#perfect for late night drives or chillin' in your bedroom | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dredshirtroberts · 5 years

Text

Best buckle up buttercupz cause this bout to get splodie

Everything will be under a cut because there is high probability this gets TMI really fuckin’ quick and y’all don’t need that in your lives unless you really give that much of a shit about my bedroom activities.

As those who have been with me previously know, this is all stream of consciousness and also apparently my brain has forgotten most spelling rules so if shit starts not looking like words, it’s not you i promise.

I honestly don’t know where to start with this one. I’ve got...a lot of things to go over.

So. If you’ve been following my adventures as of late, I decided to follow a whim and go with a guy I barely know up to Pittsburgh to help him get all his shit out of his old apartment and bring it back down this way close to where I live.

Things to note about this guy: I met him...uh...2??? weeks ago??? on Bumble which is Tinder but less shitty (but still kinda shitty).

Uh...maybe backing up even more???

*headdesk* oh damn this is a lot hang on.

So. End of April I finally ended things for good with my long term boyfriend. Teal deer, things did not go smoothly there and shit ended badly when I was finally able to move out at the beginning of May. There were like...2ish weeks where we were broke up and I was still living with him.

I’ve had some pretty whacked out emotional responses to this upheaval. I legitimately thought he was the man I would spend the rest of my life with. I wanted that. But he was abusive and not willing to take responsibility for his part in the end of our relationship. So that sucked, but I apparently hadn’t loved him in ages so that part was less painful. I have been far more broken up about losing my two boys in the end of the relationship. I legitimately feel like I’ve lost my children and that fucking sucks and no one fucking understands cause 1) they’re cats and 2) no one i know has done this and had to leave their babies, they usually got to keep their babies. and that’s fucking...

ANYWAY.

About a month? ish ago? I decide fuck it I think I can handle brief and casual attachments so I can have regular sex for the first time in YEARS. cause of course we move in together and the well dries up completely so like, that was not fun. Have a high sex drive and apparently he did not. Anyway, having fun meeting dudes, casual sex and figuring out how to navigate single life and hookup culture.

There are a couple guys who are prospective long term candidates but like...idek if that’s what I want out of any of this??? because I’m still healing? and trying to keep my feet up underneath me in more than a few ways. I’m also trying to keep my trauma on the DL cause it’s really fucking easy for people to take advantage of me and my issues - it’s kind of how I keep getting into shit relationship situations.

So, like. Tinder and Bumble are fun because I forget that it’s meant to be for meeting people? I just like being super shallow and “sorting” my choices into “yeah I could see having a connection with that one” and “absolutely the fuck not”. I’m 27 and kind of a terrible person on the inside. I overcompensate by being a fucking kindness deathray so i think there’s balance maybe.

Dude comes across my bumble and the fun thing with bumble is if you’re showing as W4M on there, you get to initiate contact. Which is terrifying at first until you realize you literally only have to say hi. So yeah, dude is hella cute, profile doesn’t suck, I swipe like (right, I think?). It’s a match! I open with a simple hi. basic chitchat, whatever.

we go out for a date to a location close by that I actually trust because oh hey he’s moving down this way and has good taste in bars. Food and drinks are had. Take him back to mine cause like, he’s fuckin GORGEOUS. and funny. and smart.

And he’s like “yeah I’ll spend the night, but I won’t fuck you til we’re sobered up.” Which, i mean, be still my beating heart, yeah? (I WARNED you this was going to be TMI y’all. if this is already too much I totes get it, it’s likely not going to be any better further on). So we go to sleep, and maybe I have a hard time sleepign but I’ve *had* a hard time sleeping. We wake up, do the sexing, and then he buys me coffee. Like, not only did he pay for the entire date the night before, tell me he will not have sex with me while there’s a chance i might be drunk, is just fucking...amazing in bed, but he BUYS ME COFFEE.

