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toniiswrld · 2 months

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into you ☆ l.at

lee anton x fem reader

your mom and her best friend set you up with your old friend from childhood, and you two pretend to date in order to keep them happy. but what happens when feelings start to brew, and the past gets revealed?

college!au, fake dating, ex friends to semi friends to lovers, slowburn, mutual pining, fluff, a bit of angst, smut 18+ MDNI, anton is a self sabotaging idiot.

🎀 cw. smut (ofc), dom!anton, fingering, not really a size kink but anton's size is mentioned a few times, overstimulation, unprotected sex (pls wrap it up,,) creampie, little bit of dry humping, cum eating

⭐️ wc. 15.7k

🎧 into you . tamia • sycamore girl . rex orange county

"i feel like it's so humiliating having my mom set me up on a date." you hold the phone in between your cheek and your shoulder, trying your best to find a good enough outfit.

your best friend, sky, was your emotional support through this whole situation. "it's kind of cute though, like she's looking out for you in a way" she says over the speaker, and you roll your eyes at her comment.

"right, because nothing is cuter than your mom saying 'you're so lonely i'm going to take matters into my own hands'," a hard sigh leaves your lips.

"well when you put it that way, i guess you're right. but this could be nice! what if he's nice, what if he's hot-"

"please, i don't really have a lot of hope in whatever nice guy has picked out"

speaking of the nice guy, you heard the doorbell ring and you sigh again knowing that the next few hours you could be spending rotting in bed, you will now be spending with a mystery man who's probably some secret asshole that's masked as an angel by your mother.

you get off the phone with sky and make your way downstairs towards the door, slipping your shoes and sweater on. you look to your side and see your mom walking down the hall with a bright smile on her face. as you open the door, you see someone you never expected to see.

lee anton.

he has this near fake smile on his face when the door opens, making eye contact with you and then smiling at your mom who was behind you.

"hi y/n, hi mrs.l/n" he starts and you have to fight your eyes from rolling so hard. why was he here? surely he wasn’t… no. no way

"hello anton, you look so handsome, come in, come in!" your mom now is pushing you to the side to drag the boy into the house.

"now y/n, i didn't tell you before because i wanted to make sure you wouldn't freak out, but anton here is your date!"

and that's when a piece of your soul died.

"excuse me?" you try your absolute hardest to not yell, but the confusion and slight anger is building up.

ever since you were little, your mom and antons mom always wished that you two would end up together. you two were friends up until high school, but with new friend groups and new interests the two of you went down different paths. it happens and there weren't really any hard feelings, at least until he started completely ignoring your existence. you didn't hate him, but you were not pleased with his past behavior. and you definitely were not pleased right now.

"don't be rude y/n, this is a great thing! you're a beautiful girl, and anton is a handsome boy. you two have known each other since you were kids and you both go to the same university! it's a perfect match. now you two hurry up and go so you don't miss the reservation i made. have fun" she shoves you two out of the door before you could protest any further and anton is saying goodbye to your mom in his fake sweet voice he's always used with her.

if only she knew that you two haven't spoken since junior year of high school.

you fold your arms across your chest while you walk towards antons car, him rushing to catch up to you so he could open the door.

"how nice of you" you taunted, giving him a fake smile before stepping into the passenger's seat of his car. he gives you that same fake smile before closing the door, not saying a word to you. he walks around the car and gets in, putting on his seatbelt and starting the car.

"you want aux?" he finally speaks, pressing the bluetooth options on his car to connect your phone if you'd like. you happily oblige, not wanting to listen to whatever he wants to put on. even if you two had very similar taste in music, you would always argue that your taste is better. once you press shuffle on your main playlist, he pulls his car out of your driveway and starts the drive to the restaurant your mother picked out for you.

you shift in the seat so you're leaning towards the window, and you open your messages to text your friend sky about the insane situation you were in,

you: oh my fucking god you: its anton you: lee fucking anton!! my mom is sick sky: omg you two haven't talked since highschool! sky: please don't kill him you: no promises sky: maybe you two will fall in love now you: over my dead body sky: if you are gonna be in the same space as him for the next few hours, maybe ask him to put me on with wonbin you: do not use my pain and suffering as a way to get dick sky: i'm trying to find ways for us both to benefit from this! sky: i shouldn't have to suffer because you don't want to talk to anton sky: plus anton is hot! as fuck! i say give it a shot, and if it works out then i can have a shot at his sexy friend you: you are evil sky: update me later babes

aside from the music playing in the car, the ride to the restaurant was silent. anton wanted to talk, but he just couldn't find the right words to say. not like you would want to listen to anything he'd say anyways. but it was just for the car ride, he told himself he'd talk once you two were seated.

pulling into the parking lot, anton parks the car and turns off the ignition. he got out of the car and did a slight speed walk so he could open your door to let you out, and this time the smile was genuine as you got out of the car.

he's not an asshole, you think. i guess i could try and make the most of this date.

he was never an asshole to you, even throughout the years you haven't spoken. of course, avoiding you and acting like you don't exist at events could be taken as being an asshole, but it's not bad compared to the way you've been treated by other men. he's always been a sweet, well-mannered, soft spoken boy.

you two weren't best friends back then, but it still hurt when the two of you drifted apart.

as you two walk into the restaurant, anton talks to the host about the reservation your mother made and you two get seated at a nice booth near the back.

"so, did you know about this? like, did you know that i was the person you were getting set up with?" you start, not looking at him but looking at the menu to get a feel of what you'd want once the waiter comes around to ask for drinks.

"well not at first, but my mom kept hinting at things that traced back to you. wasn't surprised though, they've been trying to set us up since we were in elementary school." he says it almost with no emotion, and you react with a small laugh that makes him smile.

"what kinds of things did she say?" you're intrigued once you really process what he said.

"well" he starts, and you lean into the table with interest. "it wasn't anything out of the ordinary. she was just like 'you should come to visit this weekend, there's a girl i think you would really hit it off with. you actually know her and you two would make a great couple blah blah blah.' things she's already said to me before trying to set me and you up. your mom really didn't give you any hints about today?" it was his turn now to be intrigued, remembering how shocked you were to see him at the door earlier.

"i had no idea. i was scared she was setting me up with some ugly asshole that she would think i would like, when she really has no idea what my type is. she just told me to come for the weekend and was like 'oh he's a sweetheart you're going to love him!' and that was that." you mock your moms swooning voice and anton laughs.

the next hour and a half at the restaurant went well, you two were able to break the awkwardness and catch up from the past years. it felt good honestly. the relief of getting a friend back was always the best feeling.

once you two finished eating, the waiter came around to hand you guys the bill. you figured you two would just split it, this was technically a date but you didn't really think of it that way. and you didn't want anton spending his money on you, you both were forced on this 'date' and it wouldn't be fair in your eyes for him to pay for you. you quickly turn to grab your wallet out of your purse, but once you get your card out the waiter is already walking away with antons card.

"dude, you didn't have to do that!" you whisper yell at him, and he just chuckles.

"don't worry about it. date or not, if you pulled your card out it would look like i was some broke asshole trying to split the bill" he says in his soft voice and you nod, understanding where he was coming from.

the waiter comes back around with antons card, and you guys make your way out of the restaurant and back to his car. he opens the door for you again, you step in and make yourself comfortable this time, adjusting the seat to your liking.

the ride to your house was silent, but it was a comfortable silence. you didn't really know what this meant for the two of you. were you guys friends again? was this really a date and there were more in the foreseeable future? was this just a one time thing?

to be completely honest you didn't want to date anton. not that he wasn't attractive, you would be living a lie if you said he wasn't. he was definitely one of the most attractive guys you've ever seen, but it would just be weird to date him. you guys were friends and it was still a semi-mystery on where you two stand in terms of friendship. and did you really want to date someone your mom set you up with? you're still in college and honestly you don't know what exactly you want yet.

"so um, i'll walk you to the door" suddenly the quiet was awkward again as he got out of the car to let you out and walk you to the front door. and now here you two were, standing awkwardly in front of the door both trying to think of something to say.

why was it so weird now? you were both fine holding a conversation not even an hour ago.

"sorry that our moms pushed us into doing this, but it was nice to uh- it was nice to talk to you again" anton puts his hands in his jean pockets and looks down at you with a sheepish smile, and you look up at him and smile back.

"yeah, it was nice seeing you. you're not gonna go ghost on me again after this are you? cus i know where you live, and i'll tell your mom" you threaten him, and he puts his hands up in defense. if there's one thing you remember about your friendship with anton, it was that his mom did not play about you. if even a scratch got on you when you and anton were together, he would get an earful about being too reckless. even if you were the reckless one

"there's no need for all of that! i won't go ghost on you, it's nice to get a friend back"

"well then, i'll see you on campus?" you look up at him, and he nods.

"see you on campus"

and with that, you put your keys into the door and make your way into the house, giving anton a small wave goodbye before closing the door and taking off your shoes. as you make your way through the house and pass the living room, you see your mother sitting on the couch with a smile so wide her face probably hurts.

"next time you ask me to come home for the weekend to go on a date, i'm blocking your number" you joke, and she rolls her eyes before getting up and walking towards you excitedly.

"how did it go? isn't he just the sweetest boy? are you guys going out on another date? did you kiss?" she wiggles her eyebrows and you nearly gag.

"mom! oh my gosh, no i did not kiss anton! what kind of girl do you think i am? i don't kiss on the first date" she lets out a small pfft at your response.

"so you’re saying there's a second date?" the tone in her voice is teasing and expectant, and you shut her down again.

"that's not what i meant... and i wouldn't even call that a date. we had a nice time though"

"i think you should give him a chance y/n" her hands run up both your arms, giving them a small squeeze when she reaches your shoulders. she gives you a look that almost makes you want to give into her, but you have to stand on your own words.

"i think that, i'm going to go upstairs and go to sleep and forget today happened"

the next day you're making your way back to campus, leaving earlier in the day so you can hang out with sky before she's too tired to listen to your rambling.

"i can't believe you didn't text or call me last night to give me all the juicy details about your date with anton!" sky whines, plopping next to you on the couch with a frown on her face.

"it was not a date, and i wanted to tell you in person that's why i didn't tell you anything! you should be thanking me for being such a thoughtful and considerate friend"

"yeah yeah, now let's hear it. how was it? what was he wearing, did he smell good, did you guys kiss-"

"what is up with people thinking i just go around kissing everyone? i did not fucking kiss anton, and i didn't smell him! you weirdo..." you playfully slap her shoulder, and she giggles. "but it was fine. it was more like catching up with an old friend than a date."

"so are you guys friends again? it's been how many years since you've talked?"

"like 3 years now... it's so weird! it was so awkward at the start too, like i didn't know what to say to him and then it being a date that our moms planned just made it even worse"

"this is good though! now that you two are friends, i can stop trying to avoid his friend." she’s smirking now, and you give her the meanest side eye. she’s been crushing on wonbin for months now, but she didn’t want to date one of antons friends for your sake. You did have some mutual friends, but you wouldn't go past the line of friendship with anyone who was associated with anton because you didn't want to cross paths with him more than necessary.

"i really can't believe you would take advantage of this situation to hook up with wonbin!"

"i'm just putting it in the air that i would totally fuck antons friend if given the opportunity. and with your little situation you give me the perfect opportunity to shoot my shot" she says matter of factly, and you know that you can't stop her once she has her mind to something so you just sigh.

"you're unbelievable"

after debriefing your saturday with sky, you two were still hanging out on the couch watching tv. truthfully, the tv was watching you both since you were both on your phones. while you were scrolling through videos, an unexpected notification pops on the top of your screen.

it was anton. what was he texting you for? technically you two were friends again, but you didn't know you two would be back on a texting basis so soon.

ant: are you back on campus? ant: this is anton btw you: i knew it was you you: but yeah i'm on campus, what's up? ant: can you meet me in the dining hall you: right now? ant: if you're not busy right now, then yeah you: i'll be there in 10

“i'm gonna go to the dining hall to get some snacks, you want anything?”

“just a soda pleaseee”

you go to your room to change your sweatpants to jeans and throw on a hoodie, then you make your way out of your apartment to meet anton. luckily, it wasn't a long walk from where you lived. it was a small apartment off campus that you and sky split. as you’re nearing your destination, you see the boy standing outside on his phone while he waited for you. he looks up and sees you, waving you over once you notice him.

“hey” he breathes out once you reach him, and you put your hands in your hoodie pocket while you look up at him.

“hi” you give him a small smile, following him as you two walk into the dining hall.

“you weren’t busy or anything, right? i didn't mean to interrupt your afternoon” he finds a nice table for you two to sit, and you watch as he fidgets with his fingers.

“no, no don't worry i wasn't doing anything. but what's up?”

he lets out a sigh and runs his fingers through his hair. he seemed nervous, which was making you nervous. you literally saw him yesterday, what could have happened in the last 24 hours?

“don’t be mad, okay?”

“you can’t tell me not to get mad anton, now i'm preparing to be mad.” you roll your eyes, the concern you had turning into a lack of patience. he should know by now how much of an impatient person you were, never liking suspense or surprises.

“well um, after yesterday my mom was really happy that we went on a ‘date’,” he puts finger quotes over the word date, and you raise an eyebrow “...and she kept going on and on about us being a couple”

“you told her we weren’t dating, right?”

silence. it was your time to sigh now, already knowing where this was headed.

“anton…” your voice drifts, and he jumps to defend himself.

“she was just so happy! i didn't want to let her down. so she’s kind of under the assumption that we’re dating.” he puts his head down, probably because he expected you to start yelling at any moment.

“dude! you can't just do that without telling me, now my mom’s gonna think we’re together too” it was your time to sigh now, confusion and a tang of anger brewing through you.

“i'm sorry, really. but thats why i needed to see you, i think i have a solution for this”

“the solution better be you telling your mom that we’re not together, anton” your voice is serious, and you fold your arms over your chest.

“well not exactly, we could just let our moms think we’re a couple whenever we are around them, but we don't have to really be together! that way we can still be friends and they can be happy” he says it like it's the greatest idea in the world, and you stare at him blankly for a few seconds.

“are you insane? i am not doing that.” a scoff leaves your lips, and he gives you a defeated look before he tries again.

“it's just for our moms! no one has to know” it’s honestly comical at this point how he was borderline begging you. but you understand where he’s coming from. if you told your mom that you and anton really weren’t dating, you would never hear the end of it and she would keep trying to get you two together.

“i'll think about it. but you're buying me lunch”

you spent the night in your room thinking. it really wasn't a bad idea, but fake or not, did you want to date anton? just for the sake of your moms, and no one else had to know. it would be believable in the eyes of your moms, since you two were friends again you two would be hanging out.

i guess i could pretend to date him for a little bit. how often would we be around our parents for it to be a problem? if we’re always on campus, they won't expect to see us that much. you were mumbling to yourself, weighing your options before you decided to text anton your decision.

you: i thought about it ant: so? you: it's just for our moms you: and you're buying me food for a month! ant: deal

you have your head in your hands while you try to keep yourself focused for the last 20 minutes of class, bored out of your mind while your professor talks at the slowest pace known to man. you're spacing out now, twirling your pen between your fingers and staring straight forward. letting your eyes drift, they fall on anton. he was sitting in the row in front of you, and from where he was sitting you were able to see his side profile. it almost looked like he was sleeping, which wouldn’t surprise you since you were also super bored.

how do you go back to being friends with someone after years of not talking? the two of you were cool but you can't help but think that it would be awkward for a little bit until you two were comfortable again. how much has he changed? how much have you changed? what if you have nothing in common anymore, and it was the universe's plan for you two to drift apart?

stop overthinking things, you guys are just friends. there was nothing to overthink, right?

after a few more minutes of arguing with your inner monologue, class is finally over. you're packing up your things when you notice someone is standing over you. you look up to see anton.

“do you want to get lunch? if you don't have any classes after this, of course. it'll be me and some of my friends, you can invite sky too if you want since i know you’re not very familiar with all of them” he says to you softly. You were kind of hungry now that he’s brought up food, and who would you be to deny a free meal?

“thank god you asked me, i'm starving. let me text sky to see if she wants to join” You get out of your seat and follow anton out of the classroom and to the dining hall.

you text sky to come to the dining hall, and that you'll be having lunch with anton. You tell her that wonbin will be there too knowing that she’ll get there faster than the speed of light. and you were right, once you and anton were turning the corner you could see sky out of breath as she came up to you.

“y/n!! no matter what i do, i just can't get my grade up higher than a c in chem! i don't know how anyone is passing that class, i swear i'm going to kill my professor- oh, hi anton!” sky is ranting to you while barely catching her breath, and then she realizes that anton was standing next to you. she gives him a smile, and then gives you a look.

if anton wasn’t right there, you would hit her and tell her to cut it out. You knew her look was a ‘he looks good’ type of look, and you didn't want him to pick up on her nonsense.

“hey sky, and who’s your chem professor? i heard mr.jung was a pain in the ass, one of my friends has him for chem too” you all make your way to where antons friends are sitting now, eying the group to see if anyone else you know is there.

“i have mr.jung! i swear im gonna kill myself if he doesn’t raise my grade.” sky pouts, and you all stand before the table, anton going to introduce you and sky to the group.

“guys this is y/n and sky” he raises his voice a bit so everyone can hear him, and everyone waves and says hi to you both. “y/n, sky, this is sohee, wonbin, sullyoon, and seunghan”

You already knew sohee and sullyoon, you all were partners in a project for bio last semester and got kind of close. and you didn’t know wonbin aside from sky thirsting over him for the last two years, showing you every little thing he posted on social media like he was some celebrity crush. and seunghan you weren’t too familiar with, could be simply because you don't have any classes with him in it and you don't know much of the friends anton has made since you two talked last.

you finally take a seat next to anton, sky and sohee sitting across from you. his friends are cool, you admit as you make good conversation with everyone at the table. you didn’t have a real friend group on campus, you mainly only talked to sky along with a few other people but they were all a part of different crowds. so it was nice that anton let you join in with his group of friends.

“do you want to get your food now? i can get it for you if you want to stay here,” anton leans over to talk to you, loud enough for only you to hear.

“no its fine ill come with” you turn to face him and you two let the table know you’re getting food and you’ll be right back.

you two grab trays and fill up your plates, now going to the line to pay for the food. You decide now you should quickly run over some rules about how this fake relationship is going to go, since you’re hanging out with his friends you don't want any suspicions about what your relationship with anton was.

“we’re keeping this whole thing a secret from our friends, right? ” you ask him, and he takes a moment to think before he responds.

“if you want to keep it a secret then sure, it might be weird to tell people that we’re faking a relationship, and that way we don't have to fake it in front of our friends” he lets out a soft laugh, and you nod in agreement.

“that’s true, telling sky that you’re my boyfriend would raise all kinds of hell”

Unfortunately, neither you or anton realized sohee was walking up behind you both and was able to pick up on the last bits of your conversation. intrigued, he butts in to stand in between you two. “hey guys, what's all this talk about boyfriend and girlfriend? You two dating?” he smirks, and you and anton stare at him and then at each other in shock.

this cannot be happening.

“What?” you let out a nervous chuckle “no, we’re not” it comes out faster than you can process, and you look at sohee with a smile hoping that he believes you. but he doesn't. not even a little bit.

he squints, giving you a look and then giving the same look to anton and then looking back at you. “You were just saying that anton was your boyfriend though.” you look past sohee to look at anton, he was paying for your food while you were being interrogated by sohee. Your body is heating up with anxiety, realizing nothing you say could get this boy to drop the topic. curse him for being so nosey.

“We just haven't told anyone yet, we didn’t want to make it a big deal.” anton chimes in before you could think of a reasonable response, and now you and sohee were looking at anton with wide eyes.

“this is great! we all thought there had to be something going on with you two,” he’s teasing you two now, and all you could do was sigh. this entire situation taking a sharp turn and you know that sohee was going to tell everyone, and there was no escape from being antons fake girlfriend.

Why did he have to tell sohee that you two were together? again, doing things without letting you know first. and he’s a bit of a loudmouth, so you know when he’s walking away that he’s going to tell the table that you two were together.

“What the fuck anton? Why did you do that” You whine, grabbing your food tray from him while you make your way back to the table.

You honestly don't even want to talk to him right now. You were annoyed, you were just agreeing that you two would keep it a secret?

anton follows close behind you, understanding your anger since he didn’t realize what he was saying until he said it. truthfully, his mind went into fight or flight for a moment. the easiest thing he could think of to get sohee to leave you two alone was to just give into what he was saying. obviously, he didn’t realize the gravity of his words until after the fact.

as you two approach the table, everyone is looking at you guys and smiling. You want to scream. this seriously cannot be my life.

“the love birds are back!!” Wonbin cheers, and the rest of the table follows along with whistles and cheers.

“y/n, why didn't you tell me! you had me thinking we hated him” sky pouts as you sit down, and antons ears perk up at this. you hated him? he took note in his mind to ask you about that later.

“you guys could have told us, y'know. we would have figured it out anyways. the tension is definitely there” sullyoon comments while she takes a bite of her food. the rest of the table nods in agreement, and you let out a small scoff.

What tension are they talking about? the few encounters with anton that you’ve had with him before this weekend were definitely tense, but only because it was awkward. Whatever tension they thought they felt was out of pure delusion.

You don't know how much more of this you could put up with.

the week went by slowly. almost too slow for your liking. it was finally friday, and your mom is texting you to come home for the weekend again, and to bring anton with you.

truthfully, you’ve been ignoring him all week. after that little stunt he pulled on monday, after you finished your food you lied and told everyone you had to get ready for your next class. it wasn’t a full lie since you did have a class, but it wasn't for another hour and a half. You just couldn't bear being at that table, and being around him. he texted you once you left to ask if you were alright, and you just gave him a simple ‘im fine’. he texted you again on tuesday, and then yesterday but you ignored them. You probably should respond, before he starts asking sky or sullyoon about you. and it would probably be a good idea to stop avoiding antons friends as well when you pass by them on campus. it wouldn’t be a good look for you or for anton, and you don't want to come off as rude to anyone

as you were packing some clothes along with your basic necessities to go to your moms house, your phone starts to ring. You walk over to where you set it to look at who was calling, and of course it was the person you were thinking about. You thought about declining it, but you decided to answer.

“What do you want, anton.” your voice was monotone and feigning annoyance, not really in the mood to talk to him.

“Um, are you doing anything right now?” he sounds nervous, and you decide maybe you should relax and talk to him calmly.

You might be upset with him right now, but you can’t be mean to him even if you tried. he was always sweet to you, so it wouldn’t be fair to talk to him like that if he wasn’t going to talk back.

“i’m just packing up some stuff to go to my moms. you’re going too, right? she wants to have a dinner or something, with us and your parents”

“yeah, that's why i called. im actually here to pick you up, it would be better if we showed up together than separately” he chuckles nervously and you hum in response.

“oh! okay well… i should hurry up then. i'll be outside in a few minutes.” you say quickly, and he lets out a soft ‘okay’ before ending the call. You shove everything into your little bag, not needing a lot since you already had things at your moms and you were only going to be there for the weekend. saying bye to sky, you put your shoes on and walk out to meet with anton outside.

once you push through the front doors of your apartment building, you see anton leaning on the door of his car while he waits for you. he sees you, and hurries to catch you and help you with your bag. it wasn't even a heavy bag, but the gesture was nice. and of course he’s opening the door to the passengers seat for you, making sure you’re fully seated before closing the door and making his way into the driver's seat.

he’s putting his seatbelt on when you decide to break the silence. “sorry for ignoring you all week. i was just kind of shaken by everything that happened monday” your voice is soft, playing with your fingers while you talk.

he doesn't say anything for a few seconds, and you start to wonder if he was mad at you. You couldn’t blame him, you would be mad if someone ignored you for a week too.

“it’s fine, i figured you wanted some space. i’m sorry i told sohee that we were dating, i kind of panicked and i didnt know how else to get him to leave us alone. and i didnt think he would go and tell everyone, so i’m sorry.”

“it’s okay, anton. i can't really be mad at you, because i don't even know if i would have said anything better than you did. it just caught me off guard” you’re looking at him now, shifting in the seat a bit so you weren't turning your neck too much. he looks at you and smiles softly, going back to looking at the road.

a comfortable silence fell between the two of you as he drove, the dreaded talk about monday relieving the awkward tension in the vehicle. as he turns into the neighborhood, you sigh knowing what's going to unfold once you step foot through the front door of your mothers house.

With the combination of your mom and antons mom being crazy about you two being together, you were glad that his dad was the only normal one. he was completely fine with you two just being good friends and you were so grateful for that. often, he would have to be the peacemaker in the room telling mrs.lee and your mom to calm down and let you two be.

“i think we should make some… ground rules for this whole thing. for now and for back on campus.” you state as he pulls into the driveway, and once he parks the car he shifts so he can face you.

“i agree, anything you have in mind?”

You two come up with some standard rules, some things are a hard no and some are subject to change.

rule #1- don't let anyone know its a fake relationship: it would be embarrassing if anyone knew that rule #2- keep it believable, but nothing extreme rule #3- adding onto number 2, keep the pda and flirting to a safe minimum, and no kissing rule #4- no dating/flirting with other people: fake or not, if people think you’re in a relationship do not try to get into another one. rule #5- anton owes you food for 3 months for putting you into this situation. its only fair! rule #6- the most important, do not catch feelings. You guys were just friends! two friends, pretending to date in front of your family and friends. it was all pretend though, no feelings were actually involved, right?

dinner went well, sitting next to anton while the adults talked about their own things and occasionally asking questions to the both of you. luckily not a lot of relationship topics were brought up. You two were able to have your own conversations throughout dinner, which reminded you of the dinners you all would have throughout your childhood.

once everyone was finished eating, anton helped your mother in the kitchen while you sat in the living room with his parents.

“y/n, i am so happy that you and anton are finally a couple! i feel like i’ve been waiting for this all my life” mrs.lee cheers, and you smile along with her. “isn't he just the sweetest boy?”

“he’s very sweet, probably the sweetest i’ve been with” you tell her and she's cheesing so hard. honestly, making the relationship believable wasn't going to be hard around mrs.lee and your mom, because you have no complaints about anton. he truly was the sweetest boy. even if you two weren’t really dating, he was respectful and very gentlemanly.

“We have his father to thank for that,” mrs.lee nudges at her husband, and he just gives a small chuckle at the comment.

“ i always taught him to be respectful. but truthfully the reason he’s so sweet to y/n is because he likes you” mr.lee starts, and you have to remember to not reject his words since you were trying to keep up an act here.

all you could do was let out an awkward laugh, not sure what to say to add onto the conversation. “maybe, but he’s sweet to everyone” you try to act humble, and mr.lee gives you a look that tells you that you were wrong.

“he may be nice to everyone, but i don't think you realize just how differently he treats you than anyone else. even when you two were younger and friends, he was always the nicest to you. and don't tell him i told you this, but he had a little crush on you back in middle and highschool.” he whispers the last part, and you feel your heart drop to your feet.

“h-he did? i had no idea…” words coming out soft now, you drop your head to stop the blood from rushing into your face.

“he would always come home and tell us about something you did that day. he got over it after a while, but i bet he’s so happy that you two are finally together!” mrs.lee swoons, and you suddenly feel lightheaded.

this is all too much. anton used to like you? how come he never said anything? You excused yourself from his parents, and made your way to the kitchen.

“hey mom, i’m a little tired so im gonna head upstairs.” You walk in to her drying and putting away dishes, while anton washes them. he looks over you, noticing the tone in your voice along with the look on your face wasn’t because of fatigue, but that something was wrong.

“okay baby, let me know if you need anything.” she walks to the end of the kitchen island where you were standing, giving you a hug goodnight. “anton, why don't you go with y/n upstairs? it's getting late, and i can finish up in the kitchen.” she turns from you to look at the boy scrubbing away at a pot, and he stops dead in his tracks at her words.

“i was just going to head back with my parents once we finished,” he starts, looking at your mom and then at you, not wanting to intrude. he did want to talk to you, but he didn’t want to be in your space if you didn't want him there.

“don't be silly, anton! You two are a couple and are old enough now, i don't have to separate you two” she laughs, and you and anton just stare at each other awkwardly. You were going to tell her to let it go, but because of the unique situation you two were in it was probably the best idea to follow your moms orders. You motion for him to follow you, you both saying goodnight to your mom and then to his parents. You’re walking towards the stairs to go to your room, when anton tells you that he’ll be back to get his bag out of his car.

While he grabs his things, you make your way up to your room. You leave the door open, just in case anton doesn't remember which room was yours. Walking to your window, you open it and stick your head out so you can get some fresh air.

What a night, you’re thinking to yourself. You need to calm down. With what happened on monday and what antons parents were telling you earlier, you were just too in your head. too much was happening too fast. Why was this affecting you so much? and with that you hear footsteps coming into your room and then a door closing.

“are you alright? You looked a little flushed downstairs” the soft voice calls to you, and you know that its anton.

You take a deep breath before turning to face him. “i'm fine. i am now, at least. i just kind of felt bad for lying right in my mom and your parents' faces. i had to get away from them” your voice is low while you speak, looking to the floor once again to avoid his eyes. he takes note of your body language, seeing that you’re a bit tense and awkward now but he doesn’t want to pry.

“if you want i can sleep on the floor,” he’s placing his bag on the chair by your desk, grabbing something to change into for bed.

“no, that's too uncomfortable. You can sleep on the bed” you say it in a way where its clear there's no room for debate, and he nods.

anton would never admit it to you, but he found you severely intimidating. even when you two were younger, he was always intimidated by you. You carried yourself well, you didn’t take bullshit from anyone, always got your way, and you were stubborn. he was surprised your personalities didn't clash, he felt like you wouldn't want to be friends with someone like him. but truthfully that's what brought you two together. it was like fire and ice, you were the fire and he was the ice to cool you down.

but with being the ice, he was too scared to touch you in fear that he would melt.

another week passes by, and you feel like you were going insane. You don't know what it is, but every time you see anton, your heart starts racing, your face heats up along with the rest of your body.

When he holds your hand or rests his hand on your thigh when you two were out with friends, you had to keep your composure to the best of your ability. especially when he would subconsciously graze his thumb across the back of your hand, the action small and going unnoticed to the naked eye, but feeling too intimate for you and you would pull your hand away.

the days that he would come over to your apartment or you would go to his dorm to hang out after classes, you found yourself feeling nervous. especially when you two were at your place, seeing him in your room and in your bed had you feeling like jelly. sometimes he would fall asleep before you, and you wouldn’t wake him up. it would be late, and you would feel bad for waking him up and making him go back to his dorm. You were comfortable enough around him anyways to tell him to move, and he never slept too close to you throughout those nights. a deep part of you wished he did, though. but you don't want to think about crossing that path yet.

a few more days passed, and on wednesday, you went with him to his swim practice so you two could go back to your apartment and order takeout once he was finished. You brought a book with you since you didn’t know much about swimming, and you wanted to keep yourself occupied while you waited.

an hour of practice goes by and lets just say, not a single page of the book you brought with you was read. not like you would be able to focus on reading anyways, seeing how he swam in the water was a lot more entertaining than you thought. along with how he looked when he pushed himself out of the water, full body on display. his broad shoulders, his toned arms and stomach, the droplets of water dripping from his hair down his back, the way he throws his head back to move his hair out of his face-

Wait a damn minute.

