probably thanks to his transparent world ability. Your tongues were swirling, and you let your hand wander down to the front of his hakama. He was hard. Fully erect, in fact, sporting a size that took you aback, wondering how will ‘that’ fit into your quite small hole.

While you continued the kiss, you untied the belts of his hakama, letting it drop to the ground, it was first now, that he began undressing you, with gentle hands untying your obi and then peeling off your garments layer by layer.

You now stood in all your naked glory in front of each other, bodies ready for the awaiting act of love and souls already fully entwined. While continuing the kiss, he began guiding you toward the futon. There was no going back now that you awakened the man in him. His large chest heaving, his eyes dark with lust, and strong hands exploring every inch of you.

The futon was now behind you and he directed you to lie down, him following suit. You could not believe this was happening. This tall, gloriously handsome, and strong man was now shamelessly spreading your legs and leaning himself over you. His lavish red-brown hair cascaded onto your breasts and belly, and you ran your fingers in awe through the thick, enviable locks. You looked into each other’s eyes, the attraction between you like a strong electrical current, causing your bodies to take the reign over your now completely blurred minds.

‘Are you ready for me?’ His deep, enticingly masculine voice wedged into the silence.

‘Yes…’

The butterflies in the depths of your core were fluttering with full force when he raised himself on his knees, lining up his impressive manhood with your visibly soaked entrance. He placed his hands on your plush hips and lifted you up a little onto his thighs. With his gaze locked on yours, he started to push into you. The sensation was beyond description. It was as if everything around you ceased to exist and the pleasure he was giving you was becoming one with your senses. Already now, with only a couple of inches of him inside your pulsing center, you knew, that this was something you could no longer be without. Call it love, addiction, but whatever it was it was engraving itself into your body and soul, making it his temple.

He lowered himself over you, placing his huge arms on each side of you for support, elbows, and forearms on the futon so that the full length of his tall body was in contact with yours. This closeness was dizzying, but you also felt a safety and belonging you never experienced before. This was total surrender, you wanted him in you for all eternity. His full length and girth were now gliding in and out of your drenched core, his hips grinding into yours to full contact.

With every slow thrust, the coil inside you was winding up, throbbing pleasure so powerful, that you could no longer control your moans. You were becoming loud as he worked away in silence, only the strained breathing disclosing the severity of his actions. Soft kisses were being placed on your neck and lips. Occasionally a large palm made its way to the softness of your breasts just to disappear again for support so desperately needed to enable the increasing pace and strength of his hips pumping into you.

When the coil finally burst, you exploded in an orgasm that washed over you like a tsunami. The months of longing and daydreaming amassed to this very moment of pure and majestic ecstasy. It seemed to have lasted for ages, your spasming muscle gripping him tight like a vice, as he continued to move on the way to his own release, which came only a couple of moments after yours. He was quiet all through his climax, but the violent and repeated contraction of his abdomen was a testament to how hard he came, filling you up with the build-up seed from his large balls.

You kept kissing, fucking, and exploring each other for hours that day. Until the late afternoon came and it was time for him to leave. But from now on, your meetings would no longer be about polite tea drinking and idle chat. And you looked forward to them with every inch of your body.

Banner by @cafekitsune Divider by @saradika

Tagging: @doumadono @muzansfangs @yoriichiskatana @ask-yoriichi @sunandflame @tired-writer04 @muzanswaifu

#yoriichi smut #demon slayer yoriichi #yoriichi x reader #kny yoriichi #yoriichi tsugikuni #yoriichi x you #demon slayer kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #kny #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer smut #kny smut #demon slayer x reader #smut #kny x reader #kny x y/n #kny x you #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kimetsu no yaiba x you #demon slayer x y/n #demon slayer anime #astrasolitaris #mrs kokushibo #yoriichi tsugikuni x reader #fluff and smut #romantic #romance #kny anime #kimetsu no yaiba anime #kimetsu no yaiba fanfic

[talas-starlight]

Scarred Spirits - Zuko x fem!reader (pt.7)

Summary: reactions from team avatar when they find out your ozais assassin

warning: mentions of scars, not very happy gaang, mean katara!, angst

masterlist: here!

most previous part: here! (all other parts can be found in my masterlist!)

authors note! hello!! idk if anyone will be reading this but if you are welcome!! i haven't posted to this series in YEARS so please forgive me as I'm very rusty at writing but please enjoy!

Unified screams erupted upon Appa. “YOU’RE WHAT!”

“Aang what have you done! You literally let a murderer on Appa! She’s going to kill all of us! Katara was right, and I can’t believe I ignored her.”

“I KNEW IT! Quickly Aang, land Appa and let’s get her off!”

Unable to take it anymore, Toph lost her cool. “Can you knuckle heads shut up! I highly doubt that she will kill us, why the hell would she listen to you guys fighting all the time when she could end her misery by taking you out.”

Reality hitting Sokka and Katara, they finally piped down, allowing Toph to continue.

“Look, what you said is highly questionable. I’m not saying that I trust you, but you’re going to have to give us more information than that or else I’ll throw you off myself. Got it?”

You sighed. At least someone in the group had more sense. “Yeah, of course. What would you like to know?”

“Well for starters a name would be great. Oh and maybe, I don’t know, how and why you’re the Fire Lords Assassin?!”

