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daisy (english profrry x TA!yn)

part one of english profrry is here!!!!!

word count: 6.3k

BIG content warnings: massive, glaring warning for an inappropriate relationship. y/n is a graduate student in this and of legal consenting age, but there's an age gap of four years between her and harry. she is his TA, which means there's a big power imbalance between them. bc this is fic we'll pretend it's romantic and all very consensual but if this is triggering to you in any way, DO NOT READ IT. it's not worth hurting your mental health. also, if anything remotely like this happens in your personal life, IT IS NOT OKAY.

other CWs: small smut scene at the end (m masturbation with descriptions of m receiving oral, slight cum play), y/n alludes to having seasonal depression but it's never outwardly said (just be aware since the descriptions of it could be triggering to some!), a bit of angst but nothing crazy

with all that out of the way, if you still choose to read, I hope you enjoy :) love you all lots!!

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. . .

Professor Styles is a dick. 

That’s what the entire English department said when it was announced that Y/N would be his newest teaching assistant for the spring semester.

They all sneered at her, throwing what they pretended to be caring warnings her way, claiming that he was impossible to work with and he didn’t even actually need a TA, he just liked picking students to embarrass. With their noses upturned at Y/N but not actually offering any kind of advice, she left the small English building shortly after the Dean unveiled the new schedule for TAs, anxiety bubbling in her stomach and thick, salty tears in her waterline. 

She knows Professor Styles doesn’t have the greatest reputation on campus. She actually actively avoided taking any classes with him throughout the duration of her bachelor’s degree, and even as she chose to stay on to enter her first year of graduate school, she picked any other available professors over him.

He was known for his less-than-personable demeanor and the way he picked apart students’ essays, leaving them questioning their entire life path. Y/N has never felt much insecurity about her career — she’s always wanted to go into English, maybe opting for a small but impactful job in publishing or editing — but having a professional ruin her writing sounded… well, awful. 

In reality, Y/N didn’t have much of a choice when it came to her teaching assistant preferences. She needed a job that wouldn’t take up too much of her time. Her first semester of grad school was difficult and stressful. All of her friends graduated and went on to cool jobs all over the country, while Y/N just stayed in the same apartment. She was homesick for her family and walked through a campus every day that reminded her of a better version of herself — one who had a flourishing social life and excellent grades. Just a few months of working on her masters degree had worn her down. 

Despite the slight dip in her grades from university to graduate school (an expected change, her advisor had explained), she was still recommended as a TA for the English department in the spring. She’d really been gunning after Professor Rooney, a kind, middle-aged woman who had spent years working glamorous jobs in the publishing world. She had connections everywhere and was incredibly sweet, and Y/N knew she would feel comfortable working in her sections for the semester. All winter break, she imagined how wonderful it could be; that maybe it was the huge win she needed after such a shitty fall. 

But Professor Rooney didn’t choose her. Professor Styles did.

Even with a promise of a reasonable stipend contingent on the completion of her TA position, Y/N’s world felt like it came crashing down just a little bit — but she knew better than to complain or blubber on about not getting her way. Instead, she chose to just get through it.

In the final days of winter break, Professor Styles emailed her to meet in his office the day before classes began. He didn’t ask if she was back on campus or if she had a good break. Y/N wanted to resent that, but chose to swallow it down. 

When she got to his small office in the department, she gently knocked on the open door, signaling her arrival. He peered up from whatever book he was hunched over on his deck, straightened his posture, and checked his watch. 

“You’re late.” he said flatly, shutting the paperback with a force she didn’t even know was possible. With furrowed brows, she glanced at the lockscreen on the phone she held. 

“You said 10:30, right? It’s 10:30 now.”

“On time is late,” he muttered, folding his hands on his desk, “Early is on time.”

She swallowed, her lips parting like a guppy. He rolled his eyes and motioned to the seat on the other side of her desk. Quickly, she took it, placing her tote bag at her feet and making a mental reminder to arrive at his classes five minutes early from this point on.

“Right, so you’re my TA, then?”

She nodded, “Yes, for the spring semester.”

He hummed, though she couldn’t tell if it was a sound of approval or discontent. He moved his computer mouse over the surface of the university provided mouse pad, making his computer buzz to life. With an awkward silence settling between them, the sound of the mouse clicking was the only thing that filled the dim office. 

“You just graduated from the English department last spring,” he said, eyes scanning over what she now assumed was her student file, “3.8 GPA. That’s fine.”

She blinked at that, resisting the urge to balk at him. 3.8 was .2 away from a perfect GPA. It was more than fine.

“You didn’t take any classes with me during your time as an undergrad.”

“Um, your sections were always full—”

“I don’t really care what your reasoning is,” he cut her off, continuing to scroll down the screen. A lump formed in her throat but she tried to swallow it down. Nothing sounded more embarrassing than crying in front of Professor Styles. “And now you’re getting your masters in English with a concentration in Feminist Literature. That’s an unusual one. Why?”

She’s surprised he’s bothered to ask her a question, so it takes her a moment to form a cohesive answer on her tongue. She’s flailing a bit and she knows he can tell, based on the unamused expression on his face. 

“I’ve read a lot of literature where there’s a female main character and she’s just used to state a point or some sort of backwards lesson that was considered modernized for the time,” Y/N speaks softly, picking at her nails in her lap, “I’m interested in studying that more.”

“What kind of literature?” Professor Styles instantly fires back. 

“Well, I wrote my undergraduate thesis on The Scarlet Letter, but I’ve also been thinking about basing my graduate capstone on Ophelia from Hamlet.”

He makes that annoying humming noise again, and she’s still unsure if he’s pleased or thinks she’s an idiot. She wasn’t unused to the latter — a lot of snobs in the English department thought it was stupid of her to care for critiquing older pieces of writing from an argumentative, feminist perspective, even if they acted like The Odyssey was an “absolute must-read” for everyone.

(It’s not. Y/N thinks The Odyssey is dumb and boring, but she’ll never say that, especially not to Professor Styles.)

“Right, well,” he lifts a white ceramic coffee cup to his mouth and swallows briefly. She glances down to see he’s drinking hot black coffee, and her lips furl into a quick, involuntary wince. “You’ll be with me three days a week. You are to attend the daily lectures — Mondays and Wednesdays are the shorter section and Friday is the long, three-hour one. Helping out with grading and holding office hours will be your primary tasks. If you fall ill or need to take a day off, I need at least 24 hours notice. If I receive any complaints from students, you’re out. Otherwise, it should be a fine semester. Any questions?”

She shakes her head, hoping he’ll show some inkling of delight at her quick ability to understand and process. Instead, his lips remain in a flat line and he nods, taking another sip of his coffee. 

“You can go now. See you tomorrow.”

She scrambles to leave his office as quickly as possible.

. . .

Professor Styles barely speaks to Y/N for the first few weeks. 

It’s unsettling in a way, especially because she doesn’t know if she’s doing a good job. She thrives off of reassurance, but every time she hands him a neat stack of newly graded papers or drafts, he simply waves her off with an, “alright, thanks.”

If she’s being honest, it makes her want to try even harder, though she’s not entirely sure why. She has the urge to claw her way to the very top of Professor Styles’ repertoire of students and assistants — a need for perfectionism that can only be quelled by the person least likely to give it to her. 

And it’s driving her absolutely insane.

She wants to ask, straight out, “am I doing an alright job? Do you need anything more from me?”, but she’s positive that will only make her glow with insecurity. He’d probably laugh in her face and call her a baby for needing his acceptance.

It eats her alive as she sits at the front of the lecture hall, watching his female students stare at him with hearts in their eyes as he discusses the politics of Ursula Le Guin. It bugs her only more than he's one of the most attractive people she's ever seen, always impeccably dressed with long, ring-clad fingers.

Grumbling, she realizes that she probably looks just as pathetic, so she quickly straightens her posture and runs her fingertips over the mousepad of her laptop so it glows back to life. She’s supposed to be going over the grades of the students’ first essays — her and Professor Styles were meeting after class to discuss them in the event that anyone needed additional assistance for the upcoming paper.

She busies herself with that until he ends class, creating a list of a few names that would potentially need to be met with one-on-one. He doesn’t say anything as he gathers his own materials from the lecture, and she follows him out of the hall and to his office just as silently, carrying her laptop in one hand and her tote bag on her shoulder. 

Professor Styles’ office is always cold and dark, never failing to send a shiver down her spine when he unlocks the door. Today, her shoulders shudder involuntarily and she pushes her sweater sleeves down to cover her hands. With a rumple in his eyebrows, he sits down. 

“What’s the matter?” he asks. 

Y/N snaps her head up in surprise. She doesn’t mean to look shocked, so she quickly revises her facial features in an attempt to look collected. 

“Oh, it’s just cold,” she says, waving him off nonchalantly, “I’m fine.”

“Yeah. I think this winter has been especially brutal.” 

His reply especially dazes her — she’s unsure if that’s an attempt at making small talk, something Professor Styles has never done with her before, but she instantly nods her head, as if she’s speaking with a toddler who’s expressing their emotions for the first time. 

“Yeah, I think so,” she says softly, “The snow is awful to walk through.”

“Do you live far from campus?”

She shakes her head and sets her laptop and planner on her side of the desk, across from Professor Styles and his things. 

“No, just a 10 minute walk or so, but I don’t have a car.”

He hums at that — that stupid, unassuming hum that contributes absolutely nothing to the conversation. She wonders if she’s in her head about it, but she feels his eyes linger just a beat longer on her face before tearing them away. He licks over his teeth as he taps on his laptop to wake it back up. 

“Right, then. Did you go over their grades?”

As she pulls her things out from her bag, she tries to ignore the small pit of disappointment in her tummy from Professor Styles shifting their conversation back over to class. 

. . .

That weekend, Y/N thinks she’s hallucinating as she meanders up and down the aisles at Target. 

She’s not really looking for anything in particular. Sometimes she just comes here for something to do. Her bank account isn't exactly flowing in a way that permits her to buy all the cute home decor she gazes at, which is why her basket currently consists of the following: pads, a new pack of her favorite gel pens, cookie dough, and a lip balm that she’ll probably put back before she checks out. 

It’s another harsh, cold day out, the freezing temperatures refusing to let up as the days of the month flit by. This is Y/N’s least favorite time of year — when winter sticks around despite the holidays being long gone. All that’s left between now and spring is pesky snow and fake Hallmark holidays, and she yearns for the days where she can walk to campus and admire the tulips peeking out from the damp soil. By then, she’ll be closer to returning to her hometown for the summer, where she’ll likely get a job for a few months working in the local library or bookstore.

It’ll be good — she’ll get to see her friends and spend time with family and save up some money, and maybe the hopefulness of life warming up in a few months will be enough to get her through this semester.

And as she’s daydreaming of brighter days, that’s when it happens — when she thinks she must be fully hallucinating, because as she strolls down one aisle in particular, Professor Styles is standing there, his bottom lip pinched between his fingers as he stares at space heaters. 

She’s never seen him off campus. Sometimes that happens since a lot of professors live close by, so it’s not unheard of to pass by an advisor or faculty member at the supermarket or through the park. But seeing Professor Styles here feels… illegal, somehow, especially given his casual, dressed down attire. He’s wearing what looks to be a cozy sweatshirt and a pair of athletic shorts, despite the temperature nearing the 20s today. (Y/N is bundled up in three sweaters, a jacket, a scarf, gloves, and leggings beneath her jeans.) White socks go just above his ankles, and the running shoes on his feet make her wonder if he’s insane enough to actually be working out in this weather. 

She must be analyzing his form for a beat too long — maybe it’s the shock from it that still hasn’t worn off — because he feels her gaze, eyes veering to his peripheral, realizing that his teaching assistant is standing there as if she’s waiting for permission to enter the aisle. 

“Hey,” she blurts out when she realizes she’s been caught. 

Confused by her frank, laidback greeting, he lifts his head to face her. “Hey.” he echoes awkwardly.

“Um, sorry.”

He quirks an eyebrow and Y/N’s body heats with embarrassment. “Sorry?”

“Sorry… I-I should’ve just walked away when I saw you,” Y/N quickly attempts to revise, but she realizes it’s just making her sound stupider, “I was just surprised to see you here.”

“In a public store?”

“Right,” she nods curtly, turning on her heel, “Have a good rest of your weekend—”

“Wait, did you need something down here?” he rushes out, almost as if he’s fearful she’ll leave. She pushes the thought down but parts her lips nervously, eyes scanning over the contents on the shelves. She doesn’t need anything, she was just putting off having to brave the cold weather on her walk home.

“Yes,” she says slowly because, once again, she’s suddenly stupefied and enamored by the prospect of small talk with Professor Styles, “I needed… lighters. For my candles.”

He nods, a quiet “ah,” sounding from his lips, and they stand there like they’re doing some sort of parallel play; Y/N pretending to look at the long, safety lighters while Professor Styles continues to look at space heaters. She wonders if he for some reason is pretending, too, but then he’ll squat down to look at the features on one box, making a tsk-ing noise with his mouth, and straighten back up to analyze a different model.

When he finally decides on an option that’s best fit, he grabs the box and places it in his cart. Quickly, Y/N plucks a random display of lighters and throws them in her basket.

“Hope you found a good one,” she mutters out dumbly, feeling the need to interject one last sentence into their silence. He glances down at his cart, then at her basket, and then, finally, at her. 

“It’s for the office,” he says. “You said it was cold.”

“Oh. Yeah.”

“This should help with that.”

“Sure, yeah. I have one at home, it helps a lot with the draftiness.”

“That’s what I’m hoping for.”

“Maybe you can get an extra lamp in there, too. Spruce it up a bit.”

A wrinkle forms between his brows, “What do you mean?”

Y/N wishes the ground would swallow her up whole.

“Nothing! I just meant— like, sometimes it’s a bit cold, and with the weather, it can get dark, too. The winter’s tough, don’t you think? That’s all I meant, I’m sorry—”

“No, you’re right,” he says with a decisive nod. “You’re the only other person that really spends time there besides students. Do you want to help pick one out?”

“Sure, okay.”

