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#public library commute
teathattast · 30 days
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flying into the unknown
been around it but never been here before
in a daydream, vertigo
i was drifting off to hear your morning soul
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arson1st · 1 year
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soundspotlights · 6 months
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Song: kauai | Artist: Public Library Commute
Spotify Link | Apple Music Link | SoundCloud Link
Spotlight: i wish i was in kauai, lying in a hammock, swaying with the breeze, looking out on the ocean, and listening to this song.
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ravenplaylist · 1 year
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December 10, 2022 - Brand New by Public Library Commute
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letmusicspeaks · 1 year
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moderntropical · 2 years
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petiolata · 7 months
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I thought about volunteering at my local library but not only do you have to provide your work history on the application but also two references. Then I guess if they like what they see the library HR department reaches out to you.
All that to do work for free??? 🤦‍♀️ Ridiculous. If I wanted to face that level of scrutiny and rejection I could just apply for actual paying jobs 😒 the animal shelter I volunteered at before didn't pull this shit.
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yloiseconeillants · 2 years
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i have got to quit this job and get out of this town, moving back to a small town was a MISTAKE and it’s been more than a year like i could find another job in portland again, even on a part-time basis would be better than just. this.
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jazzmasternot · 1 month
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Hazbin hotel college AU head cannons
Note: decided to write these out after reading @sprainedwriting’s fanfic about Adam being a frat boy and I took that concept and ran with it.
Obviously this is based off of my own university experience where I attend a really big public university in the southern US. so that’s where my takes are coming from.
This is also my first time writing anything on here so there’s that aswell.
Charlie
Majors in musical theatre, but not performance education. She wants to be the unhinged theatre teacher that everyone loves. Lives in one of those really fancy student apartment lofts with keke. And is part of the cat club where she feeds the cats on campus
Vaggie
She probably does something super hard like biomedical engineering (let’s go women in stem!) which takes up allot of her time already. Is also an RA for one of the dorms on campus which is good for her bc free housing and gets paid to do her homework at the front desk. Met Charlie in an English class and have been together ever since. When she’s not on call she’s spending the night at Charlie’s and Charlie’s almost always sitting at the front desk with vaggie even tho she doesn’t work or live at the dorm and no one says anything bc it’s just not that deep.
Alastor
Majors in audio engineering and runs the campus radio station that people definitely still listen too. He went to community college first then transferred to a four year (to save money ofc) and is a commuter where he still lives with his mom. Does work study where he works the front desk of the library where he does his homework and works on his scripts for his radio show. Has no interest in working with Vox since he runs the tv channel simply bc he doesn’t want all that extra work. Still takes his notes on pen and paper and still has a nightmare of a time figuring out to electronically submit all his assignments and take his tests.
Angel dust
Okay so hear me out he majors in math ikik it sounds crazy but every gay math major I’ve ever met acts just like Angel dust. Goes to raves and frat parties even tho the guys don’t want him there but he always brings girls with him so the kinda have to let him in. Does nude modeling for extra cash at the art school so he’s kinda a celeb over there even tho he’s not in anyway related to that major.
Husk
Majors in Restaurant and hotel management and is one of those college students that are in their late twenties so already has more life experience than most other ppl here so he doesn’t do allot of the stupid college that allot of other ppl do. Lives in some off campus apartment that’s just a large house rented out to students made to look like a apartment (yk the ones in talking abt) works at the dive bar located just off campus that everyone goes to atleast once in their four years.
Sir pentious
Majors in mechanical engineering or industrial design I can’t really decided. Definitely uses the 3D printer all the time and is on the robotics team, which wins every competition they go to.
Nifty
She’s changed her major so many times nobody knows anymore. Is part of the kpop club and has biases complete with intricately decorated covers, like she has so many photo cards. Also runs the campus hotties account where it’s just a bunch of candids of cute guys taken from far away. Will also get really pissed if you don’t wash your dishes bc it will attract bugs so if ur her roommate you better do the dam dishes.
Cherry bomb
Art major and is the one who got Angel the nude modeling gig. Is always pulling all nighters bc she kept postponing the assimgment till the last minute. Has probably vandalized a couple buildings surrounding the university but hasn’t been caught. Goes to raves and the aforementioned frat parties with Angel. Also has a traffic cone in her dorm room for no other reason than just bc.