You almost wanted to pull Katara’s braid for the irritating look of satisfaction on her face. “Right okay… well my name is y/n. uhhh and I was forced to become his assassin when he caught me after I broke into the palace three years ago.”

“That’s it?! Nuh uh lady. I know he’s the Fire Lord and had done some awful things but why would he do that to a child?! You’re either lying or somethings still missing.”

There was a lot to weigh up. To suddenly reveal everything about you would be too much and would get you thrown off Appa anyway. Yet to reveal nothing wouldn’t let you gain enough trust to even last a day. Leaving you to share the one thing you knew so little about yourself that you didn’t care if they knew and hopefully enough of a miserable, pitying tale that they’d let you off the hook for the time being.

“My parents aren’t in my life, they never were. I don’t know who they were or why they did it. All I had was my trainer, Zemin. In his time, he was the most notorious Assassin in the entire Fire Nation and when he retired, he never took on any students to carry on his legacy - if you could even call it that. Every other trainer was ecstatic because this meant that their students would earn the most bounties. Until there was me. I don’t know why he took me in… he just said that he found me as in infant and regretfully took me from an islands rocky shore maybe to sell me off somewhere. I suppose he realised he could make even more money from me if he trained me until I could pay off debt for him raising me. I did the one thing assassins could do, kill. All the money I ever earned from each bounty went straight to him. Luckily enough, I learned quickly, and I got to my final payment when I was 13, then he would have set me free.”

Horrified, Aang couldn’t believe what he was hearing. There was nothing like this in the Air Temples growing up. “Luckily enough?! How in any universe is that lucky!”

“Most assassins in the Fire Nation, and others, are stuck paying off their guardians or trainers well into their adulthood. Because of… certain tactics and advantages, I became quite popular if you could put it that way and most of the people, I had to take care of were…” Halting, you knew that if you verbally said some lives are worth more than others, Aang would probably go into cardiac arrest.

“Well, some had more people wanting them gone so the bounty was higher.”

“How does this have anything to do with you working for the fire lord! I don’t see why Zemin would let you go if you were doing so much for him.”

Your strength was fading. You hated yourself for how much you scretly enjoyed having people around that weren’t as idealistic as those in the Fire Nation.  “He didn’t. I got an anonymous mission to take out a high general in the palace. So high, that it was going to be enough for me to finish my debt.” After not being met with screams you felt reassured to continue…. they seem to be taking this well…

You took a deep breath. Here goes nothing. “On my way out, I got caught in the middle of an Agni Kai. The fire lord wasn’t too pleased I killed one of his generals or interfered with punishing his son. Yet somehow in his psychopathic mind he saw it as an opportunity to pledge my allegiance to him.”

The silence amongst the group was short lived.

“YOU MEAN ZUKO?”

“YOU KILLED SOMEONE.”

“AND YOU ACCEPTED?”

You scrunched your face. Maybe this was a bad idea to tell them. But it was too late to go back. “Yes, it was Prince Zuko in the Agni Kai, that’s how he got his scar. Yes, Aang I did kill the general, but to be fair I haven’t killed anyone since then… And Katara if you were being tortured every day for 8 months, I’m sure you would wear down too.”

The waterbender was unsatisfied with your answer. “Unbelievable! Of course, you did! Everyone has a choice in this world, and you chose the fire lord. You’re nothing but a coward.”

“My life was on the line! You don’t know anything about me.”

“Oh please, y/n. I do. I know everything! Sure, you were raised to assassinate others, but you can’t expect me to believe you didn’t know what you were doing when you were standing before Ozai. I would have stayed in a life of suffering than go with him.” Shaking her head, she pierces you with a disgusted look, “You’re no better than Ozai. No better than Azula.”

As Appa continued to glide through the ever-ending expanse of the sky, it seemed nothing could break the suffocating tension that encompassed everyone upon his saddle.

Toph was the only one to speak up. “Didn’t you hear her Katara? She hasn’t killed anyone since then! She’s surviving. If you ask me… she’s braver than any of us, you never know what could have happened to her if she got caught not actually killing her targets!”

Irritated Katara only grumbled, turning away while leaving the two boys to think about how they felt about you. Despite giving them answers, they still had so many questions.

It was undeniably clear that Katara has made her mind up about you, and you were sure everyone else was the same despite the earth benders attempts at comforting you. Hence, as you sat there across from the four of them, you were the first to break eye contact, turning your head to the side as you searched for something to focus on out there in the sky. Bird, a cloud, anything. You didn’t have the heart, the courage, to argue against what she said.

Unknown to you, Aang shuffled closer to you scared that his angry friend might hear him going towards you. His words only just loud enough to hear above the wind he whispered to you… “Its okay y/n. I don’t really understand what you’ve done or what you’ve been through but when youre ready.. you can tell us.

That was the first time your heart ignited a comforting warmth.

As Appas soft paws skilfully landing on the hard earth, you felt your heart drop inside you. What do I do now? Mind racing through all the possibilities, Toph seemed to have decided what to do before you could even stand.

“Hey! Come with me.”

Jumping off Appas saddle you landed on your feet with such a skilled silence, Toph had to sense your heartbeat to even realise you were next to her. Setting off towards where she’d set up her sleeping area, it was best you stuck closely behind.

“Don’t think about what Katara said, she doesn’t get it.”

“How so?”

