Put this off a bit to answer because I’ve been thinking a lot over the last year and well
Last year today was the day I was rushed to the ER because my heart went into SVT due to extreme stress and Covid.
This past year has been full of amazing blessing: I got in a relationship with, proposed to, and married my best friend; I got to travel and meet some friends irl that I met online, got to visit some warships, aircraft, and submarines; got so many amazing gifts and met so many amazing people! But a lot of not so good things happened this year too. For the first time ever I actually contemplated suicide after a lot of past trauma resurfaced. I came many realizations about how unhealthy a lot of my past relationships had been and I’ve been struggling to see things as they are- I keep looking through a lens of trauma and fear and it’s been really getting to me in how I see myself and my relationships. I keep thinking that my friends aren’t my friends anymore and hate me. I keep putting blame on myself because it’s easier to feel guilty than to come to terms with how people have hurt me. I was even officially diagnosed with PTSD!
Though I wouldn’t change anything about this past year it has been an uphill battle for the latter end of it and I’ve been struggling to regain my footing. I’m grateful for so many good experiences and things are looking up with treatment for a lot of this past stuff but it doesn’t mean that I’m doing well.
I’m hopeful but not well.
With all that being said however I will be taking a break from tumblr, I may still check it but I’m not going to be active for a little while. I love tumblr, the community, and friends I’ve made since I rejoined the mlp ask blog community here but there is also a lot of memories here that I need to work though as well.
Thank you guys for everything and see you again soon!
also uh, pensamiento que tengo desde hace unos días, pero me pregunto si maverick alguna vez habrá matado a alguien, siendo que siempre tuvo gustos "curiosos" en cuanto a gente, y le habrá tocado algún loquito que le pidió que mate a alguien. y obvio que él lo haría.
My first impression comes from when you were really focused on sw and hk because!! I was too!!!! You seemed really funny (I still love your "down with cis" "you mean the cis, right? Right?" comic) and I was honestly really intrigued by what you posted about Lurien (because I also really like him and didn't see many posts about him before).
Now you're my yttd/kai loving bestie mutual, who also helped me get ace attorney (which I really gotta continue playing). Chatting with you is always fun and I'm always surprised at how many interests we have in common (formerly sw, but also hk, ace attorney, yttd, vocaloids and also hermitcraft/the life series). I just think it's neat :] (and that face too!! You use it a lot and every time I see it it reminds me of you)
OUHH oh man you've been around for a long time then!!! i didn't even realize we've known each other that long holy shit.
but heyyy!!! we have a lot of the same taste huh x] both w media and characters... time moves on but we are still in sync, somehow!
i'm honestly surprised that people haven't really gone in-depth about lurien outside of his relation with the king...? & iirc you were very nice about sort of talking back-and-forth about him w me which i still really appreciate :D you're very kind bro <3 i love you & you're very fun to talk to too!! :D