#purely a personality thing not an age or maturity thing
I'm becoming a legal adult this summer, got any tips?
How to Adult, a summary by me. Not everything is in here but if I'd known this stuff at Legal Age instead of Calculus, I'd be a vastly happier person.
Learn about taxes, learn about Credit, never go into debt for anything that isn't a major appliance, car or house, no not for a commitment ring especially- moissanite is star-stuff and sparklier than diamonds anyway. Check your bank balance often, especially to make sure your automatic car payments go through.
Read "the Five Love Languages" and related books. Super duper helpful for communicating in any context, not just romantic love. THis'll help you keep jobs, mend relationships, be a better friend, and so on.
Never EVER take on a roommate/datemate because you feel sorry for them/want to help. TRUST ME. DO NOT.
Learn about clear communication with "I Statements", read up on Consent, learn about Boundaries, learn about codependence, and learn Dating/friendship Red Flags such as Manipulation, isolation, ultimatums, negging, and so on,
and until you're like 23 do not date anyone more than two years older than you, (no really, trust me they don't find you Mature/not like the Others, they find you vulnerable and they were looking for it, do not fall for it. You're fresh, young, and vulnerable, we all are at that age, and creeps hunt for young things to prey on. Just date near your age for a while.)
Unlearn your ableism, unlearn your racism, don't try to be too Woke, don't chase people who aren't pure enough with torches and pitchforks, watch out for white supremacists, and you'll be amazed what has roots in white supremacy. Take plenty of time off instagram/social media, it's fictional. Filters and lights, smoke and mirrors.
Antivaxxing is all about hating autistic people for something that isn't true- don't fall for it, or oils, or crystals. Use a certain amount of common sense re: modern medicine FFS. Lavender for peaceful rest, salve for a little infection, antibiotics for a bad infection, vaccines for not being stricken by the long term effects of horrible diseases. I don't care what your pastor says, they're not an MD and they do not know how vaccines are made. I guarantee anything they do know is outdated.
Thinking critically doesn't mean being "liberal" it means thinking critically- of all of it. Even the stuff you want to be true. Right, left, and center. Pay attention to what you KNOW... and what you're just repeating..
ALWAYS wear eye and lung protection for sprays and power tools. You have ONE pair of lungs and damage there can be cumulative. Be that annoying person who insists on safety, you'll save lives. Always wear a helmet if a helmet is suggested, never get on a motorbike with anyone not in leathers and a helmet, never ride in a car or vehicle without seatbelts.
NEVER drink and drive, for any reason. Uber exists now, or freaking walk to a hotel. Never drive too tired. Never drive with your phone in your hand. Other people want to live too. A drink every night or frequent bingeing can be functioning alcoholism. Don't be afraid to talk about it with a doctor. Weight =/= Health =/= moral superiority, make it into a wall poster if you have to. Your body doesn't have to be beautiful or even Healthy or Able to have worth, it is worthwhile because it contains YOU- I just happen to think all humans are pretty darn gorgeous, but it's not a qualifier for worth.
Weed can give you severe psychoses/mental health issues you didn't know you had latent, and make your existing mental illnesses worse, try a real doc and actual medication first. Keep your vaccines up to date. Always STD test regularly, and wear/use whatever protection. Doctors work for YOU. If one will not listen, especially if you're not a cis male, WALK OUT. (or crutch or roll. You know, as you do)
All that said, try lots of different jobs or activities responsibly, take that basketweaving class, try photography, rent a sewing machine from your library, buy that supersoaker you wanted as a kid and couldn't have, take that job shoveling poo to be allowed to ride the horses around the stableyard, work for a season on a tall ship, find out what Experimental Archaeology means, go learn to swordfight with a HEMA club...
have fun, be kind as you can, to as many people as you can, as much as you can, Yes even the ones who aren't as woke as you, are too religious for your taste, or have backwards ideas, or drive you nuts. Be Kind.
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How old is your sis?
older than me
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saccahrine sundays | k.bakugou
♡ pairing: katsuki bakugou x fem!reader.
♡ word count: 5.3K
♡ rating: mature, 18+, mdni.
♡ genre: pro hero!au, married!au, fluff + smut.
♡ summary: katsuki can never find enough time to get some sleep. between being a full time pro hero, a father and a husband— hours of rest are hard to come by. unless it’s one of those sweet, sweet saccharine sundays.
♡ warning(s): please read ! heavy smut, pwp ( characters aged up to late twenties ), somnophilia, unprotected sex ( wrap it before you tap it, kids ), fingering ( female recieving ), tummy bulges, mating press, pregnancy!kink, daddy!kink, breeding!kink, light!exhibitionism, cumplay + needy bakugou has a praise!kink... <3
♡ author’s note(s): brrr hey guys! it feels like forever since i last posted a full fic, january was bleh so im happy to get this out !! special thanks to @greenchild for feeding me this idea and thank to all of you for your love, support and 2.8K. i love you all, enjoy <3
♡ masterlist | requests
katsuki bakugou couldn’t remember the last time he’d gotten a full nights sleep. between being a pro hero and family life, the full eight to nine hours of pure rest wasn’t easy to come by— now he wasn’t complaining, he was far too grateful for the life he lead to whinge and whine about the finer details. bakugou was right on track to becoming the number two, he had a beautiful wife who loved him and supported him no matter how reckless he might have been and two little brats that he adored more than anything. he was miles ahead of his high school classmates, never letting up or resting so like he said, there was no room to complain.
but even as the faintest wisps of light slip through drawn curtains and a vermillion gaze settled on the old all might digital alarm clock ( reading 9:01 AM ), katsuki bakugou can’t help but feel grateful for the sleep he just had. no interruptions from wailing toddlers or infants who need changing, no late night call ins for patrols— none of that, just an arm around his wife’s waist and the soft sound of her breathing to coax him out of his sleepy state.
bakugou remembers now, a distant yet far from faint memory of where he and his wife spent two days of their honeymoon under slumber’s spell, having ravished each other the very night they arrived in paris for their honeymoon ( all mina’s idea, she had told katsuki it was the perfect destination for newly weds in love— and whilst the several districts his alien friend recommended did appease you, the blonde had promised to take you on a more luxurious getaway when he was hire up in the hero rankings ). of course that very honeymoon lead you to fall pregnant with your first little miracle— taiga bakugou, the very spitting image of her father except or the slight tilt to her nose and the sparkle in her eye that only her mother possessed.
raising her had proven to be both an enjoyable and exhausting experience for katsuki, with a matching explosive personality to rival even her daddy’s— there were many restless nights the pro hero spent butting heads with his daughter while his sweet spouse was away on missions and getting used to the field again. even during the pregnancy, full nights of rest were little to none— the cravings taiga gave you were almost unbearable for the blonde, not to mention the 2AM labour his little girl put you through...and yet he would repeat the last four years of lack of sleep all over again if it meant reliving every single moment with you. raising tatsumo was much better; however.
so as the weight of well deserved slumber lifts from katsuki’s shoulder’s he’s forced to deal with the memories of your sweet cries from the night (or rather, nights) he made you his wife. he stirs under cotton sheets, a familiar hardness pressing against his inner thigh as he recalls the way you tightened around him— “honey baby,” the desperate whisper tastes foreign, bitter across his tastebuds as he licks his lips. katsuki was usually much more composed when it came to sex, he could hold out for hours while you pleaded and begged of him to give you more. but this morning was different, very much so.
skilfully, the ash blonde slips a hand between your sheets, finger tips calloused with years of training and battle, dancing up your bare thighs from where you wear only his shirt and a pair of panties. the fingers trail up to your underwear, pressing them against your cunt as bakugou watches your face for any reaction— you twitch once before falling back into a deep slumber, letting your husband know that he can continue. he peels like orange silk away from your core and down your legs, half resisting the urge to sniff your undergarment like the dirty man he is but he decides that he can longer wait, already turned on by the feeling of your bare pussy against his hand.
the pro knows exactly how to turn you on, dragging is nails down your thighs just an inch from your wetness and his mind fogs with lust at the thought of the sounds you’d make for him if you were awake...not yet, he says to himself. his next move is to fuck your mouth, two of his digits sliding past parted lips from where you snore— gathering the drool that pools on the surface of your tongue. back and forth; move bakugou’s fingers until he’s satisfied with how wet you’ve made them with your spit. returning those very same fingers to your cunt, he parts your folds— already slightly sticky and hot with the nectar he’s used to savouring. if this were any other time, bakugou would be eating you out like a man starved of his last three meals but the rising sun tells him that his moments to fuck you are very few.
so now, he slides those lubed up fingers right into your tight little hole, shuddering under the sheets at how you automatically clamp around him— even while you sleep. katsuki’s vermillion eyes seek out your face in the warm light of the dusk, watching as your expression contorts into that familiar look of pleasure— lips blossoming into a cherry pout, brows furrowed as if you’re focusing on the way your husband makes you feel.
“fuck, honey baby, so good ‘n pliant for me even when yur fuckin’ sleepin’,” katsuki slurs against saliva that slips along his tongue, he’s hungry to fuck you, make you moan and scissors his fingers deep inside your obedient cunt in away that makes your slumbering body jump. pressing a thumb to your neglected clit, bakugou twists his fingers in search for your g-spot, pumping them into you with vigour. “gonna make you cum angel, baby, please cum while you’re like this s’you can take my cock.”
if there’s one thing pro hero dynamite knows, it’s that your body is a slave to him, no matter what state it’s in. your thighs part instinctively; giving your husband room to curl his fingers and press down hard on your pleasure spot— gummy walls sucking him in deeper. he makes you cum while you sleep, juices staining your supple skin, honeyed from the warm light outside.
“atta girl, cummin’ for your husband like that even when you’re sleeping— so fuckin’ naughty...” katsuki grunts, locks of sun kissed hair beginning to plaster itself against his forehead. his body shakes with the desire to be inside of you, his internal temperature rising with every second that he’s not sheathed within your walls. pulling his fingers away from your twitching mound, bakugou slides them, cum soaked and all, into his mouth to taste your very sweetness. “would eatcha out like a starved man, honeybee, but we don’t gotta lot of time left baby...”
with that, bakugou shuffles his sweats down enough for his cock to spring free, tip bright red and leaking against his toned, scarred abdomen. with practised ease, he hooks your right leg over his waist and positions your dripping cunny right over the head of his length. it takes everything katsuki has not to plunge deep inside of you, to abuse your tempting cunt until it’s formed into the shape of his cock but for once he wants to take you slowly, enjoy his time with your limp body at his disposal.
pressing his girth against your slick entrance, your husband sighs, coating himself with the remainders of your delightful release. the mess you made just for him, makes it easier for him to guide his cock between your velveteen folds that take him so well. his free hand comes up to brush over your cheek and even in the depths of your rest you manage to nuzzle into katsuki’s palm and make his coo— what a precious little doll you are, so good for him and always so obedient no matter what state you’re in. fuck, it drives him so insane that he can’t even think straight.
fucking hell. the way you sigh out for him so mawkishly whilst you dream makes him twitch, not even half the way inside you. “c’mon honey baby, don’t go moanin’ my name like that when i haven’t even had a c-chance to make you mine yet—“ the blonde shudders, eyes screwing shut as he finally bottoms out inside of you. katsuki let’s out a choked moan, from deep within his chest while you welcome him into your lethally syrupy cunt. “ohh, fuck, that’s the stuff, good girl...”
bakugou’s thrusts start slow yet, forcing your limp body to jolt up the bed and your tits to bounce in tune with the rhythm of his hips— your little hole sucks him in so greedily, so selfishly, clamping down on him as if to prevent him from leaving your body as a whole. pro hero dynamite is shaken to his core, how can his precious baby take him so darlingly while she’s asleep, refusing to let go of him and keep his cock tucked away inside of you.
shit, shit, shit.
he wants to defile you, asleep or not, ruin how pure and angelic your body appears even after years of being together. it’s your fault he’s like this anyway, you deserve to have your pussy destroyed no matter the circumstances— ruby framed eyes threaten to roll back into his skull while bakugou picks up the swirl of his hips between your sticky thighs, you flutter and squeeze around the girth that’s stretched you out so many times before and yet you still remain a tight hole designed for your husband and your husband alone.
lips map their way up the column of your neck, committing every dip and scar and blemish to memory even though katsuki knows where each of them are. the amber colour of the morning sun highlights each of your marks, your husband giving you as many lovebites to match each one. “nn, suki...more..” you whimper, so quiet he almost misses it underneath the sound of wet skin slapping against wet skin. could you feel how he deflowered you in your sleep? ruining such a good girl while you resting? he wants so bad to corrupt you from the inside.
static stretches across katsuki’s brain, crackling as his neurones fire and dopamine fizzes in his veins. cum. cum. breed her. it’s too soon but the blonde can’t help it, pent up and high on the morning sunrise— addicted to the taste of your skin licked with light perspiration. it’s been ages since he’s had you like this, can you blame him for not hanging on so long? bakugou lifts your thigh higher on his waist, using it as leverage to plough into the deepest parts of you, his precious wife, desperate to cream inside you before wake up.
“mm, know you’re close lovebug, won’t you cum for me suki?”
katsuki’s gaze hones in on you, vision blurred and hazy with lust from his impending orgasm. your own eyes are heavy with sleep but the soft smile on your face is filled with a familiar adoration and saccharine love that the blonde can never get tired of. he knows that you know your voice alone is another to send him speeding off of the cliff of release— your hole squeezing around him, beautiful hips that once brought his children into the world gracefully moving up and down to coax his girthy cock to its final release.
“honey baby,” katsuki whines like a broken man when you cup his face, hot puffs of air warming up the space between you. his hips don’t let up though, driven by the way you move against him beneath the sheets, he’s so close he can almost taste it. “c-couldn’t wait for you to wake up, needed you so fuckin’ bad...”
your mouth hangs open in a quiet groan, getting lost in the claps of sweaty bodies against one another and katsuki latches onto your lower lips to swallow your noise— breathing it in and letting it spread through his body like oxygen. “oh, lovebug, y-you don’t...” you pause, eyes rolling to the back of your head as the angry tip of your husband’s cock grazes against your gummy spot, sending your walls into a flurry of flutters that make katsuki twitch. “ ...you don’t ever have to wait with me, d-don’t hold back, kay?”
you’re a breathless mess, a sight to behold and he can’t take not having you filled with his seed any longer. the lazy push and pull of your bodies smacking wetly against each other become erratic thrusts, heat pooling in the abdomen of the pro hero boiling him alive in feelings of desire for you and you alone.
bakugou quivers from his lips to his toes when he cums, filling your slippery walls with a creamy white and lining your insides with the claim of your man. your man. your husband. “fuck, fucking hell, h-honey, gimme that pussy...gimmie that fuckin’ pussy,” his groans linger in the crisp early morning air, dancing with the static while he orgasms within you, endless bouts of white stuffing you to the brim. you kiss in an attempt to calm him, squeezing around his thick cock to ride out his high. you taste of orange liquor and manuka honey, addicting while he sucks lavishly on your tongue and spares you the air you need to breathe. ‘cause at the end of the day call you need is him.
“did you cum, precious one?” ever the gentleman, katsuki has to ask but even you can see in his blood red ruby eyes ( no matter how tired they may seem ) that he’s gearing up for a second round, shallow thrusts pushing his own release deeper into your fertile womb. there’s about thirty minutes until the kids wake up, but your lover can make you see stars in fifteen.
you shake your head once as bakugou rolls you onto your back— strong arms caging you into the prison if his love. large hands dance tenderly up the back of your thighs and you meet his eyes with such a saccharine smile his heart bursts at the sight of you. “you’re insatiable, lovebug,” the tingling notes of your moan caresses bakugou’s cheek as he manoeuvres your legs to fold you into a mating press, shifting his weight above you. “did you really need me that much, daddy bear?”
“think y’already know the answer to that, honeybee,” katsuki drawls, tripping over his words filled, oh so generously with blazing desire. he still remains sheathed inside you, a darling whine dripping from his cherry lined lips— the ones sore from kissing you— as he gives an experimental thrust into the tight heat of your core. you accept him willingly, opening up for him like a blossoming flower which makes katsuki’s hot breath stutter from the overstimulation. neither of you can look away, sharing the intimate moment of his length sinking into you— katsuki groans as you suck him in inch by inch before leaning over and attaching his lips to yours, licking at the seam of them in order to coax them open. his wife is a tease however; denying him the pleasure of sucking on her tongue...for now at least.
but it’s all worth it, for katsuki wants to burn the erotic sight of you beneath him into his mind forever. your skin shines like it was kissed by the setting moon, eyes hooded and holding a lust that only burns brightly for him while your chest heaves in anticipation of your husband claiming you for the second time that morning. “m-move suki, please—c-can’t...” the tail end of your pleas fall away with the fading night sky.
the man doesn’t need to be told twice.
save for a few shallow thrusts to get going, katsuki soon finds himself pistoning into you at an unruly, god speed pace. the blonde revels in the way one hand of yours twirls strands of his hair between your fingers whilst the other digs crescent moons into his blemished honey skin. helpless huffs and candied cries tickle bakugou’s ears while he presses your body flush against his and pins you down with his hips.
their movements don’t ever waver, cock catching on every ridge your damp pussy has to offer him, each thrust calculated amplify your pleasure that rolls in heatwaves throughout your body. katsuki’s mind grows blank, thick with the mirage you’ve cast over him from the way you push back against him, taking more of his inches into you.
“ngh, lovebug,” you say, high off of euphoria while katsuki’s leaking cock bears down harshly on your g-spot and you smile up at him deliriously— looking like the eighth wonder of the world. you grab the hand your husband uses to keep your thighs up and bring it down to your tummy for him to feel what you feel. “can feel your cock inside me, love, so big...makin’ my tummy bulge like a good daddy bear...”
something snaps within katsuki at the sound of your breathless praise; a feral blaze setting alight deep inside his chest— spreading throughout his body as his cock drives deeper and deeper inside your spongy, wet cunt— just about breaching the gates of your cervix. breed her. fuck her. make her swollen with your cum. bakugou can’t even think straight; intoxicated by the way you move against him, the way you look so full of him and his thick length.
he wants you to look full all of the time. so katsuki does with the only way he knows how. dropping his head to your neck, sharp attack your neck with blossoms of bruises forming under your skin in the name of love— you whine, a gorgeous symphony of his name against his ear while you tangle your fingers in the baby hairs at the nape of his neck. “y’can’t jus...jus say stuff like that to me, honey...” bakugou croons against your skin, screwing his eyes shut while his hips pick up the pace and plunging his length right into your womb. the sounds of your arousal wetly spill into the sex scented air— fuelling katsuki to thrust into you faster. “not if you...n-not if you don’t want me to fuck another one of those shitty brats into you.”
as stuttered as his words are, bakugou means every single one of them. a primal desire activates in the back of his mind, overriding every single of senses. just the thought of lining your womb with his pungent seed, making you pregnant once again and seeing you round and full with katsuki’s child is enough to drive him off of the rails. And the pro hero knows that you feel the same, he can tell by the way your heat clamps down on his cock and strangles him, as if to milk him of every ounce of his cum.
“yes, want you to make me pregnant suki, make me a mommy again, please—!” you simper out loud, desperate tears springing to your eyes while the bed groans beneath you. visions of you round and swollen with a baby drives him to thrust into you harder, faster so that more and more of his precum spills into you. “know you want it, want it too...your cum, deep inside me—ohmygod suki—yes!”
bakugou slaps a hand over your mouth, watching as your sweet doe eyes brim with tears at the languid roll of his hips against yours. “careful honeybee, don’t want the kids to...fuckin’ hell... h-hear—“ he stutters, eyes rolling, limbs shaking violently. his other hand drops between your conjoined bodies, drawing vicious circles into your swollen clit to draw you closer and closer to the edge. star dust is littered behind your eyes, the bright white signifying the race to your high that only katsuki can give to you. “or do you want to be heard, you want everyone to hear how full you’re gonna become when i get you pregnant again. how you’ll whine and beg me to suck on your tits when you start makin’ that sweet milk for our baby. is that what you fuckin’ want, yn?”
you can’t help the way your pussy flutters around his cock that brutally grazes your g-spot— the dirty words your husband speaks like music to your ears. a symphony with his moans and the sounds of his balls slapping against your bare ass. “oooh, shit baby, you must do with the way your lil cunny clamps down on me—just like that...”
“oh god, lovebug please...cum...cum! need it daddy bear—can’t take it anymore,” you babble against katsuki’s hand, brain turning to mush at the unbearable pleasure. the knot in your tummy becomes tighter, close to snapping as the white light of pleasure clouds your view.
patterns drawn diligently against your clit speed up; turning to quick figure of eights to tease your orgasm. “‘course you fuckin’ do honey baby, my little breeding bitch. my sweet little wife who can’t wait to be a mommy again. take this cock, you dirty whore. take it and I’ll give you my fuckin’ baby.” bakugou slurs, losing all control as the pace of his hips begins to falter. you can feel his dick twitching inside of you, tip pulsing with the need to paint your insides.
your gazes lock within the frenzy, while your back arches and hips lift to take your husband deeper inside you. dynamite is feral like you’ve never seen before; an animal reduced purely back to instinct. unfocused red eyes become teary like your own with hot pleasure while they lock onto you but you know that behind lust; loved the adoration and love your husband holds for you. thats all you need to reach the edge and tumble into your orgasm,
it takes but a few more thrusts and a pinch to your clit before you’re cumming— release squirting out and splattering against bakugou’s toned abdomen.
the blonde never lets up while you cum undone on his iron hot rod, letting him pump into you with unrelenting feverishness. katsuki is desperate, needing an extra push even with you strangling his cock with your insides. “s-say you’ll make your daddy a daddy baby, say you’ll give me another fucking kid. fuck, fuck yeah...please honey baby—“ bakugou damn near sobs, trembling violently above you as his breath hitches with ever hiccup.
smiling gently, you pull his head to your neck, cradling your husband while his pace slows to circular grinds. “i’ll make you a daddy again, you can cum for me now lovebug...”
“shit, shit, oh god— cummin’...” thats all bakugou needs to hear before bottoming out inside of your abused hole— screaming against your bitten flesh and forcing his cock into your fertile womb as he sprays with his thick, sticky seed. white coats every ridge and crevice of your pussy while impatient thrusts slow to sensual grinds. you feel the tears of neediness soak the supple skin of your neck, rocking your hips against katsuki to milk his cock for all it’s worth— even if slow waves of his cum seep down your folds and to the sheets below.
“g’morning, katsuki,” you sigh blissfully, fingers combing through your lover’s sweaty mop of sun kissed locks. the pair of you lie still, limbs still intertwined as you catch your breath under the orange hues of the light outside.
your husband shifts his head to look at you, eyelids heavy over blood red eyes with a satisfied look on his face. he’ll never get over having you all to himself first thing in the morning— katsuki bakugou will always consider that a luxury and as he looks to you, a great smile soon takes his features. “yeah...good fucking morning to you too, angel face,” bakugou doesn’t dare pull out of you, intent on keeping his word. “love you yn, you’re always so good to me...”
katsuk’s lips mould into a pout as you continue your earlier ministrations of brushing back sweat slicked hair away from his face before pressing a chase kiss to his lip and making his cock twitch from over sensitivity, inside of you. he was always a sucker for the romantic moments after a passionate round of sex, he was a domestic, love struck son of a bitch what could he say? “suki...lovebug, you know you can pull out if it’s too much,” you remind him, the sound of your voice pulling his attention back to you. as he stares; katsuki maps out every detail of your face, the way your eyes glitter in the mellow light that peeks from between closed curtains or the slight dip across your cheek in the form of a scar from where you’d been injured on the field— he spends time committing it all to memory as if it’s the last time he’ll get to witness such beauty. “you’re staring, bug.”
“nuh uh, not pulling out.” huffing, bakugou leans up for another kiss, which you happily provide him with as he curls up onto your chest like a kitten seeking warmth. “keepin’ you plugged full s’you can get preggers like i fuckin’ promised.”
“you were serious?” you question him first, earning yourself another grouchy huff before your eyes roll and a comfortable silence sweeps across your bedroom, periodically interrupted by the morning birds waking up and chirping. “always a man of your word, huh bug? don’t worry, we’ll make you a daddy bear soon, but i’ve got to clean up before the kids wake up.”
“don’ you fuckin’ move— leave the dumbass kids, they’ll be fine on their own.”
“not with taiga’s quirk coming through, now move, you’re heavy.”
with that, you manage to shove bakugou off of you and he only hisses lightly as his softened cock hits the cold air, already missing your heat. the banter between you both as husband and wife is always light and you always win; he wants to bite back but anything he says will be soft on his sharp tongue. damn you and you being the love of his life. bakugou watches as you fix his shirt over your frame and head to your en-suite bathroom to make yourself more presentable to your kids— mumbling something about how many times katsuki came inside of you.
sure there was a lot of it, but he’d only cum inside you twice and he was trying to give you a baby. again.
the shower turns on and he can hear the sound of water running but it doesn’t cover your sweet voice as you call for him. he could never miss that. “katsuki bakugou, you horny bastard, i love you, my daddy bear!” you sing for him; making the blonde smile.
“i love you more, honey baby,” he chuckles back, tucking himself back into sweats before settling back into the ruined sheets.
bakugou was so luckily to have you and you’re beautiful children— he wouldn’t trade any moment of his life for the world except for maybe more time with you. he swore, he’d spend forever loving you if he could.
“daddy?” sweet thoughts are cut off by the groggy voice of bakugou’s eldest daughter, taiga, who stands in the doorway of his bedroom rubbing her cherry red eyes.
the blonde grins, rising from his place in bed and crossing the room in three short strides. he quickly crouches down in front of his little girl and ruffle her unruly mop of matching blonde hair. “g’morning brat, what’s up?”
taiga clutches her shoto plushy tightly, the one uncle todoroki had gotten her for her first birthday ( the one that bakugou hated because it was his daughter’s favourite— kirishima hated it too because he had always thought he was the favourite uncle ), and pouts down at her father, scowling sleepily. bakugou knows if you could see the two of them now, you’d be saying she was the spitting image of him. “tatsumo woke up n wouldn’t stop whinin’, fink he’s hungry, daddy!” the little girl grumbles, clearly still reeling in the after effects of her sleep that got cut short.
“how about we go get him and make some pancakes then?” katsuki suggests softly, hauling his daughter onto his bare shoulders and being mindful not to drop her stupid fuckin’— i mean her plushy to the ground. “y’gonna help me mix up enough batter for ya ma n’ brother, you got that brat?”
taiga squeals as at the new found height, wrapping a singular chubby arm around bakugou’s head for support, making his heart burst at the tiny hand that grips his chin. fuck, he loved his life. “only if we can add choco chwips, daddy!”
“oi, don’t you push your fuckin’ luck with me brat, ya mommy might let you get away with eatin’ shit like that but not me—“ bakugou makes an attempt to scold his daughter while they make way towards his son’s room, but he already knows he’s going to give into her. he can’t say no to taiga.
“i’ll tell mommy you cursed at me!”
“why you little sh—“
“careful, katsuki, if you keep cursing her out i might have to put you on punishment later,” taiga bursts in to wriggly giggles on bakugou’s shoulders, making it harder to keep her in place as you brush past him to grab tatsumo from the nursery.
“daddy’s gonna get in trouble!”
the teasing tone to your voice lingers in the air while you fetch your son, who seems groggy and pouty when he comes into katsuki’s view— wrapped up in your arms while you wear a cleaner shirt of his. there’s that glint in your eye, similar to the one your children posses when they’re doing something mischievous. and that alone tells the ash blonde he’ll be getting punished in ways that could lead to another little one rushing through your house.
bakugou can roll with that.
but for now; he reaches up and pinches taiga’s nose— telling her to stop running her mouth and sending you into giggles while you carry your children downstairs for breakfast. katsuki bakugou couldnt remember the last time he’d gotten a full nights sleep, but what he did know is that he’d always remember the very saccharine mornings he’d get to spend with you and your beautiful children after.
“taiga, did you put chocolate chips in the batter even though i told you no?”
bakugou had turned his back for but a mere second to grab some milk for tatsumo; who played happily with smooshed bits of banana in his high chair— and suddenly, the batter was littered with the offending, tiny pieces of candy.
“no, it was mommy!”
you quickly throw your hands up in the air as defence, dropping the packet of sinful treats to the counter. “what? i’m having cravings, bakugou!”
“you’re not even pregnant, yn!” the man himself raises his spatula at you accusingly with a scowl, biting down on his tongue to prevent himself from cursing again.
you smile up at your husband, knowing he can’t stay mad at you for long. “but i will be, katsuki, it’s the thought that counts.” your eyes flicker up as you wipe the melted chocolate on your finger tips off with your tongue before moving to settle your daughter down for breakfast. bakugou splutters, cheeks flaming with a reddish rose at the thought of your soon to be baby and all the activity that comes with making one which makes you laugh. “oh and lovebug? your pancakes are burning.”
with a jump, katsuki turns to flick off the flame and save his batch of pancakes while you tend to your kids— leaving him to contemplate over your chocolate chip breakfast, how lucky he was to have you.
“i crave chocolate, can i get a pregnant?” taiga squeals shortly after.
“not a chance in hell, brat.”
@ozzy-bozzy @bakugous-mamas @meg-mystic @runningon-5percentsleep @cyans-bliss @husband-to-tomura-shigaraki @paintedr0ses1 @69meggg69 @sapphoscolonoscopy @toshidou @saucey-kneecapzz42020 @candybabey @alrunemara @greenchild
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↠ Pairing: Gojou Satoru x F!Reader
↠ Warning: mild manga spoiler mention, daddy! gojo, pure softness, hurt/comfort
↠ a/n: i love soft daddy gojo, it's my comfort piece (T^T) my baby fever flowing off the charts
↬ Word Count: 1.7k
Who knew that the domestic living felt so heavenly apart from the gruesome life Gojo was raised to witness. Never did it cross in his head that he'd get married. Heck no one expected someone would last with him for almost 7 years. It was a pleasant change of lifestyle, though it had been long since you were both in a relationship, he assumed that what you did in the past was already like something a married couple would do.
While he was right, the honeymoon phase didn't pass up between you two. Gojo was still the ever loving, affectionate person he was for his age. The only thing that thankfully grew was his maturity and acts of being responsible. Your married life has been nothing but cloud 9. It reached to the point where he became speechless and for the first time, numb when another human was welcomed to his world.
He swore from the moment he saw you that he'd never spare even the slightest attention to anyone. But for the moment, Gojo feels himself fall madly in love when the small bundle of joy laid on his stiff arms comfortably. Whether it was the way his baby fits perfectly in his embrace, the tiny body protected by his scarred, large figure, or when his big thumb was grabbed by smaller ones that barely engulfed the digit. He was reborn once again. You recalled his little whisper about how it hasn't even been a second, the little girl you've given him already made him weak in the knees and given up his every thing.
You should've taken a picture. If it was possible to cry and look beautiful, Gojo won, no complaints. But also because you wanted to capture his uncovered eyes, swimming with softness behind the glassy texture. You didn't say anything to ruin the little bond he's sharing with your little one.
Now he was attached every where your daughter would be. When she slept in her crib Gojo pleaded that he'd move it closer to your bed side, claiming so that he could watch over her closer and that there may be curses lurking any where around the area. Even if he's casted a protective veil ahead of time before birth. Sometimes you'd catch him late at night still wide awake. His finger would wiggle between the bars of the crib to entertain the also awoken baby in a way to lull her to sleep.
When you're in deep sleep next to your husband, you will be awoken to the sight of your baby in between your heads. No matter how many times you scold him for placing her in a spot where maybe one of you would probably suffocate(which will not happen because his and your instincts are off charts) he'd sheepishly smile at you claiming that having her close helps him sleep more than constantly checking after five minutes if she was still there, breathing and okay. Megumi was in the same state of shock as every one was seeing how the troublemaker who raised him turned out to be a different person. Poor Megumi had to suffer not only the duo knucklehead's teasing about being the jealous child, but also the second years.
It was a sight to behold how soft he's been lately. Attentive in every cry of needing a change of diaper, cry for milk, or a cry for attention or disturbance, Gojo would race you to it. How he balances his time in parenting and working late hours concerned you. Nothing has been the same ever since the multiple deaths of his former colleagues and teacher. To juggle around the bricks of disintegrated despair had him with a heavy heart. He doesn't know why he deserves to have the chance to have a family, but he knows it's his way of living for the those who's lost theirs and wanted the same paradise he has.
Through out the guilt and cruelty of the world that had rampaged on the innocent, there beside him fast asleep was the little one that held his existence together from falling deeper into his own melancholy with tiny, squishy hands. While you were finishing up in the showers, Gojo fights back the fluttering of his eyes, clearly in need of sleep after a long day of assisting the students and a couple of files from the pestering elders. A developed habit of his was to keep a sharp eye on his child at all times and close to him. He's done it before with you, it's funny how it heightened more on his daughter.
Seeing him fight the slumber his baby was already in was adorable, especially when he had a protective hand on her side and kept nuzzling the tiny body to his face. "Satoru, honey, you can sleep you know." placing down the dirty laundry. "You need sleep."
Having to be woken up a bit by your sweet voice, he melts and purrs quietly having his scalp scratched by you in hopes he'd rest for the night. "I can't keep my eyes off her."
"I'm here now, I'll put her back in the crib since she's fast asleep. You don't need to worry too much."
"I don't want her in the crib." whining, his long legs curls up to his stomach forming himself as a ball, the need to be closer to the his baby while pouting tiredly, "I feel like if I take a second away from looking, she'll be taken too."
After being sealed in the prism realm and returning to so much loss, though Gojo will never show how much this affected him. It was as if he was living the nightmare of his high school days once more. To think that having him gone would cost more than a spilled blood from a fighter, makes him wish he could split his body just so he can be there for every one. To save them.
But he has to remember his own proclaimed words that he can only rescue those who he can reach.
Your heart pinched whenever your husband would show vulnerability. He had been the loneliest for as long as he can remember to talk to someone about his own worries, "She won't be taken. She's safe here with us."
"You know I've never felt this completed in my life." having your genes and his mixed into the this very human in his arms amazes him until now, he couldn't help but trace gently a finger across from her puffed up cheek to the tiny button nose, "I've never been more terrified of the thought of losing you and her more than ever. Never been afraid of ending up lonely." he whispers in a tone slightly going higher, thinking he was also talking to the baby.
"I don't want to close my eyes or go anywhere and wake up to lose all of this."
Coming down to your side of the bed, finally having his face in your vision. There wasn't just exhaustion in his bright blue eyes that peered in adoration of your child— it more than a simple, fond fatherly look. If eyes could talk, you could understand how they were pleading for what they look at to never disappear from sight. To never become the replica of the past. He wanted to cry for mercy, to no longer take any of what was dear to him. If it means he has to give up these good for nothing abilities, he would for the sake of of all that is good.
"You make me happy— she makes me happy." squishing his cheek gently to hers, "I don't want to lose that too."
"You'll never lose us, Satoru." you cooed as you reached over to cup his jaw, stroking carefully the side of his face in process of closing his eyes, "So don't lose yourself for us. Please."
He holds onto the back of your hand in gratitude. Silently spilling an i love you for sheltering him from his conflicts. The people didn't lie when they said he had the whole world in his hands; an innocent child and a soulmate he could never be enough of. They didn't know that those were the only world that made him breath lively again.
A small whimper between you interrupted the approaching slumber he was about to achieve. "Hey, hey, did daddy wake you?" patting the distressed child by her bum, "I'm sorry, shhh." through kisses and cooing pressed on her scrunched up face, he wins over the cries of your daughter who fell back into dreamland happily. Gojo re adjusting his position in bed to stretch his arms to embrace you both, resting his hand on your hip.
With your lids feeling heavy already, you removed the hand on your hip and instead, held on them close to where your heart was beating. A reminder for Gojo that you weren't going anywhere along with the cute snores from the person between you. Gojo doesn't fall right asleep after you, he likes to take his time doing his sappy routine of watching both of his favorite girls snuggled near him. They did say you don't know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Even if he's done this all the time it never grows old. In a world where any time anyone could be taken away, every thing mattered.
He's never had one final moments with the fallen— he knows he can never laugh fully at the game of life and death. He knows he can't recover fast after losing too many pieces of the puzzle. But he can always build a new one and solve it together with what he has. The pieces cannot be replaced, but from there he knows it'll become an utterly different masterpiece. One where both heaven and earth can smile upon. You lose something, you gain something. As silly as it sounds, Gojo understood more as he held onto you and cuddling closer to the baby. It'll be okay. There's no telling when and where, but what matters most is that he still has a part of his family before and now he swore to protect.
Finally, Gojo sleeps in the hands of his world. Knowing it'll be there when he wakes up.
© all content belongs to mochikeiji. Please do not repost or copy, ありがとうございました!! (=^･^=)
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stop calling me your bunny
eren jeager x female reader
summary - 𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙚𝙮𝙚𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙖 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙙𝙚𝙣𝙩...
reader has developed somewhat of an unhealthy crush on her married professor, unfortunately for her... he’s more than willing to take advantage of her naivety.
𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: nsfw content, smut, fingering, unprotected sex, corruption, praise, daddy kink, cheating
peering through your half lidded gaze you saw him. tall and slim, the aura that clouded his presence had a mysterious tint to it, quite dark actually. you might have even been scared of him at one point, although you were far too curious to stay away from him.
your eyes followed him around the room as he explained the topic of today’s lesson. you watched him pull out a black marker from the drawer of his desk before walking back over to the dry erase board, writing and underlining words you didn’t bother to read considering your mind was much too focused on the way his hands looked as he wrote them. the wedding band on his finger complimented it well enough.
of course at this point no one was really paying attention to his physical movements, no one except for you. the words that were being spoken would not have made sense if they were leaving anyone else’s lips but his.
therefor you were always the first person to understand, the first person to get done with the assignments, the first person to get the correct answer, and your efforts did not go unnoticed.
admittedly, you were his favorite. he often compared other students to you, used your work as examples of what to do right, he even defended you to other staff members if there was ever a problem.
every time he asked a question, your hand was the first one up, just like he knew it would be. every time you got an answer right, which you always did, and if not he’d let you retry until you got it, he’d reward you with simple praises that weren’t so simple to you. instead they made your face heat up, your heart stop, sometimes even your panties wet.
as innocent as his interest in you seemed to be to your classmates and to other teachers, it was nothing of the sort.
secretly, he loved to admire you from afar. he loved the cute little ribbons you used to decorate your hair, he loved the elegant collared shirts you wore over those pretty pastel skirts, and he especially loved the lacy material of your thigh highs that usually covered most of your gorgeous legs. much like what you wore today.
he thought you were so smart, so sweet, so mature, so beautiful. he had grown very fond of you in the past few months you had been in his class. with that being said his intentions were everything but pure, he didn’t want you as a lover, or as a fuck buddy per say, more like he wanted you to be his little toy.
perhaps he needed to rethink his very sinful desire to use you, manipulate you, have you follow him around, to look up to him with those worshiping eyes. except for he had rethought it, over and over again and he still came to the wicked conclusion that you weren’t a person, with things such as feelings, morals, and dreams. that instead you were more like a 𝙥𝙚𝙩, your purpose only for him to play with you.
no, you were much too smart to let that happen. you understood what he intended to do to you, partially because you wanted to do the same to him. or at least as first, soon your interest in him grew a bit further than simple lust.
from the first day you walked into class he caught your eye. you weren’t the only one who noticed how handsome he was, but he was married so everyone else knew better than to try to flirt with him.
in fact his wife worked right across campus, she was a teacher as well. he also had a son who was in high school, only a couple years younger than you were at that.
every time someone brought up these factors in class he was hesitant to talk about it, eyes searching around the room for yours, trying to make sure the discussion didn’t make you look at him any differently, and it never did.
see he explained to you that him and his wife had been having problems for a while, waiting to split until after his son graduated high school. granted that didn’t make either of your feelings right. you knew how wrong it was to fantasize about your married teacher, you just didn’t care.
his wife was a true piece of shit, you’d seen the way she flirted with other men, right in front of mr jeager even. you didn’t want him with her, he was yours. you wanted him, you deserved him, you could treat him better, you would treat him better.
it made you absolutely sick to picture him with another women. touching her, kissing her, loving her...you could vomit just thinking about it.
it started out as nothing more than a schoolgirl crush but now it was so much more. you didn’t take interest in the boys your age now, here recently his class had been the highlight of your day, you looked forward to seeing him more than normal.
you hadn’t even noticed that your focus had strayed away from the lesson and onto... other things.
he was absolutely godlike. everything from the stunning features on his face to his beautifully toned body. oh his body, you wished nothing more than to be able to feel his warm skin against yours, be so utterly close to him that you could hear the sound of his cold dark heart beating inside of his confined chest. words couldn’t describe how much you longed for that feeling.
you had no idea how distracted you appeared to be to the rest of your class, including mr jeager. your eyes focused on one single corner of the room, far away from your professor at that. even so you were still thinking of him as you had the image of him engraved into your mind.
imagining all of the naughty things you wanted to do to him, all of the things that were better left unspoken of as they were much too inappropriate to say aloud. you let your eyes travel back to him now, fixated on his perfect figure. the only thing stopping you from seeing that beautiful body of his was the weak barrier of the blazer that fit him so well, squeezing his rather large arms just right.
you couldn’t even register what exactly it was you were doing as you brought the hot pink pen up between your lips to bite at the end of it as you stared at his body shamelessly. your eyes hazy with pure lust.
your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a beautiful, familiar voice.