You needed to leave, feeling hot suddenly. Were you really sitting here thirsting over anton? of course, you always found him attractive. You would be silly if you didn't. but you never had any thoughts about him. and you don't want right now, in the campus pool, to be where you start. You walk down the bleachers, trying to think of an excuse of why you’re leaving the building.

“y/n? are you leaving?” anton catches you before you could find him, you turn around to see him speed walking towards you and you almost let out a giggle seeing he hasn't taken his goggles off.

“it’s just kind of humid in here. i'm gonna sit outside until you finish, okay?” you clutch your bag a bit tighter, him standing wet and shirtless in front of you is making you nervous. he’s peering down at you, smiling lightly before he lets you know he’ll be out in around 30 minutes.

You nearly trip on your way out, feeling refreshed once you finally escape the pool room air. You take your phone out of your pocket, debating on texting sky. she didn’t know that you and antons relationship was all a facade, so what exactly could you tell her? should you just tell her the truth? You couldn't do that, that would be breaking the rules. and who knows what she would do if she found out. You had to mask it with something else in order to get your feelings off your chest.

You: sky You: sky pls You: i'm going insane sky: what what what You: okay so… yk me and anton sky: i’m aware You: well we’ve been together for about two weeks and some days You: and there's been some tension You: that wasn't there before sky: like sexual? sky: you havent fucked that boy yet? You: omfg You: no! we haven't gotten there yet… sky: so ur telling me, you've been dating a fine ass man… sky: and you havent fucked him… for what reason? sky: better than me y/n… i would have been jumped his bones You: sky you are so unserious You: but help me out here! do i tell him? or do i just go for it sky: i say talk to him first because what if he isn't ready You: ur so right sky ily sky: lyt babes ;)

Using sex fantasies as a mask for your feelings was definitely a choice, but it helped you out regardless. of course, now you have more things to think about. did you really want to date anton? You told yourself you didn't before, but now you weren't so sure. he was the full package, everything you could ask for in a guy. so there was really nothing stopping you. but you two were friends.

he also used to like you back in grade school. key word: used to. What if he completely got over you and wouldn’t even think about dating you now? this was a tough situation, and you don't know how much longer you could keep this up with repressed feelings.

after 10 more minutes of overthinking, you can feel a presence behind you so you quickly turn your body to see anton right behind you.

“You ready?” he’s looking down at you again, hair slightly covering his eyes because of the beanie he wore. his body once again covered up by the baggy hoodie along with the black sweatpants he wore. You would never be able to guess how built he really was under the clothes he chose to wear.

You realize you might be staring a little too hard for a little too long so you give him a nod. “Yeah, let's go” and he’s taking you by the hand while you follow him to his car.

he drives you two to the nearest food place you guys could agree on. You two agree on getting wings for tonight, and then make your way to your apartment. once you enter, you see sky sitting in the living room. she gives you a look only you two would be able to understand, with anton right behind you.

sky greets you two, and anton greets her back while you take off your shoes and then make your way into the kitchen. You grab two sodas, and walk out to where anton was standing. he was usually a bit awkward around your apartment if you weren’t telling him where to go, too scared that he would touch something he shouldn’t.

following you to your room with the food, anton shuts the door softly behind him. the boy was already in comfortable clothes, taking a shower before he left the locker rooms after practice and made sure that he brought something he wouldn't be uncomfortable in. You were still wearing a pair of jeans and a cute crop top under a zip up hoodie.

“i'm gonna change in the bathroom, you can pull the food out and put something on the tv,” you tell the boy sitting on your bed, and he hums in response while you leave the room. Walking over to the bathroom down the hall, you take this time to relax yourself.

You quickly change into a pair of sweats and an old tshirt, and you walk further down the hall to the living room to quickly talk to sky.

“are you fucking him tonight? let me know so i can put in my headpho- ow!” you pinched her arm before she could finish her sentence.

“i am not fucking him! i just came out here to tell you that i'm gonna talk to him about it”

“okay, but if there's a change of plans let me know!”

truthfully you were going to tell him about your feelings, just not tonight. maybe friday, you got invited to a party that sohee was throwing at his frat and you know that anton will be there too.

You walk back into your room now, seeing the food laid out and a movie ready for you as you get situated next to anton on your bed. he put on some action movie, which was a genre you both equally enjoyed. being around anton was comfortable. You two were able to sit in silence, laugh, and talk without any judgments.

this could either end really good or really, really bad.

it was friday. the day you would tell anton about your feelings. Was it a good idea to tell him at a party? probably not, but the influence of alcohol might help you build up the much needed courage. What could possibly go wrong though, right? the worst he could say is no, and you two could just go back to being friends and drop the fake dating act.

You put on your best party dress, it was black and had the right amount of cleavage and rode up just enough for it to not be too skimpy. knowing how crazy sohee’s parties get, you wanted to make sure that you were dressed for the occasion along with getting antons attention.

sky calls you over, letting you know she’s ready to go. You ride in her car to the party, she’s known as the designated driver for you and your friends since she was the only one who didn't like to drink. What would you do without her?

right as you walk into the house, seunghan is at the door handing you a shot glass. You down it without question, making a face at the liquid burning down your throat. You would love to get absolutely shitfaced right now, but you want to find anton. You’re pushing through the crowd of people before you see him, he’s standing close to the patio window, red solo cup in hand while he talks to sohee and some other guys you’re not familiar with.

“hey anton,” you look at him happily, and he doesn’t even glance at you while he continues his conversation. Weird, he’s never blatantly ignored you like that, but maybe he thought you were someone else. You call him again and he finally looks at you. he glances at your outfit and then back to your face, little to no reaction to your presence.

“hi y/n” he looks at you with a look you can’t quite decipher, and you feel a slight tinge of pain in your chest at this. why was he suddenly so emotionless around you? was he drunk? “can i talk to you, it'll be quick?” he says loud enough for just you to hear, and he excuses himself from his friends while he leads you to a quiet, dimly lit hallway.

“What's up?”

and that's when he lays it on you.

“i think that we should end this.”

You nearly drop to your knees when you hear those words come out of his mouth. “huh?” is all you could muster up, playing it off as you couldn't hear him due to the party.

“this whole fake dating thing, i think we should end it. We’re just friends, right? not like we have feelings for each other or anything… and it’s just too much work and pressure to keep up with a fake relationship” he’s not looking at you now, and all you can do is stand there in shock.

it takes a minute for your brain to start working again, finally able to process your own thoughts and words.

“right. You’re right. i guess it’s for the best if we end it. i’ll um, i’ll see you around” and you’re walking away so fast anton didn't have a chance to say anything else and to stop yourself from crying in front of everyone at this party. You quickly find sky, interrupting her flirt session with wonbin to tell her you guys need to go. she’s holding your hand tight through the crowd and out the door, and once you’re in her car you’re letting it all out. the sobs are uncontrollable now, everything you held in 3 minutes ago just coming out.

You tell sky everything on the way home, feeling like there was no reason to keep anything a secret anymore. “that asshole! i’ll kill him, i really will” sky is heated now, she couldn’t stand seeing you like this and she couldn’t stand knowing who made you like this.

“he’s never talked to me like that. even when he’s annoyed at me! he’s never looked at me with absolutely no emotion… i don't understand what happened” you start to think out loud once you two are inside your apartment, tears dried and the confusion settling in. you’re pacing around the living room and you feel your phone vibrate in your purse. You pull it out to see anton calling you, and you press decline.

Whatever he has to say, you don't want to hear it. You should have known not to say anything. maybe if you had just waited until tomorrow. but if he wanted to end things, what would he have done if you confessed?

sky's phone was ringing now, she picks it up and is nearly yelling into her phone the second she presses answer.

“hello?... Yes, we’re fine. What the fuck is up with anton, man?…okay… i don't think that's going to happen for a while… okay bye.” she sets her phone down, and her eyes soften as she watches you continue to pace the living room. “that was wonbin on the phone, he said anton was a little drunk and he wants to talk to you when you can. they’re trying to sober him up now because he started drinking more after we left. What an idiot,” she’s next to you now, rubbing circles on your back while you stare at the wall.

Yeah, what an idiot. the both of you were idiots, it seems.

another week goes by, and you’ve completely shut everyone out. You ignore texts, you skip classes, you don't even leave the apartment to get food. thank goodness for doordash.

You check your phone, looking at all of the missed calls and messages from the people worried about you. one name sticks out the most, but that's the one name you don't want to talk to right now. avoiding him like he was the plague, along with any of his friends to make sure that he doesn’t hear about you.

Unknown information to you, but sky was out. she was out with the enemy, to be more specific. she had seen anton in the courtyard with wonbin and seunghan, and she made a beeline for the boy. he noticed her almost instantly, preparing for a well deserved lashing or maybe even a slap to the face, but she grabbed him by his forearm and dragged him to a quiet side of the courtyard where she could talk freely.

“You really fucked up, anton.” she's speaking softly. “she hasnt left her room in 5 days. i don't know what to do to get her out.”

“i’ve tried texting and calling her every day, but she doesn't respond.” his voice quieter than usual as he tries to explain himself.

“well can you blame her? you shut her feelings down before she could even get them out!” she’s quick to your defense, which was one of the reasons you loved sky. she always had your back.

“i… it's not like i don't have feelings for her, because shit, i’ve liked that girl since we were 13. but i didn't know that she felt the same way and i was too scared to ruin our friendship” he wanted to cry, ruining something that he wanted so badly with his own thoughts.

he knew that the fake dating would resurface old feelings, but along with the feelings came the other emotions that come with liking you. he was nervous around you, he was too scared that you wouldn’t like him back and that you were only doing this because he put you in this situation. Which was another reason he was too nervous to confess, because this relationship was fake. You two were friends who were just pretending to date. and neither of you were getting anything out of it, so why would you develop romantic feelings for him? he didn't think you liked him, and to protect his heart he had to let you go. but the moment he saw your face drop at that party with tears threatening to fall, he knew he made a mistake. he never wanted to see you make that face again, especially not if it was caused by him.

“You could have maybe asked her how she felt about you two before you just acted on a made up scenario in your head? like do you even think before you say things…” her voice is filled with confusion and annoyance, not understanding how someone could sabotage their own relationships the way he was. and you’re her best friend, so she felt obligated to get some answers for you.

“i was in panic mode! i couldn’t handle being her fake boyfriend anymore when i wanted to be with her for real. do you think she’ll hear me out?” if he had to get on his knees and beg you to give him another chance, he would. he couldn't bear not being with you, and he felt like he’d rather crawl into a corner and die than living his life without you again.

“i don't know, she’s doing everything in her power to avoid you right now. but you better fix this mess or i'll have your head on a stick” she smiles at the end of her threat, reaching to pat anton on the head before walking way.

he was going to make things right.

With a deep breath, anton is knocking on your front door. You were eating some leftovers from some food you ordered the day before, not bothering to order food today. sky must have forgotten her keys again, you think as you walk over to the front door.

“sky you can't keep forgetting your ke- oh.” the one person you dreaded seeing is standing at your door with a bouquet of flowers, and a bag of your favorite candy. if you weren't so upset right now, you probably would have swooned over him coming over unannounced.

“can we talk?” he takes in your appearance, you were wearing a hoodie along with a pair of shorts and slippers. You wouldn't say you looked a mess, but you would have put yourself together a bit more if you had known that anyone other than sky would see you today. his eyes are soft, filled with hope that you’ll let him in.

“i don't really want to talk to you right now” your face is blank, not wanting to show any sort of emotions. You could honestly cry, but you had to stay strong for yourself.

“please? it's really important,” it almost comes out as a plea, and you nearly drop the cold act. seeing him at your door like this, maybe you should let him in? not that you wanted to hear whatever he has to say, but he came all this way.

“fine, but make it quick” grabbing the flowers and candy from him, you let him in and you go to the kitchen to put the flowers in a vase. he sits on the end of your couch, and he's tapping his fingers on his knees while he waits for you to walk into the living room.

When you’re seated on the other end of the couch, you peer your head over to look at anton, who was almost visibly shaking from nervousness.

“okay, what do you want?” the cold act is back, wanting to hear him out before you fold. the gesture of him coming with flowers kind of gave away what was coming from him, but you didn't want to get excited too fast. he hurt your feelings last week, and you weren’t going to let it run past you that easily just because he came to you pleading with flowers. You could, and hell you definitely wanted to, but you were stronger than that.

something about anton made you so weak. normally a strong stubborn person, melting and giving in to whatever he says. You don't know how he could have this effect on you, no one else is able to make you putty in their hands the way anton does. but you can't let him know that. not now, at least.

“i need to apologize for everything. not just for last week, but for putting you into this situation in the first place. when this all started, our moms setting us up like that, i didnt think much of it. but then hanging out with you that day brought back so many memories and i didnt want to stray away from you again. so i lied to my mom, and then i brought up the fake dating idea to you. You probably never knew this, but i’ve had a crush on you since we were in middle school. it went away in junior year when we stopped talking, because you had gotten a boyfriend and i was so upset that you were with someone else. i was too scared to confess to you then, and even now i'm terrified. talking to you again resurfaced all of my old feelings for you and i thought that us being in a fake relationship would bring us closer together. and then i panicked, because i thought you wouldn't like me back. We were getting so close and i was too scared of rejection, i couldn’t tell if you had any feelings for me in that way, so i thought ending it now would stop me from getting hurt” he pauses, and you take in everything he’s saying.

tears that you tried to fight back were falling, you couldn't stop them while you listened to every word the boy beside you said knowing that he was being completely genuine. You could barely look at him, seeing that he looked like he was fighting back tears himself.

“and seeing you at the party, i was planning on talking to you after the party but you looked so pretty i knew i wouldn't be able to stick by your side as a fake boyfriend when all i wanted was to be your real boyfriend. i didn't mean to hurt you, seriously. it nearly killed me when i saw you look at me so heartbroken. i never want to make you upset like that again.“ he was crying too now, and somehow the two of you were no longer on either side of the couch but right in the middle. not touching, but close enough to feel each other's presence. after a minute of calming yourself down, you try to find the right words to say to the boy next to you.

“You’re an idiot, lee anton” is all you could muster up, almost laughing. You sniffle, and you look at anton while he still has his head down. “You’re really an idiot, because how could i not like you back? i’ve never been around a guy as sweet as you, and i might not have seen it a couple years ago but i see it now. Y’know, the other weekend when we were at my moms and you were helping clean up… your parents had told me about your old crush on me. that’s why i was so shaken up, because i was starting to realize my own feelings for you.” he’s finally looking at you now, tears wiped away and an almost smile on his face.

“they told you about that? i wanted to be the one to tell you” his face was a bright red from embarrassment, his parents exposing his past crush on you was not something he would expect from them. And the fact that you weren’t repulsed by his old crush caught him off guard. Of course, you have feelings for him now, but knowing that he liked you when you two were cringey teenagers? You should be laughing at him and calling him crazy.

“ after all the times i friendzoned you during that time? i don't know how you did it. i guess i deserved the rejection last friday as a payback from all the times i shut you down.” humoring the situation was the best thing you could do to ease the tension in the room, and you both chuckle softly at your comment.

he takes your hand into his, shifting his body so hes completely facing you, and you look down at your hands before looking back at his face. he was back to looking serious, with those soft pleading eyes burning into yours.

“y/n, i want you to know that i like you. i like you so much, it physically hurts. i never want to be away from you, and i never want to hurt you. and i want us to be together, for real this time. no bullshit, no rules, no more confusion. You’re the most amazing girl in the world and i can't imagine living a life without you in it. if you’ll let me, can i be your boyfriend?” you want to cry again, this was the cutest confession you’ve ever heard. You take a little bit too long to respond and his mouth is slowly turning into a frown, thinking he's about to be rejected.

“Yes, anton. You can be my boyfriend” you squeeze his hand and now he’s tearing up again. he feels like the happiest person on the planet, finally getting to be with you in the way he wanted. Happy tears stream down your face, and you pull anton into a hug, holding him tightly. He holds you just as tight, breath hitting your neck as he breathes in the scent of your neck.

“We need to go out and celebrate! I wanna take you out, on a real date, and then we can tell everyone that we’re officially together, and-” He had pulled out of your hug so he could list off everything he wanted to do with you, and you had to put your hands on his shoulders to keep him grounded. Even though you love his rambling, his words were coming out quicker than his thoughts and you had to calm him down.

“Woah, let's just hang out tonight? We can go out tomorrow. And we should wait to tell everyone, sky probably still wants to rip your head off and we don't need sohee or anyone else talking” he nods, and he’s still smiling from ear to ear while he looks at you.

“You’re right, i'm just so happy.” he has his hands on your knees now, and his eyes go from where his hands lay, your lips, and your eyes. You trail your eyes to his lips and to his neck, then back at his lips. It was like you both wanted the same thing, but both were too shy to say something. Subconsciously you were slowly closing the gap, his body leaning into yours as well. Noses almost touching, you look into his eyes and give his shoulder a small squeeze to motion him to make a move.

“Can i kiss you?” you can feel the words leaving his lips on your own, and a small desperate please leaves you before the gap is finally closed and his lips are on yours. It was a soft kiss, the both of you getting used to each other. His lips were so soft, and they molded perfectly with yours. You felt his tongue swipe your bottom lip, and you let him into your mouth while you kissed him harder. His hands that were on your knees have moved, one hand resting on your hip while the other made it up your body and cupping the back of your neck to keep you on him. Your hands also snake into his hair, playing with the strands while you two softly make out.

Anton felt like he was in heaven. Kissing you was a dream come true, and it topped anything he could ever imagine. He kissed you softly but full of desperation, like you were going to vanish out of thin air. His grip on your waist got tighter, slightly pulling your body into his and you gasped into his mouth. Pulling away, you look at how dazed anton was. he’s breathing hard, lips swollen and hair disheveled. You didn’t mean to work him up so much from just kissing you, but you can't deny that you weren’t a little worked up yourself. Kissing him was like something you’ve never felt before. A kiss filled with love and desperation was something you haven’t felt before, and it was something you hope you never get used to. You want to kiss him like that every time, all the time.

“Do you want to go to my room?” you breathe out, and he nods his head happily. You stand up, grabbing his hand to bring you to his room.

Your body was heating up, feeling slightly nervous. He’s been in your room before, but as your boyfriend? It was like something in the air shifted. A new tension filled the room once you two stepped inside your room, you closed the door softly before antons hands were on you and pressing your body to the door. You gasp at his sudden control, looking up at him and you see how dark his eyes have gotten. With one hand on your waist and one on the back of your neck, he pulls you in for another kiss. It wasn’t soft like before but still filled with desperation, like he was starved of your lips. Your hands move to his hair and onto his bicep, gripping his arm to hold yourself up while he kisses you eagerly.

He’s strong enough to keep you up himself, but you feel like if you don't hold tightly to him you would melt. The hand on your waist pulls you into him some more, and he’s moving you both from the door to your bed. It was a bit of a struggle getting there, neither of you pulling away to see where you were going. Stumbling on each other's feet, you finally make it to the bed. Only pulling away so he could let you down softly, and you move back to the end of the bed before he’s climbing on top of you. Slotting his own legs between yours, his lips are attaching to your neck and you move your head to the side so he has better access.

You can't ignore the way his thigh is right on your core, not moving but you feel the heat between your legs with how he’s sucking and biting little marks on your neck. His hands rest on your waist under the hoodie you wore, and you lift them just slightly to get a tiny bit of friction going. With every gasp and whimper you let out, it goes through his ears and straight to his dick.

Anton feels you moving, and your own leg that was between his was just right below his growing hard on. He shifts so both his legs are between yours, pressing his core into yours and you let out a moan at the pressure.

You pull at his hair, taking your other hand to run it down his chest and down to his stomach. When your hands stop by his waist,tugging at his shirt indicating that you want it off. “Anton, take your shirt off” you groan out, noticing how he’s too lost in you to notice.

He quickly pulls away, lips and hands leaving your body. You almost felt cold, not having his body heat on you for those quick seconds. He’s sitting up so he can remove his shirt and you stare him down intently as you watch his muscles flex. Biting your lip, you run your hand down his bare chest, taking in the body above you.

“Can i take this off you?” he’s tugging on your hoodie now, and you nod before he helps you sit up slightly to remove the clothing off you before laying you back down. He gasps when he realizes you didn’t have a bra on this whole time, and he instantly attaches his hands to your breasts and gives them a squeeze. You would think this was his first time seeing a woman naked the way he gawks at you, but he’s just so in awe of how beautiful you were.

Leaning back down, his lips are back on yours. It's hot and messy, you can barely breathe the way he touches you. His kisses are trailing back down to your neck, and then his lips find your nipple. You whimper feeling his tongue flick the sensitive bud, one hand tweaking the other. His other hand makes its way down to the hem of your shorts, slightly dipping into your shorts but not enough. Like he was waiting for you to tell him what to do, he left his fingers right there even if you rutted your hips into his hand as a way to get him to touch you. He still wasn't letting up, and you knew that he really wasn't going to touch you unless you told him.

“Anton,” you whine, and he takes his lips off your nipple. His breath on the bud making you shiver, and you whine out again.

“What's wrong, baby?” You couldn’t tell if his voice was laced with fake or genuine concern, and it was killing you. You were probably fully soaked through your panties and shorts, the ache between your thighs getting almost unbearable.

“Want you to touch me” a whine slips past your lips, and you move the hand that was on his chest over where his own rests under the hem of your shorts.

“Yeah?” he teases, finally putting his hand fully down your pants to rub you through your panties. You let out an eager mhm along with a fast nod, his fingers lightly grazing over your clit. You try to lift your hips up, but he takes his free hand to hold your hips down. “Gonna take my time with you, baby”

Moaning at his words, you moan again when his fingers finally slip past your panties and run through your slit. Collecting your arousal on his fingers, and he lets out a soft chuckle. “You’re so wet,”

“Stop teasing, ton. Need you” you swirl your hips around his fingers, trying to get him to use them. He might be putty in your hands outside the bedroom, but it was the complete opposite right now. He likes seeing you like this. Weak under him, begging for some type of release. He finally obliges, his thumb circling your clit softly while he slips two fingers into you. You moan, the ache in your core slowly subsiding.

He sits up so he can see your reactions fully. Your eyes were fluttering shut, mouth open slightly from the pleasure he was giving you. He moved his fingers a bit faster, and adding a bit more pressure onto your clit which made you moan. Your hand that was on his wrist gripped him tightly. He was making you feel so good, and he looked so good while doing it. With your half open eyes, you could see him focused on your cunt. His eyes were glossed over, looking from his hand that was in your pants, your face, your tits, then back to his hand.

He could honestly cum in his pants from the sight. Your breathing was labored and you were clenching on his fingers tighter, and he could tell that you were getting close. You usually last longer, but he made you feel so good it was overwhelming. And with how hot he was, it was hard for you to hold out.

“Cum for me, y/n. Make a mess on my fingers” His words were so vulgar, but his voice was so soft. With a few more harsh circles to your clit, your back was arched off the bed while your orgasm hit you. Nails digging into antons wrist while he continued thrusting his fingers in you to help you ride out your orgasm. Other hand was in the sheets, grabbing onto whatever your fingers could pick up.

When your breathing goes back to normal, anton pulls his fingers out of you and out of your pants, taking them into his mouth. It was so messy, and you moan watching him taste you on his fingers. He hums, pulling his fingers out of his mouth with a pop before running his hands down your thighs.

“You okay?” for a quick minute the soft boyfriend you knew was back, checking to make sure you were okay and if you wanted to continue. You give him a weak nod, eyes struggling to stay open. Your hands are pulling at the hem of his pants now, and he’s stepping off the bed to rid himself of the last of his clothing.

Through your half hazy gaze, you watch him taking off his pants along with his boxers. Your eyes nearly fall out of their sockets when you see his cock spring out of his pants. Holy shit, he was big. You knew he would be because he was just so big everywhere else, but it still took you by surprise. He gets back on the bed, settling between your legs once again.

“How do you want me?” you ask him sweetly, and he bites his lip at the question. He hadn’t thought about it, and now he was thinking of all the possibilities of how he could fuck you right now. He placed his hands on your legs, lifting them so they could wrap around his waist.

“Just stay like this,” he leans down so he's a bit closer to your face, but not close enough for you to kiss him. His lips were slightly parted and his breathing was heavy, and you wanted to kiss him so badly. He almost seems nervous. Which would be insane with the way he made you cum just a few minutes ago. You grab him by the back of his neck to pull him to your lips, and you can feel the way he softens in your hold.

Your other hand snakes its way between the two of you, grabbing onto his cock softly. He tenses up again, a choked moan comes out before he can process the noises coming out of him. You stroke him slowly while he struggles to kiss you back, and you bite his lip as you pull away.

“Need you now, toni” you whisper on his lips, and you look into his eyes before he’s sitting up once again. He groans while he pumps himself a few more times, and then he’s pressing his tip into you.

The both of you let out a moan while he’s pushing himself into you, and you bring both arms up to wrap around his forearms. It takes a minute before he's fully sheathed into you, and when he is you feel so full.

“let me know if it's too much, okay?” His hands grip your waist, and all you nod in response.

“Dont worry. I can take it.” you say confidently and he gives you a sly look before he pulls out almost completely, and then thrusts back in with a slow but deep thrust. He hisses, your pussy clenching around him so tightly. One of his hands moves from your waist up your chest, stopping at your breasts to play with one of your nipples while he finds his rhythm inside of you. The stimulation in both areas makes you cry out, your grip on antons arm getting impossibly tighter.

He was still processing the fact that you were under him. It was an unreal situation. Never did he think he’d be able to get the girl he’s always wanted. never did he think he would be in her room. Never did he think he would be having sex with her.

His pace picks up, your body jerking forward with each thrust. You could barely keep your eyes open, but the view in front of you was too good to miss. The way the muscles in his arms flexed when he drove his hips into yours, and you could see how his stomach contracted with each thrust. His eyes were focused on where the two of you connected while you stared at him, and your moans got increasingly louder with every touch and with every thrust.

You bring a hand down to your clit, drawing circles on the sensitive area while he fucked you. He was moaning louder now, soft whimpers leaving him every time you clenched around him.

“You’re so tight, baby” he’s leaning over you now, moving your hand from your clit and pinning it to your side. He swiftly takes his other hand and places his own fingers on your clit, and you nearly scream, the amount of pressure and speed he adds has your eyes rolling back.

He couldn’t get enough of you. If he put his hands somewhere, it would only be for a few seconds before he was moving them to a different part of your body. The hand he used to pin you down was now grabbing onto your thigh, hiking your leg up so he could put it over his shoulder.

The new angle had his cock hitting a spot deep inside you that you didn’t know existed, and you bite your lip to stop another scream from coming out. His other hand was still in between your bodies, rubbing your clit with a swiftness. Your hand goes to his chest, subconsciously pushing him from the stimulation.

“thought you could take it, baby. need me to slow down?” He teases, and his thrusts falter just enough for you to feel it and beg for more. Fingers still on your clit, pushing hard on the bud but not moving them. You could barely think of words to say, but the loss of stimulation was helping you gain consciousness.

“n-no! feelsso good… gna cum” tears swelling up in your eyes, you slur your words trying to tell him that he could keep going. you were so close, and you didn't want his teasing to rip the feeling of your orgasm bubbling going away, so you hoped he would continue the pace and send you over the edge soon.

pushing you into the mattress, he thrusts hard and the tears that glossed over your eyes were now falling down, the pleasure was so overwhelming. with the way he was pressing into you, the way he looked into your eyes with each thrust and you struggled to keep them open, the way his fingers expertly handled your clit while his lips hovered over yours, and the sweet words on how good you felt while you could only whine and babble incoherent words, you were so close to hitting your peak.

“cum for me baby, i got you” and with that your body almost caves in on itself, your orgasm hitting you like a truck. your legs were shaking and your back would have arched completely off the bed if it weren't for anton above you, still fucking you sensless to help you ride it out. a choked sob leaves your lips, too breathless to let out any moans. it quickly became overstimulating, pushing at whatever body parts your hands could reach. He wasn’t letting up though, chasing his own high now and was lost in the feeling of your pussy squeezing him deliciously.

“toni, s’too much! too much,” you whine, and the boy removes his fingers off your clit to lift himself up. he brings your leg down from his shoulder, and keeps it around his waist with your other leg. he’s still fucking you, and its still a lot but without the abuse to your clit you could tolerate the feeling of his cock fucking into you some more until he cums. His eyes were shut now leaning back down to bury his face into your neck. your hands wrap around him, running your fingers through his hair and leaving gentle tugs which elicit loud moans out of him

“tell me where to cum, baby. where do you want it?” his voice is rushed, and you know you’d have to think fast because he was a ticking time bomb.

“wherever you want toni,” your hands leave his hair so you could move him from your neck and cup his face, giving him a loving look before pulling him into a heated kiss, teeth clashing and lip biting. you slip your tongue into his mouth, swirling around with his while you two moan into each other. with a few sharp thrusts, he’s cumming inside of you. his hips still for a moment, your pussy milking his cock of every last drop of cum. he lets out a weak whimper, body feeling weak as he fucks his cum into you.

you moan, body feeling warm from his body heat along with the fullness of his cock and his cum inside of you. the both of you let out small groans when he’s pulling out, his body still on top of yours. he gives you a soft kiss to your forehead, and you give him a weak smile.

“did so well for me baby. was it okay?” his soft persona was back in full effect now, sitting up so he could help you get cleaned up.

“more than okay, anton”

he gives you a quick kiss before he’s hopping off the bed and finding his clothes on the floor. he puts his boxers on and his pants, then leaves your room quietly to go to the kitchen. When he turns the corner, he’s met with sky. she has headphones in so she doesn't notice him at first, but once she feels his presence she nearly jumps. then her startled face turns into disgust.

“you two are fucking nasty. when i told you to fix things between you two, i didn't mean come here and break the sound barrier.” she rolls her eyes, going back to fixing herself a snack.

