for all your analysis needs, i present to you minutes 51:43-1:09:56 (all arguments in the ruins of the community house) of the green festival vod transcripted. i spent hours and hours on this PLEASE reblog
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Tubbo: Tommy did this?
Dream: Tommy blew up the Community House.
Tubbo: I don’t understand.
[Indistinguishable yelling]
Dream: We were this close to peace! We were this close! I trusted you guys for once ever!
Tubbo: Wait. We had no--we had nothing to do with this, Dream.
Fundy (overlapping): This has nothing to do with us.
Dream: You- you- you didn’t- you didn’t- you- you didn’t know- at all. You had no idea.
Ranboo: There’s no affiliation.
Fundy: No! No! No! No! No! No!
Quackity: Why would we affiliate with some dumb shit Tommy does?
Tubbo: Zero idea!
Quackity: Why?
Dream: Cause Tubbo--Tubbo, listen. You still have his disc.
Tubbo: Yeah? What about the--
Dream: That means you’re affiliated. No matter what. That is his most prized--
Tubbo: It doesn’t--
Dream: --possession. And if I don’t have the disc, or he doesn’t have the disc, then guess what! You are affiliated! You have the disc!
Tubbo: I don’t-- I don’t-- I don’t--
Dream: Look what he did!
Tubbo: I don’t know why he would do this!
[Unintelligible arguing]
Ranboo: He has nothing to do with--
Dream: This was the oldest building on the server!
Fundy: Yes it was but he was-- [banging desk] he was supposed to stay away, Dream!
Tubbo: I don’t--
Fundy: He was exiled!
Dream: Yes, and he came back.
Tubbo: Why?
Dream: And you know who knew he came back?
Fundy: Why--What is this--wha- wha- Why would he--
Tubbo: Who knew he came- Woah, woah, everyone be--Who knew he came back?
Dream: Alright, listen. [pause] I’ll tell you in a minute. This is what needs to happen, okay? Look, you--you need--you have to--he has to pay for this. He can’t just--He can’t just come and like--listen, this is terrorism!
Tubbo: Yeah--
Dream: This is the worst--This is the worst event that has ever happened on the server. This is the oldest building. The most historic building on the entire server. And the only major structure of the Greater Dream SMP.
Tubbo: I can’t believe he would do this.
Quackity: Why?
Tubbo: I can’t bel- I can’t believe it.
Quackity: When?
Dream: I need you- I need you to--
Quackity: Are we getting walled out though? I don’t- I don’t- I don’t get it! What- what- what- what affiliates us to him?
Fundy: Yeah, exactly.
Dream: Because Tubbo has--Tubbo is the president and Tubbo. Has. The disc.
Tubbo: I don’t--
Ranboo: But aren’t you supposed to be the one who’s watching him the entire time?
Tubbo: You were meant to enforce his exile, Dream. I don’t see how this comes down on us.
Ranboo: You have to enforce how he’s been exiled.
Dream: How- how could I enforce his exile if I don’t have the disc.
Tubbo: You have one of them, do you not?
Dream: I have one. I don’t have both. I need both.
Tubbo: You need- both. [pause] I actually just can’t believe he would do this.
IDK WHO THIS PERSON IS CRY: This- this needs to be handed over and burned, right now.
Fundy: It’s- it’s- this has nothing to do with anything!
Dream: See, Punz has been around, Punz knows.
Quackity: Stop affiliating us!
Dream: Callahan is even here! Callahan’s even here to see the destruction.
Fundy: This has nothing to do with anything!
Dream: This is the worst thing that’s ever happened. Just--
Ranboo: This doesn’t have anything to do with L’manberg.
Quackity: But this isn’t our fault, we didn’t do this!
Fundy: It really isn’t! This is what Tommy did! We- we- we’re--
Dream: Okay but listen! You’re right, you’re right, you’re right, you’re right. This is what Tommy did. I won’t--I won’t blame you.
Tubbo: Okay.
Dream: But give me the disc.
Fundy: What?
Quackity: What?
Fundy: That’s--this is--
Dream: Listen! If you’re not affiliated with Tommy, then give me the dumb disc! That’ll solve everything! Everyone wins here! I bet you--Sapnap, Callahan, Ponk, Badboyhalo, everybody, Awesamdude, literally everybody here!