“y/n, can you tell us what that is?”
your eyes that were previously glued to his chest shot up to meet eren’s. you were flustered that for the first time you didn’t know the answer, actually you couldn’t even recall the subject of the lesson.
“i-i don’t know, i’m sorry sir”
“ah. that’s okay sweetheart, can anyone else tell me the answer?” he flashed you a sympathetic smile
your head dropped back down in embarrassment, you were used to his playful pet names that he would only call you but still the fact that you didn’t get in trouble was shocking. if that had been anyone else he would have said something along the lines of “we quite literally just went over this” or “is it really that difficult to pay attention?” yet since it was you and not one of your other classmates he was letting it slide.
the rest of the class you just kind of kept your head down and tried your best to pay attention silently. you knew it wasn’t a big deal at all but that didn’t change the amount of heat that still lingered on your cheeks from the encounter. you didn’t know the answer, not only because you weren’t listening but also because you were too busy imaging dirty fantasies between you and your married teacher.
to make matters worse, you normally saved the lewd scenarios for when you were alone in the comfort of your own bedroom, free to think as many disgusting things as you wanted while you had your hand slipped down your panties. yet today it was different. your need for him had grown stronger, you wanted him so badly it was starting to effect your abilities to pay attention in class. you hadn’t lusted over any boy like this, actually you weren’t even lusting over a boy at all, in fact it was a man.
you felt relieved when you finally heard the bell ring, immediately getting up to collect your books and go home.
“y/n can you please stay for just a bit longer, there’s a few matters i would like to discuss with you in private.”
you nodded your head yes without turning around to look at him. you had stayed after class a couple of times, just so you could ask questions that you really already knew about previous assignments. even so he’d stay every time just because he enjoyed your company, that’s how the two of you got closer and he revealed things about his personal life. still it was nothing too unprofessional.
once you’d seen everyone else had already cleared out you turned around to face him. he was lounging back in his chair, book in hand before he removed one of them, patting a particular spot on his desk that you usually sat on when you stayed after class.
you gave him a slight smile, making your way across the room to sit where he told you to.
he let out a sigh before putting his book down on the table
“y/n are you feeling alright today? you seemed distracted in class? you’re not sick are you?”
“oh uhm yeah, i’m fine, i just feel a bit frustrated that’s all” you murmured
“aw frustrated? what about? Is something going on at home maybe?” he brought his hand up your leg, letting it sit there. he pretended as if this action was taken out of efforts to comfort you but really it was just a pathetic attempt to get even closer to your body than he already was.
you looked down to his hands that were now placed dangerously close to your inner thigh. you were already happy that he cared about you enough to notice even the slightest behavior change but the feeling of his hands on your skin was making you dizzy, your mind already starting to wonder it’s way back to the nasty thoughts from earlier.
“y/n? come on darling you can tell me what’s going on” he gave your leg a pat, this time letting his fingers point upwards so they grazed the hem of your skirt.
once again with the pet names, this man was driving you mad.
“mhm it’s kind of weird” you murmured, your eyes focusing on his lap so you didn’t have to look him in the eye.
“don’t be ridiculous. if somethings distracting you from reaching your true potential in my class i want to know what it is and what i can do to help”
he should have just kept his mouth shut. now it was time to test the waters, to see how far you could actually take this and to see how open he was to the idea of letting you have him.
“it’s... you” your voice was quiet, laced with naivety and innocence as you spoke.
he already knew exactly what you meant but that didn’t mean he was gonna let you know that. he was gonna take this opportunity, he had been waiting to ruin you for so long and now was his chance, how could he ever allow himself to resist.
he rolled his chair up so his chest was pressed right up against your closed knees, his large hands still resting on your lap.
“huh?” he mumbled, his facial expression convincing you he was genuinely confused when he wasn’t.
you paused to stare at him for a second, lips parting to speak but you just couldn’t find the words so instead you continued to stare at each other.
“it’s just you look really nice today”
he sighed, finally letting his long fingers trail up the bottom of your skirt slowly.
“honey.. now i’ve noticed this little crush you seem to have on me but... i’m your teacher. and married at that. don’t ya think you might get along better with one of the boys your age?”
you felt your face grow hot at his obvious rejection, looking up at him with your teary eyes. so he knew, which meant he must have caught on much earlier. if so then why did he feed into it? he had to have wanted you as much as you wanted him.
“no sir the-they aren’t like you. they’re stupid and immature” you whined
“they aren’t smart and strong and sweet like you” you looked down into his eyes making sure he saw the tears threatening to spill from yours
“please let me have you just this once, please daddy?”
you knew how bold your words were. you knew how absolutely unprofessional and disgraceful your pleads were too, you couldn’t care less.
this time it was him who felt his stomach turn, his eyes that widened in shock. he knew what you were doing and god did he think it was amusing. attempting to manipulate him like that? batting your pretty little teary eyes at him? calling him such a dirty nickname? maybe you did exist solely for him to corrupt you.
he also knew that you knew the effect your words would have on him. you learned from the best after all.
there were no more light touches, this time you felt the quick movement of his hand gliding up your skirt so he could squeeze the soft flesh of your thighs.
“just what exactly are you asking of me angel, come on use your words. i did teach you communication was key did i not?”
“i want you” you blurted, expecting nothing less of him, of course he’d ask such a question knowing exactly what you meant.
“more specific” he whispered.
you let out a deep breath as you felt him trace a finger up and down the front of your panties. this would be a lot easier if he wasn’t watching your every move with that intimidating gaze of his. he didn’t let his eyes stray away from yours, not even for a moment. they were so beautiful, even with that terrifyingly dark look in them.
“make me cum” although it sounded like a demand it was most definitely a plea. you wanted for him to give you something; anything just so you could except whatever it may be greedily, appreciatively.
“ah how nice, using your big girl words” the finger on your panties pressing down to put pressure on your clit. your body jerking toward his hand for more.
“i suppose angels who use big girl words should be allowed to participate in big girl activities no?” he hummed, fingers coming up to slip into your panties, keeping them distanced still, so close yet so far from where you needed them most.
“yeah..” you whispered back
that’s when he finally let you feel his touch, fingers cupping your soaked folds as he let one of them find it’s way to your clit, rubbing slow circles onto the sensitive bud.
this action shouldn’t have made you whimper so loud but never the less it did. your hand coming down to grab his wrist so you could grind against his fingers more.
“thank you thank you” you mewled pathetically
“mhmmm such an appreciative girl, always saying please and thank you. how polite” he mumbled against your ear before nibbling at it, his fingertips grazing your entrance.
“can you please just keep going” you begged, head falling back as you felt his breath on your skin
“you’ve been such a good girl, of course I can. but i want to watch how good you take my fingers”
you whined when you felt him slip his hand out of your panties, then he was grabbing the sides of them, pulling them down your legs and stuffing them into his pocket.
the feeling of the cold desk on your exposed bottom made you shiver a bit but your discomfort didn’t last long, he grabbed the end of your skirt, bunching it up to your waist as he used his other hand to force your thighs apart. his eyes darting down to your most private place.
being on display for him didn’t feel as violating as it should have, the uncertainty of the fact that he could do whatever he wanted to you in this moment and you’d let him just made the experience all the more thrilling.
“so so pretty, so wet, y’know you’re even dripping down onto my desk” his praise was enough to make your body tremble, clit throbbing for his attention.
he must’ve read your mind because a second later he was slipping his index finger into you, watching in awe at the way your pussy sucked it in greedily.
you moaned out, so incredibly thankful for what he was doing to you right now.
“yeah ‘s tight too” he whispered more to himself than to you, going even faster because of how addicted he was to the sight of you squirming underneath him in pleasure.
he had barely started toying with you and you were already shaking at the feeling like a little virgin who had never been touched. he knew it was because he was much more skilled in the bedroom due to his multiple years of experience. still it was fun to watch your reactions.
soon he was replacing his index finger with his middle and ring, letting his palm rub up against your clit as thrusted his fingers upwards. aiming to hit that special spot that had you screaming, and he did. surprising even you at how undeniably amazing he was at making you forget your own name with how talented his fingers were.
“feels so good” you cried as he fastened his pace, his actions creating such an extreme amount of pleasure it almost burned.
“feels so good yeah? aw i bet it does. those little boys in your class have no idea how to touch you huh? can’t even find your little clit no matter how hard they try” he laughed, ramming up against that spot even harder.
you just sobbed louder nodding at his accusations because you knew they were true. you’d had sex plenty of times before but no man had ever cared enough to give you the relief you so desperately needed, not even once. you were always left to finish yourself off afterwards.
you squeezed your eyes shut, the overwhelming sensation had taken over to the point it was difficult to keep them open. you felt his other hand travel up your body, giving your tits a squeeze before grabbing your neck so he could come up to give you a sloppy open mouthed kiss.
you returned it immediately, your hands sliding up to tangle them into his hair. you started frantically grinding your hips into his hand as he continued working you toward your orgasm. you felt that all too familiar feeling in the pits of your stomach when he moaned into your mouth, your mind had gone completely thoughtless. you could barely make out what was going on.
his body felt so large compared to yours. he towered over you, making you feel so protected, as if you were in safe hands. although you were naive to feel that way stupid even, in that moment it didn’t matter one bit.
“gonna be a good little girl and cum all over daddy’s fingers yeah?”
“yeah” you confirmed, head falling back, body spasming uncontrollably under the weight of his as your orgasm wrecked through you. moans and whimpers slipping through your parted lips pathetically as you did so.
still in a hazy state after your previous release, you didn’t even notice his long fingers reaching for the buttons on your shirt, undoing them thoroughly. you looked down at your chest, the lacy black bra already appearing over the confines of your shirt which would soon be discarded onto the floor.
then he was grabbing you by the waist, forcing you up off of the desk so you could stand in front of him, turning you around so your nearly naked back was to his broad chest.
you felt his large hands snake up your torso, cupping over your breasts to knead them gently between his fingers. feeling the way his chest heaved up and down behind you, the mere presence of his physical body so warm it made you want to melt right then and there.
the way he held you so carefully, but not as if you were something fragile, yet still meant to be handled cautiously, not to be broken. it made you feel so grown up. you were of course, but this was the first man to actually treat you like so. you’d honestly never felt like such a woman.
you gasped when you heard the snap of the clasp on the back of your bra, self consciousness filling your brain as it fell to the floor. yet the insecurity was short lived as he whispered into your ear.
“such a beautiful body, bunny” your heart began to flutter, his breath hot on your neck, pieces of his long hair tickling it lightly. his hands finally making contact with your bare chest. his rough yet so gentle fingertips brushing over your sensitive nipples while he repeated the action he was taking seconds prior.
the first man who actually wanted to take you as is, without the ridiculous unrealistic expectations of what a woman should be. the man before you had seen it all, he would never mind the body hair, or the stretch marks, or whatever “flaws” society deemed to be unacceptable. in fact he would embrace them.
his soft lips ghosted over your neck as you whined more at the sheer feeling of vulnerability than the feeling of his hands on your body.
“take me” you blurted impatiently. like mentioned, you wanted to give him everything you could possibly offer. not just for your sake but for his too. at this moment you knew whatever your feelings may be they couldn’t have only consisted of lust because if it were only lust your heart wouldn’t grow heavy when he dared touch you like this.
“want me to fuck you real good eh? give you something these pesky little college boys couldn’t in a million years right?”
“yes, please?” you meant it too. at this point you’d say anything, do anything, risk anything, just to feel him in the most intimate of ways.
“bend over the desk for me” you were so relieved when you heard the sound of his belt being undone, so desperate for him it almost hurt.
you did as told, yelping a bit when your felt his hands grab at your hips roughly.
“you think you can take it? huh sweet girl?”
you nodded eagerly. yet as prepared as you thought you were, you still gripped at the side of the desk when you felt his tip prodding at your entrance.
“all of it? you’re really sure?” he teased, starting to slip in now.
you cried out, still nodding though. he was big, much bigger than what you’d ever taken before. still it was all the more reason for you to want him. you were sure he was gonna fuck your lights out, sure he wouldn’t disappoint, and spoiler alert he didn’t.
“ah fuck you’re tight. it’s gonna hurt for a sec okay baby?” he groaned into your ear.
once he finally bottomed out he started to rub circles into your hips in efforts to comfort you. granted it didn’t do much considering how good he was splitting you open, your jaw dropped at the painful sensation. it only took a few more moments of burning pain for the feeling to turn pleasant.
the hold he had on your hips grew tighter when he pulled out slowly, returning with a harsh thrust causing you to moan out. when he saw you were okay, he repeated the action once more, this time a bit faster.
again your reactions were rewarding, each whimper louder than the last every time he pushed his hips into yours. the delicious feeling of him filling you up so nicely was taking away your ability to form a coherent thought.
you couldn’t help but feel prideful when you noticed how shallow the breaths of the man behind you had gone, letting out soft moans that you were thankful you could hear over your own and the sound of skin clapping of course.
“pussy so good, you’re so good, my good girl yeah?”
you hissed when you felt his fist tangle into your hair, giving it a harsh tug as he quickened his merciless pace. even while he was fucking you so hard he still made efforts to inform you of how much of a good job you were doing.
“yeah. ‘m your good girl” you panted. even his simplest praises made your cheeks heat up.
“mhmm that’s right. always have been too. such an obedient little bunny. so- 𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠!- so proud of you, taking daddy’s cock so well”
this time you really couldn’t respond, yet your body still could. you were clamping down on him as soon as those words left his lips, your hips involuntarily bucking back up against his.
“eren!” you sobbed, eyes squinting, vision becoming blurry as you were only seconds away from climax. you figured you should at least be able to call him by his first name considering he was balls deep in your cunt at this very moment.
you felt the warmth of his sweaty chest lowering over your back, his hands that were previously tangled in your hair came down to play with your clit. your mouth falling open as soon as you felt the action, pitiful cries and broken pleas coming out of it.
“you feel that? that little knot in your tummy? you’re gonna cum for me aren’t ya bunny?”
it wasn’t even a real question, it was more of an observation at this point. you were squeezing him so incredibly tight, causing his own hips to falter, it was obvious you were close and it didn’t matter if he gave you permission or not, you were gonna cum.
“shit y/n baby” he moaned into your ear
“do you know how fuckin precious you are? so fucking wet, love this pretty little cunt”
you wish you could say that the only reason you were enjoying this so much was because it was the first time a man had ever made you cum but in reality it was so much more.
“you want me to tell you a little secret” you felt the heat of his breath fan over your neck before he yanked your hair back to whisper into your ear
“out of all my years, out of all of the sloppy little cunts ive been inside of... 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙝𝙖𝙙.”
he couldn’t have chosen better words. maybe it was just something he said in the heat of the moment. regardless you were gonna remember it all the same. the words that he had spoke were not only implying that it was better than the countless of women he had been with over the years but also implying that it was better than his own wife’s as well. you couldn’t have been more disgustingly overjoyed.
then the bubble of euphoria that had morphed in your stomach was bursting, intense pleasure filling your entire body as you sobbed out unintelligible fragments of sentences. something along the lines of “i’m cumming!” and “oh fuck!”
the amount of satisfaction your orgasm gave you was nothing compared to the pure bliss you felt knowing that he was proud of you, that you were making him feel good. now you looked at him with even more admiration in your starlit eyes. was it possible this was what love felt like?
the amount of trust you had already given away to this monster of a man was unclear to you until it was much too late. would you grow to regret it? yes. but after all 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙖 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙙𝙖𝙮
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The Dark Prince pt.1 | JJK
𝔓𝔞𝔦𝔯𝔦𝔫𝔤: Prince!Jungkook X Caretaker! freader
𝔊𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: Yandere, Royalty!au, Curse!au, Smut, Angst, 4k
𝔖𝔶𝔫𝔬𝔭𝔰𝔦𝔰: His family name cursed, Jungkook is doomed to live his life in the furthest tower of the castle, alone and abandoned. You are charged with serving his highness with any need he may have, no matter the demand.
𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: 18 +M smut, mentions of curses and witches, mentions of hexes, mentions of death (side character), mentions of corruption, angst, pillow humping, rutting, orgasm, mentions of cum and touching cum, anger, obsession, misunderstandings, abandonment, future smut.
pt.1 - pt. 2 - pt. 3 - pt. 4 - pt. 5 - pt. 6 - pt. 7 - Final
The rain poured heavily, the night sky blinding the man who attempted to lead the carriage through the dark forest. His passenger, a prince of the Jeon family, woke him in the middle of the night stating an emergency and that he had to leave at once. As the driver raced through the night, he abruptly pulled on the reins, barely missing a woman in the middle of the road who stood almost invisible in the darkness.
“Why have we stopped”, yelled the prince from within the protection of his carriage.
“T-there’s a woman your highness.”
The prince felt his heart grow cold and the shivers flowing throughout his body could not be blamed on the cold of the night. It could only be one woman, and he realized in that moment he had run long enough. Stepping out of his carriage cautiously, he squinted his eyes willing them to focus in the dark, preparing to meet his fate.
The woman turned around, her eyes brilliantly reflecting the moonlight as she pulled back
the veil from her face. She was beguiling and when the driver saw her, he immediately came down from his seat to kneel in her presence. Eyes glazed over, he indulged in the hexed caresses she gifted him before he took his last breath. Walking over his body on the dirt floor, the witch inched her way toward her target. Prince Jeon knew this day would come, his time had run out. Stepping back, he prepared for whatever fate this woman would bring, that is, until she kissed him.
“Just as you have broken my heart, I will break yours. You knew I loved you, yet you married another. I curse your descendants from now until eternity. You future sons will bear my curse and will never know love. You wanted another woman...so now...you’re lineage will suffer.”
One last kiss, she released a vapor from her mouth, waiting as it filled the royal’s entire being. Smirking, she stepped back and disappeared into the very darkness from where she came, leaving the young Jeon to faint on the rocky soil.
Several generations later:
“The queen has given birth, your majesty, and…”
The king glared at the lady-in-waiting wondering what her hesitation was all about. He had been waiting long enough, wondering if he would have the son he’d always dreamed of, the one to rule over the kingdom someday, but a piercing scream stole his attention.
“What is happening? I thought the queen already gave birth?”
The lady, fearful for her life and her position with the queen, fell to her knees, planting her face against the hard cemented ground.
“Your highness….the child...the child…”
Losing patience, the king spat out venomously, “SPEAK!”
Trembling uncontrollably, the girl spoke the words she knew the king would fear...the one thing he had prayed against for years, even calling in healers and witches to prevent.
The king’s countenance fell, the news shocking him into silence. He had gotten all the promises, the assurance that the curse would certainly pass over his own child, but it seems all of them had lied. He wouldn’t be so good-fortuned to have a curse skip his heir to the throne. Every generation before him suffered the same fate, but luckily they had other male successors. He, however, was not so lucky. At a young age, an accident declared him unable to have children, but by some miracle he had been able to get his wife with child. At his advanced age, he knew this was his last chance.
Walking around the crouched form on the floor, he walked into the queen’s room only to see several of the women-in waiting dead on the floor, the midwife blinded by a cloth around her eyes. She heard a sound to her left and immediately pulled the baby tighter, hiding his vision from whomever had entered the room.
“This baby is cursed, turn back now!”
The king noticed his wife was passed out on the bed and the little bundle of joy now being hidden looked like any other innocent newborn, but the bodies on the floor told another story.
“Silence! Let me have my son.”
The midwife panicked feeling embarrassed for having spoken to the king with such a tone, but she couldn’t be sure. She didn’t want anymore deaths. “Your highness.”
She extends the baby out waiting for the king to grab him. The king, unsure of what he’ll see, walks cautiously toward the newborn, wondering if his life would be spared as all the Jeon’s before were. When he gets close enough to see, the baby turns to look at him with eyes as red as the coals of a fiery furnace. It was enthralling. Beautiful was an understatement, the child, though cursed, was a true inheritor of royalty. Grabbing the baby and holding him up to his chest, he could see now how the curse worked; charm and beauty. Any that looked upon his son would face their death. Any who were drawn in by the corruption in his eyes.
Releasing a breath, the king smiled at the baby wondering if he truly was cursed. Something so beautiful and pure surely could not have done such evil things. When he turns to check him in the light, the baby manages to glance at the midwife who in her ignorance removed her blindfold to tend to the queen. In an instant she drops to the floor like a sack of potatoes. In horror, the king covers the baby’s face before walking over to his queen who has now regained consciousness.
“We cannot let this happen. No one must know.”
The queen in her weakened state nodded oblivious to the chaos around her. She had an idea about the screams, but was not awake to see all the bodies lying around her bed. Handing the queen the baby, the king kisses her forehead before walking out of the room in search of a solution. If these healers weren’t able to stop his child from being born cursed, perhaps they could remove it now that he was born. There had to be a solution and he wasn’t going to give up.
He had no other sons to take over for him someday, and he'd be damned if his only existing heir would be stripped of his title. Shaking his fist in the air, he vowed to never stop seeking an end to the curse, hating that it all began with the one Jeon royal who had betrayed a witch all those centuries ago.
“You cannot threaten your nanny dear boy. Who will feed you then?” The young prince’s nanny teased as she slid his food through the slot on the solid metal door that protected all who entered the tower. She was lucky enough not to be killed, having been some sort of miracle angel that Jungkook took a liking to early on. She’d been able to care for him since he was young, being one of three people that were still alive after looking into the eyes of the young prince, but as he got older and smarter, it was impossible to keep him from roaming. Soon the decision of locking him in the southern tower was made, leaving her as his only source of care and companionship.
“Oh come on, old woman, I've spared your life this long, why not let me out of this place?”
“You know good and well why I don’t, besides, it’s been decreed by the king. You wouldn’t want to see me get hung would you?”
Jungkook chuckled at his nanny, the way her wit always matched his own made him smile. There was a reason why he hadn’t taken her life that he had yet to understand, but he was happy that there was at least someone to keep him company. It was true no one was to let him out, as a matter of fact, no one was even allowed to visit him at all. His parents came once a month, but they left all the responsibilities to his caretaker. She would feed him, bring him clean clothes and lines, even read him to sleep, but now that he turned twenty three, he was growing bored.
“I wouldn’t allow it. I am the prince. You’re my favorite person. I’m mature enough to leave, I know I am. I won’t hurt anyone, I promise.”
“Oh young sweet boy. I know that, but your eyes tell another story. You can’t help what you do.”
The old woman turned to grab the now clean royal jacket she meticulously prepared for him. She did this with all his things, loving the boy like her own, even if he was cursed with a power beyond her imagination. She didn’t believe he could pose such a danger when she first met him, having been the thirtieth person in line to fill this position. She had heard of all the previous women jumping off the castle tower and even killing themselves in front of the boy’s eyes. He’d been painted a monster, an evil killer, but his curse he could not help. For some reason, when it was her turn to meet him , the young child loved her right away. The King and Queen immediately hired her, forcing her to commit to the care of their son on the threat of death to her and her family. They were desperate, she came to realize that later, and she couldn’t blame them.
“I am not a killer. I’m just me. Why can’t people see that? Am I to be locked in here for the rest of my life!?”
“Hush now, young one. Your parents are still seeking a remedy. I know they will find one soon.”
“At what price? I’m mad….mad with loneliness and starved for touch. This is no way to live.”
“I know, sweet boy. I know.”
Leaving his highness in order to tend to her own life, the caretaker closed the door to the tower leaving Jungkook to stew in his thoughts once again. Although he had everything he could ever need in his tower, the room lavishly appropriate for his royal status, he felt abandoned and alone. His parents always promised a solution, but he was an adult now, and his patience was growing thinner.
The next morning Jungkook awoke to an empty room once again, his fireplace having gone out some time during the night causing a chill to run up his spine. It was enough to make him bury his head under the thick wool blankets his sweet caretaker had requested especially for him. She’d be there any minute to make sure he had enough firewood and a full belly to keep him warm. He could see the flurries falling outside his window, the wooden shutters doing nothing to keep the cold out.
Lithely he stretched his body, suddenly aware of the arousal beneath his silk pajamas. Too many mornings he’d woken up just like this with no way to quell his desires. Of course just like any man, he’d wrap a hand around himself and spill his seed on his pillow, something his sweet old keeper never brought up when the laundry had to be done. And he never regretted it, not once, knowing that his semen was probably also cursed as well.
It wasn’t enough that he had to live his life locked away, but his own eyes always reminded him daily of the evil lurking within him, stealing his peace. He never meant to hurt people, it just happened, and he hated it.. All of the Jeon’s that carried this damnation would end up marrying and becoming even more evil. Some speculated that love made them mad, their evil corrupting everything in its path, but this time it was different. This time, he was the only heir, and the kingdom below his tower needed a leader, thus the obsession his parents had with finding a solution. However, in all this time, a cure has never been found.
He wondered often if they even loved him. How could parents just place their child inside of a tower for over a decade and not bat an eyelash? He could excuse them but for the fact that they hardly came to see him. Maybe they were busy, he mused. Why else would they not come?
A sudden knock to his door brings him out of his reverie, his thoughts already too overbearing. He stands to slide his feet into the fluffiest wool slippers made by the one and only person who’s ever shown him love. ‘To keep your royal feet warm’, she had told him. Smiling he walks over ready to greet her and accept her delicious food.
“It’s about time old woman, I could have starved waiting.”
The response he received was not expected. A male with a deep voice cleared his throat before speaking. “Your highness, I bring grave news. Your caretaker has passed away. The majesties are currently seeking someone new. Please await further information. Here’s a meal sent by her majesty.”
A bowl of oatmeal slid through the small window, the opening that he would share with the only person in the world that loved him. He knew she did….and now... she was gone? He stared at the steam rising from the bowl, his mind completely numb and spaced out. Had he heard correctly? Before he could ask, the sound of the tower's doors closing made it clear the knight had run out just as quickly as he was sent in. They probably chose him due to his position as an elite soldier for the king, as if a mere suit of armor were enough to protect him from Jungkook’s power.
“Death…” Jungkook repeated to himself, his lips barely moving, the word like acid on his tongue. She couldn’t be dead...not her. He never hurt her, would never hurt her. It took him a moment to understand what was happening and to register the fact that he was going to be alone-- again.
Time passed by, hours without a word about his caretaker and the reason for her death. He wasn’t sure about the lengths his power could go, but he was sure he hadn’t done anything to kill her. As if on cue, moments before he lost his composure, the doors to the tower open. The creaking louder than he remembered, causing him to spring up from the hunched position he’d been in for hours.
Running to the door of his room, he presses his ear against it eager to hear some kind of life on the other side that would inform him of the events that have transpired.
The voice coming from the other side was one he hadn’t heard in a month and Jungkook hated that it took death for his father to come and see him again. Walking backwards until his legs hit the edge of his bed frame, he falls back onto the mattress, his body bouncing off the springs.
“What?” Jungkook replies, his tone a bit more annoyed than he meant it. He was partially annoyed with his non-existent parents, added with the death of someone he’s come to love as his own family.
“I’m sorry. I know you loved, _____. The doctors said she didn’t suffer, having passed away in her sleep. I hope this brings you comfort.”
Gripping the sheets in anger, his bottom lip on the verge of bleeding from the way his top teeth pressed into his skin, he held his tongue at the words he wanted to say-- angry at the way his father could speak her name so easily. She was the only person Jungkook loved and now she was gone.
“How?”, was the only word Jungkook spoke. He was worried it was his fault, that he had made this happen and that he'd ruined the only good thing he had in life. His mind scrambled with endless scenarios of what might happen to him without someone to keep him grounded. What if he was left alone from now on? What if he were left to rot for the rest of his life--alone?
“The doctors aren’t sure, but they believe it to have been natural causes. It wasn’t you if that’s what you think.”
“I didn’t say that!”
Not wanting to argue with his obviously distraught son, the king simply walked to the exit, preparing his last words carefully. “Tomorrow there will be a new caretaker. It is the daughter of your beloved elder.”
Jungkook stopped breathing, his heartbeat so loud in his ears he thought for sure he misheard. “Daughter?”
How could they just send someone new without knowing whether or not he’d end their life? And even though that was the biggest concern, the fact that his old caregiver had a daughter was news to him. Why had she never told him? Did she not trust him? It seemed to Jungkook that the fact she had a child was relevant information to share. After all, she had known all about him.
For a moment he worried, but then something else overtook him. Had everyone lied to him? Was he just some monster that no one trusted? If she kept that information, what else had she kept? The entire day he seethed, never once getting up and out of his bed, his heart troubled and mind overcome. Late into the night, sleep finally came, but not before he made himself a promise. Everyone that came into his life from now on would pay...pay for the sins of their ancestors before them.
It was the next morning when Jungkook’s eyes opened suddenly, his heart leaping into his throat at the sound of dishes being moved around. Had he dreamt all of it? Running to the small window where he received his food, he slid open the limited gap that prevented him from affecting anyone on the other side. Calling out her name in hopes that it really had been a nightmare, he gets no response. What he does see are a pair of smaller, younger looking hands sliding a bowl through filled with his favorite porridge. It smelled exactly like the one she used to make him and for a moment he watched confused.
The sliding door was at the height of his knees so he couldn’t meet the eyes of the other person, but from what he could see….this was not his old maid. He waits as your hands pull back and unable to keep silent any longer, he calls out, his voice brittle and broken. “Wait! P-Please...who are you?”
There is no answer, but of course he wasn’t expecting there to be. Who would speak to a demon like him? The little window closes leaving his bowl mid way to his side of the slot. Placing his hands over the rounded bottom of the ceramic bowl, he pulls it in and inhales sharply, his stomach growling at the memory of the delicious food before him. He begins to eat, all too consumed with the meal before him to even wonder about the person on the other side, and you were there still, he knew it. The caregiver assigned to him was always to stay the entire day from dawn to dusk, that was the rule.
As his day went on, he heard the rustling sounds on the other side, your actions mimicking those of the older caregiver making him wonder if he was suffering some horrible joke. You behaved just like your mother and it was starting to mess with his mental stability. Just as before, his meals came on time, the quality made for a royal prince, and just as delicious if not more than his ex-caregiver. He wondered how long it would be before you ran away in fear of the prince known in all the kingdom as a cursed evil being.
He was surprised your mother hadn’t told you that he was cursed. Why else would you be here? Surely not of your own accord? Then again, he shouldn’t be that surprised when he himself had never been told of the stranger in his tower by her either.
His belly full and his curiosity spiked, he dared attempt conversation once again, only needing to be acknowledged once. “I’m thirsty.”, he lied. He had no need of any beverage, as prince he had everything he needed. Before your mother had died, she made sure to stock him up with everything he wanted, always spoiling him beyond what was acceptable. Shaking off the sudden reminiscence, he waited for you to respond.
The only return he got was a glass of clean water being pushed through in a rush. Before you could pull back, he managed to grab your hand, keeping you from leaving. A small gasp escaped you and Jungkook’s body broke out in goosebumps. Your voice sounded fragile, soft, and sweet...a sound he doesn’t remember ever hearing before. Unsure if he would hurt you, he panics and lets your hand go, a bit embarrassed by how quickly you pulled away and shut the door on your side of the hole. He could still hear you breathing however, your chest probably heaving faster than your corset allowed for the intake of oxygen to enter your lungs.
His hand burned, yet there was nothing visible on his skin. What was this? The rest of the day went by quickly, your new attempts at getting him his supplies more and more creative as you made sure never to leave yourself open to being touched again. He was amused by your stubbornness and determination to not encounter him once more. He knew people didn’t want to know him, but seeing it in action was something altogether entertaining. He doesn’t know why he thought to even touch you. What did he expect to accomplish? Pity? Conversation? A friend?
Before he knew it, you were gone, and he was left in his thoughts. You obviously knew about him, why else would you have withdrawn your hand the way you did? It didn’t matter to him suddenly, the thought of a young woman tending to him now the main distraction. He doesn’t remember what it was like to associate with someone his age. Were you even his age? How old had the caretaker been? Were you younger or older? From the look and feel of your hands….your soft skin…
Lost in thought over you, he pauses realizing he’s aroused. A simple touch, so foreign, yet so exciting, was all it took to keep him from falling asleep. Imagining what you might look like, he decides to do what he knows would help him reach his slumber quicker. Grabbing the pillow by his side, he slides it between his thighs and begins to rut against the silk fabric. His tip was already sensitive, the entire day’s curiosity over the existence of a young female keeping his senses on high alert. As he thrust into it, pressing it against himself eagerly, he became aware that his ex-nanny would no longer be the one cleaning this pillow for him...no….you would be...and the thought thrilled him all the more. Turning so that the pillow was now under him, he pulled his long cotton pajama up over his hips in order to have better access to the soft sensation of the material below him. Rolling his hips slowly, he revels in the motions, quietly whimpering into his closed fist, imagining it to be the hands of the women who now haunted his thoughts.
In no time he was shuddering, extremely embarrassed that he had cum so quickly. He’d played with himself enough times to understand how his body worked, his experience by his own hand helping him to hold back his orgasms in order to increase the pleasure, but the thought of a woman was something altogether too powerful even for him. His heart finally calming down, he turned onto his back and blew out a frustrated breath. If you were going to be his new keeper, he knew he'd have a lot more days of irritation ahead.
Placing the now soiled pillow into the laundry hole that his previous caregiver had installed for her to access the prince’s dirty clothes and bed covers, he smirks at the thought of what you might think when you saw it. You would clean it, it was your responsibility after all. If you were anything like your mother, you’d do your job perfectly and without question.
Getting back on his comfortable mattress, he laid back, a hand over his eyes as he pondered so many questions about the daughter he never knew about. Were you beautiful? As beautiful as your soft skin? Have you been trained to take care of him? Since when? Had you known all about him, yet he knew nothing of you? Eventually sleep overtook him, and that night he dreamed he saw your face…
PLEASE LEAVE ME FEEDBACK.<3 IT REALLY LETS ME KNOW WHETHER OR NOT YOU ENJOYED THE WRITING.
↳ All works are ©jkeuphoriadreamland
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An analysis on the strategy and characterization behind Dream’s canon weapons
I think Dream’s choice of weapons is very interesting. Each one provides insight into how he changes as a character and how intelligent he is at strategizing between fighting for and protecting others.
Staff and Shield
The first weapon Dream dawns with his new power is a staff. It’s his first act he takes against corrupted Nightmare, and many things are at play in this scene:
1. Dream doesn’t run away despite having already been badly beaten up by the angry villagers, and being overwhelmed by his new powers.
2. He takes a stand against a much greater, deadlier, vicious, and powerful opponent solely to protect the people who remain because he can’t stand to see the rest of them get hurt.
3. Dream doesn’t choose an offensive weapon because he’s still very much afraid of hurting his brother and has never fought someone before. He goes mainly on the defensive. At this point in his character, he’s never found fighting to be the answer to anything. He isn’t convinced hurting someone will help them. He would rather choose a defensive weapon then try to break through to the person he thinks is still his brother.
This is the starting point for his weapons. His staff (which can also be used to form golden barriers), is a defensive weapon. It’s an extension of his more pacifist way of thinking, when he’s younger and less experienced with fighting. It’s not a bad weapon and isn’t the sole thing that costs him the fight, it can still be wielded offensively, against Nightmare, but its main goal is to do minimal damage, and function as defence for his other forms of solving problems. He uses this weapon frequently even after his defeat with Nightmare, but as Dream grows older he learns when to use a more offensive approach, rather than solely being defensive.
Dream’s second weapon is his bow. This is the first change to a more offensive fighting style. It’s important to note he doesn’t shoot actual arrows with it, rather the arrows are made of positive energy and will not injure anyone that gets hit by them, other than Nightmare. This means he successfully created a long range weapon that only hurts the one person he mainly needs offence against. A long range weapon is extremely useful for him, as fighting close with Nightmare means he’ll be affected by Nightmare’s aura and become weaker, as well as be in the line of fire for his tentacles. His bow offers him the ability to damage his brother from a distance then escape without being at as high a risk as defending with his staff and barrier, and can quickly be reverted back into his staff if the opponent comes closer.
Dream’s knives are my favourite weapon for many reason. It’s important to immediately note Dream DOES NOT trade his other weapons for this one. Rather he simply add this weapon to the weapons he uses. He still uses his staff and bow more frequently. His knives are stated, by Joku, as strictly for dire situations. I interpret this as situations in which one has to be more aggressive with the opponent to avoid others getting hurt. (Think Nightmare or Killer).
We can also see from the drawing of him with him that he is much older when he gets them. Joku is very good at depicting Dream’s age through her art. He uses these knives when things get serious, when he’s fighting for his life and the life of others, where defence is no longer the best option. He does not use these knives whenever he meets someone dangerous. We can see Dream, over his time as a guardian, learns that sometimes a more offensive approach is more beneficial, but only when other options don’t work. He’s learning how to shift his response based on the situation, rather than solely lean on pure talking, pure defence, or pure attack. If an enemy refuses to listen, if they are putting your life and the life of others in immediate jeopardy, you can’t stand around and try to talk to them, you have to take a different approach, and that’s exactly what his knives are for. He’s not sacrificing his kindness, he’s not using them to purposefully try to kill or hurt anyone, he’s using them strategically to meet a dangerous force with a stronger resistance.
From here, I’d like to talk about the design of the knives, because they resemble a very real world example: falchions.
Important note: never have the knives been stated as falchions, I simply am drawing comparisons between the two due to their similarities in design .
Falchions were small one handed, single edged swords. They’re very thin, light, and were designed to be good at quickly slashing. Because they’re one handed, they could be double wielded like Dream does. This is the perfect type of weapon for Dream. He needs to be fast and efficient against Nightmare, while the ability to wield two at once means he has a better chance of defending against Nightmare’s tentacles (which as shown in the comics, usually get reduced to two when fighting Dream because of Dream’s positive energy). The bow string that connects the two blades ensures he quickly recover one if it falls, so long as he’s holding the other. He has created the perfect weapon for combatting Nightmare, demonstrating his intelligence and ability to strategize, as well as representing his maturity, responsible nature, and ability to adapt to different situations.
Overall, I just really like all of Dream’s weapon choices :)
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Hi! I love your characterization of kuroo! Do you have any hcs about him lately ...? :))
Yeah! I love him very much! I consider him very mature for his age, even at around 8 when he already knew “if Kenma wanted to go out to soccer with me, even a little, I’d take him. but I don’t think he wants to.” I sometimes wonder if he grew up a little too fast, considering it’s somewhat implied he didn’t really want to move homes in the following dialogue.
In the HQ guidebook, it states he has an older sister. Yet in the manga, Kenma very clearly states there’s 4 in his home- his dad and his grandparents. This is pure speculation, but I think his parents separated, with his mother taking his older sister with her. That would explain some of the behaviours he exhibited in the flashbacks, like being hesitant to come out of his shell and looking kind of uncomfortable. We see him acting a lot more extroverted once he picks up volleyball and gains new friends, which makes me think his initial shyness was caused by an outside factor rather than something more intrinsic to his personality.
This is just my own headcanon, but I think maybe Kuroo sleeps with his pillow pressed against his head like that because he often heard arguments within the family as a kid. Maybe it’d make more sense if he grew out of it during high school, but I think it’s a possibility.
I also think Kuroo is one of the most emotionally intelligent characters in the series, along with Hoshiumi and Kita. I think he’s also the one with the most “people skills”, combined with that. I think it’s translated well into his job at the volleyball association, considering the need for high communication skills for many audiences and making connections. He’d be good at pacifying annoying higher ups and smoothing things out for the interests of his employers and whatnot.
