#pre-three dads and a hurricane

[onlyonewoman]

It's hard to shake it off, the feeling of being in debt. Logically, Xue Yang knows that's not how relationships work, at least not to the level he's used to and has tried to let go of. Knowing the mechanisms of said mindtrap, unfortunately doesn't take away the facts here. Like how Zichen is so vastly different from him in all the ways that are to Xue Yang's disadvantage.

#songxuexiao #songxue #xue yang #song lan #the untamed #fanfic #ao3 #ao3feed #alternate universe #modern au #pre three dads and a hurricane

[pftones3482]

Sometimes Stupid

Commission for @randomfandomfan from one of their many prompts they gave me. Took forever bc of work and life and also???? Now I have a cat??? So that's fun. But this was fun to write. Read it here on AO3

Set post TLO and pre HOO (and a little bit post HOO). Under a cut for length.

~~

Contrary to popular belief, Leo Valdez was not stupid.

He was an idiot, at times – for instance, maybe running away from his seventh (fifteenth? He’d really lost track at this point) foster home wasn’t the best decision he could have made, especially given that it was the middle of summer and oh, also, hurricane season. And okay, maybe he should’ve taken more with him than a single change of clothes, a box of Ritz crackers, a pocketknife, and a water bottle that had definitely seen better days, but he was in a rush, okay?

But he wasn’t stupid.

When he ran away from his foster homes, Leo tended to stay away from people where he could. And if he had to be around them, he cleaned up, smiled brightly, “Yes ma’am”ed and “Yes’sir”ed to an obnoxious point, and lied his pants off. People were less likely to call the police on a Hispanic kid if they thought he was just a darling little angel waiting for mom at the grocery store, and the last thing he needed was the cops in his business.

Not that it hadn’t happened, of course. He’d dealt with cops of all kinds – nice cops, bad cops, black cops, white cops (WAY too many of those, in his opinion), the occasional cop who would speak Spanish with him, cops who were just there to write a report and move on with their days – cops.

He tried to stay away from them.

Which meant sticking to beaches and forests, lakes and campgrounds, middle of nowhere places with no people for miles. Leo was good at disappearing. Hiding.

But there were always times when he needed an adult. When he needed to hitchhike, or when he needed food to the point of near passing out. Once for serious medical attention. There was a system to what adults you could trust.

Never cops. You could never trust the cops, no matter what naïve white parents thought. Leo had been in cuffs enough to know that was false.

You also couldn’t usually trust priests. They meant well, sure, but they always ended up calling the authorities in the end. That, or they tried to convert Leo to Catholicism, and while one of those encounters had ended with a swiped bottle of watered-down red wine and a night that made him vow to never drink again, he wasn’t trying to contact the church.

(THAT night, Leo would say he had been stupid. He could admit that)

Homeless people were usually okay. While a lot of them were very suspicious of everyone, almost every homeless person he’d ever met would point him in the direction of food, water, free showers, free clothes, or a library (his saving grace during the heat of the summer and the cold of the winter). The times when he came across gay homeless people were when he felt safest – they especially never pressed him about his background. Ironic, really, that he felt safer with strangers on the street than his foster homes.

Moms were sometimes okay. Especially if they were Hispanic, or black, or just anything but white. They, at least, wouldn’t call the cops on him. But they were also hit or miss – sometimes they helped in way of a meal, or a new bottle of water. One mom even took him to the store and got him new socks and underwear (he had cried that night). But other moms rushed him away from their precious babies. Some moms called him ungrateful for the “space he had.”

Dads were a never. Leo never went to men if he could help it, even if they had children with them. He didn’t trust them as far as he could throw them, and that wasn’t very far.

But it was hurricane season. And he was on the coast. And it was downpouring, and he was starving, and the only people he had seen for miles were a white couple, a man and a woman, standing on the porch of a somewhat rundown shack that Leo would’ve probably thought was abandoned if he hadn’t seen them there.

The man was tall, peppered hair that was shifting more to salt, with a rough beard and a pair of glasses perched on his nose. The woman at his side was short, probably Leo’s height, with dark curly hair and vibrantly blue eyes. It was streaked with gray, but she was, admittedly, a very pretty woman. Something about her smile put Leo at ease.

He clutched his backpack tighter in his fist and stumbled over the sand towards the shack, ankles rolling uncomfortably on the wet ground. He was sure he looked atrocious, sure that the moment they spotted him, they’d shriek and cuss him out and lock the door.

But then he coughed, hard, his shoulders shaking, and the woman whipped her head around. He watched her eyes widen, watched her tug at the man’s sleeve, and then she was bolting – barefoot, Leo noticed – down the steps and over to him.

He flinched when she wrapped an arm over his shoulders, jolting out of her grip more from habit than anything else. She froze, holding both hands up and relaxing her stance. “Hey, honey. It’s okay. It’s okay.”

Somewhere deep down, Leo’s brain was scoffing at the patronizing words. But on the surface, he focused on the words, and then sharpened his eyes onto the man as he approached, phone in hand. “I-I c-can’t-”

The woman looked back, down at the phone, and her shoulders stiffened. “Paul, put the phone away, please.”

Her voice held an intonation that Leo couldn’t decipher, but the man – Paul – instantly shut the phone off and pocketed it. The moment it was gone, Leo let his shoulders loosen, and he looked at the woman anxiously. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I-I just…”

“Hey.”

Her arm was more cautious this time, sliding around Leo’s shoulders with a pace that would let him move if he wanted. He didn’t, just let it happen, and then the woman was easing him over the sticky sand and up the steps of the shack, Paul close behind them. He stopped at the door, pushing back hard against the woman’s guiding grip. “I don’t want to ruin your house,” he managed.

The woman’s laugh was…well, to be perfectly honest, it made Leo feel warm. Like she could never hurt him.

Those are usually the most dangerous people, his mind tried to reason with him.

“Sweetheart, it’s just a rental cabin. Besides, I’ve had far worse than a little sand and water on my floors before.”

Before he could wonder at that sentence, she opened the door and nudged him inside. The second that Paul closed the door, the sound of the wind died down and the chill in the air evaporated. Leo realized he was shivering.

The woman’s hands were warm on his cheeks. “My name is Sally, hon. You are-?”

He usually gave a fake name, but – “Leo, ma’am.”

“Don’t you ma’am me,” she scoffed, her voice easy as she helped Leo to the couch. “I’m not that old, am I Paul?”

Paul put his hands up. “I abstain from answering.”

Sally scoffed and pressed a cool hand on Leo’s forehead. “Can I take your backpack, sweetheart?”

Something like panic flared in Leo’s chest, and Sally must have seen it, because she pulled her hand back and held it up. “I’m not moving it far, I just want Paul to dry everything out for you, okay?”

Fingers shaking, Leo shrugged off his bag – the one he’d been carrying for nearly three states – and passed it over to her. She took it like it was a priceless artifact, and handed it to Paul with more tenderness than Leo had ever seen given to an inanimate object. “I think my son might have left some clothes here while he was with us last week,” she said, voice soft. “He’s a little older than you, so some things might be big, but is it okay if we give you some of his clothes while we dry out yours?”

Leo swallowed around the lump in his throat. “Um. Yeah.”

She stood up and left with Paul, giving Leo a moment to be alone and take in the cabin around him.

It was old, but obviously well taken care of, with weathered planks of wood gracing the walls and the floor. He was in the living room, full of mismatched couches and chairs and a bookshelf stacked full of books and games. He didn’t see a TV in sight, but he wasn’t expecting to find one. He stood shakily, suddenly very aware of how wet he was getting the couch, and wrapped his arms around himself as he explored the rest of the main room.

The kitchen was small and cramped, but he could smell something full of tomatoes and spices in the oven that made his tastebuds water. He didn’t dare look for fear of getting caught, so he stepped away and into the tiny dining area. There was sand on the floor, spread thin and fine, and it was such a small thing, but it made Leo relax even more – Sally meant it when she said she didn’t care about him ruining her floors.

But she and Paul had been gone for a while, and Leo wasn’t stupid, okay? It didn’t matter how well intentioned someone was, they always thought they knew better, and if they were gone too long, it meant they were trying to decide for him. So he crept towards the hallway they’d vanished to, praying that he didn’t step on a squeaky board. Old homes always had them in the most inconvenient places.

“-not answering?” he picked up Paul’s voice saying.

“No,” Sally said, a sigh in her voice. “He did say he and Annabeth were on a date, but I didn’t expect them to be in Paris of all places. How did they even-?”

“Can you get ahold of Chiron?”

Not the police, then, Leo reasoned, unless they knew an officer by that name. He leaned a little closer.

“No – I try not to call the camp unless I need to. Phone lines and all that, you know?”

Paul huffed. “I know. And Rachel is at art camp, right?”

“Yup,” Sally said, and Leo heard a sound like a blowing raspberry. “He clearly isn’t aware of anything, Paul. He’s terrified.”

“Probably a runaway,” Paul hummed, and Leo flinched at the damning statement. “Met a couple kids like that teaching.”

He looked like a teacher. You couldn’t trust most teachers either, Leo had learned. They were just like priests. Tried their best, but they always inevitably called someone.

“What did you do? Who did you call?” Sally asked, and Leo stiffened. Here it comes, his brain taunted.

“No one,” Paul said.

Leo blinked, taking a slight step back. What?

“Kids don’t run away for no reason, Sal. Especially not kids like him. Perce taught me that. I mean, maybe in my early days of teaching, I might have called the authorities, but ever since this summer I…how could I risk that? Even before then, I mean…the stories I’ve heard from some of these kids I’ve talked to. We don’t know anything about him. If he ran away, all this way, in this weather? It was bad, love.”

Leo’s throat ached.

He’d never, the whole time he’d been in foster care, ever heard an adult admit that they were wrong to call the authorities on him. Never heard an adult take his perspective into account, especially without even knowing him. Never had an adult admit that his life could be anything other than ideal.

He took another step back and oh shit, there it was, the cursed piece of wood in every old house to ever exist. He cussed under his breath and ducked his head as Sally stepped into the hallway. He refused to look up at her. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “You were just gone for a while a-and I thought you might be calling someone.”

No verbal response. Instead, a soft bundle of fabric was pressed into Leo’s hands. He startled, gripping onto the clothing, and looked up at Sally and Paul with wide eyes. Paul shook his head. “We’re not calling anyone, son. Not if you don’t want us to. But we do ask that you get cleaned up, before you catch pneumonia.”

Sally tilted her head towards the door across the hall. “Let me know when you’re done, I’ll toss your clothes in the dryer. Paul was just finishing up dinner when you came along. Do you like lasagna?”

Leo’s mouth watered at the thought of eating any kind of food that wasn’t stale crackers and canned tuna. “Yes ma’am.”

“What’d I say about that ma’am nonsense?” Sally scolded.

Leo ducked his head, trying to press down the tears. “Yes, miss,” he chuckled.

Sally laughed as Paul headed for the kitchen. “It’s a start, love.”

~~

Sally’s son’s clothes were soft, well loved. They smelled like sea water and lavender detergent, and though the t-shirt was a gaudy orange with letters so faded that Leo couldn’t read them, he sank into the fabric with a sigh. Sally had also passed him a pair of sweatpants, and Leo hoped that her son wouldn’t be mad if he ever found out that some random foster kid had borrowed them.

If he was anything like Sally, though, Leo had the feeling he’d like him.

His hair was still wet, but this time from a shower, and Leo couldn’t remember the last time he’d gotten to stand under an actual stream of hot water without people literally timing him to make sure he didn’t take too long. He stood in front of the mirror, sighing a little at how skinny he’d gotten. He’d always been small – being skinny only made him more of a punching bag for the bigger foster kids. His hair, untamed from weeks of running, hung in his eyes, and he wondered briefly if Sally might have a hair tie he could borrow.

He left the bathroom and crept into the dining room, where Sally was setting the table and Paul was pulling one of the most beautiful lasagnas he’d ever seen out of the oven.

“-texted me, said they’d be back tomorrow morning. He offered to come back sooner,” Sally was saying as Leo stood in the doorway, “but I know he and ‘beth haven’t really gotten to go on any non-monstrous dates recently.”

She blinked when she saw him standing there, and her smile softened into something warm and inviting. “Come on, hon. Paul was just getting dinner out.”

Maybe it was the malnourishment, or Paul’s cooking skills, or Leo’s exhaustion, or a combination of the three, but Leo had never tasted such good Italian food in his life. He downed one, two, three pieces and a full salad before he finally slowed down. To his relief, neither Paul nor Sally gave him any grief about how many pieces he took. Honestly, he thought he watched Paul actively make his slices bigger than theirs.

They’d clearly been talking about their son when he came in the room. This guy was in Paris, on a date with his girlfriend, and he was coming back tomorrow. Leo wondered just how rich this family was – the dad was a teacher, but Sally hadn’t said what she did, and Leo was a little afraid to ask.

When Paul brought out a pie for dessert, Leo almost cried. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had any dessert fancier than a stolen Ding Dong from a corner store. Paul definitely gave him a larger slice than them, and as he ate it, Sally poked at her own pie.

“Leo, we’re not going to pry,” she started, gentle. “Your story is yours, and I know how tricky it can be to share yourself and your past with new people.”

The sad smile Paul shot her didn’t go unnoticed by Leo, and he internally bristled at the thought that this wonderful mom in front of him could understand anything about how he felt, because that meant that she’d gone through shit she didn’t deserve. He said nothing, though, just nodded.

Sally eyed her pie thoughtfully, stabbing a blackberry that had escaped the crust. “But I feel like…well, I feel as though my son especially can relate to how you’re feeling, or at least some of it. If you’d be willing to wait for him to come home, maybe we can figure some things out together.”

Leo felt lost. He’d been lost a lot before, but this was the first time it was mental and not physical. “What?”

Sally looked up, seeming to realize that she’d baffled him. “I mean…”

She looked at Paul, and Leo looked between the two of them, tightening his grip on his fork. They were having a silent conversation. Leo hated when adults did that. “You mean you want to wait until I’m asleep so you can call the cops o-or foster services or-or just wait until your son gets back so he can tell me to get out.”

He shoved his chair back from the table, tears prickling at his eyes. Every time. Every time. He always got his hopes up, always thought he’d found the perfect people, people who got it, and every fucking time, he-

Hands settled on his shoulders, and he ripped away, scowling at Sally. Her eyes were sad, and Leo felt an unwelcome stab of guilt in his chest. “That is not what we were suggesting, ever, honey. I would never call foster services, first of all. They’re atrocious, especially for kids of color.”

Leo jolted back. He’d never had a white woman actively acknowledge his race so bluntly before – it was usually partnered with some demeaning comment about “his kind” of people. He eyed Sally warily.

She lowered her hands, keeping them on her hips where he could see them. “Second, I’d never call the police either. You’re not a problem, and my son has had enough unfortunate encounters with them for me to…distrust them severely, to say the least.”

Her son had-?

“I just…we know a place. Where you would genuinely be safe, hon. No foster homes, no cops, with people who get it.”

She was lying. She had to be lying, no matter what Leo’s heart said. But she wasn’t going to let this go, and he knew it. So he sighed, fidgeted with his fingers. He wished he had something to build. “Okay. I’ll wait for your son to get home.”

Sally relaxed, and Leo gave her a thin smile.

He helped her and Paul clean up the kitchen, put away the leftover lasagna. Sat with them and did a puzzle, played a game of Clue with them. Fixed their radio for them, much to their surprise, and then watched with a small smile on his face as Paul and Sally danced around the living room together. They tried to get him to join, but he’d never been much of a dancer, so he declined.

They bid him goodnight around 11, and he shut the door of their son’s room, let the hours tick on.

At three am, he got up, changed back into his own clothes, left the borrowed ones folded neatly on the foot of the bed. He took a flashlight from the bedside table and slid it into his backpack, stepped out of the bedroom and avoided the squeaky floorboard.

The tool kit from fixing the radio was still on the coffee table, and he picked it up with only the slightest feelings of guilt. Went through the cabinets and pulled out sleeves of crackers, a box of granola, eyed the leftover lasagna with a sad gaze. He found a roll of toilet paper under the sink, a bottle of hand sanitizer in a junk drawer.

He paused by the game of Clue, left out on the table from their match, and let his fingers trace over it sadly. His gut screamed at him to leave. His heart screamed at him to stay. He wasn’t stupid.

Leo had always trusted his gut.

He pocketed the candlestick piece and turned for the door, flinching the second his eyes landed on Sally.

Her hair was done up in a braid, her pajamas wrinkled, and the moon shining through the window reflected the sadness in her eyes. Leo opened his mouth, but couldn’t find it in him to speak – the lump was back.

She stepped forward and he shut his eyes, expecting a lecture. Instead, her hand cupped his cheek. Her other hand pressed into his, and he gasped as he felt the telltale touch of money in his fingers. He looked down at the wad of cash – he couldn’t see how much it was, but he knew that he didn’t deserve it. He looked up at her, panicking. “I can’t-”

“Stay, I know,” she whispered, and that wasn’t what he’d been planning to say, and he knew that she knew that. “I understand, Leo. I understand, sweetie.”

The sob slipped out before he could stop it, and Sally’s eyes softened. She bent at the hip, pressing a soft kiss to his curls. “When you end up meeting my son,” she murmured, “come visit, okay?”

Leo had no idea what that meant, but he nodded, if only to appease her. “I’m sorry,” he croaked.

She squeezed his shoulder. “Nothing to be sorry for, honey. Be safe.”

Sally watched him go, watched him shut the door behind him, and he looked down at the money in his hands with a choked feeling in his chest. It was more than he’d held in his entire life. He couldn’t take it, but he knew she’d be upset if he didn’t. And if there was one thing Leo refused to do, it was make Sally more upset than he already had.

So he pocketed it and, with an aching heart, stepped off the porch of the cabin. The storm from earlier had died down, and, fingers tight on his backpack straps, he started making his way up the beach.

~~

Percy was bouncing up and down at the entrance to Camp Half Blood, fingers curled around Annabeth’s hand. “Do I look okay?” he asked for probably the thousandth time that morning.

Piper rolled her eyes. “Percy, it’s your mom. She doesn’t care what you look like.”

Percy shot her a mock glare. “I haven’t seen her in over a year, McClean, sue me.”

“You look fine, Perce,” Annabeth laughed, kissing his cheek. “She’s gonna mostly care that you’re alive.”

“Okay but this tattoo-”

“Sorry, you vanished on me for over a year, crossed the globe, and you got a TATTOO?” came a very scolding, very obviously Mom Voice, and Leo snickered, turning to see who was about to absolutely whoop Percy’s ass.

And he stumbled on his own feet, lips parting as Sally (Sally Jackson, his unhelpful brain mocked) appeared at the top of the hill. Her hair was a little grayer than it had been when Leo met her, her hips a little wider, but her smile was the same, her laugh as Percy launched himself at her the same peal of delight Leo remembered on his toughest nights, and when she caught his eye over Percy’s shoulder, her smile only widened.

Okay, so sometimes Leo Valdez was kind of stupid.

#percy jackson #pjo #leo valdez #heroes of olympus #pjo fanfic #my writing #sally jackson #paul blofis #percy jackson and the olympians #hoo

[stark-tony]

today is my 22nd birthday so i’m celebrating by reccing 22 of my favorite fics and giving my general thoughts about them.

atla

 i'm still here by owedbetter (77.7, T, zutara) "You see me."And somehow, that makes all the difference.

thoughts: One of the first zutara fics i ever read and it’s still one of my absolute favorites. The characterization of all of the characters is superb and the gradual development of zuko and katara’s relationship is amazing.

 such selfish prayers by andromeda3116 (47.6k, T, zutara)  Katara's ambition, so long set aside for the good of others, breaks free and sets fire to her soul. Or, Katara has a vision of her canon future, casts it aside, and becomes a world-changing politician instead.

thoughts: while this fic is a zutara fic, the majority of this fic is centered on katara and her helping rebuild the world after the war and it does an astounding job of portraying just that. and honestly this probably has my favorite characterization of katara i’ve ever read in a fic.

 Southern Lights by colourwhirled (501.8k, M, zutara) A world where the Avatar has disappeared from memory. Where Sozin’s Conquest was successful. Where the unsteady order of the empire is threatened as members of the royal family are picked off one by one and lines are slowly drawn in the sand.One last chance for peace forces an unlikely alliance between a homesick waterbender, a carefree Air Nomad, a runaway Earth Kingdom heiress, and the fire lord's inscrutable son. Together they must learn to shed old enmities and become the balance they seek to restore to the world.OR:The avatar has four heads.x[[Chapter 4: "And always, his eyes, cautiously watching her. Even when he thinks she isn’t looking. It drives her mad"]]

thoughts: when i say i was unable to put this fic down i genuinely mean that. like i’m pretty sure i was hooked from the very first chapter and i never looked back.

bnha

  stickers and stars by aloneintherain (1.9k, G, gen) “Aizawa, are you sure I’m the best person for this job? There are a lot more qualified people on campus. People who have been teachers for years, and—”As All Might spoke, Midoriya Izuku crawled the length of the couch, ducked under All Might’s arm, and made himself comfortable on his lap. All Might’s hands rose into the air, as though unsure of what to with his arms now that he had a toddler curled against his stomach like a cat seeking the warmth of its owner.“Um,” All Might said.

thoughts: is it not enough to say ‘baby deku’ and leave it at that?

