#please consider joyning!

[kittyscurvycorner]

Shame-Free Fitness Resources

This is a post I added to a reblog from someone who was looking for inclusive fitness options that won't stigmatize them based on their bodies. I am adding and refining what I originally put in that post.

I, personally, have been on a journey to find genuinely body positive, anti-diet exercise channels for a while now. Please note, the costs of classes below will vary, but many of them will do a trial class or have at least some free content up on youtube or instagram. I really do encourage financially supporting people who do this work if you can!

If you're into instagram, I definitely recommend following the instructors over there and reading their posts as well, especially if you're interested in shifting your mindset regarding exercise. I know instagram and social media has a reputation for being toxic to your mind and self-image, but if you really curate your feed and intentionally follow people who are putting out body positive and anti-diet messaging it might be actually helpful instead (at least, it is for me!)

General Fitness/Providers with a variety of classes

Joyn I don’t have as much experience with them, but they are a Youtube channel specifically dedicated to joyful, body inclusive movement, they have a variety of videos from yoga to pilates to dance classes and more. There are some seated options.

Fitragamuffin is specifically non-diet, non-weight loss though may not be accessible seated. I really like her instagram, and her affirmations and mentality towards exercising has really helped me

Enlightenwell is also specifically non-diet, and non-weight loss. She has a variety of videos available and can also work one-on-one. There are at least a couple seated classes.

Specific Classes (non-yoga):

Body Positive Barre is my personal favourite instructor to follow along with, partially because I really enjoy barre apparently! She has all virtual classes and does First Class Free so you can try it out. Some seated classes available.

Yoga Instructors

Tiffany Crow does mostly yoga flow, some seated/chair options, definitely body positive.

Fringeish is another mostly yoga channel, they have a lot of options for modifications.

The Underbelly virtual yoga, comes with a 2-week free trial. I follow Jessamyn on instagram and enjoy her content.

Dianne Bondy is not someone that I have experience with firsthand, but she was linked by Meg Boggs who I've followed for a while now. I want to try out her core strength video.

Nourished Natasha is someone I've followed for a while and I enjoy her gentle, affirming style of delivery. I will admit, her aesthetic also draws me in personally.

Reyna Cohen is another yoga instructor who I follow and I've personally done some of her flows and enjoyed them.

Other Resources

I have the book Plus Size Knee Pain Solutions (formerly known as Easy Fitness for the Reluctant Exerciser). It’s not just for knee pain, it’s more like a how-to on starting from the ground up with exercise, doing a little bit every day, finding what works for your body and developing a new mentality towards movement. I didn’t actually finish the whole thing, but the exercises I did start from seated and give seated options.

I also have the e-book Weightless by Maggie McGill (full disclosure, I won it in an instagram giveaway so i did not spend money) it’s got a personal touch, encourages considering your relationship to the concept of exercise. It helped me with the idea of how exercise interacts with life and recognizing that what works in one season might not work as well when we get busy or have other stuff going on.

Superfit Hero makes really good plus size workout pants, I also did win them in the giveaway, but finding workout gear that actually fits fat bodies can be just another damn challenge to trying to move and exercise more. It’s rare that brands cater to larger bodies, and this one does.

Meg Boggs is a blogger and author who writes a lot about size inclusive fitness. Another person I mainly follow on instagram, I find her content delightful.

Overall, like, it can be very difficult hard to find good exercise resources while avoiding weight loss talk like the plague. I personally won’t settle for people/channels/resources who “only mention it a little bit”.

However, this list is not exhaustive at all. This stuff does exist out there- it's frustrating that it can be hard to find, but it's been worth it to me to find them and follow them for sure,

I hope this list helps literally even one person! If you’re not interested in the type of exercise any of the above links, I’d recommend maybe even looking at the individual’s instagrams and seeing other people they interact with might, it could lead you to something more genuinely body inclusive than the mainstream?

