Tumgik
#poorly made dsmp memes
poorlydrawnmcyt · 3 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
eternal duo
6K notes · View notes
hatchetislostpog · 2 years
Text
Guess who got arrested?
Ok, so this is a non-canon chapter for my Wattpad book (Wanna Race? by Pog4Life69) and the only thing you need to know everyone (in the DSMP) is a street racer. also, this is made before Aimsey was added so enjoy <3
     I was waiting outside Tommy's flat sitting in my car in a very expensive suit/dress Niki let me borrow. My hand pushed the button to open the window since there it was getting quite warm wearing the layers of expensive clothes. Where is he? I've been waiting out here for 10 minutes and 8 minutes ago he said he would be out in 5. My hand made its way back to my phone and the second I picked it up a text went through saying "coming" in all lowercase. My eyes wandered to the alleyway with all the ladders going up the side of the apartment building to see a certain blond climbing halfway down the ladders and then jumping to the platform. I put my hand to my face to holler at him like I was using a microphone, "You're going to kill yourself before you even make it to the car!"
     My voice echoed down the street and a random voice yelled, "Shut the hell up." Tommy was now on the floor sprinting to the car laughing so hard he was wheezing. I started to do the same. Tommy tried talking but couldn't get a single word out because of his laughter. Tommy hopped in the passenger seat during the next minute of laughing and finally started taking deep breaths to stop him from laughing, "That was so fucking random, but you totally deserve it. What if he was with a woman and you scared her off."
     I looked at Tommy and raised an eyebrow like that one Dwayne Johnson meme. Tommy just started bursting out in laughter. I looked at what he was wearing hoping he was wearing the right kind of clothes we need to pull this off. He was wearing a dark red blazer with dark red dress pants and black shoes. He had a normal white button-up with a creeper bow tie underneath. "Looking good Thomas ready to cause some havoc? Because I sure am," you may be wondering what we are planning, you will see eventually. 
     "Hell Ya, we look too snazzy not to be noticed," whilst he said that he popped the collar to his button-up which made him look like a wannabe cool middle-aged man. 
    "Tommy, you look like my grandfather when he got buried with your collar popped like that. Turn to me," the boy turned his body to me as I fixed his collar and redid his poorly done bowtie. "There ya go mate, you look way better. I'll have to keep the ladies off you," you both giggled at your little comment. 
     "Can I pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty please drive? I've never driven your car before, and you don't even know where this place is. I swear on my life I won't crash it," he started pleading to me. I've known Mr Tom Simons over here for a couple of months and he has been begging me for months now to drive my car. It has been nonstop; every single time we are in my car he asks. It isn't necessarily annoying, but I haven't said yes yet because he keeps on asking. Also, I've been waiting for a special time for him to drive it, I would say this is a pretty special night so... "Please Y/n do you don't understand how much of a Chad I will look like if I pull up in a sick car like this with an actual woman and not some mannequin"
    "I'm not even going to question the mannequin bit," at this point I'm not even surprised about the mannequin, "You know what, tonight's special hop out of the passenger seat and get us to McDonald's." Heh you guys finally figured out where we are going, we are going to McDonald's. We plan to go to McDonald's and pretend to be secret agents. After that, we are planning to catch a Black Tie party on a yacht and try to get on without being on the party list. We both look good, so I hope we do get on, and we will have future bragging rights on everyone at college. 
     We both got on our respective sides of the cars and Tommy started to speed down the street. "HAHA I'M SUCH A CHAD," Tommy just yelled as he was speeding off down the road. He just started leaning into the steering wheel and I was pushing back against my chair. 
     "TOMMY SLOW DOWN," My voice yelled over the roaring engine that for sure was interrupting people. He took his foot off the gas pedal dodging cars and then once we were far enough ahead of everyone, he pulled the emergency hand brake and I instantly got thrown forward. The emergency seatbelt stopped me before I got flown forward. Even though I didn't get thrown forward, I flew up just enough that my body left my chair. "THOMAS FUCKING INNIT WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR," Seriously what is he doing. 
