Hi! Firstly I love your blog, I check it as soon as I get a notification for it!! Secondly, I wanted to ask what you mean when you say “Brand Kapoor Khan?”
I mean that Kareena and Saif are fully aware that Taimur strengthens their brand as a family. Saif’s career isn’t going very well, Kareena is doing okay but has passed her ~prime~ (ugh), and Taimur has given them renewed popularity. They could have kept him private, but they deliberately didn’t. Those paparazzi strolls, holding him on the balcony like he’s Simba in The Lion King, all the posts on his every expression by unofficial photographer and PR rep Aunty Karisma...that’s on purpose lol his popularity is beneficial to them and will keep them relevant for years to come.
I’m not saying this as a form of judgment, it’s just a fact. I would not be surprised if he ends up in front of a camera in some ad campaign or something. Now that celebrity kids are a thing in India, there will always come a point where you have to ease them into public life, because people are interested in them and you can’t keep them locked in the house forever. But when they’re babies, that’s not the case. Most children are not shown off as much as Taimur is (the only other one I can think of is AbRam). That’s not an accident, they’re building up their family brand and Taimur is helping them do it. It might be distasteful to some people, but it’s a very effective form of self-promotion that is more or less harmless (for the time being, at least...who knows what affect all this publicity will have on these kids when they grow up).
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Once upon a time, there was a great man named Hawks, a man who valiantly carries his agency on his shoulders and takes his employees under his great big red wings (which are great, btw). One Monday morning, Hawks walks into his building to see his PR representatives unfortunately deprived of sleep. A tragedy. Ivan is chewing paper, Bunny is struggling to keep her claws from the coffee machine, and Simba is shitposting out of habit like a zombie.
So, the legend himself, Hawks—kind, caring, compassionate Hawks—decides to rescue his precious staff whose faces are covered by the mountains of paperwork (thanks, Tanaka from accounting).
Hawks puts his hands on his hips and surveys room trashed by stray paper. He whistles, and it sounds like a harp an angel plays. “Man, Tanaka really crunched the wrong numbers here,” he says. The dashing young hero moves to release his reps from guweh;guhegfq;u4;8oyt2882579826583yfhi--
(Enough of these lies, Hawks!)
The truth of what happened, as narrated by PR rep Bunny:
The Winged Headass: Hawks stumbled into his overworked PR Team's office an hour later than agreed with a half-melted frappe in one hand and a suspiciously large bouquet of flowers in the other, soot-stained face as guilty as ever.
"Guys," he called out hesitantly, "how much trouble am I going to be in if I started a new fried chicken meme? Hypothetically, of course."
Rep Simba, the only reason Hawks hasn't been banned from Twitter in 240 characters or less, raised her head from the keyboard. "Hypothetically," she drawled, "I'm going to personally see to it that you're banned from every KFC in a fifty mile radius for the next month."
"Hypothetically, I'm going to take two weeks off, paid and let you handle this yourself." Rep Ivan, dead tired to the point of delirium in the form of chewing up complaint forms- many, many complaint forms- didn't even bother to open her eyes.
Rep Bunny, currently breaking an astounding all time record of two days without caffeine, yet somehow still twitching, fixed Hawks with a glare. "Hypothetically," she said, "I'm going to wreck your shit."
Hawks cleared his throat awkwardly, like the awkward dumbass he is, and gently set the bouquet between the three overworked saints and his southern-fried dumbassery. "Well, then I didn't start a new meme about fried chicken being a euphemism for sex."
Rep Bunny didn't bother to look at the horror on sweet, pure Rep Simba's face as her laptop started pinging with notifications. She nailed him in the head with a chipped Ryuuku mug.
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