#size inclusive fitness #size inclusive exercise

[irafook]

I'm was invited to be a Guest Artist for @castlevaniazine ♡

#ira's on a zine #I'm still floored at this invite #such a happy surprise #Castlevania aesthetics are so cool this zine will be gorgeous #apps close tomorrow #please consider joyning! #castlevania #alucard tepes #trevor belmont #sypha belnades

[libidomechanica]

Untitled # 7581

last stopping his  powring one childe to  shrewd turns up more to  be true old woman  Never uttered at vast advanced,  and the street,  And thy power is  the bride. with  whom Joves isle and  huge hall-door, who possess  and light that practice  but weak, but what  no Considerings oppress  with this; she  rather form,  and a hey nonino, that  is a moon showers  do sturdy Cymon wits  despise. Thus explaine; whether  is purpose nothing  look, myself, which Juan  not imagine a  devil and bended for  all the grave,  and me: his head I  writhing with  darts be gone, then althought,  and speak first invention  may be, I never  sure I my undoing much  is light. For thou  flatter wound among they  forms and thump a leaguerd  Hand, now step upon tranquility:  full oft he present,  then with  a hey, and  straight that when  I asked like smoked superious,  and if their  Gods were gathers breath tonight,  Will  beauty beauty morn by my successfull  Youth; and liuing dying.  a cloudless marble in  anothers blood. For  prating was  found, or because  exposd the  needs must tell by the  topic die. Though I  despair; that I was  combination, so  they fall like thats half whatsoeer  there no longer heere about  his Memory did  early rise and strips  our destiny  both of ninety year old  black eunuch made him well:  and maist thou art thou art;  wild horn in the  least-wise she lovd you know not  what Natures; and  after a life, and all,  and drown as “t were  randome bough, by Jove, a  noble Stile he might makes  their own according to  thee, yearning, but wisely  Joyn, (the bearing from  the law of  nation), a poniard  did inviting, earth and  fight retired,  above ground: the  Peoples please; bankrupt of  Life it bitter then  unknown each by separable— ‘ wretched these dread, who rowd  all eyes blend, his golden  grain entrusted in the  Empire of  senceles tree.) You think with  tempt to  live in vain; turnd by  mistake. Face, these unhappy  am I! Shall be  cut it seemd but silence.’”

#poetry #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Markov chains #Markov chain length: 6 #144 texts

[malockser]

~ When i come back  ~ (Gruvia One-shot)

So, since i didn't draw anything yet for the final chapter of Fairy Tail i decided to write this One-Shot about how Juvia would react when Gray tell that Team Natsu are going to the 100 years mission, and how it can end on a fight between then for some conflicts.

If you want to see the continuation please tell me ;)

Well it’s a very fluff anyway ;)  

I have to admit that i don't like very much when the manga foccus totally on the protagonists, but i wanted to write it after all XD

Enjoy ~

MaLockser / AnimeTopArts

Gray POV

- I understand, well you all are S class mages now, so i can't see any problem. - Master said to our Team. After a year since the end of the alvarez war Master considered our level enough for becoming S class. Of course that it wasn't just for us.

- So we will all leave next week, so prepared your things, we don't know how many time it will take. - erza instructs us.

- Man i am hungry - Natsu immediatelly said. - Hey Lucy let's

- No, you two won't eat in my home again !!! - She exclaims pointing at the pink haired Dragon Slayer and Happy

- Come on Lucy we won't destroy the things again. - Natsu hugs Lucy trying to convince her.

- N-No that won't work again !!

- Don't be so mean to your boy Lucy - I say to her.

- HA ?! He is not- She blushes - And who is you to talk ???

Damn it

- What's the problem ? You didn't said to her yet ? - Natsu asked with a interrogative face.

- He's probably searching for a way to say to her without worry her. - Erza enters on the chat

- Well it's not easy to say to Juvia that i am going on a mission impossible that i don't know when we will came back, mainly if my girlfriend can flood all the cit- I stop talking when i really when i realized what i just said. - I-I mean-

- HA !! You finally admited that she's is your girlfriend !!! - Natsu laughed and pointed to me.

- It was time - Lucy said joyning to Natsu and Happy to tease me and the three was whistling and yelling "Gray liiiiikes Juvia !!!!!"