So like, alright, this is one I’ll keep around for a while cause I’m doing casual shit, yeah? nothing serious, nothing with attachments. no strings. just free food and sex.

Oh and did I mention he’s a cuddler???? but like? a cuddler that cuddles the way I like cuddling???? do you *know* how hard it is to find that??? I’m apparently very specific in my cuddle preferences.

So whatever, we exchange numbers (which I do not do with people from these apps until I’m comfortable with them). He’s also got multiple girls he’s seeing right now and that’s totally chill and like, it’s clear nothing’s going to go quickly here, just fun.

Talking - he’s very clever and does the sentence making doing well. He and one of the other girls he’s seeing goes up to P-burgh to begin the great migration, he calls me while he’s out there, and he’s got some shit going on in his life and I’m like, that’s some drama you’ve got there. It’s shitty for you, hope it gets better, yeah? They come back down, and he drops by to hang out and grab some of the shit he left at mines. He’s waiting to get into his new place nearby, and he needs a place to stash his stuff and I have a relatively safely located appartment so I’m like. I think I got a corner for some shit. Then he’s like “hey, wanna go to [area he’s moving to where his parents also live]” and I’m like, sure. I’m down for a quick road trip.

we’re out that way and he’s like “Hey there’s this park this way and there’s a lodge or whatever I think you’ll like” and I”m like, “k I like parks!” and as we travel out and he’s telling me about it I’m realizing this is not like...slide and swingset park, this is national park style stuff. And I’m like ‘Oh shiiiit I know where we’re going he’s right I do like it!’ we get out there and it’s rainy but we hike a little for s&gs, and then he’s like let’s go inside and all the sudden we’re getting a room for the night???? and this is not your momma’s motor-hotel on the side of the road, this is a kinda swanky lodge and i’m like???? okay???? wish i’d known or i’da packed better for an overnight???

so like...yeah I have a great time, it’s beautiful out there. Like...idk if any of you are familiar with the Blue Ridge Mountains, but the fuckin’...the Parkway y’all. Is one of my favorite places to be and this is right the fuck there and it’s great. The weather’s nice, the food is delicious, clearly I enjoy the company, I have a blast.

We stay the night, get up in the morning and head back to mine and we chill for a minute and I change clothes cause eww i’m wearing clothes I’ve hiked in. I get comfy and ready for a nice day chillin at home. And he’s like “So. Wanna come up to Pittsburgh with me?” I’m now I’m familiar with his planning methods which are none. So i figure it’s a quick overnight, maybe 2 nights and I’m like “Fuck it, sure.” I pack a little better but I’m wearing my contacts and I’m like “I can totally sleep in these a couple nights and be fine” and I just kinda...am in his car on a 7+hr drive to Pennsylvania.

And he’s really easy to get along with. Of course for some reason my period just shows up 3 weeks early out of fucking nowhere which put a little damper on shit but I didn’t have to worry because we weren’t only spending a couple nights up there. We spent nearly a week up there for...reeaassoonnnns?????

I wait til day 3 and I’m like “So...uh, idk if you know this but I had no idea we’d be up here this long or i’d have brought another outfit? and some toiletries?” And he is like... “Um...I didn’t mean to like, abduct you or anything. do you need me to take you back???” To which I respond that all I want is an idea of how long he’s planning on being up there so i can best make adjustments where necessary and that the only date I *have* to be back for is my sister’s bday which is Friday.

This is all fine and we work it out, but I realize that he doesn’t do “planning” apparently. So I get really good at being proactive with trying to figure out what his expectations are.

He’s your typical 28yo white cishet dude. You know what I’m talking about, so some of the stuff I expressed concerns with, I am trying to temper with the fact that he’s literally just as dumb about the world as my dad is and my dad’s a decent person - an idiot about how the world actually works but a decent person.

And like? It’s really annoying being near him because he does everything the way I specifically like it? And I never said a damn thing??? because I don’t talk about my particular eccentricities wrt my preferences in how i like being touched/shown affection/cuddled? So he wouldn’t know???

