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Right now I’m overwhelmed with just… Loki. I love Him. I don’t know how to express it fully… As I’m typing this, or rather, sitting here Struggling to think of the words… He suggests, a bit of a ritual for Him. A sit down. A blot? I don’t know what the word is. But He wants something formal. Something that acknowledges who He is.

You know, with Him being my partner, with us being together, I am rarely so formal. Worship doesn’t quite describe my dynamic with Him anymore, though I do and always will give Him the acknowledgement that He deserves respect and honor and is a god and such… Always. Always.

I suppose I’m still learning to find that balance which is right for me personally… In that, first and foremost He is the one I married. But sometimes He comes in like tonight, loving as ever, careful not to scare me, and yet so incredibly raw with how MUCH He is…. How widespread and.. powerful yes but that’s not the way He wants me to say it… It isn’t a show. It’s just.. overwhelmingly sacred and He’s so serious and it reminds me that not everything is a game. His love for me is very real. He is very real.

He is Loki and this is not something to be taken lightly. That being said, He and I spend most days in comfortable casual conversation and loving moments. But sometimes He comes in like THIS and I am reminded of how many sides of Him there are. And I only feel more love for Him because of it.

He seems happy with my conclusions here. It’s alright to reblog this… Take care of yourselves.

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Why does it feel like I’m about to do something which will shatter a lot of a notions i’ve stealthily kept to myself which have been slowly but surely leading to my downfall and now that I am at the gate before entering into the place where I can finally express myself, be unapologetically myself, I am pausing to think of what I will be leaving behind? It’s only liberation, will be an adventure for sure but an adventure and challenge that I’m meant to, bound to, fated to, with all the millions of cells in my body acting together and craving for expression, take up. It’s scary but every bone in my body says it feels right.

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