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neo-shitty · 3 years

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toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

#toff.asks #wild anon 🐺

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laketaj24 · 5 years

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Friends IV: Muses and Couches

Author’s Note: Heyy!! Back with the update. Brace yourself. Petty is coming. Taglist open. Requests open! Let me know what you think!!! And thank you for participating in the pols last night and earlier this week!! It was fun as hell to see the little Fairies stake their claim. This one is for you.

Warnings: SMUTTTTTT!!! TWICE.

Friends I, Friends II, Friends III Vikings MASTERLIST

The two weeks blurred before your eyes. Ivar was furious but with school back in session and a girlfriend there was not time to talk to you, let alone bitch to his brothers, who had already betrayed him. You took it as the ultimate win. He would never fight Bjorn. Bjorn would win unless Ivar didn’t fight fair, he liked Hvitserk, even though he was an ass to him. So, you had won this round of the game and you were a spoiled victor.

But perhaps the game wasn’t over. You sat with Ubbe, Torvi and Hvitserk at Astrid’s. The small café was packed tonight. Sigurd was doing a secret show Kattegat. The younger Lothbrok had made a mark on the world with his first debut, AXED and ever since then he had been renowned for his music, especially his guitar skills. He was a force in the industry.

You never really spent time with him, Ivar wasn’t his biggest fan and the others never paid their small feud attention, but you did. It was all you heard when you were younger and perhaps it was a sign that your next move should be him. It actually had to be him.

You were the red dress with your beige fuck me heels. No one every said no to them, Sigurd wouldn’t either.

“Are you gonna do it?” Torvi whispered next to you. She was such a little instigator and you hated to admit it, you loved it. “He is looking nice up there, the tour done him some good.”

You laughed. “I actually think it would be a good idea to fuck him as a final goodbye to Ivar you know. Fuck his hated brother and let him and the demon have their spawn.” You twiddled with your straw. “Do you think it’s a good idea?”

“I think it is an amazing idea. And then we can move you onto a good guy, like Alfred.” She leaned in to whisper in your ear. “he is really interested in you, he likes you.”

“Little Alfred?” You questioned. “He’s younger than me?”

“So, he’s a good guy. Trust me they are rare.”

“Is that why we keyed your ex’s car that night?”

“He punched Ivar over it, it was a win/win.” She added. “You should have seen his face, he was so confused. It was perfect. Now, after this set take your sexy ass up there to Sigurd, work that freaky magic and get the dick! And remember receipts.”

“Get whose dick?” Ubbe leaned over being nosey.

“That’s all you heard out of the whole conversation.” She griped and placed a playful kiss on his lips. “Watch your brother kill this set.”

The show went on for another forty-five minutes and you took Torvi’s advice and waited for him on the side of the stage, like a groupie but at least he fucking knew who you were. His tatted hands and arms came to alarm you, Sigurd had changed a little, it was fitting.

His face lit up when he seen you on the side of the stage, his green eyes actually looked happy. “Y/N, fuck it’s been forever! I didn’t even know you were still around here.” His arms wrap around your body and he’s genuine as he rocks a few times with you and steps back. “How’d you like the show?”

“It was phenomenal, I didn’t know you could play like that.”

“Yeah.” He paused. “I know you remember Ivar talking about my music lessons.”

“Fuck him.” You spat. “I think he was jealous.”

“Likely.” Sigurd smiled. “You wanna talk for a second. I have to go back on in an hour or so, there is no point in talking to my brothers, they’re infatuated with Torvi.”

“Yes! That would be awesome. Where to?”

“She has a room set up for me back here. I would love to tell you about the tour if you wanna hear. It’s just so good to see a face I’m familiar with.” He opened the side door and you walked in after him and took a seat on the brown couch. The room smelled of jasmine. Astrid was all about essential oils.

“So, tell me about the tour. Did you enjoy yourself?”

“Yes, it was amazing. I went to some places that blew my mind. People know me now. It’s weird.” Sigurd takes his seat next to you and his arm brushes against yours. You weren’t too far from him, and you couldn’t take your eyes off his hands. It must genetics. They were riddled with tats but there was no doubt in your mind the thick fingers could work some magic.

“What are your muses?” You asked clearing your throat. You clenched your legs together, were you starting to enjoy this game a little too much?

“Pretty woman like yourself.” He blushed.

“Like me?” You sat back on the couch and uncrossed your legs. “Ivar didn’t think so.”

“He wouldn’t, he’s a child.”

“And you’re a man?”

“I like to think so.”

“Want to prove it, I can be your muse.” You whisper as you turn to him. His face is inches from yours and all you can think about is the way his lips will feel on yours.

“Are you not Ivar’s?”

“I belong to myself and no one, Ivar has a woman.”

He chuckles. “It would have made it sweeter if you were his…” He whispered under his breath as his lips touch you and the kiss deepens.

“We could make it sweeter for the both of us.” You slide your phone out of your purse and lift your eyebrow at him. “If you want to?”

