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smurphyse · 3 years

Note

Loki is dating a young woman who is a fantastic cook and one day he realizes his pants are a tad tight. He’s gained some weight but doesn’t have the heart to stop eating her wonderful food

Southern Belle

Word Count: 1691 words

Tags: body issues (not like anything too triggering, I don’t think), mentions of sex

I always love feedback, but like, please be nice lol

Send me more Loki prompts! <3 I love doing oneshots!

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“Here we go,” she sing-songed, carrying a large baking dish over to the table, the little hand-painted ladybugs that decorated it’s sides seeming just as excited as she.

Loki sat patiently, smiling at her as she set it down on the blue checkered tablecloth next to a tub of ice cream. She set down a few brightly colored plates, all painted with various bugs and flowers, decorated by her own hand- which were still stained with paint, he noticed fondly.

“Peach cobbler,” she grinned, shaking her shoulders in excitement, “Just like Mamaw used to make!”

She watched him closely as he took his first bite, giggling when his eyebrows knitted together in bliss. Fuck, everything she made seemed to come from Valhalla.

His girl, his Southern Belle. The two had been dating for only a few months, ever since Loki had come to San Francisco during his travels. She had been poking around an art fair, her long curls pulled up into two pigtails as she pulled out pieces to observe.

She’d been wearing a pair of dirt smeared overalls, detailed with little butterflies and flowers, obviously hand-embroidered. They were rolled up at the ankles, her neon Converse forcing his eye to her like a shining beacon in the night.

He’d been drawn to her, like a moth to the flame, unable to control himself as he pushed past the crowds to meet her. As he came face-to-face with her she glanced up at him and flashed him a megawatt smile. He’d been speechless, utterly besotted.

“Can I help you, darlin’? You look lost,” she drawled, and it took a moment for the Allspeak to translate her thick Southern accent.

“I think I’ve just been found, actually,” he chuckled, finally finding his voice.

Her smile seemed to grow brighter, the little crinkles around her eyes deepening as she flushed deeply.

Loki had offered her a coffee, and she took it. He’d been living in bliss ever since.

She’d come to San Francisco to be an artist, picking up little commissions here and there, working in various galleries and zipping from place to place to help out her fellow creators. She was constantly buzzing around, full of excitement and energy about the whole world around her, ready to take it on day by day.

She gave Loki courage, made him see the little details of this Odin-forsaken planet that he had mostly overlooked. He loathed to admit it, but she had made him love Earth, so long as she was on it.

One day he would take her to Asgard, and he would watch as she painted the skies in her excitement and ecstasy. His world would be born anew in his eyes, just from the little things she would point out, things he’d never seen.

They found time for one another whenever they could. Loki had kept himself busy working in various art fairs, finding himself a good organizer for such events. One activity that they had found pulled them together, besides the lovely rapture that was their sex, was cooking. Loki had taken it up when he arrived on Earth, mostly enjoying food closer to Asgard’s cuisines. She was from the South, whatever that meant Loki was not sure, but she insisted it meant all things ‘comfort food’.

And comfort it gave. She’d shown him Tennessee Barbeque, ‘Pop Pop’s Soaked Ribs’, a bunch of things having to do with cottage cheese, and of course, desserts.

He was settling down. Norns, if Thor could see him now. He’d likely have a joke or two to make of his unattached, emotionally distant brother finding love in such a creature as her.

Loki could hear her now, singing some country song in the shower, her deep twang echoing off the tiles and through her small apartment.

He was getting ready for the day, pulling on a deep green undershirt as he stood in his boxers. He pulled a pair of black slacks out of his little designated area of the closet and pulled them up.

As he buttoned them, he noticed they felt a bit tighter than the last time he’d worn them a few weeks ago. They had one of her art events to go to for lunch, and he’d been wearing jeans mostly when he was working at the fairs.

Turning, Loki checked out his ass in the mirror. He still looked fabulous if he had to say, but his pants were tighter.

Could this be a trick? Had Thor tracked him down and performed some spell to throw Loki off his game? It certainly would not be the first time something similar had happened.

He lifted the shirt, turning to the side as he patted his tummy, his finger pinching along his sides as he sighed heavily. He stepped closer to the mirror, pressing the back of his hand under his chin. His mouth dropped open in shock, and he glared at his reflection.

He’d gained weight.

“I wouldn’t have nothin’ if I didn’t have you,” she sang as she walked back into the bedroom in a fluffy pink towel. She came up behind him and wrapped her hands around his waist, giving him a squeeze as she placed a kiss between his shoulders.

“Hey, handsome.”

Loki scoffed, feeling quite uncomfortable suddenly. She frowned against his back, her hands squeezing his sides lightly, his love handles.

He pulled away from her with a groan, the air feeling heavy around him. He turned to look at her, her lip set in a pout on her concerned face.

“I’m not feeling very handsome today, kitten.”

“Oh,” her frown set deeper for a moment, but was quickly replaced by a mischievous smile, “Is there something I can do to make you feel handsome?”

She tucked her lip between her teeth as she sauntered back up to him, placing her hands on his chest. He smiled down at her, his heart bursting in his chest.

Loki dipped his head, catching her lips with his own. Her hands tangled into his hair as her towel fell away, and Loki took the opportunity to lift her into his arms and carry her over to the bed.

“I think I have something in mind,” he grinned, pulling her under the covers as she giggled from his touch.

----------------------

They arrived at the event a little late. The only craft she was not talented in was the art of makeup, but luckily Loki was, and they’d had to spend a few extra minutes covering up some of the hickeys someone had left on her neck and chest.

They were at some vegan restaurant in town that doubled as an art studio. Loki would never understand it, all these hybrid businesses were too niche, they’d have a hard time lasting in this market. But, she liked going and supporting other artists and friends, enjoyed having her art displayed on the walls of local businesses, and who was he to deny her that fun?

The little buffet table was filled with all sorts of leafy greens and vegetables of all colors. It was a vibrant exhibit, accentuated greatly by her art that complimented the bright green and orange paint job of the establishment.

“How come you don’t make food like this?” he asked, waving a blackbean taquito toward her as she gazed at another artist’s work.

“I make vegetables all the time,” she shrugged, snagging the taquito out of his hand and taking a bite.

“You make vegetables with Crisco, which I believe is just butter and animal fat mixed together.”

“I thought you liked my food, honey,” her big eyes clouded with worry, and his chest crumbled in an instant.

“Oh, my sweet,” Loki sighed, snaking one of his hands around her waist, the other moving to cup her chin, “I do, it’s just-”

“Just what? You’ve been acting weird all day, Loki. What’s going on?”

He felt the heat creep across his cheeks, embarrassment flooding his every vein as he looked down at her. He hated feeling like this, vulnerable, but he wanted to be honest with her, to invest in this relationship.

“I’ve gained some weight recently… and I think it’s from your cooking.”

Her eyes widened in shock, “I haven’t noticed.”

His head cocked to the side, his lips pursing in disbelief. She noticed everything, from the ants on the sidewalk to the stars in the sky, she saw it all.

“Loki, if you want me to make healthier meals, I’m more than willing. You just seemed to like my comfort recipes so much, and I wanted to make you things you liked,” she wrapped her arms around his waist, tugging his hips tightly against hers. “I have lots of recipes in my book, darlin’.”

“I do love your cooking. I guess I just feel a little… insecure right now,” he admitted, his face starting to cramp from the blazing blush across his nose.

“I really didn’t notice anything, but,” her hands dragged back to his belly, patting it softly as she stood on her tiptoes to give him a kiss. “Now that you mention it, I do like the little bit of cushion I’m feelin’.”

“Wow,” he chuckled, kissing her again. He covered her hands with his, giving them a soft squeeze of thanks.

Suddenly, he had an idea. He leaned in and whispered hotly against her ear, “Think you can help me work some of it off?”

“Oh,” she feigned innocence, her southern drawl coming out in full force, “what kind of exercises do you have in mind?”

“The kind that includes me, you, and a locked bathroom door fifteen feet away,” Loki smirked, jerking his thumb over his shoulder.

“Oh, I’m gonna be so sore in the mornin’,” she laughed as Loki dragged her to the other end of the restaurant, admiring his ass in his trousers unabashedly.

Loki pulled her into the bathroom, locking the door behind them as he lifted her onto the sink. She grinned at him, her eyes full of light as he looked at her lovingly.

His girl, his Southern Belle.

His favorite thing to eat.

#Loki #loki series #loki oneshot #loki x oc #loki x reader #if you squint #make it about you #idc #smurphyse #loki fanfic #fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki friggason

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artificialqueens · 4 years

Text

Tree House Kisses, Chapter 21 (Adorney) - Scorpio and Veronica

A/N: I am very excited to post this chapter, especially because I get to include this outstanding artwork by my HERO, @grinder-lector-art. It’s the banner on my own blog and every time I look at it, I get a bit weepy-eyed. -V

Also, this seems like a good a time as any to plug the wonderful moodboards that Scorpio made to go along with this story (including a few specifically inspired by this chapter). If you’re looking for previous chapters, click here! Xoxo!

Chapter Summary: Everything falls apart. But it’s Courtney’s party, and she’ll cry if she wants to…

Chapter 21: It’s Raining on Prom Night

“Hello party guests!” Darienne called over the mic. “We are now serving dinner! Please help yourself to the lovely Mexican spread, over by the garden. It is all vegetarian and the trays marked with a pink heart are vegan. Don’t make that face, Adrian, you’ll be fine,” she chastised Adore’s brother. “Anyway, after you have your plate, the birthday girl has requested for you all to take your seats, as we have some entertainment, produced by Courtney and Thorgy and starring some people here tonight...I wonder who?!”

She stepped away from the mic, trying to help usher people towards the food, especially the slower-moving adults and the cheerleaders who were still on the dance floor fooling around.

“Mrs. Del Rio!” she beckoned Roy’s mom over. “Look, only a few people know this, but there’s a secret tray of chicken under the veggie skewers. For VIP carnivore guests only. Tell your husband.”

Aida laughed, giving her a hug. “Thank you, honey. Courtney already tipped us off, but we appreciate you looking out for us.”

“I do my best,” Darienne said, winking. She walked over to the main table where Courtney had a confused and mildly irritated look on her face. “Dari, there’s one too many seats here. Is it because of Raja? Didn’t we fix this? I don’t want an empty chair right up front, it’ll look weird--”

“Calm down, it won’t be empty.”

“Well, who’s sitting here?” Courtney put her hands on her hips.

Darienne imitated her pose, hands on her own hips, and leaned in. “It’s a surprise. Go get yourself some dinner, Miss Sweet Sixteen, and don’t worry about it!”

Courtney narrowed her eyes, and after a beat, backed down, pulling Adore and Roy with her over to the food. “I’ve got my eye on you, Darienne!”

Darienne laughed, shaking her head, and pulled out her phone.

“Courtney, everything is set up if you want to start the video,” Thorgy said.

“Okay…” she glanced down at her phone again. Still no answer from her dad. “Let’s just wait one more minute, until everyone is sitting.”

