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#personally this is one of my many only weaknesses
daydreamtoropova · 2 days
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I have a headcanon(theory?) that Alastor might have Prion Disease
I suspect he has problems with an early stage of Prion Disease.
Where does it come from? Prion disease can come from cannibalism and/or consumption of anything that's infected (for example, Prion Disease is what causes Mad Cow Disease). A comment has mentioned that Alastor WASN'T a cannibal when he was human (and only became one when he was a demon).
But my theory still holds up as Alastor's victims could end up giving him Prion Disease because of the contact and possible accidental consumption.
AND, he might have gotten it AS a demon too as that is when he started doing cannibalism.
Common Symptoms of Prion Disease:
Rapidly progressing dementia
Difficulty walking or moving
Muscle stiffness
Muscle twitching or spasms
Personality changes
Memory problems
Hallucinations
Confusion
Difficulty speaking or swallowing
Tremors
Weakness
Alastor seems to be experiencing some of these symptoms I believe.
First, Muscle Stiffness
This scene perfectly captures this I think:
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And there are many other moments in the show where this type of lankyness and stiffness is shown.
Also the phrase "like a deer in headlights" is about how you freeze in place. So considering Alastor's death with the hunter, I would think it could be related. He froze up in place when he got shot, and maybe he couldn't move.
Second, Personality Changes
In many times in the series, Alastor acts "insane." Sometimes he'll be posh one moment, and the other he'll be completely deranged. His personality is about the same, but I feel he slowly went insane after a while and that was the personality change.
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Third, Difficulty Speaking
He SMILES all the time as you know. And sure, while it may be because of manipulative motives, it also can be the muscle stiffness in his face. And THIS
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SO MANY STICHES! (I know this might have nothing to do with this and it's deal-related but it's still an interesting edition.) A reblog has mentioned it could be the reason he has a deal. Because an overlord with Prion Disease would be very unpowerful and with a disease like this he would yearn to find a cure or to be more powerful.
Fourth, Side Note
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THIS. It shows a lot of the symptoms, AND IT TALKS ABOUT BAD MEAT. BAD MEAT (INFECTED TISSUES AND ANIMALS) IS PART OF WHAT CAUSES PRION DISEASE.
I believe Alastor might have an early case of Prion Disease.
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If it’s alright, I have a question about Vil and Epel’s relationship. I understand that the accent changing plot line is just a cultural politeness thing that didn’t carry over outside of Japan, but the other parts of changing Epel’s behavior don’t quite make sense.
Why exactly is Epel being forced to call macarons his favorite food? And act very soft-spoken? I can’t see how these fit in with the politeness aspect of the table manners, no abrasive language, etc. It just doesn’t give a very good impression, especially in combination with the unfortunate implication of giving Epel a Southern accent for the “change your accent” plot point.
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Before I get to responding to the questions posed by this ask, allow me to explain for those who may not be familiar with this controversy! This is so we can all go into reading this post from the same starting point.
I've made titles to denote the explanation of background knowledge and to denote responding to the questions actually asked to me! If you're already familiar with the Vil-Epel-accent debacle then feel free to skip the first section!
Disclaimer: I’m speaking on these concepts as I personally understand them. However, I am not a native Japanese speaker so I’d advise that you consult additional resources with a better understanding of the language and culture. Two resources I enjoy are Yuurei and MysteryShopTLs, who have both also addressed Epel’s accent and how it was localized.
The Accent, EN vs JP
It’s well-known that Epel is a character with a heavy accent who has been explicitly told by Vil, his dorm leader, to alter the way he speaks. In EN, Epel speaks with what appears to be a southern (as in, “from the southern United States”) accent. Therefore, when Vil tells him to stop speaking in the accent, it feels as though Vil is shaming him for his southern roots and culture. This has also led to fans (especially of the EN-only sphere) thinking that Vil believes Epel’s accent is “unrefined” and “makes him sound uncouth/uneducated”, which is why Vil tells Epel to cover it up. I have even received asks conveying as much in the past (here is one example).
In the original JP, Epel speaks in a way that does not closely resemble any real-world Japanese dialect but rather a blend of them. If you ask a native Japanese speaker, they would likely tell you that it is difficult to understand what Epel is saying and that it sounds as though he is speaking rudely or too casually. People could genuinely take offense to the accent because it can be mistaken as something else entirely. This is obviously very different than the real-world accent (which many people can still understand and wouldn’t perceive as rude) that Epel was localized to have. The decision to give him a southern accent, then, does not completely carry over its original JP connotations into EN.
What remains the same in both EN and JP is the reason Vil provides for telling Epel to adjust the way he communicates. As he says in EN, “Speak properly" to which Epel immediately assumes the command comes from a place of elitism/classism and Vil thinking Epel's manner of speaking is beneath him. Vil responds with, "Stop misinterpreting my instructions. I have nothing against your home or its dialect. What I object to is your attitude. Being proud of your home is all well and good, but there is a time and a place for that. The way you address your superiors is entirely unacceptable." (Keep in mind that before this, Epel was the one instigating a fight with Vil and subsequently got his ass whooped for disrespecting an upperclassman. As the victor, he declares that Epel must do as he says--that's the "culture" of NRC. The weak obey the strong, so if Epel wants to do whatever he wants, then Vil challenges him to beat Epel in a fight. Until then, the loser must obey the winner. Epel agrees to these conditions.) This may be a little hard for western English speakers to wrap their heads around, but MANY Asian countries, Japan included, run on a hierarchical system which is embedded even into their languages. Japanese, for example, has honorifics to denote the relationship between the speaker and the listener, as well as variations on the same word depending on the context ("boku", "ore", "watashi", "atashi", etc. are all valid ways to refer to oneself, "onii-san", "onii-sama", "aniki", "kyodai", etc. are all ways to refer to a brother, whether blood-related or not). In some cases, it's considered rude to call others by their first name unless you know them well, and even then it's not common to see a first name without an honorific. This is not as strictly adhered to in English, which is perhaps where a cultural disconnect occurs. What Vil is referring to in his instructions to Epel is what is known in the world of linguistics as "code switching", or changing how one communicates to suit the situation. Part of code switching is changing one's "register", or the level of formality you use. So for example, I could use a colloquial/casual register when I speak with my friends, but I may shift to a more polite and formal register when I speak with my professors, a boss, or an older relative. Vil, then, is critiquing Epel for not speaking politely to his seniors (something which is expected in Japanese culture, but not expected among those in similar grade levels in western cultures).
In the Harveston Sledathon event, we get to venture to Epel's hometown and hear how the locals speak. Indeed, we get more instances of people who speak in the same way Epel does. It's the Harveston dialect, which is so distinctive that it basically sounds like a whole different language. (There are also languages like this in real life; consider Mandarin and Cantonese; technically they are both "Chinese" but Mandarin and Cantonese speakers would not be able to comprehend one another even if they use the same written language). However, it's notable that Marja (Epel's grandmother) and the mayor of Harveston are able to code switch flawlessly into a more standardized tongue. They explain that this is a skill they have developed because it helps in communicating with tourists/visitors to the village and for whenever they travel to the nearby city to sell their wares. This reinforces Vil's point that there is a "time and place" for certain ways of speaking, which Epel needs to consider.
Macarons and Soft-Spokeness
Accent thing aside, some English-speaking fans take issue with Vil's stern treatment of Epel, particularly in instances in which Vil seems to be exerting significant control over his underclassman's behaviors. (Japanese-speaking fans largely do not hold the same sentiment.) Examples of this include Vil forcing Epel to state that his favorite food is macarons, as well as making Epel present as soft-spoken even when he's just among his peers. I will now be addressing both of these points. TO BE CLEAR, I am NOT trying to defend Vil but rather I'm just going to speculate about why the circumstances are the way that they are and/or why perceptions of his attitude may differ.
Starting with macarons! It is stated in Epel's official profile and by Epel himself in his Birthday Boy vignettes that his favorite food is yakiniku (Japanese grilled meat). However, macarons are also listed as his favorite food, and this is notable because he's the only character with two foods listed instead of just one. In the aforementioned Birthday Boy vignettes, Epel is quick to qualify his love of meats with, "Well, I do have one thing I like even more. It's, ah, macarons." When asked what he likes about them, he says, "They're... cute. And sweet! And they come in lots of different flavors." His voice here sounds hesitant, so it's not clear whether he's being entirely honest or not. He even admits in a whisper that, "[Macarons] are not very filling, but still." Epel again complains about macarons being good but not very filling when he has some in the City of Flowers/Fleur City. To this, Azul asks, "Why do you look so unimpressed, Epel? I thought macarons were your favorite food. [...] But was my intel mistaken? Would you prefer something with a stronger flavor profile?" Epel insists he is fine, and Azul responds with, "Excellent, then my intel bears out." This creates some confusion over whether Epel actually likes macarons or not. I doubt that the information Azul has on others is inaccurate. Plus, Epel states of his own free will to the player (who is interviewing him) that he also likes macarons. This leads me to believe that while Epel doesn't outright hate macarons, he does like them alright (but still prefers grilled meat more). The only thing he seems to have an issue with is how unsubstantial macarons are as a food item.