- Yes, our Gray was growed finally. - Erza was saying with a proud face as she was my mother.

- Your...- I tremblered angry

They just looked at me:

- SHUT UP YOUR DAMN MOUTHS !!!!! - I scream and they just ran away while laughing. TCH !  

- Gray-sama ? - I hear the voice of the girl that we was talking talking in the begining

- J-Juvia - I turn at her slowly tremblering  

She was with a confused face at my reaction. - Something happened ??

- N-No, then what you want to say ?

Her eyes shined while she joined her hands:

- Juvia wanted to go out somewhere with Gray-sama !!

- I'm sorry but i am tired  today. - I apologize but she seemed disappointed.

- Oh Juvia understands...

-*puts a hand on her head* I really wanted to go out with you, but i really have to rest, i have something important to do next week.  

- T-Then can Juvia made your dinner ? - Juvia whispered pocking her fingers and looking at her feets. This girl is incredible, she never give up, i think that's why i falled for Juvia that much. - You don't need if you don't wan-

- It's fine for me.

- Really ?? - She exclaimed hopefully

- Yeah, of course, it's not like i will run or something. So, do you want to go now ??

- Yes !! - We walked at my house as Juvia held my hand, i wasn't fully confortable to showing affection in public but i was getting used to her actions  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the dinner we sitted in my couch and started talking like we used to do when we was living together.

- Thank you Juvia. - I held her hand, making she surprised.

- About what ?

- About the dinner, you always cook my favorite food when you come here...

- Haha it's just Juvia likes to cook to Gray-sama and make him happy.

- You know you don't need do that all for making me happy. Just being by my side makes me really happy Juvia. - I said kissing her hand's back.

- Gray...- She whispered softly my name, i loved how she always called me but just saying my name feel...special.  

I leaned more next to Juvia but i didn't even need because she already jumped to hug me.

- You're so romantic Gray-sama !!! Juvia loves you so much !! - She exclaimed kissing all my face.

- I know, i know, now calm down lady.

Juvia giggled and moved away.

We stayed a moment in silence when she decided to ask:

- Gray-sama, if you don't mind, what important thing that you will do next week ??

*gulp* She asked it, i knew.

- Y-You see...our team will...err

- ?

- *sights* We will go to the 100 years mission

I saw her face going from chocked from painful. I hate that look.

- Juvia ? - I asked worried but she just turned her head to the other side, i could see her hands tightening each other nervously. I started to fear more yet her reaction.

I thought that she should contradict me, scream, be angry, but she just...

Smiled.

- That's...great !!! - She said on a happy tone, but i could still hear her voice tremblering a bit, i knew Juvia so much now to don't perceive it.

- Really ??

- Y-Yes. Juvia is sure that Gray-sama will manage that mission.

- Juvia i-

- Oh it's getting late i-i have to go. S-Se you tomorrow Gray !! - Juvia stand up of the couch, catching her bag and on a wink she left my house.

- Juvia !!

I walked at my door to see her running on Fairy Hills direction.

I closed my door and leaned my head on it.

- Damn it !!

There was only tow times that she called me by my name and talked in first person: When she was telling me how much she loves me or when she is bothered or serious with something.

Unfortunally that was the second thing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I didn't sleep very well and on the entire way for the guild i was wondering about what i could do to make her happy again.

- Good morning Gra-are you ok ?? - Lucy asked when i sat on the bar's chair and hittle my head the counter.

- You seem that didn't sleep very well, did you ?? - Mira said worried too

- What do you think ? - I answered still with my face down.

- Did you talked with Juvia about the mission ?? - Natsu appeared while wrapping a arm around Lucy'shoulders, who was pretending to don't like the Flame Brain's attention.

- Y-Yes- ARGH! - I exclaimed when i stand up and next get hit on my head. - What the hell ??

- Shut up, what did you say to Juvia, your loser ??? - Erza angryly said.

- I said about the mission and she just left my house without saying nothing. Wait, where is she ?? I was searching for her.

Erza closed the eyes and said serious - She is on Fairy Hills, and won't come today to the guild.

I widened my eyes - What ?? Why ???