“Cool. Tell me when to hit the lights and then--”

“Shut up, Thorgy.” Darienne shoved him out of the way and stood behind Courtney’s chair, covering her eyes.

“Hey!”

“I told you there was a surprise, right? Well...it’s a little late due to flight delays and other extenuating circumstances, but...come on out!”

There were few delighted gasps and squeals from the table, and Courtney exclaimed, “What? What?!”

Darienne uncovered Courtney’s eyes and turned her chair around and standing there, in a black and white checkered dress, was Dela.

Courtney let out an ear-piercing shriek, jumping up and throwing her arms around her old friend. “DELA! OMIGOD! I can’t believe you’re here! How are you?! How’s Seattle?! I miss you! Oh my god!!” Courtney jumped up and down, hugging her tightly.

Dela laughed and hugged her back. “Happy Birthday, sweetie. I missed you too! Sorry I’m late…”

Courtney pulled away, teary-eyed, and sat Dela down beside her. Darienne laughingly moved the place card that had been there (Roy’s) and soon everyone was chattering excitedly and catching up, hearing about Dela’s new school in Seattle. Courtney promised to tell Dela the story in detail of how she and Roy became an official couple after the video.

“And we finally learned the truth of why Adore never liked me,” Bob joked, causing Adore to roll her eyes.

“Is it because you were so annoying?” Dela smiled.

“Absolutely,” Adore said.

“Not,” Bob added.

Courtney filled her in about the family that had moved into her house.

“See the pretty blonde over there next to Gia? Her name is Pearl. She’s really nice, actually. Adore tried to fuck her but that didn’t work out.”

Dela’s eyes widened and then she looked over at Bob, who made an “I told you so” face.

Adore scoffed, offended. “That is not how it went down.”

Courtney shrugged, smirking, and replied with a teasing, “Whatever you say,” and a hair toss.

Dela giggled. “So, I heard there’s about to be some intense walk down memory lane video? Is that true, because I love those, it’s my favorite part of every wedding, every Bat Mitzvah…”

“Yeah, we were about to play it.”

“Go for it! I better be in it though.”

Courtney grinned. “Oh, trust me. You are.”

As Adore suspected, the video was incredibly long and cheesy, filled with tons of photos of Courtney, Courtney with her family, Courtney with friends. There were also a lot more video clips than Adore anticipated - from recitals, home movies, including a gem from Courtney’s first day of kindergarten that she’d never seen.

“Courtney, love, please come out! Bob is waiting so nicely!” Karen cajoled.

“NO!” Courtney shouted, stomping her feet, refusing to come out the front door,

Bob, already tall and lanky at five years old, sat down on the front steps, head in his hands, clearly over Courtney and her temper tantrum.

“Courtney, why don’t you want to come out? You love school...” Karen wheedled.

She opened the door a crack and shouted, “I love PRESCHOOL! I don’t want to go to kindergarten! I’m too small! Everyone is going to be mean to me!” She slammed the door with a loud bang, continuing, “NO NO NO NO NO!”

Bob shook his head at the camera, rolling his eyes.

“Roy! Vanessa!” The camera flipped around to catch the Del Rio kids walking down the block, Karen at her wit’s end, begging them to help convince Courtney how much she’d love kindergarten.

Roy scampered inside and emerged 20 seconds later, holding Courtney’s hand, a big smile on her face.

“Roy’s gonna beat up anyone who’s mean to me!” Courtney announced happily, skipping down the steps.

Everyone at the party let out a collective “Awwwwww…”

Roy shook his head. “I was so full of shit. You think I was about to get in trouble by starting a fight my first day of school? That goes on your permanent record. Luckily for me, no one was mean to her.”

Courtney laughed and kissed him. “It was a comforting lie.”

On the screen, young Roy put his arm around Bob and led him and Courtney down the block towards the elementary school. “Kindergarten is great. You get to play all day and sing songs and do lots of fun stuff.”

“Did you like it, Roy?” Courtney asked, gazing up at him.

“I thought it was kind of boring, but I was already reading books. You’ll love it.”

Adore shook her head, chuckling, as the video faded back into photos. Even in first grade, Roy was a patronizing know-it-all.

Willam and Pearl dug into their food, plates piled high with enchiladas, Spanish rice, beans, grilled chicken that they’d begged off Adore’s mom, veggie skewers, salad, taquitos, and mini quesadillas, amused grins on both of their faces as they watched Courtney’s baby videos.

A video of Courtney and Adore learning to rollerblade played across the screen. A young Adore was pretty good, compared to a falling and pouting Courtney.

“Attagirl, Lesbian!” Willam cheered, earning a glare from Adore, three tables away.

Pearl leaned over and murmured, “Why does this feel like a wedding more than a birthday party?” Pearl glanced down into Willam’s lap to see him texting someone.

“Or a funeral,” Willam mumbled back, causing Pearl to laugh which was covered up by the chuckles from the crowd laughing at Adore having to hold Courtney’s hands to help her skate.

Willam slid his phone over to Pearl, to show her the texts he had been sending Adore all night. Most of them had been him insulting Adore on her horrible fashion choices during her preteen years. Pearl shook her head, snickering to herself as she shoved another mouthful of rice into her mouth.

“What y’all laughing at?” Alyssa whispered leaning forward on the table.

The screen started off black, a few girls could be heard talking. The camera shook, before a round face framed with red hair in pigtails popped into view.

“Okay, it’s on,” Darienne said before she ran off screen.

“Turn the music on!” someone hissed. Seconds later the music started and Adore ran into view, hair teased huge, in an animal print top and pleather pants. Followed by Courtney, in white gogo boots and a British flag dress.

“Ohhhh, shit!” Willam began cackling with glee.

And then the rest of the girls. April wore a black dress and stilettos, hair ironed flat. Dela was in track pants and a sports bra, and Darienne was in a little pink dress with white sketchers, sucking on a lollipop.

Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want So tell me what you want, what you really, really want I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want So tell me what you want, what you really, really want

Pearl’s mouth dropped open and Willam covered his mouth to hold in his laughter as they watched the girls prance around the room.

Darienne was a beat behind the rest of the girls, obviously missing steps, and clearly uncomfortable as Baby, comically overplaying the cutesy little girl thing to the point where it was nearly creepy. Dela and Courtney were the most enthusiastic, and seemed to know all the moves (with Courtney as a nearly manic Ginger and Dela really trying to sell Sporty’s “tomboy” vibe).

Watching a younger Adore, who was apparently Scary, prance around the room trying to keep up with Courtney and Dela was absolutely hilarious. Every time they had to turn, she would go the wrong way, at one point crashing into Dela and nearly knocking her over. And April’s imitation of Posh Spice, barely doing the moves at all, an air of “too cool” apathy only added to the overall disorganized vibe.

“This is soooo embarrassing,” Gia whispered to no one in particular, but everyone at the table heard her.

“Gurl,” Alyssa nodded.

WILLAM: Nice moves, you guys could have replaced the real spice girls

ADORE: Fuck off

PEARL: Was this professionally choreographed?

ADORE: Fuck. Offffff!

Adore glared at Willam and Pearl as they doubled over laughing, flipping her phone closed and crossing her arms. She watched them prance around on the screen and couldn’t help, but remember the arguments that took place just for this video to happen.

April, Adore, Courtney, Darienne and Dela had gathered at Courtney’s house and as they sat around the living room listening to the Spice Girls, Courtney suggested that they should make their own Wannabe video.

“Oh! That’ll be so fun,” Bendela said, the other girls nodded excited about Courtney’s idea.

“I’ll go get the camera!” Courtney ran off.

“I’m Posh,” April said.

“I’m Ginger,” Adore quickly called.

“Don’t you think I should be Ginger? I mean I have red hair,” Darienne suggested and Adore made a face.

“You can be Scary,” Adore suggested.

“If we’re doing this, I think I should be Ginger, I have red hair, I’m the oldest. April should be Posh, Courtney should be Baby-”

“No, I wanna be Ginger,” Courtney rushed back into the living room with her Dad’s camera, interrupting Darienne. “I’m the biggest Spice Girls fan, and I love Geri, I--”

“Too late! I already called Ginger,” Adore said smugly.

Courtney’s mouth twisted up in anger, gripping the camera tightly; steam was practically shooting out of her ears. “Adore Delano you know I waited FIVE HOURS at the Glendale Galleria to get Geri Halliwell’s autograph, and I have the British flag dress, and I--”

“Blah blah blah, whatever Baby!”

Five minutes later and Adore and Courtney were still in a heated argument over who got to be Ginger.

April watched on in amusement, happy that no one was trying to take Posh away from her, Dela just wanted the arguing to be over and Darienne didn’t understand why they thought they were more Ginger Spice than her.

“It’s! Not! Fair!” Courtney stomped her foot, crossing her arms and pouting at Adore.

“Yes! It! Is!” Adore mocked Courtney stomping her foot and crossing her arms, “I called it first. So I’m Ginger.”

“If you’re anyone, you’re Sporty,” Courtney rolled her eyes.

Adore took a step back from Courtney, fuming, looking around the room to see the other girls’ reactions. Dela sat down next to Darienne, silently offering her snack to her.

Adore leaned to Courtney whispering, “I should have been Ginger and you know it.”

Courtney stuck her tongue out in response, before shaking her head, “I think you made a good Scary. And you’d have been good as Sporty, too.”

“What?! Now that I think about it, that was a totally homophobic suggestion,” Adore said.

“Hey, if it looks like a duck, and walks like a...well...”

Adore’s eyes bulged and her mouth opened in mock offense, and Courtney laughed, leaning over and kissing her forehead.

“I’m pretty sure I’d be the best choice for Ginger,” Darienne whispered to Dela, who nodded in agreement.

“Well, you’re the obvious Baby, Courtney! Come on!” Adore cajoled desperately.

“Ugh!!” Courtney screeched, then cried, “You know what? We don’t have to make the video at all.” She turned around and tried to run off before Adore stopped her.

“Okay, okay, fine. I’ll be Scary because she has the coolest hair and you can be Ginger,” Adore huffed out in annoyance.

“Yay!” Courtney cheered, wrapping her arms around Adore, planting a wet kiss on her cheek, “You can be Ginger next time, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah…” Adore said, knowing full well that Courtney was lying and that she’d pull the same shenanigans next time, if there ever even was a next time.

“So, that means April’s Posh, Adore is Scary, I’m Ginger, Dela you can be Sporty and Darienne can be Baby,” Courtney turned to the other girls. Darienne frowned, not really on board with the casting.

“Courtney, are you sure you don’t want to be Baby. I mean you’re blonde and cute and would make the perfect Baby,” she tried to convince her one last time.

Courtney frowned, “Do you want to be Sporty?” the tremor in her voice and the look on her face told Darienne that they would be in for another tantrum if she kept arguing, and she didn’t think she could deal with it.

“Fine, I’ll be Baby,” Darienne sighed.

“I’m never gonna forgive you for dredging up that Spice Girls video…” Adore grumbled.

