How do you guys drink your coffee?

Steve: Have you guys seen Y/N and Peter? They still have chores to do.

Tony: No, haven’t seen them since the storm started.

Steve: Since the sto-? Y/N, NO!

Y/N, standing in the middle of a thunderstorm, with Steve’s shield raised high: STRIKE ME DOWN ZEUS, YOU DON’T HAVE THE BALLS!

(Bonus)

Tony: What the fu-?

Tony: Wait. Where’s Peter?

Peter: *Making mud-angels*

Peter Parker most definitely runs an Incorrect Quotes Tumblr account dedicated solely to the Avengers - except every single quote is actually something one of the Avengers has actually said

Peter : I’M CALLING MY FATHER !

Flash : You don’t HAVE a father.

Tony, showing up 5 seconds later, blasting through the wall : The fuck did you say you little shit

(I'm sorry in advance XD ) Ok guys, what goes in first, the cereal or the milk?

Y/N: Okay, so let’s go over this one more time.

Y/N: If something breaks?

Peter: We try to fix it before Tony finds out!

Y/N: Yes! And if that doesn't work?

Peter: We blame it on Loki!

Loki: Honestly, fuck you guys.

Peter: Hey Tony

Tony: Yeh?

Peter: What’s Captain America’s favourite drink?

Tony: err

Peter: Iced Americano!

Tony:

Tony:

Tony: Ill give you five bucks if you go and tell that joke to Steve right now.

*Steve and Tony beating each other up in the kitchen*

Peter : Can I get a waffle ? Can I plEaAaAse get a waffle ?

Tony: Who hurt you?

Peter: Do you want a list or what?

Tony, getting his blasters ready: Actually, yes.

Peter *awake at 3am*: who tf named it “emotional baggage” and not “griefcase?”

Tony: a-

Steve: what are your superpowers, son?

peter: uh, heightened senses, depression, enhanced speed, agility and stamina, yo mamma jokes-

steve: yo mamma jokes?

peter: well, mr. america, i’m an orphan so they can’t say anything back

tony: kid-

stephen: you don't want tony to die.

stephen: and i don't want tony to die.

stephen: so now we gotta make sure tony doesn't want tony to die.

peter: good plan but have you met mr stark

Tom: can you pass the salt?

Harrison: can you stop being an annoying piece of shit?

Tom:

Tom: too much salt haz.

Peter: I drink to forget but I always remember

Tony: Peter, you’re drinking a capri sun

I believe that if we say 'ok boomer' enough, the boomers will implode

Peter Parker, after getting an F on his English paper. 

peter: you can’t kill me if I kill myself first.

tony: WHAT KIND OF LOGIC IS THAT

stephen: actually, yours.

Tom: I’m small, but knowing.

Harrison: You don’t even know what the top shelf looks like.

Tom:....bitch.

this ones called "I think im funny bc I like to add my own goddamn texts posts to pictures of peter parker"

Tony: Hi-

Peter: ⁱ’ˡˡ ᵇᵉ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵍᵘⁱᵈᵉ

Tony: What?

Peter: ...

Tony: ...

Peter: I’LL BE YOUR GUIDE, I’LL BE YOUR G-U-I-D-E TO THE OTHER SIDE

Tony: What have I done

peter: i like a man who's environmentally aware.

wade, pointing outside: that’s a cloud