They walk in silence to the lighting display, which is filled with a myriad of different options. Professor Styles looks semi-overwhelmed by it all and Y/N has to bite her lip so she doesn’t smile too widely at his confused expression. She points to a simple, inexpensive standing lamp.

“I think something like this would be good, in the corner or something. Just for some extra brightness.”

“Is that the one you like?”

Y/N doesn’t have strong lamp preferences, especially when it comes to a space that she’s not even living in, but for some reason, it seems important that she says yes. So she nods her head, flashing him a small smile. He returns it, and she realizes that’s the first time he’s ever smiled at her. 

“Okay. I’ll have this stuff set up for when you come in on Monday.”

She swallows, feeling the mountain of adoration in her stomach grow. She shoves it down. 

“Thank you, that’s really kind of you,” she says.

“Sure. I’ll see you then. Have a good rest of your weekend.”

She hides in the lamp aisle for another 15 minutes, until she’s positive he’s left the store. 

. . .

Professor Styles and Y/N are working in their typical silence when he says something that makes her jaw nearly drop to the floor.

She thought that after their short but personable interaction at the store, things would change a bit. Maybe he would feel more comfortable talking to her outside of monotone grunts or the occasional “are they failing my class?”, but things remained the same. When she came in that Monday, the space heater and lamp were both on and running as he promised, but it was as if nothing happened. 

It irks Y/N to no end.

She assumes that he sincerely doesn’t care for her, which she supposes is fine considering kindness or approval aren’t part of the job description. That’s why she’s shocked when he says it a few weeks after the weekend they saw one another in public. 

“I think you should ask to change your advisor to me.”

Y/N chokes on her spit, hurriedly coughing into her hand so she doesn’t spray saliva all over his desk. Once she recovers, he’s staring at her expectedly, as if what he said was completely and utterly sane. 

“Sorry?” she asks, “Why would I do that?”

She doesn’t mean it to sound rude, but it’s a genuine question. Typically, there’s some type of rapport between a grad student and their advisor, and she and Professor Styles have absolutely none of that. 

Professor Styles clears his throat and folds his hands on his desk. “Because I got my masters degree in the same thing, so I spent four years studying exactly what you’re studying. I think you’ve been doing very well as my TA and I would like to advise you.”

“Why would you ask me why I was studying that, then?” she blurts out, confusion apparent on her face. “The first day we met, you told me it was unusual.”

“It is.”

“But you studied it.”

“I did.”

“So why would you say that?”

Professor Styles sighs as if this is the most boring and obvious conversation he’s had all day. 

“I wanted to hear you defend it. See why you’re interested and make sure it’s not all bullshit.”

Y/N shakes her head, “So you were playing some kind of mind game with me? For fun?”

“It wasn’t a mind game, Y/N. I just wanted to know why you’re interested in it.”

She bites her lip and looks down at her laptop screen, which has since gone dim since they began talking. If she’s being truthful, she’s grown tired of Professor Styles. Up until now, she was positive she was doing things wrong and he just didn’t care enough to correct her — only to find out that he wanted to work with her even more. It made zero sense.

“Are you going to do it, then?” he asks, tearing her from her thoughts. Her expression pinches as she rolls her lips into a thin line. 

“I don’t know.” she answers in a watery voice. “I like my advisor, and I assumed you didn’t like me very much.”

His eyebrows furrow. “Why wouldn’t I like you?”

“You barely utter three words to me on a daily basis and never tell me if you’re happy with my work.”

Professor Styles scoffs, leaning back against his leather computer chair. 

“You need regular approval from me to know whether or not I like you?”

“Yes,” she admits, anger building in her chest until she can’t help but blurt out what she’s thinking, “It’s how I work. If you were a good professor, you would’ve asked how I best function at the beginning of the semester. Instead, you ignore me for fun.”

“You don’t think I’m a good professor.”

She sighs and shakes her head. “I didn’t mean that. I think you are. I just don’t think you’re the best at managing teaching assistants.”

He shrugs, but she notices a slight wince in his features. “We can’t all be good at everything, can we?”

“Right,” she mumbles, drumming her fingers on the edge of his desk. When he doesn’t reply, she shuts her laptop and stuffs it in her bag. “I’m gonna go then. I’ll see you next week.”

He’s silent as she gets her things together and pulls her jacket on, wrapping her scarf around her neck and zipping it on top of her sweater for extra warmth. As her boots carry her across the length of his office and to the door, he stands from his seat. 

“Y/N,” he says, and she turns to look at him. “The deadline to change your advisor is next Friday. I hope you’ll still consider it.”

. . .

That evening, all Harry can think about is his sweet, quiet TA. The one who he undoubtedly offended earlier today — he cringes at the thought of it, replaying their conversation over and over in his head. He can’t stop thinking about the upset look on her face. When she asked if he was playing mind games with her, he wanted to get down on his knees and beg for her forgiveness. He never meant to hurt her, not one bit. 

He sighs as he runs his hand through his hair. He’s had reruns of some shitty sitcom on since he got home from work a few hours ago. He didn’t want to be alone with his thoughts, but even a laugh track and ‘90s era merriment couldn’t distract him from thinking about her. 

He considers the things she said about wanting his approval. He’s never been well-liked in the English department, likely because of his rough exterior. He’s not immune to the things he hears from students and faculty, about how he’s grumpy and someone to be feared, even if he didn’t even intend to come off that way. In all honesty, he never wanted to be perceived in that matter — but once his reputation began to precede him a year or two ago, he figured there was no use in trying to convince people otherwise. 

That's how it had always gone, anyway — in high school, when he started experimenting with different styles of clothing, everyone assumed he was gay. He'd desperately tried to refute those claims, even if he wasn't completely sure of his sexuality himself. But no one cared — they'd already made up their minds, and it seemed useless to attempt to change their ways of thinking.

And when people spoke here, mumbling about how mean and terrible he was... well, what was the point?

Y/N was the only person he cared to win over, and it was eating him alive.

So much so that he made the blind decision to maybe, possibly cross a very clear boundary between professor and TA. Despite Y/N being of legal, consenting age (after looking at her student file, he found that he’s only four years older), he still attempted to prioritize maintaining a professional relationship with every one of his students and TAs. 

He couldn’t help himself with her, though. He knew it was bad — he could feel his heart thumping quickly in his chest, the logical part of his brain telling him to stop while he’s ahead, but he couldn’t. Not as he grabbed his laptop, logged into his work email, and composed a message to her student address. Not when his fingers danced over the keyboard and resisted the urge to implore her to start fresh with him. Not when he clicked ‘send’ without even proofreading to make sure it sounded appropriate, not creepy or weird.

He pushed his laptop away and got up to pour himself some wine, attempting to rid himself of any lingering guilt.

. . .

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Subject: Today

Time: 9:57 p.m.

Hi Y/N, 

I wanted to apologize for how I acted today. It wasn’t kind of me and you deserve far better than that. I understand if you have no interest in changing your advisor. Please know that whatever you decide, your TA position will not be in danger, should you choose to continue working with me.

Thank you for all of your hard work. You’ve been doing an excellent job and I’ve very much enjoyed having you this semester. Have a good weekend.

x Harry Styles

. . .

On Monday, Y/N’s mind is whirring. 

It’s not because the semester is nearing midterm season, although that’s part of it. It’s because Professor Styles emailed her an apology at almost 10 pm on Friday evening, and she’s repeatedly read it over at least 50 times since receiving it. 

She didn’t reply because she wasn’t sure what to say — and, most shockingly, he didn’t sign it as Professor Styles. Instead, he ended the message with a kiss, for crying out loud, followed by his name. His name! 

It’s all she’s been able to focus on for days, to the point where she contemplates not showing up to his lecture on Monday. But she’s better than that — she’s stronger, and she’s smarter, and she doesn’t want to hide. 

She avoids Professor Styles’ gaze all throughout his lecture, instead focusing on grading first drafts for the class’ midterm paper. She knows she’ll have to sit with him in his office afterwards, and her stomach churns at the thought. In some way, she feels ashamed that she said anything to begin with. Her comments about him not managing TAs properly have made her shrivel into a mortified version of herself, and she’s shocked he didn’t fire her on the spot. 

Worst of all, she hates the way her heart jumped into her throat when his name popped up on her screen on Friday night. She craved the feeling, hoping he would, for some reason, do it again, even though she never responded. She wasn’t playing hard to get by any means, but the fact that her brain even veered in that direction proved one thing to be true: she has a big, fat crush on Professor Styles.

The knowledge sits like a rock in her stomach, especially as they walk in silence to his office after class. The air between them feels awkward, but she’s not sure that there’s ever been a time where it hasn’t felt odd between them. When he unlocks the door, she quietly steps inside, her heart skipping a beat at the space heater and lamp already turned on. 

Usually, he keeps the door open while they work. Today, he shuts it, the soft click of the lock making her jump. 

“Can we talk?”

Y/N’s throat dries but she nods, gripping the strap of her tote bag close to her arm. She turns to face him, and for the first time ever, she notices that he looks… nervous.

“About last week. I’m sorry, but I’m even more sorry for emailing you that on Friday,” he rushes the words out like he wrote a script out and was waiting to perform them, “It was completely inappropriate, and I got the hint when you didn’t reply.”

“The hint?” she peeps out, her voice squeaky and embarrassing. 

“Yeah,” he says, crossing his arms over his chest, “About not wanting me to advise you and… you probably found my email to be weird, right?”

Quickly, she shakes her head. “No, no. I.. I actually haven’t given much thought to the advisor thing, but I didn’t think it was weird. I just didn’t know how to respond.”

His eyebrows furrow, “Why’s that?”

“Because I felt guilty about what I said to begin with! A-and you could’ve fired me if you wanted to, but instead you apologized and said that I’m doing a good job—”

“You are.”

“Exactly!” she exclaims frustratedly. “I didn’t know how to respond to that.”

“To me being… kind?”

“Yes.”

He blinks at her, the crinkle between his brows deepening. 

“I’m just not used to it, Professor Styles.” she says with a sigh.

“Harry,” he corrects.

“What?”

“My name is Harry. I don’t want you to call me Professor Styles.”

Y/N ignores the quickening of her heartbeat and shifts her stance from foot to foot. 

“Why are you doing this?” she eventually blurts as she crosses her arms over her sweater-clad form. She’s not sure if she detects an inkling of pity in his face, but if she does, she wants nothing more than to run for the hills and never return. For some reason, the thought of Professor— Harry feeling bad for her makes her shoulders shudder, a prickly sensation tip-toeing down her spine, as if shame is completely and utterly eating her alive. 

His lips part in a quiet sigh. “I just… I spent the weekend thinking of you and feeling awful for the way I’ve treated you.”

Thinking of you.

I spent the weekend thinking of you.

Her stomach turns as his words echo throughout the chambers of her brain. But then there’s a click — like the second part of the sentence just ekes its way through, planting a seed of self-doubt and insecurity. And she backs away like he may explode at any moment. 

“You shouldn’t— no, that’s alright,” she shakes her head, gaze set low on the carpeted floors of his tiny office. 

“Y/N—”

Again, she cuts him off with a shake of her head, raising her eyes to look at him. His expression is pained and she wonders if hers is any better, though she assumes for different reasons: He doesn’t want to get fired for torturing another grad student. She has an inappropriate crush on the professor she works for.

“It’s all good. Call it even?” she rushes out, leaning over to grab her things from her chair, “Fresh start on Wednesday. Don’t mention it again, alright?”

She’s gone before he can stop her. 

. . .

Harry accidentally falls asleep in his office that evening. 

It’s half because he’s absolutely swamped with work, too fearful to email Y/N and add things to her grading pile after the way she all but ran away earlier today. He’s terrified he made her uncomfortable. 

He doesn’t want to return to the quiet loneliness of his apartment, where he’s constantly faced to force the reality of his life: A man in his early 30s with a job that he likes, but no one actually likes him at it. His entire family resides in London and with the exception of a few friends from his schooling years, he’s alone. Especially in the romance department.

His heart aches for Y/N. He realizes it’s a bit dramatic, even slightly taboo given the nature of their professional relationship, but he likes her. He likes her so much that he doesn’t want to go home and think about how badly he messed things up, so he falls asleep face-down on his desk, his cranium wedged between piles of pens and a Post-It list of to-do’s. 

When he wakes up, he doesn’t know how long he’s been asleep for. The soft, golden light from the lamp is still just barely bathing the circumference of the room, but as he blinks his eyes open, he realizes that it’s silent. He can see through the small frosted window that the hallways are dim, which means it’s most definitely sometime in the evening. 

He feels… somewhat guilty but charged as he wakes from the fog of his sleep, eyebrows furrowing as he stretches his arms out. His neck already aches from the discomfort of his sleeping position and he groans, lifting a palm to sort the knot out. 

And that’s when he realizes it — why he feels as if his body is buzzing, his hands sweaty and his throat dry. He’d woken up in the middle of a sex dream and, like a pathetic teenager, the star of it had been his crush. Y/N. 

He scoffs to himself as he glances down at his crotch where, sure enough, his length is painfully hard beneath the constriction of his trousers and underwear. He swallows, eyes flickering closed. He can remember the exact details of his dream, even if they send a bead of guilt dripping down his chest — they’d been in his office, just like this. She was between his legs, knees pressing into the carpet of the floor, her eyes rounded and expectant as he toyed with her, pretending to guide his cock between her lips only to take it away at the last minute. She pouted every time, a plushy lipped-frown punctuating the words he hadn’t even realized he’d been dying to hear: “Please Professor Styles, stop teasing me.”

At the realization, he’s sent into a frenzy. He doesn’t even think to check whether the door is locked (or maybe if he’s locked in the building, no less), before he’s clawing at his belt and zipper, yanking the fabrics down to reveal a pair of swollen balls. His length stands hard, his eyes nearly rolling back just from the feeling of looping his fingers around the base. He can’t remember the last time he was this pent up just from his own imagination, but it’s not a difficult place to return — not as his head leans back against his office chair, allowing his dream to pick up and take form in full consciousness. 