Vox
Majors in multi media marketing, runs the campus tv and YouTube channel. Definitely the president of a frat that inflates his ego more than it already is. Always at sporting events at the front row with all the frat guys giving everyone the inside scoop and game commentary. Is very pissed that alastor won’t work with him. Treats himself like a campus celebrity even tho ppl could care less and are just trying to get their degree.
Valentino
majors in film and media productions yeah he’s one of those. Always asking if you’ve seen pulp fiction and telling you that you need to watch some random black and white movie that’s only in French. Will definitely invite you over to watch something with you but we all know that’s not the case. Also all his film projects has allot of unnecessary nudity and sex under the guise of artistic expression, even when it’s so not relevant to the plot. Unless it’s a film that he’s making for the university in which case Vox is controlling every aspect of it which in this case is a good thing. Smokes in his dorm room without a care in the world and has really loud inconsiderate sex at any random point in the 24 hour day cycle.
Velvette
Majors in public relations and runs the university’s Instagram account. She’s always walking up to ppl with a lil microphone to ask you to tell us what you’re wearing. Speaking off she always comes to class dressed up (like the international students) no leggings and tennis shoes for her. Also is definitely in a divine nine sorority, and runs their insta too.
Carmilla
She’s a professor for the aerospace engineering dept and shes here bc she got sick of making rockets for Lockheed Martin and reatheon. Hella smart and ppl are baffled that she chose to give up a seven figure job to teach a bunch of college kids but she’s so chill abt it tho.
Zestial
Definitely English lit professor, makes you read the books no one’s heard of and not the classics. Always brings his own open regular coffee mug from his house to sip his tea from instead of a thermos, everyone asks how he doesn’t spill it on his ride to work. Also just straight up has an electric kettle in his office so he can have tea whenever he wants. Takes turns with carmilla eating lunch in each other’s offices.
Rosie
Studies agriculture sciences and food processing. Will probably run a slaughter house when she’s done with her degree. Hangs out with Alastor in his radio booth from time to time just to gossip about whatever drama is going around lately. Wears long skirts and a tote bag all the time. Is always sweet to Charlie and Emily, also loathes Vox just as much as Alastor she just finds him annoying.
Lucifer
Is probably a religion professor that’s not religious at all and is super laid back in his class like one easy discussion board post a week. The kinda guy to be like “it’s so nice out let’s have class outside today guys” or “if I make this shot ur all getting extra credit on the quiz this week”.
Adam
Definitely majors in finance and is a frat boy. And his band plays at all the said frat parties. Is very insufferable to talk to at parties will try tell you how crypto is the currency of the future and how wolf of Wall Street is his favorite movie. Has a Saturdays are for the boys flag in his room and navy blue sheets. Oh did I mention he vapes he definitely vapes those Mike Tyson ones that taste awful and look like bricks yeah those. Always gets drunk at the tailgate way before the game is even started.
Lute
Yeah she’s in premed and wants everyone to know she’s better than you bc of it. Everyone else’s major is easy compared to hers so don’t you dare complain about all your assignments in her vicinity. She’s basically made it her whole identity like she’s in the premed honors society, future doctors of America. Types her notes on her laptop and then rewrites them with all her gel pens and fancy highlighters, like thee be so colorfull and pretty then the title would be something like blood clots. Still friends with Adam bc they went to the same highschool together and always helping him with his homework in turn he gets her into the tailgate tents and frat parties so she always gets free alcohol.
Emily
Majors in Elementary education and looks like it too, with the Stanley cup, James Avery charm bracelet, and all. She also takes super pretty notes but she does them in class which is super power all in itself, like her desk is scattered with gel pens and highlighters of every color and swears by her bullet journal. She also feeds the cats on campus with Charlie and runs the arts and crafts club on campus where they always host events like tote bag painting in the grass area of the university. Also doesn’t drink bc she’s not twenty one yet even tho she’s in college and definitely won’t smoke even tho most of the ppl that show up to her events are total potheads
Sera
She’s like the university president who doesn’t actually GAF abt the students and just fund’s athletics and raises tuition every year under miscellaneous fees. She tries to come off as supportive when she’s out in public but no one’s buying it.
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teathattast · 1 month
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and if you could read my mind
will you make your way towards mine?