Really fucking annoying cause I’m trying very hard to make it so my heart doesn’t take over when I’m really trying hard to be chill and casual and clearly he is just wanting to be casual and shit but then he says things? and it’s like...so off-handed and flip but gives my heart the flutters because?? maybe there’s more than just a small potential?

I get real tetchy on my period and put up with a lot less, i was also less than properly medicated so that did not help, but like...I never got to the point I used to get to with my exes where I just...couldn’t handle being around them or their normal ass selves. This guy does things that are annoying sure, and I had less patience for it than normal and then like 2 seconds later he’s literally out of one of my romantic fantasies about how i would like the perfect guy to treat me? and be around me?

*sigh*

Anyway, I had a great time in Pittsburgh cause I’d never been and he found my weakness because I’m a ho for some museums and art and shit and he took me to the carnegie mellon museums and let me just wander around like a doof with my jaw on the floor the whole time. Also we did some other stuff and he took me to Fallingwater which was like an hour or so away from P-burgh but was soooo cooooool.

Oh and I didn’t even mention the real kicker in all of this. He *gets* what i’m going through because he’s been in my shoes previously and it’s fucking mindblowing so he knows what to say and how to do the nice? and like???

IT’S NOT FUCKING FAIR I’M NOT READY FOR THIS SHIT HEART. YOU GOTTA LEAVE ME BE AND LET ME JUST APPRECIATE THAT HE’S PRETTY OKAY???

I hate the universe. Thanks tho, U-girl. I know you got my back.

so. That’s what’s been going on. Got back home safely, he’s got his own place like 30mins to an hour away, easier access to the other girls he’s seeing right now, and I have time to properly process and catalog my thoughts before I see him again.

Cause I’m gonna. He’s *damn* good in bed.

#life post #no really there's a lot of TMI in here #read at your own risk #ya girl's a disaster panda still but at least i'm chill about it rn

1 note · View note

99soft · 6 years

Text

otp questions: MY answers for markren / 3 wc: ~ 2k

a/n: you might think i’m stupid for doing this but it helps me get back at writer’s block (revenge)! there are two more going to be posted and the last one is going to be terribly long. (so i guess this is sort of for me).

1: Who spends almost all their money on the other?

hands down mark spends a lot of his money on renjun. and it’s not like renjun asks for it because dude he’s got his own fucking money. mark just likes to spoil his bf - sometimes he’s just out and he sees something that he thinks renjun will like and get it. that’s just how he is, he’s whipped.

2: Who sleeps in the other’s lap?

who do you think? mark sleeps in renjun’s lap !!! he’s a baby and renjun is his cuddly bear. which sounds really cheesy but renjun is really good at rubbing his back and such. he also likes the way renjun plays with his hair, it calms him.

3: Who walks around the house half-naked and who yells at them to put on some clothes?

renjun walks around half naked all the time. EVEN WHEN THERE ARE GUESTS AROUND !! it’s crazy, you would think it’s mark however he’s way too shy about that stuff. so usually it’s mark yelling at him because it drives him insane. (his skin is just so nice and mark doesn’t want to get worked up around guests...)

4: Which one tells the other not to stay up all night and which one stays up all night anyway?

mark likes to read things late at night and in the bed next to renjun. and renjun cannot sleep with the lights on or with mark’s phone brightness lighting up the whole room so usually he yells at him and mark will say “in a few minutes babe” but a few minutes turn into an hour.

5: Which one tries to make food for the other but burns it all by accident and which one tells them that it’s okay and makes them both cookies?

okay ya’ll know. it’s mark who burns all the food. after he tried to make breakfast in bed for renjun, he almost burned down the whole house. renjun eventually did come to the rescue and save them all from dying. he just rubbed mark’s back, gave him a peck on the cheek and made them a good batch of cookies.