So much pre-cum is bubbling at the tip that he doesn’t need much of his own spit to lubricate himself. He bites his lip hard to prevent himself from groaning out too loudly, envisioning the way she’d finally suckle around the tip of his cock, looking up at him with proud eyes. He’d gradually help her go deeper, but she’d be excited, willing to bruise her throat for him. She was so good — in his dreams, in real life, she was always so, so good.

“So good, Professor,” she’d pant out, popping off to lick a stripe up the side of his cock. With spit-swollen lips, she’d venture down to his balls, rolling them in the palm of her hands before taking each one into her mouth. In reality, he gasps at that, tugging them in his own hand. 

But what really gets him there is an impossible thought — one that has nothing to do with the silly wet dream his brain conjured while he slept. Her in her own bedroom, her naked form wrapped up in her sheets while he gazed over lovingly, pressing soft kisses along her shoulder and down her arm. She’d giggle breathily before flipping onto her side to face him. And she’d say it — I love you — and it’d feel like heaven. 

That’s what pushes him to finish all over his hand, cum dribbling over his fist as he pants and gasps like he’s just discovered masturbation. His orgasm encompasses his entire body, a few beautiful, peaceful moments of complete pleasure that causes all of his muscles to tighten deliciously. Of course, he envisions her taking all of his cum, licking it up eagerly over his digits, making a show of it — she’d open her mouth, pretty pink tongue out, and he’d watch as she swallows. He shudders at the thought of it, quickly snapping his eyes open and grabbing a tissue from the box on his desk to clean himself up. He’s immediately back to his grumbly state as he does, irritated that he allowed himself to lose control in such a finite way.

He tosses the dirty tissue in the garbage can and stands up to tug his briefs and pants back up. The clink of his belt buckle is the only sound throughout the small room, so he jumps when a knock sounds on the other side of his closed door. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, someone knows, I must have said her name, I’m such a fucking freak—

His eyes widen when the person speaks: “Profess— Harry? Are you in there? It’s Y/N.”

#writing #English profrry #harry styles #harry styles writing #harry styles fic #harry styles blurb #harry styles angst #harry styles imagine #harry styles oneshot #harry styles one shot #harry styles one direction #harry styles fan fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fan fic rec #harry styles fic rec #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #one direction #harry styles fanfic rec #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x oc

[jarofstyles]

shy y/n accidentally calls harry daddy bc shes cockdrunk while theyre fucking and harry is so taken back that he cums on the spot 🫣

Omg omg omg omg

Patreon

----

Harry was convinced that Y/N was his soul mate well before it happened.

Perhaps for some, it could be considered intense, but he knew what he wanted in life. He knew he loved her by their 4th date, he knew he wanted to marry her by the 7th, and now they'd been committed to one another for about 6 months. It was incredible to have someone you just.... know is yours.

They were a bit opposite, Y/N and him. Harry was a lot more outgoing, a lot more experienced in the ropes of life, but especially sexually. Y/N hadn't done much of anything prior to Harry, and he had the honors of introducing her to a whole plethora of things. Lots of kinks they'd dipped their toes into and Y/N gave her feedback on.

She was shy beyond what he was used to, but he found it endearing. He didn't mind working her through her shyness and building her up so she felt comfortable enough to speak to him and tell him what she liked, what she wanted to try. So far, she had gone off of what Harry had admitting to liking- at least the tamer stuff- and he was more than happy with her progress. All he cared about was her comfort and pleasure.

She liked spanking with his hand, wasn't too fond of a a paddle, thoroughly mewled when he had slipped his thumb over her tightest hole, enjoyed that he was in charge and she was his sweet little baby. They'd gone slower but Harry had been more than honest with her about his likes and his preferences. Y/N appreciated honesty more than anything, even when it hurt because lies were her number one hate. The sweet girl didn't dislike much, but dishonesty was one of them.

When she had sniffed out that he had been hiding something, he was quick to fess up that he'd been a bit anxious that it would be too much or too odd for her given this conversation had happened only after the 3rd time they'd had sex, so he had admitted that he preferred a certain honorific- Daddy- and that he wouldn't ever make her feel bad for not wanting to call him that if she so chose. Y/N hadn't said much about it since.

Not until tonight.

Deep inside, Harry watched her puffy, pretty cunt spread open as she took his cock. it was sticky with her arousal and his spit, her ass recoiling when his thighs hit it. It was a glorious scene, one of the sexiest things Harry ever had the privilege of seeing with his own eyes. She was making a mess on his length, a mess of glistening slick and creamy smears that were settling on the base making the sight almost too much for Harry to handle.

Then there were the moans, the sweet, delightful little 'uh's' that left her Scarlet painted lips. He'd taken her out on a date to a lovely little restaurant and when they arrived home she had kissed him deep, leading to this moment right here. Her dress discarded across his bedroom floor and her face resting on his pillow as he fucked into her needy cunt. Sweet calls of his name, for more, for him not to stop, she was getting more and more vocal as the pleasure began to raise and he was doing everything he could to make it even better for her.

"There we go, my love." He purred. "Can feel it, you're about to cum f'me again." The encouragement always did it for her, his hand squeezing her plump ass as he pounded away into her. "Perfect little pussy for my perfect girl. M'so obsessed with you." He wanted to give her another, knowing she was going places she hadn't been before by her babbling and clenching at his pillow but she hadn't called for him to stop- if anything, she asked for more. Harry couldn't get enough, so he was holding off his orgasm just to see her do it for him.

"M'gonna, m'gonna cum, m'gonna- please, can I?" Watery eyes looked up at him, the perfect version of his destroyed sweet peach as mascara smeared slightly under her eye. "Can I cum, can I please? M'good, m'so good, m'a good girl, I need to." Her rambles only made him love her more, despite her knowledge.

"Go on, my sweet girl. Let go f'me." He cooed, continuing the pace as he watched her unfold in front of him. He could feel it, feel her rippling around his cock and the gush of her arousal as she let out a squeal. Relishing in the feeling of her trembling under him, when she said something that caught him off guard. One, whimpery, pathetic sentence that had him almost keeling over.

"D-Daddy, want your cum, let me have it, please...."

As soon as it hit him what she said, he couldn't stop himself. Balls pulling up and cock throbbing as he emptied hot cum into her, a low groan leaving his mouth as it stayed open. Feeling her orgasm start to wane but pussy stilll clenching, milking him of his cum, he was careful as he fell over and held himself on top of her, hips stuttering as he tried to gather his bearings.

His Y/N, his sweet, delicate Y/N had just called him Daddy while begging for his cum. There was no way his orgasm could have withstood it. She probably would be slightly embarrassed when she realized what she said, but he was in heaven. He hoped it showed an inner want to call him that, that it was in her mind when they were intimate because she could see him like that. At the end of the day, all he wanted to do was take care of his precious girl, make sure she was cared for and comfortable.

"There she is. My perfect angel." he panted. "Daddy's here, m'giving it all to you now." Lips pressed to her sticky cheek, nudging his nose lovingly against it. "M'all yours, forever."

#jarofstyles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfic #harry styles smut #harry writing #harry styles imagine #harry drabble #harry styles blurb #harry styles writing #harry smut #harry fluff #harry angst #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x you #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles au #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfics

[luxeacademia]

Brindleton Bay Taylors Version Pt. 01: Wildest Dreams Jewelry & Style Clothing Boutique by luxeacademia

So I am a big Swiftie and recently had this idea of making Brindleton Bay builds inspired by 1989 TV. Here is the first build. I have a few more planned and I am super excited about it! I also chose to photograph this build during the winter because it gave "snow on the beach' vibes. Hope you like it! -

Presenting "Wildest Dreams" and "Style" – where retail therapy meets Hamptons charm.

"Wildest Dreams" Jewelry: Discover an array of sparkling gems and accessories that will make your Sims' wildest dreams come true. From delicate necklaces to shimmering rings, this boutique is a haven for those who appreciate the finer things.

"Style" Clothing: Dive into the world of fashion at "Style," where coastal Hamptons aesthetics blend seamlessly with Taylor's 1989 era. Explore racks of chic outfits and timeless ensembles that exude sophistication and style.

Come explore our retail paradise, where Sims can indulge in shopping sprees that capture the essence of coastal luxury.

Lot Details:

Name: Wildest Dreams & Style Boutique

Value: 1,275,717

Type: Retail

Size: 20x20

World: Brindleton Bay

Location: Ragdoll Refurb

Other Info:

Thank you to all CC creators!

Enable BB.MoveObjects before placing

Please do not reupload or claim as your own

Feel free to tag me if you use it. I would love to see it!

CC list:

@pixelglam: Coastal Art | Ralph Lauren Folded Sweaters

@pinkbox-anye: Coffeeshop | Magorna | Senna | Sophie

@awingedllama: Nostalgia Living

@bbygyal123: Minimal Prints

@bergdorfverse Bags: 1- 2- 3- 4- 5 - 6

@charlypancakes: Lavish

@felixandresims: Chateau Part I. | Chateau Part. VI. | Colonial Part III. | Georgian | Grove Part II. | Paris Part I. | Paris Part II. | Paris Part III.

House of Harlix: Baysic | Orjanic Part II.

@harrie-cc: Coastal Part I. | Coastal Part II. | Coastal Part III. | Coastal Part IV. | Coastal Part VII. | Coastal Part VIII. | Spoons Part I. | Spoons Part II.

@joyceisfox: Hamptons Bar Counter | Simple Live Part II. | Summer Garden Part II.

@lilaccreative : LC Jewelers

@littledica: Letters

Max20: Poolside Lounge Pack

@peacemaker-icemaker: Seema Living | Adirondack Love Part I. | Elsie | Moroccan Cement Tiles | Hamptons Getaway | Hamptons Hideaway | Painted Brick | Splendid Narrow Paneling

@pierisimm : Davids Apartment The Bedroom | Domaine du Clos Part II. | Domaine du Clos Part III. | MCM Part I. | MCM Part II. | Oak House Part I. | The Office | Woodland Part I.

platinumluxesimsx :Dior Wicker Basket Bag | P-Luxe Stiletto Court Shoe

PralineSims: Concrete Floor

Ravasheen: Watt's Not To Love

Sims4Luxury: The Hamptons Collection

Simplistic: RH sink | RH Barstool | Luxe Dining Chair

@somik-severinkaSeverinka : Functional Champagne | Drink Tray

@sooky88: Hydrangea

@syboubou:  Sleek | Shopping | Rideaux | Paradis | Laundry | Hortensia

Ruby Red: Romantic Gazebo | Glam Bathroom

Gallery ID: luxeacademia Download on my Patreon here.

Enjoy ♡

#sims 4 #builds #sims 4 build #sims 4 cc #new simblr #sims 4 simblr #ts4 simblr #ts4 #ts4 build #sims build #the sims 4 build #ts4 gameplay #the sims community #simblr #sims4 #thesims4 #the sims 4 #cc finds #the sims #sims #sims 4 download #mbuilds #brindleton bay #retail #hamptons #sims 4 screenshots #sims 4 screenies #my patreon

[alltimefail-sims]

This inviting trailer community just off the Moonwood River and across from the local library is an affordable option for any Sim looking to settle down in a small town. Inhale the fresh scent of woodland pine under the full moon, and pay no mind to the creatures lurking about and the incessant howling coming from every direction…

INFORMATION & DOWNLOAD BELOW ↓

Packs I Used - Furnished Version:

Packs I Used - Unfurnished Version:

This lot is completely CC Free and labeled as a residential rental lot type. There are two versions for you to chose from: one that is fully furnished and one that unfurnished and therefore using significantly less packs!

Here's where I placed it in my save:

TOU: All I ask is that:

You do not reupload and claim the build as your own (yes, even if you tweak it a little…)

You tag me if you use it! I would love to see this in other people’s games and saves, that’s why I’m sharing it! ❤️

Additional screenshots are on my Patreon post. This build has been play-tested, but please let me know if you run into any in-game issues!

DL: Patreon (always free)

+ @pancakesrealty, @publicvanillabuilds

#moonwood mill #ts4 #simblr #ts4 residential rental #ts4 rental #ts4 build #ts4 build mode #ts4 download #the sims 4 #sims 4 #ts4 lots #ts4 DL #ts4 moonwood mill #ts4 werewolves #mybuilds #atfs

[redgoldsparks]

September Reading and Reviews by Maia Kobabe

I post my reviews throughout the month on Storygraph and Goodreads, and do roundups here and on patreon. Reviews below the cut.

The Princess and the Grilled Cheese by Deya Muniz 

Lady Camembert is the only child of Count Camembert, but as a daughter she cannot inherit unless she marries. She refuses, and after her father's death takes up a different life in the capital city, far from her hometown: she pretends to be the male heir to her father's title. This feels like the perfect solution, except then she meets Princess Brie, and as feelings begin to develop between them, Cam despairs that her secret identity means she can never be anything more than friends with the Princess. This is a beautifully drawn book, sweet and silly, full of cheese puns and historical anachronisms.

The Yakuza’s Bias vol 1 by Teki Yatsuda 

Yakuza member Ken Kanashiro's life is changed when the daughter of the clan leader he works for takes him along to a kpop concert. Ken is moved by the kpop idol group's commitment, hard work, passion, and loyalty to each other and their fans. His introduction to fandom, and new social media friends, bring a breath of fresh air into his violent and dangerous life... and like most fervent fans, he starts trying to convince the people around him to stan the group to greater or lesser success. This manga series is very much in the same tone as Way of the House Husband but I appreciated the slightly longer chapters and the growing ensemble cast. It's a silly concept but with moments of genuine feeling as it shows how loving something can connect you to a whole new community.

Of Thunder and Lightning by Kimberly Wang

This is a beautiful, meta deconstruction of battle-robot manga; it plays with POV, with format, and theme. Two corporate nations struggle for dominance in a ruined world. Each spreads propaganda about the other; each has developed a pop-star like AI robot avatar, which battle each other in televised combat with custom costumes and snappy catch phrases. These robots, Magni and Dimo, exist only to destroy each other, but also find in each other their only equal. They both savor their violent encounters, but both are pushed by their creators and handlers to destroy the other. The story is half devastating elegance, half tongue-in-cheek satire. This title is most easily available through the publisher's website and I highly recommend it.

