#quinn is very good at making up stories to the point where she believes them even if she knows they're not true

[merp-blerp]

Why I think Rachel Berry is Autistic/Neurodivergent (Coded)

So I think Brittany is the best example of an autistic Glee character, but i think you could make a case for Rachel too. I don’t want to pretend Rachel would be the greatest representation of autistics ever or anything, but I like neurodivergent headcanons as a neurodivergent person and neurodivergent representation is very lacking in quality and quantity, so we currently must make do with coded characters. This is all just my theory, and I don't even claim it to be perfectly air-tight. It's more than okay to disagree with me. Don’t take it too seriously, this is all in good, self-indulgent fun. I should note that I don’t have any credentials to diagnose anyone; I don’t recommend using this as a way of diagnosing yourself. They’re are better forms of research you could do. I also apologize if this post offends any fellow neurodivergent people. Rachel can be a particularly negative character for some and I don’t mean to imply that all neurodivergent people are like her or that neurodivergents that do see themselves in her are bad; I also see some of myself in her a bit and this neurodivergent interpretation of her makes me like and understand her a bit better. I also don’t want to make it seem like I think neurodivergence is a negative thing inherently. It isn’t at all. I think Rachel’s personality could make her do negative things, but the neurodivergence itself isn’t negative. The post was very inspired by @smolbrittana and their post on Britt’s neurodivergence. Definitely recommend it you’re interested.

So let’s start with some autistic traits and assessing how they might fit Rachel:

Special Interest/Hyperinflations

Barbara Streisand, Funny Girl, West Side Story, theatrical things in general. Need I say more? I will, no matter what you think. Rachel is obviously very obsessive over the things she likes, but also what she wants. From wanting tons of attention from her various crushes in high school, wanting Quinn’s friendship, wanting to be a the best constantly, getting into NYADA and not even really considering alternatives, etc. These are flaws in her character in some situations, but I don’t think it comes from a place of malice… typically. The crackhouse stuff was messed up, but I think this comes from her brain just latching onto things, to the point where these things become a part of her personality almost and in her head there’s no alternative positive situation conceivable to her other than getting what she wants. All or nothing. If something doesn’t happen the way she wants it it feels like a personal attack. Like being a star and shaping her life around being like her idols, but when she feels like someone could upstage her she… sends them to a crackhouse. I bet the reason why she’s so talented from such an early age is because she hyperfixated on being great at what she want to be, great like Barbara Streisand. I also think that this is why Rachel is so forgiving. She hyperfixates on belonging and others liking her, so she’s willing to forgive those around her no matter what they’ve done to her, best example being Quinn. She obsesses over her own perfection; for example, her NYADA audition where she messes up and feels like she has to completely start over and perfect it all the way through rather than continue through it (which I believe is what you’re supposed to do in a situation like that—I know I’ve seen real broadway actors push though their mistakes). Perfection is the only option to her at times.

Social Difficulties

Rachel is not good at social interactions. I think she feels things very intensely and sometimes can’t “properly” express emotions, at least not in a neurotypical way, therefore coming off as awkward or like a jerk. Sometimes she is a jerk, but I digress. Her first interactions with Finn are very awkward because of the way she goes about them. She goes in too strong, clearly feeling a lot for him already, and freaks him out, but it happened to be in a way that seemingly still endeared him. From his perspective, she’s also just… off putting, probably, because she’s neurodivergent and he’s neurotypical. He still falls for and cares for her, of course, but knows she’s different. Essentially in Season 1-2, her interactions with others are often turned up to eleven in terms of intensity/awkwardness.

“Abnormal” Speech

In the early seasons Rachel has this very fast, high-pitched, matter-of-fact way of speaking. This speech pattern goes away as the series goes on so gradually it might not even be noticed till it’s gone (and I have a theory on why it goes away, but more on that later). I think it’s departure is most noticeable in S4 E12, where Rachel imagines communicating with her younger self. There’s a clear difference in how to two Rachels talk and even sing and it’s interesting to see that contrast (and I gotta applaud Lea for being able to show that, however annoying, she is talented). She also has a very colorful vocabulary, which could also be a symptom.

Intense Emotions & Aggression

Totally. Rachel gets very upset when she doesn’t get her way, to a fault sometimes. Her taking it so personally when Tina was chosen to play Maria in West Side Story, saying it was “my part” (another example of her connecting to her special interest so personally). Her pissed off behavior towards Finn after she tried to cheat on him with Puck and kept telling him to forgive her rather than letting him come to a conclusion himself in S2 was very unselfaware. Sending Sunshine to a crackhouse when she felt threatened by her talent. Disrespecting her dance teacher when she grades her “Oops I Did It Again” number. She takes what she perceives as threats very personally, which might be a Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) thing. Santana has a lot of rage, but damn so does Rachel. This could also be related to her feeling very intensely about her special interests or her strong sense of justice, which I’ll get into later.

Hyper-empathy/Low empathy

Rachel’s tendency to not take other’s feelings into account might exhibit low empathy. Now, it’s worth saying that just because a person doesn’t have emotional or cognitive empathy doesn’t mean they’re a bad person. I believe that as long as they’re able to have sympathy and/or compassion they’re good. Empathy is like being able to put yourself in someone’s shoes; feel the things they feel on a personal level, whether you’ve been though what they have or not. Sympathy is only being able to look a those shoes; seeing and logically understanding the other’s emotions, but not feeling them on a personal level. And you can still show compassion either way.

Stimming/Fidgeting

Now this one was hard to find evidence for, and that’s fine. Not every neurodivergent person stims or fidgets in a particularly neurodivergent way. Most people, neurodivergent or not, stims in some way. Any movement can be stimming. I feel like that fast, peppy walk thing she does, particularly when she’s angry, might be a stimy thing. Like she has so much stimulation that she has to really move and get it out of her system. I also do this when something excites me. I’m pretty sure I remember Santana (?) calling it a “bird walk” or something and said that she walk with a “weird pointy toe” way. Rachel’s body language does remind me of a bird some times, like how when she’s upset she’ll move her head in these very quick, twitchy or jerky movements. She holds herself in a certain way when she sings, which became most apparent to me when Jenna Ushkowitz (Tina’s actresses) talked about mimicking these movements in the behind-the-scenes for S3 E20. She jumps up and down and touches her face when she’s happy, and presses her face against the wall when she’s distressed. Might be stimy things too.

“Abnormal” Body language

Rachel has some very upright posture. It’s very proper in the earlier seasons. Somewhat “stiff��, if you will. Her facial expressions are very, for lack of a better word I can think of, extreme. Always the most they could be. If she’s smiling, she’s really smiling. If she’s crying, she’s really crying. Et cetera, et cetera. Like her speech, this relaxes as she gets older, however, I’ve noticed that during her time with Funny Girl, especially during the understudy auditions and her fight with Santana, both her straight lace posture and body language, “bird” mannerism, odd speech pattern, and other traits comes up again, but for the negative. It was like Rachel was hurt and regressed.

Anxiety & Depression

As I mentioned, Rachel regresses into a negative version of her traits in S5. This isn’t to excuse her, I hate Rachel’s actions during this plot-line as much as the next guy, but this could explain it. I’ve theorized that Finn’s death, the pressure of being on Broadway and the excitement yet anxiety of reaching her dreams so quickly to the point where she felt stuck in monotony might have made her somewhat regress back to how she was in early high school after having grown past it. Like she wanted things to be the way they had been before and lashed out against her own success, almost subconsciously/unknowingly sabotaging herself due to this regression. And then after losing her TV show she’s at her lowest in terms of people seeing her talent as something worth putting value into and she does have her come-to-Jesus moment when she goes back home, her actions finally weighting on her and her having to rebuild herself. Somewhat alternately, you could say that Rachel started masking in New York; maybe she knew that not masking in high school made her a target for bullying, so in NYADA she attempted to mask her neurodivergent traits so she could fit in better. This could explain her change in clothes, makeup, mannerisms, speak-pattern, et cetera. Of course, you can’t truly hide you neurodivergent traits, so Rachel is still quite othered in NYADA. Neurotypicals often can tell when someone’s neurodivergent though subjective social data and other them, whether they know they’re doing that or not. So her masking leads to a breakdown because masking is exhausting and painful for a lot of neurodivergents. She breaks. A covert mental breakdown is honestly the only way I can rationalize her leaving Broadway for TV; logically it doesn’t make much sense for her to have done that in my opinion. That’s why I think returning to Lima was good for her to start fresh and grow again in S6. A part of me almost wants to call it a neurodivergent burn-out or masking that led to a shutdown/meltdown. Rachel definitely fits the quota for “gifted kid syndrome”, being surrounded by yes-men all her childhood, and that could led to burn-out when you’re no longer around that. I think Rachel had been struggling for a while but hadn’t expressed it in a healthy way that was true to herself and so she didn’t really process her feelings or shit actions till her “meltdown/shutdown”, if you will, till S6. But that’s just a theory on what happened to her character. It’s hard to assess this part of Rachel’s arc because even though I think it could’ve made sense and it could’ve been interesting, it ended up being one of the worse written plot points of the show, and that is saying something because Glee fans are well aware this show’s not a perfect masterpiece.

Gifted Kid Syndrome

Many autistic people are seen as gifted or special in youth, and sometimes that expands into adulthood. Rachel definitely was seen this way by others and saw herself that way too. There are countless examples of character going on about how talented Rachel is at singing, whether they’re praising her or insulting her. And we know from the first episode of the series that she’s been seen that way for a while.

Rituals, Sensory Processing, and Perfectionism

Rachel has a strict morning schedule and moisturizing ritual. She also flosses between classes, which could be a ritual thing and/or a sensory thing. I feel like her very preppy clothing style in the early season could’ve also been a ritual thing and/or a sensory thing. It’s like she had to dress this way either because it’s a routinely thing or because she felt uncomfortably in other clothes (probably routine, because she does stop dressing like that in the later season, unfortunately—that style was so cute. But hey, putting yourself through clothing sensory hell for the sake of masking, due to the fact people made fun of your preferred clothes in the past, could add to that meltdown/shutdown theory I have). She also has moments where, while stressed, she rest the top of her head on the wall. Also likely a sensory thing to me. She seems very strict on these being done perfectly. She can’t do imperfection and things not being done her way. (Also, I don’t know how true it is, but I swear I remember hearing a trait of autism could be having perfect pitch. Of course Rachel seems to, but I’m not a super smart music person so I don’t know how to tell myself).

Deep intreats in animal

Rachel often wears animal themed clothing in the early seasons and she’s vegan. She also berated that woman for caring her service dog in her purse in S5 E19, assuming she knew more about the woman’s service dog needs than the woman herself. She cares about animals a lot.

A strong sense of justice

This part of Rachel gets forgotten or undermined I think and I wanted to acknowledge it. Especially by S3, Rachel really fights for her friends and against whatever she believes is an injustice. This isn’t to say she’s always in the right with these behaviors or that she’s the best ally to everyone, just that these traits are here. Before Glee club she joined in a lot of advocacy clubs (some she really shouldn’t have been in, but it’s framed that way), she wanted to start a “Gay-Les-All” (The Gay-Lesbian-Alliance), and she regularly protests Mr. 👞, whether it’s by storming out of class or putting tape over her mouth in silent protest when she thinks he’s undermining her talent. In S1-2 it feels entitled most of the time, but I think it becomes a bit more selfless in S3, at least for a while, with her being very for Kurt during the student election, to the point where she stuffs the ballot box and gets suspended for it. Still not a good action, but with good, selfless intentions. She berates that one woman in S5 E19, which is still bad and misinformed of her, but it’s an example. She also stands up to her teacher when she didn’t like her “Oops I Did It Again” performance. And I think, while in the wrong, Rachel was just trying to stand up for herself against a teacher who bullied her a lot.

Difficulty “Fitting in”

This is Rachel’s entire story. Trying to find somewhere she felt she belonged. She wanted to be a part of something special to make her special. I believe this is a part of why she is obsessed with feeling like the best in the room. She was bullied and different from others so she felt very othered; maybe she tried to interpret this othered feeling as “I’m better, they just don’t realize” as a coping mechanism, but I think deep down she knew that wasn’t the case and everyone hated her for other reasons (some justifiable, some ableist if you say she’s neurodivergent) and she had to learn she could share the spotlight and shine along with people at her level. A very “Oh No!” By Marina (and the Diamonds)—“I feel like I’m the worse, so I always act like I’m the best” type deal. In S2 she begins to take down the pedestal she (and others) put herself on as a defense and become self aware and this continues into S3, then the cycle happens again in S4-5 where she starts putting herself up on that defense pedestal again, then takes herself down once more in S6 to her own rock bottom so she can be on healthy ground again by the flash forward and the end of the series. This isn’t perfectly done, but it’s done well enough where I can see that was the goal they might’ve been going for with her, and I appreciate that type of nonlinear character arc, it just wasn’t done well here. Like, not only was it nonlinear in story but also in writing quality and that’s where it’s faulty. Even when you take away all the neurodivergent framework—all the stuff about rituals, shutdown, et centra—this reading could still make sense for Rachel. She’s queen of the outcast who has to humble herself in order to thrive.

Thank you reading! I hope I was clear and coherent enough in this. If you have anymore points to make about this reading of Rachel let me know—I’d love to see!

#glee #rachel berry #neruodivergent #autism #autistic #actually autistic #asd #character analysis #character interpretation #autistic character interpretation #autistic interpretation #autistic coded character #autistic coded characters

[tuiyla]

so this is random, but it's bugged me for YEARS...do you have a theory as to why Santana doesn't retaliate when Rachel slaps her? ngl, it always just felt like the writers giving Lea a "badass" moment to me, but curious if you have a character-driven explanation for why this is basically the only time Santana doesn't hit back.

Tbh I think it's one of those cases where irl mattered more than the story? Like I'm sorry I can't help but feel like it just felt right for them to "give" that moment to Rachel and not have Santana retaliate. Damn I hate that slap so much haha hurts every part of me.

BUT as always, let's make this work on a story level. We know from Quinntana fights experience that Santana absolutely is the kind of gal to strike back immediately. At least with Quinn and in her fight with Lauren, she (in)famously doesn't think twice. And I could get into why Pezberry is different from Quinntana but I think a simpler explanation is that Santana's shocked. Forgive me for not rewatching the scene to verify, like I said it Hurts, but I think Santana's just a bit too shocked to slap Rachel back. It's not like the slap wasn't the inevitable crescendo of their fight and as Rachel is packing and Santana reaches the end of her rant, it's an entirely predictable climax. But I don't think Santana saw it coming. And, honestly? It shocks Rachel, too.