Now... why does Vil make him state that macarons are his favorite food instead of grilled meat? It's sort of touched on in Epel's Ceremonial Robes vignettes. In them, Vil chides Epel for his poor table manners and asks him to state his favorite food. Epel responds with grilled meat/barbeque, which earns him a smack from his dorm leader. (Vil actually smacks Epel multiple times in these vignettes as punishment, which ended up being another source of ire in the English-speaking part of the fandom; such a thing is more common in Asia and its media, so it's not seen as too outrageous in Japan.) "Do my ears deceive me?" Vil says. "I could've sworn I heard a word unfit to be spoken in this noble dorm. I will ask you again. As a student of Pomefiore–a dorm founded upon the tenacity of the Fairest Queen–what is your favorite food?" From this dialogue, it can be surmised that Vil's reasoning for drilling the macarons in as Epel's favorite food is because it is something that is more befitting of the regal "image" of the Fairest Queen and the dorm made in her honor. Vil seems to regard grilled meat as an inelegant food which does not suit the Fairest Queen nor Pomefiore.
The second thing the asker brought up is Epel's soft-spokeness. I guess I'm a little confused by this??? Soft-spokeness is a part of being polite; it ties back to volume control (ie "indoor voice" being softer than "outdoor voice"). I also don't recall a specific instance of Vil chastising Epel for NOT being soft-spoken at all times. He allows Epel to be loud sometimes and raises his voice himself. I feel like volume is not something that Vil harps on as much as other things like cursing or speaking politely to the correct authority figures (unless, of course, volume is important to the level of politeness required for the current conversation). I could be wrong on this though, so please let me know if you know of any specific instances of Vil being mad about Epel speaking loudly that I may have missed! What I do find odd is how... consistently (?) Epel tries to keep polite even when Vil is not around to monitor him. When Vil and Epel first met, Vil makes it clear that there is a "time and place" for Epel's accent, and it's not when addressing seniors. So... by the logic, shouldn't Vil be okay with Epel acting more relaxed or rowdy around first years or more casual settings in general? Why does Epel need to maintain the facade of being polite even when not in the presence of his superiors? Why does Epel seem to even act fearful about word of his misbehavior/rudeness getting back to his dorm leader and even make others swear they won't divulge the incidents to Vil?
One theory I'll propose is the entirety of book 5. Vil was insistent then on having Epel in the NRC Tribe. He wanted to weaponize Epel's cuteness, which he believed could compete with his long-time rival, Neige. This probably fed into Vil's demands for Epel to appear and act dainty and innocent, traits which Neige effortlessly possesses. Vil literally even refers to Epel as his "Poison Apple" that will help him defeat Neige. After book 5, Vil seems to have eased up on his rigidity. However, I will caution that this explanation may or may not align well with vignettes and/or event stories, which do not always work in a cohesive timeline with the main story.
Perhaps a more all-encompassing explanation is... this is probably because Vil is just very strict about how his dorm members present themselves at all times, since they are expansions of Pomefiore and of himself as the leader. Both the macarons and Epel's attitude are reflections of the dorm he (a celebrity who is very aware of the public eyes on him + his reputation) is affiliated with, and Vil won't have them poorly represented. He is the dorm leader, so he has the "right" to rule and impose his ideals as he sees fit. It's a similar situation to Riddle forcing the Heartslabyul students to follow silly, nonsensical rules (because they're tradition) or risk a scolding or a beheading. And again, Epel is following along because (as established in book 5), he has agreed to submit to Vil’s orders until he beats Vil in combat.
At the end of the day, I don't think Epel being forced to call macarons his favorite food is a huge deal. Is anything that big lost in claiming you like something that isn't your actual favorite food? It's not like Vil is forcing Epel to claim he likes eating something that would actually harm him (like, if Epel had an almond allergy or something).
What's more dubious is how VIl governs Epel's attitude and temperament at seemingly all times (to the point of eliciting some apprehension from Epel). Given the most generous reading, maybe it's Vil's way of teaching Epel maturity and how to keep his voice down since Epel had zero of it and acted loudly brazen when he first enrolled. It doesn't help Epel if he's quiet and well-mannered in very limited social situations; it has to be "generalized" or expand to other scenarios for Vil's lessons to truly be instilled in him. (Like... what would happen if Vil DIDN'T hold Epel in check? His classmates would not be able to understand Epel's speech, and he might get into trouble by picking fights with others.) This is a life skill that Epel lacks, unlike his grandma and the Harveston mayor, and Vil's teaching it to him via "tough love" (though whether you approve of his methods or not is up to interpretation). Recall that Vil also teaches Epel to embrace femininity as its own strength and to disregard outdated gender norms--this could be considered another "lesson". I doubt that anything Vil imposes is done maliciously, but rather comes from a place of wanting others to be better and to shine their brightest, even if that path is difficult or painful. Epel, as the rebel in this circumstance, of course does not enjoy being told what to do and misbehaves in small ways. There’s a limit on how much he can misbehave though, as it would hurt his pride to be reminded of his failure to one-up Vil. He's like a kid that doesn't want to be caught cussing or acting out by his parent. It can be seen as immaturity and an unwillingness to change or to grow up, but it can also be seen as someone who wants to freely be able to express themselves or to be their "truest" self. Epel is rowdy and headstrong, and it's difficult for him to repress these parts of himself. Given the least generous reading, Vil is oppressing and stifling Epel in many ways that extend beyond what his dorm leader position should reasonably allow him to do. In fact, a popular fan translation for book 5 is "The Beautiful Oppressor", as Vil is frequently shown limiting the liberties of his NRC Tribe members during their training arc, not just Epel's.
Which is the truth here? Why do those in the English side of the fandom decry Vil's actions and side with Epel whereas the Japanese side see little issue with this?
I wager that this predominantly comes down to, again, cultural differences. Many English-speaking fans are based in the west (particularly the USA and Canada, where the EN servers first launched), places which emphasize individuality and self-expression. Of course they would be more likely to take Epel's side, as he's the one trying to be himself and stand out in his own way. Meanwhile collectivism--an ideology which stresses conformity with a group--dominates in the east. They are more likely to see no problems with Vil's actions because, to them, he is acting in the ways he is to "guide" Epel and show him how to best "fit in" with Pomefiore and at NRC. I believe the whole "being soft-spoken" thing also ties back to cultural differences; speaking loudly is something else that can be considered rude in Japan, so it's entirely possible that Vil encouraging Epel to be soft-spoken is another element of politeness that did not translate well to English (as the western world tends to be much louder and more animated in their conversations).
What it boils down to is that the way Vil and Epel's relationship was written did not work well for a western audience, whose values and perspective is VERY different from the original audience TWST had. It appeals far more to a Japanese fanbase than a western one, and has resulted in many misunderstandings or anger about Vil's character because of this.
I'm not sure if I managed to adequately explain everything, but I hope that this at least helps you to see from a different perspective!!
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zuhamuses · 3 days
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♡ " The side effect "
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Suitor: William Rex x Kate (MC)
Fandom: Ikemen Villains
CW: none!! Just fluff and chaos lol ♡
Prompt: Dressed in love
Note: My entry for @judejazza 's event!! I hope everyone likes this. Divider and header made by the lovely @natimiles <3
No one was expecting that the medicine Roger gave her would have this effect on her. He had first wanted to give it to Liam, but he wasn't present. Roger's second option was Ellis... who was also not in the castle.
It was something he had created himself. Roger had full faith that the medicine had the ability to heal a person quicker. A flu, migraine, anything else? You were gonna feel fine in no time (okay, somewhat of an exaggeration). That's when he heard that Kate was feeling unwell and... yes.
"Oh? Who is this beautiful young man...?" Kate's eyes were fixed on William as soon as he entered the infirmary.
He smiled at his lover and gave Roger a look.
"Ah, right. She will be fine in a day. Seems like I made a mistake with the medicine."
William nodded his head, the smile still on his face, and he went closer to Kate.
"Hello, Kate. How are you feeling?"
She giggled. "Great! Now that I have seen such a handsome guy. What's your name?"
He laughed, realizing that she was having troubling remembering him. Ah, it was somewhat sad. They were meant to go on a date but...
"William Rex at your service. So, Kate..."
Her big eyes were staring at him the entire time, and a goofy smile was on her face.
"Your eyes are telling me that you like me. Will you give me your time and spend the day with me?"
She gasped and quickly stood up, moving towards the stairs. "YES! What are you waiting for, pretty guy? Let's go! This feels like a dream - it must be - but I won't let my chance slip."
William laughed again and went after her. Roger cleared his throat. Well, that was interesting...
In the parlour:
Kate stared at everyone present in the room. Her face showed it clearly that she didn't remember any of them. Harrison and Liam were sitting and having a talk when they stopped to look at Kate.
"Woah, Katie! What happened?" Liam asked.
"Katie?" She asked, "You know me?"
"Will! What's wrong with her?" Liam looked crestfallen.