“sorry,” an awkward chuckle leaves anton, and he quickly grabs a water out of the refrigerator and leaves the kitchen, slightly embarrassed by the confrontation. he makes his way back down the hall to go to your bathroom, and he rinses his face with cold water, still warm from your little activity just a few minutes ago. he runs one of your washcloths under warm water, and then he’s back in your room to clean you up. sitting down in front of you, he wipes you up in the places you were most sweaty, and then wiping your thighs and carefully wiping up the cum that was dripping out of you. you were still sensitive, wincing at the contact. he helps you sit up, and you run a hand through his hair. you reach over the edge of the bed to grab your hoodie off the floor, slipping it back on. suddenly feeling a little too bare in front of anton since he at least had on a pair of pants.

You admire the boy in front of you. He was the same, but different to you now. a sweet, beautiful boy, who was now all yours. a sweet boy who just fucked you to oblivion. a beautiful boy, who could put up with your attitude. who was weak for you, who would do anything for you. it makes you smile, the most perfect boy liked you and only you. and he was there your whole life, you two just had to figure it out on your own.

“i ran into sky in the kitchen,” his voice was low as he handed you the water he brought, and your eyes widened in shock that your friend was home. you didn’t think she would be home by this time, usually staying out until nighttime at the library before she came home.

“oh god, i didn't know she would be home this early. we’re never going to hear the end of this.” you whine, head in your hands. anton laughs, finding your reaction adorable. as embarrassing as it was to have someone hear you from the outside of your bedroom, he didn't have that much shame. the fact that you were loud enough to disturb the peace in the other room filled him with pride.

“she’ll be okay. this won't be the last time she hears anything come out of this room anyways” he gives you a cheeky grin, and you scoff before slapping his shoulder. who would have thought he would be so dirty?

“don't say that!! we’re gonna have to keep quiet if she’s home,”

“we’ll see about that. you talk a big game but you crumbled the second i put it in” he’s still grinning at you, saying it with such pride and you slap his arm again, face heating up at his words. now you have two things that you’ll never be able to live down.

“you’re sick, lee anton” you whine, and he just laughs before pulling you into a bear hug and laying the two of you onto the pillows. you two get comfortable fast, your back resting against his chest while his arms rest over your body after he pulls the covers over you two

“you like it though” he nuzzles into your neck, spooning you and rubbing soft circles on your stomach under your hoodie.

“maybe just a little”

while spending the rest of the night cuddling, you think that both of your moms were right about setting you two up. you’re suddenly grateful about that surprise ‘blind’ date, and that your mom was right about giving him a chance. laying with him just felt right. and you hope that you can lay with him forever.

A/N: let me know what you guys think !! i kind of half assed the editing, so i apologize if there's any errors + i know the capitalization is a little wacky throughout the fic. i hope you guys enjoyed this fic as much as i enjoyed writing it :)

💋 nav

#anton riize #riize smut #riize x reader #anton imagines #anton smut #anton x reader #riize anton #riize imagines #riize fanfic #riize fluff #lee anton #anton fluff #lee anton x reader #lee anton smut #lee anton fluff #lee anton imagines #toniiswrld #riize

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clairdelunelove · 1 year

Text

Things Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley Finds Attractive About You Pt.II

simon 'ghost' riley x reader, mentions of soap, price, gaz, and alejandro

genre: fluff

warnings: slightly suggestive, cursing

synopsis: a couple more cute quirks that you possess that ghost can’t get enough of! headcanon edition!

a.n. was this on your christmas list?? if it was then santa’s back in town babes :P but seriously, I hope that the holidays have been treating you well. stay warm! if you can, pls consider checking out my kofi and thank you for your continued support <3

when you glance at him and smile

you were doing it again

it was the fifth time ghost caught your bright eyes glancing in his direction

and it wouldn’t have come to his attention, after all eye contact was given in accordance to common courtesy if you were discussing matters with someone, but you were lounging halfway across the room

ghost sat alone at the main table

a couple members surrounded you,, occupied in light banter and small talk

alejandro lightly nudged your shoulder, murmuring a casual joke that has soap roaring in laughter

their boisterous voices carry throughout the room which causes ghost to peer up at them

he couldn’t afford to lose concentration,, needing this alone time to debrief about the previous mission (i.e. which formation was most efficient, how many soldiers he still had left, if there were enough food rations)

but

taking a sneak peek couldn’t hurt

fiddling with the strap of his holster, he wordlessly tightens the garment along his waist and watches as the corners of your lips curl into a polite smile while engaging in small talk with the group

he spots soap place a gentle hand on your shoulder, the male twisting himself closer to you, as a way to balance himself while heaving over in laughter at another quip that alejandro shares

before he can think better of it, a ragged breath leaves ghost’s lips at soap’s blatant display of physical affection toward you

fortunately unfortunately his balaclava doesn’t muffle the noise of disdain which causes soap’s attention to snap to him

“somethin’ you want to add, Lt.?” soap challenges with a raised brow, “might need to come closer so we can hear ya.”

soap graces a sly smirk, inadvertently mentioning how ghost was literally the only one that strayed away by being halfway across the room

and soap’s attempt at pestering the other male is glaringly obvious,, especially from the way his hand still lingers around your shoulder

there’s a soft chorus of chuckles that erupt from the rest of the members but you simply await the lieutenant's reaction to the lighthearted prod

ghost doesn’t take the bait though

“I’ll bear it in mind,” he bluntly acknowledges while readjusting in his seat

he wasn’t entirely against the idea of mingling but found that restocking/readjusting his equipment was the first priority

the lieutenant’s casual response leaves the squad speechless,, most expecting him to reprimand soap from the insinuation and their astonished gazes are fixed on him

ghost, however, continues to nonchalantly estimate the amount of ammunition left in his weapons

that is– until a subdued giggle fills the empty air

and he’s aware of that specific sound, doesn’t need to glance up to affirm his belief because it always tugs at his heart in an unfamiliar way

yet, his dark gaze still deviates to find yours

“my apologies. it was just really quiet.”

your voice is meek in comparison to earlier now that ghost’s scrutiny is trained on you and the detail leads to him raising a light-toned brow

the top of his balaclava crinkles due to the action,, a small humane feature that you desperately cling onto

soap also dropped his hand in response to your small outburst and satisfaction creeps up at ghost

he nods once, ease swelling within him at the sight of your untouched shoulder, before returning to concentrate on the equipment in front of him

“yer aff yer heid, bonnie,” soap whispers to you once light chatter erupts again, “I’d sure fix his problem.”

“what’s his problem?”

“the mask,” the scottish male huffs like it was obvious, “it’s always on–”

“I quite like it.”

you quickly interrupt soap’s rambling and he groans upon seeing your infatuated smile and usual faraway glint in your eyes that you adorn whenever you stare at ghost

much like you were committing now

“it’s the mystery,” soap wildly runs his fingers through his mohawk while attempting to explain your interest in the lieutenant, “that’s why the bonnies like him.”

“well,” ghost’s listless eyes reach yours and you finish your confession in a wishful exhale, “I don’t blame them.”

and ghost recognizes the look you’re casting him

that bashful yet alluring glimmer in your stare that has him placing down whatever equipment he was holding so he could rightfully return your gaze

and of course he hears your breathy disclosure,, revealing more than he’d bargained for

but he’s steadfast, not planning on tearing his gaze away, when you abruptly break eye contact with him

ghost blinks– once, twice, three times– upon losing your heated scrutiny an emptiness threatens to swallow him,, his body maneuvering to repose in your direction

legs stretched in front of him, he edges closer to where you stood while crossing his hulking arms

but you’re caught in conversing with someone and his finger taps idly on the table to patiently await the moment your gaze sweeps over to him again

it’s almost pathetic how he waits for your eyes to fix on him

however, when it does, he almost lets out a frazzled breath from beneath his mask

restocking his equipment could wait for another time because you grace him with one of those beguiling smiles that beckons him over– inviting the tempting risk and enticing danger that accompanies ghost wherever he goes

he catches you red-handed when you give him a slow once-over,, dragging your half-lidded eyes across the expanse of his massive physique but finishing your scan with an appreciative simper

and that’s when he finally moves

firmly pushing out the chair from beneath him, his robust legs carry him towards you in a resolute stride

a knowing grin dances on your lips due to his advancing,, the sight as clear as day when ghost shoulders past the members surrounding you

he doesn’t mumble any apologies

instead, he presses himself so close to you that he can distinguish your rapid heartbeat from beneath your fitted shirt and the cadence causes his head to tilt

his ebony eyes narrow upon seeing the growing blush, a shade of rouge, overtake your cheeks and the innocent reaction would’ve fooled him if he didn’t know what you secretly were

a vixen

he dips his head lower and the next words he utters drips from his tongue like smooth ambrosia

“see somethin’ you like, doll?”

your voice

ghost had a love/hate relationship with missions

on one hand, he was going in blind about the amount of recruits he’d lose

It was a constant risk of precious lives, one’s that had family/friends/people waiting for them back at home, with every mission

yet, leading the squad through missions kept his mind still,, rendering him too busy focusing on basic survival than fighting the incessant thoughts within his mind that strangled him during his free time

the loneliness, mental exhaustion, and emptiness eating at him until he could no longer stand it

but there was also you

“bravo 0-7, how copy?”

filtering through the radio’s static, your voice is carried through as a gentle melody in ghost’s tactical headset

the question cuts through the debris that he crushes beneath his heavy boots

he recognizes a heavy exhale from one of the recruits following behind him and he raises a hand to silence them

hearing your voice directions is crucial

but secretly, he’s glad that the higher ups invested in the latest technology so he could hear your voice clearly

especially the soothing inflection of his alias

“this is bravo 0-7,” he replies, never one to delay his responses to you

“lieutenant.”

and he’s familiar with that pleased tone that’s shared in the troop’s comms

the teasing purr of his rank visibly causes some of the newer recruits to freeze in their movements,, mind straying to less than innocent scenarios from the way you uttered it

before he can control himself, he casts an annoyed glare at them that (of course) goes unnoticed by you

his haunting eyes narrow considerably to wordlessly serve as a threat for their childish behavior

“(y/n),” he directs his attention to the seedy enclosure before him, “give me a reading.”

there’s a minute of silence, which ghost anxiously listens for any background noise that indicates if you’re in danger, before your voice crackles, “enemy ground cluster spotted. wiped them out asap.”

“atta girl.”

unbeknownst to him, your finger hovers above the communication button so the shaky exhale you let out from his praise isn’t heard

and he’s aware you had to excuse yourself due to his subtle approval

“target destruction confirmed,” captain price’s authoritative voice reminds ghost to refocus on the task at hand, “heading to the next destination.”

the squad synchronizes their movements to head south, in accordance to the enemies’ location

“where are your sights at, (y/n),” ghost implores while readjusting the mic so it sits snugly over his mask

unfortunately, his finger unknowingly bumps against his equipment and puts the two of you in a private channel

which you decide to take full advantage of

he casts a cautious glance in all directions before gesturing to the recruits to fall in behind him

it’s silent besides the branches that ghost prods away while he trudges through a clearing

steadying the throwing knife in his hand, he recognizes the cool metal while the weight of the weapon is slight in his grasp

as light as a feather

he’s more than accustomed to the ridges, grooves, and feel of the knife,, using it in necessary combat situations

but his dependable grip, the one that’s effortlessly shoved the weapon into countless enemies, falters when you answer his inquiry in a breathy voice

“my sights are locked on you, lieutenant.”

and it’s a line that could be taken two ways: you were watching ghost’s six or you were solely engaged on him for personal reasons

the fact was– your gaze was trained on him

it causes satisfaction,, scorching hot which spreads through him and keeps him warm in the chilly weather

and your utterance is as sweet as sugar that ghost is certain that you spout liquid honey when you part your lips

he reasons that’s probably why your lips are always so glossy whenever he sees you

ghost shifts, eyes trailing to the distant watch tower that you’re situated at, and slowly shakes his head

you were up to no good

“you’re trouble,” he reprimands but there’s no bite in his tone, “be good, will ya?”

“and if I’m not?”

there it is again, the sultry tone that drips from your voice to infer that there’s a double meaning

he halts to a stop, dragging a gloved hand over his face in an attempt to regain his self-control, and fights back a strangled groan

“come here then, pup,” his voice is so low-pitched that it serves as an inviting taunt, “say it to my face.”

and his self-restraint is thinning, becoming nonexistent because of the dangerous game you were playing

the desire to remind you of the high risk that accompanies cheeky comments floods within him

turning away from the other recruits to maintain some privacy, he’s initially pleased when he doesn’t hear your immediate retort

it seemed like you were finally learning that fueling fire wasn’t always the safest decision

but goodness did it create an indulgent buzz

and he curses under his breath when your brazen response crackles through the comms

“you serve our country,” your lips curl at the ends as you breathe out, “I just want to serve you.”

when you laugh at his jokes

honestly ghost wouldn’t coin himself as being a “jokester”

prefers if the other members told jokes to keep the mood lighthearted,, which he knows is essential to keeping up morale during missions

but if the time comes then his quick thinking is perfect for him to conjure up a joke or two

granted, it wouldn’t be the best jokes

ghost’s humor could be described as— interesting

very interesting

and a consensus that the other squad members agree with is that his jokes lean more towards dark humor >.>

like don’t get them wrong! dark humor could be used to transcend heavier emotions and share stronger emotions,, which is especially the case for ghost but they prefer to keep the jests easygoing (for the most part)

and ghost doesn’t really mind when his humor is overlooked in most situations since he understands it’s an acquired preference

but boy do you live to test him

“please? can’t you tell me at least one?”

you were at it again,, forcing your hands together while you conjured up all your effort to make your bottom lip quiver in a dramatic pout

leave it to you to corner ghost in the hallway right when he exited the maintenance room

caught him by surprise too! had to abruptly halt to stop the front of his tactical vest from bumping into you since he almost didn’t spot you because you were tucked so close to the doorway

he had raised a single, sharp brow to wordlessly ask if you needed anything from him,, mostly expecting that you’d usher him somewhere else to gather next mission’s intel

but ghost didn’t predict that you’d practically raced across the base just to ask him to tell you a joke

“just haven’t heard you tell one to the task force,” you casually explained which only added to his confusion

and he doesn’t know what aided in your curiosity to hear one of his jokes since you never disclosed how it had been a topic discussed among the group,, about how hearing a joke from ghost was a rarity

a part of you wished to prove them wrong

so you drew your lower lip between your teeth and dragged your eyes up until they were leveled with his

“please? for me?”

he can hear the lighter pitch of your voice when you’re pleading like this but he remains unmoving,, only crossing his arms to watch the act you put on

the corners of your mouth fall almost unceremoniously upon noticing ghost’s impassive front,, the goal of hearing one of his jokes slowly floating further and further away from your grasp

when you press yourself close enough for him to get a whiff of your sweet perfume, however, he rasps, “don’t do that.”

“what?”

“you think every time you say, ‘please? for me?’ I’ll do whatever you want,” ghost chides while slowly shaking his head, “well, not this time.”

because he knows better than to give in to your every whim– no matter how insignificant it was

it would build a bad habit if he always agreed to taking on your work or tasks,, which would evolve into small demands that he’d be burdened to complete along with his personal work

at least, he thinks he knows better

but then you nibble on your bottom lip and softly ask again, “please? for me?”

and he finds himself huffing out a heavy breath, dragging his gloved hand across his face, and uttering, “fine.”

so he stiffly stands there, lost in thought, until a couple awkward moments of silence pass

by this time you weren’t expecting much, assuming that ghost would rely on a cliche joke to tell you since you hadn’t given him much time to prepare in advance

but his throaty voice knocks you out of your stupor, “what do you call someone who just got run over by a tank?”

and there you go– you had all that you desired since ghost managed to tell you a joke

he observes how you tilt your head,, mind racing in response to his joke before you ultimately give up with a small shrug

his eyes follow the gentle curve of shoulders before meeting your gaze again

ghost figures that he’d answer for you

“crunchy.”

a beat of silence,, ghost glances away

there’s no way he would’ve envisioned the feedback you’d give him in return to his (rather) dark humor but hearing your overjoyed giggles made him think he’d hit the ultimate jackpot

“that’s a good one,” you manage to compliment between your fit of laughter, “I liked it.”

your hand outstretched to gently shove at ghost’s arm,, aware of the solid mass that served as the top of his bicep and you immediately withdraw your hand at the realization

peering back at you, he recognizes the mirth that swirls in your eyes and notes the pride that swells within him

because you’re laughing at his joke

the intensity grips at him,, threatening to never let him go so long as you’re next to him

it’s addicting

he quietly continues staring at you as your mouth curves into a delighted smile

and he tries to memorize the action,, comparing your smile to the brilliant half-moons that he’d spot in the dark skies during nightly missions,, and the sight is almost too beautiful to avert his gaze from

similar to how a person that enjoys art ogles at intricate and exquisite paintings

before he rethinks his decision, he decides to speak up

“don’t smile at me like that.”

and although it sounds like a reprimand, the words leave his lips almost tenderly as he gazes at you

saying “please”

you weren’t typically one to complain about a long, drawn-out day because learning how to cope with them was part of your job

but today just wasn’t your day :(

from hauling extra equipment across the base, getting a light scolding from the higher-ups, and waiting for directions while in the frigid air– it was exhausting

not to mention that the oncoming headache, as well as chills, indicated that sickness was upon you

and as the back of your head hit the couch’s plush pillow,, your relieved exhale was a huge indicator that relaxing was the dream for you

yet, having time to rest was too good to be true

as price ushered the rest of 141 to gather around, there was a debate to enforce lookout duty for the night

just the usual scouting for any navigation marks, ships, or hazards,, which was more difficult to spot in the dark

there were clear directions given to the members on who would be put on lookout duty

and what do you know, it was your turn to lead

so you’re absolutely dreading your shift, desperately attempting to shrug the burden off to someone else

“soap,” you hesitantly call out before the task force members could waltz to their own rooms, “do me a solid and trade shifts with me, will you?”

there’s a flicker of consideration in soap’s cerulean-colored eyes when he notices your lack of energy and enthusiasm towards lookout duty but he’s unwilling to give up his few hours of rest as well

“am pure done in. I can’t stay awake,” soap explains with a grimace, “sorry ‘bout that, bonnie.”

forcing the frown on your face to turn into a stiff smile, you allow him to brush past you while you reassure him, “I understand.”

then you were onto your next victim comrade

“how about you, gaz,” you shift closer to the sergeant just before he leaves, “mind taking lookout duty from me?”

he pivots using the heel of his foot, not quite expecting that you’d ask because you were usually the first to volunteer for the shift, and raises his brows

gaz tips his cap in your direction to serve as an apologetic gesture, “afraid I can’t, (y/n).”

and just like that, the entirety of the squad leaves you standing in the main room

defeated

your eyes catch the burnt-orange hue casted along the horizon, signaling that dusk was upon you and your stalling would be inevitable

with a huff, you’re about to leave the room to situate yourself at the observatory deck when you catch sight of a lingering figure

“lieutenant?”

upon hearing his rank, ghost glances up from his task of dusting off his handgun and crumples the dirty rag in his hand

he’s leaning against the edge of the table, feet spread apart to stabilize himself

his dead-set eyes wordlessly prods you to continue talking and you force down the lump in your throat, “sorry. I was just surprised to see you still here, that’s all.”

he’s clearly exhausted

the usual tenseness in his shoulders has slowly diminished to where he appears withdrawn

yet he thumbs at the weapon’s magazine and your eyes watch as the design on his gloves seem to dance at the action

ghost nods once,, not one for small talk and you internally groaned at that late realization

silence ensues

when an idea pops into your mind– why not ask ghost to take your watch duty?

he’d understand, right?

inklings of doubt begin to gnaw at you but you were utterly desperate for rest tonight and your headache was worsening by the second

“sir,” you meekly initiate before you have the chance to back down, “would you be willing to take my lookout duty shift?”

your voice wavers, it’s blatantly obvious, and the anxiousness urges you to ramble on, “sorry! I don’t usually ask others to switch with me. it’s just been a really long day and I think I could benefit with some sleep. which, now that I’m thinking about it, anyone would benefit from sleep since everyone’s exhausted from the mission but what I’m trying to say is–”

ghost raises a gloved hand

it’s a silent command to get you to halt and he rises to his feet

you note the way his eyes deliberately scan the room before taking a step in your direction

his tactical gear rattles,, the clasps slightly swinging due to the movement but he crosses the space between the two of you with ease

the close proximity is perfect to get a glimpse of his opaque eyes which are obscured from smudged eye paint

tucking his index finger underneath your chin, he lifts your face so you’re forced to maintain his stare, and his pale lashes flutter when he narrows his eyes

“use your words.”

the command is throaty, gruff, and deliciously low

it takes you a second to regain your composure, inwardly stunned at how enticing his voice sounded, and decide to take a moment to gather your thoughts

his touch is warm

and ghost’s gaze was specifically fixed on you

however, his hard stare flickers when your teeth gently tug at your bottom lip while you ponder the most effective way to get your point across

you would need to use your final resort to sway ghost into covering your shift!

“I’m just not feeling the best right now and would really appreciate it if you took lookout duty instead.” you explained in sincerity

it’s a good tactic– great even, but it wasn’t the final trick up your sleeve

but it didn’t matter what you were explaining to ghost (whether you were giving him a half-assed excuse or ultimately feeling unwell) because he wasn’t listening,, too focused on the glimmer that shined within your wide eyes

and the sparkle became more apparent under the dim light

ghost’s grasp tilted your chin upwards,, he’s silent and awaiting your next ploy

he, however, wasn’t expecting the next word to tumble from your lips in a soft, pleading whisper

“please.”

his restraint runs alarmingly thin,, his finger that’s tucked underneath your chin twitches and the desire to encourage you to say it again is evident

“what was that?”

the question is uttered so dangerously low that you gulp before softly repeating, “please, lieutenant.”

and goodness did you look alluring while voicing it

he’s at a standstill

not to mention that he delights in the unwarranted swipe of your tongue over your plush lips,, wetting them just enough to shine

and as he’s staring down at you, you’re peering up at him but he’s so unbelievably tall that you crowd yourself closer

bloody hell

the warmth radiating off your body reminds him of your proximity and before he can fall victim to your coquetry he reels back

who was he to tell you no?

“fine.”

it’s a simple response uttered by ghost that immensely pleases you and you can’t help but wonder how permissive he was about it

“really?” you question, brows shooting up in surprise because it was rare for the lieutenant to willingly volunteer to cover someone else’s lookout duty

he drops the hand holding your chin and nods once

busying himself by rechecking his handgun for full ammunition, he chastises how easily he made his decision

can’t blame him though

ghost would’ve been a goner if you continued pleading to him using your expressive eyes,, the ones that cause his fingers to inch closer to hold you

the most dangerous weapon he’s faced (in all honesty)

and he’d rather NOT be rendered speechless in front of you

he tucks the gun into the proper spot on his holster and turns to leave in accordance to his end of the compromise

but not before he coolly mentions, “you should do that more.”

you’re confused but ultimately satisfied to have finally issued your shift to someone else

head tilting due to ghost’s comment, you decide to clarify what he meant

“do what more, lieutenant?”

“beg.”

#simon ghost riley #ghost x reader #simon riley x reader #ghost #simon riley #call of duty x reader #call of duty modern warefare 2 #call of duty #simon ghost riley imagine #cod x reader #ghost cod #simon ghost riley headcanons

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fcthots · 4 months

Note

i need to be cornered and told i’m a pathetic little crybaby who needs to be fucked until i’m nice and quiet and dumb

like…exams are too much. jason should shut my brain off and fuck me against a wall pls and thanks

-🍓

Jason was concerned. You've been staring at the same page of notes for 25 minutes. There was no possible way you were retaining the information. Your eyes appear shiny with unshed tears as you've been at it for hours. You refused to take a break because you were too stressed and he was worried about you, but he knew how important this was to you. He tried to help where he could, but this is where he draws the line. He will not ignore you and let you keep torturing yourself like this. He will not ignore your tears, but he knows you won't enjoy any break you take because you'll be stressed about not studying the entire time.

So he'll make sure you can't think.

"Okay. We're taking a break."

He watches your eyebrows predictably draw up together, puzzled. "What?"

"Mandatory break." You try to object, but the moment you open your mouth, he interrupts you. "Nuh uh. We're gonna let that pretty brain of yours have a break, ok?"

He smirks as you freeze, blood rushing to your cheeks.

"We don't have to do what you're thinking, but you are going to take a break regardless."

He finally looks into your eyes. Your pupils are blown wide and your eyes still contain the unshed tears from a moment ago's studying. You don't respond.

"D'you want me to turn your brain off pretty baby?" He chuckles when you nod enthusiastically, not a moment's hesitation. He pushes his weight up from the far side of the couch where he was sat and approaches you. His rough fingers gently hold onto your jaw in stark contrast to the words coming out of his mouth.

"Does my pathetic little crybaby need to be fucked until she's nice and quiet and dumb?" The pads of his thumbs trace your jawline and you're sure he can feel the heat under your skin. He laughs when you nod. "I think she does."

He removes his hand from your chin and uses both hands to move your legs together. He drags them up and sideways onto the couch, twisting you so your back rests against the arm. His hands move your thighs apart so that a moment later he can situate himself in between them. He uses his weight to his advantage in order to pin you to the sofa. One arm is used for support to hold some of his weight; the other worms its way into your hair. It tugs at the strands until your tilt your head up, exposing your neck, much to Jason's pleasure.

He adopts a rhythm. He grinds against you, works a hickey into your neck, and then teases you. It's intoxicating. "Gonna have to flip you over at some point, baby. Maybe I'll keep you worked up until you can't hold yourself up. Would you like that? Being all needy for me? Don't worry, sweetheart. I'll do all the work for you. Your pretty little brain won't have to do a thing. Probably for the best because the only thing you'll be able to think of is my name and how good you feel with me inside you. I'll take care of you. See if we can bring those tears back, yeah?"

God, you loved his mouth. That stupid fucking mouth.

#this is what i was thinking about while studying #dirty talk >>> the actual sex #i hope your exams go better than you'd hoped anon 🫶#saph’s love letters #jason todd #jason todd x reader #saph’s thots #red hood #red hood x reader #jason todd imagine #jason todd x you #red hood imagine #red hood x you #jason todd smut #jason todd x reader smut #red hood smut #red hood x reader smut #smut #🍓 anon

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syndxlla · 11 months

Text

best friends don’t look at each other the way we do

A low stakes, high reward, and self-indulgent Zelink fan fiction. Canon-compliant. Takes place between BOTW and TOTK.

Heavily inspired by my Zelink thoughts

I wanted to dig into the dirty, grimly reality of being the saviors of the world and not knowing how to be the savior of yourself. But you can find that safety in another person.

Fan fiction warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual smut (in later chapters, characters are consenting adults), references to self-harm, eating-disorders, and a lot of angst. Each chapter will have chapter-specific warnings.

Chapter one: I used to tie your shoes

Song: We’ll never have sex by Leith Ross

Summary: Fresh off Hyrule Field, Link and Zelda have to face life after the Calamity, and come to terms with the long road to physical, emotional, and mental recovery.

Warnings: Vomiting, trauma, canon-typical violence, eating-sensitivity

Word count: 3.7k words

Author’s Note: I am so excited to share this. Please share and support this in anyway. I drew this art for the cover :) chapter begins after the page break. I love you guys. Also, these chapters won’t be heavily edited. Ignore any grammatical/spelling errors pls

Time. We never seem to have enough time. Green grass burns soft red embers into the field, a horse’s mane is rebraided at the nearest stable, and the stars shine as if nothing changed. Because it hadn’t, not really. The sun will still rise in the east and set in the west. The birds will still sing their songs at daybreak and the fireflies will still flicker at dusk. Nothing changed, but everything did. The air feels lighter, the sun feels warmer and yet Zelda’s fingers still shake as if she was in the snowy Hebra peaks.

The Princess by nature, is very gentle. She’s soft and patient at heart, but was placed under such strenuous situations all through her youth that caused her to often snap or lash out. But not now. Currently she is silent, stone-cold and confused. She was in shock. And Link could tell.

“Here.” He pulls out a baked apple from his pack, handing it to her. He has to get her attention twice before she finally takes it, their hands brushing for a moment. Her awareness returns to her gaze then, her bright-green eyes meeting his.

“I-I’m so sorry.” She sighs, her voice weak. “I’m just… so tired.” Link tries not to show his distress, but she notices his demeanor change as well. “How much further?” She says, rubbing her eyes sleepily.

“Probably another hour and a half. It’s just through those mountains.” He points.

“Dueling peaks. I remember.” She nods. “I remember everything.”

“Everything?” He asks as he starts to dig around a pack on the rear end of Epona, searching for his rito attire. It was starting to get dark, and she hadn’t stopped shaking since they left Castle Town almost three hours ago.

Zelda nods once.

Her silence speaks volumes.

He yanks out his snowquill armor, finally. “Do you remember anything from the last hundred years?” She doesn’t answer right away, she instead takes a smaller than small bite out of the apple. “Zel? Can I put this on you? You’re still shivering.” He asks, looking at her blank, traumatized stare. “It’s from the Rito, it’s soft as a cloud and will keep you warm for the rest of the way.”

“The Rito.” She sighs. “Revali…”

Link realizes that she hasn’t had any time to process what she just went through. She had spent the last one hundred years deeply focused, probably in a trance-like state. He places a hand on her cheek. “Look at me.” His voice is gentle and welcoming, not forcing her at all. She looks at him, their eyes locking. “Breathe with me.”

They take two deep, heavy breaths. They sync their inhales, exhaling together.

“It’s over. It’s all over, okay?” He reassures her. “It’s not coming back. It’s just us now, alright?”

She swallows, still emotionless. “You’ve changed.” She says.

“So have you.” Link smiles in an attempt to comfort her. “Can I put this shirt on you?” He asks again. She answers faster than she usually had, nodding twice this time. Link bunches up the excess fabric before pulling the head-opening over her hair. He then guides each one of her hands through the arm-holes. Link takes a moment to adjust the garb around her torso until it was probably positioned around her shaking body. She immediately sighs in relief.

“You talk more.” She mumbles, looking at him as he gently wraps his fingers around her long, golden hair and softly pulls it out of the shirt, knowing how much it irritates him when his hair is loose underneath a shirt.

He smiles again, “I do. Some people say I don’t shut up.” He tries to lighten the mood.

“Like who?”

“Impa.” He sighs.

Zelda’s eyes light up with that name. “Impa?”

He hums and nods. “We can go visit her when you’re feeling stronger, okay?”

“Okay…” Zelda looked down into her lap, the skirt of her goddess dress was barely white anymore. “I am going to get stronger, right?” She asks, her voice tender and broken.

Link’s heart sinks. Not because he’s worried she won’t, but rather because he feels responsible for putting her in this state.