“Yeah cut that thing on.” Sigurd laughs and he kisses you and pulls you into his lap. Maybe it’s nature but you rub yourself against him and feel his cock through the jeans. “Are you sure about this?”

“Positive.”

Everything moves quick. You unbuckle his pants and pull his cock out. You were impressed as you stroke him from tip to hilt and pull aside the red panties. He had magical fingers, maybe the guitar was playing so beautifully because of the way they worked. Sigurd fingers work your swollen clit like it had never been worked before, he kneaded and touched in just the right places that you came before you could even get him inside you. There were no complaints as he took his fingers from you and pushed into you with parted lips and eyes locked on yours. He was different from his hungry brothers. He was gentle. He fucked you slow,. He moaned each time you winded your hips on him and every time you heard him the melodic moans nearly sent you overboard.

You nip at his ear and he sucks air through his teeth. “You fuck me so well Sigurd.” You praise.

And it was just what he needed to get a untamed pace and start fucking into you with a vengeance, or a vendetta. He flipped you onto the couch and fucked you hard and deep until you forgot where you were even at. It doesn’t take long to cum beneath him and him to follow after. He rested on you and your hands sifted through his hair.

“This was worth it.” He laughed.

“I think so.” You smile.

“But don’t send it to him, please?” he sighed. “As much as that fucking twat gets on my nerves, I think he might go a little mad.”

“I won’t.” you assure him. “I swear it.”

You sent the video. He saw it, read it. Not one word.

You sit in the restaurant with Hvitserk on your right and Sigurd on your left. It wasn’t even awkward as the brother talked and carried on with Ubbe and Torvi about what games they were going to this soccer season or not. Your mind was on the lack of response from Ivar. He responded with Hvitserk and Bjorn but not Sigurd.

“That’s it, you have to come with Ubbe and I to the cabin!” Torvi finished her beer and then grabbed another slice of pizza. “Right Ubbe.”

“I don’t see why not.”

“Then that’s that! Yes! Girl’s trip plus Ubbe.”

Your eyes are hooked on the door. It was fucking Ivar. Why was he back in Kattegat? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. “I have to go pee or something.” You push against Hvitserk, but it is too late as he makes his way to the table. “Fuck.”

“Y/N, brothers.” He glared at Sigurd and then you. If looks could kill you would have been on the floor, closed casket.

“I didn’t know you were in town Ivar.” Ubbe looked confused.

“Urgent matters came up.” He shoved his hands in his pocket. “But I am here now, can I join?”

“You don’t have to ask.” Hvitserk laughed. “Come on, finally us four are back together again.”

“Yeah, rare.” Ivar’s eyes narrowed. “How is the tour Sigurd? Fucking everything that can walk?”

Sigurd laughed. “No, the tour is stressful actually.” Sigurd had no idea you had sent the video. But he was starting to figure it out because Ivar was being uncomfortable with his glares and stares.

“Good for you.” He stares at you. “Well, I have to be going. Y/N can I have a word. I won’t take you away from your toys too long.”

Hvitserk looked up. “Don’t be rude.”

“Fuck you and fuck off, Hvitserk.” He waited at the door for you. He had a smile on his face. A part of you wanted to run the other way, while the other wanted to see what the fuck he wanted. You reach him. “Having Fun?”

“Yeah, I like this restaurant.”

“Don’t you fucking condescend me.” He growled through his pearly whites. “I will talk with you later.”

“No, you won’t. Go home to Angel, or demon tits.” You step back before he can reach your arms. “And Sigurd plays the pussy just as well as he plays the guitar.” You grinned. “I love your family baby.”

Four in the morning came fast, you head to your apartment with Ubbe walking you to the door. “Thank you Ubbe, I got it from here.” You laugh as he lazily leans on the wall. He was worn out. “Get some rest.”

“Night.” He said heading down the steps.

You stumble into your home kicking off the heels and tossing the jacket to the ground. You just wanted your bed. A hand clasps over your mouth muting the scream.

“I told you I would see you later.” Ivar lifts you from the ground and your legs flail. “You think you are funny, fucking my brothers like I wouldn’t teach you a lesson. You are still mine.” He drops you to the ground places you against the wall. Everything in you wanted to bolt out of the door but his heavy frame made it impossible to pass.

“Get out of my house!” You yelled.

“I will go nowhere. I got over Hvitserk.” He paused. “I got hit by Bjorn, but I cannot stand for Sigurd. That little pompous shit is not worthy.”

“And you are? You lied to me. You got another girl pregnant.”

“We were not together!”

“But you promised!!” you hear your voice. “You said it was me, me forever! And then her, you just met her Ivar. You just met her and fucked her like it was nothing. I never meant anything to you did I? Did I!”

“You are everything!” He roared. “And now I have to watch you be some used slut for my brothers! I will not allow it!”

“Better a used slut than a godmother.” You gathered enough strength to push him out the way. “Get the fuck out of my house! Now. Go back to you just add water, instant family and get the fuck out!!”