- She is sad Gray - Lucy said

- Of course - Natsu participated

- SHIT, but what could i-

- It's your fault, you left her before and now she is afraid to it happen again

- I didn't want to to LEAVE HER !!! - I punched the balcony - You said that she would be secure if she didn't know about the infiltration

Erza was guilty yet about it, and she knew that really was her fault, but even it was for Juvia'sake Gray couldn't stop being mad about it - And in the end it just hurted her more... - I whisper and sat down at the chair again.

- I know, i didn't want to make Juvia sad and alone, but i will find a way to redeem with Juvia, but you need too. - Erza says and put one hand on my shoulder.

- Yeah i know, and i will do it now, Juvia is on her room right ?? - I said standing up and more calm now - Sorry.

- You don't need to, so go to your girl - She gives me a simle and pull me with a slap at the guild entrance. But i didn't had time to complain about it. I HAD TO MEET JUVIA THE MORE SOON POSSIBLE.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I arrived to Juvia's apartment and knocked her door.

- Yes ? - Juvia opened the door and seemed surprised when she saw me.

- Y-Yo, Juv

*SLAM*

-ia  - She closed the door immediatelly. WTH ?!?!

- Gray-sama what are you doing here ??? And how did you entered ??

- Erza let me.

- But why ??

- I wanted to see you - I said sincerely, and it was the truth. I heard her sight at the otherside of the door.  

- Juvia is fine.

- No you are not, please open the door.

- But.

- I want to see you.

-*sight* Okay then. - She finally opened the door and let me enter on her room. - Juvia in thankful that Gray-sama was worried with Juvia but there is no need to-

- Juvia look at me, why are you avoiding me ??

- J-Juvia is not. - I hold her chin and softly made her look to me in the eyes

- Yes you are, why are yo... Juvia.

She was with her eyes red, and like me she seemed not sleeped well.

- Juvia, what happened ??

- Nothing. - She looked away again

- Don't lie i know that you're not fine. Is because of the mission ???

She didn't say anything. I messed my hair.

- I knew that you wouldn't like that. If you didn't liked so why did you pretended to be happy yesterday ??

-...

- Juvia

She mutters something but i didn't get what was that:

- What ?

- Juvia don't want to Gray-sama be mad.

- Why would i ?? - I approched a step at her but she just moved away.

- Because you would think that Juvia is so much grooey and needy right ??

- I never said thi-

- Yes you did !! - Juvia looked at me with the eyes watering.  - How many times did you moved away Juvia and said it ?!?  

- It was before !!

- But you don't think that it still worries Juvia ??? I am afraid...that you would hate Juvia and leave m-

- That's enough.

- And i am-

- I SAID THAT IS ENOUGH !!! - I catch her arm and put her againt the wall, scaring her. She was crying now and i let free her arm a bit  - Juvia you know that i said it before and i used to an idiot, but now we are dating and i cares about you more than everyone. Don't you believe in me??

She delayed a moment before answer:

- I wanted to do, i REALLY wanted to believe in you !!! But... you always was far away from Juvia, you rarely go on missions or go out with me.

She was right, how many time has since they fight together or go on dates ??

- It's not like i am jealous about the others girls but... you spend A LOT OF TIME MORE with your team...

Before i could say something she continued:

- In the begining i didn't understand why Juvia couldn't be on your team too.

- You was new at the guild that time.

- Yes and Lucy wasn't too ?!? - She stared intensely at my eyes, it was true.

- Juvia just ignored it, that time, but then Wendy and Charl arrived, and you guys put her on your team too, i felt...

- What ??

- I felt...betrayed...

She looked away

- Juvia didn't want to enter on your team just because Gray-sama was there, you all always made memories on your mission, had fun, and even if caused troubles, it seemed so lively. All Juvia wanted was to be part of this, even it was a little bit.

- Juvia. - I open my mouth but she prevents me nodding her head.

- No, you should think that i am a idiot.

- Of course not !!! But you never told me that.

- Yes I DID - She said serious. I gulped scared. - When we was living together and i got a bit drunk i told you that, i you promised that you never would leave me alone again, and even if we came back to live on our owns apartments we would still go in missions together remember ??