Blackward by Lawrence Lindell 

Four friends, Lika, Amor, Lala, and Tony, bonded in a bookclub over being Black, queer, weird and punk. They clearly see the need for a community space for folks like themselves, but struggle with how and where to build that space. After their first attempt is ruined by trolls, they ask for guidance from a local bookstore owner and zine fest organizer. So the idea for the Blackward Zine Fest is born, an event to showcase creativity, make new connections, and maybe even find dates. This book doesn't shy away from the negative sides of existing and creating as a minority in public, but it is also a celebration of friendship and community and the power of comics!

Assassin’s Quest by Robin Hobb read by Paul Boehmer 

What an exciting, explosive end to this trilogy! Fitz starts this book as low as a man can be, having returned from near death, with nearly every person who has ever known him believing him dead. He has to learn how to be human again, and learn how to care, and figure out his plans now that he has hypothetical total freedom. But the Red Ships are still pounding the Six Duchies shores, and Regal has withdrawn the strength and wealth of the Duchies inland. Verity is still missing on his endless quest. The beginning drags a little, but after the mid point of this book it is CONSTANT action and adventure, with so many twists and turns, and such a payoff at the end. If you like high fantasy, I highly recommend this series, and I'm so glad I chose to revisit it this summer.

I Thought You Loved Me by Mari Naomi

This is a long, thoughtful look at a friendship breakup, told through prose, letters, diary excerpts, collage, and comics. Mari met Jodie in high school where they bonded as rebellious teens seeking freedom from parental and academic rules. They loved the same music, both dropped out of school, and moved in the same circle of Bay Area folks for years. They were best friends- until Jodie cut Mari out of her life suddenly and unexpectedly. Years later, Mari was still trying to piece together what had happened, from lies, misunderstandings, secrets, affairs, communications lost in transit or responded to by the wrong recipient. Friendship breakups can be equally as devastating as romantic breakups- sometimes even more, as there's no societal norms on how to mourn them, and because we often expect friends to remain in our lives forever. This memoir was honest about how memory fades, how easy it can be to remember only the good or only the bad of a person colored through a specific lens, but also hopeful about the possibility of reconnection. No memoir is over while it's characters still live, and this one took more twists and turns than I was expecting! Beautiful and thought provoking.

Enemies by Svetlana Chmakova 

This fourth installment in the Berrybrook series is just as charming and warmhearted as the previous volumes. This one focuses on Felicity, an artist who struggles with time management and deadlines, and with comparisons to her hyper-organized, science-fair winning younger sister. Wanting to prove herself, Felicity joins a competition for kid entrepreneurs. But coming up with a winning idea proves more difficult than she expected, especially when her partner keeps suggesting completely impossible ideas. Also, one of her best friends from elementary school stopped talking to her and now glares daggers at Felicity and she has no idea why. It's hard to keep your head up in middle school with all of the swirling emotions, homework, personal projects, and still maintain high scores in the most popular new online multi-player combat game. But Felicity has the love and support of her family- all she has to do is be willing to ask for help.

Skip by Molly Mendoza

The art in this book is absolutely gorgeous, and the page layouts are stunning. The story opens with a child, Bloom, and a nonbinary adult, Bee, surviving in a post apocalyptic world. But Bee goes off to help a stranger and then Bloom falls through an Alice-in-Wonderland like rabbit hole into multiple different trippy, strange settings were they are generally much tinier than all the other inhabitants. There's a nice through line about friendship and trusting yourself, but ultimately I found the story too ungrounded and loose to have a deep emotional impact.

Alexander, The Servant and The Water of Life book 1 by Reimena Yee

I am so impressed by the scope, artistic skill, and inventiveness of this work! The author weaves together multiple, at times conflicting, tales of Alexander the Great. It's drawn in rich colors and a wide variety of styles, many of which reference specific historical manuscript traditions from medieval European to Islamic to East Asian. I love the way the flashbacks are worked into the frame narrative, I love the shifting art styles, I am awed by the size of this project. And you can read most of this first volume online for free here on the author's website.

Ocean’s Echo by Everina Maxwell read by Raphael Corkhill 

This is a creative and gripping follow up to Winter's Orbit. Set in the same larger universe but focusing on a new set of main characters in a new sector of space, this extremely slow burn romance is satisfyingly dense with military and political intrigue. Tennal is the nephew of the Legislator of Orshun; he's also a Reader, or someone who can telepathically read the emotions and surface thoughts of the people around him; he's also the black sheep of his family, a party boy and general fuck up. His aunt forces him into an army position with the intention of having him permanently mind-linked to an Architect, a soldier with the flip side of Tennal's skill- the ability to control people's minds. Tennal is horrified and begins to think of every possible way he can avoid this fate. But much larger forces are at play around him, from the mystery of a semi-destroyed scientific lab relocated in the middle of chaotic space, lies about the creation of Readers and Architects, and a coup in the making. This book is heavier on the sci-fi elements than the relationship progression, but that suited me just fine and I look forward to hopefully reading more installments in this series!

Sunshine by Jarrett J Krosoczka 

When author Jarrett Krosoczka was in high school he had the opportunity to volunteer for a week at a camp for kids with cancer, their siblings, and parents. Jarrett had no idea what to expect, but he packed his sketchbook and an open mind. The experience changed his outlook forever. He had his own problems back home: a family affected by addiction and absent parents which lead to him being raised by his grandparents. But in the company of children facing life-threatening illnesses his own concerns fell away. He built relationships with some families that lasted for decades after his time at the camp. Painted in soft gray with hints of yellow and orange, this book offers an honest look at families facing the very worst circumstances and still heading out into woods to find community, friendship, and a breath of peace at a nature camp.

The Out Side: Trans and Nonbinary Comics edited by The Kao 

A really charming collection of nonbinary and trans stories! Most focus on coming out, but a few talk about a later in the process piece of trans life, such as getting top surgery. I enjoyed seeing which pieces of the stories echoed each other, appearing universal, and which stood out as unique to an individual's experience.

Hard Reboot by Django Wexler read by Morgan Hallett 

Set far in the future, this sci-fi novella follows a researcher from an extra-terrestrial human settlement on a scientific tourist trip back to "Old Earth". A misunderstanding leads to her accepting a very large bet on the outcome of a mecha battled, and when she losses and can't pay, she has to team up with a mecha fighter to try and win the next round to get her money back. I was able to predict the majority of the twists of this story within the first quarter of the book, but it was still fairly entertaining as a short audiobook listen.

Best. Ceremony. Ever: How to Make the Serious Wedding Stuff Unique by Christopher Shelley 

I just officiated a wedding for the first time in my life, and this book (while cheesy) did actually help me get started writing the ceremony speech. It gave me the general outline of the beats I needed to hit, and some smart ideas of little touches or moments to include. The book is very inclusive of same-sex couples, which I really appreciated. Its also padded out with a completely unnecessary 50 page glossary of terms, so I only really read/skimmed the first three quarters of it, but I'd still recommend it if you are either planning or officiating a wedding.

#reading #book reviews #comics #reading reviews #maia kobabe

[yukidragon]

Remember that pic that voltageous Posted of Jack all angey. Do you think Alice would ever be in similar situation like that? Btw I love your character Alice and all the headcanons and stories that make!

Aww! Thank you so much! I'm really happy that you enjoy my writing, ideas, and Alice. 💖

I presume you're talking about this lovely picture, right? Jack's pose is very appealing, but his expression in particular is striking. Between that, the composition of the scene, and the lyrics, a story is being told that has sparked so many thoughts.

I actually made a short thread on twitter discussing Alice and this picture's scenario. I think this is the perfect opportunity to expand on that idea with a bit of a ramble, and maybe do a bit of writing.

Quick reminder that this fandom is for Adults Only. Mature topics will be discussed like sex, cheating, and such.

In that spirit, let's really look at the picture and talk about it, shall we? I think the main thing that really caught my, and a lot of other people's attention is the look Jack is giving the person standing in shadow in the doorway, presumably MC. We've never seen Jack actually show such an angry expression to his sunshine outside of fan art.

I mean look at that face. Jack is glaring daggers, at his sunshine no less! That is the look of a lover betrayed by their cheating partner if I ever saw it. Sauce does great work with their art and expressions. Full credit goes to them as always for their awesome work.

Speaking of which, consider joining the SnaccPop Studios patreon for more cool art that they haven't shared on twitter. Just remember not to share anything that's privately posted there.

Something I actually only noticed when really looking at Jack's face in close up, he has a slight distortion going on similar to what was applied to his sprites earlier in development. You can really see it in the slight blurring of his red marks.

As was mentioned on the official tumblr, Jack can touch and interact with things the more attached he is to his sunshine. In the demo, Jack picking up MC and making food is treated as a new development, showing how close they've become. MC can't touch him anymore when they distance themselves from him in the "no" route. When they could choose to "not make things weird" and keep Jack at arm's length emotionally, he started to feel cold and distant from them even though he was holding them close.

It was mentioned that Jack was given an intentional 3D/VHS distortion in earlier builds, which I think was to further emphasize that he wasn't quite real. MC is the one making him more real with their love and attachment. I suspect that the blur would've lessened and disappeared altogether as he became more real.

So now we see Jack with a hint of that distortion, glaring angrily up at the person casting a shadow over him in a darkened room. I think we can all guess this is supposed to be MC, and the lyrics give us a very strong hint as to what's going on here and why he's so upset.

It would seem that this picture is implying that MC was out all night at another love interest's place, likely having sex with them. They're choosing someone else to love, and Jack is probably barely keeping himself together as their attachment towards him wanes.

Jack has every reason to be pissed off in this scenario. Not only does this put him at risk, but this would make MC a cheater in the "yes" route. It's debatable if they would be one in the "no" route, since they did have sex, but it would no doubt still sting even if MC just regarded him as a friend with benefits.

It can leave Jack feeling hurt and betrayed. Remember how he questioned what more he could be doing in the "no" route? This is even worse. He tries to give MC everything - his love, patience, understanding, acceptance... even physical pleasure if that's what they want. Even still, they chose someone else to have sex with, showing even that wasn't enough to keep them.

So, yeah, this seems to be Jack having trouble remaining in MC's life while also feeling hurt and betrayed by them... and no doubt possessive and dangerous.

The lyrics might ask where MC was last night, but given Jack's supernatural abilities, I suspect that he knows exactly where they were, who they were with, and what they were doing... or rather who they were doing instead of him.

I suspect that Jack can go greater distances than a normal person can by walking while using his supernatural abilities. He might be able to track down MC or others he's targeted even at a distance. After all, he was haunting Nick for a while with those nightmares. If MC didn't come home one night, I'd expect Jack would go out looking for them.

MC probably got swept up with another love interest while Jack was at home waiting for them. They were late, so Jack went looking for them... and found his worst nightmare. He could've confronted them there and then, tried to stop them from what they were doing, but, as we've seen in the demo, when other people are taking MC's attention away from Jack, he has a difficult time bringing it back to him until they're alone or unless he exerts a little more pressure like the yes/no choice.

Given the situation, MC might have been way too distracted by their lover to even notice Jack... and I'm sure that it was emotionally devastating to Jack.

So Jack goes back to the apartment. He waits for MC, tries to figure out what to do, but he's hurt, betrayed, panicked... What more can he give them? What more can he do for them? What more do they want from him? What can that other man give them that he can't? He has to do damage control, make them feel the need to make it up to him and want to be closer to him, but he's also hurt.

Jack can't even confront the rival at that moment while they're with MC. His sunshine might see. Even if his jealousy and betrayal might make him not care, he can't risk them wanting him to go away.

So Jack waits for MC to come back, to confront them. No doubt he'll play his few remaining cards of guilt for leaving him behind and forgetting him for a night, while struggling to keep himself together, both emotionally and metaphysically.

Finally, when MC comes home the next day, it's to the scene in the picture.

Now... with all that said, considering how I've repeatedly stated that Jack and Alice are my OTP and I want to give them a happy ending in Sunshine in Hell... I think you can guess that this cheating scenario isn't going to happen between Alice and Jack, hahaha.

I did a post before about what a fight between Alice and Jack might look like, and how far it might go. It's very unlikely that it's going to go as far as what Jack's face is telling us here with all that anger he's showing, especially for such an implied awful reason.

For one thing, Alice wouldn't cheat. She wouldn't do it even before Ian cheated on her and showed her just how much it hurts to be cheated on. She also wouldn't be having sex outside of a relationship. Alice is on the aro/ace spectrum. On top of that, she has issues when it comes to sex. Between SA trauma and her first and only consenting sexual partner being, shall we say, less than attentive to her needs... she isn't interested in sleeping with people after the breakup with Ian. She needs to take it slow in order to trust a partner enough with that level of physical and emotional intimacy.

For Alice, sex with another person is something she can only do with a partner that she loves with the intention to make them happy and feel good. Sure she enjoys masturbation, but when other people have been involved, the sex has been, well... not great. The primary satisfaction she got from sex with Ian was his pleasure. Sadly, he never managed to make her orgasm, and it was actually uncomfortable and painful for her at times. She really did herself a disservice not advocating for her wants and comfort, but she didn't want to make Ian feel bad for a poor performance when it was too easy to hurt his feelings. Really, their troubled, one-sided sex life and lack of open and honest communication are a couple big reasons why her relationship with Ian deteriorated like it did.

I've mentioned before in some past posts, but the sexual intimacy Alice shares with Jack is going to start off slowly, and only after they're together in a romantic relationship. Because he takes her needs and comfort into account, she's pleasantly surprised to discover that sex with her partner actually can be pleasant, especially with a partner who makes sure she has multiple orgasms, and her libido increases as a result.

However, this newfound interest in having sex only applies to Jack, since Alice falls into the demisexual part of the ace spectrum. She loves him, and he's her partner. He makes her feel safe and good enough to actually want and enjoy sex.

If someone else hit Alice up for a one night stand, that would be a big pile of "NOPE!" from her. Even a friend propositioning her would make her feel wildly uncomfortable. She's just not comfortable with casual sex or sex without romantic attachment. Without that deep emotional connection of love, trust, and intimacy, sex is something intimidating and unwanted for her.