Santana is the kind of person who has more bark than bite and despite this, we saw her recklessly enter into physical fights before. I personally believe that Quinn would have wrecked her had Schue not shown up in 2x01 and Lauren left her with what I can only assume is a mild concussion. But they never get physical with Rachel except in PUC wanky even though there would have been opportunities to. I think that's because Rachel isn't the kind of person to initiate that and Santana always felt confident in her ability to win verbal fights against her. Rachel appreciates the drama of a good slap but she wouldn't hand one out unless she's really, really pissed off. It took Funny Girl for Rachel to be really, really pissed off at Santana. I think Santana expected a verbal throwdown and even got overconfident and thought she was winning as she said the final words of "you are short, you are awful, and that's never gonna change." She fully thought she'd have the last word and leave Rachel flabbergasted. Santana knows people and thought, after years of bullying, that there was nothing she could say to Rachel to elicit a reaction as visceral as that slap.

And yet.

So I think if we follow that logic, we can see why Santana's brain switched to freeze instead of fight. And then she gets the call about her audition and nothing was ever the same again. I actually really like the interpretation that @amazonworrier has of the slap in Crash World. No spoilers no spoilers, but the slap is framed as the exact turning point in the Pezberry relationship and I find that interesting. Their Rubicon. Mind, I'm one of those delusional people who think Pezberry could and did salvage their friendship after the slap but I think it's hard to deny that it did cause a shift. Because it was just that shocking.

I know this isn't the most satisfying answer as it is a very dissatisfying scene, if you ask me, but I think it sort of works. We'd expect Santana to slap Rachel back without thinking but the action itself threw her off so much that there was no time to even do that. Because then Rachel tells her to move out, then she gets the understudy gig and that's that. Alea iacta est.

#total side note but i've seen people be HAPPY #that rachel slapped santana #and to them i say fuck off <3 #anon #pezberry asks #the girlies are fightiiiiiiiiing #pezberry feud #glee asks

[myladyofmercy]

I got tagged by @tessabennet to do a

8 shows to get to know me

list and she did it as a kind of watch history and I loved that method so I am copying it

1. h2o: just add water

this show defined my childhood. i was obsessed. i remember only being allowed to watch the rewatches on saturday mornings but not the premieres that came mondays through thursdays. when s3 came around my parents allowed me to record the episodes on vhs and then watch the episode the next day. when the finale aired i had a friend come over after school the next day and we watched the last two episodes even tho she already watched them the night before. in the scene where lewis walks down the stairs in slow mo she pulled out her flip phone and recorded the scene because she thought he looked so cute.

also rikki made me gay and i was always her when we played mermaids in the pool.

2. glee

my first big teenage obsession. i think i started watching when season 2 was airing. the last two seasons took so fucking long to come out dubbed that it was the first time i streamed an episode right after it aired in the us even tho my english wasn't that good yet. i also got my mom and my aunt to watch it. my aunts favorite was finn and when i read that cory had died i called her right before bed to tell her and she told me later she couldn't sleep that night.

my favorite characters were quinn and kurt. quinn made me gay(er)

also i wasn't in fandom spaces back then so i managed to escape all the crazy shit that went on in the fandom back then but i have met some new friends recently who were in it and told me some horror stories and i really feel like I dodged a bullet.

3. gossip girl

i only watched this show after it aired but it's so messy and a definite guily pleasure.

also unpopular opinion but my favorite character was jenny (i am also obsessed with her band and their music and covered two of their songs in my school rockband)

4. the originals

i always preferred the originals over the vampire diaries because i just liked klaus and the other mikaelsons more than elena and co. i also became obsessed with the soundtrack of the show and used to listen to the tracks on youtube and would then convert my faves. that's how i discovered my love for ruelle.

5. shameless

another big obsession I discovered between s4 and s5 airing. i remember crying real tears when ian and mickey broke up in s5. i think gallavich was the first pairing i watched fanedits on youtube for and also how i discovered twenty one pilots and my ultimate beloved florence and the machine. i also had a fan account on instagram at one point that got some likes from emma kenney.

6. supernatural

oh supernatural.

i discovered the show at a very low point in my life and bingewatched 10 seasons back to back while staying home from school. destiel was the first ship i ever read fic for (twist and shout anyone?) and even tho this show went on for wayyyy to long and made some very questionable choices it still has a place in my heart.

7. 911

at this point in time this show is probably my biggest obsession right now (probably because a new season is airing right now) i saw gifs of buck and abby on tumblr when the first season was airing in 2018 but only started watching when the spin off started and i rediscovered it via tumblr during s3. i have done multiple rewatches at this point and this show can truly make you laugh, cry, look away in disgust and believe in humanity at the same time.

also either buddie is the best slow burn of all time or the biggest queerbait since destiel and i am down for the ride.

8. young royals

where do i even begin with this show. it showed up on tumblr in july of 2021 and then i watched it the second weekend of the month and my life changed. since then i have started being truly active on tumblr, creating content myself, reading fanfic earnestly and by some great writers who i can call friends now, learning swedish (even tho the bird scares me), found a bunch of friends from all over the world and flew to fucking canada all on my own to visit people i met through this show. like what the fuck. even tho my obsession is a bit dormant right now they have just started filming the third and last season and as the amount of content will grow my obsession will too. i know it.

-

okay so this was a fucking essay but i really enjoyed this little deep dive into my watch history and even tho i don't expect anyone to do this I'm gonna tag some of my lovely friends (who i may or may not have found through that small swedish show at 8.)

@tooindecisivetopickaurl @i-love-semicolons @prince-simon @angelbabysimon @cloudywilmon @royalwilmon @oatmilkovich @ungaroyals @aro-of-artemis @little---versailles @cantputitintowords

[albatris]

I have Missed blorbo blursday and I don't wanna overwhelm u with asks, but also,,,, if you are up for it,,,, may we get some facts about Riley?? Because Riley seems very cute and nice,,

I also have a tune for you! I recently discovered the song Tangerine by Nolune and it's a Very Good Tune. Makes me a little emotional in a good way

ooh, hello, I'm very late but thank you for the ask!! :D

first of all, WHAT a good tune omg..... just lovely.... gorgeous song <3 thank you for sending it, it makes me emotional too :'))

and uhhhhh yeah, Riley! Riley is good, lots of love for Riley over here, I like her a lot hehe. she is indeed very cute and nice!!

Riley lives in one of the apartments across the hall from Nat and she's a fellow vamp, and was turned about six years ago :3 she was turned voluntarily but I haven't pinned down exactly why yet, though I have my suspicions...... she regrets it, but tries not to dwell on it too much

she's the first friend Nat makes without Quinn's help! for her first appearance in the story, she senses the presence of A Vampire in Nat's apartment and knows Nat is a weird paranoid hermit who, to her knowledge, has never had a single person over to his apartment in the three years he's lived there....... so naturally she assumes some vampire has gotten inside somehow and is going to eat her weird neighbour lmao

she very anxiously attempts to break in and save him, and they have an extremely awkward spiderman meme moment at the door where she's like "are you ok do you need help??????" and he's like "dude what?? I was just taking a nap??? I'm fine???" then they both have the Oh I'm Staring At Another Vampire realisation at the same time

anyway, ye, Riley is very cool....... a popular gal who makes a good first impression.... polite and friendly but with a big ol' mischievous streak....

she loves bright colours and clashing patterns and zany makeup, her fashion tends to be very eccentric and bold and she gets a lot of compliments on it, that and her signature multicoloured hair, which changes frequently c:

she loves dramatic soap operas and old horror movies. she's a bit of a vampire film buff and has a running ranked list of which are the most accurate. she personally has a fondness for the really horrible monstrous scary vamp films, in a sort of jokingly self-deprecating "haha look it's me!" sort of way :c

she doesn't have a fatal sunlight allergy the same way Alex does, but still gets nasty burns and blisters pretty quick so she's mostly nocturnal too. she works as a tour guide for haunted locations and does ghost tours, basically! she also often writes about ghosts and the paranormal for little magazines or online journals.... she and Shara from ATDAO would get along so well. ghost time!

she's great with kids because she's basically a big chaotic kid herself, and great with adults because she's good at pretending she's not just a big chaotic kid xD she's bubbly and mischievous and loves a bit of good-natured chaos. she's a prankster and often takes Nat for a bit of a ride, seeing what ways she can mess with him or what silly things she can make him believe...... mostly because he's a very very very new vampire and doesn't know left from right yet lmao. but it's all in good fun :3 she's a big sweetheart and loves to fuss over her friends (of which she has a LOT)

in terms of vampiric activity, she just hangs out at shady bars and eats creeps. extremely valid. bigoted dirtbags talking a little too loudly, people slipping things in other people's drinks, dudes who get too handsy without consent or follow people home. eat more creeps 2k22. she's not always particularly subtle and quite a few humans who are familiar with her turn a blind eye when some unpleasant bastard mysteriously goes missing lmao

she knows about Quinn's reputation and has made a point to stay as far away from them as possible, n she's extremely worried about Nat being involved with them....... she doesn't want him to be taken advantage of :< she's quite terrified of Quinn and wants him to be safe! she's part of the reason Nat stops letting Quinn push him around so much, her care and encouragement definitely have a big impact on him

though Riley has a very bubbly and cheery personality, she's super fuckin depressed and extremely high anxiety all day every day. she was already an anxious human and vampirism aka "If You Didn't Have An Anxiety Disorder Before, You Do Now!" disease of course exacerbated this...... she's less prone to paranoia than most other vampires, though, probably due to her open and trusting temperament as a human

mmmm one final fun fact about Riley is that...... I always imagine she and Yvonne would get along SO well! I think Yvonne would be fascinated by Riley tbh, for...... reasons :3 well, for reasons thematically related to Yvonne's character arc, but that I won't go into here because they're still simmering in my brain and not ready to be rambled about yet!

so in my head, although Yvonne and Riley don't actually have much of a chance to get to know each other, I always think under different circumstances they could have been very good friends..... we can throw Zeke into the mix for some fun too :D

in terms of shipping with the rental car gang I'm always just like "idk just do whatever!" and Riley/Yvonne is such a good one..... have considered writing aus where [REDACTED] doesn't happen and the two get a chance to become close..... Riley/Yvonne/Zeke love triangle also has fun potential hahaha

chaotic vampire + chaotic human + chaotic vampire hunter. perfect. chefs kiss

or more likely both the chaotic vampire and chaotic vampire hunter think the human object of their affections is just some ordinary sweet normal girl and she turns out to be ten times more chaotic than both of them fjdjdks

anyway. yeah! :D

#a rental car takes a left down rake street and disappears #this is such a disjointed ramble sdgsgjlsk #riley!!!!!! best girl #romance tw #(just a lil)

[phoenixlionme]

If you disagree with me, fine. But do not insult me in any shape or form. You want your opinions respected, then respect mine.

I wanted to give my personal two cents on both sides of the argument regarding the whole "woke" media. Personally, I feel both sides take it too far. And below I will give my reasons. But first I want to educate that the term "woke" was coined by the Black community to have other people in said community be aware of social injustices; it was supposed to be about vigilance. And somehow it got turned into an insult (mainly by the more conservative groups, even politicians), with many not being able to define it and thinking it's the end of all humanity. Look, humans have more important and urgent things to deal with than stupid culture wars and it be nice if said politicians got that but they don't. And that's the end of that, now I will begin my thoughts.

Anti: Just because something has diversity in it doesn't mean it's "woke". And (like I stated in the above paragraph) I don't think you can even honestly define it. Most people in these groups take things out of context in some moments to make your point. And I strongly believe that it's just performative outrage meant to get clicks so you can get money. You get bent out of shape if you see very brief political stuff (i.e., BLM) if that said stuff is opposite to your liking. You claim not to be bigoted but your content is mainly dragging down or outage porn over women, minorities, and the LGBT. You call the other side sensitive but look at your actions. Not to mention, you cherrypick any shows/movies that did fail with this "woke" content in order to provide "evidence". Getting some type of sick glee at watching it fail. You make some valid critiques over the problems with race bending and gender swapping but proceed to attack the creators and actors for essentially a fictional piece of work. Also, quit being an asshole to someone who genuinely states how seeing someone on screen who looks like them made them feel seen; it's not about them saying they relate to someone only because of surface level feature. It's about seeing someone who is like them in some way (race, sexuality, gender, etc.) who isn't made into a joke, criminal, sacrificial lamb, or diversity checklist. They are happy to see someone who looks like them in a role that they often don't see them in, and are written with respect and nuance. You don't get it, fine but don't be an asshole.

Pro: Diversity can't be the ONLY reason to watch a show and/or movie. There has to be good storytelling, characterization, plot, pacing, etc. to draw the audience in. Also, raceswaps and genderbends are (in my opinion) not great diversity examples. While I won't mind a few selections it's mainly for the former and still very limited. People of underrepresented groups should get original stories. And while it's okay to discuss social injustices in the work, you gotta do your research on it and not just hearsay from Twitter. You have to be careful and thorough thought into these moments and let it happen organically. And bragging to audiences about how inclusive you are makes you look performative especially when you start canceling actual good shows with great diversity. Also if you want to empower certain groups then given them actual stories from a variety of genres where they are fleshed out and given a personality. If they just show up mention their sexuality, race, and/or gender in some way with nothing else about them as a character it comes across as pandering.

Middle: Diversity and good stories EXIST. The Owl House, Arcane, Carmen Sandiego 2019, The Old Guard, Disney's original Mulan, Black Panther, ATLA/TLOK, Never Have I Ever,Everything Everywhere All At Once, Power Rangers, Steven Universe, The Dragon Prince, Star Trek, Harley Quinn TV series, Into the Spiderverse, Craig of the Creek, Dead End Paranormal Park, Brooklyn 99, Love Simon/Love Victor, Amphibia, Captain Planet, Dreamwork's She-Ra, Fullmetal Alchemsist, Paper Girls, Moana, DuckTales 2017, etc. They aren't mutually exclusive.