“I told you that was not how I wanted things to happen. I wanted to be with you! I told you this!”

“But your actions, Ivar, they are not on your side. You lied to me.” You try to hold back they tears. “I don’t want to have this conversation with you.”

“We are talking all of this out, right now. You think I like seeing you fuck my brothers.”

“I don’t care.”

Ivar invades your space. His hands cup your face and everything about him in this moment is soft. His eyes, his face. He strokes your face and leans in and he kisses you. You fight the urges to punch him in his face and allow yourself to fall victim to the way he touched you. Every spark triggered memories, every moan made you weaker. You place your hands on the wall and he looks down at you. “Tell me you care.” He breathed.

“I don’t.” You add.

“You lie.” His nose softly drags across your jawline and Ivar’s lips press onto yours. “Tell me the truth.”

“I don’t.”

You blink and he’s flipped your around on the wall, his big hands grip your ass and a groan escapes. “You lie to me? Hmmm? You fucked my brothers and you think I am not supposed to care.” He pushes his hands beneath the hem of the dress, and you suck in air. “We can fix this. Who can fuck you better than me?”

“I’m not doing this.” But you were. Your body have given in to Ivar the moment he appeared in your apartment. This fucking bastard was good at bending your will. You don’t protest once he slides the dress over your head or throws you over his shoulder too the couch. The same ouch you’d almost fucked Hvitserk on a few weeks back. Guilt tings you a bit as he starts to spread kisses all over your body. Leaving a small trace of him with each kiss. “Ivar.”

He looks down at you as he throws his shirt to the floor and reveals the tattoos. You were toast. Fucking dead to the world. “What?” he smiled.

Your mouth was dry and perhaps you now understand why people associated thirst with lust, you wanted to drink every bit of him. Fuck his girlfriend. This man was supposed to be yours. “Nothing.”

“Exactly.” He pressed his hand to your throat as he slams into you. This was a fucking punishment.

Your body tenses and a squeal escapes, you’re unsure if it’s in pleasure or pain but he continues to fuck you. His hands get tighter and you gasp for air.

“Short of words?” He snarled. Ivar pushes into you again. “Who can fuck you better than me?” Ivar asked.

Your not able to speak but your body answers, you twitch as your legs are in a frenzied state below him kicking and gripping him to go harder, faster.

“Hmm!” He yells. “Not Bjorn.” His hips snapped onto yours. “Not Hvitserk.” And again. “Especially not that backstabbing cunt Sigurd.” Again and again until you feel the dam break in you. Emotions, fucking tears and your body shook. “Yes, answer me! Who!” You can’t answer as your body ripples into one orgasm and then another. “No one. No words huh. He lifts his hand and you take a big gulp of air only for it to be taken as he continues to fuck you senseless.

Minutes pass and his phone vibrates everyone of them. “Answer it.’ You breathe on top of him.

Ivar answers with a sigh. “Hey, Angel.” Pause, you hoped he couldn’t hear your heart beating erratically. “I will be home tomorrow morning. Yes, mom is okay.”

So he lied to get to you. You shake your head and stand up from the couch. It didn’t seem like a task to collect his clothes from the floor and throw them at him. You take your dress and walk into the kitchen. You wished he would get the fuck out and let you wallow in your sorrow. The call ends and you make your way back into the living room with your hands planted firmly on your hips. “Go.”

“I’m leaving.” He smiled. He stood up and started to dress. “I will never forgive you for fucking my brothers. I hope you know that.”

“I don’t give a fuck.” You lied. “Get out.”

“Gladly.” He says still shirtless but leaving.

He leaves and you climb in the bed, it’s soaked with tears, but you find sleep. It was all you wanted anyhow. The morning, or afternoon comes quickly, and your peace is ruined by the never-ending raps on the door.

“Y/N! Open up!” It was Sigurd.

You barely dress tossing on the first shirt you see and open the door. “Sig?”

“Did you send him the tape?”

“Uhm, why?”

“Because it’s fucking leaked all over the internet!!!” He yelled.

Taglist: @ivarsshieldmadien @equalstrashflavoredtrash @whenimaunicorn @akamaiden @siren-queen03 @titty-teetee @sparklemichele @wilddrabble @imgoldielikehawn @greennightspider @tomarisela @scumyeol @raindrop-dewdrop @naaladareia @vikingsmania @readsalot73 @oddsnendsfanfics @amour-quinn @wheredidallthedreamersgo @unsure-but-trying @lisinfleur @ceridwenofwales @leaderradiante @microsmacrosandneedles @valynsia @captstefanbrandt @therealcalicali @lol-haha-joke @b-j-d @cinnabearice @tephi101 @grungyblonde @ivarslittlebadgirll @igetcarriedawaywithyou @honestsycrets @sunnyfortomorrow @earthsmightiestasses @sincerelysinister @dangerousvikings @queen-see-ya-in-valhalla @tgrrose @tierneygonzalez @ivaraddict @alicedopey @brownsugerhippy @purplerain85 @quaint-and-curious-being @doloreschanal @ilvebeenabad @strangunddurm @dangerous-like-a-loaded-pistol @pebblesz892 @young-ugly-god @blackspiritshake @starrmoondaisy @trailerthoughtstexas @booyouwhore @athroatfullofglass @riottkatt @honeyofthegods @funmadnessandbadassvikings @jennadoll19-blog @khiraeth @geekandbooknerd @innerpaperexpertcloud @rabeccablake @savismith @boo-youwhoreee