“Of course.” He reassures. He believed it. He wanted to believe it.

“I’m… just so tired.” She repeats herself.

“I know, come on, let's get you a bed.” He then picks her up bridal style from the ground. They had stopped in the first place to get that rito armor for her. She rests her head against his chest as he lifts her onto Epona. She smells like burnt oil and exhaustion. He probably isn’t smelling any better.

They wouldn’t get to Hateno until noon at the earliest tomorrow, and traveling wasn’t doing anything for her recovery. He gets on Epona behind her, letting her weak body rest against his chest as they make their way to Dueling Peaks Stable. The road is quiet, so much quieter than it ever has been. The pair of lizalfos always swimming in the river aren’t there, and even the crickets suppress their chirps.

It’s post-apocalyptic. Literally. Link isn’t sure how to feel.

She throws up a few hundred feet from the stable. She gags and lurches over the side of the horse, somehow managing to keep it off of anyone. Not much comes out, she hasn’t eaten in over a century, but Link frowns when he realizes the apple probably triggered it. He silently curses himself out for causing her any form of distress. She dry heaves violently, and Link tries to hold her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. When she finishes, she holds her breath.

She can’t decide if she feels like she lost a bit of dignity or not. She holds back the tears that well in her eyes. Link breathes in to say something, but she raises her hand in protest. She would rather they act like it never happened. Neither of them say anything from there on, they just keep riding the final minute of the journey.

Everyone at the stable was asleep except for an attendant… who was also treading precariously between consciousness and a deep rest behind the counter.

“Excuse me?” Link asks to wake him up, hopping off of Epona after making sure Zelda would still be comfortable in his absence. She would never admit she wasn’t.

The man stirs awake with a jolt. He yawns, slightly startled, “So sorry, young man.” Link wouldn’t necessarily call himself young. He smirks softly.

“I’d like to board this horse till the morning, and we’d like one soft bed, please.” Link nods before setting down the required rupees. The man squints his eyes, taking the money in hand.

“Ah! It’s you! Link, was it?” He asks when Link turns his back to help Zelda down from the horse. “Jeez, you haven’t passed through here in at least six months! We were holding onto that old mare for you!” He gestures to their stables where a small gray spotted horse sleeps. Link’s first horse since he woke up from his century-long slumber. He only rode her in the beginning, when he was doing chores between Hateno, Kakariko and one time a longer trip to Zora’s Domain. But she’s old and weak, which is why she was easy to catch when Link was still regaining his strength. He stopped taking her out when he found Epona in the western part of Central Hyrule.

“Yeah… you guys can let her free.” He says as he sets Zelda down on the ground. She holds her cold hands together.

“Well uhh.. we tried. You see, after four months at a stable we let go of any forgotten pony’s, but she kept coming back.” He chuckled, his voice exhibiting a distinctive nasality.

“Here,” Link hands him a red rupee, not wanting to discuss an old horse any longer when he literally has the closest thing to a God in this world resting her head on his back. “Keep her for another month, I’ll come take care of her then. Okay?” Link asks. “Can I get that bed now?” Not impolite or forceful, he never was. He’s assertive but has a comforting cadence to his tone. For being such a talented swordsman, guard and easily the most deadly hylian in the entire kingdom, he was never rude or condescending. He was welcoming, and little kids often looked up at him with intimidation when they first met him, but it didn’t ever take long until they were chasing him with tree-branches while he fled and begged for mercy, letting them take him down with ease. The kids at the stables loved him, knew him by name, and would play as him in their silly pretend games.

The stable-man replies, “Of course! But you only asked for one bed, it’s not big enough to fit both of you.”

“I know, it’s for her not me.” Link then starts to guide her into the stable, where it’s much warmer and safer. Just because it’s quiet doesn’t mean it's safe. Hyrule is a dangerous place by nature, especially if you’re two century-old Gods being hunted for sport with the faces of children.

“You won’t sleep?” Zelda asks quietly behind him.

He doesn’t directly answer, and instead guides her to the bed. She’s weary, and he’s terrified of her not waking up. He wouldn’t be able to sleep even if he wanted to. He helps the Princess sit in the bed, and kneels before her to untie her sandals. When he touches the leather, he immediately gets transported into another memory.

It rips through him, just like the memories he had images of. Suddenly, he’s kneeling in the same position, but instead he was outside of the spring of courage. He looks up to see the clear sky, it’s sunset, and then his eyes meet Zeldas. Her face is rosy, and her eyes don’t have the blank stare they possess in the current time. He looks down at his fingers, tying the straps around her ankle.

“Really, you don’t have to do that.” She hums. He doesn’t respond. He never did back then. He finishes wrapping the leather around itself and then stands up. His face is emotionless. She looks at him, they’re about the same height. “I won’t be long this time.” She says. “I’m not expecting much anyways.” She sighs and then walks past him, but before she can get very far, he gently grabs onto her arm, holding her back. He doesn’t say anything but she can read his expression. He’s trying to tell her to have faith this time, just one more time.

Surely the Goddess would commune with her.

She shakes her head, and wades into the warm waters of the spring. Link turns to watch her, how her hair cascaded down her back, how her hands balled into fists. She turns around to look at him, their eyes meet. She smiles.

He comes back as fast as the scene played in his memory. He blinks a few times, and looks up at her. She doesn’t look any different, very little—if any—time seemed to pass. He doesn’t usually experience memories with someone, he wonders if she realized anything happened. Link didn’t even consider the fact he would keep receiving memories after the fact. His stomach turns, he feels like he’s lived two completely different lives and is forced to remember things from one that he doesn’t even relate to anymore. He doesn’t feel like the same person, the boy he was a hundred years ago is a complete stranger to him.

Link much preferred this life.

And that scares Zelda.

“I just remembered something.” He says. Zelda hums in response, a light-hearted noise that implies an inquiry. He elaborates, “I used to tie your sandals for you at the springs, didn’t I?” He asks.

Zelda smiles for the first time since they defeated Ganon. It’s a small pull of her lips, not showing any teeth but her eyes finally light back up. After she had asked if he remembered her on the field, she collapsed, not even aware of her own exhaustion until that moment. He ran to her aid, and ever since then she felt woozy, it only got worse the further from the castle they got.

“You did, yes.” She says. “I never asked you to, but since I was in the dress, you insisted.” She sighs. Link grunts in response. “It was very chivalrous.” Zelda adds.

They look at each other for a minute. Not saying anything. It was late, and two beds down there was a set of kid brothers sleeping. Link remembered them from their last visit. One of them wanted nothing to do with him, trying to act mature and ‘cool’. Link eventually won him over, though. They don’t speak out of fear of waking anyone. Zelda’s smile slowly fades away, and Link swallows thickly. They will never be the same.

He pulls her sandals off, her feet are filthy with century-old mud. He silently smiles about that. The closest thing to a Goddess in the entire world has dirty feet. How human of her.

Then, after pulling down the heavy rito-down blanket so she can slide in, he helps Zelda swing her legs into the bed. He pulls the blanket up to her neck, she lays on her side facing him. Her hands find their way up to her face, resting her cheek against them. Link pulls a short stool over to the bed, sitting on it and looking at her, bending at the waist.

“You’re not going to leave me, are you?” She asks in a timid, sleepy voice.

Link’s heart just about breaks when she asks. “Never.” He shakes his head. He takes his gloved hand and tucks a piece of her loose hair behind her pointed-ears. He lets his fingers linger a little bit longer than they should. “I will never ever leave you again.”

“Promise?” She asks, her eyes heavy with exhaustion.

“Promise.” He whispers, “Just as long as you promise to never leave me, okay?” He asks, ignoring the lump in this throat.

“Promise.” She says, taking her pinky finger and sticking it out for him. He wraps his finger with hers, which is far daintier and softer than he's ever been. She is a Princess, after all.

“Wake up in the morning, okay?” He whispers.

“Mhm.” She hums as her eyes slowly close. He tries to disconnect their pinky fingers, but she holds onto his. He leaves his hand in that position, letting her hold it until she falls fast asleep.

Link doesn’t move his hand until he’s certain it won’t wake her up from her much needed rest. He looks at her gentle, soft face. No one even understands what she just went through, no one ever will. He’s worried sick that she won’t make it through the night, and he keeps leaning his head down to listen to her breathing, or places a few fingers against her forehead to check her temperature.

He does his best to stay vigilant the entire night, not once even looking away from her. But just before the sun rises, his body suddenly catches up with his mind. He also just had the most demanding battle of his life. His muscles started to ache, and he developed a headache. He was just a boy, after all. More than anything, his sword arm was weak, and fire-hot pain shot up and down through it. He probably overused it fightin the calamity.

He keeps telling himself that he’s fine. He has to be fine, for Zelda. His arm isn’t that bad, what really hurts was his heart. Usually he’d just down a fairy tonic and maybe go to the hot springs if he was in the area but this pain was different. A twisting and contracting ache in his chest pulled and tugged on his lungs and pulse. It’s the same pain he felt when he remembered Mipha, and more specifically, the pain he felt when he dreamed about his family before the resurrection.

The dream that gave him the memories of a little sister with blonde hair like his collecting fireflies in her pockets. Her laugh echoing, the call of an older man, the image of a royal guards sword leaned up against the dinner table. The touch of his father’s hand as he rubs Link’s back to sleep.

Link’s first sword.

He wakes up like a fire, standing up and almost toppling over. He didn’t even realize he had fallen asleep. He could hear the soft tune of the penny whistle playing the standard stable theme, and the two little brothers played tag outside. He curses and looks down at Zelda.

Her bed is empty, and his heart completely stops. He starts breathing hard and heavy, his entire nervous system feels as though it’s pulled into stasis. How could he make such a foolish mistake? He swings his sword over his back, strapping his shield to his leathers and turns around in a wild-hunt to see the Princess sitting at the round stable table, drinking out of a mug and speaking gently with an older man.

Link takes a breath of relief, and approaches the two.

“Good Morning.” She smiles up at him. Her voice sounded much better, and her eyes finally had life back into them, but she still wasn’t herself. Her skin still looked sickly, her face hollowed out and eyes droopy. Any progress is good progress, Link decides then and there.

“I… didn’t mean to fall asleep.” Link sighs. “I’m so sorry. When did you wake up?”

“Oh not long ago, maybe twenty minutes? I didn’t want to disturb you-”

“You should have.” He interrupts her and her words get swallowed out of surprise. Link realizes that he snapped at her a little, and immediately becomes apologetic. “I’m sorry, again. I just…”

“You’re worried about me. I understand.” She takes his hand, her bones frail. In many ways, she physically looked worse today than last night. But at least she could hold a conversation. He nods. Zelda notices the tension, and changes the subject, “This kind gentleman was telling me about when you saved the stable from a horde of lizalfos about a year ago.”

Link looks over at the man, Giahzo. “Oh that was nothing, it was just two green lizalfos and a blue one who wandered too close to the stable.” Link hums. Their hands were still held together by Zelda.

“Don’t be so modest!” The old man chuckled, “Without you, it would have been a disaster! The number of monsters means nothing, especially when you don’t know how to fight!”

“That’s very kind of you.” Link smiles and then realizes he and Zeldas hands, he’s the one to pull it away. “What are you drinking?”

“I’m not sure…” Zelda begins and Link immediately snatches the mug from her hand. “Hey!”

“You can’t just drink something mysterious.” Link scolds.

“Oh it’s just a bit of Hateno Milk.” The man assures. Link looks at him, then Zelda, and then into the mug to see the creamy liquid. He brings it to his nose and smells it, and then takes a sip of it. Sure enough, it was just milk.

“I’m sorry, Giahzo.” He apologizes and places the mug back down. “I’m just on high alert.”

“Do not apologize to me, apologize to this lovely young lady you’ve graced us with.” The elderly man smiles with a chuckle, his eyes wrinkling up with his age. Zelda smiles, blushing a little, “Tell me, dear, where are you from? We don’t get many new faces at this stable these days.”

Zelda looks at him, her eyes sad. A hundred years ago every person in Hyrule knew her face. She looks at Link, unsure how to answer.

“She’s from the Outskirts stable.” Link covers for her. “Her family used to reside in Central Hyrule before the Calamity.”

“Yes.” Zelda immediately chirps, “We’re headed to Hateno for…”

“A honeymoon!?” Giahzo smiles brightly. Both Link and Zelda freeze in their tracks, and Link hopes he doesn’t look as embarrassed as he feels. “Hateno is a great Honeymoon destination! Although I’ve heard Lureline is even more splendid!” He clasps his hands together.

“Research.” Zelda clarifies, “so sorry to disappoint.” She chuckles politely, making a conscious effort not to look at Link. “I’m researching… population dynamics in Hyrule.” She makes something up that sounds completely believable.

“Of course.” Link then says, “I’m just escorting her there, we are total strangers.”

That breaks Zelda’s heart.

She knows he’s just trying to be extra careful, pushing her anonymity as much as possible. And in a way, it wasn’t a total lie. But it cut her like a knife.

“I see…” Giahzo doesn’t seem convinced. “Well, if you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to stop by. Hopefully the monsters will start to die down.” He smiles and stands up, moving outside.

Zelda is still afraid to look at Link, and he’s a little bit shaken up by the entire interaction. He knows the Yiga are still out there, he knows that there are people who will try to take advantage of her for power or money. He has no reason to suspect anything from the old man, but he can’t help himself from being deliberate. He senses her tension and walks back to the bed to gather their things.

“You should have woken me up.” Link says as he picks up a satchel full of food and readjusts his gloves.

“I’m sorry.” Her voice was timid and tired. He turns around to see her, her green eyes looking up at him apologetically. “I didn’t know it would worry you so.” He approaches her.

“Of course it worries me.” He sighs. “I spent three years trying to get you out of that castle, I’m not gonna lose you on the first night.” He holds his hand out for her to trade, helping her up. She must not have rested as well as he thought, because as soon as she gets on her feet, she almost topples right over him. He catches her, holding her up before she collapses. “Woah there.” He mutters. “You alright?”

She nods, “Let’s just get to that house you told me about.”

—

chapter two

749 notes · View notes

sorrowsofsilence · 6 months

Text

I Was Always Yours • 2

Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Words: 5.1k

Part One

Warnings: smut 18+ (mentions of PnV, wrap it b4 u tap it pls), fluff, female/male receiving, anxiety/panic attacks, swearing, alcohol, dirty talk

Summary: You grew up with Nick Ruffilo and Noah, but its been years since you’ve seen your best friends due to them being away touring. When Ruffilo came back to your hometown, opening his home tattoo studio, you get the opportunity to reconnect with him, and Noah. Deep down you’ve always had something for Noah, and it turns out he’s always felt something for you too. Perhaps seeing eachother years later, after you’ve both changed, sparked something.

Authors note: This is part 2! Initially I wasn’t planning on doing a second part but there was a lot of love on the first <3 so thank you! Hope you enjoy this one! (With 2 scenes of smut for all of us sick fucks to enjoy!)

PS. THIS IS A FANFIC ABOUT REAL PEOPLE IN FICTIONAL SCENARIOS. I AM NOT IMPLYING THIS IS HOW THESE PEOPLE ARE IRL OR THAT THIS SITUATION WOULD HAPPEN. IT IS FOR FANFIC PURPOSES ONLY!

Noah’s back rested against the bedroom wall, the red LEDs illuminating his room. The clock read 3am, way past our bedtime, yet here I was, succumbing myself to Noah’s need.

“I can’t stop thinking about a few days ago,” he had said as I sat in his bed, days after we reconnected. I was playing on my phone while he was messing around on his computer, working on music. We had hung out non-stop since seeing each other; catching up, sharing stories, reminiscing, and just spending time together like we used to with an added activity.

“Me either,” I had replied, sitting up as my heart began racing thinking about it. What were we now? Were we still just friends? Things were not the same, things were different, but It was a good difference, it was how things always should’ve been…but was it the right choice?

“Nicks asleep,” he had said, turning his chair to face me. It was silent for a moment, as we had stared at each other, trying to read the expression on one another’s face.

“I need you so bad Y/N, you have me completely whipped.” He had said, before standing up and walking over to me: he had started kissing me rigidly, taking me into his arms.

“You need to earn your way back to my lips,” Noah whispered as he groaned deeply, his long, inked fingers tangled within the strands of my hair, wrapped around in a desirable hold.

He held my head in place firmly as my mouth slid up and down, hand holding the rest, tongue swirling around the tip. My legs supported me from below as I kneeled before him at his mercy.

“Christ Y/N, you got cheated on when you can suck dick like this?” Noah looked down at me, eyes fluttering closed before tilting his head back in bliss. His hips rolled into my face gently, beginning to fuck my mouth as his other hand joined the first, gripping the other side of my head, “Man's fucking loss,” he scoffed in disbelief.

I rolled my eyes and internally laughed, choking on Noah before looking up through my lashes, watching as his mouth hung open slightly, eyebrows furrowed in pleasure. Watching the hold I had over him turned me on immensely. He was falling apart because of me.

I gagged on him for a moment longer, pushing myself as far as I could, before pulling off of him, the string of saliva following my lips.

“Fuck,” Noah gave me a breathy laugh, looking down in awe with a lopsided grin “You were gone from me for too long, you’re telling me we could have been doing this years ago?”

I gave him a small smile, “I think we have a lot of missed time to make up for.”

I wrapped my hand around him, stroking up and down, rotating my wrist, before attaching my mouth to him again. Noah’s hands gripped my hair tighter, keeping me in place once again as he fucked me.

“Such a pretty girl, letting me fuck your mouth like this,” Noah pulled me closer to his abdomen as he hit the back of my throat. I gagged but closed my eyes to keep going.

“Y/N, look at me,” Noah demanded and my eyes snapped upwards towards his own, and he watched me watch him. With his lips parted he observed my every move, heavy pants heaving from his chest, shallow grunts pouring from his soul.

“Shit,” Noah’s body began to twitch, and seconds later my mouth was filled, threads of his release coating the back of my throat.

Noah tucked my hair behind my ears, rubbing his fingers down underneath my chin, “Good girls swallow,” he said, “all of it.”

I moaned at his words and obeyed, watching his eyes glint with satisfaction and complete reverence as I sucked.

Drinking in all of him I pulled away, and Noah leaned down, pulling my chin towards him, planting a kiss on my lips. I melted into him, sighing with contentment as he pulled up his black shorts.

“I was always yours,” he said, “but you keep proving to me that I’m never going anywhere ever again.”

+=+=+=+=+=+=

“Folio, Jolly this is Y/N: Y/N, this is Folio and Jolly,” Noah introduced me officially to Nick and Joakim, the drummer and guitarist, and I immediately felt giddy. Although known Noah and Ruffilo for years, I had never met the other two current members in person; only through photographs.

I had to admit I was a little excited, because I really did enjoy their music, and therefore have always wanted to meet the other two.

“It’s cool to see you guys in person and not on a screen,” I laughed shyly, shaking their hands. Folio squinted with his eyes, his crooked tooth smile even more charming face to face. Jolly pulled me in for a shake and a hug, catching me off guard. I felt flush as his long hair tickled my face, patting his back.

“Nice to finally meet you! Noah hasn’t shut up about you.” Folio said, grinning.

Noah ran up from behind, wrapping his arms around me, and lifting me up. I squealed with my back against his chest, laughing as he swung me around, playfully, “yea, because I missed her,” Noah laughed, placing his face in the crook of my neck, still holding on to me from behind.

I held on to his arms that crossed my chest, blushing at his signs of affection in front of his friends.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this happy.” Jolly smiled warmly, “fucking goof.”

“So, you guys were friends growing up?” Folio asked as we all started walking towards the car. Noah had insisted I ride with the boys to the concert, coming early to spend time and see how everything behind the scenes worked. I told Noah I’d be happy to wait in line with the rest of the crowd, but he was taking this VIP very seriously.

“You want me to punish you if you don’t listen to me?”

Yes please, I had thought; but all I could do was stare up at him as he slowly backed me up towards the kitchen table.

“Noah,” I whined, tilting my head at him as he gripped my hips, his cologne filling my senses, “I’m going to watch the show from the crowd, but I’ll come with you everywhere else.”

My back hit the wood, and Noah leaned over me, placing a kiss on my forehead before kissing down to my lips.

“Good,” he mumbled, his hand sliding around my hip to behind, squeezing me, “but you better be behind the stage by the time I walk off at the end of Dethrone, or we’re gonna have a problem.”

“Yeah, Y/N, Noah and I went to school together,” Ruffilo said, offering me a hand to pull me into the car. I sat between him and Noah, Jolly and Folio sitting in the back row.

“Cool,” Folio said, before drumming on the back of the seat. I watched him, smiling.

“You’re pretty good at that hey?” I said, and he smiled back, shrugging.

“I’m hyped for today, I fucking love this place.”

We started driving towards the venue, and the closer we got to our destination, the more I noticed Noah’s anxiety beginning to spike. The entire time he kept his gaze out the window, hand gripping my thigh, resting his chin on his palm. His leg bounced rapidly, and ever so often I felt his fingers squeeze me, his hand beginning to vibrate.

I looked at him with concern, the smile from my conversation with Jolly fading from my lips as Noah took a brief sharp exhale, staying extremely still except for his leg. I placed my hand on top of his own, and Noah immediately stopped bouncing.

You okay? I mouthed, to which he shrugged, his dark brown eyes looking at me with apprehension before turning his gaze back out the window, the concrete jungle swaying past in a grey, lifeless blur. The boys became quiet, pretending to be preoccupied but watched; knowing that Noah was beginning to have a panic attack.

I flipped our hands, entwining my fingers with Noah’s and resting them on his moving leg, rubbing my thumb delicately across his skin. His hands were clammy but I held on in compassion, creating a soothing, rhythmic touch on the top of his hand. I rested my head on his shoulder, to which he placed his on top of mine.

Without saying anything I began to inhale through my nose, expiring throughout my mouth, and Noah eventually caught on, mimicking my breathing pattern. Opening up his palm, I ran the tips of my finger up and down each appendage, tracing the outline of his hand before circling his palm, moving from the centre outwards, before repeating the pattern. Noah analyzed my movements for a moment longer, and I sat up, turning my body to face him.

He watched me, eyes still filled with worry but transitioning to appreciation, before he closed his eyes, pushing his face into the side of mine affectionately. He stayed there for a moment, the soft breath of his exhale brushing across my cheek. With my free hand, I reached up, pushing the bangs delicately out of his face, running my hands through his hair, hoping the sensations helped distract him from his anxiety, even for a brief moment.

I felt sympathy for him, knowing that this must be the anxiety Nick mentioned that Noah’s struggled with lately. Fans have been crazy, and for someone who has always had a low social battery, I can imagine it must be even more difficult for him.

I gave Noah a small smile, before leaving in, giving him a delicate kiss of love and confidence, showing him that he is supported.

“Better?” I whispered, and Noah squeezed my hand in response, eyes lingering on me for a moment more before he let out another breath.

“I don’t know how I survived so long without you.” He whispered back, almost sighing in relief.

I couldn’t help but blush, resting my head on him again, and he wrapped his arm around me now, leaning me into his chest.

Once we arrived we were rushed into the building. Thankfully there were no fans out yet because we were so early- but I was glad because otherwise, rumours would start. Noah held my hand the entire way, only letting go once we arrived at the green room, and him heading to the washroom.

My eyes followed him as he left, the door closing quickly. I then turned to look at Ruffilo who patted me on the head.

“Nice work Y/N/N.” he hugged me, and I breathed into his chest, sighing.

Folio nodded in agreement, “Wow. I haven’t seen him calm down that fast in a while.”

I frowned, looking at the three of them sadly, “this is a usual occurrence?”

Jolly nodded, “unfortunately. Ever since the fans found out shit about where we lived and dug up stuff from his past, he hasn’t been the same.”

I turned, watching the door, waiting for Noah to return, “that breaks my heart.”

The boys nodded, agreeing.

“But honestly, we still have a fuck ton of fun,” Ruffilo said, reassuring me.

“Yea,” Folio said, beginning to drum the air, “now we get to fuck around until sound check.”

I laughed, “And that means?”

“Tomfoolery,” Jolly said, a glint in his eye, “and shots!”

+=+=

“Fuck I hate vodka,” Noah grumbled, eying the shot glass with a look of disgust, lip curling.

“Don’t be such a pussy, Sebastian,” I raised a brow, the boys cheering as I downed the shot, my nose scrunching as the alcohol burned my throat.

Noah plugged his nose before shooting it back, shaking his head as he swallowed it, coughing.

“That shit is literally vile,” he whined, chugging some juice to mask the flavour.

“Don’t be so dramatic pretty boy, you’re fine,” Jolly laughed, patting Noah’s back.

“You don’t know shit about fuck,” Noah glared, laughing.

“I don’t know shit about fuckin, but I know shit about everything else!” Jolly said, downing a shot himself, and I laughed, smiling harder than I probably have in years.

“Aight boys, time for soundcheck,” Noah said, before extending a hand for me to take. Entwining our fingers he led me with them. I had to admit this was very exciting, getting to see the process of how behind the scenes worked.

Once each section was set up, Folio started drumming, and I watched in amazement as his feet followed his arms, beginning to alternating patterns, hitting the double beat and cymbals.

“He’s extremely talented!” I said, appreciating the opportunity to watch Nick without any other sound present- just the drummer.

“Folio is a complete animal on stage.” Noah agreed, folding his arms and watching in approval.

It was Ruffilo’s turn next, then Jolly, and then Noah.

Noah held the mic close, fiddling with his earpiece, hitting a variety of notes. I watched in amazement, falling completely in love with his ‘acoustic’ voice. It was rare that I got to hear him bare, without any music.

Once they finished, they packed up, and Noah explained how the rest of the show was going to work. They were going to let the audience in soon.

“Are you sure you want to stay in the crowd?” Noah asked, reluctant.

I nodded reassuringly, “of course! I gotta get the bad omen experience.” I couldn’t help but laugh. Nick joined us, placing an arm across my shoulders.

“But- how else is he supposed to get a good luck kiss between songs?” Ruffilo teased as I leaned into him, slapping his chest playfully.

I scoffed, rolling my eyes, “he never needed those before and did just fine.”

Noah gave me a cheeky grin, “ok but now that I can have a good luck kiss, it’s gotta be a ritual now.”

I shook my head, smiling at him, “Whatever, I’m going to go get my fangirl on.”

I turned into Nick, squeezing him, “break a leg, but not literally,” I said.

“I’ll try not to or will I-“ he laughed, before turning to head to Folio and Jolly.

“I’ll let security know to keep an extra close eye on you, I don’t want you getting hurt- especially if a wall of death breaks out.” Noah said cautiously, “And I want you to be against the bar the entire time, and make sure to stay centred so I can keep an eye on you, ok?”

I tilted my head to the side, giving him a ‘really’ look.

“Noah,” I grabbed his t-shirt by the collar, standing on my tiptoes as I pulled him close to me, noses inches apart. Noah’s breathing quickened, his lips parting gently as his eyes trailed between my mouth and eyes rapidly.

“I’ll be okay,” I whispered, closing the gap between our lips, and kissing him hard. Our mouths moved together, Noah wrapping his arms around me, folding into each other.

I pulled away, Noah following reluctantly, moaning in protest.

“Good luck,” I said, giving him a reassuring smile.

Noah kissed me again quickly, before letting me pull away. As I turned to follow security, he grabbed my wrist, holding me for a moment, his eyes darkening. I watched him confused, before the sentence left his lips.

“Don’t forget what I said, you better be backstage by the time Dethrone is finished.”

A flash of heat washed throughout my body as I nodded, and Noah smiled. “Good. See you soon princess.”

Noah walked away, turning back once to give me a brief wink, and I flushed, following security towards the stage. I hopped down, standing right against the barricade.

Within fifteen minutes the venue started filling, the string of fans running towards the front, some even beginning to push into my back. I held onto the bar firmly, not letting myself be shoved to leave the spot. I shared eye contact with a security guard and I nodded, reassuring him I was okay.

About an hour went by, and eventually, the lights went dark, and the fans erupted into a roar.

I too began screaming, the adrenaline of excitement coursing through my veins. Seconds later the stage lit up with a visual, a video beginning to play. Noah, lying on a mattress with an initiation mask began speaking:

Why do you care about these people?

They don’t care about you- none of them?

They don’t even know you- because you haven’t shown them.

Black and white visuals flashed on the screen, and my heart raced with excitement.

Every day, you’ll wake up, and there’ll be less of you.

You live your life for them,

and they don’t even see you.

You don’t even see yourself.

Jolly walked out on stage, still completely dark, but the guitar riff to artificial suicide began.

Can you hear me through the white noise?

Fans screamed, bodies pushing against me in excitement, waiting for the brunette god to walk onto the stage.

The bass dropped, Folio’s drum beat taking over Jolly’s riff, as Ruffilo walked across the stage, masked, bass pumping through my ears. Fans howled again.

“Can you hear me you sick fucks?”

The crowd went feral.

Noah strutted into the stage, the embodiment of confidence and poise, swinging his arms before stopping mid-stage, gazing over the crowd, a hand covering his chest in appreciation for the turnout. His face was covered, only his eyes and mouth barely visible, as a black jacket and hood covered his body- it was almost a shame he was so modest, but I knew that in a few songs, he would strip, leaving himself exposed in that tight, black, vest top me and every other Noah fan admired.

“Can you hear me through the white noise!” He screamed into the mic, raising it in the air as smoke filled the venue, and I hollered in awe, yelling for my boys.

“Soaked in the neon glows

Silver-forked tongues talking to you in the digital snow

A glitch in the chain, a loop in the brain

You wanted to break, but you still wanna play the game!”

Noah bobbed around the stage, Jolly and Ruffilo head banging and I took it all in. The lights flashing, the smoke, the raging excitement radiating from the crowd- I smiled, eyes brimming with tears. I couldn’t help but feel proud of Noah and Nick, almost in disbelief that this was for them. They’ve grown so much, and it was entirely different getting to be part of the crowd myself compared to watching them online.

I screamed until my lungs felt raw, my throat burning, sweat dripping down my face.

All of this time sitting inside, sitting in the dark

And every night I can see why you could never stop, yeah

Lying is hard, and the truth comes out anyway

You're going way too far, gonna drop dead at this rate

Noah sat in front of me now, singing into his mic, his hair covering his eyes as I watched, completely fascinated.

There's no another way, don't let me go

Don't dig another grave today

I'll make the same mistakes, I'll never know

Who I was before I faded away into the grey

I gazed at Noah as he walked across the stage slowly, singing intentionally with every word, eyes scanning the crowd before he landed on me.

The song finished, and there was a short break, before Noah came back, jacket gone, the only thing remaining a pair of black cargo pants, boots, and that stupid fucking tank top.