To summarize: Good storytelling can have diverse casts, people from underrepresented groups should get original stories instead of rehashed movies/series, fans are free to critique artwork and can offer valid criticisms but there are some "fans" who will behind the term "woke" to hide how they genuinely don't like a story simply because of their own bigotry (and might be profiting off of outrage porn). Everyone's entitled to their opinion but no entitled to be bullying, mean-spirited assholes.

#fandom critical #truth bomb #representation matters #my posts #personal rant #mymedia

[forestlingincorporated]

I am thinking about Harley Quinn

Specifically, about where she fits in Jason Todd’s death. 

Harley is a bit of a fandom problem (and an adaptation and remake and reboot problem) because she’s an import character - she was invented for the animated series, and brought into comics later, not the other way around. 

This means in Harley’s original backstory, she became a Joker henchwoman when Dick was Robin - an older Robin, about 18 maybe, but dick was still in the green booties... or, not, given they used Tim’s costume design, but the point stands. 

However, Harley’s comic book origins are in the No Man’s Land arc. The backstory is similar, but it’s much later in the Batman timeline. Dick’s Nightwing, Jason’s already dead, and Tim is Robin. 

And I find that notable and compelling. There’s a habit to default to the animated series timeline and retroactively make Harley have been there with the Joker almost from the beginning, but it’s interesting to me to have Harley be a later addition. Joker has a history with Batman, and a history with the Robins, but Harley has only ever known Tim as Robin - maybe she knew OF Dick and Jason as Robins back when she was a civilian, but she has never faced them as a villain. 

In the animated series, Joker and Harley torture Tim - B:TAS’s Tim Drake/Jason Todd composite character - into becoming a little “Joker Jr.” They don’t kill him. I think that’s an important distinction to make, because creating a clown son for her and her puddin’ is the kind of messed up Harley was, but I don’t believe Harley would be down for child murder. It’s really difficult to insert Harley into the era of Jason’s death, because ultimately she’s a maternal person. Hell, all of the Sirens are, to differing degrees.

Selina’s got a soft spot for kids, but doesn’t seem to want any and doesn’t think she’d be a good mother, but it’s been shown that she could potentially come around to the idea.

Ivy is a bit hard to pin down as a character. She’s generally misanthropic, but she’s sometimes depicted as having a traumatic childhood, and empathizes with traumatized children, and she more-or-less adopted sixteen kids during No Man’s Land (and we make fun of Bruce for collecting kids) 

Harley herself seems to want to be a mom, though depictions of a more mature Harley tend to recognize that might not be the best idea at this time in her life, or at least that it’s too dangerous with Joker around. Regardless, she’s often depicted as somewhat protective of kids.

That doesn’t mesh with Harley being around when Jason died. Or... even knowing about it. 

I think there are interesting stories to be told keeping Harley on this later timeline - with Tim as “her” Robin, with her possibly not knowing what Joker did to the last Robin or even that he died, with Joker’s obsession with Batman and his rejection of Bruce’s children. I don’t “ship” BatJokes, but I definitely see a sort of twisted romantic one-sided obsession from Joker, where he sees Bruce as kind of his destiny? In a nemesis sort of way? Like, he perceives him as a soulmate, but with Hate. And he does talk about the Robins like he and Batman are spouses and the Robins are kids he never wanted, and I find it interesting that Harley comes along after he killed their “child” and Bruce turned around a got another one. 

I think there’s something interesting there, that Joker got himself his own sidekick, and a romantic partner no less. Like, maybe his goal in taking on Harley was to... “hurt” Bruce, the way he felt “hurt” by not being the most important person in Bruce’s life. 

Of course Bruce doesn’t give a shit who Joker’s teaming up or hooking up with, and the franchise itself has played with this concept before, but I’m not sure it’s fully analyzed what Harley’s role in it is. Harley’s not just someone Joker manipulated; she could very well be someone he manipulated specifically as a retaliation against a perceived slight... from Batman. 

...I think... I think that I think Joker views Harley as The Other Woman, The Mistress, and sees Batman as the ex-wife who just won’t stop living their best life without him, that he either wants back or to burn to the ground. 

But that context only really exist if Harley is a late addition, as she was in New Earth. The motivations don’t read the same if she comes along much earlier, but then you have to wrestle with the whole killing Jason thing and her reaction to that. 

Idk, I don’t think I have a point, just some food for thought. A nice jungle juice of barely connected concepts. I hope you got something out of this stream of consciousness. 

#harley quinn #joker #batman #jason todd #tim drake #jarley #batjokes

[korra-the-red-lion]

The Arrowverse and WB: Interference is Common.

On November 9th, the CW’s Supergirl came to an end. Many fans, myself included, were saddened that Kara and Lena didn’t end up together in a romantic relationship at the series end. Although the chances were slim to none, many of us were hoping for a Korrasami style ending at the very least. Instead, the queerbaiting of Supercorp is one of the show’s lasting legacies. But why? What was there to lose in the show’s final season? A recent interview from Jay Faerber (linked here) had some interesting answers. Two that caught my ear were that there was a lot of support for Supercorp from a lot of the writers and showrunners, and that each season the crew received a package that detailed which comic characters they could use if they choose to do so. WB always had their fingers in the pie, so to speak. Faerber even makes a point of mentioning that they had to go upstairs to allow for Melissa Benoist to get a haircut or have pants.

So why mention all this? I believe that WB was the one who blocked Supercorp from happening. Perhaps the CW holds some of the blame, which I wouldn’t hold it past them. However, as I will soon discuss, WB has interfered with the Arrowverse several times in the past.

Arrow

Arrow had multiple instances where WB interfered with the storytelling of the show. The major one? The destruction of the Suicide Squad:

One of the most promising storylines from Arrow was the beginning of the Suicide Squad. Slowly building up in season 2, it seemed like this was going to be a major aspect of the show, if not it’s own spin-off. There was even a Harley Quinn tease. But then...they killed Deadshot. And Waller. WHAT?

This is because Suicide Squad by David Ayer was in production and WB didn’t want people to be confused as to why there was two versions of the characters, because they must assume that their audiences are stupid. Regardless, that was the end of that storyline. Willa Holland admitted that she and others thought the decision was frustrating, but there was nothing that they could do.

The next major interference was the disappearance of Slade ‘Deathstroke’ Wilson. Fans of this character, who is still highly regarded as one of the best villains of the entire Arrowverse, were very confused when he all but disappeared from the show until season 5 brought him back, with season 6 wrapping up his story for good.. But why? Because of Justice League was in production.

Thus, the show lost one of the most dynamic characters because WB wanted to focus on this version of Deathstroke...which went absolutely no where. Great choice WB, great choice.

So two major villain/anti-hero storylines from the show were forced to stop because the WB wanted to focus on the DCEU. But what was the other major one?

The introduction of Ray Palmer into the Arrowverse. Remember how Arrow spent several episodes mentioning Kord Industries, hinting at the introduction of Ted Kord, better known as the Blue Beetle? If you do, do you also remember being shocked that Ray Palmer was brought on instead? Me too. This is because Brandon was originally brought on to play Ted Kord, but last minute studio interference forced the writers to use Ray ‘the Atom’ Palmer instead. No one outside the studio really knows why the change was made, but it was. Ray became a fan favourite, so it worked out in the end but what made them decide to make the change? Since then, there has been very little mention of Kord.

There are some other, more minor moments of interference from the studio. Until Batwoman was introduced to the universe, there had been a no Bruce name drop rule at all times. Also, the Bird of Prey were not to be used for the longest time due to the ban on Barbara Gordon, despite the introduction of the sympathetic Huntress and Black Canary.

Smallville, despite being one of the most popular DC properties, had its limitations from WB as well. Despite the use of popular DC characters such as Oliver Queen, Arthur Curry, and Dinah Lance, the Smallvile crew was barred from using two characters in particular:

Bruce Wayne and Diana Prince.

Most likely in case they chose to do shows based off of these two, but regardless, Batman and Wonder Woman were not allowed to be mentioned on the show directly, nor where they allowed to be brought on. This carried over to the Arrowverse until Batwoman came to light. Batman himself really hasn’t appeared in the show, but a fake Bruce and a real Bruce has. Wonder Woman has been mentioned but that’s it.

Supergirl

Supergirl has had some interference as well. In the first season of the show, Clark was never allowed to appear on screen fully. That did change in season 2, when Tyler Hoechlin was casted as Clark Kent. However, his character had special limitations put in place. He was only allowed to appear for a certain amount episodes in season 2. After that, he was very limited in the amount of appearances he could have.

Lex Luthor was not allowed to really be mentioned fully until season 4, when he was introduced to the show. Despite the Luthor family being on the show, they could not use the name of DC’s most well known villain. I am unsure of the reason behind this, but it was noticeable.

As previously mentioned, but Benoist was not allowed to change her physical appearance unless otherwise approved due to her look being specific to Kara. She had been asking for pants for her super suit for quite awhile prior to its introduction in season 5. Vancouver gets chilly y’all, yet she had to fight for something warmer and less revealing. And don’t get me wrong, I loved the iconic Supergirl look, but I also want the people playing them to be comfortable.

Conclusion

These characters are all intellectual properties. Understandably, there are many hoops to go through to use them in the first place. However, there shouldn’t be last minute changes or out right refusals from WB once someone gets the okay to do something.

It is on the showrunners and writers to make this clear, however. If Supercorp was blocked from WB, I wouldn’t be surprised. And I’ll point out there is a difference between fun easter eggs vs. dropped storylines and characters. The examples I used are the ones where the interference is the reason for these things disappearing without much explanation.

Who knows, maybe the CW was the one who said no. But, I just can’t see a network choosing to lose the viewers and to lose the money that they can make from the show (DVD/Blu-Ray sales, viewership numbers, con appearances) over making their most popular ship canon. From a business standpoint, I can’t wrapped my head around it. We will most likely never know the real reason why, but since the WB has proven itself as the big bully on the playground at times, this is why I believe they are the ones who put their foot down on it.

And that’s disappointing.

#arrowverse #arrow #supergirl #smallville #wb #warner bros #the cw #studio interference #supercorp fandom #supercorp #deathstroke #slade wilson #suicide squad #ted kord #ray palmer

[pigeonp0st]

Hi!! Can you possibly write a head cannon where y/n is kurts twin and is dating Quinn? Sorry if this isn’t specific any storyline is ok.

Quinn Fabray x Reader #3

Words: 2,024

Warnings: Mention of Car Crash, Hospital

Notes:

I was reading a story that involved a car crash and just...sort of took inspiration from that for more direction. I hope this is what you were looking for, thank you for requesting (and sorry for spelling mistakes)

———

You got into a car crash.

It wasn’t really your fault, it’s not as if you could have known that some dude driving a truck wanted to push you off a cliff…well, you’re sure he didn’t exactly want to; but that’s not the point, you think.

The point is that you got into a car crash. A car crash (or truck crashing, really) that you should have died from, but you didn’t. A car crash that should have presented lifetime injuries, but it didn’t.

And you’re lucky. That’s the magic word that keeps going around. You’re lucky.

Yeah, fuck that.

You don’t feel very lucky, laying down in your hospital bed and feeling so much pain everywhere, laying down in your hospital bed and not even being able to go to the bathroom by yourself... this doesn’t feel lucky. This feels miserable and shitty and—

Quinn. Quinn is here.

Quinn is sitting in the corner of the hospital room, reading a book with red rimmed eyes and shaky hands.

Quinn she— she wasn’t here yesterday. You wonder for a moment how she could have found out, and then you realize…

Kurt.

Kurt went to school today. You figure he must have relayed the news to the Glee club. If you had been awake yesterday, or even the day before—the night you got into the crash—you would have told him not to tell her.

Quinn doesn’t deserve to find out about this the way she probably found out about this. Quinn doesn’t deserve the worry she’s probably feeling...you know it would have been better for you to text her yourself so she knew immediately that you were fine. So you would be able to downplay the injuries.

Kurt likes being dramatic, and Quinn likes to panic.

“Quinn, you can’t be here,” you rasp out, your throat dry from lack of use. Her green eyes immediately snap up towards you.

“Y/N,” Quinn breathes out, voice full of relief as she sets her book down and moves towards the side of your bed to cup your cheek. “They said you woke up earlier but I had to see it to believe it.”

You give her a weak smile, not able to resist nuzzling your face into her hands. Her eyes watering with more tears almost makes you regret it. “Baby,” you whisper, “Kurt...my dad...what if they see? Where are they?”

Quinn’s face morphs into something guilty and apprehensive. “They both... sort of know about our relationship now…” she rushes to continue when she sees your wide eyes, “they were shocked, but they seem to be doing fine with the news.”

You blink at her, once, twice, and then drop your eyes closed with a wince. “Kurt’s gonna bother me so much about this,” you mumble. “How did they find out?”

You feel Quinn tense before you manage to open your eyes to see it.

“Me yelling at the nice lady up front to let me see my girlfriend probably told them as much,” Quinn says slowly, as if she expects an angry reaction. You don’t feel much anger. You haven’t really cared about them knowing for a while now…

In the beginning it just made sense to keep it a secret from them. Now, not so much.

Plus, nearly dying put some things into perspective for you.

“Does Finn know?”

Now it’s Quinn’s turn to wince. “I’m not sure,” she admits quietly, then adds, “i’m sorry if i’ve made things awkward for you.”

You can’t help but laugh at that, a laugh that turns into a coughing fit, and then turns into a whole bunch of growling while you grit your teeth in pain. “Fuck, fuck, that really hurt.”

Quinn’s hand is trembling again. “Do you want me to get the doctors?” She asks, with no small amount of panic. She’s terrified, and has been terrified since the moment Kurt told her you were in an accident.

“No, no, it’s fine,” you assure her, ignoring the pull of stitches that feel like they’re everywhere, and the hurt in your ribs. “I’m sure Finn will get over it eventually, when he finds out.”

“It’s not as if you two were siblings when I dated him,” Quinn jokes, though her eyebrows are furrowed with her worry.

You give her a smile that you hope is reassuring and try to relax into the hospital bed. Your eyes are heavy with tiredness, and you feel extremely drugged (yet at the same time not drugged enough), but you want to stay awake for Quinn.

Quinn has other plans.

She kisses your forehead, then promises against the skin there, “i’ll be here when you wake up.”