#vikings #laketaj24 #ubbe #ivar the boneless #laketa j writes #ivars heathen army #hvitserk #ivar lothrbok #ivar #sigurd #sigurd x reader #ivar x reader

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survivor-kuwait · 4 years

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Episode 12 - “MADISON IS THE CANCER THAT NEEDS TO BE CUT OUT” - Ian

I had a 3 hour long call with Corey to debrief me on all the alliances he has been apart of getting made, the "Mighty Kids" meal or whatever they are calling themselves and the "Gayish" alliance, Corey, Madison, Kait, Thomas and Devon then Trace, Matt Corey and Madison respectively. I love the information share. Corey is really buying what Madison is selling and that is quite obvious to me, that's a battle for another day, the first battle is getting Matt out to open the game up. Corey told me that Madison really want's Timmy out next round but we discussed that it would not be ideal given the circumstances of numbers/alliances and our true game desires. We need people that will vote against Matt, Again thank you Matt for working with me even though you're not for saying Corey is a threat. Check your game buddy. The current plan is to take out Trace next round, bleed Matt, then take out Matt the next round. Ideally we make both these moves happen without burning any of our advantages but if we have to we will. Trace burned me for Matt, he has to go.

---

What I need to do is get all the "untouchables" working together, Maynor, Timmy, Cullan, and Chips. The people that aren't in those alliances that Corey told me about. The problem is how to go about it organically without blow back on Corey for me knowing that this group of people are who others have written off as a boot list.

Stephen going was sad but he was totally rude to Chips. Like idk. But it looks like im good standing right now. Theres an alliance with me Kait Matt Timmy and Owen. Which is great and Ian wants to work with me as well. Corey wants to watch each others backs. I feel like i can make it far just need to be really smart. Timmy and I working together is so great since our other 2 games we killed each other. This challenge is going alright. Its not that bad. Ive beat level one.

MADISON IS THE CANCER THAT NEEDS TO BE CUT OUT, ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN THIS TRIBE GOES THROUGH HER. EVERYONE BOUGHT WHAT SHE WAS SELLING. I'm about to fully embrace that every vote Madison gets this season is going to be mine, the Topaz idol is switched back to be wanting to be used on her instead of Matt

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Cullan killed that flash game. Props to him. I on the other had sucked but i finished one though. This tribal has been very quiet. Owen mentioned that the names were Thomas and Chips. Like Thomas likes me so i know it sucks but i would rather have Chips go. Gunna play it by ear tho.

My name is being thrown out because I have been inactive. Well sorry for having a job, going to school, and having a social life, I wish I could be just like them looollll

Supposedly the alliance of 6 is doing Trace, them plus me is 7 and it's a done deal. I'm a bit nervous long term about doing this move because it's really counting on Corey to pull through with the Bull and the Lion long term and will be on board to eat the Mighty Kids meal fuck all alliance after we get Matt out. Seriously if we can pull off the two player swing of voting off Trace and Matt, the people I've coined as the untouchables/undesirables could nab some power in the game. Again that heavily requires Corey to be ready to fly by the seat of his chair and eat the six. If he's not, then I'm sure Devon will be itching to do a move by then. Devon, my KS guy, don't fail me when I'll need you the most.

I have a lot of feelings and it's been a while since I confessed I feel. So Stephen voted Thomas because I told him to so I feel happy about that because he wanted to vote Owen or Matt and I said he wouldn't be able to get motion with those so do Thomas. Moving into today's vote. I wish Cullan didn't win immunity because I would love to vote him out...we don't click so he can go. I had heard Chips and Thomas which works for me bc I'm not working with them but now apparently Trace is throwing out Owen's name and I'm like wtf because I asked Trace what he has heard and he made no mention of this so I guess we're not close like I thought we were. Either way I'm sticking with my alliance on this one because they are the people I truly trust so let's make some waves.

It looks like the move now is to do Trace. Timmy and I are conflicted because we really like Trace but he could be a liability for us because he throws a name for some people and a different name to others. And people in our I miss Borders booksellers want to do Trace right now. Hopefully it works out for Timmy and I.

