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ffsg0jo · 2 years

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- a o t c h a r a c t e r s a s t r o p e s -

aot characters x tropes [reiner,, annie,, zeke,, porco,, pieck,, colt]

WARNINGS: following/stalking,, reference to sex,, -- masterlist

a/n: you already know the drill. the hold this idea has on me i stg, it's peak. anyways this is the last part, thank god :))

part 1,, part 2,, part 3

REINER : forbidden love - you're his psychologist and he's your client. you two are part of rival schools and he rescues you from a douchebag and he's like ill take you to school every single day. typical wattpad romance.

it’s like modern day romeo and juliet tbh but instead of families it’s school. your schools have always been at each others throats. its dated back to a rivalry founded hundreds of years ago. there’s constant fights breaking out between your schools and even the headteachers are involved.

they absolutely despise each other. one day, when you’re walking home after class, in the dark, you can sense someone following you. creeped out, and wanting to go home you decide to take a shortcut. obviously that doesnt work out because now you’re lost and you dont know what to do.

you try and look for someone to ask for help but all you see is a group of people, underneath the streetlight smoking. you decide to take a chance and go towards them. immediately a boy with blonde hair and a slight beard sees your state and the guy following you and recognises what's happening. he calls you over, like you’re his friend and put his arm around you.

the guy following you sees the stares he’s getting from the group of people and decides to walk away. i honestly could write a fic about this and i actually might. but just imagine romeo and juliet, but without the marriage and tragic ending. also there’s a maassiveeee fight between boyfriend reiner and ex eren. it’s great.

ANNIE : friends to lovers - you were introduced to annie through pieck and you thought she was cool and wanted to hang out more with each other. and one thing led to another and now you're married :)

you and pieck were good friends having went to primary and secondary school together. so when she introduces you to her other friends you feel happy, like you’ve levelled up your relationship stats in a game or something. you’ve met everyone, except annie and they’re a nice bunch, and you decided to hang out with them more.

the next time you hang out, it’s a small party with just you guys and that’s where you meet annie. she seemed different from the rest and you really liked her company. believe it or not but you guys literally spent the whole time talking to each other and you exchanged numbers by the end of it.

from then on you two magically started bumping into one another more, by some sort of miracle. it’s like the world was trying to push you two together by making you meet more often. and of course, naturally this led you two to hang out more, without the others present. you’d get coffee together before classes, work in the library and have lunch together as well.

you eventually caught feelings for annie and decided to just go for it and ask her out. the worst that could happen was her saying no. so one day over coffee you asked her if you could maybe grab lunch sometimes and she was like sure, just tell me when. and you’re like no, as a date. and annie stops mid sip and she looks at you with a little blush and nods her head and says sure again.

ZEKE : office romance - you and zeke work together and just casually flirt, nothing serious. but then you two actually start falling for each other and find yourself missing each other when you’re off work

on the first day of your job, zeke was the first person you met. and he was nothing but kind and welcoming, making you feel at ease jn the new environment. he knew what it was like to be the new person, so he invited you to have lunch with him and a few others to introduce you and get you started.

it became routine between the two of you and as you got more comfortable you both started joking around more and teasing each other and also occasionally flirting. he essentially became your work husband.

he’d purposefully take the long route when going to the break room just so he can walk past your desk and lean against the table and flirt with you and talk to you a little. and on the way back he drops off a freshly made coffee at your desk with a wink.

this is making me wish i worked in a corporate office job with zeke goddamnit.

anyways, you guys actually become good friends outside of work, going to get drinks together with his friends from high school and literally everyone sees the way he looks at you and thinks you’re perfect for each other. he even took you home once when he found out you weren’t doing anything for the holidays and his step mum, my baby carla loves you.

you also realised that good looks run in the family because holy moly they’re all so good looking. if carla wasn’t married, you defo would've hit on her more because she’s a milf and a half. you also met his half brother eren, who is, you know. hot af. it was actually eren that told you how much zeke liked you and how great of a couple you and zeke would make.

he regrets telling you because for the next couple of days he hears banging and thumping coming from the bedroom on top of his, which just so happens to belong to zeke.

PORCO : exes to lovers - with porco it was right person wrong time. you both weren't mentally ready or in the right space for a relationship and decided to break it off despite loving each other. but a couple of year later, when you returned for one of your mutual friends wedding, you find yourself looking at porco, and wishing it was you and him at the altar instead.

you and porco first got together when you were in high school together, and while your relationship seemed perfect, the both of you were under extreme pressure to perform well academically and make your families proud. with the added commitment of a relationship you both mutually decided to break up, thinking it was unfair to chain each other to a relationship neither could commit to fully.

that didn't mean you didn't love each other though. porco truly was the only person for you and the same for him. for the rest of high school neither of you dated, and when you got to university, you only had flings. nothing more. not a day went by without you thinking about porco.

after you’ve graduated and settled in to your new job, you receive an invite to a wedding, finding out one of yours and porco’s friends are getting married. immediately you respond saying of course you’ll attend! you’d be stupid not to.

you arrive at the venue on the day when all of a sudden you bump into someone and as you look up and go to apologise you realise it’s porco. you let out a small gasp and appreciate the way he’s matured over the years and turned into a muscular, strong man. sis had a glow up frr

you both felt your love for each other rush back to you and you fell in love with porco once again. just as your about to say something you’re both ushered into your seats, with the ceremony about to begin.

during the exchanging of the vows you catch porco staring at you and you both wonder what would've been if you had stayed together all those years ago. would you and porco have been at the altar, exchanging vows and proclaiming your undying love for each other? still staring at him you smile, making a mental not to talk to him at the reception, to see if he was still single.

PIECK : strangers to friends to lovers - i love pieck. with her it’s just a steady and gradual development into a beautiful relationship

i feel like ive repeated some of these but pieck just strikes me as a very dependable and safe person. she has really comforting vibes and is just someone you grow to love more and more, the more you get to know her.

everything about pieck is a nice surprise, like wow she has cats, could she even become any more perfect. the answer is yes, yes she can.

the two of you take things really slow and you kinda just let things happen and progress naturally instead of forcing it. you both know that if its meant to be then it will, and you both strongly feel as though you're eachother's 'one'.

just being with pieck is good vibes. she's so loving but teasing at the same time. she'll tease you and watch you get all flustered with a smirk on her face. she's hot af.

unrelated but do you guys remember when the jean x pieck ship was starting to gain more traction. that was actually amazing now that I think about it. i don't personally ship it but I can see why other people would. its cute.

COLT : brothers babysitter to lovers - i feel like im making some of these tropes up but it makes sense to me, let me just explain it.

your parents were always friendly with colt's so when your parents heard they needed a baby sitter for their cute little toddler falco, your parents offered to ask you if you'd be willing to do it.

having met the Grice's a couple of times and being familiar with them you agreed saying why not. you loved baby sitting, especially when they were calm kids like falco.

so you go over to their house and knock on the door and a guy thats around your age with blonde hair opens the door for you, with a little miniature version of him standing behind his legs. you recognised flaco but you no idea who this man was. luckily mrs grice saw you though and ushered you inside.

she quickly introduced him as colt, falco's older brother, who is visiting for the holidays, and then thanks you for agreeing to babysit falco and tells you to make yourself at home and feel free to take anything from the fridge.

she rushes out of the house with her husband, leaving you with colt and falco. colt, being the gentleman that he is offers to show you around the house and also shows you the emergency exits and stuff just in case something happens.

he ends up leaving to go out to see his friends and that leaves you alone with falco, who is just the most well behaved, good mannered child in the world. he's such a pleasure to look after and barely causes any trouble.

colt starts hearing more about you through falco who absolutely loves you. he thinks you're the best baby sitter in the world and even calls refers to you as his older sister. colt finds himself developing a crush on you and its falco that pushes him and encourages him to ask you out.

falco is adamant that you like colt as much as colt likes you, expecially since you're always asking about his older brother, and if he'll be coming home anytime soon. its cute <33

#🌻.sunspell #🌻.attack on titan #🌻.fluff #🌻.angst #aot #attack on titan #aot x reader #attack on titan x reader #reiner x reader #colt x reader #zeke x reader #pieck x reader #porco x reader #annie x reader #tahonet #tht.sinta #spirithub #hqlabels

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sashaspotatocrumb · 2 years

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PLAY PRETEND ੈ✩‧₊˚

jean kirschstein x fem!reader

blurb: where unintentionally waiting for each other wasn't the worst case scenario. featuring two idiots who continue to skirt around the affections of one another. spoiler: you and jean.

cw: foul language, kind of a soulmate thing but not really (not talked about), a little bit of pieck x reader, sex scenes, cheating, pure lovey shit, angst, drugs and alcohol use, sometimes careless reader (shame on you), traveling, commitment issues, sex work, and drama.

theme code: ✩ = smut

last update: tbd

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chapter index

[ SERIES ONE ]

chapter 001 - The Painful Break

chapter 002 - The Trader Joe’s Debacle ✩

chapter 003 - Date With An Old Flame

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#🧞‍♀️#attack on titan #jean krischtein #jean kirschtein imagine #modern!au #modern aot #attack on titan pieck #pieck finger x reader #attack on titan smut #jean kirschtein angst #jean kirschtein smut

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bloompompom · 5 months

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A Little Joy

✽ summary: your pregnancy comes as a surprise, but the even bigger surprise comes when you tell your husband on christmas, twelve days later. ✽ content: ~6.4k word count. husband!eren jaeger x fem!reader. modern au, established relationship, reader celebrates christmas, mentions of jean x pieck, light angst, some fertility struggles, pregnancy, morning sickness/emetophobia warning, super soft domestic fluff, smut with big feelings, showering together, slight overstimulation, alcohol, explicit language, explicit sexual content. reader discretion advised. 18+

You found out you were pregnant on a Friday afternoon. You were home alone after finally drumming up the courage to drive to the convenience store. You grabbed a bottle of ginger ale, some crackers, then paced down the personal care aisle at least four times, as any normal, rational person would.

You weren’t exactly trying to get pregnant, but you certainly weren’t preventing it either. Or if you were, you and Eren were doing a shit job at it, if it wasn’t obvious enough already. It was an unspoken agreement between you—‘if it happens, it happens.’ And if it didn’t happen, well, it didn’t matter because you weren’t really trying; no reason to get your hopes up.

When you woke up before sunrise on Thursday morning, it wasn’t because you felt particularly bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. You were whatever the opposite was—bleary-eyed and droopy-tailed, like one of those dogs in those terribly sad commercials. You lay in bed on your back, hands folded over your stomach, right under your ribs, and told yourself that you didn’t have to vomit. You don’t have to throw up, you definitely don’t have to—

Then you launched out of bed, skittered to the bathroom, and did exactly that. You flushed the toilet, brushed your teeth, and wrote it off as nothing more than a fluke.

When Friday morning rolled around and the process repeated itself, it was no longer a mere fluke. Only then did the thought cross your mind, right as you finished dry heaving into the toilet bowl: it’s happened. Finally.

You stayed quiet about it, slipping back into bed like you had never left. Not getting your hopes up, remember?

You chugged the ginger ale on the drive home, which didn’t help your nausea but ensured you had to pee. You tore open the cardboard box, skimmed over the instructions—you knew the drill, you’ve had scares before—and you followed every step. When the first test came back positive, you had more water, waited it out, then took another. Again, two pink lines, bold pink lines stared back at you. Then you grabbed the second box you purchased, a digital test, and prepared to take that one, too. The conclusion was the same; the third time was the charm for you to finally believe you were pregnant.

You did some quick mental math. If it was Friday, then Christmas Day was twelve days away. Eleven sleeps ‘til Christmas, you thought, like a kid giddily awaiting Santa’s arrival. Could you hold out until Christmas morning? Could you keep quite possibly the biggest secret of all time from your husband for twelve whole days?

It’d be the best present, wouldn’t it? Better than anything money could buy—better than anything you had already bought and wrapped for him. Yes, it was true you weren’t trying to get pregnant, but maybe you had been asking yourself, ‘Is this the month my period would come late?’ only for it to arrive perfectly on time. Again. Maybe you were gushing over cute babies more often and staring at little families at the grocery store for too long—or too longingly. You’d stopped worrying about birth control around a year ago, and he’d stopped bothering to pull out not long after that. So maybe there was a part of you—of both of you, because you could see it on Eren’s face, too—that wondered when, if ever, it would be your turn.

That was why you ultimately decided to keep it a secret. You had to. You wanted to gift him the reason to lose that wistful face he got whenever you’d point out another teensy pair of stupidly adorable baby shoes. The face you would catch every now and again, like that time you helped clean out his parents’ attic.

It was warm at first, nothing but smiles and feel-good memories as the two of you rifled through box after box, deciding what you should take home and what should get donated. Old family photos, forgotten action figures. All the picture books his five-year-old self cherished.

Eren took a few of his favorites home with him, tucked under his arm as you said goodbye to his mother. She was quick to point them out, smiling as she made sure he had Corduroy with him, leaning into you to explain that it used to be his favorite. He said he couldn’t find it, that book you didn’t even know he was searching for.

No, it wasn’t the missing book that had him bothered. You had almost made it out of the house with your fuzzy feelings still alive and intact, his hand almost on the doorknob when she made the comment every parent seemed to love:

‘Does this mean I can expect my first grandchild soon?’

‘We’ll see.’ ‘Who knows?’ ‘Not yet.’ You couldn’t remember what Eren told her, but what you did remember was the look on his face. On that car ride home, you still didn’t talk about it. You didn’t talk about it because you weren’t trying to get pregnant. And if you weren’t trying, then you had no hope to lose in the first place.

Now, you could only imagine the new look on his face—probably an ear-to-ear smile in excitement for your future, your family, and for the longest nine months of your lives as you waited to meet your little one.

He would be so surprised, too. He would never expect you to be able to keep a secret with your big mouth, as he liked to say. It was perfect.

The only thing left to do now was figure out how to present it to him, because twelve-day-old pee sticks sitting lonely in a box would be a pretty sorry sight.

Christmas was ten days away when you realized this was harder than you thought it would be. Not only the secret keeping but finding a creative way to surprise Eren. You had scrolled through countless forums, scoured through every cheesy dad-to-be gift that existed, but nothing felt right.

You had never considered how you would give the announcement before, and never did you think to make a big show of it. You always thought it would be as simple as outrightly saying the words—or even less than that, just running out of the bathroom with the positive test in hand. And you certainly never imagined you would keep it to yourself for longer than a few hours, let alone twelve days.

You decided to call your best friend for ideas. You debated if it was fair to tell her before the father of your child, but you wouldn’t do it without good reason, and this was as good a reason as ever. And technically speaking, you had known her longer, since high school. You were sure that buried somewhere in your friendship pacts was a promise to tell each other first. That was your justification.

You tried to sneak beneath her best friend radar with a coy, “If you were going to reveal a huge secret to Jean on Christmas, how would you go about it?” But who were you kidding? She immediately saw through you.

“Oh my god. You’re pregnant, aren’t you?”

You fell to your bed with a flop. Not in defeat but in that dreamy, cloud-nine way. Finally, someone knew. You could hear your smile spilling into your voice even as you warned her, “Please don’t tell Jean.”

Jean was her husband. More than that, he was one of Eren’s good friends. The two of you actually met each other through the happy couple, way back when. Best friends dating (and now married to) best friends. It went without saying that if Jean found out, then you might as well have told Eren yourself.

“I won’t, I won’t,” she assured. But she didn’t offer any more than her word because she, too, was clueless on pregnancy announcements.

Eight days until Christmas. You didn’t want to jinx it, but so far, your only symptom had been waves of nausea. You supposed you felt a bit sleepier than normal, only if you really thought about it.

You believed you had done a good job at pretending nothing was off, but your husband must know you better than that. Either that, or you were just that horrible of an actor.

That morning, you met Eren in the kitchen, greeting him with a big yawn—yeah, definitely more tired than usual. Pot in hand, he offered you some coffee, but the fresh-brewed scent you once loved now made your stomach churn.

You swallowed hard, said a short, “No, thank you,” and opted for toast, just toast, instead.

He gave you this skeptical look. Something must be wrong if you weren’t in the mood for coffee. You were half-tempted to drink it anyway, but then he approached you, slipping his hand around the nape of your neck. He drew you into him, placing a prolonged peck on your forehead like he always did when you were sick—his preferred way to check your temperature. You imagined he’d do the same with your child, too.

You didn’t feel feverish to him. He tossed you one of his usual quips—“Who are you, and what have you done with my wife?”—but after you stammered something about dinner not sitting well, he brushed it off just as thoughtlessly as you had at first.

Crisis averted, for now.

Three days out, and you had started to think you might burst. The excitement that stirred in you had only intensified, your nausea now a fifty-fifty split of morning sickness and anticipation. It was to an embarrassing degree, too, like a child let in on a secret, walking around with puffed cheeks as if they’d erupt at any moment.

Not really, but that was what it felt like, only because you had finally thought up the perfect way to tell him.

Since that afternoon spent cleaning the attic was fresh on your mind, you thought to find those childhood books of his. You went searching in a few closets but discovered them sitting lonely in the corner of your spare room—storage room. It was a glorified closet by now, its only purpose was to hide forgotten items and eye sores. Everything, the books included, had collected dust. You’d have to get to cleaning and organizing it in the coming months.

You picked up one of the books, blew the dust off, smearing away the rest with your hand, and flipped through the pages. It was a walk down memory lane as you poked through a couple more books, the ones you remembered from your childhood. Then you thought of Eren—little Eren. Of footie pajamas and cheeks smushed in his hands, leaned into his mother with interest. Not exactly curled up in bed; it was more likely he was rolling around like the fussy thing he supposedly was.

You thought of him, years from now, sat on the edge of the bed—you could already imagine where you’d have it. Your toddler curled up beneath the blankets as Eren read to them. Or, if they would turn out anything like him, they’d be crawling atop him as he could only try to read. You couldn’t wait to learn which they’d be, who they’d be, and all the little joys of parenthood. It’ll look good on him.

That was when it came to you, your light bulb moment. The missing book: Corduroy. It was something special enough, specific enough, that only he’d know the meaning, because he was a sap like that. That was how you’d tell him. Why hadn’t you thought of it sooner?

Considering it was a long-time beloved book, it would be as easy as waltzing to the children’s section of any old bookstore. It would probably be front and center, too.

So that was what you did, and it only took thirty minutes roundtrip. You wrapped it with what leftover paper you could spare, stuck a pretty gold bow on top, and placed it underneath the Christmas tree with the other gifts you’d bought him, now paling in comparison.

Eren was packing the last of the gifts into the car when you snatched one, the important one, from what remained of the pile. You thought you were sly enough, that you had waited until his back was turned, but he caught you as you went to hoard it away.

He stopped, arms full of tinselly boxes, stacked high enough that he kept them steady with his chin rested atop, and curiously asked, “Not bringing that one?”

Over the years, it became a tradition to spend the day at his parents’ house, and somewhere between your late breakfast and four o’clock dinner, you’d open presents together, save the few and not-so-far-between indecent ones his extended family didn’t need to see. Which would explain the knowing eyes he was giving you now; why he didn’t question your quick, ‘It’s for later,’ before you left to hide it in your bedroom closet.

The morning was dipped in molasses. Every hour dribbled on by, every minute tacky and stuck to the next, until you were wading around in the liminal afternoon hours. You weren’t alone in the feeling, though. For as much as you suppressed your restlessness—laughing on cue though your mind might as well have been on another planet, declining a mimosa for the third time and still sounding just as polite as the first—Eren wore his plainly; sat on the edge of his seat but not in the I can’t wait to get the hell away from my family sort of way you would expect.

The impatience was there, yes, but not in the dreadful sense of the word; it was more sanguine than that. An anticipation to return home and settle in for the night, or for the gift awaiting him.

Or, more simply put, an impatience for you. Just you. Perceptible in his touch alone, beneath his touch, when he’d sneak up from behind and pull you into a hug. His hold was desirous—not sensual and needy but innocent, like some innate urge to keep you close. Every kiss pressed into your temple was tinged with benevolence. His palms, weighty with warm devotion, melted you as they curved over your hips and around your stomach.

You could blame it on the holiday spirit, how it tended to coax out such gooey, lovesome feelings. Mix that with the glass of wine he had and it would make perfect sense as to why your love language is physical touch husband was lovey dovey with you. But he had that glass well over an hour ago, and you couldn’t help but wonder if somewhere deep inside, like in his subconscious or id or whatever it was, he knew. Whether he was aware of it or not, some part of him had to know. It radiated from his hands, secure and protective as they always found their way back to you, resting on your thigh beneath the dining table or against the dip in your back as he slid past you in the kitchen. He couldn’t get enough—couldn’t have you close enough.

You assumed that to be the reason you left shortly after dinner, ‘regretfully’ having to skip out on board games tonight, as Eren put it, his hand snuggly at your back with his thumb making small circles you felt through your sweater.

It was dark when you stepped outside, enough that you would have thought it was midnight if you didn’t know better. It had started snowing, with chunky flakes that pitter-pattered against the ground instead of swirling through the air. It stuck, though, and by the time you arrived home, there was a powdered sugar coating across the lawn, shimmering in the streetlight.