     "Ha scared ya bitch, you know I wouldn't crash when you're in the car. I'm too cool for that," As soon as Tommy said that he pulled out some 8-bit looking-glasses from god who knows where. My mouth opened about to say something but decided it would be best to sit there and go over your will. Tommy finally got into the correct lane and clicked on the blinker, he took the softest turn to the right and started to move down the road at normal speed. He just looked over and smirked at the smallest bit of his braces poking out.
      My eyes wandered down around the street looking for the big M sign, my eyes went to the left and saw it come into sight. The smile on my face slowly started to grow the closer we got. Tommy merged onto the turn lane, and he turned on the blinker with a click. With a smooth glide, he turned into the busy parking lot. We were one car behind the speaker and me and Big T were talking about what we want when I brought up a really good point, "Tommy we are supposed to cause mass destruction like the college students we are, but how can we cause chaos in the drive through"
"Shit, I didn't think this one through"
"Clearly. We also can't leave now since there is a car behind us"
     Tommy took a quick glance out of the rear-view mirror before the car in front of us moves away from the mic and moved forward in line. He moved the car forward just a little bit and rolled down the window. "Ey mate, can I get 2 big macs and 2 happy meals," he forcefully made his accent even more British. 
     Surprisingly another male British accent came through, "Finally another fucking brit in this bloody American town." Tommy and I started giggling uncontrollably trying to keep quiet so they couldn't hear us through the mic.
      "I'm not British I love guns and am very amEricAn," he struggled to keep his fake American accent on. There was more than one voice on the other end giggling on the other end of the speaker. 
     The speaker rang out again, "I am als- American. Hahahaha, I love guns and politics." This time though the speaker cut out halfway through the sentence and the cars started to move ahead. Tommy moved the car forward again. Now we are only one car behind the window where you get your food and pay.
     "This is going to be fucking gold," Tommy half-whispered to me for absolutely no reason at all. I just nodded back at him. We sit there for a mere 30 seconds before there we moved forward again. The window opens to two people staring at us. "Hello, fellow Americans."
      The people just stood there standing at us. They both had brown hair, one was wearing a red beanie and one with a headband. "So, you're a definitely real Americans," the shorter one with the beanie spoke with a higher pitch voice than the other. 
     "Nice car ya got their mate. You must get real bitches in there, especially from looking snazzy in that suit," the other one just randomly spoke. They both leaned their heads over the little ledge and finally saw me. "Oh my god I'm sorry I'm not calling ya a bitch I was just saying he has a nice car," the instant regret in his voice was easy to distinguish from the normal laid-back voice he just used.
      "Bill what the fuck you don't say that to customers," the shorter person hit the boy on the back of the head. The boy just let out a low "OW" then ran back into the kitchen for god who knows what. "I'm sorry about that prick he doesn't know how to keep his mouth shut. Just the other day he was arguing over crickets up the ass. Fuck, that probably also wasn't a good thing to bring up"
      This was one hell of a McDonald's trip. The one I was looking for. "You guys are fine we did come here to cause chaos in the first place, but you guys caused it for us," I spoke to the employee with the nametag "Aimsey". 
    The person turned around to the kitchen and yelled, "BILL YOU'RE HOLDING UP THE LINE." Right after that they turned back and said, "Sorry bout that." 
     The bandana boy came running back with a bag and two happy meals in hand. Honestly, it was surprising how much he was carrying. I pulled out my purse and took out a hundred that I had saved in case I needed it, and these employees needed a good tip. I slightly nudged Tommy and slipped the 100 into his hand and he just nodded at me. Tommy and Bill exchanged the items and before they could deny it (which looked like was about to happen) Tommy yelled, "KEEP THE CHANGE, BRITISH DUDE OUT."
     He just slammed on the gas food in hand and my head flew back to hit the headrest of my seat, "TOMMY STOP FUCKING DOING THAT." We both were laughing as he made the car be heard from miles, I couldn't even hear my own laugh. 
      Tommy flew out of the parking lot, pulled a hand break and drifted into the lane. At this point, he rolled down all the windows and was just speeding at that point. He couldn't go too fast since we are in a residential area but once we get where I think we are going he goes however fast he wants. Big T handed me all the food and put it on my lap so that I could snack on something, and we can get to wherever he is planning to go. At this point I'm not sure of the plan, are we doing the sneak on the yacht thing or not? By all means, I don't care, but me and he look too good to waste.