Everything went well last round, 12-1-1 which was almost expected EXCEPT I got a vote!!! Honestly I’m not completely convinced it was Trace.... idk. It seems bold of him to do. I figure either he did it in case Stephen had an idol, OR someone else did it to pin on trace or something. Either way I don’t care, I really turned that vote into a good thing because it gave me an excuse to talk to others about targeting trace hehe :) bye bye! No more hot guys on my island! Ew that was gross of me this Island is actually kait’s hehe. Ummm I rlly love her so much we bitched about everyone last night. It’s hard that her and I have all these allies that in the long run will go after each other but for now we are making t work. Hopefully trace goes tonight and then next round I’ll rllt have to deal with corey targeting matt. Speaking of, I do really love corey and I came into this with every intention of working with him as my number one, but it’s hard when he made other allies oremerge . He’s protecting Cullan and Ian? Neither of which I need in this game. And Kait just has been honest with me about stuff I feel Idk. I feel like her and I are more on the save wavelength than corey and I . But as long as I can keep them both here the better. I did tell Kait some stuff corey said not to tell her lmao including Cullan being after her.... oop idk. As wary as I am about my connection with matt, I did tell him about the idol and I did trust him with this trace vote. I think it’s going well with him but I rlly don’t want to go to the end with him and Kait kinda does eeeej. Madison I love but she tried to get Timmy out this round hehe rightfully so. Timmy has been SO GOOD TO ME!!!! I love him. And of course Maynor is still a bae too omg. I’m liking the people in this game more and more and I know it’ll get stressful but for now things might be looking up. It really looks like I’m getting exactly what is best for me two rounds in a row.... Can’t wait for something to go wrong!!!

This vote is the most nerve racking one yet. I essentially have to give up on my toeing the line and finally choose a side, and naturally I am choosing to side with my Survivor Wife Kait whomst I love. I like Trace a lot and the Queer Eye alliance with him Corey and Madison is cute, but like it’s time to frickin play and get rid of the threats in this game instead of letting life pass my by. That being said it’s quite insane that I must keep saving Thomas’s inactive ass! Kait is really adamant on keeping him but it’s frustrating sticking your neck out for someone who won’t so much as have a conversation to save themselves. I’m hoping to move forward with the Trio of Kait and Owen and myself, who currently have three advantages which is making me cackle! Let’s hope this vote rocks the boat in my favor or else I can see myself getting absolutely shafted once everyone compares notes and realizes I’m playing both sides.

Hi yes I choose violence. Sorry Trace. You have to go in order for me to get Matt out. I feel bad bc I genuinely did want to go far with him but it seems his alliances turned sour for my game! It should be 9-4 tonight, if everything goes to plan. Catch you on the flip side!

Today has been a pretty straight forward day. Now that I don’t have immunity I am a little nervous about the vote, but I am confident in the relationships that I have developed. I have been pushing Thomas since the beginning of the day. I think chips trusts me, and I don’t want to send him home quite yet. Everyone seems to be on the same page, so it looks like my work paid off. Let’s fucking move on tho and have another challenge I can actually win!

So this is pivotal for me. I really want Thomas out of this game. I don’t teust him and I do not feel like the game can progress worhba u comfort with him in it. Converse to that though my alliance would like to vote trace. However I have been informed that trace has made an alliance group with Matt Madison and Corey. Which obviously am not a fan of. So tonight is a tough choice.

Assuming I do not get voted out tonight I will formally sit down and write what is going on in the game. I just have been busy this weekend so I apologize. The game picked up and stuff just as my school year was ending. As of this moment what I know is that the vote is between me and Thomas with the players leaning to Thomas. I was told Thomas was the dummy vote by Kait and Matt who want to work with me and not make an "easy" vote this round just because and want to vote Trace. I'm for it even though I've only gotten positive vibes from Trace simply because it would appear to make my time in the game longer. If I'm the possible vote this round via debate that means I AM the vote next time. Well I guess we will see.

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okay so allegedly trace is leaving tonight, a move i'm quite happy with. trace mentioned owen's name last round and we all think that he's the one that threw the vote on owen last tribal. oh! and he mentioned tommy's name too so i have to protect my fellow scorpio fam. i got mad at corey today bc of all this shit that he's telling owen like cullan wanting me out but him talking him out of it apparently, and not telling me. it's just all this shit that;s building this massive amount of distrust for him. but for tonight we just have to bank on him i guess. i don't like it, but i'm not certain where to start with taking down his empire. our group with maynor, matt, and timmy is a good place to start. i'm beginning to think that's the truest shit i've got going for me. i don't know of anyone timmy is super close to other than like us, so i'm thinking we're his closest, or at least that's what he told me. IDK. i'm trying to think straight with tribal coming up but im just so damn nervous. i'm worried that someone told cullan who told trace, or someone told trace straight up and they've been plotting to get me or owen. i'd HOPE with how woven into people we are that we'd find out about it, but that's just a hope. manifesting that we will be okay and that cullan will leave next!

Ep 12 BYE BYE GEMINI! jk I feel kinda bad, and I honestly really wanted Timmy gone, but it is what it is. Another vote that’s not me is a win at this point.