You rambled on about your forgotten leftovers as you slipped from your boots. Eren’s hands came to your shoulders, helping you out of your coat sleeves. He hung it in the closet, listening to you recall the pan you had left behind, too. And while you ruffled his hair, picking the fat snowflakes off the top of his head, he assured you he’d grab the pan the next time he visited.

He held you in his arms, your rightful spot for the day, and felt you shiver between his hands.

“Cold?” Eren asked.

You nodded but immediately wished you could retract it. A grin spanned his face as he took it as the go-ahead to slip his hands beneath your sweater, his fingers like icicles against your back. You only responded with a sharp yelp, snatching his wrists and breaking free from his grasp.

After he stopped laughing, Eren made it up to you by running a hot shower, one you could share together. With your clothes reduced to a puddle on the bathroom tile, your December-frozen skin tingled beneath the stream of water. Your neck curled at the sensation, how it traveled to your toes the same way the steaming water trickled down the curve in your back. You rolled your shoulders and unwound from the day, watching as it washed down the drain.

All day, you only focused on what was to come, your mind racing and reeling until the moment you could be alone together—this moment. About as private as it gets. As ephemeral as it would take for the water to run cold. Short-lived and spurred by a collective sigh.

You always enjoyed showering together. Not shower sex, just showering. Not its most benign definition, but more innocent than the innuendo it carried. Though you would argue it was just as intimate, perhaps more. For what was more visceral than confessing you couldn’t stand to be apart, even for the minutes the mundane task would take, so why not do it together?

After all, it was easier that way, wasn’t it? More efficient? Not so much. But you didn’t crave efficiency, you craved him, his embrace, the feeling of skin on slippery skin.

The same hands that smeared away droplets from your face traversed down the expanse of Eren’s back, every divot and every groove of it. You slid them around his torso, his arms raised as he lathered shampoo into his hair. You flattened your palms to his chest, held him close enough that your cheek was smushed against his back.

Your eyes crinkled shut before soap dared to drip into your eye. You spat the acrid taste of it from your mouth, only for a chorus of laughter to follow, his inciting your own. Your dilemma worsened. Enough for him to help you rinse off—for you to be sure he tasted it on your tongue as you swapped kisses back and forth, stolen between splatters.

You’d been clean for some time now, the water was lukewarm, but you remained, content with his hands rubbing your shoulders, his lips intermittently seeking yours, as dutiful as they were doting, leaving you moaning ever so frailly into his mouth; little whiffs of respite as he kneaded out the tight muscles. Your head tipped to the side with this sleepy bend just for him to catch your chin and bring you back to him, your head foggier than the humid bathroom.

You were only towel-dried when Eren reminded you of the gift, probably thinking you’d forgotten about it.

Of course, you hadn’t.

You found him in the bedroom, him wearing only a pair of plaid pajama pants, his chest slightly sheened from the shower, and you in just a fluffy towel, pinned beneath your arm. You asked him to wait while you put on a set of pajamas and fetched the gift. But before that, you lit the candle at your bedside, just to really set the mood.

“No peeking!” you called out before disappearing into the closet.

You were giddy to know that, like you, this had been on his mind all day—for different reasons, but that only made the surprise better.

You returned to find him sitting on your bed with his eyes on you, undeniably stealing a peek.

“I said no peeking!” You hid the present behind your back.

“It’s wrapped!” He didn’t take your scold seriously until you pulled a face. Then he closed his eyes. “I already saw it earlier, remember?”

You ignored it, pleasedly telling him, “Hold out your hands.”

He did, and you set the gift into them, prompting him to take a look.

Eren inspected it briefly, then ripped the gilded paper at the corner. The cover poked through, not enough for him to recognize it but enough to fit a finger beneath and widen the tear.

Once the paper was crumpled on the floor, he chuckled lightly. He angled it around in his hand, looking over the cover that was glossier, newer, than the one he remembered.

It was a sweet gift. He appreciated the thought that went into it. How you learned it was missing and clung onto that tiny detail for months for this moment—a trait he loved about you.

“It’s perfect,” he started to say. “It’ll complete the collection for—”

Like it was recorded in slow motion, you watched very second the realization took him by the shoulders and shook him. There was a drop in his expression as he cautiously asked, “Wait. Does this mean…”

Where he left off, you picked up, nodding eagerly as you said, “I’m pregnant. We’re having a baby.”

You didn’t know what happened first, whether you had ended your sentence or if your squeal had cut it short as Eren scooped you into his arms. Your feet left the ground as he spun you around in the biggest bear hug you could imagine, this effervescent feeling bubbling from your stomach and escaping you in a fit of giggles.

He plopped back onto the bed and took you down with him, the mattress bobbing beneath your shared weight. You were still in his arms, legs draped over his lap, as he scattered kisses across your face, wherever he could. Even missing a few, with some at your neck and ear.

You took his face between your hands and kissed him straight on the lips, quick. His smile smushed his cheeks in your hands as he asked, “This is for real?” You nodded again, kissed him again. “This is happening?”

“We’re gonna be parents,” you affirmed, letting the reality of it finally sink in.

You traded kisses. Ones that had your fingers knotting in his shirt and his hand venturing to back of your head, keeping each kiss longer than the last until you were making out. You didn’t know when that happened. Somewhere along the way, between roaming hands and sweeping tongues, your touches turned fervorous. You were both so happy and kissing and oblivious to everything but how deeply you needed each other, like it might actually ache if you were to separate.

And while he couldn’t go another second without having you, evident in the way his lips sought out your weak spot on your neck, he laid you on the bed more thoughtfully than he ever had before. The old mattress didn’t trill beneath you; you weren’t splayed against the bed, toppled over, and taken right then but coddled and caressed. You found it endearing, how careful he was, as if right before his eyes, you had suddenly become something that he could easily break. So endearing that you couldn’t help but let out a soft giggle as your head sank back into the pillows.

Eren propped himself above you, face-to-face, both of you smiley. You were enveloped by him wholly, with his palms planted at either of your sides. You tucked his hair behind his ears to get a better look at his face, still a bit giggly.

“You know how this works, right?” you chaffed, not above some good-natured teasing. “I’m already pregnant.”

He shushed you, closing the gap between you until his grin was pressed against your own. Until you not only heard his laughter but felt it reverberate against yours and tasted their unity on your tongue.

His lips veered to the corner of your mouth. He kissed you there, trailing more down the side of your face. His nose nestled behind your ear, tickling you as he kissed beneath your jawbone, right where you felt the thud-thudding of your pulse against his lips.

His hand caressed the length of your body, smoothing down your hip and grasping the fat of it before sneaking beneath your tank top on his way back up. It tore a faint groan from you, from the very back of your throat.

Those light, airy kisses began to linger. Not lips merely pressed to your skin like a stamp but soft slips of his mouth, his tongue, until he reached the notch between your collarbones.

He tugged the neckline of your top down, exposing your tits and taking the peak of one into his mouth, all in a single, easy motion. He didn’t neglect the other; his hand was gentle as he massaged and explored the swell of your breast, pinching your nipple between his middle and index fingers and rolling until it was perked for him. His tongue, stroking and flicking and licking, had your other in the same state.

It left you breathless, your mouth dumbly agape, parted by gasps. Your vision had gone glossy to everything but Eren, your senses dulled to anything that wasn’t his mouth ravening your tits, his tongue licking the valley separating them, his lips pursed and sucking your nipples until they glistened with his spit.

You perched high on your elbows. Your tanktop pooled at your midriff, its loose straps dangling around your biceps, pathetic and practically begging Eren to strip you of it. And when he did, it looked just as useless on the other side of the bed as it did on you.

You slumped back into the mattress only for your hips to go next, elevated and encouraging his fingers, hooked around both your silken sleep shorts and underwear, to take them off, too. You delighted in it, how your bare body melded with the blanket. You brushed a hand along it, felt your skin glide against it. It was downy and fluffy and tickling you, everywhere.

He wrestled out of the pajamas he’d just put on and sat back on his calves. The sinewy muscles of his chest went taut, his arms raised as he fingered through his hair. He collected it in his fist, then tied it off at the back of his head, getting it out of his way. It was messy; he was unfocused, more attuned to you, his wife, happy and giggly and naked below him. His eyes trailed from the crown of your head to between the legs he split and wedged himself between.

“Beautiful,” he said, not with a lilt but spoken like fact—not to you or him, but like he wanted the cosmos to know it. “You’re fucking beautiful.”

He snaked a hand under your back, lifting you as he leaned in to meet you halfway. You felt him stiffly pressed against your leg first, then his mouth at your chest. He peppered your sternum with kisses. Between them, he told you, “You’re gonna be the hottest mom.”

He laughed first, anticipating your reaction—more once it actually happened, the cute gasp you gave with his name on your inhale. His breath tickled over your delicate skin, and you playfully tried to pry yourself from him. He only held you closer, pulling more giggles from you as he kissed and kissed his way down until his lighthearted lips were laden with hunger, his tongue laving down to your navel in reverence. Then lower on your stomach. He left a few extra kisses there.

Before Eren went any lower, he freed himself from his boxers.

His hands took hold of your inner thighs, sculpted the plush of them around his fingers. He pushed back on them and settled in the space he made between. He brought his thumb to you, pressed it against your clit, and that was all it took. No flicking, no rubbing, it was that alone that had your lower back tightening, the arch of it lifting from the bed.

He hummed a short laugh, satisfied with his work. He was closer to you now. So close that you felt his lips graze your entrance, his hot breath surging through your body as if it could quell every one of your chills, as if he wasn’t the cause of them.

Your hand flung to the pillow, twisting the pillowcase between your fingers in frissons of anticipation, gripping harder when you felt the smooth lick he gave the crease where your leg met your body. He kissed you there, too. He kissed you everywhere he could manage, again and again, except for the spot you wanted—needed him most.

All the while, you could only stare down at him, big-eyed, with kiss-swollen lips sucked between your teeth. You tried to stay still for him, but your hips were unruly. They helplessly wiggled, enjoying his attention but desperate for more of it.

His mouth finally closed over your heat, making your knees buckle and collapse to the bed. Your inhale was sibilant, shaky but the sweetest sound, like a choppy thank you until your voice cut out.

Eren had you languidly, with his face lying comfortably against your thigh. He licked you like he found just as much indulgence in it as you. He lazily spread you with two fingers, even taking a full second to admire you, pretty and puffy and pleading with him—only a second though. That was all he could last before his mouth practically watered for you, raring to taste you again.

Exposed, like this, every swipe of his tongue was like he was licking electricity up your spine, every bolt stronger than the last. Your body flexed as you teetered the line between too much and don’t you dare stop. Somewhere between shying away in reflex and hoping he’d yank you back down to his mouth.

And he would. With arms locked around your thighs, he lifted his head and angled it perfectly, granting him the opportunity to dart his tongue inside you, fucking you with it when he wasn’t encircling your clit.

There was a ravenous side to his tenderness; adoration hidden behind the hunger. The two contrasted only to come together, meeting in the center and knotting themselves tight, tighter. Until it—until you—snapped. You came with a stretch of your back, with white-hot stars flashing behind your eyelids.

Eren’s thumb drew little circles against your thigh soothingly, yet his mouth didn’t leave you, his tongue still slotted inside your heat. He groaned, besotted by the taste of you coming on his tongue, how he could feel every flutter of your pussy on your comedown. He greedily wanted more of you, all of you, and all to himself.

You didn’t know how long you’d been there, just like that. It was easy to lose your sense of time, if you even had it in the first place, what with the way the bedroom hadn’t stopped swimming around you. The bedroom curtains were drawn over the windows, thick enough to keep out the streetlights. The only source of light came from the quick flicker of the candle, its glow rippling across the wall.

Your legs hung limply over his shoulders now. One of your hands had buried itself in his hair while he held the other, your fingers intertwined. His tongue swirled around your clit, as ardent now as it was for your first orgasm.

Eren knew your body by now. He knew it well enough to understand what a squeeze of your hand meant, how you’d pet through his hair reassuringly—a silent ‘keep doing that’ when you didn’t have the breath to speak it aloud. And he’d keep doing that until he knew you had finished.

He’d brought you to three moony orgasms—the drawn-out kind, like you had wandered into a dream—and he was actively working on your fourth.

It was comparable to the slow build of a roller coaster: that foreboding tick tick tick pace, the gentle pressure of his flattened tongue, licking you with broad stripes until you were at your peak. You’d hang there for a second, abloom and upcaught in the delicious current that was just shy of becoming entirely undone. You’d careen the tippy top and wonder when you’d finally plummet.

You would only come once he decided, and after deciding you had been patiently buzzing long enough, he started to lick you faster.

You could barely tell him you were coming because it ripped through you then, sparking low in your pelvis. Your tiny chants of ‘fuck’ melted into one long, sheet-gripping moan as the feeling shot higher, like it was caught in your throat.

Right then, as you were blissfully crashing for him, Eren pushed himself to his hands and took his rightful place on top of you. He replaced his tongue with his cock, pushing inside you to the hilt with an effortless thrust.

Your bodies came together and stayed just like that as the feeling racked through you, both of you, like you shared an electrical current. It lasted a century but only existed for a wink, a whole-body tremble as you suddenly, finally, felt full. Every throb of your orgasm was a tantalizing threat, forcing him to hesitate lest he risked finishing before he’d even started. You wore his expression, and his yours: a subtle drop of the jaw in relief, the very corners of the mouth curled in ecstasy.

Then he began to steadily move his hips, firmly but not fiercely fucking you through your orgasm.

You were sensitive. Every fiber of you was frayed at the edge and rekindled. The luxurious flame erupted higher in your stomach, burning from the crests of your cheeks to your toes, then back up again. The snapping of his hips was punctuated by you bouncing against him, another gasping moan tumbling past your lips. You smothered them, with arms tossed around his neck and your lips devouring his. They became nothing but wet whimpering sounds for him to swallow.

Against your mouth, he mumbled, “You make the prettiest sounds when you come,” and you tasted every syllable.

You felt everything. You flipped through emotions like one flipped through a book or shuffled a deck of cards, one right after the other.

You felt fizzy, the same lightness that comes with a huff of helium, like you could drift away. You felt his leg against yours, how it made every hair on your body stand on end.

You felt safe, bound and anchored by his weight pinning you into the mattress; your nose bumping against his, your fingers tangled in his hair.

You had plunged into one another. Found the deepest parts of each other and weaved yourselves into one, belonging together irrevocably. You felt wanted, and you found yourself wanting. You wanted him so close that it’d be impossible to discern where you ended and he began, as if you weren’t already fit together perfectly with him inside you.

The wanting was mutual. Right now, Eren wanted to offer you everything, to give with a generosity he couldn’t explain. His mind, his body, his heart—even deeper, his soul, if souls even existed; he wasn’t here to argue that. Every gentle caress and every harsh kiss was like the push and pull of the tides, to and fro until they crashed down in a rapturous wave. And like the moon, he could look down and know he was the one to coax it out of you.

That was all he wanted right then. That, and his wanting for your future just past the horizon, spent together with a family of your own.

Flushed from fucking, with sweat rolling down between his shoulders, he cradled the back of your head, tilting it to nip at the lobe of your ear.

“You. This.” His cadence was tense and brilliant, calm while you were in a tempestuous storm. “This is everything I’ve always wanted.”

The words swathed you like a wool blanket, squeezing your chest until you thought it might explode. You were already too full for such feelings—your heart brimmed with them, your own proclamations thick in your throat, his cock still buried inside you.

The world was dreamlike as Eren tipped your chin again to look at him. His pupils were blown, irises darkened sans a thin ring of green. You didn’t speak but what you told him was loud.

I love you, I love you, I love you.

It emanated from your eyes; words unspoken were signed and sealed with kisses along his shoulders and up the column of his throat.

He came then with a shudder, with a gruff groan that was warm on the ears and his hips slammed into yours one last time.

He collapsed to his forearms with his heart thumping hard and his chest heaving against yours. You noticed the faint quiver in his biceps, counted his breaths. After the fourth he pulled out of you, his fifth breath sharp through his nose. You felt the wet heat of his cock against your stomach, felt the aftermath—the lewd combination of the two of you—drip from you. He rolled to your side, and you laid there, sticky sheets and all, like lovers do, not parting immediately but bathing in the afterglow.

You were still basking in it, practically sweltering now, when Eren opened his arms for you, ticking his head for you to come his way with a murmur of, “Come here, love.” An invitation you wouldn’t dare deny.

Cloaked beneath his arm, you felt his hand take your chin. He guided your faces together and kissed your forehead.

Just to have you there with him, his cheek rested upon your head, your breath warming his chest; to have you to fall asleep next to, every night, your body puzzle-pieced with his—all of that was enough for him.

And as Eren slipped his arm around your waist, just before he drifted to sleep with his hand over your belly, he couldn’t help but smile. You were so clueless as to how much you meant to him, how much you’d given him. The greatest of all was yet to come, and they would be with you this time next year.

thank you for reading ♡

#eren x reader #eren jaeger x reader #eren yeager x reader #eren smut #eren fluff #dividers by @/saradika

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mossgh0st · 12 days

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As If It’s Heaven’s Gate (Levi Ackerman x Reader)

Summary | Levi is caught in a dark place following the battle of heaven and earth. Believing he’s undeserving of life’s sweetness, he deprives himself until you show up on his doorstep. Inspired by and based on Too Sweet by Hozier.

Content | Angst, Fluff. Sort of slow burn? No use of y/n. Levi is a grump, reader is shorter than him. Brief mentions of off-screen sex. Italics are song lyrics that each section is inspired by.

Pairings | Levi/Reader. Mentions of Jean/Pieck.

Notes | As soon as I heard Too Sweet, I knew I needed to write about Levi. Header is from ‘kii on Pinterest. Hope you enjoy!

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It can’t be said I’m an early bird, it’s 10 o’clock before I say a word. Baby, I can never tell, how do you sleep so well?

After the war, Levi becomes a creature of the night. His meticulous bedtime routine and eves of deep, restful slumber have become wrought with nightmares, teeming with the faces of everyone he’s ever loved having succumbed to their bitter ends. He’s forgone the tea, a relic of a previous era; he now prefers an amber liquid that stings on the way down. A balm that numbs, heavy bottomed glass filled only a quarter of the way. When he ventures beyond the confines of his home, he asks for the tippy top of the top shelf - Levi always takes his whiskey neat.

You know you don’t gotta pretend. Baby, now and then, don’t you just wanna wake up, dark as a lake, smelling like a bonfire, lost in a haze?

Some days, he’s lucky if he retires before the sunrise peeks over the hills and pulls itself up to the high point of the sky. Letters go unanswered, bookshelves less sparse as he fills the majority of his time with thick, leather-bound tomes. The newspaper has becomes the perfect kindling, headlines boasting peace negotiations melt and turn runny with the heat of the blaze. When Levi wakes each hazy afternoon, it’s with the lingering scent of bonfire strung about the atmosphere. His once grey eyes have turned deep, a color so sharpened it resembles the water on a lake just before the claps of thunder rumble and bring down swells of rain.

But while in this world, I think I’ll take my whiskey neat. My coffee black and my bed at three.

He knows he won’t live forever. He’s not at all interested. At this point, he’s pleading for the same sweet release from the world he afforded Erwin. Levi has spent so much time dwelling in the night, the darkness is threatening to become him. Then, you show up, one damp afternoon. Modest sundress, two small bags, a green ribbon tying back your hair. The glow you emanate is too much for him. He wants to be angry, filled with a rage so intense it convinces you to leave running in the midst of the spring storm, ribbon flying behind you. The pit in his stomach solidifies when he can’t bring himself to be irate, softened by the cold flush of your cheeks and the sheepishness of your smile as you stand, delicate in his doorway.

You’re too sweet for me, you’re too sweet for me.

At first, your presence does nothing to alter his routine. You rise with the sun, the first blinks of morning are spent brewing a sweet coffee in his kitchen, silent save the chattering of the birds. The dregs of his previous evening’s fire catching in the wind and mingling with the scent of bitter coffee grounds. Levi rises long after the sun has hit it’s peak, emerging in loose slacks and a half undone shirt, the sleeves rolled. You cross paths only briefly, while he pours his glass of amber whiskey and you prepare your cup of evening tea. A silent understanding has occurred - you can stay, if you don’t intervene. So you read in the overgrown garden, take your coffee with milk and two sugars, visit the bookstore, the seamstress down the block from the town’s main square, and worry about him only when you are tipping over the ledge into sleep.

But who wants to live forever, babe? You treat your mouth as if it's Heaven's gate.

The first change is subtle: tea leaves are disappearing faster than you’re brewing them; you know he’s dipping into the store after you retire each evening. Then, when the usual night terrors creep up again, plaguing your mind and leaving your lungs in a vice grip, the second change occurs. Levi waking and comforting you after a string of particularly violent dreams, a different sort of understanding passes when he murmurs, “I still see them, too.” You find him in your bed then, most mornings. Your routines still separate, bodies occupying different halves of the day for weeks. Coffee, bookstore, seamstress, reading, garden. It continues on, life in your solitary bubbles, except the brief overlapping in the early morning when your breaths mingle in the same space between your sleeping forms.

I wish that I could go along, babe, don't get me wrong.