An interesting aspect of him is how he handles things before and after the match with Nohebi. He’s shown to be the most immature when bickering with Daishou, maybe they knew each other during elementary school? But even then he does humble himself a bit, saying “Huh? We were totally gonna go for championships... But we did lose, so I’ll shut up.” And him calling out some random players talking some crap about Nohebi really hooked me, because he must be totally pissed at them for the stuff they pulled, but he’ll stick up for them and give credit where it’s due.
It seems he handles social situations by stating something positive first, in many cases. Like telling Kenma “I don’t hate your style of taking up a fight if it’s offered” before telling him he’ll be spending quite some time with Yamamoto. And saying “I don’t hate that about you” to Lev after he gets depressed after a loss and starts ranting about how he wants to be praised by the audience, before telling him the glory of ~teamwork~. Even when lecturing the randos talking crap about Nohebi, he starts by agreeing “arent their blocks so annoying”? He definitely has awareness of impressions he leaves on others. He may be good at provoking others, but he definitely knows how to pacify situations, and apologizes to Daichi after seemingly stepping on Tsukki’s landmine.
I could talk about Kuroo all day but here’s some thoughts I have about him! I can always write more about him if anyone wants me to.
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New fic *test*
New Bio!dad Bruce story? I’m testing out this first chapter, and if I like where it’s going I might add it to my growing pile of WIPs. If I have inspiration, I might as well use it. Because of life events stressing me the hell out, I’m throwing any writing plans out the window and I’m purely gonna write to destress right now. Whether that means updating THG or not, or continuing Maribat March, we’ll just have to see how this all pans out. Things are subject to day-to-day change.
I got inspiration from this from rereading my day 1 story for Bio!dad Bruce Wayne month from last year. I’m just gonna change a few things.
For once, an unfamiliar face attracted the attention of everyone who caught even a glimpse of them. It wasn’t even because of the person themselves at first, but their dress. The skirt like the most fantastical of storybook ball gowns, fluffy layers of satin over a luxurious petticoat, with a stunning pink floral pattern whose busy appearance was tastefully offset by a shorter, sheer layer of leaf green tulle artistically weaved and somehow sculpted over the floral in order to tame it. The effect turned what should be a grandmotherly pattern into something softer, sophisticated and youthful and yet also reminiscent of fairytale princesses. Over top the short layer of green tulle was an even shorter later of white tulle, almost invisible except for the elegant embroidery of crystal-white vines that twined all over it, connecting the green below it to the bottom-most floral pattern and oddly adding a layer of childishness instead of maturity. At the waist of the dress was a dark plum pink satin ribbon, to separate the elaborate ballgown skirt from the bodice. Attached to the simple ribbon was a large brooch of fabric flowers, with a single plastic ladybug in the center.
The bodice of the dress came up into a cheongsam neckline, but was sleeveless. It was a simple design, of half green and half dark pink, with a white border separating the two. The white border had expertly done embroideries in a soft silver thread that would only be visible close up, the images the thread made being that of fairies and ladybugs dancing around one another.
It was, all in all, a stunning display that made the small eurasian woman wearing them look like absolute royalty. Perhaps a long lost fairy princess. Her black-blue hair was even done up in elaborate looping braids and a braided bun, with silver and green pins that further completed the regal ensemble. And yes, while the expertly done dress was what initially captivated her current audience, it was not what kept them from leaving her alone. That was all her personality, bubbly and bright as her blinding smile. It was a sunny disposition that very few people present had any exposure to at all, and it drew them like a sunflower to the daylight. They could not help but flock closer, or even just stand back and keep themselves turned to her presence. Already she had been at the gala for two hours, but there was no issue. She just kept proving her generosity, admitting she had donated both a dress and a suit of her own making to the charity auction that would begin soon, one of the main attractions of the gala. She skillfully charmed the more snooty of the attendants, and artfully twisted her words so that they felt compelled to donate more money that they truly had no use for. Later, they would remember their donation and wonder what compelled it, but come up with no satisfying answer.
And yet she was entirely unaware of her more silent audience, who stood back and observed. Truth be told, every one of them was glad to not be the center of that attention for a change, to have room to breathe for so long at an event where usually that commodity was so scarce that it demanded a fierce competition for. Compared to her garden of color, they were all shadows in shades of blacks and blues and whites, with a touch of red here and there that was entirely too thematic for their home city. The one who sported a royal blue suit tilted his head at the scene they were all calmly witnessing, his bright azure eyes glittering.
“She’s like magic,” he mused, clearly enchanted despite having not said a single word to the woman. “Perfect socialite. She’s kind, generous, she made that dress and the ones she donated to the auction herself so she’s obviously got an intimidating amount of skill for her age. She even tricks those old fuddy-duddies into spending money. It’s like a dream come true!”
“I don't trust it,” the one to his right said, a man just a few inches shorter in a classic black suit with a red dress shirt underneath. He absently swept his bangs away from his face as he narrowed his eyes at the woman. “It seems too perfect. She doesn’t have any identifiable character flaw, except maybe being a little clumsy and too energetic. She does babble a little… but nothing that actually suggests any depth besides her just being— good. That’s impossible, and I don’t trust it.”
“Tt. I agree with Drake for once. She seems entirely too comfortable with this setting, despite her blushes and rambles,” the one who spoke this like was taller, clearly a teen in the middle of his growth spurt. He, too, wore a plain black suit but his had subtle charcoal embroidery and he wore an emerald-green dress shirt under it that made his matching eyes gleam dangerously. “It seems almost playacted. Expertly so, but nonetheless not entirely genuine.”
“Wow, not many pick up on that. I’m gonna give your observations a solid eight out of ten. They’re all perfectly sound, but not quite complete,” a new voice made all of the silent group stiffen— somehow they had been snuck up on. The newcomer smirked at them as if having fully expected their reaction but still being pleased at being able to evoke it. This was yet another stunner; far too much color in her outfit to be a Gotham native, and far too much skill in the construction for it to signify anything less than extreme influence. She had bright golden-blond hair that was coiled into a low bun, with her bangs artfully curled and arranged to display her crystal blue eyes.
In contrast to the garden-themed dress of the Eurasian woman who had garnered their attention at first, this newcomer was wearing a pantsuit. It was all in a dark honey-gold, in a stiff fabric with construction that made it lay entirely in perfect, straight lines and hug her form in the right places. Black embroidery decorated the long, flared sleeves and pant legs and dripped around the square neckline like a faux necklace. A cape made out of the same material as the rest of the pantsuit was draped on one shoulder. It started out as the same honey-gold color, but it became a gradient as it faded to a solid black at the ends. Gold thread embroidery decorated the solid black bottom of the cape in delicate, deceptively simplistic swirls. The top half of the pantsuit was clearly inspired by military garb, simultaneously rigidly constructed yet fitted, with circular onyx buttons going down the center of the chest and a thick metal belt, all in swirling silver and black, sat perfectly clasped around her waist. It was far more solid-colored and simplistic compared to the fairytale dress in the center, but no less show stopping and luxurious. It simply showcased an entirely different attitude, almost as if the two women could never get along if their personalities matched their outfits.
“And who are you?” The man who had been the center of the group of shadow-like adults spoke up, back straightening to milk every speck of his generous six-feet-and-three-inches of height. This was none other than Bruce Wayne, the host of this annual charity gala. And normally, his current stance would either intimidate or utterly charm whoever it was directed at— but not this pantsuit-clad blond warrior. Her smirk merely widened, and her blue eyes took on a slight shade of teal as if trying to mimic the dangerous ocean depths.
“I am Chloe Bourgeois, the daughter of Andre Bourgeois, the mayor of Paris, and Audrey Bourgeois, the Style Queen. It’s nice to meet you again, Monsieur Wayne,” she introduced herself imperiously. “I also happen to be the best friend of the girl you were just staring at.”
Bruce nodded, but had trouble reconciling this clear powerhouse of a woman with the bratty and entitled preteen he had met years ago, at the last gala she had attended with her mother. “Of course, I didn’t recognize you at first Chloe. You’ve grown a lot since the last Gala I saw you at.”
Chloe wrinkled her nose, clearly not appreciating the reminder. “I was a bitch,” she admitted easily, seemingly not at all bothered by the confession. It caused not only Bruce but also the oldest three of his sons, who had all also met her in the past, to blink in silent shock. “Things have changed. Paris is apparently the perfect chaotic environment right now to promote emotional growth and smack spoiled kids over the head with reality,” she shrugged. Part of the reason her and her whole class had even been able to come to the Gala in the first place was the fact that Bruce wanted to offer the most attacked group of Parisians a respite and some support from their crazy lives. The fact that even Gotham seemed sane in comparison to Paris was a bit of a hard hit for both involved parties, but in the end everyone understood that “more sane” didn’t always equate with “less dangerous.” Considering all that, Chloe had no reason to sugarcoat the situation in her home city. “But it wasn’t easy at all, and Marinette was largely responsible for my improvement too.”
“Marinette?” The heathen who somehow got away with attending a gala in a black leather jacket over a dress shirt and suit pants asked, raising a brow. Chloe nodded.
“The girl you were just goggling at. Marinette Dupain-Cheng, the class president and resident workaholic. Does she ever sleep? Nobody knows,” Chloe shrugged.
The blue-suited man, Dick Grayson, shot a suspicious glance at Tim, who was standing to his right, as if he was worried his brother had made a female clone of himself just so he could continue to work hard and never rest. Tim ignored him and sipped from the thermos of coffee he had somehow snuck in.
Bruce cleared his throat to bring the focus back onto himself, and shot his most charming smile at Chloe. “They would have known who she was, if they had read the brief information I gave them about your class. But they never do listen to me,” he complained with good humor. “But back to the original topic, Miss Bourgeois, do you care to correct us on how our observations are lacking?”
Chloe laughed easily, smiling and nodding to indicate Marinette, still stuck in a circle of socialites and not seeming the least bit worn out.
“Of course. First; She is not completely acting. She really is like magic sometimes— disgustingly kind, generous, far too willing to help just about anyone for just about any reason. She’s one of the best people I’ve ever met, as much as it pains me to admit it. But she is exaggerating her personality a bit and hiding the parts she doesn’t want anyone to see, so there is a little acting involved. Just not as much as you seem to think,” Chloe then waved her arm in a flourish as if she were presenting Marinette to them. “In short; behold Mari Dupain-Cheng, the ridiculously likeable, disgustingly cute, extremely philanthropic mask that she shows everyone at public events like this. You don’t see any of the insomnia, or the anxiety, or the self doubt. Just the parts she wants you to see, accompanied with a smile to blind you to everything else,” her all-too-deep blue eyes settled back on Bruce then, a knowing glint shining in them. “Don’t you think that’s ridiculously similar to Brucie Wayne for you, Monsieur? Utterly, ridiculously, similar?”
Bruce grit his teeth. He hadn’t expected anyone else to know about his exceptionally well hidden secret, not even his kids had caught on or found his buried evidence yet. Yet his heiress comes up, nearly flaunting her knowledge in his face with all too many unspoken questions and criticisms.
And her cryptic words had succeeded in making all of his kids look at him with extreme suspicion. Shit.
“What are you saying, Miss Bourgeois?” he cautiously prodded. She hummed noncommittally before dropping the bomb all too casually;
“I’m saying I’ve seen her adoption papers, and you won’t be able to run from her for long Monsieur Wayne. As soon as she gets an opening, she’s going to pounce,” Chloe’s eyes glittered dangerously again. “And nowadays, Marinette doesn’t ever let people escape her. Your problem with adoption has created a rather unique problem, you know. You’re at fault for a large majority of her self confidence issues, and I want you to know that I am not going to forget or forgive that anytime soon.”
“Bruce,” Jason’s voice was dark and threatening. “What is she talking about?”
“Something we don’t want getting in the tabloids,” Yet another new voice popped up, allowing Chloe to smugly sink back into the background.
Somewhere during their discussion, Marinette had ambushed them.
“Chloe and I are very good at locating all the reporters in a room and distracting them, but we’re not infallible and this event has far too much coverage,” Her smile reeked confidence and charm, but this close all the Waynes could see the doubt hiding in her bluebell eyes. “Since I’m about to turn eighteen, I figured this would be as good a time as any to finally confront you. I want to make it clear that I seek nothing from you, except the occasional contact. I would like to keep in touch, if nothing else. But if you are adverse to that… then at least answer my questions after the gala,” her eyes developed a hint of carefully controlled desperation. “Please.”
Bruce met her eyes evenly, trying to read her. But she was difficult, simultaneously too many emotions to sort through in her demeanor and much too little. After an extremely tense moment of silence, his voice came out barely above a whisper:
“You do not want anybody to know?”
And hell, if she didn’t recognize the hidden vulnerability in his voice as the very same she heard in her own far too often. In a much tamer version of her own rambling, he went on:
“I can keep it silent if that is what you want. But I want you to know that I will not be adverse to you admitting it anywhere. I don’t expect you to change your name, but I would not be ashamed of the truth getting out. I am not ashamed of it, of you.”
Marinette’s smile grew a little watery. She had to clear her throat to keep herself from tearing up. “Maybe eventually, but not yet. I… I want to stay a little more anonymous for now. It’s one thing to be a well known designer with good connections. It’s an entirely different thing to be…”
“A Wayne?” Bruce finished, ignoring the daggers that were being stared into his back. “I understand completely.
“Father,” Damian’s voice was all sharp edges and rapidly suppressed panic. “What. Is going. On?”
Marinette shot him an apologetic smile. “Apparently, eighteen years ago, his prerogative was to put the child he actually knew about up for adoption when the mother died in childbirth,” her voice was once again only barely loud enough for them to hear, since she didn’t want any eavesdroppers. “Imagine my surprise when I find out he completely flipped sides only months later.”
Hey, so please share your feedback on this. This is just to test out a possible new bio dad, multichapter fic and this is the opening scene I'm trying out. If you like it, please tell me what you like about it and please suggest titles for the story! I love you guys' feedback so much!
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First let me doff my hat 🎩 to Shin HaEun for the masterclass in writing that Hometown Cha Cha Cha is proving out to be.
Every.Single.Female.Character in this drama is brilliant and growing by learning from their mistakes.
HyeJin is the rockstar of them all - so flawed, so real , makes mistakes, has prejudices, will accept her fault and make amends. She is also setting great examples - If you molest my friend, I will kick your face and strike at the police station till the pervert is punished. I will not let a scamster trick a fellow woman, and I will not let the police victimise the victim further. I will not hesitate to call out baseless gossip and people who harm my profession. I will dress up for myself, not for that misogynistic boyfriend of mine and won’t hesitate to dump that fool. I will stand up for my man against my father’s prejudice and call his hypocrisy out.
Hwa Jeong is raising a great son in YiJun and doing everything she can to do right by her fellow village folks. She will call out NamSuk’s gossiping habit, but she will protect her tender heart that is healing from her little girl’s loss. She will not be afraid to attack the pervert who tried to harm her friend. She is so fearless , rarely shows her true emotions but is extremely caring and grateful towards DuSik for his grandfather’s help.
NamSuk is hurting and healing , and while she will add the fun and flair to the gossip on the chat group, she is firmly protective of her friend Hwa Jeong. If you ever grab my friend’s wrist in anger I will smack the shit out of you - ex husband or not!
Pyo Mi-Seon is the best friend you need in your life. I will call out my friend on her face, make her see sense, straighten her, but if anyone else says one bad thing about her - I will defend her over my dead body! No one can hurt her - no one!
The halmeoni trio - Gam-Ri ( Who I have declared as the President of Shikye Fan club) , badass Mat-Yi and Soo-Ja. The backbone of that GongJim friends group. They raised little DuSik with love and absolutely dote over him, especially Gam-Ri. They misjudge HyeJin at first, but come around to love and care for her when they learn she lost her mom young. You would expect given the cultural biases held against orphans and kids with single parents - these conservative grandmoms would be judgemental? But they are the opposite, fiercely protective and loving of their precious Shikye couple. Bringing HyeJin calming pills after the attack and food for Dusik’s grandfather’s memorial service. Gam-Ri dropping truthbombs on DuSik to be honest to HyeJin about his feelings and Mat-Yi going ballistic on the rash driver who snapped at HyeJin. I love this trio 😍
Oh JuRi can be an infuriating teenager, but she loves her dad more than anything else. She is so mature for her age that she understands the pain he is going through raising her alone and wants him to lessen his own burden, just be the dad and not play mom. And she says the most beautiful thing that helps HyeJin take small steps toward accepting her own dad’s second marriage and her step-mom : Why should one spend their entire life missing a dead person, there is nothing wrong in them finding happiness again.
Bo-Ra is the bully in town, but loves and protects her friend YiJun and is so,so proud of him! This pure hearted soul - who can’t stop crying cause she knocked out his front tooth and whose only aim after winning the singing talent show is use to the prize money to play games with YiJun. She is sorted and she is a keeper and YiJun you do not let go of her for the rest of your life!
And lastly HyeJin’s StepMom who stole my heart from scene one. She is fully in support of DuSik, straightens her husband and is a kind-hearted soul. She wants HyeJin’s acceptance, but doesn’t grudge her for not giving it nor forces it on her. She wants to bridge the gap between the father and HyeJin and wants them to be a family together. She is loving and kind and now with DuSik in the picture - I hope, I really hope, HyeJin finds in her the mother figure she has been craving in her life.
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Sangwoo x Reader
You and Sangwoo were like night and day. Way too different, both of you were intelligent but your personalities crashed hard.
While he was cold, you were bright, always with a smile, he was distant, you liked to be close to people. He never showed his true emotions, you were a open book.
Since kids both of you would fight a lot, for the smallest and most insignificant things.
You hated how he alwyas seemed to look for the "strongest" people to make up his team for the games as kids. Gi-hun was the one who kept both of you from getting into physical fights but sometimes both of you would end getting dirty as the others kids would call "fight fight!!"
College was another story. Even if you two matured more, still crashed. Sangwoo learned that you and Him would never pass the friendship stage (even if that was strong enought).
Your chats consisted in polites "hey" or asking how a class was going.
"If you keep being this late to class you will fail" Sangwoo gissed as he moved his backpack to a side for you to sit.
"Relax Sangwoo, besides who was the one who got the highest score last test?" You said in a playfull tone taking a the seat besides him.
"Yeah sure" you said with a smile starting to take notes.
"You need to stop smoking"
Maybe knowing each other from a young age and have to face college together helped your relationship to grow a bit.
Sangwoo helped you in a few classes and would save you a seat if you were late (you always were).
You would get him coffe for late nights study or pass hin your notes (he said once that yours were better but he denied that he ever said that).
If what took both of you to grew feelings for each other but never act on it.
You alwyas had someone with you, trying to full your heart but everytime you saw Sangwoo you would feel pain.
Sangwoo was almost the same story. Seeing you (apparently) happy with someone sparked a feeling of jealousy on him. Causing him to look for quick company and avoiding you for a while. But he stopped doing that, he decided not to screw up the friendship you both had over a "small" crush.
When you two graduated it was a bittersweet feeling. You promised him to keep in touch but Sangwoo decided to distance himself, after all you were (by what he heard around) going to marry your current partner. It hurted him a bit, he tought for sure, distance and removing you from his life would make it better.
It did not. You were on his mind from time to time, he was close to contact you but decided against it.
Then the Squid Game happened.
Sangwoo was angry, the first thing he did after see you was scol you like a child, while you were smiling at him he had not changed at all and that made you happy somehow.
Sangwoo was furious when he discovered that you were there because you ex-husband had used your name on some shady bussiness and now you were in debt.
And with a kid, alone.
If there was one person in this place that could make Sangwoo worried it was you. During riots he was by your side, in games he would keep an eye on you and help you more than the others.
One nights you asked to sleep besides him, he did not said yes right away, till he saw your pleading eyes.
He moved aside and you rested besides him. No one said a word till you started to cry in silence.
"Im going to lose my kid, if i dont get that prize social services will take him away from me" you said in tears. Then looked at him, he was looking down at you with an aching heart.
"Sangwoo, i dont know if im going to survive-
"You will" Sangwoo said in a firm voice. But you moved your head from side to side.
"Listen, if i dont make it, please Sangwoo, please take care of him"
Sangwoo felt thousands of emotions going into him, why would you ask him from all people to take care of your son?
"You dont know what you are saying, im not a good person to raise a kid"
At this you smiled, "dont you remember that one time? We went to the park for a break and a lost kid came to you, he was crying. You calmed him and helped him look for his parents. You smiled at him all the way and laughted at his stories about dinosaurs".
Now Sangwoo did remember that, it was a sunny day when one kid came to him. You were by his side, maybe that gave him courage to help the kid, somehow to prove to you how of a good partner he would be.
He also did remember how the mother had said that both of you would be good parents.
"You know, it was that day, i realised...i loved you Sangwoo, and still do".
Sangwoo's eyes opened wide, his hearbeat went up. Did you just said that you loved him? Him?
"(Y/n)...you cant be serious"
"No, im sure. I love you Sangwoo, i wish i told you sooner but, this would have to do"
You smiled again, it was a bit sad but also a bit happy. Sangwoo was blushing hard and thanked that the big room was all dark.
"Fucking hell" he said in a low voice, then he went down and kissed you. It was a soft kiss, totally different from the ones he had gave all his life.
Because if someone deservs this Sangwoo was you.
"Listen, we will make out. I promise you, i dont care what we need to know. You will see your son again and-
"And you will stay with me?"
"Yes, I will stay with you"
Sangwoo knew both of you were different from the time he crossed eyes with you as kids.
But with the pass of time, he realised that he needed you. He needed your bright smile and personslity in his life.
So, no matter the cost, or the how, both of you were getting out of here.
Tags: @mochacake2016 @maximumcoffeeme
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my heart goes kaboom for you | fred weasley
Pairing: Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader
Summary: Sitting in the reading room of your apartment above the shop, you reminisce about your husband, Fred Wealsey.
Word Count: 800+
Prompt: Sparklers & fireworks (flufftober day 4)
A/n: this was more of a metaphorical take on the prompt, so I hope this isn’t too underwhelming. Anyway, I hope you’re all enjoying flufftober so far! <3
find the flufftober masterlist here
• • • • • •
Just how to describe him….
Hot headed? Surely. A little reckless? More than a little, you think. Has an ego the size of Hogwarts? Possibly, though he has his good days. A touch over zealous? Yeah, maybe a touch. He’s likely all of these things, and yet he’s so much more: a son, a brother, a husband, and one day, a father.
And if there’s one thing you can say about Fred Weasley, it’s that his ego is earned. Since you first met him when he was eleven years old, until now at your ripe old age of twenty three, you’ve never seen him fail at anything. It’s like the man is incapable of being bad; he’s good at everything.
You’ve never met anyone so dedicated to their greatness, someone who knew from the second they stepped foot on this earth just the potential they had. And some might point to you and say, well, what about Harry Potter? And the thing is, you’ve known both Fred and Harry for what feels like your entire life, you grew up with them, and while they are similar, they have one stark difference. Harry might just be the greatest wizard you’ll ever encounter, but it was a greatness he never saw in himself, a potential he didn’t understand, and one that was forced upon him.
Fred’s greatness is something he seemed to always know he had, and it was a choice. He always wanted to be someone. He always wanted to make people laugh, to bring joy into the world. That doesn’t necessarily mean that it was always his dream to open the joke shop. In his mind, he didn’t exactly know how his motivations would precipitate, but the foundation was there. All he wanted was to make people happy.
So, you can say a lot of things about Fred Weasley, good and bad, because Merlin knows he’s a pain in your ass 99% of the time, but you can’t say he doesn’t burn bright. Because he does…so very bright…
It’s funny because he always calls you his sparkler, and him your firework. And it’s extremely fitting. You both have this hot streak in you, where if your backs are against the wall, you won’t hesitate to fight for what you believe in. And the nicknames run deeper than just the implication that your personalities are larger than life. They also signify the light you bring to each other. Fred is the brightest source of light, love, and liveliness in your life, and you are his.
It’s a loop you can get lost in again and again — thinking of Fred.
“Something on your mind darling?” Speak of the devil. Your husband’s voice is smooth and alluring, lulling your mind from its thoughts.
You look at him through your lashes, noticing his reading glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. They’re a recent addition to his wardrobe that make him look so mature, an aspect of Fred’s personality that has usually gone unnoticed. Because despite his child like persona, when he’s with you, when he doesn’t have to be this funny, charming guy, he’s just Fred, mature, rational, and sweet.
Your eyes pierce through the warm brown of his. “You.” You respond.
He flashes you a quick smile. “All good things I hope.”
“I’m afraid not my love.” You tease. “All terribly awful things.”
He’s so used to being the one doing the teasing that for a moment, he’s caught off guard. But only for a moment…
Fred’s eyebrows raise in curiosity, as he wiggles them slightly. “Naughty awful?” He asks hopefully.
“You wish Casanova.”
Your reply spurs a reaction out of Fred as he leans forward to press a haste kiss on your lips. “Always.”
It’s moments like this that remind you just how much you love him, and how much you know he loves you. It’s pure and undeniably real. It’s domestic, full of happiness and something you can always count on. And that’s probably what fills your heart with the most joy — Fred’s love for you and your love for him is reliable. It’s the kind of stability most people dream of having.
From the time you were eleven years old, you knew he would always be there for you…and you for him.
So yes, you can say a lot of things about Fred Weasley, some good and some bad, but there’s one thing you know for certain: he’s the firework to your sparkler. Forever and always.
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Lucid | NCT Dream ‘00 Line x Reader
Lucid Dreams - a type of dream wherein the person is aware that he or she is caught in a dream world.
Summary: It was supposed to be a harmless, professional transaction. You were to tutor a group of boys, get your pay at the end of the day, and go home to your loving fiance. Kids aren’t supposed to be dangerous, right? So why, then, are you caught up in a web of madness that slowly makes you feel like you’re in a living nightmare?
A/N: So... I saw the NCT horror nights post and got inspired. I know I shouldn’t have started a new story but I’m too weak and just had to write this down. T.T. This is a yandere plot featuring NCT Dream '00 line and Reader--that means there will be mature themes in the story as well as obsessive, toxic behavior. If you’re a minor, I would appreciate it if you could refrain from interacting. If this isn’t your thing, then just scroll and skip. In no way am I condoning anything written here, nor do I think that any of the people mentioned here will act any way like in this story. This is purely a work of fiction.
Other than that, enjoy! It’s my first time trying this genre, so as usual, feedback is highly appreciated. Do let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for this!
Genre: yandere, horror, suspense
TW: abuse, obsessive behavior, toxic relationships, suggestive scenes, stalking, possible kidnapping, mental health. Age gap--though nothing dramatic. Everyone is of legal age. Creepy, creepy, creepy! This will be updated as the story goes along.
Footsteps resounded across the hallway, light yet excited in their pace. A door was flung open, sending Jaehyun to look up from the book he was reading in mild surprise. It was a gift that he has lightning fast instincts as he caught you just in time as you launched yourself into his arms.
"Jae! I got it! I got it!" You squealed as you wrapped your arms around his neck, face burrowed against his chest. He moved his arms to your waist to keep you from toppling over his lap.
"That's great. What did you get, baby?" He asked patiently, his dimpled smile showing. You moved over to grin at him before showing him a piece of paper.
"I got the job over at Rosewood Manor! For the private tutor post!"
"The one that pays a lot?"
"The one with the seven boys as your students?"
"Oh, that's great. Congratulations, honey," he said before leaning over to give you a kiss on the cheek. You swung your legs over to the side and let him pull you closely to him as you both looked over at the letter. You've only scanned it once so you took the chance to drink every word in it now that the initial shock was over. Jaehyun did the same, his eyes dancing across the cursive font there.
"Wow, they really sent you a handwritten one. Guess e-mail is too convenient for them, huh?"
You rolled your eyes and jokingly pushed him back, a slight smile on your lips.
"Stop being sarcastic. They are pretty traditional."
"So I've heard."
The job was simple. In fact, it sounds a little bit too good to be true when you first stumbled upon it in the newspaper. The manor was looking for a private tutor for seven boys, all between 19 and 21 years of age. It was a short-term post, with the contract running for six months, but "candidates who prove to be a perfect fit" can be given a longer term according to the job ad. You remember your eyes almost popping from your sockets when you saw the five figure salary being offered at the bottom of the page. Not only is the compensation way beyond the market price, the figure there was also payment for each month of the contract.
Long story short, you scrambled to fix your portfolio that day and sent your application over.
That was almost a month ago. To be honest, you weren't expecting to hear back from them at all. It's not that you weren't qualified—in fact, you believe you are the perfect fit for it, having just finished your masters in Education. Given the more than ideal offer, however, you know that dozens of others also sent their applications over so the competition must be high.
Apparently, you didn't have to worry too much about that as you grinned proudly again at the letter you are holding now.
Jaehyun leaned over and rested his chin on your shoulder, his eyes still on the piece of paper. There was a logo embossed on it, an R and W intertwined by what looks like rose bushes.
"I still don't understand why you chose this over the Junior Instructor post at the uni," he said, making you turn around slightly to him. You gave a soft sigh and kissed his temple.
"We've already talked about this. The offer is amazing—everything I could ever want, but you know it, Jae. The pay doesn't really reflect the post."
"It's not too bad."
"It isn't. But I have loans to pay, and our wedding is coming soon next year."
He shifted you slightly over his lap.
"I already told you, you don't have to worry about anything when it comes to our wedding," he said in a gentle voice. You knew he was being careful with his words since this is one subject you have always been a little sensitive about. You sighed, hand running over his hair.
"And I also already told you that I am not making you pay for everything. I'm going to shoulder my share, as I should."
To say that Jaehyun is loaded would be insulting his background. He comes from old money, his family being a well-established name in the city for owning almost a quarter of the businesses there. Even until now, there are moments when you wonder how and why he fell for you, with your own family background entirely being the opposite of his. While he was raised with love, you jumped from foster home to foster home until you were old enough to live on your own. While he was treated as a prince, served with anything and everything he wanted, you lived the life of a pauper, working day by day just to survive.
Still, he accepted and loved you for who you are, and for that, you are incredibly grateful.
You cupped his cheek now and gave it a kiss.
"Just let me do this, okay? It's only for six months anyway."
He sighed, but gave you a smile after.
"Fine. You have to be careful though. There's a lot of rumors about that family."
"Yeah. They said nobody really lasts there since the kids are all weird. They don't also go out in public that much for some reason."
"Mm...I don't know. Sounds like people just make these stories about them because they're not social butterflies," you took one more look at the paper before folding it away.
"We'll see, I guess."
You felt Jaehyun's arms wrap a little bit tighter around your waist.
"Just be careful, okay? They're still men."
You laughed and threw him a teasing glance.
"Are you jealous?" You asked, to which he only answered with a playful pout. You giggled again and booped his nose.
"Jae, they're kids."
"Kids can be scary."
"Yeah, they sure can be."
They sure can be.
You were in the middle of trying to fold the left sleeve of your white button down when you realized that it’s the third time in the last five minutes that you’ve tried to fix it. With a frustrated sigh, you forced yourself to lean back against your car seat, your eyes finding the building in front of you again. You've been sitting by your car for the past five, seven minutes and your heater was barely doing its job to keep you warm in the cramped space. You don't know what it is with you today, but you feel like a bundle of nerves. You are definitely not the type to be easily nervous, so you find it quite odd that you are acting this way right now. Biting your inner cheek, you quickly glanced at your watch, then at the manor in front of you again.
8:46 AM. You still have quite a while before your 9:30 appointment. It was your first day at work so you didn't want to be late, but now you're half regretting your decision as the mansion loomed over you like a ghostly sentinel.
Don't get it wrong, the place is wonderful. Majestic. Made of stone with sections stretching on its side, you can assume it doesn't have no less than ten rooms with how big it is. A garden took the right side of the vicinity, while an expansive field was to the left, opening into the outskirts of the woods. You guess this is quite normal for such an out of the way address from the busy center of the city, but you're still quite overwhelmed.
You sighed, your breath turning into vapor in front of you. It's the start of winter and the season is already turning out to be one of the worst Seoul has seen so far. With one last look at your reflection in the mirror, you grabbed your coat and bag to alight from your car.
Better be early than late, you told yourself.
You made quick steps to the front door, a pair of oak doubles that have Victorian-looking knockers on them. You grabbed one and banged it a few times, hoping someone answers it fast before you freeze to death outside. For the meantime, you shifted from your left foot to the right, doing a small dance to distract yourself from the chill.
The door opened not long after and you were met by a man with light rose-colored locks and huge, dark brown eyes. He was wearing what looked like a butler outfit, but instead of the usual dark coat, he had an apron over his well-pressed button down and trousers. He blinked at you a few times and you offered a smile, teeth chattering from the cold.
"H-Hi. I'm the—the new tutor," you said before offering a polite bow. That seemed to have brought him back to reality, as he immediately moved to the side to make way for you.
"Oh, I'm so sorry! Please, come in."
You heaved a relieved sigh as he closed the door behind you. Warmth immediately wrapped your shivering form as if you stepped into an entirely different world.
"We weren't expecting you this early. Have you been waiting outside too long?"
You turned to look at the man who welcomed you, this time giving him a real good look. He looks about the same age as you, maybe just a year or two older, tops. You couldn't help but notice how good-looking he is, too.
"No. Not at all. I was sitting by my car. I'm sorry, I was worried the roads here would be blocked by the snow so I drove here early."
"That is fine," he answered, the smile on his lips making his big brown eyes twinkle. He offered his hand and you quickly took it, hoping he wouldn't flinch with how cold yours is.
"I'm Lee Taeyong. I'm the butler and caretaker here at Rosewood. It's nice to meet you."
You offered your own name and gave him a firm shake of your hand.
"Nice to meet you. I'm excited to work here."
The smile he gave you in return to what you said was charming. Was it just your imagination though when you thought something else flickered from the depth of his eyes? You could have seen what it is, but the emotion was gone too fast like an illusion.
"Likewise. The boys are very excited to meet their new teacher. They just finished their breakfast though so they've retreated back to their rooms," he said as he let go of your hand. He then untied his apron from the back, leaving it by a coat hanger by the door. He made a gesture for your own jacket and you quickly took it off before handing it to him with a soft thank you.
"They'll be ready in a few minutes. Why don't I give you a quick tour of the house first?"
"Oh… yes. Sure," you said, shifting your bag to your shoulder. Taeyong walked towards what you can assume is the main lobby of the manor and you quickly followed, eyes roaming the house.
If the place looked stunning on the outside, it is definitely breath-taking from the inside. It's like one of those mansions that jumped out of a storybook with its high ceilings and polished walls adorned by works of art that either looked dated or expensive. Everything screamed of old money, from the lush rugs, down to the ornate candle holders resting on marble mantels.
Taeyong was in the middle of touring you around the art room when a painting caught your attention. It was still half finished, but you can make out the silhouette of a woman on the canvas.
"Who made this?"
Taeyong walked over to stand beside you and smiled as he regarded the artwork.
"That's by Huang Renjun, the second brother. He is a talented artist, if I might say so."
"It's beautiful…" you whispered as your eyes followed the graceful curves of the painting. The woman has her hands up, as if surrendering to an unknown force. It looked poetic...almost...seductive.
You suddenly turned to look at Taeyong then as something about what he said finally clicked.
"Wait, Huang? I thought the boys are all Korean?"
Taeyong leaned his head a bit to the side.
"Oh no. Only five of them are. Two are from China."
The look of confusion on your face must have been so obvious because it earned you a chuckle from him. The butler clasped his hands behind his back before speaking again.
"I was about to explain it later once you meet all of them, but I guess it wouldn't hurt if I tell you now. There are seven brothers all in all, all of which have been adopted by the former master and mistress of this house. They all came from different orphanages but they all grew up together."
You slowly nodded as you took that piece of information in. Little is known about the heads of this family to the public other than the fact that they are incredibly rich. If Jaehyun is old money, this lineage was supposed to be tenfold of that.
"So their parents…"
"They unfortunately passed away five years ago. Car crash," Taeyong said, a reverent tone on his voice.
"Oh...I...didn't know that. Sorry."
"That's fine. The boys were definitely shaken by it since they used to be such a close-knit family, so it was decided that they take on homeschooling. And here you are now."
You smiled, though there was a heavy feeling on your chest that you couldn't quite place. You definitely weren't expecting this kind of family history. For the sake of your own sense of curiosity, you wanted to know more.
"Who is taking care of them now then?"
"Oh, everything is being managed by the eldest and me."
"So technically...I report to you."
The smile Taeyong gave you was dazzling but kind.
"No you don't. I'm the one who made the job post, but I trust that you definitely know more about what you should do. I trust you."
You smiled back at him. Well, at least you have a very understanding boss.
"Just to let you know though, you may need to adjust your lessons a bit since they are at different levels. You don't have to worry too much about Mark since he just finished his studies, though he might ask you for some help in learning other things he takes interest in. Renjun, Jeno, Jaemin, and Haechan are all the same age. They're preparing for their qualifying exam for college. Then you have Chenle and Jisung who are both 19."
You nodded, making a strict mental note about that piece of information. It's a good thing that one of your specializations is general education, it'll come in handy for this case. Just then, two boys walked into the room, deep in conversation.
Taeyong softly cleared his throat to get their attention. The duo turned to look at him before their eyes settled on you.
You took note of their appearances, a habit that comes naturally to you because of your profession. One had wavy hair that fell over his round, innocent-looking eyes while the other had jet black locks with wisps of blonde accenting it. Just one look at them and you could tell how they're not blood-related. One was taller and the other had a softer look to him.
"Mark, Renjun, this is your new tutor."
You saw surprise register on their faces. You offered them a warm smile before bowing politely.
"Hello, it's nice to meet you."
They both kept quiet even as you straightened back, waiting for their reaction. Mark had a curious look on his eyes while Renjun stared at you, almost expressionless.
You glanced at Taeyong, wondering silently if this is normal.
"I...uh. You're the one who is making this painting, right? It's beautiful," you offered, gesturing towards the canvas in front of you. You figured you needed to say something to break the ice.
And just like that, Renjun's expression changed. There was the initial shock that fluttered across his pretty features before it settled into a flustered look. He turned his eyes away and you could swear that you could see a shade of light pink dusting his cheeks.
That seems to be the nudge that Mark needed to make his own move. He grinned upon seeing his brother's embarrassed state before giving you a nod.
"Hey, it's nice to meet you."
Taeyong took that as a sign to leave. He gave you one last smile before turning to Mark, his hand briefly resting on the younger boy's shoulder.
"Well then, I'll leave the rest of the introductions to Mark here. I still have things to do in the kitchen," the two exchanged a look that you couldn't quite decipher before Mark smiled and nodded back.
"She's all yours," Taeyong said so softly that you almost didn't catch it before walking off.
Your gaze followed the retreating back of the man before turning towards the duo in front of you again. This time, Renjun was back to staring at you, his eyes drilling into yours. Your smile faltered just a little bit. You couldn’t help but notice the different glint resting on their depths...dull...unreadable, but there.
Softly, you cleared your throat to break the tension.
"So, do you think I can meet the rest of your brothers?" You asked, eyes moving between the two. Mark glanced at his watch before giving a nod.
"Yes. I think they're all about ready now. Will there be lessons on the first day?"
You shook your head and smiled. "No, I thought it would be best to just get to know each other on our first day."
"Great. They'll love that. Come on then, I think they're at the music room," Mark nodded his head towards the exit and turned on his heels to walk off. You started following him and had barely taken five steps when you almost jumped at the feeling of a hand sliding over yours. You looked up in shock to see Renjun beside you with a serene look on his face. He slowly interlocked his fingers with yours before pulling you gently.
"Let's go. They're waiting," he said simply.
You didn't know how to react so you wordlessly followed him, gaze switching between him and Mark. The latter, unfortunately, didn't spare you another glance as he continued leading the way towards the maze of corridors. Meanwhile, your heart has started beating harder against your ribcage.
It was just hand-holding...something innocent, maybe even childish if you think about it, but your gut was still sending you warning signs that made you want to pull away. Maybe it's because Jaehyun is the only one who has ever held your hand that way...or maybe, it's the way that Renjun's hold felt entirely different from your fiance’s.
It felt...intrusive. Almost possessive.
Unfortunately, you didn't get the chance to break from his grasp as your trio finally stopped in front of a set of doors. Mark turned the knob and pulled it open, revealing an expansive room that is almost twice as big as the art hall. One length of the wall was a glass window, covered by a curtain that allowed some frost-bitten daylight to spill into the room. A grand piano sat beside it while the other end of the room had a cluster of different other instruments—percussions, strings, bass, and a range of speakers. Scattered loosely in the center is a grand long couch and some love seats, now being occupied by four boys.