The red-eyed man laughed and shook his head. "She will be fine in a day, Liam. Don't worry."
Harrison chuckled. "You look like you are in a trance."
Kate nodded her head, suddenly very serious. "There are too many pretty boys here," she looked at William, "but I think you are the only one for me."
Harrison's eyes went wide, and Liam choked on his own spit.
"HUH?!" Liam let out.
"Damn... she's still in love with you despite her 'temporary case of amnesia'". Harry's voice was full of amusement.
William was biting back a laugh as he followed behind Kate, who was running towards the kitchen. She looked like a little child on a sugar rush.
In the kitchen:
"Oh! Pretty guy with long hair!" Her first instinct was to touch Victor's hair. The Queen's Aide was beaming at her.
"Aww! You flatter me, Miss Kate!"
William raised an eyebrow at his old friend, smile not faltering. "She's still mine, Victor."
"Aww, shucks. Kate you are just so cute!!! Would you like this fresh scone I made?"
"Ooooh! Yes, please."
And Kate was given a plate full of scones by Victor...
In the dining hall:
"Oh, hello, Kate!" Ellis warmly smiled at her. "Is there something wrong?"
"Ohhhh, pretty boy number four. I am fine. It's a weird medicine, and I think I have a memory loss, and I feel weird. But I am fine." She looked at Jude, "You look like a gang boss."
"Tch. Yeah, gon' make your ass go bankrupt."
"Haha, okay." Kate laughed.
Jude's brows were furrowed. He didn't even want to ask any questions.
"Come on, Will! Let's go outside!" She smiled at him. A smile that always had him weak.
"After you, my lady."
In the garden:
"You look really beautiful." Kate told Elbert.
"Oh... thank you. Al, am I beautiful?"
"Yes, of course... what kind of ideas are you having?"
"... nothing."
Kate took William's hand. "Hey... I am feeling dizzy."
He carried his lover to her room.
---
"Hmm... I still don't remember much." She told him. "My heart starts beating super fast when I look at you, though."
"Hmm? Really?"
"Yes. You have such pretty eyes... your hair looks so smooth, and you smell divine. Hmm, Will?"
"Yes, my love?"
"Can I borrow your cape...? It's cold."
He laughed. "Of course."
It looked better on her than it did on him. William wondered how she would look if she wore his clothes. Hmm, adorable. But first, he had to make sure his lover would feel normal again.
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burnednotburied · 3 days
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Chapter Three
AO3 Link | Chapter 2 Link
Pairing: Abby Anderson x fem!reader
Fic Synopsis: Abby goes looking for Owen and ends up on the wrong end of your knife.
Tags/CWs: angst; slowburn; enemies to friends to lovers; talks of purity culture/ideals and “sin”; internalized homophobia and some comp-het feelings (they’re both so gay but so dumb about it); animosity between WLF and Seraphites; blood/gore; descriptions of being hanged; religious/cult-like ideas
Note: This is not at all how I thought this chapter would start. Alas, I am riddled with religious trauma, and Taylor Swift just released the song “Guilty as Sin?” I mean… “My boredom’s bone-deep This cage was once just fine Am I allowed to cry? I dream of cracking locks, Throwing my life to the WOLVES” Are you kidding me? It’s perfect. So this started out differently than I planned. But what was I to do? I am just a girl.
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There were many topics on which you had been educated in-depth but were never supposed to experience first-hand.
Sex was one of those topics.
You knew the mechanics of it. The anatomy that was involved. Its purposes and benefits. The dangers of it.
You had been told, vehemently, that it was something that should never be done outside of the safe and proper confines of marriage.
Which meant you could never do it because you could never marry.
The Prophet had to remain pure.
Set apart.
Free from romantic, familial, worldly ties.
You were taught to suppress any desire to do otherwise. A task that you had been mostly successful at upholding.
But there were times when your eyes lingered where they shouldn’t and your own thoughts made you shiver and blush.
It was the sin of lust.
The other major vices were usually easily circumvented. You could be disciplined and selfless, just and kind, modest and brave.
You always did what you were told, and you didn’t ask questions.
You told yourself that you weren’t weak; you just knew your place. You knew what was expected of you, and no other options had ever been made available.
So, like thrown clay, you had allowed yourself to be molded into the person you were today, each piece of you carefully and intentionally shaped by the hands of others.
The Elders created the perfect Seraphite specimen. Quietly devout. Enigmatic. Indelible. Untouchable. Obedient.
A mouthpiece disguised as a leader.
A Prophet.
They made you.
You were not a naturally occurring thing.
Sometimes you didn’t even feel human.
Lust was one sin you knew could be concealed, buried far below your surface, unseen by critical eyes.
It was a small act of rebellion. A hidden glimmer of defiance. Although, you weren’t doing it on purpose.
And it was made especially loathsome due to the regrettable fact that it only ever happened to you when you were looking at or thinking of a woman…
Now the Wolf stood in front of you, hammer held tightly in her right hand.
Demons were quickly descending upon you, and you had just witnessed (and neglected to intervene into) the death of three of your own people. The only person you helped was the Wolf, your enemy, who you were meant to kill.
You could guess what the Elders would say if they were here now. How disappointed they would look as they pointed out your many failings.
For once, you didn’t care.
Strangely, despite everything, you felt like a bird whose cage door was just thrown wide open.
Or a well-trained dog that had been mistakenly let off leash.
You could breathe. Unrestricted.
Your eyes remained glued to the Wolf.
Her back was to you, her soaked clothes clinging to her skin. Her shoulders rose with each of her deep, deliberate breaths.
Time seemed to slow as your eyes traced down the length of her arms, taking in her strong form…
See, you knew the sin of lust was bad, if only because it made you stupid.
Or distracted, at the very least.
Demons were coming, and you had just been moments away from gutting this girl.
You definitely couldn’t trust her.
But you didn’t have to trust her to look at her.
A series of snapping twigs and high-pitched shrieks from the surrounding forest instantly brought your attention back to the approaching threat.
Demons were another one of those things that they taught you about but never thought you’d actually encounter.
When you arrived on the mainland that morning, you had been led to the network of Seraphite-built bridges, above the city, concealed in the clouds.
Nearly your entire day had been spent in the sky.
If there were any Demons below, you didn’t see them.
Honestly, you hoped you’d never have to come across the cursed creatures.
The sounds they made were animalistic, but somehow still eerily human. Like a voice that was either enraged or overwhelmed with pain.
You had been told that they were unsavable. Completely consumed by the disease and irrevocably punished for their sins. No longer even human.
As a child, you heard stories of the first Prophet valiantly fighting off hordes in defense of her early followers.
In training, they taught you how to fight both Demons and human adversaries alike. Although the former was always theoretical.
You were shown sketches, detailing the different stages of it.
Foolishly, you thought you were ready.
But nothing could’ve prepared you for what came running out from the cover of the trees.
It moved faster than you would’ve thought possible, too quickly for you to take it all in, but the glimpses you captured were grotesque.
It went straight for the Wolf, swinging its arms wildly. She effortlessly dodged its attack before striking with the hammer. Hard. It was dead in just three blows.
Two more approached from behind you, closest to Lev, and it was past time for you to be useful.
Lev was a skilled archer, but he was still a kid. And Yara, also a kid, only had use of one of her arms.
Both of the Demons were focused on Lev. He fired an arrow, hitting one of them in the chest, but it didn’t take it down.
Its back was to you.
You couldn’t let yourself freeze again.
You closed the distance between you and the beast, lifting your dagger with both hands and bringing it back down swiftly, piercing deeply through its skull.
It let out one last pained shriek as it fell.
The Wolf had taken out the other Demon before Lev had to loose another arrow.
But there were two more where those came from. One swung at the Wolf, and the other came for you.
You were able to dodge, narrowly missing the impact of its savage attack. Stepping back, you continued to evade its blows.
You swung at it, but the thing was fast. Your blade cut into its shoulder instead of its head. Ripping your weapon out, you tried again. This time, you hit your target.
That was two for you.
“Prophet, look out!” Yara shouted. Before you could discern which direction the threat was coming from, you were brutally thrown to the ground, the wind knocked out of you entirely.
Death wore the grisly face of the Demon standing above you.
You had dropped your dagger, leaving you completely defenseless.
Lev’s arrows pierced its throat twice.
It kept coming.
You blinked and it was on the ground. The Wolf knelt over it, hammer crashing over its skull repeatedly, past when the thing was decidedly dead, until the hammer actually broke in her hand.
You just blinked again.
She saved you.
Why did she save you?
You scrambled to your feet, your breaths coming too quickly.
You tried not to panic.
You had only almost died.
You were fine.
The Wolf dropped the splintered remnants of the hammer and stood, shaking out her hand. You stared as she walked over to where your dagger lay on the ground and bent to pick it up.
She looked at you for—as far as you could tell—the first time since you’d cut her down from the rope.
She walked over, holding your gaze.
You realized that she could kill you now. That that was likely why she had saved you.
So she could end you herself.
Because you were the Prophet, and a Seraphite. Or because you had nearly killed her before.