 Butterfly by aconstantstateofbladerunner (198.8k, T, gen) The first over-night trip off campus since the training camp was supposed to be a fun break from more intense work back home. But between a bleak introduction to chaos theory, a chilly reception from the locals, and the looming threat of a villain attack, Izuku has too much on his mind to properly enjoy the fresh air. But those worries are a light breeze compared to the hurricane that accompanies what he finds on the outskirts of town.Or rather, what finds him.

thoughts: it’s incredibly well written and the horror aspect is so good. also the dad might in it is top tier.

villain eradication plan 5C: let them attack budding heroes mothers, wait appropriate time for mother to defeat them (3.4k, G, toshinko)  Targetting the civilian families of hero students should be cakewalk. Pity they decided to go with Inko first.Or the one where Inko accidentally defeats the League of Villains.

thoughts: this fic is basically inko accidentally being a badass and it’s as hilarious and awesome as it sounds

 see it all in bloom by aloneintherain (57.2k, T,  tododeku, kiribaku, momojirou, bullying) Midoriya looked over the occupants of the room with butter soft eyes. “We should do this again. Seeing everyone in one place … it’s like we’re back in school again.”Todoroki said, “It feels like a family reunion.”(Social media fic, counting down the five months to Class 1-A's ten year reunion.) 

thoughts: this series deals with social media + the lives of class 1a after they become pro heroes and it is amazing.

 remember from here on in by aloneintherain (8.1k, G, gen) Aizawa glances from All Might to Midoriya quickly. It sounds impossible—he’s never heard of a quirk that can be handed down like a family heirloom—but at the same time, it makes perfect sense. Midoriya’s inability to use his quirk at the start of the year. The strange, familial relationship between All Might and Midoriya. The slow malnourishment of All Might’s body, like his power was being siphoned away.“You’re …” Aizawa begins.“I’m All Might’s successor.” Midoriya’s proud but shaky voice rings clearly down the empty corridor.Aizawa finds out about One for All. 

thoughts: this fic deals with one for all being revealed to aizawa + midoriya getting more quirks and it is amazing

could i but teach the hundredth part by terra_incognita (5.2k, G, gen) Ito Matsu knows three things about her neighbor, Mr. Yagi: he's very skinny, he's very kind, and he has enough children to overthrow the Japanese government.Or:All Might is retired, but his former students keep coming up with reasons to visit. 

thoughts: this fic is so lovely and i adore it so much

mcu

 the talk by parkrstark (3.1k, pepperony) “Wait, man, what’re you doin’?” Rhodey asked, leaning forward.“Giving the kid his talk before he goes off to college.” Duh.Rhodey blinked. “At 3am when you’re probably too drunk to even spell your name, months before he actually has to leave?”“Yeah.”Rhodey blinked again. “Okay.”

thoughts: this fic is absolutely hilarious and poor peter is suffering throughout all of it

 call you home by Madelinedear (19k, G, pepperony) sometimes family is who you're born with.and sometimes family is a spider boy, a rich not-dad, and a kickass aunt.(or; tony, may, and peter find a place in each other's lives)

thoughts: to me, this fic is the tony may co-parenting fic. like i honestly don’t think that anything can ever top it

I Never Lived 'Til I Lived In Your Light by losingmymindtonight (38.4k, T, pepperony, character death)  As the world shifts to make space for Morgan Stark, everyone around her shifts, too. (As it turns out, this also includes Peter Parker's sleep schedule.) 

thoughts: this fic is both fluffy goodness and heartwrenching angst and it handles both beautifully.

 Lazarus, come forth by iron_spider (47.9k, T, pepperony) Tony's mind is a chaotic mess but he remembers the moment—remembers his death, remembers the red hot pain and Peter screaming, Rhodey rushing to his side. How he knew he’d never see Pepper again—but they’d fixed it. They’d fixed the world, erased the lost time, set things right—and the kid was back. The kid was crying, the kid hated him for doing what he did, but he was back. He was alive.Tony Stark was dead. But now he’s breathing again, trying to think, gasping, hands tracing the box surrounding him, covering him, suffocating him.He’s in a coffin. He’s under the ground. He’s under the fucking ground.(Tony Stark dies defeating Thanos. But then he comes back to life. He has to find out how, why, and how to live again. And how to deal with the changes in the people he's coming back to.)

thoughts: although this fic was written and finished pre-endgame but to me this fic is the fix-it fic for film.

Identity Saga by KitCat992 (400.7k, T, pepperony) An organically developed, platonic slow-burn of Avengers-fam dynamic with a heavy hand of Irondad & Spiderson. Throw in an overdose of whump, a couple of cunning villains and a big-bad hiding in the shadows, and you got yourself this hot mess.

thoughts: i just love the avengers dynamic in this series and the whump is medically accurate which is amazing.

college applications: the biggest meme by sagemb (3.3k, T, pepperony) Tony covered his face with both hands and screamed very gently. “Can I just bribe the school to let Peter in?"

thoughts: this series is absolutely hilarious and i love it

hp  

 The Changeling + Armistice Series  by Annerb (586.6k, M, hinny, rape) Ginny is sorted into Slytherin. It takes her seven years to figure out why.

thoughts: this fic is absolutely golden and i adore it so so much. the characters are so well written and the worldbuilding in this fic is fantastic and it actually has an original aspect of hogwarts (aka the parlor) that i practially consider to be canon at this point. also the depiction of slytherin house + house unity in this fic is just *chef’s kiss*

 boy with a scar by dirgewithoutmusic (208.7k, T, hinny, romione, jily)  A series of "what if" rewrites of Harry Potter, books 1-7. Cross-posted from tumblr (ink-splotch).

thoughts: every single one of these fics are exquisitely written and i wish that i could experience the beauty of this series again for the very first time.

  Hogwarts, to welcome you home by gedsparrowhawk (FaceChanger) (11.1k, G, ginny) “You understand, Professor,” Harry began, after a moment, “that I don’t have my N.E.W.T.s. I never even finished seventh year. Between everything, I never had a chance the first time around, and then afterwards there didn’t seem to be much point. Hermione argued for it, of course, but I was so tired of Britain. So technically, I am completely unqualified for the position.”“Quite a way to begin an interview, Mr. Potter,” McGonagall said, dryly.Or, three years after the war, Harry Potter becomes Hogwarts' newest Defense Against the Dark Arts professor.

thoughts: this is my favorite harry as dada professor i’ve ever read. no doubt about it

 And the Unethical Binding Contract by justafandomfollower (14.6k, G, gen) AU. What if the Triwizard Tournament took place in Harry's first year, not his fourth? 

thoughts: this fic is beautifully written and i love the relationship that forms between harry, cedric, krum, and fleur.

Regulus Black and the Way Things Changed: A Not!Fic by imaginary_golux (8.8k, T, wolfstar) What if Regulus Black, and not Severus Snape, ended up being the turncoat Potions Master of Hogwarts?A not!fic written in bullet points, ignoring the Deathly Hallows entirely because they annoy me.Beta by my immensely patient Best Beloved, Turn_of_the_Sonic_Screw, and by the delightful starbirdrampant.

thoughts: this fic may be ooc at some points but it’s so funny that that makes up for it

spn

 Broadway Musical by Griftings (12.5k, M, destiel) This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.Or, the romantic comedy where Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle are destined to get married, Castiel is given the task of playing matchmaker and fails terribly, the entire Heavenly Host becomes a sitcom audience, God warns against male pregnancy, and Jimmy Novak is incredibly unimpressed with angels in general.

thoughts: this fic is quite possibly the single most funniest thing i have ever read. like i was straight up cackling when i was reading some of the scenes.

  Down to Agincourt by seperis (1 million+, E, destiel) There is no such thing as a guarantee when it comes to war.The outcome's known. Why try? Return your rusty sword to battered sheath, bow your head and bend your stubborn knee. Why take the field when you cannot win the war? But Harry -- he went down to Agincourt.

--Harry Takes the Field by bratfarrar (AO3 link here.)

thoughts: this fic is an absolute work of art. the characterization dean and cas and all of the ocs is astounding the world building is immaculate and the writing is so detailed and in depth. a fair warning though to the first time reader as this fic can get very confusing at times but trust me it is worth it. 

#mcu recs #atla recs #hp recs #bnha recs #spn recs #my fic recs #bullying tw #rape tw

[outerbankspreferences]

Mistakes - Topper Thornton

Word Count: 2599

Warnings: death, swearing.

A/N: So I had to look up Topper’s mother’s name, and found out that apparently he is a professional surfer??? Did I miss this the countless times I’ve watched the show???

It was three day’s before Topper was getting married. It was going to be the biggest wedding on the island. Finally, the Thornton and Cameron family coming together. This wasn’t for business, or blending families, this was simply the will of love between two people. Topper and Sarah had been together, broke up and then got back together when they came home from college. Topper went to university out west, studying pre-law while Sarah stayed home and got her nursing degree. It was about five years they weren’t together. Topper moved back home to finish his degree and started to work for law firm on the island. To say that Cynthia and Ward were ecstatic was an understatement, they had already started making business plans around their kids’ marriage. Cynthia invested in Rose’s real-estate, and Rose helped her find a new office for her clinics. Cynthia also helped Sarah get a job at the hospital.

Nothing was being left behind. When Topper and Sarah announced their engagement to everyone the planning went crazy. The engagement party was held at the country club and no expense was spared. It was obvious Rafe wasn’t getting married any time soon, and Wheezie was still too young. Sarah loved planning all the events and getting the photo’s done. She was happy to being doing all of this with Topper by her side. At one point in time, Topper was over baring for Sarah, almost too invested in pleasing her. When they were in high school the relationship didn’t work because they were on two different pages, they had two different needs. When Sarah left for college, she had a couple boyfriends but nothing really lasting, when she moved back to island, she ran into Topper at the Heyward’s grocery store and he asked her out for coffee to catch up. The rest being history.

Topper on the other hand had a serious relationship that he left out west. Y/N was everything to Topper at one point in his life. He had grown from his relationship in high school. Learning from his mistake he always tried to not be clingy towards her. She was a history major, planning on becoming a teacher. Y/N loved kids, she always dreamt of having plenty of her own. Topper and Y/N were together for almost four and half years. Y/N thought she was going to marry Topper, never imagining her life with anyone else. They had made plans together. Moving back to the Carolina’s when they both finished school. Topper working at law firm for a while before starting his own practice, Y/N working at the high school he went too, or maybe the elementary school. They both wanted kids, Y/N wanted more then him, but they could compromise. They wanted to buy a nice house by the water, teach the kids how to surf, have a garden, maybe a dog. Everything was planned, until it wasn’t.

Y/N’s mom got sick her last year of university. Her mom had been sick a lot when she was a child, always spending time at other family’s houses growing up. She was an only child and her dad left when she was a little girl. When Y/N got the news that her mother was sick and needed her help, she didn’t question transferring to a university closer to home. In all honesty she thought about dropping out, being with her mom full time. The doctor told Y/N that this was her last fight. They thought she might’ve had 5 good years left, if they were lucky. When she told Topper this, he held her while she cried. He didn’t know a lot about her childhood, just assumed she like to keep that private, but that night she told him everything. Maybe she should have waited to bring up leaving, but she had to get everything off her chest that night. “Top, she only has a couple years left. I need to spend those with her. I need to be there for her.” Y/N tells him through tears and sniffles. “Wait, what do you mean? You’re not leaving, are you? Y/N/N, we have plans.” Topper was upset that she could so easily replace him. Not thinking twice about it. “You can come with me; we can do this together. I’m not sure if I can do this without you. Please Top, come with me. I need you.” She looked into his eyes and got the answer she wasn’t looking for. She saw anger and hurt. This wasn’t the Topper she fell in love. The one that was so kind and thoughtful.

That was where things ended. He wasn’t changing his life, not the life they wanted for her. It was selfish of him, but they had plans. So they went their separate ways. Topper always kept an eye on the obituaries from her hometown. A couple years after being with Sarah he finally saw it. Y/N’s mom had died and left everything to her. He sent a card and donation, wondering if she ever got. He even paid all the funeral expenses. In some way he was trying to make up for the hurt he caused her. That next day he proposed to Sarah. When they were sending invitations to everyone, Sarah asked if his list was ready. They had the same friends so they only people extra he wanted to invite were some colleagues and old university buddies. He kept one invitation for himself though. Not telling Sarah why he wanted and extra one. He wanted to send one to Y/N, but he wanted to send more then just an invitation, he wrote her letter, wanting to get things off his chest before claiming his love to another women in front of a church. He knew it was wrong to send it, but he didn’t care. He figured you’d moved anyways after your mom died. You always said you hated your hometown. He sat down at his desk grabbing a pen and just started to write.

Dear Y/N,

I don’t know why I’m doing this. I can’t being to imagine what you must be thinking right now. I could take a swing at it though. Maybe your think what the hell is he writing me letter for. He broke my heart; he tore it into a million piece when I needed him the most. I don’t know why I did that to you. I think maybe because I got so scared you were going to leave and move on without me. I had pictured our life a certain way for so long that I didn’t want it to go any other way. I fucked up Y/N. I fucked you over when you left. I read about your mother online. I should have been there with you to get through everything. I should have been there with you, to hold you when you cried for her, to help make the big decisions. I donated to the charity you picked out. The school meal program, the was sweet. You can see that I’m getting married, to Sarah of all people. She’s a nurse now, working at the hospital with my mom. Things have gotten better with my mom. Things aren’t so bad between us. She loves planning this wedding, her and Sarah are like kids in candy store with the details. I finished law school; I’m working at firm here on the island. It’s nice to be home, I’ve enjoyed surfing on the east coast again. Sometimes I look around and I wonder if things would have been different if you stayed and we did this together. I wonder if you would have liked it here or maybe you wouldn’t because you hate storms, and we get a lot of hurricanes. I want to apologize Y/N. I want to say I’m sorry for hurting you the way I did. I’ll never forgot the look on your face that night. It keeps me awake at night. What I did to you Y/N, it was wrong, and I wouldn’t blame you for ripping this letter up and not giving me second thought. But if you don’t if you read this know that I’m inviting you to the wedding. I want you there, and not in some vengeful way, but as someone who I still want to have there. I understand if you don’t want to come but I hope you find it somewhere in your heart to change your mind.

Yours truly, Topper

It was sunny that day. Y/N had run to the post office on her break at work. She had finished her degree a year late, opting to take a year off when her mother first got sick. She got three good years with mom. They did everything on her bucket list. They went to Italy, then went rock climbing. Her mom took a cooking class, but most importantly she watched her daughter get married. When Y/N moved back home, she had no time for men. She wasn’t over Topper and wanted to put her full focus on her mom. After a while things got better and her heart started to hurt less. She wasn’t looking for a relationship, but when a new teacher started at her school her boss asked her to help him out. Evan was great. He was funny, kind and smart. He listened to everything she had to say. He heard from other teachers what was going with her mom and he became her support person. He proposed after only eight months of being together, but the two of them were so happy. It was different happy then Topper. He didn’t make her feel the same way but she had to come to terms with the fact the no one was going to make her feel that way. It wasn’t fair to Evan to expect him to be someone he’s not. When he proposed it was the best day of her life. You guys did rush the wedding, but only because Y/N wanted her mom to be there. That was the last thing on her bucket list. To see her little girl, get married. Evan and Y/N didn’t take a honeymoon because a few weeks after the wedding her mom had finally passed. Y/N was devasted, she was hoping by some miraculous discovery they would cure her. It was a poor girl dream that didn’t come true. Y/N had planned the funeral with the help of Evan. When Evan went to pay for the funeral, the pastor told him it was already paid for by an angel donor. When he talked to her about, she assumed it was someone in the town that knew her mother.

When Y/N saw the letter she recognized Topper’s hand writing. It was like a child’s, scribbled and almost unreadable. She could only read it from years of helping him study for tests. Her heart stopped for the second time in her life. Sitting in her car reading the words he wrote to her brought back a lot of painful memories she sooner forget. She was so angry with him for bringing the past up but was happy to know that he had moved on from her. She never doubted that he would, after being so cruel to her, she began to wonder if all those years were just lies. Some sick joke to him. Though no matter what he did, Topper Thornton always held a special spot in her heart. She looked at the wedding invitation that went sent along with the letter and wondered if she should go. She could be spiteful and bring Evan with her making Topper fell some sort of pain. She didn’t think he could ever feel the same pain as she did. If it weren’t for Evan she would be alone right now.

Weeks turned into months and Y/N never told Evan about the letter she received. At first, she thought she wouldn’t go. Not giving Topper the validation that he still had some hold on her, but then she thought it might bring her closure to see him getting married. Maybe it would be like officially closing that chapter of her life. That’s what brought her to place she is now. Sitting in a plane on her way to North Carolina to watch the man she once so dearly loved get married. She brought a simple dress not wanting to stand out, as she clearly wasn’t going to know anyone. She had only been this nervous a few times before. Waving the flight attendant over for a drink, liquid courage is what she needed. She wasn’t going to make a scene. Just sneak in the back, watch them say their vows, and sneak back out. She didn’t even book a hotel room opting to leave right after. She told Evan that she was meeting a friend out there from college which wasn’t a complete lie.

After the longest flight of her life, she caught the last fairy boat to Topper’s hometown. She drove through town in a rental car. It was small but cute. She found herself picturing the life she could’ve had. All the things Topper told her about his childhood. She even drove by the school reminiscing on the time she spent with Topper. With 10 minutes until the wedding she parked the car outside the venue. Just breathe Y/N, they’re so many people here he wont even notice you. Twisting the ring on her finger she pulled herself out of the car and towards the church. Sitting in the back Y/N listened to people talk. All of them speaking about Topper and Sarah when they were younger, how he couldn’t have found anyone better. She noticed that he’s not up at the alter. She remembered that he always wanted his mom to walk him down the aisle, saying it just made sense.

Y/N was pulled from her train of thought when the music started to play, watching as the door opened. Her heart stopped; there he was. He had aged. He let his beard grow out a bit, and his hair was lighter. He looked so handsome in his tux. His mother looked the same as always, stern but happy. Then the wedding party came out three bridesmaids and three groomsmen. You recognized one of them being Rafe Cameron. You met him a couple times with Topper, they were best friends, but he was heavy into the drugs. He didn’t look strung out though. When ‘here comes the bride’ started everyone stood and turned towards the door. When they opened again a beautiful woman stepped out with her father. She looked stunning, the dress was simple and delicate and looked like it matched her personality. Y/N felt jealous of her, she wanted to be the one wearing the dress. Looking up at Topper, he looked like he was going to cry. That’s when it happened, he looked around the room to take the moment in, he saw her standing in the back looking at Sarah. He didn’t think she would come but he was glad she did. She looked older, but happy. She changed her hair colour, finally got the bangs she always talked about getting. Looking at her and then back at Sarah, Topper knew he was making the biggest mistake of his life. He wanted to run but knew he couldn’t hurt Sarah like he did Y/N. He couldn’t break two girls hearts’. So, with that he kept his eye on Sarah and forced himself to make the biggest mistake ever.

#topper thorton imagine #topper thorton x reader #topper obx #topper outer banks #austin north #outer banks #sarah x topper #sarah cameron #topper thorton x y/n #topper thorton #topper thornton x y/n

[lennydaisy]

EPIPHANY SERIES // OUTER BANKS // CHAPTER THREE.

(n.) a moment when you suddenly feel that you understand. or suddenly become conscious of something that is very important to you.

              “Care to seize the day, my friend?”

Outer Banks                                                                                                                  Season 1-                                                                                                                      FEM OC! and ?

Here’s the link to Chapter Two in case you haven’t read it already <3 Check it out!!

Babysitting isn't for everybody. And at the beginning, I didn't think I was for me either. They say every child is different and this job has proved that couldn't be more true. Call it delusion, but I thought babysitting would be the easiest job on the planet.  Getting paid to look after someone's kid for a few hours whilst they run for the hills for a sliver of free time.  Sounds easy enough right?

Wrong!

You need to have thick skin when it comes to babysitting. No matter how much the parents reassure and praise their kid for being a literal angel on earth. That said angel will call you a do-do head at least once whilst simultaneously having a tantrum because you told them no, despite how much they promised that their parents allow them to climb onto of the refrigerator.

The first time I babysat it was actually a baby I was watching. The mom wanted to get out of the house and away from the responsibility of her 6-month-old. She had graciously written up any and every scenario that could play out in the few hours she was gone. And I was feeling confident. Until I wasn't.

They wouldn't stop crying. And their special lamb, that the board told me to give to the baby when they were upset, ran out of batteries, and I couldn't find new ones anywhere.

They refused to eat, just spitting the pureed food back in my face. They also wouldn't keep their socks on and that was the last straw for my sanity. I understood now why the mom had been quick to run out the door.

I ended up calling Kie, begging for her to come and help. I don't know how she understood a word I said, I was practically hyperventilating over the line, staring at the baby who was crawling around in a fit of rage.

Kie was truly a godsend. She somehow fed the baby and managed to get them to sleep before the mom came back. It did result in me splitting my first wage with Kie, but I wasn't complaining, I was just happy that I made it out of that house with just a headache and not an external crisis. Though that did come later.

I've babysat an 8-year-old boy, who ran away from me in the park. I did find him eventually. After giving myself a hairline fracture in my right wrist from climbing the tree he got stuck in.

I've babysat animals before. That wasn't part of my non-existing contract, but the way they spoke about their pets was very humanlike. It didn't end well for me, it never does. It resulted in me holding four leashes of four overly excited Komodo Dragons. Just kidding. The refused to move and lacked any type of emotion.

'I took you guys to the beach, be grateful.'

Now, I know what you're thinking, Komodo Dragons? Aren't those Illegal to have as pets? The answer to that question is yes! But I didn't know that. Just imagine Shoupe's face when he saw me practically dragging not one, but four, exotic animals across the boneyard. It looked suspicious is all I'm going to say.

Turns out the two guys who asked me to babysit their dragons for them we're smugglers who purchased and sold exotic animals. Not good. Apparently, they were already under the police departments radar and the pair planned on legging it to the in-country hoping to change and clear their names.

That worked out well for them, I think? Nothing else was really mentioned of it after my dad collected me from the police station. They're still on the radar, I hope. If not then there are two brawny men out there that could come and kill me in my sleep for ruining their very illegal business. Look, If you are up to some suspect things, my dumbass is the last person you'd want to be involved. I will unironically get you caught.

That's how Ward Cameron had heard about my very pristine babysitting service. Noticing the little bit of trouble that always seemed to shadow me, he offered to hire me permanently as his youngest daughter's babysitter.

That was three years ago, and here I am still babysitting Wheezie.

"This is stupid," Wheezie complains, trudging behind me, pushing forward the shopping cart filled with lost items that we found on the beach.

Since there is no internet in Kookland, in other words, Wheezie's heart line is currently in critical care. I decided to venture outdoors with her for a change. Instead of just sitting around her three-storey clubhouse or in her four-acre backyard, I thought it would be nice to comb the beach of any debris that the hurricane brought along.  