The lighting defined Noah’s arms, his tattoos glistened from the sweat, and my heart began to race once again. My mind began to race with a million thoughts, but it kept landing on how good he’d look with his head tilted back as I took him in my mouth- or how much I wanted him to give me everything from behind, hands wrapped around my throat.

“What is up my friends!” Noah boomed, waving his arms, as the crowd yelled.

“We are bad omens and we are so fucking thankful to be here tonight!”

Nick hit the kick peddle of the drum kit in excitement, acknowledging the fans.

“We are gonna play an old song for ya, how does that sound?”

The crowd cheered.

“Who knows if I’m there?”

The crowd screamed again.

There are scars that'll never ever show themselves

You get when you're left alone too long in Hell

They tried to keep in the secrets that you wouldn't tell

But they just stripped you for parts you had to sell

Noah crouched in front of the crowd, reaching his arms out. He followed down the front, until stopping right in front of me. Arm extended, the body of hands around me grabbing onto his arms, but he left his hand open.

Noah sang into the mic, watching my eyes with every move. I stared up at him with a smile breaking out onto my face.

Well, if I'm there to catch you when you fall

You'll have a friend down in Hell after all

And if you're there to catch me when I fall

Then maybe Hell ain't so bad after all

I didn't want to believe how much you needed help

And I just left you to be all by yourself

And now I wish I had seen that you weren't doing well

But I just came back to see how hard you fell

I raised my arm, grabbing onto Noah’s hand, feeling my breath hasten as an immense amount of emotions washed over me. Here I was, being sung to, in front of thousands of people- yet it felt like it was just me and Noah.

His words were for me, and my heart raced, pounding out of my chest as we gazed at each other. He squeezed my hand before letting go, making his way down the rest of the stage.

There was a short intermission, and I felt my phone buzz.

Checking it, I noticed Noah texted.

‘Don’t forget what I said.’

I chuckled, shaking my head as I responded.

‘I’ll be there you dork. You guys sound fucking amazing, you’re killing it.’

Seconds later, Noah responded.

‘Don’t take your eyes off me for this next one.’

My breath hitched in my throat, and the lights dimmed inside the venue again, before the bass began, introducing The Death of Peace of Mind.

My mind began to race again, and as Noah stepped onto the stage, his eyes immediately latched onto me.

I made another mistake, thought I could change

Thought I could make it out

Promises break, need to hear you say

You're gonna keep it now

I miss the way you say my name

The way you bend, the way you break

Your makeup running down your face

The way you touch, the way you taste

When the curtains call the time

Will we both go home alive?

It wasn't hard to realize

Love's the death of peace of mind

You're in the walls that I made with crosses and frames

Hanging upside down

For granted, in vain, I took everything

I ever cared about

Noah never broke eye contact during the entire song. Despite walking across the entire stage, his eyes never left mine- and I refused to let mine leave his.

I miss the way you say my name

The way you bend, the way you break

Your makeup running down your face

The way you fuck, the way you taste

Noah ‘Look at me’ Sebastian let his fingers flow to his lips, taking the shape of a V as he licked between them, the crowd going ballistic. I felt my own stomach begin to churn.

You come and go in waves

Leaving me in your wake

You come and go in waves

Swallowing everything

Are you satisfied?

The crowd screamed again, and once the song finished the introduction to Dethrone began. I motioned over the security, who helped me crawl over the barrier and escorted me away from the crowd. As I headed up the stage and walked behind the curtain, I watched the side view of the performance, the boys thrashing out their last song of the night, all energy put into this song.

Here am I, take me to the pearly gates

So I can look you in the eye when I spit in your face

Here am I, take me to the pearly gates

Don't let 'em hit you on the way out when I take your place

As soon as the song finished they walked off stage, the crowd screaming behind them. All the boys smiled as they passed me, nodding sweatily. Noah on the other hand immediately grabbed me, kissing me firmly.

“Good fucking girl.” He said, smiling as his chest heaved with exhaustion. My face blushed again, especially knowing everyone around us heard his praise.

The crowd was screaming behind us again, and the boys had two minutes to compose themselves before going out to wave and bow. I waited patiently, watching them run out and smile with gratitude at the fans below them, throwing an assortment of picks and guitar sticks.

After a few minutes, the boys came back, and before I could say anything Noah instantly grabbed my wrist, pulling me along with him.

“Where are we going?” I asked, confused, but my insides bubbled with excitement.

“I want you in all the ways you’ll let me have you,” Noah muttered through gritted teeth, sending my heart into a frenzy of nerves. He tugged me through the halls, before finding a door, shoving me into the room.

It appeared to be a smaller version of a green room, the only things inside being a washroom and a couch. Almost like it was placed here just for us.

Locking the door swiftly behind him, Noah led me to the black letter couch sitting down, pulling me onto his lap.

I straddled him, his hands working their way underneath my skirt, gripping at the now-exposed skin.

“You didn’t wear shorts?” Noah moaned, almost instantly hardening at the realization. His tattooed hands ran along the back of my thighs, squeezing periodically, bringing his lips into my neck, biting at the skin gently.

“Do I turn you on that much?” I breathed hastily, closing my eyes, enjoying Noah’s worship over my body. He was fully indulging in me, taking every moment for himself.

“You don’t even fucking know,” he whispered, tugging the shirt off of my body, letting his lips trail across my shoulders, “the only thought I’ve had lately is what it would be like getting to eat you out after performing.”

I smiled at his words, closing my eyes as his lips trailed along my torso, my hips beginning to grind into his. “Are we— are we really going to do this here?”

Noah hummed in response, squeezing me to symbolize a yes.

“Let’s make your thoughts a reality then?” I whispered, and Noah’s eyes leered at me, completely insatiable with hunger.

His hands roamed across my body, and as I rotated on top of him, digging my core into his own, he let out a low groan, body thrusting upwards, slowly.

Noah’s hands pulled away my underwear, leaving me fully exposed underneath my skirt. “God I love the idea of you having nothing on underneath this, such easy access.”

I heard voices passing down the hall, and my head snapped towards the door, chest pounding.

“Th-There are people outside this door—” I said, pushing off Noah slightly, but his inked arms wrapped around me, pulling me back.

“Well, this isn’t about them, is it?” Noah said, chuckling lowly, “Just sit on my fucking face already.”

Noah stayed sitting, but pushed himself deeper into the couch as I crawled up, allowing myself to be right above him, almost hanging over the couch; his breath left a cooling sensation on my skin, and I shuddered in anticipation.

“Spread your legs for me,” Noah demanded, pulling at my thighs.

“Spread them wider,” he said, and I tried, splitting myself completely for his need.

“Noah, please,” I whimpered, my body soaking for him, yet dreaded not being touched.

“Look at you,” he tskd, letting his long fingers rub along my folds, “coming undone before I’ve even started touching you.”

“Please,” I whispered ever so lightly, gripping into the back of the couch.

Noah’s fingers danced around my skin for a moment longer before he explored my body, inviting himself into my space and causing my thighs to desire to squeeze shut; but Noah held a firm grip, forcing me against his mouth. His tongue circulated me, before he sucked, moaning against my sensitive skin.

“Jesus Christ, I love the way you taste,” Noah slapped my behind, squeezing so hard I knew there would be a mark. I winced at the impact, but my body began to convulse against his lips as he assaulted me where I needed him most.

“F-Fuck, I don’t think I’m gonna last long if you keep doing that,” I moaned, rolling myself into his skin, trying to create more friction for my need. One of Noah’s hands left my skin, trailing down towards his cargo pants as he freed himself, and began to touch his own body.

“I want you to fuck me so bad Noah,” I cried, pushing into him desperately as I watched him pleasure his own impulse, slim fingers cascading through his heat.

“You’ll get that once we get home.” He said, panting from beneath me, “I want you to come all over my face.”

My mouth hung open as my orgasm built, ears began to ring. I let out a moan way louder than intended, causing Noah to begin to thrust into his hips, his body twitching with complete craving. His breathing quickened and I felt him struggle against me as I cried out, pushing against him one final time as I came undone, and Noah released all over his taped hand, rubbing out his own desire.

I panted, pulling myself off of his face and down into his lap, sitting on his mess.

“Imagine how amazing you’ll sound when I’m fucking you senseless.” Noah’s eyes were closed as he smiled and tilted his head back in satisfaction, out of breath.

After a moment I pulled him into a kiss, and we whispered praises against one another’s lips, which was met with gentle moans.

“I love getting to know you like this.” He sighed, pulling back to look at me as we heaved together, exhausted.

I smiled at him, pressing my forehead against his own, appreciating what Noah and I had begun to build amongst our friendship.

I kissed him again, softly, my body flushing with heat again, “Will you let me ride you when we get back?”

Noah’s deep October eyes opened with lust, staring me down once again with an immense amount of need. “Only if you moan my name for everyone to hear.”

Oh god help me

#noah sebastian #noah sebastian smut #bad omens x reader #noah sebastian and reader #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian fluff #noah sebastian davis #bad omens smut #bad omens band #bad omens #metal #metalcore #heavy metal #smut #I was always yours

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chrollosbm · 4 months

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Sunflower Fields: a Choso Love Story Chapter Twelve

art cr: umbra3terna on x

You're broken from a past relationship, thinking you only deserve the worst. Choso comes along, making you realize you deserve the world and more. Will your ex-boyfriend let you go without a fight? (Choso x black!reader, yandere Choso)

Previous Chapters

pls support me on ao3, it would mean the world to me!

You woke up annoyed to a knock on your bedroom door, and you attempted to ignore it, wanting to get more rest. You weren’t sure what time it was, but the sunlight coming into your room was basically blinding. All you wanted to do was crawl under the covers and get more sleep with last night’s events keeping you up in curiosity.

After coming to your senses about the situation between Choso and Suguru, you of course ran to Choso to figure out what the hell went down. In all honesty, you didn’t care at all for your ex-boyfriend’s well-being, even if he was on the ground gushing blood. He was alive and coherent, which was enough for you.

“Choso…what the fuck?” The smile that was on your face was long gone by now, your body movements stiff as you charged over to him. His grin remained though, eyes sinister as his body on the other hand language was surprisingly laxed, clearly not seeing the severity of the situation. His calmness was slightly eerie, causing a stir in your stomach, but you wrote it off as him still being in shock, trying to convince yourself he wasn’t some crazed psychopath who got off on inflicting harm to others. Violence didn’t scare you, but when it was unnecessary, it just plain bothered you. You knew that Choso and Suguru’s fight had to be over you, in your head, it couldn’t have just been a coincidence that two men you’d dated had a random bar fight, so you knew it wasn’t a useless brawl.

Blood was trailing down the corner of his red stained mouth and you used your thumb to attempt to clean a bit of it off, scoffing in the process, and he let you, eyes softening at your gesture. He grabbed your hand shortly after you were finished and pulled you closer, bloody hands finding your waist, with you not caring that it was ruining your outfit.

“Sorry, I seemed to have run into someone from your past and couldn’t stop myself from bashing his smug face in.” His features hardened again as his dark eyes squinted, veins in his neck tightening as he looked at Suguru who was now being lifted off the ground by the security guard, being shooed away as he yelled vulgar obscenities about the altercation that just took place. It was hard to ignore the insults he was throwing out at Choso, your own eyes peering as he called him a “downgrade.” It took everything in you not to throw in your own jabs at the man talking endless shit, but you decided he’d probably taken enough of a beating tonight. You still had somewhat of a heart. Plus, you had nothing to prove to him, Choso was in a totally different league than Suguru, far better in every department.

You didn’t notice you were shaking until Choso grabbed your waist tighter, his brows furrowing at you. His eyes were panicked when you looked at him before he spoke. “Baby, did I scare you?” He stammered. “I didn’t mean to frighten you-I didn’t think you would have to witness this side of me, I just-”

You cut him off with a small and quick kiss, his puffy lips tasting metallic as yours touched his, your shaking seeming to seize almost immediately. “Don’t be.” Your voice came out soft, wanting to make sure what you were saying was of the most sincerity. “I don’t know what happened-I don’t even think I want to know. I had a horrible night and coming out to see you beating my cheating ex-boyfriend to a pulp brought me more joy than a fucking kid on Christmas morning.” You beamed at him, all teeth showing as you placed your hands on his chest, his fast beating heart seeming to slow as each word came from your mouth.

He ran one of his dried blood stained hands through his hair, unintentionally taking out the other loose bun in his head, and let out a large sigh he seemed to be holding in, before smiling down at you, toothy as well. “Who knew you were such a sadist?” He laughed, that innocent glimmer back in his chocolate eyes. The atmosphere seemed less tense then, with Suguru’s shouts silencing as he was finally removed from the area by the brunette woman he was accompanied by.

A louder knock snapped you out of your thoughts, along with a familiar, even louder voice. “I know you heard me! You have five seconds to answer before I burst in there.” Your older sister’s noisy voice blared through your closed door and you sat up, defeated, before shouting back at her to enter already. She came in immediately after the words left your lips, your younger sister trailing behind her with a scowl on her face, immediately shielding herself from the sun shining through your windows.

“God, ever heard of blackout curtains? It’s like you live right next to the sun or some shit.” Opal complained, before face planting on your bed, bumping you roughly in the process, making you scowl at the back of her head. “My head is killing me, I’m literally never drinking again.” Her voice was muffled in your sheets as she let out a loud groan.

You rolled your eyes, laughing at her pain in the process. That’s what she gets for drinking more than she could handle. “You can follow through with that after tonight. I’m invoking my birthday privileges for you to party with your older sister one last night.” You crossed your legs under the blanket, a smug smirk on your face.

Valerie lips tugged as well as she leaned her head on your doorframe, and to your surprise nodded in agreement. “Yeah, baby sis. You can’t punk out the last night. It’s not like you don’t get this drunk or worse while you’re away at university.” You were shocked she was also trying to convince your younger sister, with her being the responsible one and all, but you didn’t question it, as you knew this was definitely a one time thing.

You nodded vigorously, cosigning her statement as Opal lifted her head momentarily to flip the both of you off. “Whatever.” She replied. “I’m going to need a nap though. A long one.” She turned her body towards the wall, signifying she meant right this moment, and you giggled before turning back towards Valerie, whose face was suddenly reading concern.

“What?” You asked at her demeanor change, knowing her all too well. She could never hide her facial expressions, you were a lot like her in that way.

Her body tensed slightly, before walking over to your bed, and basically sat on you, prompting you to move your body so she could lie down, forcing you between your two sisters, one who seemed to already be sleeping soundly.

“We need to talk about last night.” She insisted, and you cringed inwardly, knowing this moment was coming.

“About?” You asked, feigning cluelessness, not wanting to have this conversation whatsoever.

“About Choso.” Her words were stressed and your face scrunched at her sudden change of tone. It reminded you of when you were younger and had to get a rare scolding from her, it was a “motherly” voice she put on, showing you that what she had to say was going to be of significant importance.

You looked down from her then, suddenly feeling too small to look her in her eyes before she continued when you didn’t respond.

“Sweetheart, I know you like him and he does seem to treat you well, but that fight last night? You know that was unacceptable.” She let out a sigh and folded her arms over the comforter before continuing. “Granted, Suguru probably deserved it, but did you even ask the details of what happened? How it started?”

To be completely honest, you didn’t have the answers to her questions. You didn’t even know why the two of them were near the club to begin with. You figured you didn’t want to know any of the details before, but Valerie’s inquisitions were making you rethink things, making you crave the answers now. There was another part of you though, that believed ignorance was bliss, with you content in the birdseye view that Suguru had gotten a well-deserved ass whooping for breaking your heart. There was definitely not a nagging feeling inside you that Choso played a part in this situation, with you also wondering what the hell he was doing there in the first place. It didn’t take you long to shake your head at your sister’s inquiry and your thoughts that seemed to take a turn, in which she let out another sad sigh.

“Please just be careful, sis. You seem to attract these crazed, obsessive men and-”

You quickly cut her off, suddenly offended by her words in insulting Choso. “Choso is not crazy or obsessive. He’s someone I care about immensely and has done nothing but protect me from the actual insane man within this whole equation.” Your head shot up as you spoke, words and eyes seemingly piercing through your older sister. She can say what she wants about Suguru, with both Valerie and Opal at the receiving end of your endless cries and breakdowns from each time the two of you had a fight or broken up, but hearing any sort of criticism on Choso was where you drew the line. He hadn’t been the one stomping on your heart, inciting fear in you, that had been Suguru.

Her eyes softened suddenly, making you feel a pang of guilt at your unexpected outburst. “I wasn’t saying he was crazy or obsessive, I was just saying you tend to attract these sorts of men for some awful reason. I’m just warning you to tread lightly.” Her hand grabbed yours before giving a small squeeze. “I don’t want you to end up hurt again. You have no idea the agony I felt knowing you were hurting everyday for two years because of that cheating asshole.”

Your heart swelled at her words, really feeling like shit for snapping on her now, as she was only trying to help. Your older sister had always been protective over you, she had to be with your parents up and disappearing, making her fight to keep the three of you together as you hopped from one foster home to another. She had fought for custody at such a young age, taking on the burden of raising two children with only one income, working herself silly. She was your superwoman, there to shield you from harm and defend you from anything thrown your way.

You squeezed her hand in return, before reaching over to give her a complicated side hug, due to your uncomfortable position in bed. “I’m sorry. I know you’re just trying to protect me.” You said into the hug with sincerity, prompting her to press her body against yours tighter.

“Don’t worry about it. He does seem like a nice guy for what it’s worth.” The two of you pulled away and she was smiling, her grin almost identical to yours, along with that twinkle in her eyes. “Plus, it is kind of romantic that he beat your ex-boyfriend’s butt for you.” She giggled and you laughed in return before sitting back on your headboard with a small sigh and a smile.

Last night, before your Uber could arrive, Choso basically forced you and your sisters to cancel the ride, insisting on driving you home instead. You had tried to decline, claiming he was in no mental state to drive, but he’d easily convinced you otherwise, with that domineering tone in his voice claiming that he wasn’t taking no for an answer, anyway, making you heed to his orders.

This prompted a slightly awkward introduction of your small family to the man you were currently seeing.

“Uh…well, this is Choso.” You introduced him to your sisters with a small voice in a ‘ta-da’ motion, when Valerie and Opal (by the grace of God,) stumbled across the street, identical worried looks on their features, brows furrowed and mouths twisted into frowns.

Choso rubbed the back of his neck, sporting a small smile before you continued.

“Choso, these are my sisters I told you about, Valerie and Opal.” You pointed to your siblings as you said their names and Valerie gave him a blank look in return, obviously not liking her first impression of him, and you couldn’t blame her, he’d just been in a pretty bloody altercation.

Your younger sister on the other hand, had a mouthful to say. “Jesus, sis! You didn’t tell us he was fucking hot.” She slurred and your cheeks warmed, eyes widening as well before she continued. “I mean, you did say he was hot, but fuck-”

“That’s enough.” Valerie cut in before linking her arm with your younger sibling, who was currently protesting, claiming she did nothing wrong. She was ignored though, before your older sister spoke again with conviction. “If you’re gonna give us a ride, do it now please so we can get her to bed.”

Opal’s scoffs and objections were loud as you turned to Choso whose cheeks were red as he looked at you with an unreadable look in his eyes. Your eyes pleaded with his and he quickly nodded, understanding you without words, before clearing his throat. “Yeah, of course. Let me lead you to where I parked.”

The car ride back wasn’t too awkward, with Opal’s excessive babbling about the security guard who you’d soon learned name was Ino. Apparently, they were the same age and she had gotten his number, claiming she was already “in love.” That earned her a scolding from both you and Valerie, with Choso listening in, letting out small chuckles and hand squeezes to yours every now and then.

“Yeah, he’s a sweetheart.” You’d said softly with a yawn, suddenly tired and wanting to catch up on some rest just as Opal had the brilliant idea of doing. It wasn’t long before you fell into a deep slumber, your lifelines on either side of you as warmth.

It was evening when you’d finished getting ready. Apparently, you, your sisters, and Andrea were all going out to dinner as part of your birthday celebration. The three of you had to pick her up from her apartment first, Andrea claiming it was smart to just go in one car instead of two and she was right, of course, since you were all going to the same place, anyway.

You looked in the mirror, admiring yourself. You had on a brown, thick, long sleeve fitted dress that reached your mid-thigh that you paired with sheer, barely visible stockings and your prized cream colored pair of red bottoms that Valerie bought you a few Christmases ago. Your dark hair was curled down your back, thanks to Valerie’s hairstyling skills. Opal did your makeup, giving you a light face beat, accentuating your natural beauty.

“You ready to go?” Your oldest sibling said from the corner of the room, dressed modestly compared to you, wearing all black again.

“Ready!” you blurted out, as you grabbed your small, cream colored arm purse, before leading them out of your mess of a bedroom, makeup and hair products everywhere, that you would deal with later.

The three of you pulled up to Andrea and Kento’s apartment and you were confused from the passenger seat as Valerie took the key out of the ignition. “I thought we were just picking her up?” You’d questioned, squinting your eyes between your siblings who were sporting poker faces.

A flamboyantly dressed Opal responded too quickly for your liking, that squint in your eyes never faltering. “She said there’s a gift for you to pick up first, then we’ll be on our way!” She jumped out the backseat and yelled “Come on!” at you when you didn’t immediately get out after her.

“I’m coming, jeez.” You rolled your eyes and stepped out of your older sister’s car, still silently questioning what was going on. They seemed rushed earlier in the day after your nap, forcing you in the shower while basically glued to their cellphones. You’d brushed it off earlier, not caring much as you were getting ready for the night anyway, but now you were wondering what all that was about now.

You pulled out the key to your best friend’s place as you walked towards the Nanami’s residence. She’d also had a set for your apartment, and while the two of you rarely used them, it was useful now. You stepped up to unlock her apartment door and your sisters trailed behind you silently. You opened the door to a completely dark room, causing you to look around in said darkness, confusion written on your features.

“The fuck…” You started as you walked inside, attempting to look for the light switch, when a flicker of a light and a loud “Surprise!” came out of nowhere, causing you to basically jump out your skin.

Your eyebrows were raised as you looked around the room to see it was full of people, balloons, and happy birthday decorations. You saw familiar faces from work and your university smiling at you, causing your heart to swell at the sight. They all came for you? You’d figured you didn’t have many friends anymore, with you falling off the face of the earth when you were involved in that previous toxic relationship of yours.

Your eyes were searching for a certain face in particular, when Andrea ran up, beaming at you with a loud squeal, and gave you a huge hug, making you almost fall down in the process. You laughed and the smile widened on your face. “Happy birthday, bitch!” She yelled in your face as you pulled away from the hug, eyes lit up like the sun, so grateful it was making you forget you were supposed to be upset with her for leaving the previous night.

Kento was beside her smiling, and soon gave you a small, awkward hug. “Happy birthday.” He spoke curtly and politely, in which you gave him a thank you with a big grin. You were thankful for him as well, for last night and for this party he played a part in as well.

It didn’t take long for you to start making your rounds around the large living room, making conversation with everyone and catching up, being sure to thank them for coming in the process. It was good to catch up with everyone, with it all feeling so natural as you talked to each and every one of your old friends.

It wasn’t long before Andrea was at your side, linking her arm through yours. You looked at her with raw emotion as tears blurred your vision. “Did you do all of this?”

She gave you a smile. “As much as I want to take all the credit, it wasn’t just me.” Andrea joked and you let out a small giggle. “Your sisters helped too.” You looked over at your siblings and they were currently in the kitchen, playing a drinking game with some of your old university friends. Your heart warmed as the tears threatened to fall from your eyes.

“You better not start crying, your makeup looks too damn good for that!” Andrea all but shouted. “I have one more surprise for you.” Your brows furrowed as she pointed to her balcony. “There’s one more surprise for you out there. I’ll let you go get it yourself.” She smirked at you, then let your arm go. Before you could respond, she walked away quickly and joined whatever drinking game everyone was playing.

You walked towards their large balcony, heart hammering in your chest at what you already knew was behind those doors.

As soon as you opened the balcony doors, you were greeted by the cool air, along with endless vases of yellow sunflowers covering the ground. There seemed to be an incredible number of them, as there was only a small walkway free from the plants that led to Choso, who was currently sitting down on one of the lawn chairs, seemingly unaware that you’d entered his vicinity. Your heart raced at the scene before you, with all the blood seemingly rushing to your head, causing your face to feel hot despite the cold weather. Those tears you were holding in were set free, with a couple falling in which you dabbed away quickly with the back of your hand as a small sniff left your body.

His eyes snapped towards yours, seeming to hear your sniffles and he stood to his feet immediately. Your eyes caught his concerned ones and you smiled widely at the sight of the handsome man, with his hair down in a dark beanie, and he was sporting a silver chain and his bright earrings. He was dressed in all black, with a thick black jacket over a t-shirt with baggy jeans and Doc Martens on his feet.

Choso all but ran over to you and immediately enveloped you in a kiss with his soft lips. His arms wrapped around your entire body, warming you up. You were giggling from the rough and urgent kiss he was giving you as you felt him smile back into the kiss, not letting you go. “You’re crying, but you’re laughing.” He stated as a question when he pulled away, not helping your chuckles.

“I’m crying because I’m happy.” You let out and he let out a breath of relief he seemed to be holding in.

“Okay, good. I thought you didn’t like it for some reason.” He tilted his head down at you, before swiping away a tear that threatened to roll down your face, giving you a small closed-lipped smile.

You shook your head at his ridiculous assumption, looking into his pools of darkness that seemed to twinkle like stars in the night. “I love it.”

His smile remained at your response, as he placed a soft kiss on your cheek, before leading you to the chair on the corner of the large balcony, the only other place not covered by flowers. He sat first before placing you onto his lap sideways, his strong thighs holding you up with ease as he burned holes into you, taking you in.

“You look fucking ravishing.” He breathed out, sincerity on his face. “Fucking stunning, beautiful, perfect, angelic.” He looked you up and down, taking a long time to admire you completely, causing your organs to stir and feel hot as his dark eyes scanned you, not missing a single detail. “I’m so lucky.” He continued, before those dark orbs looked back into yours, a small smile playing on his lips.

Your cheeks were burning at this point, all self-consciousness thrown off the balcony as each compliment left his perfect pink lips. “Thank you, Choso.” You beamed, before wrapping your arms around his neck and resting your head on his chest, feeling his rapid heartbeat that sped up as you held him tighter.

You gave a shiver, suddenly remembering how cold it was outside in the night, before Choso took off his jacket and put it over your shoulders, before wrapping his large arms around your waist, warming your heart at his gentlemen-like gesture.

“I have something to ask you.” His deep voice suddenly rumbled against the side of your head, causing you to lift your head to look up at the man who spoke, a red blush on his cheeks as nervous his eyes peered into yours, before continuing. “Will you be my girlfriend, sunflower? Please?”

Your eyebrows lifted at the question, heart hammering out your chest like a comedy TV show character. You? Choso Kamo’s girlfriend? As unhinged as you were, this kind, patient, incredible man wanted you to be his? You felt like you were in a dream and you had to refrain from pinching yourself as that probably wouldn't be socially acceptable in this situation. Dream or not, you were definitely going to say yes.

“Choso…” You started, water swelling in your orbs again as your lip began quivering. The poor man’s face read shock again, as if he hadn’t grown accustomed to your tears of emotion already, causing you to smile and let out a small laugh before continuing. “Of course I will."

His shoulders relaxed then, a wide smile growing on that beautiful face, his beautiful birthmark scrunching on his nose and eyes crinkling. His soft lips were placed on yours shortly after, moving ferociously against yours, you tasting the saltiness of the tears that had rolled down your face against your will. You felt warm as he enveloped you as if he would never let you go, seemingly afraid you would run away from his embrace, which you never would.

He was yours forever, whether he liked it or not.

Chapter Thirteen is Posted

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mysadcorner · 3 months

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Can I please request Wally West, Batman, Aqualad and Jason todd dating a grunge/Goth reader pls

DC Characters x Alt!Reader Headcanons

-Credit to the gifs owner - Please be specific about characters wanted in headcanons -

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Wally west

Wally would be very supportive of someone who dressed alternatively or goth, especially as it doesn't bother him in the slightest. He's friendly to everyone as much as he can be and for you, he isn't going to behave any differently, except if you start to make your style your whole personality and start to push it on others.

Wally wouldn't be bothered at all by the way you dress and would even encourage it on days you might not feel very confident. If you wanted him to join in and try dressing in a similar style that you do then he will try it out a little bit but he probably wouldn't go all the way and would stick to being subtle in his style change.

More than anything, he would end up wearing accessories due to your influence, maybe some rings, maybe even some other types of jewellery if you encouraged him enough. He wouldn't wear anything that would get in the way too much, but he's the type of guy who would match items with you once he does start trying them out.

When the two of you go shopping together he will happily follow you around and look at all of the new stores or places you drag him too, and you know for certain that he'll volunteer to carry as many bags as he can while you look around. He doesn't complain about how long you're taking unless he's doing it on purpose to be sarcastic, but this is only if you keep him happy with some food on the way.

Wally will instantly defend you from anyone who has anything negative to say about the style of clothes you wear. You'll never have to worry about him not taking your side, but you may need to calm him down due to him getting a bit too loud at times.

Bruce Wayne

We all know what Bruce's type is, so he definitely isn't going to be put off by the way you dress. He will however, try his best to stay professional, so you won't see a noticeable reaction from him at first when you meet him.

Bruce really doesn’t care about lot about different types of fashion, and he won’t really bother knowing much about different types or keeping up to date with trends unless they’re for business or publicity reasons, so don’t expect him to know places that you can get any accessories or clothes himself. He will have plenty of people he can get in contact with though if you are looking to experiment with anything or get deeper into a style.

He naturally leans towards the darker side of things, but outside of being Batman he usually keeps himself pretty simple and clean cut, so you won’t really see him trying anything you usually wear. He may own a few band shirts for his extremely lazy days from when he was younger, but nothing he really keeps up with and is rare you’ll see him wear them.

He isn’t embarrassed to be seen with you, so he’ll have no problem with following you around on shopping trips, and when he’s comfortable with you he can be quite outspoken so he’ll definitely give you his opinion on items if you ask for it. If you don’t want his opinion then he’ll keep his mouth shut and accept anything you like, although you may be able to tell when he seriously hates something by the look in his eyes.

Bruce always knows what to say and how to say it in the heat of the moment, no matter who it is he’s talking to, so he’s always pretty good at defending you before the situation gets out if hand. He always prefers not to use violence, but he can certainly defends you if any idiots try to pull something on you.