She could even do it with your own weapon. The one that had been meant for her.
You imagined that would be satisfying for a brutish Wolf.
As she approached, you noticed that she towered over you, making you doubly aware of the fact that this was not a fight you would win if it came down to it. Especially when you were unarmed.
She stopped when she stood only a couple feet in front of you, turning the dagger over in her hand and simply offering it to you, handle-first.
Dumbly, you slowly reached out and took it.
Her hand fell back to her side.
There was a hint of a smug little smile on her face, like she knew what you had been thinking.
“Try not to drop that again, yeah?” she said, voice low. It was the first time she’d spoken directly to you, and you resented the way it made your cheeks warm.
Before you could come up with a competent response, Yara interrupted.
“Prophet, Wolf! Come on. We have to move!” She held a lit torch in her uninjured hand. Lev stood at her side, ready to run.
“Where are you going?” the Wolf asked, unsure if she would be following. You were already moving to join Yara and Lev.
“Out of these woods. We’ve gotta run! Now! The coast is this way.”
They took off into the trees with you close behind. The sound of footsteps falling behind you informed you of the Wolf’s apparent decision to tag along, at least for the time being.
You could also hear more Demons, closing in on either side, chasing the torch’s light. Which meant they were after Yara.
You ran faster, trying to close the distance between you just in case.
As she passed an abandoned vehicle, one of the Demons jumped out, tackling her to the ground.
Lev shot an arrow through its head as you ran to her, pushing the dead Demon off and helping her back to her feet.
The horrifying chorus of even more of them, just beyond your vision, made you startle with each screech.
“They’re all around us!” Yara cried, moving closer to her brother.
The Wolf, weaponless after breaking the hammer, quickly looked around, finding a glass bottle. She grabbed it and threw it at the next creature that emerged from the forest.
The Demon slowed, momentarily stunned, and the Wolf wasted no time knocking it over and bringing her foot down on its skull hard and fast.
Just one stomp and it was dead.
You flushed again, transfixed.
Stupid.
You should not find that attractive.
But she was undeniably incredible.
You shook your head in an attempt to refocus as you turned to watch Lev take down another with a couple well-aimed shots.
A shriek behind you revealed the presence of yet another. You turned to meet it, killing the thing easily enough.
It seemed your training in combat had been sufficient after all, at least where Demons were concerned.
“That was the last of them,” Yara said.
“You guys okay?” the Wolf asked, like she might actually care.
“Yeah,” Lev breathed out, bow and arrow still at the ready.
“We have to keep moving before more come,” Yara insisted, taking up the lead again as she pressed forward.
You all ran after her.
“Every direction looks the same,” said the Wolf. You were inclined to agree. “You sure you know where you’re going?”
“It has to be this way,” Yara said, quietly determined.
“What the hell am I doing?” the Wolf muttered to herself under her breath.
The four of you picked up your speed as the Demons grew closer.
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Abby seriously had no idea what the hell she was doing.
She was running through the woods, fighting off Infected with three Scars.
And one of them was the Prophet.
Who had been fully intending to disembowel her not too long ago…
Something had to be wrong with her. Maybe it was brain damage from nearly suffocating.
Because this wasn’t like her.
A couple hours ago, Abby was killing Scars. Happily.
Well maybe that wasn’t the best word for it. It didn’t make her happy. She just didn’t feel bad about it.
And now, she was prancing through the forest and going out of her way to protect Scars?
The kids were one thing. They seemed to be just as in danger with other Scars as they were with the Infected.
What had that one woman called them? Apostates?
Abby had done enough reading to know what the word meant. She guessed they must have broken some stupid, insane rule and run off.
Or been kicked out.
Either way, from what Abby had gathered, they had gone rogue and were being hunted by their own people.
Which meant they weren’t necessarily her enemy.
But the other girl. The Prophet…
Abby didn’t know what was going on with you.
Were you going rogue too, or were your friends just dead and you needed help getting past the Infected and out of the woods?
And yeah, you had been about to kill her before. But you’d stopped as soon as there was a distraction. Took the out the second it was offered.
And then you had been the one to cut her down.
So maybe you didn’t want to kill her.
That counted for something, right?
Abby didn’t let herself think too much about how pretty you were.
How stunning your eyes looked when they met hers.
How your fingers felt, lightly grazing her bare skin for just a second, then leaving all too soon.
And how you had definitely blushed when she spoke to you.
See? She totally wasn’t thinking about any of that at all.
And she was probably delusional.
And way too distracted, spending any amount of time or energy thinking about such crazy shit while you were all actively running for your lives.
Abby was bringing up the rear of the group, and she knew a horde of Stalkers was not far behind her.
She really hoped these Scars knew where they were going.
“It’s just up here!” the girl, Yara, shouted from up ahead, leading the way to a wall of hanging vines.
The boy, Lev, pulled the vines aside, revealing an opening behind. Yara carefully but quickly maneuvered through. You waited until both she and Lev were on the other side before looking up at Abby expectantly.
There wasn’t time to argue, so Abby went next. You followed closely behind, then let the vines fall back into place, hiding your path from the Infected that pursued.
On the other side, Abby was met with the sight of several dead bodies, clearly recently slaughtered.
She couldn’t tell from this distance what had killed them. Or if they were Scar or WLF.
“Those are fresh. There another way around?” she asked, maneuvering around the corpses.
Lev spoke up. “If there were, would we be going this way?”
Okay. Fair point.
Yara pointed to a chain link fence with the torch. “Come on, Lev. Get it open.”
The kid tried to bend the steel wires up to create an opening. It didn’t budge, despite his efforts.
“Move,” Abby said. He did.
She strained as the piece of fencing gave way beneath her hands.
“Get in there, Prophet,” she said, teeth clenched.
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You quickly slid through the opening and popped up on the other side.
Finally, you were free of the suffocating forest.
The clearing was illuminated with light of the full moon.
You wandered on ahead as Lev, Yara, and the Wolf came through the fence behind you.
“Prophet?” A new voice spoke out as you turned the corner. The reverence in the person’s tone alone told you that you were dealing with a Seraphite.
You turned toward the voice to see a woman you recognized but whose name you couldn’t recall. She was large and stood tall, the side of her face bloody and a pickaxe in her grip.
She had been part of a patrolling squad in the area. You’d seen her briefly earlier in the day, with Emily, after the Wolf had been captured.
The woman saw that you were, in fact, who she thought you were, and she bowed her head out of respect.
“Are you alright, Prophet? What are you doing out here? Where is Emily?”
You were at a loss for words.
Her voice was calm and concerned now, but you knew that she would kill Lev, Yara, and the Wolf if given the chance.
“I—”
Your two friends entered the clearing behind you, drawing her eyes toward them.
“Apostates,” she hissed, and instantly her demeanor changed.
She rushed past you, ruthlessly throwing Yara to the ground and lifting Lev up by his neck.
You moved without thinking, your dagger still tightly clutched in your fingers. Again, you raised your arms above your head, just as you had done when fighting the Demons. Using all of your strength, you brought the blade down above her head, piercing her skull. The weapon was long enough that it exited through her chin.
Her body slackened and slumped to the ground. Dead.
You stared down at her, feeling the weight of what you had just done.
This wasn’t a Demon. It wasn’t an animal.
She was a living person.
And a Seraphite. One of your own people.
You were supposed to be her Prophet. Her leader. Her new hope.
She hadn’t been watching her back because she never imagined that you could betray your people like that. That you would pose a threat to her.
You continued to stare, holding your breath. You couldn’t look away.
You didn’t deserve to look away.
You felt a sob rising in your throat. Your eyes began to water.
No. You would not cry.
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Abby was the last to enter the clearing.
By then, the Scar was already holding Lev in the air, and you were already approaching from behind, lifting your dagger.
Abby watched as you killed her.
Woah.
You were good with that knife, she’d give you that.
Yara and Lev got back to their feet and watched as you stared down at the dead Scar, unmoving. Like you were frozen.
You weren’t even breathing, and you looked like you might cry.
Abby had been wondering how many WLF soldiers you killed today before you got to her. If the three she’d seen hanging when she first came to were yours.
Now, she was sure they weren’t.
Because based on your reaction, that had to be your first time.
She wasn’t usually one to be especially sensitive to the emotions of others, but when she heard you sniffle, finally taking in a ragged breath, she couldn’t help but move towards you.
Abby thought of her own first kill. How easy it was to do in the heat of the moment, but how torn up she’d been in the aftermath.
She understood that it was necessary, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t hard as hell.
She fought the urge to put a hand on your shoulder, or even rub your back soothingly. Reminded herself of who you were and who she was and all the reasons why she shouldn’t even be here right now.
Instead, she bent to retrieve your dagger from the body. She tried to hand it back to you, but you were still stuck, staring down.
“Hey. You did a good job.” She took your hand in hers, placing the handle into your palm and closing your fingers around it. She didn’t let go, allowing her hands to fully encompass yours.