And right before you drift off into the dream world, you hear her say; “please don’t do this to me again,” in a voice that’s so weak and scared that you want to open your eyes again and reassure her.

You fall asleep instead.

——-

Quinn is there when you wake up again, but so is Kurt.

They’re talking. About you, you realize bitterly. About the crash, and the physical therapy you’re going to need to go through for your shoulder.

They’re talking quietly, as if to not disturb you, and it’s weird hearing the two most important people in your life talk. Especially since you know that just a day ago Kurt was terrified of Quinn.

Maybe not terrified...he was intimidated. Everyone is of Quinn.

(Quinn admitted to you once that sometimes she thrives in their fear, and other times she just feels alone. She told you that she doesn’t want to hurt people anymore just because she’s hurting, and that she’s trying to make people comfortable around her again.

The intimidation used to be from fear, now it’s from awe, so you suppose her plan hasn’t really worked. People worship the ground she walks on.

You worship the ground she walks on.)

Quinn is more deep than you expected though, and more deep than you’re sure everyone else expects. She’s more funny, more smart, more self-deprecating, more hurt, more nerdy, more goofy—than you ever realized.

She’s just a person full of surprises.

“Y/N?”

You jump in the hospital bed in alarm, your side and shoulder aching in protest. Yep. Quinn is full of surprises.

“Are you okay?” Quinn asks, giving you a sad smile. “Sorry for shocking you.”

Kurt pokes his head over her shoulder (it’s weird seeing them so close), “you don’t look so good,” he points out, as if you hadn’t already figured that out. The glare you send him has him shrugging.

“I’m fine, babe.” You ignore Kurt’s smirk at the nickname. “Could one of you just ask the doctors for about twenty pills for the pain?”

“And a hairbrush,” Kurt jokes, though his eyes are lined with the worry he thinks he’s hiding well, “got it.”

“You try getting pushed off a small cliff by a truck, see how you look afterwards!” You yell at Kurt’s retreating back.

There’s a tense silence the second Kurt is out of the room. Quinn’s eyes are focused on a spot on the hospital sheets, and she doesn’t look at you, even as she tries to make a joke for some levity;

“Twenty pills is a definite overdose. I hope Kurt isn’t actually asking for that amount.”

You snort, shaking your head. “They wouldn’t give it to him even if he asked.” Then, quietly, you ask; “Quinn, are you alright?”

She shakes her head. “You almost died,” Quinn mumbles, and she says it like an explanation, you suppose it is one.

It was terrifying, those moments when the truck hit, and those long moments after when you were still conscious.

“I keep thinking about what would have happened if you weren’t even a bit as lucky as you were,” she admits, closing her eyes. “You almost died. The only reason you're here now is because you were lucky.”

“Quinn—”

“You can’t die,” Quinn says, her eyes desperate when they snap open to look into yours. “You don’t get to leave me. That can’t be an option.”

But it is, because nothing is really guaranteed in life. Quinn knows this, has known this since a very young age, you imagine.

“I’m sorry,” is the only thing you can manage to say in the face of Quinn’s sadness.

Quinn seems to get a hold of herself after your apology. She just shakes her head and runs a hand through her hair and she’s Quinn again. “It’s not your fault. Just work hard at getting better soon so you can help me get through the school days.”

You nod, then hesitate. “Will you love me if I never drive again?” It’s meant to be a joke but it comes out more seriously than you intend. Quinn’s eyes immediately go soft and loving.

“Yes. I’d love you even if you didn’t even want to sit in a car again,” she says, and you believe her. You believe her.

“Then you’d have to walk everywhere with me,” you laugh, even as tears fall down your cheek. Quinn immediately bends down to kiss them away.

“The more calories burned, the more junk food I can have,” Quinn reassures, and you love her.

You love her so damn much.

——

Kurt is eyeing you and Quinn with something like wonderments in his eyes later that day.

Quinn can’t bring herself to care much though. What he thinks about her relationship with you in the least of her concerns right now. The only thing she really cares about right now is you.

She cares about you looking at her the way you’re looking at her right now, with a dopey drug induced smile. She cares about the fact that you’re looking at her at all. You’re looking at her right now because you’re alive.

You’re alive, Quinn reminds herself. The what if’s don’t matter.

“Quinn, will you marry me?” You ask, words slurred together. It brings Quinn straight out of her thoughts and into the real world.

She blinks at you for a couple of seconds and then nods uncertainty. You won’t remember this anyways, Quinn assures herself, but as she looks over her shoulder at Kurt’s wide eyes she realizes that he will.

Welp.

“One day,” Quinn continues, for appearance sake. Kurt snorts behind her.

She can’t be whipped enough for her girlfriend that she accepts a proposal this young. (She is though. She hates to admit that she’s incapable of saying no to a question like that from you, but it’s the truth.)

“I wanna get married now,” You protest, and Quinn doesn’t really know what to say to that.

“Y/N you can’t force the girl to marry you. Have some respect,” Kurt says, laughter in his voice. Quinn’s thankful for his intervention, though she won’t show it.

You pout at Kurt, and then at Quinn, “Fine. Just tell me when you’re ready, okay?” You ask, and Quinn loves desperately. She loves.

“Yeah. Okay.”

Not even Kurt’s rambling about ‘the disgustingness of love’ keeps her from the lightness in her chest at seeing you smile at her the way you are now.

You’re going to be okay.

The both of you will be, Quinn realizes, when Kurt cuts off his complaints to start planning for your wedding.

“We won’t be getting married for a while,” Quinn reminds the both of them. She gets blissfully ignored after a side glance from Kurt and another pout from you.

She’ll be okay, and even—Quinn realizes—Kurt will be. She wasn’t paying attention to how devastated he seemed earlier today, but in the face of his relief and happiness the differences between his behavior now seem obvious now.

He was devastated, but he’s okay now, because you’re awake. Quinn’s okay now because you're awake.

“Quinn, will you wear a suit for the wedding?” You ask, bringing Quinn out of her thoughts for probably the fifth time today.

Kurt snickers at Quinn’s resounding grimace, and his amusement only raises when Quinn mumbles, hesitantly, “we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.”

“That sounds like a no, dear sister.”

#quinn fabray x reader #glee x reader #glee imagine #x fem!reader #fem reader #quinn fabray imagine #quinn fabray #fanfic

[kim-monsterlings]

Eladan - M Orc x GN Human (Reader) // SFW

The pictures do not belong to me. I only created the mood board. Do not repost my work anywhere.

Content: SFW/Orange; surrounding a mute from birth reader and some mild self-depreciating thoughts of this, mild swearing, minor heartbreak, insecurities, drinking alcohol, light touching (hugging, stroking arms, tusks nuzzled to reader’s cheeks), very fluffy ending to make up for the heartache

Wordcount: 3067

Notes: Eladan was one of the first stories I wrote, but until “tropemas” I never finished him. There is a small follow up planned for Quinn the changeling, with info here, and a maybe NSFW for each Eladan and Vaia the cute minotaur. I hope you love them <3

“Tropemas” Summary: soulmate AU - the first words overheard by your soulmate are marked on your forearm, but they aren’t so nice

Masterlist // “Tropemas” Masterlist

Of all places, the words intended to shatter your heart came while you were working. The words so many others clutched tight and waited for, desperate to find their soulmates, left you wanting nothing more than to avoid them. Suffering with the harsh words marked into your forearm since you were young enough to remember had left you broken-hearted before the offence, and weak-kneed when it finally came.

Working in the tavern, no less. If only you could blame it on the alcohol, but the offending orc had only just begun to drink. Sat in a large booth beside a minotaur - neither of whom you'd ever seen before, but beside Quinn, an old fae friend of yours, a changeling. They'd yet to see you, and after freezing behind the bar, you weren't sure if you had the strength to near them.

The orc's pint had clattered against pierced tusks, the froth bubbling up to a thick, braided beard, before he scowled, almost shouting, "why should I waste my life on some soulmate?" The pint slammed back onto the table once more, emptied. "Fuck fate."

Fuck fate.

It hurt more then. The first sentence you were too familiar with - after years spent scrubbing at the words, hoping one day they would wash away like ink - but the following sentiment twisted your stomach into nausea. The tavern busied in your lapse, patrons flooding in with no concern to your pained smile as you served them.

Fuck fate.

Waste my life.

It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair for Quinn's soulmate brand to have delicate cursive, to almost whisper "take me", yet yours was harsh and unfeeling. So many times, you had considered marking it over, though artists refused. Altering a soulmate mark was immoral, no matter the price or bargain.

The orc quieted following his outburst. You wouldn't have been drawn closer if not for a call of your name - nickname, at least, with Quinn above all respecting the importance of names - and you were helpless to wandering closer.

Though this was the first night you had ever neared Quinn when out with strangers, the fae only leaned back and softened their dangerous, charming smile. Pierced and pointed tips of their ears appeared through plaited midnight hair as they turned closer. In the presence of strangers, too, they began signing in common, for which you were more than grateful for as the orc's attention swung to you.

"I wanted to say hi. Busy night?" From that, Quinn frowned. "You look tired."

"Tired," you repeated, and shrugged a little, Quinn mirroring with a small sigh. They were busy too, and you had to wonder why of all company, they chose to spend their night with an orc so horribly rude. Of course, you wouldn't outrightly say such a thing - yet. "New friends?"

"Old," they signed, before spelling, "Vaia." They tipped their chin to the almost honey coloured minotaur, and she smiled, her nose ring shifting, which left the orc to be, "Eladan. Only visiting. When do you finish?”

That cracked your mask a little. Quinn would often wait for you, to share a drink in the early morning before walking you home. Tonight, nothing sickened you more than the thought of time wasted in Eladan's company.

So, with your smile weakened, you returned, "tired." Quinn's bright eyes rolled. The excuse was well overused, but they didn't persist. "Have a drink on me."

Their touch brushed to your palm. Quinn kissed your knuckles and bid you goodnight, but only in turning did the angle of Eladan's stare strike you. He hardly feigned looking away from the loose sleeve at your wrist, and had it been any looser, the dark cruelty forever scarring you would have been legible.

The table waited hardly a minute after you left before whispering of you, but to your surprise the mumbled whisper of, "cannot speak," came from the minotaur, not orc. A weight of stares fell upon you where you stood, pretending to wipe down the bar. Vaia's deep voice carried, and though the question came as no surprise, the curiosity only served to benefit your soulmate. "How?"

"Born mute," Quinn said, and that was all.

When you looked back before passing into the kitchen, the orc had gripped his wrist tight.

Another server tended to their booth under your pleading. Most who worked in the tavern, and several customers, had been kind enough to learn some sign, or carry paper for you when needed. The night passed well, without any further heartbreaks, until Quinn's wave caught your eye.

They would be back late in the night for you so you only smiled back, smiling even to Vaia, and paid no mind to the orc yet to leave. But hidden only behind your hair now, his passing scrutiny struck harder. Was it now your shying away that earned a frown, his tusks twisted at his lips, or the refusal to turn away when he came to the bar, leaning on his forearms, that had his head tilting?

Suddenly, the colour of your outfit struck you. Something as simple as that burned in your chest and forced you to lift your head from your chest. The soft green of it matched the orc's mottled shadings near perfectly, and the irony twisted deep in your stomach.

"Pardon me," he said, in a voice so soft you almost forgot the words scarred onto you. "May I ask if your heart is spoken for?"

Why couldn't those be the words of love and affection so many had on their bodies? The pain from his attempt now to - what was he attempting? To seduce you or use you for his visit - bittered what little was left of your good mood. You left Eladan watching as you turned and walked away.

The close friendship you cherished with Quinn became your undoing. Where they went, two shadows trailed, and usually into the tavern. They hadn't specified how long the visit was, nor its purpose, and you couldn't help feeling rude asking after immediately being introduced.

Though you ought to have because Quinn thought it would be fun to introduce you all. Your refusals were ignored after desperately trying to think of an excuse, but your only excuse was work, and they could wait for you to finish. Quinn invited Vaia and Eladan to the markets, a day out usually reserved for only the two of you, and not a heart-breaking orc.

Vaia was quiet, but that was no different to how many were around you. Often afraid to speak for you couldn't, unable to really communicate but with a strained smile and nod, but the company was nice, at least, and when she began talking, drawing you to stalls when a soft fabric caught her eye, you found you didn't mind staying by her side and helping wrap the small scarf carefully by her horns, for more reason than company.

The orc never strayed far. More than often, he stood with Quinn, but his eyes flitted back to you. Vaia moved to catch up with Quinn and left you to yourself before you'd realised, and a quiet rumble of your name left you frozen in shock. He offered a small flower, dark petals and tiny in his hand, though somehow dwarfing yours. Eladan's lips rose as he stepped closer.

"Walk with me?"

Fuck fate, he had cursed, and you wanted to throw the flower, but he ducked his head and left you with an aching heart, as if already resigned to your refusal. The orc looked shrunken; shoulders fallen low as he looked back to where your friends had gone ahead without you.

"They mentioned lunch," he said then, eyes firmly on the flower twirling in your hand. "If you're hungry? Not at the tavern, that would be cruel to take you back when you are not working. Somewhere with warm food."

Cruel, and the word twisted your stomach. In an effort just to make him stop, you nodded, and Eladan's chest deflated on a rush of breath.

"We hunt when we travel. Vaia and I," he said quietly, after stealing looks in what you had hoped to be a companionable silence, walking close enough his arm brushed to yours; the arm marked by his words. "I miss proper meals. Isn't it hard working around warm food all the time? No, I… I suppose not," he mumbled when you only frowned, and his head lifted when, like a blessing, Quinn called out to you.

Eladan offered to order for you. The offer itself tightened your chest in a way you tried to fight off, immediately signing to Quinn and waiting far from the pair and by Vaia. With a nod to the jewellery now changed in her nose, she grinned and thanked you for the implied compliment. Standing beside her now had been easier before, when you didn't see the small frown on the orc's lips after you left him.

The other small tavern in your village was adjoined to an inn, less crowded and more welcoming to friends than a bar would be on a late evening. Eladan squeezed beside you in the booth not intended for so many, and Quinn sat opposite you, leaning into Vaia as you waited for drinks.

With all your heart, you tried to hate the evening. Forced close to your intended soulmate, his muscles thick and tense, it was impossible not to wonder at what could have been - what still might be, if you moved beyond the harsh words you'd grown up with.