Courtney laughed half-heartedly, shrugging. “Sorry boo, it’s my favorite.”

“I loooooved it!” Dela cried happily. “I think we should do it again, like a reunion tour. There's totally room on the dance floor.”

“Uh, how about no fucking way?” Adore retorted, a look of horror on her face. She looked to the others for support, but Courtney was distracted by her phone.

COURTNEY: Where are you? It’s almost 9…

Darienne looked at Adore and cleared her throat. “You know what I think we need? Presents.”

Adore nodded. “Yes!” she exclaimed as Courtney’s eyes lit up happily.

“Great idea!” Roy jumped up to help Darienne grab the gifts and Adore mouthed ‘THANK YOU’ at both of them. Roy smiled and gave her a wink.

Courtney sat in a decorated chair, ankles crossed demurely like the princess she was, everyone gathered around her wanting their present to be opened first.

“I’m only going to open a few presents for now,” Courtney announced knowing that she wouldn’t make it through everyone’s presents quick enough. “So, who wants to go first,” she sang, closing her eyes and holding her hands out, making grabbing motions.

Her dad’s parents, Grammy and Papa were the first to pass Courtney her gift, which consisted of a card and birthday money.

“Thank you, so much,” she squealed at the hundred dollars, giving both her grandparents a kiss.

Darienne decided to be the brave soul to go next. “Here you go, Courtney.”

“I wonder what it is,” Courtney shook the wrapped present causing everyone to laugh. She tore the paper off to reveal a beautifully carved frame, painted pink and white. The picture in the frame was taken at Courtney’s 13th birthday party. Courtney started to tear up at the memories that the picture brought.

Courtney stood in the center of the picture, brows furrowed cutely, with icing on her nose, a laughing Adore beside her. Roy was trying to stop Bob from digging his fingers into his slice of cake. Darienne was the only one posed for the camera with her hands on her hips and a smile on her face while April, Dela, Thorgy and Jamin were captured in the background, oblivious to the picture being taken.

“Thank you, Dari!” Courtney sniffed, pulling Darienne into a tight hug.

“You’re welcome, sweetie,” Darienne squeezed her back, “I made it the frame and painted it myself.”

Courtney grabbed the picture frame and stared at it for another moment before sitting it aside carefully, “Thank you so much.”

After Courtney sat back in her chair, Roy stepped forward with his present. “Here you go, princess.”

Courtney took the big bag from him, dramatically weighing it to see how heavy it was. Pulling out and tossing the pink tissue paper behind her, Courtney pulled out the card first. Ripping it opened, her mouth dropped at the season passes to Six Flags Magic Mountain.

“Oh my gosh! Thank you, babe,” she pulled him down her a quick kiss on the cheek, “This summer is going to be sooo fun,” she shimmied her shoulders excitedly at the thought of going to the amusement park all summer, especially since the new rides were supposed to be amazingly death-defying.

“Told you,” Adore cracked. “Whore for danger.”

“Yeah, I’m counting on it,” Roy joked quietly, and Adore made a face at him.

Courtney laughed, setting the envelope to the side, her face lighting up when she dug into the bag pulling out what looked to be lotion and bubble bath.

“Oooh,” she bounced in her seat as she unscrewed the top on the lotion to get a good whiff, “My favorite. You remembered.” She looked up at him with adoring eyes.

“Of course. Keep digging,” Roy urged.

Courtney set the lotion and bubble bath aside, reaching into the bag and pulling out a rolled-up t-shirt. She shot Roy a skeptical look before opening the shirt to get a good look at it.

“A Destiny’s Child shirt,” Courtney turned it around, holding it up for everyone else to see.

“Yes, because you’ll need it for the concert-”

“CONCERT!?” Courtney screamed, scooting to the edge of her seat looking at Roy with huge eyes.

“Yep, my cousin Monica is a dancer on the tour and she hooked us up with some dope seats when they come here in September--” Roy said.

“Ahhh!” she screeched, hopping up out of her seat to show her mom, sister and grandparents what her boyfriend had gotten her (even though they saw the whole thing) and they smiled and gasped in excitement for Courtney. Roy slid into Courtney’s seat, glancing around the room, momentarily catching Adore’s eye and smirking. She smiled back sweetly, letting him have his little moment of glory.

“Omigod, thank you!” Courtney leaped into Roy’s lap, covering his face with kisses.

“You’re really happy? I figured like, jewelry or something...you know, it would be kind of predictable. But this is something we can do together.”

She pressed their foreheads together. “You’re the best boyfriend ever, and we’re going to have the most amazing summer.” Courtney wrapped her arms around Roy’s neck, whispering, “I love you so much…”

“I love you more. Even though you’ve been a real pain in the ass…”

“Hey!” Courtney exclaimed, pulling away, but Roy pulled her back, capturing her lips in a sweet, tender kiss, hands circling her waist.

Dela looked at Adore. “Are they always like this?” she asked quietly, wrinkling her nose.

Adore stuck her tongue out, nodding. “Always. Gross, huh?”

Dela nodded, then poked Courtney on the shoulder. “Hey, birthday princess…” she sang.

“Yeahhh?” Courtney lifted her head, leaning against Roy’s shoulder, slightly glassy-eyed.

“Want another present?”

“Yes!”

Dela handed her a shiny turquoise bag.

“Wait, you really got me a present?! But you came all the way here, you didn’t need to also buy me something!”

“Awww, I love you, and you’re so full of shit!” Dela laughed.

Courtney giggled.

She opened the turquoise bag and found it stuffed to the brim with glittery nail polishes, lip glosses, and a pair of super chic retro sunglasses, which she immediately tried on, pursing her lips in a model-esque pose.

“Gorgeous! See, I knew they were you!” Dela exclaimed.

“Aw, thank you Dela,” Courtney pulled her into a hug, “I've missed you so much.”

Courtney was about to get up, when Adore asked, “Time for one more?”

“I think we can manage that,” Courtney grinned.

“Here you go.” Adore handed Courtney a long, narrow box, wrapped in black glittery paper. The tag said “2005.” “I hope it satisfies your demands.”

Courtney giggled, remembering how she’d made Adore promise that her present would make everyone jealous. She unwrapped the box, opening the velvet lid slowly. Inside was a rose gold charm bracelet.

The first charm Courtney saw was a tiny little bow. She bit her lip, holding back tears, studying at all the other charms. There were some sweet ones that represented them and their friendship, like music notes and drama masks and a little heart, and then a bunch like the bow that seemed to go with the presents she’d gotten over the last two weeks...a tree, a roller coaster, tiny little crutches, a lollipop, a microphone, a hairbrush, a ladder, the British flag.

She laughed at the skull and crossbones, then touched the one beside it, looking up at Adore’s expectant face. “What’s this one?”

“The eternity symbol. Best friends forever.” Adore’s voice was soft.

Courtney lunged forward, wrapping her into a hug, tears dripping down her face, sobbing into her neck.

“So you like it?” Adore whispered teasingly into her hair, holding back tears of her own, trying to keep things light.

“It’s perfect.” Courtney pulled away, tears still falling. “Can you help me put it on?” she asked.

“It doesn’t match your other jewelry--”

“I don’t care,” Courtney sniffled, wiping her eyes with a gloved hand.

“Okay, then.” Adore took her wrist and fastened the bracelet.

Courtney hugged her again, clinging to her tightly.

“Come on, let’s finish dinner so we can dig into that ridiculous pink cake over there,” Adore murmured.

She slung an arm around Courtney’s waist and led her back to their table, glancing at Roy on the way, who had his eyes narrowed at her. She shrugged and grinned at him, feeling a little petty, but knowing her victory was bittersweet. She may have won this round, but he was still the boyfriend.

DAD: Hiya kiddo. Hope you’re having a blast. I hate to be a bummer but I’m not gonna make it tonight. I’m sure you’d rather spend the night with your friends anyway. Have a fantastic birthday, I love you loads, and I promise that Katya and I will take you out to dinner real soon to celebrate.

Courtney snapped her phone closed and put it down on the table, straightening out her skirt.

Roy put his hands on her shoulder. “Did he say when he’s--”

“He’s not coming,” Courtney said flatly, clearing her throat.

Adore swallowed, trying to think of something to say that would make her feel better, and coming up dreadfully short. She looked up into Courtney’s eyes, could see how crushed her best friend was, and knew that nothing she could do would fix it.

Courtney looked away from Adore’s sympathetic expression, those hazel eyes so full of concern that they’d make her burst into tears if she looked at them a second longer, took a deep breath and turned towards the dance floor, sighing. “Why are those lights out?”

“What lights?” Roy asked.

“Those!” Courtney pointed to a string of fairy lights that were out, near the dance floor.

“They probably came unplugged. I’ll go check.”

Courtney followed him over to the dance floor, looking around, tapping her foot. “Nobody is dancing. Tomas, can’t you play something more fun? Where’s the playlist I gave you?” She crossed her arms.

“Yeah, sure. I was just trying to keep it kind of chill while people finished dinner. We can kick things up.” The DJ winked at her and opened his laptop.

Darienne walked up and asked, “Hey, babe, do you still want to try and save some of the enchiladas, ‘cause they’re almost gone…”

“WHAT?! We were supposed to save a whole tray in the kitchen to bring to the shelter tomorrow! Who put it out?!” Courtney demanded.

“I don’t know, I’m sure it was an innocent--oh, no...”

“What?”

“It looks like you’re missing an earring,” Darienne said, touching her cheek softly.

“What?!” Courtney cried, panicking.

“Yeah, hold still, it’s probably just somewhere on your dress. Dela, come here, help me for a sec.”

Courtney stood, wringing her hands, as the two girls searched the folds of her skirt. “I can’t lose that earring, I borrowed it from my mom, it belonged to my great-grandmother, oh god, you have to find it, please hurry.” She began to whimper, covering her face, as Grandma Muriel approached.

“Why do you look so distressed, dear?”

“Grandma, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” she wailed, grasping the older woman’s hands. “I think I lost Nana’s earring, it must be around here somewhere but I don’t know if we can find it and--”

“Courtney, for heaven’s sake, get ahold of yourself.” Muriel shook her head, walking away.

“Just stop, it’s no use…” Courtney shook Dela off her skirt. “It’s too dark. We’ll never find it.”

“But maybe we can--”

“I said leave it!”

“Okay, sorry.” Dela exchanged a look with Darienne and backed off. “I’m gonna go get some more punch…”

“Uh, Court, I think one of the bulbs in that string burned out, they aren’t working,” Roy said.

“Ugh! Great!”

Suddenly, the cheerleaders stormed the dance floor as Missy Elliott’s “I’m Really Hot” began blasting.

Courtney nodded at Tomas, who winked, and then was pulled into a group of squealing girls by Laganja. That’s when she noticed the red flower on Alyssa’s dress. “Really, Alyssa? You of all people can’t follow a dress code?”

“Step off, Jenek.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m one of the few people here who doesn’t find your diva nonsense charming. I’m not the one. So step. Off. If you know what’s good for you.”