The paradigm shifts once more when he begins to rouse the same time as you. A brief wave of shame washes over you as you realize he’s already awake, you cannot observe his closed eyes and smoothed forehead, the lines of his face set in peace, the soft parting of his lips, or the slow rise of his chest beneath the thin blankets. That morning, you show him how to make the coffee, and he grumbles after burning the first pot, squinting in the bright light. He notices you smiling out of the corner of his eye and something rattles around in his chest. You add three sugars to your cup. He accompanies you to both the bookstore and the seamstress, his silent presence a new comfort. Levi wants to ask why you chose him, chose his home, when there are happier and more accommodating friends, current or former members of the 104th. There’s no doubt in his mind that you’d be better off with someone like Mikasa, in her quiet cottage by the sea. Even Jean and Pieck, or hell, Reiner and his family.

You're bright as the morning, as soft as the rain.

Within a few months, Levi’s world has changed. It’s brighter, fuzzy around the edges. There’s a few sundresses in the closet of his room, a growing stack of books on his dresser. A knit shawl is draped over the chair in the living room; and the guest bed hasn’t been used in several weeks. He lets her brew the coffee in the morning, his palate now well suited for the taste, and takes chrysanthemum tea in the evenings. The garden has a bench now, front row to the beds of geranium, lavender, and snapdragon. When you smile at him through the kitchen window, an understanding dawns on him, an awakening blooms inside of him. He’s seen this look before, many times; over a shared water jug during an expedition, sleepy and exhausted over a fire surrounded by their comrades, during meetings with military leadership, after the battle of heaven and earth, and on the day you were assigned to his squad. You would never go to Mikasa’s, or to Jean and Pieck, even Reiner, or anyone else. He would never let you.

Pretty as a vine, as sweet as a grape.

The first touch of morning is chill, a breeze dancing its way through the open window, sheet gathered at his waist as Levi rouses from sleep. He hears your hums from the kitchen and swings his feet over the bed. He’s drawn to you like bees are to flowers, cloying aroma and sunlight and all things good. Forgoing the tie of his robe, he begins purposeful strides down the hall. Then, you’re there, back turned and hair down. The hem of your pale nightgown sways as you wait for the pour of coffee, glowing in the sunrise, hands over your upper arms to stave off the late summer air. You’re lost in a daydream. Levi comes to stand behind you, listening to the melody you hum quietly. The deprecating, nagging voice he contends with daily in his mind is quieted - it’s just you now; always you.

If you could sit in a barrel, maybe I’d wait.

It’s quiet when he slides an arm around your waist, body warm and flushed. It’s quiet when you turn in his hold, meeting his grey gaze with lingering surprise and pink cheeks. It’s quiet as he pulls you in closer still, hands coming up to rest on his chest. Quiet, as Levi brushes his forehead against yours, eyes closed, fingers flexing in their hold of you. Completely silent, as he tilts your chin up, up, up, and brushes his lips with yours. The taste of you nothing like he had ever dreamed, and oh, had he dreamed. When you push up onto your toes to deepen the pressure, sigh into his mouth, his black bitter heart nearly bursts through his chest.

Until that day…

And when he takes you shortly after, coffee long forgotten, limbs so tangled it’s near impossible to discern where you end and Levi begins, lips parted and dewy with sweat and each other; he can only think of the sweetness this life has afforded him in you, how the bitterness of his past has made way for this belonging.. well. There’s truly no such thing as too sweet, is there?

#levi aot #captain levi #levi heichou #levi x reader #levi attack on titan #levi x you #levi ackerman #levi x y/n #levi fanfiction #levi blurb #levi oneshot #levi ackerman fanfiction #levi Ackerman oneshot #aot oneshots #attack on titan oneshot #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x you #levi ackerman x y/n #user!moss writes

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ilyluffy · 1 year

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𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐤𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐢𝐧 + 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐭𝐬

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you love jean more than anything but you’re almost positive he only wants you for sex but maybe you’re wrong…

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: fwb!jean kirstein x afab!reader

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: smut {minors + ageless blogs dni!! you’ll be blocked}

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: soft dom!jean, college/modern au, fwb, assumed unrequited feelings, angst to fluff, praise, a lil bit of body worship, cunnilingus, cum eating, petnames “baby, princess, babydoll”, mentions of cumming untouched, breeding kink, implied vaginal sex/multiple orgasms

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.3k+

𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎 𝐅𝐄𝐄𝐋 𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂. not because you dared to have a friends with benefits relationship. no. it wasn’t even necessarily because you caught feelings for the person you were supposed to just be having casual sex with. what you found REALLY embarrassing was that you fell a guy you just so happened to be fucking who very clearly had feelings for someone else.

jean made no secret that the person he wanted to be with most was mikasa, another girl at your college. you never really understood it. of course mikasa was gorgeous but she never showed an interest in jean whatsoever. if anything she spent her time following eren jaeger around like a loyal puppy. although, given the position you were in now, you realized you were in no place to judge jean.

emotions were unpredictable and often time’s uncontrollable. that was a lesson you learned that hard way after you and jean made your arrangement. you were already friends so why not do the other a favour and be each other's booty call. it wasn’t gonna be anything serious but the longer it went on the more it became serious for you.

you loved him, you really did and it was driving you crazy. it was painful being the person jean settled with because he couldn’t have her. you weren’t sure what to do at this point. keep things going and be constantly reminded that he’ll never feel the same way? or tell him the truth and possibly lose jean completely.

“i don’t know why you don’t just talk to him,” your roommate pieck says as she relaxes on the end of your bed. you sat against your headboard, miserably staring up at the ceiling after you poured your heart out to her. she was the only one of your friends that ran in different circles from jean and it felt like she was the lone person in the world you could confide in.

you sigh, shaking your head at that thought. “this isn’t one of those situations where the worst thing he can say is no, pieck. i know for a fact that feelings aren’t mutual. the worst case scenario is that he freaks out and runs. i can’t lose him like tharp”.

pieck seems to understand where you’re coming from, nonetheless she pushes forth. “okay, you don’t have to be honest with him but either way you two can’t keep having sex. it’ll only get harder for you and it’s not fair that things stay one sided. you need to end it”.

she’s right and you know it. just as you open your mouth to say something else, your phone buzzes. right on cue you look down and see jean’s name pop up in your notifications. you feel pieck’s dark eyes linger on you as you pick up your cell to respond. “he’s asking me to come over” you confess, finger hovering over the send button after you typed out a reply.

pieck tries to reason with you, advising you to say no. that is the wise choice but you feel your heart ache as you consider that option. deep down you want to take any chance you can get to be close to jean. no matter how stupid it is, you can’t deny him. so despite your friend’s advice, you text jean back telling him you’ll be at his place soon.

“i’m only going over to tell him we can’t do this anymore. that’s it” you insist as you become hyper aware of pieck’s judgemental stare. you can tell by the expression on her face that she doesn’t believe you but at this point you don’t care what anyone else thinks. all that matters to you is jean. so you put on some better clothes, grab your keys, and rush out the door.

it’s almost humiliating how quickly you arrive at jean’s doorstep. what’s even worse is that jean doesn’t appear the least bit surprised by your speed. it’s like he’s immune to how desperate you are at this point. it makes you want to shrivel up and die when you walk into his apartment.

it’s obvious by the lack of noise that jean’s housemates sasha and connie aren’t around. he takes advantage of the privacy by latching his lips on to your neck once he closes the front door.

“fuck, eren really pissed me off today” he grumbles against your skin. “i really need to let out some frustration”.

his muscular arms wrap around you as jean nips at your shoulder. normally this would make you feel like you were on cloud nine. being held by him used to be enough but it’s that moment that you realized there’s no love behind the touch. this is sad and the moment that sinks in for you, a feeling of nausea washes over you.

pieck was correct, what the hell were you doing?! suddenly coming to your senses, you squirm out of jean’s embrace. “please stop. i can’t do this”. for the first time since you got here, jean’s shocked. the first thing out of his mouth is a question about if he did something wrong.

you’re at the lost for words. technically he hadn’t done anything wrong intentionally but without meaning to he’s been using you and you couldn’t pretend like that wasn’t a fact anymore. “i’m sorry. i know you were expecting one thing but i only really came over to tell you that this needs to stop here” you say, avoiding jean’s gaze. “i know this was supposed to be casual but i can’t settle for that anymore”.

jean blinks in disbelief a few times before speaking. “i uh… that’s totally fine. i don’t mind not fucking anymore but… there’s something else you’re not saying”.

damn it, you forgot that he could read you like a book. of course jean could tell that you were hiding something. you feel so ashamed with yourself for so many reasons that your eyes start to water. you’re still not looking in his direction but jean can still spot the tears.

you don’t fight him when his hand takes hold of your chin and guides your face toward him. “what’s going on? i care about you beyond sex you know. you can talk to me” he tells you softly. you’re silently begging him to stop talking like that. you don’t want any false hope.

“you’ll hate me if i tell you” your bottom lip trembles. you can tell that jean’s utterly confused but he remains firm. he doesn’t stop wiping away the droplets on your cheeks and his hazel eyes stay glued to your own. he wasn’t going to drop this so you just spit it out. “i want more than sex with you. i love you jean” you confess, with your voice wobbling. “but i can’t compete with her”.

your words hit him hard. it's apparent in how jean’s facial features shift. however, once the initial bewilderment fades away you witness some confusion return. “compete with who?”.

you nearly throw your hands in the air in frustration. why was he playing dumb?! you have to pull away from jean completely to turn your back to him. “mikasa…”.

it takes jean a moment to process your response but when he does he’s quick to reject this claim. “mikasa? come on, how stupid do you think i am? i gave up on trying to win over mikasa ages ago. we all know she’s obsessed with that bastard eren”.

you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel a sense of relief. although, that didn’t mean that you hadn’t made a mistake in opening your big mouth. even if jean was claiming mikasa was out of the picture, that didn’t mean this was going anywhere.

sighing, you open your mouth to say something but you tense up when you feel jean’s chest against your back. out of nowhere he was so close. you can’t stop yourself from shivering when you feel his breath fan against the back of your neck. “besides, there’s someone i like a lot more. you wanna ask me who it is?”.

your throat feels dry for a few seconds but you somehow manage to choke out a “w-who?”.

jean chuckles softly, hugging you for a second time. this time around you let him, melting into his touch. “that would be you, baby. i’m crazy about you”.

almost immediately your heart starts hammering in your chest. you would have been worried about jean hearing it but you could feel his own heart pounding as he clings to you like you’re the most precious thing in the world. none of this feels real. you’re still wearing an unsure expression when you crane you neck to look back at jean. “really?”.

you’re met with a smile as jean gives you a nod. “yeah. do you mind if i prove it to you?”.

you hesitate for a moment but soon enough you agree. jean doesn’t waste a second. leading you to his bedroom, he guides you down on the bed gently. he’s never really been too rough with you but you swear this is the first instance where he’s treated you like glass. each of his touches were careful as he eventually leaned down to press his lips against yours.

the sensual kiss lasts until you’re begging for air. when jean releases your lips, he makes his way toward your jawline and neck. oftentimes he tries not to leave too many marks so no one asks questions. however now he’s sucking a very visible bruise on your skin, like he’s claiming you as his own.

“can i take these off, princess?” he asks, tugging lightly on your clothes. you’re still in the middle of catching your breath but you nod your head. with your permission jean carefully peels the fabric off of you. he starts with your top and when it’s removed he trails kisses down your stomach.

when he reaches your bottoms you give jean a hand in slipping them off your legs. now you’re left in nothing but a bra and pantie set you picked out just for him. “so pretty” jean murmurs to himself, situating his face between your legs. “todays all about you, alright babydoll? gonna make you feel so good” he hums before leaves an open mouth kiss over your clothes clit.

a shiver runs up your spine as he assists you out of your underwear. you aren’t totally sure where he discards them but you could have sworn you witnessed jean shove the panties in the pocket of his pants. you have no time to really think about it as jean latches his mouth on to your clit.

a moan comes echoing from you as your fingers take through his brown hair. jean groans when you pull lightly on the locks that he’s been growing out. the cute sounds you’re making the sweetest melody his ears have had the pleasure of hearing. he wants to hear more so when jean finishes paying attention to your lick he begins to lap up your folds.

“already so wet. so good f’me” his praises are muffled as he pushes his face closer to your core. you attempt to help by keeping your legs as spread as possible but when jean’s plunged into your pussy you can’t stop yourself. you thighs close around his head but based on jean’s reaction he likes it. the minute to start suffocating him with the soft pounds of flesh he moans lowly. as his wet muscle swirls around your gummy walls he has to rut his hips into the bed in order to relieved his strained cock.

“taste like heaven. nothing i’d rather eat” his voice filling your ear drums only doubles your pleasure. it doesn’t help that his nose is pressed against your sensitive nub. you’re not sure how much of this you can take. you had no way of knowing but the next thing jean says pushes you over the edge. maybe it was the way your nails were digging into his scalp or how your whimpers were going up in volume. either way jean predicts that your orgasm is closing in on you. “is MY baby getting close. you can cum whenever you want”.

it doesn’t matter that his sentence was somewhat suppressed by your cunt. you still hear him loud and clear when jean calls you “his baby”. something about him taking ownership over you really solidifies in your head that this isn’t a hallucination. this is real. jean loves you back. that fact alone is enough to make you cream on his face.

“fuck, that’s my baby” jean says as he slurps up the mess. it’s so lewd that you have to cover your face as he completes his meal. at some point you feel jean gently grab your wrists to stop you from hiding yourself. “wanna see you, princess”.

reluctantly, you move your arms away. you’re immediately greeted with your cum dripping down jean’s chin as he stares down at you. before you can comment on time he’s giving you another passionate kiss. you go from whining as you taste yourself to giggling when the whiskers of his bread give you a tickle.

“i love you, understand?” he mumbles against your lips, earning a genuine nod from you. “what do you wanna do now, princess?” jean proceeds, giving you a tender smile when he pulls away.

“i should probably return the favour, shouldn’t i? you were talking about how you needed to let out some frustration,” you reply.

jean chuckles, shaking his head. “that’s already been taken care of” he informs you before guiding your hand over his crotch. you gasp when you feel the damp spot. “tasting you was enough to make me cum” he smirks as your face heats up. “but if you wanna keep this going i’d be more than happy to breed you. 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐃𝐎𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃, 𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘𝐃𝐎𝐋𝐋?”.

2022–2023 © ilyluffy — do not repost or translate my work. likes, reblogs, and comments are welcome

#jean kirstein #jean kirschstein #attack on titan #aot #snk #jean kirstein x reader #jean kirstein smut #jean kirschstein x reader #jean kirschstein smut #attack on titan x reader #attack on titan smut #aot x reader #aot smut #snk x reader #snk smut #apollo writes ✎

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daisynik7 · 1 year

Text

Rush

Chapter 9: Could've Been

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x f!reader

Rating: Explicit

cw: cunnilingus (face riding), vaginal sex (cowgirl), underaged drinking, angst

Summary: On the night of Alpha Tau’s fall formal, you finally do something that should have been done a long time ago.

Notes: Song is “Could’ve Been” by H.E.R. (ft. Bryson Tiller)

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In the days preceding Alpha Tau’s fall formal, Eren doesn’t hear a peep from her. The night he broke the news about taking Pieck as his date, she hung up on him without waiting for a goodbye. He should have predicted this type of reaction. Given how clingy she’s been in the past, he was hoping for a truce in the form of sex after a few days of letting it simmer. That’s how he lands back in her good graces time and time again.

Even with this radio silence, it doesn’t faze him much. He’s confident that he’s still got the upper hand. Once the weekend is over and she realizes nothing will happen between him and Pieck, the anger will subside; she’ll come crawling back. Eager and needy for him like always. Does he feel guilty for pissing her off? Sure, maybe just a bit. It is what it is.

Saturday afternoon, Eren and Armin head to Alpha Tau to board the first bus. Dressed in sweats and bags in hand, the two roommates part ways outside the house. Armin goes towards Annie, Hitch, and Connie. Eren is dragged to where Reiner, Sandra, and Bertolt wait. Pieck and the other Delta Mu sister, who Eren recognizes is Mikasa’s friend Louise, arrive five minutes later.

“Hi Eren,” Pieck says, a polite smile spread across her face.

“Hey. Thanks for coming with me.”

Louise stands next to Bertolt while Reiner hands out flasks to each of them, filled with what smells like vodka. He whispers, “Don’t worry, we have more bottles in our bags. We can refill at the hotel later.”

Sandra breaks away from their group to hug Hitch. Eren turns around to observe them, immediately making eye contact with Annie, who glares. He makes a mental note to steer clear of her the rest of the evening.

He scans the rest of the crowd to look for Mikasa and Jean. He doesn’t spot them, assuming they’ll be on the next bus scheduled to leave in half an hour. Mike is also noticeably missing.

Once boarded, Eren and Pieck sit beside each other in a comfortable silence for the first ten minutes of the ride. Attempting to initiate small talk, he reiterates, “Thank you again for coming with me to this.”

She giggles. “I’ll admit, I was a bit surprised to hear that you wanted to take me.”

“Why?” He sips from his flask, curious.

“I thought you’d take your girlfriend instead. You know, the one we played beer pong with at Halloween?” She says her name, causing Eren to sputter on his drink.

Whipping his head around to ensure no one else can hear them, he whispers, “What did you say?”

There’s a sly grin on her face as she responds, “It was very obvious. You couldn’t stop staring at her.”

“Well, she’s not my girlfriend. I barely know her,” he explains, hastily.

She raises a brow, studying him. “Who is she to you, then? It seems like there’s something going on between you two.”

“She’s no one,” he lies. A twinge of guilt spasms in his chest.

Shrugging, she relents. “Sorry for assuming. I guess I’m wrong.” She wears her pleasant smile again, unconcerned that she rocked his cool disposition. “Forget I said anything.”

He wasn’t expecting her name to be brought up at all tonight. It seems like everywhere he goes, she lingers, whether in his own mind or in that of others. It hasn’t been fifteen minutes into this bus ride, and he’s already flustered. He drinks more alcohol to suppress his feelings until she’s buried all the way in the back of his thoughts.

At the hotel, each brother checks into their room. Reiner, Bertolt, and Eren opt for single beds. Before they head up the elevator to their assigned floor, Armin passes by and mentions, “If you guys want to pre-game with us, we’re all rooming together in Room 310!”

Reiner scoffs. “No thanks. We’re going to have our own pre-game in my room.”

Sandra smacks him on the arm. “I want to hang out with Hitch. Let’s just pre-game in their room. It’s bigger and there will be more people. It’ll be way more fun.”

Reiner grumbles, “Fine. We’ll see you there. We’ll bring some of our alcohol.”

“Great! We brought some too. See you all in a bit!”

Up on the third floor, Eren and Pieck enter Room 324 in silence, both unsure what to talk about. He especially feels awkward after their conversation earlier on the bus. Pieck occupies the bathroom to change while he gets ready in one corner of the room. He decides on an all-black outfit comprised of a turtleneck sweater underneath his suit jacket, black slacks, and black oxfords. Pieck exits the bathroom, wearing a maroon floral dress that flows down to her ankles.

“You look great,” he compliments, as she puts on her shoes.

“Thank you!” she beams. “You too. You kinda look like a spy.”

He takes it as a compliment, focusing on his reflection in the mirror to style his hair in the classic man-bun. It’s only now that he recalls how Mike was the first to tie his hair up like this, way back at the beginning of the semester. You owe me if this gets you laid tonight, he remembers him saying. In a way, he does owe that idiot. He figures they’re even now, considering what happened on Halloween.

Thinking about him with her bothers Eren once again. But he takes solace knowing they won’t be together here. Rumor has it that the senior goes to formals alone on account of him notoriously getting too drunk to pay attention to his date. Certain this is still true, he isn’t concerned about running into her today. The evening will pass by smoothly. All according to plan.

He waits for Pieck to finish her makeup before heading down the hall to Room 310. Armin and Connie greet them, patting him on the back happily; Pieck goes over to the girls to introduce herself. Eren does his best to avoid the women, especially Annie, who continues to stare daggers at him every chance she gets.

The rest join soon after, the girls sticking together, the boys huddled in their own circle. Bertolt sneaks glances at Annie, who completely ignores him. Reiner miraculously does not make any offensive comments, a true rarity for him.

For the next hour, they drink while chatting, the girls casually dancing along to the music blasting through Connie’s speakers. Once it gets closer to 7:00 PM, they all pour whatever remaining liquor they have into their flasks to sneak downstairs. Eren is filling his with vodka when Annie intentionally bumps into him.

“Annie,” he nods.

“Jaeger,” she mutters, eyeing him with contempt.

He doesn’t say anything, not interested in conversing with her, predicting it will lead to the mention of a certain someone. She doesn’t give him a choice, though, as she begins speaking. “Pieck is nice. I hope you don’t lead her on, too.”

In a low voice, he responds, “I’m not interested in Pieck like that. I just had to bring someone.”

She scoffs, barely keeping herself quiet. Luckily, the music is loud enough to drown out their conversation. “I take back what I said to you last week. I don’t respect you at all. At least Reiner knows he’s an asshole and owns it. You on the other hand, you’re a lost cause. I still have no idea why she would associate with someone like you.”

“Can you just drop it already, Annie?” he hisses. “Can’t I have one night without her being thrown in my face like this?”

She blinks, a tiny smirk forming on her lips. “You have no idea, do you?”

“No idea about what?”