While I did consider a what if scenario where Alice and Shaun get together, that was a slow burn that took a long time for Alice to trust Shaun that intimately, and she never even knew of Jack's existence. How he would be as a lover and how that would affect her relationship with sex would be speculation best left for another post.

Jack isn't about to give Shaun or anyone else a chance to win Alice's heart when he's around, and with how much he fulfils her needs emotionally, she doesn't feel the need to consider getting into a relationship with anyone else.

Would Alice potentially get together with Nick if circumstances were right? No idea. I'd have to see more of how he interacts with others, especially his partner. I do know that him asking her out at work made her wildly uncomfortable and was definitely working against him. It's hard to say if it could work out between the two in an AU, even without Jack around.

Would Alice ever sleep with Ian again, even if just "for old time's sake" or "to say goodbye" and end things between them for good? Oh hell no. The only enjoyment she got out of sex with Ian was making him feel good because she loved him and trusted him with that level of intimacy. Needless to say, the trust is gone. Even after she tried forgiving him for cheating, she couldn't handle sex with him anymore. Ian is never getting into Alice's pants ever again.

That's all to say that even though Alice might improve her relationship with Ian, stay good friends with Shaun, and possibly befriend Nick if things go favorably... she's not going to think about sleeping with any of them, and certainly not with someone she doesn't know at all. Even then, she wouldn't even consider cheating on her partner.

So this situation of Jack waiting for Alice to come home, furious and upset that he caught her cheating, just isn't going to happen.

It would take a lot to make Jack angry with his sunshine, and I can't think of anything Alice would do to provoke that sort of glare from him.

Now, with all that said, would there be a scenario where Alice didn't come home one night and made Jack worry about where she was... maybe even worry about what she might be doing and who she was doing it with? I think so. Some places don't have landline phones, and Alice can't afford a second cell phone for Jack, so if she winds up unable to go home, she can't call him to let him know. It certainly provides some potential for drama... especially when Alice has a chronic illness that sometimes flares up beyond what her medication can handle.

So, as I said in the twitter thread, it sounds like a scenario just begging to be written out in a flashfic, so how about we do that now, shall we? Funny enough, as I was writing it, I wound up with something of a sequel to a previous flashfic I wrote a little while ago. I hope you enjoy this piece of hurt/comfort fluff between Jack and Alice!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

...

Alice was late. She should have been home over half an hour ago. The dinner Jack made with love in anticipation of her return had already gone cold.

Jack tried not to let the ticking of the clock get to him. He tried not to overthink what it could mean. He tried to ignore the twisting inside his gut that kept him looking at the clock despite himself. It hadn’t been that long since Alice was supposed to be home. It wasn’t strange to be a little bit late like this. After all, that gosh darn manager of hers was always springing overtime on her after she was supposed to clock out, or she had to stay longer to clean up some mess Carol left behind for her to take care of.

But Alice wasn’t at work. She wasn’t a mere ten minute walk away. She left in her car after lunch, saying that she had errands to do without ever telling him exactly what those errands were.

Like a fool, Jack let her go anyway. He let her kiss distract him from asking questions. Her, “I love you,” left him feeling too happy and flustered to think too much about why she wanted to go alone. She promised to be home in time for dinner, but that promise had been broken half an hour ago.

Jack wished that he could call Alice and check on her, find out what was keeping her and when she was coming home to him. He had her cell phone number memorized, but he didn’t have one of his own that he could use to call her, and the apartment had no landline phone.

Where was Alice? What were the errands that kept her away from him? Why was she late? Jack could kick himself for not getting a straight answer before she left, or for not trying harder to go with her. She could be anywhere by now, be with anyone.

Including that darn Ian.

The nightmare from the night before flashed through his mind. Jack could still vividly remember the helplessness he felt trapped behind the screen as Alice kissed Ian and professed her love for the fake pretending to be him. The memory made his insides twist into knots.

Jack gave himself a hard mental shake. “What am I thinking?” he muttered under his breath, chiding himself for the very thought. It was almost as if he was suspecting Alice of cheating on him. That was absurd. How could he, Sunny Day Jack, think something like that of his sunshine? Sunny Day Jack didn’t get jealous or possessive of anyone, and he certainly wouldn’t suspect his beloved sunshine, the sweetest and kindest person in the world, who loved him just as much as he loved her, on the basis of her simply being out late.

He wasn’t a fake pretending to be Sunny Day Jack like Ian intended to do with that farce of a reboot that lied about being the first and only SunnyTime Crew Show.

Ever since Jack heard about the show and Ian’s part in it, he had been on edge, and the nightmare he experienced didn’t help. The only bright spot in everything was Alice. He still vividly remembered the way she comforted him that night, promising to always be there for him as she held him close and sang the sweetest song to soothe away all his woes and worries.

So why wasn’t she here now?

“I better check to see if she’s okay,” Jack mumbled to himself. He promised to be there when Alice got home, but she also promised to be home forty-five minutes ago, so it was only fair.

…

A rest stop was far from an ideal place for a woman traveling alone to lie down in her car, but at least it beat pulling over at the side of the road in the middle of the desert. Unfortunately, Alice didn’t have a lot of options at the moment. At least the tinted windows blocked prying eyes as effectively as they did the scorching Texas sun.

Pain tore her attention away from potential threats outside the car and turned her attention inward. Alice bit back a whimper, instead hissing ragged breaths through gritted teeth as she did her best to ride through the intensifying sensation of jagged blades cutting and twisting through her insides. The pain rolled in like the tide until it flooded her senses and made her eyes sting with tears, leaving her helpless but to wait for it to recede again to something a little more bearable.

Eventually the pain lessened, at least enough that her breathing came a little more easily. Still, Alice took care to move as little as possible from the reclined front seat while she carefully lifted up the cell phone that she held in a death grip. Through watery eyes she saw that ten minutes had passed since she took her medicine.

Only ten minutes. Fuck. It was going to be at least twenty more before Alice started noticing any real difference. She wished that she had better, faster acting painkillers for these attacks, but there was nothing she could do about that now.

Shit. It had been weeks since Alice last had an attack like this. Why did one have to happen while she was out on her own like this? Why couldn’t it happen at home? At least there she wouldn’t be alone and so vulnerable. At least Jack would be there to take care of her.

Alice was supposed to be home almost an hour ago. If it wasn’t bad enough that things had dragged on way longer than she anticipated, her chronic illness decided to flare up at the worst possible timing - right when she was driving down the middle of the highway. It was all she could do to force herself to keep driving until she was someplace at least relatively safer to park.

“Fuck,” Alice hissed as she carefully lowered the phone, wincing how even speaking made her insides twinge in pain. Jack was probably worried by now, and she couldn’t even call him. She was too used to having him always around; she never considered something like this happening. She could kick herself for taking for granted that it had been so long since her last attack.

Helplessly, Alice couldn’t do anything but wait for the medicine to take the edge off the pain. As another intense wave rolled over her, it was all she could do not to give in to the instinctive urge to double over as pain tore through her insides without mercy. She knew well from experience that any pressure on her abdomen would only make this hell even worse. She clawed instead at the seat’s cushion and her thigh in a desperate attempt to distract herself from the pain as she tried to keep her breathing even.

I wish Jack was here.

“Alice?”

Alice flinched at the sound of her name. For a moment, she thought that she only imagined it, but that unmistakable voice came again from just outside the car.

“Alice?” Jack repeated a little louder this time, his worry only increasing. He could feel Alice’s pain leaking through their connection even before he saw the agony twisted in her expression through the car’s tinted window. “Are you okay? Can you unlock the door?”

Relief washed over Alice almost as intense as the pain as she realized that Jack really was there. She tried to keep her movements minimal as she dropped her phone on the center console beside her car keys before pushing the unlock button.

No sooner than Jack heard the click than he threw the door open and leaned inside, practically covering her like a blanket, though he was careful not to put any of his weight on her. “Don’t worry, sunshine, I’m here.”

“Jack…,” Alice forced out through ragged breaths, her voice cracking with pain. “I-I’m s-sor-”

Jack shushed her gently. “It’s okay.” He touched her cheek delicately, afraid of making things worse. “You don’t have to talk if it’s too hard for you right now. I’m not going anywhere, sunshine. Don’t worry… I’ll take care of you.”

Alice held her fist up and bobbed it up and down, which Jack recognized her as signing, “Yes.”

Jack managed a small but encouraging smile at that. “Is it your illness acting up again?” When Alice nodded her hand again, his heart went out to her. He knew about her chronic illness, particularly that it couldn’t be cured. Her medicine managed it most of the time, but sometimes it wasn’t enough to stop an attack from leaving her debilitated. “Do you need to go to the hospital?”

Alice grimaced and brought two fingers up before bringing them down on her thumb in a definitive, “No.”

“I see… that’s good at least,” Jack said, the words coming out in nearly a sigh of relief. “Do you need me to bring you any medicine?” Another negative indication. “I see… You took some already, is that right?” A nod of her fist. “Good, good… Then we’ll just wait here until you’re feeling better.” When her fist moved again in the affirmative, he took her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Don’t worry, I won’t go anywhere.”

Alice returned the gesture, but her gentle squeeze quickly turned into a crushing grip as the pain intensified again. She forced herself to release him, but Jack refused to let her go and placed his other hand to secure her grip on him.

“It’s okay,” Jack said soothingly. “You can keep squeezing me if you need to. If it helps you deal with the pain, you can squeeze as hard as you like.” He offered her a lopsided smile that would have been more playful if his eyes weren’t so filled with concern for her. “Don’t worry, I can take it.”

Reluctantly, Alice tightened her grip on his hand again until her knuckles turned white as she rode through the latest wave of pain. When she could breathe a little more easily, her hold on him slackened, and her mind began to focus on the situation.

How did Jack find her? How did he get here? She was in the middle of nowhere, miles from home. Was this part of his supernatural abilities too?

Upon remembering where they were, Alice felt a shiver run through her, and her eyes darted to the darkened parking lot. She could see Jack with her, someone big and imposing, but anyone who happened to come by would only see a vulnerable short woman lying down in her car, illuminated by her car light. It was practically an invitation to rob her, steal her car, or worse. Could Jack stop someone if they decided to take advantage of the situation?

Jack caught the frightened thought right away. “Hold on, let me get inside.”

Just like that, the car was soon locked and dark once more, with Jack seated in the now reclined passenger seat so that he could be as close to Alice as possible. He took her hand in his and with the other hand he stroked her forehead, brushing sweat and strands of her hair away from her watery eyes.

“There now,” Jack said, his voice soft and soothing. “You’re safe here with me, Alice. Don’t worry, I won’t let anything bad happen to you. We’ll wait here until the medicine starts working. When you feel ready to go, I’ll drive us home.”

Alice furrowed her brow before deliberately raising her eyebrows as she pointed at Jack.

Jack chuckled as he caught the simple signed question. “Yes me, silly. You’re in no shape to drive, and you need to rest. We’ll switch seats as soon as you’re feeling a little better.”

Alice frowned a little, as what she wanted to say required too much movement for her to accurately convey her meaning without the risk of causing the pain to intensify.

Fortunately, she didn’t have to, as Jack picked up on her fears immediately. “Don’t worry, it’s too dark for anyone to see who’s driving the car.” He paused to chuckle. “Or ‘not’ driving.” He bent down to kiss her forehead and smooth the furrows from her brow. “You don’t need to worry about anything like that. All you need to focus on right now is feeling better.”

Alice sighed at the gentle kisses he pressed upon her flushed skin, though her breathing was still ragged and harsh. She nodded with her fist again as she focused on Jack, his gentle presence soothing her far more than the medicine.

Jack leaned back just enough to see his sunshine’s face. He wanted to hold her close, but he knew about her condition, particularly how pressure on her abdomen, especially in the wrong spot, could make it so much worse. It made him careful how he touched her, softly stroking her brow and letting her squeeze his hand until the pain subsided.

When silence settled in between them, Alice grunted. She wiggled her fingers in front of her mouth before pointing at Jack and raising her eyebrows.

Jack nodded in understanding as he smiled gently at her. “Of course, sunshine. I can talk as much as you want. Don’t worry about needing to respond either. Just focus only on me and my voice. Don’t pay attention to anything else.”

Alice squeezed his hand again, but gently and intentionally this time. His voice, soft and smooth, flowed over her like water on a burn. It didn’t magically make her pain disappear, but hearing him talking to her and feeling his gentle touches grounded her, reminding her that she wasn’t alone and vulnerable. She had Jack with her now.

“That’s right, Alice,” he said. “I’m right here. I won’t let anything happen to you, sunshine.” Gently, he dabbed away at the wetness that still lingered in her eyes. “You don’t have to worry about anything anymore. I promise, I’ll always take care of you… forever.”

As the pain started to ebb again, Alice managed a weak smile. She held up a hand in a particular gesture that made Jack’s heartbeat quicken when he realized what she was signing.

“I love you too, Alice,” Jack said before pressing a soft kiss on her lips, which she weakly returned. “I love you so much, Alice… my sunshine.”

The pain radiating from Alice was horrible, and it took all of his acting skills to make sure that she didn’t realize that Jack felt it too. He could feel it even more clearly with how close they were like this, but he refused to leave his sunshine to suffer alone. The worst part was that he was sure that the pain he felt at that moment was only a fraction of what she was experiencing.

“You’re so strong,” Jack said, his voice hushed with admiration. “You’re doing so well. I’m so proud of you.” He kissed her forehead again and was rewarded with a soft, but pleased sigh from her in return. “That’s it, just focus on me. You don’t have to face this alone anymore. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Alice squeezed his hand again in gentle affirmation as she closed her eyes to focus on his soothing voice and gentle warmth.

Despite the situation, relief washed over Jack, and he could feel some of the same emotion coming from Alice as well. A small pang of guilt crept in underneath it, but he hid such feelings from her. She didn’t need to worry about the irrational fear he had before, that silly split-second when a part of him feared the worst, no matter how impossible that was. It felt laughable now to think that this precious ray of sunshine in front of him could’ve been doing anything as awful as cheating on him, not when he could practically taste her love and gratitude for him as clearly as the pain that - mercifully - was starting to wane.