Some of the cheerleaders paused, taking notice of the two girls standing in the middle of the dance floor.

Bob's hand tightened around April’s as he tried to subtly nod in Alyssa and Courtney's direction.

“Five bucks on Alyssa,” he whispered, causing April to snort.

“You're terrible. Alyssa won't do anything but make her run extra laps at cheer practice or something. She's all talk,” April murmured, eyes watching the two girls.

“I don't know, Alyssa has about 20 pounds on Courtney. She could definitely take her.” Bob shrugged his shoulders, pulling April closer as he waited to see what would happen, April’s cheeks reddening.

After staring each other down, Courtney turned on her heel and flounced away, nearly bumping into her mother.

“Hey, love, did you want to do the cake now, or wait a little?” Karen said. “I think people are mostly done with dinner, so--”

“I don’t care!” Courtney snapped. “Whatever.”

“Well, it’s your party, Courtney, so I think you should--”

“Fine! Do it now! It’s not like it fucking matters, mom, it’s just a stupid cake!” Tears burned in her eyes.

Karen looked at her like she was debating whether to smack her across the face or give her a hug. After a few moments, she spoke in a quiet voice. “I’ll go get the candles.”

“Great.” Courtney bit her lip, holding back tears.

Roy took a step towards her. “Courtney, everyone is doing their best, okay? I mean, I know you’re upset about your dad, but that’s no reason to act like a bitch to everyone who’s here, who’s trying to--.”

Courtney narrowed her eyes at him, pushing him away. “This is not about my fucking dad, Roy!”

He rolled his eyes. “Okay, babe, whatever you say.”

“Go fuck yourself!” Courtney screeched, shoving him out of the way and storming off the dance floor.

Roy stood for a moment, helpless, knowing he’d done the wrong thing, as “1, 2 Step” began blaring over the speakers, the bass pumping, the dance floor filling up even more, suddenly feeling stifling.

“Good work, bro,” Adore said, thumping him on the shoulder.

“Fuck. I don’t know where she went…” He shook his head.

“I know where she went,” Adore assured him. “Maybe let’s not light any candles yet, though?”

Roy nodded.

Adore climbed the ladder, hoisting herself into the tree house and sitting cross-legged on the floor. “Hey.”

Courtney wiped some tears from her cheeks.

“Hi.” She was curled in the corner, in a beanbag chair. Her tiara was askew and her gown was wrinkled, the tulle bunched up around her like a glittery fuchsia cloud.

“Planning to hide in here for the rest of the night?”

Sniffling, Courtney shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Alright.” Adore shoved the second beanbag chair over to her and stretched out. “In that case, I’m sort of bummed I didn’t bring any snacks, but I guess we’ll live.”

Courtney giggled a little in spite of herself, then sniffled as her tears continued to fall.

“I know I’m being awful. Roy was right.”

“Yeah, well, Roy’s always right, isn’t he? That doesn’t mean he needed to say it.”

Courtney closed her eyes.

“I hate that I care this much. I feel like such a stupid fucking baby. But...it’s my first birthday without him, you know?”

Adore nodded, silently taking her hand.

“I just really thought he’d come. I really thought, even though things have been weird and everything, that when it came down to it, I’d still be able to count on him. That he still gave half a shit. I’m so dumb.” She shook her head, tears pouring down her cheeks.

Adore brushed the tears away gently with her fingers, whispering. “You’re not dumb.”

Courtney leaned on Adore’s shoulder. “I even had a song picked out for us to dance to.”

“What song?”

“You Are My Sunshine.”

“Dude. That is so cheesy.”

“I know! That’s the point!” Courtney laughed, fresh tears falling.

“Well...it’s his loss, because you are sunshine. And you’ve never looked prettier.”

Courtney smiled, knowing that she was, at the moment, a tear-stained mess. “Thank you for lying.”

Adore took the edge of a blanket and dried Courtney’s cheeks, then opened her handbag and pulled out a compact, eyeliner, and lip gloss. She got to work fixing Courtney’s makeup and within two minutes, leaned back, pleased with her work. “There,” Adore said, adjusting the tiara on her head, rearranging her blonde curls. “Beautiful.”

“You are, too,” Courtney said softly, gazing up at her.

Adore looked at Courtney and, for a moment, it was if she could really see her. Every insecurity, every desire. She took Courtney’s face in her hands and tilted her chin up. She leaned in slowly and brushed their lips together.

Courtney’s heart raced as she savored the sweet softness of Adore’s mouth. She gripped the tulle fabric of her skirt in her hands, and then before she could blink, the kiss was over and Adore was pulling away again, still looking at her but not in the same way. The walls were back up and it felt as if a chasm had opened up between them.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have--” Adore’s voice was hoarse and distant.

“No, it’s alr--”

“We should go back.”

“Okay.” Courtney felt like crying again, and she wasn’t sure why. She just followed Adore, out of the tree house and back to the party.

The good news was, the DJ had managed to keep the party going. It seemed like most people hadn’t even noticed that Courtney left, from how much fun they were having on the dance floor. Except Roy, of course, sitting at their table, sipping forlornly out of a pink sparkly cup.

She approached him, nervously biting her lip, adjusting her elbow-length gloves. “Hey.”

He looked up. “Hi.”

“I’m sorry. I know I’ve been a monster all day, and you’ve been really great, like you always are, just the best, and, and you were right, I was upset about my dad, and I’m just...I’m sorry.” Courtney pressed her lips together, trying to hold in her tears. “Please don’t be mad.”

Roy stood up and wrapped his arms around her.

“I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to upset you. But like, this is a birthday party and you’ve been so stressed and irritated, and I just thought--”

“I know, I know.”

“This is probably a totally insane idea, but what if we...keep an open mind here, this is crazy, but...what if we try to have fun for the rest of the night?” He raised his eyebrows suggestively. “Huh...huh?”

Courtney laughed, pulling him in for another hug. “You’re so lame. I love you.”

“Me too, baby.”

“Do you wanna dance?”

Roy put his hand over his heart. “I would love to, but I don’t know that Spice Girls choreography.”

Courtney giggled and pulled him onto the dance floor. “Don’t taunt me, Del Rio, or I’ll make you learn. Dela’s leaving again Monday, and I think you’d be a really cute Sporty.”

“She is the butch one.”

“Good point. Maybe you should be Posh.”

Roy laughed and put his arms around her as the DJ switched to Usher and Alicia Keys singing “My Boo.” Courtney leaned her head on his shoulder, and sighed, glancing around the dance floor. She caught Adore’s eye and smiled at her. Adore raised a pink sparkly cup at her, holding her gaze for a long moment until Willam thumped her on the shoulder to get her attention back.

Courtney looked back at Roy, who flashed his dimples at her and kissed her softly. She felt a stab of guilt, remembering the other kiss she’d gotten that night. But, it didn’t mean anything, right? It was just a friendly kiss, her best friend trying to make her feel better.

She closed her eyes, insides twisting, stomach in knots. Because if she was really honest with herself, it wasn’t the kiss that she felt guilty about. It was that feeling, the moment Adore pulled away, of regret. She dug her fingers into Roy’s shoulders, and he held her tighter around the waist.

Suddenly, she couldn’t stop the tears and she was crying again. Roy cupped her face and kissed her cheeks. “What’s the matter, babe?”

Courtney shook her head.

“One of those ‘it’s my party, I’ll cry if I want to’ moments? Should I just leave it alone?” Roy asked.

Courtney nodded as Roy swiped a napkin from the dessert table and dried her eyes.

“Alright. Come here.” He pulled her close and she fell into his arms, unable to tear her eyes away from where Adore stood with Willam and Pearl, deep in thought.

Adore stirred her punch with a straw as she half-listened to whatever Willam was running his mouth about. She couldn’t believe that she had kissed Courtney, especially in the emotional state that the blonde had been in, but in that moment it had felt so right and that’s what made it all the more wrong.

Adore was a slave to her feelings, and it felt like the more she tried to run from them, the more intense and reckless they became when they caught up to her.

That’s the moment when the lights suddenly cut out and Karen wheeled in the giant birthday cake, decorated with a huge fuchsia bow, black and white stripes, and shiny silver stars. Everyone gathered around the birthday girl to sing, and Adore focused on the sparkler candles, glittering in the darkness.

Goosebumps rose on the back of her neck, the feeling of someone’s eyes on her pulling Adore from her thoughts.

Hazel eyes looked up to find bright green eyes staring back at her. Adore grew anxious, unable to interrupt the emotions behind Courtney’s piercing stare.

Adore wondered if she had fucked up and Courtney was mad at her or even worse, if Courtney knew Adore had feelings for her that she shouldn’t have.

Adore looked away, her chest growing tight as a million thoughts ran through her head.

Courtney continued to gaze at her best friend, unable to focus on the crowd, on her mother and everyone urging her to blow out the candles.

“Babe, make a wish…” Roy said, kissing her temple.

Courtney bit her lip, eyes falling closed as she blew out the candles, not daring to let herself form a coherent thought in that moment. Because if she did, she was afraid of what she might wish for. She opened her eyes back up, and everyone was cheering, while Kimmy began to slice up the cake.

Roy swept her up into his arms again while the lights turned back on and Tomas turned up the music, Beyoncé‘s “Baby Boy.”

Pearl handed a piece of cake to Adore, taking one for herself too. “Dude, let’s go ask the DJ to play ‘American Life.’”

“That song where Madonna raps about her household staff?” Willam asked skeptically.

“Yeah! It’s so good!”

“That’s fucking embarrassing, New Girl.”

“Adore, come on, back me up here! I mean, or ‘Hollywood’ is good too…” she mused.

“I think I’m gonna take off,” Adore murmured, setting her cup down and pulling her phone out of her back pocket, sending a text to Raja asking if she could get a ride so that they could hang out.

As the song finished, Courtney lifted her head from Roy’s shoulder, smiling at him. “Thank you,” she said, reaching up and touching his cheek with her gloved hand.

“Anytime,” he replied, flashing those killer dimples at her.

Courtney glanced over to where Adore had been standing, feeling an urge to clear the air, just to make sure everything was okay, but she was gone. She excused herself from Roy, leaving him with Darienne and Dela, and hurried over. To her dismay, Willam and Pearl both reported that they thought Adore had left, and so she tore through the backyard to Adore’s house, shouting her name, finding her leaning on the side of her garage.

Her pounding heart began to slow down as she caught her breath.

“Hi...sorry for yelling, I just…”

“No, it’s okay. Are you alright?” Adore asked.

“Yeah. Um…” Courtney licked her lips, adjusting her gloves awkwardly. “Willam said you left, and I just wanted to find you so I could...I wanted to say thank you. For...for the bracelet. And...everything.” Courtney took another step towards her, eyes soft and misty.

“You’re welcome. Happy birthday.” Adore’s own eyes still had the same inscrutable, slightly guarded expression they’d had earlier. But her smile was genuine.

Courtney wrapped her arms around Adore’s shoulders, burying her face into her friend’s neck and hugging her tightly.