6: Which one reads OTP prompts and says “Oh that’s us!” and which one goes “Eh, not really”?

renjun used to really be into …. some vampire show. either it was buffy the vampire slayer or true blood. either way it doesn’t matter so he loved to write fanfiction for them … and well otp prompts were always so nice to use.sometimes he still reads them and thinks about him and mark while reading them. so eventually renjun showed one to mark: “person A is addicted to peanut butter. unfortunately, when they start dating person B, they find out person B is allergic to peanuts.” and mark was so confused because neither of them are allergic to peanut butter… it happens a lot and mark just gets so frustrated.

7: Which one constantly wears the other’s clothes?

renjun always wears mark’s clothing !!! he especially loves wearing his sweatshirts. no explaination he just loves mark and his nice clothing….

okay fine! yeah its cliche, they smell like him and renjun loves it.

8: Which one spends all day running errands and which one says “You remembered [thing], right?”

mark is usually the one running the errands and renjun just texts him after he’s done, asking if he’s got what they needed. prompting mark to turn the car around to get that thing that they desperately need. it drives mark crazy because it almost happens every time YET he refuses to have a shopping list !! he’s a maniac.

9: Which one drives the car and which one gives them directions?

mark’s the driver. renjun is the organized one. he’s the one that likes sitting in the seat just chillin and playing music not having to worry about the road in front of him. one might say he’s a bit lazy.

10: Which one does the posing while the other one draws?

mark poses for renjun ! sometimes naked sometimes not who knows ! mark thinks it’s quite embarrassing but renjun reassures him that if he doesn’t get this art grade because of him, he will no longer give mark any more kisses for a whole month !! so there is that.

11: If they were about to rob a museum, which one does backflips through lasers and which one is strolling behind with a bag of chips?

renjun is incredibly flexible and sometimes it freaks mark out. so i can totally see renjun doing all those cool flips and stuff because mark … mark’s just a klutz. plus mark does like chips so… it just works that way.

12: Which one of your OTP overdoes it on the alcohol and which one makes the other stop drinking?

this is kind of hard because sometimes renjun likes to drink a lot. but, usually its mark who gets drunk. mark doesnt even over do it he literally will have like one glass of wine or something and lose his shit. renjun usually has to pry the drinks away from mark and lock them somewhere he will never find them. that’s how crazy mark is. (also renjun doesnt take him to any parties anymore)

13: Which one likes to surprise the other with a lot of small random gifts?

i kind of said this in the beginning but mark likes to surprise renjun all the time. most of the time it’s stuffed animals so as you can imagine … renjun has a huge pile of stuffed animals. he loves them all and doesn’t have the heart to get rid of them.

14: Which one keeps accidentally using the other’s last name instead of their own?

… renjun… sometimes he’ll introduce himself to a friend of mark’s like “hey lee renjun”. and mark is like ???? and the other person is like ???? so everyone is confused until renjun’s ears get red and he corrects himself. sometimes it just ends up with mark and renjun making out in a nearby closet or restroom because mark can’t resist how renjun just accidentally uses his last name as his own like that.

15: Which one screams about the spider and which one brings the spider outside?

mark HATES spiders but somehow renjun screams through bringing it outside on their balcony. it’s a funny sight because they both are quite afraid of the little creatures. BUT WHO ISN’T?

16: Which one gives the other their jacket?

mark likes giving it to renjun and renjun likes receiving it. like i said before renjun likes wearing his clothing!!!

17: Who keeps getting threatened by the other’s overprotective older sibling?

renjun’s older sister always threatens mark, even when she’s over at their place pretending everything is fine - renjun will go to the bathroom, leaving them alone and she … is one terrifying person. mark is literally afraid of her so he’ll just nod along and do whatever she says.

