#parx theories

[1-800-haunted]

master parx new era theory thread !!

so i can lose my mind in peace

my interpretation of the storyline -

there are 3 conceptual characters (soulsucker, st*rfucker, and awsten/color3/blue. unclear if st*r and st*rfucker are separate at this time or if st*r is just the shortened name. awsten twitter dn blahblahblah). greatest hits as an album being a kind of tossing and turning sleep cycle in its entirety ends with see you in the future, which in turn ends with "if you could see the things that i see when i sleep, then you'd be paranoid like me", implying that the lyrical narrative of the album was seen while he was sleeping. if he wakes up at ice bath, then what does intellectual property start with? i think that

st*rfucker - the actual start of soulsuckers pov. the perspective shifts from talking about demons in "their limo" climbing up to "my window" in fuzzy to "my limo" and "your window". the plot/plan to take down the former narrator, i.e. 2 sides to every story.

real super dark - absolutely the beatup period. in the clean version, "bullshit" is censored by 2 punching sound effects. the yelling of "i don't know" makes it seem like a violent interrogation??? and of course all versions end in "oh man you don't look so good", soulsucker beat someone to a pulp and took his place basically. im choosing to think its our lovely former narrator, but im unsure whether that former narrator is color3 or st*rfucker. theres also the hint lyric "i feel it up and down my arms and on the back of my neck yeah, it gets super dark when im feeling reject" soooooo. the green highlighted portions of that post also spelled out S T A R.

adding more to this later !! im very passionate abt it i just need to find all of my evidence and notes to add so it will be updated !!

#god i am so good and normal and cool and HNNNGHHHHH #waterparksband #waterparks #parx #parxafterdark2 #parxies #awsten waterparks #awsten knight #geoff wigington #waterparks theory #soulsucker #intellectual property

[capricornparxie]

PARX5 TITLE REVEAL

#my fellow h theory believers how we feeling #waterparks #parx5 #parx #intellectual property

[unholyverse]

awtto toronto is my ryden seattle: a rambling

yeah yeah ik ryden seattle has been debunked but this is similar enough to that and seems more plausible so. bear with me here. thanks to my good friend @filthyjanuary for actually watching all of this go down and having pics so i can be insane about it and write stuff like this lol.

also disclaimer before anyone tries calling me out. i don't actually know anyone in the band and this is all speculation for the sake of good ol fashioned real person fiction meaning don't take this too seriously and don't show this to the band or anyone connected to them. cool? cool.

night one: september 4, 2022

waterparks were on their final opening spots (if you don't count la night 4) of their leg of mcr's return tour in toronto at scotiabank arena.

this was already a strenuous tour despite the short length because not only would this mark parx's first time playing arenas, but it directly followed their run on the sad summer tour that year, putting some extra strain on them. in some of my mutuals' words, awsten was annoying and sounded like shit.

up to this point, waterparks had been doing free meet & greets after shows. however, this would be the only show (besides la) they would not do m&g because awsten posted this on his story at roughly 11:21 pm.

however, he was seen leaving the venue with otto roughly around 10:50 pm. a fan had caught them outside the venue and tweeted about the experience.

(note: the tweet embeds have timestamps in UST; these tweets were posted on the 4th at 10-11pm EST and the UST version is equivalent to that)

not anything too weird. they just left the set earlier than the rest of the band and crew since awsten was feeling out of it; lucas and geoff were seen leaving during the last song anyway.

the weird stuff starts with the fact that otto flooded the showers backstage (audio taken from this interview).

otto estimates that around 2:00 am, he was scrambling to find custodial staff to help him clean up his shower mess (literally a situation only he of all people would get in lol).

weird though, right? if otto was so concerned with cleaning up that mess, why would he leave with awsten long before he even tried? and even then, why would otto leave the set of his favorite band ever to go with awsten?

also let's shift to the day after: supposedly an anon of mine had met awsten in a starbucks the next day and said he was wearing the same clothes he had wore onstage on the 4th.

they also said he smelled good but he always does

this would align with a couple of things i already thought were likely. there are a couple of starbucks locations in the area, but if awsten and otto had walked out on their own instead of with the crew, they were likely within a short distance of the arena to do so. as you can see there is not only a hotel within walking distance of the arena, but there is also a starbucks within the vicinity of the hotel.