There was a lot of personal items that washed up on the beach too. Wallets, bags, photographs, books, clothes, wine bottles, footballs, toys, you get the gist. Most of them were ruined, either waterlogged or just completely useless. However, somethings just needed a good clean, and that's what we are going to spend our day doing. There is no way of telling what belongs to who, so we'll just turn them into the lost and found and hope they'll check there if it was important enough to them.

Our two trollies worth didn't even make a dent in the rubble that litters the beach, but it was a start. Say hello to a summer of hard labour.

"There was a hurricane Wheezie, have some sympathy" I roll my eyes at the girl who was less than thrilled about today's plans.

"I do have sympathy," she claims defensively, "It's just pointless.  No one's gonna come looking for this junk," eyes flickering through the findings in her trolley.

What we found isn't pointless. They belong to someone. I think about it the same way I did as a kid when I wanted every single teddy bear in my bed at night so none got left out, so I didn't hurt their feelings. A ragged old soccer ball might look worse for wear, but it has a home and I going to get it back there.

"It's not junk," I object, stopping momentarily, waiting for the stroppy pre-teen to catch up. "Say you lost your phone and someone found it, and returned it too you. You wouldn't be grateful?" I theorize in terms that I know she would understand.

"My dad would just get me a new one," she shrugs nonchalantly, not missing a beat.

"Well, not everyone's fortunate that way," I remind her, blinking suddenly as the sun shines on something reflective in the cart, blinding me.

Reaching towards the sparkling object, I realise that it appears to be quite expensive. It's a glass ashtray. Rubbing the damp sand off the surface, my thumb feels an engraving. In swirly calligraphy, reads the initials:

'S.G'

"I'm sorry," Wheezie apologizes, wincing when she heard my comment, "I didn't think-"

"-It's okay," I smile at the girl. It's not like I don't understand my current life situation. It's pretty shitty, I know, but I live with it. I was born a Pogue for a reason. I wasn't supposed to be born with a silver spoon in my mouth, though that doesn't mean I hate those who are. They have it easier than me and my family, sure, but that's just how it is in the Outer Banks. Some are more fortunate than others. It does, however, leave a sour taste in my mouth that Kook parents will just throw money at there children to get them to shut up, but that's just a Pogue's opinion.

The generators haven't kicked in yet, seeing as though the Camerons security code gate is bouncing loosely against its unlocked hinges. Holding the gate open for Wheezie to push by with her cart, I catch a glimpse of their usually perfectly mowed lawn. Instead, I see plenty of fallen trees and scattered branches, broken plant pots, and ruined garden monuments. It’s not a good look, especially for the high-class Camerons.

That just goes to show, hurricane's don't show mercy on anyone, Kook or not.

As a wise man once said; 'Thanks Agatha, ya batch.'

Parking our carts beside the Cameron's private pool, away from the workers who are just trying to do their jobs. I turn to Wheezie saying, "You go get some soapy water and gloves and I'll empty the carts."

Nodding her head, she rushes into her house, leaving me slightly confused, 'Where did the sudden enthusiasm come from?'

Emptying the carts, I lay out what needs to be cleaned the most: from a bronze candlestick holder to a old, yet unique, shoe buckle, and everything in between. And of course, the ashtray. 

Holding it gently in my palms, legs crossed against the cold slabs, I couldn't help but feel hypnotised by the intricate marks that littered the tray. It truly was a lost treasure.

"I'll take that," announces a voice from behind my hunched figure, jumping when a hand snatches the tray from my grip.

Coming to my feet, I'm ready to snatch the tray back from the sudden thief, but I stop when I realise who it is. Why am I not surprised, I am on their turf.

If it isn't dumb, dumber and dumbest.

Throwing the delicate glass from hand to hand, Rafe lets out a low whistle, "Check the weight on that," he tosses it to Kelce who was standing tall behind him. Kelce nods his head in approval, of course agreeing with what Rafe has to say.

"Who did you steal that from Pogue?" Rafe smirks thinking he has me sussed out. Not wanting to give the satisfaction that him lobbing around the ashtray is causing me heart amputations, I stare him in the eye, "I didn't steal it. I found it."

"You did, did you," he utters pushing past me, his head low with a sick smile, taking in the view of the tressures that I had laid out, "And what about all this? Did you just find that too?"

I say nothing. He knows the answer to that question. I already told him. I don't need to explain myself, especially not to Rafe Cameron.

His eyes flicker over Wheezie and I's findings, taking in each and everyone with a curious eye,  before he cracked, "Bunch of junk," kicking some of the items into the pool.

All I could do was stare. Stare as someone's possessions sunk to the bottom of the marble pool, clashing and crumbling at the foot of Rafe. I fell sick.

His friend just laughs, egging him on. Kelce patting him proudly on the back, handing him back the ashtray. Rafe turns to face me, that smirk never leaving his face, but I can't look at him. I refuse to.

"-Hey Rafe, dad's looking for you," a soft voice breaks the harsh glare that Rafe was sending my way. Nodding his head at the voice, he holds the ashtray out for me to take.

It was too good to be true.

Gullible enough, I reach out for it, only to have it slip through my fingertips. Unable to hear the shattering of the glass as it hits the red slab, my brain refuses to accept fate as I stare down at the shards.

Laughing lightly, I bite my lip, nodding my head understandingly, not expecting anything less from Rafe. A sharp grip on my wrist snaps up my damp eyes, "See you later, Pogue," he hisses in my numb ear, before marching away as though nothing happened.

Sensing a presence, I meet eyes with the 3rd and final member of Rafe's crowd.

Topper.

Smiling lopsidedly at the well put together boy who hasn't moved or spoken since showing up, "Nice friends you've got there Topper," I say monotoned, watching as the boy snaps out of his trance-like state before following Rafe with a blank expression and his tail between his legs.

Shuddering out a breath, I unclip my waist bag and begin to pick up the chunks of glass. Pausing when a pair of clean, white shoes entre my line of sight, "Careful," she crounches down, picking up a shard, placing it into my bag.

A few minutes of picking up the sizable pieces, all that was left on the slabs was a glittering shimmer. Satisfied with what was salvaged, we stand back up to our full height. It was silent. Awkwardly silent.

"Thank you," I shyly say, not at all pleased that the Cameron girl had caught me in a moment of weakness, but at least she didn't mock me for it.

"Your welcome," she smiles before reaching for the tennis rackets she had thrown on the ground before coming to help me. Certain that was the end of the exchange, I turned back to the pool where pieces of metal and loose book pages float carelessly on the surface.

It was just a bunch of junk anyway.

"Hey," Sarah turns, rubbing the back of her head subconsciously, "I'm going to save mice from the birds," she says, pointing out to the bottom of her garden where the surge has blown over, waterlogging the grass.

I just blink at the girl, confused as to why she is even telling me this. Letting out a gentle huff, "I have a spare racket," she offers, holding out one of the two rackets she has in her hands.

Finally catching what she's throwing, I look anywhere but her direction, "I can't," hoping to find a legit excuse as to why I don't want to help her be a hero for mice. Then it hit me, "I'm supposed to be babysitting Wheezie."

My triumphant smile fell as fast as it came when Sarah says, "The powers back on, Wheezie will not willingly come outside again," still holding out the bat for me to take, "Also, my dad's back, so your shift ended about 20 minutes ago."

The more reasons she adds, the more difficult she is making it to say no, and she knows it as well. Her eyebrows dancing lightly as she waves the racket around like a tempting treat.

Giving in, seeing as though I have run out of excuses to give, I grudgingly accept the racket. Maybe her being the sworn enemy of my best friend would have been a good excuse, but I didn't think of that at the time. And what would I of said:

'Oh, I can't help you, even though you selflessly helped me, because my best friend hates your guts.'

What are we, middleschoolers?

I can't help but feel wrong about it though. Like I'm betraying my role as a pogue, as a best friend. But if I feel that way about just being near the kook princess, that doesn't make me any better than her brother. A judgmental prick.

Let's call it paying back a debt. She helped me, now I'll help her. Tit for tat. Anything to make my mind feel at ease.

Walking behind the women who seemed to be on a mission, I'm met by the shrieking flock of overhead seagulls, each nosediving into the burrows, hoping to catch their next meal.

"Operation ‘Save The Mice’ is a go," she announces, holding out her racket waiting for me to tap mines against hers, declaring our battle. I couldn't help but wonder aloud, "Why does this concern us?" tapping my racket unsurely against hers.

Nodding her head in confirmation, she takes her stance, eyes now set on the sky. "You have about as much compassion as a rock," she focusses her swing, untimely missing by a long shot. It was entertaining to watch, I'm not going to lie.

"Tell me something I don't know," I reply, leaping back as the girl swings her racket with vigour and fury at the diving gulls. I can't help but laugh at her attempts.

Having enough of my laughter she turns around, a challenging look flaring in her eyes, "Think you can do any better?"

I just shrug my shoulders, twirling the racket around my fingers, smirking at my trick, but Sarah just looks unimpressed. Watching as a flock of gulls take their position to dive,  I jump as high as possible hoping to swat them away.

At that moment I learned something about human capability. Humans shouldn't jump. Like ever. It's embarrassing. What do we expect? To touch the stars? It's nice to dream and imagine that when we push both legs of the ground, arms reaching high, that we are close to flying. Let's just say my non-existing dream to become an Olympic long jumper has just flushed down the toilet.

Another thing I learned is that when you swing a racket, with force, at a cluster of hungry Seagulls, you will get attacked. The only thing between them and they're next meal is me, and they didn't hesitate to remove me from the situation.

Letting out a shriek, I run away from the burrows, hands protecting my head as the birds swoop at me. Without a second thought, I run behind Sarah, using her as a shield to protect my crouching figure from the diving gulls.

After two minutes of fearing for my life, I can't help but chuckle at myself. And Sarah joins in, shoving my arm lightly, pushing me away from hiding behind her. The sudden shove causes me to stumble over my own feet, falling back on the grass. I couldn't help but laugh more, seeing stars as my stomach cramps in pain.

Sarah holds out her hand, trying her best to keep her balance from laughing, offering to help me up. I accept without a second thought, allowing her to pull me to my feet. Both smiling widely at our stupidity.

"Let's get these birds," I smirked at the girl who nodded her head in agreement. Both of us taking a battle stance, ready to defend our people. Or well Mice. They attack us, we attack them.

A cold shadow suddenly covers the setting sun that was shining against us. We let out another shriek, holding each other as we attempt to duck from the relentless gulls, running away from the burrows.

"Sarah!" I hear someone shout over our screams. Too busy protecting ourselves, we didn't even register the voice, "Mason?!" They ask in confusion.

Finally feeling safe enough from the killer birds, I look up to see Mr Cameron making his way towards us with Lana Grubbs at his side. 'Why is she here?'

"We're busy!" Sarah exclaims, picking up and tossing me the racket I had dropped when I fell, going back to swinging at the birds. She takes one side of the burrows and I take the other, waving around my racket. At this point I don't even care about the mice, those birds attacked me! So, I'm attacking them!

"What are you two doing?" Mr Cameron asks, not understanding why his daughter and his hired babysitter are running around like headless chickens.

"Saving mice," I reply, flashing my eyes over to the man, who stands with an ever so slightly amused look. "The birds are having a field day," Sarah adds, pulling me with her, chasing after the devils in the sky.

"Girls, the birds have to eat too," He implies, but we didn't hear any of it, still aimlessly swinging. "No, it's a mouse genocide out here," Sarah states breathlessly.

"It's the circle of life," Mr Cameron's patience was running thinner, "Now come on, I have a human being-" finally introducing the other presence in the garden. This pauses our attack, both looking apologetically at the lady, "-I'm so sorry. I'm Sarah."

Shaking the ladies hand, "This is Lana Grubbs, Scooter's wife," Mr Cameron introduces, "You were storm prepping with him, right?" he asks his daughter.

"Yeah," she answers, still breathless, "He helped me latch the cabin to the Druthers," nodding her head in the direction of the docked boat at the end of the pier.

'It's a nice boat,' I thought taking in the beauty of the three-story yacht, 'You can't hide money, huh.'

"Last night?"

"Yeah."

"And did he go out after that?"

"From here?"

"Yeah."

"No. Are you crazy? There was a hurricane," Sarah laughs lightly at the thought of someone willingly going out during a storm.'I could think of a few people,'  bringing my attention back to the two adults in front of me.

"Well, did he say where he was going?" Miss Lana asks, her eyes erratic, "Get a phone call or mention anything?" The desperation lacing her voice makes my heart stop with sympathy for the woman.

"He didn't say anything to me," Sarah shakes her head, her tone not hiding her pity for the lady.

"What about you Mason?" Mr Cameron asks me, "Have you seen Scooter recently?" his questions sparking Miss Lana to look my way, her eyes glistening with withering hope.

"The last I saw of him was when Pope and I delivered to your house," regret instantly hit me, as I had to be the bearer of bad news. It was true though. The last time I saw Scooter was earlier this week when he opened the door for his groceries. I've seen him at Save-A-Lot a few times, but that was months ago when I had to tell him to leave because other customers were complaining that he was bothering them for money.

"I'm sorry," I apologise to the lady who just shakes her head, looking at the ground.

"Is he okay?" Sarah asks her dad who just nods, wrapping an arm around Miss Lana, "He's absolutely fine," he reassures Sarah, before guiding the dazed woman back towards the house.

"Oh!" I hear Mr Cameron exclaim, spinning round to face me, digging through his pockets, "Thank you for watching Wheezie today," he says, placing a brown envelope in my hand.

"Thank you, sir," I smile with gratitude as he makes his leave again.

Sighing, I slap the envelope a few times in my hand, turn back to a Sarah. I go to snap her out of her daydream, but get interrupted by a distant voice, "Hey Sarah!"

At the top of the disarranged lawn stood a scornful Topper, hands in his pockets as he looks down on us, making his way over at a snail pace.

"You better go," I flick my head in the direction of her boyfriend whose eyes are slitted with distaste. Holding out the racket for her to take, she nods her head and makes her way over to Topper, not even sparing me a glance.

I get it.

"I want you to stay away from that pogue, alright?" I hear him utter not so quietly under his breath, knowing fine well that I'm still able to hear him. I pay him no mind, finding my own way out. That's what he wants. Attention. That's always been what Toppers wants. And I'm not going to give him that satisfaction. Not anymore.

Humming a gentle tune under my breath as I make my way towards the gate. I double-take when I spot a hunched figure sitting by the pool, "Wheezie?"

My sudden appearance spooking her as she ripped the earphones out from her ears, the buds projecting a catchy pop beat. The girl sat on the cold slabs, clad in yellow rubber gloves and safety goggles, surrounded my various cleaning tools: a basin of soapy water, a toothbrush, a blow torch?

"What are you doing?" I ask sceptically, making my way towards her as she stuttered over her words before giving up with a sigh.

"I heard what Rafe said," she admits, her voice low as though afraid to speak out against her brother. That's the Rafe effect. He gets off on it. Knowing that everyone around him, his family included, is too scared to tell him he's a mess with even messier opinions. "And it not true," she adds.

Wheezie walks over, holding out the shoe buckle that we found on the beach. The once rusted and unrecognisable buckle now sparkled a blinding silver, and despite its eroded corners, it was still in great condition, "Pretty, right?" she notices my expression, "That's not the best part," she claims, turning over the buckle,  holding it out of me to take.

Engraved on the silver base scribed, 'Made in Occupied Japan.'

"I couldn't save everything, like books and stuff, but I tried my best. I even made a box and everything," She rambles, rushing over to pick up the homemade box that read, "Lost and Found," painted in bold, pink lettering. In the box sat: a polished pin, the candlestick holder, a handful of leather wallets and all the other salvageable treasure that we found. And now the shoe buckle.

"It's not junk," she says, passing me the box, "They belong to someone and I hope they find them," she says, rubbing the back of her tinted red neck, finally understanding why I had her help me in the first place.

It's not junk.

I'm not great when it comes to other peoples emotions. They make me want to shrivel up and go invisible, but I can't help but admire the girls change of heart, but I'm still awkward so, I just ruffle her hair, hoping the annoying act conveys my gratitude.

Having enough of me for one day, Wheezie pushes me toward the gate, practically kicking me out. "See you next time kid," I shout over my shoulder, smiling as her face grovels at the word 'kid'.

Basking at my long journey home, I give up attempting to balance the light box in my arms. I place it on the sidewalk, unzipping my waist bag wanting to tuck the brown envelope, that I was struggling to hold, away. 

The clattering of glass pauses my actions. Reaching in, I pick out a small piece, watching as the setting sun danced across the surface, shining every colour of the rainbow onto the tarmac.

'S.G'

Chapter Three: FIN!

I really enjoyed writing this chapter, even though it’s kind of filler. Kie would be proud of Mason for beach combing, her tendencies are rubbing off on her.

I choose for Mason not to go to the motel because that’s just what I choose, I don’t really have a reason why. Well I do, but I can’t tell you yet. You’ll find out eventually, if my idea goes to plan...

So we learned about Mason very perfessional babysitting service. Also I know that Rafe is, y’know bad, but I’m excited to explore Mason’s relationship with him. It will be interesting to write!

What did you think?

I’m really excited to write the next chapter. Mason is going to get buzzed.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter <3

Also, if anyone would like to be tagged in future chapters, just let me know and I’ll for sure do that!

*TAGLIST*

@xshinytrashcanx​ @prejudic3​ @annoylinglyaries​

#outer banks #outer banks imagines #outer banks series #outer banks au #obx #john b routledge #John B imagines #John B x reader #jj maybank #jj maybank imagines #jj maybank x reader #kiara carrera #Kiara Carrera imagines #Kiara Carrera x reader #pope heyward #pope Heyward imagines #pope heyward x reader #Sarah cameron #Sarah Cameron imagines #Sarah Cameron x reader #rafe cameron #Rafe Cameron imagines #Rafe Cameron x reader #topper #topper imagines #topper x reader #outer banks fanfiction #writeblr #epiphany series #outer banks oc

[leafy-m]

I was tagged by @the-sober-folly in this tag game! Thank you!

What is the color of your hairbrush? Dark red

Name a food you never eat? Shellfish. Ew.

Are you typically too warm or too cold? Too warm.

What were you doing 45 minutes ago? Sleeping

What's your favorite candy bar? Twix

Have you ever been to a professional sports game? No

What is the last thing you said outloud? Walking through my fic, trying to figure out why it isn't working

What is your favorite ice cream? Oreo cookies and creme

What is the last thing you had to drink? Tazo Zen tea 💖

Do you like your wallet? Yes. It's green and has little leaves on it 🍃

What is the last thing you ate? Cherry yogurt

Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? No.

What's the last sporting event you watched? The Olympics, maybe??

What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? Hurricane. It's buttery popcorn with furikake seasoning and mochi crunch. It is THE BEST.

Who is the last person you sent a text message to? My mom

Ever go camping? When I was a baby. 😢

Do you take vitamins? Sometimes

Do you regularly attend a place of worship? Pre-Covid? Not since I was a kid.

Do you have a tan? Sorta?

Do you prefer Chinese or pizza? Aaaa. Both!

Do you drink your soda through a straw? Only if I'm at a restaurant.

What color socks do you usually wear? Black

Do you ever drive above the speed limit? Of course not, Officer.

What terrifies you? I can't be scared if I don't think about it. 💁‍♀️

Look to your left, what do you see? A floor fan that's too loud to use at night

What chore do you hate the most? Mopping/cleaning the floor.

What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? Steve Irwin

What's your favorite soda? I think I used to like Vanilla Coke?

Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? Drive thru

What's your favorite number? 7

Who's the last person you talked to? My mom

Favorite cut of beef? Thin lean cuts for beef teriyaki

Last song you listened to? Femme Fantome by Tres Bien!

Last book you read? Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief (I was told this series was worth reading)

Favorite day of the week? I like Tuesdays best, but Wednesdays are when I get fun stuff done.

Can you say the alphabet backwards? Yes. The trick is to break the letters into segments of three.

How do you like your coffee? Black. I don't like sugary-sweet coffee

Favorite pair of shoes? 😭 These black heeled boots with a little buckle that looked like Annie's from Covert Affairs (they wore out years ago but I still miss them)

Time you normally get up? I aim for 4am, but it's usually either 3:30 or 5:30 😑

What do you prefer, sunrise or sunset? Sunrise

How many blankets on your bed? 2. Comforter and a soft army blanket from Old Navy.

Describe your kitchen plates? They're an old Japanese porcelain set my Dad got a long time ago.

Describe your kitchen at the moment? It's pretending to be clean

Do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? Cinnamon whiskey and frozen margaritas

Do you play cards? Yes. I love hanafuda and whatever else I can get in on

What color is your car? Silver

Can you change a tire? Hahahahaha no

Your favorite state? Hawaii

Favorite job you've had? My current one

If you want to, I tag @e11evenseggos @juliedohbigny @meherya @amiraelizabeth and whoever wants to do this ❤️

[cdelphiki]

I know somebody who has a neglectful parent, and like at first they were like “oh it’s perfectly fine” and then later on like their feelings about it kinda turned to anger and a bit of guilt for feeling that away about their parent, and like their perception of proper parent-child relationships were a bit messed up too, but like, can you see any of the Batfam having a reaction to this to neglect? (Like either from Bruce or someone else)

I think this would describe Tim the most.  

Tim grew up with neglectful parents. Even in canon he excused their neglect because they ‘loved him,’ right?  And he loved them.  He looked back at them through rose-tinted glasses.  But even while he thought about them positively, he did also admit, aloud, that he wasn’t used to being cared about.  That he wasn’t used to having people concerned about him (in the context of being kidnapped! and missed!). He told his dad that it was pretty much ‘too late’ for him to step up and stop him from being Robin.  If he didn’t care when he was 12, why would he care now?  At 16ish?  

Anyway, so he grew up with neglectful parents, and excused their neglect, even if he kind of realized it wasn’t normal or right.  So to go from them to Bruce, any little bit of attention is probably like sunshine in the middle of a hurricane to him. He has no idea what a real parent-child relationship looks like.  Bruce just talking to him more than necessary is ground shattering for him.  