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just-rogi · 1 year
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“I DO NOT DREAM OF LABOR” this “LATE STAGE CAPITALIST BRAINROT” that- well I do. I do dream of labor. Idleness makes my hands buzz and my eyes glaze over. Of course I enjoy rest (what little of it I get with my job) but ultimately, yes, I do dream of labor. Labor is what I dream of most in fact-
I dream of creating : of having time to knit and sew and embroider my own garments, rather than let my yarn collect dust in my closet. I dream of creating poetry and art and spending hours illustrating something beautiful and having the time and energy to focus only on that.
I dream of biking the back roads of my town with my brother again collecting litter that we see and filling up plastic bags to sort into recycling and trash (two summers ago was the last time we biked together- the litter is building up now in the ditches).
I dream of tilling the soil in my mothers garden and watering the tomatoes and peppers and zucchini and Persian squash in the garden until I can harvest it. I dream of watering my neighbors garden and feeding her chickens every morning and every evening while they are away on vacation for a week. I dream of driving to my grandmothers house twice a week and bringing her fresh fruit bread and vegetables and cooking for her while she sits in the sun eating tomato salad I made.
I dream of mowing my mothers lawn and making my brother lunch and baking treats for the teachers room at work.
I dream of academia and dedicating hours to research to archaeology and anthropology and spending long hours on dig sites and in the lab as that was when I was the happiest in college.
I am one of the few people who can say that I really, truly, from the bottom of my heart, love my job and come home from work feeling a sense of fulfillment and pride in my work. I am a teacher and I dream of spending hours teaching children to read, teaching ancient civ and history, of reading texts on effecting teaching methods and finding interesting assignments for them. I dream of teaching them to draw during their free periods. I dream of taking them to the library to practice reading and language comprehension skills- of taking the time to sit with middle schoolers with learning disabilities and dedicate my time and energy to teaching them how to be functional adults and making their lives better. I dream of labor, yes, and I would bet that most of the tiktok communists who say “I do not dream of labor” fucking do to.
Labor is fulfilling. Humans dream to create and do something worthwhile- otherwise we lose our minds! But we are at such a late stage capitalism here in the west (specifically America) that we associate labor with exploitative labor.
I love my job- but I do not dream of skipping my lunch break. I do not dream of working 8:45-4:00. I do not dream of staying after work until 4:35 unpaid. I do not dream of small classrooms with little supplies. I do not dream of understaffed schools and overstuffed classrooms forcing teachers to stretch themselves too to pick up the slack. I do not dream of sending emails after working hours. I do not dream of forty minute unpaid commute due to dysfunctional public transport. I do not dream of coming home and crying from stress every night. I do not dream of my feet and ankles swelling and hurting so badly after a full day of work that all I can do when I get home is shower and sleep with my feet elevated to lessen the pain enough to slip my shoes on the next day. I do not dream of the pay being such that I have to live with four roomates in the city I live in, AS A CITY EMPLOYEE!!! IM A FUCKING PUBLIC SERVANT!! I WORK FOR THE CITY BUT DONT GET PAID ENOUGH TO LIVE IN THE CITY!!
I do dream of labor fuck I love labor but exploitation has made me resent work which I should love, and has taken up so much of my time that I have no energy to garden or to clean the roads or to knit gifts for friends and family anymore. I know that there are people who dream of being truck drivers and baristas and grocery store employees. I know that there are people who would feel fulfilled by being garbage men and construction workers and dishwashers, but who can’t because the abuse would kill them and the hours are too long.
I dream of labor I’m a world where I am not abused and where all my basic needs are met - I dream of labor in a world where labor isn’t the price of being alive, but rather one of the many joys of it.
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sunscreenstudies · 6 months
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Simple Tips to Read More
1. Set a Reading Goal: Challenge yourself to read a certain number of pages or books each week. Having a goal keeps you motivated.
2. Prioritize Reading Time: Dedicate a specific time for reading each day. It could be in the morning, during breaks, or before bed.
3. Carry a Book Everywhere: Keep a book or e-reader with you at all times. You'd be surprised how many pages you can sneak in during idle moments.
4. Create a Reading Nook: Design a cozy reading nook with comfy chairs, good lighting, and a side table for your books and a cup of tea.
5. Make a Reading List: Create a list of books you want to read. It's like having a reading roadmap.
6. Join a Book Club: Engaging in discussions with fellow readers can inspire you to read more and discover new genres.
7. Limit Screen Time: Reduce the time spent on screens, especially social media and streaming services, to make room for reading.