“Oh, nothing. You’ll see soon enough.” She steps away to join her friends again, leaving Eren to speculate on her ominous parting. It’s just Annie trying to get under his skin, which she always successfully does. Frustrated, he takes the whole vodka bottle and throws it back, swallowing a few shots worth until his throat burns.

Downstairs, the doors to the ballroom are open. Levi stands at the entrance greeting everyone as they enter. “Oi, pledges. Welcome to your first formal. Seating chart is over there.” He points to an easel with a large sign propped on it. “Have fun.”

Eren scans the poster for his name, seeing it listed under Table 3. He’s tipsy enough not to care who else is sitting with them. At the table, Marco is already seated next to his friend, a girl from the women’s soccer team. Petra from Sigma Nu Kappa sits next to an empty chair with a jacket slung over the back, presumably Levi’s. There are two remaining spots currently unoccupied.

They take their seats, Pieck chatting up the rest of the table as Eren examines his surroundings, trying to locate his friends. Armin and Connie are at a table with Erwin and his guest, Hange. Reiner and Bertolt sit three tables away with another brother and his date, SNK senior Nanabe. He has no idea where Mikasa and Jean are, neither of them making their appearance yet. The second bus should have already arrived, so he expects they’ll be making their grand entrance soon.

The venue continues to fill up, people situated in their seats, snacking on the appetizers. Most of the seniors are in line at the bar to purchase drinks, besides Levi, who is sober monitor.

Eren takes swigs from his flask, letting the vodka continue to take its effects on his mind and body. He feels good. Relaxed. Tonight, there will be no drama, exactly the way he planned it. If he keeps consuming liquor, she’ll remain in the furthest corner of his mind.

Still, the tiniest part of him misses her. But that’s what the alcohol is for. Forgetting.

He sits facing away from the doorway, so when Petra’s face lights up and Levi smirks, saying, “Ah, finally,” Eren has to physically turn around to see who it is they are talking to.

As soon as he recognizes them, the heat from the liquor seems to rush straight out of his body, leaving him frozen in place.

~~~

The week leading up to Alpha Tau’s formal, you start scheming. The infuriating phone call with Eren was just the fuel you needed to get you fired up.

Every decent quality about him, from his undeniable sex appeal to the occasional loving gestures, has been forced into the most secluded crevices of your mind. Instead, you let all the crummy details about him surface.

He took advantage of your naivety, knowing you were inexperienced and desperate for any form of affection. After he lured you in, he manipulated you into thinking you were special, that your many moonlight trysts with one another had to be kept a secret. As if it was so fucking romantic to keep you hidden away like his most prized possession when he was really trying to find more treasure elsewhere.

Worst of all, he won’t let you go. He has to have you. String you along until it’s the right time for him to toss you aside once he grows tired of you. Until you become an overused and rejected toy withering away into the worst version of yourself, all while he replaces you with someone shinier and new.

The only way to avoid that is to end it with him first. Officially and for good.

No more empty promises, no more subtle blows to your confidence and self-worth. No more heartbreak. You won’t allow him to desecrate your fragile heart any longer.

The easy route would be to have a private discussion about it. Maybe after the event, so you don’t ruin his fun weekend plans. But you don’t want it to be easy. You want it to be satisfying. Meaningful. You want it to hurt; not enough to mangle him, but just enough to leave a scar. If he ever becomes a better person later in life, he’ll always remember what he did to you, hopefully determined not to repeat the same mistakes.

Your plan is set in motion. The first step is to get yourself at Alpha Tau’s formal. On Wednesday, Armin invites you and Mikasa over to the fraternity house to eat dinner. You sit with Mike at one of the tables. Mikasa, who wants you at formal for her own selfish reasons, and Armin sit beside you. You plan to bombard the senior to bring you. It’s a known fact that Mike goes stag to these dances, the reason being that he always gets too drunk to pay enough attention to whoever he’s taking.

It doesn’t take much to convince him, though. You proposition him, explaining how much fun the two of you will have together, how you won’t mind if he gets blackout drunk. Even offering to take care of him if in the morning in case he has a hangover.

“Okay. I’ll make an exception for you. By the way, breakfast burritos are my go-to hangover cure.”

You smile at him. “Noted.”

“Do you think they’ll still let her go even though it’s past the deadline?” Armin asks.

“Erwin and Levi are my best friends. They’ll let me do anything, don’t worry. You will be my date this Saturday,” he emphasizes, winking.

With step one complete, the next move is to make a grand entrance.

Thursday afternoon, Mikasa, Annie, and Hitch accompany you to the mall to pick out your outfit. Your roommate suggests a red dress, similar to one that she’s planning to wear. Annie and Hitch, fully aware of your Eren situation, recommend a black, off-the-shoulder bodycon, coming down just past your knees. Complete with a side slit the runs up mid-thigh. A revenge dress.

Out of the fitting room, Mikasa let’s out a low whistle. “Okay, forget I even suggested red because this is everything.”

“You look hot!” Hitch exclaims.

“It’s perfect,” Annie says.

In it, you feel confident, beautiful, and most of all, powerful. You’re ready to pull the rug out from under him in one fell swoop.

Saturday arrives. At the hotel, you and Mike check into your single room. By the time you’re finished in the bathroom, you hear a soft knock on the door. Upon opening it, Mike, handsome and suave in his navy-blue suit, looks you up and down. “You look fucking amazing.”

You smile at him. “Thank you. So do you.”

The two of you share this unspoken agreement to remain friends, maybe with a couple benefits here and there. However, your main focus tonight is to deal with Eren.

“We better head to Erwin’s room now before I get any ideas.” Giving you one more look, he turns around to collect his bottle of Hennessy, waiting for you to slip into your heels.

Down the hall, Erwin, Hange, Petra, and Levi share a room, where they host the pre-game. Mikasa and Jean eventually join, as well as some other seniors. The president and vice president leave first to set up downstairs, dragging their dates along with them. One by one, more people leave until it’s just you, Mike, Mikasa, and Jean.

As it gets closer to dinnertime, you wobble towards the ballroom, tipsy and giggly from the cognac. Mike tries to hold you steady, but he’s no better off. You take a quick look at the seating chart, noting your assignment. Mikasa follows Jean to the other side of the room as you and Mike make your way to Table 3, finding it already mostly occupied. Petra and Levi, who you just saw, greet you with amused expressions on their faces.

It takes you a minute to register that Eren is seated at the same table, staring at you with wide eyes and a clenched jaw. This is not a part of your plan.

Regardless, this is going to be fun.

Avoiding his gaze, you and Mike occupy the empty seats between Pieck and Levi. You acknowledge your neighbor with a smile, who returns it.

“I love your dress. You look so pretty!” you compliment her.

“Thank you. You look pretty, too.”

You continue to chat with Pieck, completely ignoring Eren, who is visibly uncomfortable beside her.

You’re not exactly sure what the next step in your plan is yet. Once you made it to the dance, you figure you’d toy with him, flaunt your sexy black dress in his face until he’s drooling. And if you have the chance to catch him alone tonight, then you’d confront him, ending your relationship once and for all. But there’s no way to predict if that opportunity will ever come, considering how unlikely it is to get a moment alone together. Deciding to go with the flow, you try to relax, relishing the way Eren sneaks subtle glances at you.

Dinner starts. Mike is already on his third drink from the bar, speech slurred, tie loosened. Definitely drunk. Levi attempts to slow him down by switching his cocktail with a glass of water, which works until Mike finally notices the difference. By the time the entrees are out, he gets up once more for another rum and coke.

For the first time all night, you hear Eren speak. “He’s fucking wasted.” There’s malice in his voice, clearly annoyed.

Levi shrugs. “He always does this at formals.”

Eren rolls his eyes. “It’s distracting.”

Petra chimes in. “Oh, he’s harmless.”

He stands up abruptly, rattling the table. “Whatever. I’m getting some punch.”

You wait a minute or two to make your move. “I’m going to get punch too. Anybody want anything?”

Pieck says, “I’d like some, please.”

“You got it. I’ll be right back.”

Eren is alone when you approach the refreshments table, opposite side of the room from where the bar is. He takes a sip from his punch before reaching into his pocket for a flask. He notices you as you pour two cups of punch for yourself and Pieck.

He looks around, making sure the coast is clear. “What are you doing here?”

“Oh, so you’re actually speaking to me in public now?”

He ignores that, repeating, “What are you doing here?”

“I’m getting myself and your date punch, since you aren’t doing it yourself.”

Taking a deep breath, he mutters, “You know what I mean. Why didn’t you tell me you were coming here with Mike?”

“Why should I? You never told me that you were going to bring Pieck until after the fact. And as far as I know, we don’t have to tell each other anything. You’re not my boyfriend.”

He blinks at you, seemingly at a loss for words. You continue to glare at him, waiting for a response.

After a couple of seconds, he murmurs, “This is different.”

“How?”

“I have no intentions of fucking Pieck. But Mike…I know he’s trying to fuck you.”

“Is that all I’m good for? Sex? Has it ever crossed your mind that Mike actually likes me?” Your composure is beginning to crack.

“Come on, I see the way he looks at you. He’s a fucking skeeze,” he spits out.

“So what? At least he talks to me. Acknowledges my existence.”

He swallows hard, saying in a low voice, “That’s not fair.”

“Well, it’s the truth.”

You stare at one another, neither of you backing down. You’re tempted to tell him it’s over, that you want to end it with him. But it still doesn’t feel like the right time yet. Maybe you want it to hurt a little more.

As you turn around to walk back to the table, you hear him say, “You look beautiful, by the way. You are beautiful.”

Shit. You promised yourself you wouldn’t fall for his sweet talk. Every time he calls you that, your heart flutters.

Without responding, you walk away from him and back to your seat, handing Pieck her punch. Mike is back in his chair, scarfing down his steak. A few minutes later, Eren sits down, clearing his throat nervously. Focused on the plate of food in front of you, his compliment replays in your head like lyrics to your favorite song. You grip your fork tightly, upset for wavering, trying to convince yourself that it doesn’t mean anything.

You eat your meal in peace, casually chatting with the others, except for Eren, who remains sullen and quiet. Dessert is served and there’s a couple of minutes for everyone to digest and socialize. Erwin makes a quick announcement, thanking all of the brothers for a great semester, despite last year’s scandal. He even gives a special shoutout to Sigma Nu Kappa for a successful partnership, helping them regain their well-received reputation. He signals to the DJ, who starts up the music again, formally opening up the dancefloor.

“Let’s go,” Eren mumbles to Pieck.

She has an excited expression on her face as she asks, “Are we going to dance?”

“No, we’re going to Reiner’s table. C’mon.”

Frowning, she follows him to where Reiner and Bertolt sit with their dates, looking bored and unenthused.

Grinning at Mike, you yank his wrist, beckoning him to the dancefloor. He gives you a goofy smile and follows, joining your friends who already started dancing. More people surround you, creating a lively atmosphere as the music blares through the speakers.

Mike dances behind you, sliding his hands around your waist to pull you in closer. He buries his face in the crook of your neck, the bold scent of liquor emanating from his warm breath. You feel the vibrations on your skin as he hums along to the song.

You place your hands over his, swinging your hips in rhythm to the music as he moves with you. You glance over to where Eren’s sits, sulking right alongside Reiner and Bertolt, their poor guests watching the rest of the crowd in envy. Once in a while, your eyes meet; you quickly look away to turn your attention back to Mike and the rest of your friends.

~~~

The last person Eren expects to see tonight is her. Yet, here she is, gorgeous and stunning, exactly like in his fantasies. She wears that dress as if it was tailored to her and only her. It’s perfection.

Except for the fact that Mike is wrapped around her like a fucking snake.

The universe has a funny way of messing with Eren. And rightfully so, considering what an asshole he’s been. Still, this form of punishment seems a little too cruel.

He watches from a distance as he slithers all over her, practically salivating on her, similar to a beast in the wild preparing for a feast. Eren’s skin crawls with rage and jealousy.

“You’re not going to dance, are you?” he hears Sandra ask Reiner, who slouches lazily in his seat.

“Nope.”

Rolling her eyes, she says, “Fine. I’m going to join Hitch and her friends then. You’re boring.”

“Whatever, have fun with those freaks,” he mumbles.

Suddenly, Eren feels a tap on his shoulder, finding Pieck and Louise standing together with their purses in hand. “Louise and I are going back to campus. She’s not feeling well.”

He quickly turns around to look at Bertolt, who’s propped up on his elbow against the table, looking absolutely disinterested.

Facing the girls again, he asks Pieck, “You have to go too?”

She nods. “Yeah, I don’t want her to go alone.”

“Are you coming back?”

“I don’t think so. Honestly, you’re not a fun person.”

Ouch. Her bluntness stings. Can he blame her, though? He’s not exactly a bundle of joy right now.

“Anyways, our Uber is coming, so we’re just going to wait outside.” They walk towards the exit, leaving the three moody Alpha Tau brothers alone.

Eren leans back in his chair, defeated. He envisioned formal differently. In his imagination, he’s having fun with her as his date. He should be out there right now, not Mike. Dancing, smiling, and laughing around their friends. Happy and carefree together. Instead, he’s sitting in the corner, pretending to be too cool to have a good time.

It's his own fault. He refuses to admit it out loud, but he did let Reiner influence his decisions. Is he really that desperate to create a reputation for himself that won’t matter in a few years? Maybe even in a few months? At the rate he’s going, he’ll be known for being a dud anyways. It’s not like he was actively trying to be a fuck boy, considering he’s only ever wanted to be with her since they started.

Besides, what’s so bad about dating a Sigma Nu Kappa? Reiner is the only one who seems to have an issue with it. On his big brother’s word alone, Eren has been convinced that dating an SNK girl is a disgrace. He didn’t even think to question it until now. There’s nothing wrong with them. Sure, Annie can be scary most of the time, but he recognizes how loyal she is to those she cares about. Mikasa has been his friend for years, and while she can be just as intense as he is, she loves her friends fiercely.

And with her, he can’t think of any major flaws. To him, she’s beautiful, inside and out.

He lays his head on the table, confused about his feelings, which are constantly in limbo. So much so that even he can’t keep up with himself. Again, he wonders why this is more difficult than it needs to be. Is he that afraid of falling in love?

From his peripheral, he notices her and Mike walk off the dancefloor. The senior heads straight to the bar while she exits the ballroom. Without thinking, Eren follows her from a distance. In the hotel lobby, he watches her make her way outside, probably to cool herself down after nearly an hour of dancing.

He sinks into one of the couches, waiting for her to reappear. He wants a moment alone, just the two of them. Away from the crowd, uninterrupted by the music. Most of all, he wants to invite her to his room now that he has it all to himself. This is an opportunity he didn’t think he’d get at all today. He’ll regret it if he doesn’t take advantage of it.

Once she’s back in the lobby, she heads down the hallway leading to the bathrooms. Giving him the opening he’s been wishing for all night.

~~~

After an hour of dancing, you feel yourself overheating from the constant movement and the heat radiating from the crowd. You and Mike decide to take a break. He leaves for the bar to take shots with Erwin and the other seniors. Sweat beading on your forehead, you make your way outside, in dire need for fresh air. Pieck and Louise are huddled, standing at the curb.

“Are you two leaving already?” you ask, waving your hand across your face like a fan, still burning up from all the dancing.

Pieck replies, “Yeah. Louise isn’t feeling well, so we’re going back.”

“Oh no! Are you alright? Do you need medicine or anything?”

Louise grins, answering, “Do you have a pill for someone dying of boredom? Because that’s what I need for Bertolt.”

Surprised and amused at her joke, you chuckle, “What do you mean?”

“He barely talks! Every time I try to start a conversation, he only gives me one-word answers. And he keeps ogling at Annie. That dude has it so bad for her, it’s sad.”

“So you’re not really sick?”

“Of course not. I just needed an excuse to get us out of there.”

Laughing, you look over at Pieck. “How about you? Were you not having fun either?”

She shrugs, that same polite smile on her face. “Not really.”

“You should have joined us on the dancefloor!”

She laughs. “But how would I get out of spending the night in the same room as Eren? I figured it’s better to just bail completely.” She pauses, then says, “You know, he’s always staring at you.”

Surprised by her observation, you look at her, silently waiting for her to explain further.

“It was just like at the Halloween party. Either he really hates you or he’s absolutely crazy about you. I’m guessing it’s the latter.”

You look down at the ground, flustered. “I don’t know about that.”

She leans in to nudge you gently in the arm. “It’s pretty obvious he’s got a thing for you. I even told him earlier today how I was surprised that he was taking me instead of you. His girlfriend.”

“I am not his girlfriend. I’m sure he told you that, too.”

“Yeah, he did. But he’s a dumb, immature boy. Of course he’s too proud to admit it.”

“I don’t think it’s pride that’s getting in his way. It’s his ego.” Fearing you revealed too much, you veer off. “Anyways, I’m sorry you two didn’t have a good time.”

“At least the food was good,” Louise comments. Her phone chimes. “Oh, our Uber is almost here. Tell Mikasa I say bye! I didn’t get a chance to tell her I’m leaving.”

“Will do. Have a safe ride home!” You bid them farewell then walk back into the lobby, the distinct thump of the bass resounding from the ballroom. Still feeling sticky with sweat, you head to the bathroom down an empty hallway to blot your face and touch up your makeup.

As you exit, you notice Eren leaning against the wall, waiting for you. The two of you hold each other’s gaze for a few seconds before he suddenly takes you by the wrist and leads you farther into the hall, hidden behind a large plant.

Back pressed to the wall, trapped by both his hands at either side of your head, you stare at him wide-eyed as he studies you with uneven breaths. You swallow hard, muttering his name.

One of his hands slide over your shoulder, fingertips tickling your skin gently until they’re at your wrist. He brings your hand up to his lips and scatters soft kisses in between your knuckles.

“My date left, so I have the room all to myself. Room 324. Come by,” he whispers, kissing the inside of your wrist. “Please.”

You feel your heart race and a familiar sensation fluttering below your belly as he continues to kiss you, green eyes peering at you longingly.

“I’m with Mike,” you stutter, suddenly shy under his gaze.

“Well, if he’s too drunk to get it up, you know where to find me,” he teases, smiling into your skin. He drops your hand and cups your cheek, leaning in closer. “Can I kiss you?”

Every fiber of your being is screaming at you to refuse his advances. But one kiss wouldn’t hurt, right? You reach for the collar of his sweater and push your lips together. His tongue slips inside your mouth in an instant, eager for a taste.

You pull away from him. “Maybe I don’t want to see you later tonight.”

He flashes a cocky smirk. “Sure. Whatever you say.”

You’re tempted to kiss him once more. Instead, you push him off and walk away, heading back into the ballroom.

Mike is slouched onto Levi’s shoulder at your table. When Levi spots you, he yells out, “Oi, I think I’m going to bring him back to your room now. He’s pretty much passed out.”

You sit beside them, stroking Mike’s arm. “Is he okay?”

“Yeah, he’s fine. Just piss drunk. Feel free to hang out here for a little while longer.”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll help you,” you offer. “Just in case.”

“Alright. Let’s go.”

The two of you sling Mike’s arms over your shoulders, carrying him as he drags his feet languidly. Once you’re back inside your room, you and Levi carefully place him on the bed, where he shifts around until he’s snuggled with a pillow, grunting occasionally. Levi snorts, “Idiot.”

He looks to you and says, “Thanks for helping me. Sorry he’s like this.”

“No worries. I’m not mad. I should have expected this.”

Levi leaves, heading back as you sit at the edge of the bed, watching Mike snore noisily. You fill a glass of water and set it on the dresser beside him in case he needs to hydrate. You poke him with your finger, which only causes him to mumble something incoherent. To be fair, you were warned about this.

You hear your phone vibrate in your purse. There’s one new message:

Eren: I’m in my room now

Staring at the text, you contemplate your next move. This is the opportunity you were hoping for. A moment alone with Eren, a chance to fulfill what you need to do. Despite all the anger and resentment you harbor for him, there’s still a part of you that desires to be with him one last time.

Letting your feet lead you to Room 324, you decide to give in to one more moment of weakness.

~~~

Eren sits at the end of the bed, staring at the text message he just sent, eagerly waiting for a response. Tapping his foot nervously, he checks his phone every five seconds to make sure he isn’t missing anything.

Ten grueling minutes pass and a gentle knock on the door stirs his insides. He takes a deep breath and opens the door, thrilled to see her, still in her sensual black dress that’s been tantalizing him all fucking night.

He pulls her into the room, double locking the door when it shuts. Squishing her adorable cheeks between his palms, he leans forward and kisses her hungrily, tongue licking her lips and grazing her teeth. Desperate to taste every bit of her that he’s been deprived of all week long.

They lie on the bed, him on top of her, his hands roaming her body starting from her neck down to her legs. Flirting with the seductive slit exposing her thighs. The dress is skintight, hugging every inch of her figure flawlessly. His cock is already hard beneath his slacks, and they haven’t even undressed yet.

“Take my clothes off,” she breathes out, rolling to her side to show him the zipper. He obeys, marveling at her bare back as he splits the dress open. He trails kisses along the skin he uncovers. She slides the dress off at her shoulders, where he gives her a nibble, resulting in that cute giggle he loves hearing so much.

“Don’t giggle like that with anyone else. Only me,” he demands, kissing her sloppily as he shoves her dress lower to reveal her breasts. He hovers over her, sucking at one of her nipples until it’s plump and taut between his lips.

