#psychiatric drugs

[chrishoughton]

Is Cricket meant to have ADHD? My brother has predominantly-hyperactive/impulsive type and I have predominantly-inattentive type and we can both relate. Episodes like "Quiet Please" and "Trivia Night" seem to imply it as well.

I've tried to answer this question before but because I receive it so often, I'll take another stab at answering it.

I'm so happy so many kids relate to Cricket and Tilly. Many of those kids also relate to Cricket and Tilly on a deeper level, due to a particular diagnosis they may have received. However, I'm very hesitant to confirm any particular diagnosis for Cricket and Tilly for two main reasons: 1.) As much as we try to write Cricket and Tilly as if they're real people, they're not. They are cartoon characters instead of multifaceted emotionally-complicated human beings. I would consider it unethical to give a cartoon character a DSM diagnosis which might ultimately lead kids to seek out a similar diagnosis because they relate to similar behaviors of said diagnosed cartoon characters. I like to think of Cricket and Tilly as unique kids, rather than kids with a particular diagnosis. And I hope kids who have received some type of mental diagnosis, also see themselves as unique individuals, rather than someone who is in need of "fixing."

2.) My main hesitancy around these diagnostic labels is for no other reason than our society's main source of treating these types of diagnoses: drugs. I'm not denying the existence of these different learning abilities or different ways of thinking, I'm simply against the way we treat these "disorders." I think psychiatric drugs are best used in rare cases and generally for a short amount of time, with a plan for the individual to get off of the drug (research long-term use of psychiatric drugs and how psychotropic drug tolerance works- "Your Drug May Be Your Problem" is a great read). For some people, psychiatric drugs carry with them the potential for some extremely dangerous side effects. Further complicating things, these drug side effects are often mislabeled as additional mental health symptoms. Also, due to tolerance build-up, the desired effects of these drugs usually wear off after continuing the same drug treatment for years. This tolerance often leads to higher dosages or more psych drugs to achieve the original desired effect. To make the situation more complicated, psychiatric drugs also create an intense chemical dependency that is rarely talked about and very misunderstood in the medical community. After many years of use, these drugs eventually have very little effect other than staving off withdrawal effects from said drug. An adult choosing to take psychiatric drugs is well within their rights. But children? Who have developing brains? How confident are we that this is the best course of treatment?

I hope you can appreciate my sensitivity around this issue due to the fact that I've been dependent on the SSRI, Paxil (paroxetine) for 24 years now. I was put on it as a child at 10 years old for anxiety attacks and 24 years later, I'm now slowly weaning off of the drug. In some ways, I wish I was never given the drug (which was eventually labeled as unsafe for children and given a black box warning after years of being on the market- whoops!) but in other ways, I'm very thankful for the painful lessons I've learned.

This long awful process of withdrawal has changed my views on the outdated "disease-based" model of looking at mental health. The emerging "trauma-based" model makes a lot more sense to me, both in terms of diagnosing and treatment. This model encourages treatment/healing of the source of the pain, rather than treatment (or numbing) of the symptoms. This model asks "what happened to you?" rather than "what's wrong with you?"

At the risk of looking like a radical, I'll end it there. DISCLAIMER: If you are on any psychiatric drugs, do NOT discontinue use without talking to a trusted doctor (who understands psychiatric drug withdrawal/de-prescribing). And never cold turkey from any psych drug- it's too hard on your CNS and can cause an incredible amount of long-lasting emotional and physical pain. The decision of whether or not to pursue treatment through psychiatric drugs is a very personal decision that should be made by the individual, guided by informed consent from a doctor about the potential benefits and risks that come with any particular drug.

I share this only to speak about my personal experience on the subject. I don't mean to offend anyone nor tell anyone what they should do or believe. To anyone suffering mentally or emotionally, please know that in many ways, I understand and I wish you the best. 💚

#anon ask #psychiatric drugs #mental health #diagnosis

[er-cryptid]

Psychiatric Drugs and the Nervous System

Psychoactives -- inhibitory or excitatory effects -- have side effects because the drug works on different neural pathways

Agonists -- mimic the effect of a neurotransmitter -- example: Prozac is an agonist of the neurotransmitter serotonin

Antagonists -- inhibit the effect of a neurotransmitter

#medblr #studyblr #notes #psych #psychology #nervous system #anatomy and physiology #anatomy #physiology #psychiatric drugs #pharm #pharma #pharmacology

[feathersof-hope]

Mental illness is such a lonely thing to go through. I have lovely friends and they do their best, but there are things they just can’t understand. 

