I honestly feel like the reason I have to keep reiterating the same points about characters like N/esta is because there is just a lot of hypocrisy involved in her character and a lot of assumptions that just kind of get tossed out about her. She’s similar to T/amlin and even E/lain in that regard, where the narrative around them is not reliable, and what’s said about them through F/eyre’s point of view is often skewed to fit any given narrative. Needless to say, I have yet another rant about N/esta.
It’s not even that she’s the greatest character ever, or that I would even consider myself a full on N/esta “stan.” But, like many of my rants, her character is usually representative of bigger, overarching problems in SJM’s writing. It’s always relevant to include other characters in this series in any analysis, because the problem is that the villainization of N/esta, or E/lain, or T/amlin, or L/ucien is always dependent on the framing of others. F/eyre is always integral in discussing N/esta because it is through F/eyre that N/esta is foiled. Even a character like R/hysand is worth discussing because, again, the standard of good and bad is always centered back to him.
This post is positioned around the “abuse” category assigned to N/esta. The argument between “stans” and “antis” alike is whether or not N/esta and E/lain are “abusive sisters.” And when this argument comes up, there is always the deployment of personal experiences, articles, sources about abuse, etc., -- which is great, and reiterates an understanding of the importance of these topics. The problem is the unreliable narrative voice and the distinction between what is said and what is done. Because when the narrative needs us to feel sympathy for F/eyre, N/esta’s is antagonized, but the actions of N/esta throughout all of the books either jar with it, or completely negate it. Simply put, there is not really enough evidence to classify their relationship as anything. We don’t know. The story isn’t written reliably enough to confirm of negate that. There isn’t. And even the bits of information we do get via F/eyre are often conflicting. Because F/eyre hates N/esta and says she can hear her voice, but then admits that N/esta would have gone Under the Mountain for her, and as we saw with N/esta’s actions, this actually fits exactly in line with that sentiment. The same even goes for E/lain, who sacrifices her marriage and social status to help aid the Night Court when they needed a human emissary. So, can we honestly, truly understand their relationship? Nope. I don’t even think SJM knew, because either she realized just how ridiculous their dynamic was, or she just forgot. In five books, SJM still does not know how to classify their relationship. Because there really isn’t one. And depending on how you read these books, either side is culpable. There wouldn’t be this big a divide if these books were written clearly enough to confirm. And it’s hard when people attach their personal experience to a story not a complete enough to actually back it up. It’s not like we’re reading a story that realistically covers like abuse and trauma. If that were the case, there wouldn’t be a story, because both R/hys and T/amlin would be defined correctly as ugly abusers, there wouldn’t be the need to explain away R/hys’s behavior. There wouldn’t be an argument about either F/eyre was abusive in FAS or SF if this story actually cared about the topics beyond glorifying F/eyre and antagonizing literally everyone else. So yeah, I know this was already a lot, but expect that rant cause it’s totally brewing.
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Art: @xjuliart on Instagram
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Feyre and Rhys ✨🌌🌠
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Just a cute little parallel that I came across:
“There were no cities left in our mortal territory. Though some had sprung up on the main continent, full of art and learning and trade. Elain had once wanted to go with me. I didn’t suppose I’d ever get that chance now.” (ACOMAF - Chapter 14)
“But Elain had seemed more than content to simply watch the humming city, to take in the sparkling strands of faelights strung between buildings and over the squares, to sample any tidbit of food offered by an eager vendor, to listen to minstrels busking by the now-silent fountains. As if my sister, too, had merely been looking for an excuse to get out of the house today.” (ACOFAS - Chapter 15)
Elain + Feyre finally got to explore a city together and Elain was “more than content” to bask in everything that it had to offer. 🥺
It isn’t surprising that Elain enjoys life in Velaris, even though some people try to claim otherwise...
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ART: Stephanie Brown
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“That girl that had needed to be protected, who had craved stability and comfort... she had died Under the Mountain. I had died, and there had been no one to protect me from those horrors before my neck snapped. So I had done it myself.” -The Feyre Cursebreaker, High Lady Of The Night Court
No one above her…..
How can I not stan?
Credit: shadowhunterstiffs (Instagram)
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Sjm still has yet to top A Court of Mist and Fury. It had everything.
I can reread that book everyday.