there's no proper way to put this and this is just rpf madness anyway but my theory is: they were sucking and fucking that night and awsten was tired enough after he slept in his stage clothes and sprayed a bunch of cologne on him for his coffee run the next day. end of story.

night two: september 5, 2022

this show would mark parx's last opening slot for mcr before la night 4. my friend said awsten sounded better that night. can you sound better a night after getting dicked down? who knows that's an answer for science.

also after their set, parx were caught watching the show on the floor and awsten was sitting down with otto's hand on his shoulder and it was very cute.

anyway, parx were able to do once final free m&g that night. one thing to note though was otto and awsten's change of clothes between their set and the m&g.

(terrible cropping and sorry to the fan i cropped out)

as you can (kinda) see, awsten is wearing a red tank top and otto is wearing a yellow shirt during the show. however, once their set was over, awsten and otto decided to wear matching mcr merch (and not tell geoff because he's still wearing the same shirt from onstage).

what would make these two do this who knows. they're no strangers to sharing or matching clothes anyway but it is sorta funny to me how they're matching like a couple and leaving their own bandmate to third wheel that lol.

was something in the air between awsten and otto in toronto? maybe, but it's not like we'll ever know. i can only imagine what they could've done.....

#awtto #rpf #welcome to my twisted mind

[i-am-arkham-asylum]

why do i so desperately want a petekey fanfic that spans from like 2005 to current era? I want to explore like fuck it - what if they DID get together and then STAY together?

like imagine the fucking cryptic ass messages pete wentz would be leaving if he was in a relationship he couldn't directly talk about. how does that change IOH? what does the track list look like? pete has always been cryptic with the lyrics of his discography but how does that change when you can't expicility talk about your relationship or you're going to get banned on radio play? what are the heartbreak songs about only getting to love someone out of the spotlight?

how does that change everything that went down at paramour? if mikey doesn't marry alicia does he go on project revolution and meet lindsey?

I can't help but think about how lonely the 2007-2009 era was for FOB. Reading joes book and hearing about how they stayed in these impersonal apartments and then watching pete's MTV cribs episode where like, everyone lives at your house that has one single couch in it because you don't live there. What does the timeline look like when you get to build a life? When you take care of another person? do pete and mikey get to buy a house and live it it when they can? is there a cribs episode where you have to hide half of the things you own because it absolutely connects you to mikey way in a way that is waaaay more then friends?

i want some good old fashion taylor swift-eqsue sleuthing from alternate universe tumblr/twitter commenting on how pete and mikey are in the same place. Alt timeline where when mikey is playing with parx pete goes to support his husband and gets spotted so now you have several people commenting on "why the fuck is pete wentz at a waterpark show?" then cue like several theories about parx becoming a DCD2 band.

i think there is a lot of heartbreak potential in both of them having to decide if you want to sit next to your spouse at an award show or if you are going to pretend to be coworkers. when mania goes up for a grammy does pete want to thank mikey as is husband? even when he wins he looses, there is a relationship that is always out of the lights of the sun.

#petekey

[waterparksdrama]

starting a conspiracy theory that everything before Fandom was ghost written because the lyrics are so bad now I refuse to believe the same person wrote all of Parx’s discography

it was written by awstens ghost (he died in the boner pill incident of 09) but then he was resurrected and came back wrong so now we have this - iz

[coiajm]

my theories on parx’s most recent post!

as all of us parxies know, waterparks uploaded the following picture, a neon green gradient background with three horizontally parallel black dots… interesting..

now, this photo could mean many things. there has been a recent discussion, especially on twitter, as to what this is, some of which I have thought of in the following:

a new album? already? that’s highly unlikely. personally, I doubt it.

a deluxe addition of intellectual property? hmm.. maybe.. however, parx has never even come out with a deluxe addition, let alone really mention one.

a new demo album? this is my personal favorite, considering it does line up with what awsten has said in the past when IP was competing with metallica on some buttfuck british charts..

a new tour announcement? maybe new dates? maybe asia tour dates!? (we can only hope, sending all my love to parxies who live in asia ❤️‍🩹)

you know, all of those technically are all in the realm of possibility.. but maybe that’s not it? they do say, “all good things come in three”, hmm.. kinda like the three horizontally parallel grenades in double dare!?

these kinda leads into the next theory..

is parx coming to an end!?