For him, I think it will take having a child of his own to really, fully, see the neglect/abuse he suffered his entire life, under all three of his parents.  That’s what it takes for a lot of people, after all, because there is nothing like holding your own child in your arms and suddenly wondering how on earth someone could just walk away from that.  (I tried to show this, actually, in Life Happens.  I didn’t want to go too far down the bad-dad-Bruce train in that, but Tim toyed with the idea that letting his kid fight crime was wrong.  Anyway…)

I don’t think this would make him stop loving Bruce. If we ignore the actual, blatant, physically abusive Bruce, and just look at a Bruce who is emotionally neglectful, that is.  Tim will always love Bruce as a father figure, but I think he’d distant himself emotionally to protect himself, once he realizes the affect that neglect is having and has had on him. 

For other batkids, I think Jason and Dick both got a different Bruce from the younger children.  Actually, we know this is canonically true.  Pre-Jason’s Death Bruce is a very different character. He was more emotionally available and involved in the lives of his sons.  He loved his kids, and told them as much.  So Dick, I don’t think, would have this reaction at all.  He had a loving, perhaps tad controlling, father for as long as he lived with Bruce.  

Jason, too, had a loving father, right up until his death. Jason’s issues all stem from after he came back, and I think he has plenty of reasons to despise Bruce. And most of them have to do with physical abuse.  Honestly, had Bruce just said “Jason, I love you,” when he first came back, his entire storyline would probably be different.  All Jason needed to know was that his dad loved him, and Bruce failed that test.  Miserably.  

So yeah, Jason definitely feels anger toward Bruce.  And a ton of guilt, because he seems to blame himself for everything wrong with their relationship.  (Although he goes back and forth on this more than a teeter-totter).  

(Black Mask tells it how he sees it.)

Damian already holds resentment toward Bruce, in canon, for his neglect.  He’s pissed at Bruce half the time.  He runs off to stay with the Titans, and he flat out yells at Bruce over ‘not caring’ unless it’s convenient for him.  Take this panel, for example:

He’s mad that Bruce shows up just in time to yell at Damian, but Bruce didn’t even bother to go to his 13th birthday party.  So yeah, Damian is already there.  And that probably has a ton to do with Dick, and how Dick showed Damian what being loved looked like before Bruce came back to take custody of him.

So he’s already there.

As for other Batkids, I don’t think any of them live with Bruce in the same way the four main boys have?  I know he adopted Cass, but did she ever rely on him in the way a child relies on a parent?  Or was their relationship more that of an adult child and adult parent relationship?  I haven’t read her comics yet.  Then Duke was never adopted by him, and he doesn’t live with Batman anymore because he lives with his own family.  So I don’t count him as one of the children of Batman.  Part of the Batclan?  Absolutely.  But he’s not Batman’s son.   🤷🏼‍♀️

Interesting question, anon!  Thanks for asking.  :D

#Okay honestly I just used panels I already had saved on my computer #so I have no idea where exactly they're from #but it's from Robin (1993) #RHATO (2016) #and Teen Titans (2016) #and that is exactly as specific as I can get #sorry #Jason Todd #Tim Drake #Damian Wayne #Dick Grayson #Batman #Batfam #Batfamily #child neglect #child abuse #Bruce is a bad dad :( #sometimes

[winterromanov]

we will grow taller together - bucky x reader

PART THREE - YOU’RE VERY LOUD FOR SOMEONE SO SMALL

parts: masterlist

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

extract: He sniffs what could be a laugh if he had any energy whatsoever. “I wish you were psychic. Then you could maybe tell me what goes through a six-year-old’s head.”

genre: nanny x single father!au

taglist: @blindedbyyourgrace17 @verygraphicink @chubby-dumplin @igotkatiepowers @welcome-to-my-studylife @bi-bi-bi-bisexualz @mywinterwolf @mychemicalimagines (still open, message to be tagged)

The following week or so is swallowed by the pre-Thanksgiving rush, so other than a quick text to confirm his number and a Facebook request you’ve not heard all that much from James. Work is mayhem as you try to learn at least eighty holiday drinks combinations and you go shopping with Natasha for Thanksgiving tableware, as her and Steve are hosting Steve’s parents for the first time at their apartment. Your whole family lives on the West Coast so you’ve decided not to make the trip to your childhood home this year. It makes you sad in a constant, throbbing kind of way, to spend Thanksgiving without them, but you’d mutually decided with your mom and dad that the trip just isn’t economically or temporally viable. Even the cheapest flights exceed two hundred dollars and you’d end up spending most of the vacation cramped in a plane seat and listening to babies screaming anyway. Natasha offers a place at their table but you can tell she’s a little anxious about impressing Steve’s family and you’d rather not add any hassle. Looks like it’ll probably be white wine and Friends re-runs for you this year, but at least you’re not fucking working for once.

You think everything has returned to normal. So much so, in fact, that when the weekend rolls around and you turn up to Steve and Natasha’s place in a party dress for their pre-Thanksgiving do it doesn’t cross your mind that James might also turn up. Or what will happen if he does.

“Looking sexy, (Y/N),” Natasha clicks her tongue approvingly when she answers the door, hand on her hip. Your frock is dark blue velvet and long-sleeved, hugging your figure in a way that makes you feel more self-confident than you actually are. It is pretty sexy, you think, but your attempts are always nothing compared to Natasha’s. Her dress is elegant and black and split all the way down the front to enhance her already impressive cleavage, and combined with the gentle curl of her red hair and matching lipstick she looks like a rebellious Hollywood starlet.

That’s always been Natasha, though. She always looks beautiful, exuding a natural class, but also in a dangerous kind of way. She looks like she could break your neck and smile while doing it. It’s pretty fucking powerful, to be honest.

“Nothing new there, then,” you remark, stepping inside. Natasha smirks and hands you a glass of champagne from the table by the door. Tipsy laughter and a Taylor Swift song play from the kitchen, so you follow Natasha’s clicking black heels to the main room of the party.

So far, it isn’t so crowded, but Steve and Natasha are pretty popular (Steve because he’s A Really Nice Guy, Natasha because she isn’t) so you expect the couches and corners will fill up as the night draws on. You recognise most of the people chatting over bowls of chips and hummus but you only know Steve by name, so you naturally gravitate towards him once Natasha’s elbow is caught by a well-built man with brown hair.

Steve is talking to a broad, dark-skinned guy with cropped black hair that you keep seeing around. Both of them look at you when you come over, the unnamed man scanning you discretely up and down with a half-smile on his face.

“(Y/N)!” Steve announces excitedly, squeezing your shoulder. “You know Sam, right?”

“I do not,” you reply, shaking his hand, “But I’m always happy to meet new people.”

“Likewise,” Sam replies. He scrubs up well in a smart shirt and shoes, Steve sporting a similar garb. As is usually the case with these things the girls have obviously made more effort, but in your experience, if a man has combed his hair and put on cologne they’re already too good to be true. “Steve may have mentioned you a coupla’ times.”

“He has?” You quirk an eyebrow, and Steve shrugs. He doesn’t look embarrassed about the fact. “All good, I hope.”

“Mostly. Although, there was an incident at one of Natasha’s parties in your junior year that you might—“

“Okay, so what happens in a crappy basement apartment during college under the influence of extremely cheap beer stays there,” you interject, the two men laughing, “I’m an adult now. All that stuff is behind me, I can assure you.”

You chat to the two of them a while longer, you and Sam mostly swapping funny stories about Steve—he feels like your safety conversation starter, the thing you have in common. Eventually Natasha drags Steve off into the kitchen and you’re left with Sam alone. What is it with Steve and abandoning you with his friends? Not that Sam is a problem. He’s attractive and funny, your sense of humour instantly clicking with his.

“So, (Y/N),” Sam says seriously, “Would you like another drink from the Rogers free bar?”

When you look down at your glass you realise it’s empty already. You’re not a big drinker, not anymore, but another glass to ease any surface anxiety wouldn’t hurt. After all, you think the guy in the jarringly expensive suit by the window might be Tony Stark, the tech billionaire, and the sheer amount of wealth that pours from his figure has left you on edge. That, and the fact you have always strongly believed that billionaires are unethical. Maybe another glass would give you the confidence to tell him that.

(You have no idea how Steve and Nat know Tony Stark, because you know enough about both of them to acknowledge he’s not their typical company.)

You shrug your shoulders and let him take your glass. “Sure. Thanks.”

Sam disappears and you trail after him at a distance, hovering outside the kitchen. You nod to the beat of a Vampire Weekend track, not really paying attention when the buzzer goes off, because people are expected to come and go. Natasha smiles as she slips past you to the door, deftly pulling the latch aside with a flick of her fingers.

Your body straightens from your slouching position against the wall when you realise who is waiting in the hall.

James. James is there, a small child clinging to his neck, the metallic frames of her bright pink sunglasses catching the hallway light.

“Hi,” you hear him say breathlessly, “Sorry I’m so late. Clover has—Clover wanted to see you both, so I couldn’t… Well. She wouldn’t let me leave her with the babysitter.”

“I don’t like Mrs Mary.” A child’s voice—Clover’s voice—responds, her tone low and sullen. “I like Auntie Nat.”

“It’s a good job that I like you too then, huh?” Natasha’s arms reach out and James hands her his daughter. “Nice sunglasses. Always useful in November.”

“If you wear sunglasses you can cry and people won’t notice.”

Yikes. The comment leaves the two adults stunned for a moment, before Natasha combs a strand of blonde hair out of Clover’s eyes, smiling fondly. “Let’s see if we can find you some cookies.”

You move out the way when Natasha comes back down the hallway, watching as James closes the door behind him. He starts when he sees you standing there, but his edges soften when he realises it’s you who is watching. He looks even more exhausted than the evening in his apartment, his eyes grey and hollow, shoulders dipping. He still manages a watery smile for you.

“Tough day?” you ask, even though it’s obvious. His mouth opens. Nods wearily.

“You could call it that.”

“If it’s any consolation, an old lady shouted at me for putting a snowflake made out of chocolate sprinkles on her mocha because she doesn’t like cold weather. I was like…I’m not paid to be psychic, Brenda, or whatever your name is.”

He sniffs what could be a laugh if he had any energy whatsoever. “I wish you were psychic. Then you could maybe tell me what goes through a six-year-old’s head.”

You smile gently, sympathetically. “I think a lot of people would have a hard time telling you that.”

Sam then reappears with your drink, but takes one look at James’ expression before sighing and disappearing again. Moments later he emerges with a second glass of champagne and shoves it into his grip.

-

The party returns to normal for about thirty minutes after, Clover bouncing comfortably between her dad and Nat and Steve and Sam, bright and funny and charming all the guests she doesn’t know with her gap-toothed grin. But it’s like—it’s like a light flicks in her head and suddenly she’s having a meltdown in the bathroom, screaming through tears she doesn’t know how to control. You can hear James talking to her and trying to calm her down, but his voice keeps wobbling, like he’s on the verge of breaking down too. Taking a deep breath for courage, you twist the knob on the bathroom door and invade a conversation you should probably stay out of.

James eyes glance up at you in desperate surprise. The shock also freezes Clover, like the lull in the middle of a hurricane. Her tiny face is red and wet with tears, pained in a way that is heart-breaking to see on any child. Your hand brushes across James’ back as you crouch to meet her height. Blue eyes scrutinise every single inch of your body.

“So. You’re Clover Barnes.” You delicately offer your hand and Clover looks at it, faced scrunched, before slotting hers into yours. “I’m (Y/N). I’m a friend of your dad and Uncle Steve and Auntie Nat.”

Clover blinks back, but doesn’t say anything. She’s not screaming though, so at least that’s something. You’ve done that, at least. Even if it’s just out of shock.

“I have to say, Clover, you’re very loud for someone so small.” You try not to smile as she looks mildly offended at this observation on her height, because six year old priorities, right? That’s what’s really going through her head. The fact that she’s perhaps half an inch shorter than the other girls in her class. “But people used to say that about me, too. There’s nothing wrong about being loud, but there’s no point in having such a big voice if no-one can understand you. You gotta talk to your dad if something is upsetting you—I’ve been told you’re super clever so I’m absolutely certain you can tell him what’s up.”

Clover is silent for a moment, and you wonder if your spontaneous pep talk (which you somehow pulled straight out of your ass) will go totally ignored, but she takes a shaky breath and looks James straight in the eyes.

“I don’t wanna go to grandma and grandpa’s for Thanksgiving,” she sniffles, “I heard you talking on the phone and I don’t wanna go. Please don’t make me go. I wanna stay here with you. Please don’t send me away.”

James almost crumbles away into nothing when he grabs her into a hug, squeezing all the air out of her lungs. Her hands slowly curl around his neck, meeting at the nape, her face burrowed deep into his shoulder.

“I won’t send you anywhere, I promise,” James murmurs. His eyes catch yours and he looks at you in a mixture of amazement and thankfulness and more prominently relief. “Sweetheart. Baby. You’re not going anywhere.”

The tantrum must have tired Clover out because slowly, gradually, she flops in James’ arms; her eyes flutter closed while still pressed in James’ shoulder, so he rises and gestures for you to open the bathroom door. Natasha and Steve open up their spare bedroom so you follow him in quietly, pulling back the bedsheets so he can slot Clover in to sleep the rest of the evening off. She looks so peaceful and relaxed, like a normal six-year-old girl, like she could wake up again and everything would be normal and okay.

But you know—nothing about this is normal. You thought that Steve was being a bit over-the-top about them needing help, but you can see it now. It’s not so eccentric. They need something. Something.

When James pulls the door so only a small shaft of light from the hall glows on Clover’s tranquil face, his hand curls round your wrist.

“I take back what I said, that time at my apartment.” His eyes are frantic. Pleading. “I do need your help. Please, (Y/N). I need so much fucking help.”

You turn your hand so that it clasps his, squeezing tightly. “I’m here.”

#ugh im emo #mcu #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #we will grow taller together #bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky imagine #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes au #fanfic #fic #marvel fic

[vncvrsmrtrntnghts]

Barhop

March, 2020. Toronto

“Why are you here?” Cam pressed as he looked fervently into my eyes. I felt the warmth of the beer haze wash over me but held steady to concentrate on my answer. I paused.

“I’m here because I want to know why we could not have talked earlier.”

~

Christmas, 2017. Vancouver.

I pulled up to the party, happy to see some familiar faces. I did not have a party-sized purse because quite frankly, I was the type of person who would probably be the responsible mom in the back, drinking her drinks, hanging by the bar, dancing here and there, but remaining relatively sober to take care of everyone else. But if I knew the friends I was with tonight, I would know very well that I would probably be peer-pressured into drinking more than what I would want. Not because of bullying or peer-pressure, but because I’d be having too much fun and let the night slip away from my never-ending control.

“Hey! Sarah you’re here!” said Elsa, who was already red-faced and handed me her shot.

“Good god, what is this” I said as I sniffed the drink, made a face, and then took a deep breath before downing the shot so I could finally take my coat off. 

Cam whirled around his apartment proudly and showed me around. The kitchen filled with beer paraphernalia that came with the territory of working in a beer sales job, his room, with an incomplete bed, but made complete with a banana costume in the corner... because you could always use a lobster costume at one point or another.

It felt like old times, like a New Years but not. All the cousins, and me, the other family-friend who was considered family, banded together for a pub crawl to just celebrate each other, debauchery and the fact that our parents left the alcohol out for us way too early on. 

I caught up with everyone to ensure that I did my rounds, quietly tried to pass off drinks to others by stating I had brought nothing with me and did not want to mooch (which was then followed by other drinks and sips to ensure I was not thirsty) and then it was off to the first bar.

As we quickly walked in the damp Vancouver wetness, I struck up a conversation with Bee, one of the cousins who was a year older than me, and her life. Bee told me that she had concluded that she was polyamorous, and was seeing multiple people. She described that she was happy with her boyfriends and they all knew each other, and they all gave her something that she needed. it was oddly liberal but almost expected from a group of first and second-generation Asian youths. I applauded her for being so true to herself, but knew that I, a sheer monogamist, could not fathom letting my partner be with another out of pure jealousy.

Before I could even ponder or ask further about the polyamorousness of her life, we arrived at the first bar where Cam proceeded to strike up a conversation with the bouncer. As luck would have it, he mentioned he was the beer supplier and we were all let in.

“A round for everyone,” Cam announced as we all settled in and started to pull up stools and tables to accommodate our giant crew. The waitress pulled up and Cam effortlessly struck up a conversation with her about how here evening was going and requested a pint. That was always something that seemed to impress me; as someone who was always on the go, and who was actually quite shy, I tried not to ever do small talk and never really cared to. But whenever Cam did, it was never really that small, it was a genuine question to make someone feel good, or at least feel accepted. Despite his bad habits and constant jeering at the people closest to him, he was kindest to those he did not know.

Jules proceeded to buy the next round. He was the hipster before hipster was really a thing, loved photography and streetwear, and although seemed to appear cooky and scrawny, he matched the Vancouver hot hipster-boy vibe. And that was complemented by his hipster girlfriend Rhianne who also loved photography, art and Aritizia clothing. 

I sat quietly and observed Jules and Cam proceed to fight over the bill like two Asian dads as the waitress mentioned we could not split the tab. Whomever paid we would just owe money anyways, but it was the principal that was important. No matter how many sips I took, the beer just simply would not seem to disappear fast enough, and before I knew it, we were onto our next bar.

It seemed nostalgic to be back. The memories, the baggage, all of it that was here with me. Nothing ever happened in Vancouver when I came back, and to me, home was the antithesis of adventure. But there I was, walking quickly to the next bar with my childhood friends in the middle of the night like what we had always wanted. But in the back of my mind there was something that I’d always wanted too that was deep in the vault of my brain - the thought of Cam.

New Years’ ago, we would always have a moment together. He’d be back from Toronto and I’d be at the party as the family friend and we’d just talk... catch up... each year we’d see each other grow, I’d hear about who he was seeing and he would inquire about me. But there was an understanding of continuous support. And then when he started dating Lisa, it seemed like that was it for him and he’d be with her... that was until they broke up.

I can’t even remember the next bar. I think it was an Irish pub, or maybe we could not even get in so we skipped straight to the bar. Either way, I was excited because I was finally going to Fortune, the hip hop and R&B club that everyone had always recommended to me.

Dance with him my mind screamed. He was twirling Elsa and dipping Bee, mosh pitting with Jules and I stood in the back as I always expected I would... with my non-party bag, toying with my cranberry vodka. I couldn’t, it would be too much time that had caught up to us and I didn’t want to blow it all with one seedy night in front of all our friends... and his family. But I could not let it go, him go, once more after seeing him with others. I danced.

The bass was as heavy as my body. I swayed and tried to move past, but Cam’s hand caught mine as I realized that it was indeed me who had started grinding on him. Okay, I guess he just wants to dance too I mused. Like a school dance where everyone grinds on everyone, and then you go back to being normal the next day, perhaps it was like that. Nothing, because that was always how it was.

Somehow, Jules, Rhianne, Bee and Elsa all disappeared. As the music continued, the crowd rushed in and we were lost in a sea of people. An unexpected moment alone sparked my fear, but the drunken hum of the beat and my own curiosity made me want to stay.

Cam grabbed my hand and twirled me, then led me to the side of the dance floor where there were stools and a ledge. Expertly and effortlessly, he pulled me in with both hands on my arms and smirked.

“Do you want me to hold your bag for you, or put it to coat check mom?” He teased. We both knew I was not prepared, that I expected to be home after the pre-drink and that I’d see him the next day for a movie with our dads. It was a mom bag, that I embarrassingly toted around that night, but it almost expertly got in the way when I needed to most.

“No, it’s okay, I still manage to dance just fine with it... and I don’t want to get my stuff stolen” I shyly said. When did I ever care if he thought I looked cool? Apparently in this moment, which unfortunately was unraveling things that I was not expecting.

He held me like he had never held me before. His hands on my waist, he pulled me in and kissed my cheek, pulled away and smiled again with his cheeky smirk and a dash of longing. I looked back at him, curious and taken aback. I had heard all his stories, laughed at all the girls he had tried to pull in with the same dirty tricks, even encouraged him when he was with Lisa to be earnest and true to her. But somehow, I had leapt out of the friendzone into a territory I knew nothing about.

“Cam,” I started, and then his lips were on mine. We can’t do this, I’m not ready, why have we never talked about this, and where did this come from? You never liked me, it was always Lisa, or other girls who were different than me, I was always the rock, the one who gave advice... the one in the safezone.

I pulled away and stared back in shock. He pulled me back, forehead to forehead, nose to nose and I rested there. The smell of his cologne and the beer we had been drinking hit me.

“What are we doing?” I yelled. It seemed impossible to have a quiet moment, but that was where we were in this club, and the world seemed to stop for a minute so we could sort this out. I wanted to be close to him, to know him, to acknowledge what we had been feeling for a decade or more.

He took a breath but did not pull back. He did not answer me, but went in for another kiss, and I dodged and his lips met my cheek. 

“Cam, please. I... I want to but... your family, my friends, this is all so sudden.”

Cam’s brow furrowed and he looked at me puzzled. “You can’t be serious. Sudden?”

“Yes, sudden. You were just with Lisa like... a year ago, but that was for a long time. And I know you’ve been seeing other girls, I just...” I trailed off. Don’t want to be caught in your hurricane of bounce backs and adventures. I want to be the one because that’s what it has been all along for me.

“You just ‘what’, Sarah... you started dancing with me.”

I stood back stunned. I never meant any harm or mischief, but I also did not know if he thought of me in that way. I was always the other, the one who never seemed to get onto that side of him. But I also knew what he was capable of.

“Can we just talk about this for a second?” I yelled earnestly.

“What’s there to talk about?” he yelled, looking impatient.

~

March 2020, Toronto

“That... that is what I wanted to talk about. That is why I’m here.” I stated as-a-matter-of-factly, “Three years ago we were at a bar and I felt something. And you felt it too and I just messed it up by asking too many questions and you walked away. Why didn’t you want to talk to me? Why did you make me feel like I ruined a moment instead of telling me you’d be there and everything would be alright?”

“Because I didn’t!” Cam tensely said. “Look, I’m sorry I made you walk away, but the fact you made me feel like I was just trying to pounce on you because you were some available meat that night was just really shitty.”

“I didn’t want to. But I had no idea how you felt. And it didn’t really help when you just ghosted me for a year last year, after we slept together and had a moment. I didn’t want it to be anything more and clearly you didn’t either but why didn’t you just tell me how you felt?” I cried.