Stalling in her tracks, she turned her unseeing gaze towards you. “She doesn’t know what its like to be born into a life that you don’t want. And she definitely doesn’t know how hard it can be trying to escape it.”

Unsure with how to reply, humming in understanding was the best you could come up with.

“Just stick with me and you’ll be fine. I know you most certainly don’t need me, but I’ve got your back.”

The next day had gone by agonizingly slow. With Toph trying to teach Aang earth bending you were left to your own devices since Katara decided to tag along. Although you found yourself tailing Sokka as he went his own way looking for food unaware of your silent giggles seeing him get stuck in the ground.

“...big things eat smaller things. Nothing personal. But this time, it didn’t work out that way…I admit it, you’re cute…”

You decide to finally reveal yourself, tired of your lack of entertainment. “What are you doing down there Sokka?”

Letting out a girl like squeal, he’s horrified at getting caught in this position. “Nothing!”

“You look like you could use some help.”

“I don’t want help from you!” You dismiss it. Surely he has no other choice but to make himself acquainted with you.

“Yeah, right. It’s funny, you’re probably the third person that has ever said that to me. The second in about the span of 48 hours.” you cant help but divert your attention towards the cute animal annoying him. “Aweee look at this cutie!”

“Get away from it!”

“Why should I do that?”

“Because I don’t want you to hurt it!”

“Please, I actually quite like animals. They’re a lot better than humans anyway.”

“I- well… fine! Just go away?”

You scoff, “Why’s that?”

“I don’t like you!”

“Hmm… is that so.”

“Yes, of course it is!”

You’re done feeling sorry for yourself. “Are you sure you don’t like me, or do you feel that way because of your sister?”

“I- well… argh! Fine! I don’t know.”

“Well… why don’t you talk to me and work it out for yourself? If you still dislike me so much I’ll leave you be and get someone to come help.”

A  silence fills the distance between the two of you.

He sighs, caving in, “So.. this Zemin guy. Did he REALLY not give you a choice?”

Looking up, you stare at the clear sky. “I learnt early on in my training that I didn’t have a choice or options in life other than what he wanted. Any exercise I rushed through, half assed, or tried to skip through when he wasn’t looking came with consequences.”

“What kind of consequences?”

“The kind that keeps all of my clothing and bindings on so I don’t constantly get pitiful looks or too many questions.”

He scoffs, “prove it”

Staring at all your layers you sigh, “don’t say I never warned you.”

Peeling off all your layers one by one until your down to just your tank top and pants, you decide to take off your face mask last. Your eyes meeting Sokka’s, you notice him swallow thickly. But its you to break the ice first. “In all fairness, most of them are now from Ozai. The older they look… well I’m sure you can work it out for yourself.”

“b-but-“Fuck why did I have to make him uncomfortable.

Unable to take it any longer, you pull him out from the hole in the ground. “Its fine.”

You turn to walk away after helping him, but he grabs your scarred wrist, the feeling of the textured skin making him internally wince. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have made you expose yourself like that. Its horrible that you had to experience that… hell we look the same age!”

“Everyone is on different paths. Look, lets just forget about it..”

Sokka feels like he could bust into tears “No! you don’t understand. I’ve seen the effects of the fire nation… hell they took away my mum. I still remember it, sometimes I have weeks where I keep reliving it in my nightmares, only finding peace when im awake. Its like im being haunted. But- but you?! You have to face it whether you’re awake or asleep”.

Squeezing your eyes shut, you can’t handle the intensity of his words. Theres nothing you can do. Nothing you can say. You hug him. You don’t remember the last time you held someone. It feels weird, almost wrong. But as he squeezes you back, tightening the embrace, you understand one thing. You have an understanding with the water tribe boy, despite how dark it may feel.

Hours pass by as you sit with sokka talking about useless topics until the other three join you once more. Feeling weariness in their gaze, you realise you forgot to put your layers back on. Now everyone can see your face and scars.

Only Aang has the courage to speak with you.

“Hey. Uhhh, y/n?”

“Yeah?”

“I just… I’m sorry for not speaking much with you since yesterday. I didn’t mean to, it was just a lot to process personally! Growing up with the Air Nomads, I was taught that killing is wrong and that under no circumstance should that be the answer. If I’m completely honest with you, I still stand by those teachings and to have someone who has… killed… so close to me and the people I care the most about is… unsettling.”

There it was. You knew despite how much he was trying; you knew he wouldn’t be able to see past what you did. What you are.

“I understand. I don’t blame you, or anyone for reacting the way they are, and I know what it feels like to want to protect those who mean something to you.” You glance at Sokka, remembering how he understood.

“Just… please understand that I’ve realised what I did was wrong and while I can’t change everything that I have done, I’m trying to move away from that way of life. I don’t want to be a killer anymore. I’m trying my best to fix it.”

“I know…. Its just-“

“You don’t trust me.”

“What?! NO! I mean…. I don’t know. You clearly have good inside of you but it’s hard to look past.”

“I get it. I’ll head off then, the world needs you Aang and I won’t be the one to stand it your way.”

“No! stop! Please! I know I said it’s hard for me to do, but I clearly see you trying your best. I know you won’t hurt me. I just… I suppose I need to open my eyes more. See you for who you are now, what you’re doing now.”

But what if you can’t? What if I’m still that person, no matter how much I try to shove it away. This is what I have been made to become?