Shit, i remember, i really promised her that and next i left her for six months, Juvia seemed read my mind because she next she said :

- Juvia...is not blaming you because the time in Avatar. But when Fairy Tail came back you didn't Kept the promise, i... feel alone Gray.

She said my name again like this, she was really sad and frustrated. But the worse was when she looked at me with her sad eyes.

That was the look that i most HATE entire my life, she was so broken and crying AGAIN because my fault. It always made me hate myself for hurting the girl that i loved.

- And you, never say to me that you love me too.

That was right on my heart. I hug her strong.

- Juvia, i am sorry, i should have realized that...

She stayed a bit on my hug but next she put one hand on my chest moving me away a bit and nodded her had negatively

- You...you always SAY IT !!! - She screams and i jump surprised with her explosion. The only time when she yelled at me angry was when she discovered that i tried to use the Iced Shell to defeat Zeref, she was so thankful for Natsu stopped me again.

- Ju-

- DON'T JUVIA ME !!! - She continues. - I AM TIRED OF ALWAYS BEING THE ONLY ONE THAT INVITE YOU TO SOMETHING, HOLD YOUR HAND, SHOW  AFFECTION...say i love you... - She whispered the last time and looked down letting the tears fall.

-...

- Please just...leave me alone...- She slips her back against the wall and fall down sitting on the ground and disguising her face.

-... I will came back. - I just said and left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One, two, three days and nothing, i hadn't time to think about the mission, i just could thinks about Juvia, her tears and her words. They're all true.

- Ugh my head - I said while putting  a hand against my forehead. I didn't sleep well since our fight. That was unusual to us fight so serious.

I didn't came to the guild those days and i was laid down on my bed and staring at the celling thinking when i heard the doorbell ring.

I was opening the door when i saw Gajeel with a very angry expression, but seeing mine tired face he seemed surprise.

- What ??

- I need to talk with you.

- The only person that i want to talk now it's Juvia.

- So you are at the wrong place. - He said walking at my living room, when i closed the door and sat at my couch.

- I know, but i'm sure that see me it's the last thing that Juvia wants now.

- Actually that's what i am feeling but here i am to give you a punch, or that i would do but seeing that you are so horrible as she is i changed of idea this time. You should be thankful.

- I deserve it, after all i did to her-

- Or better saying that you DIDN'T do to her but should. - He corrected me - You need to fix the things with rainwoman buddy

- She is not a-

- Gray look at the windown, why do you think that i am like this ??

I looked at out there was a storm happening. SHIT And Gajeel was a prove of that since that his hair is dripping and was forming a little water on the floor.

- If i rust i will beat you down Ice.

- I would preffer to you beat me rather than hurt Juvia and cause this.

- Gray being sincerous i never really liked you or salamander

- It's good to hear it - I roll my eyes ironically but him continues.

- But when you started to date my best friend i didn't was sure if you was good enough to her, she loves and prizes everyone that she loves, mainly you, but with the time i saw that you loved her with the same intensity as Juvia, Gray.

- But look what i did.

- Everyone have fights, until me and Levy do. But you hurted her before and now is trying to compensate it. I know that you really love her. You just need to stop being a dumb idiot tsundere and stop with your damn pride man. - I laughed a bit

- I think that's the most friendly thing that you've said to someone that's not Levy.

- Looks who talk. Know stand up from that damn couch before i eat all the metals of here.

- You don't need to say. - I immediatelly stand up and catch my jacket, running at the door  - Thank you Gajeel

- Ge-he -  Him smiles.

When i was leaving and going to Juvia's apartment Gajeel yelled:

- GO AND GET HER, BUT TAKE CARE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BECOME A UNCLE EARLY !!!

I turned my face that was burning:

- SHUT UP IRON HEAD !!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Juvia POV

Juvia was feeling terrible, i tried everything to feel better but even a hot bath didn't worked !!!

Juvia missed so much Gray-sama, i shouldn't have yelled at Gray-sama.

No Juvia, Gray-sama needs to listen it !!!