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do y’all think rhys and feyre would lie in bed thinking about their little baby boy, and just smiling and talking and rhysand starts rubbing feyres belly and talking to nyx and saying how lucky they both are to have this amazing woman in their life and feyre just looks at rhys so in love and so happy that she knows everything she went through was just…worth it.✨
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The thing that gets me about nesta antis is so much of their hate is directed towards her depression and mock her for it and that just feels gross to me. Like ‘oh of course elain and amren chose feyre, why is she whining about it when she pushed them away?’ That’s literally what goes through a depressed person’s head ☠️
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Is it truly that hard to applaud or describe n/esta without bringing up the inner circle? I understand bringing up others for “criticism” barely. But when hyping her up, when the post is specifically about her accomplishments what’s the point in bringing up other characters.
“I know Feyre is known for being strong and having high lords want her but actually n/esta…..”
“morrigan might be a 500+ year old warrior but n/esta..”
“Rhysand is known for having a silver tounge but..”
“Cassian is sweet to Feyre and Morrigan but with n/esta he’s different…..” his mate??? Duh??? You don’t have to bring them up.
Are y’all not tired? If there is just no way to describe or praise her without bringing up other people or rearranging the narrative it just weakens whatever you are trying to point out. Or maybe there’s no point there.
I promise you we can understand what you are trying to say without the other characters randomly being brought up.
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y’all someone just said feyre was the reason nesta almost married thomas the r*pist. that nesta felt so uncomfortable and unloved in her house that feyre, get this, pushed her towards thomas.
its not as if when she heard nesta wanted to marry thomas, she immediately said anything to get nesta to reconsider, whether it makes nesta angry with her, and its not as if when she was taken not knowing what would await her in prythian she made sure nesta knew why she was not to marry thomas.
feyres dreams was to have nesta and elain marry so that they could be sustained and happy, but no way in hell was feyre going to let nesta marry an abuser like thomas. no she would have preferred to suffer more years carrying the weight of her sisters on her back than ever “push” nesta on to the horrible life that would have welcomed her.
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If people were to just talk about the ship they like and stop meddling with the opposing ship and stop detracting from the other character, especially when it has not even created drama, we will live in peace. I did the test and entered Elain's tag, generally I do not do it for fear of seeing how they hate a character who still does not tell her story (as they did with Nesta) and there were many disparaging posts directed at Elain, of her as a person and their hobbies, entering the profiles of these publications and seeing the content of these, is not something surprising and they generate two questions: do they hate Elain and therefore ship those characters? or because of a ship they start to hate Elain ?.
Whatever the reason, and this applies to any characters, you should stop talking about characters that you don't like, because I think it becomes almost the obsession of some people to do this.
If you hate a character, just stop talking about it, stop appearing in the feed of people who do like them, and please stop making fun of real people's situations, experiences and personalities.
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High Lady of The Night Court
art by @art_hola on instagram
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Didn’t Feyre herself say that growing up, she could couldn’t tell who was worse to who (in regards to her and Nesta’s relationship)? I think that was one of the reasons why I wasn’t as anti-Nesta when reading the books. I definitely didn’t like her, but we’re told that they were both horrible to each other.
here's the thing:
Feyre during that scene and when she says she was "just as bad as Nesta" is obviously showing signs of being an abused person. shes thinking "yes maybe it was my fault too, maybe I was mean and did stuff to provoke her behavior towards me" because Feyre at this point wants to just mend the bridge between her and Nesta. she wants to move forward, and instead of getting the apology she rightfully deserves she's being complacent and is willing to make herself the bad guy as well for Nesta and for herself so that they can move on, bc she knows Nesta will never admit she was at fault. so instead she tries to take half of the blame as well. its why she subconsciously thinks "yes it was my fault how she treated me bc perhaps I did the same"
this mentality you see often in victims of domestic abuse. (this is an example) women when being abused by their spouses will start to say "no it was my fault I provoked him, I shouldn't have said this or done that, I shouldn't have provoked him, we're both a fault" but we know the truth, they didn't do anything to have deserved the abuse they were given. you can also see it with Feyre and Tamlin, after Tamlin physically abuses her in the study what does Feyre start to think? "maybe I shouldn't have pushed, he has trauma, he wants to keep me safe, I should be pushing too hard" Feyre is trying to be complacent here but like I said, nothing she did deserves that outcome.