“Okay.”

Letting out a nervous quiet laugh, he glances back to everyone. “okay well… lets eat!”

Zuko stares at the sky in the heavy downpour. “You always through everything you could at me. Well, I can take it. And now I can give it back!”

Lightning cacks in the sky before his eyes.

“Come on!”

“Strike me! You never held back before!”

Met with only the sound of the world around him, he feels helpless. Lost. Alone.

Screaming out, Zuko falls to his knees as the rain and guilt encompasses all of his senses.

His voice scratchy from screaming, he can hardly croak out… “You never held back from her."

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#zuko x reader #zuko fanfic #zuko #the gaang #zuko angst #atla zuko #prince zuko #avatar aang #aang #toph #sokka #suki #avatar the last airbender #atla #zuko x aang #aang x katara #atla aang

[urdepressedslut]

You’re Mine, Sunshine ❝part nine❞

♡ Pairing: Grumpy!Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Fem!Reader

♡ Summary: After the events from the other day, you try and cope with the reality of what happened. The world is a lot less colorful than you remember. Bucky helps comfort you after you realize you have no one left.

♡ Warnings: heavy angst, flashbacks, abuse, mentions of parent death, hints to depression, reader doesn't know she has depression, anxiety attacks

Series Masterlist

Trope ⇢ Grumpy x Sunshine | Mob!Au Bodyguard!Au

Italics are flashbacks

“I don’t know… I kinda like shirts that don’t hug me too tight.” You mumbled, scratching the back of your neck.

You heard a dramatic gasp, and you looked into her eyes as she shook her head, holding up the top she had been trying to convince you to buy.

“Babygirl— why can’t you see how gorgeous you are. Anything you wear, you’d make look like a million bucks.” You Mother almost whined, and you couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped your lips from her antics.

“Ma you know that’s not true.” You argued, failing at keeping a serious expression.

“No baby— I know I’m right. That’s my secret.” She argues back confidently.

She walked closer and started combing stray hairs out of your eyes, smiling at you adoringly as she did so. Her eyes practically sparkled with love.

“What’s your secret Ma?” You asked quietly, leaning into your Mother’s delicate touch.

She cupped your chin and raised your face to her lips, the feeling of her pecking your forehead sweetly. The gesture made you all warm inside— her love filling you with so much protection.

“Mommies never lie. So you really are beautiful baby— and soon you’ll start to see that, and you’ll be breaking hearts left and right.” She spoke quietly to you.

“I won’t be breaking any hearts… because that means I’ll have to date people and well… that’s scary.” You admitted.

Your Mother lifted your chin back up, giving you another loving kiss on your forehead, stroking your cheek as if you were fragile and needed to be protected. In her eyes— you were her everything. Her little girl— she only wished you could live your life without any pain. She knew life wasn’t that perfect— but she’d do anything for her baby. She’s try as hard as she could to make her life perfect. She deserved it.

“It is scary baby, but if you never put yourself out there— you may never have the chance to meet people.” She cooed. “We learn a lot from everyone we meet, and if you don’t meet anyone— you won’t learn anything. It helps us grow into being a better person.”

You nodded in understanding, feeling comforted by her words. She believed that you could do it, so you started to believe you could. Your Mother truly did know best— she’d never put you in a bad situation. As much as you hated to admit it, she was almost always right.

“You’re so smart Ma. I’m glad I've got a Mama as good as you around.” You whispered as you hugged her tightly— forgetting that you were at the mall.

Her laugh vibrated through her chest as your head lay against her heart.

“You know your compliments always go straight to my head.” She joked and you snorted and playfully hit her hip.

“I’ll take it back.” You playfully warned.

“Please don’t— we were having such a nice moment.” She whined dramatically and you both went into a laughing fit.

The air was so cool— so breathable. Your limbs felt relaxed, your mind was at ease. Everything was so much easier with your Mother around, she truly was the light of your life.

"Okay, I'll get it." You finally gave in, pointing to the shirt that was hanging off her arm.

Your Mother eyes brightened and she smiled like the chesire cat, almost starting to jump up and down like a little kid. You forgot who was the older one sometimes. You just watched with a giggle.

"That's my girl." She ruffled your hair and headed towards the cashier.

You watched her walk away, happy that you could make her happy. Although the top wasn't what you'd usually wear— maybe your Mother was right. It was time to get out of your comfort zone— plus she was never wrong.

~

You cracked your eyes open at the sound of rain hitting your window, the peaceful ambience of a storm passing over the house. You let out a deep breath, a heavy feeling left sitting on your chest— the bittersweet memory still fresh in your mind. It was sweet because even the memory of your Mother could fill your body with the joy that you had been missing from life. Although it was bitter because they were only memories. Instead of staying in the moment with her, you were forced to be sent back into reality. Back to a world where she wasn't around anymore. That was the most painful realization you had to live through every day.

The days since her passing had been the same, but it was slightly different this time around. You were almost positive that because of the relationship between you and your Father was getting worse— had you desperately wishing to have your Mother back.

You wondered if it would've been easier to never know parental love, then live most of your life with it— then to not have it.

You hadn’t realized you had slept through the night, misjudging how exhausted your kind and body was. There was just a slight glow from outside, otherwise the sky was cloudy— the weather gloomy. The outside was currently how you felt, it seemed.