“I knew I should have reached out earlier...” Cam trailed off.

[sweetness47]

The Island – new beginnings

Chapter 1 pairing: Dean x Sam

Deserted island - @deanandsambingo​

Deserted Island - @samwinchesterbingo​

Accidental Confession - @spndeanbingo​

Blow Jobs – @spnkinkbingo​

WARNINGS!!! MATURE 18+ READERS ONLY!!! Wincest, smut, blow jobs, swearing, mild angst (loss of parent), AU

Final word count: 897

(Four years ago)

Three days. That’s how long they’d been adrift. They had run out of fresh water yesterday, and rations the day before that. Dean wished he’d stayed home with Sam, not gone fishing with Dad. Now their father was gone, and the two boys were close to being next.

The hurricane had swept in suddenly, without warning. But even if they had seen it coming, the results would have been similar. The tiny fishing vessel was no match for the might of the storm. John had been swept overboard by an onslaught of large waves, the current grabbing him and dragging him down to his doom.

The two boys didn’t have time to grieve, trying to grab what they could, then trying to get to the lifeboat. Any item worth salvaging they tied to themselves. They also tied themselves to the raft, and to each other.

Most of their goods had survived, for which they were grateful. However, midway through Day 4, both brothers were starting to lose hope. The hot sun made them drowsy. They woke some hours later, their small raft finding shelter on a deserted beach.

They had survived.

Both climbed from the boat, cooling of in the water, then searching for a clean water source. After an hour, they found a fresh water pool, with a waterfall and a cave. Banana trees surrounded the area, along with wild berries, pineapple trees, and coconut.

Sam and Dean brought over their raft, and used it to build a shelter by the cool spring water, then stripped down to their shorts and went swimming. After their dip in the water, they fashioned some fishing poles from branches and caught some wild fish from the ocean for dinner.

Once they had finished their meal, they set out to explore more of their new home. They found some nuts, mint leaves, papaya trees. So far, they had not come across any poisonous creatures, or annoying insects. It was actually nice and peaceful, practically perfect in every way.

Week two was pretty much the same, well the start of it was, until one evening, about mid week, when Dean had decided to amuse himself and Sammy with truth or dare. He figured, since they were both here forever, might as well come clean with secrets and shit like that. Besides, he needed to confess something that had been on his mind since before the shipwreck.

Sam, meanwhile, agreed to the game for similar reasons. Neither knew the other’s desires yet, but there were about to.

Sam spoke first. “Truth or Dare, Dean.”

Dean smirked. “Truth.”

“What is one thing you’ve always wanted to do, but were too scared to?”

Dean’s voice deepened as he thought about what he truly wanted at that moment.

“I want you Sammy. I want to kiss you, fuck you, blow you, then have you return the favor.”

Sam’s jaw dropped. It took all of half a second for the younger Winchester to stand and go to dean, his lips crushing his brother’s. They quickly discarded their boxers, then Sam knelt in front of his older sibling, coming into eye contact with a very erect cock. Sam licked his lips, then ran his tongue along Dean’s length. He took the tip in first, teasing with his teeth, his tongue swirling over the tip, tasting the pre cum that leaked.

Dean moaned, grabbing his brother’s hair, and Sam’s hands grabbed Dean’s thighs, taking him full into his mouth, sliding his lips all the way down. Sam massaged Dean’s balls while he moved his mouth up and down, sucking him while humming.

“Fuck!” Dean whispered. He began to help Sam, moving his hips, thrusting into his brother’s mouth. “Gonna cum Sammy!”

Sam stopped just as Dean shot cum down his throat. He took some in his hands and rubbed it on his cock. Dean moaned in anticipation as he got on his hands and knees. Sam, his hard erection now coated with his brother’s seed, rubbed some semen on Dean’s anus before pressing the tip of his cock at the tight entrance. Dean’s head lowered and he relaxed, giving Sam the right angle, and the younger Winchester pressed forward, slowly. Dean shuddered as he felt Sam’s intrusion, pain mixing with pleasure as inch by inch, he was filled.

Sam groaned as he bottomed out, stopping as he gave Dean a chance to adjust to his massive girth.

“Fuck Sam! You feel so good!”

“Dean!” Sam’s reply was a whisper, like a love song, as he began to move, pulling almost out, then slamming back, inciting a pleasurable cry from Dean.

He picked up speed then, reaching around to find Dean hard once more.

“You’re my bitch now, Dean. You like that, don’t ya. My brother, being fucked like a whore. MY whore. You’re so hard Dean. Is this for me? Hmmm?”

Sam’s words made Dean’s cock even harder, if that was even possible.

“Sammy!” he whimpered.

Sam cried out then as he came, shooting his hot load into his sibling. Both collapsed, breathless, but they weren’t done.

Not by a longshot.

#spnkinkbingo #deanandsambingo #samwinchesterbingo #spndeanbingo

[onlyonewoman]

Forcing himself to enter their garden and then their frontdoor without showing any worry, is a thing Xue Yang has taught him because it doesn’t alert Xingchen’s already peaked anxiety. Because oh yes, it’s peaked. In their kitchen, more or less every surface available is filled with bread, muffins and scones but apart from sprinkles of flower here and there, it’s spotless. He can smell the cleaning soap, the laundry powder and from the livingroom he can hear Xue Yang talking in an unusually calm voice, completely sans edges and teasing, and how Xingchen answers him fast, too fast and too long and fuck, he’s absolutely panicked. “…and then I thought about the recipe my grandmother used to make and my aunt tried to do it plenty of times but didn’t get the texture quite right, so I thought, maybe it’s because of the cornflour! You know how cornflour is gluten-free, right?” “Uh-huh.” “And so this recipe…” Oh, fuck.

#songxuexiao #song lan #xue yang #xiao xingchen #the untamed #fanfic #ao3 #ao3feed #modern au #domestic disgustoids having a terrible friday #pre-three dads and a hurricane

[artificialqueens]

Everybody’s Talking About Jamie (Biadore) - Lemonade

Summary: Danny and Ivy surprise Roy days before opening night. Roy confides in Danny about his anxieties.

AN: Thank you to the three anons who’s requests inspired this fic!! I’m really happy with how it turned out! Usually I prefer to write Roy and Danny a bit older and married when they have Ivy, but the request was cute so I figured why not! Just a warning this is a lot longer than my recent fics.

Ivy and Danny surprising Bianca at opening night of everyone’s talking about Jamie.

Fancy writing a fic about Adore comforting Bianca who has pre show nerves before Jamie (it’s usually the other way round & I think you write about their emotions so well)..with some smut as well

Lemonade please could you write some smut/some soft angst with Roy being upset and needing comfort

TWs for the smut included: Casual biting/scratching/hair pulling

Danny ❤️

I have a surprise for you

Danny ❤️

It should be at your door in 10 min :)

Roy glanced at his phone while going over lines. He cracked a smile seeing the messages were from Danny. It was a moment of relief from the stress and anxiety Roy had been feeling days before opening night.  

Husband 🌸💛💍💕

I wish you could be at my door in 10 minutes

Roy tossed his phone across the bed once he texted Danny back. He continued studying his lines. The biggest fear he had was blanking on that stage in front of all those people with all their expectations of him.

A knock on the door broke his concentration. As appreciative as Roy was of Danny’s support, he wished Danny would have waited until opening night to have flowers sent to him. Roy huffed in frustration before getting up. He grabbed his wallet to tip whoever had brought the flowers to his room.

When he opened the door nobody was there. Great, a prank was the last thing he needed. He cursed under his breath, ready to slam the door shut before a small voice spoke up, “Hi, Daddy!” The wallet slipped out of Roy’s fingers. He’d recognize that voice from miles away.

All the worry washed from Roy’s face, replaced by a beautiful, bright smile. “Hi, my sweet girl.” He scooped Ivy up in his arms, slinging her across his hip. “What are you doing in England, Ivy?” He joked with his daughter.

“I’m here to see you!” The child excitedly replied, beaming up at her dad. She grabbed his face with both of her hands. “Kiss!” Ivy demanded.

Roy gave her a peck on the lips. “You get more like your father everyday.”

“I like Dad,” Ivy said.

Roy chuckled at her, “I’m glad you like Dad. I like him too.” Roy glanced in the hallway for any sign of Danny. “Do you know where your dad is?”

He had hidden behind a stray service cart. “Surprise!” Danny yelled as he jumped up from behind it. The trick tickled Ivy, her small hands clapping frantically.

Roy put their daughter down so he could hug Danny. He buried his face in Danny’s neck, his hand instinctively going to Danny’s hair, combing through the long locks. Roy held on to Danny for as long as Danny allowed it. He felt like he was home, like he could breath for once. In the moment he was safe and calm; Ridden of any stress from the past month. Ivy decided to join in, hugging both of her dad’s legs. Roy reached down to rub her back.

It was more than obvious to Danny that Roy wasn’t okay. They always missed each other, but Danny could feel something different in their hug; See something different in Roy’s expression. When he pulled away, Danny sent Ivy into another room. “Why don’t you go check out how comfy Daddy’s bed is?” Danny enticed Ivy. She loved stealing her dads’ bed. There have been more than a few nights where Roy and Danny had to carry her back to her own because she had fallen asleep in theirs.

Danny stepped closer to Roy. “Hey—,”

He wasn’t able to speak as Roy crashed his lips against his. He slipped his tongue into Danny’s mouth, moaning when he got a taste of him. Roy backed Danny against the now closed door. He kissed him passionately, a hand resting under Danny’s shirt. Danny whimpered as Roy bit his lip. The younger couldn’t help but to raise his hips against Roy’s. “Missed you,” Danny huffed.

Roy sucked on Danny’s bottom lip before breaking the kiss. “I miss you too,” he kissed Danny’s lips again. “I missed you so much,” and again. Roy finally let Danny breath. “Sorry. I just needed to do that before Ivy came back.”

Danny smirked at him, “Don’t be sorry.” Danny wrapped his arms around Roy’s neck while Roy’s arms wrapped around Danny’s waist. “That was hot.” Now Danny was the one stealing kisses from Roy.

“Your hair’s getting long,” Roy said fondly as he ran his fingers through it. “You look so pretty.” The compliment made Danny glow. His hair always being a huge part of his identity.

As much as he hated breaking a sweet moment, Danny couldn’t ignore it. “You look stressed,” he pouted. “Baby, are—“

“The bed is really comfy, Dad!” Ivy yelled from the bedroom. Danny’s head dropped to Roy’s shoulder in a gesture of defeat. Roy chuckled. He was almost thankful for the interruption. Roy wouldn’t hide anything from Danny, but he hated the weakness he felt whenever it came to being vulnerable.  

Danny cupped Roy’s cheek. “I’m gonna go get Ivy ready for bed then we’re gonna talk, yeah?” Danny sought out Roy’s eyes.

“Yeah,” Roy answered. “I’ll just be here. Doing this,” he waved his ‘Everybody’s talking about Jamie’ script before plopping down on the couch with it.

Danny had their luggage sent up to Roy’s room a few minutes after they arrived. He got Ivy into her pajamas, tucking her into Roy’s bed. “She’s so tired,” Danny said as he joined Roy on the couch.

“It’s a hard flight,” Roy commented. His eyes never leaving his Jamie script.

Danny sighed. “When are you gonna realize that doesn’t work with me?” He took the script right out Roy’s hands, placing it on the coffee table. He slid Roy’s glasses off of his face. “Roy,” Danny reached out to take Roy’s hand into his own, “What’s going on?”

Roy coughed. Danny saw in his face that the wheels in his mind were turning. “Don’t lie to me.” It wasn’t that Roy would ever lie to Danny. Maybe he would downplay things for Danny’s sake; He never wanted to put the burden of worrying about him on Danny’s shoulders.

Roy decided to tell Danny everything. As much as his instinct was to protect, he knew there wasn’t much to a relationship if he wouldn’t be open and honest with his partner. “Where do you want me to start?” Roy sounded solemn, though Danny was sure he was trying to—and failed at making a joke of his own pain.

“Anywhere,” Danny answered simply, giving Roy’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

Roy’s lips curved into a weak smile for a second or two. He huffed, his thumb ran over the back of Danny’s hand to distract himself as he started. “This is all getting to be a lot,” Roy’s voice was quiet, meeker than Danny had ever heard it. “I don’t wanna be out here for months on end without my family. I don’t even recognize you guys when I see you anymore, that’s how long I’m away at a time. I’m scared to death of what that’s doing to Ivy, to you and I. I hate leaving you to take care of her by yourself. We decided to have her, I should be there every single day with you guys. I want to be there everyday. The fact that I still have a month of this play left, then months of tour after…,” Roy looked off into the distance; The expression on his face as if he saw a monster. He just shook his head, not having the energy to finish his statement.

Danny scooted closer to Roy. “Honey, that’s just for now. You’re only working like this because Kurt’s coming, it won’t be forever. Ivy understands what we do. She understands we need to work to be able to take of her and her brother.” Danny lifted Roy’s chin so he would look at him, “And I appreciate what you’re doing more than I can even tell you. Roy, you’re working yourself to death for our family. I promise you I’ll never let that get between us. It never has, and it never will. I’m okay with Ivy. You do the same thing whenever I’m touring. We’re a team. Sometimes one of us has to lean on the other a little more, that’s perfectly normal,” Danny caressed his cheek. “All you have to do is think about when Kurt gets here; How all this hard work now is making sure that we can stay at home with him and Ivy when he‘s born.”

Roy nodded his head, he sucked back a few tears. Danny could be so wise sometimes it left Roy speechless; This being one of those times. All Roy could say is, “You’re right. You’re right.” He took a breath. “It just gets so overwhelming.”

Danny kissed the back of Roy’s hand, “I know it does, Willow. I’m always here to get you through it.”

“There’s something else,” Roy spoke up. “This show is so much more grueling than I’m used to. I can’t remember steps, I can’t remember lines, I can’t remember lyrics. I see myself getting on that stage and bombing. What is everyone gonna say if I fuck up? Me? The person who has something to say about everyone. If I pull a Valentina I might as well bury my head in the sand and never come back up.”

Danny scoffed. Roy laced his eyebrows together at his reaction. “Now you’re just being dramatic. Roy, you can do this shit in your sleep. Hello, Hurricane Bianca? All of season six? You played Angel in Rent when you were a baby, you asshole! You’ll be fine. This is your nerves being little bitches. You just need to relax.” Danny smirked at him. He ran his hand up Roy’s thigh, his fingers tightening around Roy’s bulge. “Can I help you relax?”

Roy let out a shaky breath. Normally, he didn’t allow himself any rest or relaxation. He’d push Danny away. Tell him he needed to concentrate, but right now Danny’s company seemed like exactly what Roy needed. “You know what, yeah. That sounds perfect.”

Danny visibly perked up. “Really? You’re usually not into it.”

Roy shrugged his shoulders. “I miss you. I need you more than I need to read that stupid script right now.”

The desire in Roy’s voice made Danny’s eyes go dark. He guided Roy to lay back while he took his position between Roy’s legs. Each hand slid up Roy’s thighs. “Are you gonna let me take care of you?” Danny was like a siren. He opened his mouth and turned you to putty. ”Because I wanna give you everything,” he licked his lips, that familiar devious tint in his eyes.

Roy swallowed hard, nodding at Danny. Danny just smiled, more than giddy with himself. He climbed off the couch, Roy watched him in confusion. “Sit up,” Danny directed. His lover obeyed without question. Danny always loved how Roy would do whatever he said with no hesitation. He was fond of the trust between them.

Danny mounted Roy. He started grinding his crotch down against Roy’s, making the man groan. Roy’s hand rested on the small of Danny’s back, his fingers pressing into Danny’s flesh as Danny ground on top of him. “I miss you too,” Danny returned Roy’s words from before, leaning in to catch his lips in a series of soft kiss. Danny liked to build Roy up slowly before pushing him over the edge.

For a while they just kissed. Tongues eventually found their way into mouths. Hands were groping and pulling at hair. They had become hard from their grinding. Danny nibbled at Roy’s bottom lip, sucking and tugging at it. His eyes flicked up at Roy when he let his lip go from between his teeth. The redness left behind made Danny’s heart skip a beat.

Danny moved closer to attach his lips to Roy’s jawline. He kissed a path up the sharp bone, pressing a sloppy kiss behind Roy’s ear that made Roy shiver. “Undress me,” Danny whispered in his ear. The words shot straight to Roy’s cock. He shifted at how tight his pants were becoming.

Roy lifted Danny’s shirt over his head to reveal a chain bra. Roy vividly remembered telling Danny how hot he thought it was when he first saw Danny wear it for a photoshoot. He always promised Roy he would wear it for him one day.

“So how’d you sneak this pass TSA?” Roy teased.

“I put it on in the bathroom after I got Ivy to bed, duh,” Danny threw it right back at him. Roy smiled, shaking his head at his fiancé. He continued to undress him, his fingers just getting Danny’s jeans unbuttoned before Danny turned around in his lap. He laid back against him, his head thrown back against Roy’s shoulder. Danny took Roy’s hands, guiding them to his abdomen. He let them rest there for a moment, allowing Roy to feel how just his touch had Danny’s muscles jumping.

He slowly guided them up his stomach, triggering a stream of quiet moans being let out right into Roy’s ear. His eyes nearly rolled back at the sound. Danny brought Roy’s hands up to his chest. There was a stark contrast between the cold chain and Danny’s supple nipples. Danny moved Roy’s hands in a circular motion, getting him to massage his breasts. Danny choked at the intimacy of it.

His eyes were closed. A look of bliss on Danny’s face convinced Roy to continue the ministrations on his own. He continued to grope at one of Danny’s pecks while the other hand gently brushed his nipple. The younger whimpered, his body pushing into Roy’s. “You‘re the most amazing thing in the world,” Roy praised his lover.

Danny had gotten carried away; Allowed too much of the attention to be on himself. It was so easy with Roy. Roy was an effortless lover when it came to Danny. He knew every weakness and every button that made Danny go wild—But this was about Roy. Danny knew he’d have to watch Roy, who was generous to fault in bed.

Danny removed Roy’s hands from his body. He slid down to the floor, arching his back so his perfectly round ass was in Roy’s face. Danny was no rookie himself. He had Roy unbutton his pants so they would fall around his hips when he did this, revealing a lace thong he was wearing under them.

Roy watched in awe. His mouth dry and hanging wide open. Danny managed to gracefully roll onto his knees. He ran his hands up his torso then through his hair. As Danny stood his pants fell to a pool around his ankles that he easily stepped out of before kicking to the side. His eyes locked with Roy’s as he started to sway his hips. Roy had to squeeze his legs shut at the pressure he felt building. He could already feel precum wetting his boxers.

There were two little bow ties on each side of Danny’s underwear. He started to play with one until it came undone, then the other side until the same thing happened. The underwear fell to the ground as well. Roy was so enthralled that he let out a hardy moan at the sight of Danny’s cock.

While Roy’s eyes didn’t know whether to focus on his fiancé’s gorgeous dick or his beautiful face, Danny didn’t stop looking directly into his eyes. He took his cock into his own hand, lightly jerking it as he approached Roy. It didn’t take much to get Danny to start leaking. He mounted Roy again, swiping the precum from his head then slipping his fingers into Roy’s mouth.

Roy happily sucked them dry, staring at Danny the entire time. Danny was so pleased with himself. Any distress Roy had been feeling had to be the furthest thing from his mind right now. “Are you ready, my love?” Danny asked with his bottom lip between his teeth.

“I am,” Roy said so eagerly it made Danny giggle.

Danny pressed his lips to Roy’s tenderly. When he broke away, he told him to lie down. They were back in the position they started in, except this time with a very naked Danny—Save for the bra he kept on for Roy’s enjoyment.

He didn’t waste much time getting Roy out of his pants and boxers. The man sighed at the relief of his boner no longer being constrained. Danny looked up at Roy for one more sign of consent, taking it in the form of a happy nod.

He ran his tongue up the underside of Roy’s cock. Roy letting out a satisfied groan. Danny took Roy into his hand, pressing sloppy, open mouthed kisses all the way up his shaft to the head. He made sure to watch Roy’s face as he teasingly licked his tip just once. Roy squirmed for more. Danny lazily licked at his slit once or twice at a time, enjoying all the whining he wasn’t used to hearing from Roy.

“You’re fucking hot,” Danny mumbled as his mouth gave attention Roy’s inner thighs. He sucked, bit, and kissed at them while his hand stroked Roy’s cock with a firm grip. Roy bucked into Danny’s fist. His senses going crazy at finally being touched again.

Danny took one last bite at Roy’s thigh before giving Roy what he was so desperately waiting for. Danny closed his mouth around Roy’s cockhead. He focused on lavishing it with attention. His tongue swirled all over him, hips lips sucked at the sensitive area. Roy had to stop his hips from slamming into Danny’s mouth. Danny slipped a hand between Roy’s legs to cup his balls, massaging and squeezing them just how Roy always loved.

Roy choked. His hands were now in Danny’s hair, tangling in and tugging at the brunette tresses. “Please, Danny,” Roy whimpered. In that moment Danny knew Roy was gone. He almost never begged, no matter how relentlessly Danny teased him.

Thankfully for Roy, Danny was in the mood to please, not tease. He deepthroated Roy’s cock, allowing him to hit the back of his throat. A deep, loud moan escaped from the pit of Roy’s stomach as Danny started swallowing around him. “Fuck, Danny, Baby,” He sputtered as Danny sucked him off.

Danny kept Roy down his throat for as long as he could. He licked every inch of Roy’s thick cock that his tongue could reach. He moaned around him, sending vibrations through Roy’s body and goosebumps flaring on his skin.

A string of spit followed when Danny had to release Roy for air. He gagged for a moment, still jerking Roy off as he did so. Roy’s hands were affectionately running through Danny’s hair. “You okay?”

Danny nodded his head, not sure he could rely on his voice to give an answer.

“Don’t push yourself too much,” Roy said. Danny nodded again. He had seemed to be taking a breather, lazily stroking Roy’s cock while he caught his breath.

“There’s water on the coffee table. It’s probably a bit warm, but—“ Danny reached for the glass as soon as Roy said water. He chugged half of it, passing the rest of it to Roy who downed it just as quickly.