“Fuck,” she moans, squirming beneath him as she wiggles out of her dress completely. In record time, Eren strips off all of his clothes, leaving just his briefs, barely concealing his erection.

“I’ve missed you,” he whispers, mouth surrounding her other tit as his fingers drift to her arousal, rubbing at the wet spot of her black lace panties. “I’ve missed this pretty pussy, too.”

He slips his middle finger pass the fabric, collecting the slick from her entrance to rub onto her clit. Upon contact, her hips buck, begging for more of his touch. With a chuckle, he releases her nipple from his mouth to suck on a spot on her neck, hard enough to leave a mark. He buries his nose in the divot of her collarbone, inhaling her intoxicating, familiar scent.

“Can I taste you?” he asks, dying to quench his thirst, willing to drown in her arousal.

She nods, fingers hooking the hem of her underwear to remove them. He slides them off her, eyeing her naked body greedily.

“Sit on my face. I want it to drip into my mouth.”

She curses under her breath, scooting over for him to lie down. He can’t help but smile as she straddles him, gripping the headboard and slowly lowering her hips so her pussy is flush against his lips.

“Don’t hold back, baby. Ride my face like you ride my cock.” With his hands on her hips, he sucks on her clit until she’s whining in pleasure, slick trickling out of her slit and onto his chin.

She rocks back and forth, obeying his instructions like the good girl she’s always been.

“Come all over my face, baby. Get that pussy really wet for my cock.”

Moaning, she ruts against him faster, his lips surrounding her as he flicks her clit with his tongue rapidly. Cum coats his mouth and chin. She carefully lifts herself off, kneeling besides him, eyes glazed over from her orgasm.

Sitting up to face her, he caresses her cheek, pulling her in for a passionate kiss. He takes his time, appreciating her supple lips and the subtle contrast of his rough thumb brushing over the delicate skin of her cheekbone. He reaches down his briefs, sliding them off and tossing them to the floor. He strokes his cock, craving to feel her lush walls squeeze tightly around him.

~~~

Eren breaks away, slightly out of breath, whispering, “Can you ride me? I want to see your face.”

The words slip out of his mouth, smooth like butter, enticing as ever. You nod, granting his request. Knowing this will be the last time.

He lies back down, gazing at you. You straddle his lap, rubbing your wet folds against him before you position your entrance at the tip of his dick. Without using your hands, you slide onto him, feeling the vibrations from his gravely moans reverberate through his chest.

You ride him slowly, thrusting your ass onto his hard cock. He squeezes your hips, directing you to move faster. You resist, determined to set your own pace. For once, you’re in control, not him.

“Fuck, you’re so good. You’re so fucking good to me,” he chants as you grind onto his lap. You start moaning along with him, succumbing to the pleasure, leaning onto his chest, and listening to his racing heartbeat. He keeps one hand at your waist; the other at the nape of your neck, pulling you in closer.

“God, you’re beautiful. I’m so lucky. I’m so fucking lucky,” he whispers to you, lips grazing your ear. You tilt your head up to meet his gaze.

“Kiss me,” he says, staring at you with soft eyes, yearning for you.

You lean in to brush your lips against his, making him think everything is fine. Sending him to Cloud 9 so that he can crash down onto the cold, hard dirt once you’re through with him.

After a few minutes of fucking, he mutters, “I’m sorry.”

The apology catches you off guard. He’s pulling every weapon out of his arsenal, his velvety words attempting to latch on to you like a leech.

“I’m sorry about tonight. I’ll make it up to you, okay? I promise.”

You don’t respond. With your eyes shut, you continue to ride him, letting your second orgasm build up.

He caresses your cheek again, thumb brushing the soft skin right below your eye. “Baby, please look at me.”

His expression is sincere; there’s warmth in the way he looks at you, affection in the small smile he displays.

“I’m yours, okay? I’m all yours.”

You’re close. It’s almost over. He’s tugging at your heartstrings like he never has before. But this time, it’s not enough. You’re not falling for it anymore.

“I promise you; everything is going to be okay,” he whispers, kissing your forehead, voice trembling.

He makes promises just as easily as he breaks them. You’ve lost trust in him completely. His words mean nothing. They no longer have this everlasting hold on you.

Still silent except for the soft whines that escape from your lips, you ride him faster, wanting to milk him for all he’s worth. Take advantage of him the way he has with you.

“Fuck,” he groans, planting his feet onto the bed and moving his hips in rhythm with your thrusts. “You’re going to make me come, sweetie. Is that what you want?”

You nod into his neck, his hands now holding you in place as he starts pounding into your pussy relentlessly.

“Okay, baby. I’ll give it to you. I’m all yours. All yours,” he repeats, fucking you until you reach your orgasm, letting the pleasure sweep through you.

Soon after, he groans a drawn out, “Fuck,” as you feel his hot load fill you up.

He holds you in his arms, no rush to let you go. Nose pressed into the top of your head, inhaling and exhaling deeply. You savor the steady cadence of his heartbeat, the rise and fall of his chest, the warmth of his skin. Letting yourself imagine only for a short moment that this is what could’ve been if it was any different with you two. Nostalgic for a relationship that never really existed to begin with. One that was doomed from the start.

Maybe you’ll meet again in another lifetime. One where it’s genuine. Painless. Easy.

Just not this one.

His arms loosen as soon as you initiate movement. You remain silent as you pick your dress off the floor and carry it with you into the bathroom. The knob turned all the way to hot, you wait as the heat from the shower fills the space with a steamy cloud. Stepping in carefully, you let the water rinse any cum and sweat from your body, erasing all traces of Eren.

When you’re finally cleansed, you dry yourself with a towel and slip into your black dress. Studying your reflection in the mirror, you take a few deep breaths, preparing for your final act.

~~~

Eren cannot stop smiling.

He’s lying on the bed, palms behind his head, arms splayed out to the sides. Cock glistening with cum. Sheets messy, pillows disheveled all from their love making. He’s in fucking paradise. Whenever they have sex, he always feels on top of the world. Totally and utterly elated. Soaring on Cloud 9.

The best part is that it’s not Mike who she’ll be spending the rest of the night with. It’s him. Eren is the winner. He gets the prize.

It doesn’t even bother him how he uprooted his buried feelings for her. He’ll blame it on the alcohol, which has since dissipated from his bloodstream nearly an hour ago. Or he’ll blame it on being caught up in their fuck fest. Either way, it seems she’s no longer mad at him. He’s got everything under control.

Several minutes pass before she comes out of the bathroom, wearing her black dress. He stretches his arms out, beckoning her back into bed. “Come here, baby. Let’s cuddle.”

She leans down to collect her heels and purse from the floor. “I’m leaving.”

He grins at her odd joke. “Baby, stop kidding around. Come here.”

“I’m leaving,” she repeats. “I don’t want to do this anymore.”

The smile fades, his brain slowly processing the words coming out of her mouth. “What? What are you talking about?”

“Eren, I’m ending this. It’s over. You and me. We’re done.”

----------

End Notes: We’re almost near the end y’all! Thank you for sticking with it! Also, thanks so much for all the comments, messages, likes, and reblogs. I can’t express into words how grateful I am for every single interaction this fic gets. It gives me LIFE! So much love for ALL of you. 💕

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Tag List:

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nightfall-kachiniko · 2 years

Text

AOT girls (+hange) with s/o who has an ED

tw: ed talk of eating disorders, anorexic reader, body dysmorphia, various eating disorders, vomit, blood, descriptive mentions of suffering with an ed.

cw: mikasa, annie, pieck, hange, hitch, sasha, ymir, historia, gn!anorexic!reader

a/n: writing this bc of relapse, thought if I needed it someone else out there needed some comfort too. Youre not alone.

𓏲·˚ ͙ mikasa

- the worst part of your day was always looking at yourself in the mirror, you’re eyes never failing to be filled with glimpse of hatred and disappointment. Its all you could ever do. No matter how fast you walked past your mirror, or how quickly your eyes glanced over at the little scale beneath your sink, you always had to give in. Food became numbers and no longer names. An apple renamed as ‘90’or 15 grapes being referred to as ‘50’. That voice ringing in the back of your head as you picked at your skin in your reflection. Little words beginning to spill out from the back of your mind and to your subconscious. It was never enough. No matter how far the numbers went down on the scale, all you could see was a blur in your mirror. That’s all you ever were.

- “you look beautiful,” a voice behind you softly said as you jumped, looking at your girlfriends reflection in the mirror, startling you. “Ah.. shit..” you muttered, “you scared me,” you chuckled out. She unfolded her arms as she came up behind you. Her hands wrapped comfortingly around your waist, as she buried her head into the back crook of your neck, placing a small kiss on your skin. “I wish you could see yourself the way I see you,” she spoke gently. The embarrassing feeling washed over you as you let out a small scoff, you’re eyes avoiding hers in the mirror. “You tear yourself to pieces, baby..just because you don’t like one little thing about you.” You could feel her orbs looking at yours as you looked to the opposite side. “You are so perfect y/n.” She said. “I just.. I don’t feel it..” you whispered, your eyes looking back at your body in the mirror. Disgust and disappointment in them. Mikasa softly kissed your skin, her arms tightening around you. “I have loved you since the day I met you.” She confessed. “All of you.” A soft smile appeared on your face, as you finally met her eyes. “I see the way you look at yourself.” You felt your girlfriends soft breath on your neck. “Your face filled with total disappointment and hatred.” She placed another kiss on your skin. “But to me, you’re perfect.” You sighed, looking down at the sink, inhaling and exhaling a deep, shaky breath. “You are the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.” That feeling washed over you again. The one that is so indescribable it doesn’t have a word for it. “I wish you could see that.” Mikasa brought her hand up to your face, cupping it gently as you made you face her. You turned your body away from the mirror and to her eyes, inches away from her lips. “I love you, more than anything I can describe.” She kissed your cheek, “and no matter what you think of yourself, the way I have always seen you is so different from what you think.”

“You’re loved, y/n.”

𓏲·˚ ͙ annie

- your girlfriend placed a plate in front of you as you looked up at her, your face confused. “You’re eating.” The woman spoke, “that’s final.” You felt your chest drop as the words escaped her mouth. A feeling of anxiety coming over you as you looked back at the plate in front of you. “I..” you managed to get out, “I’m not-”

“Hungry?” Annie asked, “yes you are.” There was a pit in your stomach, but not the one from not eating. The one filled with fear, guilt. “I’ve heard that lame ass excuses too many damn times to count.” She said, “and if I have to sit here and spoon feed you like a child then I will,” Your leg shook as you fidgeted in anxiety. A shaky breath exhaled from your lips. “Im not gonna sit here and let you do this to yourself.” Annie’s words softened up from what she previously spoke. You locked eyes with her, the voice in the back of your head ringing like a fly next to your ear. ‘Is it really worth it?’ It said. “Annie, I can’t.” You spilled out. “Yes you can and you are,” your girlfriend said more sternly. “All it is is just more calories to burn,” you tried to explain. “Calories?” She scoffed, “you’re so fixated on calories that that’s the first thing that comes to your mind when you look at this.” You sighed. “Not even that its youre favorite food? Or that it’s what you had on our first date?” You looked back at the plate as you realized that what Annie said was true. Your mind just went straight to calories, nothing more than just calories. “Anne.. I’m sorry I didn’t even realize..” you said, guilt in your voice. “This whole ‘fitness’ thing,” she shook her head, “isn’t even fitness if all you’re doing is hurting yourself.” Her eyes laid on you like stone. “You..” she inhaled, trying to hold herself back. “You are gonna keep doing this until you finally kill yourself.” Those words. They couldn’t be true, no no this helps you this doesn’t hurt you. What’s with a little bit of hunger for something you’ve wanted to years? “I am not going to kill myself!” You pushed your chair back from the table as you stood up, exclaiming. “I am finally losing weight! This is helping me!” The woman stood up too, “This is killing you y/n how do you not realize it!” She yelled back. “I don’t know if you care or not but there are people that love and care about you.” Annie’s breath shook as her emotion changed from anger to a sadness. “I love you, and I can’t stand to see you do this to yourself.” She explained, as tears piled up in her eyes. “I don’t want you to die.” Her words echoed through your head as you felt a glimpse of guilt. “Annie. Im not going to die.” You whispered. She hugged you as you felt her body slightly shake. “Please y/n.. I can’t lose you.”

𓏲·˚ ͙ peick

- “honey? Are you going to eat?” Your eyes glanced up from your plate to your wife, seeing concern in her eyes. Your heart pounded with a gutting feeling as you replied with a “I’m just not hungry..” you said, starring back at the plate in front of you. You felt a hand touch yours as pieck held your hand from across the table. “Baby is there something you wanna tell me?” She asked, gently. You sat there and just sighed, wanting to sink deep into your seat and hopefully into a hole in the floor. “No I’m fine pieck.” You stated a bit more firmly as you sipped your water.

- Your wife admired your face as she studied all of its details. From your sunken in eyes to your cracked lips, your pale clammy face to the slight tremble you shook. She had just recently picked up on your habits and started to study you closely-watching from afar. But pieck couldn’t take it, she couldn’t bear to continue to watch you do this to yourself. “I know there’s something going on y/n..” she gently said, breaking the silence in the air. “and i wanna help you..” Your eyes avoided pieck’s as you looked to your plate. “I know you’re hurting yourself.. and I can’t stand here and let you hurt like this..” she said. “Y/n look at me..” you felt guilt pile up like a weight on ur back, the heavy hurt you wanted to tell, the silent words that screamed in your mind yet never came out. You finally lifted your eyes to meet hers, seeing the hesitance and plead in her orbs “I’m here, I’m right here.” She stated, giving out a small smile. And you knew she was.

𓏲·˚ ͙ hange

- The fullness. All you craved. All you ate. Its all you felt. All you regret. And now staring down into the pool of vomit in the toilet that laid in front of you, your body shaking as you tell yourself ‘one more time, just throw up one more time’ as the world became blurry in your vision. You told yourself last time was the last time you’d ever binge, yet here you are again, telling yourself the same lie. You couldn’t tell if the reason why tears streamed down your cheeks was because of the pounding fist you forced to the back of your throat, or the crippling sadness you felt lying inside your chest. It was like poking a sleeping bear, food was. Telling yourself that today would be the day you finally get back on track, where you actually stop the cycle of sleep, starve, binge. Though the second your mind wondered a bit too far, or your tongue missed the flavour of that longing food you resisted yourself from having all week , it was like yelling at the bear to wake up and devour you. And yes, the bear did. The impulsive second as you would grab whatever you could, whatever you wanted, whatever you deprived yourself of having, and eating it like it was your last meal on earth. Not caring if you hadn’t lost ten pounds, not caring if you had gained five. And in those seconds, in those moments where it all poured down your throat, you felt nothing. Not a single thing, just a relief. Thats until you walked past your reflection, or felt your stomach bulge in fullness. Feeling like a glutton, starring at empty wrappers and dirty dishes. Wondering to yourself, why did i do that, why did i do it again. No one got it. No one understood what your night time snacking really was. Your partner, Hange, glad that at least you did eat something today. But its not what you wanted. The feeling of fullness, a sin to you. So no one would notice when you turned the sink on to use the bathroom after eating. Why you’d barricade yourself inside those four walls, shoving your hand down your throat in an attempt to get rid of the mess you made. And even as your teeth start to brittle, or your knuckles start to break, all you wanted was to escape.

-And finally throwing up that last chunk of whatever you let yourself consume, you threw yourself back at wall, gasping for air as blood mixed with stomach acid and spit ran down both your fist and your mouth. “Y/n..” a soft knock was heard at the door as your eyes widened and body tensed, throwing yourself at the puke filled toilet to flush it. The door opened as your eyes laid in shock and fear, your partners eyes laying on you sitting on the floor, arm flushing the toilet. You quickly wiped your mouth, just to realize all you did was spread the vomited blood and spit more. Hange’s eyes filled with shock and terror as hers matched your own. You braced yourself with fear hidden deep within you, only to be met by a strong firm hug. Hange pressed you, covered in blood, spit, and vomit up close to her. Her hand stroked your hair as your eyes glistened with tears of sadness and relief. You were finally seen. You felt tears of her own stream down and drip onto you. “I’m.. im so sorry..” Your voice shook as well as your trembling body. “shh..” the brunette softly shushed you, giving you a kiss on the side of your head. “You don’t have to speak honey, I see you..”

𓏲·˚ ͙ hitch

- “Wow y/n! Going back for another run?” Your girlfriend looked at you as you headed out the door, your gym clothes on. “yep!” You said, “I still have 5,000 steps ‘till i reach my goal!” Hitch scoffed before saying, “Thats a bit intense, don’t you think?” She looked at you with one of her ‘hitch’ looks, a look where you just know what shes saying with her expression. “I mean.. three hour long runs in the same day..? Are you alright y/n?” You shrugged off her remark before saying “Yeah, just gotta burn off desert from yesterday, you know I had too much cake.” Hitch blew her hair out of her face with a sigh, “alright..” she rung out, “just dont over do it.” You smiled softly before heading out the door.

-“Is that all you’re having?” Marlo asked you, starring at the protein shake in your hand. “Yeah?” You questioned, “Why?” The conversation got Hitch’s attention, looking at you from the glasses she was pouring . “No way Y/n, go get some of the dinner I made.” You hesitated, quickly coming up with an excuse. “I’m on a liquid diet.” You said in response. Hitch’s eyes flicked over at you, concern in her eyes. Everyone continued talking, sharing stories from when you were all in the survey corps in you and hitch’s living room. The small get together was suppose to be a nice catch up event before your girlfriend somehow made it into a drinking party. The woman put down the champagne bottle and starred at you, quickly looking around the room before walking past you, nudging you to follow her. You did so, following her into your guy’s bedroom. She closed the door after you, motioning for you to sit down on te bed. “Y/n, whats been going on with you?” She said worried. “What?” You quickly shook off her concern before saying, “I’m fine-“ “No,” Your girlfriend resisted, “You’re not.” She sat down next to you, her hand placing over yours. “This whole.. fitness.. thing…this is more than just wanting to be healthy babe.” She explained, hitch careful with her words. You felt your heart sink, had it really been that obvious? You questioned yourself. “I- uh- i just want to better myself.” You stuttered until you came up with the right excuse. “Is this about losing weight?” She asked, her face more soft and monotoned. “No hitch its not.” You quickly brushed her off, standing up. “I’m fine, you’re over reacting-“ She scoffed hearing you dismissing her. “No I’m not Y/n, if anything this is seriously affecting you,” you felt irritated as you couldn’t stand hearing anymore of her worrying. “See! You get so easily mad at me because you’re not eating!” You honestly just wanted this conversation to be over. “So what if i want to lose a few pounds, thats my business not yours!” She shook her head in disbelief, “see, i told you its about losing weight! And all your doing by over exercising and not eating is damaging your body.” Hitch said, “I don’t want to see you like this, going through this.” Your girlfriend sighed, “I don’t want you thinking that you’re alone.” Your girlfriend placed her palm on the side of your face, “because y/n, you’re not.. i understand what you’re going through.. okay?” You practically melted into her touch, a feeling of relief coming over you as you did so. “I just don’t want you to think you’re alone baby.. because your not..” You saw the concern and love deepen in her eyes, as you realized all she cared about in that moment was being by your side. “I get it babe, I’ve been through it, it takes one to know one.” She scoffed a small laugh. “Hitch..” you softly whispered. “I love you okay? You’re my partner. I’ll always be by your side..” She said as she pecked a small kiss on the side of your cheek.

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damn-stark · 4 months

Text

Chapter 35 Can’t catch me now

Final chapter of Cherry

A/N: Thank you, I’m going to cry now that it’s over

Warning- FLUFF, mentions of pregnancy and birth complications, angst, and swearing

Takes place during- The final chapters special 2

Pairing- Jean Kirstein x fem!reader

————

What does he mean by talk?

Does he have a girlfriend back in Marley? One Connie, Levi, or Pieck mentioned?

Or maybe he’s going to say that he’s totally just over you. He doesn’t love you anymore.

You can’t take it, the anxiety is killing you.

“You look nice,” you interject and hide your nervousness well. “I like your hair, it’s different, it’s good.” You peer over your shoulder and flash Jean a smile.

He meets your gaze and a soft smirk tugs on his lips. “Thanks. You look nice now—I mean you look beautiful, but nice because the last time I saw you, you looked—”

“Bad?” You say to him with a small teasing smile.

Jean squints and parts his lips to argue, but you cut in again.

“It’s okay, it’s true,” you assure him. “I was in a bad place. Now I’m not. I’m okay now. Better than good actually, I’m great.”

You slide the door open to a secluded cabin on the train and walk in first before he follows you inside and closes the door behind him, letting you finally face each other.

“So I’ve read,” he says.

You study his handsome face and smile wider. “You look very nice. Is that okay to say?” You ask to get what you want to know from him. “Or should I hold back because of a special someone?” You wiggle your eyebrows and hope it isn't true.

Jean scoffs and shakes his head. “Nah…I tried it,” he admits, and you feel your heart clench—“but none of them worked out, I guess,” he rolls out and glances at the ground as he puts his hands in his pockets. “They weren’t you.”