He was travelling with Vaia looking for work. They helped people in need of protection as unofficial bodyguards. You believed that wholeheartedly, and even grinned when Vaia told a story of how she'd been the first of their company to beat Eladan in a fight, and the first to bruise his ego. If he'd caught his breath when you'd laughed, you smothered that to the back of your mind.

"If you ever want to travel," he murmured, lifting his pint up and glancing down, a small smile crinkling his eyes. "I'd love to take you. Have you travelled?"

You shook your head and sipped at your drink, which was a dangerous thing to do, now his rumbling voice had begun to sound pleasant, and the press of his thigh to yours was warm and welcomed. You couldn't pinpoint when you had stopped leaning away from him, either, his arm resting on the back of the booth behind you.

"Not many know sign. In the cities, it's... it's different, but the woods and the sea - I think you'd love it."

It wasn't the promise of the sights that made you soften and nod, but the promise of being near him, and you stiffened. By then, Vaia was already nearing the stairs up to the inn, and Eladan brushed his hand to yours in a way of goodnight before retiring, too.

That left you with a changeling who saw too much, who rose from the booth and offered an arm to hold you close. The night carried you both onward in a peaceful silence, until your home began to near. They stroked down your arms only to soften at your wrists, a flash of gold in their eyes disarming you.

"You have always been so vigilant in hiding it. The words," they whispered. "They are not kind, are they? They're… they're what he said. You overhead?"

Unable to sign with Quinn still holding you, only a sniff broke the silence. They waited for you to nod before brushing up your sleeve. Knowing the words did little to prepare for seeing them, for finding them thick and unwavering.

After an evening so pleasant by his side, they slammed a weight into you, knocking a pain which had fallen away over the course of the night, back to its place in your chest.

Why should I waste my life on some soulmate

"His arm is blank. I do not wish to overstep-" you couldn't help frowning, and Quinn laughed with you. "More so than already, but, look," they sighed. Hands gentle on yours, Quinn squeezed. "He thought there wasn't a soul out there for him. Eladan wants you."

You twisted free then, staggering back a step. "He may want a soulmate but he does not want me. He does not want some-" your fingers twisted and Quinn reached, whispering your name as you struggled to focus and sign through the rush of pain. "Some mute. He wants a soulmate, not me. Goodnight."

Quinn ducked their head and returned the sentiment, waiting until you were indoors before leaving. They didn't see you collapsed to your knees and tracing the words by heart, wishing as you had so many times before that things were different.

True to their word and for that you were beyond grateful, Quinn didn't overstep. No more outings as a group were encouraged and you threw yourself into work, spending the nights walking home and chatting with your friend, and only them, waiting until the two guests would finally pass on.

Maybe it was wrong to think so, but you didn't want him. Eladan wanted a soulmate too late. The words were always and would be scarred, stinging, a reminder of how for years you had anticipated it being in disgust at finding you mute. Whether that was so or not, whether it was a mistake, your heart had been burdened for a time long before he had tucked a flower to your ear and teased smiles to your lips, and he would be leaving soon.

Soon, but without any timeframe. It was below you to outrightly ignore him, even on the night he came into the tavern alone. Eladan's warm smile didn't meet his eyes when you left him nursing an almost untouched pint, and for once it was you looking over your shoulder to the lonely orc.

For a breath too long, your stare lingered, entranced by the muscles flexing as he shucked off a jacket, small beads in his beard clinking. The move was one so insignificant - simply removing his leathers, as many would - but he bared his wrists, his plain, empty wrists, like he wanted you to see.

Eladan's shadowed eyes fell from you to his wrist when you were drawn helplessly to the booth. "What I'm thinking," he began quietly, with his thumb rubbing in circles you had drawn time and time before, but where yours were an effort to scrub away words, his were to summon. "I think you already know, don't you?"

Unable to deny it, you did nothing but turn.

Tonight, Quinn wouldn't be there to accompany you home. Maybe it had been a set up - an overstep you doubted, but it didn't surprise you to find an orc the last patron left in the early hours of the closing tavern. Eladan left with his jacket over his shoulder and reached out to brush your hands together before leaving.

You couldn't find the strength to stay standing any longer. The churning in your stomach forced you out for fresh air, collapsing back into the wall for support when the first, long-suppressed sob tore from you.

It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair to be so heartbroken before ever learning who your soulmate was, and to now want to be with them, to learn them, yet feel the pain of their imprint lingering behind any soft smile or effort in carrying a conversation.

Nor was it fair to be completely unsurprised by the tentative call of your name from your soulmate, the very same who had waited for you, stumbling across you pressing a hand over your mouth and choking back cries.

Eladan's knuckles first brushed from your damp cheeks to skim along your throat. Gentle enough was his hold that you could lean into him and he trembled at the closer embrace, shifting to tuck you against his chest when a shudder wracked you.

"The first words you heard me say," he murmured. "Of all the things that night for you to hear, I think you heard the worst."

The tiny, indistinguishable hum that came from your throat earned a weak smile. Eladan nodded more to himself as he tucked his fingertips beneath your coat and bared your wrist, the words as dark and legible as always.

Why should I waste my life on some soulmate

"Fuck fate," he whispered then, the following words that had served only to worsen the wound. Eladan curled himself closer and nudged his tusks to your cheeks in a move as tender and intimate as you would allow.

For him to twist free from you and turn his head down came with a strike of shame. Had you so easily fooled yourself? To think that this warrior orc, one who spat harsh words and was only passing through, would want you of all people made you weaken and sniff, trying to lean away.

Eladan frowned, braids flicking beyond his shoulder. His fingertips pressed against your cheek to return your unfocused eyes to him, before his hand curled into a fist, arm folded across his chest, and he moved his fist in a slow circle.

"I'm sorry," he signed. The next attempt became so jittery, his movements rigid and nervous all at once, that you reached for his large hands and squeezed. He weakened again and brought your touch to brush against his tusks as he spoke aloud. "Those words were from anger. I thought I was the only soul not to have a match out there. I never thought… you," he breathed, and closed his eyes. Just this once, you told yourself, you would let him lean into you; you ignored that it had happened before, that you'd let him come close already. "I want you. I want to want you for you, for more than fate's hand, and if you would give me the chance - please, I," he caught himself then, his voice cracking. "Quinn is teaching me, um- I-" You couldn't help your smile when Eladan wriggled his fingers free to sign, "please. One chance."

"One," you returned, but it was enough for him to shudder and clutch you tight.

He fumbled behind your back enough for you to recognise hand movements, before he grunted, "thank you."

#exophilia #exophilia writing #exophilia fic #orc #orc boyfriend #monster boyfriend #orc x human #orc x reader #orc partner #orc romance #monster x human #monster x reader #soulmates #soulmate #soulmate au #mute reader #gender neutral reader #reader insert #kim-monsterlings writing #Eladan the orc #monster romance #tropemas #tropes #soulmate trope #gn reader #mute #sign language #2020 tropemas

[bleulone]

Can we talk about about how Colin looked in ep 1 when he first saw Marina compared to how he looked when he saw Pen in ep 8. Almost the exact same look! Of course his look to Penelope is probably more about his guilt because he brushed her off when she tried to warn him but still..progress! Lol and then when he's getting ready to leave for Greece, he glanced towards Penelope's home. I think they're having Colin's feelings for her grow gradually in the show instead of all of a sudden like in the books.

Hey! Thank you for this insightful ask of yours :) Sorry for the late answer, I took a long time to write this— without further ado, here we go!

Indeed, Polin is first and foremost a story of gazes, those gazes being of many natures. Whether they are love ones, friendly ones, admirative ones or lustful ones, looking imposes itself to be a huge parameter in Penelope and Colin’s love story.

In order to understand that on screen, film-making has at its disposal a very rich and smart langage of its own. Sometimes, comparision helps to underlines the differences between one character’s relationship with person A mirorring person B. I feel like Shondaland and Chris Van Dussen wanted to introduce the audience to the evolution of our Bridgerton men’s perception of Love. For instance, while Anthony views attachement— to Siena— as a way to escape his responsibilities before becoming his villain (...until our queen ma’am Kate Sheffield comes to the picture), Benedict doesn’t comprehend this universal concept and prefers to enjoy the many physical pleasures life can offer. In other words, the older brothers already explored their sexuality here and there, making them the infamous rakes that they are. As for Colin, it’s a complete other thing.

Colin is young. Very young. At 21, he’s just left Eton College and barely knows anything of the world nor women. Like Anthony said in 1x06, Colin hasn’t been taken to brothels which is a very important step in the building of young men’s sentimental and sexual education during that time period. Since he missed this essential step, our sweet/immature boy has no clue about how to deal sagaciously with his feelings and his “foolish” impulses, baring his naivety. At this point of the story, we can easily come to the conclusion that Colin is a virgin who can’t drive XD. He’s just a child overcame by his passions, a hopelessly romantic who rushes things without taking the time to properly court or know his significant other. And his off-screen flirtation with those supposed numerous girls in London isn’t of any help to justify his (oh so little) experience. So when he sees Marina, he’s so struck by her... mainly by her alluring appearance. And he doesn’t seem to let his eyes nor mind go beyond her exquisite beauty.

In this perspective, the whole Colin/Marina storyline can be perceived as a parallelism to the Pen/Colin’s one. In 1x01, he is immediatley smitten with a dancing Miss Thompson, which happens to be ironically the same case with a 17 year-old Pen but with him. We got to see her, a few moments ago, dreamily looking at him from the back of the dancefloor (echoeing the episode where she fell madly in love with him after he fell off his horse at Hyde Park). She’s charmed by his dashing look and his kindness, yet she doesn’t seem to know anything else about him considering the rare conversations they share. Her burning gaze fits the original story from Julia Quinn’s books because in Romancing Mister Bridgerton, the 28 year-old spinster Penelope do realize later on that Colin is more than a good looking man : he’s a human who possesses a temper and flaws.

Either way, both of our boos are portrayed as hopelessly young people in love who childishly idealize the objects of their affection.

In 1x08, it’s the other way around. It’s Colin who sees Pen first, her who appears to wear the yellow dress’ lookalike from the pilot—what an interesting call back ^^. With his mouth slightly agape and his eyes wide open, we can catch sight of the timid spark of a change in his gaze : Colin Bridgerton notices Penelope Featherington. He‘s touched by the realization that she cares about him. It would be rather inappropriate of me to say that Colin is already in love with her. However, in the finale, I do believe that he’s more struck by her high level of deep care for him than her beauty.

We are thus able to spot two big differences in Colin’s relationship with women in this season : when his attraction to Marina was purely physical and rushed, his attraction with Penelope is more emotional and slow. And for now, he comes to cherish his special bond with her, especially after she tried to warn him of the dangerous trap he was about to fall into. Even if he just sees her as his younger sister’s best friend right now, Pen matters in his life. And it’s still a little yet important progress for sure.

Speaking of which, I agree with you that this look of awe as well as realization is mostly mixed up with guilt. Since he didn’t take into account her words, he felt the strong need to apologize. But bear in mind that guilt formulates a considerable part in Colin’s feelings for Pen... and it’s only the very beginning. In the future, he’ll blame himself for not seeing her as the beautiful goddess and siren that she is in the first place. He’ll blame himself for not reciprocating the feelings for her.... Though at the moment, due to his lack of experience with women, Colin is oblivious to Pen’s obvious signs of sorrow when he told her he’s leaving for Greece/Cyprus. Next time, he’ll detect her sadness and won’t let her go, I’m sure of it (if he doesn’t I’ll riot).

Furthermore, I’m so glad you brought up the scene where Colin glances at the Featherington house. I had the same thought as well. When you put this still and the one where Pen is crying while looking at her window side by side, it even seems like they’re looking at each other. In a way, it implicitly confirms Pen’s key role in his final decision... After all, she’s the one who inadvertently inspired him right ?

The act of traveling has always been seen as cathartic since leaving home to discover yourself allows you to heal your broken heart and soul. It’s natural for Colin to do this. To make his first real steps into the world. His choice is quite relatable more than it is essential for his arc in the series. I can’t wait for him to come back all changed, hot ^^ and mature. I think, like you said, they are planning on making him progressively falling in love with her. Colin’s feelings will gradually leave the platonic zone to explore and officially stay in the intimate zone throughout the seasons.

Overall, the Colin/Marina and Colin/Penelope parallel in s1 mostly helps viewers to compare the way Colin evolves from being a stubborn naive boy to a heartbroken young man who’s aware of his crutial need for Experience. His coming of age, just like Pen’s, has just begun. And they will surely lead to our boy changing himself into the true charming rake that he’s meant to be and our girl into a more confident woman. Consequently, I think their story won’t take 10 years but rather at the very least 5 years perhaps to fit the TV timeline. Once Polin will finally be able to discuss, we’ll hopefully get to see more interesting nuances and shades added to the portrait they painted of one another over the years. They’re indispensable to the slow build up of their emotions/attraction as well as the shattering of their childish idealization/perception of each other.

All in all, I’m so loving the fact that season 1 beautifully sets up the importance of the gaze in Polin’s love story. This first installment is like an expository scene of a play. It leaves a trail of clues and pieces of information here and there at the reach every viewers who can pick them up and analyze what can be the main themes which will determine one character’s story arc/romance. With Polin we have : admiration, wit, love and friendship, desillusionment. (I know they are more but it’s all I can think of rn lol).

If we’re already emotional messes just with the mere power of them looking at each other, imagine when they’ll actually talk and share real conversations. It’s going to be a long way to canon but luv me some good fluffy angsty steamy slow burn :) ✨ I hope this long of mine answers your ask ahah, even if I talked about many things other than just Polin’s looks. Also, sorry if you spot some grammatical mistakes, English is not my first language.