just like Feyre didn't do anything to have deserved the abuse Nesta inflicted on her, as much as Feyre tries to tell herself she deserved it. just by the interactions between Nesta and Feyre alone, you see Feyre was not the same as Nesta. Nesta insulted and Feyre either ignored it or tried to reason with Nesta. once did she ever stand up for herself, and that cant be seen as Feyre being "just as bad" as Nesta. yes, we don't know everything that happened in the cabin years, but I'm thinking of just going by acotar alone, miss Nesta immediately emotionally abuses her, and what does Feyre do? she ignores it and excuses it as "oh well Nesta always been that way, she's a fiery person" and at the table when they're eating and Nesta starts insulting Feyre again, slut-shaming her, saying she's not special, that she will be forgotten, what does Feyre do? she keeps her cool, she stays quiet. she doesn't start insulting back, she doesn't do the shit Nesta does.
that doesn't look like someone who was just as bad as Nesta. that doesn't look like someone who was just as horrible to the other person, does it?
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Feyre ship elriel tho? She imagined that painting of az and elain and questioned elain's mating bond. Dont forget she's just took 2/3 months to move on from tamlin. She's really sucks meanwhile nesta is definitely on gwynriel side and i'm sure she will support gwynriel all the time. Shouldnt you like nesta more?
okay well im not gonna stop loving feyre bc of who she ships azriel with lol. trust me im aware this is one of her biggest flaws.
but why is it bad that she took 2/3 months to move on from tamlin? everyone has their own time frame as to when they are ready to move on from a past relationship, and we definitely shouldn’t judge. besides this wasnt just some random dude, feyre was getting over her abuser. plus, she had a whole ass support group to show her how bad she had it with tamlin.
nesta, well we dont know if she’s actually gwynriel do we now? yes shes friends with gwyn and az but shes still elains sister and for some reasons nestas still obsessed with elain so if nesta knew elains feelings for az she would probably encourage her. nesta atm would be both elriel and gwynriel.
but still im not going to love a character based on who they ship azriel with. who feyre likes az with the most well thats her preference but its not a big enough of a deal to make me love her any less. same with nesta, idc who she ships, it wont excuse what shes done and said in the past/present so it definitely wont change my perspective on nesta.
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Rant about Feyre in Acosf
I can’t even re-read acosf for Feyre moments because of how nesta badly treated Feyre.
Feyre is arguably the only person in the inner circle (beside nestas mate) that stuck by her side acosf (not that’s it’s the IC obligation) Feyre is the only person in the fucking series who continued to save her life over and over. She has done more for nesta than nesta parents combined. And all she did was berate and mock Feyre in her point of view.
Wanting her to die over elain, complaining about a painting when she told Feyre to piss off about her house, blaming Feyre while she was PUSHING and ARGUING with amren and Elain, her dropping to her fucking knees to apologize to Amren who has defended her for ONE year, but not her sister who never left her side.
People say “we can’t be upset over things that happen when they were children” they aren’t children in acosf, they weren’t children in the events of acotar either.
And than that damn Amren Apartment scene, I can’t get over it. Amren and Rhysand were the only people who voted against giving her the weapons, Feyre automatically said yes, she was heavily pregnant, and haven’t berated or done a anything wrong to nesta the entire book.
Trauma is an explanation to why you act the way you do and treat people the way you do NOT a justification. Not making it okay.
Amren was making points and Nesta got backed into a wall, and her first thought was to tell her sister she was going to die… we rightfully talk about IC actions as leaders and how they react but you think reacting like that is a Queen? A leader? Someone who should wield unimaginable power? Nesta AGREED to keep it a secret. So to turn this scene into anything else that nesta continuously using Feyre as some sort of punching bag is wrong.
Nesta knew she was wrong, she saw Feyre face crumbled and the words written is that says that Nesta didn’t care.
And EVEN AFTER her sister use her death and nephews death as an argument point. She maturely and correctly maintained her anger towards her Rhysand, who should’ve explained more of the risk of the pregnancy (as Feyre already knew it was going to be a hard birth) The only thing that should come out of that scene is Shaming Rhysand for trying to find a solution without telling Feyre.. NOT praising nesta for telling her that way. She did nothing right in that scene.
Please don’t come in the comment section arguing. I truly don’t care. People pick and choose what they want to be angry about and what they want to ignore. And people ignore that nesta had no right to treat Feyre like that. If Feyre was random or even her sister who did nothing for her than who cares. But as nesta sole provider since they were children, Feyre deserved more respect.