Your heart skips a beat and your eyes widen. “What?” You gasp with disbelief.

Jean looks up at you and exhales deeply before he pulls his hands out and strides over to you with confidence. “I know I’ve been an ass and not written, but I wanted to give you space.”

“Jean,” you try to interject, but he grabs your shoulders and looks at you with a soft look that makes your face begin to burn.

“Listen okay?” He continues and looks into your eyes. “I love you, I always will no matter what, but I don’t want to just be your friend. I can’t be just a friend. I can be your best friend if we’re together, but I can’t live my life and pretend that we didn’t live a life together. That I didn’t love you with my entire being. I can't do that, I'm not that big of a person.”

Tears fill your eyes, but they’re not born from an ache, they’re tears of disbelief and shock.

“So,” he goes on softly and slowly places his hands on your cheeks. “That’s why I'm saying it now, it might be brazen and too much for you, but it’s the truth and if I didn’t say it I would be bothered and mean, you don’t deserve that. And well,” he sighs. “Too much shit has happened for us to be patient, and I’m afraid that if I continue to be patient, I won’t be able to say what has been stuck in my throat for years.”

You smile softly and gently slide your hands over to hold his arms. “Jean,” you whisper. “I love you. I do. I never stopped loving you. I never thought about anyone else but you, but,” you cut in and make his breath falter. “You can’t rush into this. We’ve hardly talked over the past 3 years, I don’t know you anymore. You don’t know me. We know a past of each other, but not who we turned into. You understand? I mean what if you don’t even like who I am now? I don’t want you to waste your time with me, I—”

“Shut up,” Jean cuts you off and pulls you closer to him, making your breath hitch and your eyes fall on his lips—“Just shut up you’re talking nonsense. All you’re saying is crap because I do know you,” he says. “I’ve read all the letters you sent me. All the letters you sent our friends, and I’m looking at you now and all I see is my future. I’ve fought for a long time, I know life isn’t long, and I don’t want to wait. We can get to know each other as we date. Just please be with me. I miss you.”

Your bottom lip trembles and all you feel is your heart race as butterflies flutter like crazy inside you.

Your life doesn’t feel complete because Levi still isn’t with you, but you feel safe and like the stars finally returned to orbit to give light to the world. Yes, you did heal from your deep wounds without him, you couldn’t have him with you, but the one thing that didn’t change throughout it all was your feelings for him; they burn just as hot, and drive you just as crazy as the first time.

“I miss you too,” you redirect sweetly. “I love you too. I’ve only loved you, I will only love you. I can’t love anyone else but you,” you confess, making him smile and lean in.

Yet just as you’re going to relish in the taste of his lips finally on yours, a knock raps on the door.

“Y/N?”

Eric?

Eric!

“What do you want?” You sneer and don’t bother to open the door right away.

“Ben is looking for you. He says it’s urgent.”

You groan and look at Jean one last time. “Let’s continue this later, hm?” You ask.

Jean sighs deeply and has no choice but to give in. “Fine. Just,” he trails off and slams his lips on yours to give you one quick but deep kiss before he pulls back to open the door for you.

“Hey man,” Eric greets Jean with a smug smile.

You storm out of the room and Eric follows after you.

“Why are you still mad, huh? Did I interrupt something?”

When you step out to the main cabin you stop in front of Ben and quickly interject. “What do you want?”

Ben looks away from Reiner and slowly looks at you with concern. “Do you have an extra pack of cigarettes? I left mine in my other coat.”

You clench your fist and give him a tightlipped smile. “That was urgent?” You say through gritted teeth.

Ben nods and glances at Jean sitting down before looking back at you and giving you a cheeky smile. “Yes.”

“I do not carry cigarettes because the last box you had me carry you finished last week. Am I done now?” You sneer. “Or?”

Ben glances at Eric sitting down next to him and they share a look before he nods. “Yeah.”

You let out a deep huff and turn to return to your seat. Jean tries to settle down next to you, but you quickly throw your arms over the empty seat. “Sorry, this seat is taken,” you let him know sweetly.

Jean turns and looks at you with a pointed look. “What do you mean? It’s empty,” he points out.

“It’s Honey’s seat,” you sass him. “She demands to have her own seat. Sorry.” You smile and point at the seat across from you “You can sit there. Mikasa is with Armin. And Eric—”

Just as you say his name your brother slides in the seat across from you as if trying to cockblock Jean from even looking at you.

“…is there,” you finish under your breath and then look back at Jean still baffled by your cat's privileges.

“You’re not serious,” Jean retorts.

“She’s so serious,” Eric rebuttals for you. “Her cat thinks it’s royalty or something. It’s weird.”

Jean glances at your brother and then at the empty seat, and is going to ignore you, but just as he’s going to sit down, your brown cat comes over and hops back on her seat next to yours. She sees Jean too close so she looks at him with her green eyes and lets out a long meow.

“See,” you exclaim with a smirk. “Her own seat. I don’t make the rules.” You shrug.

Jean rolls his eyes and picks up the cat, making her let out an annoyed meow.

“I bought you damn thing now hold it before I accidentally sit on it,” he sasses and plops the cat on your lap as you watch him sit down with bewilderment.

Over the past 2 years, you've been breaking your head wondering, and constantly asking Levi and the others to reveal who gifted you the cat, but no one would say a thing.

Sure sometimes you did think Jean was the one, but since he barely wrote you back he quickly fell off that list. For some time you thought it was Reiner since he seemed to still be fawning over you, but he would’ve said it, so your guess was Levi or Mikasa, but they never said a thing so you were left wondering for 2 years. And now you finally know, and you should’ve known.

“You got her for me?” You probe softly as you hold onto Honey.

Jean drifts his gaze to the corner of his eyes and looks at you as if it’s no big deal. “Yeah,” he responds nonchalantly. “Made Mikasa pick her out to give it to you.”

You scoff softly in disbelief and lean closer to him. “Why didn’t you say so?” You press him.

Jean shrugs. “I was. The cat is a…apology present for how I acted before you left, but then at the last minute,” he sighs. “I chickened out and thought it was better if you didn’t know until I saw you.”

Your heart skips a beat and your smile tugs to a grin before you quickly let go of the cat to lean over and throw your arms around Jean.

It's kind of an awkward hug since you're sitting side by side, but you still hold onto him.

“Thank you,” you whisper softly and gently run your fingers through the ends of his hair, making him shiver and squeeze you gently.

“I knew you'd like it,” he whispers in your ear as he tilts his head closer to you to draw in a small breath as he catches a whiff of your fragrance clinging to your skin. “You smell nice,” he shares.

You smirk and slide your hands down to feel his biceps hiding under his suit. “You do too,” you redirect smugly before you pull back and hug your cat again.

“You know,” Eric adds and taps the table in between you and him. “Back in the city, there’s this guy named Fedric, who is heads over heels for my sister here.”

“Eric,” you try to cut him off.

“No, no, just listen,” he ignores you and smirks. “He’s, like, tall, and buff and has crazy blue eyes. I’m telling her to give it a shot, but she refused. Maybe, you,” he points at Jean. “Can advise her otherwise, considering you’re her best friend.” He shrugs.

You glare at your brother and kick him in the shin under the table, he flinches, but he keeps on a straight face.

“Why don’t you date him,” Jean rebuttals sassily. “Considering the way you’re describing him.”

You snort and smile at your brother, but Eric doesn’t share the same enthusiasm, he fakes laughs instead and mutters. “Funny, funny.”

You snicker at him and then turn to continue talking to Jean. “I hope you got enough sleep—”

“Hey!” Connie cuts in and slides into the empty seat next to Eric. “Does your cat have a diamond hanging off her collar, or am I going crazy?”

You lift your cat and nod. “Yeah, she does. Isn’t she so pretty?” You smile.

Connie squints and then he bursts out laughing. “You’re so weird! It’s a cat!”

You roll your eyes and set your cat down on your lap. “So?” You quip. “What's your point?”

“My point is that it’s an animal,” he explains himself. “It’s weird that you put that shit on her.”

You don’t get his point nor do you want to spend your time arguing, so you drop the subject and return to what you didn’t finish saying. “Anyway! I hope you guys got enough sleep, you guys have a busy schedule today. Plus, a little welcome back celebration hosted by me.”

“What?” Connie gasps.

You smile proudly and nod. “Yeah, after you get finished with all your introduction meetings, we’ll go get ready, have dinner, and then go to a cantina. How fun is that?” You exclaim.

“It was supposed to be a surprise,” Eric mutters. “Mikasa is going to get annoyed.”

You flick your wrist to wave him off. “It’s okay. I planned it. I couldn’t hold it in! There’s gonna be dancing, music, old military friends, new friends we’ve made, and drinks. It’s gonna be fun! And who knows Connie, maybe finally you’ll become a man tonight.” You smile sweetly and bat your lashes.

Connie snickers. “Cherry girl, I am a man. I left many ladies crying back in Marley.”

You scrunch your nose in disgust as you don’t find this funny anymore. “That’s gross.”

“You started it,” he snaps.

You groan and glance over at Jean to ask if it’s the same for him, but you catch him already looking at you with a soft smile on his face that makes you wonder.

“What?” You query.

Jean blinks in surprise as he snaps from his stupor, but he doesn’t grow flustered, or lose his smile, he simply shakes his head and interjects softly. “Nothing. You’ve just changed, that's all.”

Your face begins to burn and you’re the one that grows flustered now. “Well,” you whisper. “Yeah.” You laugh and nod. “Yeah. And you don’t stutter anymore. You used to stutter. Is it all the practice back in Marley?” You tease him.

Jean scoffs and grows cocky. “Natural talent, that's all.”

You giggle and shake your head. “Natural talent my ass. I know you, you’re not as smooth as you think you are.”

“Am so,” he quips and tries to slide his hand around your seat's headrest, but his arm slips and falls on your shoulders. He quickly tries to recover but it was too late you proved your point.

“Super smooth,” you say sarcastically.

Jean shrugs and nudges your shoulder with his fingers hovering over it. “You like it.”

You can't help but smile as you look away. And the moment you do you catch both Connie and Eric watching Jean and you with disgust, so you ignore their negativity and just look out the window with a happy smile on your face.

Levi is still missing but you feel content, and your heart feels at ease with the rest of your family finally back home.

——

*LATER THAT NIGHT*

After a long day of waiting for Jean and the others to go through their long meetings, and after a short and kind of chaotic dinner you’re finally living through the part of the night you’ve looked forward to all day, considering you weren’t in their dreadful meetings.

You can’t say that you can party like when you were a soldier—it’s not that you don’t enjoy it, you just can’t bring yourself to get your mind too clouded just in case, but! You do enjoy the music and the vibe!

You just have to back away when Connie and your brother Eric try to force more wine down your throat.

“Jean can do it, I believe you,” you throw him under so he can take your place.

“Hey! Hey!” Connie exclaims and points his finger at you. “Those are not the rules. Coin flipped on you, you, drink!”

He's incredibly drunk.

“Hey, hey!” Eric cuts in and stands up. “You can’t force my sister to drink!” He exclaims and faces Connie with a pointed look.

“Whoa—”

“I can! Drink girl!” He shouts at you and swings his cup at you, causing Connie to burst out laughing.

“That’s what I'm talking about!” Connie exclaims and jumps up to throw his arm around Eric, making them both sway.

You roll your eyes but you still can’t help but smile softly over the fact that they’re getting along well.

However, you use this moment that they’re distracted to back away and escape before they keep pressing you to drink, leaving Jean to deal with them instead.

Sure there’s only so many places to hide in a small place, but you keep moving in between the crowd and actually catch Armin and Mikasa trying to dance along to the music. However, they’re tipsy so it’s not going well.

And luckily they don’t notice you so you keep moving along, but stop when you spot Reiner all by himself in some secluded corner of the cantina.

You haven’t talked to him since he got here, and you’ve been meaning to. You’ve been dreading it but you want to talk to him—should you though?

Yes! You’ve grown up, matured, pondered, and had three years to be upset! You need to make peace with this. He’s the last piece left.

So you walk over to him and casually sit beside him as you keep your eyes on Mikasa and Armin dancing.

“There’s a lot of pretty women out there,” you interject and smile proudly upon seeing your cousin's joy—“Why aren't you dancing? Do you have a girlfriend back in Marley?”

Reiner scoffs. “No,” he mutters. “I can’t seem to find the right one…” he trails off and you feel his stare on you. “You, do you have a…boyfriend?” He whispers hesitantly.

You shake your head. “No, but…” you sigh and glance at Jean, and catch him looking back at you. “…I have my eye on someone.”

You smile at Jean and look away to finally look at Reiner who hasn’t taken his eyes off you.

“Hm,” he hums and averts his gaze to clear his throat before he changes the subject. “Uh, how are you? I mean with everything. The reason why you left,” he says.

You let out a deep breath and shrug. “I’m…fine,” you hesitate to answer. “I’m not angry anymore,” you mention and continue because regardless of other things, he was still there. Once. But enough to motivate you to escape.

“I have nightmares here and there, they won’t go away. And sometimes…it crawls up on me, the fear that someone is around trying to get me…but,” you sigh and smile softly. “I’m okay now. I’m actually doing quite a lot with Historia and my brothers for the Underground. So I’m good.”

A small smile crawls on Reiner’s lips and he nods softly. “That’s good. I’m happy for you,” he says softly and averts his gaze.

“Thank you,” you whisper and shift in your seat to face him with determination to finally address the one thing that matters between him and you. “Reiner.”

Said man slowly meets your gaze and seems to look hopeful.

“I…can forgive you,” you jump straight to the point so he doesn’t get some false expectations about where this is going. “I can forgive you for taking away my best friend. I can forgive you for looking me in the eye all those times and lying to me, I can forgive you because I don’t want to hate you. Because I don’t want that in my heart anymore, but,” exhale deeply and look at him with a long frown. “I won’t forget. I’ll never forget what you did. And I know it might be stupid maybe, petty, but you still lied, and you still took him away from me. He was my best friend. I loved him,” your voice quivers. “And I…liked you, and it hurt.”

Reiner looks as if he was just shot, even though he expected you to say this, your words still wound him and finally make him realize that he and you will always live in the past.

“I’m sorry,” he mutters and scoots forward, making you raise your chin and nod in comprehension.

“Yes, I know you are and I forgive you. I can see us maybe being friends, but nothing else,” you admit the truth. “Do you understand?” You probe so he can get the right idea and not be delusional.

“I,” he breathes out heavily. “I understand.”

You offer him a kind smile and nod. “Good. That’s all I wanted to hear.”

Reiner looks away and quickly cuts in bluntly. “Do you love him?”

You blink in confusion and follow his line of gaze to see him looking at Jean walking over here.

“I…do,” you respond honestly and look back at Reiner curiously. “Why?” You ask.

Reiner snaps his eyes to you and leans forward to grab your hand and offer you a small smile. “Does he make you happy?” He asks.

You laugh softly. “We aren’t together at the moment, but, yes…why?” You probe.

Reiner draws in a deep breath and his smile falters. “That’s all I ask. That’s all I want for you. Even if it’s not with me.”

A pitiful frown tugs on your face. “Reiner,” you whisper.

Said man tugs his smile wider. “I’m happy for you, y/n. I really am. I hope you get everything you want out of life.”

You genuinely smile and nod. “You too, Reiner,” you redirect kindly. “You deserve it.”

Reiner breathes hitches and his smile falters, but he doesn’t break. Especially because Jean reaches the table.

“Sorry, Reiner but I need to talk to y/n,” Jean cuts in, making you let go of Reiner’s hand to twist around slowly and look at him with a quirked brow.

“Need to?” You inquire.

Jean meets your gaze and nods. “I’m not asking. Let’s go.”

Your heart skips a beat and you offer Reiner one last smile before you follow Jean outside.

“What is this about?” You probe without waiting to be away from all the noise. “Are you going to propose to me after our first day back together?” You tease and glance up at the sky, noticing the thick clouds that are quickly rolling in across the canvas, but missing the way he slowly steals a look at you.

“You know,” you add with a smile. “It’s good you didn’t have a girlfriend because I visit your mom often and have occasional lunches with her. It'd be weird.”

Jean scoffs softly. “Well it’s not really your fault, she loves you,” he reminds you of the fact. “She’d be nagging you and me if you didn’t visit.”

You look down at him and smile softly. Jean holds your gaze, and you grow the need to remind him how much you missed him even though the only time you’ve been apart since he’s gotten back was when he was in a meeting room. “I’ve missed you, Jean. I’ve missed talking to you. I…I’ve missed you.”

Jean’s lips curl to a smile. “I’ve missed you too,” he doesn’t hesitate to return to you. “Now come on, just a bit further.”

You shoot him a puzzled look but don’t question him, you just hook your arm around his, and enjoy the peace in the silence at this time of night. You relish in the moist smell of incoming rain and smile at the feeling of his surreal presence.

“You know I think Ben really likes me,” Jean interjects making you look back at him. “Eric though…I think I need to work on him.”

You giggle. “Why?” You mess with him. “We aren’t dating or anything.”

Jean stops, forcing you to do the same and look at him with a playful smirk.

“No? So what are we then?” He quips.

You shrug. “You tell me,” you counter sweetly.

Jean swallows thickly and glances down before he grabs your face and leans in to slam his lips on yours, causing you to gasp softly out of shock, even though you crave the taste of his lips.

He then pulls away to cut off this interaction, but you pull him back in to really remind yourself of the feeling of his soft lips that desperately fall in sync with yours before he takes control and leads you in for an open-mouth kiss, as if he had been starving.

Then again you can’t say you’re any different, you throw your hands around his neck and run them up to clutch onto his hair to keep his mouth on yours as you tease him for a moment, before you slide your tongue over his bottom lip for him to take it in and suck on it as his hands grab onto your face.

You try to make a sound, but he takes your breath away and all you can manage to do is pull away to catch your breath, making him lean in to press gentle kisses on the corner of your mouth.

“Jean,” you whisper between pants.

Said man pulls back and licks his lips as he holds your gaze with a darkened gaze full of lust. “What about now?” He rebuttals. “Do you know what we are now?”

You glance at his lips and smirk as you shrug again. “Tell me.”

Jean grabs your chin and tilts your head up so you can meet his gaze. “You’re mine,” he clarifies. “No amount of space or time ever changed that. Sure I was upset, but I was stupid, and now I know you leaving was for the best,” he admits. “Because look at you. I’m proud of you, my love.”

Your eyes water and your smile trembles as your heart fills with bliss.

“And I like to think I’m a better man too,” he continues. “I’ve grown, matured, and I’m finally ready for a commitment that I was not ready for then.”

You grin and he leans in to press a soft kiss on your forehead before he steps back and slides his hand down to grab yours and tug you with him. “Come,” he points up the road.

However, just as you take a step in that direction drops of rain begin to sprinkle down, making Jean stop and look up.

“We have to hurry,” he cuts in.

Alas, that sprinkle changes to a pour that makes Jean let your hand go and drop his head.

“What?” You quire and grab his arm. “What's wrong? It’s just rain.”

Jean slowly looks up and shakes his head with an annoyed look on his face. “No,” he argues. “I had this entire thing planned with the stars, flowers, and all the stuff you like, but it’s ruined now because of the rain!”

You glance up up but quickly look back down when rain falls in your eyes, and beam at Jean through the thick raindrops. “I like the rain! I like the sound, and I like the sight of it when the light reflects over it for a second before it hits the ground!” You assure him through the pattering. “So, it’s okay!”

You tug him to continue forward, but he doesn’t budge, instead, he stays there and you notice his lips are parted and he’s looking at you with a softened gaze that makes you confused.

“What?” You ask. “What’s wrong?”

Jean's smile wobbles before he blurts, “marry me!”

Your confusion falls and you gasp.

Jean continues to grab your hands and falls on one knee. “I-I know this is our first day back together, we have a lot to catch up on, but I don’t want to waste any more of my time without you,” he exclaims. “I love you. Deeply. I can’t imagine my life without you in it, actually, every time I picture my life, you’re in it. I want to spend the future we fought so hard for to be spent with you. Forever. So please…marry me,” he whispers.

You wipe the tears and the rain off your face, but it’s pointless because more tears and rain stream down your face, leaving you drenched. So you just proceed to throw yourself on him and cry on his shoulder out of pure joy your heart is oozing out.

“Yes,” you cry happily. “I do. I want to spend my life with you too! I want forever with you.” You pull back and grab his wet face, “I love you, Jean Kirstein. You are my sun, you are my moon and my stars. Without you, it’d be like living underground in the dark again. So yes, I want forever with you too.”

Tears mix with the rain on Jean's face and his smile turns to a wide grin before he seals your distance with a passionate kiss, assuring you both of your desires.

——

*15 YEARS LATER*

The air underground isn’t as thick and suffocating as it once was. That stench of moisture, piss, and dirt has somewhat disappeared—that or you’ve grown used to the smell after thirty years.

Then again you would have heard complaints by now if it reeked under here. They wouldn't have kept quiet about that.

Regardless, the darkness underground doesn’t lurk in every corner like before. The houses that once stood tall are left abandoned and only used for criminals and the homeless.

6 years ago thanks to Historia’s help, your brothers, and you were finally able to give everyone a better life they deserve, a chance to live a longer life and not be stuck underground because of greedy people who got your ancestors stuck down here in the first place. Now only criminals run their businesses down here in a crumbling abandoned society.