#bleulone answers #anon #ask #meta and gush #polin #polin meta #colin x penelope #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #julia quinn #romancing mister bridgerton #bridgerton #shondaland #chris van dusen

[bbugyu]

daddy’s little monster + lee seokmin & yoon jeonghan

the story of your side hustle, that both pays well and had some very lovely benefits.

prelude | part one | part two | part three | epilogue

wc.5195 | SMUT, like DIRTY SMUT, threesome, sugar daddy!jeonghan and musician!seokmin, aka my worst nightmare, hard dom vs service sub vs service dom, aka my other worst nightmare, fem reader, daddy kink, marking, cream pie, please use condoms, lk cucking? happy halloween!

i was gonna say this is porn without plot but in reality idk how to not make smut way too personal. and i have not stopped thinking about my seokhan sandwicch fantasies and desperately needed to get it out, so take my shame and run with it. gif literally does not match this at all but DONT WORRY ABOUT IT

~

seokmin knew that jeonghan, the prolific and sought after architect whom he considered a close friend, had a less than conventional relationship with a young woman, but he had never met her. didn't know what the two did beyond appear at fancy industry dinner parties together, or the occasional sleepovers that had been offhandedly mentioned when seokmin and him get drinks and grilled meat. he believed she was real - he had been told she was real, by a mutual friend who had attended said parties - but had never seen a picture of her. never been introduced. he dropped architecture, afterall, deciding instead to get a teaching degree while jeonghan continued his artistic engineering. he had no reason to attend the parties that jeonghan paid her to accompany him to.

so when he was slightly drunk at a halloween party being held at the architect's beautiful home, he thought nothing about the pretty girl giving him attention, other than the fact that she looked incredible in her cheerleading outfit and that she was sitting far too close to him to not be flirting.

"how do you know jeonghan?" you asked, perched on the sofa next to seokmin, fingers mindlessly fiddling with the zipper on his red and blue bomber jacket.

his arm was over the back of the sofa, and you were comfortably sitting in the negative space, your feet tucked beneath your baby blue pleated skirt. "we went to college together," he said.

your eyebrow quirked. "are you also an architect? i've never seen you around."

he smiled and shook his head, wondering why a pretty girl like you was wasting your time getting to know a guy like him if you frequented industry parties. "no, i dropped the program. too much math. i'm a music teacher."

he watched your eyes light up. "what kind of music?"

"piano and guitar, mostly," he said, shifting beside you when your knees brushed over his thigh. "i do some vocal coaching, also."

you gazed at his profile as he looked anywhere but at you, eyes briefly focusing on the little black heart drawn under his eye. "you do have a lovely voice."

"thanks," he said, smiling when he turned to look at you, almost faltering when he realized you were leaning into him. "but you haven't heard me sing."

you paused, staring at his lips. "i'd like to," you breathed, and seokmin's hand dropped from the couch to find the small of your back, a shiver running up your spine when his fingers ran over the waistband of your skirt.

"y/n."

with great difficulty, you looked away from his lips to the source of your name being called, smiling lightly when you saw who had summoned you. you put a hand on seokmin's chest.

"i'll be right back, okay?" he kept watching your lips as you spoke. "promise me you won't go anywhere?"

seokmin gave you a lopsided smile, fingers brushing over your skin still. "promise."

you pulled yourself off the couch, purposefully giving him a bit of a view as you leaned over to slip your feet back into your sneakers, walking over to the man that had called your name. seokmin watched you swing your hips side to side, then cursed under his breath when jeonghan's hand snaked around your waist only a few meters in front of him, putting the pieces together in his mind.

"i see you like my friend," jeonghan muttered, handing you the drink you had asked him for. he was dressed as a man in black, which was wholly unoriginal considering he wore many suits regularly, but you figured your cheerleading costume wasn't leaving much more to the imagination than any of the dresses he usually picked out for you.

"you never told me you were friends with a musician," you teased. "afraid i wouldn't call you?"

he laughed, sneakily pulling up the hem of your skirt and watching over your shoulder as seokmin tried not to stare. "you'll always call me."

you bit at your lip, smiling. "yes, daddy."

"are you sure about him?"

you peeked over your shoulder, giggling when seokmin looked away from you and tugged at the knees of his black pleather pants. "isn't he perfect?"

"i like seokmin," jeonghan said, drawing your attention by taking off his sunglasses, hooking them in his lapel pocket. "he's one of my closest friends. i want you to be absolutely sure."

you paused, considering his tone and looking into his amber eyes. "i'm positive."

jeonghan smiled, pulling you into him for a quick kiss. "go tell him the good news, sweetheart."

you grinned, pulling away from him as he put his sunglasses back on and teasingly clicked his prop neuralizer at you. you giggled and sauntering back to the couch that seated the most adorable harley quinn you had ever seen.

"i'm back," you said, sipping at your drink as you settled back into seokmin's side. "sorry, you know how sugar daddies are. so demanding."

he choked out a laugh, still unsure despite your joking tone. "so, you and, uh, jeonghan-"

"yeah," you sighed, setting your drink down on the table beside the sofa and adjusting your posture, putting your knees on his thigh but keeping your shoes off the couch. "he likes my company, i like not paying for tuition."

"what are you studying?" seokmin asked, jumping at the opportunity to change the subject.

you smiled, tugging at his arm until he took the hint to put it back where it was before you were interrupted. "musical theory and recording arts."

he almost laughed. "you're unreal."

"i could say the same," you said, fingers fiddling with the opposite collar of his jacket. "can i ask you something? no pressure."

his eyebrows quirked upwards. "there's a little pressure."

you giggled, tugging at the collar lightly and smiling when he shifted to face you better. "genuinely, don't say yes just because i want you to, okay?" you only continued when he nodded, taking a deep breath. "so, jeonghan and i have been wanting to try something for a while, and he asked me to find someone tonight."

seokmin swallowed. "am i someone?"

you bit your lip. "yes."

his finger scratched at his cheek. "and he approves?"

your eyes flickered to where you and jeonghan had been standing, but the older was nowhere to be found. "yes."

"i-" he cleared his throat suddenly. "i just haven't- i don't know what i'm trying to say." he paused to collect himself. "i've never even considered doing anything like… that."

you giggled sweetly, and seokmin tried to not notice the way your hand ran over his chest. "i haven't done anything like this either," you assured him. "jeonghan's a little bossy, but he'll only be that way to me if you don't ask for it, i promise. and you don't have to do anything you're uncomfortable with, seriously, we can stop whenever, i just-" you bit at your lip briefly. "i just really want to make you feel good."

despite you telling him to not just say yes just for your sake, he had a hard time saying no after hearing your dark tone. any idea of saying no slipped his mind completely when you kissed him, slow and deliberate, your tongue tasting like cola and whiskey against his. he even went as far as pulling you into his lap, forgetting the context of the party surrounding him, his only thoughts about the way your thighs split over his lap and how soft your skin felt when his hands ran under your skirt.

"is this a yes?" you asked breathlessly, trying not to grind down on his pleather covered thighs.

he nodded at you with blown out eyes. "i'll try anything with you."

you grinned, finger brushing over the purposefully smeared lipstick across his cheek. "you're so cute."

he smiled at you, a hand running up your side as you leaned into him again. "not all the time," he muttered, and you couldn't help but gasp lightly when he bounced his leg under you. "want me to prove it?"

you kissed him again, unable to form any words to say yes but desperately needing to. when a hand landed on the back of your neck, you moaned into his mouth and pulled away, trying to catch your breath.

seokmin's hand pulled you into him again, and you whimpered lightly against his lips. "we need to go."

his lips barely left yours when he asked "where to?" and your fingers intertwined with his as you stood, pulling him off the couch to follow you.

you spotted jeonghan in the next room, and despite not knowing for sure if he noticed you two, you spun around playfully and pulled seokmin into you again, letting him kiss you deeply with his hands exploring your bare waist before you pulled away again to continue leading him away, the lopsided grin on his face never leaving.

the noise of the party dissipated as you pulled him up a flight of stairs and down a hall, stopping a few times to kiss against banisters in areas of jeonghan's home he had never been in.

"is this-" seokmin stopped himself as you closed the bedroom door, looking around at the grand but minimally decorated room - the main focal point being the large canopy bed against the far wall.

"jeonghan's," you said, pulling seokmin into you and resuming your feverish kisses. "it's the only bedroom i'm allowed in."

he briefly wondered what other rules the two of you had, but all but forgot about them when you were pushing his jacket off his shoulders, hands running over his chest. you tried to catch your breath as seokmin's mouth worked its way down your neck, but you couldn't stop whining.

"fuck, do you work out?" you asked breathlessly as he backed you up against the door, your hands not so subtly gripping at a bicep.

he chuckled against your neck. "i tune pianos, sometimes."

you briefly thought about him moving an upright to access the strings, and how you had to recruit the help of three friends to move the one jeonghan had bought for you. "you should come to my place, i've been meaning to get mine tuned for a while."

"you can just say you want to see me again," he said, a teasing smile on his lips as he pulled you off the door.

"you're sure about this, right?" you asked between kisses. "he'll notice we're missing and come looking. i don't want you to be surprised."

seokmin considered the concept of jeonghan walking in on his friend between your thighs, laid out on his bed, and the way his length flinched in his pants assured you that it was the best idea he had heard in a while. "i'm sure, i promise."

you bit at your lip again as you grinned, letting him overtake you with kisses as the back of your legs hit the bed.

"this little skirt, i swear to god," seokmin groaned, large hands squeezing at your ass through the fabric.

you gasped, your open mouth making seokmin groan deeper as he pulled you against his tented crotch. "jeonghan picked it out."

"i can tell," he said, staring down at the supposed team name you were meant to be cheering for. "angel, huh? does he call you that?"

"sometimes," you breathed, lips nipping at his neck. "he calls me the name on your chest more, though."

seokmin chuckled, almost completely forgetting about his own costume that he had mostly only picked because the shirt was so easy to find. he brought your lips back to his, kissing you deeply before pushing you down onto the soft mattress. "i want you to get comfortable."

you nodded excitedly, kicking off your shoes and watching him unbuckle his belt as you backed yourself up against the pillows. he kneed his way onto the bed, pants unzipped and shirt discarded, but stopped his undressing to crawl towards you, hands running over your split thighs. you groaned, hips rolling towards him just at the sight of him between your legs, and he gazed up at you sweetly.

"you're soaking through your panties."

you took a heaving breath. "you're super hot."

his lips skated over your inner thigh, and you gripped at the duvet as you tried to stifle a moan. his hands went under your thighs, squeezing at your ass before hooking under your panties, and you bit your lip to keep yourself from whining as he slowly pulled them off you, your skirt falling over your waist when you lifted your hips for him.

"oh, baby, look at you," he cooed, tongue darting out between his lips as he took in the sight. "is that all for me?"

you moaned, rolling your hips off the mattress again, staring at his shoulders as he settled. "fuck, seokmin, please-"

your pleas were interrupted by your own garbled moan as he put his tongue against your inner thigh, biting down on the soft flesh. your hand found his scalp, gripping as he sucked a sweet red rose into your thigh, kissing it gently before moving to repeat the action a little closer to your core.

"oh, god, s-seokmin-" you whined, bucking your hips against him. he gently held your wily hips down as he continued until he was satisfied with the marks, hoping they would stay a while. remind you of him when he wasn't around. his breath hit your core and you keened, desperately asking for his lips, but he only barely teased his tongue over your clit before planting his lips on your other thigh, drawing a shaky moan from you as you gripped his hair.

"fuck, please," you begged, wishing you could move your hips more freely, but his strong grip on you held you in place.

when seokmin decided he was happy with the delicate roses between your legs, he looked up to you, observing the way your chest heaved and you panted, your eyes blown to all hell. your fingers tightened in his hair when he rolled out his tongue, slowly dragging it through your folds.

you moaned, your voice sounding choppy and desperate even to you as your neck stretched out in pleasure. "g-god!"

he hummed against you, his lips kissing at your clit and tongue running over you alternately. you shook as he lapped at you, and he pulled his hands out from under your ridden up skirt in order to push your thighs back, allowing him more comfortable access as you groaned, blue stained fingers leaving his hair to grip at the duvet.

"fuck, seokmin, i'm already so close-"

he hummed again, pulling away but putting two fingers over your core instead, spreading your arousal through your folds and over your clit as he licked his lips. "is my mouth that good to you?"

you arched your back as he continued running his fingers over you. "it's so good."

he lapped at you again, making you let out a high pitched whine as he slowly slipped his fingers into your sweet, tight hole. your eyes shut and you moaned, squeezing his fingers as your arousal seeped out from around them. "your pussy is so cute," he muttered, eyes darting up to your face as you panted. he slowly began to curl his lean, long, instrument trained fingers in your core, pulling more pleas from your lips. "i bet it's cuter when you cum."

"fuck, please," you begged. "please make me cum."

seokmin groaned lightly as he sucked at your clit, rolling his hips against the mattress to relieve some of the pressure he felt from your fingers digging against his scalp, your taste on his lips, your whining moans in his ears.

you noticed the sound of the door, almost processing the meaning before your pleasure interrupted your own thought. "fuck, baby, right there!"

he groaned, digging his fingers further into you to spur your squealing as he flicked his tongue against you, and you practically thrashed against him as you came undone, your thighs pushing into his shoulders as your back arched against the mattress.

you whined dully when he pulled his mouth away from you, your fingers loosening their grip in his spray dyed hair. he never pulled his fingers out of you, not even as he crawled slowly over you, continuing to gently curl into you as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him into your chest.

"you started without me," jeonghan said finally, and seokmin smiled into your neck as you watched your sugar daddy pull off his tie, still whining lightly at the fingers in your cunt. "that wasn't what we agreed on."

"i- ah-" you gasped, thigh pressing against seokmin's arm when his thumb pushed against your clit. "i couldn't wait," you said, hooded eyes watching jeonghan approach.

"found yourself a cute toy, huh?" he quirked his eyebrow at the younger, noticing the way his shoulders rippled under your desperate fingers as he stood at the end of the bed. "are you gonna treat him nice, sweetheart?"

you nodded quickly, fingers finding seokmin's scalp again as you kissed him, loving the way you tasted on his lips. you gasped when he slowly pulled his fingers out of you, his hand running up your waist to hold you stay as he rut his clothed bulge into you, the feeling of cool pleather against your hot core making you moan against him.

"what do you want to do, sweetheart?" jeonghan prompted you, gently leaning against a bedpost as he adjusted himself in his pants

"i wanna ride," you said, breath fanning over seokmin's face as he blushed slightly. his red ears just made you move your hips again desperately. "fuck, seokmin, i need to ride you."

his movements stopped for a second, mind whirling with the idea of you bouncing on him. his thoughts were only interrupted by a voice.