It was as if they didn’t miss a beat once their break was done with. Danny had taken Roy’s dick back into his mouth, this time bobbing his head up and down Roy’s length. Roy moaned louder with every pass of Danny’s warm mouth. His breathing growing heavier as sweat starting dripping down his forehead.

Danny looked up pleased as he could be at the sight. He smirked around Roy before deciding to deepthroat him again. “Oh my God, Danny,” the words came through gritted teeth. Roy’s thighs began to quiver as Danny kept him in for as long as possible.

While Roy was still in his mouth, Danny dragged his nails lightly over Roy’s skin. Faint pink scratches painted his stomach and thighs. Roy’s body twisted into Danny’s touch, constantly begging him for more.

Danny began bobbing his head again. The unexpected change made Roy’s body jolt. While Danny used one hand to dig his nails into Roy’s thigh, the other slipped under his shirt to twist his nipple. The combination made Roy choke.

Roy could feel himself getting close. Danny must have tasted the precum on his tongue as he starting jerking Roy as he sucked him off. His nails left indentations in the delicate flesh of Roy’s inner thigh, only letting up so he could focus them on teasing Roy’s balls.

Roy was completely wanton for Danny. His legs were spread wide open. His body bending into and thrashing at every sensation Danny was making him feel. His head was throw back, mouth wide open while gorgeous sounds peppered with grunts of Danny’s name tumbled from his bite-swollen lips.

Danny slowly pulled Roy out of his mouth, his plump lips gliding up Roy’s length sent his lover to heaven. He didn’t allow Roy time to miss the feeling of his mouth as he started massaging Roy’s head. He used his thumb to rub circles over the sensitive area.

Danny leaked onto the couch cushions as he watched Roy approach his orgasm. The man was a beautiful mess of sweat and whimpers. He must have lost control of his body long ago as it seemed to be acting on it’s own accord. In addition to his thumb massaging the tip, Danny allowed his tongue the swipe at Roy’s slit. Roy’s back arched, his stomach muscles twitching.

Roy’s precum dripped down Danny’s hand. He had no question that Roy would be cumming soon. Just the thought made Danny’s neglected cock ache more than it already did. His free hand travelled between his legs, only stopping when he felt a sharp yank on his hair that made him moan.

Danny looked up to see Roy staring at him with such a hunger it made Danny whimper. Roy pulled on Danny’s hair harshly, forcing Danny to crawl over his body. Roy was only satisfied when their lips were brushing over each other’s. Roy kissed Danny sweetly, a total contrast to the hand still wrapped tightly in Danny’s hair.  

“You’re beautiful,” Roy said between kisses. “I need you, angel,” he pulled Danny’s head back by his hair. “Can I have you?”

Danny smirked, “I thought you’d never ask.” Danny had prepared just in case. He was thankful a flight of starvation wasn’t put to waste—Not that they ever had anything he could eat anyway. “I got lube in my suitcase,” he said, prompting Roy to let his hair go so he could get it. Danny’s legs wobbled when he first stood. He had to grab the arm of the couch for balance. Roy made a mental note not to try to get up anytime soon.

Thankfully Danny’s suitcases were still sat at the door. He didn’t have the will to carry his own luggage into the bedroom once he carried Ivy’s.

Danny pounced on Roy as soon as he found the lube at the bottom of his suitcase. Their lips smacked together, their bodies pressed against each other—Which reminded Danny—He pulled Roy’s shirt over his head. The tank top drenched in Roy’s sweat now joined Danny’s clothing on the floor. Danny let his hands run wild over Roy’s body. He missed touching him so much.

Roy leaned forward to suck on Danny’s nipples through the opening in his bra. His hands moved down to Danny’s ass, groping at his full cheeks. “Can I mark you?” Roy asked, detaching himself from Danny’s skin to seek out an answer.

“Yes,” Danny whined breathily. Roy’s mouth was back on him a second later, sucking hickeys into his chest. While Roy left a trail of love bites from Danny’s nipple to his neck, his fingers slipped between Danny’s asscheeks. The combination of Roy’s mouth suckling his neck while his fingers teased his hole made Danny’s eyes roll into the back of his skull. “Fuck me,” Danny drawled out as his head fell back. “God, Roy, fuck me.”

Asking twice wasn’t necessary. Roy had Danny on all fours before Danny even processed how he got into the position. Roy coated his fingers with lube, slipping two inside of Danny right off the bat. “Is that okay?” Roy asked as he scissored them inside of him.

“We can—“ Danny’s sentence broke off into a moan. “We can skip this. Roy, just take me.”

Roy was a bit hesitant. He rubbed Danny’s lower back soothingly. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Roy took Danny’s word for it. Danny knew his own limits better than anyone. “You tell me if you change your mind,” Roy said as he slicked his cock with lube. The feeling of his hand on himself made him hiss. He knew he wouldn’t be lasting long at all. He was already dangerously close when Danny was stroking his dick.

Roy pressed the head of his cock against Danny’s hole, pouring more lube directly onto Danny just to be safe. Roy gently pushed into Danny. The pressure of his lovers tight asshole surrounding him had Roy seeing stars. His fingers dig into Danny’s hips as he pushed further inside, his breathing growing heavy again.

Danny wasn’t as reserved as Roy. He let out a high pitched moan as soon as Roy was halfway in. Just like Roy, Danny knew he wouldn’t last long. He felt like he could’ve finished without so much as a touch as long as Roy was getting off.

Roy started thrusting leisurely. Danny whined and whimpered beneath him. Roy bit his lip to compose himself, his fingers digging harder into Danny’s pale skin.  

Roy picked up the pace once he felt confident that Danny was adjusted to his size. A loud slapping noise filled the room as Danny’s ass bounced against Roy’s V-line. Roy ran his hands over Danny’s back as he pounded away at him, low moans tumbling from his lips.

Danny did his best to keep up with Roy. He threw his ass back, meeting Roy half way as they fucked. On a random thrust Roy hit Danny’s prostate. His favorite sound had to be that high pitched whine Danny let out without fail every time. Roy focused his thrusts on that spot, hitting deeper inside of Danny every few passes. “Oh my god,” Danny’s voice was nothing but a barely audible whimper.

As Roy got closer his thrusts got wilder. His hands moved from Danny’s hips to his shoulders, using the leverage to thrust into Danny as deeply as possible. Danny bottomed out, his legs trembling uncontrollably. Roy let Danny’s shoulder’s go, resulting in Danny collapsing against the cushions. He didn’t have enough strength to hold himself up.

Roy lowered himself so that his chest was pressed against Danny’s back. The lovers moaned in unison as Roy fucked into him. Roy positioned his legs in a way that Danny would have to spread his a bit more, that change allowed Roy even better access to Danny—Who’s vision was starting to fade.

Roy peppered open mouth kisses to Danny’s cheek. Half of his face was pressed into the couch, his mouth wide open in a pant while his skin blushed pinker and pinker by the second. Roy sped up his thrusting, Danny’s moaning was nothing but a strangled noise at this point.

Roy teetered on the edge of his own release. His bit into his bottom lip to stave off his orgasm. “Danny,” Roy’s voice was destroyed and his tone desperate. “Can you kneel?”

Danny groaned in a way that let Roy know he couldn’t. Roy took a deep breath, mustering all the strength he had left in his body. Roy sat up, grabbing a fist full of Danny’s hair he pulled his lover up as well. Danny whimpered, “I’m gonna fall.”

“I got you, angel. Lean against me.” Danny did as he was told, leaning his entire body weight against Roy. Roy wrapped an arm around Danny’s stomach to keep him steady. Danny threw his arm around Roy’s neck for extra support.

Danny cried out when Roy started thrusting again, the surprise of Roy’s hand stroking his dick catching him off guard. Roy chased his own release, sure that Danny wouldn’t be too far behind him. “Can you cum with me, angel?”

“Mhm,” Danny whined, his arm tightening around Roy’s neck as he felt his orgasm approaching. Danny tried to hold himself off, but his body just couldn’t do it. “I’m gonna cum,” he squeaked out, covering Roy’s hand in streaks of it as he climaxed. Danny’s body stiffened against Roy’s, his thighs turning to jelly as they trembled. The pulsing of his asshole, and a few more thrusts were all Roy needed to reach his release as well.

Roy moaned Danny’s name as he shot his load inside of Danny’s hole. Danny was going limp in Roy’s arms as he started to come down. Roy’s legs shook with his orgasm; Both factors causing Roy to fall backwards with Danny onto the couch.

Thankfully they didn’t hurt themselves. “Do you need me to move?” Danny’s voice was something of a raspy whisper as he asked Roy, afraid he might be crushing him.

“It’s fine,” Roy replied, sounding ravaged and exhausted. Danny always felt a smugness when it was obvious in his lovers voice that he had just been fucked. Roy wrapped his arms around Danny’s body. “I don’t wanna move at all.”

“Me either,” Danny agreed.

They eventually maneuvered themselves to their sides so both could fit on the couch while they cuddled. “I’m glad you guys came to visit,” Roy said as he peppered kisses to Danny’s bare back.

“We missed you, babe. Ivy wanted to see you on your opening night.”

“I missed you guys, too. If you’re up for it we can take her to rehearsals. You both can watch if you want.”

Danny smiled at how shyly Roy asked. “Of course I’m up for it. I’m sure Ivy’ll wanna go too.”

Roy nuzzled Danny’s back. He reached over his fiancé to grab the throw blanket that decorated the couch, pulling it over them in case Ivy came looking for them in the morning.

“I can’t believe she stole our bed again,” Danny said.

“You know we can just get dressed and go sleep in there, right?”

“Too much moving,” Danny complained. He settled in Roy’s embrace, squishing as close to him as possible. “Night, Willow,” Danny yawned. “I love you.”

“Night,” Roy pressed a final kiss to Danny’s shoulder. “I love you.”

#rpdr fanfiction #biadore #adore delano #bianca del rio #smut #fluff #angst #lemonade #canon compliant #parenting au

[themaybewoman]

Anthony “Tony” Stark, age 21, reads eulogy at his parents funeral on Dec. 22, 1991

or, in other words, the fanfiction I write at 00:14 because the idea of Tony being and angery smol at his parents funeral wouldn’t leave my head as I was trying to sleep. Pre-Series, duh. FYI: I didn’t edit, just wrote and posted, so please ignore the switching of tenses. I’m exhausted and too impatient to edit. Thank.

“Okay, so…”

The boy at the stand swallowed nervously. He never got nervous, never. Teachers loved and hated that about him, peers admired that about him, and his best friend, Rhodey, rolled his eyes at that fact about him. Here and now, standing before the gathering of people his parents’ lives had touched, Tony felt too small for the pulpit, too weak for words on the page before him, and too emotionally-charged to think clearly. In the front row, right where Tony could see, sat the only two people who mattered to him. There was Rhodey, his best friend and brother, and Obadiah, the figure more fatherly than his own father.

“I’m gonna use a, uh, script this time,” he said, lifting the page off the pulpit enough for the audience to see. “I don’t– can’t really remember…” He shook his head. “You know what? I’m just going to start. Yeah, I’m gonna start.”

He took in a deep breath.

“It’s funny that, um, the last time you see someone, you usually don’t think it’s going to be like that. I mean, I was just on the couch after some big flight in when Dad walks in and suddenly announces he’s going someplace, and he’s taking Mom, too? I mean, not surprising. It always happens. Since ever, I could hardly get a, uh, a moment alone, you know… with him…”

Tony sighs. The air leaves his mouth through his top and bottom front teeth. His tightly-wound jar turn the sound into a crisp but soft blast, like two pieces of cardboard sliding suddenly across each other. “You know what…?” he mumbles, but it is loud enough that the front three rows can hear him. He surveys the audience before looking down at the page in front of him. None of the words felt right. Absolutely none. He sneers at the paragraphs, then lifts his head up to regard each and every face bearing into him. He normally loved the spotlight. Today, he hated it. As usual, he buried that deep-set hatred and proceeded in a manner he always strove to be” completely aloof.

"Sometimes, I feel like I hardly even knew my Dad, for starters. Everyone else probably knew him way better, what with all the newsreels and shit. Surely, a father should have some time to spend with his son?” He left the question hanging, but the way he pronounced every goddamned syllable made the answer crystal clear: not MY dad. “Mom could always bring him down for a bit. Almost always. Half the time. Well. Whatever.”

Tony shrugged. He hoped everyone was drinking in his heartless act. He was NOT sad. He was NOT sad! He refused to feel even the edge of sorrow with the tip of his toe.

“I guess if she had to go, he better, too, because god or whatever forbid I have to stand him alone.”

His words were even MORE clipped than before, his voice hard as iron, his jaw as rigid as stone. He never realised just how much anger boiled inside him. It churned like a hurricane trapped and straining to be free. Dark grey storm clouds. Lightning flashing. Winds hurtling around a central point at hundreds of miles per hour. The faces in front of him blinked; some gasped and others glared. Rhodes was giving him a both pained and fierce, shut up now! look. Obie merely shook his head at nothing in particular, but Tony knew. Brown eyes flicked down at the page and jumped in their sockets to find the page crumpled in a tight fist, knuckles already turning from red to white. He couldn’t even see the residual red marks from yesterday’s fit of repeatedly striking the wall.

He totally clenched his fingers around the page and dragged it off the podium. His teeth ground together.

“I’m not–“ –he gulped down a sob, but his sentence derailed before he could get a handle on such an emotional outburst. “To my dead parents, everyone,” he spat.

Nothing and no one stopped him as he stomped down from the stand, down the aisle, and kicked open the door at the very end. The heavy slab of mahogany slammed into the exterior wall with an ear-shattering bang, but Tony remained the only one who didn’t jump in shock or fear (or both) at the sound.

“Thanks for nothing,” he muttered darkly, hoping the words might catch in the wind and blow to wherever dead souls gathered. He wanted his father to know, without a doubt, how much it sucked to be here without a decent memory to hold onto. Everything sucked.

Life sucked.

So, he hid himself behind a particularly large trunk of a tree and let loose the tears he promised he would never show anyone, not even the audience inside.

Especially not them.

#tony stark #mcu #tonystarkedit #fanfiction #james rhodes #howard stark #maria stark #obadiah stane #marvel #my characters #pre-series #howard and maria's funeral #lilly writes #writing #tony's parents' funeral #ff.net #ao3 #fanfic #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #enjoy! #hope you cry! #I like writing feels #feels #all the feels #happy fathers day #I say weakly #as I try to avoid your pointed glares #fathers day feels

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #210

“made of flame, made of mud, i’m the many, i’m the one.”