And the only reason you’re down here is because you want to show your children where you and Levi were born, and that life can be tough but you can move past it, like Levi and Furlan did with you and their lives. Sure your kids don’t like the idea of being down here in a dirty place, they’re used to the sun on their skin, the grass under their toes, and the wind unfurling over their flesh. All they grew up with was a life of full bellies, common colds under warm beds, and attainable medicine. Jean nor you ever let them know suffering.

“When are we leaving? Eirene is coming over today!” You hear your first complaint, and of course, it’s from your six-year-old daughter, Star. She’s just like Jean. Even if Levi says she’s Kenny’s twin, in both appearance and personality.

Which, you don’t know if you should be offended by that or not. He’s your father, but there were also many things wrong with him.

“Aunt Mikasa and your cousin Eirene are not coming over until way later,” you correct Star. “We’ll be back home by then, so,” you sigh. “Why don’t you come help your grandpa here, hm?”

Levi peers over at you with a side glare, so you counter with a smirk.

“Okay!” Star exclaims and leaves her father's side to run over and throw herself on Levi’s lap which is the opposite of what you wanted her to do.

“Girl,” you argue, “that’s not—”

“It’s okay,” Levi cuts you off. “She’s fine.”

“Yeah,” Star groans and lays her head back against Levi’s shoulder. “He’s too heavy, I can’t push him. My arms will break! They almost did so yesterday.”

Jean and you share a teasing look, and just as you're going to play along, someone else cuts in.

“That’s impossible! You can’t break your arms by pushing a wheelchair, isn’t that right, pa?”

Levi shrugs. “I don’t know Lucian, I saw it happen once. But I also saw someone’s hands fall off because they were lazy.”

Lucian, your ten-year-old snickers, whilst Star’s jaw drops.

“That’s impossible,” she argues this time with a pout. “Right…dad?” She peers over at the man walking by your side and her blue eyes fill with worry.

Yet he does a horrible job at consoling her in between his stifled laughs. “Yeah,” he assures her. “Not true…maybe.”

Star sees through his mask hiding his stifled laugh and glares at him before she turns around and hugs Levi’s neck.

“You need a better poker face,” you scold Jean. “You suck and I’m a bad liar.”

Jean clears his throat and shifts the baby in his arms to his other side to let his eyes fully take you in. “I didn’t start it.”

“Yeah and we both know she can’t take it,” you rebuttal.

Jean laughs at the ground before he looks at the baby on his hip to offer her a teasing smile.

“No one appreciates a good joke do they?” He talks to the 8-month-old baby watching him with her deep brown eyes wide-eyed, and full of curiosity. “Will you?” He asks and scratches her little chin, making her laugh.

You smile in awe and grab his arm to lean over towards your baby. “Is your daddy being mean to you, Marceline? Tickling your cute chins, hm?”

The baby coos and stretches her fat arms over to try and grab you, but Jean hugs her against him so you wouldn’t take his little girl from him.

Marceline squeals and pushes herself up to hook her arms around his neck, making Jean press a kiss on her tiny dark curls.

And it seems she knows the reaction she got and what it means because she snuggles her face in the crook of his neck like she tends to do when he gives her any kind of affection. She just loves Jean, even if he and you aren't her biological parents.

Actually, you adopted her not so long ago, six years after the doctor told you that having a third baby would kill you due to your weak immune system. That was actually the reason why you were left in a bad state for weeks after you had Star.

Jean said he didn't want to put your life at risk and live through his worst fear, so you opted for adopting a few months back. And albeit you did worry that she wouldn’t be able to bond with either of you because of the lack of blood connection, you were proven wrong; the three of you instantly connected, and Star and Lucian didn't fail to do the same. Albeit it did take Star some time to get used to her new sister…she…hated her for some time.

But now! She adores her, even if she gets jealous of all the attention the baby gets.

“That’s no fair,” you complain and hug your husband's arm. “She likes you better.”

Jean turns his head to drop his eyes on you and shakes his head with a smirk tugging on his lips nonetheless. “You know that’s not true...but, it’s probably true.”

You know well it’s all a joke, you just like to tease him like now as you roll your eyes, and he reacts by throwing his other arm around your shoulders to keep you at his side the closer you get to your destination.

“But,” Jean whispers. “You’re my favorite girl.”

You can’t help the smile that tugs on your lips, and your heart from skipping a beat. “Good save,” you retort and slide your arm around his waist. “Smooth.”

Jean chuckles lightly. “Always am.”

You giggle and pull away to skip ahead when you approach the rock. The special rock under the gap on the ground that welcomes the sun inside, that was once a shining hope for Levi, Furlan, Isabel, and you.

“We’re here,” you announce proudly and turn to face your family.

Star studies the area and when she sees nothing but dirt and a rock, she scrunches her nose in disgust. “Ew,” she groans.

“Star,” Lucian scolds her. “That’s not nice.”

Your daughter ignores her brother and interjects. “What is this?”

You spin around and rush over to climb on the rock, finding it easier to climb it than when you were a little girl.

“This!” You exclaim happily. “Is a window into my past when Levi and I lived down here.”

You proceed to look around and see that a part of the ceiling has caved in so the gap is more like a decline that lets you come and go outside as you please, and that lets the sunlight shine brighter inside than ever before.

“Why here?” Lucian asks out of genuine curiosity.

“Well,” you sigh. “Back when I was young, people who lived underground couldn’t just go above ground. We needed special permits to live up there. And a lot of people here didn’t have the money, or the right connections to get those, so the only piece we had of the outside world was through gaps. Just like this one.”

Lucian glances up at the gap, making his light brown eyes gleam because of the sun's beam casting inside.

“You’d be here too, Pa?” Star asks Levi.

“Hm,” he agrees and picks up Star to get off his chair and walk towards the rock. “Your mom would love coming here. So we tried to come every weekend.”

Star stares hard at the gap, and Lucian finally breaks away from his spot to climb on with you.

“Do you think Uncle Eric and Uncle Ben came here?” Lucian asks.

You shrug as you take a seat. “I don’t know. We’ll have to ask….what do you think of this?”

Lucian studies his surroundings and he’s not as brazen as Star, you can see the wheels behind his turning as he tries to figure out something nice to say.

“It’s not the best place, not what you’re used to,” you whisper. “But you see that?” You point at the puddle of water across the rock. “At night when the moonlight hits here, all the puddles glimmer, and in the spring, because of the rain, clovers, moss, and wildflowers sprout on the dirt under the gap, and on the rock. In the winter, snow collects inside and people would come to enjoy it even if it was cold.”

Lucian looks at you and flashes you a sweet smile. You grin at him and ruffle his light brown hair.

“I don’t get it,” Star interjects.

“There’s nothing to get,” Levi rebuttals.

Star groans and drops out of Levi’s arms to run to the decline and look up at the sky for a moment before she smiles and runs above ground.

“Sorry,” Jean says as if it’s his fault she doesn’t get the appeal, but you’re glad she doesn’t.

“Well,” Lucian struggles to say. “It’s nice.”

You laugh softly and without having to be told you point your head outside. “You can go too.”

Lucian's eyes widen with guilt, so you offer him an assuring smile. “Go,” you insist. “It’s okay. We’ll be out in a minute.”

Lucian grins at you and quickly slides off the rock to chase after his sister and leave this cave.

“Well I think Marceline likes it,” Jean interjects and stands at the side of the rock.

You look down and just as you’re going to comment, a distant cry breaks in the air, and you know it comes from Star, so Jean and you share a knowing look.

“I’ll go,” he says. “Take the baby.”

You drag yourself to the edge and reach down to take the baby from Jean’s arms.

“Mommy! Daddy!” Star cries out, making Jean shout back.

“I’m goin’!”

You watch Jean jog out of the cave, and lose his figure when he’s above ground. You keep quiet and wait until you don’t hear Star stop crying when Jean tends to her to look down at your baby girl.

“You like it?” You ask her.

Marceline blinks and then begins to gnaw on her own fist.

“Cute,” Levi deadpans.

You snort and look back at him, and catch him carefully climbing up to join your side and look up at the blue sky thousands of miles above you.

“They don’t get it,” he says softly.

You turn Marceline around and let out a soft sigh. “No,” you say. “But I’m glad they don’t…it means we did good…right?”

Levi slides his hands in his pockets and nods in agreement. “Yeah. You did.”

“We did,” you correct him. “You won this war too. We did good. They don’t have to find beauty in this cave to try and stay hopeful. We fought for that.”

Levi hums and peers are you. “Why did you ask if you already know the answer?” He asks with a small smile.

You shrug. “I just wanted your opinion, but I should’ve known better.” You laugh softly and watch the sun ray that shines over the rock, and catch a beautiful orange and black monarch butterfly flutter inside.

“Would you look at that?” You muse to Marceline.

The baby is obvious to the insect until it surprisingly lands on her arm and startles her.

“It’s okay,” you coo. “It won’t hurt you.”

Marceline begins to breathe heavily as her eyes stay trained on the butterfly, but then she abruptly reaches for it.

Luckily though you catch her arm before she can snatch the delicate creature. “Careful,” you warn her sweetly and with a laugh. “Gentle. You have to be kind,” you whisper. “Remember that?”

Marceline shrieks and scares the butterfly away. She doesn’t let that discourage her though and squeals as she leans over to try and capture the butterfly already too far from her grasp.

“It’s gone,” you tell her. “Why don’t you say goodbye, Hm? Goodbye, butterfly.”

Marceline stays quiet for a moment as her eyes follow the butterfly out of the cave. And only once it’s out does she begin to open and close her hand as she mumbles. “Buh-byyy.”

You giggle and nod. “Yes! Good!” You encourage her and look up at Levi with pride before you look back at your daughter as she keeps her hand out as she notices the sunlight dancing on her chubby fingers.

“That’s the sun,” you let her know and put your own palm out.

Marceline glances at the sun on your palm and slaps her hand against yours as if trying to capture it.

“No, silly,” you interject. “It’s the sunlight. You can’t get it. Trust me I’ve tried.”

Marceline studies her hand and slowly turns it before putting her palm over yours so the sun would kiss her hand again.

“Sunlight,” try to make her say it. “Sunlight.”

Marceline giggles and doesn’t dare move her hand so the sun can keep clinging onto her, making you look at her with pride, whilst Levi looks down at the both of you in awe.

This is all he wanted. For you to have a good life, to be happy.

You have that now and much more. He sees that every day and all he can feel is pride and awe for you. He feels grateful that you had a chance to have the world. And yes, it started a bit painful, you knew suffering for some time, but you have all he wanted you to have, love, a future, a legacy, pure joy, and hope and he’s grateful for that every day he sees you.

However, what brings the most pride is that he kept his promise to Kenny, and himself, he took care of you. And that’s why you are and will always be his favorite achievement. You are his pride, his joy, and his hope. Forever.

A/N- Thank you, thank you and thank you a hundred more times to everyone who came along in journey with me and supported this fanfic series!! I really hope you all liked the ending, and I will always be grateful to all of you!! I hope to keep seeing you all around!!

Tagged- @expectoscamander @greenygreenland @that-soft-lesbian-friend @dai-tsukki-desu @usernamehere91 @avocadopoosae @romancried @victor-criss-bish @moo-moo-meadow @stareatceiling @padfootii @ravensleepyeyes @thanosisadilf @dawneee @babyyblueey @leahseclipse @ifimnotabushimnoone @luvelyxp @ameliabs-world @dragon-master-kai

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m-jelly · 11 months

Note

Hii! I read you recent Hange request story and loved it! I was wondering if you could do a Hange x (female) reader where reader is feeling jealous that Hange is so invested in Pieck (because you know she's the jaw titan and Hange LOVES titans) and it makes reader feel kinda upset. Just something fluffy and sweet

Doubts

Pairing: fem!Hange x fem!Reader

Genre and tags: Canon, established couple, doubts, angst, slight jealousy, insecure reader, communication.

Concept: While camping out and staying safe from harm you've noticed that your girlfriend Hange seems to be all over Pieck. Doubt and worry fill your heart. At first, you are jealous but then the guilt starts to take over and finally the self-doubt and hate.

Doubt. Fear. Jealousy and sorrow.

Your mind and heart were a mess as you sat watching Hange with Pieck. Pieck was Hange's dream woman. Pieck was smart, beautiful, strong, sexy and she could become a titan. Pieck was so much more of a woman than you were in your eyes. Pieck was incredible and ever since she started helping the scouts, Hange was always at her side.

You pulled your gaze away when Armin called your name. You smiled at the young man and made your way over to him. "What can I do for you?"

Armin glanced over at Pieck and Hange. "Everything okay?"

You hummed in response because you didn't want to open up this emotional and painful box inside you. "I'm fine. What can I do for you?"

He stared at you for a while and read your expression. "Firewood."

You nodded. "Yeah, I'll go get more from where I usually get them. I'll be right back."

"You could take Hange, you know for a date?"

You grabbed what you needed and heaved a sigh. "She's busy."

Armin watched you walk away before approaching Hange. "Sorry for interrupting you both, but I need to speak with Hange."

Pieck sighed. "Good, I'm tired."

Hange pouted. "I just wanted to talk to you a bit more." She dragged her feet and walked with Armin. "What's up?"

Armin cleared his throat. "I don't mean to pry, but your girlfriend is in the woods getting firewood and she seems rather upset."

Hange was a bit perplexed by the information. "Upset? Why is she upset?"

"Possibly because since Pieck has joined us, you haven't spent a single moment with her and if you manage to you always talk about Pieck."

Hange stared at Armin as she slowly pieced everything together. "Oh...oh you're right...oh, my poor little pumpkin."

Armin pointed. "She went that way."

"Thanks, Armin!" She jogged into the woods until she saw you ahead. She slowed down and called your name. "Hey!"

You glanced back at her. "Why are you here?"

She came to a stop. "I came to help."

"I don't need help. I'm fine."

Hange shifted and stood in your path. "We need to talk."

You huffed. "I don't want to talk right now."

She pressed her finger between your eyebrows. "But you have a frown and a little raincloud above your adorable head."

You swatted her hand away. "I'm not in the mood for this silliness."

"Come on, my grumpy little pumpkin. We should talk."

You dumped the wood and turned to her. "I don't..." You huffed. "I just..." You hugged yourself. "Could you just be serious for a moment?"

"I'm all ears."

You sat down on a root. "Are you in love with Pieck?"

Hange stared at you. "What?"

"Are you in love with Pieck?"

She was in shock at first so she didn't reply right away, but when she registered your question she felt sad. "No, no I don't. I love you."

You put your head in your hands. "I just...she's better than me."

"In what way?" She moved closer to you and crouched in front of you. "In what possible way could she be better than you? You're funny, smart, strong, cute, beautiful and truly incredible."

You watched Hange take your hands in hers. "She's all that and more. She can become a titan and you love them."

Hange kissed your hands. "I am just fascinated as she's another titan shifter I can talk to. I don't love her at all. She's just someone I want to learn about Titans from. She's just an experiment really."

"But you're always with her and you talk about her all the time."

She sighed. "That's my bad. I let my excitement about titans get the better of me. You remember how I was with Eren."

You blushed a little when you felt silly. "Yeah, I remember you were all over him."

She covered your hands in kisses. "I'm sorry I made you feel like I didn't love you and that I was leaving you for another woman."

You let out a long sigh. "I'm sorry too. I got so jealous and then I started hating on myself. I should have just talked to you. Going quiet does no good. Not speaking to the people you love the most because you think it'll spare them pain is a bad choice. I only caused more pain. If I would have let this on longer, it would have festered and we would have fallen out and there would be no going back. I don't ever want to lose you. I love you more than anything, Hange. I promise I'll talk more about how I feel."

"I promise I'll talk more as well. I'll promise to take more time to be a couple with you. We're possibly facing death any day now. We have to make the most of the time we have." She leaned up and smiled. "Can I get a kiss?"

You nodded and kissed your girlfriend. "I love you."

"I love you too."

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situationzs · 5 months

Text

“ I don't want to live it if it ain't with her !! ”

💒 HER !! ;; eren jeager x fem!reader * social media au

synopsis — after erens one night stand with the mysterious girl at the party, by just one look he’s immediately hooked. “lust at first sight” as he said, now all he wants is more than just a day with her.

genre — nsfw-ish, fluff, slight angst, modern/college au, right person wrong time, kind of strangers to lovers/friends with benefits to lovers, uhh love at first sight.. (I think..) slow burn ish, crack-ish..

warnings; one sided pinging, sexual interaction/intercourse implied (probs mayb smut by a minor), cursing (obviously), kys/kms used to joke, writing from a beginner, english is NOT my first language, probs horrible grammar/spelling, reader is addressed as [name] bc I don’t like “y/n”

status — TBA (STILL A WIP START DATE NOT DECIDED)

taglist — OPEN!! < complete google form

“ you heard her, just one day eren ” || profiles (2)

dickriders — includes [name], hitch, pieck, annie, ymir

“zing” — includes eren, connie, jean, armin, mikasa

ᥫ᭡ — for chapters with written fic

I ,, TBA

II ,, TBA

III ,, TBA

IV ,, TBA

#situationzs #eren x reader #aot smau #eren smau #eren jeager x reader #eren jeager smau #eren yeager #eren yeager x reader #social media au #Spotify

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colossal-fallout · 1 year

Text

Crossroads

Porco x Reiner x Fem reader x ?

Warnings: Angst. Smut. 18+ Only. A/n: This is my first attempt at a longer story, one with a few chapters to it. Let's see how it goes. You're going to have to let me know if you want it to continue because if it's shit, I won't.

Song for chapter one: Hysteria - Muse

Synopsis: Although Porco has been attempting desperately to reach the hidden corners of his brothers memories, all he's managed so far is flashes from Ymir's mind. And some breath taking entity within them that's haunting him. You. And little do you both know, PATHS have been acting as a communication tower for the two of you but as of yet, you're not sure how...

Chapter I Yearn

With the golden hour pouring its tangerine glow into his room, Porco sat at his desk; legs splayed and elbows propped upon his knees. His tired back was arched as his fingers massaged his strained temples. It felt like the weight of the world rested on his shoulders and he carried it all alone. "Nothing..." He breathes, eyes closed. "I can't get anything from Marcel. Just that witch and her dumb memories."

"Keep trying, Pock." Pieck chirps from behind him, placing his forgotten lunch onto his desk as a reminder to eat. "He's in there somewhere."

"Yeah..." His voice cracks while he opens his now watering eyes.

He'd already lost his best friend, his confidant. His big brother.

His heart stung and beyond his own selfish desires he needed to access his brothers consciousness, one that was long gone from the physical realm.

"I waited for years." He mutters, mostly to himself - but Pieck listened in. She knew it was tough for him right now and Pieck Finger is always there for her brothers in arms.

"And he didn't come back. " His voice-box cracks a small laugh. "Not only did he not come back, he was killed before the mission even started. Know what that's like, Pieck?"

Her lips part as he turns his head slightly, the evident single tear trying to break the threshold of his pride.

"All that training, suffering... for what? To sacrifice himself for that oaf. He was too good for that squad, Pieck. Too damn good. And I would look up at the sky every night wondering if my brother was doing okay - and he was already long gone. What a fuckin' joke, huh?"

"Porco..." Pieck croaks. "It is what it is. It's war. I'm sorry."

"Yeah." Porco stretches his arms and cracks his neck by bending it side-to-side, turning back to hide his face from her. "That's war."

Pieck turns to leave; "Eat your food, Porco."

And she leaves.

The silence is deafening now he's alone with his thoughts.

What he wouldn't give just to hear his brothers voice again, to hear his laugh and words of wisdom. Marcel would know what to do. But Marcel isn't here.

With an exasperated sigh he lifts his hand to pick up his sandwich when -

Another flashback.

Marcel?!

...No. It's more of Ymir.

There's Reiner in that training ground. Pretending to be some great guy. What a fucking fraud.

And then...

Then -

All breath leaves his body. His heart skips a beat and his strained orbs enlarge as he sees someone standing there, laughing with Reiner.

The hair. The smile. The body...

That laugh.

He quickly snaps his eyes closed and jerks his head in surprise, the memory quickly leaving him.

What the hell was that?

Frowning, he places his hand over his chest that feels weirdly tight. His heart hammering against his chest and his breathing quivering.

A panic attack?

No, it felt too good to be anything negative like anxiety. But it was awfully similar. Good Anxiety? Is such a thing even possible?

But those eyes, he saw them clear as day. That laugh he heard as clear as a bell. And that aura...

She was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen in his life. In a short two second frame, you had taken his breath away.

There's no way... He shook his head again, gazing out of his window. Whoever that is, is using her dirty witchcraft for sure. Can they even put spells on people through memories? Is this just how Ymir saw her? Or is this just how she is?

No. He reminds himself. Ymir had a thing with that small blonde girl. It must just be how she is. I bet Reiner fell for her, hook line and sinker.

"Speak of the Devil." Porco mutters as the door opens and hears familiar heavy footsteps. "You must be here to ruin my day more, huh?"

Reiner meekly made his way into their shared room. Ever since he got back, it seemed his head was permanently hung in shame. Shame and guilt for failing his mission. And for getting two of his comrades killed and one taken as prisoner.

"Pieck asked me to make sure you're eating." Reiner replied with lowered vocals. "So, eat."