Glancing around the room, there was no sign of him. Which was the second thing that had come to your mind this morning. Bucky.

Pushing that thought to the side, you swung your legs over the edge of your bed— heading towards the bathroom. Your head felt heavy, your limbs feeling like there were wights tied to them. You overall felt like the walk to the bathroom was much harder than it should’ve been. You had hoped that a nights rest would ease the haze that covered your brain. But as you walked to the bathroom— you could still sense the thick fog within your head.

Switching on the light, you headed straight for the mirror without giving it much thought. You’d be lying if you said your reflection didn’t startle you. In fact the harder you looked— you doubted that was actually you.

Your eyes were puffy, red rimmed as they were the night before. Your lips were chapped, achey with how dry they were. All in all— it was the still irritated skin on your cheek that had you in shock. The palm sized mark had you staring without blinking— your breathing starting to come in rapidly. Almost instantly, the events from the night before began to play through your mind.

"You wonder why I don't want you around— do you not see how you act? Disrespectful fucking brat! I do all these nice things for you— I buy you a fucking house! I provide you with everything you need!"

The memory of his hand shooting towards your face had you flinching back in the space of your bathroom. The action startling you from just remembering.

You furrowed your brows, staring at your reflection in confusion. Puzzled at your body's reaction— the way you had jumped. Even though you were alone in the bathroom— you felt embarrassed. Your hand shot down to grip your thigh, squeezing the flesh until you could start to feel pain. Your nose burned again, your chest tight and uncomfortable— unable to expand fully. You gasped, almost breaking from this trance as you released your thigh— glancing down frantically at the now red and irritated skin. Your head felt fuzzy as you couldn't understand why you were acting like this. You felt like you were out of control of your body— your mind. You wiped your face harshly, drying your skin of any tears— any evidence that you had been a mess.

Without wasting another second, you headed from the bathroom and made your way downstairs— in search of Bucky.

Bucky had made himself comfortable in the grand office downstairs. The room seemingly untouched, obvious that you didn’t care for this room. That much didn’t surprise him. But what did shock him— was the stash of liquor that was kept inside the study.

Surely that wasn’t yours. He thought to himself.

He had sat by your bedside, guarding the room as you slept for awhile. After you started to mumble in your sleep— that’s when he decided to leave. He knew you’d want him to be there when you woke, but the words about your Mother escaping your lips seemed private. It felt wrong to over hear such information while you were unconscious.

He also just needed to excuse himself, needing to drown his thoughts with alcohol for awhile. His career let alone his life— was in jeopardy.

He didn’t want to fear Pierce— but he couldn’t stop the overwhelming waves of anxiety from crashing into him. Amongst everything else, you stuck out in his thoughts. Majority of his worries circled around you, the concerns about you being left alone— with Pierce. If it wasn’t his life he was worried about, it was you. He was only afraid of the outcome because if there was no him— he wouldn’t be able to protect you.

It continued to eat away at him— he knew he should do something. He let the thought pass by… I should run.

He raised the glass, downing the rest of the contents— enjoying the burn on his throat as he scoffed at the cowardly thought.

He’d would run for you… with you.

He stared at the empty glass as he attempted to digest the idea. Knowing deep down he wouldn’t be able to make a proper decision without talking with you.

“James?” You called out, grabbing his attention to the doorway.

You didn’t even attempt to send him one of your usual warm smiles, instead glancing around the room you completely forgot existed. For good reason.

“What are you doing in here?” You asked, but soon found your answer when you let your eyes drop to the bottles of liquor surrounding his empty glass. “It’s early.”

You pointed out, and Bucky lowered his gaze for a moment in shame before lifting his eyes to your face again. This was when he noticed how different you looked.

It was the little, subtle changes that no one else could distinguish. But he could— he could see it clear as day, and it broke his heart.

Your eyes were dull, missing the usual sparkle in them. Your face just seemed like it was longer, the way you didn’t even try to keep a smile on your face. He didn’t think he’d ever seen you so… not you. Lastly, what killed him the most— was the way you were standing. The way you were trying to seem so small, like you could be small enough to hide away from everyone.

“James?” You called again, breaking him from his analysis of you. It was then he realized he hadn’t responded.

“Uh… yeah guess I’m just a little stressed out.” He finally told you, not completely lying.

“You shouldn’t do that— it can cause a lot of issues.” You motioned towards the alcohol.

“I know.” He mumbled, lowering his gaze to the desk again.

“You should just talk to me, instead of drinking until you pass out.” You told him softly.

“I can hold my liquor well.” He tried to argue, glancing up and sending you a smirk.

You just shook your head, crossing your arms like you were a mom scolding her kid.

“I don’t care. You should still talk to me.” You told him sternly.

He couldn’t ignore the shock in your change in demeanor. Of course you’d be in a different mood from the events last night— but he wasn’t used to this solemn version of you yet.

“Okay.” He agreed finally, standing up to head towards another room— preferably one that didn’t hold as much negativity as this one.

You surprised him by reaching out to take his hand, holding it tightly in yours. You didn’t give him a second to show his shock— instead you held on, tugging him towards the direction of the library.

He hadn’t even talked with you yet, but somehow he already felt lighter— in a better mood. Just by your presence, let alone your touch— was enough.