Jason Todd

Our sweet boy Jason definitely likes them a little scary or mysterious so having a darker vibe to your outfits or personality will be something he happily accepts just as much as any other style. It may even give him more of a reason to pay attention to you when you first meet him if you don’t immediately express an interest similar to his own, so it’s a good way to get his attention if you don’t have anything to talk about at first.

He understand that you like certain things, but he my really like it when people take too long to get ready or too long to settle down with at the end of the day, so having a long routine while getting ready for the day or getting ready to bed might bother him slightly, although not too much for him to complain a lot about it. He doesn’t really care what you wear in general as long as you like it.

He’ll definitely take an interest in rings when he isn’t out on patrol, and it definitely helps make his already attention drawing hands become more noticeable. He’s only become more inclined to dress the way you do after a long time, but he’ll still keep to his own style mostly, more so taking tiny bits of inspiration from you whenever he feels like changing things up a bit.

Jason doesn’t like long shopping trips, but he does like to spoil you whenever he can, so he’ll go shopping with you but he won’t enjoy it the majority of the time. Not that he would outwardly complain, he’d just sulk behind you and make sarcastic comments until you got the hint that he can’t be bothered to tail around any more stores. Maybe shopping trips in small bursts would be better for Jason to tag along to.

Any comment about you from someone who doesn’t really have a nice thing to say Will get a reaction out of Jason immediately. He isn’t that good at holding him self back when someone says something bad or insults you about how you dress, so he will snap at first. Holding himself back from seriously hurting the person in public will be slightly easier to prevent himself from doing, but that is something he’ll wish he did do for a while afterwards.

Aqualad

He’ll be corps about the way you dress, after all it’s not exactly how the majority of people are seen to dress, so he will look you over and look at the different aspects of your outfit. Overall though he wont give a huge reaction to how you dress, but he’s certainly respectful of it.

Fashion isn’t something he really pays attention to, so you can tell him about as much as you want about the way you dress and different aspects of your style and it’s probably going to be the first time he’s hearing about those things. He will remember everything you say though, and always keeps an eye out for anything you might be interested in just because he knows you like that kind of thing.

He probably would have an interest in dressing like you do, but there’s no problem with that. He’s more than fine with the two of you being completely different people. As long as you’re okay with it too, and don’t try to convince him to change what he wears then there will be absolutely no problem.

If he ends up going shopping with you then he’s going to be looking very closely at all the stuff he sees, usually brace he doesn’t go to the places you buy your clothes so it’s a new experience seeing all the different types of clothes or things related to your style. You may have to drag him away from something after a while if he doesn’t have any intention of going to the next store.

He’s typically a pretty calm person so he won’t be too rowdy if someone makes a negative comment about the way you dress, but he will do his best to defend you and have that person leave you alone before too much trouble can be caused. He may even just lead you away from that person because it isn’t worth the time to deal with meaningless comments from someone you may not even know out in public.

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3cremepie3 · 8 months

Text

Chatterbox

Sypnopsis - Professor Crowley helping you his dear student relive some stress.

Warnings - Smut 18+, Teacher x student, squirting, dirty talk, humiliation, gagging, flattery!

A/n - I was been supposed to get this done. Sorry for the delay I got really busy with school. But it’s out now thanks for the support! And also before anyone starts Y/n is grown. REBLOG PLS!!

“It’s been months since I’ve seen my family! My friends hell even my enemies.” What have you been doing this whole time? Answer me, Crowley,” you demanded!

“Y/n I have a school to run on top of trying to solve your impossible dilemma. For all I know you might’ve fallen from the sky like the tums.” Well, you’re not doing a good job at your school if your students keep overblotting,” you snapped.

You were tired of Crowley's BS that’s why you stormed into his office. You were currently standing over his desk looking his stupid mask in the eyes. He sat on his chair which resembled a bird cage.

“I have to be the one to stop them from dying because conveniently somehow you’re never around. You told me I could be a student here, not a therapist.” As pathetic as it may be you began to cry the built stress of holding back your feelings let loose.

“I need help myself I don’t have time to help others. Please Crowley help me find a way home,” you sobbed. Crowley sighed before clutching you closer to him.

“I'm a generous headmaster I hate to see my students under such stress. Especially beautiful ones that I’m trying to help every day. Crowley pulled your hands away from your face. Here come closer Y/n.” You followed his instructions as he pulled slightly on your arm.

He opened up one of his desk drawers to a file with your name on it. “This is everything I’ve collected on you so far even after using my global resources,” he spoke.”You read through the files while bent over his desk for a better view.

You could see how every lead he got was scratched off. It was hard to read since he had chicken scribble but you got through most of it. Crowley had been trying. But this file just proved one more thing you were never getting home. In a moment of shock you fell back and the tears began to stream again. You were in Crowleys now lap to upset to move. “Sorry Mr. Crowley,” you sniffed. “I can see now that you have been trying.”

“Yes this whole time this situation has been stressful for me as well since you’re quite troublesome on campus,” he joked. You could tell he was trying to lighten the mood. “I guess you have it hard too.” You shifted so that you could look at him not even remembering that you were on his lap.

“Um yeah I guess you could say that,” he coughed. For a second you wondered what he meant by that and then you felt it. His large hard on pressing onto your back. “Oh I should get up,” you yelped.

“No, I don’t mind you staying here. You look too pretty when you cry. And it seems like we could both use a little bit of a stress relief. Look at how tense you are.” He started to massage your shoulders then his hands rolled down to your neck.

You let out a sharp exhale startled by his cold hand on such a sensitive area. He began to grind himself into your now-exposed panties since your skirt was lifted. “I’ll continue only if you want me to Y/n. It’s an honor to make love to someone like me,” he chuckled.

“I’ve never done anything like this Mr. Crowley.” It’s okay I’ll walk you through it there’s no way you won’t enjoy your time with me.” Okay I’ll try then.”

“But are we gonna do it here? What if someone walks in?” They can’t do much to the I'm the headmaster after all.” His hands gripped your ass giving it a firm squeeze. “I don’t know Mister this seems like a bad idea.

“Hey,” you protested. “Just calm down.” His fingers ghosted over your pussy causing you to squirm. “Squirming already I guess you’re nervous. I would be too if I were having sex with me.”

“Shhh just sit and relax.” He put your legs on each side of the chair legs and held your back for support. “Let’s get these useless things off.” He cut off your panties in an instant with his claws.

“Your egos too high,” you spoke. “And your mouth is too smart it would be best if I stuff you quiet.” What huh.” You asked not fully registering what he meant. The leftover fabric of your panties was stuffed in your mouth.

“That’s better.” One of his hands gripped your thigh tighter as the other worked off his golden claws and gloves. You waited watching his every move. His fingers were abnormally long and slender. He also had claw-like fingernails on all but two of his middle fingers. You didn’t think Mr. Crowley would get any pussy he seemed too busy but you were wrong. He knew exactly what to do massaging your clit while teasing your fluttering hole.

Your moans could be heard through your gag. “Feels good huh?” I can tell it does look at how you’ll suck me up.” He inserted his finger then and your heat greedily accepted him.

“See I’m always right!” You ready to take the next one? He questioned inbetween tasting your juices on his finger. You shook your head quickly slightly ashamed at your eagerness. The stretch felt heavenly to the point where you sunk your hips down further on his fingers.

“So needy huh? You needed this Y/n you need me huh?” You shook your head again grinding yourself up and down on his fingers. By now your pussy was so wet it started to make lewd sounds.

They got louder and louder the longer you fucked yourself on his fingers. Crowley sat back admiring the view. Your pussy was on full display since your uniform skirt was lifted. You felt his eyes burning onto you. His gaze wasn’t a judgemental but a loving one.

He realized how much of a slut he just found. He would just have to train you to realize it. But you were quickly breaking out of your box. Your moans were turning into whines. You were close now bouncing on his curved fingers like a fuck rabbit.

Your hands dug into his shoulders landing on his soft feather-filled Shaw. You buried your face in his neck too ashamed to face him. “Most women would get tired by now and want me to fuck them. I guess you young ones have more stamina.”

He was such a talkative asshole you wish that he would shut up. But you couldn’t stop now when you were so close to cumming. You were so close to letting go your juices were dripping down his fingers wetting his dress shirt.

“Such a loud sloppy mess for me. You’re doing so good Let me see how you feel with this.” He stopped all motion leaving you breathless. For a second you were hopeless that he was gonna help you finish. But his hands boosted your thighs up now your pussy was nearing his mouth.

You gasped into your gag you were high up now with no support other than his hair to hold. “Shh calm down I never dropped anyone doing this. Just give in everything will be okay.” He spoke sending vibrations and chills up your already shakey spine. He licked up around your thighs purposefully missing your needy parts. You whined pulling him forward. “Lick here.” You tried to illustrate through your gag.

This was the longest you’ve been edged your entire impatient life. You used your tongue to push your gag out you could’ve taken being bound any longer. “Headmage please I need your mouth. I need to cum or I think I’ll go crazy. Now stop being a fucking tease,” you demanded. “That’s not nice language young lady.” Okay, I’m sorry I’m sorry,” you pleaded.

“Fine, I’ll be kind enough to spare you.” Ahh! You screamed being unexpectedly dropped. You were back on Crowley's lap then you were back on the desk. You spread your legs again and finally after what felt like forever his mouth met your clit.

You wrapped your legs around his head tightly. “You’re not escaping this bit.” No problem I can stay like this for hours,” he murmured. He began to lap up your juices that had pilled up from all his teasing.

“Mmm, that feels good.” Doesn't it baby I heard my head game is superior.” Stop hearing and start focusing,” you instructed. “You’re insufferable,” you sighed. “And you're sweet so sweet,” he explained through slurps.

“Mmm Crowley,” you groaned. “You’re so naughty y/n I feel you twitching on my tongue. Are you about to cum? You must be look at how you’re shaking.” You hadn’t even noticed that how your body was reacting.

“Yes I’m about to cum!” Hmm,” he pondered. “Should I really let you cum? I don’t think this naughty pussy deserves it.” He teased while slapping your clit. You tightened in surprise and sprung up. “Crowley!”

“Fuck please just let me I’ve been waiting so long.” He gave you a reassuring glance latching his mouth to your clit. This time you knew he would allow you to cum. He didn’t let up for a second not even to breathe.

His mask partially lifted but you were too out of it to look at his secret identity. Your vision began to blur so you just shut your eyes as tight as they could go. Crowley didn’t like how your body was pulling away so his arm held your stomach down.

There was no escaping his tounges harsh attack even after you began to cum. He continued prolonging your orgasm. Your toes curled and even the iron grip he had on your waist wasn’t enough to stop you from shaking.

“Fuck I’m gonna! Ahh, I’m gonna squirt if you keep that up,” you warned. “I don’t mind the mess my dear but I do mind your volume.” He explained before pulling you into a smothering kiss.

You let go completely over his lanky fingers. “Headmage!! You screamed into his mouth. His tongue swayed across yours muffling your sound. “Ahh.” You sighed relieved that your edging was over. You were trying to relax your breathing for a moment before you hit Crowley. “What the fuck why are you such a tease?!”

“I have to be and anyways you should be grateful look at how hard you came.” You left my desk all sticky.” Well it’s gonna stay that way,” you chuckled. You slid off his desk pulling your panties back up.

“C’mon don’t leave my little stress reliever. Don’t you want to help your dear Headmage out a little more after I was so kind to you?” He grabbed his buldge and for a second you wanted to go back down on your knees.

But the bell ringing distracted your thoughts. “I need to be a good student like I said earlier. So bye Crowley. You left leaving him a hard insatiable mess.

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moonlessdusk · 4 months

Note

I LOVE THE MKULIA ANALYSIS PLS DO MORE

Like can we talk about the fact that Julia appeared sad/remorseful for screwing over Mk in the baking challenge?? This girl LOVES doing that to the other contestants, this is the one time where she actually wasn't happy with it at all

Yes!! I’ve been thinking a lot about how Julia and MK have been interacting since the merge, tbh.

So once again, when it comes to grouping contestants together, MK and Julia are on opposing sides. I think it’s worth noting that when they make their way to the ingredient raft, Julia and MK don’t target each other’s team. In fact, they go for the assumed power couple/alliance of Priya and Caleb:

You could argue that this is strategic considering that Priya’s team is the largest team but considering Raj took the opportunity to hit MK back in the water when she first tried climbing on the raft, it’s evident that Julia’s teammates aren’t on the same page as her.

Now when we get to the baking section of the challenge and Priya’s team just used their sabotage device on Julia and MK’s team, look at how excited Julia is to sabotage back. This is our reference for when she genuinely doesn’t care about the reactions from the people she’s screwing over:

So somehow the kitchen-quake sabotage didn’t really slow MK down, at least compared to Julia, which I can only assume is because Julia has limited ingredients to work with. So with only 60 minutes left, Julia still mixing, and MK’s cake out of the oven, Julia used her sabotage option and this is her face when she initially pressed the button:

It’s a face that we would normally expect from her when she’s spitefully trying to hurt someone. Maybe she wasn’t fully thinking it through when she pressed it and just got desperate. It’s only when Chris asks who Julia wants to sabotage does it look like Julia actually realizes what she’s about to do and she looks immediately regretful and beside herself over it:

A Julia that doesn’t care who’s she hurting wouldn’t slump her shoulders over like this.

Now, a slight tangent I want to mention is how these two have been acting during challenges since the merge. They’ve been distant and avoiding talking to each other. My theory, which I think is supported by the next episode, is that they don’t want to make their alliance obvious. In theory, it would be advantageous for either to get immunity, but given how Julia already played a dirty trick, it’s fair to assume she’s in danger if she doesn’t win immunity.

Also, everyone else knows that MK specifically cheated pre-merge, but I think it was a choice for MK to not snitch on Julia in the moment, because that would put a target on both their backs post-merge. I think they’re trying to not make it obvious that they’re working together. Maybe MK had a lot of trust in Julia to get her out of the situation. And given who’s left, I don’t think anyone in the field other than the hockey bros has too much of a reason to be weary of them.

⚠️Spoilers for the upcoming episode names and descriptions⚠️

If you assume the descriptions are real, I think it makes sense for Julia to keep Priya and Caleb in the game; Caleb as a hate buffer and Priya as a challenge threat buffer. Keeping them around while keeping them from cooperating with each other makes it so that eyes are kept off of her and MK until it’s safe for them to pick them off individually.

⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️

Back to the episode, MK has this confessional where she says she’s not surprised Julia would use her sabotage on her. Specifically says “Am I surprised Julia would backstab her alliance partner? Yeah, no.” And while her words themselves would mean she doesn’t care, look at her expression. She’s clearly bothered by it, even if she does understand why it had to be done:

And we know by the next episode that this isn’t a one-off line. In fact, look at where Julia and MK are when they’re walking to the elimination ceremony:

These two are almost always walking and sitting right next to each other at this point. Specifically, it looks like Julia is lagging behind, avoiding MK, you could say. On the walk there, we see Julia smile for a moment, but cut to the bonfire and she keep this somber expression throughout it. She has immunity but I think it hits her here that it could’ve been at the cost of MK, if not putting her on the chopping block, then it’s the good will between them.

I just love the setup in this episode because it sets the groundwork for establishing that their care for each other is beyond utility in the competition.

#please ask for more of these because I’m so normal about them #mkulia #td mk #td Julia #total drama spoilers #total drama 2023 #total drama reboot #total drama mk #total drama Julia

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mybworlds · 3 months

Text

CHAPTER 6

status: ongoing

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

summary: your life is full of 'must'. You live with your overprotective mother who controls every aspect of your life. You have a dream, to write romance novels, but love - real love - you haven't found yet. Your mother has even decided what you must do in your free time: play music. One day, however, when you go to your music teacher's house, you will have an unexpected encounter and from that day on things change…

Masterlist

rating: 18+ explicit (minors, DNI)

Before to start... thank you for your support, if you like it pls leave a like/comment/reblog it, if you don't like it don't be rude and keep going. Please remember English is not my first language, so please be merciful!

Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner

You put the key in the lock and you come in your house, you take off your scarf and coat, your boots and you wear your slippers, then you go to the kitchen, but you freeze on the door: your mother is half - naked on a chair in your kitchen.

You turn around and pretend not to see anything, but she must have seen you from the corner of her eyes because she jumps and tries to get dressed clumsily.

The man, perhaps in his mid-fifties, looks at you surprised and upset at being found with his intimacy on show.

"Honey." your mother says, coming toward you.

You back up and make to go toward the door, but your mother stops you by making you turn toward her "Honey, he's a friend. And-- well, I thought you were at work tonight, I thought ..."

"What?" you say for the first time using an icy tone with your mother "How long has this been going on?"

"Almost a year." she replies "I was going to tell you about it sooner or later. I was just waiting for the most opportune moment, but I would have told you, believe me."

"I don't care." you blurt, releasing yourself from her grip and running to get your boots on.

"Where are you going?"

You don't answer her, you put on your coat and scarf again, take your keys and then open the door, think about it for a moment and then turn to her "One thing you have to tell me though, when did you see each other if you're always in the hospital?"

"He's a colleague, honey. And we sometimes used to see each other there, but other..."

You nod "So, you told me to go to the hospital, you were actually with him."

"Listen to me..." she's about to say, but you go through the door and slam it behind you, run down the stairs, and take the main street again.

It's almost ten o'clock at night, it's freezing.

You slip your hands into the pockets of your jacket and start walking.

You don't know where to go, you don't know what to do.

You're not upset that you found your mother in a compromising situation with another man, after all, your father and your mother are as good as separated, he left home that you were six or seven years old so she has every right to rebuild her life.

You still walk, you don't know where you're going.

What hurts you is to think about how many lies there have been in your life, all the obligations you had to follow, even your mother's abuse, how much responsibility she has thrown on you all this time, how many "you must" had to follow and never transgress, but what hurts you the most is her absolute search for truth from you; sure you have omitted things from her lately, but you think that if you had told her all the truth you would never have met Joel or Jack, you wouldn't have begun to get out of that bubble filled with lies in which she forced you to live.

You are so immersed in your thoughts that you didn't realize you were standing in front of Joel's house.

Your eyes pinch for the frost, you hope he's there, you want him to be there.

You knock.

Just once.

You don't have the courage to push.

After a couple of minutes, you see him open the door slightly, holding the latch still on the door, then he realizes it's you, he closes the door again and then throws it wide open "What-- what happened to you?" Joel asks you, widening his eyes with a worried look.

You don't know the look on your face at that moment, but you're definitely torn.

You see him put a rifle down next to the wall and then immediately close the door again.

You'd like to ask him what he's going to do with that, but that's not the pressing question; you have a thousand thoughts in your head, each one more confused than the last.

"Hey, look a' me!" he says, turning towards him and taking your face in his big warm hands, "What are you doing here at this hour?"

You swallow, but you don't know where to start.

"Wait, take this off." he says pointing to your coat "And go by the fireplace, you're freezing."

You nod, "Gimme." he says taking your coat "D' ya want something warm to drink?" he asks again.

"Yes." you reply, nodding.

He opens wide his eyes "Something serious must have happened to answer me yes, sweetheart. Go that way, I'll be right there."

You obey by entering his living room and approaching the couch, you see he was carving wood, no precise shape yet, but your gaze does not linger too much on the carving wood as much as on the crackling fire.

You get closer and the chill you felt up to that moment gives way to shivers and then to intense heat. You squeeze into your shoulders and close your eyes, perhaps you've bothered him.

"Sit down." says Joel behind you, you turn away "Something that warms you right away is just the whiskey, but I don't think it's..."

"It's all right." you say interrupting him.

Joel says your name and then approaches you "You're upset, I don't think tasting whiskey is a good thing."

"It's okay. I'm an adult, I can drink. I'm not a child, Joel," you tell him in a serious tone of voice.

"Will you tell me later what happened? I don't like your dark face," he tells you.

"All right, but there's not much to tell," you say, cutting short.

Joel still looks at your face for a moment and you - still feeling his gaze on you - look away from him and back at the fire. He quickly returns with two glasses, you see him set them down on the coffee table and pour a half-finger of whiskey into both glasses, and then he hands you one.

You sniff that golden liquid first, it's strong, very strong, it almost pinches your nose, then you bring your lips close to the glass and drink a small amount. It stings, you cough.

He, on the other hand, drinks it suddenly and smiles at your reaction.

"Gimme the glass, I'll take it over there."

"I'm not done yet," you note.

"Sweetheart, will you tell me what's going on? You've been acting strange since you came in. D' ya want to tell me?" he tells you, stroking your cheek with the back of his hand.

You sigh, then barely squeeze the glass in your hands and tell him, "Sorry to bother you. I see you were carving something, maybe I disturbed you."

"Baby, you never disturb. You could have come even in the middle of the night. Maybe you should have waited about ten minutes, but I would have let you in anyway. Whenever you want, my house is always open."

You nod with your head down "Thank you."

You take another small sip feeling a warm, burning sensation in your throat.

Joel doesn't speak; he waits for you to say something about it.

You tell him everything, all your thoughts, how you felt, what you thought as you walked through the semi-dark and semi-deserted streets of the town, you tell him about your emotions and how you felt betrayed by your mother.

He says nothing, takes your glass in his hands and lays it on the coffee table and then takes your face in his hands again "My poor little one." he tells you as he strokes your cheekbones with his calloused thumbs "Life with you is just unfair." he comments, you feel your eyes tingling "Now, however, it's up to you to decide what you want to do, how you want to react and live your life. Whether to react by destroying your life or to react and live your life the right way."

"And will you help me?" you ask him looking into his eyes.

"I don't know if I'm the best person for the job, but I'll certainly try," he replies, still stroking your face with his thumbs, while you place your hands on his and kiss him.

You quickly realize you've done something very stupid, he will now pull your face away from his and he will tell you not to do that again, and you will feel even more stupid for having made that gesture.

But, he doesn't push you away; he kisses you back. It's a slow kiss, nothing passionate or overwhelming, it's not impetuous, but it shakes you to the core. His lips are so soft against yours. He doesn't deepen the kiss, he follows your rhythm, and when you open your mouth, he always waits for you to make the next move. Move that is not long in coming. Your tongues started a slow dance, he doesn't overdo, he doesn't do anything beyond the rhythm you are setting. Your breaths mingle and you can't help but think about how you tried to push away the thought of him and instead you came right to him for comfort.

He gently pulls your face away from his, you stay for a while with your eyes closed, forehead to forehead, your breaths crashing against each other's faces, "D' ya regret?" he asks you.

"No. Are you?" you ask him, opening your eyes and looking into his eyes, wanting to know immediately what his thoughts are on the matter.

"No." he answers you right away "I was asking you because I thought you cared about that boy, John." he adds looking you in the eye and moving his hands away from your face.

"Jack." you correct him.

"Whatever" you sigh "So? Do you or don't you care about him?" he asks you.

"Joel, the truth is, I don't know. With him -- I had a good time with him today, I had a wonderful day. We talked, we laughed, we joked, time flew with him and everything was perfect." you see him nodding with a low gaze and his hands on his hips "He's such a good guy" you see him tapping his foot on the ground and hear him breathing deeply "and he asked me to see him again."

"So why did you kiss me and not him?" he asks you point-blank, completely displacing you "If you were so good, then you should have kissed him, not me. Don't you think?" he asks you again.

You nod your head low "Yes, maybe, but ... it didn't feel right, that's it."

"Why did you kiss me? Was it to try to see if you cared about him -- or what?" he asks with a nervous tone.

The truth is you don't know why you did, what you wanted to prove to yourself, what you hoped to understand with this kiss, you never imagined Joel would ask you these questions that you yourself should have been thinking about before and instead, reacting on instinct, you found yourself in a situation that was difficult to understand first for yourself and then for the man in front of you.

"You want the truth, Joel?" he nods "I have been fine with you from almost the very beginning, you opened my eyes on so many things and you are the person who welcomes me and makes me feel at home like no one else, with you I feel strong and protected."

"These words I already know where they lead," he comments, "they always end with a though you are not what I want, from my life I want something else, don't I?"

"Don't compare me to her!" you blurt "If she yelled at you this I can't help it, but don't compare the events nor the people!" you continued raising your voice for perhaps the first time in your life.

"I'm not comparing anyone at all, you're the one who dragged me into this shitty situation," he spits between his teeth, looking at you hard.

"You want me out of your life? Whatever." you explode, turning your back on him and making to go get your coat. At this point better anywhere else than standing there with him, you'll just spew nastiness at each other that maybe you don't even really think about each other.

Before you reach the door, however, Joel grabs you by the wrist with one hand and pins you by the shoulder with the other "I can't let that happen. I'd--" you hear him sigh and then rest his forehead against the back of your head "actually, I don't know what I want either. I want you to be happy, but I'm afraid you could never be happy with someone like me around. You probably, well-- need someone else. And maybe this someone else is Jack himself, maybe," he adds.

"You see, there are two of us who are confused." you say "Maybe we just need to put some distance between us, maybe it will be good for us and help us clear our minds." you propose, but you already know it's gonna be impossible.

"D' you want me to be your music teacher only?" he proposes, loosening his grip from your wrist and shoulder.

"Joel," you turn toward him, "I don't know if we can go back and pretend we're just a teacher and his student. I don't know if I can think of you as just that anymore. The truth is, when I'm with you, I can't think about Jack. You completely erase him."

You are going on a dangerous ground, you know, but you have to be honest. You've always been honest unfortunately, and you have to be honest now more than ever.

"Baby girl, I don't want to make this harder. This kiss was beautiful and--" Joel sighs, he was about to say something but evidently restrained himself "I don’t want things to change or to be complicated because of it; so," he says moving a strand of hair behind your ear, "we're going to try to pretend that nothing ever happened. Good for you?"

You don't want to lose Joel, so it's okay.

It has to be.

Although it means to ignore everything, including the heartbeat when you see him.

"Okay." you find yourself saying, but you're sure your eyes are sad.

"Okay." he says stroking the contour of your face with a finger and then adds after a few moments, "Come back in front of the fireplace so you can warm up a little more. I'll go find you a blanket. Maybe you can sleep on the couch tonight."

You only nod, exchange another long look, and then he goes upstairs disappearing from your sight.

You, on the other hand, go over by the fireplace wondering why you were so weak from kissing him and leading him on only to backtrack immediately, clutching your shoulders and breathing deeply: you saw in his eyes the anger, the disappointment you gave him and that certainly reminded him of something very unpleasant happened a while before.

Tonight you were hurt and you hurt, a worse evening cannot exist.

The next day, a timid light invades the living room of the Miller's home, you find yourself opening your eyes slowly and looking around, on the coffee table there's a small wooden sculpture - the one Joel was carving last night - in the shape of a guitar.

When did he make it?

Didn't he sleep?

You sit up taking off the midnight blue blanket Joel gave you just before he took leave and went upstairs. He treated you courteously, but you felt as if he had already wanted to distance himself from you, and you are really sorry about that. You didn't intend to hurt him or bring to his mind old, painful memories.

You get up and take the small guitar in your hands, then notice a very small note placed underneath the same small guitar, "This is for you."

"Thank you." you whisper, turning between your fingers the small guitar.

Then, you go to the kitchen, you want some coffee, some water, but you don't know if....

You find there another small post-it note posted on the refrigerator, "If you want to drink or eat, help yourself. The bathroom is on the second floor at the far left."

His hospitality makes you feel even more guilty, he's so sweet and you were so mean to him. You wish you hadn't been hit by Jack's sweetness; you wish you had been hit by Joel right away. You sigh and grab a glass, open the refrigerator and see that it's in a terrible condition: there is a bottle of water, a package of eggs and a lemon only. You pour yourself some water, and then you have an idea: you're going to shop for him. Or rather, you're going to help him shop for groceries.

You drink a glass of water and make yourself a cup of coffee. Then, you make one for him, too, and you go upstairs. Up the stairs is a landing area with two side cabinets. On one of the cabinets there is a framed photo of Joel and Tommy.

Once you get upstairs, you immediately notice five rooms: two have the door open, therefore, you see inside them a room full of sculptures, guitars and other paraphernalia whose use you ignore, in another there is a small studio with a desk and a worktop, the other three rooms have the door closed therefore you imagine that one is the bathroom and the other the bedroom, the third you don't know what could be there, maybe another bedroom. On the left there's the bathroom - as he had written to you - and one of the two closed rooms must be Joel's.

Knock. A couple of times, softly.

Then, you hear footsteps and finally the door opens: curly brown messy hair fall on his forehead, his eyes swollen with sleep, he's wearing a white T-shirt and a pair of very short shorts. At that moment you don't feel like you're looking at a forty-seven-year-old man, but a man of at most thirty-nine or forty.

"Good morning." you say unable to take your eyes off of him and the way he showed up at the door.

"Hi." he greets you with a sleepy voice, gives you his back and walks back to the bed sitting down again "You get any sleep?" he asks.

"Yes." you reply staying at the door.

"Come." he tells you and you enter slowly looking around noticing to the right a small walk-in closet, a shoe rack in the corner, a chest of drawers sits underneath a front facing window, with a carving of an eagle, a lamp, a candle, and two photo frames on top depicting Joel and a little girl, but you decide not to dwell on the pictures. In the middle there's a double bed, an armchair, two bedside tables. A small wall shelf has more books, binoculars, and a clock above it.

"D' ya wanna somethin'?" he asks.

"I brought you a coffee. I couldn't find the cup, so I put it in a plastic cup for you," you reply, handing him the coffee.

He looks at your face, then he gives a small smile and takes the small glass in his right hand.

"So smooth." he says, but you doubt he refers to the coffee because there's no record of sugar or sweetener in the house "Sit down." he still continues by resting his hand on the bed and gently patting the mattress inviting you to sit.

You sit at a short distance from him with your head down, not sure if he wants to talk about what happened last night or not.

"What d' ya plan to do now?" he asks you, and you look up at him questioningly "'bout your mother, I mean." he clarifies.

You sigh "I'm disappointed in her, but I can't just cut her out of my life," you reply, looking through the window "I'll have to talk to her sooner or later. I can't let whatever happened just happen. It's not fair," you add.

"So, you leaving now?" he asks you.

You look at him "If you think that's going to get rid of me, it's not!" you reply, smiling back at him "Get dressed, let's go shopping!" you add as you get up of bed.

"Shopping?" he asks confused.

"Yeah, y'know, those things people use to eat." you tease him.

"Witty!" he says shaking his head "I haven't been grocery shopping since..." he's about to answer, but he probably he can't remember exactly.

"I see." you cut short "I'll help you." you add "Come on, bear!" you exclaim teasing him.

"How dare you." he says, but you know he's joking. You know his tone of voice, when he's joking and when he's not.

You stick your tongue out, smiling at him and walking out of his room.

While you are waiting for him, you pick up your phone and notice you received several calls, texts and voice mails from your mother. You don't know if skip it or read and listen her texts, but then you decide not to stiffen up completely: you don't want to become hard and calculating like her.