"Hey, everyone here?" Mark called out into the room, causing everyone to turn their heads towards your group's direction. Another boy appeared from sight from behind the piano and leaned against it in curiosity.
"I want you to meet our new tutor," Mark gestured towards you as Renjun gently pulled you closer so the others could see you better. You almost forgot he was still holding your hand. The eldest announced your name into the room but you barely heard it, not with the way everyone was looking at you.
If Renjun's hold made you uneasy, this is much worse. You couldn't put your finger on what is exactly wrong, but you felt uneasy, almost nauseous.
It felt like you've walked straight into a den of wolves.
"This is Jeno," you caught yourself just in time to hear Mark start to make the introductions. A boy with light blonde hair nodded at you from one of the love seats, his heavy-set eyes never leaving your face. You quickly moved your glance to settle on—
"That's Jaemin. And that's Haechan," Mark continued, gesturing towards a pair sitting by the main couch. One boy had silver hair that almost came down to his eyes while the other had dark brown locks that were artfully brushed up against his perfect forehead. You watched as his eyes moved from your face down to your interlocked hands with Renjun.
A ghost of a smirk played on the corners of his lips.
"Nice to meet you, noona."
"And then that is Chenle and Jisung. They're our youngest," Mark finished as you forced yourself to tear your eyes away from the others. Chenle, the one leaning against the piano, gave you a polite nod. Jisung, who was sitting by Jaemin's side, did the same. He looked the shyest of the five.
Silence settled over the room for a bit. Upon realizing that they were waiting for you to speak up, you quickly shook yourself and gave a bow of your own. You also used the chance to inconspicuously pull your hand from Renjun's hold.
"It's nice to meet all of you," you said casually, thankful that your voice was steady at the very least. When you looked up again, the boys looked almost different—angelic and normal under the light of the room. Were you just imagining the odd feeling that you got earlier? What's gotten into you?
Nevertheless, you offered the warmest smile you could muster at the moment.
"I'm so excited to work with all of you. Please take care of me," you said, your gaze touching each face in the room.
It was Haechan who answered, his tone light, airy, sweet.
"Oh, don't worry… We will."
"What do you think?"
Jaemin joined Renjun by the window covered by the thick curtains that shielded the manor from the outside world. The light in the sitting room where they stood was off, letting them blend into the darkness as they stared outside from the small crack between the blinds. Two pairs of eyes followed a lone form below as the person unlocked her car in a hurry.
Renjun watched as she gave one last look at the manor before finally alighting her car. The day was short, with her mostly sitting with them individually to plan about their future lessons, but it was enough for him, and the others, to make a decision.
The car pulled back from the driveway before disappearing down the road.
"She's perfect. In every way."
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Not So Big and Scary After All
Ushijima Wakatoshi - Haikyuu
Synopsis: college parties with your volleyball friends were always wild, but when the alcohol starts flowing and someone pulls out a pair of sex dice, things go from wild to hectic—and to make matters worse, you end up getting paired with a man who has a death glare that you're almost positive could actually kill
Warnings: sex dice, erotic foreplay-type actions, slight handjob, female!reader, female anatomy, male anatomy, m/m, m/f, alcohol, drunk shenanigans, exhibitionism-ish, aged-up characters
Read part 2 here →Not So Big and Scary After All Part 2
You weren't sure what time it was, exactly, but it was late and almost everyone at the party was somewhere on the scale of tipsy to plastered drunk.
If asked, nobody would be able to pinpoint who it was that had actually brought out the sex dice and suggested some 'adult fun', but with the inebriated states of you all and the usual habit of getting a little too comfortable with each other at parties, it wasn't surprising that there was a circle of people ready to participate minutes after the game had been mentioned.
"Okay, so how is this going to actually work?" Kuroo questioned. "Since there's like a group of us and sex dice are meant for couples."
A few heads swivelled as people looked to one another for an answer.
"We could make it like a competition," Hinata suggested. "Split off into couples and whichever couple is last to forfeit wins."
Everyone nodded, agreeing that Hinata's plan seemed to make the most sense. Plus, with these competitive men, making it so there was a winner and losers would guarantee a heightened sense of urgency to be the victor, thus creating more chaotic fun in the long run.
Looking around at the gathered group, you chuckled. "As long as everyone is okay with the possibility of pairing up with someone of the same sex because there is not an even number of men and women here."
Of course, that didn't faze anyone in the slightest. In fact, some of the guys had even started planning with their closest friend about how they would win as if this game could be won with some sort of strategy.
"Speaking of even numbers, there are only fifteen of us. We need one more person," Tendou pointed out before looking over his shoulder and spotting the perfect target. "Ushi, come join us!"
Ushijima, who had been sitting on the couch with his phone in one hand and a drink in the other, glanced up at his friend quizzically. "Join for what?"
Picking up the dice, Tendou shook them teasingly in his hands and grinned wide. "Some good ol' inappropriate touching."
"No, thank you."
"Why did you word it like that?!" Tanaka grimaced. "Now he definitely won't want to play."
While the rest of the group worked together to try and convince Ushijima to join the game, you watched him from afar, half hoping he would hold out and continue to refuse purely based on the fact that you didn't want to have to face the possibility of being partnered up with him.
Out of everyone in attendance, Ushijima was the only person who you were sure you had never spoken a word to before. You had only met him once or twice while in high school and still, years later, he was just as scary and intimidating as you had thought he was back then. With dark eyes and a face that was set into a permanent scowl, you were unsure if the man even knew what fun was—leaving you wondering why he even showed up to parties at all in the first place.
You were pulled from your inner thoughts when Ushijima sighed heavily, pushed off of the couch, and came to find a spot in the circle to sit. Apparently, he had finally caved.
"Great!" Tendou clapped his friend on the back happily before grabbing an empty red solo cup, a sheet of paper, and a pen. He then scribbled everyone's name down on a shred of paper, folded them up, and mixed them up inside of the cup. "Okay, pass the cup around and draw a name," he instructed. "If you pull your own name, draw again, obviously."
As the cup made its way around to you, you drew in a deep breath and stuck your hand in. When you pulled out a piece of paper and unfolded it, you felt your gut twist nervously.
"Ushijima," you announced, trying your best not to sound too disappointed as you flashed a quick smile at the large man sitting across from you.
If there was a great being above, they were not on your side tonight.
Once the eight teams had been decided and everyone had moved to sit beside their partners, you began to dread the start of this game. Maybe, if you were lucky, Ushijima would refuse right off of the bat and you two could take your loss and not have to interact with each other at all.
The teams were you and Ushijima, Kuroo and Bokuto (who seemed a little too excited to been paired up), Tendou and one of the many college girls Oikawa had invited, Hinata and Oikawa, Tanaka and another college girl (because Kiyoko absolutely refused to play), Yamaguchi and Yachi, Nishinoya and Amanai, and Daichi and Michimiya.
"Okay, who's first?" Hinata was practically vibrating with excitement—starkly contrasted by Kageyama who was vibrating with rage behind him, sitting on the couch and staring daggers into the back of Oikawa's head.
Kageyama hadn't wanted to play, but this outcome suddenly seemed much worse.
"Us!" Bokuto lunged forward for the dice, two of three which were currently in use since the third die was for actual sex positions and despite how drunk everyone was, no one was that drunk.
"Little too eager there, Bud," Oikawa joked, earning a few nervous laughs. Now that the game was actually starting, the reality of the situation had begun to sober a few people up a little.
"You're just upset because you're gonna lose." Bokuto smirked before rolling the dice for everyone to see. The results were 'lick' and 'lips', all in all, a pretty tame first round. "Child's play," Bokuto scoffed before grabbing Kuroo's head harshly, catching him off guard, and running his tongue along his friend's bottom lip.
"Jesus!" Kuroo pushed Bokuto off of him. "You don't have to be so rough about it. If this is how you treat women, no wonder you're single."
The rest of the group broke out into laughter at the bickering. Slowly, as each team took their turn, you started to feel less self-conscious about when it would eventually be your turn.
Right before your turn was Hinata and Oikawa. Grabbing the dice, Hinata tossed them into the middle of the circle. "Bite, navel." Oikawa read out loud before turning to Hinata. "Do you want to be bitten or do you want to do the biting?"
Without a second of hesitation, Hinata pushed Oikawa onto his back before pushing his shirt up. Then, slowly and oddly seductively, he leaned over the larger man and bit the skin adjacent to his belly button, just hard enough to leave marks.
"Woohoo!" Yamaguchi and Yachi cheered, everyone else joining in soon after.
Seemingly egged on by the enthusiasm, Hinata decided to put on a little show—maybe to make Kageyama jealous, maybe not—and as he began to pull away, he ran his tongue over the marks he had just left.
Oikawa shuddered slightly before grabbing Hinata by his orange locks and pulling him away. "Down boy." He smiled. "Save some for the other rounds."
Once the excitement had died down, all eyes turned to you and Ushijima, waiting for one of you to take the initiative and start your turn.
"Okay, let's hope the dice are nice to us," you giggled slightly, trying to diffuse the tension as you took the dice from the middle of the circle and tossed them.
'Suck' and 'thigh'. You closed your eyes briefly and tried not to turn bright red.
Tendou let out a low wolf whistle and a few of the others let out shouts of encouragement as well.
Swallowing hard, you turned to look at Ushijima, who, surprisingly enough, looked completely unfazed. You stared into his dark eyes, waiting for him to draw the line and quit, giving you a perfectly good reason to drop out of the game.
However, the tall, quiet man still had a few surprises up his sleeve.
Adjusting his body so he was facing you, he set down his drink before meeting your gaze and giving a subtle nod.
Unsure how to respond, you nodded back, unsure what it was you were silently agreeing to.
Then, still without uttering a single word, Ushijima grabbed your leg and gently lifted it, placing your ankle on his shoulder. Since he was so much larger than you were, the position forced you into leaning back in order to tolerate the intense stretch of your leg.
The room went dead silent, all eyes glued to the two of you as Ushijima leaned in toward your leg. Unable to tear your gaze away from him, you felt hypnotized by the sight of his mouth inching closer to your inner thigh—the dice said nothing about which part of the thigh, but this man had just decided that the top wasn't good enough for him, apparently.
When you felt his warm breath on your skin, you felt a shiver run up your spine and you dug your fingertips into the floor, praying that no one could tell just how on-edge you were.
With his eyes never leaving yours, he parted his lips—lips that you were just now realizing looked deliciously soft and plump—and placed his mouth onto the skin just below your shorts. When you felt him flick the tip of his tongue against you, you inhaled sharply, and when he softly sucked your skin into his mouth, his teeth gently grazing against the sensitive flesh, your head fell back ever-so-slightly.
"Is it just me or is this really hot?" Nishinoya airily whispered, earning a few slack-jawed nods in response.
When Ushijima finally released your thigh from his mouth, you saw the red, saliva-covered mark he had created. Using the pad of his thumb, he wiped away the spit he had left there before lifting his head to be even with yours.
He watched your trembling bottom lip and noted the slight flush to your cheeks. "I don't lose," were the first words he had spoken to you in your entire life, his voice low and sending a spark of thrill through your body.
Then, as if nothing had happened at all, he lifted your leg off of his shoulder and turned to the next team with an expecting glare.
"Well then," you breathed out, trying your best to seem as calm and collected as your partner. "Beat that, suckers."
"Gladly." Michimiya reached for the dice next, directing the attention to her and Daichi and giving you a minute to collect yourself. However, when the dice came up 'bite' and 'ass', both partners politely bowed out and thus, were the first team to be eliminated.
"Pathetic!" Sugawara called from where he had been watching, shaming Daichi thoroughly before the next team took their turn.
As the dice made their way around the circle again—Tanaka and his partner being the second pair eliminated when he refused to lick her breast with Kiyoko watching—it was your turn again before you knew it.
"This should be good!" Oikawa grinned, wrapped his arm around Hinata's shoulders after just spanking his ass. At that point, Kageyama was silently fuming behind the two, probably two seconds away from kicking Oikawa in the back of the head.
This time, Ushijima decided to roll the dice. "Bite, lips," he read, shrugging nonchalantly as he looked to you. "Easy."
You nodded in agreement even though you had no idea how he was staying so relaxed during all of this. Taking a swig of your drink for some liquid courage, you shuffled closer to Ushijima on your knees, placed your hands on either side of his head, and leaned in.
With the way he was watching you so intensly, you almost sucumbed to the moment and straight-up kissed him. At the last second, though, you remembered the task at hand and carefully took his bottom lip between your teeth.
"Harder," you heard him mutter.
Your eyes widened as you stared directly into his dark pools for eyes, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"Bite me harder," he spoke directly into your mouth, for only you to hear.
A surge of arousal flooded your body as you obliged his request and bit down harder on his lip. What you weren't ready for, however, was for him to let out a barely audible groan and let his eyes flutter closed for a fraction of a second.
Clenching your thighs together insticitevly, you immediately released his lip and backed away. Undeniably turned on, you tried to hide your tell-tale expression by immediately taking a large gulp of your drink, hoping the cup covered your face long enough for you to compose yourself once again.
This game was quickly becoming much more than you had bargained for.
The game continued on after that, Kuroo ending up sinking his teeth into Bokuto's ass, the duo determined to come out on top, and Oikawa and Hinata being eliminated when Kageyama full-on threw Hinata over his shoulder and stormed out of the room right when Oikawa was about to kiss him on the lips.
"Awh, you're such a wet blanket, King!" Oikawa called after the two, using the raven-haired setter's least favourite nickname to taunt him in the process. "Well, boo, I guess I'm out . . . at least it was fun while it lasted."
Somehow, the game lasted much longer than anyone had originally expected. Everyone nearly lost it when Yamaguchi licked the top of Yachi's breast and from there, things just kept getting more and more chaotic. Tendou narrowly avoided a beating after getting a little too handsy with his partner, who, unbeknownst to everyone else, actually had a boyfriend who had just so happened to walk into the room right as he was licking her neck.
With only four teams remaining, the circle got smaller while those who had gotten eliminated stuck around to watch the rest of the game and heckle when and where they felt necessary.
"You can bite harder than that!" Tanaka encouraged Amanai as she bit down on the crook of Nishinoya's neck.
"No!" Nishinoya shouted. "That's hard enough."
Ushijima cracked the faintest smirk at that as he took a sip of his drink. Shaking his head slightly, it was almost like he was disappointed in the smaller guy for not wanting to be bit harder—but with what he had said to you earlier, you were inclined to believe he was.
Somehow, this was not how you imagined your evening going—finding out that a man you had never spoken to before this day was into some pain with his pleasure. But, then again, you supposed it could have been a lot worse.
When it was your turn again, Ushijima ended up having to kiss your naval, which he, of course, did without a second thought. He simply leaned over, pulled up your shirt just enough to expose your belly button, and pressed a simple kiss to your stomach.
Having ingested more alcohol than you probably should have by that point, you chuckled lightly when he kissed you and it tickled. "Good boy." You patted his head affectionately and low and behold, he actually smiled at you as he straightened back up again.
As night turned to early morning, people were growing restless, just wanting the game to be over. Yachi ended up falling asleep, eliminating her and Yamaguchi, and Nishinoya and Amanai bowed out of their own accord so the damn game could end already.
You were starting to think along the same lines due to the fact that you were starting to get a little tired, but Ushijima had other plans—especially when Kuroo and Bokuto kept telling him that they were going to win.
"Oh, faceoff!" Nishinoya announced, gaining his second wind. "Winner takes all."
"Well, we have to make this interesting then," Tendou said. "No more dice. I say . . . viewer's choice!"
Despite the protests from you, Ushijima, Kuroo, and Bokuto—the four of you knowing that leaving your fates in the hands of these drunk idiots would be a major disaster—you were outvoted and before you knew it, the group of spectators were deciding among themselves the first dare for Kuroo and Bokuto.
"Okay," Tanaka clapped his hands together. "Bokuto, suck Kuroo's neck."
"I . . . was expecting you to be much meaner than that," Bokuto admitted as he scooted closer to Kuroo.
Placing a hand on Bokuto's shoulder, Kuroo tilted his head to the side, making plenty of room for his friend and his spiky hair. Wasting no time, Bokuto planted his lips harshly on Kuroo's neck and began to suck like a vampire—like his life depended on it. Kuroo actually let out a subtle moan and moved his hand from Bokuto's shoulder to wrap his arm around his neck, pulling him in closer.
"Goddamn, you don't get extra points for putting on a show!" You pushed them, toppling the duo and putting an end to their erotic performance.
"You just wish you had the pure, raw chemistry that we had." Kuroo nuzzled Bokuto's cheek, making a display of the whole thing.
"Are you guys sure you're just friends?" Oikawa cocked a brow.
Kuroo and Bokuto just ignored him as the viewers began deciding your dare—which, at that point, was probably closer to a punishment.
"We have decided," Yamaguchi grinned wide. "Y/N, please lick Ushijima's nipple."
Your jaw dropped. "Nipple isn't even on the dice," you retorted.
"To hell with the dice," Tendou reminded you. "It's viewer's choice. Be happy we stuck with something so PG. If it were up to me, it'd be a lot worse."
"There is something wrong with you," Ushijima told his friend, but despite what he was saying with his mouth, he was lifting his shirt over his head at the same time and doing something completely different with his actions.
As soon as you caught sight of Ushijima's toned abs and swelling muscles, you swore that if you were a dog, you'd be drooling. "Well, anything to win, right?" You tried to play off your eagerness as the same thirst for victory as the guys.
As you brought your head down to chest level with Ushijima, he planted his large hand onto the back of your head and guided you toward his pink, perked nipple, staring down Kuroo and Bokuto the whole time.
"I don't lose," he told them the same thing he had told you.
Sticking the tip of your tongue out of your mouth, you breathed in through your nose before flicking the tip over the bud of his nipple, trying to copy the same action that he had used on your thigh. The last thing you had been expecting from a man as big and intimidating as Ushijima was for him to be so sensitive, but as soon as your tongue made contact with his skin, he drew in a shuddering breath and his grip on your head tightened.
The reaction he gave you had you practically shaking from adrenaline and arousal, and without being able to help yourself, you licked his nipple again—but this time you didn't just use the tip, instead circling the sensitive bud with the entirety of your warm, wet tongue.
"Fuck," he gasped, looking down at you and tugging your hair so you looked up at him too. "Good girl," he growled, mimicking the praise you had given him earlier.
At that moment, you had completely forgotten about the audience surrounding the two of you. All you wanted to do was kiss him hard and rip his clothes off, but before you could, someone clearing their throat pulled you out of your daze.
"Holy shit . . . if we don't end this thing soon I'm going to explode." Tendou shifted uncomfortably, trying his best to hide the growing bulge in his pants.
"I can't tell if I'm too drunk for this or not drunk enough." Daichi sunk into the couch cushions and sighed.
"So, how the hell do we settle this thing?" Bokuto asked.
Tanaka huffed, rubbing his temples with his fingers. "Can't we just call it a tie?"
You were about to agree to that suggestion, but before you could, Ushijima, Kuroo, and Bokuto were quick to voice their displeasure with that solutution.
"I sunk my teeth into his ass and you're telling me all I get out of it is a tie?" Kuroo jabbed an accusing finger in Bokuto's direction. "No fucking way."
"Well, we can't take it much further without actually entering oral sex and intercourse territory," Oikawa said. "And I don't think any of us wants to wake up to remember that shit tomorrow morning."
While the men argued among themselves, you quicky found yourself growing irritated. Rolling your eyes, you cleared your throat harshly before taking drastic measures. Without warning, you placed your hand on Ushijima's pants, directly over his dick. You felt for the bulge and gripped lightly, essentially palming him over his clothes.
Ushijima, completely taken by surprise, threw his head back at the sudden contact and cursed under his breath. Meanwhile, everyone was staring at you with wide eyes as you glared at Kuroo and Bokuto, silently daring one of them to take it as far as you had.
"What is happening right now?" Daichi asked rhetorically, completely shocked by what he was witnessing.
"I have no idea, but I'm so turned on right now." Tendou shifted again.
Kuroo and Bokuto looked to one another, a miriad of conversations taking place between their glances without a single word leaving their mouths. While they silently debated between themselves whether they were willing to keep playing, you decided to step it up once again and put an end to the game once and for all.
"No?" you questioned, removing your hand from the top of Ushijima's crotch before slipping it underneath his waistband and underwear, fully gripping his quickly hardening erection with your small hand. "What about now?"
In a matter of seconds, the scary, intimidating man before you had been reduced to a puddle of moans and gutteral groans. Ushijima was losing his mind in front of everyone, but yet, he was the last thing anyone cared about. Everyone was watching your icy glare and waiting to see if Kuroo and Bokuto would continue to compete.
Eventually, the male duo shook their heads, defeated. As much as they fooled around with each other sometimes, they weren't willing to go that far with so many people watching.
"That's what I thought." You ran your finger over the tip of Ushijima's cock, spreading some of his pre-cum around the head and eliciting what could be described as a whimper from his trembling lips. "We don't lose," you copied your partners words.
Once you and Ushijima had been declared the winners, you promplty removed your hand from his pants. Drawing in a deep inhale, as if he had been holding his breath the entire time you had been touching him, Ushijima collapsed onto his back in the middle of the floor.
You chuckled to yourself, unable to believe that you had once thought he was scary and unapproachable.
As the gathered group began to disperse, you leaned over your partner and watched as he inhaled and exhaled rhythmically and blinked rapidly, thoroughly aghast by what had just taken place.
"You doing okay?" you checked on him and handed him his shirt.
Swallowing hard, he nodded. "Yeah, just . . . you know . . ."
"Well, it was really good to officially meet you, by the way." You stuck your hand out to shake his.
He let out a dry laugh before reciprocating the gesture. "Yeah . . . good to meet you too."
"I'm gonna grab a drink," you told him before your eyes trailed down to the erection he was sporting, the bulge painfully obvious through his pants. "If you want some help with your problem, come find me."
He just blinked up at you, wide-eyed, before nodding slowly.
With that, you turned on your heel and walked off, thoroughly pleased that you had not only won the game, but maybe made a new friend along the way.
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i have a theory... it’s a mouthful though
aquarius, capricorn and scorpio* placements get roasted a lot for their fear of being open and vulnerable, especially when it comes to relationships and love. they generally are criticized for their preferences for being alone (which is.. strange, because there’s nothing wrong with that, imo), but people rarely reflect on why this is often the case. i want to talk about frequent happenings with placements connecting to these three signs, and why they end up developing into adults who have abandonment issues, fears of vulnerability/closeness, fierce/unnecessary independence, and so forth.
this post is going to connect mainly to venus (relationships & love, etc) and moon (emotions & often childhood) in these signs, as well as those planets being aspected by saturn, uranus or pluto [however, it’s possible this could apply for other strong personals + dominants/stelliums].
with capricorn as one’s venus/moon (or saturn aspecting venus/moon), love throughout childhood; and sometimes into adulthood; was often conditional, only ever earned. love and affection may have even been weaponized in a sense; used as a rare reward, not a given. saturn is a planet representing hard work, to put things super simply, and when attaching itself to such emotional planets (especially venus), can indicate an individual who had to work hard for love. children, obviously, should not have to work hard for their guardians love and affection (nor do i think adults in relationships [platonic or romantic] should have to *work* for someone’s love either). this tends to manifest as an adult who puts people through hundreds of test to prove they’re worthy of the capricorn individual’s trust and affection, as they view this as the norm. they also lack trust in people’s affections, often thinking there’s some sort of hidden motive or obstacle within the affection. they may develop tendencies to be mostly attracted to flaky individuals with fleeting (& conditional) affection and love for them. undeveloped they crave that “risk-reward” situation in romance. all of these factors considered, this is why capricorn venuses/moons, venus-saturn/moon-saturn aspected individuals often prefer to be alone, and have a general distaste towards/distrust in “love” and deep connection.
with aquarius as one’s venus/moon (or uranus aspecting venus/moon), love tends to be very unpredictable. in childhood, and again also into adulthood possibly, it is likely that the love experienced in their home was very fleeting and unstable. as aquarius is also ruled by saturn, you can read the capricorn/saturn explanation above, which will also apply heavily to aquarius placements. but on the uranus side of things, this planet (known for sudden, drastic changes) having connection to venus/moon can indicate an individual who frequently experiences a “roller coaster of emotions”. with moon & venus in aquarius/aspecting uranus, it can point towards friends and romantic partners who leave as quickly as they came. in childhood, their family may have gone through phases of being present vs absent, or being open vs closed, etc. the home may have been a place of great emotional turmoil and instability. this often, i find, develops into adults who project these habits onto future relationships. swinging from being very invested/nearly obsessed with a person/relationship, only to withdraw and lose interest just as quickly. i think it’s partially due to the fear of abandonment that tends to pop up through such a childhood, and also due to hot & cold love being seen as a norm for aquarian placements when younger, therefore they bring it with them into adulthood before they fully develop. since love tends to be so frequently unstable for them, they grow distaste towards it and generally prefer to keep to themselves and stick to their isolation.
with scorpio placements (namely venus/moon, or pluto aspecting venus/moon), it’s almost like a mix of the two things listed above. pluto, similar to saturn, can connect heavily to power and control. pluto is also *more intense* than uranus when it comes to changes. changes with scorpio/pluto are like death & rebirth, huge transformations. i’ve noticed throughout the scorpio moons childhood, much like capricorns, they are given a lot of responsibility and stress. the family often manipulates them into working for/earning their love, or there is frequent turmoil and power struggles within the home; causing distrust within the family that later develops into scorpio’s inability to trust others. love is also frequently conditional here, as it is with aqua/cap. this can lead to their future distaste/fear of getting truly intimate with the people they develop feelings for. they also are likely to experience very drastic changes in their childhood, not small nor easy to digest ones, that end up resulting in abandonment and/or trust issues that are carried into the future until fully developed as well. scorpio moons tend to get used to things never being truly stable, and get used to people’s intentions - especially those closest to them - never being pure/without baggage, which can result in an adult who shuts everyone out and refuses to open up, as they grow immensely suspicious and paranoid of anyone around them.
capricorn, scorpio & aquarius placements also usually have to grow up very fast. scorpio & capricorn specifically tend to have to mature and take on way too many responsibilities from a very young age. aquarius placements i find tend to frequently endure betrayals & abandonment during childhood. these things develop to the fierce independence these three signs tend to carry. they’re so used to doing and handling everything alone, they don’t believe they need anyone else. and even if they do, they don’t think they could possibly trust someone else to get close enough to help them / connect with them deeply, due to these frequent stresses, changes, and conditional love situations common in their pasts (and sometimes into adulthood too).
* = scorpios are heavily connected with intimacy and vulnerability. but undeveloped scorpios expect intimacy and vulnerability from others without returning the same energy. they tend to hide their own feelings while encouraging others to pour out theirs, creating what feels like one-sided intimacy.
anyway. just a little thought. can we stop making fun of aquarius, capricorn & scorpio placements (and...anyone in general) for being scared of relationships, intimacy, vulnerability, etc., and think about the reasoning as to why these fears develop and how they can be healed. (also, want to make it clear i’m not saying only these placements can experience these things! nor are these placements guaranteed to experience these things. it also doesn’t release accountability for any negative romantic/commitment habits that they may project onto/hurt others with)
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Just the Translator
Part Ten of the Rough Day Series
Word Count: 7.6K
Warnings: There is rough sex in this. THERE IS ROUGH SEX IN THIS. Do NOT read if that offends you. There is also more anal stuff—NO FUCKING (not yet). Uh, canon-typical violence, grumpy Din Djarin, some fluffy moments, Baby Yoda being a little troublemaker, bit of a cliffhanger ending BUT NOT TO WORRY PALS I ALREADY GOT QUITE A BIT OF THE NEXT PART WRITTEN
A/N: ***Please take a second to visit this googledoc, in it are useful links regarding the BLM protests and what we can do to help. Here is a separate link to where I originally addressed this and shared more thoughts***
Whelp. At least you’re in a good mood.
In contrast, Din and the kid have been causing problems all morning, the both of them. Like two… two annoying, middle-aged children competing to see which one is less mature.
The smaller of the two, and older (most likely) is bouncing with energy. Acting a complete fool. Ready and willing to launch out of his restricting little sphere at any second, a bright green bundle of energy that slept way too well last night and is just rubbing it in at this point. He was fine earlier—checking out of the inn, picking up some food at a local market, riding in the Crest as it navigated towards the most isolated sector on this planet—but the hike to this field has been like pulling teeth.
In fact, Din is currently wearing a singular gauntlet on his left hand for that very reason—so this child’s hyper ass could be contained within the hovering, reflective prison. He’s restless, though, continuing to act out. At one point you suggest just letting him walk to let some energy out like yesterday, even if he slows the group down with his tiny little legs. Once you let the little menace out on parole though, he just continues to veer off in his own direction and irritate his dad even further.
And, oh stars—his dad.
Din has barely said a word, only answering with short responses when directly prompted and spending most of his energy just silently stewing inside his own little grumpy teapot on his head. The helmet is the only other piece of armor he’s donning besides the lone vambrace, and you’re surprised steam hasn’t started whistling through the top of it with how frustrated he is, how many times you’ve seen him curl his hands with impatience. At first it was amusing, though you know better than to tease him about it right now. You keep your mouth shut and try your best to wrangle the kid, doing everything you can to be helpful while also steering clear of unintentionally exacerbating his silent irritation, knowing Din isn’t in the mood for jokes after being interrupted at a very crucial moment last night. The sun shines directly on the front of his helmet and blinds you with every single annoyed step, so you follow just far enough behind him and try to use his enormous refrigerator of a body to shield your eyes.
At first it was amusing. But then the baby catches sight of a gorgeously patterned butterfly floating through the field that he probably wants to snack on for breakfast, and he breaks off from your entourage once more with a quiet little coo that should strike pure terror into the hearts of small animals everywhere.
Immediately you’re turning to go get him—but then a large hand quickly snatches the front of your shirt before you can take a single step, pulling until you’re colliding with an unarmored chest with an oof.
A bare hand catches your jaw and tightens until you’re staring deep into the thin blade of his visor, before Din whispers rough through the modulator, “As soon as he falls asleep.”
That’s all he says. And then he’s releasing you and letting you stumble back towards his wayward son a whole lot less amused than you were before, and a whole lot more achy. The baby shenanigans are far less amusing too.
“You’re killing me here, kiddo,” you breathe after quickly catching up with him, having to bend in half to lead him back towards his impatient dad.
His hot, moody… incredibly well endowed dad, thick arms crossed tight over his chest as he waits for your return.
The monster’s hand lifts high above him as his three fingers cling to just one of yours, the baggy brown sack exposing his pudgy little green elbow as he follows next to you with a waddle. It’s slow going, but at some point he decides to pull himself up onto your wrist and you catch him, cradling him in your arms before quickly hurrying back to Din.
Thankfully he begins to calm down a little after that. As you three eventually find a spot in the endlessly breezy field to settle into, the kid clamors back into his shield while Din carelessly drops the dark bag of supplies he carried from the Crest into the tall grass. You twist your back to let some of the stiffness out, rotating your arms to encourage more movement as he approaches.
“Same thing as yesterday,” he gruffs when he’s in reach, patting his chest again with a bare hand. “Hard as you can.”
“My… My hands hurt,” you eventually admit, not wanting to frustrate him even more and hoping you would be able to work on blocking today instead, but Din just nods while you gently brush your thumb along your sore knuckles.
“That’ll happen until it doesn’t,” he tells you quietly, reaching out to touch your elbow in a quick, awkward gesture of comfort and then dropping his arm to his side. Short, but not unkind. “Push through. You can do it.”
You nod, knowing that’s probably the very best motivation you’ll get from him. His beliefs, condensed down to quick, stunted sentences, presented with such unwavering surety that they must be truths. Weirdly, it works wonders for you. Maybe it’s just the person it’s coming from.
You drop into stance and then slam your fist into his chest before he’s ready, and Din steps back on impact with a small grunt while you bite your lip to silence your own noise from the pain reverberating up your arm.
“Good,” he huffs nonetheless, rubbing the spot on his chest he’s historically designated as target practice. “Good. You’re… hitting harder than yesterday. That’s… fuck. Good.”
“Good?” You ask lowly, chancing a quick look over at the kid. Who blinks directly back at you, wide-eyed and staring purposefully from his crib. You deflate just a little bit at the sight of him still wide awake, and Din’s fists are clenched by his sides when you turn back to him.
He doesn’t say anything, but you can feel the pent up tightness in his body as you spend the next couple hours throwing more hits at him, different types. Left hooks, right hooks, crosses, jabs, elbow strikes, palm heels. He was absolutely right though—the more you make contact with him, the less you begin to feel the pain, until it eventually feels like nothing at all to you.
But then, at one point, you pull your hardened fist back, aimed and focused directly on that same spot on his chest once more—when suddenly his hand flashes up and he flicks his finger against the lower part of your open ribcage.
He barely puts any strength into it at all—it’s the pressure you’d use to tap someone on the shoulder if you were trying to get their attention, but for some reason the incredibly well-placed reminder throws you. A little fucking touch like that shouldn’t hurt nearly as much as it does, but you nearly tip sideways and have to catch your footing with how dizzy it makes you.
“That’s what’s called a liver shot,” Din tells you calmly, watching you wrap your hand around your ribcage and wince at the lingering pain through gritted teeth. “Keep your arm down like I told you. That’ll happen every time you wanna get lazy with me, little chicken wing.”
You hiss and shake your head a little bit, trying to clear the fog, and then purposefully tuck both arms tight to your sides. But then—
His hand flashes up again and taps the side of your face this time—not hard enough to hurt but enough to make you flinch on instinct and take a step back. “That arm stays up.”
Your quick huff of air is suppressed. Somewhat censored—it doesn’t duly portray the sharp flare of annoyance you experience. You do exactly what he says, however, and keep your arms in position in front of you.
But then you jerk back and sputter angrily when the tips of his fingers lightly connect with your cheek once more. “Stop that! My hands are up!”
“Then why’d you let me do it?” He asks, stepping up as you retreat to poke you square in your chest. “Stop letting me do it.”
He goes to tap your face again, but this time your forearm comes up to swat his away before he can make contact, and he seems pleased for the moment. Din steps back and hits his chest again. “Come on.”
He lets you get in just a few more blows before coming at you again. You smack his hand away and then go to throw another punch, but he’s quick. He cheats—goes for you twice in a row when you’re not expecting it, and taps the vulnerable spot on your side for the second time today. It hits you like a bullet and takes you a second to snap out of the abrupt shot of pain.
“Come on,” Din taunts once more, curling his mismatched fingers at you—one hand leathered and the other tan and bare. He sounds like he’s grinning under the helmet, starting to enjoy this way too fucking much. It makes your blood boil, makes you just stand there like an idiot for a few seconds and fume at his audacity.
Apparently you take too long getting pissed off at him. He comes at you first, going for your side again, but you shove his arm out of the way with a growl. Except his other arm flashes and you react instantly, ducking under the wide, careful swipe aimed for your cheek and then zeroing in on the same exact spot below his ribs he’s been torturing you with all day, the one left wide open while his arm misses its mark.
Except—yours isn’t a tap, or a flick. It’s a hard uppercut.
Air rushes through the modulator as he groans and stumbles sideways, gasping and trying to steady himself. Triumph surges through your veins as you watch him, shaking your hand out at your side to quickly encourage the numbness away, your knuckles not yet used to hitting bone. He clutches his side and shakes the helmet violently in an effort to regain himself, breathing hard through the filter and—
The visor instantly jerks to you and you’re already taking a step back on instinct, adrenaline roaring. He snaps upright as you continue to retreat—until you trip over yourself and plunge to the grass.
A reflection catches in your peripheral, and you whip your head to the side to see the kid completely passed out in his metallic cradle, eyes closed and mouth drooping a bit. The sight shoots pure exhilaration through you, but it’s nothing compared to the thrill of only seeing him there for a split second before chrome shields instantly slide shut over his head.
You look back to Din just in time to see him dropping his gloved hand back down to his side and taking quick steps towards you—and you react without thinking. You scramble over on your hands and knees and then launch forwards before you’re even halfway off the ground, finding your feet as you stumble into a run and hearing footsteps pick up behind you.
Maker, it’s been ages since you’ve run like this. You don’t even know why you’re running—you just do, it just feels like you should. Your body barrels through tall grass and your heart thunders faster than the sound of your pumping legs, louder than the wind whipping through your ears. You don’t know if he purposefully allows you to get this far or if you’re genuinely quick—
—nope. Nope, you’re not quick, because he suddenly bursts into a sprint behind you and gains way too much ground way too quickly. You try to break left as soon as you realize what’s happening, but he’s too fast and hooks an arm around your stomach just before you’re out of reach. Din yanks you back to his chest as he twists around and takes you both to the ground, his shoulder blades slamming down first and softening your landing with his whole body and a grunt, skidding you both to a halt in the endlessly wavy field.
The wind is knocked out of you regardless. You try and struggle off of him but the positioning makes it almost impossible—your abdominal muscles are no match for the strength of his arms wrapped around your stomach, keeping your body pinned tight to his as you wrestle to lift against him in the grass.
“Fight harder,” Din growls raggedly in your ear, and your pussy seizes with need when you feel how rock hard he is against your ass. It encourages you—you make a rough sound towards the sky and then lift against him with all your strength, and your elbow comes down hard into his ribcage. Air whooshes out of him and his arms loosen just slightly. You’re able to wiggle off him and start crawling away, but then he heaves over and snatches at your pant leg—
Which means you pull them down yourself as you keep clawing yourself forward by your arms, raw excitement coursing through your veins, the fabric pulling tight over your ass and then bunching around your thighs. You squeal and flounder and kick at him—but Din just grabs at your ankle and then pins your leg to the ground, pushing up and using your calves to clamor on top of you with brute strength, catching your underwear and ripping them down too. Your heart pounds and your pussy just about floods itself hearing him dig in his pants to pull his cock out, his breath coming heavy through the helmet.
Maker, you’re so fucking ready for it. You keep struggling just because your body is telling you to, but nothing close to the word ‘stop’ ever leaves your mouth, never even comes to mind. You feel wetness slicking your inner thighs as Din grunts and plants an arm next to your head, his bare hand shooting out to hover in front of your face. You flinch—but he keeps it there, palm open in front of your lips in silent expectation.
“Wet or dry,” he snarls when you don’t immediately react. “I don’t give a shit.”
Still, his hand stays right in front of your face long enough to let you make up your mind.
And… not lick it.
After a moment, Din makes a sound that drops another wave of white hot arousal down through your stomach—a furious, growly noise that resembles distorted static passing through the filter. He angles his cock against your opening and when you hear him muttering angrily, you think he’s scolding you for it. Calling you dirty under his breath, promising you you’ll regret saying that in a second. But no—he’s—
“Perfect. Perfect little girl, fucking perfect,” Din hisses darkly, pushing into your soaking entrance without anything but your slick to ease his way. “H-How are you—s-so fuck—ing—”
Oh Maker, you turn your head into the grass and cry out through the delicious, blissful intrusion, pushing your hips back against his—and Din curses as he quickly bottoms out, making sure he lurches fully into you before his hands find out exactly where they want to be. They land on your lower back and he mounts up, pinning your body hard to the ground with almost his full weight. It means you can rip out as much grass with your useless arms as you want—he doesn’t even give you a single moment now that he’s successfully rooted you to the crushed greenery. You bloom for him all the same, as soon as Din pulls out with a wet sound and then starts fucking you strong and steady.
It’s sharp. Biting. Even the pleasure has a hard edge to it, completely paralyzing you even if you could struggle in this position. His hands are pushing down so hard that the ground digs into your tummy and makes his cock angle and slam right into your g-spot each and every time. You want to moan out your ecstasy but he’s wringing the air from your lungs with every shattering swing of his hips back and forth, quickly speeding up as he goes and taking out a full night’s worth of deprivation on you.
“Ngh. Take. Cock. So. Fucking. Good—” Din grits with every mean thrust, the staccato growls of praise getting lost in the echoing, rhythmic clap of his hips. You can’t fucking breathe—the pleasure is too overwhelming, your face is pressed into the grass, he’s got almost all his weight on you. You’re helpless to do anything besides close your eyes, furrow your brows, drop your jaw, and just let him own your body in the middle of this beautiful oasis. The heavy, wild thrusts steal every sense away from you, any ability to think beyond the fractured piece of heaven he’s striking inside you over and over. You don’t even feel him grabbing your asscheeks and spreading them—
Somebody makes a pitiful, breathless whine—it’s you, you realize. You make that sound, because worn leather lands right on the entrance he was denied last night and shamelessly breaches it before anything else can interrupt him.