Fundy: Tubbo?
Sam: We built this house before anybody else was even on this server.
Ponk: Yeah!
Sam: I can’t believe this.
Fundy: This is- I-
Sam: I…
Ponk: This has gone too far.
Tubbo: There must be another way, surely, surely. Is there any other way?
Dream: No. There’s not- there’s not another way, Tubbo.
Punz ? : Fundy, you can hand over the disc.
Ranboo: There’s gotta be another way. There’s gotta be.
Tubbo: So you’re saying--I need to give--Is one not enough? Both of them are--It just seems--
Dream: No because if you have one then he’s always- he’ll always have faith that he can just get it back because you’re affiliated. Look, I- you, if you want nothing to do with Tommy, then have nothing to do with Tommy. Don’t- don’t associate yourself by having the most- one of the most prized possessions on the server. He just destroyed the most prized building on the server. This has been around since the beginning!
Tubbo: I just can’t believe it.
Quackity: It doesn’t- it doesn’t make sense! Ohhh my god. I don’t understand why we have to--
Tubbo: I just don’t believe it.
Quackity: --why we have to keep suffering the consequences of his stupid actions.
Tubbo: He was meant to be gone!
Fundy: He was gone! He was gone!
Ranboo: He was gone!
Fundy: When did this- when did this happen?
Tubbo, claiming his dog: Oh, sorry, that’s mine.
Dream: It happened- I don’t know, I logged on and the Community House--
Fundy: It literally- I literally-
Dream: I don’t know. I logged on and it was- I was in the Community House and I was just in water.
Tubbo: I don’t-
Dream: This was my safe place to… y’know, be safe. But listen, listen.
Fundy: What’s the reason for telling--
Dream: I need the discs. I need the disc.
Fundy: Dream--
Tommy: No!
Tubbo: What--?
Tommy: No, no. Li- li- li- li- no, no you- you don’t--
Tubbo: Uh…
Fundy: Tommy?
Dream [referring to Tommy’s in game character, who is invisible but wearing armour]: Is this you? Are you in this?
Tubbo: Is that--
Tommy: Yeah. Yeah you don’t need-- You don’t need--
Dream: Tommy, listen. You fucked up! I’m- I- I don’t ca- Like listen. Tubbo’s going to give me the discs--
Tommy: It’s what--No! No, Dream, Dream, Dream, Dream! This doesn’t look like something I would do?
Dream: YES! YES IT LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING YOU WOULD DO! WHO ELSE WOULD DO IT?
Technoblade: Guys, guys. Tommy didn’t do this, okay? He didn’t do this.
Punz ?: Okay Technoblade.
Fundy: That’s Technoblade? Why- why are you both here?
Tubbo: Why are you here?
Technoblade: GUYS! Okay, listen. Listen, I know I’m probably not the most reliable person to the government, but Tommy wouldn’t lie to me, okay? He said he didn’t do it--
Tommy: Yes! I don’t lie!
Technoblade: He wouldn’t lie to me.
Tommy: Unless he--
Dream: He lied about burning George’s house down! “He wouldn’t lie” he’s the biggest liar on the server!
Niki ?: He lies about everything!
Technoblade: He wouldn’t lie to ME, Dream! He’d lie to you but he wouldn’t lie to me!
Dream: He’s the biggest liar on the server!
Tommy: No!
Dream: Technoblade, I don’t think this involves you.
Jack Manifold: That’s true.
Technoblade: Now I- I didn’t wanna be involved either, but Tommy ran in, man! I--
Fundy: Wait, so Tommy did do this?
Dream: Yes, Tommy did this.
Ranboo: Why?
Tubbo: So, I mean the fact that you’re here kind of proves his point. You’re not where you’re supposed to be.
Dream: Yeah, you’re supposed to be exiled! You’re not supposed to be here!
Tommy: Yeah, yeah! We thought- we thought- we thought we could--
Dream: Why are you here?
Tommy: We thought we could give our friend a pat on the back with knives!
Dream: You destroyed--
Technoblade: I mean you’re out here accusing him of crimes and you’re saying just defending himself makes him guilty?
Dream: He’s not even supposed to be here!
Technoblade: Ah, yeah. Whatever. Laws, cringe.