"Honey, I know you don't want to talk to me. I know you feel betrayed by my attitude and my lies. We always promised each other to tell the truth, but I failed. I haven't had the courage to tell you about Leo and me, I don't know why-- maybe because I know deep down I'm not doing the right thing for me or for you. Leo is married and he will definitely not be the one-- he will never leave his wife, but I can't do this without him, that's the truth." your mother says in a voice mail "I feel guilty with you for two reasons and because I betrayed your trust by not telling you about him, but maybe for you I also betrayed your father. Honey, there is something about him I never had the courage to tell you. I will tell you about it, when that time and the memory hurt less too, I swear. Your father and I loved each other so much, but by now I don't know where he is or if he will ever intend to come back. I wouldn't know where to track him down, otherwise I think our separation would have been made official by now." she continues in a second voice mail "Anyway, I hope you are with someone who loves you and can make you feel protected, maybe someone who doesn't betray you or make you feel betrayed like I did. I love you." concludes the last voice mail, and hearing those words causes an ache in your stomach and a knot in your throat.

Joel appears at your side, you give him a long look, he doesn't say nothing. He doesn't ask you to explain, he doesn't comment, he nods only and squeeze your hand in a gesture of mute understanding.

How could you consider him as your music teacher only?

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athanasius-symposium-of-writings · 3 months

Text

Perversion

@turbulentscrawl triple dog dared me so heres tht thing i wasnt gonna write bvfbfvbihv im so sorry if this ooc lol

Photographer pls why u gotta call him "little gray mouse" pls im not normal now

Rated Explicit | Warnings: none

You never asked for more than what is willingly being given, you are content– Happy with what you have for easily you can have nothing at all. Being with Aesop means not always having the ‘standard’ relationship. Often you are doing most of the work, putting all that you have into this, supportive of this. You usually feel bad thinking you are pressuring the man to stay with you, maybe he thinks he has to out of pity.

Though he will reassure you he never felt pressed to stay, he is willing, and he loves you.

Intimacy, Ada says, is a key part of keeping a relationship stable. Sex is healthy and given the situation of this place and the high stresses, she says sex often can strengthen a bond. You… You like cuddling but sex? It never crossed your mind. It took a while for Aesop to get used to your physical affection, even laying on the same bed as you was awkward at first.

Maybe Dr. Ada is right. Maybe you bring it up… How do you bring this up!? She sympathizes with you before explaining to bring it up naturally.

That is why currently you stand beside the Embalmer as he restocks his embalming supplies.

“Would you have sex with me?” So you suck at naturally bringing up things.

Aesop dropped his bottle.

“Aesop!” You quickly pick up the bottle, luckily it was only one of the makeup bottles, “Are you okay?” Not too much spilled out.

“Are you?” Trying to gather his thoughts, “Why would you ask that?” He thinks something is wrong.

“Yeah, I mean… Dr. Ada said “To strengthen a relationship, sex helps”.”

He blinks a few times, you rely on his eyes to read his expressions as he always wears a mask, “Oh.” He had faced you but he turned back to his supplies, “No.”

“Oh, okay.” You go back to watching him work.

“It is not because of you,” Wording this as best as possible, “I don't like… That.”

“That?”

Aesop is quiet for a second then tries to explain, “It is… Dirty.”

“Dirty as a sin or the process.”

“Yes, no, the process.”

You make an ‘oh’ sound before a laugh, “Okay, nothing wrong with that! I know skin-on-skin contact is hard for you. Heh, I got scared it was because— Huh!?” His gloved hands hold your face, “Aesop.” His mask touches your lips as he kisses you, and you return the kiss.

His forehead is on yours as he speaks gently, “You are beautiful.” His eyes are on your face.

You hum softly, closing your eyes, “Sorry.” Your hands on his shoulders squeezing it as he kisses you again, “May I hold you like this.” Whispering the request. You might have unintentionally had negative thoughts, Dr. Ada warned you a rejection can bring up underlying feelings.

“Of course.”

You do not know what shifted after that day.

Aesop is a sweet lover, he has needs that are different from yours, but he often puts you first. When you need intimate affection like cuddles that require the bed, he gives you that time. But lately, he is trying the skin-on-skin contact in little ways. Kissing more often as his lips rather than the mask, he uses his bare hand to touch your face (one glove on though), and he is one asking for those cuddle times.

“No,” Blocking his kiss with your fan, “Aesop, you don't have to make up for anything.” The single glove on was a sign that something was off. Masklessly kissing you on the lip does happen just not always, he has sensory issues and you respect that. Plus, kissing his mask is cute especially when your rogue marks it.

“I– I am not,” You close the fan with one hand revealing your little frown, “I wanted to touch you… Properly.”

“You can at any time you want, love. But don't force it.”

He leans back nodding as he adjusts his mask back to his face, “May kiss you again?”

You smile before jumping on him a bit to kiss him a dozen times.

Naturally, you expected things to go back to normal, the subject was not brought about sex until much later.

When Joseph became involved.

There is a word for this Joesph said while speaking with you, ‘A ménage à trois’. The word sounds so sweet and smooth like silk from his mouth. Something he says with a hint of something you now realize is seduction.

Maybe the Photographer gave Embalmer this idea for there is no way he came up with this himself. Hell, you never knew they were friends—Ish, they seem to tolerate each other more than others.

As Aesop undresses you, you feel Joseph touch the newly revealed skin as soon the only thing you have on is your underwear.

“Cold?” His voice is low as his finger traces around your shifting nipple. You nod, unable to trust your voice, Aesop's hands hold your waist as Joseph’s lips take the nipple into his mouth, the Photographer's other hand teasing the other. You are grateful to lean against your lover, his mask pressed against your cheek as you quiver. “You will warm up in a moment.” You never realize how pretty the Frenchman looks, most of the time he terrifies you but right now he looks so pretty.

The foreplay is overwhelming, two pairs of hands, one with medical gloves on and the other bare but cold, makes you dizzy.

When you finally are on the bed, writhing as you grip Joseph’s unbound hair as feasts on you between your legs, Aesop removes his mask to kiss you. With every moan stolen by him, you were surprised he wanted to taste you. He tastes like mint, and you taste like that wine Joseph offered prior to this event. Calm the nerves barely.

Something in French is said and you whine as Joseph pulls away. Not for long as slips his cock into your well-prepared heat.

“Look at me.” You fight to keep your eyes open as Aesop holds you, “You are doing so well.” Caressing your cheek.

“They are tighter than I expected.” Joseph says after cursing under his breath, “Relax.” You try but you feel so full. Aesop looks at the way you squirm, his hand moving to your body but unsure where to touch first. “Here, rub lightly.” Joseph guiding Aesop's hand between your legs.

He can't directly feel the sticky substance of your essence but he can feel the warmth, the moan you let out has his cheeks burning brighter than it already is. It is very strange, the texture thick and the substance cloudy.

“Feeling brave enough to taste it, little gray mouse?”

Aesop shakes his head and rather sticks with kissing you.

“Aseop…” You moan out, “Ah.” This is so much yet not enough all at once. “Joseph!” Confused as he grazes something inside of you that has you seeing stars, “There! Please, please!” One hand on Joseph’s arm and the other holding Aesop's hand.

All night you had Joseph inside of you, touching you. All night, Aesop is there exploring you when he feels comfortable and always kissing you. The arrangement is, well, you would not mind doing it again.

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wellgoslowly · 11 months

Note

Hello! I love reading your stories and I was wondering if I could get a request please. It’s for Lockwood and Co. One day, Lockwood stumbled into a small bookstore because it was raining and there he finds the reader (and her dog, a boxer please) who owns the bookstore and they start talking and the reader doesn’t think anything about it (because she talks to all her customers the same way) but Lockwood starts showing up more often at the bookstore to just to talk to her and slowly but surely they start falling for each other. Thank you so much!!!

Bookstore Girl

a/n: this is by far the longest request I've written to date! I'm very proud of it and I'd defo be interested in writing a part two. I also just love me a good bookstore romance so this was super fun to write! i listened to the song bookstore girl by charlie burg a lot while writing this!! also there's quite a bit of tea related discussions and I have never made tea so pls don't scream at me I am simply american and unexperienced.

pairing: lockwood × fem!reader

word count: 3.3k

warnings: none

notices: a character in this oneshot uses neopronouns [ey/em]!! if you don’t know what they are, please check this out- and if you don’t support people who use neopronouns, do not interact. If you comment hate, you will be blocked. neopronoun users are valid and loved on my blog, and I won’t tolerate hate of any kind. if you use neoprouns- know that I love you and you will always have a place in my writing (as a person who goes by they/she/ey)

tags: @ikeasupremacy @oblivious-idiot @givemea-dam-break @tangledinlove @neewtmas @losticaruss @waitingforthesunrise [if yall want to be tagged when I post requests, lmk in the comments! also sorry if I forgot anyone!!]

It was a slow, rainier-than-normal London afternoon when you first met Anthony Lockwood.

“Hi there… Would you happen to have anywhere I could sit and… dry off?” You had been shelving what was left of a new shipment of classics you had just received when you’d heard a distressed patron behind you. “Oh yes, of course.” You said as you turned to face the customer, suppressing a laugh at the sight before you. A handsome figure stood behind you, their dark long coat absolutely dripping as they wrapped it around themselves, trying to salvage some sense of warmth. “We have a cafe in the back, follow me… and try not to drip too much.” You joked, and goddamn, of course the pretty customer had a pretty laugh.

“Apologies, uh… ma'am.” He said, noticing the pronoun pin on the strap of your apron. “I was just walking home and the storm came out of nowhere and one of my roommates broke my umbrella last week… long story.” They explained as you led them to the small cafe situated in the rear of the store. “Would you like anything? Cocoa, Tea?” You offered as they sat down at a small table near the entryway. “Oh, tea would be perfect, thank you.” They spoke, and you couldn’t help but notice the rapier attached to their hip as the sheath scraped gently across the hardwood floor.

“How do you take it?” Nellie, your best friend, business partner, and head barista, asked from behind the counter. “Hm- surprise me. However you take it is fine.” The customer said with a smile. You slipped behind the counter, brushing past Nellie as ey flitted about looking for the secret stash of eir favorite tea that ey always keep hidden, only taking from it on “special occasions”. Nellie winked at you as you slipped into the backroom, looking for the spare blanket you always keep back there for cold winter days. You rolled your eyes and shooed Nellie away, causing em to laugh. Finding the soft reserve blanket, you turned to take it to the sopping wet customer, only to find Nellie blocking your way.

“What are you doing?” Nellie asked, a slightly mischievous glint in eir eyes. “Getting our dripping wet customer a blanket. Why?” You asked, suspicious of Nellie’s train of thought. “He’s nice. Asked me my pronouns and told me he goes by he/him. He’s pretty cute too.” You scoffed. “What does that have to do with anything?” You laughed, causing Nellie to roll eir eyes at you. “You never let anyone use your blanket, not even me.” You laughed again. “Yeah, Nellie, well, you’re never sopping wet when you ask. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must attend to our customer.” You say, brushing past Nellie and ignoring eir laughter as you walked out of the backroom.

When you returned to the main floor, you noticed that the customer was no longer alone. “Bruce, leave the poor guy alone.” You laughed, watching as your dog, a Boxer, jumped up, front paws landing on the customer’s lap as the customer laughed. “It’s not a problem, honestly. He’s quite cute.” You smiled, handing the blanket to the customer, who took it with a soft “thank you” and an appreciative smile.

“I'm glad you think so. Some of our older patrons don't like that we have a dog around, but I could care less.” You say, bending down slightly to pet Bruce on the head as he jumped down from the customer's lap. “Is he yours?” The customer asked as he wrapped the blanket around his body. You nodded, sitting down at a chair opposite the patron.

“Yep. This place, too.” You said with a cheerful smile as Bruce jumped into your lap. “Oh! I had no clue I was in the presence of the owner.” You laughed, scratching behind Bruce's ears. “No, I'm serious, that's really cool. I run my own business too, but it's not… quite like this.” He chuckled, almost to himself, glancing down at the rapier on his hip.

“Wait- you run your own agency?” You asked, intrigued. You had vaguely heard of agents running their own agencies, but you hadn't necessarily believed that someone your age was capable of running something like that. And yet it kind of made sense, taking in his appearance- the long coat, white button down, black tie, and slightly too-tight pants gave the desired effect of making him look slightly older and a bit more authoritative.

He smiled and stuck out his hand. “Anthony Lockwood, of Lockwood & Co, at your service. Most people just call me Lockwood.” You smiled, shaking his hand in turn as Bruce grumpily whined at the loss of your hand. “[Name], of Read Rose Books. Pleasure to meet you, Lockwood. You know, I think I've heard of you. You did the Annabelle Ward Case a while back, right?” He nodded, a sparkle appearing in his eye at your mentioning of hearing of his agency. “Yes, that was us. It's a pleasure to meet you as well, [name].”

“And I'm Nellie.” Nellie had a knack for sneaking up on you at the worst times, and that day was no exception as Nellie had somehow crept up behind you without a sound. ~~The customer~~ Lockwood himself didn't seem to notice Nellie's presence, jumping about 3 feet in the air at eir arrival. Nellie set down Lockwood's tea, and he thanked em before taking a sip.

“Oh my god, this is amazing.” He said, turning to Nellie. “How did you do that? I've never tasted anything like it before.” You could see Nellie beam at Lockwood's praise, and you couldn't help but smile. “Secret recipe” was all Nellie said before ey flounced back behind the counter.

Lockwood chuckled, taking another sip. “George- one of my housemates, would love em. He's really into cooking too- makes all sorts of elaborate meals that always taste amazing.” You chuckled, looking back at Nellie. “Even I don't know what Nellie puts in there- ey've never told me.”

“If there's anyone who could get the recipe out of Nellie, it's George. He's an insanely good cook, and he loves tea more than the average person.” You both laughed softly before Lockwood spoke up again.

“Speaking of George, do you have a phone I could use to call home? Just to tell my housemates where I am.” “Oh, of course! Follow me.” With a distressed whine from Bruce, who had to depart from your lap, you got up off you chair and led a blanket-clad Lockwood over to the front desk, where your store phone was located. “Thank you so much, I should be quick.” He said, picking the phone up. “Don't worry about it, take as much time as you need.” You assured him. “I'll be right over there stocking some classics if you need me.” He nodded, and you walked back to where you had been dutifully stocking the beautiful new editions of Pride and Prejudice, making a mental note to leave one aside to purchase later for your own personal collection.

You were still within earshot, so you could hear most of the conversation that Lockwood was having (not that you were purposefully eavesdropping, of course- it was very quiet in the store so it was very hard to try and not hear his conversation. You did try, though.) Lockwood's conversation started with a “Hi George, I wanted to let you know that I'm ok-” before Lockwood was promptly cut off by a loud voice shouting at him, causing Lockwood to jump and have to hold the phone away from his ear for a moment.

“Hello to you too, Luce. Look, I'm fine- I got caught in the storm and *someone* broke my umbrella on that case last week so I had to seek shelter before it got too bad. Don't worry- I'm at that bookstore in town… The one George has been wanting to check out? Read Rose? The staff has been very nice and helped me to warm back up but I'm not sure when I'll be able to come home with how the storm is going.” A moment of silence followed as someone- Lucy, you assumed- spoke to Lockwood. The quiet was broken only by the sound of books being pushed into their respective slots on the shelves.

“No, no, Lucy, you are not coming to get me. I don't care if you broke my umbrella, I won't allow you to walk over here in the rain- Lucy? Lucy?!” And then Lockwood let out a frustrated sigh and put the phone back down on the receiver. You looked back up at him, stifling a laugh at his exasperated expression. “I guess one of my housemates is coming to retrieve me.” He laughed, running a hand through his still-wet hair as he looked outside at the still raging storm. “From what I could hear, they sound very stubborn.” He chuckled. “Oh, she is. Lucy is insanely stubborn, believe me.” You laughed, liking the picture you were putting together in your head of this Lucy already. “To be fair, something tells me you're fairly stubborn yourself.” You chuckled. Lockwood gasped, putting a hand to his heart. “You wound me.” He said, and you both fell in to laughter.

Your laughs subsided after a moment, and you fell into a comfortable silence as you stocked and Lockwood walked around, perusing the aisles of books. You two stayed like that for a couple of minutes, and you had never been more content to just be quiet with someone before. “Now I understand why George has been bugging me to visit here for so long. We haven't had much time- cases have been piling up so George is either at home or at the Archives most of the time these days.” You nodded in understanding as he took a book off a shelf near you and examined the cover.

“I get it. Not the agency work- I don't have any Talents. The stress, I mean. My grandmother owned this place and passed it down to me when she passed. Every day there's something new to take care of or a new problem that comes up.” You laughed as you put the last book on the shelf. Lockwood laughed as well. “I know exactly what you mean. You love it though, don't you?” He asked, turning to you. He smiled as your eyes met his, and you gave him a smile in return. “Yeah,” You said softly. “I really do.”

He grinned, and was opening his mouth to say something when there was a sudden noise at the door, and then there was a borderline soaked girl holding an umbrella standing breathless in the doorway. This must be Lucy, you thought to yourself. She was obviously righteously pissed, her hair dripping as she tried desperately to control the bangs that were matted to her forehead. “Lockwood, you idiot.” She said, shoving the umbrella at Lockwood and turning to face you. She sent a look Lockwood's way, which you translated to say something like “who is this?”. Lockwood smiled.

“Lucy, this is [name], owner of Read Rose Books. She and her friend Nellie have been very welcoming and helped me to get warm. [Name], this is my associate, Lucy Carlyle.” Lucy rolled her eyes, elbowing Lockwood in the ribs and whispering something like “you can just introduce me as your friend, you dickhead” before she turned her attention to you, smiled, and stuck out her hand for you to shake. You did, softly saying “nice to meet you”, as did Lucy. “Thank you for taking care of this one.” Lucy said after your handshake had ended, pointing to Lockwood. You laughed. “It was no problem at all, really.”

Lockwood moved to return the blanket you you, but you refused. “You need it more than I do. Just make sure to return it whenever you can, ok?” He smiled appreciatively, nodding in understanding before Lucy grabbed him by the arm ans hauled him to the door. “Thank you again!” Lockwood yelled at the same time Lucy said “Have a nice night!”, and then they were out the door and the shop was silent again.

Nellie was there within seconds, pressing a warm cup of cocoa into your hand. “I'm never getting that blanket back, am I?” You asked em softly. “Probably not, no.” Ey agreed.

---

It was a week until you saw Anthony Lockwood again.

It was sunny outside this time, and you had a pretty nice crowd going inside the small Read Rose venue. You were just finishing up a customer's transaction, barely had the words “have a good one” out of your mouth, when you saw him enter the store. He had on the same outfit, but his hair was more styled, in a totally not attractive way. He was entering the shop with someone who you didn't recognize. They were slightly shorter, with brown skin and curly dark hair and glasses.

You noticed the second that Lockwood found you, watching his eyes light up and a smile form on his face as he waved. You waved back and returned the smile when you saw what Lockwood was carrying in his left hand.

“I was thinking I'd never see that blanket again.” You joked as Lockwood and his companion walked up to the front counter. Lockwood chuckled. “I see how little faith you have in me.” He spoke as he passed the blanket over to you. “Well, she's not exactly unfounded. Remember that time I leant you a sweatshirt and I didn't get it back for a month?” You laughed as you placed the folded blanket on a shelf beneath the counter, not seeing Lockwood sharply elbow his companion in the ribs.

“Anyways, [Name], this is my best friend and business associate, George Karim. He's the one I told you about that's really good at cooking. ” You reached out your hand for George to shake, but he ignored it and turned to examine your store. Within seconds, he was walking away to an aisle that had caught his eye, leaving you behind with Lockwood as you yelled out a rushed, “it was nice to meet you!”

Lockwood smiled apologetically. “Don't mind him. He's au- he can be a bit brash, but he's a good guy, once you get to know him.” You smiled back as you waved your hand in a dismissing manner. “Don't worry about it. I hope I do. Get to know him, that is. Lockwood & Co. seems like a very fun bunch.”

All Lockwood could do was smile before George returned, informing you that they would be back soon but they had a case that night that they had to prepare for. You nodded in understanding. “I'll look forward to your next visit. Be safe out there.” One last dazzling smile from Lockwood and he was gone, being borderline pushed outside by George as you laughed.

---

It went on like that for weeks- at least once a week, Anthony Lockwood would wander into your shop, only once or twice actually buying a book. You got to know each other fairly well- you learned that he hated sugar in his tea, that he always wore pink socks, that he didn't always wear suits, and that he started wearing [favorite color] ties whenever he came to visit after you told him it was your favorite color.

You learned that his favorite genres were classics and mystery (and that he had a bit of an obsession with gossip magazines). Often times, he would come in right before closing a couple times a week and sit and read with you to pass the time before you closed and walked you to your flat a block away.

Every time this happened, Nellie would leave work a half an hour before you and give you a set of totally non-subtle winks before flitting off into the sunset. Lockwood never seemed to notice eir suggestive winks, and if he did, he never appeared too flustered.

Nellie would corner you every morning after, grilling you for every detail. “Why do you even care?” You would say, laughing as you unlocked the storefront. “Because a super hot guy is obviously falling for my best friend!” Ey would exclaim, and you would roll your eyes and laugh it away, making sure to change the subject while you tried not to dwell on the possibility that Nellie was right.

---

“Well, well, well, if it isn't my favorite bookseller. Do you ever take a day off?” You laughed from your perch on one of the bookshelf ladders, looking down to see Lockwood standing below you, a smile on his face and his hands on his hips. You laughed. “Hi, Lockwood. To what do I owe the pleasure?” You bent over, grabbing a book to put up on the top shelf.

“I was sent by George to search for a book he was looking for.” Came the reply, not an uncommon excuse. You turned to reach for another book to stock, but you realized that Lockwood was holding out a book for you. “Thank you.” You said softly, and he looked up from the synopsis of a book in his hand to smile at you. “Of course. It seems you're a bit of a workaholic- I'd love to help in any way I can.” You laughed as you shelved the book.

“You're one to talk. Pretty much every time you come in here you've got that getup on and intense bags under your eyes.” You joked as you descended the ladder, taking the empty box from Lockwood's hands.

“Well, one needs to be a little bit obsessed to lead a top agency, don't they?” He asked, following you to the cafe. Nellie brightened as ey saw Lockwood trailing after you, calling out and asking if Lockwood wanted anything. “Yes, please, Nellie. Could you by any chance make your secret recipe tea to go? I really need to get going, but I was in the area and I just wanted to stop by.” Nellie smiled. “Aye aye, captain.” Ey said before they started the tea making process.

“I thought you came in to look for a book for George.” You said, turning to him with an eyebrow raised and a smile on your face. You giggled as you watched Lockwood flush. “Ah, yes, well, you see-” He was so caught up in his mumbling that he didn't realize that Nellie had appeared next to him, a bag in eir hand. “Jesus, Nellie.” Lockwood jumped, and Nellie chuckled. “Not Jesus- people do often get us confused.” Nellie joked before pushing the bag in front of him.

“What's this?” Lockwood asked, cocking a brow. "A gift for you, George and Lucy. For being such great patrons.” Lockwood smiled. “You really don't have to-” Lockwood started to speak, but Nellie interrupted him. “I insist.” Ey said before turning and running away before Lockwood could fight anymore.

Lockwood turned to you and scoffed. You chuckled. “Ey really like making baked goods for people.” You explained. Lockwood smiled, and the two of you lapsed into a comforting silence, taking in the slow crowd that filled in and out of Read Rose Books.

After a moment, Lockwood broke the silence. “Are you- would you be amenable to visiting Portland Row tonight?” His question caught you off guard, but you smiled nonetheless. “I could be convinced. Why? What's in Portland Row?” You asked, turning to look at him. He smiled softly, a soft flush dusting his cheeks. “Lockwood & Co. We just finished a pretty big successful case so we're throwing a small get together at the house, if you wanted to come?” He asked, and you could sense the nerves radiating off of him. You smiled, nudging his shoulder as you turned to face away from him, trying to draw attention away from the blush that was slowly spreading across your face.

“I'd love to.”

eeeek thank you so much for reading!! pls leave feedback, it truly makes my day :) also if you want to request or see my other works, my masterlist is linked in my about me post which is pinned :)

I love you all so much, remember to stay hydrated, and I hope yall have an amazing day!!! mwah

xoxo linnie <3

184 notes · View notes

joelslegalwhre · 1 year

Text

Softy on the inside

Even if i’m “just reposting” this for the new main… again, thanks sm for your request @f1-hoff 🤎

paring⁀➷ dad!august walker x (fem!)mom!reader

word count ⁀➷ 1.1k

summary ⁀➷ up in the ask

warnings ⁀➷ soft!august (for his family only), swearing, kinda questionable morals, kissing, fluff

a/n ⁀➷ (tell me if I missed a warning pls!) soft!august but only for his family?? yes pleasee! Thanks for the request love!

You knew who August Walker was, better than anyone. What he had in mind. And yet, you couldn't feel anything but love for him.

You didn't support his actions, and he was well aware of it. But you knew that you couldn't stop him if he wanted something. You were just like him when it came to being stubborn.

August may have had some very questionable morals and worldviews, but when he was with you, nothing of that mattered. He was the most loving, caring and respectful man you have ever met.

The moment he laid his eyes on you, August knew you were his one in a million, his future wife and the mother of his children.

And now, almost four years later, that's exactly what you were. His wife, the love of his life, and the mother of his son.

Your phone rang in your pocket, and you fished it out of your jeans. „Hi Walker." you teased him, using his, your, last name. A game you loved to play. „Hey, Y/N.” he teased you back using your full name.

"Dad, dadda!" your son excitedly babbled, seated on your hip.

He could sense his daddy from a mile.

You giggled and nudged his nose with yours.

„Hey mister." August grinned at the other end of the phone. The two have had a special bond ever since they first looked at each other the day your baby was born. That day, in the small hospital room with just the three of you, August's eyes changed. Into the ones of a father, one that would do anything, literally anything, to keep his family safe.

Changing to a more serious tone, you asked,

„ls everything okay?".

"I'm good, baby. Uhm, I just forgot the other phone at home.." his voice lowered at the last part of his sentence. „Could you maybe bring it? Just if that's fitting for you, I don't wanna boss you around, peaches."

„Don't worry, where are you right now?" you asked while looking for the phone.

Finding it laying on the dresser, just as he described, you put it in your pocket.

„I'll send you the address. I love you, peaches." August softly said.

„I love you." you returned with a smile.

"Let's bring Daddy his phone, shall we?" you smiled at the little man on your arm. He smiled up at you, his eyes - which looked just like your own - shining with joy. You chuckled and kissed his hairline.

August was heading for the safe house in London and you knew he needed the phone, he wouldn't have called you if it wasn't truly important. And you knew it was safe, August would never risk having you, nor your child, in danger.

You were just going to combine this with a visit to the playground, a win-win situation, since August would have his phone and you could go on a swing with your little man and maybe even wear him out, so he'd be fast asleep for his nap time.

The address August sent you wasn't far away. Pushing the stroller in front of you, you had a glance at your phone from time to time, just to make sure you were walking in the right direction. „Dada!" your eyes followed the direction of the little hand pointing at his daddy. August must've heard it, because he did the same. A smile crept up his face as he saw the two of you, and you waved a hand as you returned his smile.

He was still standing a few meters away from you when you stopped. There was no need to get any closer to the group he was standing with.

The name to which August reacted seemed to draw the attention of his bystanders. A woman turned around to look at you, and you gave her a small smile, which she returned.

„Who's that?" One of them asked as he watched the interaction between you and your husband. „None of your business, Hunt." August spat out with a look that could kill, clearly showing that he couldn't stand the man in front of him one bit.

He made his way to you with heavy steps, anyone else would run if a man his size came towards them like he did, but his gaze softened with every step he took until he finally stood in front of you.

„Hi handsome." you smiled up at him as you handed August his phone.

„Hey peaches," he put it in his suit pocket, kissing your cheek, „Thank you.".

„Be careful please." Your smile was now replaced with worry. August nodded, and a smile crept up at the corner of his lips, his large hand at your chin tilting your head slightly up to look at him „I promise." he said in a low voice.

August kissed the top of your nose, and you closed your eyes at his loving gesture, while the group he left behind couldn't believe their eyes at August Walker's sudden change. It was as if he was someone else. Instead of the cold and often rude behaviour, he seemed loving and protective.

August bent down to your son, who was still in his stroller, looking up at his parents. „Hey little man," August grinned at him, „Take care of mommy until I'm back, alright?"

With bright eyes, your mini me shook his head yes and babbled some incomprehensible words at his dad. August tousled through his dark hair with a smile.

"Don't go anywhere until I'm back." he looked back at you with a hint of concern in his eyes. He tried to hide it, but you could see right through it. „Promise" you smiled. August bent down a little to connect your lips with his. Your eyes shut close, savoring the moment and the scent radiating from him.

His lips were soft, and you quickly opened yours for him. August didn't waste another second and deepened the kiss, cupping your face with his strong hands. Yours were already wrapped around his neck, lightly tugging at his hair. A soft moan escaped your lips as he gently bit your lip. August planted one more kiss on your lips before his hands wandered down to your hips, pulling you even closer.

„I love you, peaches." he whispered. „I love you too." Your arms wrapped around his torso, your head nuzzling into his muscular chest. August's hands wandered up your back, and he just held you close for some time.

„Now, aren't you going to introduce us to your lady and the little Walker?" Hunt asked him once August returned to them.

„No." was all he coldly said, the August they all knew being back.

༄ Don't copy, translate or republish any of my works on any app or other platform please. I only post my work on Tumblr and Wattpad.

Reposts are always appreciated, they really make my day🧡

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two-white-butterflies · 2 years

Text

coaxed you into paradise

Chapter Thirteen: Driftmark Description: Saera Targaryen was her father's forgotten daughter. Years following her marriage with Ser Harwin Strong, she catches him in an affair with her sister and seeks solace in the arms of her uncle. Not realizing that the consequence of their affair is just as dire as her sister's.

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THE COURT WAS AWKWARD, everyone's gazes remained fixed upon Rhaenyra and her children. Almost sure that they were bastards simply by their hair and eye color. They did not look like Targaryens or Velaryons. Instead — they looked more like the late Ser Harwin.

"The crown will hear your petition now, Lord Vaemond." Queen Alicent states as she keeps her hands in front of her — showing everyone her signature 'i-want-to-die-face', her lips remained pouted and she offers a glance to her father.

Saera watches as the situation unfolds, allowing herself to gaze upon the descend of her older sister. "My brother is in critical condition, and I am his closest male relative." he announces to everyone, offering an accusatory stare at The Strong Sons.