“Tight,” he hisses, slowly sinking his thumb all the way down to the knuckle while you clench your eyes shut and choke out his name, “—f-fucking tight—”
His cock pulses inside you and you bear down as hard as you can on it in return, trying to get accustomed to being penetrated in two places at once. He doesn’t move his thumb after that—he just keeps it there, deep inside you while he continues wrecking you with the brutal hammering of his hips from behind.
Still—the impropriety of it starts to burn you up, how… dirty it is. Getting the life fucked out of you in broad daylight, in the middle of a wide open field, the thickest finger he has buried deep in your ass, helpless to do anything else besides lay here and let him—you feel yourself start to clamp down, steadily getting tighter and tighter around the intrusions while he grits out hard curses and keeps giving it to you through the rapid build.
His name—you start repeating it into the ground like it’s the only thing you’ve ever known. The word scrapes from your throat over and over, and you try to pull at the grass but your hands are clenched into fists and you can’t seem to remember which muscles to use to open them.
“You like this?” You’re able to hear him grit from above you. “Like when I—fuck—when I fuck you l-like this? When I just. H-Hold you down and take—” he chokes, “—take what I w-want—”
You can’t respond, but fuck yes, you do. The kindling spark inside you suddenly flares up and starts to spread through your body like wildfire, tightening, tightening, tightening, but then—
He’s so pent up—Din cums.
The savage thrusts suddenly stutter to a halt and the gasp he takes in sounds like it physically hurts him. Like the orgasm is just ripped out of him. His hold turns to steel on you, as if he thinks you can somehow get away right now, and Din cums deep inside your spasming cunt with a shuddering, desperate groan of your name.
It’s like it drains everything from him—he slumps, just conscious enough to slowly ease his thumb out of your tight asshole, and then he collapses in the grass next to you. You stay there for just a second and shake next to him, muscles feeling like they’re creaking even while just laying on the ground like this, completely motionless.
“Shit—was that—” Din pants, turning and scooting over to you to brush your hair out of your face with his bare hand, “was that… okay? Do you… do you need…?”
You’re still so submissive, still so high on the overwhelming rush of pleasure, your mouth opens and croaks out a response without your permission. “It was good.”
“Yeah?” He huffs, dropping back on the grass and trying to catch his breath. “Good.”
And… it’s true. It was good, it was absolutely fucking amazing. So overpowering, such a hard fuck that you almost don’t think about the fact that you didn’t actually cum from it. The thought doesn’t really even register with you fully, not yet.
Eventually you both push yourselves up, each of you equally lacking in energy, just in different ways. Din looks like he’s drunk—unbalanced and dizzy while he removes his glove and stuffs it into one of his pockets, before carefully tucking his spent cock back in his trousers. In contrast, you’re nothing more than another trembling blade of grass in an enormous landscape of them, flimsy and yielding to the powerful, rippling wind as you attempt to adjust your clothing.
It’s fine, you tell yourself on the slow, quiet walk back. Sex doesn’t always need to end in a fiery orgasm. Sometimes a rough pounding hits the spot, scratches that itch. You feel like you’re a newborn blurg trying to balance your oddly proportioned weight on two noodle legs as Din’s hand patiently guides you from your lower back, and a bright flare of arousal arcs through you feeling how gentle his hold is compared to the way his cum is steadily leaking from your throbbing, aching cunt.
You don’t need to cum every single time he fucks you. It’s fine.
Upon returning to the sight of the unbothered, napping kid, you both decide to walk a bit more, and you learn your lesson this time. The sun glints bright against Din’s left side while traveling in this direction, so you stick purposefully to his right the entire time.
In the meantime, you share easy conversation and attempt to regain some semblance of control over your still slightly… restless body. Slowly but surely, your feverish arousal for him dims and fades to the backburner, replaced instead by… softer, quieter feelings. There’s not a solid word for it, not really. If you were mixing on a palette, you’d start out with a base of gentle contentment and then add a big dollop of affection, diluted with silence until it’s a swirling, pastel… color you don’t have a name for, but cherish all the same.
The baby wakes up about halfway through the afternoon hike, and he’s better now too. Eventually your ragtag party finds a place to settle for the night—a small clearing in the field at the edge of a thick forest. There’s a sizable log and boulder situated relatively close together, with a wide open space to make a fire in the center.
Din disappears for a bit to go get some firewood from the looming forest while you entertain the kid; the log is tilted perfectly to allow you both to watch the sunset, and you easily converse with the riveting baby talk as if he’s an absolute genius.
“I’m not so sure about that, honestly,” you tell him diplomatically, receiving nothing but unintelligible babbles in response as he climbs all over you. “Well, no actually, because there’s two major schools of thought concerning that, the first being—”
He pops up in front of your face to interrupt you heatedly and you scoff, rolling your eyes over the loud gibberish. “Look, I’d appreciate it if we could tone down the passive-aggressiveness, okay? If we can’t have a respectful discussi—”
Three green fingers settle over your lips and you gasp at the nerve of him, forced to let him continue to ramble on your lap about absolutely nothing at all, the size of his ego soon growing to match the size of his ears.
“Hear that, shiny?” You turn your head and ask his father upon his eventual return, and Din grunts distractedly as he dumps the firewood down and rummages around in the bag for a lighter. Tilting your head back towards the kid, you prompt him with a raised brow. “Tell him what you just told me.”
The baby bursts into more nonsense, encouraged by your attention, and Din crouches down to set the wood into position in the dusky twilight glow while saying nothing at all, and it somehow manages to pass as listening intently.
It continues to go on like that far longer than you expected it would, the baby apparently having quite the bone to pick about something that’s been on his mind, and one point you have to rest your hand over his mouth so he finally stops babbling. “Hey, that’s not very nice,” you scold him quietly. “I’m sure his face is perfectly normal under there.”
The helmet turns just slightly towards you, unamused while you snort at your own joke for a little bit.
“I didn’t say it,” you remind him after far too long of just celebrating your own hilarity, clearing your throat through the stifled chuckles. “I’m just translating.”
“Oh yeah?” He eventually murmurs, beginning to ignite some of the crumpled twigs at the center of the pile, and if you worked at it, you could probably convince yourself he’s sharing your gentle smile. More muted than yours perhaps, but beautiful and easy on his face, fitting him simply and perfectly. “What did… What did he say I look like?”
You would’ve shot something ridiculous back at him, something snarky and facetious, but you stop short. You catch it—underneath his voice, it sounds… timid, almost. Uncertain. It makes you take just a second in responding.
“Brown eyes,” you tell him after a moment, and Din doesn’t visibly react, just continues to slowly add small branches to kindle the flame. It’s so quiet out here, but it’s different from hyperspace quiet. This quiet is… natural. Warm, and. Free. Fleeting, allowed to roam. In a way that hyperspace just feels compact, stifling. “He said you have… brown eyes. And a… a strong bone structure, striking features. A sharp, chiseled jaw, dark facial hair. And, uh. He also said…”
Din keeps silently feeding the fire until it’s crackling and bright, and then he settles back on his butt next to it, both elbows resting on his knees, not moving the visor towards you but waiting for you to finish regardless.
The stunning backdrop gives way to a stunning surge of bravery.
“He said you make a bunch of faces under there that nobody ever sees,” you say softly, blinking at Din in the fading twilight while the kid sits silently in your lap. “That you’re an open book. Behind a metal wall. And you have a really nice smile, I bet—he bets… he bets you probably do it more often than anyone realizes. And your… your hair starts to curl when you let it grow long, and. And you’re almost guaranteed to be drop dead gorgeous under there, and it’s a real fucking shame that you’ve probably never had anyone tell you it.”
Din tilts his helmet at you, looks at you for a long time—long enough for blood to rush to your cheeks and for you to get fidgety. But when he finally does respond, his voice is gentle through the modulator. “He said that.”
You mhm at him quickly, nodding your head and turning away as casually as you can, heart beating incredibly fast for some reason. “Just the translator.”
A lovely silence soon blankets the both of you, a warmth permeating through to your bones that has nothing to do with the steadily growing fire.
A little while later, the kid has retired to his reflective cradle and the dancing flames are the only source of light besides the bright moon hanging directly overhead. Din sits with his back to the large boulder and digs through the bag, pulling out all sorts of food you picked up before leaving the village this morning and handing them to you. Something red and unfocused flashes oddly against the curve of his helmet when he reaches his hand back in, but it’s only for a second—he’s already pushing more food at you and filling your arms with bags of dried meats, fresh fruit, and loaves of bread.
“Stars,” you whisper under your breath, examining the feast in the flickering firelight. “Here, take—take some of this, it’s too much.”
“There’s more in here,” he counters lowly, zipping the bag and dropping it somewhere on the other side of his body. “The kid hasn’t eaten all day. Might crawl away and catch himself a Gungan later if you don’t feed him soon.”
“No, I mean—” you let all the food drop into your lap and start sorting the items, “—you need to eat. What do you want? There’s plenty.”
“I’m not hungry,” he answers, far too quickly to have actually taken a moment to check. “Just give me whatever you two don’t eat when you’re finished, I’ll put it back in the bag.”
Okay, if he’s gonna play it like this, you’ll just have to choose for him. You’ve already dedicated at least two bags of dried meat to the kid, which takes care of him. So, you take an extended moment to methodically find the ripest fruit in the bunch, the one with the most squish to it, and then search for the softest loaf of bread, not caring that Din is silently watching you. You gather both of them in your arms and then pluck three bags of meat from the pile, before depositing all of them back into his lap.
“Eat,” you urge quietly, grabbing another portion of food for yourself, heavy on the fruit. “Don’t inhale it. Please.”
With that, you grab the kid’s food and then scoop the little guy up from his shield with your free arm, standing and walking to the other side of the fire. You carefully plop yourself down with your back purposefully to Din, the kid happily finding a place on your lap with his back to you and reaching six little fingers out for the food.
You start eating, and after a moment, you smile around the large bites of fruit at the sound of metal clinking against stone. The baby, of course, refuses to even open the bag of dried meat you set in front of him, so you roll your eyes and do it yourself, hoping he’ll at least eat like an adult and give you some time to feed yourself. But no—the fifty year old creep demands to be hand fed, and any other day, you wouldn’t have let him get away with it.
Today, you’re just really fucking. Happy.
You’re unbelievably happy. Having spent a few days on this gorgeous planet, your two favorite people in the galaxy with you. It fills your heart with air.
You start out quiet, praying you aren’t bothering Din as he (hopefully) continues to relax and enjoy his food behind you. You begin humming your favorite melody under the sound of the crackling flames, the source of heat burning pleasantly against the curve of your lower back, setting another piece of dried meat into the kid’s cute little mouth and only just slightly annoyed that he refuses to do this himself. Admittedly though, you do love babying him, especially when he shows you his adorable little chompers.
One bite for him, two bites for you. That’s the deal, even though you’re hungry and you deserve way more than double his food intake rate. You try to be quiet enough that your gentle humming will get lost with the fire between you and Din, and he never says anything or tells you to cut it out, so you just continue to let your cheerful mood provide a quiet soundtrack to the moonlit evening.
Even better, you and the kid actually finish snacking before he does, and you’re more than willing to wait for him, thrilled that this is actually happening. It’s so simple, such a throwaway thing, but. Knowing he used to eat his meals as quick as he can and now he’s comfortable enough to just take a second and enjoy it… you don’t know, there’s something inherently meaningful about it, something that you specifically notice. Something about this, about sitting around a fire and sharing a meal together for the first time—even with your back turned to him, it just feels… familial. In a way. More than it’s ever felt before.
You have a little moment. It’s nice. You drop your head back and gaze up at the night sky, in awe of how different the stars look from this side of the galaxy and remembering how far you’ve come. The kid follows suit, leaning back against your tummy and blinking silently at the universe, the star-speckled sky reflecting in his gigantic dark eyes.
He starts to doze after awhile, listening to you hum softly to yourself, but the noise of a helmet finally lifting from the boulder and most likely fitting itself back in its rightful place snaps him awake just enough. The kid pushes off you and waddles over to his dad, and you scoot yourself back over to your little log while he unceremoniously clamors up onto Din’s thighs.
Admittedly, it’s really fucking cute. The visor moves just enough to watch him plop his little green butt down and find a comfy position on his lap, not helping but not preventing the movement either. A heartwarming, silent kind of tolerance hardened men have for innocent little creatures that makes you bite your lip to hide your smile. What a softie.
You sit there in companionable quiet, staring deep into the dancing firelight and losing track of time just a bit. They’re hypnotic, the flames. Crackling and popping, warming just the forward-facing parts of you and nearly burning your cheeks, but you love it. Breathing in the woodsy campfire air, hearing the gentle breeze float through the field surrounding you, the quiet forest waving dark and deep in the distance. The midnight sky stretches long above you and the stars seem… brighter than they were on Arvala-7. They probably aren’t—that planet is practically abandoned and has almost no light pollution whatsoever compared to Naboo, but… maybe it’s because now they feel… in reach. Something you can touch. Interact with. Something you can cover your eyes, blindly point at, and then say—that one. That’s where we should go next.
After awhile—you have no idea how long—you blink your gaze over to Din and startle to find the helmet facing you directly, shamelessly, the kid completely passed out on his lap as the flames reflect in the visor.
Without intending to, you’re already thinking back to earlier today. How quickly he bolted after you, how strong he was bringing you to the ground, pinning you under him and taking what was so rudely denied to him last night.
You didn’t actually finish, and you can still feel it simmering down low. Din’s cum has been steadily leaking from you all day, and while you eventually became successful at blocking out the sensation, it suddenly slams to the forefront of your mind again. The visor pierces deep into you while you start to squirm just a bit against the rough log pressed into your back. You can still feel him when you flex your lower muscles, and you bite your lip and do it repeatedly while blinking at him, waiting, squeezing your thighs together and loving the reminder.
He still hasn’t said anything to you, and you start to get antsy under his stare. Your body works itself up even more, fueled by the flames reflecting in his helmet. After a few more moments of silent tension, you’ve finally had enough.
“Din,” you whisper, trying not to make it sound like a whine and his head quickly lifts when you didn’t even realize it was slightly tipped forward. The helmet rolls back in a drowsy little circle, as if his neck is suddenly remembering the weight burdening it. Embarrassment instantly floods you. “Oh. Shit. I’m so stupid. I’m sor—”
Only he’s already pushing himself up with his free arm, lethargic and drunk with exhaustion, not saying a single word as he sets the conked out kid in the cradle and closes the shield over his sleepy little head with the push of a button.
You bite your lip as he drags himself over to you, swinging a leg behind you and then dropping down without any ceremony, firmly inserting himself between the uncomfortable log and your back. Your butt is shoved forward from the sudden displacement but he’s not done. Din wraps both his arms around you and pulls, dragging you up onto his long torso while his legs close under you and you’re off the ground completely.
Oh Maker, he’s already thousands of times more comfortable than sleeping up against the log would be. He makes the best bed in the galaxy, big and warm and firm under you, letting you stretch out long on him. You lounge on his lap and drop your head to his shoulder, resting your arms on top of his as they drape heavy across your belly.
“Sorry,” he gruffs, voice low and rough through the modulator. The filter rings sharp through your ear when it’s pressed up against his helmet like this. “Just need a few hours. Didn’t… didn't sleep great last night.”
You close your eyes and internally scold yourself, now taking responsibility for his lack of rest for the past two days. Shit. You don’t actively respond, feeling slightly put out, but your body is of another mind altogether. It still continues trundling down the steep slope you shoved it towards earlier, when you stupidly thought he was giving you eyes under the helmet instead of him being passed out cold. You wiggle against him just slightly under the guise of finding a comfortable position, but it has unintentional consequences.
You breathe out a soft sigh when your hips move over his cock, biting your lip at the sensation but trying so hard to stop it in its tracks. He’s exhausted, and he already fucked the life out of you today, there’s no way he’ll want to go again this soon. Except—then he shifts and mmms low in his throat.
“And you,” Din murmurs quietly, reaching a hand down to slowly push under your pants, “need to start being more honest with me.”
“What are you t—oh, stars,” you whisper, your body shuddering as one of his thick fingers slowly dips into your slit.
“Shit, you’re wet,” he groans, sinking his hand down lower to feel remnants of himself still easing its way out of you. Your lashes flutter as your jaw drops, and his cock gets hard against your spine almost immediately. “You’re fucking… soaked. I—I asked if you came and you said yeah,” he whispers low to you, but you shake your head. “Why’d you lie to me abo—”
“No, no—” you protest breathlessly, “—you asked if it was okay, and then I said—”
“You said it was good. It’s not good if you didn’t cum,” he grunts quietly, and the tip of his finger now drawing tight circles over your clit makes it damn near impossible to argue. “I didn’t fuck you right if you didn’t cum. You should be fucked right.”
“Maker, you fuck me exactly how I need to be fucked,” you whimper, tilting your head until your lips are pressed against the curve of his helmet while his hand steadily works under your pants. “And—oh, fuck, that’s… h-however you need to fuck me.”
“Fuck—obedient little thing…” he huffs, starting to rub harder over your clit. “What I need is for you to cum. From now on, you’ll tell me. Say yes.”
“Yes,” you moan into the beskar, your eyes fluttering back at the slowly building pressure.
“Say, ‘yes, Din,’” he breathes.
“Yes, Din,” you dutifully repeat, lifting your hips up against his hand, and he groans softly through the modulator.
“Say, ‘Din, I need something to cum on’,” he whispers.
You’re delirious, you don’t even catch it before most of it is already out of your mouth. “Din, I need something to c—” you cut off but he’s already reaching down between your bodies to ease his cock out, before yanking your pants down your ass just enough to position himself up against your entrance.
He rocks his hips up and he slides in easier than ever before, and you… don’t know what you’re expecting, but he surprises you nonetheless. He doesn’t start thrusting into you at all. Even though he’s rock hard inside you, thick and pulsing and breaking you open, he doesn’t move a single inch. He just keeps himself there, continuing to rub circles around your clit and giving you exactly what he prompted you to ask for.
Something to cum on.
Your body tenses and squeezes him, and Din shushes you before you realize you were making noise. His free hand comes up to settle tight over your mouth and guide you turn your head away from his helmet. At first you think it’s because your heavy breathing was probably fogging the visor up, but no—his fingers leave your pussy for a split second and you hear him maneuver himself out of it. The hollow noise it makes thunking to the ground is beginning to become your favorite sound in this universe.
But then of course, Din buries his face into your neck and starts talking again, whispering low praises behind your ear with that bassy, dark chocolate rasp, and you have to remind yourself to keep breathing. His fingers return to your cunt to slowly rub your clit and his cock throbs hotter than sin inside you, building your pleasure into a strong, slow crescendo.
You start to whimper unintentionally, but his hand is wrapped tight around your mouth, muting and confining the desperate sounds to your throat. His finger presses down harder on your clit and his cock flexes inside you.
“That’s it, sw—sweet girl,” Din mutters, his voice interrupted by his own staccato breaths and tight gasps the longer he talks you through it, the longer he keeps himself perfectly still while engulfed in your drenched, fluttering cunt. “That’s—that’s it, I can feel it c-coming. Fuck—make it good for me, give me a good one—”
His words shove you right over a cliff you didn’t even realize was there until you were dangling over the steep drop for an extended moment like a cartoon. Everything squeezes around him unbearably tight—your hands dig into his forearms, your back arches up against him, your pussy constricts his thick cock until you feel like you’re hurting the both of you with it, and Din’s breath catches next to your ear while you’re both suspended in thin air for a split second—
—before you’re convulsing in pure bliss, flooding his cock with cum while he rasps out, “good girl,” into the crook of your neck and rocks his hips up into yours. The few heavenly inches of movement hits something jaw-dropping inside you and nearly makes you scream against his palm, launching your body even higher into mind-bending rapture. Fucking Maker, you cum hard for him, on him, around him. You downright drown his cock in your pleasure, suffocate it and work out the aching tightness in your pussy all over him until you feel like you can’t breathe anymore.
“Mmm…” Din murmurs quietly, continuing to circle your swollen clit hard through the shattering aftershocks. His voice is deep and sinful and vibrates your whole back with its frequency, but something underneath it also sounds as if he’s considering, before he seems to land on an answer to a wordless question he just asked himself. “…One more.”
And, like the fucking Maker himself commanded it, another blazing hot wave of fire suddenly rips you apart and sends you spasming rhythmically around the throbbing cock buried inside you once again. This one wrings you completely dry, robbing you of every sense. The ragged whine you make behind his hand must be too loud—his fingers quickly tighten around your jaw and lock down, keeping you as still as possible while you give him everything you have to give.
Eventually the sparks die out and you’re left a shell of what you once were, clamping down hard on him and shuddering your bliss at the night sky. He lays there silently under you, holding you as you fall back down to reality. Your breathing is a mess and so is everything below your waist, and your whole body jerks when Din carefully slides his hand from your pussy and rubs gently over your thighs, your tummy, your chest.
“That was…” you croak out, trying to remember how to speak, “ … g-good.”
“Go to sleep,” he whispers, pressing soft kisses against the side of your neck. You can hear the gentle grin he’s hiding from you, knowing he completely incapacitated you.
“But what about—” you start to protest, when Din’s teeth sink into your flesh and your pussy seizes up tight around him, making him choke a hoarse little groan into your skin.
After a moment, he eases his throbbing cock out of you, and he resets your clothing while you whimper in distress. “Go to sleep,” Din murmurs, before softly kissing your neck once more, and your eyes slowly droop against your will. Fuck, his body beats a king size mattress any day of the week. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”
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⊶ glazed & dazed (m) ⊷
Vanilla, that’s what you do best as one of the industry’s most loved stars. Only you want a change. Taking the plunge to taint your pure image, knowing so many fans would love to see it sullied, even if just for one movie.
There’s only one man for the job in your eyes. One you’ve always admired from afar, and the only one who’s perfect enough to take your innocence in the most fitting way. Seokjin Kim. Even more famous than you; a pro, a veteran, and someone you can’t wait to give your all for. Together you will be unstoppable.
pairing; kim seokjin x reader
genre; pornstar au, pornstar! Seokjin, pornstar! reader, explicit smut, romance, minimal angst, an actual plot! please don’t be fooled by the summary
⟶ Part of the Lights, Camera, Action collab!
warnings (!) this fic contains talk of a past manipulative relationship, explicit smut in the form of role played porn, that includes dom themes, submissive (to an extent) reader, use of degrading names/slut shaming, rough sex, light manhandling, minor spanking, oral sex, ass eating, ass fingering, deep throating, face fucking, dick slapping, throat bulge, facial, multiple orgasms, squirting, overstimulation, exaggerated dirty talk, feet are involved a little, breath play, external sexual use of a rolling pin, creampie.
disclaimer; the smut in this fic is for the filming of a porn movie, things are enhanced and exaggerated. While I have tried to portray some real life issues and problems that adult film stars go through, the plot of this fic barely skims the surface. There are also inaccuracies with how realistic the plot is, but this is fiction, written for enjoyment. Please bear all this in mind. Thank you, and I hope you enjoy.
GLAZED&DAZED: Good girl gone bad XXX
Porn’s most loved good girl like you’ve never seen her before... Devoured by porn’s most filthy leading man... Buckle up everyone, you’re in for a (sweet) treat...
To get hired, there’s just one simple motto to remember: “The magic is always in the hole.”
You were restless. Had been for a while. The need for change itched away at you, and while you had been successful at ignoring it in the beginning, you quickly realised this was not a phase. The repetitive nature of your job was finally catching up to you, weighing too heavy…
Funny, not many people would class sex as a mundane task. But then again, they didn’t have to perform on camera. They didn’t have to commit to fucking for a living, sign a contract and say goodbye to normality… Perhaps in hindsight you had signed your life away, but you couldn’t let yourself think like that. You didn’t regret a thing and never would.
How could you when you were one of the best paid female stars in the industry? One of the most loved and well known in this generation.
You’d emerged from nowhere, nothing special in your own eyes, but something about you had sent the entire male population wild. You had no idea why. Just rolled with it. Had been rolling with it for five years now.
Aged just 22, your pure and nervy image had not been faked whatsoever, but that was what had stuck. How you had been marketed ever since. Ending up in porn had not been planned. You’d dated a guy called Jesse in your final year of college who owned his own agency. It wasn’t successful by any means but he made enough money to wow and spoil you at the time. Looking back, now having matured, you realised his game. He dated impressionable girls just to encourage them to join his company, but naïve you were and for a while you’d genuinely believed he’d loved you.
Still, soon an unambitious graduate from college, the beginnings of your adult life weren’t going as well as you’d imagined and the more money this guy tempted you with the easier it was to give in. It was too good to be true, and despite being extremely nervous he knew all the right things to say to encourage (coax) you.
You started off with solo films only. They were done in private at first, home video type of things under the watchful eye of Jesse, but quite quickly you found yourself in a studio, under hot lighting and the gaze of camera men and various staff.
Selling sex wasn’t how you expected your early twenties to go, you had always been conservative, only ever slept with two guys before and that included Jesse, so such a big production was daunting. You were nervous and suspecting. However, you couldn’t deny the rush that hit you every time the camera stopped rolling, your heart racing from your orgasm and your head buzzing with all the praise that followed.
Somehow, incredibly surprising to you, you were a hit. You didn’t even think Jesse had been expecting it, although he relished in your success for as long as you allowed. It was an odd feeling, becoming such a sensation for your body and your body alone, but puzzlingly it boosted your ego. Maybe you didn’t have much self-esteem to begin with. You’d never felt that desirable before and you let yourself get swept away with it all.
You were nicknamed porn’s Good Girl, demure beauty, innocent and uneasy. That looked good on film. Men loved it. Unsure eyes that slowly turned black with lust as you lost yourself to pleasure. You’d cum for whatever guy was watching, touching himself to. It was easy. Easy work, easy money.
Before long well know porn sites were featuring you on their home page, your name was everywhere, but it was very unusual at the time for an adult film star to only specialise in solo work unless they were amateur accounts, still was unusual actually. So you’d known what was coming. If you wanted to ride out the success for as long as possible you needed to give yourself fully to the industry. You took no persuading this time. By then you were blinded by flattery and pay cheques, and while having sex on camera was intimidating at first, you soon came into your own.
Loving Boyfriend Takes Girlfriend’s Virginity. That was the title of your first work, and soon the virgin concept became your persona. Losing it over and over again while the camera rolled, because there was nothing hotter for a simple-minded male.
You soon outgrew Jesse. By then it was obvious he’d never loved you but only loved what you had given him. Money, fame, expansion. He had it all because of you. The year-long contract you’d signed in the beginning ran out and you found another agency – Angel Entertainment. Lame name perhaps, but definitely a better, more professional company. The one you were still with now actually. They gave you want you deserved, a better cut, it was your hard work after all.
Jesse had tried his best to persuade you to stay with him, begged on his knees actually, a diamond encrusted ring in his hand, but you had shaken your head and laughed in his face. A man like him was incapable of love. He was only pleading with you because he was about to lose the one person who had given him everything. He was scared he’d be never able to replicate that. That only made you feel powerful.
You’d walked out of your shared apartment, one your money had paid for, and met the chauffeur downstairs waiting with your luggage. You left him with a parting blow sharp on your tongue. How did it feel watching countless men fuck me and know they were doing a better job than you ever could?
The dollar signs propelled you further. Love and adoration from strangers became the norm. Men would’ve flocked at your feet if they had the chance. Some women too. The porn you specialised in was for everyone, and it wasn’t long before sex became just a job. You no longer had any connection to it, no longer partook in the activity for fun nor love. You had no desire to find a lover to enter your bed or you heart, for that matter. All you needed was your close group of friends. It was a small group, you only had a few people you trusted in your life, but you liked it that way, and thankfully, despite their initial shock, your parents continued to support and cherish you. You were one of the lucky ones really, others had it much worse.
Without the distractions of love and relationships, you busied yourself with work. Immersed yourself in the trade. For someone who lacked ambition when they were younger, you sure made up for it during the next four years. You diligently built your empire, your fortune – websites, sex toys, merchandise… the list went on.
Your filmography stacked up quickly after you exploded onto the scene. Lame and cringeworthy titles that often belittled your hard work, but it was hardly worth thinking about. What was it to you if it got everyone clicking and spending their money?
Young Couple Makes Love. Childhood Sweethearts Fuck For The First Time. Polyamorous Couple Find A New Lover. Shy Girl’s First Lesbian Experience. Best Friends Explore One Another’s Bodies – because what was better than one innocent beauty? Two, of course!
But no one did it like you. The girls might’ve had a part to play when the camera was rolling but they had a bunch of films under their belt that denounced any such title. They could record the most vanilla scene one day and then the next they were getting gangbanged by seven men. Their image wasn’t consistent. Yours was. And that was your selling point.
You stayed innocent, despite everything. This industry was competitive, especially for women, but your image never changed. A pure, harmless virgin. You had never been face fucked. Had never had your hair pulled hard. Had never had you ass spanked raw and had never had two guys fuck you in each hole. Hell, you’d never even been fucked up the ass before. You’d stayed vanilla, and while there was something so easy about that, now you were finding yourself uninterested.
You were bored. Every time the same damn thing. You were beginning to wonder if you were just sick of this lifestyle altogether. It was the tiniest of thoughts, one you didn’t want to concentrate on, but sometimes it snuck past and settled in the forefront of your mind. Heavy and unnerving. This couldn’t be it. Not when you still had it good. You’d be a fool to throw it all away… But your uncertainties refused to shift.
And so you began thinking. Cogs starting to turn.
Your contract was nearing to a close and you kept delaying the resign. The thing was you loved your agency, they had treated you well over the years and always had your best interests at heart, always ran things by you before organising a shoot. You were close to all the staff and the rest of the girls signed too. Angel Entertainment was like one big family, you appreciated them a lot, and yet there was still something holding you back from renewing that contract…
It wasn’t like you were searching for something new either, despite still being in demand. Irene, your best friend and manager, couldn’t even go a day without getting an email from some agency citing their desire to have you as a client, but you couldn’t find it in you to be enthusiastic. No matter how much she tried to encourage you and make you see the array of possibilities the future could hold.
Instead, there was something else on your mind. A last ditch attempt to regain the passion you once had. A project that could change things forever…
It was time to taint that pure image of yours.
It was long overdue in your eyes, and you knew so many of your fans would love to see it. Their thoughts weren’t so clean no matter how much they proclaimed they loved your sweet image. Some would love to see someone fuck the living hell out of you, and of course, imagine it was them. It was actually a wonder how they’d been patient for so long… You’d seen enough comments online to write a book.
I’d love to see a cock in her ass. Her choking on a big fat dick would just about kill me. I’d spank her silly. Just to name but a few… There were much worse.
They spoke about you like you weren’t a real person, and somewhere along the line you’d just gotten used to it. You were a service, there to serve them, so what better way was there? At this point in your career it seemed just as big of a turn on to you than you’d maybe like to admit. You craved the exhilaration, even if it was just for one movie. You’d reached the point in your career where you were itching for more. Itching for change…
You had one man in mind. The only man for the job in your eyes.
A living legend in the industry. Pornstar seeming such a small and lacking title to describe a man who had been expertly fucking women with his giant dick on camera for over ten years. He was definitely more famous than you, a pro, some would say veteran, and you would admit that freely. He was someone you’d always admired from afar, and for him to take that onscreen innocence of yours just seemed fitting. It would blow peoples’ minds, you were sure of it.
Your paths had never crossed, despite living and working in the same city. For obvious reasons really. Your areas of expertise were vastly different. While you were vanilla – softcore, Seokjin was the complete opposite. His speciality in sex was of the hardcore kind. Scenes with him were enough to make even you blush, and you’d been having sex on camera for half a decade. You were night and day. Putting you both in a movie together had never made sense. It wouldn’t have ever worked.
So you got to work, running it by Irene one night over drinks. She was dubious at first, questioning if you were having some type of quarter life crisis. Maybe you were, who knew, but you couldn’t get the idea out of your head.
You valued her opinion greatly, she had been your rock for many years, and you were incredibly close. It was a closeness you would never be able to replicate with anyone else. She’d watched you have sex so many times. That really did bond two people together, put it that way.
So, as well as always considering her thoughts, she also considered yours and heard you out. That’s why you worked so well together.
By the end of the night she’d come around.
The thought of running the idea by your agency had been daunting to say the least. You’d been ready for them to laugh you out of the office, but surprisingly, they actually took little to no persuading. Even Irene was shocked. You couldn’t help but wonder. They either thought you had no plans to renew, or unfortunately, they guessed your innocent act may not make them money forever. There were no hard feelings if it was the latter. It was all about evolving, wasn’t it? You couldn’t stay the same forever.
And anyway, maybe if this movie with Seokjin happened, you’d renew and begin a whole new life in the world of porn…?
Irene made short work of contacting Moon Studios, the agency Seokjin was under. An almost deceptive company name, yet one of the only acceptable ones. It was really quite pretty. The process of sending emails back and forth was daunting, Irene carefully wording your intentions and the potential prospects such a pairing like you and Seokjin could bring. You very nearly backed out at one point, but to your surprise, they nor he did not decline outright. In fact, Seokjin was very eager to discuss things over dinner… Personally.
And so your plan was one step closer to becoming a reality.
The day of the dinner came around quickly and you were oddly nervous. You had made it very clear how you wanted this to be a personal, independent job. That you wanted to spend significant time discussing and storyboarding the movie yourself, so of course you were thrilled he understood that and wanted to meet up. You just hadn’t expected the one on one just yet. Usually these things were discussed between manager and manager, not adult star and adult star. The only interaction you usually had was when you met up to shoot. This way was a lot more nerve wracking, but you knew you had to get used to it if this was to potentially go ahead.
Despite being the complete opposite, it almost felt like you were getting ready for a first date. Not that you could remember such a feeling. It had been a long time since you’d dated anyone, so long ago that you often wondered if you’d ever get the chance again. Dating and relationships seemed like something your future would never hold at this point, and somewhere along the line you’d become okay with that…
Still, you could faintly remember the nervous buzz a first date brought and that’s what you were feeling right now as you applied your mascara in the mirror. These nerves were something else entirely though, of course. You were going to discuss sex. You were going to try and convince this man to make a movie with you. It was a pretty terrifying thought. You’d grown confident over the years, but this was a totally brand new situation.
Irene had text you the location of the restaurant this morning, Seokjin in charge of the reservation, and had warned you to dress fancy. This place was no Cheesecake Factory google soon informed you. You hadn’t worn a dress in months, and that had only come about because you were forced to attend the AIA’s; a tacky award ceremony filled with mostly vulture like men hiding behind a professional title.
You were beginning to realise your distaste for the industry had always been there, in the back of your head, it was only lately that it had made itself louder…
You took an Uber there, hardly flashy but that had never been you, so why change now? You would have driven yourself but you’d probably need a glass (read: bottle) of wine during dinner just for some Dutch courage, even if it was a bad idea.
You attempted sophistication when you made your way to the reception area of the restaurant, beginning to regret the size of your heels halfway there, and relayed Seokjin’s surname to the host, clutching your purse uneasily. What if he wasn’t here? What if he wasn’t coming at all? They were dumb fears but they were still there. However, they soon disappeared when the host smiled and nodded, calling a female colleague over to lead you to your table. You didn’t miss the way his eyes washed over you a little longer than they should though, the faint look of recognition on his features. He was wondering how he knew you. It no longer fazed you, you got that surprisingly a lot. It was just one of those things. This man had watched you get fucked… and maybe he’d watch you get fucked by Seokjin soon enough…
Your table was in another room, cut off from the busier main area. It held a few tables but tonight it was just Seokjin and you. He sat waiting for you at the furthest table and he stood once you entered. Your waiter turned to leave, telling you to ring the bell when you were ready to order and you thanked her, Seokjin joining you. And then you were alone.
You stood in the entrance way like someone lost. You had not expected this to be so intimate. You had expected other customers eating around you, not just you and he alone. Light music played from the speakers, the only thing filling the silence until Seokjin smiled, stepping forward, around the table to greet you. “Good Evening.”
“Good Evening.” You found yourself easing immediately, smiling back. It was hard not to upon hearing his voice. It was so gentle, so polite. The complete opposite of his on camera persona. The filth that flew from his mouth was unholy. Here, he looked like every mother’s dream son in law.
There were a few details you’d forgotten to offer up regarding Seokjin, which seemed absurd because it was the first thing anyone noticed. He was ridiculously handsome. Like out of this world handsome. Drop dead gorgeous most would say. Enough to make any woman or man weak at the knees while in his presence. Or maybe that was just you right now. You walked forward, desperate to sit down.
“Oh, let me hang up your coat,” Seokjin offered, and you stopped, lowering the black textile off your bare shoulders. This room was comfortably warm, now all you had to worry about was breaking out into a sweat. He handled the garment with care, attaching it to one of the bronze hooks beside the entrance door while you took a seat, tucking yourself in discreetly.
You definitely didn’t have to worry about over dressing tonight. Seokjin was in a black two piece suit, the jacket sinfully figure hugging, stretched over his broad shoulders, the dress shirt underneath crisp and white, loose at the neck. His hair was parted to the side, his usual style, black locks sleek. He was a distinguished man. Somehow soft yet angular. It just depended what way the light caught him, and age had been kind to him. He wasn’t much older than you, perhaps five years or so, but he didn’t look a day past 25.
The strong arch of his eyebrows almost made you feel intimidated as he made his way back to the table and sat in front of you, so much so, you had to look away from his gaze, spotting a glass of iced mineral water already waiting for you. You picked it up and sipped, wetting your dry throat.
“Sorry, I didn’t know what you drunk else I would have ordered something a little stronger to start off with,” he apologised with another smile.
“That’s okay,” you reassured.
“Here, take the drinks menu. There’s plenty to choose from.”
“Thanks.” You took it from him, catching his eyes as you did so and he chuckled.
“Sorry, I’m acting weird. I’m nervous.”
Your eyes widened a little in surprise. He was nervous? You weren’t going to lie, that made you feel a lot better.
“It’s really nice to meet you.” He continued, laughing louder this time. “I’m honestly pretty awestruck.”
You nearly snorted. You were the only one allowed to be awestruck, surely? You shooed him away with a hand. “Please. Shouldn’t I be the one lost for words? The man, the legend.”
“That’s just nonsense.”
You were both laughing now, embarrassing one another. The apples of his cheeks were tinged pink, a reaction you had not been expecting from a man like him, and you lifted your hand up to your face just to check how hot you were, wondering if you were blushing too.
“No, honestly. I’m a fan of your work,” he told you earnestly. You must have looked unconvinced because he chuckled again. “Don’t look so dubious. Can’t take a compliment?”
“Actually, that’s never been a strong point of mine,” you admitted. Plus, it seemed pretty crazy that The Seokjin Kim was a fan of what you made. You were polar opposites. Wasn’t your stuff way too tame for him?
“So, do you have any questions?” You asked, puzzling how you should start this discussion, wanting to divert the attention away from you. This was all new to you, and you were trying to fight through your awkwardness.
He smiled. “Let’s order first. Get to know one another a little.” You watched him pick up the main menu that laid next to him. “I want you to be comfortable. I don’t want you to think of this as a business deal, more so, hm…” He paused to search for the right words, smile turning into a grin when they came to him, “an agreement between friends.”
You dipped your head, smiling coyly. It was hard not to agree with that.
“Now, any thoughts on that drink?” He prompted.
You spent half the dinner getting to know one another, nerves slowly depleting as you laughed and joked. Despite already hearing all these good things about Seokjin, nothing could prepare you for how truly well-spoken and well-mannered he was. He was charming but definitely not with intent. He was easy to be around, a warming presence. You spoke about mindless things really, hobbies, favourite tv shows, books you were currently reading. If anyone could see you, they’d probably think you were on a first date. In reality you were here to discuss the deal of a lifetime.
You were halfway through the main course when Seokjin brought the topic up again, intrigued and impressed that you were so determined to take the reins with this project. You had made sure his agency was aware of that. How much work would go into the discussing and creating of this movie. How close you would work together, and how you were willing to do just about anything. You had chosen Seokjin because of this. He was known in the scene for being extremely professional and respectful. To both the actresses and staff, and you had kept that all in mind – and on top of that, he had been in this industry for just over a decade. He knew how things worked, and despite not knowing him personally, there was a trust there when it came to that. You looked up to him.