I’ve heard some theories in this already, even from when before IP was even announced. sure, it gets annoying, but it also gets to my head.. I truly doubt that they’re disbanding anytime soon, but what if..?

after all, three dots does usually represent the end of something, it also represents silence, a disappearance..

but hey, that’s me just thinking the worst, right? (haha, right..?)

a connection to fandom.. perhaps?

our beloved third studio album! our favorite hatred spiked album ! that also revolves around .. green ? neon green ? cough cough.

(if i’m being honest, intellectual property does have kinda the same energy as fandom. lyrically wise, that is. but out of all the albums, those seem to match the most.)

but..

the STARS!

now riddle me this, motherfuckers, why would the stars only return for the IP era ? why weren’t the stars there before fandom, now that we think about it.. and the weird thing is, the stars only came back in the era that was HINTING green .. green like FANDOM! FANDOM WITH THE STARS. BITCH!?

what could this mean?

I mean, It could easily mean that we’re just having another green era? but why would awsten repeat a colour? that’s right, he wouldn’t. would he? i’m spiraling..

I mean, his star makeup at four chord was smudged, and that was the first time too, does this mean we’re fading away into another era? another green era?

otto was a hint all along..

going back to “all good things come in three”.. do y’all remember otto’s cheek makeup?! literally the same as the photo.

(omg.. otto solo album 😍 he’s my bias)

(…i’m joking...)

yeah, there’s really no theory here.. just the fact that these mfs were hiding it on otto’s CHEEK. damn. sneaky bitches. I guess it is weird.. geoff had a heart (which now that i’m thinking.. could be another sign..), and otto had three dots?

my last theory for now!

this is less of a theory, and more of me pointing out the obvious. (the obvious that we never saw.)

awsten was sporting neon green all the time. EVERYWHERE!

seriously, how did we not see it? we’re so fucking out of touch that we just okayed awsten having a neon- *gags* neon green phone case!? nah.

just look at this:

also, maybe this is a reach.. but i don’t think so.. so, our last era was GH, right? rainbow hair? well.. look at the colour of his phone case then..

DING DING!!

It’s red! just like how RED was the next era. so, this leaves me no choice to believe that his next era will (maybe?) be green..? again..? hm, weird..

SO. sorry if that was all over the place. this was more just for me to unrot my brain a little about this! sorry!

love youuuu 🫧

- arlo

#waterparks #waterparks band #parx #parxies #parx fandom #awsten knight #awsten waterparks #otto wood #geoff wigington

[livingdeadvamp]

hi!! So do you remember when Parx was teasing the IP album board?? YEAH I found it and it has space for 16 songs which means 4 more songs are to come!! Song titles are censored but do you think #16 could be called Soulsucker because that would be so..

WAIT CAN YOU SHOW ME THE PIC???

I do think we're gonna get a song called Soulsucker!! But idk if they'd be doing All This for just 4 more songs? Tbh I'm not sure what's happening, which I love!!! My theory is they're doing this extended era thing so that they can release more songs and have them still listened to. Awsten said that GH having 17 songs was too much and meant some songs were overlooked (COIA YOU DESERVED BETTER 😭), so I'm guessing this is the way to release a load of IP era songs without the same thing happening. Which IS SO COOL like the band know what they're doing!! Ugh I love parx

[heystephen]

luke combs. I’ve been like ‘oh I feel like I should get into his music’ bc I’ve been out of the country scene for A While (literally missed an entire keith urban album and he’s one of my faves) and I keep seeing everyone listening to him and being like oh I might like!!! now the theory I have is that I see ppls characters shine into the songs they write and care about enough to sing. like I’m def drawn to the genuine ones and I feel like as a parx fan and swiftie you might relate, idk, but seriously—I’ve not listened to any of his songs and idk whether to bother. but is he douchey in them? and obv this isn’t a moral issue but are they shallow? ignore if you aren’t familiar with his discography but if you are I’d love to hear what you think

as far as luke combs goes, i really loved his 2018 album, i haven’t listened to anything he’s put out since then (no particular reason, i just haven’t!!) but i thought it was a really genuinely beautiful album and a decent break from all the dude-bro-country that was really popular at the time (like florida georgia line and stuff??)