      He turned on the radio set to a random rock station and we just sat there jamming it out. "-Teenagers scare, the living shit out of me," we sang in unison, "They can care less, as long as someone will bleed." Finally, I looked at the road continuing to sing Tommy just now got onto the exit to get on the highway. The exit was pretty short, so we were there in a mere minute or so based on hour speed. As soon as we merged all hell broke loose. 
     Tommy sped up a lot once we got on the highway, so I look over to see the speedometer at 115 and still going up. By all means, I trust Tommy but when someone is driving fast and it's not me it kinda puts me on edge. He did have the biggest smile on his face though. Which made me calm down, if he trusts himself, I trust him. 
     As we sped down the highway, we got various honks from multiple cars. Even an eighteen-wheeler was honking at us. Both me and Tommy were just vibing down the highway until a loud obnoxious noise came on. Red and blue lights flooded the car and sirens were the only things we could hear. My heart started beating faster as the sirens got louder. Tommy was now going at the normal speed hoping with everything he can that they were looking for someone else and not him. He shot a glance at me and spoke shakenly, "I- I think that might be for us."
     As soon as he finished a loud microphone shouted out, "Police Department Black and Y/f/c Camaro pull over." I just looked back at Tom and then glanced at the rear-view mirror as the police were right behind us slowing down as Tommy pulled over. The second Tommy was completely stopped and in the park my heart spiked. Tommy put his hands in his lap shakily, so I took one and said in a soothing voice, "Tommy we'll be fine, just be careful about what you say and let me do the talking."
     He let out a little nod as an officer knocked on the window. The hand I wasn't holding rolled down the window and the officer stared at both of us, I think. He was wearing sunglasses. "Do you guys know why I stopped you?" Both Tommy and I shook our heads no. "Do you know how fast you were going?" he was now speaking specifically to Tommy.
     "No officer," Tommy spoke. Don't admit anything, and he was doing amazing at it. My hand tightened in his as the officer just nodded. He pulled out a ticket book and was about to write in it before he stopped again. 
"May I see your license?"
     Tommy just nodded and reached into his back pocket. He was searching around for a second before he let go of my hand and searched his other pocket. Then he looked at me and I could physically see him shake. Oh shit. He doesn't have his wallet. "I don't seem to have it on me officer," His voice went into a higher octave.
     "Can you please get out of the car," The officer spoke in an oh so laid-back tone. Tommy unbuckled his seatbelt and pulled the handle for the door. He was now standing outside the car with his hands behind his back. Shit he was getting arrested. Anxiety started to make me play with my hands. 
     A sudden urge and determination came over me and I also pushed open my door, "Sir this is my car, and I also don't have the paperwork with me. Also, I told him to go that fast so you have to arrest me also. If you don't I don't have my license on me so you have to arrest me for not driving with a license." 
     Throughout the whole thing Tommy was just shaking his head "no" over and over again, "Officer, she isn't mentally sane right now please don't arrest her. She had nothing to do with this except be in the passenger seat." The officer didn't respond to Tommy at all and just started pushing him to the back of the car. 
     Once he was secure in the back of the car the officer came over to you, "I'm sorry ma'am about your boyfriend but-"      "Listen up asshole arrest me now or I'm going to speed right in front of the goddamn police department and shove those sunglasses up your ass"
    "Put your hands behind your head. You're getting arrested, be happy with yourself," He spoke as he took your hands and trapped them in the cold metal cuffs. As soon as they were locked in place, he brought me to the other side of the car from Tommy and opened the door for me. As soon as I sat down Tommy nudged me in the side. A single thought flooded my mind why does everyone assume a boy and a girl are hanging out they are automatically dating?