You thought about telling him all this, but it just seemed all too formal. You were embarrassed. Would he think that you were being over the top? Over stepping boundaries? However despite you reluctance to open up, he seemed more than excited about this offer, which surprised you. In the greatest of honesty, you hadn’t even expected to get this far, predicting an email where his agency declined the offer, not that of a dinner invitation with the man himself.
“I have to say though, I’m surprised it’s me you want,” he admitted almost, what was that…bashfully?
You watched him over the rim of your wine glass, taking a sip before you replied. He hadn’t consumed any alcohol tonight, driving here himself, so you were actually still on your first and only drink, in fear of overdoing it and making a fool of yourself. You didn’t drink often so you were a bit of a lightweight.
“You were the only choice.”
You could hear your heart beating against your ribcage, but thought what the hell? Why were you so scared to let him know how much you wanted him to be your co-star? He was perfect for the job and you knew you’d be great together. You told him just as much.
“Well,” he gobsmacked, chuckling lowly. “I’m truly speechless right now. Incredibly flattered, but speechless.”
You dropped your head. “I know I’m not what you’re used to but this is my chance for some change. I truly want this, and it would be just as much your project as it is mine,” you reassured.
You’d gladly let him take charge. You had so much to learn from him.
He smiled your way, and you took a shaky breath, needing to know his answer. “So what do you say?”
He paused, smile widening. “I say it sounds fun. I’m in.”
“Really?” You almost gasped, too excited to hide your reaction. Relief flooded over you.
“I think it would be great. Honestly, shooting anything with you would be an honour. You never know,” he laughed, “maybe it’s time I had a shakeup too. I can pull off softcore, right?”
You burst out laughing, realising how unflattering it might look at the last second and shot your hand up to your mouth in a bid to stop yourself, but he laughed freely, not caring what you thought. He had a cute laugh, almost dorky, despite his untouchable appearance.
“You could pull off anything.” You told him.
“So could you,” he told you, turning serious, the genuineness in his voice making you shift in your seat awkwardly. “Trust me, I don’t have some crazy expectations when it comes to the women I work with. I think you’re amazing and I would be honoured to work with you. I’m honoured that you thought of me at all actually, and…” He trailed off, hesitating. “Actually, I think I should let you know something…”
You raised your eyebrows, curious, unable to guess what he wanted to disclose. You waited patiently.
“I’m going to be retiring soon.”
Your jaw dropped. “Y-You’re what?” That you had not been expecting.
Seokjin was the It man in porn. You could never imagine him leaving the industry. Men often had it easier like that. Not that they didn’t have struggles, not that you didn’t hear stories, but when it came to longevity, it was easy being a man in porn. Women had a sell by date. In fact, at 27 you were probably near pushing it yourself. Only a certain few kept their fame for decades, and then they were boxed in, stuck doing the same type of movie over and over. The thought made you suddenly bitter. You didn’t want to be boxed in any longer.
“It’s my time. I’ve been here far too long,” he shrugged.
Mood dropping, you looked across at him sadly. You felt funny, couldn’t put your finger on it.
“But can you keep it quiet?” He asked. “It’s something I’ve been discussing with my agency. I don’t know when it’ll happen yet, but I thought you should know.”
You nodded, feeling a little wooden from the shock, but you quickly forced yourself to smile. “Secret’s safe with me. Honest.” He didn’t even have to tell you, but you appreciated it. Didn’t really understand why he had in the first place.
“Secret,” he repeated, amused. “It’s funny, right? Usually something like this would benefit the both of us, help sustain our careers, but I’m calling time and you’re,” he paused, watching you carefully as he continued. “I guess you want a change in direction?”
A change in direction? Did you want that? You didn’t know what you wanted. In a way you were lost, not bored. He was still watching you, as if searching for some kind of reaction. Some kind of answer.
“Fucking me will change everything, you know,” he told you finally with a tilt of his head. “But I think that’s what you want, right?”
Change. You think that sounded better. One word. One feeling.
Just what type of change did you want?
After that, things began to pass by in a blur.
After dinner, Seokjin had offered to give you a ride home to which you’d accepted. You’d said goodnight in his car, excited for what was to come, and the next day you’d both flown into action. First came the meetings with your agencies, discussing the ins and outs of your agreement as a contract was drawn up. That was the mundane part, but of course it had to be done. Seokjin’s agency hadn’t wanted to give you both so much leeway at first, but after some convincing they finally gave in. Your pairing would be powerful, of course they could see that. Whatever you made people would lap up, so why not let you guys decide what it would entail. It wasn’t like you were both newbies, you had years of experience between you.
This film was something important to you, for reasons you couldn’t really understand nor explain yet, and you wanted it to be perfect. Seokjin agreed.
Next came even more meetings. Seokjin and you couldn’t be left to your own devices just yet, there was still so much to learn and understand. Trends for one. You had plenty of meetings going through and understanding the latest sordid sex themes and acts that got the consumers going. It was interesting in ways, and something you’d never really thought about, but still, marketing was not a line of work you would ever choose to do for a living.
Especially when it entailed finding out details along the vein of what country had a thing for feet more...
One thing was for sure, you had a clear view of what direction you wanted this movie to go. Your interests lied in the wacky. Years of basic plot had taken its toll on you, and you spent many an hour watching (and skimming) through porno after porno trying to gain inspiration for where you wanted your own film to go. Parody had always been your favourite, because, sex ignored for a moment, they were honestly really entertaining. A lot of hard work went into making and directing those type of movies, not to mention the props were epic. A $3000 Iron Man suit? Come on, that shit was cool.
Actually, Seokjin had played Iron Man himself in the creatively named Iron Man XXX. In fact, Seokjin was incredibly well known in the parody scene. You’d heard somewhere he’d been an acting major when he began porn, you didn’t know if that was true, but it made sense. A lot of his best works were movie spoofs. Your favourite was a Cinderella parody he’d filmed a few years ago. Getting fucked by a prince that hot seemed like the dream. That was actually how you found out who he was. New on the scene, you had no clue who was who, finding out there were celebrities in the porn world was baffling, but you understood Seokjin’s appeal immediately.
You wanted to write and direct something totally different to what you normally shot, and not only sexually. You wanted the plot to be out there, wild, weird if needed. Sadly though, parodies were way out of your budget, which was obvious, nor were they really doable with just the two of you, but it definitely got you and Seokjin brainstorming.
It was while you were brainstorming you also started to think about your future a lot more too. Seokjin’s confession back at the restaurant stayed with you, and it wasn’t like he brought it up again – he didn’t – it was just his words stayed with you.
It’s my time. I’ve been here far too long.
You still felt sad, almost sick, when you remembered them, and you realised it wasn’t just because you felt for him, it was because you were in the exact same boat. You felt for him because you were going through that now. You weren’t just bored, you were over it.
Over this life. Over porn.
The lost feeling you had been feeling for months began to disappear once you realised that…
“You know you said that thing the first time we met?”
You were being cryptic, awkward as you tried to start conversation up with Seokjin who was sat across from you.
You were in the middle of your final brainstorm, having narrowed the movie down to three ideas and had been in the office for nearly six hours now, developing the plots and in the end picking them all apart. You both were perfectionists it seemed.
He looked up from his laptop, a bemused smile on his face. “Elaborate. I said a lot of things.”
You shook your head with a hushed laugh. “About how–” You hesitated, coming over all nervous, but you pushed on. You needed to say this out loud. You needed to tell somebody instead of just thinking it in your head. “About how fucking you would change everything.”
You watched his expression closely, waiting for it to change. He pondered for a moment but that was all, regarding you steadily. “Mm. And I said that’s what you want?”
He knew. You could see it on his face and felt relief flood over your whole body. He’d known already that you wanted out. Even before you had. What had given it away? The way you spoke about your job? The way you’d approached him to shoot together? The look in your eyes? It could’ve been a handful of things.
You gave a short little shrug. “I know there’s no going back.”
“No more vanilla or no more at all?” he asked carefully, still watching you. He already knew the answer but he was being polite.
You smiled. It didn’t falter as you spoke. “You said your time is up. I think mine is too.”
And just like that it felt like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders. Just to say it out loud. Just to say it to someone. Someone who was feeling the same. It was comforting.
“You knew that, though,” you added, because not even he could pretend to be shocked.
“I had a hunch, yes,” he smiled. “Sorry. I didn’t want to say anything that night at the restaurant. Not when it felt like you were still figuring things out. What made you realise?”
You looked down, feeling a little embarrassed. “It was what you told me actually. About retiring soon. It made me feel…weird…?” You struggled to find the correct words. “I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and what you said about change.”
“It’ll be a big change.”
You didn’t know if he was agreeing with you or warning you. Breaking out of porn wouldn’t be easy. A shock to the system, but you knew you were ready. It would be hard, but you wanted this. “I’m bored,” you told him.
You hoped you weren’t oversharing, but Seokjin was just so easy to talk to. The past couple of weeks had been fun. He was a really funny guy and always had you laughing at something or other, but more than that, he was just a soothing presence. You felt safe with him, confident. When his agency had told you this project was too ambitious at the start, warned you against it, basically insinuated that you weren’t able enough to do it, Seokjin fought for it, encouraged you along the way. He had been this venture’s number one supporter, and for that you were really thankful.
Afterall, he was the sole reason you’d come to this conclusion right now. You felt brave enough to confess, to confide in him. You hadn’t even told Irene how you felt yet, despite how much you loved her. Seokjin understood what you were going through better than anyone, so you hoped he didn’t mind you getting serious for a moment.
He didn’t of course.
“I understand,” he comforted.
“I thought I was doing this to gain back that excitement, to gain that high again, but…”
“It’s not working,” he finished for you.
You nodded slowly. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m looking forward to this, it’s just…” You trailed off, thinking of how you could explain yourself. “It’s just for entirely different reasons than I first thought.”
You’d been under the impression this would give you a newfound passion for work once again, shaking up your career, what you were used to. Changing the image that had been ingrained into you for years, but that wasn’t happening… If anything this was feeling more and more like the lead up to the end. A giant send off, one last hurrah... Maybe deep down you’d known this, you were just in denial until you met Seokjin.
“It’s okay, you know,” he smiled softly, reaching his hand across the table to give yours a comforting squeeze. You felt warmth from his touch, his soft skin. “To want to let go. You’ve been doing this for what, five years?”
You nodded slowly and he let go, moving to close his laptop, a polite action that showed he was giving his all to this conversation. “Yeah, five years or so,” you replied.
“That’s impressive in its own right. Most girls last what? One, two years tops. This industry spits women out like they’re disposable.” He almost sounded disgusted. No, scrap that. He did sound disgusted. “There’s always someone better. Someone prettier, someone younger.”
You glanced down, everything he was saying was true. Especially with your area of expertise. Playing it safe wasn’t how porn worked, but for you, it seemed it did. Funny how you’d gotten bored first before your audience had.
“I mean, I can’t say shit,” Seokjin shrugged. “I’ve willingly been here for over a decade, I don’t think I’m allowed to have an opinion on something like that, but I just… This industry consumes you, makes you feel like it’s the best option. The only option.”
He was right again. For the past five years porn had been your life. While you had plenty of friends in and out of this world, you hadn’t had a relationship since Jesse. In that absence you concentrated on work. Falling in love wasn’t everything, you understood that, but truthfully, none of this was how you’d expected your life to go. The further away you got from meeting someone and falling in love, the more impossible it seemed. The only constant in your life was this industry. That was a scary thought. You didn’t want to depend on it. You wanted a normal life at some point.
“How old were you again? When you started up?” If you were feeling jaded then you dreaded to think how he must be feeling. It was comforting to have such common ground, but you felt sorry for him all the same. He was speaking from the heart.
Young. Younger than when you had begun.
“Is that young? I can’t even remember anymore,” he chuckled. You startled, hadn’t even realised you’d said it out loud.
“I think it is. Most people think it is. You were still in college, right?”
“Yeah.” His chuckle was quieter. “I was auditioning for random things here and there, mainly commercials. Just for some extra cash to see me through, and somehow found myself shooting amateur.” He snorted before carrying on... “I don’t know what I was thinking but I was young and I didn’t understand the weight of my decision back then.”
Ah, so the actor thing was true. Your mind whirred, as curious as ever. “So, you regret going into porn?”
You suddenly felt very nosy, felt the need to apologise. “Sorry about the 21 questions.”
You just couldn’t help but ask. Regret was something you were thinking of a lot lately. It was something you didn’t particularly understand if you felt or not, but you were confused, and it was something you were struggling with. Hearing Seokjin’s thoughts on the matter could help you.
“It’s okay. It’s good to talk about things like this,” he smiled. “But no, I don’t regret it. I can’t regret it. I’ve been doing this for a third of my life and I refuse to regret something that had such a big impact on me.”
His conviction was admirable. It gave you a lot to think about.
“I just… The longer I stay I find myself growing bitter, and I don’t want that,” he sighed. “I want to look back on my life and say I lived it well.”
You smiled softly, touched by his words. “I understand completely.”
“What about you? I don’t know much about how you… came to be.” He struggled and then laughed at his chosen choice of words.
You joined in before falling silent. You never had been good at talking about yourself. Especially with a subject like this. However, you felt safe with Seokjin, aware he didn’t seem the type to judge or disregard you. Besides, he’d already shared so much with you.
“Um. I was with this guy in my last year of college…” You heard your voice shake, nervous, but ignored it. “He was a little bit older than me, and I let him sweep me off my feet, thought he was a nice guy. He wasn’t.” Pausing to scoff, you rolled your eyes. “He had this company, agency, whatever you want to call it. I realised later that he dated girls in a bid to get them to join. I guess it worked on me, but then again,” you shrugged, “I had the last laugh.”
Seokjin’s lips tugged up slightly, amused. “He wasn’t expecting you to blow up?”
You laughed. “Nope.” You opened your mouth to say something else, but what? There was plenty you could continue with but what was the point? That was your story, every detail in between seemed irrelevant after all these years, or so you told yourself. “I’m sorry, I’ve never actually told many people about that. I guess I’m still trying to understand what happened to an extent. Trying to figure things out.”
He nodded, voice genuine. “I’m sorry that happened to you.”
“It is what it is,” you shrugged off. You weren’t the first girl to have it happen to you and you wouldn’t be that last. The thought was infuriating but you pushed it aside. “Like I said, I had the last laugh, and the last I heard he’d run his agency into the ground so.”
“Sounds like that fucker deserved it.”
You grew surprised. During these past couple of weeks of getting to know Seokjin you couldn’t recall a time you’d heard him swear quite like that. He was a far cry from his pornstar persona, so to hear that much malice in his voice was jarring.
“Jesse was a dick, yeah,” you agreed with a chuckle. It still felt odd saying his name out loud. You hated it. Hated that he still stuck with you in some ways.
“Sooo…” Seokjin regarded you, dragging out the syllable. “Do you have regrets?”
Ah, that age old question. You hadn’t had an answer until you’d heard Seokjin’s. It made sense of all your conflicted feelings and worries.
“I think I feel the same way you do,” you replied carefully. “I realise now that everything I’ve been feeling for these past few months was for a reason. I should leave before I grow to hate this place.”
Angel Entertainment had been like another home to you these past few years but you knew if you stayed here any longer you would begin to sour, and that you didn’t want. You didn’t want this safe place and family to be ruined for you.
“So you’re really gonna retire too?” Seokjin asked with a tilt of his head.
Doubt, uncertainty, it was still there. When he said it aloud like that you felt it in your gut. “Do you think I should?”
Seokjin smiled. “I don’t think my opinion matters.”
To you it did. Yes, he couldn’t make the decision for you, but you valued his input. You were alike in life experience, alike in thoughts and feelings, and you were just really glad you had met him through this. You were really glad you were doing this with him, because you were scared. Scared of what this movie meant to you, scared if it was your last and scared of what the future held for you. When Seokjin spoke he didn’t seem afraid and that’s how you wanted to feel.
“Porn is my life, Seokjin,” you almost whispered. “What do I do without it?”
He reached for your hand again, giving it a loving squeeze. “I think there’s plenty you can do without it.”
You smiled at him, genuinely appreciative.
“You’re scared right now, that’s okay.” It was like he could read your mind, or just, he had been through these rush of emotions already. “It’s a big step but you’ll be fine. Trust me. You’re amazing, how would you not be?”
You chuckled, feeling your cheeks heat up and slowly removed your hand from under his, giving it a couple of grateful taps. “Thank you.” You leaned back, eyes flickering over your laptop screen. You were supposed to be working but you’d been browsing through Postmates trying to find something to eat for the last twenty minutes before you’d both gotten thoroughly distracted.
“Hm,” you thought out loud. “Do you think my bachelor’s in psychology is probably outdated by now?”
“I don’t think they grow outdated,” Seokjin laughed, tilting back in his chair too. His hair was casual today, falling against his forehead, making him appear younger – not that he really needed help in that department. “It could come in handy somewhere. My film and acting degree did.”
You snorted. “Exactly, for porn!”
“Hey,” he exclaimed, before laughing loudly. “Okay, I admit, I was lucky there. No Hollywood actor has ever played as many superheroes as I have. The decade long career I’ve had in porn has been worth it just for that.”
“Can’t disagree with that.” His laugher was infectious, and it didn’t help that he was genuinely one of the funniest people you’d ever met.
“You could go back to school if you want, learn something new?” He suggested after a few moments, still eager to help.
“Sure,” he shrugged. “The world is your oyster. The real question is: What is porn without you?”
“Please,” you brushed off.
He grinned and then shook his head, growing thoughtful as he held eye contact. “In all seriousness though, you are not just porn. Don’t let it define your future.”
Your lips curled in thanks, attention soon back on the subject of food as Seokjin took a cell phone break. You scrolled, something catching your eye. Your favourite bakery a few blocks away. It was nearly 3pm and you hadn’t had lunch yet. Was it okay to skip savoury and go straight for dessert? You’d always had a sweet tooth ever since you were a kid.
Oh. An idea suddenly shot itself into the forefront of your mind. This was it. Your lightbulb moment.
“Hey,” you glanced up at Seokjin. He popped his head up from his phone, eyebrows raised and intrigued. “I think I have a new idea.”
You finally had your idea. After two weeks of brainstorming you finally had something concrete. It wasn’t the craziest by any means, like you’d wanted in the beginning, but that didn’t matter. It was perfect. Seokjin agreed wholeheartedly. That’s why you knew this idea was the one. It felt right for both of you. When you knew, you knew.
You’d even come up with a title immediately, as you were scoffing down the doughnuts from Spongy Affair – which if you thought about it, was a pretty raunchy name for a bakery in the first place. Destiny you could call it, because the plot you’d thought up took place in its very own bakery. Glazed & Dazed. The name, the title. A job interview turned sexual… Cliché and just perfect. Seokjin would rock a baker’s uniform, you just knew it.
Now that the plot was finalised, both your agency’s approving the idea, it was time to take lessons in storyboarding and script writing. If you were being honest, they were pretty boring. The dialogue in porn wasn’t exactly Shakespeare, but yet Seokjin and you still had to sit through two days’ worth of PowerPoints and note taking. Still, it definitely showed you how much work went into these movies, how many people got together to work on them. It got you thinking…
In fact, you’d been thinking hard ever since your heart to heart with Seokjin. Your future was still up in the air but you may have found a solution to that… It would be difficult and tiring, you were sure, but something was back, burning inside you, the inklings of the passion you’d missed for all these months… You needed to share, and again, Seokjin’s opinion meant a lot to you.
“So, I’ve been thinking,” you began slowly, elevator dinging open, the final signal of the end of the day for you both.
Seokjin glanced at you from the corner of his eyes, a mischievous grin settling across his mouth. “That sounds dangerous.”
“Shush,” you nudged him playfully and he chuckled, both beginning to walk towards the exit of the building. You waited to continue, passing by the security guard on your way out, saying good evening to him. Seokjin’s car was parked up in the opposite direction of yours, but he politely offered to walk with you, ready to listen to you.
“So, I know that I don’t want to do porn anymore,” you started up, feeling oddly nervous now. What if your idea was too stupid? What if you were dreaming too big?
Seokjin looked your way, waiting patiently but also silently giving you the reassurance to carry on. You opened your mouth taking a fairly loud breath. “I just don’t think I can leave everything behind like that. There’s just…” You sighed, struggling to find the words. A lot had been playing on your mind recently, ever since you’d realised this would be your last film.
“I see all these girls in the industry, they’re just like me when I first started. A little bit out of their depth, blinded by the attention. I just… I don’t want them feeling like I have these past few months. I mean, it’s good until it’s not, right?”
Seokjin nodded in reply. You could see it in his eyes he was curious as to where this was going. “So what are you planning to do, stay and talk them out of it?”
“Not exactly,” you answered carefully, your footsteps shortening as you arrived at your vehicle. You turned to face him, a nervous smile on your face. “What if I wanted to start an agency? My own company…” You paused, but not for long, babbling a little. “I could go to school for it or something. Like business school or something?” Truth be told, you didn’t even know if that was a thing.
Seokjin shrugged. “You could do.” He slipped a hand in his jeans pocket, rocking on his heels a little. “I mean not every person has to go to school to start their own company.”
“I know, but it’ll probably seem more professional, huh?” Honestly you were out of your depth, this idea had sprung upon you and you had no idea how to make it a reality. The world of business was new to you and you didn’t know if you had it in you to succeed.
Seokjin smiled wide, as if he found something adorable. You? No way. “I don’t think it would make a difference. You’ve had the experience yourself. You’re basically your own brand at this point, you could start a company tomorrow.”
Taken back by his words you just stared at him. He laughed. “Trust me. Knowledge out ways education in this instance.”
You considered his words, something to mull over later. Maybe you should invite Irene over, talk it through with her. She knew a lot about the adult entertainment industry. She would also be brutally honest with you. Seokjin on the other hand was too nice. Not that you thought he was appeasing you right now. You watched him carefully. “So you think it’s a good idea?”
“I think if you’re serious about this then yeah, it could be a good thing.” He tugged at the strings of his hoody as you tried to read his body language. You felt bad for being suspicious, but you’d rather he’d be honest with you.
While playing detective, you found yourself admiring his outfit. Seokjin dressed casually was a little jarring at first, mainly because you were so used to seeing him in clothes that emphasised his perfectly built body, but lately he had been dressing down. Maybe he was over countless days at the office, or maybe just maybe, it showed how comfortable he had grown around you. To think he wore this kind of thing around his house was cute in a way. Just imagining this famous porn star in sweats making dinner, reading a book, playing video games, it was comical.
He was still handsome though, regardless of what he wore. Always so effortlessly handsome…
“So, what will it be, a company for new actors or?”
You startled at his question, lost in thought for a moment but quickly came to. Seokjin was asking questions, sounding genuinely interested. Now you felt bad for trying to kick up that Psych degree for a sec.
You nodded. “For newbies, yeah. Just women though,” you added. You’d actually been thinking about this quite a bit. Mind too buzzed to fall asleep at night. “I think I could really try and make them understand the gravity of the situation. The decision shouldn’t be taken lightly and if they feel like they have no choice, I’ll let them know that there’s other options. That they don’t have to do it unless they one hundred percent want to.”
Seokjin regarded you for a moment, lips turning up slightly. A smile, but sort of sad. You jingled your car keys nervously in your hand. “Is that what you wish had happened to you?” That someone was there to talk you out of it?”
His question made you feel funny. You’d asked yourself that sometimes. Mainly when you were feeling sorry for yourself, thinking about your relationship with Jesse and how you’d been so naïve in the beginning. You’d even thought of it quite recently too, when you were feeling lost, confused over your future in porn… However these days, you had an answer. A sure, definite answer.
“I don’t know if anyone could have,” you breathed a laugh. “Jesse was a jackass, but I don’t hold him accountable for where I am now. I enjoyed what I did. I enjoyed the way it made me feel, and I enjoyed it for a really long time.” You didn’t have any regrets, Seokjin had made you understand that. You thought to tell him that but chickened out.
“But not every girl is like me, and that’s why I want to help if I can. I’m older and wiser than I was at 22, so if I can give my perspective to anyone who needs it, then…” You shrugged a little, trailing off with an embarrassed smile.
You couldn’t just turn your back on this world and never look back. You’d thought about it but it just didn’t feel right. If you had a chance to make the industry a little bit safer, a little bit warmer, then you wanted to try. Even if you failed. You told Seokjin just that, babbling on no doubt, apologising for keeping him.
“Honestly I think it sounds like an amazing idea. Perfect. I can’t imagine anything better for someone like you. It’s caring, and thoughtful, and helpful, and—
“Okay, okay,” you interrupted with a laugh. “What are you after? I already told you, I’m definitely not letting you fuck me in the ass.”
He instantly looked flabbergasted, mouth open wide before he laughed too. “I wasn’t trying to butter you up or anything. Honest.”
“I know. I was only messing around,” you teased, catching his eyes. You were always so in awe with how much they just naturally sparkled. He had really pretty eyes. “Thank you for saying such nice things, and for being so supportive of me and this whole project.”
He smiled warmly. “No problem.”
“I’m feeling really happy and excited for this new beginning.” It felt odd to admit that out loud, but right. It felt right.
His eyes twinkled harder. “I’m excited for you.”
“So definitely no anal?”
“Get lost,” you scoffed, pushing at Seokjin’s shoulder.
He playfully rubbed the spot, acting as if you’d hurt him. “And here I was thinking I was special.”
You rolled your eyes and got back to work, reading through the scenes you’d both come up with for what felt like the millionth time. You just wanted everything to be flawless. Up until this point in your life you hadn’t realised how much of a perfectionist you really were. All it took was some power and here you were, control freak your middle name. You didn’t know how Seokjin had put up with you these past few weeks.
You’d worked on this movie night and day, even resorting to skyping one another sometimes when you couldn’t meet up to work side by side. It was consuming you, not that you minded. Multiple people had told you, you were overworking yourself, that porn shouldn’t be this serious, but they didn’t understand. Not yet anyway. This was your last goodbye and you wanted it to be something you were proud of.
The scenes were plotted to the most minute detail. While most films had an average of five scenes, yours had an ambitious eight – as well as ambitious actions. The sex acts involved weren’t new to you. Just because you were softcore didn’t mean you hadn’t deepthroated a dick before, didn’t mean you hadn’t had your ass eaten out, or hadn’t been fucked on all fours. It was just… those things had been done with love and care. Glazed & Dazed would push you to your limits. It would be rough and exhausting. You were going straight into the deep end. Not many things would be excluded – although yes, anal was one of them. That was something you’d never done before, and while Seokjin had suggested it right at the beginning of planning, you hadn’t been so keen on the idea. Yes, it would make for good watching. Yes, men would lose their goddamn minds (and dicks), but it just wasn’t for you, and Seokjin accepted that completely. (Didn’t mean butt stuff was entirely off the cards though…)
With these scenes, came lots of dialogue too. Usually in the stuff you filmed, there would be lines right at the beginning, setting the scene and then you as actors were left to your own devices. Improvisation. It wasn’t difficult. A moan here, a moan there. Some “Oh baby, you’re making me feel so good”, “You’re so deep inside me, baby” and “You look so good while I’m fucking you” sufficed. This movie with Seokjin however, differed. The dialogue was sinful. Again, vanilla didn’t mean you couldn’t partake in some dirty talk, but this was next level. Seokjin was known for his vulgar mouth and for that, you wanted everything to be perfect. You had a full on script, and you needed it to be perfect ready for the director and camera men two weeks from today.
You could only do so much, and while tomorrow would signal the start of new responsibilities such as set and costume design, it was impossible to shoot the movie yourself. First, because you had zero experience with cameras and second, and probably more importantly, you were the one acting. You couldn’t be behind the camera as well when you were already in front of it. So you really did have your job cut out for you when you had to inevitably relay to the director how you wanted this film to go.
This evening was your last chance to run through the script, change anything needed before it got finalised tomorrow, so clearly, Seokjin and you were on your third coffee already, fighting through those yawns even though it was only 8pm. Everyone else had gone home hours ago and you were actually waiting for the cleaners to turn up, effectively kicking you out, but until then it was full steam ahead. Not that it was all work no play. Not half an hour ago you’d both been making paper aeroplanes and seeing whose could fly the furthest. It had actually gotten quite competitive – or you had gotten quite competitive. Seokjin’s crumpled and torn Hellflight 3000 peeked out from the trashcan, a sad reminder.
Despite your anxiety when it came to this movie; worries of its success and how it would be perceived, at least one positive thing would come out of it. Your friendship with Seokjin. These past few weeks you had grown close, comfortable with one another, and you hoped that would still last once this movie was done. Of course you still had lots of hard work to do; creative development, the actual filming, then onto editing. You still had more than a month together, but the idea of not seeing or talking to Seokjin practically every day made you feel a little glum. At that realisation, you glanced at him only to find he was looking in your direction anyway. He was talking.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Shoot,” you nodded.
He hesitated, seemingly unsure how he should word his question. You got a little nervous. “Are you doing this for your fans?”
Your brows pinched together, a little puzzled. “Doing what?”
“All this,” he laughed quietly, looking down at his laptop screen, the script open. “This is what a lot of guys want to see, let me tell you. Their deepest, darkest, most perverted fantasies all written down here in black and white.” He looked back at you. “Are you doing this for them?”
You took a moment to think. You knew the simple answer immediately, it was just a lot harder to breakdown and explain. You shrugged as you began. “Maybe it’s a goodbye gift, yeah. But also, I want to do this for me. Does that even make sense?”
Seokjin chuckled. You knew why. You were always doing it, needing approval, needing validation of some sort when it came to something you thought and felt, something you were unsure about. “Do you think it does? That’s the most important thing.”
You smiled, tilting your head to the side. “Yes.” It was time you started believing in yourself more. “I want to do this. I want to do this on my terms, for my enjoyment, and…” You trailed off, wondering if you should continue. You decided yes, yes you should. “I want to show everyone that I’m in charge of my own body. This is all my decision, and while yes, some…fans,” – it always felt weird saying that aloud – “will love it, I know just as many may be pissed and that gives me a satisfaction…?” Was that the correct word? “That makes me feel good. It’s like a big fuck you to anyone who thinks of me as an object.”
It was easy to feel like an object in an industry like this. No matter how lucky you had been with your experiences and fame, which of course you were thankful for, no one could ever escape the objectification. “I don’t know, I don’t think I’m making sense and I feel like a total bitch saying that.” You attempted to backtrack, afraid you were coming across as ungrateful.
Seokjin shook his head. “You’re definitely not a bitch,” he assured. “And you’re definitely making sense.”
That meant a lot. There you went again, seeking support when it came to your uncertainty. Most of the time you felt as though you shouldn’t think like that. Shouldn’t want to spite the metaphorical hand that fed you. After all you had chosen this career path, no matter how you fell into it. Every decision had been yours to make and yours alone, yet you couldn’t help the way you felt at times. It was okay to want to do something for yourself sometimes, and this movie was one of those things. On a much larger scale, so was retiring.
Seokjin was still looking your way, thinking hard it seemed, his expression unreadable. “What?” You asked, a small smile playing on your face. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
Your question knocked him from his thoughts and he shook his head, waving a dismissive hand. “It’s nothing.”
“No, come on,” you insisted, a little worried now. What was wrong? “Seokjin, tell me. Something’s on your mind. I want to know what.”
He looked a little awkward, aimlessly scrolling through the script as if to distract himself. “I don’t know, I just got worried this past week or so.” His voice was uncharacteristically quiet.
“Worried? About what?” You prodded gently.
His eyes flittered over your face. He was nervous, quite unlike him. “I was just thinking about everything you’d said these past few weeks…” Your back straightened on instinct, heart thudding a little faster. Why were you worried now?
“I realised something. What if you didn’t want to do this, not really, and I’d hate for you to feel like you were forced into this movie or something, or maybe you felt uncomfortable doing a lot of this stuff, and then I felt stupid because I’d never thought of it that way and…” He trailed off with a groan, rubbing his hand across his face.
He looked tired, you hadn’t realised until now.
“Sorry, I’m babbling like an idiot.” He apologised, looking your way now and reached for your hand on the table. He spoke slowly, staring into your eyes “Bottom line is, please don’t feel like you have to shoot this film.”
Your laugh surprised him, eyes shooting wide. He had not been expecting it. “Seokjin, wasn’t I the one who got in contact with you?” It wasn’t like he had accosted you to collab.
“Well yeah, but that doesn’t mean a thing,” he tried to argue. He squeezed your hand. “Just promise me this is what you want?”
You felt a warmth spread through you. He sounded so sincere, so serious, like he truly cared about you. You guess he did care. You felt a flutter. It was so foreign to you it was hard to place. You looked him straight in the eyes, adamant not to blink. “I promise.”
“Yeah?” He murmured.
You slipped your hand from under his and squeezed instead, smiling softly. “Yeah.”
Pulling away you leaned back in your seat, eyes skimming down part of the script on your laptop screen. It was full of filth, words you would never let any man utter to you in real life. But that was the whole point – maybe. This was porn. It wasn’t real, and if truth be told, you were nothing but excited for shooting day. Seokjin had no clue how excited you were. There was no uncertainty about that. Hadn’t he listened to a word you’d said already? You wanted this.
“Look, my intentions have changed since dinner that first night. I hadn’t realised that I wanted to leave at that point,” you began, feeling Seokjin’s gaze follow you.
That night when he’d disclosed he was retiring you had felt sad inside. You hadn’t been able to pinpoint why back then, but soon it had all made sense. You were jealous almost. Jealous he was brave enough to leave without worrying about consequences and the future. You wanted to be like him. You wanted to have his guts.
“I was trying to reignite a passion that had died a long time ago, but now that I’ve realised that, it just makes me want to do this even more.” You paused, placing a hand on his shoulder. You really wanted him to listen and understand. “I really want to make this movie with you. Working on this project has been amazing and I couldn’t think of anybody better to work on it with – or film it with,” you added with a laugh. He joined in.
You rubbed up and down his back fondly, unaware you were doing so. “Thank you for thinking of me, Seokjin. It really means a lot.”
“That’s okay,” he smiled, twinkle back in his eyes.
“It’s going to be the perfect last time.”
You were sure of it.
Tomorrow was the day. After weeks and weeks of careful planning and non-stop work, tomorrow was shooting day. A mixture of excitement and nerves had been swirling around in your stomach all day. It was almost as if you’d been pushing the inevitable to the back of your mind, not really thinking about it because you’d been so busy organising the whole thing. Now it was finally hitting you. Tomorrow would be your last ever porn movie. Your last ever day as an adult film actress – technically. You didn’t know how to feel. But you’d told yourself not to think of that until after the shoot. You needed to put your all into this, a distracted mind would only hinder the movie.
All the finer details were complete; the boring admin, STI screenings and results – You’d even spent the morning occupied with beauty trips; the hair salon, a much needed manicure and pedicure and lastly, the most dreaded, a full body hair wax. You were just glad it was over, and even more glad that was your last time getting your poor little body hairs ripped out from the neck down. Grabbing a quick lunch, you’d then busied yourself with straightening up your apartment as later on this evening you’d be welcoming a guest… Seokjin would be joining you for a celebration of sorts – to applaud your hard work over these past few weeks, but as well as that, tonight you’d be dropping a teaser through social media. It was the last step, set design completed just a few days ago, the director and camera men successfully familiarised with it and the script – everything was complete.
Admittedly the teaser had been a last minute addition, something put forward by Moon Studios’ marketing team. You’d let them create the image, not about to attempt to learn Photoshop in a day, but Seokjin and you had the final say, settling on the sexual imagery of a banana inserted through the hole of a pink iced doughnut. It was perfect. You’d both laughed hard at the sight. Accompanying the teaser image was the title of the movie: Glazed & Dazed: Good Girl Gone Bad XXX and a short cryptic narrative including a line from the film itself.
Maybe that was why your nerves were shot to pieces right now, anticipating the online reaction.
You were certain Seokjin was feeling the same too. No sooner had he arrived, you’d already made your way through a bottle of Merlot, the remnants in your glasses. You’d ordered takeout too, so don’t worry, you weren’t drinking on an empty stomach. You couldn’t risk the world’s worst hangover tomorrow.
There was still time before the teaser was released so in the meantime, you’d found a movie to watch on Netflix, something light-hearted that you could watch casually as you chatted. It was really nice to unwind, especially with Seokjin. It was refreshing to talk about things nonrelated to work, but of course the subject had to come up sooner or later, especially when it seemed Seokjin had something he wanted to tell you.
“So, I wanted to let you know,” he began, sounding unsure, a little nervous. He was sat next to you on the sofa and he leaned forward, placing his wine glass on the coffee table.
You eyed him slowly, now feeling a little nervous yourself. For what reason, you didn’t know. He took a deep breath and looked in your direction.
“This will be my last movie too.”
Your jaw dropped, visibly gobsmacked. “What?” You spluttered, mind whirring.
You thought he’d had a few more movies left. Never had he once brought it up in conversation, even when you were talking about your own plans to retire. Had he only recently decided? You had too many questions, brain haphazardly settling on just one, and even that you had to fight it out. “Shouldn’t we have said something, made an announcement? This is special, Seokjin.”
He chuckled, waving your suggestions away with his hand. “I don’t want that. It’s easier this way, and I don’t want to make a big deal about it.”
You scoffed. “Do you have any clue who you are? This will make it an even bigger deal.”
“You haven’t announced it’s your last movie either,” he reminded.
Oh. He had a point. You’d failed to realise your hypocrisy there. You hadn’t made your retirement known either, because yes, like Seokjin, you didn’t want to make a fuss. Something told you that would happen anyway, no matter how you went about it. It was probably why you’d tried not to think about it.
You smiled sheepishly, finishing the rest of your wine. “Why did you choose this to be your last?” The question was out before you could stop it, curiosity getting the better of you.
He shrugged his shoulders slightly. In the white sweatshirt he was wearing they looked twice the size – if possible. You’d be seeing them in all their naked glory tomorrow. The realisation made something inside of you flutter.
“It just feels right. I wasn’t sure at first, when I would stop, but this,” he hesitated as he thought of the correct words. “This means something to you, and it’s been really hard not to let that wear off on me.”
Your brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
He smiled softly. “This movie’s special to you. You should be proud. It’s the perfect way to end everything.”
“You helped create it too.” You couldn’t and wouldn’t take all the credit.
Seokjin shook his head and laughed. “I put a tiny dash of creative input in, you’re the brains.”
He was being modest again. There was no use fighting him on it, you’d learnt he was pretty damn stubborn. He’d actually put a lot of creative input into this idea, and even more helpful, he’d been your pillar of support throughout this whole project. Without him, Glazed & Dazed would not be happening tomorrow.
“Well, not that it means anything, but I’m really honoured that you chose this as your last movie,” you told him, glancing his way. You clutched the stem of your glass, palms a little sweaty as you continued. “That you chose me.”
He chuckled bashfully. “No, I need to be saying that to you.”
Your gaze caught and there was that flutter again. You had no idea what was up with you as of late. You kept blaming it on the end being nigh. Sentimental and all. Come tomorrow this project would be one step closer to being over. Of course you still had the editing process left but that would be in a room shared with numerous other people. It would no longer be just Seokjin and you, and that thought made you sad. Despite knowing you’d made a lifelong friendship and despite promising to hang out after this movie was complete, you knew deep down it wouldn’t be the same. You’d no longer see him nearly every day, you’d no longer have an excuse to call or facetime him. What if he decided to move away? No longer needing to live in the city once he gave up porn. You’d never see him then…
For god’s sake, you were being stupid. Why did this even matter? It was laughable. You were sure Seokjin wasn’t having these ridiculous thoughts right now.
He shifted, clearing his throat as he sat forward, reaching for his glass. He finished it with one last swig. You thought about offering to open up another bottle but stopped yourself. It was the wine that had probably gotten you into this mess. Although there was no wine involved when you’d been panic cleaning this afternoon like a maniac, nervous to have him in your apartment for some reason…
He was still leaning forward, elbows rested on the tops of his spread thighs, and you found yourself speaking again, needing to fill the silence that had spread between you. You’d been lost in your own head for too long and now felt awkward. “Tomorrow is the end for both of us.”
Seokjin glanced your way with a small smile. “Do you feel weird about it?”
“A little.” You admitted. “It hasn’t hit me yet.”
“Same,” he laughed softly.
“I’m excited though.”
“Excited for the future or for tomorrow?” He teased, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Seokjin,” you chided playfully.
“What?” He asked as innocently as he could muster, but couldn’t help but laugh, finally sitting back, glass once again placed on the coffee table. “Genuine question.”
A smile played along your mouth as you tilted your head to the side. “Genuine answer? For both. But I’m also hella nervous.”