#survivorstarzone #episodes

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pinksweatergettingbetter · 7 years

Text

aight

lets ends this

i love that he's still trying to cheer her up with her terrible crossover idea

phoenix is such a sweetie

“...so we may put this dead lawyer walking out of his misery”

hear hear

just kill me already

“she's now slain two high level clergymen...”

one of which was a confirmed rebel but HEY whatever ITS NOT LIEK YOU KILL THEM IN GENERAL ANYWAY

who gives a fuck this trial is janked

“bahlgilpo’kon hell- the realm of eternal agony”

wow eternal agony is the bottom hell??? thats like the first hell in dante’s hells; youre soft as runny shit kooraheenism.

“there she will suffer the endless punishment of ja’gar by the galuun of Puhlmo’ten.”

SUBTITLES PLEASE

he was killed during the rite but they only found his body like two days later?!?!

what the fuck!?

...and wait a fucking second, he wasnt there when we were fucking investigating BULLSHIT

BUUULLLLLSSSHHHIIIIIIT!!!

two consecutive murders constitutes a serial killer??

every time sadmad sighs and shakes his head i lose a year of my life

Rayfa’s voice is so fucking unfitting; she’s got the voice of a 30 year old woman and she’s supposed to be a whiny-ass 14 year old

do these people know anything about casting??

is it really that hard to get a 14 year old to say a few lines? i was voice acting (not professionally obvs) when i was 14. i sucked, but i was doing it, and there’ve been younger kids working on real shows.

anyway

welp looks like this mcfuck is using a fake name

someone get on that

I'm sorry you’re surrounded by such incompetence, Rayfa. and i mean that. i like you now, youre kinda funny.

phoenix: plus, yesterday, someone told me how the divination seance used to work

phoenix fucking sucks at keeping secrets jesus christ holy fuck just SHUT UP ABOUT THE REBELS YOU MORON

if he says let it go and move on again I'm going to fucking scream

“haha! the police overlooked the clergy tattoo on the back of his neck!”

directly below the stab wound. the clergy tattoo. that has significance in their country.

Why do the Kooraheen Police suck so much ass? They can’t catch a running suspect, and apparently they’re all blind.

HOW DOES THE JUDGE NOT FUCKING KNOW A RELIGIOUS SYMBOL FROM HIS OWN FUCKING RELIGION?!?!?

[insert nahyuta eats (peach emoji)ass joke]

“aren't they utterly different shapes?”

...a... peach... and an upside down peach?!

nahyuta

im gonna blow your mind

this is called a handstand, here, do it with me

lazy ass parents naming their kid “real name”

fuck this joke country

this is some ‘who's on first’ bullshit

RAYFA LUSTS FOR BLOOD

yeah it was freezing on that mountain, of course your estimate was wrong.

i knew this was coming...

hebLINDED HER WITH SCIENCE

BEEP BA BOO BA

“this article is small in size but huge in importance!”

just like my d––

How... did this work? They did a great job of hiding that wound...

also no blood at the “scene of the crime”

yeah not suspicious at all

once again the prosecution blames the detective for something they couldn’t have helped :/

GUARD YOUR ASSHOLE EMA, GUARD YOUR ASSHOLE

HOLY SHIT

INSERT REFERENCE TO ABOVE PEACH JOKE

loud ass clock inside a secret hideout? good one, rebels. super well done.

ahhhh

now that is clever. i like that

although, considering the length of that statue’s beak, he should’ve been impaled right through his body, so.....

you were close, SOJ

glad to see more clever twists though.

game ruins everything with blatant hints

there are other cases where they can tell when two weapons have been used on the same wound

why cant they tell now?

stone sharp enough to cut skin??

your hideout is fucking death trap

good going rebels

youre using serial killer wrong... again

thats a lie, nobody likes swiss cheese

LAY OFF CHEESE YOU PIECE OF SHIT

ILL RIP YOUR ASS OUT

“what you said is total bullshit!! heres what happened; this, this this. and since I said it ,its true! without any proof!!! SO THERE”

phoenix: VALID POINT!

sadmad: bullshit excuse

judge: sounds legit, overruled!

“jeez just toss me an Axe if its that bad...”

“plotting your escapee from this sacred hall?”

yeah well just run out

“you would pin a crime upon the dead, who you know tell no tales?”

did you just forget the whole

soul pool thing or

are you just stupid

aw baby here we go

stop saying 30% you dont know shit

oh my god

whoa whats he doing with the magatama

“wait... i think i saw something just now...”

what, phoenix

what did you see, hmm?

“the power of prayer! yes... it uh... helps you... install listening devices in your secrets base uuhhhhhh...ITS NOT WEIRD

“She has a way of putting me at ease...”

(weeps) my babies

(sigh) its the wife, get on with it

“long years of ascetic training have sharpened my ears”

god the training is more useful to Athena than it is Maya. this is depressing.

make like a mollusc and clam up??? who says that???????

boy you sure fuckin suck at this Mr. Inmee

judging by that KAAHHH Tahrust should have a deep voice, and DD had a deeper male voice blip... why aren't they using it? they've already implemented singing blips and tutting blips, did they forget about the extra deep blips?

or are those reserved for demons?

he is a ghost...