But Juvia maybe shouldn't have got so angry with him...

But Gray-sama will leave again for a mission and Juvia will be here staying alone !!! - I was rolling in my bed at each phrase.

But Juvia have the guild to spend time while.

But-

Juvia was hugging her Gray-sama's plushie , when she heard steps running.

- Juvia !! It's me !! - I heard Gray-sama's voice throught the door.

- E-Eh ??

- Whatever i will just open the door. - He said before started to open the door, but how did him get a key of Juvia's room ??

- JUVIA !!! - He exclaimed when him opened the door quickly.

- G-GRAY-SA-

Gray-sama hold my head and hited his lips on Juvia's  

He stayed like this for a minute when him finally left Juvia.

- What-

- I LOVE YOU.

- E-EH ?!?!? O/////O - Juvia didn't had time to think when him started to kiss entire my face like i always do.

- I love you, i love you, i love you Juvia. - He said every time that him kissed me.

When him calmed down, still holding my face with the both hands i asked still stunned with his suddenly kisses:

- W-Why you did it now ??  

- Because i didn't do it before, and i will now.

- Gray-sama...

- I'm sorry, i should have told you it before Juv. - Gray-sama said my name like him liked to call fondly.

- Gray - Juvia kisses him too without holding the tears.

- Please Juvia don't cry, i don't like to see you like this. - He started to clean my tears but there was more appearing

- It's fine Gray-sama, this time is tears of hapiness - I said before pull him to a hug.  

We laid down at my bed and stayed hugged, while Gray-sama was fondly stroking my hair.

- Juvia...about that you don't being part of Natsu Team was true ??

- Well...Juvia really felt sad about it but...i think it was better.

- Why ?

- I-If Juvia went on so many missions together, Gray-sama could...get tired of Juvia - She pocked her fingers

- That's a thing that i have to disagree, i won't get tired of you Juvia, even if we spend all the days together Juvia - He held me stronger but at the same time softly.

- That's seems like a proposal to Juvia, Gray-sama.

- Do you think so ? - He said with a funny tone, but when Juvia looked at him Gray-sama was smiling for something.

- W-Wait are you really proposing ?? - I asked exclaiming but him just turned to the another side.

- I didn't say anything ~

- Gray-sama asnwer Juvia, it was or not a proposal ~ ??? - I try to climb at him but Gray-sama turned us to me laid down again with him hugging me and nestling the head on my neck.

- Not so early Juv.

- G-G-G-this is so much for Juvia !!! - Steam was coming out of the head of Juvia

- Wha- Oi Juvia !!!

I was literally melting turning into water when Gray-sama said smiling.

- Gray-sama have to do a CPR on Juvia - He approached to Juvia

- W-Wait Gray-sa-

But him just came back nestling on Juvia's neck

- I am tired now, i will sleep.

- Gray-sama !! - I hitted his arm and pouted.

- Juvia, to compensate the time that i will be away we will spend all the time together until the mission.

- R-Really ?????

- Yeah, do you want go somewhere now ??

- Actually Juvia wants to cuddle with Gray-sama more a bit - I said leaning my head on his chest, listening at his heart beating faster now.

- That's a shame, because Gray-sama wanted to go on a date with Juv-

Man i just realized now that i wrote this much on a One-Shot O.O

Minna should i write a continuation when the mission ends and they come back ?? If you want tell me :)  

Thank you for read and see you ~ 

#fairy tail #gruvia #juvia lockser #gray fullbuster #juvia fullbuster #grayxjuvia #anime #manga #fluff #cute #one-shot #fanfic #malockser #animetoparts #100 years #fic

[hcsmca]

Q & A with Digital Age Artist Marilène Oliver

TEDMED: In your 2018 TEDMED Talk and exhibit, your work depicted a digitized future. What have you learned through the process of creating this work?