You hadn’t filmed anything since about a week before your agency had reached out to Seokjin’s. You’d had no interest, too preoccupied with the project. You were aware Seokjin had filmed a few things in between, but nothing for about three weeks as things became busier with G&D. You were totally out of whack, never having this much of a break in between shoots since your career had started. No wonder your nerves were shot to pieces.
“Don’t be. I promise I’ll go easy on you.” Seokjin winked.
What? Had Seokjin just winked at you?! He was messing around obviously, but it still made you feel funny. You’d never filmed with someone you classed as a friend before. You’d turn up to set and only have about ten minutes to get familiar with the person you’d be having sex with. Any acquaintances with said person came after the shoot, and then if you ever had to sleep with them again, it was just normal. The bond was made after sex, not before, and that’s what was making you the most nervous. You were a professional so deep down you knew you’d be fine, but you still couldn’t help but worry. Especially when you’d be out of your depth with this movie, out of your comfort zone.
“You’re honestly going to be fine,” he reassured, probably reading the look on your face. His arm outstretched along the back of the couch, his hand gripping your left shoulder to give it an encouraging shake.
You grinned. He was right. How could you not be fine with Seokjin there? You were nervous for no reason, getting yourself worked up because you’d put your blood, sweat and tears into this movie.
“So do you have plans once this is all over?” You asked. You’d spoken about yours in passing but never his.
“Nothing at first. Just enjoy some normality until I work out a plan, I guess.” His arm was still around the back of the couch, although his hand had removed itself from your shoulder. You could hear him playing with the fabric behind your head.
He sighed loudly, a laugh huffing from his mouth. “Over a decade in porn, who’d have thought it? Not me.”
“Well, I’m positive the industry won’t be the same without you,” you told him in jest, although there was truth behind your words. Without thinking you dropped your hand down onto his leg, just above the knee, giving it a squeeze. You realised immediately and panicked, lifting it away hastily.
There was a beat of silence, possibly awkward, but if Seokjin had noticed he didn’t point it out. “I’m sure it’ll be fine,” he chuckled quietly, removing his arm from behind you to scratch his nose. “I’ve honestly been dreaming of this moment for years.” His voice was uncharacteristically small, as if he was hesitant to admit it.
“You have?” You were surprised. You’d thought it was just his time to leave now, not that he’d been eager to do so for a long time.
He hummed wistfully. “I told myself by 25 I’d be done. I’d have enough money saved up, I’d still be young and having sex on camera would just be something I’d have done for fun. By 30 I wanted to have met someone already, started a family.” He caught the shock on your face and mistook it, laughing. “Don’t look so surprised, I’m quite the romantic.”
“No, it’s not that,” you assured. “I just… I’m sorry things didn’t work out like that.”
The mood had turned a little sombre now. You felt sad for him, unaware he’d felt like that, but then again, how could you know? You’d only become acquainted a little over two months ago.
“Sometimes life doesn’t work out like we imagined. It’s fine. Like I said,” he smiled, “no regrets. Regrets aren’t worth it. I don’t regret a thing.” His gaze lingered on yours as he said that, as if he was going to say something else. Maybe he thought better of it because nothing followed.
“I’m sure you’ll meet someone soon.” The words fell from your mouth quickly, as if your brain was desperate to comfort him. They felt a little bitter on your tongue. You guessed it was the wine.
“Maybe,” he shrugged off. “I think it’s just the price I paid though. Not many can deal with this lifestyle. Just because I’m retiring doesn’t take that all away. Not that I hold it against them. I get it.”
You stayed quiet, unsure what to say. You didn’t think you could make him feel better, not when deep down that was your worst fear too. You’d totally abandoned dating and relationships a long time ago, a personal choice, but there was definitely a part of you that wondered who would want you if you tried. It was nice to know you weren’t alone there – selfish, but nice.
“I understand what you mean,” you offered finally. “Although, we should probably stop thinking like that.”
“You’re right,” he smiled warmly, shifting his body to face you as he lifted and folded his left leg onto the couch. His elbow leaned on the back cushions, running his fingers through his hair. “We deserve some happiness.” There they went again, those eyes of his twinkling. The smile warm enough to melt the coldest, most broken of hearts.
You tilted your head to the side, curious to know something. You hoped it wasn’t too invasive a question. “Why did you stay so long if you had a plan?”
“Nah, it was definitely a dream,” he laughed. “But, to answer your question. Fear. Fear of the unknown.” You knew that feeling far too well.
“But, hey, I’m finally facing it. It’s finally happening.” He paused, his next words leaving you breathless. “Thanks to you.”
Huh? You stayed silent, eyes almost comically wide. He continued. “This may sound cheesy as hell but I probably wouldn’t have had the courage to finally leave if you hadn’t spoken about wanting too as well. Just knowing you were going through the same kind of thing, I don’t know,” he chuckled awkwardly. “It helped me. That sounds selfish, I hope you don’t take it the wrong way.”
“But you said you were retiring,” you managed to get out, totally confused. What did he mean? He was the one who’d helped you finally realise this was the end, not the other way around.
He laughed loudly, sounding embarrassed. “You didn’t know me back then. Everyone who does knows I’ve been saying that every year for like the past seven.”
You were still bewildered. He saw that and looked a little concerned, smile stilling. “It doesn’t mean I didn’t mean it each time, of course I did, but this time you helped make it real. Thank you.”
At this point he probably thought you were frozen. Or broken. You were still staring at him, speechless. You’d helped him? You’d helped someone face up to their fears? The same person who had helped you stand up to yours? You jumped a little when you felt him take hold of your hand, bringing it to his knee. It was warm and soft. Just like him all over.
“So that’s why it’s this movie,” he murmured softly, playing with your fingers delicately. “Because it’s you. I met you and I think you’re really wonderful and I’m beyond grateful that you helped me, even if you didn’t realise.”
You could hear your heart thudding loudly, inside your ears felt a little fuzzy, like you were underwater and your cheeks felt hot from all the sudden attention. You were very aware of his hand, fingers now laced with yours. You had to say something. You’d been silent for far too long. “I’m… I’m kind of lost for words.”
He chuckled. “So I’m guessing it would be a bad time for another question?”
You smiled, bouncing his hand against his thigh. “Try me.”
He spoke quietly and articulately, as if he was careful not to overstep boundaries. “Why me? Why did you want it to be me?”
You’d already told him he was the only choice that first night you’d met, but that was all you’d indulged, too embarrassed to explain further maybe. Now, knowing him like you did, it was easy. You should have told him sooner.
“I’d heard things about you, how you were really respectful and just nice.” Lame word, but true. “If I was going to do this, I wanted to feel safe and I trusted you. I didn’t know you, but I trusted you, and I was right to feel that way.” You grinned. “There was no one else I could think of. I’d rather not do it at all.”
It was Seokjin’s turn to look taken back now, letting out a low whistle as he pulled back slightly, unsure how to take all the compliments. His fingers slid from yours and it made you a little sad. Stupid, you knew, he had only done it to catch your attention, to thank you, nothing else. In an attempt to distract yourself you slipped in something else.
“Plus, you look like you know how to use that giant dick of yours.”
He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Flattery will get you nowhere.”
“As if I’m not already having sex with you tomorrow.” You shot back. “I don’t need to flatter you.”
He wiggled his eyebrows. “But are you sure I can use that giant dick of mine? How do you know? It could all just be acting.”
“Word of mouth,” you shrugged with a smirk.
“I guess you’ll find out tomorrow.”
“I guess I will.” You laughed, instantly feeling a little lighter, a little less daunted over tomorrow now that you were joking around. If Seokjin could make you feel this relaxed right now you knew tomorrow would be fine. More than fine, it would be great.
Shortly after that you found yourself in the mood for something sweet, leaving Seokjin in your living room to go hunting inside your kitchen. You found a dark chocolate mousse in the refrigerator, bought with Irene in mind for the weekend, but what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her. When you walked back, a serving glass in each hand and two spoons being held between your lips, you found that you cat, Ozzy, who had been sleeping in your bedroom this entire time, comfortably curled up on Seokjin’s lap as he stroked him, purring loudly.
You chuckled as you set the glasses and spoons on the coffee table. “He likes you.”
Seokjin grinned. “And I like him. What’s his name?”
“Ozzy. Short for Oswald.”
“Amazing.” He laughed. “Suits him.”
You sat back down, silently cooing over the way Seokjin tickled under Ozzy’s fluffy chin. That cat was like your child. Plus, you trusted his intuition. If Ozzy liked someone it meant they were a good person. Not that you needed the confirmation. “Are you more of a dog or a cat person?”
Seokjin looked your way, still giving Ozzy the stroking of his life. His purrs were beginning to get deafening. “Honestly? Before tonight it was dog. Right now? Cat all the way.” He looked back at Ozzy who meowed happily as Seokjin went for the chin again. “You’re just so cute. And handsome!”
You laughed at the transformation Seokjin’s voice had gone under, almost as if he was talking to a baby. You knew that feeling all too well. Ozzy got babied 24/7 by you. You were most definitely a cat person, had been since you were a kid.
Seokjin insisted on eating his dessert with Ozzy still on his lap, the feline refusing to move now that he’d found a new friend. You continued watching the movie even though you’d missed three-quarters of it while talking earlier. It wasn’t long to wait now, before the teaser dropped, just under half an hour, and the nerves were back, beginning to get the best of you. That’s why you were glad when Seokjin started up conversation again, something to distract you.
“What are you going to do after filming is done?”
“I really have no clue,” you began. “I think I’ll just take some time out like you, remember what it’s like to be normal and then concentrate on this agency thing, I guess. But no rush. I need to do this properly.”
You still had the editing process left, which you were glad for. While you were more than ready to leave the industry, leaving your family at Angel Entertainment was another story. You’d let them know your decision maybe three weeks ago and just thinking about it again made you tear up. There had been a lot of tears. Even Irene had blubbed like a baby and she’d known just after Seokjin. They understood and respected your decision but that didn’t mean it wasn’t hard to accept – even if deep down some of the bosses had already had an inkling.
Your agency idea was still just that. You were passionate about it, don’t get you wrong, but you couldn’t rush it. If you were serious about it, which you were, time needed to be taken. In the meantime, just enjoying some peace and quiet was more important. Maybe you’d visit your parents back home, go on vacation with your friends, hopefully hang out with Seokjin…
“Yes, some normality is the most important thing right now,” he agreed.
You smiled, looking down at Ozzy. “Do you think we can ever be that?” You reached to stroke him, not daring to look at Seokjin. “Normal?” You thought it would take a long time to adjust after porn.
“Of course we can,” he assured. He stroked Ozzy too, your fingers brushing over one another. “We’re normal now. It’s just our jobs are a little… different.”
You hummed passively in response, still unable to look Seokjin in the eye.
“Hey,” he nudged, trying to get your attention. “Hey. Look at me,” he requested gently, a hand reaching out for your face. You let him cup your cheek and lift your head up because it felt nice. It felt good when he touched you. “We’re normal. Just like everybody else in this crazy, crazy world.”
You smiled and rubbed his thigh, appreciating his reassurance. “You’re right,” you agreed softly. Your anxiety was getting the better of you. Everything would be okay. You had Seokjin after all, who was going through the same things as you. You could help one another, were helping one another.
“You’re right,” you repeated, more enthusiastic this time. You let the side of your face rest on the back of the couch, Seokjin’s hand drifting from your face as he copied you, gazing at you with that gentle smile of his. “I’m really happy I met you.”
The words were out before you could even comprehend you were thinking them. You spoke from the heart, meant every word.
“Likewise.” He replied, smiling harder. “It feels like I’ve known you forever.”
You agreed silently, Ozzy purring like a maniac in the background. It was oddly soothing despite it being quite amusing. There was no need to worry about your friendship with Seokjin. It wasn’t going to end immediately after this movie was complete. This was just the beginning.
Your gaze flitted to the clock on your wall. “Hey. The teaser drops in ten minutes.”
“Nervous?” He asked, lifting an eyebrow.
You grinned. “Not so much anymore.”
The reaction from the teaser last night had been phenomenal. Seokjin had laughed at your surprise, finding it amusing that you undermine yourself so much. Don’t you realise how amazing you are? had been his exact words. But you couldn’t take all the credit. People were excited for him too. Of course they were.
Anyway, that concern over, the second quickly became irrelevant too. There had never been anything to worry about when it came to today. Turns out arriving onto set was all that was needed to instantly remember what it felt like to shoot. You were a professional after all, hundreds of movies under your belt and today would be your last act. You were fucking Seokjin Kim in a couple of hours, one of the country’s – if not world’s, most famous adult actors and you were going to enjoy every goddamn second of it. Sue you.
You spent most of the morning getting prepped; shower, hair, make up, outfit – or more so, lack of outfit. Your shirt was skin-tight, skirt so short the curves of your ass said hi, and your stilettos were the true definition of “pornstar heels.” You were just lucky you weren’t walking in them much.
Seokjin’s outfit was spot on. You’d seen it hung up already, but on him was another story. You were unsure how someone could look that hot dressed as a baker, but of course it was him that could pull it off. A double breasted crisp white shirt complete with a black neckerchief, black fitted slacks and to complete the look, a black and white vertical striped apron tied around that sinful waist of his. Seokjin’s body was made for something like this. He looked amazing. His hair parted to the side, that trademark deadly forehead on show.
The set looked wonderful too. You’d spent a long time choosing a colour scheme, settling on garish reds and pinks for the kitchen you’d inevitably end up fucking in. There were two clear display cabinets with the wackiest doughnut designs you could find, and lastly a gold wall hanging titling the name of the bakery: Glazed & Dazed. It was perfect. You loved it when a plan came together.
Irene dropped by momentarily to wish you luck. She wasn’t staying for this one, she had a tonne of work to catch up on, but you were honestly kind of glad she wasn’t watching this time around. You’d told her just that and she’d agreed with a laugh. You decided to meet for dinner later on tonight. It didn’t matter too much if she wasn’t there anyway, she was usually your moral support, but Seokjin would take that place today. You were both in the same boat after all. Besides, you still had a lot of familiar faces around you today in the form of staff.
Filming began at 11am sharp. There were a lot of scenes, some you were new to so you were unsure how many times you might have to shoot. You were expecting to be here for 6 hours or so, maybe more. You managed to meet up in private with Seokjin ten minutes beforehand, too busy all morning with getting ready, and you hurriedly checked up on one another, wishing each other luck with a quick hug – the first of its kind. You almost felt giddy by the end of the conversation, excitement bubbling. After all these weeks of planning, it was time for the anticipated result.
The first scene was always the cringiest. Zero plot pacing, just a few lines quickly turned sexual and BAM! The sex started. Seokjin was a pro though, so while you hated cliché things like this he made it so natural. It was easy to adjust, easy to lose yourself in the story. Even with the director and two camera men in the room with you. Studio lights glaring, the cameras rolling, all the attention on the both of you…
“I’ve done my research and I already know about your motto,” you told Seokjin who was directly opposite you, propped casually against the kitchen counter. You were sat on a stool underneath the gold signage, legs crossed, a heel dangling from one of your feet seductively, skirt riding up your thighs, a peek of your red panties visible if you knew where to look. (The camera did.)
Seokjin cocked an eyebrow, smug smirk growing. He tapped his pen against the clipboard he was holding. “You do?”
“Mmhm.” You nodded, acting innocently as best as possible.
“Let me here you say it then.” He prompted. “I need to hear you say it if you want this job.”
You smiled, dramatic silence ensuing. You spoke slowly and clearly, enunciating each word perfectly. “The magic is always in the hole.”
Seokjin lifted from his spot, a camera zoomed in as he chuckled. “There’s a funny story behind that. Do you want me to tell you?”
The camera on you focused as you stared directly into Seokjin’s eyes. “I think it would be better if you showed me.”
“I guess it would be rude of me not to.” He glanced down at the clipboard. “One last question.” Looking up at you, his face was poker straight. “Are you a virgin?”
You feigned shock, eyes wide. “Why would you want to know that?”
“Just answer the question.”
“No, I’m not a virgin.” You hesitated. “Is that going to be a problem?” After years of being pinned an innocent virgin, it was time for a change. It felt invigorating just saying the words out loud.
Seokjin smirked. “Not the answer I was looking for, but I can work with it.” His camera followed as he strode towards you. You looked up at him expectantly, eyes half-lidded, pink lips parted.
Seokjin’s voice was dangerously low when he spoke next, sending a bolt of pleasure between your legs. “If you really want this job then you’re going to have to fuck me.”
“Cut! Great job, guys.” Brian, the director praised, signalling the end of the scene. “This is going to be fucking gold!”
Half an hour later Seokjin had you pressed into him against the kitchen island, his long legs wide open to accommodate your ass pushed snugly into his growing erection. Your shirt was popped open a few buttons, your hard nipples popping out of your red push up bra as Seokjin used one hand to play with them in turns, fingers pinching them to peaked perfection. His other hand was preoccupied with rubbing over your panties, skirt bunched up, legs forced open, both heels dangling from your feet, camera one having the best view in the room.
“That’s it, relax,” Seokjin hummed into your ear, swirling his tongue inside before biting down on the lobe. You gasped. Seokjin circled his fingers harder around your clit, spreading the arousal that had already formed. He was harsh, trying to make the wet noises as loud as possible. As well as visually pleasing, porn had to be aurally too. You had no problem in that department, able to get wet at the snap of two fingers. Talented, that you were.
You squirmed in his lap, moaning softly, keeping your eyes directly on camera two, a few feet away. “You like that, mm? Your pussy’s getting wet, yes?” Seokjin asked, eliciting an overzealous nod from you. You knew what was coming next, crying out as he slapped down on your clothed pussy. “Be more vocal. Let me know you like it.” He demanded.
You moaned loudly, pressing into his body. “I do. I do like it! My pussy’s getting so wet.”
He chuckled, pleased by your response. You breathed shallowly as he ran a single finger up your slit, teasing you with his featherlight touch, knowing you had to stay obediently still. “You horny little slut.” He hissed.
You felt yourself clench. This type of degradation was new to you, it excited you almost. In real life you’d drop kick a man if he ever spoke to you in such a manner, but right now, for the cameras, for the movie, for Seokjin, you could get on board with it. You had to give your everything after all.
Cupping your heat, Seokjin growled. “Twitching against my hand. Are you really that desperate to work here or is it just because you haven’t been fucked in a while?”
You wriggled against his hold, trying to act as desperate as you could.
“You want to cum that eagerly?” He scoffed. “Yeah?” Except for the guttural moan that left you, you stayed silent. You didn’t start getting bold until after your first orgasm.
Chuckling against your ear, he whispered tauntingly. “I don’t think I should make it that easy.” He took your pussy between his thumb and forefinger, pushing the lips together. Your underwear, visibly soaked, stuck to the swollen flesh, camera catching every minute detail.
“Look at that.” Seokjin patronised. “Desperate cunt. Desperate clit.” He pinched it on cue and you tried to squeeze your legs shut. He didn’t let you, shoving them apart.
“Keep your legs open!” He ordered, spanking the inside of both your thighs one after the other.
Grabbing your hand, he forcibly pressed it into his erection, bending your arm behind your back effectively. Unable to go anywhere or move anywhere, you were squashed against his muscular body. Seeing Seokjin dressed so casually these past few weeks you’d almost forgotten what he was hiding under his baggy sweatshirts.
“Look what you’ve done, filthy slut,” he hissed. “Made my cock hard. So fucking hard.”
You squeezed the flesh, gripping it tighter when he began rubbing you faster. “Can you feel how big it is? How thick it is? You don’t know what you’ve gotten yourself into…”
You whimpered, eyes trained on camera two as Seokjin pleasured you. It was only a few moments later when he reached for the wooden rolling pin strategically placed next to him.
“What are you going to do with that?” You asked, all wide-eyed and innocent.
He took the utensil with the hand he’d been touching you with, slowly dragging it down your torso until he hit your underwear. You purposely held your breath, waiting for him to start rubbing the end of the wood against your clit. When he did so, you moaned sweetly, your grip on his cock still there and tightening.
“You’re dirty,” he chuckled deeply, pleased with your reaction. “If you want this job so bad, then show me,” he ordered. “Cum for me. Show me what a good girl you can be.”
He circled the rolling pin harder, free hand reaching for your hair, moving it out of the way so he could attach his mouth to your neck. More pleasure rocked through your body at the sensation, his tongue gliding across the skin before he pulled back to blow. It sent shivers up your spine, and you concentrated hard. You needed to cum soon.
You wriggled your body against him, looking down at the wooden instrument between your legs, rubbing against your clit. “Yes, come on…” Seokjin urged, able to read your reactions. He was on your ear again, kissing and sucking and nibbling, anything that would help get you close. “Cum for me and I’ll let you suck my cock. You wanna suck my cock?”
You moaned pretty loudly, dropping your whole weight into his body now as you barely held it together. “Choke on it… Fucking worship it.”
He was talking through gritted teeth, an action that just ruined you even more. You could hear yourself chanting yes to the ceiling, following the script, but it didn’t really feel like you were doing it, too lost in the pleasure. Your vagina muscles squeezed rapidly, desperate for something. Desperate for Seokjin.
At that thought, you came, crying out as your body shuddered. Seokjin stopped immediately, holding the rolling pin still and you rubbed your pussy against it a few times – slowly and theatrically, giving the camera a good show before he dropped it to the floor. It bounced and thudded.
Seokjin hummed in approval, kissing your temple. “Good girl.” He murmured. You ran your hand along his cock, a proud grin on your face as he continued to praise you. “Good little slut.”
Just like that you were back to reality, various staff rushing onto set to get you and the lighting ready for the next scene. You peeled yourself from Seokjin, not realising how sweaty you’d both gotten, and popped your boobs back into your bra. You could feel his erection against your side and you quickly stood up, skirt (barely) covering your modesty. Immediately there was a lipstick tube in your line of sight, Ashley the makeup artist, eager to retouch your blotted lips.
“Amazing. We’ll get to the next scene in five,” Brian informed, making his way to Seokjin and you. He smiled in your direction. “Well done, you didn’t even have to fake that.”
You heard Seokjin laugh behind your shoulder. “Come on. It’s me. There would never be any reason to fake it.”
“Hey.” You exclaimed, blindly pushing your arm back to try and hit him. “More like I’m a professional.” Turning your head to glance at him once Ashley was finished, you added, “Don’t flatter yourself, Kim.”
He just winked playfully, the action sending some kind of ripple through your body. “Wouldn’t dream of it. You were wonderful just then.”
You smiled in thanks, finding yourself admiring him as he still sat on the island, now getting his hair fixed.
“Ready?” Brian asked a few minutes later once you were back in positions, cameras ready to roll once again; one in front, one in the back. You were back firmly pressed into Seokjin’s chest, nipples out again, skirt bunched up, panties freshly dampened by the help of a spray bottle. His erection was still there, just as hard as before, if not harder.
“We’re going all the way up to the fingering scene. Then we’ll stop to get some close ups.” Brian continued. “You guys remember positions?”
“Yep.” You confirmed, Seokjin close behind.
“Great. Okay! In 3, 2, 1, ACTION!”
Seokjin grabbed your hips immediately. “Stand up,” he ordered, pushing you forward. You obeyed, reaching to push your skirt down. “No, keep your skirt up. Let me have a look at you.” He hummed in approval at the sight of your ass barely covered by the thong you wore, before clicking his tongue. “It’s like you came here expecting to get fucked.”
You looked at him over your shoulder, a smirk forming. “Maybe I did.”
Seokjin’s eyes bored into you, menacingly. You wobbled a little on your feet, however unnoticeable. “Bend over on the counter. Ass in the air.”
You jumped into action, hands slapping down onto the countertop opposite, back sloped, ass up high like he wanted. You waited patiently, making it obvious you were attempting to control your breathing. You heard Seokjin stand up, striding towards you. You couldn’t see him, but you knew he was undoing his neckerchief, throwing it to the floor as he stopped right behind you.
You startled when he ran a hand down your spine, stopping just above your ass as he bunched up your skirt even more and bent over you, whispering against your ear. “You take direction well.”
You had no time to reply. With a yelp you stumbled as he straightened up and kicked your left heel from your foot, able to catch yourself when he closely followed with the second. He snapped the thin fabric of your thong with his fingers before harshly grabbing the meat of your ass, growling in approval.
“Fuck. Such a pretty little ass.” All you did was moan, pushing back into his warm grip until you felt a searing pain, his palm pulling back to land a smack to the flesh. You cried out in surprise, eyes wide, catching the camera in front of you. Seokjin repeated and you cried out even louder.
“Shut up,” he told you as you continued to whimper, hiding your face against the bench. You listened instantly, much to Seokjin’s pleasure. “Good girl,” he praised, speaking sweetly now. “If you want to get hired you have to show me you’re obedient. No screaming no matter how hard I spank you, okay?”
You nodded, unintelligible noises leaving you as you tried to answer yes. You had never been spanked like this before, so excessively and harshly. You thought of all those comments you’d seen over the years as Seokjin’s palm rained down on your now red and sore flesh. She needs a good spanking. I’d love to spank her silly. I’d spank that girl until she cried. What a shame they’d never be able to. Maybe this would suffice… or maybe it would drive them crazy with jealousy…
“You’ve turned such a pretty colour,” Seokjin awed after he’d had enough, now caressing your skin softly, soothing the burn.
You moaned sweetly, ass tingling. The pain hadn’t been that bad, he’d gone easy on you but you still burned all over. It was a good feeling though. You had gotten wetter, able to feel your arousal pooling at your entrance. Pushing your ass back into his hands, you whined. “I can take initiative. Did I mention that?”
Seokjin paused curiously, your line marking the turning point of your character. “Take initiative how?”
You looked over your shoulder. “Let me suck your cock, boss.”
He cackled loudly, spinning you around in one fluid motion, clutching your waist as he pinned you against the counter. “Boss? Cute.”
You stared up at his mouth, hungry, craving a taste, knowing just how to build the sexual tension. He teased you, leaning in, as if he was about to kiss you before he sneered. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. Although… If I were your boss, you’d be sucking my cock every day.”
You could feel your heart racing inside your chest, watching every movement his lips made as he spoke. “You’d love that, wouldn’t you? Love to suck my cock all day.”
“Gladly,” you whispered, unblinking.
The corner of his mouth curved up and he gripped you tighter, lifting you up to perch your ass on the bench. Forcing your legs open he hooked a finger under your panties, dragging it down your slit. You jerked at the contact. Seokjin caught it, his eyes catching yours momentarily before he was back in character.
“Look at you,” he belittled. “Fucking drooling you want to choke on my dick so bad.”
It was still so funny hearing Seokjin swear after getting to know him so well over the past couple of months, but you kept it together, mainly because you were currently falling apart over something else.
“Well, tough. It’s not about what you want. It’s about what I want.” He informed you. “And I want to eat that swollen cunt of yours.” He stepped back at that, a demand rolling off his tongue. “Take off your clothes.”
You slid off the counter, standing before him, nipples still poking out of your bra, skirt bunched up. You began unbuttoning your shirt, hurrying when Seokjin began to get impatient. Next came your skirt, pooling at your feet before you stepped out of it.
“All of it except for that slutty thong.”
You unclasped your bra, dropping that to the floor and Seokjin drank you in, smugly enjoying what he saw. He jerked his head to the bench. “Get up there and spread for me.”
You followed his direction, climbing on top of the counter and propping yourself up on your elbows. You spread your legs, bending them at the knee to firmly hook your feet around the edges of the granite. Seokjin just stood looking down at you, making no attempt to touch.
“Is this how all your job interviews go?” You asked curiously.
Chuckling, he squatted, coming face to face with your pussy. Your underwear was so soaked through they moulded to you, easily able to make out your folds. “That’s only for me to know.”
He slowly peeled the red fabric back, clear strings of your arousal stretching out and then snapping apart. “Beautiful.” He awed, rubbing the pad of his forefinger around your clit. His breath fanned across you, making you squirm. Your hole clenched. “Such a beautiful, eager pussy you have.”
“Please,” you begged. “P-please taste it.”
He was greatly amused now, your sheer shamelessness hilarious. “Can’t wait for me to devour you. Eat that pretty little cunt of yours.”
You whimpered, agreeing with him. You couldn’t. He ran his finger up and down your slit delicately, spreading your wetness.
Angel. Seokjin had chosen that, suggesting an homage to the agency you’d spent many a year at. It felt good to hear it coming from his mouth.
“Let’s take these off you, mm?” He tugged at your thong. He kept murmuring, making the anticipation even more unbearable. You could feel his voice deep inside you, eager to feel his fingers instead. “You’ve fucking ruined them. What a shame. If you worked for me there’d be no need for underwear in the first place.”
Now fully nude, Seokjin still clothed, you bet this would look great on camera. Men and women alike loved that kind of thing, you included. It suddenly dawned on you how excited you were to watch this back. You wondered how you looked right now, fucked out, waiting for Seokjin to finally have his way. How you’d thought all this edging was a good idea was beyond you. You could feel an ache beginning to form, Seokjin’s featherlight ministrations beyond frustrating.
“I have an appetite for sweet, tight pussy,” he stated, so close to your opening you could practically feel each curl of his tongue as he spoke. “Is your pussy tight?”
“Yes,” you moaned.
You squirmed at the sensation of his finger finally at your hole, circling your hips to rub against it, eager for any kind of friction. “Hm. Let’s find out shall we.” The way your muscles squeezed around him as he pushed halfway inside was almost embarrassing, the teasing getting the better of you. At this rate you’d be unable to hold off an orgasm.
No sooner had his finger entered you, it was gone. As if you hadn’t known that would happen anyway, but it was still irritating. Seokjin tutted, a grin appearing as he raised and stood between your legs.
“Exactly as I thought. You need to be trained for my cock.”
That signalled the brief pause in the scene, and you told yourself to relax a little, knowing what was coming next.
“Okay, cut for a moment, guys.” Brain spoke, clapping his hands and appearing next to you. “Eric, close up from this angle.” He directed. The camera man moved, squatting next to Seokjin. Brian turned to you. “Jack will film the rest. Make sure to really amp up your expressions, okay? You can do it, you’re amazing.”
“Of course I can.” You grinned proudly, despite your chest heaving up and down, your desperateness pretty obvious. It didn’t help that Seokjin’s thumbs were running tiny circles into your hips as he waited. You didn’t know when he’d started touching you, but it was only making you more impatient.
Brian chuckled. “I’ll stop you when we’ve got enough footage.” He tapped Seokjin’s shoulder and walked away. “Okaayy, action!”
Immediately, Seokjin dragged your ass along the counter, spreading your legs wider. He ghosted a hand over your pussy, before dragging two fingers down your slit. You gasped when he plunged them inside, knuckles up.
What followed was near to ten minutes of immoderate fingering, Seokjin’s filthy mouth running wild as he effectively stretched you open for the role.
“Such a needy little slut already,” Seokjin scoffed, hand now palm up, fingers poker straight as he fucked you with them. You were so wet you squelched around him, sucking greedily with the urge to cum. It was torture. You weren’t meant to cum here, pretend like you were going to, yes, but you weren’t supposed to be edged for real. You guess the shooting break had put you out practice after all.
You were shuddering by the time he pulled out of you, your arousal gleaming against his fingers, caught between them in thick strings. He rubbed it all over you, palming your clit in the process. You whimpered, tensing up as you tried your hardest not to give in.
He chuckled, slipping just one finger back inside of you, teasing you slowly. “It’s going to be easy making this pussy cum. I’m going to have fun with you.”
“Please,” you begged softly, unable to help it, sitting up slightly and looking into his eyes. “Please let me cum now.”
Seokjin hesitated, knowing that definitely wasn’t part of the script. He felt your muscles contract and his eyes trailed down between your legs. You noticed his gaze harden and then ever so slowly he curled his finger, grazing your g-spot. Your voice broke as you moaned, throwing your head back and you felt him about to add a second finger before your hopes were crushed – cruelly.
You wanted to yell out in frustration, your orgasm stolen from you, but Brian was hovering behind Seokjin again. You felt him pull back, sliding his finger from you. Your vagina clenched at the emptiness.
“That was more than enough. Perfect. Great job.”
Seokjin smiled your way, your heart skipped a beat. You panicked, instantly joking around “Why did you stop there?” You whined at Brian. “I nearly got him to make me cum.”
“Patience, babe,” Brian laughed. “You’ll cum soon.”
Seokjin laughed too before realising something. “Are you cold?”
“No, I’m fine,” you reassured him. “Let’s just carry on.”
Maybe you sounded impatient because it made him laugh harder.
It wasn’t long before the camera positions got readjusted and you were back in place, knowing that this time you’d definitely get to cum. You just had to hold off until it was time to do so.
“So eager to please the boss,” Seokjin smirked, two fingers deep inside of you.
You quivered. “I’ll cum so many times for you. Pleasee.”
“Just not yet. I have to see how sweet you taste first.”
You were truly shaking by the time he squatted again, face to face with your desperate pussy. Pulling out, he spread your lips apart, giving him a perfect view of your swollen clit. He hummed, liking what he saw and opened his mouth, extending his tongue out and curling it against the bundle of now near hysteric nerves.
He let out a low groan, right from the back of his throat. “Delicious. So fucking sweet.” He approved. “If I hire you how do you expect me to concentrate when you taste so fucking good.”
He went in for another go, flicking his tongue back and forth against your clit rapidly. You cupped one of your breasts, your foot slipped from the counter, unscripted, and Seokjin grabbed your calf, resting it over his shoulder. “You’re trembling,” he commented, stroking your leg. The way his breath fanned over you just made it even worse.
“I made your clit all hard,” he whispered, thumbing it slightly before capturing it with his tongue and sucking. You moaned loudly, rolling your hips into his face. “Fuck. You want my face all up in there? Dirty slut. Love me eating your pussy, yeah?”
“Y-yeah,” you strangled out. “Yeah, I love it so much. Please don’t stop!”
He pulled one of your outer lips into his mouth, sucking on the puffy flesh. Then he moved to the inner, sending you crazy you were so sensitive. You were uncontrollable when he stuck his tongue inside you, beginning to fuck you with it.
He gripped the sides of your ass, holding you up so he had easy access, holding his tongue straight as he thrust in and out. Your hands flew to his hair, pulling at the roots as you moved with him. “Ohhhh,” you cried out. “Shiiiit. Yes, yes, yes!” You were chanting, begging, pleasure rocketing through your body, heart racing. “Ple-easee—uhhh!”
Seokjin pulled back, flattening his tongue, the tip the only thing inside of you now as he shook his head back and forth, catching your clit in the process.
“You’re going to make me cum. Please make me cum!” You cried.
Seokjin stopped with a moan of his own, immediately shoving two fingers inside your hole. He fucked you harshly, grunting as he did so. “You like that, hm?” You nodded, glad that was your prompt because you were at a loss for words. “Your cunts a death trap. Feels so fucking amazing. Can’t wait to get my cock inside you.” He gritted out, slamming down on his knees.
You had to spread your legs, accommodating his broad shoulders. Your hands falling limp to your side, taking the harsh pleasure he gave you with happy defeat. When you felt his tongue against your clit again, you tensed up, remembering to look at the camera to your side. This scene was important, you knew that, yet your mind was coming up blank, unable to remember your lines. It was something about his cock. Did you have to beg him to fuck you? Beg him to let you suck him? You had no clue. All you could think about was the earthshattering pleasure you were experiencing right now, inching closer and closer to your end.
“Please, please,” you heard yourself whimpering quietly, knowing that wasn’t what you were supposed to be saying, but Seokjin was making you feel so good, fingers slamming against your walls, his tongue concentrating on your needy clit.
You kept your eyes trained on the camera, jaw slack, eyes wide and pleading, breathing shallow, concentrating on the sounds you made as Seokjin fucked you, the sounds as he made your pussy even wetter, until your body was growing stiff, a warmth travelling through it. You came with a sweet moan, not a fraction of how loud you should have been, but the orgasm was one of the best you’d had in a while, the waves of pleasure spasming through your body, your abdomen muscles clenching rapidly.
You felt Seokjin remove his mouth, fingers still inside of you, not moving half as much, but still prolonging your indulgence.
Brian’s voice cut through the haze and immediately your lines came back to you. Fuck. How had you blanked so bad?!
“What happened? Did you forget your lines?” He wondered, rushing over to you.
You sat up, Seokjin moving back to give you space. “I-I… I’m sorry, my mind sort of went blank.” You looked up at Seokjin, worried. “Should we film that again?” You didn’t want to ruin the movie in any way.
“No, no,” Seokjin reassured, stepping closer again to wrap his arm around your shoulders. “That was great. You were great.”
You smiled at him gratefully, resting your head against his arm. Feeling his shirt, you remembered you were butt naked and he was still fully clothed.
“Can we get a blanket?” Seokjin asked towards the staff, as if he could read your mind. A few seconds later you were draped with warmth, Seokjin removed his arm. “I think a lot of guys will prefer that anyway,” he carried on. “The dazed, trembling thing, I mean, I know I did…”
You grew surprised. Had Seokjin been watching you? You had been so overwhelmed you hadn’t been paying attention to anything. That might be embarrassing to watch back… You told yourself to stop worrying and grinned. “Okay, if you’re happy then so am I. Phew.” You sighed, still out of breath, “I need a moment. You really know how to give a girl an orgasm, you know that?”
He laughed. “Well, it is my job.”
“I think we‘ll take a break for lunch,” Brian informed, reminding you both he was there. “Remember to eat something,” he added your way. “You’re going to need the energy for sucking on that dick of his.”
Prompted, you found yourself glancing at Seokjin’s crotch, his erection now more visible than ever, even under his apron. He had the patience of a saint.
You spent lunch together discussing how filming had gone so far and what would be happening next. Seokjin was eager for you not to push yourself and made it clear that if you felt uncomfortable or panicked, you needed to tell him immediately. You knew that already and appreciated his concern, but you knew what to expect. Yes, the beginning had been quite tame in comparison but you were ready. You couldn’t wait to get back out there on set and make Seokjin feel good. It was only fair.
Nearly an hour later you got your wish.
Naked once again, spread out on the bench, Seokjin grabbed your hands and yanked you upright. “Come on, wake up,” he ordered, shaking you as you tried your best to act as dazed as you’d originally been. “Don’t quit on me now. You think you can cum for me and that’ll be enough? I want to see how far you can really go.”
“I-I can go as far as you want me to go!” You exclaimed, clutching onto his wrists, desperate for him to believe you.
“We’ll see about that,” he smirked. “Now,” he stepped back, beginning to untie the apron around his waist. “You’re going to suck my dick and you’re going to suck it good.”
He hadn’t needed long at all to get himself hard again after the lunch break and you watched as he scrunched up the striped fabric, throwing it beside you. Next he unzipped himself, able to push the front of his slacks down low enough to remove his aching length.
He held the shaft in his fist, taking one long stride towards you and tilted his head to the side. “Are you nervous, angel?”
You visibly gulped, knowing the camera would catch it.
“Never seen a cock this big?”
It was one of the biggest, definitely one of Seokjin’s “charming” points when it came to the industry. It wasn’t the first big dick you’d sucked or fucked, but this time would certainly be different. It was beautiful in real life, a handsome dick for a handsome person – obviously. Perfectly distended, veiny, the head a deep red. You nearly found yourself salivating.
“C’mon, open up,” he prompted, rolling his eyes once you did so. “Don’t tell me I have to train your mouth too. Can’t fit my cock anywhere.”
You went to swallow but he grabbed hold of your chin “Keep it open.” His eyes bored into yours before he pushed two fingers inside. “Suck them like you would my dick.”
You obeyed instantly, sucking as if your life depended on it despite how fast and far he thrust them inside your mouth. “Endure it,” he hissed. “It will be much worse when my cock’s stuffed down your throat.”
And that you did. You dribbled, choked and gagged, but kept up. The character you were playing was desperate after all. Desperate for him.
“Do you understand what you’re doing now?” Seokjin questioned, fingers stilling suddenly before he pressed down against your tongue. You nodded your head rapidly. That didn’t do for him.
“Y-wes,” you struggled, voice muffled as you tried to speak around his fingers, despite your tongue unable to move.
Satisfied he removed his digits. “Good girl,” he praised, rubbing your lips clean and then it was time for the kiss. Your first kiss.
Kissing didn’t have to happen in a movie like this, in fact, it was a last-minute addition to the script that night you were in the office, reassuring him about your intentions, when you’d told him how much you really wanted to film this with him.
Lost in thought for a second, you were actually startled when Seokjin lunged, gripping your face as he moaned greedily, his tongue pushing into your mouth. It was one big blur as you let Seokjin take over, consume you almost, unable to do anything other than cling to his forearms, anchoring yourself to him in case you fell back with the force of his mouth.