Did your parents live in a different country before you were born? No. Do you have a preferred coffee brand? No. What’s something you’ve experienced that very few others have? Your favorite human on Planet Earth/God Himself noticing you. :') Three days I couldn't sleep. Three. Days. Do you have to wear an identification badge at your job? I don't have a job, yet. Have you ever dated someone who was terrible with money? No. If so, how did it affect the relationship? N/A How often do you paint your nails? Never. Do you know anyone who’s related to a current or former world leader? I'm related to Queen Victoria somehow. Idk about anyone else. Do you do your own taxes, or do you hire a professional? No job, no taxes yet. What is something you don’t have any natural talent for? Mathematics. Has anyone ever told you that you get too competitive over minor things? No. Do you usually befriend your coworkers, or do you prefer to keep work separate from your personal life? N/A What was the very first thing you ever saved up to buy with your own money? I think Venus. Describe your favorite Christmas ornament. Man, I have a lot. We've accumulated A LOT over the years between me and all my siblings. Mom gets each of us one every year, and she's also kept all the ones we've made throughout school. She's so cute y'all. There is this REALLY damn pretty swirling crystal one with an angel on the top of it I got from my grandmother, that's definitely one of my faves, I've always loved this lil gingerbread dude I made in pre-k, and... idk man, there are truly a lot. What is something you frequently forget? To turn the laundry room light off anytime I go in there at night for Roman's litter scooper or to bring dirty clothes in there. By this point it's like a joke in the house with how much I do it for whatever reason. How do you feel about your body? I hate it. Who is someone you would like to get to know better? Connie, but I respect her privacy. I know you have to be careful online. What’s your opinion on assisted suicide? For it. At what point do you consider a relationship to be ‘long-term?’ Hm, idk, really. A year? What jobs did your parents have when you were growing up? Mom worked with special ed kids at school, she had a job at the hospital doing computer work I can't remember because I was so young, Dad's been a mailman all my life, but he also worked at Lowe's as a carpenter I think for a while. Do they still have these jobs? Or different jobs? Or have they retired? Mom's got a totally different job, and I already mentioned Dad being a mailman. Do you have any recurring dreams? Themes, yes; dreams, no. Have you ever had to call 911? Why? Yes; Mom and I thought she was having a heart attack. Terrifuckingfying morning. Do you get out a lot? I might as well be on fucking house arrest. I can stay in the house and go nowhere for over a week. Do you eat a lot of vegetables? No. Last fast food you ate? I had a Hardee's biscuit for breakfast. Do you live in Canada? No. What do you think when you see two members of your preferred sex kissing? It's sweet, and brave considering the assholes of the world. Is that hot? "For fuck’s sake… It bothers the hell out of me when people fangirl over homosexual couples. It’s so disrespectful." <<< THIS. Would you ever want to be a chef? No. Bonfires: Y/N? They're fun. What’s a food that’s famous in your hometown/state/country/etc? Southern cooking, like fried chicken, mashed potatoes, hushpuppies, pulled pork, nasty shit like that. By pure coincidence, I literally hate almost all the "traditional" Southern foods. When’s that last time you saw snow? January this year. I think it was January... What’s something that you think will become obsolete in the next 50 years? Physically driving cars, probably. Are you efficient or do you procrastinate a lot? I procrastinate all to hell. Who are the 3 people you love the most? Mom, Sara, and then... idk if I can pick #3. Last person you slept in the same bed with? Sara. When was your first kiss? March 2012. Have you recently been sick? No. What song are you listening to? "Break My Mind" by dAGAMES. Would you marry someone if they were unable to have sex? Yeah. Have you ever made a boyfriend or girlfriend cry? Sadly. Does heartbreak really feel as bad as it sounds? It's worse. Weed, coke, crack, heroin, oxy, acid, x, k, peyote, mushrooms, opium…How many of these have you tried? I have no clue what like three of these even are lmao. None. How long has it been since you had sex? Like over three years. Who was the last person to call you babe? Probably Sara. Last reason you went to the ER? My sister got in a wreck. Were you a planned pregnancy for your parents? I believe so. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? Yeah. When was the last time you shaved your legs? It's been many months. My legs are AWFUL, but it is an absolute chore to shave or use Nair because my hair is so long and thick. So I figure if there's very little/no chance someone's going to see my legs, why even do it. I really wanna get laser hair removal on my legs when I can afford it, though. What facial cleanser do you use? A Biore charcoal scrub. If someone wanted to know what you smelt like, what should they smell? I don't know? Probably dogs, lmao? How many purses do you own? One I use, then I have... two or three old ones saved just because I really like them. What are your top five favorite stores to clothes shop? Hot Topic, Rebel's Market, Spencer's, rue21, and... idk. I guess Wal-Mart lmao. What kind of clothes do you mostly wear? Yoga/dance/sweatpants with a tank top, graphic tee, or band tee. What about shoes? Flip flops like, year-round lol. If I do wear something else for whatever reason, it'll probably be my Vans or maybe a pair of Converse. Have you ever cheated on the significant other that you have now? No. For that one week a month, do you hate being a woman? Nah, birth control's made cramping a far smaller problem. Last thing you bought at the mall? Wow, I have no idea. Well... maybe a book before the hurricane to read if the power went out? I haven't read it if you're wondering, aha... Do your parents like your boyfriend/girlfriend? Yeah. Dad's met her once, but he seemed to enjoy her just fine, and Mom adores her. What store did you last buy clothes from? Wal-Mart. Which parent are you more similar to? I have traits aligning with each of them. I think my mom, but then again, I don't see my dad nearly enough to know his personality deeply since he changed IMMENSELY after the divorce. Have you ever been to another country’s capital city? No. What are some of your favorite qualities for another person to have? Compassion, wisdom, an open mind, gentle, passionate, a good sense of humor... What smell reminds you of your childhood? Chlorine, I guess. I swam a LOT as a kid; it was my favorite activity. Are you happy with who you are? In some ways, in some ways no. Do you ever sleep with your bedroom windows open? No; we live beside a busy road, and plus I don't trust people. Have you ever had a job where you didn’t fit in with your coworkers? No. What was the last word document you typed? I made a brief outline of the message I'm sending to the client who hired me for her wedding when I send her her pictures. Thanking her and telling her what more I could do for her, stuff like that. What’s something that has upset you lately? The extreme difficulty of finding a job for myself... Do you have a home security system? No, but damn do I want one. What’s something you don’t think people take seriously enough? If you know the darker part of my photography, roadkill. People see it and either think 1.) "poor thing" or 2.) "dumb thing," and that's it. No one seems to truly consider our responsibility to watch for animals on the road; in most instances I've seen, the animal is blamed for being "stupid." No, they're fucking terrified and panicking. Anyway, I'm going on a tangent. Basically, I think we should feel far more pity for what we end, even though it's accidental. And get out of the fucking car to see if it's okay/can be saved. Have you ever gotten sick from someone else’s cooking? I believe so, but I don't really blame the cook. My stomach is just REALLY sensitive to food it's not used to, particularly fancier meals. What was the last kind of cheese you ate? American. How young is too young to be sexually active? "Personally, I think anything under 18." <<< Same. Would you ever dye your hair silver? I wanted to at some point, but particularly with my hairstyle now, idk how good it'd look. What was the last fun thing you did? Shot a wedding. Have you ever dated someone who had a child from a previous relationship? No. Is there any drama currently going on with your family? No. What’s your favorite kind of soup? I'm not a fan. Do you know anyone who practices Hinduism? No. How long was your longest relationship? Three and a half years. When was the last time you spoke to the first person you ever kissed? February 2017. What’s a political issue you have a strong opinion on? Gay rights. What snacks do you like to get at the movie theater? Just popcorn is fine. If I have any candy, it's from a gas station or dollar store. Movie theater prices are expensive as fuck. Have you ever stayed in a hotel in the center of a big city? No. What was the last fruit or vegetable you chopped/sliced up? Romaine lettuce for my iguana. When you take a nap, do you nap in bed or on the couch? In bed. Do you have any friends you have never gotten into an argument with? Yeah, Connie. Girt and I have also never really had an argument, he's just said things that hurt me as his sense of humor can be a bit harsh and they were sensitive areas, but he's never meant it. Do you think you could survive living by yourself for a month? No. Can you cook anything other then toast? Yeah. How many times have you cried over the last person you cried over?  I don’t remember the last person that I cried over. Have you ever been in an on-and-off relationship? So annoying right? No. Have you ever developed a crush on someone the first day you met them? I don’t think so. Have you ever been with someone who was really clingy? Did it annoy you? For only two weeks. I like to pretend that shit never happened. Is there a store you go to so much the employees know your name? The tattoo/piercing parlor I go to know me well; some probably remember my name. Do you have any friends who never shut up about their boyfriend/girlfriend? One literally only talks to me if she wants to ramble endlessly about him. Have you ever helped someone while they were drunk puking? No. There is NO way I could be with someone while they're vomiting. The sound would make me join in, and that's almost a promise. What annoys you more to do, sneeze or cough? Cough. Would you rather have a pet snake or a pet cat? I want another snake. Do you fall for all the lines about making guys/girls like you on magazine covers? Lmao yeah right. Do you have a calendar in your room? What’s it’s theme? My door is currently open so I can't see for sure, but I have three or four outdated meerkat calendars as decoration. Have you ever gotten anything racist about you yelled at you? No. Does the last person whose house you were at like anyone? She's married, so obviously. Do you own more pink or black clothes? Just about everything is black. Has a boyfriend/girlfriend ever given you a stuffed animal? Yeah. What does the last body wash you used smell like? I think it's some kind of ocean-y scent? I don't pay attention. I just know it's blue. What is the worst name anyone has ever called you? A martyr, and not the good kind. Where is your favorite place to eat out? Sonic. Does it bother you when people call you ‘ma'am’ or 'sir?’ No. That's general good manners in the South. Have you ever been obsessed with a television character? I don't think so, but maybe? What was the last thing that changed your life completely? Recovery. Do you have any step siblings? One. I don't call him my brother, though. Did you partake in senior skip days? HA I sure did. Have you ever read the Christian Bible? Not the entire thing. When the holidays come around, do you help decorate? Yeah. Has someone ever promised not to leave you? NEVER IN YOUR FUCKING LIFE BELIEVE THAT SHIT. Do you have a part-time job? No. Are you the type of person who likes to buy gifts for your friends? If I had my own money, I absolutely would. Hopefully I can when I have a job... though I don't exactly have many people to send anything to. Have you ever lived in an apartment before? I wasn't an actual resident, though I was pretty much always there. Have you ever been questioned by the police? No. Are you close to your parents? Yeah. Have you ever had to be put on medicine for a mental disorder? For most of my life. Have you ever been responsible for someone’s death? Wow, no. Do you ever spend the night with your significant other? Well, we're long distance. We do when we visit each other. Do you know a lot about serial killers? No. Have the police ever been looking for you? Ha ha yes, but only because my sister, friend, and I went walking on the beach at night, and apparently Mom didn't hear us when we told her we were going... Have you ever been in a car accident? Yes. Do you cuss more than any one else you know? Tbh probably lmao. How old is your youngest cousin? I don't know. Do you tend to talk on the phone a lot? No. Have there ever been any serial killers around your hometown? I don't believe so. When was the last time you went to a museum? When my brother and nephew were here early this month. Do you know how to shoot a gun and hit a target? No. What turns you on the most? Don't grab my boobs. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yes. Do you answer the phones at your work? N/A What’s your ring tone? The Revaleso remix of "Dear Insanity" by Asking Alexandria. The text alert sound is the chime of picking up a gem in Spyro. Do you want to fix anything with anyone? Yeah. Did you wake up in the middle of the night last night? I do literally every night. It sucks. What shows do you watch? None. Do you know anyone who has been arrested? Yes. When you were in elementary school, did you change best friends a lot? No. Have you ever suspected anyone of cheating on you? No. Who was the last person to give you a ride somewhere? My VR counselor drove me home the other day. What’s the scariest bug you’ve ever seen? I'm sure some kind of beetle. Not a fan of beetles. What was your favorite TV show you watched as a kid? Pokemon. :') How many times a day do you tell your parents you love them? Mom, at least once when she leaves for work. Dad, I barely ever see him, so. I don't daily. Ever talk to your pets? Of course I do. I talk to them like I talk to people. Do you think it’s alright if people baby talk to babies? ... Yes???? At a certain age you need to set an example to talk correctly, as the kid is going to copy you, but as a baby, no shit it's fine? Ever take a nap in a hammock? I may have fallen asleep, maybe not. Probably not tho 'cuz I would've been afraid of bugs (the hammock was between two trees directly outside the woods in our backyard), so I've likely just dozed for a bit, if anything. Who’s the best character in Rugrats? Oh boy, I don't remember them all. I know I liked Tommy, but I mean, he was the main character, so I guess that's to be expected for a little kid, mostly seeing him. Ever get caught doing something naughty with your boyfriend/girlfriend? No. Who has had the biggest impact on your life? Jason. Girls: ever wear boxers? Guys: ever wear a thong? No. Do you use q-tips to clean your ears? DON'T DO THAT. I got wax adhered to both eardrums because I did that frequently; it inevitably pushed things back and dried onto them. NOT fun getting it sucked out; hurts like a bitch. Always only use them for the outside of your ears. This has been a PSA. Ever want to make out with someone, anyone, didn’t matter who? No. Ever had your feelings hurt when you knew the person was joking? That is EASY, friendo. Do you make jack-o-lanterns during Halloween? Sometimes. Have you ever swam with dolphins? No. Cats, awesome pets or Satan in disguise? I love cats. When you buy/receive new clothes, do you instantly wear them or wash first? Wash them. Do you hate using public restrooms? VERY MUCH. I will avoid using one at almost all costs. What’s the weirdest item you’ve seen for sale on Ebay? Oh my fucking god. So one night my friend Chelsea and I were up REALLY late and were loopy as fuck and this bitch started looking up weird dildos and shit and I'm not even remotely kidding, she found a huge 50 lb. butt plug. I sincerely wish I was joking. Do you check to make sure there’s TP before using the restroom? Yeah. Do you drunk dial/text? I've never been drunk. Have you ever built a massive snow fort? No. We don't get enough snow here. Are parents to blame for what their kids do on the Internet? Not entirely. Do you use acronyms to remember things? I did in school. Do you take pills like Tylenol for the littlest aches and pains? No. When was the last time you went rollerskating? WOW I don't know, but it's been a long time. Do you call people “dude” a lot? Yes. Who was your favorite Ninja Turtle? I was never into them. Horror flicks make you: laugh, scream, or squirm? Out of those, I may ever only squirm at nasty shit. If you could become a doctor, what would you specialize in? Probably ophthalmology (eye doctors). The last time I went to the eye doctor, I got way too into the science and anatomy of the eyes and such. You woulda thought I saw God when I realized I could see the veins in my eyes during that "lemme shine this light straight into your eyes" tests; I thought it was SO cool. Well, I probably realized this at previous appointments, I just didn't remember. Hm, or maybe a pathologist, that'd be cool. I'm looking through a list of doctors, yes. What’s the cutest thing a little kid has ever said to/in front of you? Probably just "I love you" and stuff like that from my niece and nephew. Ha ha aw, wait... When my brother and older nephew were here, Christian exclaimed, "She's up!", like the MOMENT I moved in bed one morning. I'm so happy to say that kid loves me. He wore me the HELL out in the course of just three days, but man, I miss the lil dude now. That occasion in particular just really sticks out to me because I do not find myself good with kids, and to just hear how excited he was that I was up meant the world to me. Apparently I was fun enough. At what age do you plan on moving out? I hope in like... two more years, maybe less. I need a stable job, a car, but I also DO NOT want to live alone, so I'd want to wait until Sara was ready to move, too. I'm beyond thankful Mom isn't rushing me in the least, she seems happy I live here actually, but I don't want to be in her hair much longer nonetheless. I have to be an adult. Did any characters from TV shows scare you as a kid? Which one(s)? King Ramses from Courage the Cowardly Dog fuck-ing TERRIFIED me. His animation was unique to what was normal in the show, so that automatically stood out as different and weird, but more than anything, I was just so scared by his voice and repetitive lines. I had nightmares of that shitlord. HA HA OH MAN I REMEMBER THIS TOO: When I visited my aunt and uncle's when I was little, my family slept on the floor in a room downstairs, and there were small trees outside the window that would sway, and the outline on the curtains would make me think of him. I remember waking Mom up one night about it, and I think she gave me something for comfort, but idr what. What’s the saddest thing you’ve heard on the news recently? In my very own fucking state, consent can no longer legally be revoked when sex begins. Fuck this place. How long does it take before you trust a person? It depends on the person. It's usually a while, though. Have you ever made a time capsule? What did you put in it? Hm... I feel like I have? Wait yeah, I did in elementary school! It was a class effort. Idr where it was buried. What would you do if your mom or dad read your diary/journal/blog? My mother would be deeply concerned that my love of Mark runs as deep as it does, meanwhile my dad would be v v v confused. They would mutually be very worried of their daughter's willingness to eradicate the fools of the population and replace them all with miniature Fischfucks. Do you know anyone with a lisp? I may? I don't exactly have a lisp, but in certain words, I pronounce "s" weakly due to my tongue piercing getting in the way, but it's very mild. If you were to break a Guinness Record, which one would you try and beat? Idk. What’s the coolest item in your room? I'm not sure, I find a lot of things in here particularly cool for various reasons. Hence why it's so heavily decorated. I guess my favorite is probably the Japanese, limited edition Silent Hill: Revelation flyer I have framed on the wall. I won it in a giveaway and I love it alskdjfklajwer. I wanna collect more SH merch, man. Are you accident-prone? Yes, due to my own lack of common sense and clumsy nature. As a kid, what was your favorite activity on the playground? I BOLTED for that swing. Are huge muscles gross or sexy? I'm not a fan of extreme muscles. Have you ever fished and caught something weird? Phew, I grew up fishing all the time with Dad. I'm certain I have. Well, I caught a catfish by the eye, but only the method's weird there, lol. I still to this day feel so bad for the fella. Is old age catching up with you? In my back and knees lmao. Can you sleep through thunderstorms? Yes. Ever spent the night in a tent? Yes. Do people confide in you? Some do. Ever been around someone who makes you feel stupid? He doesn't intend to, he's just reeeaaally fucking smart. Actually, that goes for my brother, too. I knew he was very intelligent, but holy shit, when he was here last and I actually got to hear more about him, his beliefs, and general knowledge, dude's a genius. How many college degrees do you want? Either up to Bachelor's or Master's. For my career goal of being an out-in-the-field zoologist, I need the latter. Do you like animals? SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have you ever written anything longer than 10 pages? Yes; my high school senior project was at least one. There's other personal stories I wrote as a kid, too. Can you snap your fingers? Yes. Can you wink? My right eye, yes. I can with my left eye, but not without my face distorting pretty badly. What song explains how you feel about love? *shrugs* Does hardship make a person stronger? It depends on what they take from it. What comes to mind when you think of pregnancy? Ew please never. Have you ever attended a professional sporting event? Yeah, hockey games with Dad. What is your favorite brand of clothing? I don't have one. Which do you value more, intellect or work ethic? Work ethic. How well do you know the people you live with? Well, I live with my mom, who I've lived with my whole life, and we're very close, if that answers the question. Do you have any heroes? *blinks* Ever been to a cabin on a mountain? No, I wish. Ever lost your voice? At least once. Are you a cautious person? Yes. Meet Anxiety, baby. Do you enjoy comedy shows? Yeah. Do you chew gum? Sometimes, rarely. Do you think a lot when taking a shower? Not really. I just enjoy whatever music I have on. Are you currently charging your phone? No. Do you ever get razor rash? No. Are you a private person? It depends on the subject. If you straighten your hair, do you always use hair spray? N/A Do you curl your hair often? It's too short to be curled. What’s the earliest you’ve ever woken up for school? Idk. Probably around 5:00-5:30 if I was getting ready for a special day or something. Can you get ready in under 10 minutes? Yeah. Has anyone ever told you that you were a bad kisser? No. Do you like Frostys from Wendy’s? Hell yeah. Would you ever sleep in the same bed as your sibling? Sure, if we had no other choice. Ever taken a shower with someone? My little sister and I did all the time as kids, I'm guessing to save water. Would you consider yourself to be a creative person? Yes. Do you usually take a nap during the day? Yes, usually. Might you enjoy hanging out in the woods for day or two? HELL YEAH!!!!!! So long I have my camera and company, that'd be awesome!!! Do you suffer from frequent paranoia? Eh, not as badly as I used to. Two friends whom have been there for you the most? Sara and Girt. If you/your gf became pregnant accidentally, would you consider abortion? If it was my own fault for not using protection, I couldn't do it; then that's my own foolishness. I would regardless if my life was endangered, though. I do believe abortion is killing a living being once brain activity begins, but I believe in the right to put yourself first. If a complete stranger picked a fight with you, would you fight or flight? Flight if possible. Defend myself when necessary. Have you ever decided to set fire to something out of anger? No. Would you rather be a house pet or a wild animal? House pet, so long as my owner is a good one that truly loves me. Wild animal would be much more dangerous, and besides, I like the idea of companionship. Can you juggle more than two objects at once? lol I probably couldn't even juggle two. Can you function well on little to no sleep? Eh. I'm cranky for sure, but I can function. Well... depending. If I am REALLY tired, I won't be able to keep my eyes open. Do you find that it is difficult to maintain your mood? Even on medication, I'm still bipolar (not using that as an adjective; I'm legitimately diagnosed with it). My mood can change VERY quickly with tiny stimuli, but at a much, much milder degree. Have you ever listened to a group of chanting Monks? (if not you should) No, but it's cool! Two sports that you are horrible at? Tennis and volleyball. The latter mostly just hurts like a bitch. One thing that you would like to change about your life? My job situation. What was the last candy you ate? Sour gummy worms. Which decade was your favorite for fashion trends? Idk. I'm really not educated enough on what was trendy for each one. Do you like the current fashion trends? I pay no attention. Who is the strangest (or one of the strangest) person you’ve met? I won't give away his name as it's a pretty unique one, but there was a kid in high school who was certainly different in both good and bad ways. He was pretty unstable. Made his own religion. What are you struggling with currently? Finding a mfckn job. Do you forgive yourself for your mistakes? Most, I'd say. Have you ever been abused by a police officer? No. Name one friend who had a parent who was in jail. A cousin of mine. Has anyone tried to kill you and then played the victim? No? What is your favorite board game? I like Battleship and Scrabble. Can you remember the last time you played a board game? A few months back with Sara and Girt. Actually Scrabble, lol. List three traumatic memories you have. The only truly traumatic memory I have is the breakup. Well, I guess a nightmare I had with my dad kinda is too, seeing as it still affects my trust today? Have you ever been misdiagnosed with something by a bad doctor? Yup. How the fuck did I have ADHD, woman. If you don’t mind my asking, when was the last time you had diarrhea? Like about two weeks ago before my period started. That's starting to seem like a theme. Do you prefer sunny days or cloudy days? I like partly cloudy. Do you have a painful past? A good chunk of it. But I mean, who doesn't have some rough paths behind them. What was the best time of your life? Walking through Chicago with Sara and her dad one night was INCREDIBLE. Coming from the middle of nowhere into such a colossal city with all these lights and such was such a shock to me, and exploring it with them was super cool. It was cold as fuck, but still, it was fun. When was the last time you were hugged? Idk. Well, probably last time I was at Ashley's saying bye to everyone. Do you trust your doctor? Yes. Name something God has healed you of. HAHAHAHA. If applicable, how old were you when you got "saved?" I was raised into religion, so I don't know. I grew up "saved." Have you been baptized, and if so, where? Yes, at my childhood church.

#survey #quiz #questions #bored #random

[outerbankspreferences]

Mistakes Topper Thornton (Alternate Ending)

Word Count: 4178

A/N: So someone asked me to do a part two, so I did a different ending instead. Send me some request, because I’m going to spend the day tomorrow writing!!

MASTERLIST

It was three day’s before Topper was getting married. It was going to be the biggest wedding on the island. Finally, the Thornton and Cameron family coming together. This wasn’t for business, or blending families, this was simply the will of love between two people. Topper and Sarah had been together, broke up and then got back together when they came home from college. Topper went to university out west, studying pre-law while Sarah stayed home and got her nursing degree. It was about five years they weren’t together. Topper moved back home to finish his degree and started to work for law firm on the island. To say that Cynthia and Ward were ecstatic was an understatement, they had already started making business plans around their kids’ marriage. Cynthia invested in Rose’s real-estate, and Rose helped her find a new office for her clinics. Cynthia also helped Sarah get a job at the hospital.

Nothing was being left behind. When Topper and Sarah announced their engagement to everyone the planning went crazy. The engagement party was held at the country club and no expense was spared. It was obvious Rafe wasn’t getting married any time soon, and Wheezie was still too young. Sarah loved planning all the events and getting the photo’s done. She was happy to being doing all of this with Topper by her side. At one point in time, Topper was over baring for Sarah, almost too invested in pleasing her. When they were in high school the relationship didn’t work because they were on two different pages, they had two different needs. When Sarah left for college, she had a couple boyfriends but nothing really lasting, when she moved back to island, she ran into Topper at the Heyward’s grocery store and he asked her out for coffee to catch up. The rest being history.

Topper on the other hand had a serious relationship that he left out west. Y/N was everything to Topper at one point in his life. He had grown from his relationship in high school. Learning from his mistake he always tried to not be clingy towards her. She was a history major, planning on becoming a teacher. Y/N loved kids, she always dreamt of having plenty of her own. Topper and Y/N were together for almost four and half years. Y/N thought she was going to marry Topper, never imagining her life with anyone else. They had made plans together. Moving back to the Carolina’s when they both finished schools. Topper working at law firm for a while before starting his own practice, Y/N working at the high school he went too, or maybe the elementary school. They both wanted kids, Y/N wanted more then him, but they could compromise. They wanted to buy a nice house by the water, teach the kids how to surf, have a garden, maybe a dog. Everything was planned, until it wasn’t.

Y/N’s mom got sick her last year of university. Her mom had been sick a lot when she was a child, always spending time at other family’s houses growing up. She was an only child and her dad left when she was a little girl. When Y/N got the news that her mother was sick and needed her help, she didn’t question transferring to a university closer to home. In all honesty she thought about dropping out, being with her mom full time. The doctor told Y/N that this was her last fight. They thought she might’ve had 5 good years left, if they were lucky. When she told Topper this, he held her while she cried. He didn’t know a lot about her childhood, just assumed she like to keep that private, but that night she told him everything. Maybe she should have waited to bring up leaving, but she had to get everything off her chest that night. “Top, she only has a couple years left. I need to spend those with her. I need to be there for her.” Y/N tells him through tears and sniffles. “Wait, what do you mean? You’re not leaving, are you? Y/N/N, we have plans.” Topper was upset that she could so easily replace him. Not thinking twice about it. “You can come with me; we can do this together. I’m not sure if I can do this without you. Please Top, come with me. I need you.” She looked into his eyes and got the answer she wasn’t looking for. She saw anger and hurt. This wasn’t the Topper she fell in love. The one that was so kind and thoughtful.

That was where things ended. He wasn’t changing his life, not the life they wanted for her. It was selfish of him, but they had plans. So, they went their separate ways. Topper always kept an eye on the obituaries from her hometown. A couple years after being with Sarah he finally saw it. Y/N’s mom had died and left everything to her. He sent a card and donation, wondering if she ever got. He even paid all the funeral expenses. In some way he was trying to make up for the hurt he caused her. That next day he proposed to Sarah. When they were sending invitations to everyone, Sarah asked if his list was ready. They had the same friends so they only people extra he wanted to invite were some colleagues and old university buddies. He kept one invitation for himself though. Not telling Sarah why he wanted and extra one. He wanted to send one to Y/N, but he wanted to send more then just an invitation, he wrote her letter, wanting to get things off his chest before claiming his love to another women in front of a church. He knew it was wrong to send it, but he didn’t care. He figured you’d moved anyways after your mom died. You always said you hated your hometown. He sat down at his desk grabbing a pen and just started to write.

Dear Y/N,

I don’t know why I’m doing this. I can’t being to imagine what you must be thinking right now. I could take a swing at it though. Maybe your think what the hell is he writing me letter for. He broke my heart; he tore it into a million piece when I needed him the most. I don’t know why I did that to you. I think maybe because I got so scared you were going to leave and move on without me. I had pictured our life a certain way for so long that I didn’t want it to go any other way. I fucked up Y/N. I fucked you over when you left. I read about your mother online. I should have been there with you to get through everything. I should have been there with you, to hold you when you cried for her, to help make the big decisions. I donated to the charity you picked out. The school meal program, the was sweet. You can see that I’m getting married, to Sarah of all people. She’s a nurse now, working at the hospital with my mom. Things have gotten better with my mom. Things aren’t so bad between us. She loves planning this wedding, her and Sarah are like kids in candy store with the details. I finished law school; I’m working at firm here on the island. It’s nice to be home, I’ve enjoyed surfing on the east coast again. Sometimes I look around and I wonder if things would have been different if you stayed and we did this together. I wonder if you would have liked it here or maybe you wouldn’t because you hate storms, and we get a lot of hurricanes. I want to apologize Y/N. I want to say I’m sorry for hurting you the way I did. I’ll never forgot the look on your face that night. It keeps me awake at night. What I did to you Y/N, it was wrong, and I wouldn’t blame you for ripping this letter up and not giving me second thought. But if you don’t if you read this know that I’m inviting you to the wedding. I want you there, and not in some vengeful way, but as someone who I still want to have there. I understand if you don’t want to come but I hope you find it somewhere in your heart to change your mind.