Abby waited until you met her eyes. “You saved them,” she said, nodding towards Lev and Yara, who were both silently watching this unfold. “You did what you had to do.”
You drew your eyebrows together at that, like you wanted to argue. But you seemed to change your mind, ultimately just nodding your head lightly.
She let her hands drop and glanced back down at the slumped body again, her eyes catching on something.
“Wait. Is that my backpack?” Abby asked, looking more closely.
Beside her, you lifted your shoulder in a half-hearted shrug.
“Probably. Emily gave it to her earlier,” you said numbly.
Abby didn’t need to ask who Emily was. She could guess.
She reclaimed her belongings while you pulled yourself together.
“Are you two alright?” you asked the siblings.
“Yes, Prophet,” Lev answered, watching you closely. Abby noticed that you seemed to bristle ever so slightly at his use of your title. You didn’t say anything though.
She held her rifle in her hands again, happy to have her stuff back.
Especially the guns.
Wordlessly, the Scar kids led the way into the nearest building.
Out of habit, Abby began gathering supplies as you went along, taking ammo and medical supplies and anything else that seemed useful.
“How’s the arm?” she asked Yara, breaking the long stretch of silence.
“I have it under control,” the girl insisted defensively.
“Okay…” Abby took a box of ammo from a cabinet. “Grab any supplies you find.”
“We can’t touch this stuff. It’s Old World,” Lev said, like that should’ve been obvious.
“Are you fu---? You need supplies. We’re not out of the woods yet.” She opened and then shut a drawer. “Pun fucking intended.”
“What’s a pun?” Lev asked from another room.
Abby didn’t have the energy to answer that question.
Instead she said, “I’ve never seen Scars go after Scars like that before.”
“Seraphites,” you and Lev corrected in unison as you explored different rooms of the building.
Again, she ignored. “So what the hell did you do?”
“I shaved my head,” Lev answered simply.
Abby scoffed. “Fine. Don’t tell me.”
The group passed through building after dilapidated building, heading towards the coast. At least in theory.
“We’re almost there,” Yara said. “Just a little farther.”
She led the way down a steep drop-off into another run-down building. One where you wouldn’t be able to get back out the same way you went in.
“Now what?” Abby threw out, tired and frustrated.
“I’m quite confident it’s this way.”
“Quite confident?” Abby repeated incredulously.
“You don’t have to follow us,” Lev pointed out.
“You want me to leave you three out here alone?” Abby shot back.
Your response was an immediate and insistent, almost panicked, “No!”
Everyone else turned to you, surprised.
“Let’s just get out of here,” Lev offered.
Abby found the front doors, but they were held firmly closed by a metal gate on the outside.
Above the door was a large opening, too high for Abby to pull herself out of, but not too high for someone to climb through with a boost.
“If you get us through there, we’ll open the gate,” Lev said.
Abby remembered again that these were Scars she was dealing with. And like hell was she going to boost you all up to safety just so you could leave her stranded here.
“Get them out,” you said, as if you could read her mind. “I’ll stay with you.”
Lev started to protest but stopped after one shake of your head.
Abby nodded. “Okay. Come on.”
He gave you one last look before walking over to her, stepping into her open hands and pulling himself through the opening.
“Your turn.” Abby looked at Yara. “Watch that arm.” She carefully helped the injured girl maneuver up and out.
The all too familiar shriek of Infected sounded off behind you, coming from deeper in the building.
On the other side of the doors, Lev pushed at the gate. It wouldn’t budge.
“The gate’s stuck!”
“Fuck! Hurry up!” Abby looked back and forth between the door and the direction the Infected were coming from.
“We’ll look for another way!” Yara said, and the two of them disappeared from view.
Abby tried to stay calm and prepared herself for the inevitable fight.
“They’re not going to leave me,” you said, drawing her attention. You held your knife at the ready, rolling your shoulders back.
She didn’t respond, not sure if she believed you.
“They won’t,” you reiterated.
“I hope you’re right, Prophet.” She offered one of the weapons from her stash. “You ever shot a gun before?”
You shook your head but accepted the firearm anyway.
“Come here. I’ll show you.”
What Abby hoped would only be a few Infected turned out to be an entire horde. Runners, Stalkers, Clickers, and even a couple Shamblers.
You were fighting them off like a champ.
Seriously. She was impressed.
You’d kept the gun, watched her rushed demonstration on how to operate it, but ultimately chose to primarily stick with the dagger.
Both of you had been fighting for several minutes as you moved through the building. No sign of the other two Scars. Abby had pretty much resigned herself to needing to find her own way out.
She cleared the room she was in, lowering her weapon to take a breather.
You were in the next room, and it sounded like you had cleared that one out too.
The only warning Abby had before she felt the blow was you urgently shouting, “Wolf!”
A Stalker that she failed to notice had her pinned to the ground, knocking her rifle from her grip in the process.
It reared its head back as Abby struggled, fighting to get it off her.
A gunshot rang out, and the Infected slumped, lifeless.
She shoved it off her and sat up to see you standing there, borrowed gun still aimed and ready.
“Good girl!” Abby exclaimed, beaming up at you from where she sat on the floor.
Wait.
What the fuck?
She meant to say “good job”…
Actually, she hadn’t meant to say anything.
You lowered the weapon. Based on the look on your face, you were just as taken aback by her use of those words as Abby was. Although, she managed to keep it from showing on her face. Mostly.
She stood quickly and fumbled through a recovery. “Good shot. That was—I mean—It was a good… A good shot. Good job.”
You smiled softly at Abby’s obvious display of nerves, walking over to where her rifle had fallen when she was attacked.
You picked it up and returned it to her.
“Try not to drop that again, yeah?” you said, mimicking the teasing tone Abby had used when she said those same words to you earlier that night.
She made a face. Something that was equal parts embarrassment and amusement.
“Prophet! Over here!” came Lev’s quiet voice from the next room.
You shot Abby an I told you so look before the two of you ran after the sound.
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When Yara collapsed, the Wolf picked her up and carried her.
You listened as she quietly comforted your dear friend, encouraging her to keep breathing and promising to find somewhere to rest soon.
Your heart felt soft for her in that moment.
Or maybe you were just exhausted.
Lev led the group with you in the back, gun drawn and alert to the best of your current abilities.
You entered a clearing, full of enormous metal boxes and small, raised buildings. All things from the Old World that you had never seen before and didn’t have words for.
The Wolf instructed Lev to start checking the doors of all the small buildings. It took a few tries before he found one that was open.
The inside was in noticeably better shape than any other structure you’d seen on the mainland, with a few simple, fully intact pieces of furniture.
You watched as the Wolf moved through the first small room and into the second, carefully setting Yara down on the couch. She went over to the windows, checking again to make sure the four of you hadn’t been followed.
When Yara began to slowly remove her overshirt, you were quick to help, being especially careful with her injured arm.
It was swollen and bright red from her elbow down to her fingertips, visibly mangled. You had to bite back a gasp.
Lev stood on the other side of the room, a horribly worried expression on his face.
It wouldn’t be helpful for you to panic now.
“Hey,” you said to him, light and encouraging, drawing his gaze to you and away from his hurt older sister. “It just needs to be set. Okay?”
You turned your eyes to the Wolf who was still hovering by the window. “You know how to do that?”
The face she made confirmed what you already knew. Yara needed much more than just for the arm to be set.
Still, the Wolf walked over, instructing Lev to cut the discarded overshirt into strips and telling Yara to lean back.
You helped her, kneeling on the floor by the side of the couch where her head lay, ready to assist in any way you could.
“I’m gonna move it, okay?” said the Wolf.
“Okay.”
They were both speaking so softly.
“You ready?” she asked.
Yara nodded, reaching her uninjured hand out for one of yours. You held it, letting her squeeze as tightly as she needed to.
The crunching noise the arm made as it was set nearly made you sick.
Yara let out a series of pained noises, panting and grunting. You used your free hand to gently brush the loose strands of her hair from her face, tucking them behind her ears.
You whispered that the worst was over, and that she would be okay now.
You didn’t know if that was true, but you hoped it comforted her a little.
The Wolf broke a leg off a wooden chair, took the newly cut strips of fabric that Lev offered, and went to work bracing the newly-set arm, using the chair leg as a splint.
Yara watched the Wolf’s face.
“What’s your name?” she asked.
The Wolf secured the last piece of cloth before she answered, meeting Yara’s gaze.
“Abby,” she said.
She stood, looking to Lev and then to you.
“I should go,” the Wolf—Abby—said.
You stood too, to walk her out.
Lev quickly filled in the space that you left, kneeling the same spot and taking Yara’s waiting hand in his.
Abby grabbed her backpack and followed you into the first room, toward the door.
You paused, turning to face her.
“Are you—” You wanted to ask where she was going. What she would do next. Really, if you were being honest, you didn’t want her to go at all.
But you didn’t have the right to ask for any of those things, so instead you went with, “Are you okay?”
You gestured to your neck, meaning to indicate the dark, noose-shaped bruises that circled her own throat.
It felt like so long ago that she’d been hanging in front of you, unfortunate to find herself on the wrong end of your dagger. But, realistically, only a couple of hours had gone by.