Making your way through the library— hand in hand— you didn’t slow until you reached your spot. The same spot from the very first introduction you two shared. One that didn’t have that good of an ending.

The memory although had a sour end, you still looked back and wanted to smile. You two had no idea what was coming— so naive. Like you said— it almost made you want to smile. Almost.

“James, why are you drinking this early in the morning? I know you’ve got something on your mind.” You started, as soon as you two sat down in your spots.

He rolled his eyes, avoiding your stare. He knew you were right, but also he just didn’t want to have this talk. Though— he knew it needed to happen. He just wished he could have one more care free day. He hated himself for not enjoying them while they lasted.

“Doll, we know what’s going to happen.” He voiced lowly, body and mind defeated.

You flashed a fearful expression before attempting to harden your features back.

“What do you mean?” You asked him cautiously.

“I spoke wrongly to your Father— everything that happened yesterday… you know how this ends for me.” He hinted, hoping you’d understand.

You shook your head, while still glancing at him with a softened expression. You don’t think you’d ever seen Bucky so stressed, his face stuck in a concerned expression.

“You don’t know that for sure.”

“(Y/n)… your Father doesn’t give a shit about me! For all I know— he probably has a new bodyguard ready for you. I’ll be as good as gone soon!” He exclaimed, voice raising— but it was Bucky. You weren’t afraid of him like you were your Father.

“Nothing is going to happen to you— I’ll make sure of it.” You promised him, and for a second he paused and looked at you deeply.

He ran a hand through his hair, leaning back in his seat with a frustrated huff.

“I don’t really care what happens to me… I just don’t wanna leave you. I can’t… I can’t let him keep doing this to you.” He whispered, lowering his head— his emotions stealing his voice.

You felt your heart start to beat faster, the same butterflies fluttering around your stomach once more. Every time he protected you, made an effort to want to be with you— it had you speechless. You never knew you could find something like this again. After your Mother had passed— you thought the feeling was lost.

“We should run.” He spoke again, breaking the thick silence that had blanketed the room.

You swallowed at that suggestion, wondering why a small part of you still didn’t want to leave your Father. Although he had proved to really not care about you— love you. You still loved him. He was all you had left.

But maybe that wasn’t true anymore, here was Bucky sitting in front of you— willing to risk his life just so you could live your happy ending.

“Where will we go?” You spoke back finally, shocking him that you wanted to go along with it.

As he stared into your eyes, his stomach rolled sickeningly at the fear that was evident in your eyes. But it wasn’t fear for yourself— it was for him.

“Somewhere far away— somewhere he won’t find you. I have a few places in mind… but are you really willing to do this? Leave your home?” He asked, happy that you were on board— but still wanted to respect your decision.

You immediately thought of that one cheesy quote you’d read somewhere— not necessarily believing it until now. Home can be a person too.

You felt your nose burn, tears welling into your eyes and this time you didn’t fight it. Everything had been building ever since you’d woken up. The only place you felt safe wasn’t even your home anymore— it was him.

“This place doesn’t really feel like home anymore so… yeah I’m ready.” You admitted, your voice getting quiet by the end.

Bucky’s hand twitched on his thigh, the way his instinct was to touch you— to comfort you. He fought against the side of him that itched to jump over to you, instead he stayed rooted at his spot.

“There’s something else I need to tell you.” He started, not knowing if you were mentally ready to handle this. “Your Father has been keeping this from you for awhile, and he had asked me to keep it from you as well but— you deserve to know. I wanted to tell you so many times I just— I should’ve told you… so I’m sorry.”

You got up from your seat and plopped down next to him, not hesitating to reach out and take his metal hand in your two. Your held it comfortably while also using the metal ridges to fidget with.

“Hey, it’s okay. Don’t worry about what you should’ve done— you’re telling me now. That’s all that matters, so I appreciate that.” You assured him, scooting even closer so that your thighs were touching.

“Someone’s been stalking you (Y/n).” He finally confessed, and almost immediately he could feel the weight being lifted off his chest.

You didn’t speak for awhile, just staring at him like you weren’t sure if you imagined him saying those words. Your brain was having a hard time processing what he had said— someone was stalking you? You were disturbed, your skin crawling with fear. One thing stuck out to you the most— it was the fact that your Father had yet to tell you.

Bucky took your silence as a bad sign, watching you stare blankly at your lap, where your fidgeting hands stilled on his metal one. It was his turn to wrap his metal hand around your wrist, applying a gentle amount of pressure to try and get your attention.

“(Y/n)?” He asked softly, growing more worried the longer you stayed quiet.

You still didn’t know what you were feeling, it was hard to distinguish it when you were already overwhelmed with emotions today. Your brain felt burnt out— your mind wanting to shut off completely.

“How long?” You whispered, still staring at your lap.

“Awhile, and they’ve gotten close. They have left stuff on your doorstep— and I found it before you could see it.” He told you, watching you shiver from the information. “They found your Mother’s necklace in one of the boxes that was dropped off at your door.”

That had gotten your attention, your head snapping up to his— your eyes wide with horror. You immediately started shaking your head in denial, knowing where this was going. You felt like you were gonna be sick, so you tried to swallow back the bile from rising.

“No… No I— I know what you’re going to say! My Mother died from a car accident. That’s how she died.” You rushed out, your vision blurring with tears.