Tommy: No, you can’t- no, this- no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Technoblade: This isn’t even part of L’manberg, this is part of--wait I don’t know where this is actually.
Dream: Tubbo, just give me the disc.
Ranboo: Dream SMP.
Tubbo: I’m- I just-
Technoblade: Ah, yeah, Dream SMP. Thank you, Ranboo.
Tommy: You’re not gonna-
Ranboo: You’re welcome.
[Tubbo opens the enderchest and Tommy hits him.]
Tommy: Woah, stop, stop it!
Fundy: Are you actually--?
Tubbo: Woah!
Tommy: What the fuck! You’re not just gonna give him the disc, are you?
Tubbo: You- you’ve literally proven time and time again that you can’t be trusted!
Tommy: What? What, no I haven’t. No, no, no, no, you have to exile me! Don’t give him the disc cause as soon as we- as soon as we, y’know, take down [unintelligable] then we’re fine! We’re fine! We’ll be- we’ll be back! [pause] w-
Tubbo: I don’t think that’s an option anymore.
Tommy: Tubbo, you spend all this time, you do all these speeches, talking about how I was a bad friend, how I was the one being reckless, and going out and doing things, and being bad! But… you won’t even stick up for me right- right at my lowest point. Do you know- do you know what he did to me in exile, Tubbo?
Tubbo: No!
Tommy: You don’t.
Tubbo: I thought you died!
Tommy: But you didn’t come and see me. And you still don’t care I’m here. You know what? You’re the shit friend, Tubbo.
Tubbo: Yeah, well, at least- this has your name written all over it!
Tommy: IT WASN’T ME, IT WASN’T ME! This has nothing to do with [unintelligable]
Tubbo: You’re literally acting exactly as you acted when you burned down George’s house!
Tommy: Yeah, but in my defense, that times- that time was funny.
Tubbo, laughing: That is not a defense!
Tommy: That just wasn’t me, this wasn’t me, this wasn’t me.
Tubbo, still laughing: That is not a defense!
Tommy: This wasn’t- I promise- let me--Eh. Listen to me.Seriously. Seriously, man.
Tubbo: Seriously?
Tommy: I don’t need to prove myself to you. This wasn’t me. Trust me. Jesus Christ. For once in your life, Tubbo, trust me!
Tubbo: I did trust you. Once. The first time all of this happened. And I won’t make the same mistake twice. [He opens the ender chest, taking out the disc.]
Tommy: Don’t you dare.
[Tubbo holds the disc in his hand and Tommy gasps.]
Tommy: Tubbo, you betrayed me. You betrayed me.
[Tubbo holds his axe for a moment before moving to hold nothing again.]
Tommy: You know that, right? You know you betrayed me.
Tubbo: Yeah, well at least I’m not--
Tommy: What- don’t- don’t get out your axe. What- are you tryna- You betrayed me, Tubbo.
Tubbo: I didn’t betray you! You betrayed everything you had built with presidents prior just to go off on this little tyrant-
Tommy, overlapping with Tubbo: No. You BETRAYED ME! Everything, all of this, this is what Wilbur--You betrayed everything.
Tubbo: I don’t think I have.
Tommy: Just look. You know what? You got your axe up? [Tommy eats a gapple.]
Technoblade: Tommy-?
Tommy: Yes?
Technoblade: Tommy, there’s like 30 people here, there’s like 30 people here, Tommy- Whatever you decide, whatever you decide, Tommy-
[Tommy hits Tubbo, Tubbo hits back.]
Technoblade: Make that decision wisely, Tommy--
[Tubbo and Tommy start to full on fight.]
Technoblade: Oh, god. Oh, we’re goin’ in, we’re goin’ in-
Fundy: No, no, don’t actually, DON’T ACTUALLY, NO-
Quackity: No.
Ranboo: No, no.
Technoblade: We’re goin’ in-
Tommy: You BETRAYED me, Tubbo!
Tubbo: NO! You failed the nation!
Technoblade: We’re goin’ in-
Ranboo: No, no, no, no, no, no-
Tommy: You BETRAYED me!
Tubbo:That is just NOT TRUE!
Tommy: I- what- you did! You did! You betrayed me!
[Fundy screeches.]