Pain is the loneliest thing in the world. You work hard not to allow it to alienate you, but it does anyway. When you have seen the abyss, you carry it with you.

When I told my friends my psychiatrist was reducing my drugs, they were happy and proud. When my doctor told me he was taking some of my pills away, I was terrified. 

The knowledge that I will never heal makes it to hard to see my loved ones’ hope for my future. 

#mental illness #inspired by #turtles all the way down #john green #but also by my shitty life #i'm so scared #who will I be without my meds? #Is the person I am now created by the meds? #will I disappear with them? #bipolar #psychiatric drugs

[alsanabel-psychiatric]

يقوم العاملين في الطب النفسي بدور هام في التوعية الصحية والوقاية من الأمراض النفسية. يقومون بتوفير المعلومات حول العوامل المؤثرة في الصحة النفسية وأساليب الوقاية من الاضطرابات النفسية. يشجعون على الحفاظ على نمط حياة صحي وتنمية استراتيجيات التعامل مع التوتر والضغوط النفسية.

#مركز_السنابل_للصحة_النفسية

700 83 700

#الصحة_النفسية #التوعية #مركز_السنابل_للصحة_النفسية #alsanabel_specialized_psychiatric_center #mentalhealthawareness

#qatarlife #psychiatric illness #psychiatric treatment #mental health awareness #mental health #dohalife #psychiatric drugs #mental health support #psychologist #mental wellbeing #mental help

[crimeronan]

the mental health clinic i'm going to tomorrow to manage my psych meds has pretty much exclusively dogshit reviews, which is to be expected because it's a medicaid clinic. even in portland you can expect that the american healthcare system is actively trying to kill poor people, nobody hates a poor person like a mental health professional. HOWEVER since i don't actually want to develop a rapport with a therapist or say anything true in my sessions or do anything except get my prescriptions and get out, here are the BEST THINGS i've learned:

providers are so overworked they will never remember your name or your patient history

you will have a different therapist every time

you will be in a different room every time bc no one has an office

the clinic will refuse to schedule you for therapy more than once a month if you "seem functional"

former employees attest that every therapist quits within 4 months because it's such an unrelenting hellscape

former employees attest that all the policies are made by a clinic owner with no background in trauma-informed care who fucking hates high-maintenance patients and wants to get you out the door as fast as possible

former employees and clients alike attest that the only thing anybody here cares about is avoiding on-paper malpractice suits instead of providing patient care

THE ONE SAD THING I'VE LEARNED:

the main psychiatrist is catholic. and hates medication.

THE GOOD NEWS:

i am a heterosexual cisgender white woman with good heterosexual cisgender friends who loves to work hard for money and wants to settle down someday with a husband and have babies and knows SO MUCH about jesus because i love jesus and He's going to heal me :)

THE BAD NEWS:

i am protestant.

#which is to say i dont know the catholic rituals well enough to fake a catholic background. tragique. #you can laugh at this it is funny. i'm going into this with the mindset of a spy undercover in deep enemy territory #ive got my objective. ive got my role to play. i am a great actress. #and if they won't give me what i need i can just call my PCP and be like #hey my meds havent changed in seven years. can you manage them so i dont die #i feel like john mulaney in his latest special. you gotta find the lowest rated doctor to get your drugs #medical abuse #medical malpractice #psychiatric abuse #i guess #bipolar blogging #adhd tag

[only-shadows-dwell-where-we-are]

Redwood Pyschiatric Institute - Part 5

MASTERLIST - PART 1 - PART 2 - PART 3 - PART 4

CWs: pyschiatric whump, mental hospital whump, nasogastric tube whump, IV mentioned, force-feeding

"Doctor Wilson, James is continuing to refuse food." The orderly informed his boss.