“(Y/n) I’m not saying whoever is stalking you was involved with her passing— I’m just saying that there’s something darker to this than anyone knows.” He assured you, watching you nod in understanding.

His heart hurt watching your body start to tremble, your bottom lip quivering.

“Do you have it?” You whispered ever so quietly.

“What?” Bucky asked suddenly, confused.

You faced him, grabbing onto both his hands now— needing him to ground you from spiraling. Bucky had to hold in the gasp that wanted to escape, from how close you appeared to be.

“Do you have the necklace?” You asked desperately, voice cracking, “My Father he… he wouldn’t let me keep any of my Mothers things.”

Bucky’s heart broke again, his eyes softening at your broken expression. The way you were trembling holding onto him, your eyes red rimmed and lost looking. He had never held such hatred for someone before— fucking Pierce.

“Doll, I’m sorry— he has it.”

You nodded in understanding but couldn’t hold back the new wave of tears. You didn’t hesitate, and threw yourself into his arms. Wrapping your arms right around his middle, feeling the bulky muscles flex through his clothes.

He didn’t waste anytime and engulfed you in his protective embrace. He willed himself to stay strong— for you. But your cries and shakes of your body were killing him, he swore he was feeling physical pain from it all. He wanted to take it all away— all your pain.

Both your legs hung off to the side, while you practically were sitting in his lap. But neither of you cared— yes, it was intimate. But it was intimate in a different way, you both clung onto each other— escaping for a little while just in each others embrace. Being so close now, feeling each other pressed up on another— it felt right. It felt like home.

You felt one of his hands lift to the back of your head, cradling your head as his metal fingers weaves through your hair— just slightly scratching your scalp. You could feel yourself melt further into him. Your body sagging into him.

“I’ve got you (Y/n), I’m not going anywhere.” He whispered soothingly.

“I wanna hate him.” You whimpered, your fists fisting in his shirt.

His heart clenched painfully, hating that there was nothing he could do besides be here for you at the moment. But every cry and whimper only convinced him further that he was doing the right thing— the right thing by running away with you.

“Does that make me a bad person— that I wanna hate him? I want to but… but I can’t!” You cried.

Bucky shook his head, before he realized you couldn’t see him. He pulled you back away from him so he could face you— that was also when he noticed how close you were to him.

“No it doesn’t. He hasn’t been a Father to you. He hurt you— It’s okay to wanna hate him.” He assured you.

He held your gaze, waiting until you nodded to make sure you understood what you were feeling was valid.

“I really wanna hate him…” You whimpered again, trying to lower your eyes but you knew Bucky wouldn’t allow it.

He didn’t know if there was anything he could say to truly make you feel better, but he hoped that his comforting embrace was helping. Little did you know— your tight hold on him was ridding him of any and all stress.

“I know (Y/n), I know.” He breathed out.

Before he could stop himself, he was lifting his hand to stroke his thumb across her cheek— letting his palm rest on your jaw.

Your eyes fluttered shut from his touch for a second, before they opened and gazed deeply into his. His eyes shined with something unusual— something you had yet to see coming from his eyes. You felt intimidated from the intensity that was his gaze— the way your stomach fluttered nervously. You felt the same urge as before, your body leaning instinctively closer to him— you felt so safe in his arms, you couldn't help yourself from wanting to sink deeper into the ocean that was him.

"(Y/n)..." His voice broke through your trance, "Maybe we shouldn't."

God he wanted to slap himself for even voicing those words, because he so badly wanted to devour you whole— loosen every thread that was tied on you— unlocking every inch and part of you that he didn't know he craved. But the sensible side of him knew it wasn't the right moment... right?

You were so vulnerable, it felt wrong for him to even steal a glance in the wrong way when your walls were crumbled before him. He didn't want you to think for even a second that he was taking advantage of you. He respected you greatly, and he was not going to allow himself to have no self restraint. He wanted you to be in full control— and even then he felt hesitant to let you continue. The kiss on his cheek from before, he felt he hadn't deserved that— earned that. He was greedy however— and took any breadcrumbs he could.

You only darted your eyes down to his lips, watching his tongue poke out to wet them— your eyes watching the pink dampen the plump flesh. You found yourself biting your own lip— a sudden craving intensifying at the sight.

Despite your desires, you leaned forward and placed another kiss to his stubbled cheek— this time letting your lips linger on the skin longer than the last. Bucky could feel the heat rush to his face, knowing his cheeks were most likely bright red. He didn't know how he held so much power, but the feel of your lips against his cheek— god he wanted to kiss you so badly.

You sent him a small smile, and he could almost see the real you finally coming to light. The sight had his heart swelling, his own lips curving up in a cheerful smile— relived to see his girl coming back.

"Thank you James— I don't know what I'd do without you." You whispered, holding his gaze with hidden devotion. "I need you."

He had to fight back the huge smile he felt approaching from your words— he tried to ignore the bubbling joy he felt from your words. The way you needed him just as he needed you.

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[nathanielzalexandria]

I love all the headcanons of "Steve is not dumb he's..." Hard of hearing, has poor eyesight, learning disability or his primary language is not English. I particularly enjoyed @dwobbitfromtheshire 's recent headcanon that he's hiding it because his father hates feeling inferior and only Eddie realizes that he is not dumb. But I would like to throw my own hat in the ring.