8. Read What You Love: Don't force yourself to read something you're not interested in. Choose books that genuinely intrigue you.
9. Audiobooks and Podcasts: If you have a busy schedule, listen to audiobooks or book-related podcasts while commuting or doing chores.
10. Set Realistic Expectations: Life can get busy. It's okay if you can't read a book a week. Read at your own pace.
11. Combine Activities: Combine hobbies with reading. For example, listen to a book while working out or cooking.
12. Public Libraries: Make use of your local library. It's a treasure trove of free books and resources.
13. Breaks for Books: Instead of scrolling through your phone during breaks, pick up a book.
14. Reread Favorites: Reread books you love. It's like visiting an old friend.
15. Track Your Progress: Keep a reading journal to record your thoughts and track your reading progress.
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afeelgoodblog · 2 years
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The Best News of Last week
Hi, this is Erica. Let's start the week with some good news from around the world
📖 A new bill will provide millions of children in CA with free books thanks to Dolly Parton
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A new bill signed into law will now provide millions of children in California with free books thanks to Dolly Parton.
The bill, SB 1183, was signed into law by Gov. Gavin Newsom and will provide funding for Parton’s “Imagination Library” program, providing free books to children from birth to 5 years old.
Aiming to encourage preschool children to develop an early love of reading and learning, the bill received bipartisan support in both houses.
🦁 Pride of lions airlifted from Ukraine to Colorado in “biggest-ever warzone rescue of lions”
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A pride of lions that were living at the Bio Park Zoo in Odessa, a southern city in Ukraine that has been impacted by the Russian-Ukraine war, has been airlifted to the Wild Animal Sanctuary in Colorado, according to a news release.
“The big cats were urgently relocated when the war first broke by a convoy that journeyed over 600 miles across Ukraine and Moldova, arriving in Targu Mures, Romania, on May 24, 2022. The Targu Mures Zoo provided a temporary home for the animals for several months so that an emergency travel permit could be approved for the eleven lions to board an international rescue flight,” the release said.
🐶 Hundreds of Dogs Saved From Nevada Breeding Farm in Huge Police Operation
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Authorities have seized around 300 dogs from a property in Nevada in what officials have described as a “large-scale” animal cruelty situation. Detectives from Nye County Sheriff’s Office (NCSO) obtained a search warrant for a property in Amargosa Valley following an investigation and visited the location on Tuesday.
There, officials arrested a couple — Oskana Higgins and Vasili Platunov — on felony animal abuse and neglect charges, the NCSO said.
✍️ This 33-year-old made more than 1,000 Wikipedia bios for unknown women scientists
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Jessica Wade began writing Wikipedia biographies about women and minority scientists who never got their due — from employers, from other scientists, from the public. Wade has written more than 1,600 Wikipedia entries for long-ignored women scientists, and she has firm beliefs on ideas on how to support girls interested in the field.
She won awards and medals and was cited by Jimmy Wales, the founder of Wikipedia.
🐦 When you next hear cheerful twittering of birds, you should stop and listen: new study suggests that listening to birdsong reduces anxiety and paranoia
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Birdsongs alleviate anxiety and paranoia in healthy participants.
Fun fact: Did you know that they play bird songs at Tokyo subway stations to stop people getting stressed out on their morning commute?
☄️ Nasa’s Dart spacecraft ‘changed path of asteroid’
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Scientists have now confirmed the orbit of a 160m-wide (520ft) space rock known as Dimorphos was altered when the Dart probe struck it head on last month. Researchers came to the conclusion after making measurements using a range of space and Earth-based telescopes.
The mission was conceived to test a potential strategy to defend the Earth against threatening objects.
🤖 Tiny Robots Have Successfully Cleared Pneumonia From The Lungs of Mice
Scientists have been able to direct a swarm of microscopic swimming robots to clear out pneumonia microbes in the lungs of mice, raising hopes that a similar treatment could be developed to treat deadly bacterial pneumonia in humans. The technology is still at a proof-of-concept stage, but the early signs are very promising.
“Based on this mouse data, we see that the microrobots could potentially improve antibiotic penetration to kill bacterial pathogens and save more patients’ lives,” says Victor Nizet, a physician and professor of pediatrics at the University of California, San Diego.