"Thank you." Doctor Wilson acknowledged from behind his desk. He stood, sighing. "Time to resort to our last option."

-----

James was sitting on the floor, back against the wall with his arms clutched to his chest. He was silent as the nurses spoke to him, trying to coax him into eating his food.

"Good afternoon, James." Doctor Wilson greeted his patient as he entered the padded cell. "I hear you're continuing to refuse food. Is that correct?"

James nodded weakly, not meeting Wilson's gaze.

"Is he drinking any water?" Doctor Wilson asked the nurses, who shook their heads.

"Won't touch anything. We've had to resort to giving his medication by injection again."

"Oh James, progress with you is never easy, is it?" Doctor Wilson sighed as he got to his knees in front of James. "Let's get some food in you, alright?"

James began to shake as Doctor Wilson picked him up by his arm. "No, nonono-" he began to mumble.

The orderlies helped drag James over to the bed, placing him down on his back. They propped a pillow behind his back to keep him upright. The orderlies pulled out leather cuffs which they attached to each of James wrists and ankles, tying him to the bed. Doctor Wilson pulled over a metal trolley filled with supplies.

"I'm going to insert a nasogastric tube, so that we can feed you since you refuse to eat or drink anything on your own. It's a tube that goes in your nostril and down into your stomach. It's painless, and if you behave we can get this over with quickly." He informed his patient.

James' heart fell, fear crawling up into his throat as he watched Doctor Wilson snap on a pair of nitrile gloves.

The doctor unwrapped a long, sterile tube and moved towards James, who paled.

"Relax. The more relaxed you are, the less this will hurt." Doctor Wilson said.

And then, he was forcing the long thin tube up James' right nostril. It burned as Doctor Wilson slid it further and further. James could feel the tube go down his throat. He gagged against it, feeling the tube scrape inside his throat.

"Swallow." Doctor Wilson instructed flatly.

James involuntarily obeyed, tears smarting in his eyes at the rawness and discomfort.

The doctor taped the other end of the tube down on James' cheek. He attached excess tubing, which led to a small container of nutrients hanging from an IV stand.

"Alright. Now that the tube is in, you'll be fed regularly at meal times through the tube until you can demonstrate that you can eat properly on your own. I'll insert an IV as well, since you haven't been drinking any water."

Doctor Wilson picked up a small butterfly needle and an alcohol wipe, the latter of which he used to wipe the skin of James' elbow. He then slid the needle into the vein, and then he pulled the needle out, leaving the cannula in place in James' arm. The Doctor taped the cannula in place also then connected the tubing to the IV stand so it began to dispense the fluid.

"You will be monitored regularly, and all your medications will be injected via IV." Doctor Wilson said.

And then, he left.

---------

"How are you feeling, James?" Doctor Wilson greeted as he stepped into the room.

James lifted his head slowly to look up. His limbs felt less sluggish than they had several days ago, but the feeding tube had begun to disperse the liquid down his throat and his stomach churned at the uncomfortable sensation.

James mumbled incoherently, a single tear slid down his cheek.

Doctor Wilson ran a hand through James's hair, sighing softly. "Oh, James. This is what happens when you don't behave. We are doing what is best for you. The sooner you accept that, the easier it will be for you."

----

James sat in Doctor Wilson's office, his eyes spaced out and staring distantly into the wall.

"James."

Everything was fuzzy, blurry. His head pounded. And something was slipping down his chin. Was that-

"Wipe that off his face, please."

An orderly bent into his face, and wiped his chin, then stood up. James didn't even twitch.

"James. Are you with us?"

"Huh?" James finally responded, though there was no physical response.

"You're feeling better, aren't you? No delusions?" Doctor Wilson asked.

"Iambetter..." James slurred.

"Good."

@jazatronasmr @onthishamsterwheel @bumpthumpwhump @bloodsweatandpotato @whatiswhump @jancameforthewhump @ratking-whump @dream-whump @inkstainsonmyhands12 @halstead-shaw13 @sparrowsage @sowhumpful

#whump community #whumblr #noncon drugging #psychiatric hospital whump #redwood psychiatric #nasogastric tube whump #force feeding whump

[neuroticboyfriend]

if i ever end up in the psych ward again (god forbid), i am going to fight them if they try to attack/restrain me. i will bite you, i will punch you, i will kick you, whatever the fuck i can manage. i will make you HURT for hurting me and everyone else that you either have already hurt or will come to hurt. i've been through too much shit to be docile anymore. if there's ever a next time i am coming for blood (and free benzos). the ward will not know peace and if i could unionize my fellow patients i would.