Jack knew that it was silly to let some stupid nightmare influence him like this, no matter how awful it was. Alice didn’t deserve to be suspected of such a thing, not even for an instant, and especially not during a time when she was suffering so much. She needed him. For as much as he hated that she was suffering, he couldn’t help but feel relieved by that simple truth.

A flash of inspiration struck Jack, chasing away his gloomy thoughts. “Oh! I know. How about I sing a song for you? Would you like that, sunshine?”

Alice opened her eyes again and answered with a soft smile and another bob of her fist.

“Now how did it go…?” Jack turned his eyes up towards the roof of the car as he thought back to the song Alice sang for him. He didn’t remember the first part, but he could improvise, making up new lyrics for the same sweet melody that she shared for him. It was their song now, in his mind, and he made sure to let his sunshine know with his version of the lyrics that he would be here for her no matter what storms and pain may come to help her shine bright with happiness.

Alice couldn’t help but smile crookedly as Jack changed the song, but somehow she liked his version better. She made a mental note to tell him later when she felt well enough to speak again. For now though, she let his gentle voice cast its soothing spell over her, filling her with love and slowly chasing away the pain.

Jack continued to sing until he was certain that Alice had fallen asleep. He pressed another sweet kiss to her forehead and used his influence to make sure that she wouldn’t wake up until she was safely back home in bed with him.

“Sweet dreams, sunshine.”

#Sunny Day Jack #Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack #SunnyDayJack #sdj #swwsdj #Headcanon Ramblings #Ask #My Writing #Sauce-y Art

[simnematographygj]

Forest Christmas Home

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More pictures of this build you can find in my Instagram.  

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I'm slightly late but it's never too late (or too early? :D) for Christmas builds.

Here we have small house made after Scandinavian houses but interior, probably, is not that typical scandi :D Even then I absolutely love this place and hope that you'll love it too :3

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30x20 lot (I chose one of the Bri-Bay's lots)

2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms + 1 room (office) that can be converted into another bedroom too

Playtested with bb.moveobjects turned on

CC is partly included, another part must be downloaded manually through CC-list

Fully decorated for Christmas

Required DLC:

Honestly, you need it just for fences, grass and fire pit. You might also need Laundry Day but game don't see this stuff pack if you've placed CC washing machine 

Credits to @pinkbox-anye @sims-kkb​ @ts4novvvas @sundays-sims @syboubou @aroundthesims @awingedllama @kerriganhouse @wondymoondesign @ddaeng-sims @sims4luxury​ and many others. Thank you so much for your awesome CC!

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Download: Patreon (Early Access) | Public access: January, 24th

#s4 #sims 4 #sims #simmer #the sims #the sims4 #thesims4 #the sims cc #the sims 4 #thesims #thesims 4 #thesims4 lot #s4 home #s4 xmas #s4 interior #s4 download #s4 house #s4 home 30x20 #s4 house 30x20 #s4 lot #s4 lot 30x20 #s4 christmas #gordanjohnson

[nyehilismwriting]

Hey! I wanted to ask for your advice. I was a minor part of the IF community, specifically the COG community, back in 2020. Mostly as a reader, but I dabbled in sharing some of my own writing too. For... reasons we are both well aware of, both in regards to COG, the larger IF community, and the start of COVID I eventually quietly left. Now, three years later, I've been quietly picking up writing IF again as a way to share my story with others. I was wondering if you think, in your opinion, it's worth officially re-joining the IF community on tumblr. On one hand, I feel like things have improved in that the larger community has matured (somewhat). I would like to make more friends, get advice, and maybe even share some more of my art. On the other hand, my project as it stands is... very non-traditional compared to a lot of other IFs (IE: No character customization, no romance, focus on a singular story with emphasis on worldbuilding, etc.). So I don't know if I would even be able to build a community around it even if I did officially rejoin.

I've followed your blog since 2020, including Project Hadea (although I think I originally started following you for your urban fantasy project, although I cannot for the life of me remember if that was you or another author!), and thought I'd come to you for your advice.

I chose to send this ask publicly so that you could choose to answer it privately, if you wished, since it is a longer ask. But I'm okay with you posting it publicly if you would like to! Additionally, no pressure or obligation to respond. Have a nice day!

hi there!! thank you for thinking of me - and welcome back! i'm glad to hear you've been writing again<3 it's such a good feeling, especially when you haven't been able to be creative for a while.

i think i'll start by addressing your game itself. personally, I think this community could do with some new blood in the form of games that are non-traditional; some of the best IFs I've played, ones that have really stuck with and inspired me, have been ones without romance, or cc, or otherwise outside of the typical format that gets popular on tumblr. honestly, i think we could all stand to get a little weirder with it. having said that, there is a very clear type of game that gets popular on tumblr (long-form, narrative-driven, usually with romance, usually with some kind of emphasis on character creation), so if you're a number-go-up kind of person (or someone who is susceptible to that mindset), I would be braced for your audience to remain small, particularly when you're just starting out.

that's not necessarily a bad thing. while I do agree with you that this community has grown and changed shape a lot since the late 2010s, and in a lot of ways for the better, it's definitely not perfect. I can't, in good conscience, say that this is the friendliest or most comfortable community: lots of people are absolutely lovely, and very very kind and enthusiastic; however, and this is absolutely not limited to IF but endemic to any online community, there are ongoing issues with Boundaries, and Respect, and the ways people interact with work and authors they're fans of. certainly, when you share your work you're giving up some control, but it's hard to predict exactly how that's going to go, and how the audience are going to react.

not saying this to put you off, but it's something I think everyone needs to be aware of before deciding to share. it's good to remember that you're not beholden to anyone. this is tumblr dot come, and you're quite free to start a blog, decide it's not for you, and delete; you're free to turn off anon, or asks altogether, or to never post anything save for updates; this is not a corporate space (and while there are considerations if you plan to open a patreon etc, but if we're just talking tumblr) and you are not obligated to do or provide anything you haven't promised.

my other bit of advice - and i think one of the ways to keep any interactions as pleasant as possible - is to be honest, and transparent, and manage expectations. if you make it clear what kind of game you're writing, you're less likely to get people who are disappointed that it's not what they were expecting and taking it out on you. likewise, setting boundaries is important.

i can't really tell you if it's 'worth' rejoining: i've definitely questioned if it's worth it, myself. i've seen some people, ostensibly in the same community as me, doing and saying things i find utterly reprehensible, and i've made some incredibly close friends who i adore and wouldn't give up for the world. and, after all, i am still here and answering asks, so i can't hate it that much. communities are made up of people, and like any group, there's gonna be people you can't stand and people you can. it's about finding your corner, and making it a bearable space for yourself.

i can't tell you if you'll have a positive or negative experience; I can't tell you how to control that. all i can say is that this is an online community, and ultimately you can control when and how interactions occur.

finally - again, i'm glad you're writing again! if you decide not to step back into the IF scene on tumblr, there's plenty of devs who keep purely to itch.io or the cog forums and seem to do fine; sharing your game does not necessarily mean sharing anything else. do what makes you most comfortable <3

#i hope this is...helpful #it's not a simple answer; personally i am proud of the work i have done and the interactions i have had #and i definitely can't leave a glowing review for the IF community as a whole but i have my friends and i have my game #and i am happy with those things #there's also always discord servers - the interact-if server might be a place to start if you're looking for more immediate interactions #pyrrouge #long post #anyway i'm flattered you thought of me and i hope this gives you some kind of. idk. something to think about #even if it doesn't fully answer the question

[not-poignant]

What made you decide to host original fiction on AO3? You're the first (favorite) author doing serial original fic online that I think of these days, though I've not dabbled since independent domains were the most common strategy. I'm hoping to make progress on a project of my own in the soon, but am having trouble finding sites without fairly restrictive content policies--are there/were there other contenders for hosting Fae Tales that would have let you go so dark, or is it AO3 or bust?

Hi anon!

I think from your tone, you're starting off with the assumption that I was trying to be a professional writer and then chose AO3, and that's not the path I took at all!! No one in their right mind generally chooses AO3 if they want to make a profit off of their original writing for a lot of reasons, and a lot of fanfiction authors leave AO3 so they can make a profit off their original writing (and some do both - write fanfic under one name, and original fiction under a completely different name. My path isn't even the mainstream fanfic writer's way of breaking into original fiction, lol).

So my journey was basically that:

I was writing fanfiction on AO3 that became quite popular in its small fandom, and I put two OCs (Original Characters) into that story that got especially popular and started getting fanart during the fanfic. A few people at the time said 'I ship these two' and I was like 'eh I don't want to write it.' And then in typical fandom fashion eventually I was like 'okay I'll just give it a try.'

I wrote several PWP hatefucking chapters mostly to see if they even really worked as a couple (they did!) - since they weren't a couple in the fanfic, they were mortal enemies, lol - and these chapters popped off among a very small number of people and I thought 'you know what, these characters deserve an actual story, because I don't want their tale to have a tragic ending' (which it would have done).

So I wrote more of the story, and eventually I got a message from a reader saying 'hey can you open a Patreon account so we can support your original writing, because it doesn't feel fair that we're getting all of this for free.'

So I opened a Patreon account.

And then about 3 years later I thought 'actually...I think I can turn this into a proper job.' And I...tried lol. It's not a very 'proper job' by the standards of people who started original writing purely for income, but it is quite a proper job for me, lol. I still write fanfiction because I love it.

I never chose AO3 as a place to build a career exactly, I just put original fiction there because that's where the readers were who already liked the original characters, and it didn't make sense to put it anywhere else. I also never expected at the time to make a formal leap into original fiction, I was actually planning another fanfic and then got completely derailed because we were all enjoying Fae Tales so much.

I stay there because I can post any fictional content I like pretty much - no matter how taboo - without fear of reprisal from the site or fear of having my account banned etc. for content. I stay because the warning and tagging system is the most sophisticated in the world. I stay because the search system is also the most sophisticated in the world. I stay because I love the spirit of fandom, and the people who find my original fics there already understand reading serials and WIPs and ongoing stories. I stay because I really enjoy AO3 comment culture, which is uniquely different to anything else anywhere on the internet, but especially other free serial sites like Wattpad, Royal Road, Inkitt and more. I stay because having to invite people to come to my Tumblr to see my posts and excerpts and sometimes find out about Patreon is a feature and not a bug, because it means the people who eventually find their way to my Patreon probably want to be there more than the average reader who never needs to leave AO3.

I stay there because Wattpad needs incredibly short chapters and I like longer chapter lengths (and long serials). I stay there because the comment culture of Royal Road is a lot of 'um, actually' folks alongside some decent folks, and you really have to love constant constructive (and not so constructive) criticism even on your most viral stories, and I am baby. I stay on AO3 because my friends are there, and so are many other folks who I enjoy the thoughts and company of.

To my knowledge, the only other place that allows really taboo content officially (i.e. not 'it's against the rules but everyone does it') is probably Ream, which is a subscription site like Patreon. And they're very recent. I will be setting up a mirrored version of my Patreon account there for all the folks who can't access Patreon due to like...credit card / bank reasons.

If you want to write a super dark, taboo serial, there aren't many free serial sites in the world where that's truly okay. I'm going to take some risks on Wattpad soon with the Fae Tales canon and we'll see how we go, lmao. AO3 is particularly unique because it started for many of us fanfiction writers who were getting banned and censored on other fanfiction and fandom platforms (like Livejournal Strikethrough, which was a huge historical event in fandom around censorship), so it literally - in many ways - was invented to protect and give space to the people who are writing adult or taboo fanfiction (and then later also original fiction). It is designed to be a safe haven for those of us who understand that fiction is just fiction when it comes to sexual fantasy content.

In the past year I have considered other dedicated serial sites for my content and frankly I don't believe any of them are 'safe' for me re: the nature of my writing (I don't feel my writing is as dark as some, but it certainly has 'rape as titillation' quite a bit, and pretty broad scale dubcon). Royal Road doesn't suit my genre/s, Inkitt is possible, but I'm not sure if my work will do well there, Wattpad is a risk but is huge and I'm not mad if my account gets banned there, Tapas allows some taboo, but is very clear that it wants no serials intended for the purpose of sexual gratification and requires 500-1500 chapters maximum, which is a bit of a downer for someone like me who has 3-10,000 word chapters, lol.

If you want to be a professional writer of adult sexual/taboo content who makes money off your writing, I wouldn't recommend hosting your works on AO3, I'd recommend publishing novels and when you have enough of a backlist, potentially offering chapters of future novels as early access on Ream (Patreon will actually also ban accounts with taboo content if you're hosting it on Patreon - and while most of us are safe at the moment, they get stricter over time).

AO3 is, imho, a great place for original authors who already love writing fanfiction or reading fanfiction, and already love fandom, and want to participate in the culture with original stories. Readers on AO3 are very savvy, clued-in people who are overall likely to be suspicious rather than welcoming of original fiction on AO3 in general (many refuse to read it outright), and who also can tell when a newcomer author is just there to try and make a profit off them. But they are also some of the most ride or die, wonderful, best readers in the world once they love your work. (I know this from experience as a reader too, lol, I am ride or die for a few authors there myself).

That doesn't mean it can't be done, it just means there's a steep learning curve re: fandom etiquette (thoroughly worth it, do recommend it, it just will take some time - months, not weeks - to feel it out). AO3 also strongly prefers/requires all original fiction there be posted 'in the spirit of fandom' - which has broad interpretations, but it does mean an effort needs to be made to at least understand and enjoy fandom.

But yeah if you're purely professional career focused, AO3 is not a first-line strategy imho. That's why...there's not many people doing it this way - even viral fanfiction authors don't do it this way, anon, when they decide to writing original fiction based off their fanfiction success. Use Smashwords, Ream, your own host site for direct sales etc. there are erotica and dark fantasy authors who are making WAY more money than I am using paths like this.

I love my path, I love it, and I do believe more people could use it and make it work, but I'll be honest with you - I know I could be making more money if I chose different paths, I'm on this path because it's fun.