“I love you, Dory.”

Adore closed her eyes, holding her close, trying not to be hyper-aware of the warm breath against her skin, the scent of her silky hair, the all too recent memory of the taste of her.

Her chest rose and fell rapidly. As if by some miracle, they were suddenly blinded by headlights as Raja’s car pulled into the driveway. Adore broke away from the hug, waving gratefully to her.

“Um, that’s my...I gotta go,” she told Courtney, who simply nodded. “Goodnight. The party was awesome. And I love you too!” She blew a kiss as she slipped into the car.

Raja tossed a cigarette out the window as she pulled out of the driveway.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“Glad you texted.”

“Me too. I had to get out of there.”

“Not into the quinceanera fantasy?” Raja laughed.

Adore shook her head. “Been a long day.”

“Stressful?”

Adore looked over to Raja, the streetlights illuminating her features.

“Yeah,” Adore said, voice only slightly above a whisper, eyes flickering to Raja’s lips.

Pulling up to the stop sign at the end of the street Raja put the car in park, turning to face Adore.

“Well, we all do it. Have a big princess-like party; if we don’t want it our mom’s ‘ll make us,” Raja said lowly, leaning on the armrest.

“Really?” Adore asked, leaning on towards Raja, “Did you?”

“Mhm,” Raja smirked, eyes flickering to Adore’s lips, “My ma made sure that I had an extraaaavagant birthday party. I had a big turquoise dress, my hair done up, the works.”

Adore let out a breathy giggle, “You don’t look the type.”

“No?” Raja raised her eyebrows, slightly tilting her head and Raja’s warm breath hitting Adore’s face made Adore notice that they were closer than she realized. Lips inches apart.

“No.”

“Maybe when we get to my place…” Raja placed a sweet kiss on Adore’s lips-- that had her chasing Raja’s lips as she pulled away, “I can show you some pictures.”

Raja smiled innocently, but Adore wouldn’t let her get away. She needed to forget what happened earlier; she needed to forget her mistake, the way nothing seemed to matter, but them in the tree house. Adore leaned over the armrest, pulling Raja back towards her, pressing her lips into Raja’s harder than the first kiss, desperate to erase the way Courtney’s lips felt against hers. Raja could do that, Raja could make her forget and when the older girl nipped at her lip, Adore let her in.

The position was awkward with the armrest pressed between them, but the feel of Raja’s hands on her, tugging her closer was worth it. Adore gripped at Raja’s jacket, when they broke for air, Raja leaving kisses along Adore’s jaw before Adore guided Raja’s lips back to hers.

Before the kiss could deepen again the girls were scared apart by a horn beeping behind them. They looked up, both startled, as a car sped around them, the driver tossing them the finger.

“Damn, bro, calm down,” Raja said, and Adore giggled, arms sliding back around her neck.

“Come back here…”

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anastasiadietpills · 4 years

Text

DOUBLE DAY

7.16.2020

mwi: 251.0

nwi: i didn't

in: 3 taquitos (330 cal); chips and salsa (200 cal); taco bell chicken quesadilla w chipotle sauce (400 cal)

out: 1.5 mile walk - 150 cal, 1 hour mid-intensity cardo - 200 cal

total: 930 - 350 = 580

thoughts: i'm ✨💫💖gross💖💫✨ that's it send tweet

7.17.2020

mwi: 254.0 😢

nwi: 254.6

in: rootbeer float - 300 cal; hani - 700 cal; hot dog no bun - 150 cal, french fries - 150 cal

out: 1 hour high intensity cardio

total: 1300 cal - 780 cal = 520 net cal

thoughts: tumblr won't let me post 😡 i'm on my period which i always binge on and then follow by fasting but i don't like being backtracked because then rather than just losing 5 lbs, i'll gain 5 (or 10) and then lose 5 which either puts me back where i started or worse 😢 does anyone have advice for restricting on your period? any good food hacks? i do find working out to help a lot with the cramping and back aches (both of which are not usually accompanying my period). any advice? please?

#just ana thoughts #ana #anarexiz #anareksia #anaorexya #restrict #restriction #caloric restriction #just ed things #eating disoder thoughts #only pro for me #disordered eating #advice welcome #period mention #tw

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samisabroad-blog · 5 years

Photo

June 5th, 2019

The food here is great, not my favorite but I know I will miss it when I am back. Everything is very mild and sometimes I put hot sauce on literally anything to give myself some kick. I suggest if you are anything like me or my dad, you bring your own hot sauce to Costa Rica because the local stuff is not hot and the imported is crazy expensive.

Casado: THE dish here, it usually contains plain white rice, black beans, chayote, a salad, a piece of your choice of meat, and a sweet plantain. (pictured second)

My host family does not serve casado, pretty much ever, but I often eat it when I am on campus in the sodas because casado is always they cheapest thing on a menu. I am pretty much over casado We have rice with every meal but it’s always something different with the rice, thank god.

Sodas: a small restaurant, or what we call “a hole in the wall” sometimes they are amazing, sometimes they are terrible, but they all serve casado.

There is a really common breakfast plate here too, this one is called Gallo Pinto, which is so yummy. (pictured 3) We only have this on Wednesdays, which is probably why I still think it’s yummy. It just a mixture of rice and beans with eggs. Usually the number one victim of my hot sauce dose of the day.

They have American food with a tico twist here. They have burgers, but on there burgers is ham and black beans which is just, well, weird. They also have french fries, but their ketchup is literally the worst thing i have ever tried, it sooo sweet.

They have a few odd obsessions here, like mayonnaise, this is god awful, they put mayo on everything. I once order chips and they had ketchup and mayo on them. Same with taquitos and a burrito. Chayote, which is an amazing veggie. Plantains which I love in every form. They also use yuca or camote instead of potatoes and I actually like both more than potatoes.

There are chains here, such as McDonalds, Burger King, Starbucks, Subway and Pizza Hut. Which is honestly a surprise for me because this country is healthy, they eat really well and I actually really enjoy the food and have had no desire for the chains.

That’s the food, while I do enjoy it, someone please send me a Mexican food platter.

Pura Vida Mae.

#Costa Rica #Pura Vida #study abroad #studyabroad #student

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witch-of-letters · 5 years

Text

WITIWNU - Part 1/?

Chapter Word Count: 2865

A/N #1: Once again a HUGE ‘Thank you’ to my wonderful Beta (who so generously offered to help me with this) - @team-free-will-you-idjits-67 ! I’m forever grateful for your help.

A/N #2: I took the liberty to use some actual dialogues (but changed them for the story’s purposes) from the last episode of season 10 (found on supernaturalwiki.com, if anyone’s curious).

A/N #3: Program used for the collage is Befunky Collage Maker

Theme song: “Bad Dream” by Ruelle

And don’t forget to write a comment/send a feedback. That’s what keeps me going!

Chapter Links: (Prologue) , Chapter 2

“How much longer till we make it?” inquired Dean. The drive was getting too long indeed. Putting up your pointing finger, you pulled out your phone to access Google Maps.

“About 30 or so kilometres,” you answered in a calm manner. You’ve been in the United States for fifteen years, and yet, you’re still refusing to use American terminology.

“English, please.”

“About 19 miles,” you sighed, “Not too far now.”

*****

“I know I’ve already asked you this, but are you sure this is the right way? You going out like this?” After the Mark was transferred over to you, he became more adamant about getting rid of it. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at his behaviour, because after all, you did warn him about the consequences ofbecoming its new host.

“The words I’m about to say sound so usual right now, but I have to do it, Dean. There is another way to lose it, there always is, but it’s not an option right now. Not if we want even more problems upon our shoulders,” you tried to convene how hopeless the current situation was. There was so much you didn’t want to deal with…

“What do you mean? What way?!” he said with a clear note of hope in his voice. Hope, that you wouldn’t have to die or be sealed away forever for the mistake that wasn’t yours to begin with.

You hesitated to tell him the truth. This had to be done by Sam and him alone, even if you were best friends, who always had each other’s back. You knew that his plan would work, but you didn’t trust Rowena to keep her end of the bargain. You knew she would run away with The Book of The Damned the moment the spell was done and over with.

Dean looked at you again. He saw how your lips were moving a little, a clear sign of hesitation, and wanted to know what was on your mind. Would the answer frighten him or anger him even further? In that case, he would rather not know anything. He still felt the pang of an almost unbearable guilt for making you, the woman he loved with all his being, become the martyr instead of him.

“The Book of The Damned,” was your final answer. When you looked at Dean, you saw his jaw clench. Sam was in deep trouble now because Dean explicitly told him not to use that damn thing, no pun intended.

“Damn it!” he punched the steering wheel, making the car swerve a little. There was no surprise there. “I told him to burn that thing to ashes! What was he thinking?!” You put your hand on his shoulder, squeezing it in reassurance.

“He and Cas thought there were no other alternatives, at least none that would leave either you or me alive, that is. And now Sam’s doing everything he can to remove it from me,” you sighed once more,”And to be honest, when I told him not to come looking for me, to leave me alone, he actually looked at me as though I was ripping away his heart. I just couldn’t stand seeing him so devastated.” You quickly blinked your eyes to stop your own tears from falling.

Dean was quick to question you back.”And what about me? Why did you bring me along?” he looked at you in sadness, still hoping you wouldn’t leave him.

“Because we’re both in it. Because we’ve both been under the Mark’s influence. Because I love you too much to just leave without any explanation,” you spoke the last part quietly.”Besides,” you jokingly huffed,”you would try following me into death anyway, and I won’t let you do it. Not if I can help it.” Instead of squirming under your gaze, he bravely faced you, silently telling you that he would not back down from his promise. The rest of your ride was filled with silence.

*****

After a while, you finally arrived at your destination. What looked like an abandoned bar was actually the one that Death loved most - at least back when people used to go for drinks there. Strangely enough though, the lights were still lit. ‘Huh. Perhaps they’ve been working nonstop since the owner of this place left. Doesn’t look like it was done in a hurry…’ you thought as you walked out of the car, Dean behind you in tow.

“Oi, where are you going?! Who’s going to bring the ingredients inside?! Me alone?!” you motioned to Baby. He rolled his eyes in response but didn’t object in any way.

When you stepped inside, you were met with death-like silence, no pun intended. The place didn’t look or feel eerie though, so you focused only on preparing to summon Death. Before you could begin, you texted Sam to ask about the progress on the Book. Hopefully, it would take awhile for Dean to gather all the things needed for the spell.

You: What’s the progress, Sam? Is everything alright?

He replied immediately.

Sam: We’re fine. We barely managed to get Rowena to agree to perform the spell.

You: What did she ask from you? No, let me guess - she wants The Book of the Damned. How obvious.

Sam: Yes, but not just that. She also wants Nadya’s Codex...and freedom.

You: Of course. She wouldn’t be able to perform the spells, otherwise. As for the other thing - let her walk free. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t want her roaming around freely and doing God knows what, but right now I don’t care about her wants and needs. I know that there’ll be repercussions for this but we’ll deal with them later, just like we always do.