     "You idiot really got yourself arrested too. But what about your hair," the last bit of his sentence sounded weird. What's wrong with my hair? All I have in is a clip and some hair spray. Wait a clip, this man really wants to get our handcuffs off. I looked him in the eyes and let out a little nod. I got my hands as far up my back as I could and looked up in the sky to get the back of my head closer to my hands. My fingers were searching through the limited amount of hair they could reach before something hard was felt. Bingo. I pinched onto at and pulled it out. Personally, I don't know how to do this so it's up to Tommy. I turned to the side a little and Tommy did the same so that our backs were facing each other, and I passed the hair pin to his hands. We had to stay very quiet so the officer doesn't turn around. Me and Tommy were sitting normally again and he was digging around the lock hoping for it to open up. The officer made a quick glance back but then put his eyes on the road. The faintest click was heard and I knew he got one of his off he kept his hands behind his back and did the other one. A couple of moments later he got his other one. He's keeping his hands behind his back to make sure the officer doesn't notice anything. He elbowed me a little bit to signify that he was going to do mine now so we went to the back to back position again. I hope my dress/suit doesn't get into the way of him doing it. I feel him grab my wrist and start working on the handcuff.
     What felt like hours was only 15 minutes and he got both of them off, and perfect timing because we were back in town and pulling up to the police station. The officer stopped the car and put it in park then opened his door letting a gust of wind hit us before it was closed. Then he opened Tommy's door. The second Tommy stood up with his handcuffs in hands he slyly said, "Here ya go." I came out right after him and handed him mine also. He looked in shock for a second before putting a hand on both of our shoulders and leading us through the doors (A/n keep in mind I've never been to prison so this might not be right). We approached the desk and the officer said something to the lady but I was too busy thinking about who's going to pick up my car to pay attention. 
     The officer proceeded to lead us past the desk and into a room with a few desks and a set of bars. He led us to a random desk then started to get all of out information from us. Once we were done answering questions like 'age' 'gender' 'full names' 'current residents' etc he led us to other side of the room there was 2 other doors, in which I'm guessing we are going in one of them to get our mug shots. The officer took his hands off of our shoulders and grabbed some keys off his belt, unlocking the door. Once he pushed it open there was a bench of people. all men, sat next to the background of the mugshot. I felt a hand push against my back and guide me into the room. The door slammed behind both me and Tommy making everyone look up. Tommy grabbed onto my wrist and pulled me with him to sit on the bench. He had to sat next to a guy with a brown scruffy beard and brunette hair he was talking to the other people on the bench saying he didn't steal the song. Everyone was calling him CS so that must've been his nickname. "Hey Tom, how you doing,"  I asked him trying to calm him down.
     He just let out a sigh and spoke, "I would be completely fine with this ordeal if you weren't stuck in the middle of it. I'm sorry for recklessly driving please forgive me"
     "Tom Simons look at me," I stood up, "It's not your fault we didn't know there was an officer near us, and we will look amazing in our mug shot." 
      His hopes got higher as the mug shot line got smaller and smaller. Hopefully me and Tommy would only have to have us get picked up and not have to go to real court. Tommy was called up through a speaker system to stand in front of the measured-out wall. There was one way glass with a big camera sticking out through the glass. He stood up and walked over to the window where there was a little opening with a counter there laid a plate with a random string of numbers and on top it said 'Tom Simons'. Tommy hesitantly took it and stood in front of the wall with the height measurement. There was a quick white light on his smiling face (I mean come on we've got to look good in our mugshots) then he turned to the side with the same exact smile. Once another white flash was present he went back to the little slit in wall and gave back his plait. 
     The door opens on the other side of the room to see a new officer she had tan skin and darker hair. She led Tommy back out of the room from a different door we didn't enter. Next it was me. Ah yes I was all dressed up and ready to go to a yatch party, but I get arrested instead. Ironic isn't it. I stood up and walked over and grabbed my metal plate. After grabbing it I stood straight in front of the height measurement and forced a smile on my face. My eyes were in the middle of the camera when the flash went off. I went blind for a moment before I turned to my side and got a side view mugshot. 
     After putting the metal plate back, the same lady was opening the door for me. We both walked in silence, the woman a little bit Infront. She led me past various doors all with the same sickening grey color, the same as the wall. At the end of the hall there was surprise, another grey door. When she opened the door there was a table with a couple of chairs and a phone that looks like it would be on a teacher's desk. Tommy was sitting on one of the chairs in silence. I walk over and sit in the chair next to him. 
