"Though I am often in the depths of misery, there is still calmness, pure harmony, and music inside me."
two roads diverged
in a yellow wood
i was holding your
hand but you
took the wrong one
so i dropped your hand
‘see you on the other side’
and i laughed
forests are great places
(insp. The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost)
It hurts so much feeling like I’m never good enough. I feel like I’m only someone temporary until something or someone better comes along. I don’t wanna feel like this anymore. It’s breaking me.
I want to scream. I want to scream until my throat becomes raw, until my nose is bloody, until my face is damp from the tears.
I want to scream until the earth splits in two, until the stars come falling down, until the sky shatters, until the volcanoes rumble with destruction.
I want to scream until you hear me in heaven, until you hear me on earth, until you hear me in the fiery pits of your hell, until you hear me now and forever, everywhere.
I want to scream until you come back, until you find me, until you hold me, until you love me again.
I want to scream until I shatter, until i’m nothing, until to dust i shall return, until the pain stops, until everything stops.
I don’t scream. I swallow my pain until it fills me completely, until nothing else is there, until it kills me.
I need someone that loves me thoroughly. Through and through the easy and the hard. Someone who is unconditionally compassionate towards me. So that my heart may find rest. So that I can dwell in safety. I need true kindness and support. I need to bathe in their honesty, sip from their reassurance. I need effortless celebration of the glory of who I am. I need to be gripped firmly, not tightly. No noise, no chaos. Balance. Ease. Healing. Reception. Through and through.
-jamera naquai | Through & Through
"Please don't leave me,"
Her words echoed
Yet nobody cared.
The boy kept on moving
Pretending to be unaffected.
Until he realized
The water falling on his hands
Isn't the rain anymore.
The cracking of something
Isn't a dead leaf no more.
And the girl he is leaving behind
Won't be his anymore.
Suppressing his sobs.
He kept on walking.
And mumbling to himself.
"Please don't love me more."
Some people don't leave us because they want to...but because they have to.
It's a harsh truth but we all are just meant to live through!
Everyone tells you its gonna be okay but its almost 3 years now .
“How did you cope with your childhood?”
I searched in my mind,
for the deepest,
darkest room I could find,
I hid inside,
and watched as my life,
pass me by.
-Hania Lín/ “Spoiled Milk”
I can’t believe we went from strangers to friends, from friends to lovers, and then turned into strangers again. I shared everything with you, even my darkest secrets. But now a simple hello seems too hard to say. How did we get here?
" I am eternally, devastatingly romantic and I thought people would see it because 'romantic' doesn't mean 'sugary'. Its dark and tormented — the furor of passion, the despair of idealism that you can't attain "
"I need to stop fantasizing about running away to some other life, and start figuring out the one I have."