...how far along is behleeb anyway? either I'm blind or the sprite artist forgot to give her a baby bump.

hey yeah! she's barely pregnant! her character art shows that! so its not so much of a stretch that she could be running around killing rebels. Plus, she hasn’t been pregnant for two years...

...of course, its not her, it’s rUHEEL NAYMUH, but still. she’s not far along enough to be inconvenienced by her child.

potato potahto tomahto egg salad!!

stop praying at me, nahyuta.

dont you fucking dare...

dont you even fucking dare

THEY DARED

I SWEAR TO FUCK

i swear to fuck

so. youre gonna blame maya. for the actions. of YOUR OWN GODDESS.

WHO’S GREAT AND POWERFUL AND MYSTICAL AND WISE AND PERFECT.... UNLESS SHE’S BEING CHANNELED BY A DIRTY FOREIGNER?

i just i cannot express how angry this makes me. it doesn’t make any fucking sense and it’s complete and utter hypocrisy. it’s even worse than before; before they were suggesting that the person dressed as Lady Kee’ra was killing rebels in her name, if it wasn’t outright her. Now they’re suggesting it was LITERALLY HER, and remember, these people are UBER RELIGIOUS, and they still have a problem with THEIR IMMORTAL GODDESS IN THE FLESH exacting her divine punishment against people THAT ARE HARMING THEIR COMMUNITY ANYWAY???

yes, vigilantism is dangerous. but it gets a little more fucking complicated when you suggest that it’s the legit actions of an ACTUAL GODDESS.

and even if this is the corrupt government just trying to cover up deaths (which it is) why didn’t they just step in and go “Yeah, another Lady Kee’ra murder. All hail the marvellous goddesses. er diarrhoea kooraheen.”

it would be a lot easier and a lot less messy than taking a kid to court. why do they even want Maya out of the way, anyway? She didn’t know any of the rebels, and she posed no threat to their corrupt government. Yeah, Zealot’s dead, but they literally could have just hired another crazy assassin.

Unless there’s a REAL GOOD FUCKIN REASON for all of this, I call bullshit, bullshit bULLSHIT

i think it’s time to let your head go and move on to another room sadmad

at the same time

...plus they legit just forgot their own lore.

maya can’t summon Kee’ra if she doesn’t know what she looks like.

that was so easy i didnt have to even press on statements; thats how easy that contradiction is. thats how easy it is to remember something stated five minutes ago, and how easy it is to remember how your own religion works. you fuckhats.

oh hey i just realized Tahrust really does call Behleeb his “lovely wife”

aw. how nice. if only they didnt decide to scapegoat maya.

doesn't matter your intentions; you die if you scapegoat maya. you die by my blade.

you ok pal. is an alarm clock really the source of an evil laugh.

“indeed! we leave the alarm switched off at all times!”

why would you even have a clock with an alarm on it in a secret base anyway?? and how did phoenix manage to play it in the hideout if the alarm was switched off?

“those distinctive taiko drums”

fuckin’ finally

ive been waiting for that stupid watch to come back for AAAGEES

of course there was a reason maya would mention traditional japanese instruments...

y’know it’s funny that he would even make that fuckup in the first place. if he’s a plumed punisher fan, he should know how the theme song goes. his wife was at least a big fan, meaning he’d probably have heard the opening enough times to know that Taiko drums weren’t part of it. Furthermore, if he was banking on the fact that the two themes sound similar to pass off the deception, then it was a huge mistake on his part to define the sound as Taiko drums; thats just a needless detail that could get him caught out, which it did.

and if he just didn��t know, well... again, useless detail. always bad. always be vague if you wanna get away with shit.

ah... at least in death, Raheel Namer didn’t have to suffer the Plumed Punisher theme song.

i love that phoenix refers to the show by it’s full title. that’s adorable.

now what’s really confusing me is that that Photo of the fam is stated to have been taken during the Feast of whatever. Which is the same time-frame as Reely Real Name’s death. He’s alive in the photo, Behleeb is in the photo, and the Judge and his family are nowhere to be found. But all those things were huge parts of the case, and they couldn’t have eaten before or after because of the whole ‘you can only eat Ghingil for three hours on that one special day’.

am I missing something or going nuts??

that said I'm so glad i can finally present this photo. it’s been gnawing at me as much as the watch thing.

“trademark topknot”

OH PLEASE JUST LET IT END

ffjglk dlg ljlgkd hey Tahrust do me a solid and just tell them how you died ok

please i have a family

i have stomach ulcers

off-brand logic

i totally forgot that was in this game too

wow.

“hmm, there’s really nothing to suggest a murder other than the red water in the spring, which only Maya would see and probably not question (considering this isn’t her religion and she doesn’t fuckin know how that shit works) and said spring probably empties somewhere, since it would be swampy otherwise. let’s see... i can KILL MYSELF TO GIVE THE RED WATER A REASON FOR EXISTING or do literally anything else... WELP, BETTER FUCKIN KILL MYSELF. ALL HAIL THE REBELS!”