#asks and answers #pia on writing #pia on publishing #my path is 'oh god i tripped and fell into getting paid for my writing by accident' #'oh shit actually i think i'm going to make this a job' #at no point did i ever make a smart business decision because i was always just #following the readers and what they wanted #because i was (and am) having so much fun with them #i've been making a few more *deliberate* business decisions lately #but only if they don't compromise my ethics and purpose #which means there are plenty of times i've chosen a path that doesn't give me as much money #or *any money* #which is not how most of y'all are doing this dsalkfjasdfa

[destroyerofnations92]

Teaser 'up unto the overturned keel'

Here is a short snippet of chapter two of 'up unto the overturned keel', the first of hopefully many stories that will be posted on my new Patreon, starting December 31, 2024.

───※ ·♛· ※───

“Prince Daemon, this is treason! How dare–

The Hand was cut off by a strong left backhand to the face, sending the Hightower knight sprawling.

“Daemon!”

“I will not be interrupted nor spoken to like that by this little man,” Daemon told his brother, “Harrold!”

At once, the door opened and the impressive knight stepped into the chambers, “My Prince?”

“Take the Hand to the empty chambers across from my brother’s. He is not to leave, nor to receive any visitors.”

Ser Harrold nodded, “Yes, my prince,” and for the second time that day the Westerman’s hand was slapped away by an irate and humiliated Hand, who refused his aid and instead clambered up from the floor by himself, blood trickling down his chin from where his lip had been split.

As the door closed, Daemon merely poured himself a drink – only one – and sat in his armchair, overlooking the grand model of Valyria his brother and king had been building for the past few years.

“I never cared about your peacocking, brother. I knew my place. Your choices were yours. If you wanted to throw feasts and tourneys and strut around with your ugly crown, that was your prerogative,” Daemon began, looking at his brother for the first time since stepping foot in his chambers, “You chose to keep your deceitful and ambitious Hand, rather than appoint me, the man who won you that crown, and I said nothing. You dismissed me from two council offices within six moons at that snake’s urging, and I said nothing.”

“Daemon–

“Let me finish, brother,” Daemon asked.

Upon Viserys inclining his head, the prince continued, “You may believe the lords voted for you because of your pretty eyes or the tiny cock between your legs, but it was me that made you king. It was their fear of my butchering those who stood in your way, their fear of me burning their lands and their keeps, of me killing our cousin and taking the throne by force if need be, that won you that crown.”

Viserys had always felt deeply angered and inferior when those around him mentioned how important his brother had been to his ascension – Aemma, Rhaenys and even Lord Beesbury – but now that it was just the two of them, he could not find the strength to deny any of it, “I know, Daemon.”

“Then why do you renounce me? I have done nought but love you. I have fought for you and I have bled for you, yet you cast me aside every time.”

Viserys lowered his eyes, uncomfortable at hearing how emotional his brother was.

“Your son is dead,” Daemon whispered.

Viserys’ breath hitched and his heartbeat stuttered, “How?”

“He was too small, and seemed sickly and blue upon brought forth from the womb. He was unable breathe on his own. There was little the midwives or Orwyle could do. He died only minutes after he was born,” Daemon chose to give his brother honesty, “Aemma survived. Only barely though. If not for the midwives I had summoned she would have followed him into the grave,” Daemon uttered coldly, “You were about to sacrifice your wife for a son.”

At that Daemon turned to him and Viserys was taken aback by the coldness in his eyes, “It was not like that, Daemon. I had no choice. I had a dream.”

“A dream?” Daemon mocked him, “Please do tell what you saw in this dream, Your Grace.”

A light shone brightly in the king’s eyes, as if entranced, ignoring his brother’s sarcasm, “A son being born wearing the Conqueror’s Valyrian steel crown. A son born amidst the clashing of swords, charging of cavalry, and roaring of dragons.”

“Dreams are warnings, Viserys. Portents from the Gods,” Daemon sneered at him, “To warn us of calamity that is to come.”

“A son is needed. You don’t understand, brother,” Viserys paced in front of the fireplace, nearly pulling all his hair out, “I must have a son,” the king turned to his brother and stared him straight in the eye, in the hopes he understood the direness of his words, “From my blood come the prince that was promised and his will be the song of ice and fire.”

“Heir.”

“What?” Viserys was confounded by Daemon’s single-worded reply.

“From my blood cometh the Heir that was promised and theirs shall be the song of ice and fire,” Daemon whispered, “You are confusing your High Valyrian with the Common Tongue. Our ancestors did not differentiate between man and woman, and as such had near to no gendered words.”

Viserys was baffled, “How…?”

“The old man may have believed that you were the right choice for king, but even he was not foolish enough to think that you would ever be the one fighting these wars,” Daemon elaborated, “He told me mere weeks after the Council. He summoned me to these same chambers, showed me the dagger and demanded I vow to protect you and the House of the Dragon.”

Viserys was dumbstruck. His brother knew of the prophecy and had pulled the rug out from underneath him.

“His arrogance was astounding,” Daemon sneered, “His choices are what weakened our house, yet it was my vow he needed? Nonetheless, despite my disgust at this old and weak-willed man begging and pleading, I made an oath to protect my future king and his kingdoms.”

Silence descended over the king’s chambers, a pin drop could have been heard.

#daemyra #team black #daemon x rhaenyra #fuck the greens #queen rhaenyra targaryen #fix it fanfiction #anti team green #daemon defense squad #prince daemon targaryen #patreon #house of the dragon #world of westeros #blacks vs greens

[handmadehazefromtheheart]

An Engaged Update

I’ve been waiting for a moment of calm so I could wrap up the HH’s goings-ons in a narratively satisfying blog post. Things haven’t really calmed for me, though, so this one will have a lot of loose threads.

Since my last big update, I have arranged a functioning Linktree for convenience, and I updated my website with a new landing page and ToS. Plans to start paying for my own domain are still up in the air.

As I’ve said on social media, the shop itself is closed because I’ve moved back to Germany, and I need to sort some things out. In the meantime, I’ve been working diligently on preparing for a more permanent reopening!

Just the other day, I decided to redesign the logo.

I wanted to connect the H’s and make them flippable. As you can see, I also decided to — not exactly rename Handmade Hearts, but I made the logo with the German “Herz,” which means “heart” (pronounced like if the “ear” in “hearts” sounded like “air”). It felt appropriate. I’m going to see about registering my business with the German government once I have my long term residence permit that allows me to work. Once I have all the legal stuff sorted, I will be opening up again on the newly launched Artisans Cooperative markeplace.

I already have my own page on the marketplace, and I’ve even bought in as a member-owner. The price to share in co-operative ownership is anything between $1,000 on the spot and $10 combined with essentially working for the Coop in my own time over the next year. Can you guess what option I chose? (Hint: I’m not exactly employed at the moment.)

Before I joined the Artisans Coop, I was and still am involved with the Indie Sellers Guild. I run their official Tumblr and help to verify new members. Current projects we’ve got going on there include:

Pressuring Etsy to let up on its harmful business practices

Working with U.S. legislators to pass a bill to crack down on resell scams

Developing a program to accredit online marketplaces using university-funded research

I should note, my joining the Artisans Cooperative won’t mean that I’m leaving Ko-Fi. My page there is very useful for one-off donations, and I might someday use it for monthly donations à la Patreon. I might cross-post listings for reach, too. Details… are still a bit loose.

Hold on, monthly donations? For what?

I’m glad you asked! For full access to my patterns — and probably discounts to other things. I’ve been doing a lot of work to write and test my original crochet patterns. So far, I’ve had one pattern fully tested and uploaded, with plans for much, much more.

Germany, co-ops, guilds, patterns… It’s a lot going on. Here’s a paragraph to breathe. I hope you’ll stick with me to the end of the post. Please remember, while I have the support of my partner and community, I am just one body and brain. (And I’m working with not entirely abled versons of each.) If it seems as though things should be happening faster or more efficiently, do keep that in mind.

I haven’t even discussed my inventory yet.

Since the beginning, I’ve been contemplating and recontemplating what I wanted to sell. I knew from the start that I wanted to design it all myself; that’s what makes experimenting and pattern-writing so important. Now, I’m close to a solid decision, and I love to make animal plushies and embroidery art.

While working on the aforementioned legal stuff, I’ve been building an inventory of original animal plushies (some of them cat toys), bags, fidget balls, bracelets, hats, and scarves. All of it is crocheted, though I’d like to expand into knitted and sewn items in the future. I am working on multiple amigurumi cat designs, and a songbird design. There will also be further work and testing on the snake pattern –– and it’s not just the shapes; no, I’ve developed designs for tapestry crochet that are yet to be redrafted into something testable.

I don’t have much of anything embroidered in my inventory yet. I’ve been commissioned once for some art, and I’m content for now to keep it at commissions.

Embroidery wasn’t even on my radar when I first decided to make Handmade Herz, but I have fallen in love with it. I’m currently putting some practice into portrait embroidery, which may end up becoming a staple of HH if all goes well.

A lot of loose threads we’re weaving… and I don’t even know how to weave.

You may be wondering about the title of this blog post, “An Engaged Update.” I thought it was a little bit punny, or it might be if I’ve managed to make this engaging.

I am engaged!

I have been, technically, for some time, but now it’s on a legal level. I’ll be getting married in late November. The original plan was to get married in summer, so I went ahead a few months ago and made my partner a “wedding” dress just in time for the July pride parade in our city.

This dress was the most ambitious project I have ever taken on, if only because it is a wearable of that many stitches. I was so afraid of getting it wrong! But it turned out beautiful and comfortable, and a proof of concept for my ability to make wearables this big. Someday, I hope to include original clothing designs in my inventory.

Thanks for reading to the end. I will try to write more frequent blog posts, hopefully with more narrow themes. I’ve still yet to be a vendor at a craft market, partly because of everything going on and partly because I’m very nervous. I will be writing something up about my experience when it finally happens.

Stay strong.

#craftblr #Blog posts #captioned #Crocheting #Embroidery #Indie sellers guild #Artisans Cooperative #Handmade shop #shop indie

[hpowellsmith]

I absolutely ADORE Royal Affairs! I have been here since the CdlC days, and I can say 100% that you have always been consistent in knocking it out of the box with your games.

I remember being a part of the initial Patreon beta testing, and from some of the slight changes and improvements, you have truly crafted the master game of Choice of Games. Your world building is phenomenal as always, and even with including new lands and cultures. I loved the small aspects of Westerlind that we can tie to the real world, but it’s crafted into your own creation so delightfully that I can imagine being there myself. I hope you are taking the rest you need after this project and just to take care of your health as well!

I had only one question: do you have any face claims for the RA love interests (+ Javi) yet? I chose a Javi route and I remember throughout the game it’s said that they have curly hair, and once we reach the engagement ceremony, I think it’s said that they have a long braid down there back. It’s cool for my guys to have long hair, but I think I may have missed where this was stated. As far as I remember, only Beaumont was stated to have longer hair. Have I missed something? Because it’s very plausible as I played from 10pm to 1am 😂

I'm so delighted, thank you so much! It's wild to me what a journey it's been since Crème de la Crème and I know Royal Affairs has gone through such a lot of polish since the first versions. I'm really grateful for all the feedback that helped that happen.

I ended up being ill during the leadup to release which wasn't very pleasant but I had a lovely couple of days' holiday during release week, thank you!

Javi does indeed have long curly hair, maybe similar to this kind of length. They wear it in various styles for different occasions.

Thank you for the kind comments and the ask!

#asks #royal affairs

[alltimefail-sims]

"A cozy hideaway nestled by nature and gifted with waterfront access."

@awingedllama added 10 years to my life with their new Nostalgia Living set, so I built a house for you all. It combines my favorite things: 90s nostalgia and Halloween decor (Yes I am ready for summer to end). It was built in Copperdale on the 20x20 lot "Little Falls Nook."

I chose 711 for the house numbers because the Nostalgia Living Set came out on July 11th; the street name is "Winged Llama Lane" for obvious reasons, but I felt clever about it nonetheless lmao. I hope you all enjoy!

INFORMATION & DOWNLOAD BELOW ↓

Packs I used:

Normally I include the CC in my build downloads, but I'm just going to link it below and encourage you to follow @awingedllama because they deserve nothing but love and support. Their cc is some of the best build/buy cc out there and is not paywalled in any way. Thank you @awingedllama, I hope you like this house!! <3

CC I used (all by awingedllama): -> Nostalgia Living Stuff Pack -> Nostalgia Living Shoe Bench Made Functional (Snowy Escape) -> Boho Living Set -> Save File CC (windows, house details) -> Grandma's Nursery Set -> Infant Conversions -> Apartment Therapy V2 -> Pair O' Normal Plants -> TS3 to TS4 Functional Costume Chest

PLEASE NOTE: make sure you place this house down using "bb.moveobjects on"

TOU: All I ask is that...

You do not reupload and claim the build as your own (yes, even if you tweak it a little).

You tag me if you use it! I would love to see this in other people’s games and saves, that’s why I’m sharing it! <3

Additional screenshots are on my Patreon post. This build was playtested. Thank you for your hard work, Michael!

Let me know if there are any in-game issues!

DL: Patreon (always free)

@pancakesrealty

#ts4 #simblr #the sims 4 #ts4 build #ts4 buy #ts4 residential #ts4 build mode #ts4 lots #ts4 download #ts4 dl #build mode #sims 4 #ts4 copperdale #awingedllama #atfs #mybuilds

[chenria]

I posted 262 times in 2022

That's 12 more posts than 2021!

183 posts created (70%)

79 posts reblogged (30%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@chenria

@mimikoflamemaker

@sofia-d-asb

@tippystreasurebox

@miasmat

I tagged 205 of my posts in 2022

Only 22% of my posts had no tags

#original character - 24 posts

#litg carl - 22 posts

#litg s2 - 21 posts

#litg season 2 - 20 posts

#litg mc - 18 posts

#thunderbirds are go - 17 posts

#litg carl x mc - 13 posts

#litg fanfic - 13 posts

#shameless self promotion - 11 posts

#digital art - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 81 characters

#i am really looking forward to play more with my new character of princess elodie

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Okay... I threw m plans for a Mermay picture out of the window. I've been binging "My Time at Portia" for days now. This is just such a relaxing and unagitated game that brings me so much joy with building and fulfilling the commissions for the townspeople.