Yours truly, Topper

It was sunny that day. Y/N had run to the post office on her break at work. She had finished her degree a year late, opting to take a year off when her mother first got sick. She got three good years with mom. They did everything on her bucket list. They went to Italy, then went rock climbing. Her mom took a cooking class, but most importantly she watched her daughter get married. When Y/N moved back home, she had no time for men. She wasn’t over Topper and wanted to put her full focus on her mom. After a while things got better and her heart started to hurt less. She wasn’t looking for a relationship, but when a new teacher started at her school her boss asked her to help him out. Evan was great. He was funny, kind and smart. He listened to everything she had to say. He heard from other teachers what was going with her mom and he became her support person. He proposed after only eight months of being together, but the two of them were so happy. It was different happy then Topper. He didn’t make her feel the same way, but she had to come to terms with the fact the no one was going to make her feel that way. It wasn’t fair to Evan to expect him to be someone he’s not. When he proposed it was the best day of her life. You guys did rush the wedding, but only because Y/N wanted her mom to be there. That was the last thing on her bucket list. To see her little girl, get married. Evan and Y/N didn’t take a honeymoon because a few weeks after the wedding her mom had finally passed. Y/N was devasted, she was hoping by some miraculous discovery they would cure her. It was a poor girl dream that didn’t come true. Y/N had planned the funeral with the help of Evan. When Evan went to pay for the funeral, the pastor told him it was already paid for by an angel donor. When he talked to her about, she assumed it was someone in the town that knew her mother.

When Y/N saw the letter, she recognized Topper’s handwriting. It was like a child’s, scribbled and almost unreadable. She could only read it from years of helping him study for tests. Her heart stopped for the second time in her life. Sitting in her car reading the words he wrote to her brought back a lot of painful memories she sooner forgets. She was so angry with him for bringing the past up but was happy to know that he had moved on from her. She never doubted that he would, after being so cruel to her, she began to wonder if all those years were just lies. Some sick joke to him. Though no matter what he did, Topper Thornton always held a special spot in her heart. She looked at the wedding invitation that went sent along with the letter and wondered if she should go. She could be spiteful and bring Evan with her making Topper fell some sort of pain. She didn’t think he could ever feel the same pain as she did. If it weren’t for Evan she would be alone right now.

Weeks turned into months and Y/N never told Evan about the letter she received. At first, she thought she wouldn’t go. Not giving Topper the validation that he still had some hold on her, but then she thought it might bring her closure to see him getting married. Maybe it would be like officially closing that chapter of her life. That’s what brought her to place she is now. Sitting in a plane on her way to North Carolina to watch the man she once so dearly loved to get married. She brought a simple dress not wanting to stand out, as she clearly wasn’t going to know anyone. She had only been this nervous a few times before. Waving the flight attendant over for a drink, liquid courage is what she needed. She wasn’t going to make a scene. Just sneak in the back, watch them say their vows, and sneak back out. She didn’t even book a hotel room opting to leave right after. She told Evan that she was meeting a friend out there from college which wasn’t a complete lie.

After the longest flight of her life, she caught the last fairy boat to Topper’s hometown. She drove through town in a rental car. It was small but cute. She found herself picturing the life she could’ve had. All the things Topper told her about his childhood. She even drove by the school reminiscing on the time she spent with Topper.

She still had a little while until the wedding. She thought she would be running late, but also didn’t want to show up to the church any sooner than she had too, if she was going to show up at all. She decided to head down to the beach. It was a thinking place for her. A place to be alone and collect her thought. She drove down the coast of Outer Banks seeing sign that congratulated Topper and Sarah on their big accomplishment. Y/N remembered Topper telling her about his life growing up, about how you either had everything made out for you or nothing at all. He was one of the lucky ones, his mother being a doctor at the hospital. His father was politician and was always gone on business.

 Y/N passed a bunch of yacht clubs and beaches on her way down the coast. She saw one spot by a hotel that must had been the reception area. “What a nice idea” Y/N thought. Topper loved the ocean, she always joked he was half fish. It was their favorite place to go. She kept driving until she got to a scolded area of the beach were no one was. She got out of the car and started walking towards the water. Her dress wasn’t so it was easy for her to walk in the water.

 Topper had stopped by the country club to make sure all the last-minute details were under control. Sarah had asked him to make sure there was enough champagne and bubbles for the send off to the honeymoon. He had assured her before that everything was ready to go, not to worry about, but did it anyways to appraise her mind. When he got to the venue, it was like it was someone else party. Like he was looking into this made-up scene in a box. He didn’t have his tux fully on yet, not wanting to wrinkle it. Instead, he was wearing a pair of khaki shorts and sweater.

 Topper had waited his whole life for this day. He had never seen his mother happier then when he asked for her help buying Sarah a ring. She could barely keep it a secret from Ward. At this point Topper didn’t know if he was doing this out of obligation or because he genuinely loved Sarah Cameron and wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. Of course, he was ready to settle down with someone, but was he just settling with Sarah? He decided to take a walk on the beach. One of the only places he could work out what he was feeling. He started heading towards the light house, knowing he could be gone long.

 He had walked not even half a mile when he saw her. He couldn’t tell at first, but it was her. He couldn’t miss that brown curly hair any where’s. He had to look twice to make sure it was har and not his mind playing tricks on him. Y/N was standing not even half a mile away from him. He couldn’t believe she got his letter and didn’t just throw it away. All of sudden Topper was nervous. He didn’t know what to do. Should he go over there and talk to her, should he ignore her and continue like she wasn’t there? He could turn around, she hadn’t seen him yet, he could walk away and never think about her again. But he couldn’t let her walk away, not again. He mustered up every bit a of courage he had and walked over to her.

 “Y/N?” He asked a small part of him hoped the women turning around wasn’t her. Just a miss understanding. She jumped a little. Turning around “Hey Topper, I-uh-I got your letter.” She spoke quietly.

 Y/N didn’t know what to do. He still looked so handsome, just like he did when she left. His eye blue eyes were paler. He looked tired, probably from planning a wedding. He was built differently though, not as fit as he once was but still strong. The two looked at each for what felt like ever. Topper couldn’t believe it, she looked more beautiful then when she left. She still had the kind doe eyes, and caring smile. A type of smile that would warm the saddest person’s heart.

 “I didn’t think you would actually come, I figured you were still mad at me.” He spoke up, not looking her in the eye. This was a conversation Topper always wanted to have with her, but never had the right words. “I had to get everything off my chest Y/N/N. I didn’t know if I could marry Sarah with all that in the past. I should have never done that too you. It was unfair and cruel.” He looked up meeting her eyes for the first time. Topper knew he still loved Y/N, he loved Y/N so much that it wasn’t fair to marry Sarah.

 “I figured that’s why you wrote the letter. You were never great with speaking how you felt. I didn’t know what to do when I got it. I was so angry at you Top. You left me when I needed you the most. I was so scared for my mom, but I knew if I had you by my side nothing would bad could happen, and then you left.” Y/N said to him. She promised herself she wasn’t going to cry, but there was no holding back the tears now. “Did you know my mom died? Did you know I held her in my arms while she took her last breath? Do you know how that felt?” She was screaming at him.

 Topper knew he deserved this, she deserved to get it all out. He could imagine the pain he caused her from leaving. “I did know she died. I donated in her name, and I paid for the funeral.” Topper spoke. “I didn’t want your money Top! I wanted you! I wanted you there, standing beside me! That whole time, all I wanted was you! I was married! Do you know how bad that is? That I wanted you, the man who broke me, not the husband who loves me.” Y/N was so frustrated, almost hyperventilating. Her words took Topper back, he didn’t know she was married. “I didn’t know you got married Y/N/N, that’s great I’m sure he’s great”- “Yeah he is. He’s a wonderful man, he’s a teacher like me, and he didn’t leave me. He stuck by my side through everything.” Y/N spoke quietly. She knew none of this was true. Sure, Evan was great, he was kind and caring, but he wasn’t Topper. Maybe Y/N settled too soon trying to appease mother. Giving her mom one last good memory. She looked back at Topper he was crying. He was crying for the wrong girl. He was crying for Y/N, for his past that he screwed up. Y/N looked out on to the water trying to settle her nerves some how, trying to hold herself back from speaking.

 “You know what the worst off all this Top is?” She spoke not looking away from the waves.

 “Do you want me to start this list?” He asked half heartily trying to make her laugh, which she did. He missed that laugh so much.

 “I still love you.” Topper looked at her. He almost had to ask her to repeat herself because he thought he miss heard her. “I still love you Topper, and I don’t know what I was thinking coming down here. I don’t want to start trouble or anything, but I need you to know all this before you marry Sarah. And I’m sure she’s great, but I love you.” Y/N spoke, finally turning to look at him. She knew it was wrong to tell Topper all of this. It wasn’t fair for her to confess her love for him hours before he was getting married to another women.

 Topper stood there in shock. He never thought he would hear those words come from her. Not after he broke her heart. He had an obligation to marry Sarah though. Plans had been made, people had showed up, she was probably getting ready with her friends right now. It made him sick to his stomach thinking about how much he still loved Y/N. Would it be fair to marry Sarah even though he loved another person? He was drawn from his thought again when Y/N spoke up, her voice shaky.

 “I’m not sure why I still love you, you broke me Topper, but everyday since then I’ve loved you. When I was getting married, I wanted to be you, it was always you for me. I know you’re the one for me, you’re still the one.” She was crying at this point and hurt Topper to see her like that, he always hated seeing you cry.

 Y/N looked at Topper, searching his facial expression for anything that would make him fight for them. She started to walk away, figuring that he didn’t love her back. How could he? He was getting married. “I still love you too Y/N/N.” She stopped dead in her tracks, whipping her head around to look at him.

 “What I did to you was inexcusable I should have fought for you.” Topper spoke walking towards her. He grabbed her small hands in his to stop them from shaking. “I forgot how beautiful you looked at night.” He whispered only for the two of them to hear. She looked down blushing. He could always make her heart flutter with his complements. He lifted her chin up to look him in the eye, wiping her tears.

 “I’m willing to fight for this if you are. I want you Y/N, not Sarah. I don’t know what we’ll do, we can leave, tonight. Go somewhere no one else knows us and start new. I don’t want to imagine my life without you.” Topper told her. He knew it would hurt Sarah, but she would move on. He also knew that a dead marriage would hurt both more.

 “What about Evan Top? I have a life back home, a job, I can’t turn around and leave it.” Y/N was more scared than anything. “I have some money put away, and you can get another job. I’ll get another job.” That was enough to sell Y/N. Maybe this was crazy, but it was going to be worth it for him. “Okay let’s go, tonight Topper. I don’t want to waste another second.”

 Topper was so happy, he leaned down and kissed Y/N with all passion he had. A kiss he should have been sharing with Sarah. He missed kissing Y/N, the way her lips were soft and plump, and always tasted like vanilla. She kissed him back, missing the feeling of his skin touching hers. They were making up for lost time. Nether rushing anything, just becoming familiar with one another again.

 After pulling away the drove back to Topper and Sarah’s apartment packing a few of his belongs putting them in her rental car. Next stop was his office to pick up his files for cases he was working on. As they drove towards the fairy, Topper kept looking over to her. “Are you sure you want to do this Topper, it’s not to late to turn around?” Y/N asked almost sacred of the answer. “I’m sure if you are love.” He said looking over to her before focusing on the road. She took his hand in hers, “I’ve never been so sure of something in my life.”

#topper thorton imagine #topper thorton x reader #topper thornton #topper obx #topper x reader #topper x you #topper x y/n #outer banks

[anon-luv]

Heartbeat ❥ONE❥ (Yoongi X Reader)

Pairing: Yoongi X Reader

Genre: Angst/Romance SliceofLIfeAu SingleDadAu

WordCount: 2.K+

POV: 2nd POV. The prologue will be in 3rd.

Trigger Warning: There will be mentions of Adult themes such as depression, death, and smut. This is not a pink and fluffy story. A fair warning to my readers… I cried while making the outline.

Summary: You had accepted you were going to die from a young age. Your weak heart had a timeline, but a second chance in life was given to you as you were given a heart transplant. Along with a new heart came a sense of guilt for the life that was lost as yours was given back.

A new a little family has now arrived in your putting in your path a single father and his young bright daughter. They come with a grief of their own, but for some reason, every moment you spend by their side rids you of your own. You are growing attached and addicted to their company, and you are not quite sure if that is a good or bad thing…

♬ Playlist ♬

♥ Story ♥

❥ Prologue ❥   ❥ ONE❥

Author’s Note: I know this is short, but I promise the next Chapters will be longer. I hope you all enjoy. Leave me feedback and love. Love you guys!

♬ My heart is weak Tear it down piece by piece Leave me to think Deep in my structure, I think I still love her, But I need some sleep You've taken my breath away, Now I want to breathe ♬

You were five years old when you found out you were going to die. Your heart had stopped. Three minutes, according to your parents, your soul had floated away into the heavens only to be brought back by God’s Miracle Workers, in human atheist terms the Medical Staff at your hometown’s hospital.

Your heart was weak. You would die young. It wasn’t pumping blood effectively. Drugs and a restrictive lifestyle were written in your future. Pitying looks were thrown your way constantly as you walked around wired up into a heart monitor as you walked along your school hallways. The winters were lonely, and summers were boring as you were forced to lock yourself within your jail of a house. The ache of being free to do what you ached for growing numb as the years went by. You had accepted your sentence as a refuge to the outside world. Your blue tinted fingernails and unamusing life were an accepted normal now. If you can’t beat it, join it, right?

People fluttered around you as if you were made out of the finest crystal, afraid to touch you but tempted to observe as if you were some intricate piece of artwork. You hated it. Up until today, the questions of how it had felt to die or what you had seen as you walked along the paths of the spirit world dropped around you like rain during a hurricane. It did not affect you though, quite contrary it had become a routine to make up the silliest of stories for your own amusement. Your dark humor that had been established and engraved into your personality, but sadly that was greatly unappreciated by your overly religious parents, and that was what had landed you in endless therapy sessions and group meetings about dealing with depression.

Your life was quite opposite of what your surrounding peers assumed it was, and only your closest friends understood your rants and sarcastic personality.

You were different. You knew it as you were growing up. The adventurous girl within you that longed to go out running and swimming on the creek was silenced by a long array of doctor appointments and experimental treatments. Until the day your mom received the call that would instate a change to your long twenty years of life. There was a match. You were on top of the list. It was finally your turn.

Your mom gleamed with happiness as the fear of change from your reclusive life taunted you.

You had already succumbed to the idea that you would die young, and therefore plans for a future had not been planned out. You had been living day by day without a worry of what tomorrow would bring, and now things were about to change.

You had done it for your family who had not yet let go of their faith. You had done it for them… not you.

It had been four years from when you had received your new heart. The scar brought back memories as your body still felt unbalanced from the lack of weight from the lack of wires and heart monitor you had carried around on the daily. The blue nail polish you wore on your nails was a live by routine, as you were unused to see the pinkish hue within them, you brought it with you everywhere on your mess of a backpack-purse hybrid. An unfinished letter thanking the family of the young girl whose life was stolen too soon laid on your desk where it had been for the past year or so. A young life in her early 20s you had found out. That girl had not welcomed death with arms wide open as you would have had. She had been unprepared for death and ready for her future with most of it probably planned out. She must have had a lot of friends and family waiting for her at home, that had to plan a funeral last minute, unlike your family who knew even what playlist you would like to be played as your body was given back to the earth.

Guilt. All you felt was guilt as you laid on your dead silent bedroom and you could feel your heartbeat beating it your ears. A heartbeat that didn’t belong to you.

“(Y/N), fancy meeting you here again” Denise the team counselor for the grief support group welcomed you.

 “What are you talking about?? I have been coming every Sunday for about 8 years now. Don’t sound surprised…” you replied as you took your usual seat at the farthest section of the circle.

“Your parents would appreciate you going to church with them on Sunday mornings, more than your perfect attendance on these grieving support groups” Denise said throwing a sympathetic smile your way, “(Y/N), what happened to that girl was unfortunate, but she gave you the gift of life and you should cherish that and go forward and enjoy the life that you have been blessed with”

You shook your head and looked down on the floor as your voice dropped to a barely inaudible level, “How am I supposed to grieve a person appropriately when I wasn’t given the opportunity to meet them??”

Denise threw a concern look your way, but before she could answer, a pair walked in looking a bit lost. An unfamiliar man with a young little girl walked in smiling shyly. Denise stood up right away and walked their way with a bright smile on her face, “Welcome” she said in an overly cheerful voice.

“Hi, my name is Yoongi and this is Skyeleen ...Skye for short and we are looking for the grief support group. Little Skye has a few questions, and my mom suggested this group. We are new to town and lately, she has been having questions…” the young man said still a bit shy as he took a peek to his surroundings. He smiled your way and you quickly smiled back and waved at the cute little rosy cheeks girl on his arms. She waved happily your way.

“Go ahead and take a seat, we will begin shortly”, Denise replied as she pointed at the chairs around the room.

Yoongi nodded as he took a seat on the nearest plastic cold chairs, about 3 or 4 chairs away from you. The little girl took a seat and swung her feet playfully as her father now tried to fix her unmatching ponytails. You smiled at the cute moment and wondered how it would be when you had kids, and idea you quickly shut down as the guilt once again started spreading again through your insides.

In a few minutes the room was full with lost looking souls, some smiling and some still with fresh tears running down their eyes.

Each meeting started with a short introduction and an update of everyone’s life. The group’s main goal was to help people move on and throughout the years faces came and went and only 2 people remained loyal. You and Denise. Denise had lost her husband and after that fell on a deep black hole of depression, after overcoming that dark time in her life she decided to form a grief support group to help those in need, and here you were now, with a weird sort of addiction to it. It might not be apparent to many, but you could still see the sadness that would fill her eyes whenever she talked about him. Especially during the holiday seasons.

 A little voice caught your attention, “Hi my name is Skye, and I am 4. I starts the Pre-k school soon and I want to be a ninja when I grow up.” She smiled towards the man you had learned name was Yoongi. He nodded at her encouraging for her to go on, “My daddy tooks me here because I asked questions and sometimes I can tell I makes him sad. I don’t want to make daddy cry, so I said okay. You see… my mommy is an angel, daddy said she got wings when I was born and flew away into the sky, so so so so I never got to see her. I don’t feel sad like daddy does because I never see her, but I want to see her. Daddy says I will one day, but I won’t in a long time. When I meet her I want to watch movies together, but for now daddy will watch them with me. Daddy said he will see her later too, and I hope we can be a family like the ones in the shows. I want to know where my mama is and if it hurts her to grow her wings out...and what color they are. Daddy doesn’t know… but he does know her favorite color was pink… I hope they are pink”

A wet sensation traveled down my cheek as I heard the little girl speak and as I looked around I saw I wasn’t the only one. She hugged her dad tightly and he whispered something in her ear to make her smile as he himself returned the gesture with the most beautiful gummy smile I had ever seen.

It was once again your turn to face the crowd before you, “Hello, my name is (y/n). I know I am not much of a stranger to the most of you. I have been coming here for a few years. I did not lose anyone close to me, so I do not know your pain, but someone had their life taken so I can live a longer life myself. A few years ago I had a heart transplant, and until this day I have had a hard time accepting the fact that I am getting to live because someone else did not. Anyway, enough of the introduction …. I wrote a little more on the letter I have yet to mail. I want to make sure I am not invading their privacy and memory so I also erased some of it. I keep on telling myself I tomorrow I will stamp and send it away, but I have not been able to. I need strength and closure. I want this guilt to go away…”

You looked around the room of strangers to see them nodding, the little girl looked at you, a little smile on her face, “I think the angel that gave you life is happy you are alive”

You smiled back at her unsure of what to say as the rest of the group awwed at her genuine adorable response.

 The meeting finished as quickly as it started, and once again it was time for you to gather your stuff and walk away from where you felt the most comfortable in. The unjudging eyes in the room had been more of a family than your actual family had been lately. The strangers in the room knew more of your secrets and desires than your closest friends did. They knew about the guilt you carried with you everywhere. You had started attending these meetings to try and learn about how the people around you would grieve once you were gone, but after the heart transplant you had surprisingly come back, but this time to learn how to grieve yourself.

You walked outside slowly, the biting cold sensations of the early winter wind had you trembling despite the thick sweater and beanie you had on. You felt a small tug in your hand and you quickly turned to face a small little girl. Skye.

 “Hey, I like your nails. I like blue. How do I make mine blue too??” She asked taking a hold of your hand. An out of breath Yoongi came running towards his daughter. Up close you could notice how handsome he truly was. His dark brown hair fell against his honey like orbs. His cheeks were rosy from the chilly air along with his button nose and lips. His eyebrows furrowed with worry as he inspected his daughter from head to toe, which was quickly replaced by a shy smile your way.

 “Skyleen, what have I told you about running??? One of these days you are going to fall and get such a big owwy.” He scolded the little girl and then turned to face you extremely apologetic, “I am sorry about that”

 “Don’t worry about it” you replied and then turned to face the little girl, “Thank you. I can do your nails blue if you want”

She nodded excitedly, “Yes please ma’am”

“Call me (Y/N)” you replied kneeling down to her level.

“(Y/N)” she replied giving you the widest of smiles.

“Skye we promised grandma we would be back for brunch.” Yoongi reminded her with a small smile.

“That’s true. I am sorry (Y/N) I have to go to Nana’s but can we do it maybe yesterday” she asked excitedly.

“Sounds like a plan” you replied as you saw the little girl jump excitedly in place.

“Thank you and I am so sorry about this” Yoongi replied as he threw one of those melting gummy smiles your way.

“No problem” you replied as they turned away and started walking to what you were assuming was their car.

You waved at the little girl as she turned your way one more time with a bright smile on her face waving both her hands enthusiastically. For the first time in a while, the guilt dissipated almost into nothingness, but as they walked out of view and you looked up at the sky as it gifted the world with the first winter snowfall the stabbing remorse came back tenfold.

#kpopwonderlandtag #hyunglinenetwork #networkbangtan #kreativewritersnet #yoongi scenario #min yoongi fanfiction #yoongi angst #yoongi fanfic #yoongi x reader #bts #bts x reader #bts angst #bts romance #suga #suga fanfic #suga angst #suga romance #bts fanfic #bts scenario #yoongi #min yoongi scenario #bts min yoongi #kpop #kpop fanfic #kpop scenario