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#patrick tambay
legendsofracing · 4 years ago
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Patrick Tambay, Ferrari 126C3, ahead of Andrea de Cesaris in the Alfa Romeo 183T at Zandvoort in 1983.
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f1-blog-posts · 3 years ago
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Patrick Tambay (Lola-Ford THL2), 1986 Belgian GP, Spa-Francorchamps
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1337wtfomgbbq · 5 days ago
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Hold onto your butts, and find out how Niki and James wound up with twelve kids...
Bruno: Dad. Where do we all come from?
Niki and James: *Confused looks *
James: What do you mean Bruno?
Bruno: Well, Niki already explained to us where babys come from. But he said you nead a man and a woman for that. And you are both men, so... *gears in brain scraping *
Niki and James exchange a knowing look.
James: Well, you see Bruno, we all got you guys from somewhere. You for example were found by uncle Jackie.
Everybody perking up.
Bruno excited: Really?!
James nods: Uh hu. But you know, uncle Jackie and uncle Francois weren't sure if they were quite ready to have a child so they decided to give you to old Niki and I. After all, we already had Nigel and Elio.
Nelson mumbling to Gilles: That doesn't sound fake at all.
Gilles: *hisses for Nelson to be quiet *
Gilles: Wait, and where did uncle Jackie find Bruno?
James cryptically: He never told us.
Gilles: And me? Where did you get me?
James easy going: Oh you, we found you in the dumpster.
Didier starts laughing and Gilles looks horrified.
James chuckles: Yeah, and Didier liked you so much that he talked us into keeping you. He called you his 'trash brother'.
Didier laughs: I don't even remember that, but I'm okay with that.
Gilles glaring: And where'd you get that hyena from *nods at Didier *
James: Oh, some auction. Niki wanted a plane but, you see, Didier was much cheeper.
Gilles starts laughing and now Didier looks horrified. He looks over at Niki for some support but Niki just shruggs.
Niki: He was quite cheep.
By now, everybody is laughing or snickering and really interested in the story.
Andrea: And me?! Where'd you get me.
James: Well, you see--
Niki butting in: We were at the zoo one day.
James: *stares *
Niki: And at the erm... sea lion exhibit with Jacques and Elio, and there was this lone kid there as well. Just sitting in a stroller, with a paper clip pinned to it that read, 'take if you want'.
Andrea stares in shock, and James has to fight to suppres his laughter.
Jacques: And I? What about me?!
Niki: You know those storage auctions.
James catching on: Yeah, when you rent a garage or something to store your stuff in. If you stop paying the rent, at some point they're just gonna auction the garage and all the stuff in it.
Jacques nods slowly.
Niki: Well, we went to one of those auctions for a weekend and *shrugs * you were in the unit that we got.
Jacques: *stares with big eyes *
Alain thoughtfull: I don't know... That doesn't really sound right.
James catching on quickly: Don't tell me you don't remember how we got you Alain.
Alain shakes his head and quietly stares at James.
James pretending to be shocked: You don't remember how you just dropped out of the trees when we were hiking in the woods?
Niki nods: I don't know for how long you've been living there all by yourself. But we really managed to integrate you nicely.
René: Wait, Alain was a wild child? Like Mogli?
Niki nods.
René, almost afraid to ask: And me?
Niki: Well, we went to the bakery one day.
James: And you were there too, all by your lonesome, staring at the cakes with eyes all big and teary. We couldn't not pick you up.
Gilles, totally enraptured at this point: And Nelson? *pointing at Nelson *
Niki snorts: Nelson? He was just there all of a sudden.
Gilles and Nelson simultaniously: Huh?
Niki: I was grocery shopping one day, with Alain and Elio, and when I got back into the car he sat in the passenger seat. Just said, 'you're my new family now' and crossed his arms all pouty.
Gilles snickers: You were pouting.
Nelson: No I was not! *pouts *
Patrick excited: Me. Me. What about me?
Niki: There was this carnival one day.
James: That all the kids really wanted to go to.
Nelson rolling his eyes: And let me guess, you won Patrick at one of the stands. Can knockdown maybe.
James frowns: No, Nigel won.
Niki: And it wasn't can knockdown but duck fishing.
Elio excited: And Nigel and I? What about us.
James: Oh you two are adopted *waves him off *
Everybody laughs, except for Elio and Nigel. Elio looking quite hurt.
James hurries: We adopted you from a witch.
Elio excited: Really?
Niki: Well Nigel. You we adopted from a fairy.
Elio: *heart eyes *
Riccardo meekly: And what about me?