Sam: I’m not even sure what we’re doing is the right thing...but I have no other solutions to offer.

You: There aren’t any. Not ones that wouldn’t turn the world upside down. But there is something bad about it still.

You glanced outside. Dean was still rummaging through the trunk.

Sam: What is it?

You: You remember what I told you about the Mark when Dean was planning to fight Metatron? The Mark is both a lock and a key. Take away one or both, and what happens, Sammy?

Sam:...We’ll unleash something, and it’s not going to be anything good.

You: You catch on quick. It was made by God for a reason - a reason that we don’t know, but it can’t be anything good like you just said. I have a feeling what that might be but I’m not certain.

Sam: We’ll figure something out, Y/N/N. We will.

You: Sure. Now, let me get back to my plan A.

Sam: Wait, what plan A?!

You put your phone away. You didn’t want to tell anything to him, in case that plan went wrong. You were 99% sure it would.

*****

When Dean finally brought everything inside, even the homemade Mexican food, you started drawing a pentagram. Having placed and lit all five candles, you put every ingredient into the metal bowl, chanting the spell all the way. To put a ‘final touch’ to it, Dean lit up a match and threw it into the bowl, ingredients lighting up immediately.

“Well, well, well, I always figured you to be the most sensible one, Miss Ryder. Have you finally considered my proposal?” Death motioned to the Mark on your arm. You looked at it. It was calm, at least for now. “Oh, and is that queso I see?” Dean stepped forward with the tray in his hands.

“Yeah - yes. Homemade by yours truly. All with the bad fat,” he sniffed the food. Normally, you were into spicy food, but right now, you wanted to get this thing over with.

“Consider it an offering,” you walked forward silently. Dean looked at you confusedly.

“For?” he asked. You looked at Death dead in the eye.

“For him to kill me.”

*****

Death picked up a taquito from the tray, now laying on a table nearby. From the way he was munching upon it, he liked the way it tasted. Dean’s always been a good cook, even if he always liked to downplay his cooking skills.

“Wait, what?! Kill you?!” Dean stared at you incredulously, as though you’ve just done the worst thing you could possibly do, and in a way, you did. Death turned his calm gaze towards him, not even bothering to lift up his eyebrows.

“Yes, that’s what I proposed to do,” he looked at you again,”but you’ve twisted my words a little, my dear. I offered to seal you away. That Mark on your arm is the First Curse - nothing can kill you.”

“So you’re saying that you can’t get rid of it. I get it.”

“Actually, I could,” Death put the food away.

“But…”

“Creatio ex nihilo - God created the earth out of nothing - or so your Sunday-school teacher would have you believe.” Death half scoffed at the misinterpretation through religion.

“What, so Genesis is a lie, eh? Shocker,” jabbed in Dean. For a moment, you almost forgot he was there. Death stood up.

“Before there was light, before there was God and the archangels, there wasn't nothing. There was the Darkness, a horribly destructive, amoral force that was beaten back by God and his archangels in a terrible war,” he walked closer to Dean,”God locked the Darkness away where it could do no harm, and he created a Mark that would serve as both lock and key, which he entrusted to his most valued Lieutenant, Lucifer. But the Mark began to assert its own will, revealed itself as a curse, and began to corrupt. Lucifer became jealous of man. God banished Lucifer to Hell. Lucifer passed the Mark to Cain, who passed the Mark to you, the proverbial finger in the dike,” Death finished the last line in Dean’s face, his stare intense. You gasped.

“I knew it! I knew the Mark had a very dark energy about it! This just confirms everything!” You started pacing around the room.

Dean sat down,”Well, that is just fan-friggin-tastic, isn't it?”

“So I could remove the Mark, but only if it is shared with another…to ensure that the lock remains unbroken and the Darkness remains banned.” You turned around and raised an eyebrow.

“But we’ve already done so. Haven’t you noticed?” You pointed at your arm.

“Hmmm, what if I told you I could relocate you somewhere far away, not even on this earth, where you would still be alive, but no longer a danger to yourself or to others?”

Suddenly, Sam entered the bar, looking like he’s been running all the way there. Confusion was clear on all your faces.

“What is this?” Dean stepped forward.

“We need to talk.”

Sam walked towards you with his hand stretched out,”Whatever you are thinking of doing, don't. There is another way. You don't need to go with him. You don't need to die!”

After hearing about Death’s proposal to the Mark issue, he continued,“So, what? He's gonna... Gonna send you into outer space? Is that it?” You sighed heavily. This wasn’t going to be easy to explain. Thankfully, Dean took the conversation over from you.

“No, well, he didn't say outer space.”

“This is madness, Dean!”

“You think I don’t know that, Sam?! Of course, it’s madness for her to get sealed away because of what I’ve done!” Dean angrily brushed his hand through his hair.

“Far from it, I'm afraid,” spoke up Death. Sam looked at him coldly.

“No one's asking you,” Walking up to him, you placed your hand on his forearm.

“Hear him out! Please.”

*****

“Our conundrum is simple, Sam. Your friend cannot be killed, and the Mark cannot be destroyed, not without inciting a far greater evil than any of us have ever known.”

“What evil?” he quietly asked.

“The Darkness.”

“What the hell is that?”

“Well, what does it sound like?” Dean inquired,“Does it sound like a good thing?” All three of you looked at Death, waiting for his answer.

“Even if I remove Y/N from the playing field, we're still left with you two, loyal, dogged Sam and Dean Winchester, who I suspect will never rest until they set their friend free – will never rest until their friend is free of the Mark, which simply cannot happen, lest the Darkness be set free. Then there was that time you stood me up.” He walked closer to the brothers until he was standing right in front of them. Sam turned to you.

“You traded our lives.” Hurt was etched into Sam’s face, causing your own heart to break.

You refused to look sad in front of Death as you spoke to Sam,“I never wanted to do that in the first place, but what other choice do I-we have, Sam? I'm willing to live with this thing forever, as long as I know that I and it will never hurt another living being.”

“This isn't you, Y/N. This doesn't make any sense.”

“No, it makes perfect sense if you stop thinking about yourself for one damn minute!” You retorted, causing the Mark to flare up immediately.

“It's for the greater good. Once you consider that, this makes all the sense in the world.” Death was quick to remind you of his presence,”But now...we have this little meeting to finish,” he summoned his scythe, the blade’s edge shining in the dim light. You looked at it uneasily, dread filling up your stomach.

“What are you going to with it?”

He looked at you in surprise, figuring you understood the underlying meaning of his little speech earlier. “Why, kill those two, of course!” The brothers’ backs straightened. Your face contorted in shock and anger.

“What?! No! You don’t have to kill them - just teleport them outside this place!” If it were possible, you were sure Death would have yawned.

“My dear, they are men in love,” he explained,”they would stop at nothing to bring you back. I’ve seen that look before, countless of times.” You turned to look at the brothers, silently raising an eyebrow in question. While Dean wore a mask of shock on his face, clearly surprised by Death’s revelation, Sam, on the other hand, looked guilty and embarrassed. “He’s never once told you of his feelings for you, and why would he? He saw how happy his brother was with you. And so I need to take care of the issue,” Death ran his thumb along the sharp blade before whirling it to an attack position.

In your panic, you let the magic flow from you, the scythe momentarily appearing in your hands. Death was not amused by that.

“Now now, Miss Ryder, please return it to me.” You gripped the scythe firmly in your hands and whirled it a little yourself.

“And why would I do that, exactly? So that you can cut them in pieces? Oh, hell no!” Both of them looked at you in worry, ready to step in, if necessary.

“This is getting more than intolerable,” Death’s face turned into a sneer, which would frighten anyone that came across him. He lunged at you, but before he could reach you, you stabbed him with the blade. He looked at you in mild shock, not having expected you to do that. Same with the Winchesters.

You, on the other hand, looked horrified.

******

“You okay?” asked Dean cautiously, as you were still holding Death’s scythe. Realising he was speaking to you, you dropped the blade. You felt like it would actually sting you if you held it longer.

“Does it look like I’m okay?” you spoke resignedly,”The whole plan just went to Hell in a handbasket!” You flipped over a table in frustration. The moment Death turned to ashes, you felt your heart stop. His death wasn’t that shocking to you, but the mere failure of your plan was. Suddenly, you heard a shrieking sound from outside.

“Wait, guys, do you hear that?”

“What?” said Sam. All of a sudden, a red lightning bolt crashed through the roof, stricking your forearm. Both your arm and the Mark glowed red as itcrackled until the Mark faded away from your skin. Then the lightning flew back the way it came just as suddenly.

“What. The. Hell. Was. That?” Sam brought you into a tight hug.

“This is good. Y/N, this is good. The -- the Mark is off your arm. Nothing crazy happened.”

“Yet. You mean yet.” Before Sam could reply, Dean pointed at the dark cloud moving towards you.

“I think we need to go. Now.” With that, you ran out of the bar, and jumped into Baby. Just as you tried to outrun that thing, the car hit a blasted pothole, making it impossible to drive. You all watch incredulously as the cloud roars towards you for several seconds, before enveloping the car in the darkness.

“Sam?”

“Dean?!

“Y/N!”

The last thing you heard before losing consciousness was a female voice speaking through the darkness.

“Hello, my saviour. I’ve been waiting such a long time to be free.”

WIHIWNU Taglist (feel free to send an ask for me to add/remove you from it): @curly-haired-disaster // @ain-t-bovvered // @coffee-obsessed-writer // @waywardrose13 // @waywardnerd67 // @impala-dreamer // @emptywithout // @undertastic-dork // @carryonmywaywardwriters // @angelkurenai // @supernaturalfreewill // @nakkisalmiakki // @team-free-will-you-idjits-67 // @queen-of-deans-booty // @luciferssugarbabygirl // @spnhollis // @cherry3point14

#supernatural #supernatural one-shot #dean winchester x reader #sam winchester #witiwnu

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kangaroo-r00 · 6 years

Text

Sticky Notes: Chapter 2 - The One Where Everyone Destroys Stuff

(A/N) I can’t believe I’ve done this but here’s a second chapter to one of my most popular posts. My best friend wanted this so... here it is.

No trigger warning for this other than a brief mention of alcohol in the beginning.

Handwriting:

Jackieboy

Marvin

Schneep

Chase

Hey I've lost my notebook. If you see it then can you give it to me? I kind of need it before my show Saturday.

???

Umm... which one? You have a lot of notebooks.

The spiral one with butterflies.

You mean the one you set on fire while you were drunk?

What

You said you wanted to show us something "lit" and then set your journal on fire

Fucking what the fuck drunk me? Why'd I think that was a good idea?

I don't think you were thinking.

YOU THINK

Thinkception

I'm going to have an aneurysm

That makes two of us

You guys are absolutely sure I set the butterfly one on fire?

Like 67% sure

You set that specific one on fire.

I want to strangle drunk me

If you get drunk now one of us can do it for you

What no stop we're not doing that???

I have a full bottle of wine on hand. Chase get ready.

N o

So... don't be mad

What the fuck did you do?