#julian rants #psych ward #drugs tw #abuse tw #psych survivor #psychiatric abuse #antipsychiatry #antipsych

[transmutationisms]

i mentioned lying to my doctor to my grandma (horrendous decision btw) and i just got stuck thinking like. in her day if i had disclosed how i feel to a doctor truly and honestly it would result in me being brought to a ward against my will and given electric shocks to “correct” me. something most everyone agrees with as despicable. and yet it doesn’t occur to her at all that if the medical world back then was so violent and wrong about so much that today’s logically could not have gotten rid of all of its problems in the course of less than a century lol

it's honestly interesting imo that you say "most everyone agrees" that forced institutionalisation/treatment are wrong, because like.... these things still happen! fundamentally the medical encounter is not structured to protect patient autonomy or even patient health; it is structured to promote physician authority to enforce social and medical standards of normality and wellness upon the patient's body and mind. there are specific modes of doing so that have declined in popularity (electropuncture, lobotomy [tho it's not true that the latter never occurs anymore either]) but there are others that are on the rise (psychotropic drugs, bariatric surgery). standards for patient consent have certainly changed, but these have never been equally applied (consider the de facto and de jure carveouts for patients who cannot read or speak in the physician's language; who are uninsured in countries w/out universal healthcare or non-citizens in countries with it; or, and this is crucial, who are simply declared to be too sick-insane to act in their own interests and whose consent is therefore explicitly not sought) and the standards are fairly toothless anyway, not to mention incapable of addressing the massive social-economic power differential between physician and patient, and also designed more to protect the physician from legal liability than anything else.

anyway my point is just that violation of patient autonomy is not something that can be fixed by, like, telling doctors to be nicer or care more, and it's not something that's lessening over time because the medical profession as it presently exists is coercive and authoritarian structurally and philosophically. an actually liberatory provision of medicine and health care requires a total paradigm shift (sorry) in terms of how we understand health, patient authority/autonomy, and the valuation of human bodies and lives.

#wrt psychotropic drugs i do not oppose drug seeking or taking lol #i am in fact so pro drugs that i think even the ones prescribed by physicians sometimes have value #my point is just that their widespread use is part of a neuropsychiatric discourse of normativity and productivity #and that patients should be given actual information about what these drugs can and cannot do (ie not a 'chemical imbalance' lie lmao) #and should be flying the plane so to speak when it comes to any tx plan but esp under the psychiatric umbrella

[notquiteaghost]

my sister saw the psych & he said he won't refer her to a personality disorder unit because they're all privately run so you have to apply for funding and it's a whole thing. he didn't ask if she wanted to deal with that, he decided he didn't want to deal with that. instead he has prescribed her clozapine, an antipsychotic you have to start on an ineffectually low dose of in case it makes your heart dangerously slow. it weakens your immune system, increases your chance of seizures, may cause heart problems, and can cause a 'serious movement disorder' that 'may not be reversible'. she is still, also, on the highest dose of lithium they can give her. and she will continue to be on the lithium until the clozapine does something. but fuck forbid she has to go to a meeting!!!

#yelling at clouds #i am apocalyptically angry about this #EVERYONE ELSE involved in her care agrees the PDU is what she needs #but this one guy. this one fucking guy who just met her. doesn't want to deal with the admin. #so is instead attempting to chemically lobotomize her with drugs that might fucking kill her anyway #i am not anti medication. to be very clear. i think medication is a marvel #but psychiatric medication specifically is mostly fucking guesswork because we still don't know shit about how the brain functions #and psychiatry does not exist to help people #why are we trying the drug that can KILL HER. that can just fucking STOP HER ORGANS FROM WORKING. before we try THERAPY. #TALKING. IN A SAFE ENVIRONMENT. ZERO LIKELIHOOD OF IT CAUSING HER TO HAVE A FUCKING SEIZURE. #i want every conservative member of parliament burnt at the fucking stake.