#i got mail* #faithfromanewperspective

[otto-wood]

What do you think of the IP2 theory??? 

i really hope it’s a sister album, but i think it’ll be some kind of extended version of ip.

we need a folklore/evermore in parx land!! this seems like it really could be gearing up to be that 🤞🏼that’s what i want if i was choosing.

what do y’all think?? and what do y’all want also??

#anon #ask Aly

[randombubblegum]

the fact that otto is still with grace makes me wonder what kind of person he really is. like he seems quite sweet and kind but tbh without him having social media or knowing him personally, it's kind of hard to know for sure. and i really cannot imagine he can't see past grace's bad behaviour so maybe it just doesn't bother him as much as we would expect? idk its just wild to me that they could be together for the better part of a decade and for otto to still put up with her behaviour if he had an issue with it? truly a mystery

i have done more deep mindbendingly philosophical thinking on this subject than plato and socrates and descartes and kant all put together dude. i cant figure out a way it makes sense. all my theories are only 3/4 formed at best.

my working theory is: hes a loyal and dedicated romantic partner who doesnt feel like he can up and leave, and grace reinforces this with her penchant for manipulation and guilt tripping to get what she wants. and she CANNOT lose the parx connection (in her mind) bc shes built her entire brand and frankly personality on it. so she will do whatever it takes to keep otto dating her and shes repeatedly demonstrated a complete lack of shame self-reflection or remorse so “whatever it takes” could be……. pretty bad. otto also probably doesnt feel like he can leave her bc grace has essentially no family and barely any friends, plus hes already enmeshed her into his immediate family, and i speak from experience when i say how difficult it is to pry a partner out of your family especially if theyre pitiful, ESPECIALLY if your family is really nice.

also, a lot of graces bad behavior is only catalogued online where otto cant see it, so whatever story she wants to feed him (“people are sooo mean to me for no reason!” “people hate our relationship for no reason!” “people are mad at me and i didnt do anything wrong!”) he really has zero way to fact check or even get any context for. he doesnt see the things she says about him online, or the fights she has with specific parx fans where she threatens to make otto hate them for “being mean” to her. LMAO. he only has how she treats him to go off of and if she says that using him like an atm or a trophy or an item is normal then who is he to argue really?

none of us know otto and he doesnt have social media so we have precious little info about who he is as a person….. but like, theres no way all the interviews and all the casual candid vids of him and all the testimonials from ppl who DO know him could just be fake? so what is it with this ONE thing. and maybe he DOESNT tolerate or like her behavior and we just dont see the fights or his misery, its not like shed ever show us. lol. i hope they never get married

#this question plagues the brightest minds of our generation #mail time! #neg

[skyblue-ringpops]

reintroducing myself because it's been a while...

yeah sorry I disappeared 😭 but I'm (possibly) making a comeback!! so here we go

I'm ems (em/emma is also fine!!), I'm 19 (turning 20 2/13), and use she/her pronouns.

as for what I'll post... maybe some incorrect quotes, hcs, rambles, theories, writing, etc.

fandoms!!

cruel summer (seems to be my main rn)

glee

b99

new girl

stranger things

schitts creek

90210

heartstopper

teen wolf

hsmtmts

mcu

dps

musicals (my fav is bare)

taylor swift

bands (badflower, parx, palaye, etc)

I'm sure there's plenty more but that's all I can think of right now 😭 anyway!! it's nice to see you all again :)

#cruel summer freeform #glee #brooklyn 99 #new girl #stranger things #schitts creek #beverly hills 90210 #heartstopper #mcu #dps #teen wolf #hsmtmts