“One last thing,” he rasped, ripping away to tilt your head back. You couldn’t see yourself, but you knew your lipstick was smeared everywhere. His face came into sight as he spat, a line of spit falling directly into your mouth. “Swallow it, slut.”
And then it was time to suck his dick.
You started off slowly, taking his cock deeper and deeper into your mouth until Seokjin was sure you could handle it. That’s how you built anticipation in porn, riled the audience up so bad they wanted to yell at their screens – or cum in their pants. But it wasn’t long before Seokjin was halfway out of his clothes, naked from the waist down and demanding you to stand up. His shirt was loose halfway down, pushed up against his stomach. He looked criminal.
“On your knees.” He pushed you down by the shoulders and you clutched at the top of his thighs. He snatched them away, pushing them behind you. “Keep your hands behind your back.” He hissed.
You listened, lacing your fingers together, your jaw angled upright, ready for him to fuck your throat. You heart was beating rapidly inside your chest, an irritating burn between your legs which wouldn’t disappear no matter how much you squirmed on the spot.
He gathered your hair into a makeshift ponytail, jerking your head even higher and you opened wide. You knew how to suck dick, but this type of force was different. You were at the mercy of Seokjin effectively, no other option, in the eyes of the viewer, but to cope with what he was giving you.
You were very aware of the camera as Seokjin eased his cock into your mouth, thrusting that bit further and further until you were able to handle his entire length. The lens had the perfect view of how your eyes began to water, of how your mouth stretched painfully open, lipstick now spread around your chin. You told yourself to relax, remembering to take calming breaths, and in fact, you found yourself enjoying it. Each time Seokjin hit the back of your throat a noise tore from somewhere deep in your throat, it was a retching sound you’d never quite heard before, but it vibrated through your body and found home in your pussy. You were so desperate to get fucked by now, and no, that wasn’t your character speaking.
Seokjin granted you respite after one partially harsh thrust, rammed inside you for a few seconds before he pulled back. You gagged immediately, strings of saliva snapping from his soaked length as you drooled all over yourself. Weaving one hand through your hair he pulled you closer, his breathing wrecked, his voice tight as he shoved his cock back in your mouth. “Be a good little slut and take it.”
You moaned in acknowledgment, ignoring the burn in your jaw and the awful feeling of your spit drying on your skin.
From the way he now fucked your throat faster, his thrusts losing their initial precision, you knew he was close. Yet no matter how rough he got, his hold on the back of your head was gentle. It was a permanent reminder that he was there and he was looking out for you, looking after you.
“Should I cum down your throat?” He rasped, panting by now, your intuition correct. Just a few more lines and Brian would take a pause, adjusting camera angles for the cum shot. You keened loudly, letting Seokjin push you back against the cabinets of the counter with the force of his thrusts. His hand stopping any contact your head would have had with the edge.
“Cum so far down your throat you’re drowning in it,” he continued. His voice sounded nothing like what you were used to. It sent you wild.
He pulled away abruptly, clutching your face to look up at him, and sneered. “Look at you, what a fucking mess.” There was no doubt about it. You were sure your mascara had run down your cheeks with your tears, your lips swollen, chin soaked.
With a hand wrapped around his drenched shaft he pulled back and swung it against your face. You gasped and then moaned when he repeated, relishing in the slapping, wet noise the action caused. “I’m going to cum all over your face.” He growled, head of his cock bulbous and near purple he was squeezing it so hard.
“Please,” you wailed, hands freeing from behind you to clutch at his thighs. “Please! I want your cum all over me!”
Seokjin let out a low sigh at the direction, stumbling back a little as he tried to get a hold of himself. Either he’d forgotten this scene was getting paused, or he was just so into it he needed a moment to collect. Both seemed to garner some sort of interest inside of your body.
“Aright, you close Jin?” Brian asked. “Ready for the cum shot?”
“Yeah.” Seokjin chuckled weakly. “I’m more than close.”
He sounded more like himself now, but the veins in his neck were still strained, red blotches making their way up his throat. He turned his attention to you, sounding concerned. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you smiled, making sure to not rub at your face, continuity vital. You felt a little self-conscious.
You laughed. “Positive, Seokjin.”
“You handled that like a champ. I told you to stop at any time if you needed or wanted to.”
“I didn’t want to.” At that revelation your eyes locked together, something turning the air. Brian interrupted, eager to get going.
“So, you’re okay to continue?”
You quickly looked away from Seokjin and turned to Brian, nodding. “Yep. Let’s go.”
He grinned and got back into action, giving directions. “Okay, Eric close up again. Seokjin, make sure you don’t obstruct the camera too much. As soon as you’re ready to cum move back a little. They want to see her face not your ass.”
Seokjin laughed, stepping towards you again, dick still in his fist. Your gaze kept dropping. “Noted.”
“Positions correct, 3, 2, 1, action.”
“Look at me.” Seokjin ordered, instantly back into character as he loomed over your kneeled form. You obeyed, hands on his thighs, and opened your mouth when he pushed the blunt head of his cock against your sticky lips.
This time the ache in your jaw made it hard to concentrate as Seokjin thrust repeatedly, your back hitting the cabinet each time. Thud. Thud. Thud. You endured everything though, because you knew Seokjin was only a few minutes away from coming, and truthfully, you couldn’t wait. This had been one of your favourite scenes to write up after all.
“I said, look at me,” he repeated as you slobbered all over his cock, the deep retching noises back. “Look at me when you’re gagging on my cock.”
You tried to make him out through tearstained eyes, his face blurred, and squeezed your legs together tightly. You could hear him breathing shallowly, a mixture of grunts and moans leaving him as he got closer and closer, and when he slid his cock from your throat one last time you braced yourself.
With four rapid pumps of his fist, he was coming all over your face.
Thick, white spurts landed, on your lips, on your chin, cheeks, nose. The last shot landed just above your eyebrow, slowly sliding down your eyelid and getting stuck in your lashes.
Seokjin let his cock drop and made for you, cupping the sides of your face as he caressed you, not minding that he was spreading his cum even further in places. He wanted to do that. He looked into your eyes, his filled with awe. “Now that’s a vision of beauty.”
You moaned softly, reaching for his shoulders as you tried to kiss him. He pushed you away with a chuckle. “You brainless slut. Look at you. You love my cum. It’s made you all sappy.” He was belittling you. “Love my cum all over your face. Gonna love it more when it’s deep inside that tight cunt of yours.”
At those words your vagina clenched. God, you needed him to fuck you. You were growing impatient. You watched him straighten up and stand back, casually taking in the sight of you. You had to hold your left eye closed, not wanting to get cum in it and stall the scene.
He cocked his head, unbuttoning the rest of his shirt as he spoke. “Have you ever wondered what makes my filling so creamy. My doughnuts are the best in town. Everybody loves them.”
He squatted in front of you now, you were still knelt against the counter. Ghosting a finger over your face, he collected the cum that had congealed along your eyelid, making things easier for you. Your heart warmed with gratitude. Originally, he was supposed to drag his finger along your cheek.
He brought the cum to your mouth and spoke gently. “Just a small bit. My secret ingredient. Have a taste.”
You sucked his finger into your mouth, making a show of it, humming happily, the taste of his cum so good. Seokjin grinned, visibly pleased. “Good girl,” he praised, before removing his shirt fully and passing it to you. “Now, Clean up.”
You listened, wiping your face down, waiting for the scene to get cut. When it did, Brian was full of praise. “That was perfect guys. Amazing. This movie is going to be the end of the world.”
After his thanks, Seokjin took the soiled shirt from you immediately, dropping it behind him for someone to clean up. “You okay? Throat okay?” He asked, checking up on you. “Need something to drink?”
“Actually, yeah,” you croaked, shifting to sit down. Your knees were sore as hell.
Seokjin looked around, waving to get attention. “Hey, can we get some water please?”
“Get up on the counter.”
Seokjin had a terrific refractory period, and after a short break he was ready to continue, half hard as he ordered you into position. You were past the halfway point now, the end it sight, yet you still hadn’t been fucked properly yet. Not that you had long to wait now. Knelt on all fours, ass in the air, you waited for Seokjin to climb up behind you. You looked into the lens in front of you, panting, trying to recreate how fucked out you’d been twenty minutes previous.
You shuddered when you felt Seokjin’s hands on your bare ass, stroking down the flesh with his fingertips. “What a pretty asshole you have,” he practically purred. You physically jolted at his words. “Is it tight? It looks tight.”
When you didn’t reply straight away he spanked you. The noise rang out. “Answer me!”
“Yes–!” You cried, lunging forward. “It’s tight, it’s really tight!”
“Mm.” He was satisfied, giving you another little tap, much gentler this time. He spread both cheeks apart, inspecting the private ring of tight muscle. “Your cunt may not be a virgin, but your ass is.” A fingertip hovered over it, you instinctively pushed back. He loved that.
“Just imagining how good it would feel to have my cock stuffed so far up that pretty little ass of yours I’m making you cry.” He grunted at the thought. “I’m getting hard again. See what you do to me?”
“Please,” you whimpered pathetically, a rush of heat flowing through you when he began circling the extra sensitive hole.
“But I would break you, angel,” he said matter-of-factly, still teasing you. “You know how long and thick my cock is. Your mouth struggled enough.”
You whined, circling your ass to his motion until finally he lowered himself down, his hot breath fanning over your sensitive asshole. His mouth kissed the round of your ass softly before he inched closer. “Just a taste…”
You moaned softly as the tip of his tongue flicked out, little hairs all over your body pricking up. He was so light with his actions it drove you crazy and before long you started grinding against his face.
“You like that?” He whispered, flattening his tongue when you moaned louder. He let you grind against it for a moment, finding your bearings as your character got used to the new sensation, but he began curling it upwards, catching your hole, making you tremble. He sped up, taking over, and you felt his fingers of one hand reach for your core, slipping two fingers inside right off the bat, palm up. His other hand rested against the top of your ass, keeping you still as you started to moan louder, body jerking as he fingered you.
“Such a good little slut for me,” he praised, your pussy beginning to squelch when he scissored his fingers inside of you. He pushed his tongue inside your ass now, just a couple of millimetres but it was enough to send you spasming. Fucking you with it, he moaned, the vibrations just adding to the insane pleasure.
“Maybe if I hire you I can train you up, fill that ass of yours like you so desperately want.”
“I-I’d love that,” you cried, head flying back, your hair wild against your back.
Seokjin’s thumb pressed up against your clit, knowing you needed to cum for this scene, but in all honesty, you didn’t think you needed the help. His fingers were pressed deep inside of you, his tongue still making you come undone, and it wasn’t long before you were tensing up, moans becoming hysteric.
“You’re going to cum again,” he growled against you. “I want your cunt as tight as it can get for my cock.” You gasped, orgasm hurtling towards you, your ass high up in the air, giving him all the access he needed.
He let out a patronising chuckle, amused by your antics. “You’re so fucking desperate. Are you sure you’re not a virgin?”
And just like that you came, collapsing down with the force.
“There you go,” Seokjin soothed just a few minutes later, slowly easing the tip of his cock inside your pussy. You were back on all fours as he knelt behind you. “Relax. I promise I’ll make you feel good.”
You only had to whimper, knowing this scene was all for show, camera one zoomed in to where your bodies joined as Seokjin slowly stuffed you with his cock. He pushed just an inch further and you cried out, forcing him to stop and act like you couldn’t fit him inside. He chuckled, caressing the curves of your ass. “Despite being hysterical your pussy can’t keep up. It’s okay, we’ll take it slow.”
He rocked his hips back and forth, effectively fucking you with just the head of his cock. You tried to keep patient and carry on acting, when really you just wanted him to sink all the way in and fuck you.
“I love breaking in new sluts,” he informed you, slipping a little further inside your aching hole. “They don’t last long though. Do you think you can?”
You made an incoherent noise, dropping your head as you tried with all your might not to push back into him. It was funny, your character was supposed to be struggling taking his cock when in reality you were struggling with being unable to have it all. You huffed out, eyes staring down the camera lens in front of you. “I-I…mmpfh—I can llllast,” you strained out, desperate and pleading.
You gasped when Seokjin spanked you, jerking forward. “Can’t even string a sentence together you’re so hungry for my cock. My cock that you can’t seem to fit.”
“I can!” You exclaimed, words flying out, unscripted. You needed to get a grip of yourself, you were losing direction.
“You can?” Seokjin repeated, improvising himself now. “I’ll fuck you faster then.”
Each thrust got him a little deeper until he was over halfway inside. Your palms pressed into the granite of the counter, planting yourself, bracing yourself.
“Good girl. You’re nearly there. Just a little more.” Seokjin praised. “This pussy’s so good for me, stretching over my monster cock, letting me fuck you deeper.”
You let out a moan as he finally filled you whole, stopping dead between your walls as they pulsed around him uncontrollably. He was so deep you couldn’t breathe for a moment, the pressure in your pussy and gut heavy, turning you light-headed.
“Fucking amazing,” Seokjin groaned, rutting against you. “So wet and warm, and tight.” Excruciatingly slowly he dragged out of you, just the tip left inside before he slammed back in. You cried out, doing so each time he repeated the action. By the end of it your knees shook, arms wobbling as they tried to hold you up.
Seokjin gripped your ass. “Stay up.” He ordered. “Let me fuck you how I want.” With gritted teeth you endured each thrust of his hips, skin thudding on skin. His movements weren’t fast, but harsh and determined, hitting deep each time.
He kept one palm flat just above your ass, his light panting filling the room. “With a pussy this good I’m not surprised you’ve spread your legs before. They’re probably lining up for a chance.” He caressed his way up and down your back with his fingertips, voice now soft. “They wouldn’t treat you like I do. Those other men. I’ll treat you like a princess.”
That elicited a sweet sigh from you.
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Give you a good fucking whenever you wanted. Anything you asked.” At his words he fucked you a little faster, your pussy squelching around his cock. “See?!” He exclaimed with a delighted laugh. “Your cunt was made for me. Hear how well it listens.”
“Please,” you begged, pushing into him. “Fuck me harder. I want to feel you everywhere. I want you to fuck all the memories of the other men away.”
Amused, he grabbed your hips. “How can I say no to that?”
You braced yourself, knowing what was coming next.
Seokjin fucked you so hard and fast your body jolted all over the place as you cried out. He towered over your body, reaching for your shoulders so he could hold you to him, make you take his powerful thrusts. That wasn’t enough, one hand reaching for your jaw, angling your head up as he fucked you hard, taking total control over you.
“Am I going to make you cry?” He goaded, your sobs racking through your body.
He let go of you suddenly, your body jerking forward and you felt him slam a foot onto the counter, his leg bent at the knee, able to get deeper like that. Your eyes were welling up, your moans not even sounding coherent now. It was just noise. Loud, hysterical noise. He grinded against you, his cock head rubbing against your cervix. He was so deep you felt sick.
“Nuh uh uh. Don’t wriggle away,” he told you, voice dangerously low.
You couldn’t remember if that was even scripted. Were you supposed to wriggle away or was your body resisting the intense pleasure overtaking your whole body? You couldn’t think, couldn’t feel anything other than Seokjin’s cock rammed inside of you.
“You asked for it.” He told you, bending his other leg now, both feet up on the counter, fucking his full body weight into you, fucking you animalistically. It took you everything not to collapse onto your stomach, trembling like crazy. “You want it deep, you’re getting deep. Nice and deep.”
You were going to cum. You knew you were supposed to hold off, scene not over yet, but you didn’t think you could hold back any longer. He was hitting so far inside you, you felt like you were turning blind, vision spotted. Seokjin grunted and groaned above you, his thrusts getting sloppier. Was he close too? Maybe you both needed to pace yourselves better, too preoccupied with giving your all.
With a sudden roar he flew back, taking you with him as he rested his ass against his heels, sitting you on top of his dick. “Move,” he panted, slapping the sides of your ass.
You hesitated for a moment, shock probably noticeable on your face, but you ran with it. This wasn’t a part of the scene, but you guessed Seokjin had to stop fucking you like that before he came. You bounced up and down his cock, slowly at first, needing to catch your breath as much as him.
After a few moments he spoke. “You love it. You love my cock.” He grabbed your hips, bouncing you a little faster and you guessed he must be back in action.
You fell back into your original lines, changing them slightly to fit. “Yes! Yes, I love it so fucking much. Please fuck me again. Please keep fucking me.”
He obliged, getting you back onto all fours, yanking your ass high. “Such a greedy little pussy you have,” he commented, dipping his cock into your dripping hole.
You knew what was coming next yet still jumped when you felt his finger at your asshole.
“Just one go,” he murmured. “Let me feel how warm and tight that ass of yours is. Let me have just that…”
“Yes!” You moaned. “Please. I need you.”
Your stomach tightened in anticipation when he shoved his hand between your legs, collecting your arousal onto his fingers to lubricate you naturally. He rubbed the tight ring of muscle, easing it open, his cock now lodged in your pussy as he slowly pushed his middle finger into your ass.
You moaned at the intrusion, pushing back into him, needing him to fuck you again with his finger hooked into your ass. He started to thrust, fucking you good. Not as harsh as before, nor as quickly, just revelling in the sweetness of your body.
“Good girl,” he praised, curling his finger a little. The point wasn’t to stretch you out as such, but just to be inside. To be filling both holes and teasing the audience. “Touch yourself,” he told you, reaching for one of your hands. “Put your hand between your legs and make yourself cum.”
You rubbed on your clit like crazy, relieved you could finally let go after so long waiting. You concentrated on the way his cock felt inside you, the way his finger in your ass ever so slightly started fucking you too. You were so goddamn sensitive right now, and it wasn’t long at all before you were whining, bouncing with each thrust he gave you as your clit finally gave in. You gasped for breath, staring straight into the camera as you came.
“Ffffuckkk,” Seokjin exhaled, feeling you clenching around him like crazy. You continued to push back into him, even after he removed his finger from your ass, his cock beginning to slide from you too. “Look at you. I’ve lost count of how many times you’ve cum and you still want more,” he spoke. “Maybe I shouldn’t give you this job. You’d be jumping my dick any chance you got. Horny fucking slut.”
“I’m your horny fucking slut,” you moaned desperately.
“Stop,” he warned, voice strained, and this time he removed his dick fully. “Do you want me to cum already? If you want me to fuck you so bad then I suggest you shut that pretty little mouth of yours.”
You whimpered. “Please, I need your cock in me. I need to feel you inside of me. I want you to fuck me. Please.”
Grinding against him, he pushed you away. “I said shut up. Do I have to gag you? Choke you to silence?” You moaned, in your head mentally preparing yourself for the next scene.
“Get on your back,” Seokjin ordered.
Still gasping for breath you tried your best to get it back to normal as the cameras changed angle. Seokjin was equally fucked out, you could hear him just heaving behind you, a hand resting on your hip to get your attention. The action made you extra jittery, unable to blame it on the orgasm you’d just had.
“I feel like I’ve run a marathon,” he panted, his eyes sparkling when you turned your head to look at him.
“Same,” you agreed with an almost coy smile. It was unlike you, to feel like this during a shoot, but his hand was still on your hip, almost as if he didn’t even realise – almost as if touching you came naturally. “I think I may die before this is over.”
Seokjin’s expression fell into panic, taking your dramatic words seriously. “We can take a break? Or we can cut a scene out. If it’s too much, if you’re not comfortable—
“Seokjin,” you interrupted, laughing at his overreaction. You moved to rest on one leg, able to see him better. His hand slipped away from your hip, the movement making him realise he’d been touching you. “I don’t want to change anything. I’m having fun. Honest.”
His eyes swept over your face, mouth opening to say something in return but then Brian was near, hand on Seokjin’s shoulder.
“Now remember, this can just be the test run,” he told you seriously. “This is an intense scene so it’s fine if you need a few tries.”
You nodded. “I understand. I’ll signal to Seokjin if I need to stop.” As you spoke you took Seokjin’s hand in yours, smiling up at him.
He smiled back, giving your fingers a squeeze. “I’ll try to be gentle, okay?”
A few minutes later you were flat on your back, head hanging off the counter as Seokjin stood loomed over you, his cock leisurely thrusting into your mouth.
“Is this the only way I can get you to shut the fuck up?” He barked, your jaw between his thumb and fingers as he kept your face steady. “My cock stuffed down your throat?”
You choked on a gag as he thrust further and tried desperately to moan around him. The vibrations seemed to drive him mad, voice sounding wanton when he spoke again. “Do you want it deeper? Want my cock so deep I can see it in your throat.”
You braced yourself as Seokjin pushed further, throat burning as he stretched inside. You concentrated on breathing through your nose, the five seconds he was lodged inside feeling like forever.
“You look so pretty like this.” His palm wrapped around your neck, a noise of satisfaction leaving him as he felt himself.
“Good girl,” he praised you as he finally removed himself, sliding from you carefully. You heaved as he got to your tonsils, gasping for breath when he was gone fully, welcoming the air that filled your lungs. Gloops of your own spit landed on your face and dripped into your hair.
Seokjin rubbed his drenched cock all over your cheeks and around your open mouth, caking you in the process. “Oops. What a mess… I like making a mess of you.”
His voice was deep, sending bolts up your pussy. You moaned and wriggled against the counter, desperate to be touched, but your hands stayed flat to the granite.
Acting like he’d only just noticed, Seokjin’s arm leaned over your body, fingers rubbing at your clit in a way that deliberately gave no relief. “Can I reach your pussy from here? Wriggling around like a desperate slut. Is suffocating on my cock not enough for you?”
He stopped his evil ministrations, grabbing both of your hands to bring them up to his cock that was still resting on your face. “Use your hands. Make me feel good. Pleasure me.”
You got to work, neck beginning to ache but you ignored that to run your fists up and down his wet dick, it squelched between your fingers and you leaned up to flick your tongue against the tip, digging into his slit. You moaned in satisfaction, able to still taste your arousal on him even after he’d been inches deep inside your throat.
Amused, he cackled. “God, you love my cock so much. Such a hungry little slut. Bet you wanted me to give it to you from the moment you walked in here.”
You moaned again, very loudly this time, it tore from your throat and you dropped one hand between your legs, surprised you still remembered your directions.
“Look how desperate you are, rubbing your clit.” Seokjin sounded amazed and patronising at the same time. “You’re such a fucking slut.”
He leaned over your body, snatching the hand still around his cock away to meet the other one between your legs. “Stretch your pussy out for me. Keep that hole fucking open.” He ordered you.
Obeying immediately you used both hands to pull your lips apart, knowing the camera in front of you had the most perfect view inside. You had never been into close ups like this, but they seemed to be very popular. Whatever got people off, you guessed…
At the angle Seokjin was in, his balls rested against your mouth, and you licked a strip up the middle before sucking on the hot skin. Seokjin let out a grunt, thighs tightening around your head and you popped one into your mouth, sucking softly. He let out a tiny sigh, a surprising sound, and to punish you he brought his palm down onto your pussy, spanking the spread flesh. You cried out, painful pleasure exploding through your body.
“Please fuck me again,” you whimpered against his balls, throat dry.
He chuckled darkly, straightening up to drag his cock all over your face again. He pulled it back to hit your cheek casually. “I think I’ll let you do all the work now. Earn your place. Show me you can take initiative. So far you’ve been a drooling, disorientated mess.”
“Water, please,” Seokjin called immediately, holding the back of your head as you sat up.
A bottle soon in your hand you sipped.
“You’ll be a pro soon,” he teased.
“Excuse you,” you looked up at him, feigning offence. “As if I’m not already.” There were no first tries when it came to you, especially with this last movie. You were truly giving your all and enjoying yourself with it.
You felt Seokjin’s fingertips at your neck, softly massaging any aches that may have appeared from the strain of holding your head up for so long. You let yourself push back into the touch, eyes half closing in enjoyment. “You’re okay though?” He asked, concern colouring his tone.
“More than okay!”
You were about to ride dick after all.
“Fuck me. Ride my dick,” Seokjin panted, back flat to the counter as you sat above him, bouncing up at down. His hands were clasped around your middle, propelling you higher, faster, as you cried out. “Use me like one of your sex toys you’re too ashamed to say you own.”
Moving to squat, hands behind you, pressed to his thighs, you took him deeper, puffing for breath as you sped up, ignoring the ache in your limbs that had started to set in.
“That’s it,” he grunted. “Fuck me however you want. Fuck me how you like it.” He started to raise his hips up, the head of his cock hitting you hard every time you thrusted down and you whimpered, spasming around him.
“Tell me how much you like it. Talk fucking dirty to me,” he demanded, now meeting each bounce of your ass.
You keened, falling to your knees with a thud, ceasing your own movement just to feel each stroke of his cock. “Your cock feels so good inside of my pussy. I love it!” He gripped a hold of your hips, slamming up into you, his ass banging against the counter rapidly. “Please never stop fucking me. Pleas—eee.”
He clenched his teeth, breathing through them heavily. “I’d fuck this pussy forever if you wanted me to.”
“Please—!” You cried, head falling back, your tits bouncing up and down with the force of his fucking. “Fuck this pussy forever.”
“Call it a cunt.” The word shot straight through you. “I want to hear that word from your fucking mouth.”
“Fuck my cunt!” You practically shouted, moans sounding more like sobs as time went on. “Fuck my tight, wet cunt until you break me.”
“As you wish.” Seokjin picked up the force, crashing into you. You held onto his chest, anchoring yourself to him. “This pussy fucking sings for me. Listen to yourself. Such a needy fucking slut.”
The squelching just got louder, the sex getting sloppier. Your slick clung to the inside of your thighs, ran between the crack of your ass. You were soaked, and so was he. It caked his pubic hair, and somehow, sheened up his abs.
“Fuck, you’re amazing,” he gasped out, and you faltered for a moment, realising that wasn’t one of his lines.
He hadn’t seemed to notice, sitting up to wrap his hand around your neck and pull you closer, as per the script. The kiss he planted on your mouth wasn’t a part of it though. He kissed you hungrily, letting the grunts just fall out of him. You kissed him back, moaning into his mouth and bouncing with his thrusts as he clutched your throat. You couldn’t even remember where the cameras were anymore. Didn’t care about who was watching. All you could think and feel was Seokjin. How good his cock felt inside you, how warm and safe it felt with his hand wrapped around your neck and how good he tasted, how soft his tongue was, how it made you shiver when he flicked it over yours, sucking the muscle ever so softly, absolutely ruining you.
He pulled back slowly, his eyes black and his thrusts stopped. Your breath hitched as you stared at him, waiting for him to speak.
“Turn around. I want to see that tight ass, imagine I’m fucking it.”
It was a wonder you didn’t cum on the spot, pussy heavy with desire.
Not long after, you were facing camera one, jutted forward as you rolled up and down Seokjin’s cock, his nails digging into your ass.
“Come on, you can ride my cock better than that.” He berated. Pulling your hair he got your back straight. “Bounce up at down on it.”
You listened, spreading your legs around his thighs as you lifted your hips up and down, giving the camera another amazing view of your stretched pussy. He held your middle, pushing you forward to get a view of his cock. “Your pussy is magic. Sucking my big, fat cock right up, and it’s still so fucking tight—!” He moaned the last word, sitting up to thrust into you.
The pace he’d started with knocked you forward, your hands reaching in front of you for something to grip. His thighs. “I’m—going—to—fucking—ruin—you,” he bit out, thrusting into you to punctuate each word. “Fucking split you open.”
He fucked you like that for a while, hard and fast before pulling you into squatting position again, easing back down on his back slightly. Your legs shook as he fucked into you, holding onto the counter to keep your balance. He got deep like this, slamming straight up into your walls that clenched and burned around him. “You gonna cum again?” He asked.
“I-I can’t,” you stammered in between cries. At this point your character was supposed to be fucked out, unable to cum again without some serious drilling. In reality, you were ready to burst, Seokjin’s cock feeling so amazing you wanted to cry.
“Yes, you can,” he encouraged. “Come on, angel. Let go. I only want to make you feel good.”
You waited for as long as you could, counting only five more thrusts from him before an unimaginable heat began to spread up your body. “Oh, godddd,” you screamed, one of your hands falling back, needing to hold him as the sensation became too much. He clutched your hand tightly, feeling the force of your strongest orgasm yet.
You were on fire, your body feeling uncontrollable as your thighs quaked, your pussy too. It shuddered around Seokjin’s cock. “I’m coming, I’m coming, I’m going to cum!” You were unknowingly chanting, overcome, and when the pleasure got too much you had to push off his dick, crying out as a jolt of insane pleasure made its way through your body. Below you, wetness shot from between your legs, soaking the inside of your thighs.
You gasped, truly shocked, no acting necessary. Seokjin growled, sitting again, his chest against your back. He pushed you back onto his cock. “Keep fucking me,” he barked.
You hesitated, body confused. The scene was supposed to end here. You were supposed to cum and then take a shot break before the big finale. Only the squirting hadn’t been expected. Nor was Seokjin’s insistence that you kept fucking him.
Your ass twitched, thighs trembled and your insides burned at the feeling of Seokjin’s cock stretching you out again. Your walls were too sensitive, just feeling him again made you want to pass out.
“Keep fucking yourself on my dick,” he repeated, holding onto you as he started to move you.
“I-I can’t,” you insisted. This time it was all real. If you continued to fuck him you may explode. You were still so sensitive. You couldn’t handle the overstimulation.
Seokjin sounded so sure you began to believe it. How could you not continue when he believed in you this much? With a strained sound you pressed your knees into the granite and started dragging yourself over his cock again, each rake making your eyes roll back. You continued to twitch and shudder, much to Seokjin’s enjoyment.
“That’s it,” he gleed. “Show me how much you want this job. Show me how much your slutty pussy loves this. Take me all.”
His words spurred you on and you moved faster, it getting easier now. You could endure this because it felt so good. He felt so good. Seokjin listened to your body, knowing when you were ready for him to take over and before long he started fucking you again. Jiggling your body about like no tomorrow as he hit that spot again. The spot that had made you lose all control. He knew exactly what to do.
“Please, please, please,” you begged, forgetting that all this wasn’t scripted anymore. You spoke with sheer want.
He knew what you were begging for, his chest pressing into your back as he whispered against your ear. “Gonna make that pussy squirt harder?”
You moaned in reply, bracing yourself, lifting a little weight off his hips so he could fuck you with more freedom. You could do this. You’d done it once, and the need was still there, building up again. Seokjin had known he could get more out of you. He knew your body too well for someone who was fucking you for the first time.
“This time get it all over me. Get me all dirty with your cum. I love a slut who can squirt.”
At that your body jerked, your pussy clenching and you pushed down, now understanding the feeling. At the right moment Seokjin shoved you off of him, your cum spraying everywhere, much more than last time. It soaked his crotch, his thighs, the counter.
You were near hysterical when you collapsed into him, feeling him wrap his arms around you, holding you tight as you struggled for breath, legs like jello.
“Fucking beautiful.” He panted, kissing the side of your face wildly. “Good girl. You did well.”
The set came to life again but you felt like you weren’t a part of it. Your ears were ringing, your head dizzy, and you just sat in Seokjin’s arms for a moment, trying to come to.
“Woah,” Brain let out with a surprised laugh. “That was great improv guys. You don’t even need me here.”
You heard Seokjin chuckle in your ear, his dick hard between your ass. “I just saw an opportunity and went with it. Holy shit,” he sighed, rubbing his face with his hand.
Brian walked off to talk to Eric and Jack, probably wondering if they’d caught all that, and you tilted your head back to look at Seokjin, still speechless. He chuckled again when he saw you. “That was…insane, right?”
You were still a little breathless. “It was,” you agreed. “And so…”
“Unexpected?” He tried for you. You puffed out a laugh and nodded. So unexpected, but it wasn’t the word you were going for. “You’re fine though, right? I didn’t do anything to make you feel uncomfortable?”
“Of course you didn’t,” you scoffed. “I could’ve stopped you at any time. It was…hot.”
Hot. That was the word. The hottest moment you’d shared in your five year career most definitely.
The way he looked at you told you he agreed with your word choice. “I’m surprised I didn’t bust a nut the moment you started screaming.”
“I’m sorry, I…” Despite everything, you were excited to watch that scene back. You could feel damp beneath you. “I got you all wet.”
“Do not apologise. I’m honoured to have your cum all over me.”
You jerked him with your elbow, his playfulness turning you a little bashful. He was such a flirt at times.
“Can we have a towel over here?” Brian called to the staff, coming back over. “Let’s take five. You guys need to reserve your energy. It’s nearly the big finale.”
Seokjin sat you both up, unwrapping his arms from your body to get ready to clean up.
“I probably look a mess,” you grumbled. Unsure why you’d only come to that realisation now. Parts of your hair were tangled with your spit and Seokjin’s cum, and God knows what your make up looked like now. Your lips still felt a little swollen from the kiss you’d shared.
The kiss. You suddenly remembered it, just as he leaned forward, staring into your eyes as he pushed some of your hair behind you ear.
“You look beautiful,” he reassured with a smile.
“Yes, open those legs for me,” Seokjin spoke under his breath, soaking in the sight as you spread on the counter. He stood before you, gripping the base of his cock in his fist. “God, your cunt looks so swollen. Do you think you can take much more?”
You nodded wildly, whining. “I can take it. I neeed it.”
Collecting saliva inside his mouth he spat it directly onto your vagina, rubbing it in with his hand, getting you extra wet. You moaned indulgently, only a little sensitive now that you’d taken a break. When he pushed the head of his cock inside, inch by glorious inch, your moaning got louder. He began to fuck you slowly, rolling his hips against your ass, grinding deep over and over again.
“You’re so fucking tight now, angel,” he said sweetly, hands on your thighs, keeping them open. “All that coming closed you up. I can barely move my cock inside you.”
You whined. “Please keep fucking me. I can take it. You’ll see.”
He stepped closer, rocking his body, tilting his head in amusement when he noticed something. “I can see myself.”
You looked down just as Seokjin was palming the slight bulge in your pelvis every time he pushed deeper. You moaned at the sight. “You’re so wonderful. I think I may keep you.”
Reaching for your left leg he lifted it to him, folding it at the knee so he could kiss your foot, his tongue coming out to trail along your toes before he began sucking them softly.
You moaned quietly as he continued to fuck you, caressing your foot. You would never understand the obsession with feet in porn, but right now, you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t turning you on. Each kiss, each stoke of his tongue, got you more sensitive. When he started rolling your clit between his thumb and forefinger, that was it, stimulation overdose.
You lifted your hips, circling them to the rhythm of his ministrations, and he hummed, contemplating something as he watched you writhe. “What if I want you to cum again?”
Even though that was a part of the last scene, your stomach still got all jittery at the thought, falling victim to Seokjin’s actions. You could cum again alright. Anything he wanted.
“I’ve made this pussy cum so many times. What’s one more to add to the list? Does this pussy want to cum one last time?”
“Yes! Yessss.” You half begged. “I-it does.”
That’s all he needed to hear. Slipping out of you and climbing onto the counter he took your legs from behind your knees and lifted them up, your ass rising off the countertop. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”
He raised you higher. Your shoulders and head the only thing left pressing into the granite as he crouched over you, lining his cock at your opening, ready to piledrive you. He plunged inside, taking your breath away.
“Keep those legs up.” He ordered, and you gripped onto your trembling limbs, groaning as he fucked you. “You like a good drilling, huh?” The grunts fell from him freely, your walls clenching around him with each plunge. “Will you be my good little slut?”
You began chanting yes, feeling pressure heavy in the pit of your stomach.
“If I hire you, you’ll let me fuck you whenever I want. You won’t be able to walk home most days. I’m going to treat this pussy so good, this cunt…” His voice broke, moaning loudly. “I’ll fucking worship it—worship you.” He grunted again, movements jerky now.
He’d be allowed to cum soon. Just a little bit longer.
“God, you feel so fucking amazing,” he groaned, gripping your hips. “Cum now. Cum before you ruin me.”
It tore through your body with a cry from you, your exhausted but eager pussy squeezing around Seokjin’s cock with a vicelike grip. He fell forward but caught himself, pulling out of you to hike you up the counter, lying you back down. Caging around you, he clutched at your face, making you look at him as you moaned uncontrollably.
“Next time I shove my cock inside you, I’m going to cum.” He rasped. “I’m going to fill up that tight, slutty pussy of yours and you’re going to let me, okay?”
You moaned louder, sounding drunk as wrapped your legs around him tightly and spoke. “Mm. Want your cum. Want your cum inside my pussy.”
“Good girl,” he praised, grabbing his cock to push inside you. He fucked you quickly, messily, no real rhythm, he just wanted to cum. “Let me use you one last time.”
Pulling back on his heels he lifted your legs, holding them together by the ankles as he thrust back and forth, watching the way your swollen heat continued to take him. “Your poor broken pussy… Oh, you‘ve been a good girl. A good little slut. You’ve lasted so well. No surprise when you have such a magic cunt.”
You moaned at his admiration, looking up at him, your eyes begging him to cum. His pace hastened, panting crazily, before it inevitably slowed down, indulging himself as he got ready to release. On cue, he grunted, pushing his cock as far as it could go and you felt it pulse. You relished in the long drawn-out groan he gave you, circling your hips as he spilled his cum inside of you.
Camera one zoomed in as he pulled out, getting a close up of the infamous creampie.
“Spread your legs. Let me see you,” Seokjin told you, voice fucked out as he tried to calm his breathing. He dropped your legs and you opened them wide. “Ah. I’ve cum so deep you can’t see it.” He rubbed your clit a little, as if petting an animal. “Your pussy’s so greedy.”
You giggled and Seokjin smirked. “You find that funny, do you? I’ll remember that for next time. Squeeze. I want to see myself.”
You obeyed, pushing down until his cum appeared, dribbling out of your hole and running down your ass. The camera caught everything.
“Stunning,” Seokjin awed. He looked up at you, camera two on both of you. “Do you still remember the motto? Answer correctly and I promise it will change your life forever.”
You grinned, eyes glassy but speaking perfectly clear. “The magic is always in the hole.”
“Indeed it is,” Seokjin murmured, gaze back on your pussy. “You’re hired, angel.”
There was a tap on your dressing room door, and you looked up to see Seokjin’s head popping around the corner. “Hey.”
“Hey,” you smiled, feeling unexplainably jittery. “You’re going already?” He had his bag around his shoulder, a baseball cap on, dressed casually now, the Seokjin you were used to.
“Yeah. My manager’s surprised me with a celebratory retirement dinner. Secret retirement dinner,” he corrected with a laugh. It was still only you and his agency who knew about his plans.
“Oh, that’s lovely. Enjoy.” You couldn’t stop the feeling of disappointment though. You hadn’t realised he’d leave so early. You hadn’t even gotten a chance to speak after the shoot was over.
“Thanks,” he smiled before hesitating. “I, uh… I just wanted to check in on you. See if you’re okay.” Scratching the back of his head he didn’t meet your eyes when he spoke next. “I was actually going to invite you for dinner at my place tonight, but well, this sort of got sprung on me and I can’t say no. How about tomorrow?”
Your heart started beating really fast. Dinner at his place? You’d never been to his home. You panicked. “It’s fine, Seokjin. There’s really no need.”
“No, I want to though.” He insisted, finally looking up. “We can talk. Discuss today and…other things.”
The way he looked at you made you come over all funny, and the vagueness of his words didn’t help.
“Editing will start soon and then things will just get busier for us both, a lot more hectic. I just wanted some chill time. I think we both deserve it.”
What did he mean? There was something in the air between you. Something had changed today. Something had been changing for a while possibly. You could feel it, you weren’t going crazy, surely?
He waited for your answer patiently.
“Yes,” you blurted. You tried again. “Yes, okay. That sounds lovely.”
He beamed. “So, tomorrow?”
“I’ll be there,” you giggled. “Maybe I’ll be limping, but I’ll be there.” His face fell in horror. You laughed harder. “Seokjin, I’m just joking. Lighten up.”
He relaxed. “Right.” He tapped the door. “Right. Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
You smiled coyly, feeling it again. It was almost like he hadn’t fucked you silly all day. You were just two people, two friends, wondering where you stood with one another. If things ran deeper than just friendship… The thought was kind of scary, but at the same time it wasn’t.
“Looking forward to it,” you told him finally.
“Likewise.” He smiled softly, gaze lingering on yours before he had to leave.
You stared at the door for a few moments, grinning to yourself as you imagined what tomorrow might hold.
What the future might hold.
Written 2020. Reworked/Edited 2021
Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed.
© floralseokjin 2021
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