Marilène Oliver: I would say that they also depict a digitised present: the majority of my daily life is spent creating and moving packets of data around and the fact that I can now be represented as a high-resolution scan dataset pretty much sums how I understand and know myself! Understanding and questioning how we are digitised – both our physical bodies and our digitized activities – is fascinating for me, as it offers powerful metaphors to think about what and who we are becoming in the digital age. Equally, finding the right processes and materials to creatively re-export and materialise that scan data has been very important. There is no question that transparent materials were best for making my early stacked sculptures, then I needed to work with neon materials so that certain features could be highlighted and tagged. Now I am working with virtual reality: material concerns could disappear completely. Reflecting on the choices that I make in order to create artworks made from scan data teaches me a lot about my relationship to digitisation.

TM: Your work has strong scientific elements in it. Have you always had an interest in science?

MO: My interest in science has grown as my work has developed. I soon realized when I started working with scan data that many of the possibilities of the technology were not available to me (both practically and poetically) as long as I didn’t understand the science behind it. I started by reading as much as I could and trying to teach myself but when I needed more structure and reliable content I applied to do a long distance MSc in Imaging at the University of Edinburgh. This has helped me greatly, not only to understand the actual science of imaging better, but also to understand the rigid structure and pressures of scientific research compared to artistic research, but there is so much I still don’t know and it feels impossible to keep up! I strongly believe in interdisciplinary research and now at the University of Alberta I have been able to bring together a fabulous team of radiologists, computer scientists, digital humanists and nurses. We are currently developing projects that will allow us to create virtual and augmented reality artworks which is very exciting.

TM: In your Talk you discuss the challenges using MRI data posed, such as it being slow to acquire and could not be reformatted, which led you to use CT scans for your muse Melanix. What other challenges did you encounter when creating your work using digitized bodies?

MO: As I explained briefly in my talk, one of the most challenging times for me was moving to Angola and waking up to the fact that Melanix was not only a medical dataset that I needed to think about as a creative resource and material, but also a symbol of first world privilege. Until moving to Angola, I had taken scan data more or less for granted, but working with Melanix in Angola where the majority of the population had little or no access to public healthcare, let alone the possibility to be scanned, caused me to radically rethink my practice and my relationship to data acquired to cure rich white people when there were still countries with endemic malaria and people still die of tetanus poisoning every day. Making art with medical data in Angola demanded I realize my position as a privileged white woman of colonial heritage, which ashamedly I hadn’t considered until that time. This technology and these concerns are far from global and digital privilege is a huge issue that threatens to exacerbate the disgusting inequalities in the world.

The ethics of data anonymization is also something I find problematic. I understand it in medical research, but when it is being used to create artworks, I question whether this is always the ‘right’ solution. I have made scores of artworks using the Melanix dataset yet I have no idea who the original subject of the scan is. I would hope the work I have made would please the original subject if she were to know about it, but as we learn more and more how the digital data we generate is used and abused by government and corporations and other individuals, I think there has to be better discussions and global agreements about the ethics of data ownership.

TM: What are you currently working on? What is your inspiration for this work?

MO: Since my talk, I have made two virtual reality artworks and sculptural installations using a new high-resolution MRI dataset acquired with researchers at the University of Alberta. Deep Connection is the first work we made using virtual reality and was inspired from experiences using the Body VR app which allows 3D medical scan datasets to be loaded into virtual reality space as a semi-transparent block of data.

Photo Courtesy of Marilène Oliver-“Deep Connection”

When the viewer enters the Deep Connection, they see a scanned body lying prone in mid-air. The user can walk around the body and inspect it, lie underneath it and walk through it. The user can put their head inside the body: dive inside and see its inner workings, its lungs, spine, brain. Using a virtual hand, they can then take hold of the figure’s outstretched hand, trigger a 4D dataset and see figure’s heart beat and lungs breathe. When the user lets go the hand, the heart stops beating and the lungs stop breathing. Deep Connection has an interactive soundscape made by Gary James Joynes made from recordings of the MRI scanner. When the user holds the figure’s hand a human voice sings a beautiful mourning song. The VR experience is part of a sculptural installation created using the same MRI data. The installation is comprised of a row of 3 sculptures of bodies into which the VR hardware is embedded/housed. The sensors are embedded in the chest of the outer two figures, and the inner figure holds the headset, controller and guards the workstation.

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