[twinkskeletons]

apologies if you don't want anymore asks about this but it sucks that parx has really fallen off x_x in my opinion i feel like there's a correlation between some of their songs becoming Huge on tiktok and the downgrade in quality,, it's not a perfect theory because songs on fandom Did have cringeworthy lyrics but it was tolerable (for me at least) and now i haven't even listened to anything new from them </3

loll it’s ok i’m always down to discuss my parasocial enemy awsten knight. and yeah fandom for me was when i started to be like oh.. this isn’t good huh. these lyrics r pretty bad and kind of an asshole way to talk abt ur fans.. i did listen to greatest hits which was 90% a train wreck but had some decent songs (fuzzy <3) and now i haven’t bothered with listening to anything from this current era more than once. don’t think i’ve even heard fuck about it actually i saw those tumblr user boss ass lyrics and just thought yeah i’ll sit this one out -__-

#tragic honestly. the eps dd entertainment were soo good and now we’re stuck with this garbage #this is my panic split except nothing even happened to the lineup the main guy just got stupid :( #well there’s other bands #answered #parx

[rrxnjun]

lol yeah most ppl who started off as an army but again most of them didn't stay an army bc their music just flipped (?) like what happened to them dissing capitalism and the 'ideal society' :( dkfhg my army phase was weird but memorable bc i had a lot of fun w my friends. bts was my first k-pop group and tbt that was the time i understood how k-pop fandoms aren't the same as a regular fandom and that k-poppies are a whole new breed.

NOO I DON'T GET STICKER like the vocals are beautiful i'll admit but i can't stand that flute music. it's wacky and experimental but definitely not for me dfhfdhkj even my friend just got randomly obsessed w sticker a while back so i think it's a really catchy, possessing the people by causing a brainrot sort of a tune🥴

#bar and renjun are one and the same in a parallel universe theory lessgo jhhjg btw kai from exo has the same mbti as you (infj) as for nct idrk (damn their pyramid employment scheme) i only remember yangyang's bc intj and hyuck's (enfp) bc a.he's an extrovert in a sea of introverts lol and b.two of my other friends are enfps too.

HELP NOT DOGFOOD okay haven't really been curious ab eating any animal food bc i remember watching this one part in a movie where this guy accidently eats a small portion of dog food and gets sick. really sick. that scene scarred 6 y/o me. period.

YESS KYUNGSOO IS MY BIAS THE LOML <33 i became an exo-l right after seeing love shot. that song's just 💃🏾💃🏾 the critic in me has been trying to a find a bad exo song for the past 2 years but hasn't succeeded idk if it's just me but all of their songs are way too good 🤧 FKJGHDF I LOVE BAEKHYUN'S VOICE and bambi >>> but my personal fave from his solos is love again from delight and DO NOT EVEN GET ME STARTED WITH SUPERM I MISS THEM SM. the group's so special to me BC DKFJGHDF IT'S LIKE THE CRAZIEST CROSSOVER EVER OKAY LIKE EXO, NCT AND SHINEE TOGETHER ?? still can't believe i got to listen to mark lee rap after a taemin and baekhyun bridge. omg do you have a fave superm song?? also yes i'll help with the exo-l-ification <33 compiling the recs in a playlist as i type this

RAINBOW MY BELOVED >>> nct dream albums aka collection of my comfort songs and that's why they're my fave unit. still lose it every time i listen to puzzle piece it's so sweet and the lyrics are so sappy but i love it sm <3 wow soulmate au based on electric hearts 👀 hmmm i haven't really checked the lyrics for that one brb after seeing them

haha i'm an sm stan through and through. started stanning one (1) group and ended falling far almost all of them lmaoo the company sucks but the artists 😭😭 gods i love them. i haven't really seriously looked into aespa tho it's a work in progress lol. as for skz samee i don't really vibe with them anymore and legit know ab the group's activities bc of tumblr </3

YES I'M INTO STEM. it's crazy the math has more letters than numbers and the physics and chemistry has more ridiculous looking math than my math textbook but there are like super tiny moments wherein i realize why i actually like doing what i'm doing. we all need smth to keep going right :') anyway im concentrating on graduating from high school in one piece rn bc it sucks !! bigtime !! and omg psychology sounds so cool :0 i haven't learnt anything bio related for the past 1 year and i kinda sorta miss it

i'm only actively keeping up w 5sos (and slowly getting into parx <3) rn but i do go back to my emo phase every once in a while bc idt i ever left it 💀

p.s. just remembered that india has banned tiktok so i can't really see the video 😭😭

literally!!! i must say that i enjoyed dynamite, but everything that came out after was just meh for me 😭😭 and it was a bit of a jump for me too, but ive been in fandoms since i was 12 so its like 7 years now,,, so joining the kpop world was just one step further from all the stuff in the 5sos fandom.