She cleared her throat, her own fingers instinctively ghosting over the marks.
“Oh umm… Yeah. It’ll be fine.” She waited a beat before adding, “Thanks for cutting me down.”
You didn’t know what to say to that, considering it was technically your fault she needed to be cut down in the first place.
You settled on a nod and a tight smile.
She turned to go, twisting the doorhandle and stepping back out into the rain.
Before you could close the door behind her, she looked back and said, “This area gets a lot of traffic. Whatever shape she’s in…” Abby leaned closer, hand on the door frame, “You need to get out of here by tomorrow.”
Again, you nodded. “We’ll be fine.”
She held your gaze for a moment longer before she turned and walked down the steps.
You shut and locked the door.
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As Abby walked away from the office trailer, she couldn’t help the images that came to mind.
She kept envisioning you and Lev and Yara, dead.
Hanged and gutted by the Scars.
Or shot by the WLF.
Or ripped to shreds by Infected.
She had real responsibilities. A friend to look for. A whole community counting on her.
She had a war to get back to.
But if she left now, would she always wonder about what happened to you?
The urge to stay near you—to protect you—was so overwhelming. She didn’t know where it was coming from or what she should do with it.
You were not safe, but she knew you were much safer with her.
Isaac had warned her that the first Scar Prophet had been able to make even the most dedicated soldiers turn on a dime. He said that with just a few carefully chosen words, she could make a person question where their loyalties lied.
It had seemed so ridiculous just that morning, but now you were doing the same thing to Abby.
You were in her head.
But this didn’t feel like manipulation.
She didn’t know what it was that drew her to you, but it felt real. Natural. And entirely unintentional.
Or maybe she was reading you all wrong, and you really were a master manipulator.
Abby needed to make a decision. Because she was currently standing still in the pouring rain with the trailer still in view.
She chose to trust her gut.
And her gut was telling her to turn around. To stay with you.
Owen would have to wait.
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Note: Thank you to anyone who’s read all three chapters of this! The fact that literally anyone has is absolutely bonkers to me. I’ve already learned so much about myself as a writer since I started writing fics a couple weeks ago. For example, this week I learned that I DO NOT enjoy writing fight scenes… Unfortunately it was thoroughly unavoidable for this chapter. Regardless, I really hope it was interesting to read, and I’m looking forward to fleshing out the relationship between Abby and my reader more and more!
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razorblade180 · 1 day
Text
Safe Bet
[Swarm Disaster V]
Qingque:I heard you like to gamble?
Aventurine:You could call it the spice of my life. Let me guess, you’re betting I will do well?
Qingque:Oh that’s way too simple. We will have no healer.
Aventurine:…What?
Qingque:I tend to try to take things easy but after numerous failures here it’s only natural to form plans. I’m not betting on you doing well, I’m wagering your ability to protect us long enough for us to gather blessing I need plus curios.
Aventurine:And how long to you typically last in here?
Silver Wolf: The first elite. Sometimes we make it.
Sparkle:If we get resonance. Though your fellow gambler over here has gotten much more reliable since our last attempt.
Aventurine:..Alright. Let’s do it. Should be fun. Let’s see what’s about curio option number one!
Nullify attacks
QASS: (Oh shit this might actually be the run…)
Floor 2
Aventurine:Little lady, is there any reason why you refuse to keep a shield?
Silver Wolf: It’s not my fault these enemies understand who the real threat is. I’m alive aren’t I? Good job, but I recommend investing in speed.
Aventurine:Learn to take a hit.
Qingque:Don’t sweat it guys. It’s time for the easier part. *presses downloader*
Acheron:Hey. Oh, it’s you.
Aventurine:I think that’s my line. To think I’d get your aid in a place like this.
Acheron:I’m just here to cut through the fodder and potentially give you a chance to win it big. Consider me your guide.
Aventurine:We’re bound to get lost then.
Acheron:Heh, then I guess you’ll be getting enough blessings. Stay close.
xxxxx
Knight of beauty appears
Aventurine:Well would you look at that!
Sparkle:Okay, so I typically don’t care how far these runs go, but if you somehow ruin this I’m actually going to be disappointed.
Aventurine:Oh you know a situation is dire if I have a Fool acting serious. I was already planning on proving my value anyway.
Floor 3
Silver Wolf: Well it’s be real everyone. Don’t really need me for that oversized bug. It’s got every weakness you need.
Sparkle:What an interesting way of saying “I am a liability.”
Silver Wolf:It’s simple strategy. We didn’t come all this way to gain nothing. I’ll just cheer from the bench. Qingque, don’t miss your crits. *
Qingque:I literally can’t.
Silver Wolf:And don’t eat too many points. *leaves*
Qingque:…No promise. *hits downloader*
Ruan Mei: Shall we begin?
Aventurine:All this talent and you needed my help?
Ruan Mei:Have you ever felt the wind shear of a Swarm Disaster? Some people say it’s like a personal hurricane on your body.
Qingque:I’m “some people”
xxxxxx
20+ Propagation blessings. Various Curios, interplays achieved, and additional blessings gained. Danger level Eight
Swarm buzzing violently
Qingque:I’m gonna be honest guys, I don’t know if I’m trembling because I’m nervous, or because this is about to be pretty spectacular. Aventurine, if you would? *holds out tiles*
Aventurine:Heh, you really want all the luck possible huh? Alright then, strut yourself.
He leans over to his left and gently blows on the pieces.
“Let’s play a game!” Qingque tosses them into the air and twirls as metamorphosis begins; catching the pieces as they fell. Without stopping, she throws out a four of kind then immediately flicks her wrist like a slite of hand trick to reveal another set of tiles to throw.
The experienced gambler watches the girl pass the tiles between her hands twice before throwing another eight, killing a bug and keeping the pace by tossing a new set once before suddenly slamming down a tile that shakes everything and hands her another four of a kind she quickly turned into eight. It’s still her turn. Gambling is partly a numbers game, and Qingque has clearly crunched them.
Aventurine:(Oh shit…)
Sparkle:Wooooo! Don’t stop the fireworks!
Three more tosses before another hit! No worries! Qingque happily took a single tile and beamed it another insect before slamming down another that caused it to explode. She tossed her set to a corner bug as she took another break turn to eat up all four points before hearing Sparkle laughing as she topped off the difference.
Qingque: Can’t stop won’t stop!
Another eight tiles exploded and knocked the main bug down briefly. Aventurine was thinking he didn’t need to be here, until it got back up and tore through the shield like paper. Without hesitation he let his wealth pour down like rain and redeployed a shield. He confidently scoffed, but Ruan Mei could see his hand twitch in his pocket.
Ruan Mei:Fear is a healthy way of understanding your current situation as well providing alertness. Are you alert?
Aventurine: Vividly. *stacks shield*
Ruan Mei:Welcome to the Swarm Disaster.
Qingque:You get a front row seat to VICTORY!
1,500,000
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zzoguri · 3 days
Text
persist and resist (but still, fail) ➵ lee juyeon
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lee juyeon x reader
all it takes is one phone call for you to realize what you could’ve had with juyeon
genre/warnings ➵ angst, almost lovers, long-distance but not-in-a-relationship, unspoken words/hidden signals, a lot of wondering of what could’ve been
word count ➵ 730 words
inspired by ➵ “the 1” by taylor swift, that one skype call in “past lives”
a/n ➵ very reminiscent of my upcoming jichang fic entitled “finger trapped (ripped to its seams)” but its taking a bit to pump out (and i'm very much in my feelings as we speak...) so bear with me and enjoy this drabble for now :33 do reblog and leave feedback!!
want to be part of my taglist? send me an ask! masterlist
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it’s quiet uptown. as you smell the winter air, frozen kisses graze your cheeks. sounds of cars have been replaced with the buzzing of lamposts and flakes have taken raindrops’ role. on the snow-piled balcony, you hear the wood crackle behind you.
yet, warmth is stored in the voice on the other line.
“so, what’s it like there?” the rasp that accompanies juyeon’s words remind you of the time zone difference between you two. while it may be crack of dawn in korea, night has fallen at where you stand.
“you’ve asked that question how many times in this call.” a giggle leaves you. “you’re making me think that you never listen.”
a soft hum leaves him. “you know that’s not true.” your fingers grip on the blanket draped on your shoulders. “what are you up to?”
“damn, not even letting me answer the thousand questions you seem to have for me.”
“sorry,” he chuckles, “just never hear from you.”
for a moment, all you can do is sniffle.
“it’s quiet here. everyone’s off to see their families.” your hand reaches out to rail, writing the characters of his name on the snow, as you bask in the stillness of the town. “i like it like this.”
“like it like what?”
“when it’s not busy. it’s only during the winter time when you’ll barely hear a horn or chatter.” a smile makes its way to your lips. “kind of like when we’d sneak into school during the summer time.”
heat waves would do its best to tie you down then, draining you of any energy to enjoy the wonders of summer, but you and juyeon were drawn to adventures. while there would be trips to the mart to grab the familiar taste of chocolate popsicles or the playground you’ve bruised your knees at, the school seemed to call on your names. the empty hallways whispered the narratives of students who came before you two—you were certain that yours and juyeon’s story would be told, as well.