Tubbo: No, I didn’t!
Tommy: Everything! This is what Wilbur wanted!
Technoblade: Hey, Fundy!
Tubbo: You gave up on the nation-
Tommy: He wanted you to betray everyone! To forget what was right.
Tubbo: No! No, you betrayed everyone when you went off and did your own thing and teamed up with the very person who blew up the nation!
Techonblade: You’re not in L’manberg, guys, you’re not in L’manberg.
Tommy: You left me to die.
Tubbo: Tommy, you teamed up with the very person that blew up the nation!
Dream: OH, I WANTED TO DO THIS FOR A LONG TIME-
Tubbo: Tommy, you teamed up with Technoblade, I didn’t leave you to die, I was not invited. [pause] Where are you?
Tommy, reappearing: You betrayed me.
Tubbo: I didn’t betray you, you teamed up with the very person that destroyed our nation the first time!
Tommy: Our nation- Tubbo, the discs! The discs were worth more than you ever were.
Tubbo: Not-
[Dream gasps and laughs excitedly.]
Niki: Oh… god.
Tubbo: I don’t- [pause[ You meant- You-
Tommy: Just…
[Both Tommy and Tubbo take their armour off.]
Dream: Hey.
Technoblade: Hey, you-
Tommy: Give him the disc.
Technoblade: Tommy-
Tubbo: You want me to… give him the disc?
Tommy: I’m not…
Dream: So gimme the disc!
Tommy: What am I…
Tubbo: What- I- d- are you sure?
Tommy: Yeah, this…
Tubbo: Are you sure?
Dream: Yeah, you heard him. He realizes he needs to pay. That’s what he- he’s finally realizing.
Tommy: They were, they… Just not true.
Tubbo: I…
Tommy: I’m sor-
Tubbo: I… [undistinguishable beginnings of words]
Tommy: I- I’m sorry, Tubbo.
Tubbo: I’m sorry.
Tommy: No, no.
Tubbo: Do you want me to-
Tommy: Just- no. Just give him the disc.
[Tubbo gives Dream the disc.]
[Dream whoops excitedly.]
Technoblade: Tommy- Tommy are you sure about that decision, Tommy-
Tubbo: I don’-
Fundy: It’s already made…
Technoblade: The difficulty just went way up, Tommy, I’m just sayin’-
Tommy: What am I…
Tubbo: I- I don’t-
Tommy: What am I doing?
[Dream laughs.]
Technoblade: Tommy- Tommy-
Dream: Thank you, Tubbo.
Technoblade: Tommy, what are you doing-
Tommy: Techno-
Dream: I really appreciate it.
Tommy: I’m so- I’m so- I’m- I- y- this isn’t me, this isn’t- I mean, I look around, and I’m not the person I wanna be.
Technoblade: Tommy, what are you saying-
Tommy: And I- I- I w- I- I- I- [sighs] I’m so sorry.
Technoblade: Tommy, we could get out of here, Tommy, we could pearl out, I’d cover your escape, Tommy- We can still get out of here, Tommy! We can regroup! We can plan for another day, Tommy!
Tommy: Techno, Techo- if this is what I’ve become-
Technoblade: Oh, we’re surrounded.
Tommy: -then I don’t wanna be me anymore, man. I- I- I’m- I’m-
Technoblade: Tommy, what are you sayin’.
Tommy: I’m sorry.
Technoblade, after a pause: What do you mean, Tommy?
Tommy: I’m with Tubbo.
Technoblade: HEH. Tommy, when I said- Perhaps I wasn’t clear yesterday, Tommy, when I said that I’m going to destroy L’manberg and that you don’t- you don’t have to help me. When I said you don’t have to help me, Tommy, I MEANT THAT YOU COULD SIT IT OUT! NOT SWITCH SIDES AND FIGHT AGAINST ME!
Tommy: I’m not- Techno, what am I doing? Wha- What am I- W-
Technoblade: You’re betraying me is what you’re doing, Tommy!
Tommy: [unintelligable] Technoblade! The discs- [splutters] I- [splutters again]
Technoblade: You just told him to give the disc to Dream!
Tommy: I’m worse than everyone I didn’t want to be. [pause, sighs] I- you know that- you know- you know-
Technoblade: Tommy. Think hard- think hard about this before you make this decision, Tommy.