You said you wouldn't be mad

He technically didn't

Piss off Marv. Schneep you don't understand, let me talk

Why is my lab coat tie dyed?

What

I thought it'd be funny in hindsight

You stole my lab coat, went to LA, and tie dyed it? For fun?

To be fair, I didn't know it got into my suitcase. We all know I throw random shit into my bag for trips. Marvin's fault it got into my room in the first place.

Leave me out of this

So don't be mad

Deja vu

But I accidentally set the couch on fire

Excuse me

You're excused

How the fuck

Isn't there a rule against no magic in the house?

No magic in any room except mine technically

Then why

It's one of those times again and I sneezed

That makes more sense

We needed a new couch anyway. I couldn't even identify half those stains anyway.

That's why I avoided sitting on or near them. And you made fun of me for it.

Not gonna lie, whenever I woke up from a nap I thought I was laying on a pile of bricks

But you're paying for the new couch Marv

Fuck

I just watched Chase pour soda into a bowl of mac 'n cheese on accident and them proceed to eat it and it was the most bewildering thing I've seen in a few weeks

At least I wasn't the one who poured orange juice into my corn flakes when there was no milk

Why am I being dragged into this?

I was talking to Jackie???

You've done that too???

Well I've seen Schneep dunk apple slices into spaghetti sauce

What the fuck

Well I'm not the one who dipped taquitos into vanilla ice cream

Traitor

At least I'm not the one who drank chocolate milk with spaghetti and meatballs

I've literally seen you do that too Marv

Shit

Jackie has put pickle juice in applesauce before

IT WAS ONE TIME AT LEAST I HAVEN'T MADE COFFEE WITH MONSTER

How have any of us survived this long?

To be fair Schneep drank it too

PSA - Schneep isn't allowed to eat rice for the next three weeks

Why???

Because that's all he's eaten in the last past week

We're not keeping the kitten Marvin

We're keeping the kitten

Honestly this one's on Schneep

How is this my fault?

You told me to drink it

No I didn't! I told you "Don't drink it!" You said "Don't tell me what to do" and drank it!

At least now we can leave him on the counter when he gets annoying

Hey I resent that statement

How are you even writing this anyway? The pen is nearly as big as you!

Spite

I can't believe Marvin turned Jackie into a ferret

Why are we even surprised by this anymore???

I told you I'm trying to fix it!

Is your definition of fixing cuddling?

… Not the point.

I can't believe it's not butter!

You're the one who bought it; it's butter.

I can't believe it's butter!

I can't believe you gave Jackie superpowers

[a picture of an earlier post it note is taped to the fridge] "Why are we even surprised by this anymore???"

Because Hen literally gave Jackie superpowers

It was supposed to speed up his recovery process, not alter his genes!

Technically speaking you didn't alter anything. Your potion just made it so Jackie could unlock his true potential. Basically you amplified the magic in his blood.

It wasn't a potion, it was a prototype of an advanced healing agent!

Potion

Is this permanent???

Yeah basically... unless you want to put his body under a great strain by trying to siphon his natural magic out of his bloodstream.

He's enjoying it anyway.

Of course he is

I can literally hear someone walking past our house while I have music playing at full volume. I can't sleep. Send help.

Of all the people I expected to break a lightbulb I wasn't expecting Henrik. I'd even suspect myself before him.

He fucking threw a full mug of coffee at a cockroach!

And the bugger survived

Are you mocking me with puns?

Unintentionally yes

How the hell did it survive???

Cockroaches can survive a nuclear bomb. Surviving an encounter with a panicked, exhausted doctor and a mug full of coffee isn't hard. Besides he missed. By a foot or two. The cockroach wasn't even near the light.

Can we just take a moment to appreciate Chase's smile??? Like it's so bright???

How'd this come up?

Just saw him grinning and realized how precious he was

Fair enough

You mean you do not have the goal of making Chase smile at least once a day?

I do now

What is this???

We're gushing over your smile

Sure my smile's great and all... But have you ever made Schneep laugh so hard he snorts??? Best. Thing. Ever.

Please no

Once. But it was one of the best moments of my life.

Honestly the fact that he gets embarrassed over it makes it twice as good

Well have you ever watched Marvin get so excited that sparks fly?

One of my favorite things

Especially when he doesn't notice and try to stop it

It's called being irresponsible and out of control of your own magic

It's called being absolutely precious

You should let yourself some slack

How about Jackie getting starry eyed over being able to help someone out

Bonus points if it's kids

Wait

The best thing I have ever seen

I smile simply thinking about it

How'd we start talking about me?

My cold heart melts a little

Please you say you have a cold heart but you're the one who helps bugs off their back

THEY WERE STUCK

I like how we all compliment each other when we need to change the subject off ourselves

All in favor of ordering pizza say "I"

Why the fuck did I hear Chase scream "One"?

Can we just acknowledge how conflicting it is to be trapped in Jackie's arms while he sleeps? You're being cuddled and you feel like nothing can get to you but you can't escape to use the bathroom.

Hey Marv??? Do you think you can turn Anti into a ferret???

Oh my fucking gods

(A/N) I kinda wanna keep going with this—

Also the food chapter thing is a whole call out to myself. I've done the orange juice in cereal, apples in spaghetti sauce, taquitos in vanilla ice cream, and chocolate milk with spaghetti and meatballs. I have put pickle juice in applesauce before but I didn't eat it because it turned green. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#jacksepticeye fanfiction #jacksepticeye alter egos #jse fanfiction #jackieboy man #marvin the magnificent #henrik von schneeplestein #chase brody #antisepticeye (mentioned)#mentions of alcohol #headcanon turned story

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ofpretenserp · 6 years

Text

another TFLN meme (3/?)

[text]: Tequila is no one's friend. [text]: It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working. [text]: I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after [text]: I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home. [text]: Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. [text]: The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you. [text]: Heading there now. Already have a boner. [text]: I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER. [text]: I'm craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks. [text]: We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown [text]: If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit [text]: i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. [text]: I'm such a fucking super-fan [text]: Just ate a whole pizza by myself [text]: Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. [text]: Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children... [text]: I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together. [text]: Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard [text]: No flamethrowers. That is a direct order. [text]: My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me [text]: I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls. [text]: Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better. [text]: Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people. [text]: Every time I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar. [text]: I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings [text]: The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a drug addict's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope. [text]: So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?

#ask meme #text meme #rp meme #tfln meme #rph: meme #*mine

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alphacrone · 7 years

Text

fake dating!zimbits ft. alicia & the gang

CW: coming out (more or less voluntary), pining, meddling friends, nosy mothers

Jack rushed into the kitchen with wild eyes and uncombed hair. It was Saturday, which Bitty knew was the only day of the week he allowed himself to sleep in. Jack hadn’t even changed out of his pajamas, and he was adorably rumpled as he slammed his palms down on the counter and stared at Bitty.

“My mother is coming into town next week,” he hissed, glaring like Bitty himself were responsible.

“Okay?” Bitty turned the heat off of the stove where he’d been cooking up a mountain of eggs. It was absurd how many eggs a handful of college athletes could eat in one setting. “Your mama seems like a lovely lady. Do we need to clean the Haus? Put Shitty in suspenders so he won’t magically lose his pants while she’s here?”

With a heavy sigh, Jack slumped into a chair at the kitchen table. “My mom is...nosy. I don’t want her poking around here, asking invasive questions, making assumptions.” Bitty raised an eyebrow at that; what assumptions could she possibly make about her son? He was straightlaced and serious to the point of being boring to the outside observer. Only people like Bitty and their close circle of friends got to see the Jack who was fun, who was a huge nerd and had an incredibly dry and dorky sense of humor.

“Well, none of us is gonna say anything bad about you,” Bitty told Jack, scooping some eggs onto a plate and grabbing a piece of multigrain bread to shove in the toaster. “If anything, Shitty’ll tell her nothing but the best things about being your friend. You know how he gets.”

“It’s not that,” Jack said, pouting in a way that should not have been endearing on a man of his age and size. “She just...tends to meddle. It’s frustrating.”

With a small laugh, Bitty grabbed the strawberry jam his mother had shipped him and set in on the table in front of Jack. When the toast popped up, he added it to the plate set it down as well. “Coffee?” He asked, already knowing what Jack would say.

“Yeah, please. But none of that sugary crap you drink.” A hint of a smile; an overused, stupidly cute chirp.

“Black as night and bitter as Hell,” Bitty said, handing him a mug. “Can I get you anything else?”

Jack looked up at him and shook his head, looking more awake and less troubled than he had moments before. “Join me?”

“Sure thing,” Bitty said. It had been many months since he’d been able to say no to Jack, and in moments like these he really didn’t want to be anywhere else.

The entire hockey team attended Mrs. Zimmermann’s event to show their support (and get autographs). She was on campus as part of a series of alumni lectures, and gave a wonderful talk on the benefits of a liberal arts education in life after college. Even Jack seemed interested in what his mother had to say, and didn’t even whisper sarcastic comments to Bitty as he often did at events like this. Afterwards, the boys invited Mrs. Zimmermann to come back to the Haus for pie and beer, and she very happily accepted.

Bitty, of course, had prepared several hors d'oeuvres and two types of pie: maple-sugar-crusted apple, in case Jack had inherited his taste from her, and cherry, in case her Wikipedia page was correct in saying that her favorite drink was cherry Coke. The boys pulled out their finest cases of cheap beer and vodka, and a small party began in the Haus kitchen as several of the volleyball girls came by to meet the lovely and iconic Alicia Zimmermann, née Kennedy.

By the time all of the hors d'oeuvres had been wiped out and Bitty was frantically throwing several trays of Bagel Bites and frozen taquitos into the oven, Jack and his mother had slipped from the Haus to take a brief stroll around campus. No one else seemed to notice, preoccupied with the last remainders of pie and the free-flowing alcohol. Bitty hoped that speaking alone with his mother would ease Jack’s anxiety about her visit. Deep down, Jack clearly cared a great deal of what she thought of him.

The walk, as it turned out, had the complete opposite effect.

As soon as the Zimmermanns returned, Jack stormed into the Haus and grabbed Bitty by the arm, dragging him upstairs before Mrs. Zimmermann had even wiped her shoes off on the HAUS SWEET HAUS doormat.

“Jack, what-?” Bitty began, but was halted by the truly devastating look of embarrassment on Jack’s face. “Are you okay?”

“I, uh.” Jack cleared his throat awkwardly, opening his bedroom door and motioning for Bitty to enter. “I have a...huge favor to ask.”

“What is it?” Bitty sat down on the foot of Jack’s bed, lacing his fingers together anxiously.

“Willyoupretendtobemyboyfriend?” Jack mumbled, pointedly avoiding Bitty’s eyes.

“What was that?” Bitty asked.

“Will you pretend to be my boyfriend?” Jack repeated, slower.

“Uh.” Bitty stared at Jack, not quite processing the request. “Is this a joke?”