“god, i can’t believe we had so much time to waste then,” juyeon admits over the memory. only a hum leaves you. “i miss it.”
a beat passes.
“yeah, me too.” the whisper barely leaves you.
there’s a life in korea that you’ve lost—the quiet exchange of laughter during classes, the smell of fresh kkwabaegi fresh from the fryer, and the nights spent stargazing.
but in the life you have now—in the stillness of your room during midnights, the rush hours of your commute, the conservations you have with the locals—you can’t help but wonder, wonder, wonder. 
would you be in a 9-to-5 job at a corporate workplace or performing at sold-out venues? would you wake up early in the morning to bake or would you sleep in the comfort of your own bed? or would you go back to school and dive into the niche topics you’ve always wanted to explore?
but would you live alone in a different part of korea or travel around the world with him? would you wake up to the smell of freshly-cooked pancakes or microwaved fried rice from the night before? or would he latch to your body that’s reached the highest degrees, or would you make him soup during flu season? (he’s always had a weak immune system. did that change?) 
there’s a life in korea that you long for—and there’s a person that you’ve lost. if things were only different, maybe you’d have him for many orbits around the sun.
did he ever think of a life you two could’ve had?
“hey, i have to go,” you say.
“oh,” juyeon’s tone is laced with disappointment, “okay.”
for a moment, not a word is exchanged between you two.
“talk soon?” his question takes you by surprise.
you would’ve loved to agree—yes! i’ll make sure to come visit—but you only smile to yourself with held back tears.
“bye, juyeon.”
that was enough of an answer for him. “okay. bye.”
the call drops. the warmth that your phone held has disappeared. while it makes sense to retreat back into your flat, bask in the heat emitting from the fireplace and read the words of sylvia plath, you remain standing on the snow-piled balcony.
it didn’t matter what you two could’ve had. it didn’t matter if he wondered the same things.
but it could’ve been him—that’s all you know.
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perma taglist ➵ @deoboyznet@kflixnet@blankjournal@winterchimez@miusgirl@jenoscafe@sweet-unicorn-world@vernyangel@mosviqu@stealanity@deobi0412@blue-rainydays@maessseongs
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sporesgalaxy · 4 months
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The tyrant op scrangle mentions is the self proclaimed king of the world?
ooh hehe I like the idea that Onepieceworld Scrangle knows about a huge reveal like that!! I will keep chewing on this, thank you!!!!
for tonight I tried really hard to build on this or any op!Scrangle ideas and just never got anywhere...brain's crusty..... here's my surviving doodles from while I brainstormed 😔
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starflungwaddledee · 4 months
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which ocs in the fandom do you find the most interesting? also, which ocs do you think have the most aesthetically pleasing designs? finally, which ocs have you only heard of but would like to know more about?
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh nooooooo ha haaa noooo i can't possibly answer this because it would be soooo unfair to have favourites wouldn't it's comet knight by @kittenvirus
#sorry it's the colour scheme and the glitter and the fluff. i'm unfortunately so so weak to all these things 😭#even a little bit of pastel rainbow star theming specifically... comet really has everything i'm sorry to say#i think starstruck would faint immediately if she saw him. could they be friends?? i'm not sure i think she'd just be like this: 👁️👁️#he is also one of (if not the very) first designs i saw when i started picking around the kirby community#so i'll always have a soft spot for him no matter who else i discover.#there are also a dozen other OCs that i love and adore but the more that i list the more folks will feel that i didn't list *them*#and i really really don't want to do that! my mutuals have some absolutely banging designs as do some folks who i don't follow!#there are also a lot of REALLY cool designs that are 'semi' oc but are more like redesigns? from folks AUs or comics or so on#many great morpho-esque redesigns out there too i'm always a fan of those!!!#please understand i'm listing only ONE design that hits all these prompts (bc i also don't know the creator well hence 'only heard of')#and one that always stands out to me personally because of the sentimentality i mentioned above#but i love MANY many many. if i started listing them i would never stop!! if you have an oc or a design i probably love them!!#i realise that is a bit of a dodge of the breadth of this question but i just... yknow? haha#i'd be happy to learn more about any ocs really!! i would actually love for starstruck to start having some relationships with others too?#if folks are interested in that!! she has relationships with the dream land four but not so much with ocs; and that might be fun too!!#others ocs#asks
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wormy-worm · 18 days
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ok u know what maybe if the world isn't ready for sunrazer post that means that the world IS ready for Amoveous siblings post. This is Milo and Enho and theyre my DARLINGS and i love them SO MUCH. i have. SOOOOOOOO many thoughts abt them but after the previous post massacre i do not really feel like typing all of that xoxo love <3
#THESE DRAWINGS HAVE BEEN SITTING IN MY DRAFTS FOR MONTHS LOL#meart#original character#robot oc#ily enho ily milo my darlings my angels my loves my funny robot guys.#ive posted abt Andromeda on here b4 if u remember her Enho is her best friend !!!!!#Enhos a battle robot who doesnt want 2 fight people..#hes the oldest sibling and theres a lot resting on their shoulders!#shes supposed to be this big metal protector but U.U she just wants to hide in his room.. and make music for the internet..#him and andy have this whole arc abt like. autonomy and identity and junk#being as andy is a government experiment who was raised to be a superhero who. has not yet realized that she HATES being a superhero lol#Enho inspires her!#milo um. does his own thing. he was the second amoveous bot and he is lucky to have been built without the responsibility of a battle bot#which means hes a LOT weaker. doesnt have a million weapons and lasers and such like enho does. no one expects much of him. he HATES IT!!!!#he wants to be POWERFUL! he wants to HURT PEOPLE!! he wants to be USEFUL!!! hes ANGRY ALL THE TIME#its EXSAUSTING.#yk that tinkerbell thing thats like. cuz shes so small she can only feel one emotion at once. and its so big it consumes her entirely?#hes that. he lives entirely in extremes. everything is 100% for him#he jumps to conclusions so quick and so violently.. hes incredibly impulsive and it gets him into a lot of trouble.#hes also a total NERD!!! GOOB!!! says mlady unironically. likes bad computer games. wears a stupid tie everyday. cartoonishly schemes 24/7#enho for the record is also a pretty angry person. they just dont rlly express it. they dont express much of anything lol.#shes semiverbal on a talkative day. he can be REALLY REALLY PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE THO. THAT MF CAN BE SO PETTY. GOOFY ASS#but shes TERRIFIED she'll lose control of her emotions and her body and that shell hurt someone someday. absolutely terrified.#enho is as afraid of his strength as milo is of his weakness. theyre both two ends of the same extremes in a lot of ways.#polar opposites and yet exactly the same. they resent each other a lot. they need to learn to meet each other in the middle.#anyway ''i dont feel like typing all that'' and then i ramble in the tags for ten million years lol ToT I LOVE THESE GUYS#theyre my oldest ocs in this universe and i have so many thoughts if you have any questions feel free to ask me lol
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kenobster · 1 month
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Everything about recovery is just so unfair.
You're living a certain way, probably because it's been the only way that made you feel okay, and then you find out that your way of living isn't serving you as well as you thought it was. So you have to learn from scratch how to live a completely different way. At a time when you're at your lowest, when you're most exhausted, when you most need to feel safe, you have to do the opposite of what has been helping. It's the only way to get better.
Worse, everyone else has had a huge head start. Years and years ago, they all learned how to do the things that you're just barely learning now. And whether or not they mean to, they expect you to know how to do the things you don't know how to do. If you're frustrated or struggling or just need a break sometimes from this New Way of Living, then that's too bad. Your mental health is your responsibility now. You're expected to take expert accountability for things you only have a novice's understanding of — and at a time when you're the most prone to the habits the pain has been causing you.
It's just so impossibly hard, and you have to do it all without even an ounce of hope that it'll get any easier.