"you heard her, seokmin."

he snapped into action, kissing you again as he shoved his slightly too tight pants down his hips, and you pushed him until he allowed you to roll him into his back. you tugged his pants down his legs, gulping at the bulge in his underwear.

"jesus, seokmin, you never said you were packing," jeonghan chuckled, observing the way you faltered when you noticed his length.

seokmin sucked in a labored breath when you ran your hands over his hips, teasing a thumb over his erection. "you never asked."

you tugged his underwear down over his hips, taking care to pull him gently out to avoid harm. you rolled your tongue out to draw a wet line up the underside of his heavy cock, enjoying the way it flinched up against you. 

"he likes tits," jeonghan said, shrugging off his blazer and walking to the side of the bed to toss it onto a chair. "lose the top, angel."

you smirked up at seokmin, suddenly extremely happy that the only one that interested you at this party was someone jeonghan knew. you slinked up his body to straddle his lap, the hem of your skirt teasing the head of his cock as it peeked out from under it. you kissed him first, and his hands ran up your thighs as he bucked his hips up to meet your bare core, but you hovered just out of reach. you sat up again, pulling the cheer top over your head and tossing it to the side.

seokmin groaned, hands finding your waist and running up your sides to squeeze gently at your breasts with his thumbs. "fuck, you're gorgeous."

"and you're huge," you said, finally grinding down against his length, pulling a deep groan from his chest. you backed up to stand his cock on end, pulling it against your stomach and practically choking when you saw how tall it stood, the tip far past the waistband of your skirt.

jeonghan whistled. "how are you gonna stuff all that in your tight little pussy, sweetheart?"

saliva gathered in your mouth at the thought. "like a good girl."

seokmin groaned again, hips bucking up to fuck into your hands. "stop teasing and take it, baby."

you got on your knees, positioning yourself over the head of his thick cock, and he practically bucked up into you when he felt your wetness at his tip. you gasped, sinking slowly, eyes watering slightly at the stretch and seokmin moaned, hands on your waist in support. you looked at jeonghan briefly, and he smiled, cock in hand, watching you as you sank slowly.

"stop," seokmin said, grip tightening on your waist. he panted as he held you in place, and you had an idea as to why he stopped you as you felt him pressing against your cervix. "i don't wanna hurt you."

his gentleness was a welcomed juxtaposition from jeonghan's usual intensity. you nodded, hands on his chest, then leaned forward to kiss him, gently fucking yourself on as much of his length as you could manage, readying yourself. his grip on your waist tightened, and he let out a beautiful whine when you dipped a little further onto him.

"careful," he breathed, and you sat up. your hands ran down his chest and over his stomach, then up your own body to gently coerce his fingers out of the deathgrip on your waist. he took the hint, running his hands up your torso and running his thumbs over your hardened nipples.

you groaned, your hips inching closer to his every time you bounced on his lap. it took everything in him to not take control, your pussy squeezing and pulling him further into you, the only sound in his ears your musical moans as you started to get desperate.

"fuck, you're so big," you said dumbly, unable to think of anything else. 

"you're so tight," seokmin said back. he hooked a thumb under your skirt, tugging it up to reveal how tightly your cunt hugged him. "fuck, you look so good filled up like that."

your hands found his thighs, leaning back as you rolled your hips over his. you choked out a moan, the angle nearly making you fold an instant. "d-daddy, can i cum?"

seokmin groaned and almost responded before jeonghan did. "go right ahead, angel. let him feel how good you are."

you sank down, your hips meeting seokmin's and a whining moan leaving you lips as he choked slightly. you fell forward onto his chest, giving him desperate, open mouthed kisses as you rolled your hips, your sensitive nub rubbing against his pelvis. you gasped, clutching at his hair as he pushed his hips up into yours, the coil in you snapping in you all while he muttered how good of a girl you were against your lips. his grip around you tightened as your grip around him did the same, the feeling of your tight cunt pulsating around him almost enough to get him off despite him steadying his hips as you shuddered on his chest.

"beautiful," jeonghan commented. "she looks good when you fuck her."

seokmin tried not to groan, but the involuntary movement of his hips triggered an unhidable moan from you. "never thought i'd enjoy being watched."

"i always knew you were a freak," the older said, continuing to pump himself. "you okay if i take a little control?"

seokmin finally looked over to his friend, eyes dropping to his cock as he gulped. "y-yeah."

"alright. sweetheart, time to get up. i want that skirt off."

you whined, grinding down on seokmin. he choked, and you dug your face into his neck.

"three..."

you whined again, louder this time, gripping a bicep as you took in a breath. "please, he feels so good-"

"two..."

you curled your toes in protest, and seokmin had the least control when you rolled your hips on his again, both of you letting out shaky moans. you heard your name as a warning, and you practically started crying from how badly you didn't want to remove yourself from him.

"y/n. one."

you caved finally, not wanting jeonghan to punish you in front of a guest, sitting yourself up suddenly and gasping at the feeling, seokmin's hands gripping your hips. you looked over to jeonghan, who had a smile on his face as he bit his lip gently.

"off, angel. you can have him again in a second."

you slowly pulled yourself off of seokmin's hard cock, and he had one hand keeping your skirt out of view, the other kneading reassuring circles in your thighs as you did. you both groaned when you managed to lift yourself off of him completely, and jeonghan watched your arousal drip from you onto seokmin's flushed cock.

"c'mere, sweetheart," jeonghan said, gesturing for you to come to the side of the bed where he stood.

you unzipped your skirt and let it fall to the mattress as you weakly kneed yourself over to him, thighs shaking. seokmin tucked one hand behind his head and wrapped the other around his cock, watching you intently as you came up to the eldest. he gripped your chin first, opening your mouth before him, and you rubbed your thighs together as you vocalised.

"embarrassed?" jeonghan asked, chuckling darkly when you nodded lightly. he spat in your mouth anyways. "don't let me make it to one next time."

you heard a groan behind you as you swallowed, then gasped when jeonghan's free hand found your ass, pulling you against him. he kissed you, and you had almost forgotten how his lips felt against yours, how his nimble tongue brushed against the back of your teeth in a way that made your knees wobble on the edge of the bed.

"i want him to ruin you," he muttered against your lips, grip tight on your jaw. "i want to see you fucked out on his fat cock, choking on my cum."

you nodded fervently, and felt the bed shift as seokmin sat up behind you. jeonghan smiled as he let you go, and you quickly backed up against the younger, gasping when his cock slipped between your thighs and his fingers pinched at your nipples, kneading your breasts tightly.

"fuck, she's incredible," he said, against your neck, and you couldn't help the sustained whine you let out. "i can't believe you never told me, han."

he chuckled, rolling up the sleeves of his dress shirt. "i knew she'd like you too much. but you'll always call me, right, sweetheart?"

you whined again, watching as jeonghan gently kneed onto the bed, just to brush his lips against yours.

"answer me."

you quivered, grinding down on seokmin's cock and feeling his lips on your neck, but still focusing on the face before you. "yes, daddy."

he smiled, placing a gentle kiss on your nose before backing up again. "hands and knees. give us a minute, okay, minnie?"

the younger nodded, but groaned when you dropped forward, watching the way his cock fit snugly between your thighs. "tell me when."

you stared up at jeonghan as he put a hand on his cock, another in your hair, and slowly guided himself towards your lips. you puckered your lips to meet him, then opened your mouth and rolled out your tongue, lapping at the tip of his cock, tongue gliding under it as you desperately tried to suck him into your waiting mouth.

"oh sweetheart," he said, watching you with hooded lids. "you really want this, don't you?"

you whined, pushing back against seokmin, making his breath hitch. jeonghan finally pushed his hips forward, fucking once into your wet mouth, and you moaned on his cock as it hit the back of your throat. seokmin couldn't help but buck into your thighs, slightly desperate for friction as he watched you drip all over him. he tested his voice once, then quietly asked if he could finger you.

you moaned again, and jeonghan smiled as he fucked your mouth. "sounds like she wants it."

you let out a muffled whine when seokmin slotted two fingers into your pussy, your mouth too full to properly vocalise how good it felt. when he added another finger, you almost collapsed, and likely would have if jeonghan hadn't been holding you up by your hair.

"fuck her," he commanded, holding you on his cock and watching the way you looked up at him as you realized what that meant.

seokmin pulled his fingers out of you and placed himself at your entrance in their stead, sinking into you slowly. your eyes rolled back, drool dripping from either side of jeonghan's cock as seokmin filled you out.

"fuck," he said, gripping your hips and trying to stop himself from pushing all the way in. "fuck, you're so wet."

you let out another muffled noise, pushing back onto him as he choked. jeonghan watched the tears well up in your eyes, mouth stretched around his cock.

"angel," he paused, pulling from you slightly. "are we still green?"

you nodded, rolling your tongue around him to prove it. he smiled at you, then quietly told seokmin to fuck you full.

and he did. you whined and babbled, every thrust of seokmin's hips pushing you onto jeonghan's cock until he hit your throat. you didn't know how long it continued. you heard a honey voice you were familiar with, but you couldn't tell if the teasing words were directed towards you or the man behind you. you couldn't even register fully what was happening when you felt fingers circling your clit, and you wailed as you came, thighs quaking and throat full.

"oh, fuck, i'm gonna cum," seokmin said quickly. he gasped. "fuck, can i cum?"

jeonghan grinned, one eye closing more than the other as he huffed, feeling close to his own release. "fill her up."

seokmin jerked into you three more times before he steadied his hips and let out a deep, melodic groan, buried deep in you as his cum leaked out around his thick cock. you were still moaning, unsure if you could ever stop making noises, but quickly pulled yourself together as jeonghan came down your throat.

you choked once, but swallowed around him, and he gripped his fingers against your scalp as you did. when he finally removed himself from your mouth, you panted and collapsed onto the bed, unable to catch your breath with seokmin still hilt deep in you.

"what a perfect girl," jeonghan muttered, brushing his damp hair off his forehead, gazing down at you. "smart, funny, and an angel in bed. and you-" he said, smirking at seokmin when he finally lifted his head from your spine, even if it was only for a moment. "you surprised me. if you're down, i'd like to do this again."

he tried to catch his breath, but couldn't help the way his hips involuntarily pushed into yours, fucking his cum deeper into you. he just nodded against your spine as you moaned, feeling his cum drip down your thighs.

jeonghan tsked. "you got your hair dye all over my white sheets."

#HAHAHAHHA #im on fire #im literally on fire #i wrote this all in one go and i am on fire #ok but like can you imagine a seokhan sandwich for real #theyre both so hot #for like completely different reasons #okay anyways #i have to go eat something its literally 4pm and i havent gotten out of bed #happy halloween!! lol #seventeen imagines #seventeen smut #seventeen scenarios #yoon jeonghan imagines #yoon jeonghan smut #yoon jeonghan scenarios #lee seokmin imagines #lee seokmin smut #lee seokmin scenarios #lets go heathens! #i wrote dis #hannie #sunshine #poly seokhan au

[lovenhlboys]

From a Distance (E.Pettersson X Reader)

Chapter 1

Masterlist

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A/n: hello peoples!! I’m so excited to FINALLY post the first chapter of this fic!!! I’ve been working on it for a long time, and after a few unpleasant delays, it’s finally happening 😁. While this isn’t my first fic, this is my first NHL fic, and the first fic I’m posting on Tumblr, so I’m a little nervous. This first chapter is mostly the set up to the main story, this is reader’s side of things with a flashback story. Chapter two will be mostly from Elias’s point of view. The rest of the chapters will switch back and fourth between the two.

CREDIT: Finally, before we get started I have to shout out my proofreaders. Y’all put up with me and my insanity: @siriushxney @iateyourdonuts @petey-patty @hufflepuff-girlx @cherrylita @immmbabyyygraceee @💕💕And specifically @imagines-r-s ASH!!! Babes, you have been the best and most supportive friend I could’ve asked for during this. You boosted my confidence about this fic and I have no idea what I’d do without you 😁😁

Without further ado, let’s get started shall we!! (Sorry for the long A/N, it’ll only be for this first chapter)

Paring: Elias Pettersson X Fem!Reader

Warnings: lots of cursing, friends with benefits but like...just cuddling???, references to iCarly, mentions of One Tree Hill.

Genere: enemies-ish —>friends —> lovers

Legend: (i suggest having these ready before you read)

Y/C/N/N= your cute nick name, only Markstrom calls you it (you’ll see why) this can be either a pet name you like, or a nick name you already have.

Y/N/N= your nick name, Brock, Quinn, and a few others call you this, it’s more of a playful name. Again, this can be a nickname you already have (if you don’t have one I suggest something stupid (sounds like something Stech or Brock would come up with)

Y/N= this is your first name, only Elias calls you this unless it’s a serious situation, or you’re in trouble, or Brock is being an ass. (If it wasn’t clear before...your last name is Boeser)

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: you have a hardcore crush on your brothers best friend, who also happens to barely speak to you...it’s a slight predicament.

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(This is set in the 2021 season, however, because of my denial, Marky and Stech are still in Vancouver and were never traded... also no Covid. however the season was still delayed just to make it easier to follow.)

Present (Feb. 2021)

You’ve always been best friends with your older brother, you never had any real issues when you were younger and you were inseparable. So much so in fact, that once you graduated early a little less than two years ago (June 2019), he asked you to move to Vancouver and live with him. He was always so protective of you and you appreciated everything he has done in your life. One of the best parts about Brock being your older brother was the people he introduced to you. You aren’t very social and god knows how much of a people person your brother is. Once you had moved in, Brock quickly introduced you to the team. And with your double major in Statistics: Data Sciences and Sports Management, you were able to secure a job with the team. Quickly, you found yourself with a second family, one with many members.

Quinn Hughes is your best friend. when you met him about a year and a half ago, you hit it off immediately. With both of you being the same age and not very social, there was an obvious connection there. When Brock and The boys  go out, it is you and Quinn who stay in and watch shows on the couch (your favorite being New Girl). Huggy Bear is so sweet and you tell him EVERYTHING, even things you’d never tell your brother. You are still thanking the draft lottery every day that the Canucks received the 7th overall pick that gave you your bestie.

Thatcher Demko AKA Dems AKA Thatch AKA baby goalie is the sweetest and most hilarious guy you know. He is always looking after you just like Brock, but he is also one of the most annoying guys you know. When you’d first met you had the biggest crush on him. You told Quinn as much and he gave you so much shit for it. That crush was short-lived though, once you found out how obnoxious he could be. You still love him, just as a friend. Though Quinn never forgets to remind you of the crush that once was.