18: Who’s the first one to admit they have feelings for the other?

it was mark. since they’ve known each other it wasn’t that hard for other people to see it coming. mark is head over heels for renjun and maybe renjun is a little oblivious - even when jaemin and jeno would tell him, he would be like “lol no but thanks”. so after a party at jeno and jaemin’s … mark has a little too much to drink and he sees renjun out on the balcony, staring at the city below. mark somehow makes his way to renjun. renjun is like “haha okay buddy, lets not be out here since you’re drunk and like it’s dangerous.” but mark stops him because the twinkling tealights that are surrounding them - they make renjun glow. he’s so pretty mark can’t resist. “i like you.” and you can figure it out from there. (nothing suggestive, it’s all fluff with these two).

19: How good would your OTP be at parenting?

it would be cliche to think of renjun as the motherly figure and mark as a grumpy old dad. but that’s not them at all. please they’re still young, parenting is the last thing on their minds (plus i cant think of them like this yet). they live in the moment, making out in random places and cuddling during scary movies. sometimes drinking on school nights but who knows, they probably will be good parents someday.

20: Which one types with perfect grammar and which one types using numbers as letters?

what does numbers as letters mean !!!!? they both are equally capable of writing with perfect grammar. mark loves to write, dude was going to be an english major. renjun is just smart. idk

21: Who gets attacked by a bully and who protects them?

if anyone is going to be attacked by a “bully” its going to be mark just because that boy is embarrassing and a klutz, so sometimes he says the wrong things at the wrong time. which is okay because mark is completely innocent and he’s really sweet so he doesn’t know what’s going on. renjun is the one who puffs out his chest and usually scares away the bullies. he doesn’t fight anyone he just scares the LIVING SHIT OUT OF THEM.

22: Who makes the bad puns and who makes a pained smile every time the other makes a pun?

mark has got to stop with the bad puns, renjun can’t keep fake smiling all the time. it’s exhausting.

23: Who comes home from work to see that the other one bought a puppy?

only with renjun’s consent because a puppy is a big responsibility !!! but yeah it’s mark who would. fucking sugar daddy esk pile of goofball.

24: Which one gives the other a piggyback ride when they’re tired?

mark loves giving renjun piggyback rides. he’s small enough because mark doesn’t usually work out very often because work and college tires him out but he’s strong enough for renjun. and he usually picks him up when renjun comes home from a late shift and he just carries him to the bedroom to pepper him with kisses.

25: Which one competes in some sort of activity and which one does the overzealous cheering?

mark plays … basketball and you bet renjun is the most supportive s.o. there. fucking yelling and cheering for his babe. mark gets a little embarrassed but when he sees renjun’s pretty face, he feels fueled enough to keep playing. uhm and he always wins…

26: Who takes a selfie when the other one falls asleep on their shoulder?

renjun loves taking embarrassing pictures of mark because he thinks mark is quite ugly at times. (but his ugly boy, nobody can insult him except for him). so sometimes mark falls asleep on him and renjun can’t just pass up on this opportunity. there is a scrapbook going now with about a third full.

27: Which one would give the other a makeover if they asked?

renjun used to get it from his older sister all of the time and at some point he enjoyed it. so he begs mark if he can do it to him. sometimes he does his nails or plucks his eyebrows. his favorite part is the facemasks or … using the bath bombs together.

28: Which one owns a pet that the other is absolutely terrified of?

renjun has a small dog at his parents’ house and mark is absolutely terrified of it because that thing can go from being cute to rabid and snarling in one second. for some reason it hates mark and mark hates being there. help him.

29: Which one holds the umbrella over both of them when it rains?

mark just because he’s a tad bit taller and renjun doesn’t want to extend his arm for that giant. (mark isn’t really that tall… renjun is just bitter and lazy).

30: If your OTP went on vacation, where would they go and what would they do? Who would take the pictures?

one of those disney places. they would be so cute there please, that’s where dreams come true and happiness never dies. i want them to make a little video together liKE A VLog oh my god, im crying inside. they would be so cute going on rides together. just imagine it. ~

#q&a;mlrj #my works #mlrj:writ

0 notes