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silenthillbunni · 1 month
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🐁☁️🌫️
#sorry gnna sound like a shit person now but im not feeling well i just need to rant#nothing good ever happens to me. every aspect of my life is a mess. im constantly miserable w nothing to pull me out of it#it's been getting worse nd worse for years nd if it keeps getting worse im not gnna be able to take it much longer#ofc there are sooo many others who have it way way way worse than i do. so i feel weak nd pathetic for being so affected by it when i know#it could be literally sm worse than it is now. like i get that. i know im not nearly as bad off as many ppl are#but idk still it's rlly tough to have *nothing* that makes me keep going. the literal only thing is that i dont kms bc i dont wanna hurt mom#bc im poor so i cant do ANYTHING. i cant go anywhere. not the cinema not concerts not to the mall not to the bookstore not an amusent park#i cant even go to cafées bc i dont have any money at all to spend on that#i have no friends to hang out w. even if i couldnt afford going anywhere i cant even just take a walk or sit nd talk to them bc there r none#my sisters havent talked for me in over a year#and like yada yada i dont have anything to pull me out of my misery bubble. no friends to comfort me no family to hang out w#nothing to do or nowhere to go. hell i havent even been able to eat for 8 months so i cant even like eat smth yummy nd watch a movie lmao#i cant even read bc of the constant noise! i cant go out into the forest bc there r always subway construction work or choppers or gun shots#i know im 'focusing on the negative' but what am i supposed to do when theres nothing positive to focus on lol?????#im always physically uncomfortable bc of pain nd health issues nd im always anxious nd stressed too so like... yay#and. this is where i sound mean but like after years nd years of nothing good happening to me... idc for others anymore like#when they talk abt their loving relationships and their kind friends nd them going to concerts im like.. wow !! u get to be happy!! i dont!!#im just envious nd jealous nd bitter bc why cant i have ANYTHING good???? not just ONE fkn thing?#other ppl get to have multiple things but i get nothing?????#and its not exactly like i hate them or wish illwill on them im just like wow kinda dont feel sympathy for u bc u have sm things#i've never had :))) nd u can never understand how awful it feels to be deprived of it so idc :))))
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starpros-sunshine · 5 months
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Also I have to confess when Eichi does the the "I've heard usually people do this and this" or anything in that vein as a statement it's so real to me
#speaking as someone who learned most of their way of existing from tv and movies ans audio books and audio dramas.#I wasn't confined to a hospital bed I was just very enamored with movies and TV shows and audio dramas#and never really interested in interacting with other kids#and I'm an only child#and my social life began around this winter when people started celebrating their birthdays and inviting me and hanging out and inviting me#before that I never did anything with my friend acquaintances#We're too close to be acquaintances but i don't like labeling people as friends it puts an obligation on the relationship#there's one of them i genuinely consider a friend but we mostly talk about our interests and that's where it stops#she's the only one I talk with outside of the shared WhatsApp chat and ever since her number one friend found another number one friend#We've started talking more because what else am I supposed to do#it's nice. I'm a tea drinker now.#somewhat#in movies they always have bigger friend groups but i cant manage that many relationships at once#so it's better if I reserve the term friend for people who I actually talk to outside of certain contexts#but yeah it's so interesting when life imitates art#teenagers are supposed to get drunk right recently I accidentally got drunk enough to deliver the finishing blow to an already weak glass#never doing that again imagine the things I could've revealed about myself#but it's a fascinating experience because now I can look at that in fiction and understand!!#and I've been told I'm a bit cartoonish in the way I carry myself#which is a little funny to me because I as a person am pretty apathetic to a Lot of things#few things that make me happy a lot of things that annoy me and the rest is jusg kind of in the soup#but it's fine rhats just what being normal is like i guess#i should sleep it's lateeeeee and I need to get up early tomorrow.#regrettably#enjoy the tags while you still can because those things will be going down with this post in a few hours when I'm awake again and#less uncomfortable with sharing any kind of personal information
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wiinterbunny · 9 months
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... 📓🖊
#my mom has started talking abt moving...#and it is kinda ridiculous because i'll be 25 soon. and i'm still clinging onto my mother#i *want* to be independent and live on my own. but i think i'm too weak to do it.#and her just talking about moving away soon makes me feel extreme dread and fear...#(she also says i should stay in this apartment and have it on my own. she says it in a loving way tho. she wants me to grow up)#(but i dont want to.... so many parts of my childhood are missing from me. i dont think i can)#(the thought of being resonsible for rent... finding a job... fear of being without a home.. too much)#i dont want to... and if i dont live with my mother i'll have NO ONE to talk to#i'll be so lonely... for real... i will probably not talk with anyone at all. and just spend my existence on my own#my mom is the only one i have... how can i live without her???? she's also my only friend#what am i gonna do what am i gonna do... im so scared#i feel so alone :((#i dont know how im gonna fix this or what im gonna do#when i talk to my mom... she's understanding she is. but we both know i cant spend the rest of my life living with her#she also wants her own life T-T and it'd be embarrassing to stick with her thru my entire 20s... 30s.. 40s... idk#i have to be on my own but i dont want to#im also scared that with my avpd... i'll grow distant from her and never feel truly connected to her again#she doesnt understand my personality disorder. even if i try to explain she just dont get it!!!!#i'll always be alone and disconnnected from everyone. esp if i dont even have my mom...#i just wanna d1e ngl.. :(#💭​diary
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deoidesign · 10 months
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A general cane guide for writers and artists (from a cane user, writer, and artist!)
Disclaimer: Though I have been using a cane for 6 years, I am not a doctor, nor am I by any means an expert. This guide is true to my experience, but there are as many ways to use a cane as there are cane users!
This guide will not include: White canes for blindness, crutches, walkers, or wheelchairs as I have no personal experience with these.
This is meant to be a general guide to get you started and avoid some common mishaps/misconceptions in your writing, but you absolutely should continue to do your own research outside of this guide!
This is NOT a medical resource!!! And never tell a real person you think they're using a cane wrong!
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The biggest recurring problem I've seen is using the cane on the wrong side. The cane goes on the opposite side of the pain! If your character has even-sided pain or needs it for balance/weakness, then use the cane in the non-dominant hand to keep the dominant hand free. Some cane users also switch sides to give their arm a rest!
A cane takes about 20% of your weight off the opposite leg. It should fit within your natural gait and become something of an extension of your body. If you need more weight off than 20%, then crutches, a walker, or a wheelchair is needed.
Putting more pressure on the cane, using it on the wrong side, or having it at the wrong height can make it less effective, and can cause long term damage to your body from improper pressure and posture. (Hugh Laurie genuinely hurt his body from years of using a cane wrong on House!)
(some people elect to use a cane wrong for their personal situation despite this, everyone is different!)
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(an animated GIF of a cane matching the natural walking gait. It turns red when pressure is placed on it.)
When going up and down stairs, there is an ideal standard: You want to use the handrail and the cane at the same time, or prioritize the handrail if it's only on one side. When going up stairs you lead with your good leg and follow with the cane and hurt leg together. When going down stairs you lead with the cane and the bad leg and follow with the good leg!
Realistically though, many people don't move out of the way for cane users to access the railing, many stairs don't have railings, and many are wet, rusty, or generally not ideal to grip.
In these cases, if you have a friend nearby, holding on to them is a good idea. Or, take it one step at a time carefully if you're alone.
Now we come to a very common mistake I see... Using fashion canes for medical use!
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(These are 4 broad shapes, but there is INCREDIBLE variation in cane handles. Research heavily what will be best for your character's specific needs!)
The handle is the contact point for all the weight you're putting on your cane, and that pressure is being put onto your hand, wrist, and shoulder. So the shape is very important for long term use!
Knob handles (and very decorative handles) are not used for medical use for this reason. It adds extra stress to the body and can damage your hand to put constant pressure onto these painful shapes.
The weight of a cane is also incredibly important, as a heavier cane will cause wear on your body much faster. When you're using it all day, it gets heavy fast! If your character struggles with weakness, then they won't want a heavy cane if they can help it!
This is also part of why sword canes aren't usually very viable for medical use (along with them usually being knob handles) is that swords are extra weight!
However, a small knife or perhaps a retractable blade hidden within the base might be viable even for weak characters.
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Bases have a lot of variability as well, and the modern standard is generally adjustable bases. Adjustable canes are very handy if your character regularly changes shoe height, for instance (gotta keep the height at your hip!)
Canes help on most terrain with their standard base and structure. But for some terrain, you might want a different base, or to forego the cane entirely! This article covers it pretty well.
Many cane users decorate their canes! Stickers are incredibly common, and painting canes is relatively common as well! You'll also see people replacing the standard wrist strap with a personalized one, or even adding a small charm to the ring the strap connects to. (nothing too large, or it gets annoying as the cane is swinging around everywhere)
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(my canes, for reference)
If your character uses a cane full time, then they might also have multiple canes that look different aesthetically to match their outfits!
When it comes to practical things outside of the cane, you reasonably only have one hand available while it's being used. Many people will hook their cane onto their arm or let it dangle on the strap (if they have one) while using their cane arm, but it's often significantly less convenient than 2 hands. But, if you need 2 hands, then it's either setting the cane down or letting it hang!
For this reason, optimizing one handed use is ideal! Keeping bags/items on the side of your free hand helps keep your items accessible.
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When sitting, the cane either leans against a wall or table, goes under the chair, or hooks onto the back of the chair. (It often falls when hanging off of a chair, in my experience)
When getting up, the user will either use their cane to help them balance/support as they stand, or get up and then grab their cane. This depends on what it's being used for (balance vs pain when walking, for instance!)
That's everything I can think of for now. Thank you for reading my long-but-absolutely-not-comprehensive list of things to keep in mind when writing or drawing a cane user!
Happy disability pride month! Go forth and make more characters use canes!!!
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kindacreepy-kindaugly · 3 months
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I mean I knew it'd bite me in the ass sooner or later havin him on this damn pedestal when I know he's really just some guy w/ a fuckton of baggage but
Goddamn it I just needed someone.
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