Tommy: I-
Technoblade: Cause you can’t undo this. You can’t undo this decision, Tommy.
Tommy: [sighs] Technoblade, I know what I’ve done and I hate me for it. I’m sorry.
Tecnoblade: Wowww. WELP! One v 30 it is! Who wants to go up first!
Dream: No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Listen, Listen, listen.
Technoblade: Oookay.
Dream: Tubbo, Tubbo.
Tubbo: Yeah.
Dream: I- I- I- yeah, well, thank you for giving me the disc.
Tubbo: Mhm.
Dream: I just wanna say that you’re an idiot.
Fundy: Wha-
Dream: You. Are. An absolute idiot. And you have no power, and you are the worst president that has ever been president electe- because you’re no president at all!
Fundy: No!
Dream: Listen, listen! You’re not even president!
Technoblade: TUBBO SUCKS!
Dream: You’re not even president! Quackity is more president than you. I’M more president of L’manberg than you! You listen to- you get pushed around by everybody on this server.
Technoblade: YEAH, TELL ‘IM!
Dream: Because you ARE AN IDIOT. You are a BUFFOON. You are a FOOL. You fall for everything.
Technoblade: YOU ARE A COWARD.
Dream: YOU JUST GAVE ME THE ONE THING I NEEDED TO DESTROY L’MANBERG. I DON’T CARE ABOUT L’MANBERG. I don’t care about anything, I’ve said this before. The only reason I did not destroy L’manberg was because you had the disc. I had to be friends with you to get the disc! I don’t care about you. I’m not your friend. Okay? I cared about getting the disc back, and I got it back. I got it back. And that’s- that’s- that’s the only thing that really matters! You can’t even run your nation right! RANBOO IS A TRAITOR! YOUR MOST TRUSTED FRIENDS!
Ranboo: Wha-
Tubbo: No, that’s not true.
Ranboo: No-
Dream: No, it IS TRUE! READ THIS BOOK!
Quackity: I fucking knew it.
Tubbo: What? Ranboo- what? Wait- What is this? [reading the name of the book] ‘do not read.’
Ranboo: I’m not- I’m not-
Dream: It’s his memory book! He was meeting with Techno and Tommy and told them everything!
Tubbo: What? Ranboo, you were the most loyal, you literally-
Fundy: What the FUCK, Ranboo?
Dream: It’s all of his own memories! He writes it down!
Technoblade: I mean all of this didn’t happen, I’ve never met that man in my life.
[Tubbo reads out of the book.]
Dream: You can’t even run your own nation correctly, Tubbo!
Technoblade: I can’t even spell Ranbo.
Dream: Listen.
Tubbo: What?
Dream: Tubbo- You, like- ugh. You- L’manberg is weaker than it’s ever been, and it’s because of you! You have- you have destroyed everything! You have ruined your friendships! You have ruined L’manberg’s allies! You have- you have just- You’re a horrible president, Tubbo.
Technoblade: YEAHHH! YOU SUCK, TUBBO!
Tubbo: Yeah. You’re right.
Dream: Techno.
Technoblade: Yeah?
Dream: You got any withers?
Tommy: Wha- wha-
Technoblade: Oh, I’m likin’ where this is goin’, Dream.
Fundy: No, no, no, no, no.
Tommy: Stop-
Tubbo: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no-
Ranboo: You can’t.
Technoblade: Are you sayin’ what I think you’re sayin’, Dream.
Dream: Oh, I’m saying what you think I’m saying.
Tommy: I’m [unintelligable], Tubbo.
Technoblade: Are you callin’ in that favour, Dream? To destroy L’manberg?
Dream: No, no I’m not calling in my favour. You would destroy L’manberg either way, are you kidding me? No. You would destroy it anyway, I’m not calling in my favour.
Technoblade: You know me so well.
Dream: Listen, listen.
Technoblade: I’ve got a few wither skulls, Dream. We can work something out.
Dream: Alright.
Technoblade, laughing: If we can get out of here alive.
Dream: Alright, listen, here--how ‘bout this, how ‘bout this? L’manberg is being destroyed, okay? Tomorrow, at 3pm. Say your goodbyes.
Tommy: No, no, no, no, no.