STICKER BRAINROT idk whats the sudden obsession brooo😭😭 multiple people experienced it tho, ive seen ppl on tiktok as well, so i think its a worldwide phenomenon. the fLUTE IS SO CATCHY i wanna learn it i have a recorder at home and i think that will do the job.

#bar and renjun soulmates agenda. 😭 kai is an infj?? brooo thats so cool!! i really enjoy his first solo album i gotta listen to the second one soon sjssj. idk whats w me and exo solo music but i think i lowkey know more than their group music its so embarrassing😭😭 chanyeol's tomorrow was my top played song on spotify last year its so special to me :') also hyuck's such an enfp i couldnt imagine it any other way for him. for the dog food, i was just curious abt the taste ??? didnt really taste like much tho, but i do admit it looks tasty 10/10 would try again

loveshot *lip bite* i fucking love that song. the choreo >>>> i remember showing my brother the mv and he was amazed with how good looking they all were 😭😭 and their music truly is too good broo!!! i love power. serotonin boost song. i will never skip that song when it comes on shuffle. also baekhyun's voice truly is something else. the moment i listened to un village for the first time, something inside of me changed. my personal favorite is cry for love btw!!

SUPERM >>> i miss them so much omg 😭😭 mark as the maknae is the cutest concept. the videos where they quiz each other abt themselves live in my mind rent free. my favorite songs are no manners, together at home, better days, wish you were here and tiger inside 💪😩 wbu?

SEND THE EXO PLAYLIST ASAP ‼‼ THIS IS A SERIOUS REQUEST.

dream is my comfort fr 🤧🤧 i always get so upset when i listen to dear dream. i dont think i'll ever listen to it without being in pain jssjjs. PUZZLE PEACE SUPREMECY!! its so sweet i love the guitar <33

I legit admire people who are into STEM and who are good at these omg my brain cant comprehend science 😭😭 i only went to business school to escape the STEM subjects. im rooting for you!! i graduated in may and trust me it was difficult i didnt sleep for two weeks before my final exams but it was worth it in the end!! i felt very accomplished hhh so hang in there!:)

my emo phase comes and goes in waves i honestly. love it. its always so random as well😭

awwh yeah i heard you dont have tiktok there :((( im sorry. id send it to you as a video but idk where 😭

#💌ask #ni 🌱

[sunflowerinc]

to stay on brand for the new era, the set design for the upcoming parx tours should include a trail of red paint smeared across the stage. yknow, bc of color theory :)

#and to represent the blood of ottos victims /j #waterparks #shitpost #text

[waterparksdrama]

pretty sure most waterparks fans have either A) some kind of sensory thing (often ADHD/autism) where the production and overall sound scratches their brain just right or B) borderline personality disorder or some breed of attachment issues which makes the lyrics are extremely relatable. the A fans are more likely to enjoy greatest hits and their newer stuff while Bs are often nostalgic for their first two albums. that’s my theory, anyway

Pathologizing Parx Fans with Anon - iz

[overbearingstruggles]

Hi omg your blog is the best, thanks so much for all the ATL content / theories etc. You're such a kindred spirit too! I also really dislike Greatest Hits and think it's Parx's worst album but I literally have never managed to find anyone who thinks like me. Anything I've seen is people saying it's their best album but I don't see it AT ALL. So I'm glad you do. Funeral Grey is awesome though and gives me hope for Parx5. Take care lovely! Thanks again for this blog <3

Hi hey thanks for being around!! The Greatest Hits songs refuse to stay in my brain or differentiate themselves and I’m relieved to be getting feedback from others being lukewarm at best on it.

#answered ask #@me