criminal minds season 5 episode 9 - 100

Hi! Looking at this list, I keep coming back to this one: two characters haven't seen each other for a while, one keeps rambling about something insignificant and the other one kisses them because ''shut up you're rambling just kiss me''

ooh i love this, it came out so soft, and im such an idiot for stuttering bumbling aaron.

**

Six months. Six fucking months she had been gone, London, cold and raining and covered in fog. It had taken six months for him to figure out the excuse, work out the liaising with London PD, have Dave beg off the trip at the last minute.

He was nervous on the plane, his leg restless as he tried and failed to stretch, the paperwork on the empty seat beside him ignored. He wasn’t sure why he was doing it, and if he had been flying the plane he was sure he would have turned it around by now.

It was the morning after JJ’s wedding, the date she had promised was coffee and pastry, sitting and talking about Clyde and why she felt she had to leave.

“I’ve done all I can here, it feels like anyway.” She said. She seemed energised, buoyed by the new opportunity, and a spark in her eyes was all the answer he needed.

He so rarely saw her in casual clothing, a loose sweater and jeans, her hair still curling from the night before, both of them lamenting Dave’s tendency to over order champagne.

“We’re going to miss you terribly” He said, forcing his hands to stay at his sides, the desire to reach for her a madness he kept control of, barely.

“You say that like I’m going to disappear completely. Do you think Penelope would allow that?” She replied with a laugh, easy and light in a way that made his heart lift.

He should have told her he was coming. That was the thought that distracted him through customs, the taxi to her office as rain beat relentlessly on every surface. But he didn’t know what to say, how do you tell someone you missed them when you never had them in the first place.

She had been standing in the front of the café, shuffling her feet lightly as a breeze caught her hair, whipped it around her face.

“So you think you did everything you wanted here?” he asked, the question itching his brain.

“Just one thing I didn’t” She replied quietly.

“What?” he asked, knowing whatever she wanted he would give to her.

“This” She answered, and before he could move, she had kissed him. Her hand on his cheek, small and soft and warm as she pressed her lips to his. It was hesitant and curious, and he froze, still as if a dream had suddenly come to life, the world in technicolour, high definition for the first time.

She hadn’t mentioned it before she left for good, and the words died like roses on a vine whenever he tried to ask.

His FBI badge got him in the door at Interpol. He was surprised when it got him to her floor as well, a kindly intern pointing to the glass walled office at the top of the stairs.

He could see her already, pacing as she talked on the phone, and his breath caught in his throat. She was the same, beautiful and ethereal and wonderful and in his line of sight. His body told him to run, but he climbed the stairs anyway, ignoring his palms sweating on the bannister.

He knocked and she told him to enter without looking, turning only when silence greeted the sound of a closed door.

“I’m going to have to call you back” She said, hanging the phone up as a smile broke over her face.

“Hi” She said, watching as he shuffled his feet.

“Uh. Hi, Emily, Sorry, I didn’t call, but there’s a conference here, on profiling, its sexual sadists, and they wanted some input from the BAU, and Dave was going to come but he thinks he’s coming down with a cold, or typhoid or something, so he decided not to come, so I’m here, and I didn’t call and I’m sorry but I wanted to see you, and you look great and this office is…”

She had walked towards him, and again he was reminded of a dream, as though her presence sharpened colours, their saturation vivid as the rain streaked her window.

“Aaron you’re rambling” She said, reaching the same small soft and warm hand to cup his cheek. “Shut up and kiss me”

The world was sharp and hard but she was soft and gentle, and he wrapped his arms around her like he’d been wanting to his entire life.

Rossi: Where is everyone?

Emily: At the hospital. Luke swallowed a watermelon seed.

Rossi: Why? It’s not like a watermelon will grow inside him or something.

Emily: Oh. I’ll go get them.

Fluent (Emily Prentiss x Reader)

@stunudo requested language kink! Semi-public bathroom sex. 305 words, rated R. 

(Author needs to practice her French. Native speakers, please forgive me.) 

“What’s got you all riled up?” Emily asks, half laughing as you kiss her the second the bathroom door locks behind you. 

“You,” you whisper. “Your voice, when—” 

“You like hearing me speak French,” she realizes, and she pushes you back against the sink and kisses you, smiling. 

“Maybe. A little bit.” 

Emily grins, cocky and gorgeous, and slips a hand up your skirt and into your panties, running two gentle fingertips up your center. You’ve been watching her interview a French witness all evening, and —

“That doesn’t feel like a little bit,” she teases. 

You roll your eyes and pout, “You’re sexy as hell when you start speaking other languages. So sue me.” 

“Interessante,” she murmurs, sultry and smooth, ducking to kiss the side of your neck as she curls two fingers into you. “T’es toute mouillée pour moi.” 

You shudder and lean back, sagging against the sink, tilting your head to bare your throat for her. She crooks her fingers and rubs your g-spot with a practiced ease, and you buck helplessly against the heel of her hand. 

“Like that,” you gasp, as if you need to tell her. 

“Comme ça?” she purrs.  

“You’re gonna kill me one of these days,” you mumble, sliding your arms around her neck, trying to stay steady. 

“Ma gentille fille. Tu me rends fou.” 

For all you care, she could be reciting a grocery list at this point. It’s French and it sounds obscene, and her voice is doing it for you almost as much as her fingers are. 

Touch is a language of its own, with her. 

“Exactement comme ça, chérie," she says. 

If she keeps that up she’s going to make you come so hard you can barely form words in your own damn language. 

.

.

.

Hey, people who make tma playlists!

May I kindly make you aware of this song.

It's pretty much a perfect buried/corruption song.

Also, it just kinda fits Jane Prentiss.

one of my favorite things about criminal minds are the scenes where reid explains something and emily just looks SO lost

Something Wicked - Part One

Spencer Reid x Original Female Character 

Chapter One: Pretty Boy

warnings: angst, enemies to lovers (because that sometimes needs a warning lol) 

Summary: Natalie Hart is a talented journalist and David Rossi’s good friend with a keen interest of criminal psychology. The FBI hires her to fill in the gap of press liaison when JJ vacates the position. At first, Spencer resents her replacing his friend, but you know what they say: there’s a thin line between love and hate...

“They’re gonna say this is nepotism.” I huff, fixing my hair in the reflection of the silver elevator walls. 

“Stop being silly. They’re going to love you.” David pats me on the back. The doors open with a ding and only David’s hand on my back keeps my from staying in my spot. He steers me through some double doors and into a large room. The bullpen, I gather. 

“Nepotism...” I sing under my breath. 

David Rossi, author extraordinaire and member of the famous behavioural analysis unit, just laughs at me. “They’re not going to say it’s nepotism because it’s not nepotism. You got this job because you earned it: because you’re good at what you do and they need someone like you on the team. Understood?” He grabs my shoulders in his hands and looks me deep in the eyes. 

I roll mine in response. “And the email you sent to the upper echelon of the FBI requesting that my application be ‘payed special attention’ has nothing to do with it?” 

He chuckles and steers me further into the room with a firm hand between my shoulder blades. “Even if it did, which I’m not saying it did,” He puts a hand up to stop me interrupting him, “it wouldn’t change the fact that you are the best person for this job. And the BAU respects people who are great at their jobs. So yes, angel, they will love you. End of discussion.” 

I’m still not feel very confident, but his faith in me and his team eases my anxiety. That is, until, he opens the door to a large office and I am immediately greeted by the stares of five FBI agents. 

“Thanks, David.” The one who seems to be leader nods at Rossi from the front of the room. Rossi squeezes my shoulder assuringly and takes a seat next to a woman with crazy blonde hair in pigtails. Not exactly what I pictured an FBI agent to look like. 

“Everyone, this is Natalie Hart. She will be taking over the position of public liaison in the absence of JJ. Natalie, this is Penelope Garcia, technical analyst.” He gestures to the blonde woman next to Rossi. “Emily Prentiss, Derek Morgan, Spencer Reid, you know David and I’m Aaron Hotchner.” He makes his way around the table and most of them nod or smile at me as they’re introduced. All except for the one called Spencer. He just stares. “Welcome to the BAU.” No extra dilly-dallying, just a sweeping gaze over the team and he is done with my introduction. 

“She looks a little young don’t you think, Hotch?” The man at the back - Derek, I think - speaks up. He has dark skin and a shiny bald head but a strong goatee. Not sure how I feel about the facial hair, but other than that he’s pretty handsome. 

“I-” I go to stand up for myself but am interrupted by a quiet voice from left. 

“Age is a not a precursor to success, or to any measure of talents in a specific field.” I whip my head around and meet eyes with the one called Spencer, still older than me but certainly the youngest of the team. He has long, brown hair that curls above his shoulders and intense eyes that are studying me. 

I nod gratefully at him. 

“But Morgan is right. She does look very young, and being the face of the BAU is a position that needs to be taken seriously. It could be a problem.” He shrugs, putting the end of a pen in his mouth. 

“What, just because she’s a young woman means she can’t be taken seriously?” The lady with dark hair laughs sarcastically. “JJ was.” 

“She’s not JJ.” Spencer spits and rises from his seat, avoiding eyes with everyone. 

“Um, hi. I’m right here. Let’s make one thing clear.” I cross my arms over my chest and scan the room. Derek raises an eyebrow at me and Aaron just stares at me. Rossi and the two women -Emily and Penelope- however, are sending me warm smiles. 

“I’m good at my job. I wouldn’t be here if I was anything less than great at what I do. I graduated top of my class at Brown and I’ve been doing this job for six years now. What I look like is of no importance.” Derek bows his head, obviously regretting saying what he did. “Now, I know I’m new and you’re all very close. I’m not trying to get in the way of that. All I’m asking is that you don’t condescend to me or talk about me like I’m not here. It’s disrespectful and I don’t appreciate being disrespected. Is that alright?” 

Silence stretches out. Rossi’s smile widens and he looks proudly at me. 

Aaron nods, a small smile on his lips.“You heard her. Play nice.” 

Immediately, Spencer unfreezes from his sport and stalks out of the room, not bothering to say goodbye. Aaron sighs and follows him out.

Penelope jumps out of her chair and runs over to me, grabbing my shoulders in excitement. “Welcome to the team! I’m Penelope, but everyone calls me Garcia. Except for Derek, he calls me the dirtiest things.” She smirks at Derek and winks obscenely at him. He just laughs and shakes his head.

“Emily. Nice to finally meet you. Nothing like a friendly interrogation on your first day.” Emily shakes my hand firmly and gives me a big smile. 

“I’m used to it, it comes with the territory.” I smile back. “Nice to meet you both.”

Derek steps past the ladies and holds his hand out. “I am sorry about before. I didn’t mean it like that.”

I raise an eyebrow at him. “What did you mean it like?” 

“I’ve just always found that families or the police react warmer to a more mature looking person. They don’t like young people telling them what to do, or what they did wrong. It’s nothing personal, I swear.” His hand remains out. 

I nod, taking in his words, before grasping his hand. “No, I get that. But trust me, I’ll make them listen.” We share a smile. 

“I have no doubt about that after hearing you rip into us. It was deserved though, no doubt.” He lets go of my hand and Rossi comes up next to me, joining the growing circle.

“Don’t mind Spencer. He doesn’t like change.” He laughs. “He’ll come around.”

“I’m guessing he was close with Jennifer?” 

“The closest. Her leaving hit him hard. He’s just taking it out on you.” Emily says.

“I don’t think I need to be a profiler to figure that out.” I laugh and she and Garcia join in. 

“He’s normally really nice. I promise. Just give him a day or two.” Rossi pats me on the back. “Now, who’s in for dinner at mine?”

A day or two later

Spencer doesn’t glare at me anymore, which is nice. He just doesn’t look at me at all. I can’t tell which I liked less. At least with the glaring he was acknowledging my presence. 

The rest of the team has been completely welcoming. I even went out for drinks for Emily and Garcia on Friday. So. Much. Fun. Who would’ve thought that FBI agents would go so hard? Garcia I expected. Emily, not so much. 

The amount of cases that pass my desk every day is gut-wrenching, but nothing more so than me having to decide which ones to ignore and which to follow up on. I’ve come to Hotch three times now with a case that I’m certain needs our help, just for him to shake his head solemnly at me. 

Six women, all murdered in the span of six months from Seattle. I feel confident that we need to go ASAP. Hotch reads over the file and sets it down in front him.

“Seattle has a massive population with an even bigger crime rate. There’s nothing connecting these women apart from gender. Different races, ages, demographics... they’re not killed in the same way. We can’t be sure its serial.” 

“But-” 

“Natalie, if we chase this case down a rabbit hole, not certain that we can be of any use, what happens when we’re actually needed and we’re nowhere to be found?” I just nod and ignore the gnawing pit in my gut. He sees my hesitation. 

“It doesn’t get any easier.” He says as I reach the door. I pause, staring at my feet. “But saving the ones we can makes it worth it.” 

“How can we save people if none of these cases are appropriate?” I bite back. 

“It will come, Natalie. But we can’t go rushing into things. More people will get hurt, trust me.”

The next day, it turns out Hotch is right. A file from Memphis PD catches my eye and I all but spring to Hotch’s office after reading it thoroughly.

“Family annihilator. Memphis, Tennessee. Three families in two months, the latest family only two weeks after the second, and that was two days ago.” 

He pauses what he’s doing and stares me down. “How do we know they’re connected?”

I’m already prepared for the question. “In all three murders, the father is tied to a kitchen chair asphyxiated with a plastic bag. The rest of the family are beaten to death, tied at the hands and feet.” Hotch nods, agreeing with my analysis for once. “And he leaves a message.” I add.

“What message?” 

I take a deep breath and look back down at my notes. It’s the one thing I didn’t care to memorise. “By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes.”

Hotch stands and follows me out the door. “Round up the team. We’re going to Memphis.” 

***

I end up being stuck next to Spencer on the plane as he’s the last one to find a seat and the one next to the window on my left is the only option. He does not look happen about it. In fact, he sits with his legs crossed and angled away from me, basically putting his back to me. I roll my eyes at him. 

Hotch gathers out attention and Garcia’s face pops up on a screen. 

“Hello my furry friends, welcome to episode 200 of some whack job’s attempt at population control. Today on the show, we have...” The faces of the most recent victims pop up. She runs us through the families, their names, their professions and the tiny connection each of them have: a church choir that sang at two of the families schools’ and the most recent father’s christmas party. 

“It’s Shakespeare.” Spencer blurts, breaking out of his stony silence. Everyone seems startled, as if they had forgotten he was sitting there. “The message on the walls written in blood. It’s Shakespeare.”

“Macbeth, to be precise.” I add, backing him up. I smile at him, hoping he’ll appreciate that. He doesn’t. 

“If you’d had let me finish, I would have said that.” He spits. My mouth gapes. The rest of the plane is stunned too. 

“Spencer, is everything okay?” Emily asks softly. My face is burning and I feel heat rising in my chest but I push it down, taking deep breaths instead. 

Don’t let him see he gets to you.

“No, but let’s just keep pretending it is like we always do, right, Emily?” He stands abruptly and stalks to the back of the plane, muttering about coffee. Emily closes her mouth with a snap and shares a look with the rest of us. 

“Well that was uncalled for.” We all nod in agreement, and I can still feel angry tear pricking at my eyes. Ugh. Why did I have to be one of those people that cried when they’re angry? 

Emily places a soft hand on my shoulder. “You okay, Natalie? You didn’t deserve that.” 

I take a deep breath and tuck my dark behind my ears. “I know. I’ll be back, just going to the bathroom.” 

I need to get out from under those stares before I start actually crying. The attention will only fluster me more, and then it would just become an absolute trainwreck. 

I see the back of Spencer’s sweater as I near the back of the plane. He’s facing the wall, tinkering with the coffee pot. He turns to see who’s coming and pauses when he sees it’s me. I give him my best glare and shut the toilet door firmer than necessary. 

After splashing my face with cold water and fixing my shoulder-length brown hair, I smooth down my button up and stare at myself in the mirror. 

“He’s just a boy.” I tell myself, fixing my collar. “And we don’t let boys make us cry. So buck up.” Plastering an award-winning smile on my face, I open the door to find he’s not there. 

As I make my way back to my seat, I spy him sitting in the last row with Morgan, their heads bent down as they whisper. How I’d kill to know what they’re talking about. I take a spare seat next to Emily and she gives my leg a reassuring squeeze. 

“When we land, I want all hands on deck. The killer is speeding up, and if he keeps at it, he’ll hit again in the next couple of days.” Hotch addresses the plane. I have to lean my head around my seat to see him. I catch Spencer staring at me and swiftly ignore him, focusing on Hotch. 

“Rossi, I want you and Emily to go to the M.E and see what they have to say. Morgan, you and I will go to the latest home, learn what we can about this killer and his M.O.” I freeze, knowing who that leaves. “Spencer and Natalie, you two are to go to the Memphis police department and set up shop. Natalie, get a good rapport going with Chief Willoughby. He can be a difficult one, but I have faith in you.” He sends me a pointed look and I nod, my chest filling with pride. 

Finally, I get to do my job. 

Spencer doesn’t dare openly complain about being paired with me, but the second we land he hurries on over to Hotch. I stall within earshot, pretending to struggle with my bag. 

“I can’t have two members of my team unwilling to cooperate.” I catch Hotch saying. Spencer groans in protest. 

“I will cooperate! I just don’t see why you’re pairing me with her immediately. You know how I feel about her being here.” 

Ouch.

“How you feel is exactly why I’m doing this, Reid. I won’t have you moping around just because JJ left. You think she’d want you treating Natalie like this? She’d be disgusted.” The anger in Hotch’s voice is unmistakable, and it sends Spencer into silence. 

“Now, you will pull it together and start treating Natalie like a member of the team. Because she is. And I don’t care how much you’re angry at her for taking JJ’s job. That anger is misplaced. And you know it.” Hotch stalks off the plane, leaving just Spencer and I. I immediately busy myself, stuffing my jacket in my bag and slinging it over my shoulder, going to walk past him.

A hand reaches out and grabs my arm, stopping me.

“Natalie, can we talk?” Spencer looks at me, his eyes filled with some sort of emotion. But I’m not a profiler, so hell if I know what is is. Probably just more resentment. 

“Why? So you can tell me more about how I’m some unwelcome replacement?” He opens his mouth the speak but I interrupt him. “Or better yet, why don’t we just glare silently at each other? You seem to like doing that.” He’s a good head taller than me so I have to tilt my head up to look at him.  

He doesn’t respond. Not that I was expecting him to. 

“I’ll meet you in the car, Spencer. I’d hate to keep the others waiting. I’m nice like that.” With a sarcastic smile, I leave him standing awkwardly in the aisle of the jet.

For someone with such an angelic face, he sure does make himself pretty hateable. 

Ah yes. Me, my wife, and her wife.

i don’t make the rules but spencer reid gives off enby vibes 😭✋🏻💛

Gideon

Hotch

Reid

Morgan

Rossi

Prentiss

Garcia

Another pic I'm clearing out. I ADORE Abigail too. So Abigail and Paget together? 😍

i’m so sorry but i cannot take emily seriously while she was demoting luke

BAU found family headcanons: Holiday Edition

Every Easter, Spencer lectures the team about the pagan origins of the holiday until Derek finds some way to distract him (one year everything he tries doesn’t work so he gives up and picks Spencer up fireman style and carries him off while Spencer continues talking about the spring equinox). This distraction plan usually takes at least 15 minutes and leaves Hotch with a headache for the rest of the day

The first year Emily was at the BAU for Christmas, she was a mess. She’d never really celebrated holidays growing up but the team has a huge holiday party each year which meant Emily spent a month and a half panicking and trying to find the perfect gifts for each member of the team—after excessive research on what actually is an appropriate gift for Christmas, of course. (Gideon simply grunts when he receives his gift and JJ has to spend exactly 17 minutes convincing Emily that that’s just how he is and that she did perfectly fine with all of the presents)

It was mutually decided several years ago that the 4th of July absolutely sucked. A majority of the team hates fireworks for one reason or another (they’re too loud for Spencer’s taste and a good half of the team is reminded of the sound of gunshots every time they hear fireworks go off). Once Rossi joins the team, he invites them all over to his cabin (read: mansion) about an hour from the city so that they can all escape the noise for the night of the 4th. This usually ends with all of them drunk off their asses and Garcia and Spencer playing with sparklers until they accidentally catch something on fire (Spencer once singed a piece of JJ’s hair off)

The girls usually have a Galentine's Day together for Valentine’s (a tradition Garcia started when she first joined the team and needed to make friends—JJ was all for it and Elle reluctantly joined). The BAU Bros eventually decide they feel left out and have their own Valentine’s Day celebration together which mostly involves drinking and playing golf—or, in Spencer’s case, hitting the grass with a golf club until his ball rolls five feet away.

Thanksgiving, in true BAU fashion, is absolute chaos. There are always at least 20 different kinds of food being served because each team member has their own traditions and food preferences. There’s a copious amount of alcohol and an oddly large number of pasta dishes (they only try turkey once but that leads to them almost burning Rossi’s house down and the fire department needing to be called so never again)

Reid obviously always makes a big deal about Halloween and as his friends’ kids grow older, he volunteers to take the trick or treating because he claims JJ and Hotch won’t be able to “give them the full Halloween experience” or whatever because apparently they’re no fun and have better things to be doing than knocking on every door in a 20-mile radius (Emily goes one year to help Spencer and spend time with the kids—she wears a matching vampire costume with Henry because he begged her for a month leading up to it—and after she vows to never go again, her feet are sore for a week after)

Unsub: “Age is just a number.”

Emily:

Emily: “Well in that case federal prison is just a place.”

Just posted chapter 4 💫

Hotch: we’ve profiled the unsub as a woman in her late twenties who is killing men who have cheated on their significant others.

Prentiss: good for her, bitches ain’t shit

Hotch:

Prentiss: except you JJ *aggressive wink*

y’all i’m sorry for this one afsjdjdksjjsgd

Another POV! Show her some love!

The moment when Emily, JJ and Garcia cuddle up together on the dance floor at the Willifer wedding is just something so personal to me