That’s it for this week. This newsletter will always be free. If you liked this post you can support me with a small kofi donation:
Buy me a coffee ❤️
Have a great week ahead.
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judassmyvirtue · 3 months
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Hey folks, just dropping some resources here for those of you who, like me, are always on the hunt for free reading material, whether it's for research or just to satisfy your curiosity. If you're always looking to expand your reading list without breaking the bank, check these out: Library of Congress: Absolute goldmine for academic researches and historical documents. You can spend hours diving into their collections.
Z-library: A treasure trove of books, articles, and papers on pretty much any topic you can think of. Quick downloads, no fuss.
Project Gutenberg: Free e-books galore, especially if you're into classics. Saved me from many a boring commute.
Internet Archive: A digital library offering free universal access to books, movies, and music, plus archived web pages. Endless hours of browsing joy.
Google Books: Sometimes you just need a quick peek inside a book without committing to buying it. Google Books has got your back.
Google Scholar: It scours through scholarly sources, journals, theses, and more. Just be ready to sift through some dense material.
JSTOR: Another heavyweight in the academic world. JSTOR is packed with scholarly articles, books, and primary sources across various disciplines. Some stuff may be behind a paywall, but there's still plenty to explore for free.
Newspaper Archive: Want to browse through historical newspapers? This site has a massive collection spanning centuries and covering a wide range of topics. Perfect for digging up primary sources.
Newspapers.com: Need more historical newspapers? Look no further.
Perseus Digital Library: Focuses on ancient Greco-Roman materials, perfect for those deep dives into classical history.
Digital Public Library of America: Another treasure trove of digitized materials, including photos, manuscripts, and more.
Europeana: European cultural heritage online. Images, texts, the whole shebang.
DOAJ: Open access journals. DOAJ indexes and provides access to high-quality, peer-reviewed open access research journals.
Open Library: Another digital library offering over 1.7 million free eBooks.
Librivox: Audiobooks for when your eyes need a break.
National Archives (UK): Offers access to a wealth of historical documents, including government records, maps, photographs, and more.
Sci-Hub: For the rebels. Access to scholarly articles.
Directory of Open Access Books (DOAB): Looking for free scholarly books? DOAB has got you covered with a vast collection.
Digital Commons Network: Free, full-text scholarly articles from hundreds of universities and colleges worldwide.
Directory of Open Access Repositories (OpenDOAR): Find open access repositories worldwide.
Gallica (Bibliothèque nationale de France): French flair for your research.
DigitalNZ: Your gateway to New Zealand's digital heritage.
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Note
WIbta if I don't read an author's books for their opinion on book piracy?
Context: I live in a country where literary has plummeted, reading is a hobby for the privileged, bookstores are closing or dilapidated, libraries are worse off.
Bookstores here are not good at keeping up with new releases. Their bestsellers are local publishes, and things like Percy Jackson or the Hardy boys. Requesting them to bring books almost never works.
With libraries, schools and colleges have their private ones only open to students and staff but they're... Restrictive about what someone can check out. Librarians here totally pro-censorship. Public libraries are less than 10 in my metro city, they keep old books, academic texts, and in some cases specialize in one area. That includes one of the biggest libraries in the country. And it's like 6 hours to commute so that's not a sustainable option for me. Of course library apps straight up don't exist here.
We have a couple book box subscription services. One sends those bestsellers that everyone's read as kids. The other one is expensive and more of a privileged influencer orientated thing than for readers.
What I said so far might sound too bad to be true but it is the reality. Physical books have been getting expensive worldwide. On top of that if I can't be caught reading things our government doesn't like. I read a lot of classics, for which I use a legal free site. But for something like a queer fantasy book written by a foreigner my only options are buying on kindle or well.. downloading them. Kindle doesn't always have the books I want, but the download sites tend to bring in requested books.
So of course there's ethical dilemma. With my salary I can save up and buy 6-7 books a year, I only buy the ones I've read and thoroughly enjoyed, enough to want them on my shelf or because I want to support the author, even with the risk of kindle copies being taken away at an exec's whim in the future.
I found out a couple authors I really wanted to read from are anti-piracy, one of them put a message like "Whoever pirates this book I put a curse on you" in their ya fantasy book. And I don't read a lot of ya but that book sounded interesting, until I saw that. These author's tone while talking about readers in my kind of position put me off and I decided not to read their works.