[louderfade]

from a 1970s Japanese ad for Nortriptyline Hydrochloride

#psychiatric drug advertisements #japanese ads

[feralthembo]

imagine if you could choose to check yourself into a psychiatric ward for an amount of time you choose for free and it wasnt just a carceral thing but like. a medical establishment meant to care for people.

#if u dont know what im talking about here this post isnt for u its for my fellow psychiatric abuse survivors #some of us find some stability in the environment of a psych ward that can help when evrythings topsy turvy #i just wish i could do that kinda thing without getting restraints and drugs used on me yknow? #but i have triggers doctors tend to get to in inpatient that make me super violent and like #god i just wish they knew how to talk to people #and also the bill. #a bitch doesnt have insurance #but yeah i could do with a week of observation and assembly of a care team #could you fucking imagine

[queerpossums]

anti consumption sounds like a great philosophy until the mood stabilizers stop working

#anti consumerism #anti consumption #anti capitalism #consumerism #zero waste #environment #sustainability #no ethical consumption under capitalism #mood stabilizers #lithium #mood disorder #psychiatric medication #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd meme #actually bpd #actually psychotic #cw drugs #cw psychiatry #cw mood stabilizers #cw medication #cw mania #bipolar #bipolar disorder

[alsanabel-psychiatric]

People who work the night shift may have a 33% higher risk of depression than people who work during the day.

#psychiatric illness #mental health #mentalheathawareness #psychiatric drugs #psychiatry

[officialpenisenvy]

god im fucking exhausted i hate this shit

#asked my psych if i could get anything “to focus better” and he put me on 900mg of my anxiety meds. you know the ones that make me sleepy. #im so tired im so tired im SO tired of the psychiatric industrial complex. im this close to doing hard drugs to focus

[ovaruling]

got put on seroquel until i can get in to see a neurologist bc my sleep deprivation is at an all time rock bottom rn and im…….scared of seroquel tbh 😭 heard nothing but terrible things….and the withdrawals and such…….but god im so desperate to sleep

anyone here been on it pls lmk if it was terrible for you…��

#it’s been 13 yrs since i’ve been on psychiatric drugs and i’m so worried abt The Process again #but like. i need to sleep so bad i’m gonna cry

[only-shadows-dwell-where-we-are]

Redwood Pyschiatric Institute - Part 6

MASTERLIST - PART 1 - PART 2 - PART 3 - PART 4 - PART 5

CWs: mention of ECT, mental hospital whump, mental health gaslighting, force used against patient (electric shock baton), forced psychiatric care

Matthew Cooper pulled up in front of a small house on the end of the street, pulling out his phone to send a quick text that read 'I'm here.'

On the screen were a series of previous, unanswered and unread messages he had sent to his friend Rowan.

'Hey Rowan. Just checking in.'

'Rowan, it's me. What's up bud?'

'Where are you?'

'PICK UP ROWAN'

'Fine. If you won't talk to me, I'm not going to try anymore'

Then, from today. 'Rowan, I'm coming over.'

Matt sighed as he dropped his phone into his pocket and clambered out of the car. He walked up to the front door, and rang the doorbell. He waited a moment, and when there was no answer, he rapped on the door with his knuckles. Still, nothing. The whole house seemed to be silent and still. He pressed his face to the one of the windows, attempting to peer through.

"Rowan!" He called.

No answer.

"Crap." Matt murmured. "Where the hell are you.."

He strode around the back of the house, searching for any signs of life from his friend. Finally, he spotted a back door, slightly ajar. It struck Mathew as strange. Rowan was not a careless person - in fact, quite the opposite, he could be rather paranoid, in Mathew's opinion. So it was completly out of the ordinary for his friend to leave a door unlocked, and Mathew also had no idea how long it had been open or if Rowan was even in the house still.

Cautiously, Matthew entered through the door, calling Rowan's name as he went. There were no traces of recent life - everything was put away neatly as Mathew would expect of Rowan, until he reached his friend's bedroom. This room was a mess - papers were scattered everywhere, on the bed, on the floor, on the desk.. Rowan's laptop was also still there, but Mathew wasn't keen to go trying to break into that. He pick up a paper sitting on the desk, and scanned through it. It was a newspaper article.