Fundy: No! No! No! No!
Dream: Say your goodbyes!
Tubbo: No, no, no, no, no!
Dream: Say your goodbyes! TOMORROW! It is being destroyed!
Technoblade: Why are we givin’ ‘em a day?
Fundy: No! No! No! No!
Dream: Listen! Tomorrow! 3pm!
Technoblade: I could do this in like three minutes!
Dream: 3pm tomorrow, you and--say your all goodbyes. Say your goodbyes. I- I’m tellin’ you, we are-
Technoblade: Whose dog is this?
Dream: We are destroying it-
[Tubbo gasps as Tommy kills his dog. Everyone else follows suit.]
Puffy: Tommy, that was Tubbo’s dog!
Tubbo: You killed my dog!
Technoblade: Wow.
Tommy: No-o!
Tubbo, laughing: Bruh! Come on, man!
Technoblade: You betrayed me, you killed Tubbo’s dog.
Tommy: It was a misclick! It was an accident!
Technoblade: Aw, yeah, it was a misclick!
Ranboo: Whoops, whoops.
[Tubbo laughs.]
Tommy: Hey, in my defense, it did bite me.
Dream: Listen, listen, when I’m saying destroy it, I’m not talking about- like, we’re gonna finish Wilbur’s job. We’re gonna destroy it all the way to bedrock.
Technoblade: Let’s chunk error this!
Dream: We’re not--yeah, we’re gonna chunk error this.
Tubbo: I…
Dream: Alright? We’re not even talking about just blowing up some TNT, alright? We’re gonna do TNT machines, cannons, we’re gonna destroy everything, withers, every wither possible.
Technoblade: Ah, yeah. I’m likin’ where this is goin’.
Dream: Everything’s gonna be gone! So, listen. You have one night, say your goodbyes forever.
Tubbo: I don’t- I-
Dream: Say your goodbyes forever!
Tubbo: What?
Quackity: What do you mean?
Tommy: What the fuck.
Dream: That’s- That’s it! That’s all, I’m leaving. [He begins walking out of the ruins of the Community House.]
Technoblade: We- we- we could give them, like, thirty minutes-
Tubbo: I don’t-
Dream: See you tomorrow.
Tubbo: What? I- I- I don’t-
Technoblade: Wait, he’s leavin’? Wait, wait- he just dipped?
Tubbo: What?
Technoblade, laughing: Wait, he just left? Oh, oh this is- oh. [He aims his crossbow wildly, looking at everyone surrounding him.]
Niki: Oh…
Fundy: Oh…
[Everyone surrounds Technoblade, hitting him.]
Technoblade: Mm, mm this is awkward, wait- Wait, wait, hold on, hold on a second here- Wait, hold on, lemme get my words in- Talkin’ is a free action, let’s hold on here, alright?
Tubbo: Oh?
Technoblade: Tommy. Give me back my axe. You’re not worthy, I was wrong.
Tommy: [gasps, then pauses] No. No, you know what, Technoblade? I am worthy. And you’re not- you’re not gonna side with Dream to take down L’manberg, are you? What the f-
Technoblade: I- I- I- I- I’ve- I’ve been so transparent about how I’m going to destroy the government.
Tommy, overlapping: WHYYYYY Why, no, no, no, go away.
Technoblade: I’ve explained my reasons, I’ve been like, I’m destroying it because of A, B, C, they executed me, they betrayed me, you betrayed me- you know what, Tommy? You’ve made a decision today that can’t be undone. And you know what? I respect you, Tommy, you know, you’re free to make your own choices, as wrong as they are--that’s what anarchy is about. It’s about freedom to do what you want. But all I have to say, Tommy, is that I hope you don’t come to regret it. Anyways, I’m gonna dip, there’s like thirty people here, [He escapes, swimming through the water around the ruined Community house] SEE YA, I’M OUT, BYE
Tubbo: NO!
Techonblade: SEE YA, IDIOTS! BYE, I’M OUTTA HERE! OH!
Fundy: I lost my b- oh, god damnit.
Technoblade, off camera: WAIT I ACTUALLY LOST ‘EM? SEE YA, IDIOTS! SEE YA, GOODBYE, HAHAHAHA! HAHAHA, NOT EVEN CLOSE!
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