James: Well... *rubbing his chin *
Niki: Erm... *scratching his forehead *
Years later:
Gilles: Hey, do you guys remember those storys you told us, about how you got us all. Just so you didn't have to tell us that we're all adopted?
Niki over the newspaper: I don't know what you mean trash baby...
Gilles: *stares, contemplating his life *
Elio: You know, you never told us where you got Ayrton from though.
Niki and James exchange a look.
Niki and James: Well, there was this shooting star one night...
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legendsofracing · 3 years ago
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Patrick Tambay, Renault RE60, 1985.
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1337wtfomgbbq · 2 days ago
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Ayrton: Oh look, three parts of the 'tiny french peeps'.
Michael: Who are the 'tiny french peeps'.
Gerhard: They're track royalty. If Us Weekly would write about us, they would always be on the cover.
Ayrton points: That one there, that's René Arnoux. He is one of the dumbest guys you will ever meet. Patrick was team mates with him last year.
Patrick: He asked me how to spell "orange".
Michael: And that little one?
Ayrton: That's Gilles Villeneuve. He's totally rich because his dad invented Toaster Strudel or something.
Gerhard: Gilles Villeneuve knows everybody's business. He knows everything about everyone. That's why his hair is so big. It's full of secrets.
Ayrton: And evil takes a human form in Alain Prost. Don't be fooled, because he may seem like your typical selfish, back-stabbing, slut-faced ho-bag. But in reality, he is so much more than that. He's the queen bee. The star. Those other two are just his little workers.
Ayrton: Alain Prost. How do I even begin to explain Alain Prost?
Jean: Alain Prost is flawless.
Jacques: He has versace sunglasses and plays golf.
Nigel: I hear he drove a car into a hotel lobby once and Marlboro just payed for it.
Andrea: I hear he does commercials. In Japan.
Elio: His favorite movie is Varsity blues.
Niki: One time we met James on a plane. And he told him he was pretty.
Nelson: One time, he punched me in the face. It was awesome.
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frenchcurious · 9 months ago
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Patrick Tambay (Alpine A442 #4423) 24 Heures du Mans 1976. - source Caross e Pilotos.
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f1pictures · 2 years ago
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Patrick Tambay  Ferrari 1983
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candy-tyrrell · 4 years ago
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The Shape of Things to Come
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1337wtfomgbbq · a month ago
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James: Watching the world cup final with the kids.
James. Nigel's eating all the snack... by himself... he won't let anybody else touch them.
James mumbles: I'm hungry *looks at Niki mournfully who has fallen asleep *
James: Gilles screams every time the commentators use a term also common in f1.
James: While Elio's doing his very best to become our own personal commentator.
James: Nelson and Alain aren't even watching the game but discussing the current racing season.
James mumbles: Maybe I should actually send those three into the bed room.
James remembers that Riccardo is in the bedroom, sick with the flu.
James: Maybe that's not that great of an idea after all...
James: Andrea still thinks we're watching ice hockey and keeps asking when Michael Jordan's gonna show up. 🤦‍♀️
James: Ayrton won't stop ranking the players looks.
James: *huffs * Jacques and Patrick have been singing the german national anthem for ten minutes straight *pulls a face * and that totally off key.
James: René is comparing everything to the wrestling match that he watched yesterday. He's even bitching about the jerseys not being as cool as the wrestling ones.
James: Now René's bitching about why they won't just settle the score with an awesome wrestling match *rubs bridge of his nose *
James. Honestly Didier seems to be the only one somewhat keeping up with the game.
James: Bruno is trying to beat Brazil on his game boy *mumbles * he got world cup usa for christmas... even though he could be literally watching the game RIGHT NOW!
Later:
*cheering in the background *
James looking scared: Brazil just won the world cup and I think Ayrton and Nelson are transforming into something.
Nelson and Ayrton: *actually hugging and celebrating together *
James: *looks even more scared *
James shakes Niki awake, who somehow hasn't been woken up by Ayrton and Nelson loosing their shit.
Niki groggily: What? What's going on, is the match over?
James: *points at Ayrton and Nelson, still hugging and jumping around with each other *
Niki:
*sobbing *
James and Niki both turn and see Elio clinging to Nigel, utterly inconsolable and sobbing hysterically.
Niki:
Niki: Did I wake in another dimension??!
Riccardo suddenly comes walking into the room looking like a zombie. He takes one look at the crying Elio, one look at the hugging Ayrton and Nelson before he just turns around again and leaves the room.