'Redwood Asylum patients claim gross mistreatment'.  The headline read. The article was dated 1964. The next article, from 1970, announced the closing-down of the Institute. The outdated facility had claimed around 1000 lives by the time of its closure, almost a hundred years since it opened.

All the other papers and articles were about the institute, why puzzled Mathew further. Why was Rowan so obssessed with this place? And more importantly, where was Rowan?

Mathew did a quick google of the place, finding that it had since been reopened and claimed to now be running as a more modern psychiatric hospital. Matthew was all out of options - his only remaining option was right in front of him. He hit the phone number listed on the web page, drew a deep breath, and hit the call button.

"Hello, you've reached Redwood Psychiatric Institute. You're speaking to Carol, how can I help you?"

"Uh, hi Carol, my name's Mathew Cooper. I was wondering if you recently had a visitor by the name of Rowan Murdock?"

"I'm sorry but we can't disclose information on our visitors. We have, however, got a patient by that name. There's a note on his file saying he can't have visitors, are you family?"

"Oh, uh.. no, I'm a long-time friend of his though. I was just wondering if I could get some more information on what happened." Mathew stammered, shocked at the news. Rowan was a patient?

"I can arrange for you to meet his doctor, in that case. Doctor Wilson. I'm sure he'd be willing to discuss Rowan's - well, yes. Rowan's recent weeks with us."

Mathew arranged a time for the meeting and then hung up the phone. He began to head out the room, when he turned back, picked up one of the articles on the psychiatric institute, and then continued on his way out of the house.

------

"Mathew Cooper, I'm here to talk to Doctor Wilson." Matthew announced to the woman at the front desk.

"Sign here, and then take this visitor pass, and it'll be the third door on your left." She smiled, a friendly but tired, 'I've been here all day and I'm just trying to be friendly to you but I could care less' kind of smile.

"Thanks." Mathew smiled back as he followed her instructions and then headed down the hall.

Inside the office, the doctor sat behind the desk, looking comfortable but composed.

"Hello Mathew, take a seat. My name is Doctor Wilson." The doctor smiled from behind his glasses.

Mathew sat in the chair across from the doctor, and extended his hand to the doctor, who took it and shook it firmly.

"Thank you for coming, Mathew."  Doctor Wilson greeted. "I understand these circumstances must be.. rather confusing, and I appreciate your willingness to discuss this in person."

"Thank you for meeting with me, Doctor Wilson. I understand you must be very busy." Mathew acknowledged.

"Indeed. Now, allow us to get right into it. Now, when did you last see your friend?" The doctor asked.

"Well, I must have seen him last a few weeks ago." Mathew answered.

"I see. Well, he came here as a voluntary self-admission on September 13th. He was incredibly unstable, and we immediately began his treatment. When we admitted him, we looked into his medical records and his personal records. Now, while I'm afraid I have some hard news to digest, there is no other way to say this - his name isn't Rowan Murdock. His real name is James Lawton."

"What- you mean, he's been lying to me this whole time about who he is?"

"No, not at all. James is a very mentally ill young man, not a pathological liar. We discovered symptoms of schizophrenia throughout the last few years of his life, but it was not yet diagnosed or treated. It has just since accumulated and worsened. He has been in dire need of treatment for years, but when he came to us, he was at the height of a schizophrenic breakdown, believing he was Rowan Murdock, a profilic journalist investigating the asylum before deciding to admit himself.  We've been treating him with medications and ECT. He has been doing better the last few weeks, however,  we are worried that a visit with you, an old friend of 'Rowan's may cause another setback." The doctor sighed.

"Oh..." Mathew's heart sank at the explanation. He couldn't comprehend the whole story, it was not anything he could have imagined. Of course, he had accepted there was some horrible series of events that had led to Rowan- or, James - being here, but not like this. "I.. I'll do anything you need, I'll say anything, I just- I need to see him, I need to talk to him."

"Alright, I'll arrange a visit." Doctor Wilson conceded. "But you mustn't encourage any of his delusions relating to 'Rowan Murdock'."