My builder Cassidy nearly instantly fell in love with the head of Civil Corps (the "police" of the town) and Arlo is just so cute.

So I had to feed my current hyperfixiation with a quick fanart of Cassidy with her husband Arlo (yes, she managed to marry him on the last day of the first year :3)

107 notes - Posted May 29, 2022

#4

Patreon reward for the lovely sissy_the_siren - she requested a picture of her adorable Hawke and I hope I did her justice.

110 notes - Posted February 9, 2022

#3

Okay... so... this was supposed to be my "personal art" piece for March. But migraine... I at least managed to finish it and I am mostly satisfied with the outcome. Since it's not a commission I am not going to fret too much over the parts that didn't turn out quite like I wanted them.

But at least I got myself a Lynn/Bruno fanart while I am still enjoying Season 4 of "Love Island the Game".

This game is truly a guilty pleasure and I am probably 20 years older than the target audience XD but it's silly and fun and I need that in my life right now XD Lynn is the main character in this season and I am playing her in the game.

And I know about the controversies around season 4. But I decided that I can't shut out everything in my life that I enjoy because capitalism is a thing... I have fun - you just don't have to take this season too seriously XD

Lynn and Bruno would never work outside the Villa... but that's a problem for another day XD

[My Patrons get the high res version as well as sketches and progress pictures leading up to this piece.]

Patreon || Twitter

112 notes - Posted April 2, 2022

#2

Of course... right before I need to get back to work I find my inspiration and the motivation to draw again ;) At least that's a good sign that I am really over Covid (now I only need to get rid of that annoying cough...) But at least I could seize the remaining time and managed to finish something small for myself. A picture of Virgil Tracy - yes, it's that time again that I need Thunderbirds escapism and a self-indulging picture of Virg... 

Btw... Virigl has horrible hair and I hate to draw it...

The background is a photo of the sky ... I was too lazy to come up with an actual background...

115 notes - Posted May 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

It’s the 16th... so we can post this, right? I’ve been waiting since May to finally be allowed to share this XD  My contribution to this years TAG Mini Bang ( @tagminibang2022 / @tagminibang ) I got assigned to illustrate one of @womble1′s great fanfics and there was so much to chose from and many brilliant fics! ♥ But that one scene totally brought an instant image to my mind, so I had to illustrate it after I read the little story called “Rest”.

In the sunken seating area, Scott was stretched out across a sofa, head propped up on a cushion, a book in one hand, legs crossed at the ankles.

“That's right little bro,” he [note: Gordon] crouched lower, draping an arm over Alan's shoulder and lowered his voice in his best nature programme voice over impression. “Here we see a very rare sight, for a while it has been thought to be extinct by several scientific communities, it’s a resting Scott Tracy”

Story: “Rest” by @womble1 

121 notes - Posted July 16, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[kim-poce]

4. Witches Are Meant to Burn: Sculpted

On Patreon | First | Previous

=-=

The trip was the usual, train for the first part, carriage for the second, and walking for the last, the terrain was often steep. It normally would be just plain tiring. It was just plain tiring until we got close to the library, then it was tiring and so hot. I’ll need to decrease the number of coats in my wardrobe while I’m here. Everyone was really excited the whole time, I was more exhausted than anything. I didn’t have time to rest, though, soon I was seated at the big circular table in this overly bright room made yesterday just so this meeting could be held.

Oh right! I should introduce myself, it’s late I know but I’m not used to stepping out of my field, and in my field, everyone (to who I talk) already knows me. I’m Professor Ernestine Ruos-Aliene de Patry, an etymologist as you must have guessed. Well, I study several fields but whenever I have to keep it short I boil it down to etymology.

I work mostly at Jitarin Academy, however, I don't work for Jutarin Academy, it’s more like, they help me get resources for projects and I earn them renown, this relationship had been working for several years now, and after I got into the group of people that chose who will work on what the academy began to accept any request of mine.

The meeting was going on as lively as usual,  I tried to ignore slight nausea I was feeling for about half an hour already. Maybe I shouldn’t have joined Tina on her unhealthy meals earlier today. I hope Hector has medicine on him because the closest apothecary is over 500 kilometers on foot plus thirty minutes on horse from here and none of my students would like to go there now.

On the bright side, The Podium Library was just two kilometers away. Getting to the library will be a pain, though. One thing that I learned from studying history is how much the ancient people on this continent loved caves. They aren’t good economically speaking, it’s not every one that has enough tourist value to attract that many people, they do not help merchants and business between different places, but caves are natural and (sometimes) habitable, many villages were built around some agglomeration of small caves, and only when these were all occupated that they would go to build buildings. There are many theories of why. I myself wrote a couple of books on how the demonization of the new and the changes caused the fear of the effect of the hands of god had on the hands of fate were related to so many caves being used as the starting point of most cities, but what is relevant now is that, as expected of someplace from the Fog Age, the Podium Library was underground.

“Is the ground really stable?” Professor Viane Ji-Dober asked, someone had to, the library had been evacuated just an hour ago due to the risk of a cave-in, not that something had happened, not knowing if something will happen was the issue. “We are talking about dozens of academics here, so we must be sure if it’s safe or not so we can get the Acceptance Of Risk papers ready.”

“Although the entrance broke down, the ground and structure seem fine,” Markus Virtus —Portia’s representative— said while tapping his fingers on his left hand.

“We need more than seems fine,” Professor Gione Petar said, “Will you take responsibility if the centuries-old archives are damaged? Do you have any idea how important this place is?”

“I know how much-”

“Oh no, you do not.”

“Professor Gione, that’s enough. We don’t need to talk about how important is to be sure the library is safe, we obviously needed to be sure before letting everyone in, —” I glared at him, the very one who put his students in the library before knowing it was safe “—What we need to talk is why it has been two days and a proper team wasn’t called yet.”

“You get here late and want to complain about the decision we made in your absence? You don’t have the right to complain!” Professor Jayon Bullar snapped.

“I have if you are being an idiot!”

“Idiot? You are suggesting we send a group of brute people who know nothing about what they are putting their hand on down there because of what? Because you are scared of a possible cave-in? It survived centuries! Why would it break now?”

“I swear for the hands of god that if you truly think that’s how-”

“Can we… uh… calm down?” Markus tried, “If one of you goes with the team it’ll be fine, right? Any… volunteer?”

I glanced around at the mostly old and out-of-shape people that formed that group, none of which are fit to go with the team down the library. No one volunteered, of course, and sending a student was out of question (unless you are Gione Petar, but he doesn’t count). Well, we’ll be here for a long time, aren’t we?

“Why are you so grumpy?” Lucas asked after I told them how the meeting went. “You’ll get to see the library before them! That’s luck!”

“Yeah, join our risk measuring team down to a maybe-instable-maybe-not ancient cave is the best definition of lucky!” I said, rolling my eyes. “Did I tell you they decided on the shorter stick?”

“yes you t-”

“Who makes this kind of decision on the shorter stick?!”

“Someone who spent years studying the saying “witches are meant to burn” is asking why they let this important decision up to luck?” Tina asked, raising her eyes brown.

“Fair.”

“When are you going?” June asked.

“Tomorrow morning, after eating some proper food, and resting a bit,” I answered, Hector had the medicine, all I needed now was to join June for meals instead of Tina.

“Time for them to get the Acceptance Of Risk form ready and for the team to arrive,” Sandra commented.

“Yeah, if they had it ready they would try sending me down there today.”

“Why is everyone here an egg?” Tina asked.

“Why do you call people eggs?” Sandra asked. Wrong question.

“Don’t ask.” Me, June, and Luca said at the same time. “Tina no.”

Tina obviously ignored us. “So, do you know about the primordial soup…”

I sighed. This, too, would take a while.

Soon (or kind of) it was morning, the night was hot, and no one told me this place would be so hot. But apart from this, it was a good night of sleep. We had slept in a tent about one kilometer away from the entrance of the library. The terrain was mostly rocks, steep rocks, but luckily we had found enough plain areas to camp on, the groups did have to be somewhat far away from each other, though. If the cave is safe we’ll certainly move into the library. I know I’ll.

I was nervous, but it wasn’t my first rodeo. We had all the equipment to made it as safe as possible, and I had a whole team who actually knew what they were doing with me. So I took a deep breath and started. 

The cave was pretty I’ll give it that. The entrance was small and hard to go by, the first part didn’t seem to be changed much, if at all, from its natural formation. The team was really patient in helping me down on the harder and narrower parts, none of them let it out that it was annoying to have someone slowing them down.

As soon as we got deeper inside the walls changed. The dark reddish walls were more and more gray, and smother. It was to the point the ground became totally plain and the wall formed are perfect semicircle over our hands. I hadn’t arrived at the library yet, but I knew it was from the last part of the Fog Age, near the end. You can tell by the changes on the walls, you see, ancient people wouldn’t change it like this. They wouldn’t mold the place in fear of the disasters it would bring.

“It probably had an actual entrance,” I commented. “Leading out, the path we came from isn’t the same they used to take back then.”

“I hope you are not planning on breaking the walls or something,” the team leader, Maliane, said, showing how much she trust us.

“I can’t say you don’t want to, but we won’t actually do something this stupid.”

Maliane nodded, but it was clear that she didn’t believe me.

“You meet Gione, right? Short, thin, angry.” I asked.

“... yes.”

Yeah. She has a reason not to trust us.

“This is the entrance,” the young woman leading us said, gesturing to a cube hole in the walls, each side had two meters. If one didn’t look closely one would think it’s just a cube carved into the cave wall.

The entrance was hidden, we had to walk into this dark cube to access this, also dark, narrow pathway. Twenty meters in, and going right was the actual library’s entrance. We lit the place up, but our flashlights weren’t enough to show everything so the team started attaching lights on the floor.

Two bronze doors were fallen down, five meters tall and about half of it wide. Looking closely it was ten centimeters thick. It was hard to tell just yet if this was for aesthetic purposes or if they wanted this library to be out of reach this much. As the place became brighter the craving on the doors was more visible, the details were shaped like processed jewels, just like Gione’s students had told. I would take a closer look later, but at that moment there was something more important than the drawing on a door.

I glanced at the now partially lighted-up library. It was… amazing. There were so many books, I know it’s a library, but it’s from Fog Age. We know barely a thing about that time and it’s like life handed down this much data as a gift. The bookshelves also drew my attention, they aren’t built, they were sculpted. Everything I could see was connected, it was as if that place was never a natural cave, maybe this whole large library was sculpted.

“We’ll start,” the team leader said, I didn’t really care much about how they were going to check the library. I knew part of the team was outside and I knew everyone was caring tools, but my only whole in there was to let them know if they are damaging some ancient thing they shouldn’t touch, so I could take my time to look around without a problem.

I thought I could take my time to look around without a problem. I realized I was wrong the second I stepped into the library.

=-=

@kathea @extemporary-username @wolfeyedwitch

#Witches Are Meant to Burn #my writing #witches #original writing #fantasy #fic

[dam-peace]

Life Update, Game Updates.

Hey guys,

As I mentioned in my  post yesterday, things have been pretty hard recently. I actually fractured my foot a couple weeks ago on my way to work, and am currently unable to walk. My job refused to give me sick pay, because my 'average weekly earnings were not high enough', which is funny considering I was a full-time worker.

All in all it was just their roundabout way of saying that I wasn't entitled to sick pay, because I haven't worked there long enough. Long story short, I just put in my 2 weeks for the job because I just didn't have the will to fight a losing battle. So, now I'm currently looking for a new job remote from home, so money's been tight, made that much worse by the increase in the cost of living. 

I was also supposed to get a mortgage to move into a better house and area, but looks like that may not be in the works right now. Something that I was extremely excited for, even postponed going back to University for. The career I chose to go into years ago is no longer what I want to peruse.

Worse, its becoming one of the main things that deteriorates my mental health further, not to mention my poor mother is extremely overworked, underpaid and suffering from her own physical ailments. ​And, I'm not exactly helping things either as the eldest, with me being bedbound and now out of a job. Though she doesn't hold it over my head, which only makes the guilt that much worse.

Mentally, physically, emotionally and financially I just feel drained. I'm trying to hold onto things that give me enjoyment, like making my games. As well as maintaining a positive attitude, because the last thing I want is for my depression to take hold of my life like it used to.  Whilst I look for a new job, I actually plan to take a break from doing asks on Tumblr and what not to start my patreon again.

This time better than ever, as I now know what I'll be doing and what to offer, after looking at what other creators are doing for ideas. I'll still try to answer any questions you guys may have and reply to any comments, it's just sometimes I get overstimulated and completely shut down at times. So if I'm taking a bit of time to do something, please just be patient with me, I really am trying. 

So for now I won't be updating the public demos for awhile, as I want to work on the alpha build for patreon, as well as other patreon content. When I do so, I then want to start looking for beta testers to take a bit off of my plate, because looking back through all the coding and story content is something that frustrates me beyond belief, and again is very overstimulating for me.

In addition to a 'Coding Advisor' of sorts with the beta testers or amongst the best testers, someone who can help me properly code in things that I can't seem to find the solution for myself. Because as I've mentioned before, I'm still new to coding and there are many things I'm still unable to do, e.g. coding in a 'dark mode' for readers. Unfortunately, I wouldn't be able to pay any of these people, but they would be credited in my work. 

So, yeah that's been my life, if you managed to actually read through everything above, good on you. I probably would've looked at all that lengthy text and clicked off, lol. But, despite all the depressing stuff above, I just want to take the time to thank each and every one of you for you love and support.

From the views, downloads and playthroughs to the kind comments, constructive criticism, game ratings, follows, likes, questions/asks, artwork, reposts and payments. As well as, adding my games to your collections, or by simply just showing a genuine interest. I thank you for every contribution you've every made in any way, because no matter how small it may seem to you. It really does mean a lot, and continues to push me forward, through some really hard times ♡

#ABO-if #VV-if