Don’t come into the comment section talking about the IC, because I’m talking about Feyre. Anything you believe the Inner Circle has said to Feyre, Nesta has said to Feyre. For example, She literally called Feyre an animal for having sex, She told Feyre that no one will remember her. She threatened to slit Feyre throat. But will you ever hear anyone calling her out? Nope.
I can’t even enjoy the book. The next book will at least give me some peace when reading about Feyre.
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Feyres sisters, Second And Third-In-Command of the Night Court.
Credit: atouchofmagicdesigns/simarts_ (Instagram)
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High Lord and High Lady Of The Night court
Credit: anaerron (Twitter)
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Nesta: Your past does not excuse your actions
(I am not tagging anti because this post focuses more on being critical of Nesta's character/behavior than outright hating or shitting on her. If you’re one of the few who do not use any excuses towards Nesta’s behavior then this is not addressed to you.)
Since Sjm won't address the toxicity that goes on in her fandom when regarding those who use Nesta's past as a defense to the emotional, mental, and verbal abuse she inflicted on Feyre, and her behavior to others, I will use a quote from Leigh Bardguo from the podcast Write or Die, s2 ep1 to support my view.
For context: Leigh is talking about why she didn't give the Darkling a redemption arc etc. She then goes on to say, "Don't pretend that just because you had a rough childhood you get to be an asshole and an abuser."
What Bardugo said here is pure facts. Your childhood will never be an excuse for the way you treat others. Yes, your childhood can explain certain things, and it can explain why someone is the way they are. Nesta's childhood explains why she's cold and reserved and pushes others away. But it by no means excuses the abuse she inflicted on Feyre and even on Elain if we really wanna talk about it. (I am in no way excusing Elain for the part she played in Feyre's abuse, simply stating she was also a victim of Nesta's abuse in certain aspects)
Throughout A court of silver flames, this is exactly what Nesta did when acknowledging her behavior of all those years to Feyre and her behavior to others. She used the abuse of her Grandmother, the neglect and manipulation of her mother, the feeling of lack of love from her father, and the pressure she felt from society and parents to marry into an advantageous marriage, as well as the neglect her father displayed during the cabin years to excuse her treatment of Feyre during the years at the cabin and presently.
Instead of expressing regret for the actions and words she committed, she uses her past as a shield, as a valid reason as to why she abused her sister for years. She blames her parents and her upbringing for the way she is now, but the only thing you can blame those parents for is the childhood they gave her that lacked any warmth, compassion, or love. But Nesta's behavior, her attitude towards literally anyone, cannot be excused nor justified by her past. That she must take accountability on her own, something she has yet to actually do without making an excuse for herself and to ask forgiveness for the one person who deserves it.
Before anyone comes at me, I'm going to address it first. Rhysand. Yes, Rhys is an asshole, and yes he has committed abusive actions in the past. I can wholly admit that because it's the truth that I cannot nor will deny. But here's the difference: he never uses his childhood or trauma as an excuse. Remember it's usually some of the stans who do this for him, who use his trauma as a shield. This also goes to the Nesta stans because yes many of y'all do this often. But Rhys has never used his past as an excuse, for being an asshole. He owns up to it. When he gets called out on his shit, he admits to it and apologizes instead of using buts and ifs and half-assed excuses.
Nesta stans (some) have a habit of using her upbringing as a defense for her cruel behavior, not just to Feyre but others, and when you try to call them out on it, they'll deny it and say they're just "explaining her behavior not excusing it" which is literally bullshit because we all know what they're doing except for apparently them.
The reason I am using Leigh Bardugos words on the Darkling is because Leigh Bardugo is one of the most highly regarded authors in the book community. So if you cant take my word on it, that your past doesn't excuse your present actions, take it from Leigh Bardugo, who is a beloved and highly esteemed author, that I know many of us respect. I hope that you hear her words and understand there is no excuse whatsoever for what Nesta did. I hope you hear her words and understand that I nor others are not being "unsympathetic" to people like Nesta who had a hard life. I simply will not have her past be used as protection to Nesta's shitty behavior and treatment of Feyre and others.
"Don't pretend that just because you had a rough childhood you get to be an asshole and an abuser." -Leigh Bardugo
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