...well at least he saved maya from contracted a blood disease.

tahrust must be pissed that his death came to naught when his own rebel pals gave the secret key to a guy who sold them out in five seconds.

never gets to meet his child... never gets to see the revolution come to fruition... never gets to live happily with his family... all because he couldn’t think of any other solution to protecting that shitty hovel behind a rock.

kinda tragic.

wish i was less angry

“there was no weapon at the inner sanctum...”

did everyone just forget the giant bloody murder statue???

pohl’fuckya sadmad

babe... oh no... don’t give yourself up like this

thats sad

dont

i feel the sad now

shit

“abbot inmee!! summon a physician at once!!’

HES DEAD

WAY TO RUIN THE MOMENT WITH UNINTENTIONAL COMEDY DUMBASS

“but murder sanctioned by the crown is still murder”

what’s murder sanctioned by a goddess? apparently you guys are ok with that one. oh unless it’s a goddess being channeled by a foreigner.

soerry im bitter about that one moving on now

he lunged at you from behind the stone slab?? nice trajectory moron

hang on a second he put reereenaymee’s body in the plaza before prayer time... with the dagger still in him??

HOW DID NOBODY NOTICE THE FUCKING DAGGER

“you need not frame the accused for your crime”

for once Sadmad says something smart

honestly... suicide really wasn’t the answer. even if it was to protect your wife there were,,,,, so many other options

for example, realname’s last moments, as we saw, made it look like he was killed in the Plaza of devotion. You could have so easily made it look like he was murdered there, by some rando, during the rite. The kooraheen police fucking suck at their job, so it wouldn’t matter. but no; you had to die, and blame Maya.... because she was foreign. A foreigner who came to you for guidance and shelter.

STOP AGREEING WITH ME SADMAD, I DONT LIKE YOU

“You must use your law powers to make sure no more innocent people suffer under this shitty law!!

...like Maya did!! .......because of me!!

i love that the excuse is like “there’s no way she could prove it was self defence in this government...” to make it all tear-jerking and point out how horrible and corrupt their legal system is...

...and yet, if we remember Reunion and Turnabout, which also included channeling and self defence... It was EQUALLY impossible for Maya to be cleared of the crime on self-defence charges!!

pot calling the kettle black, japanifornia!

“lol sorry for almost getting you killed cause i couldn't think of a better plan than kill myself”

yea thanks tahrust, coo-al

“I ask that you look after my wife”

er she’s... going to jail... she’s... been outed as a rebel... you do get that right

fuck you Tahrust, you made her cry

“now you can watch over me from the world beyond”

he cant actually, since they retconned spirits being conscious in the afterlife. good going, capcom.

oh man that cutscene was goofy. except for the crying

fuck you Tahrust

Maya: :D hOW y'all doin?!

also according to maya Tahrust didnt leave any regrets behind which means that he totally gives no fucks that his dumbass plan endangered Maya’s life and made his wife cry. Dick.

He doesn't even regret missing the birth of his fuckin child. Ass.

Sadmad: I owe a debt to you, one that I will return––

Me: Eat a rotten egg.

Sadmad: Wha-–

Me: Go on, master of putrescence. Eat a whole rotten egg. Consume it shell and all. You heard me. Insert the egg into your mouth and chomp down. Times ticking, I’m waiting.

i forgot about the stupid butterflies

“So I was thinking, Nick, the legal system here is really stacked agains the defence! It’s really unfair!”

YA DONT SAY

listen to this happy music playing as everyone is forced to come to terms with all this sad ass shit. also it appears we just forgot about that tiny matter of the government literally putting hits out. Rayfas dad. is doing this. Nobody gonna address that?? No? Ok

Maya: QUIT BEINA LIL BITCH

wait what

what is this new sprite

eurhg i dont like it put it away

thats not maya thats a husk of evil

wow. rayfa didnt even know why maya was here training. the bullshit continues to flow...

Maya: deciding what is true and what is false for your people...

the actual truth and lies, right? RIGHT? MAYA???

ergh this is so... corny? schlocky? it feels forced

“Sorry for almost getting you killed anyway VIVE LA REVOLUTION”

Yay! It’s vore man!! i kinda missed his stretchy face.

oh well that

thats just a really anticlimactic reveal of Dhurke

like tada! there he is! and he's gone! whatever; he's just been talked about in hushed whispers for the last case or w/e!

awww the bailiff thinks he can catch a running rebel!! so cute~

“The Steel Samurai vs Dhurke the Rebel!”

MAYA. THE LAST FIVE MINUTES WERE DEVOTED TO EXPLAINING THAT THE REBELS ARE THE GOOD GUYS. WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM???

i love that they keep hammering in that “maya has stayed maya”

see guys??? dont you just feel the magic of the trilogy??? ITS THERE GUYS WE SWEAR

Welp, thats it for that case. Now back to America, to visit Athena and BK, and hopefully to read a more enjoyable storyline...

#sulking over SOJ #soj spoilers #soj spoilers obvs]

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