"Understood, Doctor. Thank you very much."

------

"James, I have a visitor for you." Doctor Wilson stood in the doorway, ushering Matt ahead of him.

Matt entered the room hesitantly, his eyes scanning around until they landed on a small figure, hunched up in white in the corner of the small room.

"James?"

The figure Matt had once known as Rowan did not acknowledge the presence of anyone in the room. He simply muttered something under his breath.

"James. I've brought you a visitor." Doctor Wilson repeated, mild annoyance already in his voice as he approached James and bent down, waving at his patient to try and gain his attention.

James blinked, several times, slow and sluggish, as if drawing himself out of a trance. He glanced around the room, eyes landing eventually on Mathew.

"Who.. whoareyouu-" James slurred softly, as Doctor Wilson grasped him by the arm and helped him onto his feet, bringing him over to the small bed in the centre of the room.

"He's on a lot of medication right now. He may be suffering some short-term memory loss right now, so remember that this will pass. Just remind him who you are." Doctor Wilson said to Mathew.

Mathew nodded and approached the bed, kneeling in front of his old friend. Rowa- James, he reminded himself, looked pale, and his usually-thin frame looked even thinner than usual, or maybe that was the ill-fitting hospital gown. The circles under his eyes were dark, and his face was pinched and gaunt.

"Hey, James. It's me, your old friend Mathew." He said softly, reaching out a hand.

James didn't take the hand, instead, he sat there, staring blankly at it as Matt continued talking.

"We've known each other since university. You used to come and 'study' at my house. I'd steal your notes, and then we'd play video games together until 3am, even if we had class the next morning at 9." Mathew chuckled slightly at the memory, his heart aching a little to see his friend of five years in this situation. They'd been very close through university, but in the last two years they'd drifted apart slightly as both adjusted to their adult lives. Still, he cared for his friend.

Matt drew himself out of his own thoughts and looked up to see James staring at him with an.. odd expression.

"James, are you alright?" Matthew asked gently.

"That's.. not my name." James said flatly.

Shit.. He'd triggered James. His friend began to cry - no, more like tears were slipping down from expressionless eyes.

James suddenly stood and lunged at Mathew, knocking him to the ground as he began to scream at Matt.

"HELP!"James screamed as he shook his friend. "THEY'RE TORTURING ME, LET ME OUT YOU HAVE TO LET ME OUTYOUHAVETOYOUHAVETOYOUHAVETO-"

Mathew was so shocked, he couldn't react. James screamed himself hoarse until suddenly, he gave a suprised shout, and collapsed onto his back, convulsing in agony at the hands of orderlies who had appeared in the room.

"Are you alright?" Doctor Wilson asked as he extended a hand and helped Mathew to his feet, pulling him away as the orderlies descended upon James' form, brandishing a syringe. Quickly, Doctor Wilson escorted Mathew out of the room, away from James' dreaful shrieking protests.

They returned to the doctor's office, where Wilson handed Mathew a glass of water. Matt graciously accepted it, ignoring the odd drop spilling out from how badly his hands shook. He downed the glass, wiped his face, and finally spoke. "What- what will happen now?"

"We will have to change his medication, and I'm going to perscribe another course of ECT." The doctor replied, calm but with a hint of frustration.

Mathew realised that clearly, James' treatment had been quite a difficult process that was now far from over.

"Shock therapy?" he asked.

"While that is the outdated term for it.. yes. It is now quite safe, and often used in quite severe cases of mental illness. Clearly, his schizophrenic hallucinations and paranoia are not yet treated. We will have to increase our efforts to stop these delusions that he is being trapped here."

"Will I be able to return and visit him again, Doctor?"

"Maybe after the next round of ECT. Thank you for coming, Mathew."

As Mathew drove away from the Redwood hospital, he wondered what fate he was leaving his friend to.

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@jazatronasmr @onthishamsterwheel @bumpthumpwhump @bloodsweatandpotato @whatiswhump @jancameforthewhump @dream-whump @ratking-whump @inkstainsonmyhands12 @halstead-shaw13 @sparrowsage @sowhumpful @whatwhumpcomments @caspersdelusion

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