Bruno, btw, doesn't care at all that Italy lost the world cup because on his game boy he (read: Italy) beat Brazil.
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1337wtfomgbbq · 26 days ago
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Jean: Who you gonna call?
Patrick: *points at Alain and Niki *
Patrick: Those bastards!!
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f1-blog-posts · 2 months ago
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Patrick Tambay, Renault RE60B, 1985 Austrian GP, Österreichring
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k-ky · 16 days ago
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My emotional support French drivers
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1337wtfomgbbq · 29 days ago
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Niki: Taking the kids on a train ride because James broke the sardin can VW.
Niki: At least he managed to get us all seats in one compartment.
Niki: Emerson and Ronnie are sitting with us *mumbles * my condolences.
Niki: Alain is hanging off of Emerson's arm the whole time and-
Alain to Emerson: Uncle Emerson can you tell me a story about Colin Chapman.
Niki: Elio has snuggled up to Nigel and is sleeping. What is Nigel doing you may ask? He's eating. But this time we have enough food for everyone.
Niki looks at James, who looks to be deeply relieved by that fact.
A bit later:
Niki: Nelson and Andrea managed to persuated James into running through the train to go see the conductor.
Niki pans camera to show Patrick and Ronnie, both in deep conversation.
Niki: Patrick actually started a serious discussion with Ronnie.
A bit later again:
Niki: Gilles has been poking me in the side for minutes *turns to Gilles * What is it?
Gilles grimaces: I have to pee.
Bruno: *looking out of the window and amazed by the landscape *
Niki: Don't drool on the window!
Niki to Gilles: We'll gonna go find the toilet in a moment, alright.
Niki: René's hopping around on the vacated seats of James, Nelson, Andrea and Jacques. *rolls eyes *
Niki: Didier is reading a book and being quiet... I mean, I don't wanna say that Didier's the only good kid, but... he kinda is.
Didier sticks his tongue out to Gilles, who sticks his tongue out right back.
Niki: And this time we didn't forget Riccardo.
Niki thinks about it for a second and suddenly turns pale.
Niki: Wait a second... where is Jacques.
That would start the desperate search of the compartment for Jacques. All the while Gilles won't shut up about the fact that he still needs to pee, and Didier threatning to lock him in the toilet after they finally managed to locate it.
James gets yelled at by Niki once he gets back with Nelson and Andrea but this time he won't take it. Nelson and Andrea wanted to see the conductor, there was never any mention of Jacques.
In the end they manage to locate Jacques, he had fallen asleep on the overhead rack. Emerson noticed him once he started snoring.
And according to Jacques, he went there because he needs to be higher up on train rides or else he feels sick.
Emerson and Ronnie really question how Niki and James manage to handle the boys and how none of them have ended up dead yet.
By the by, they didn't forget Riccardo... if you can count Riccardo being in an entirely different compartment the entire train ride, talking to Jochen and only rejoining the group once they reached their destination, as not forgetting.
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frenchcurious · 3 months ago
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Patrick Tambay (Ferrari 126 C2) 2éme du Grand Prix d'Italie - Monza 1982. - source Carros e Pilotos..
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k-ky · 14 days ago
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Patrick Tambay going absolutely bonkers on the podium, along with Alain Prost and René Arnoux, San Marino GP 1983
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1337wtfomgbbq · a month ago
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Niki: Welcome back to part seven of 'reasons the kids have been upset recently'.
Niki: Nigel was upset with Nelson, because Nigel wanted to play classroom teacher and Nelson wanted to play dog. It almost sounded exactly like this: „No! Class what is two plus two?“ „Bark bark bark!'“ „Mom, he's still doing it!“
Niki: Patrick was upset that I would not let him eat a rock.
Niki: While trying to introduce my children to 'reading rainbow' they became upset that I wouldn't skip past the commercials to get to 'reading rainbow'. *screams of terror in the distance * They're upset about something right now, obviously. *chuckles * The material writes itself. Anyways, they thought 'reading rainbow' was a commercial. *laughs * They don't like 'reading rainbow'.
Niki: Didier became upset while playing 'candy land' when he drew the ice cream card and right at the next turn drew the peanut card. And that really stinks sweety, I know. I understand. But it's just a lesson of life. *shruggs *
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k-ky · a month ago
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Nelson Piquet, Nigel Mansell and Patrick Tambay (with a flower in his hair courtesy of Piquet), Brazilian GP, 1984
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f1-blog-posts · 3 years ago
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Patrick Tambay, Lola-Ford THL2, 1986 Belgian GP, Spa-Francorchamps
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