“No,” Jack said. “My mom thinks we’re dating and...I don’t know. The idea of it makes her happy. I couldn’t bring myself to correct her. And if she thinks I’m dating someone, she won’t worry so much about me being social or...normal.”

This was too much information for Bitty to take in. He stared down at his lap, feeling a little light-headed. “You are normal,” he said after a moment. “Why does your mom think we’re dating?”

Jack shrugged. “I think you remind her of my last...well, she thought he was my boyfriend.”

“You’re gay?” Bitty thought his heart was going to give out it was beating so fast.

Jack shrugged again. “Something like that.”

“Oh.” Bitty nodded slowly; he needed another drink. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Jack repeated, tone cautious, almost worried.

“Yeah, okay, I’ll pretend to be your…” Bitty couldn’t finish the sentence. This was the worst idea he’d ever agreed to.

“Great, thanks,” Jack said, all but collapsing onto the bed next to Bitty. “She wants to take us out to dinner tomorrow. Us and the guys...Lardo…”

“Your friends?” Bitty filled in with a teasing look.

“Yeah. Friends.”

Bitty laughed, then felt his blood run cold. “Jack, if we’re pretending...you’re gonna have to say something to the others.”

This didn’t seem to scare Jack like it did Bitty. “Yeah. It’s been a long time coming, probably. They’re good people, they’ll get it.”

“Okay,” Bitty said. “I’ll, uh. Distract your mom with the Frogs and the girls and send the others up.”

“Thanks, Bittle,” Jack said, and his smile made Bitty’s stomach turn with longing.

“‘Course, Jack,” he said, already feeling his heart tearing in two.

“I have...an odd request,” Jack said as Shitty, Lardo, Ransom, and Holster filed into his bedroom.

“I’m already wearing pants, brah,” Shitty teased, flinging himself onto Jack’s bed. “I think that’s more than enough odd requests for one day.”

“What’s up?” Ransom asked, settling down in the armchair across from the bed. Holster sat down on top of him, not seeming to care he was squishing his best friend. “You alright?”

“Um. Yeah. Well.” Jack heaved a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “I need you all to pretend Bittle is my boyfriend for the next 24 hours.”

The silence that met them was deafening. Ransom was staring at thin air, mouth open like when he was trying to remember something for class. Shitty and Lardo simply looked stunned, and Holster was actually glaring at Jack suspiciously. Eventually, he asked, “Why?”

“My mom thinks Bittle and I are dating,” Jack explained in a dull monotone. “And it would get her off my back to keep believing it.”

“So she thinks you’re gay?” Ransom asked, still looking like he was staring a puzzle he was this close to solving.

Jack shrugged. “No, she knows I like guys.”

Holster’s brows shot up. Shitty said, “Oh, shit. You didn’t have to tell us, man, if you’re not ready-”

Jack shrugged again. “I trust you guys. Just...don’t tell anyone else.”

“Of course, Jack,” Lardo said softly.

Ransom. “Yeah, you know we’ve got your back.” Holster mimed zipping his mouth shut, though he kept looking between Jack and Bitty with something akin to concern on his face.

“Wait.” Shitty stood up and moved to stand in front of Jack. “Why does she think you’re dating Bits? If anyone in this room was your boyfriend, it’d be me. I’m wounded, Mrs. Z!”

Jack rolled his eyes. “Once Bittle breaks up with me, I’ll her you’re my one true love, Shits.”

“Thank you,” Shitty said primly. He shot Bitty a mock glare and said, “Don’t steal my man.”

Smiling sweetly, Bitty turned to Jack and asked, “Would your mama mind terribly if we uninvited Shitty from dinner tomorrow?”

The shrieking, squawking noises Shitty made in protest were so loud they frightened a flock of birds from the tree outside Jack’s window.

Alicia took them all out to dinner at the nicest restaurant in Samwell, Nola’s. It was rare that Bitty went to places with cloth napkins with his boys, but he’d made sure they all dressed appropriately before leaving the house. Even Lardo wore one of her less-arty black dresses, the kind she used for the end-of-year banquet and things like that. The menu at Nola’s was a standard yuppie fare, but Bitty was overjoyed to try their pumpkin gnocchi without having to pay out of pocket.

“Hey,” Jack murmured, nudging Bitty with his elbow as they discussed drinks and appetizers. “They have that wine you like.”

“Boxed?” Bitty joked.

Jack rolled his eyes, but his smile was fond. “No, the one that got left behind at Hausgiving last year. Um. Boom Boom?”

Bitty snorted loudly. “What was that?”

“You know what I said,” Jack said grumpily. “It’s a syrah. I know you like that.”

Bitty grinned at Jack. “I do, thank you. But I’ll drink whatever the table’s drinking. Because I’m 19. And cannot order wine on my own.”

Jack gave him a curious look. “I always forget how young you are.”

“You’re the only one, then,” Bitty said drily. “I’ll be getting carded until I’m fifty.”

“Excuse me,” Jack said, hailing the waiter. “Could we get a bottle of Boom Boom syrah for the table, please?”

The man didn’t bat an eyelash, nor did he even look at Bitty for more than a millisecond. “Of course, sir.”

Mrs. Zimmermann smirked at them knowingly. “Jack, you don’t like red wine,” she said.

“No,” he said calmly. “But Bittle does.”

“Bittle,” she repeated with a fond laugh. “You’re just like your father. He called me Miss Kennedy for the first six months of our relationship, I swear. I thought I’d walk up to alter and have us both pronounced Mr. and Mrs. ‘Miss Kennedy.’”

“Goodness!” Bitty laughed. “What a ridiculous man.”

“Cute,” Lardo said.

“It was,” Mrs. Zimmermann said. “These Zimmermann men are charming in their silly ways.”

“Maman,” Jack said, cheeks turning a lovely shade of pink.

“Oh, sweetheart, I agree,” Bitty said without thinking, patting Jack’s hand.

“FOINE!” Holster shouted, mouth full of bread.

“Five bucks in the sin bin,” Ransom said, almost as loud. “Pay up, Bits.”

Bitty scowled at them, but Jack pulled out his wallet and tossed a five dollar bill towards the middle of the table. “I’m paying for your wine,” he said sternly. “So no more fines until dessert.”

“Yessir!” Shitty said, casting a warning look at the others. Without missing a beat, Jack wrapped an arm around Bitty’s shoulders and pulled him closer. Bitty’s face burned.

“So, please, tell me how you two got together,” Mrs. Zimmermann said as the wine arrived. Bitty noticed she kept her voice hushed and paused as they waiter poured out their glasses, waiting until he was several feet away before looking expectantly at Jack and Bitty. It was such a careful little gesture, but it made Bitty sad in a latent, familiar way.

“Well, uh.” Jack clearly hadn’t planned this far ahead.

“We’re in a class together this semester,” Bitty piped up, swallowing back his nerves. “So we’ve been spending more time together, studying and baking- oh, and our early morning checking practices.” He was suddenly very thankful for the year of drama class he’d done in high school, before his time had been consumed by hockey. “I have a little issue with checking, and Jack’s been helping me through it. So we were just up at an unholy hour one morning, and I hadn’t had my coffee and Jack was trying to be patient with me but he got me in the gut hard enough to totally just knock the wind out of me and…”

“It was like a dam burst,” Jack said quietly. “And I realized what he meant to me. So I kissed him.”

Bitty held back a stunned smile. “And I nearly passed out from shock.”

“Hey, I bought you Annie’s afterwards,” Jack said defensively.

“Our first date,” Bitty teased, bumping his shoulder against Jack’s chest. “So romantic.”

“That’s so sweet,” Mrs. Zimmermann said. Bitty nodded and grabbed his wine glass to stop the shaking of his hands. The others were casting him and Jack a variety of odd, curious, confused looks.

“Hey, Jack,” Holster said, standing. “Can I talk to you outside for a second?”

“Um, sure,” Jack said, casting Bitty an apologetic look. “If the waiter comes, can you order the cobb salad for me?”

“One greasy cheeseburger coming up,” Bitty said with a smirk. Jack rolled his eyes and pressed a quick kiss to Bitty’s cheek, leaving him reeling as he followed Holser out of the restaurant.

“Is Adam okay?” Mrs. Zimmermann asked, concern evident in her eyes.

“Oh, yeah, you know. Jack’s just a real good captain. You can talk to him about anything,” Bitty said, wondering how his wine glass was already empty.

“Well, before he comes back, I just wanted to say that I’m so happy you two are together,” Mrs. Zimmermann said, touching Bitty’s shoulder lightly. “I was worried he’d deny himself this kind of relationship, what with his career goals and all that, but I’ve never seen him look so happy and relaxed as he is around you.”

Bitty looked down, the first pricks of tears threatening at the backs of his eyes. “Oh. Um. Well, I’m happy, too. He’s a really great guy.”

“Yes, he’s a good boy,” Mrs. Zimmermann said. “I wish the best for you two.”

Before Bitty could respond, Holster returned to the table, looking tired. “Jack’s in the bathroom,” he said, looking pointedly at Bitty for a minute before turning to the rest of the table. “I’m starving. Do you think they’ll bring us more bread?”

As Mrs. Zimmermann was sucked into the group’s loud and obnoxious discussion of whether it had been Holster or Ransom who had eaten the most bread, Bitty slipped away to the small, one-man bathroom in the back of the restaurant.

“Jack?” He called, knocking on the door tentatively. “Are you okay? It’s Bitty, by the way.”

The door opened to reveal Jack standing there, face damp as if he’d just splashed water on himself to cool down. It darkened the collar of his shirt and soaked into his hairline. Somehow, Bitty still found it attractive.

“Holster said you have a crush on me,” Jack said softly, eyes darting around the empty hallway.

Bitty was going to murder Holster. “Oh! Um, he- he what-?”

“I think I have a crush on you,” Jack continued, looking down at his feet. “I. I really like this whole...being boyfriends thing. If you’d want to do it. For real.”

This wasn’t the most romantic location in the world, standing in the doorway of a cafe bathroom, but Bitty didn’t care. He surged up on his tiptoes to kiss Jack soundly on the lips, wrapping his arms around Jack’s neck when Jack’s hands found his waist.

Almost shyly, Jack pulled back to look at Bitty, eyes soft and adoring, then he kissed Bitty again, pushing him up against the wall across from the bathroom. Bitty wanted nothing more than to wrap his legs around Jack’s waist and let him have his way, but someone cleared their throat just to Bitty’s left.

Shitty stood there, beaming, arms outstretched. “Oh, you beautiful fuckers, c’mere.”

He pulled them into a quick hug and kissed both their cheeks like a proud father. “Ugh, this is too cute. Go back to the table before I throw up on you lovebirds.”

“I told you we should have uninvited him,” Bitty said as Shitty slipped into the now-unoccupied bathroom. Jack just grinned and kissed Bitty once more before they returned to a table filled with smug, excited friends and a very happy Mrs. Zimmermann.

[My writing tag]

[My online novel, The Discourt Knife]

#anna writes things #check please!#zimbits #zimbits fanfiction #omgcp fic #au #canon divergence

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