Porco ignored him as the large man made his way further into the room, sitting on his bed with a deep sigh.

"Hard day being a screw up?" He then decided to jab as Reiner pulled of his boots.

"Always."

"Hm." Porco hummed a small laugh, leaning back in his chair. "Must be exhausting, being such a disappointment. I mean, I wouldn't know."

Reiner didn't reply. He simply placed his boots neatly under his bed between his legs.

Reiner then began undoing his shirt, his solid chest and abs becoming uncovered triggered another flashback in front of Porco's eyes.

You again.

This time you were naked but your back was to him - well, Ymir. Some sort of changing room. Your skin looked satin soft as Ymir's gaze lingered over your bare back. Hair pulled to the side so the shape of your back was showing well. You look right at Ymir from over your shoulder, your eyes locking into hers, piercing them. Someone must have said something, it was inaudible to Porco but you laughed. He could hear that though. That sweet, laugh and gorgeous smile that just -

"Shit." Porco snapped himself back to the here and now.

Reiner looked at him with an arched brow.

"I keep getting Ymir's memories." Porco then explained standing up to stretch his legs. "There's someone I keep seeing. Some witch or something. She's... well to be frank, beautiful."

Reiner freezes, his shirt in his hand - eyes staring dead ahead as if the sands of time decided to petrify him in place.

" <hair colour> hair... <eye colour> eyes... "

He eyes Reiner as he is still frozen, his own heart now hammering.

"A laugh that sounds like a bird singing or something." Porco shrugs.

"I couldn't tell you." Reiner lied, resuming his task of folding.

"Oh yeah?" Porco sneered. "Because there's a few memories in here and a lot of them are you two together."

"I was with a lot of people."

Porco stood with one hand in his trouser pocket and the other he swings casually to Reiner's face, touching his skin with the side of his index finger. Before Reiner could even flinch Porco was seeing more.

An argument between Ymir and Reiner at some point. Reiner training with Beartoldt. Reiner with that gorgeous island devil... holding hands?! Ymir is ripping them for it, having stumbled into their private time.

"Yeah right." Porco scoffs.

"Don't." Reiner warns, now also getting to his feet.

"Or what? What are you gonna do, Reiner?"

Reiner's lip twitches into a snarl for a second before he regains composure.

"Thought so." Porco spits with venom before stepping towards the door. "You were there playing house while we're waiting for you to do your damn job!"

"It wasn't like that!" Reiner yelled back.

"Save it for someone who gives a shit." Porco hisses before stepping out and slamming the door behind him.

Reiner flops back onto his bed, arm covering his eyes. It was hard enough leaving you behind and lying to you. And oh how he missed you. And now, you hated him. You hated what he was and how he deceived you. But there was no other way. He fell for you, simple as that.

Porco leaned his back against the other side of the solid wood door, chin in the air and eyes clasped shut. You certainly were a witch because you had him enchanted.

More flashes of you kept popping up from nowhere, some of them lasting a few minutes hearing full conversations with you. It was driving him insane. After a while it felt as though he knew you on a personal level. And after he discovered it wasn't really like this for others, he concluded you were something special. And not this evil devil as he'd expected either. He witnessed kindness. A good sense of humour. He would even have such vivid dreams about you it felt as though you were both spending actual time together.

It came and went. Some days he didn't see you at all. Others he would be seeing you all day.

It had gotten to the point that Porco had awoken from a dream. Another dream where the two of you were just sitting and talking. Laughing. His eyes were greeted with a dark room, his ears with the soft snores of Reiner in the bed across the room.

His heart hurt.

He was in love with someone from a memory.

And he knew Reiner still loved you - he wouldn't talk about it or about anyone but Porco knew. How he'd freeze up and sometimes even blush whenever your name was mentioned out of curiosity. All Porco wanted to do was talk about you, find out what you were like. But there was no chance of that happening without raising suspicions.

His bare chest gently swelled and fell with his breathing as he stared at the ceiling thinking about you. He'd never been in love before. He'd never even really felt lust before - he'd always been far too busy for such things.

And yet as he lay there flicking through Ymir's memories like some cheap porno magazine to see you naked again, his feral need for you far outweighed the shame of what he was about to do.

His fat cock was solid underneath his sheet, pulsing as he grasped it with a fist trying to calm himself. But as his eyes closed and lips parted a deep gasp escaped him as he began to slowly stroke his head. Fuck. She's so perfect. Those beautiful tits... that face - I just wanna ruin it. Make that pretty face cry with my dick...

He tried to control his breathing as to not wake up his roommate; his free hand gripping his sheets, clawing at them from how good it felt to imagine your pretty little lips around him. Thinking of the things he would do to you. He paced himself, keeping his strokes slow while his fingers now ran through his hair. His nose sniffed as he tried to keep his composure picturing your tongue flat out for him, ready for his load.

"your name..." He grunts, his heavy breathing quivering as he fought his own body for control. "Fuck, your name..."

He'd never felt the need to masturbate over a real person before; usually just using his imagination and conjuring up women or thinking of something from a dirty drawing he saw once hanging up outside of a gentlemen's club.

His arm moves faster, the joy of his pleasure quickly escalating. Those hips... Nurgh those lips... her hair... I remember feeling her skin...s-so soft...

He imagines you riding him, your breasts bouncing as you swivel and grind against him, imagining how you'd smell, how you'd taste.

"Fuck, your name, your name..." He bites his bottom lip hard as his muscle spasms and vomits its thick cream, his loud hiss a lot more volume on it that intended.

The bedside lamp flicks on, illuminating the room.

Reiner is on his side, squinting through the light at Porco, who freezes. He see's his hand down under the sheet and the cherry hue across his nose and cheeks, eyes like a Deer in headlights looking over at him.

"Porco, what the f -"

"Turn the light off you pervert!"

"What name were you saying?!"

"What?"

"What. name. were. you. saying?"

Reiner sat up, eyes slowly adjusting to the light.

Porco smirked. Whether he was feeling confident from his recent dopamine hit or because he loved you too much to care...

"your name."

Reiner's jaw tensed.

Porco tapped a finger to his head.

"Yeah I see her. I see her every night. I can't help it, it just happens. And she looks so good. How did she feel, Reiner? In your arms?"

Tears stung Reiner's honied eyes. "Perfect."

Porco let out a deep sigh, lowering his head back down onto the pillow. "Yeah? I thought as much."

They both jumped in horror as their bedroom door was kicked open by a big boot. Reiner stood up in his underwear, Porco followed, hastily holding his sheet against his naked stomach.

"Wake up girls!" Magath roared as he stepped in. "Looks like I've interrupted your little slumber party."

"No sir!" Reiner chanted.

"Good, because guess what? You're gonna be packing your bags. We're off to Paradis!"

End of Chapter I

#snk fandom #snk reiner #porco galliard #porco #aot porco #attack on titan porco #reiner braun #snk reiner braun #shingeki no kyojin reiner #attack on titan reiner #reiner x reader #porco snk

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24hlevi · 1 year

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Congrats on 1.7k! If it’s okay, can I request Pieck and Angst 8 - Injury? Maybe perhaps a little bit of fluff 4 on the side? We all deserve some Pieck love in these trying times

oh. my. god. i love pieck so much. i miss aot thank god it's came back yesterday night & later this year. thank you so so much for requesting this 🫶

— love war

pieck finger (attack on titan) x gn!reader

genre: fluff

summary: angst prompt 8(injury) and fluff prompt 4(first kiss) from my 1,700 follower event

warnings: language, typical aot violence

the day marley declared war on paradis island was surely a day everyone would remember. with the way eren jeager rose from beneath the stage in his full titan glory, it was almost as if marley finally would understand how the "devils of paradis" felt when they attacked first. the chaos all erupted so fast hardly anyone had any time to react before eren began fighting the warhammer titan. believing on marely territory they would win the battle, but they only ended up getting beaten to a pulp by the scouts of paradis with no help whatsoever from anyone else. that meant using all the titans to fight against eren, including the girl you were in love with, the warrior that was pieck. and nothing could have prepared you for what was bound to happen.

"gabi! falco! stay close with me!" you yelled to the two kids, running around on the cement while looking around at all the fighting happening above and around you. "shit, shit, shit!" you cursed, continuing to run.

the two preteens ran behind you, gabi with a rifle in her hands and falco trying to keep his head straight instead of looking all around like you were. thankfully, you were also equipped with a rifle you stole off a body, running while hearing the screams of civilians as the three of you ran towards the fight instead of the opposite way where everyone else was going. your knuckles were turning white from how tightly you were gripping the gun in your hands as your hair began to stick to your forehead from sweat building up on your skin. you couldn't believe this was happening. the people of paradis had attached on marely territory, meaning they had no fear of them having more titans, more military, more strength.

"y/n! where are we even going?!" falco yelled over the commotion around you all.

"we have to help the warriors!" you yelled in response, turning the corner and seeing the fight from the little alleyway you three were at. "damn it," you cursed under your breath.

gabi and falco were staring at the fight with wide eyes, in shock when you heard screaming from above, making your head shoot up at the rooftop above you, seeing fire and your eyes widened quickly.

"pieck!" you exclaimed, seeing the woman's titan fall from the rooftop as falco and gabi followed your eyes and yelled after you.

you quickly ran up to the titan as captain magath found gabi and falco, checking on them first before cocking his own rifle and firing up at the scouts from above who tried shooting down at pieck. when the girl emerged from the nape of the titan, all of the color in your face drained upon seeing her.

"pieck! we have to get you out of here!" you told her, hooking your rifle over your shoulder and wrapping your arms around her waist to pull her up and out.

"you need..to run," pieck said to you, looking up as the others shot at the scouts on the roofs.

"we're not leaving you!" you exclaimed, pulling her out of the titan and tightly holding onto her, "you're gonna be alright, i swear."

"don't shoot! please!" you heard falco yell behind you, causing you to turn your head and see a scout come at you with some sort of long weapon in his hands.

covering pieck with your body, the steam from pulling her out released and the scout missed the shot, making you let out a sigh of relief before jumping down with pieck still in your arms. "falco! gabi! get in a building now!" you yelled at the two kids.

both quickly nodded, about to run into the building before seeing zeke collapse in front of them. all of your eyes went wide at seeing the beast titan fallen, catching a glimpse of a scout landing on him and tossing a grenade onto the nape of zeke's neck. "get inside!" you told the kids, making them quickly run into the nearest building and hide inside.

captain magath had followed you four, telling you to watch pieck while he stayed with the two kids. you laid pieck down on the wooden floor, seeing the blood which made you worry if she would heal fast enough, not realizing how evident it was on your face until she spoke.

"it's okay...i'll be fine," she told you quietly.

"i know, i know. i'm still going to worry, though," you responded, sitting down next to her, trying to ignore the fighting outside.

a light chuckle came from pieck, making you turn your head and look at her confused. "you worrying about me? that's new."

"i always worry about you," you mumbled under your breath, assuming she wouldn't hear.

suddenly, you felt her hand grab ahold of yours, making you look over at her confused again only to see her smiling.

"always? that's definitely new. but why?" pieck said, tilting her head to the side. "if i'm about to die i would rather know now than never."

now you looked at her with light shock. knowing you had just accidentally tossed yourself deeper into this hole, you bit down on your tongue before sighing, using your other hand to grab onto hers before answering. "because i love you. i have since we were kids and we were warrior candidates but when you got picked and i was sent to be in the marely army, i gave up. i figured there was no way a warrior would want to be with someone normal in the military. but, the reality is that i was never able to forget you. so i rose in the ranks as much as i could so i could be on the battlefield with you. even if i could easily get killed, just being in the same presence with you was enough for me." you explained, looking down at the ground to avoid eye contact with her.

when you finally looked at pieck after a few seconds of silence, you were surprised to see her suddenly sitting up beside you. her grip on your hands tightened slightly and she smiled at you.

"well, if i had known that a while ago then i'm sure you would've figured out i feel the same," pieck said to you with a small smile.

now you looked at the girl confused, not wanting to believe what you heard. "you wha-"

you were cut off of your sentence by pieck leaning in and pressing a soft kiss onto your lips, resulting in your eyes going wide whilst kissing back a split second after you realized what was happening. when the two of you pulled away, you smiled at her brightly and pieck chuckled, patting your shoulder.

"don't get too excited, now. we still might not survive this," she told you.

"yeah, but at least if i die, i would die happily," you replied with a smile, your hand still holding onto hers.

"so cheesy," pieck gently pushed you, "are you gonna be like that now?"

"oh for sure, i've been holding it in for too long," you laughed lightly.

"great."

suddenly, you two heard someone clear their throat, and when you both looked over you saw both gabi and falco staring at you two with wide eyes like they had just seen a ghost.

"what was THAT?!"

"i don't know!"

"y/n and pieck LIKE EACH OTHER?!"

"APPARENTLY!"

the kids went back and forth bickering with each other, making you sigh from annoyance before pieck gently squeezed your hand, and you looked back over at her.

"let them have their moment, it'll only get worse with the teasing later," she said to you, leaning her head on your shoulder.

"good point," you grumbled under your breath.

"hey, y/n?" pieck whispered quietly.

"hm?" you hummed back.

"do you think maybe that, we're the devils and not the people of paradis island?" she asked.

"honestly...yeah. we fucked up. this is our punishment now."

"yeah, i guess you're right. even if we're eldians." she sighed, closing her eyes.

"yeah, but as long as i got you i think we'll be okay."

"cheesy, again."

"you love me, though."

"...i do."

#attack on titan x reader #aot x reader #shingkei no kyojin x reader #snk x reader #attack on titan imagine #aot imagines #shingkei no kyojin imagines #snk imagine #attack on titan scenarios #aot scenarios #shingkei no kyojin scenarios #snk scenarios #pieck finger x reader #pieck x reader #pieck imagine #pieck scenarios #request #1700 follower event

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keischreiber · 4 months

Text

The Things We Don't Say

◆ Pairings: Reiner Braun x Reader ◆ Word count: 1,635 ◆ Contains: Angst ◆ Additionally: SFW; This hasn't been proofread.

◆ Synopsis: ... it felt like sin to keep staying this way.

"You're... here again." He said, an ounce of comfort could be heard in his voice.

He's been here for as long as he can remember. Sterile walls were all he knew, along with the silence that came with it. Sometimes, he would be entertained when engaged by the medics with small talk... however, he could hardly remember what it was that they were talking about in the first place.

He'd catch bits and pieces from time to time, but nothing gets retained permanently. Reiner wished that he did, so that he could hold better conversations rather than simply nodding or looking apologetic when someone brought up something that he should know, only to be disappointed with his lack of knowledge about them.

The most frustrating thing about the entire thing was perhaps, deep down, he knew that wheat he no longer knew had been important. He could tell when the visitors who claimed to be his 'friends' looked at each other, only to look back at him as if they had done something wrong. They'd often apologize, saying that they shouldn't have pushed too much for him to remember; but he had never once felt the need to get mad at them for it.

After all, he hoped they'd simply keep on talking, then maybe he could remember something other than just his name...

... and sometimes, even that escapes him.

However...

"What, you getting tired of my face already?"

... there was always one person who came on a daily basis. For as long as he could remember, they've never missed a day. For the majority of the time, they were simply silent. They'd tend to the little things that could have been taken care of by the nurses on duty. And even if one came and they were around, they'd simply thank the medic while still helping out. He remembers because they do this every day.

Every day, they'd bring him something to eat. Warm, comforting, easy to consume; something that increased his appetite compared to the hospital food that he had gotten accustomed to. These daily meals, he looked forward to and he couldn't even bring himself to understand why. Sometimes, they'd bring him something sweet too, hard candies. They explained that if he suddenly gets a headache out of nowhere, he should eat one and it'll make him feel better. Most of the time, it did.

They never really spoke much about themselves; often preferring to stay silent while sitting by his bedside.

"N-no. I'm... sorry if I sounded like I didn't want you around just now."

Reiner couldn't help but apologize. Always, he'd expect that they'd take offense with him, but they never did. Always just an understanding smile, and a few words like 'it's alright' or something similar, and then nothing more.

Today as well, it's the same thing. They've been bringing a book with them lately, and simply read silently beside him. Reiner, who didn't know what sort of conversation to start, simply watched them in silence as he laid in bed, tucked beneath a warm blanket— an additional layer to his usual pristine white sheets. It's been getting colder lately. Maybe that's why they brought it for him.

As he studied his quiet visitor, he couldn't help but notice how visibly thinner they seemed. He didn't know why he noticed it just now, but perhaps it was because they were always around; worse, maybe it was just because he couldn't remember. They also looked drained... more tired than usual.

He wanted to say something, anything, but in the end... he couldn't.

For a moment, he can't help but feel pathetic not even remembering their name. It's not as if he hadn't asked. They simply never give it.

Reiner had a little notebook, you see, where he lists down the names of those who visit him.

Jean Kirstein

Connie Springer

Mikasa Ackerman

Armin Arlert

Annie Leonhart

Pieck Finger

Gabi Braun

Falco Grice

Historia Reiss

He even wrote his mother's name, "Karina", just so he'd never forget.

In front of his notebook was his name, something that admittedly, was something that he hadn't written. Somehow, at some point, he felt like there was no need to remember... but it was them, they wrote it down for him.

Behind that cover page, was a small note that he looks at every day after he wakes up... every night before he sleeps.

— You're worth every thought.

Despite the silence, there was something oddly relaxing about their presence. Sometimes, when they catch him staring, they'd hide their face in their book. Reiner would blink slightly and before long, would realize that he'd already have chuckled at them. The red on their cheeks would catch his interest, but he never pursued any more than that... for their comfort.

Hours would pass like this up until the time when they have to leave.

There would be instances where he'd drift off by accident, and when he awakens they'd no longer be there. Today however, was a little different.

"Are you leaving?"

They were caught off guard when Reiner spoke, but despite that, simply wore a smile and nodded.

"I have to, for today."

Came the response. For them, it was easier to leave when he was asleep.

"Say," As they stood, Reiner sat himself up. "Can't you tell me your name?"

"I... maybe another time." And they moved with the speed of a guilty man, one that Reiner couldn't understand. Something that, in fact, he didn't want to. Why did he have to wait for the next time that he knew would surely not come. If they wanted to introduce themselves, they'd have done it a long time ago.

Just as his guest reached the door, Reiner was following suit, ready to stop them to get his answers.

"Wait! Don't go!"

But before he could catch them, they had already made their exit, shutting the door behind them on their way out.

Just as he was about to slam his fist on the door, there was a soft thud that came from outside, as if something collided with the door.

They didn't leave...? He thought to himself. "Why... won't you say anything?"

Despite his voice being loud enough, he was met with silence; one that made him press his forehead against the door.

Unbeknownst to him, the person on the other side had done the same. Separated between a slab of wood... so near but felt like they were seas apart.

"There's a girl who visits me here... made my heart race the first few times. I would’a married her at any given time, at any given place. That's what crossed my mind at first... but it's not the same... not the same as... whatever this is!"

He didn't know what he was saying; his mind all muddled and confused, trying to pump out reasons to get the person on the other side of the door to talk.

"...But it's different with you." He felt frantic. "You make my pulse race in a different way. If I couldn't remember her name, it felt awful... much like when I can't remember the others. But not being able to remember you..."

They could hear Reiner getting choked up on the other side.

"... feels wrong." It eats him up inside. Whenever he stared at them, he felt his gut wrenching as if he was neck-deep in sin. It felt wrong, felt devastating... felt like a part of him was repeatedly being ripped out of his chest again, and again, and again.

"Did you mean something to me, did I love you?" At this point, he just wanted to say everything that came into his mind before they disappeared. "Because it feels like I do..."

"You were the one that wrote it, weren't you? You're worth every thought." He repeated the words that he woke and slept to every single day.

"Please... can't you tell me what you are to me? Let me think about you, let me remember you. Please..." He'd have burst out of that room if he could, however, he was afraid that they'd run away from him if he did.

"I'm—" When Reiner heard the faint sound of their voice, silence ruled for a few good moments. He was trying to catch any sound that he could. Anything at all.

On their end, they had been sobbing. Holding a hand to their mouth to muffle the sound as they listened to his plea. A name should have been the easiest thing to give, yet for them, it became the hardest.

After all there was guilt attached to the name.

How could they make Reiner remember... that the reason he was here in the first place was because of them. Having saved them led to him being here in the first place... with both of them having almost died in the process.

Hearing him cry on the other side of the door made them wonder if they were being selfish about the matter. Reiner was bawling on the other side, pleading when there hadn't been a need to beg in the first place.

It wasn't long before the handle turned and the door would open again. Both of them were a mess.

"I'm..."

Their voice was meek, the words choked up. But the moment Reiner had heard their name, he pulled them without so much as a single thought, wrapping his arms around them tightly, the door being shut tight behind them.

It wasn't as if hearing their name made him remember. But more so, the instincts of his body simply kicked in.

A different feeling from that girl he thought he wanted to marry...

A different feeling from long time friends visiting...

... but simply a feeling that his heart automatically knew meant the world to him.

#◆ Drabbles and Fictions #reiner x reader #reiner x y/n #reiner x oc #reiner x you #aot #sfw #Eeeeey~ look. It's my first fic on here~#Feel free to reblog if you'd like #this be everyone-coded #Hi.#Do you want to cry with me?

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