Rhaenyra laughs at his statement, placing a hand on Lucerys' head. "You must be mistaken, Lord Vaemond. Because Prince Lucerys is Laenor's true-born son." she dispersed with her eyes glaring at the man. Queen Alicent clears her throat, and looks down upon the princess.

"You will have a chance to share your grievances, my princess." she replied bitterly showing everyone at court that the Queen is not easily shot down. Vaemond smiles, and looks back at the throne.

"As I was saying, my queen." he started once more but the doors opened behind him. A footman clears his throat and announces the arrival of The King.

Rhaenyra looks back at her father, watching as he walked towards her. A soft smile playing at her lips. Saera watches as he trembled towards the throne — the seat that has wounded him.

His crown falls unto the floor, and Daemon takes a step forward. Picking up the crown, and placing it atop his brother's head. His wife smiles, fully reminded that they were family. And in spite of Rhaenyra's betrayal, she still had to support her.

King Viserys sits down, and uses his cane to stabilize himself. "I must admit my confusion, I do not understand, why petitions are being heard over a settled succession." he confesses as Saera offers The Green a scary glare.

It was the Hightowers who planned this. They planned a diversion in order to plant seeds of doubts about The Velaryon's legitimacy. Viserys looks at his cousin, and clears his throat.

"The only one present who might offer us a keener insight to Lord Corlys' will, is his wife. Princess Rhaenys." he pointed towards the silver-haired woman, and she takes a step forward.

Saera wasn't the only one who was given a preposition. The Queen That Never Was, pauses allowing the court to be intrigued with what she was about to say. "Indeed, your grace. It was ever my husband's will that Driftmark would pass through Ser Laenor and through his son, Prince Lucerys. His mind never changed, nor did my support for him." she cleared up as Alicent shifts uncomfortably.

Perhaps, the Hightowers assumed that there was no unity between the Targaryens. But they were wrong again.

Rhaenys smiles, and looks at Baela. "As a matter of fact, the Princess Rhaenyra has just informed me of her desire to marry her son, Prince Luce to my granddaughter, Princess Baela. A proposal, to which I heartily agree." she informs as Viserys smiles contentedly.

He attempts to stand up, and looks upon his subjects. But Vaemond takes a step forward, halting all the words from his lips. Viserys' raises his eyebrows (if he still had them.) and Vaemond laughs bitterly.

"You break law, and tradition to install your daughter as heir. And you're telling me that it is them, who stands to inherit Driftmark." he points his fingers at the children. He laughs once more, finding irony in the situation.

"I will not allow it! No!" he yells as he plays with the sword on his hands. Daemon places his hand on the Dark Sister, prepared for a fight.

Viserys stands tall, a weak groan releasing from his mouth. "Do not forget yourself, Lord Vaemond." he commands as the man takes a step towards Rhaenyra.

"That, is no true Velaryon. And certainly no nephew of mine," he claims loudly as The King raises his arms in anger.

"You have said enough!" he argues as Vaemond stares at Saera. She was the one that knew. The one that could prove that Lucerys and his siblings were charlatans, pretenders who deserved no titles.

He smiles mischievously, "Why don't you tell them, Princess Saera?" he offers she slightly pales. She wasn't expecting being put on the spot, she looks towards her sister.

She was at the edge of two crossroads now. One road led through revenge and satisfaction, while the other was duty and love for her family. Her lips thinned, and her eyes dulled.

Duty was her choice, as it always will.

"I will not offer my father's court lies, Lord Vaemond." she settles as Viserys hums, dismissing all other opinions. "Then it is settled, Prince Lucerys stands to inherit Driftmark." he announces as he motions for everyone to be dispensed.

Saera looks at Daemon's eyes, her lilac orbs asking if she made the right choice. He nods at her, and places a kiss on the back of her hand. Comforting and recharging her courage.

ALYSSA LAYS HER HEAD IN AEMOND'S LAP, his company was comforting — at least more comforting than those of Aegon. He places a hand on the grass in front of them, plucking it destructively.

She looks up at him, but his eyes remained pasted unto the ground. "They contemplate about my cousin's legitimacy. But what do you think?" she questioned as he smirks.

"They contemplate your brother's legitimacy." he corrected as she knitted her eyebrows. Surely, he didn't believe the rumors to be correct. "I hardly believe that," she replied defending her brother's best-friends, and also her late father's honor.

She couldn't remember her childhood, but it was filled with joy. "My father never cheated on my mother. He was faithful and chaste." she corrected as a chuckle exalted from his lips.

"You remember the past, very differently." he mocks as he remembers the times when his nephew's legitimacy had come into question — more times than he can count.

"I remember it clearly, Aemond." she defended herself as another chuckle comes out of his lips. "Just look at them, Isa. Their eyes and hair are brown," he pauses as she sits up from his lap.

She crosses her arms and huffs. He shouldn't disrespect the memory of her father like that. "My father's hair and eyes were brown too — but look at me and my brother." she reasoned as he lays on the grass.

"Your mother's blood is strong, and The Seven knows those who have been faithful." he answered as she laid down beside him. Cringing at all the dirt that have began to stick to her gown.

"That's untrue." she shot him down and he chuckles in return. The Sevens save such porcelain doll. "The truth will always prevail." he answered in a sing-song voice as he rolled over to stand up.

next chapter>>

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halsteadlover · 2 years

Text

Pure Fear

*Gif not mine credits to the owner*

• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader.

• Requested by anon: Hi hun! A little bird read to me that you are accepting requests for our handsome man Jay? 💆🏻‍♀️ Could I request a Jay Halstead x reader (his girlfriend) where she is stuck in a bank with the robbers and he tries to control his emotions while deeply caring for her trying to take her out as soon as he can with the team? Thank you ❤️

• Warnings: mention of blood, gunshot, death.

• Word count: 5860.

• A/N: guess who's back again after more than a month with a this piece of shit? Yeah exactly, me. I'm sorry for this turned out and just know everything it's pure fantasy so if something doesn't make any sense just let it slide 💀 anyway, I hope you'll like this, please like, comment, reblog. Thank you so much for everything and for your support ❤️ If you want, please consider to support me on Ko-Fi too. Love you all xx

Everything seemed normal.

Each person went on with their lives normally, completing the various chores they had to do. There were those who had to buy groceries, those who had to go to work, those who were late for an appointment, those who took their children to play in the park. In short, there seemed to be nothing different from the usual, nothing that could cause concern.

You thought it would be a day like any other. And that’s how it started.

That morning you said goodbye to your boyfriend Jay before he went to work, agreeing you’d meet him – as usual – at lunch. Neither of you imagined what would happen. After all, life was so unpredictable.

Neither of you had certainly foreseen there would be a robbery in the exact same bank you were supposed to go to, neither had foreseen that two hooded men would come in and shoot, ordering everyone to get on their knees and keep their hands behind their heads.

Pure fear. Pure terror. This was what you were feeling at the time, moments when your whole life passed before your eyes as the robbers paced back and forth in the bank. You kept praying with every fiber of your being, you tried to stay positive, and your mind at that moment turned to Jay.

My Jay.

You kept praying and hoping to see him break into that bank but you didn’t even know if he knew about the robbery. You couldn’t stop thinking about what was going to happen and the very thought of never seeing him again, not seeing your family, your friends, made you feel so sick and in that moment you wished so much you’d told them how much you loved them, how much they were important to you.

It was so true that life was always taken for granted.

“Give us all your phones! Now!” one of the two robbers exclaimed as soon as they forced you to stay on your knees. The silence was broken by the cries and sighs of everyone present, the screams of the robbers and their threats to kill you instantly if someone did something they shouldn’t have.

And like this they confiscated all your phones, taking away the hope of being able to secretly ask for help. They had tied up the manager, asked for all the money they could take with them.

You kept taking deep breaths, thinking and rethinking Jay’s words from a conversation you had few months ago.

He was working on a hostage robbery case and you were sitting next to him on the sofa, watching the way he was focused.

“What should we do in these situations?” you asked, just out of pure curiosity, never imagining finding yourself in a similar situation.

“Do whatever the robbers say, don’t try to be a hero. The key is to negotiate, establish a relationship, make them believe you want to help them and you’re on their side. The main goal is always to save as many hostages as possible so you have to get them to trust you, that to get what they want they must also offer something in return. We always try to start with women and children and finally men, but in the meantime we still try to find an intervention strategy, we study the place well, all the available entrances, possible break-in plans, for example whether to do it silently or take them by surprise,” he explained, turning to you and giggling when he noticed your expression between shock and surprise. “These situations require calm and coolness, let’s say these are moments of very high tension”.

“Wow, that’s pretty bad, I can’t even imagine what it would be like to be in this situation, I hope I’ll never have to find out.”

Jay set the case file down on the coffee table and pulled you close, stamping a kiss on your temple. “I don’t even want to imagine this, I don’t know what I could do, I’d probably die”.

And that was exactly how Jay felt when he found out about the robbery. He felt he was dying.

As for you, the morning was going on normally for him too. For some strange reason no murder case had come up and he truly believed that for a very rare time he’d even be able to get home soon. But when he saw Sergeant Platt walking up the Intelligence stairs with an expression on her face that was anything but happy, he knew that state of peace was about to end.

He had no idea what was actually going on.

“There’s a robbery taking place in the Chase Bank, there are at least two attackers with about fifteen hostages” Platt had announced but Jay’s mind had stopped only at the opening words.

Chase Bank.

It couldn’t be true, it couldn’t be happening.

It was the bank you were supposed to go to that morning.

Jay immediately took his cell phone from his pocket and typed your number with fury. His heart was pounding as he prayed you’d answer your phone, he’d hear your voice saying you were still at home, that you were fine. But as your number directed him directly to the voice mail, a sign your cell phone was probably turned off, Jay could no longer maintain control and the more seconds passed the more he felt being swallowed more and more in a chasm.

“Please answer baby… Please, please, please, pick up the phone…” he kept muttering to himself as he kept calling your number over and over, but without receiving any kind of response.

“Jay what’s going on?” Kim asked, noticing the way Jay was worried but he didn’t even seem to hear her. Without waiting for the rest of the team, he immediately rushed down the stairs, aiming to make his way to the bank as soon as possible.

Jay felt like he was dying and never before he felt so disoriented and disoriented, so out of control. He continually tried to call you, to no avail as the call was always going out.

Surrounding the bank were Intelligence, the negotiating team, SWAT, and nearly the entire Chicago police department. The situation was difficult, the tension almost cut with a knife as each agent present tried to work out a strategy to get the hostages out safely and arrest the criminals.

But Jay wasn’t focused, he kept thinking about the possibility you were in there and the thought of not knowing was eating him alive. The thought of knowing you were at the mercy of the robbers, frightened and disoriented, that he was so few meters away from you and couldn’t help you was making him so sick, so helpless. It might have been a selfish thought, but right now he didn’t want to do anything but save you, get you out of that damn bank and hug you.

“We managed to get into the bank’s surveillance system, we have live images of what’s going on inside,” announced one of the IT experts and as Jay looked at the PC screen, his heart was pounding, continuing to hope with every fiber of his being that, by some miracle, you weren’t in the bank that morning. But as soon as he saw you with the other hostages, on your knees with your back turned to the entrance, every bit of hope vanished in the blink of an eye and every worst nightmare turned out to be the harsh reality.

“Fuck!” he exclaimed aloud, kicking a chair that was next to him, seized by despair and anger. He ran his hands over his face, frustrated, enraged and in a throes of emotions. He even decided to go into the bank, wanting to get you out of there at all costs.

“Halstead!” Voight exclaimed when he saw him walking towards the bank, rushing to him and, with Kevin, taking him by his arms in an attempt to calm him down.

“Jay calm down man!” Kevin kept repeating to him but without any success and although he and Voight were both holding him back, doing so turned out to be quite difficult.

“Leave me fucking alone! My girlfriend is in there for fuck’s sake!” Jay kept struggling, trying to escape from Voight and Kevin’s grasp.

“I know kid but that’s not how you’re going to help her! You need to calm down!” Voight spoke.

“Calm down? How can you even tell me to calm down?! My fucking girlfriend is in there with those two crazy sons of a bitch! I need to get in there!”

“Jay! Listen to me! You know how these things work, we need to make contact with those robbers. Breaking in now could only result in mass killing! You know this” Kevin continued immediately after “I know it’s hard to stay here, but this is the only chance we have to get everyone out without injuries, we have to work as if it were any other case.”

Those words, instead of trying to calm Jay down, on the contrary, infuriated him even more. “Don’t fucking tell me to work like this was any other damn case! This is my fucking girlfriend we’re talking about, it will never be any other case!”

Jay walked away from them, not even waiting for an answer. He was aware of it, he knew the only way to get you out of that bank safe and sound was to be patient, to have faith in the work of all the agents present, but at that moment he couldn’t, he couldn’t think of anything other than you.

When Voight approached Jay after some time, he saw him leaning against a police car not far from everyone. He had his back to the rest of the crowd and Voight knew this was just Jay’s way of trying to calm down.

“Jay”.

“What do you want? Isn’t it enough for you to waste my time while my girlfriend is locked in there?!” Jay snapped, not even looking at Voight .

“I know how you feel, god knows how I would’ve reacted if someone so important to me was in this situation,” Voight spoke “But we need you for this but, above all, she needs you right now. I know her, I know she is a strong woman and she’ll be able to keep it cool even in these difficult times, but she’ll need you when she comes out of there, she needs to know you’re lucid enough to help her. Do you think you can do it kid?”

Jay sighed, running his hands over his face as he pondered Voight’s words. He knew he was right, he knew he had to try to be as impartial as possible so he could do his job and save you but he didn’t know how, he didn’t know how to be impartial when it came to you.

The sound of one of the bank telephones ringing broke the silence, making you jump. You turned your head slightly, watching the robbers pacing back and forth out of the corner of your eyes, as if they didn’t know what to do.

“Don’t answer that damn phone!” shouted one of the two robbers, the one a little more lucid and controlled.

“You should answer instead,” you intervened fearfully, turning your head slightly to look at the two men.

“Did I say you can fucking talk?!” the robber yelled, rushing towards you and pointing his gun at you. You almost had a heart attack and you wished you’d never opened your mouth as you turned back to the wall.

“No, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, it’s just that… It will be the police and there will definitely be the negotiation team and this is your chance to ask whatever you want, no one will say no” you murmured, dry lips and throat, staring down.

“What makes you think they will help us?” asked the second robber, the most intimidated one, and you knew it was him you had to focus on trying to get him to do the right thing.

“Because they don’t want anyone to get hurt,” you replied, trying to turn back to them but returning to your original position when the first yelled at you again. “Well… What I mean is that you have the opportunity to ask for what you want, a car, plane tickets, fake passports, you can escape and nobody will try to catch you, nobody has to get hurt, I’m sure this is not what you want”.

There was a moment of silence when you prayed to God that neither of them would shoot you and you wished you had never spoken.

“She might be right,” the second robber replied in a low voice, looking at his partner “We have no chance to escape, we are completely surrounded.”

“Fuck!” exclaimed the other, the one who must have been the leader of the duo, frustrated. “Fine, but if anyone tries to make a single fucking move, I’ll kill all of you am I clear?!”

Jay was watching - along with the rest of the team - everything that was going on inside the bank, how the robbers were panicking, how you tried to get them to answer the phone, how that son of a bitch had pointed the gun at you, how you visibly trembled when you felt the gun pointed at your head but nevertheless you tried to convince them to do the right thing.

He kept yelling internally to shut up, to just say nothing. He thought about how brave you were, how much he loved you for it, but at the same time how stupid you were for risking your life like that. He knew, however, you’d try everything before giving up.

His heart stopped a thousand times when he saw the robber point the gun at your head. What would he have given to find himself in your place, how much he would’ve wanted to hold and hug you after seeing you so visibly trembling and afraid, how much he would’ve wanted to tell you he was so proud of you for your courage.

When one of the bank phones started ringing, your heart leapt in your chest, your stomach twisted with anxiety as you hoped one of the robbers would answer. As you might have guessed, they had applied for a vehicle and fake passports to escape with, obviously without omitting the threat they would blow someone’s head if there was something wrong that didn’t go according to plan.

“We will try to do everything we can to provide what you have asked but we also need proof of your willingness to cooperate, that you want to do the right thing” a gruff voice spoke that you acknowledged belonged to Sergeant Voight.

My Jay had to be there too.

Baby, please let us all get out of here, you continued to pray internally, trying to repress the instinct to cry and to be hopeful and positive about the success of the operation.

The two robbers looked at each other, as if they were consulting each other about what to do.

“We can get someone out,” muttered one of them, clearly the submissive one.

“I’m not letting anyone out of here until we have the car and passports!” the other robber exclaimed, not giving the slightest consideration of his partner, and making everyone jump with fear.

“Listen to me carefully,” Voight replied “Unfortunately this is not up to me, these requests follow chains that I cannot outclass and especially for false passports you have to wait a bit, but my bosses could do something to speed up the process if they saw your willingness to let someone go. At least let the women go.”

Jay’s heart was pounding in his chest as he watched the surveillance camera videos from the monitors and he didn’t care how selfish and horrible it might sound but in those moments he hardly even cared what was going on, the robbers would do. They could even run away, never reappear again and he’d let them go just to get you back safe and sound in front, he just wanted to see you walk through the doors of that damned bank, he just wanted to hold you like he had never done.

There were moments of pause, of silence, in which no one in the bank spoke or dared to breathe. Jay kept gazing at the way the robber looked at the hostages, a sign he was pondering Voight’s words and deciding who to possibly let out.

“Ladies, stand up,” the robber ordered. “Turn to us with your hands up. Slowly, and don’t you even think do something stupid or I’ll blow your brains out, am I understood?” he continued, his gun pointed at them as the ladies stood shaking.

If Jay could've described what he was feeling right now in one word, he would’ve used fear. Pure, paralyzing and devastating fear.

You were visibly trembling, your breathing quickened and your heart beating wildly. It was about to end, it soon would be over, you were about to come out of there.

“Take the ladies to the exit,” the leader of the duo ordered. You all started walking but the following words of that man made your blood run cold in your veins “Not you. You’ll stay here sweetie.”

What?

You prayed with every cell in your body he didn’t refer to you but when you looked up and saw his eyes aimed directly at yours, his gun pointed at you, you understood it was you whom he spoke to.

“Why?” you almost whispered.

“Because I say so and now sit back with the others before I’ll kill you!” he exclaimed aloud making you jump with fright.

God, this will never end.

“Fuck!” Jay screamed and in anger kicked again a chair right next to him. He couldn’t believe it, he was just one step away from finally have you back again.

What did they have in mind? Why had the robber held you back?

“Jay calm down man, she’ll be alright” Adam tried to calm him down, but failed miserably.

“Don’t fucking tell me to calm down! What the fuck are we gonna do now? Huh? And don’t tell me to sit back and wait because like hell I’m gonna leave my girlfriend in there with those bastards!”

The robbers had given an ultimatum. They had said if their requests were not granted, they’d kill a hostage every hour.

You kept praying they were just bluffing, that it was just a gimmick of theirs to lure the cops and everyone out there to speed up the operation, but fuck it wasn’t.

They really did.

There was blood everywhere.

Splatters on everyone, even on your face, on your clothes.

You touched your face with trembling fingers and felt dying to see them stained with blood.

They really did it.

They had killed a man.

And now he lay there helpless in front of you, his lifeless body with a gunshot to his forehead in full execution style.

And like this they had taken the life of a man, without remorse, without any pity or second thoughts.

The ‘submissive’ accomplice was almost as shocked as the rest of you, not expecting his partner would actually have the guts to pull the trigger. He understood it was over for the two of them, they were doomed and, since they were now also responsible for a cold-blooded murder, they’d never see the light again.

You knew everything was coming to an end and the more time passed – praying with every cell of your body to see Jay break into that bank sooner or later – and the more the hope of getting out of there alive became smaller and smaller.

Jay was on the verge of losing his mind and trying to hold him back became more and more difficult every second that passed. He just couldn’t sit while you were still hostage to those robbers and now, given the ultimatum they had set, Voight literally had to hold him back by force to prevent him from further worsening the situation.

And Jay, rationally, knew it. He knew if he had intervened he would’ve done nothing but endanger your life and all the others present, that this would’ve ended in nothing but a bloodbath, beyond the blood of the poor man already dead.

“Halstead I need to know for sure you can do your job now because we’re running out of time,” Voight was stating to Jay, a hand on his shoulder as he looked at him in the eye. Jay took a deep breath, but initially remained silent.

Could he really do his job? Could he risk hurting you, even if unintentionally?

“Halstead?”

“Yes, I can do it”.

Voight nodded with a satisfied and proud expression. “Go get ready then, I want you on the roof in 5 minutes.”

Cold sweat dripped from Jay’s forehead, his hand steady on his trigger, ready to fire, his reflexes alarmed, his eyes on the sights.

He tried not to think about the rest, not to think about you crying incessantly, desperate. He tried not to think about how by now this horrible event would’ve traumatized you, how it had been for you to see a man coldly killed in front of your eyes, how afraid you were and how much he would’ve wanted to let you know he was there, that he’d save you, that soon you’d be safe in his arms.

“I’m waiting for orders,” Jay had spoken into the transceiver.

“As soon as you have a clear shot, no other hostage will have to die today,” Voight replied and Jay got the message.

Shoot to kill.

The hour was up and the robber was choosing the next person inevitably destined to die.

You almost had a heart attack and you felt your stomach tighten as you saw his glassy, empty, soulless eyes staring into yours. You cried even more, seeing for an instant your life pass you before his eyes.

God Jay please, where are you?

“You know I haven’t been a real gentleman before, usually I’m always the knight and let the ladies pass first, I hope you’ll forgive my rude gesture,” the robber said in a sinister tone of voice, a smirk on his lips, as if all this amused him “To redeem me the next one to die will be you, sweetness.”

Your survival instincts got the better of you and, even if foolishly and in vain, you tried to escape.

But, of course, this was a complete fiasco.

The robber – now also a murderer – had grabbed you by your hair before you could even try to run away and the kicks and punches you tried to throw at him were not enough, his grip was so strong and firm that it was useless.

“Halstead are you there?” Voight asked through the transceiver, aware that Jay was seeing the same scenes they were seeing too.

Jay didn’t answer right away.

He was furious, so damn angry and so fucking scared. He had never been so scared, not even when he was being bombed overseas while he was at war.

“Jay”.

He was shaking, couldn’t keep his hand steady enough to make a clean shot. He didn’t have a good view as the robber was holding you in his arms and Jay couldn’t possibly risk hurting you.

“I can’t shoot goddamn it,” Jay swore.

“Time is running out sergeant,” the man grinned while on the phone with Voight, still holding the gun to your temple “And still none of the things we requested are here, you know what that means.”

“You know that this is not how you’ll get what you want right?”

“I don’t care, you haven’t listened to me, maybe a little reminder can be useful to you”.

Taking advantage of that exchange of words between Voight and the criminal, you took the opportunity to elbow him in the stomach with all the strength you had in your body. The blow was such that he loosened his arm around your neck and you took the opportunity to escape him and try to hide.

It all happened in a second.

A shot echoed throughout the bank, leaving everyone stuck and petrified in their places, breathless. For a thousandth of a second you thought you were dying, that you’d been shot and your thoughts immediately went to Jay, to the love of your life, to the fact you’d never see him again.

For a moment everything around you stopped, your ears were ringing, your vision blurred, everything seemed to go in slow motion.

Am I dying?

But you didn’t realize it.

You didn’t realize it wasn’t you who was shot but the robber who threatened to take your life away. Not even when you saw his lifeless body slumped on the floor and with a hole in his head you realized it.

Not a single muscle in your body was spared from the twitching and shaking, and as you saw all the police officers enter the bank, immediately arrest the accomplice and rescue the other hostages, you could hardly believe that it was all over, that you survived.

“Y/N, hey” you heard Adam’s voice bring you back to reality but it sounded so low and distant at that moment. You looked around while your eyes tried to study what was going on, as if to make sure it was just reality and not an nightmare.

“Let me help you, come on,” he continued, approaching you and helping you to stand up. Your legs felt like they were made of jelly, so much you could hardly even stand up and if it wasn’t for Adam, you’d probably fall on the ground again.

“Can you walk?”

You nodded. “I want Jay,” you whispered faintly. Damn it, even your voice was still shaking.

“He’s here, he’s coming to you.”

And that was exactly what Jay was doing. His heart nearly stopped beating after he shot the robber but before he knew it, he had already got up and ran off the roof at lightning speed, leaving even the rifle he had used there.

He lost the number with how many people he collided with trying to run to the bank but he didn’t even care, he just wanted to hug you. He looked around immediately when he walked in and when he finally saw you next to Adam, he almost started to cry.

You were fine. You were alive and well.

“Y/N!”

Your head immediately turned to that voice, a voice you would’ve recognized even in the midst of a million. Never before it brought you so much joy and happiness to hear his voice and it was at the precise moment when your eyes met his, so green and bright, you finally felt really safe.

He held you like he had never done before, squeezing you so hard you almost felt your bones break. But you didn’t care, as he hugged you, you could hardly believe it was really happening, that you had another chance. Your arms encircled his neck as you inhaled his scent deeply, his arms instead encircled your hips with so much force they’d most likely leave a mark.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” he asked frenziedly in his voice, pulling away from you for a moment and glancing at your body to see if there were any obvious injuries.

“I’m fine… I’m fine…” you replied even if your trembling said something else. Jay hugged you again and at that moment you didn’t even notice that Adam had walked away, leaving you two alone.

“Oh baby,” he whispered “It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s all over now, I’m here with you.”

You started crying again, nonstop, as if those words from Jay had flipped a switch inside you.

“Cry as long as you want my love I won’t leave you, I’m here with you and it’s all over, you’re safe with me,” he tried to calm you down, stroking your back with his hand as he squeezed you tightly to his chest. The truth was that Jay had no idea how he was still standing, the truth was that if you weren’t so shaken, you probably would've felt how shaky he was too. He couldn’t believe he had you there, that you were safe and sound and soon he even couldn’t hold back the tears anymore.

But he didn’t want to be seen weak, crying with joy, with fear, not in that moment, especially because you needed him then more then ever, he had to be strong for you.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t come sooner my love, I’ll never forgive myself.”

You kept sobbing, sniffling from time to time because of the desperate crying that had taken over you. You wanted to talk so badly, tell him it wasn’t his fault, that he didn’t have to feel guilty but you just couldn’t.

“Let’s get out of here, can you walk baby?” Jay asked you in a sweet, gentle tone after an indefinite time. He pulled away from you slightly and took your face in his hands. His thumbs caressed the skin of your cheeks, wiping away the tears so sweetly, if you hadn’t already cried all the tears in your body, you’d most likely have burst into tears again.

You sniffed and nodded, wanting nothing more than to get as far away from that damn bank as possible. “Yes, please”.

“You’re still shaking baby,” his heart bleeding out “It’ll be okay love I promise, I’ll always be next to you and we’ll get through this together, you are not alone okay?”

You nodded again and you believed him, you knew you could count on him and this was perhaps the only thing that could cheer you up during a time when you were afraid of the whole world.

For the rest of the day Jay didn’t leave you for even a second, constantly asking you how were you feeling, if you needed something. You were still very upset but thanks to him you had at least stopped shaking as if you were convulsing.

That event was not something you would’ve easily overcome, quite the opposite. The fear of dying, seeing that man die in front of you, the kidnapper, all that blood, god, these were things you’d never be able to forget.

You and Jay were in your bedroom, lying under the covers as he hugged and cuddled you, in an effort to help you close your eyes and sleep, at least for a little while.

But of course it was in vain. You couldn’t sleep, not after all that had happened.

Absolute silence reigned in the room, neither of yp spoke, there was no need. It was an almost deafening silence and never like then you hated it because you felt like you were about to drown in your own thoughts but, at the same time, you couldn’t even say a word, you didn’t know what to say and in the same way Jay.

He found himself in a phase in which perhaps only then he began to fully realize what had happened, that he had really risked losing you, never seeing you again, not staying on your bed like you were doing, hugging each other.

Jay held you tighter in his arms, as if that thought had physically hurt him and as if he was trying to push it away.

“I love you to death, you know that right?” it was Jay who broke the silence “You are my life, the most important to me baby”.

His words warmed your heart, making your lips rise to the first spontaneous little smile of that damned day. “I love you too baby, so damn much”.

“I’m serious Y/N,” Jay let you go for a few seconds and then immediately put his hand on your chin, causing you to look at him “I want you to know that, I love you so fucking much. I’m not joking and I’m not exaggerating when I tell you I couldn’t live without you” he continued, then gently stroking your cheek as he looked you in the eye with so much devotion and love you almost fainted.

“You know, ever since we’ve been together I’ve always had the fucking fear of losing you, given the work I do, I’ve always been afraid you might leave me but today it was something devastating. I swear baby I can’t even explain how I felt when I heard about the robbery, knowing you were there, I think I died and rose a thousand times within a minute,” he talked, literally heart in his throat as he remembered those horrible moments “I was so afraid, the terror of losing you… It’s a feeling I never want to relive again and I know it sounds selfish of me to say these things now since you were in there and you first experienced this horror, but really baby, it felt like a fucking knife was cutting me in pieces. And I’m also so sorry I didn’t came earlier, I swear I would’ve broken down the door by myself just to come get you but they literally had to hold me back with force”.

You giggled through your tears, only then realizing you started crying again. “I know you would baby and that was the only thought that made me resist honestly, I knew you would walk in that door and save us all,” you said “I was so afraid I’d never see you again baby…” you weren’t able to finish the sentence since you broke is sobs again. Jay hugged you against his chest again, whispering soft words as his hand caressed your hair.

“I hate so much it was you who went through all this, I’ll never be able to forgive myself, it wasn’t supposed to be you.”

“But it wasn’t your fault…”

Jay was silent.

You looked up at him and noticed how his eyes were fixed, aimed at the ceiling. Only then you noticed the tear that slipped from his eye and you realized he was avoiding your gaze because he was crying.

“Oh baby…” you muttered under your breath, lifting your hand and wiping his tears with your fingers, exactly as he had done with you all day.

“I’m sorry love, you shouldn’t be the one comforting me now” He chuckled, trying to ease the tension a little, finally looking into your eyes.

Jay rested his forehead on yours as his fingers gently stroked your cheeks. You brought your face close to his, kissing him on the lips but before you could even break away from him, Jay placed his hand behind your head, pressing his mouth to yours again, kissing you this time with much more intensity, with so much love and passion it felt like years had passed since your last kiss and just like this you finally felt at home, safe in his arms like never before.

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