     The guard spoke, "You both have a phone call, you guys have been let off with a warning. Although both of you will have to be picked up. I will be outside the door so when you guys are done, you need to sign a few papers." 
Tommy and I just stared at each other. We both have a call, but we only need one. If he picks up of course. "I am honestly so glad we didn't get into too much trouble," Tommy sighed in relief, "We should call Phil, I mean he will be mad at us. But we looked hella good in our mug photos." I let out a sigh and nodded towards him. Tommy dialed a random string of numbers. What would Phil think? He always said we would get arrested one day. Welp this will be a great story to tell everyone. My eyes closed to just rest my eyes from the bright luminescent light. Tommy just murmured into a phone for a couple of minutes. So, he did pick up. I wasn't paying attention to their conversations at all until Tommy started bursting out laughing, then he just slammed the phone back onto the phone deck and hung up the phone. He continued laughing and I sat there confused. "We are so fucked."
    "I'm not surprised. Ya ready for a 3-hour lecture from someone who also has been arrested multiple times for speeding?" Tommy just laughed. The guard knocked on the door and I yelled, "Come In"
    Tommy and I received the papers and have been working on it for the last 20 minutes. The whole time we were acting like we were in school. Cracking jokes to each other, talking about our uneaten food in my car in the middle of the highway, and just nerding out in general. Most of the questions were health related stuff, it was almost like we were at the hospital. We even drew penises on our hands with our pens. How are we 19? After a while we finished so we were just reenacting a YouTube video we watched forever ago. "Awwwwww shucks" I yelled. "What's up mother shuckers" Tommy spoke with an American accent. 
The door slammed open.
"You two fuckers got arrested"
43 notes · View notes
anakirui · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media
poorly made meme by yours truly. i may consider these two the scum of the earth sometimes but it does not stop them from being my favorite characters on the dsmp, nor does it stop me from crying whenever i write angst about them-
25 notes · View notes
mcmoth · 3 years
Text
What's up suckers. Here's my topic of tonight:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
ID under the cut:
[ID: a poorly made PowerPoint presentation.
First slide: "Why the next DSMP arc should be TAZ balance." Attached to the meme of "another great idea from ME!!, but instead it's "Another wacky powerpoint from ME!!"
Second slide: "Dream SMP is known to have arcs reminiscent of other media. Like the famous musical hamilton, or the one with the bombs in high school, or crossing animals! And therefore, I think it's time for a new one. A fresh one...." (attached are 3 memes - Tubbo's mc character running around with a nuke, with black bars and bold text, above saying the letter "B", and below "BOMB??"; a picture of Jason Dean from the musical Heathers with the caption "Wilbur Soot"; and a picture of Tommyinnit's mc character crying cartoonist tears, with the words "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT", with the caption "Tombeeinnit crying during his angst. He's crying guys".
Third slide: "Reasons TAZ balance should be next arc:
Let’s get this out of the way: I love TAZ.
All this afterlife and Wilbur talk and the fact that Wilbur knows about the end of the universe and the existentialist of it all makes me think of John the vore boy and his hunger..... *blushing emoji*
The vibes.... Do y’all remember the vibes of taz??? The found family?? The unified fighting spirit against the worst of odds??? We need that. I demand it. >:( /nm
Hmmm... Amnesia plots..... Where have we heard that before?? Huh,,,, /rh"
Fourth slide: "In conclusion:
Please *pleading emoji* pwetty please,,... Pwease I need the found family and existentialist discussions.... :”(( *breaks down sobbing* *breaks down sobbing* *breaks down sobbing* *breaks down sob", attached is a picture of a badly drawn emoji, it's hands together, pleading "please...." and a picture of Mob from the Mob Psycho 100 Manga, staring forward with a raised hand, silent, slightly menacingly.
Fifth slide: a picture of Tails from the Tails Gets Trolled comic series. He is looking tired and disheveled and saying "ok i'm gonna go back to sleep now good night", and below is the caption, in a red font, "it is 6am mates. Ily <3". end ID]
100 notes · View notes
poorlydrawnmcyt · 3 years
Photo
Tumblr media
the foolsamponk experience
2K notes · View notes
poorlydrawnmcyt · 3 years
Text
Tumblr media
2K notes · View notes