My logic is that I'd rather download and see if I love a book before buying, if I love it I wouldn't want to support people like them and feel bad reading it too, if I buy first and hate it then it's a waste of my money while the authors get a few cents off that purchase.
So naturally I've been told to suck it up, read less, stop reading if I can't afford, stick to free classics and fanfics, make more money, bring revolution in my country etc.
I do feel bad about the authors, even though most of what I read are from dead people there's a good amount of living people too and not all of them are getting their coins whether I want to give it to them or not. And the reason for this ask: Someone said I'm overreacting to those authors, I should just read those books like a normal person and move on instead of viewing them as books not to be touched.
So?
What are these acronyms?
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natreads · 15 days
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Ramblings about uni and the future
I'm trying to make a difficult decision. Since I've spent the last five years trying to break into the publishing industry and mostly failing (I'm freelance but can't get a full time job), I've been thinking very seriously about going back to uni to become a librarian instead. It's not really a career I've ever thought of, or wanted, but the same can be said for publishing. I decided I wanted to go that route when I already had a my bachelors degree. It felt like the "right" path, but I wasn't aware of how difficult it would be. The industry is so closed off, and I'm not very good at putting myself out there, so I've been struggling a lot. Not to mention people keep getting fired left and right so even if I do get in who knows how long that will last. I guess part of deciding to study something else, despite already having a masters degree and over six years of uni studies behind me, is that I feel like I need to essentially give up this dream, which would make the past five years feel like a waste even though I don't necessarily think they are. But I will have to give up the identity I have built around the industry. But I also feel like going another route won't mean I can't one day make it there too. But I also don't want to get another degree just to still be focusing on an industry that's this unattainable. I will have to focus on making it as a librarian instead and the idea of having to properly give up publishing makes me so sad, but I also know it will bring me relief once I actually do it. I need to study something where I will actually find work.
Another issue is that I really really REALLY don't want to study for another three years lmao. I talked to some people and there's a possibility that I COULD skip one semester due to previous studies, but I feel like it will be complicated and also not necessarily set in stone to manipulate the degree like that. I also got the tip to go take a masters instead which is two years, but here are the pros and cons to all of this:
Three year undergrad:
The school I did my BA at, so it's familiar
Since it's undergrad I'm not worried I will fail
Close to home (even if I move)
Unfortunately it's three years
It feels "silly" to get another BA when I could get an MA immediately instead
Two year masters program:
It's only two years
It will probably be hard
Could be done online, but I don't know if I have it in me to sit at home for two years again
It's in another city, but only takes an hour by train to get there
Unfortunately the train (pendeln) SUCKS and is super unreliable
And I would have to pay a bunch each time
But I like the idea of experiencing something new, since I both like the city (it's a college town) and don't think one hour is that bad
Another problem is that we'll be doing lots of group work so I might have to be there a lot which will be annoying
If I knew just HOW often I'd have to go I feel like it would be easier
I'm gonna be moving soonish to an apartment in the city here in Stockholm so I don't wanna move to Uppsala and do student housing, but my lease will only be one year so maybe I COULD during second year. I've never expeirenced student life like that before
Do I really wanna write another fucking masters thesis omg
I like the sound of two master degrees tho lmao
One semester will be dedicated to writing my thesis so I will mostly only have to commute for 1.5 years I guess, which makes the student housing in year two maybe unnessecary? But my lease will be up anyway soooo. In an ideal world I would be doing student housing my first year and then move into the other apartment after, but I can't do that and I don't wanna give up on a great opportunity
We'll be visiting libraries and whatnot and if it's in Uppsala (I kinda assume it is) I will have to figure out the public transit looool
Essentially, I think the undergrad one is safe but longer, while the MA is shorter but scarier. If I do the MA online I will be more comfortable, but also probably lowkey go crazy. Maybe if I knew if and how much I would be working at the bookstore after the summer I would pick the online version, since work would get me out of the house, but none of us know how needed I will be.
I know I need to change lanes, since I'm getting older and I need stability. Working in a library is the next best thing I can see myself doing after publishing (I kinda wanted to do marketing but I've realized it unfortunately goes against a lot of my morals and libraries are ethically the one and only place I stand 100% behind).
Idk if anyone has any insight or advice please lmk I'm so torn
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