Steve is not dumb. Actually, he's quite smart and did quite well in school (because his parents would not expect anything less). He just wasn't into nerd culture and everyone just placed their stereotypes and rumours of him being a pretty and privileged rich jock who bought his way out of school but couldn't buy his way into college. Nevermind that he was in the top 10 students of his year and for most of his classes if not topping them and if not he wasn't failing the rest other than one or two science/math-based (rumours say the school forged those marks so that Steve could continue sports) and had a 3.6 GPA. It wasn't enough to get into his Dad's alma mater so his dad dismissed any of the other schools he got accepted into.

He does not try to hide his intelligence from Nancy or the Party, but Nancy had bought into the "Steve is simple-minded " narrative and the like before they got together and failed to realize that they are both in the same AP classes that were full of seniors and in any group or partnered project he more-than-well pulled his weight and had his own insights. So she spreads the narrative to Mike who spreads it to the rest of the party so by the time the events that befan with Dustin asks him for help with his "dog" and developed into concussed in the back of a car while a preteen drove his car, the kids have also bought into parts of the narrative. It doesn't help that he really isn't into the stereotypical nerdy stuff

Even his best friend Robin believed the lie until she worked with him and then got tortured with him by Russians. She eventually realises that he's way smarter in a practical sense than people give him credit for (he did raise himself since he was 11 or so) but does not think of it as stretching into the academic side of his life. She has not stopped calling him "dingus" though.

Eddie on the other hand knows better, which is why when a specific exam was coming up he turned to Steve.

He barged into the Harrington home a day when tye entire party was their.

"Stevie, you either have to tutor me or lend me your notes for this class. I am not failing this class and increasing the possibility of another year at fucking Hawkins."

Mike and Dustin burst out laughing at that before Steve can answer.

"I know you're e bad at that subject, but I didn't realise you were desperate enough to use Steve's notes," Dustin says with that condescending tone that means it should be obvious to Eddie.

Mike snorts at that derisively, "If he even has notes."

"Maybe," Lucas said diplomatically, "there are better options than using Steve's notes?"

Nancy steps up next offering some of her notes and flashcards since she took the class last year/is taking the class, "It's not my strongest subject but if we do a study group I'm sure you won't fail the class."

Eddie stares at the group with growing bewilderment as they agree that Nancy is the best choice while implying that Steve was not. Actually, they were acting as though he was dumb for even asking Steve, which made no sense to him.

Eddie turned his eyes to Steve. His posture by the kitchen island was much more different than when Eddie burst in. He had subtly curled into himself as if to make himself smaller, shoulders tense and a resignation on his face as if he's been through this conversation so many times before.

It was almost as if...

"You guys think that Steve is dumb, don't you?"

There was the type of silence that only comes when the quiet part is said outloud.

"No we don't think Steve's dumb," Robin begins and Eddie can hear the 'but' before she even said it, "But you know he wasn't good at the school part of school."

She continued to ramble on from there but Eddie did not hear any of it. He was too busy reevaluating the group he was with and rechecking old memories and facts to see if there was any inkling of truth to this strange idea that even the older teens should know isn't true.

It took him a moment to find the answer, and when he did he could not stop the derisive laugh that burst out and interrupted Robin's ramble.

"You guys fucking bought into the rumours, didn't you? I expect that from the kids maybe even Johnathan, maybe even Robin because of you became friends after he left school, but not from you, Nancy."

Nancy had that look on her face that she got when she was ready to argue but Eddie steamrolled over it.

"Jesus H Christ! Weren't y'all together for a whole fucking year? How do you not know that he was at the top of his year when you were together? Unless you dismissed that in favour of believing the rumours that his parents paid for his grades and the school wanted to make sure he kept on playing sports?"

He paused for a second waiting for someone to contradict him, but the look on Nancy's face was one of scrambling to defend herself. He sighed at that; she still wasn't getting it and it a sweeping look at the others proved they were lost too.

"Even if they paid off the school he would not have been in the top ten of his year, he would be like Carver and Hagan whose parents paid and their grades were just good enough to get into a decent college without too many questions. And they would not have kept on giving him high grades after he stopped doing any kind of sport in his last 2 years at that dump. Hell if Hargrove wasn't such a fucking beast at sports he would have been told he would have to repeat his senior year with me."

"It's okay Eddie; leave it go." He turned a fake sunny smile with his eyes tightly shut towards Eddie as if to pacify him.

Eddie turned to Steve who had yet to say anything throughout Eddie's diatribe up until that moment. He just continued to robotically make dinner for the party as though nothing was wrong, as though the hurt dripping off him didn't matter.

"I'm not letting this go! They had classes with you, some of which I'm pretty fucking sure were AP classes. If I had the attendance needed I would have graduated last year because of you, Stevie. So excuse me if I'm a bit annoyed that our friends are so blinded by a rumour that they can't fucking see your Salutatorian medal. Hanging. Right. There!"

All eyes except Eddie and Steve's turned in the direction that Eddie pointed at.

And there on the wall, was a framed silver medal with the word "Salutatorian" emblazoned on it. The party immediately burst into chaos amongst each other.

"Now, pretty boy, are you gonna tutor me or what?"

Or it goes something like that, I'm not sure.

#dustin immediately tries to bring up D&D and immediately gets shut down #later they collectively lose their shit when they find out he got into a college #pre steddie #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson