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Orgasms full of Peace

There is no questions pertaining to the release

I’m supposed to be here

I could complain about my past mistakes but they just helped me see clear

Some of them were exactly what I wanted if I’m to be fair

Some couldn’t believe in what they couldn’t see and for them I just might be air

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We tend to think that we are who we are and there is not much we can do about that. But the fact is, we choose our personality and who we are. Our personality is shaped by the choices we make over time. One of the most frequent questions in personal development probably is “Can I change my personality type?” According to most personality type theories, the person’s type is inborn and does not change. However, people can develop traits and habits that differ or even directly contradict the description of their type.

An example may help us understand better. Suppose lights in the room suddenly go off and we are in complete darkness. We may be able to navigate our way to the door, but which of our senses will come into play? Touch? Hearing? Smell? It would be anything but vision, our preferred sense. As soon as the lights come back on, we will switch back to using vision again as it makes it much easier to navigate around the room.

The way our personality works is quite identical. The environment we are in shapes our personality in a certain way, forcing us to develop traits and habits that might be foreign to our type. For instance, if we are naturally casual and spontaneous, but our work schedule is very structured and our manager is obsessive about schedules, our preferences are likely to change. However, we will probably switch back as soon as we leave that job. The same rule applies to other traits as well.

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Here it is important to consider that sociability is often confused with extraversion, just like shyness is confused with introversion – this is a common oversight when it comes to deliberating personality types. While extraverted people naturally find it easier to talk to other people (they gain energy when they do this), there are many shy or solitary people among them. Conversely, introverted types lose energy when they communicate with others, but you would be able to find many eloquent individuals in that group.

Does personality stay the same from birth for the rest of your life, or can it be changed? For decades personality was considered as unmalleable as concrete – who we were at age 15 is who we would be at age 75. But within the last 20 or so years, as cognitive and behavioral sciences have evolved, we have come to see personality as at least marginally changeable, and possibly much more so. While certain personality elements remain stable over time, others change in distinct ways.  In other words, personality is both relatively stable and changeable, and the degree of change is specific to each person. As to what influences personality stability or malleability, both genetics and environmental factors play lead roles.

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The relatively new wrinkle in this understanding is epigenetic influence, in which genes for certain factors may be “switched on” by environmental influences. What this means is that when it comes to personality change, we should not compare ourselves to others.  Our especially likable and gregarious friend in middle school is still probably going to be more likable and gregarious than most people we know in mid-life. What matters is how much we have changedand that is very much a person-specific evaluation.

Personality tests can be part of the problem. They are like a frame in a movie—just a part of the story of our life. They tell us where we are and, in that way, they are very valuable. Personality tests are self-reported. Our view of ourselves is constantly changing based on our current focus, context, and emotions. 

Another aspect to consider is that anyone who has ever done something great with their life has had to transform themselves from who they are to who they became. They had to act accordingly beyond their current personality and circumstances to eventually do what they did and become who they became.

In this aspect, some fallacies (untruths) that limit our growth and potential are:

Fallacy #1: Personality Can Be Categorized into “Types”.

This states that the way we react to life is just “who we are,” and we should accept it, and not try to change it, and we could not if we tried. Even if those traits are limitations, there is nothing we can do about it.

There are no personality types that lock us into a way of being. These labels we take on tend to excuse us from taking personal responsibility for the behavioral outcomes we experience. We can shape our personalities to serve our goals. Our personality should come from our goals. Our goals should not come from our personality.

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Fallacy #2: Personality Is Innate and Fixed

Our personalities change over time. Who do we want to be in the future is more important than who you are now, and should actually inform who we are now. Our intended future self can direct our current identity and personality far more than our former self can. We can use our future self as the filter for developing our personality in the present. Our future self can be evolved and different from our current self. Successful people start with a vision of their future self and use it as the filter for everything they do.

Fallacy #3: Personality Comes from Our Past

The idea that we are defined by our past or that the past is the best predictor of our future is true, but not because we cannot change. We simply have not for another reason.

Four reasons that keep people stuck in their past may be:

a)      They continue to be defined by past traumas that have not been reframed.

b)      They have an identity narrative based on the past, not the future.

c)      Their subconscious keeps them consistent with their former self and emotions.

d)      They have an environment supporting their current rather than their future identity.

Past events can inform and change our present and future because we are learning from them. If not, we short-change our future. How we describe, interpret, and identify with our past has far more to do with where we are, here and now, than it has to do with our actual past.

Quote- “Anyone who isn’t embarrassed by who they were twelve months ago isn’t learning enough.”(Source: Alain de Botton)

Fallacy #4: Personality Must Be Discovered

Our personality, like our passion, is created by us and not discovered. It is designed. It is a by-product of the decisions we make. What we fail to understand sometimes is that inspiration follows action, not the other way around. Unless and until we take action, our confidence and imagination will remain low. We need to decide what we want and begin moving forward. With progress—even minuscule progress—our clarity and confidence will increase, opening the door for greater flexibility and change.

Fallacy #5: Personality Is Our True and “Authentic” Self

Our “authentic self” is a moving target, especially if we are of the kind to explore possibilities and are growing. To define ourselves with a fixed, authentic self is self-limiting and rigid. It lacks imagination and a growth mindset. Our authentic self is what we most believe in and who we aspire to be. Moreover, our authentic self is going to change. Being authentic is about being honest, and being honest is about facing the truth, not justifying our limitations.

The Gap and the Gain

When we are in the gap, we cannot enjoy or comprehend the benefits in our life. All we are focused on is why something was not how we thought it should have been. For instance, we might live in a great house. But if we are in the gap, then all we might see is what is wrong with our house. We may have an amazing partner but only see what we believe to be wrong or missing in them.

As we get older, we tend not to put ourselves into new contexts, so our personality becomes predictable. We get into our comfort zones. We see consistency in everyday life because of the power of the situation. Putting ourselves in new environments, around new people, and taking on new roles is one of the quickest ways to change our personality, for better or worse.

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To conclude, our basic personality type cannot change – however, we can change the aspects of your personality that we are unhappy with. By doing this we will strengthen our shadow traits and become a more well-rounded individual, even though our dominant traits will still remain the same. Such a change could be triggered by either the environment we are in or our own will – to each his own.

**Source Credits:

Parts adapted from The Book:- Personality Isn’t Permanent By Benjamin Hardy

Content Curated By: Dr Shoury Kuttappa.

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Dreaming is time traveling

Perhaps you will find yourself back in

your childhood home,

with a loved one no longer,

a younger self, innocent and unburdened


Or perhaps you will visit the city of Macaw

A city that does not exist

at least in your times

But you see it still through the vagueness


A splendor you’ve never seen

An image evoking beauty and grandeur

Instilling feelings of amazement capable

of bringing tears to your eyes


Oh how desperate we may cling to these dreams while knowing

Like fact separating from fiction

Like all dreams day or night, and like all time traveling machines

We open our eyes and find ourselves,


Home, home in our present timeline

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I think one by one, we all free ourselves from the chains we have chained ourselves to.

“As they say ‘to be in the world, but not of the world.’ You can go to the Himalayas and miss it completely, and you can be stuck in the middle of New York and be very spiritual. I mean, I noticed in certain places, like New York, it brings out a certain thing in myself. If I go to some place like Switzerland, I find a lot of uptight people because they’re living amongst so much beauty there’s no urgency in trying to find the beauty within themselves. If you’re stuck in New York you have to somehow look within yourself - otherwise you’d go crackers. So, in a way, it’s good to be able to go in and out of both situations. Most people think when the world gets itself together we’ll all be okay. I don’t see that situation arriving. I think one by one, we all free ourselves from the chains we have chained ourselves to. But I don’t think that suddenly some magic happens and the whole lot of us will all be liberated in one throw.”

- George Harrison, in “The Beatles: Off The Record 2 - The Dream is Over: Off the Record” (Omnibus Press, Dec 15, 2009) (via Whiskey River)

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Fausto Puglisi On the Past, Present, and Future of Roberto Cavalli

Fausto Puglisi On the Past, Present, and Future of Roberto Cavalli

“That’s when I realized, I was holding on to a Roberto Cavalli outfit and throwing away my relationship,” Carrie Bradshaw mused on Sex and the City while fighting with Aidan. He needed closet space, she needed couture. We know the outcome of that doomed relationship, because the choice should never be made between men and fashion. Cavalli outlives it all, even if there is a


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Above the Clouds


Radio static and cracked leather,

We cruise above

the clouds and weather,

In a vibrant nostalgia of

Purples and pinks,

Thrust back in time

Before eyes blink.

-

Happily trapped

we float abound,

Peacefully protected

from the sound,

Of everything expected

To keep our thoughts infected

With a future we don’t want around.

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UNITED STATES—If there was anything I learned studying psychology, especially the power of dreams it’s the fact that a vast majority of our dreams are a direct result of triggers that transpire during the day. Things we’ve seen, we’ve watched or encountered even for a mere 20 seconds can lead to a bad dream or what I would prefer to call a nightmare.

I’m a firm believer that dreams are about good things, nightmares are all about the bad things. I hate sleeping because I have these odd premonitions if that makes any sense. Things happen, and I have these triggers in real life that what I dreamt about just transpired in real life and to a ‘T.’ Trust me I know it sounds weird, some people might even call it déjà vu, but it’s not quite that for me.

The reason I’m bringing this all up as I recently had a bad nightmare this week, one that rattled me out of my sleep. That is something that rarely happens. I’ve had one nightmare I recalled vividly as long as I lived that I have never discussed and I probably never will discuss because the visceral details of this dream haunted me and it was so palpable it was haunting. Maybe I’ll deal with that when the time comes, but I’m not ready to discuss it.

However, my most recent transpired a few days ago. About 11 years ago I was robbed at gunpoint. I remember the day as if it happened yesterday. It was Labor Day 2010 and all I could remember was seeing my life flash in front of my eyes and the thought of all these things I wanted to accomplish never coming to fruition was just a tough pill to swallow. I managed to survive unharmed physically, but the emotional trauma has haunted me ever since. I’m always checking anyone who is behind me and I’m extra cautious about carrying my wallet. That fear of someone targeting me because of my wallet, which I always keep in my front pocket, has always concerned me.

With this latest nightmare I felt I was the target of several people, it was in the middle of the night, and I could remember leaving my belongings locked in my car as I tried to outwit the goons. I ran to my house and I couldn’t get in because I didn’t have my keys so I was begging for whoever was at home that time to open the door. They eventually did, as the goons hovered around as the police were called. I was nervous about my wallet and keys for some odd reason and I decided to venture back to my car which was a short distance to try to retrieve them. All I could remember was being startled by being accustomed by someone before waking up.

I don’t know why this nightmare stuck with me, because I hadn’t dreamt or had any bouts of anxiety about that robbery in years. It was after I spoke to a therapist shortly after the incident she noted I had a lot of anxiety, a mast majority as a direct result of caring about everyone in my family and putting everyone’s needs before mines. Not sure precisely why that seemed to put me at ease, it did. However, 10 years later, why now? Why are triggers taking place now? I haven’t watched any movies as of late about robberies, I haven’t heard of anyone being robbed, I can’t recall watching anything on the news about any robberies? What was the trigger? Was there something in the back of my mind that I pushed away that finally came to the forefront?

I don’t know and that is the frustrating element because I want answers that I unfortunately cannot obtain answers to at the moment. Maybe it was the fact that I never got justice after filing the police report all those years ago. I was never updated by the police that the suspect sin my robbers were caught and jailed for their actions. Heck, if I’m being honest I never expected that result anyway, but I’m rattled after all this time I’ve had such a vivid nightmare about a trauma that haunted me then, that I made peace with and realized I was no victim, I was a survivor.

Are my dreams trying to tell me something that I have no clue about? I don’t know and I guess over the next few weeks I’m going to attempt to grapple with that truth and try to have some sort of finality with it. In life bad things happen, and it’s not how you react to those things that matter, it’s how you endure and push through against all odds when they seem impossible at times. It’s just a dream that is what I have to remind myself.

Bad Dreams Are A Trigger Of What? was originally published on Canyon News

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This is a birthday present for the spectacular @101systemglitch101 ~

I know I didn’t need to make something else but I wanted to 💜


Today was an exciting day for you, it was your birthday! You didn’t want it to become a huge event but you had people you wanted to spend this day with. Blue has already been blowing up your phone, saying how excited he was for you to come over later. Apparently Blue had set up a whole night for you, Stretch, and himself. A night with the two of them sounded amazing, especially with the tall cuddle bug known as Stretch. It was already the afternoon so you’d head over once it started to get dark.


What you weren’t expecting was a knock on your door already. With a confused glance at your entrance, you stood and went to open your door. You knew Blue could get impatient but-


Who stood at your door wasn’t Blue, but instead Stretch. A lazy smile spanned his skull and he gave you a wave. In his hand he held a bouquet of your favourite flowers, and he caught you looking at them. A chuckle left him and he held them out to you.


“I knew you liked them so I thought I’d get some for ya.” He told you, and you felt your cheekbones heating up a little.


“That’s so sweet, thank you Stretch!” You said and gave him a big smile.


“So what are you doing here?” You asked as you indicated him to follow you inside.


“Thought maybe you and I could spend some time together before you come over.” He told you, and you turned back to look at him with a blush. You were a bit in shock.


“I.. I would love that!” You stammered and gave him a big grin before heading to get a vase for the flowers.


Stretch chuckled as he followed you, hands going into his pockets as he leaned against the frame of the kitchen. He watched as you filled a vase halfway with water, then unwrapped the flowers and gently set them inside. You placed them on the counter and started to fiddle with them to make sure they were perfect. Once they were to your liking, you turned to your visitor and clapped your hands, then clasping them together as you smiled.


“So.. what do you have planned?” You asked.


“You’ll see~” Stretch chimed and grinned as he stood straight.


He walked to your front door and locked it then turned to you, whom had followed him curiously. He offered you his large hand, and you stepped forward with no hesitation. You trusted this bonehead with every bone in your body.


“Ready to head out?” He asked, getting a nod in return.


With a smile he took a shortcut, teleporting you two to your first destination.


The place that he took the two of you was a small cafe downtown. Flowers sat neatly outside and the label on the front window was hand painted in gold script. It was a pretty exterior, looking old fashioned but in a good way. The soft smell of pastries and coffee hit your nose and you let out a happy noise. This made Stretch chuckle as he led you to an outdoor table that was reserved for the two of you.


On the table set an adorable stuffed bear holding a heart bearing your name on it. You let out a coo and picked it up, hugging it to your chest as the both of you sat down.


“Awe thank you Stretch!” You said happily.


“Anything for you darlin’.” He hummed and smiled, resting his chin on his hand as he watched you.


Soon food was brought out to you without you even needing to order. Your favourite drink as well as your favourite pastries were set in front of you. Stretch could literally see your eyelights sparkle as you set the teddy on your lap and started to eat. You both made idle conversation, you eating your sweet treats while he sipped a honey latte and snacked on a simple donut. He just found you too adorable as you talked and ate, and he actually paid attention to what you were saying.


“This is great, I’m glad we got to come here before we went to your place~” You hummed as you sipped at your drink.


“Oh we aren’t done yet.” Stretch replied with a hum.


“Oh oka- what?? Where else are we going?” You asked curiously.


“You’ll see.” He told you simply as he finished off his donut.


When the two of you were done eating, Stretch stood and offered you his hand again, and you happily stood and took it. He gave it a gentle squeeze before taking another shortcut.


Where you were next was a huge butterfly sanctuary, encased in glass that glimmered in the sun. You could see plants that almost touched the top of the transparent dome, and little flickers of colors flittering to and fro. Stretch led you through the entrance and to the front desk, where a woman smiled sweetly at the two of you.


“Stretch I assume?” She asked, hands clasped in front of her.


“Yup that’s me.” He told her and she nodded, sweeping her hand to her right, your left.


There was a glass door that presumably led to the rest of the sanctuary.


“Go right through there, the whole place is yours to explore for the next two hours. Please thoroughly enjoy your stay.” She said and gave you both a smile, to which you both returned before heading through.


The moment you both went through you could smell the fresh flowers and could feel the humidity in the air. It was so peacefully silent, and you did a spin, in awe. But you realized.. There was no one else in here, and it clicked. You then turned to Stretch, whom had his hands in his pockets and was smiling adoringly at you.


“Did you rent out this whole place for the two of us?!” You squeaked, feeling your skull heat up.


“Yup.” He said nonchalantly.


You started to go on about how that was too much money for him to spend on you, how you would’ve been happy even if there were people in here. You kept rambling until he gently placed his index phalange on your teeth, making you hush.


“Shh, for you I’ll spend all the money I have, to the very last penny, just to make you happy. Now come, let’s enjoy this, shall we?” He told you with a smile that made you melt. You’re pretty sure your skull was on fire.


You squeaked out an okay and he chuckled, offering you his hand. You took it and felt him intertwined his phalanges with yours as the two of you started to walk through. The paths were slightly narrow to make as much space for foliage as they could. Butterflies fluttered about, all different sizes and colors. It was truly an amazing sight and you couldn’t help but walk slow to be able to take it all in. It made you so happy that Stretch would do something like this for you.


You stopped to look at a pair of monarch butterflies that were sitting prettily on some flowers, hand reaching out slowly to see if one would crawl onto it. What you didn’t expect was it to fly onto your forehead! You let out a small squeal, standing still to make sure it didn’t fly off. Your eyelights crossed trying to look at it, and you could see a bit of its wings.


“Hey Stretch lo-” You had turned to show him and stopped, sentence cut short as your jaw dropped.


Stretch was standing there, basically the butterfly skeleton. Butterflies of all shapes and sizes were on him, including on his skull.


“Guess I’m kind of a butterfly magnet.” He said with a small chuckle.


“It’s what you get for smelling like honey all the time.” You replied with a giggle, and he gave you a dorky smile.


After gently removing the copious amounts of butterflies from him (some still decided to tag along), you two continued to walk around. You both talked and laughed with each other, Stretch cracking his dorky puns as you walked, and you laughing along because you loved him so much. You noticed him looking at you once and a while, and he noticed you looking at him too.


When the two hours had passed, the two of you both headed back towards the entrance. You could see through the glass that the sun was starting to set, and realized how long the two of you had already been on this.. Date? That word made you blush a little. With one last check over for hitchhiking butterflies, you two finally left, waving goodbye to the woman at the desk before heading outside.


“One last stop darlin’.” Stretch told you, and you looked at him in shock, holding your teddy bear close to your chest with your free hand.


Once again Stretch took a shortcut, and you blinked as you looked around. There was nothing but trees, and you were confused.


“Uh.. where are we?” You asked.


“C’mon, this way.” He said and gently tugged you through the trees.


When the trees finally broke apart, you saw what he came to show you and let out a soft gasp. You were atop a sloping cliff, the whole city spanned out below you in the valley. The lights in the city started to come on one by one as night started to creep closer. But what astonished you so much was the amazing view of the sunset. The sky was painted in a multicolor masterpiece of reds, pinks, oranges, and purples, meddling together like a work of art. All the clouds in the sky mimicked the beauty, soft and wispy imitators. The sun was a glimmering golden orb on the horizon, wavering as if waving goodbye to the two of you until tomorrow.


You felt tears coming to your eyesockets as you turned to look at Stretch. He had the most loving smile on his face, directed at no one but you. A few happy tears spilled at you lunged forward and hugged him, face burying into his chest as you murmured thank yous over and over again. You felt his arms wrap around you and his teeth press against your skull, his chest rumbling as he chuckled. His scent wrapped around you comfortingly, a mixture of honey and smoke. It was so perfect, so him.


When you pulled back and his eyelights met yours, you both leaned in on instinct. You felt your skull heating up as the two of you got closer, and your sockets closed. He closed his as well, hands cupping your jaw as he leaned in. A gentle and sweet kiss was pressed to your teeth, short, but perfect. Stretch pulled back slightly after, your foreheads still touching as he smiled at you. He could feel his SOUL thrumming with happiness, as well as yours.


“Happy Birthday Abyss.”

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Your past does not determine your future; you determine what happens in the present and the universe determines the future. The past is merely set in stone and you must act accordingly.

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21 But now God’s righteousness has been revealed apart from the Law, which is confirmed by the Law and the Prophets.22 God’s righteousness comes through the faithfulness of Jesus Christ for all who have faith in him. There’s no distinction. 23 All have sinned and fall short of God’s glory,24 but all are treated as righteous freely by his grace because of a ransom that was paid by Christ…

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