Bo Horvat is like another big brother to you. Sure you have Brock, but he’s your best friend. Bo, however, is the person you go to when you needed advice. Holly is one of the only WAGs you’ve become close with. She and you consistently have wine and gossip nights, of which Quinn is sometimes in attendance. Plus, you and Quinn are an amazing babysitting team for Gunnar if you have anything to say about it. 

Troy Stecher is the annoying older brother you never had. He always makes fun of you, calls you names, and bullies you in the loving way brothers do. And he never hesitates to come to you if he ever needs girl advice, which seems to happen a lot.

JT was just like Bo, except he is waaay more protective of you, maybe even a bit more than brock. He doesn’t have a sister and when you met, he made it his job to never see you get hurt. Seriously, one day a guy was bugging you at the bar, and both Brock and Bo were struggling to hold him back when he saw him slap you on the ass as you walked away. 

Jacob Markstrom, AKA Marky, AKA Giraffe (pronounced like it is in one of your favorite vines), AKA your cuddle buddy for the past few seasons. Both being single, you felt lonely sometimes and Quinn wasn’t much of a hugger (despite what the nickname might have you believe). Thatcher had offered but Marky, though just as social, is much more laid back. It also helps that he is 6’6 putting him over a foot taller than you. So during movie nights, or late nights at the bar, he is the side you lean on. Of course, you made it abundantly clear to most of the boys and yourselves that you were just friends. As sweet as he was and as great of a boyfriend as he would’ve been, he wasn’t quite your type and your personalities clashed.

Then there was Elias Pettersson, the tall, skinny, Swedish guy you knew as Petey. The guy who looked at you often and barely spoke a word directed towards you. He was Brock's best friend and he came over all the time, you didn’t have an issue with him, and you couldn’t deny he was funny, and from what you’ve heard he is a very kind person. So naturally, he was exactly your type. You’ve had a massive crush on him for a while now, somehow despite the lack of conversation. And the few times he has talked to you, he’s seemed so perfect, but there are only a few times you can remember. 

Right now, as you're on your way to the Canuck’s break room your brother texted you to meet him in, you try to recall those few times, specifically the one where your crush on him truly developed.

--------------------------

FLASHBACK (some time in January, 2020)

--------------------------

You, Quinn, and Jacob were laying on the L-shaped couch in ‘The Boeser apartment’, you were cuddled under the blanket with Jacob, laying on the section perpendicular to the TV, your heads at the corner. Quinn was on the other side of the couch, his head right next to yours. it was about 7 o’clock and the episode of One Tree Hill you were watching had just ended and you three had not eaten dinner yet. As the countdown for the next episode started, your stomach growled and you got a look from Quinn and a giggle from Jacob. 

“You hungry Y/C/N/N?” Jacob asked.

You looked up at him and giggled, “maybe just a little bit.”

“Y/N/N, you know what sounds amazing?” Quinn asked, you could hear the smirk in his voice.

You turned to each other and you both smirked knowing you were thinking the same thing.

“Spaghetti tacos!!” You both said. 

Ever since you were about 10 and you watched iCarly on TV, you had always wanted to try them. It had become an inside joke between you and Quinn for quite some time as he had the same desire as you to see how good they actually were.

“We should totally try them tonight!!” Quinn was quite excited.

“I’m so confused right now,” Jacob chimed in.

“They’re from a show! They take spaghetti and put it in taco shells,” you explained.

“Ahh, hence the name.” he nodded.

“Exactly,” Quinn said.

You jumped up from the couch excitedly and ran straight to your kitchen.

“Ok, we have spaghetti, spaghetti sauce, ground beef, taco shells, aaaand..... by chance do either of you know how to make good meatballs?”

“You’re asking the Swedish guy if he knows how to make meatballs?” Jacob replied.

“Not Swedish meatballs, Italian, stupid Giraffe,” you retorted. 

“Gross,” he said with a disgusted look.

“Ooo my mom made the best Italian meatballs, let me call her to see if she can send me the recipe!” Quinn said with a big smile.

Quinn exited the kitchen and ran to your room to call his mom. 

“You know, I’ve never seen him so excited about anything,” Marky said with a laugh. 

“Quinn loves his food,” you replied.

“Are Brock and Thatch having dinner with us ?”

“I’ll ask.”

You started boiling the water for the pasta, and you cooked part of the ground beef for the meat sauce. Then you texted Brock:

Y/N/N: hey, you want me to make you dinner

Brock: Yeah, who all is there?

Y/N/N: the usual

Brock: Huggy and Marky?

Y/N/N: yep, so do you want some?

Brock: Yeah, and make enough for another person too

Y/N/N: ok

You figured it was Dems since that’s who he went to hang out with when he left 5 hours ago. 

You continued to cook when Quinn came in and grabbed a bunch of stuff from the pantry and cabinets. “Did your mom tell you how to make them?” you questioned your frantic best friend.

“Yes she did and she sent me the recipe too.”

“Coolio,” you reply.

------------------------

You were almost done cooking, the pasta was done, Quinn had put his meatballs in the oven and there were only 5 minutes left on the timer. And the sauce had about 2 minutes to simmer.

“Oh my gosh, I forgot what to do when they're almost done, she does this thing, I have to call her,” Quinn said with a panicked look on his face. He ran back to your room.

The front door to your apartment opened quickly, both boys laughing, “ahh, shit,  my brother’s calling me,” Brock said as he ran back to his room.

“Why does everyone feel the need to exit the room for phone calls?” you asked Jacob.

He shrugged with a giggle, “I don't know, maybe they don’t trust us,” he said in a sarcastically dramatic tone grasping his chest.

The door closed slowly and you glanced at the doorway where you thought you’d see the ever adorable goalie, Thatcher Demko, instead, you saw the adorable, slender, tall blonde you’d seen all the time, but never had a one on one interaction with... except the first time you met, when he told you that you looked pretty.

“Hi, Petey!” Jacob said as he slipped behind you to watch you mix the sauce, he stood over you looking at the sauce and put his hand on your waist.

“Hi,” he replied, his smile from before had faded.

“Looks so good Y/C/N/N,” Jacob said with a kiss on your cheek, a regular action. 

“Thanks, Giraffe, can you grab the taco shells?”

He grabbed them easily from the top shelf (tall ass bitch -_-), and moved behind you, placing his hands on your waist yet again, to move you to the side. “I've gotta run to the bathroom, but I’ll be right back”

“Ok, you have fun with that,” you said with a wink.

Suddenly, was only you and Elias in the room, and the silence was deafening.

“So what are we eating?” he said, pulling your attention to his bright blue eyes.

“Um, spaghetti tacos, they're from a tv sho-”

“Like from iCarly?” he interrupted.

“...Uh yeah? How'd you know?” you couldnt pull your attention away from his eyes, ‘they are just so beautiful,’ you thought somehow you hadnt noticed this within the on and a half years you’d known him.

“We also get Nickelodeon, you know,” he said while throwing you a smirk that made your stomach flip. 

“Oh, I didn't know that,” you replied, feeling just a little embarrassed. 

“iCarly was my favorite, actually.” 

“Yeah, it was mine too,” you said, smiling back, looking at the way he just lit up your kitchen with his presence.

You both stood there for a second just looking at the other, “So how long have-,” he started.

“OKAY,” Quinn unknowingly interrupted, “so she told me what to do, turns out I have to put sauce over them for the last 2 minutes, so Y/N/N can you just put a tablespoon of sauce on each ball then put them back in for two minutes?” 

“Yeah of course. Elias, you were saying?” you looked back at the Swede.

“Oh it's nothing,” he looked down at his shoes. 

“Ok, Y/N/N you need to call mom and tell her we’re fine and that she doesn't need to worry about us please, Paul says she’s stressing,” Brock said as he entered the room.

“When is she not stressing about us? I’ll call her after dinner, how's dad?”

“Doin’ good, nothing has changed or progressed or whatever since we were home last,” Brock moved and sat on the couch letting out a big sigh.

“That’s good,” you let out a sigh.

“Petey, come here, we’re watching Gossip Girl” Brock shouted at the Swede.

“Ooo what episode are you guys on?” you asked. Brock had mentioned how he was making him watch the show you two had watched about 5 times together. 

“Just after Chuck gets Dan kidnapped at Yale.” 

“Oh so you still hate Chuck?” you asked Elias.

“Ew, yeah...wait is that gonna change?” Petey said with a scoff.

“Uh....,” you stalled.

“Y/N shut up, don't spoil it,” Brock interrupted before you could make it worse.

“Ok well, dinner is ready so just start the show after and we can all watch it together.”

--------------------------

“Oh my god, these are actually amazing,” Quinn said with his mouth full.

“I know, I did not think this was gonna taste good,” Jacob added.

“Hey!” you said, offended.

“Y/C/N/N, you know I love your cooking, it was the idea of the meal that I doubted,” Jacob said leaning into your side and putting his arm around your shoulder.

“Mmmhmm, suuure,” you said, rolling your eyes.

“Hallå Marky, ni två är söta (hey Marky, you two are cute),” Petey said, confusing you, Quinn and Brock with the sudden change in language.

Jacob, being oblivious to what Petey was implying, just said, “tack broder (thanks, bro).”

Little did you know what was going on in Elias’s head.

--------------------------

PRESENT

--------------------------

Before that night, you never really thought of Elias in a romantic way. You'd been around him quite a lot, seeing as how, seemingly, is in your apartment more than his own. Sure, you knew he was cute and very sweet from what you'd seen, but up until that point, you'd never had a one-on-one interaction with him. That interaction, however small, was the beginning of an obsessive crush. Quinn was the first to point it out, you started listening closely any time he talked, attempting to converse with him, and thinking about him on a daily basis even when you didn't see him. And due to your stubbornness, no matter how unrequited your crush seemed, it never faltered. You had always thought he hated you, or maybe he just tolerated you because you were Brock’s sister, and you were always around. 

However, that couldn't be farther from the truth.

--------------------------

Tag list: @calgarycanuck @suffering-canucks-fan

#from a distance: series #pls let me know what you think!! #hockey #nhl #elias pettersson #vancover canucks #elias pettersson fic #brock boeser #elias pettersson x reader #elias pettersson imagines #elias pettersson imagine #vancouver canucks imagines #vancouver canucks fic #hockey fic #nhl fic #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #hockey imagine #hockey imagines

[uh-velkommen]

The White Lotus, HBOMax

Alright four episodes in and things are finally starting to ramp up. My face throughout the whole episode was stuck on discomfort. This show packs so much tension in every 45 minutes that I'm constantly waiting for somebody to pop off or something crazy to happen but instead we get teased with the smallest little plot pusher. Which is working. I'm officially intrigued. I do wish I knew the overall point of the show because that's what would've helped me decide if I wanted to keep up with but now my determination to find out how this all ends is doing just that...

Character breakdown + Spoilers/Predictions

Armond: The manager of the White Lotus resort. I love him in all his poor choices. He's just constant chaos simply because he has the power to create it. He's also the biggest driver of drama. He lies a lot, almost pathologically, and he will carry those lies to the grave for no real reason.

Nicole Mossbacher: Resort guest, Mark's wife, and Olivia and Quinn's mom. She's a pretty basic character who is teased about possibly having OCD and working during vacation. She was pretty chill in the first 2 episodes but every once in a while she says things that gives off I'm a centrist but my views lean a little more conservative.

Mark Mossbacher: In the beginning he's stressing about possibly having testicular cancer because his father died of cancer... Turns out his father had AIDs. He has a depressive episode over his dad being gay and then, while drunk, he inadvertently comes onto the Armond. The next day Armond tests the waters with Sober Mark and we get uncomfortably funny scenes of Armond coming onto Mark in front of the whole family. Mark's a very passive dude who doesn't do anything exciting in the show but we just find out that he has, in the past, repeatedly cheated on his wife and didn't tell her (he told his son that he did tell Nicole but I don't believe it) I think his theme is just being genuinely unhappy with his life at the moment.

Olivia Mossbacher: She's a college sophmore and has many moments where she calls out her parents questionable statements. She carries herself with a weird nonchalance where you'd think she's a mean girl but she's only ever expectedly mean to her brother. However, she brought along her friend Paula and we start to see that their friendship is built on some unspoken competition. The girls do tons of drugs on vacay until Armond gets his hands on them and breaks his 5 year sobriety. This is when and why shit starts to hit the fan. They know he stole the drugs but because everyone avoids admitting to having illegal drugs, no one is ever outright accused.

Paula: Olivia's poc friend, possible hypochondriac, and supplier of drugs, has secret rendezvous with one of the Hawaiian native resort workers. She refuses to say anything when asked about her nightly disappearances but Olivia knows why or for whom Paula keeps sneaking off. We learn that Paula doesn't want Olivia to know about her and her beau because Olivia always wants what she has. My theory is that this wouldn't be the first time Olivia has stolen a partner of hers and I think now because Paula isn't admitting to hooking up with this guy, Olivia is gonna steal him and use Paula's secrecy as a way of blame.

Quinn Mossbacher: Involuntary loner in my opinion. He comes off as a classic video game nerd, obsessed with the internet, cant live without his Switch and Fortnite. He doesn't have any friends and he takes all the teasing from Olivia and Paula without a fuss. But he starts sleeping on the beach alone and keeps running into these amazing sights to see. This is where we start to see him blossom and speak up. Its ever so slow but in episode 4 he actually walks up to a group of guys and introduces himself, interested in their boat related sport[?] (Or maybe even the guys themselves🤞) He's also the only one who knows about the Dad's affair and stupidly hints at it at the family dinner (he's just genuinely stupid).

Shane Patton: Also a resort guest and the funniest character to me. He's your run of the mill self-centered male Karen (Kevin if you will) and he arrives at the resort with his wife Rachel. They're on their honeymoon but so many moments make you question why in the hell did these two get married? He is in an unnecessarily one sided battle with Armond. First the resort accidentally downgrades his room. Armond gaslights Shane into thinking that he never purchased the bigger room. Shane gets a receipt. Armond tells him there's a German couple staying in the receipted room longer than Shane and his wife are there so the room will not be ready for them in time. Shane finds out the Germans are actually leaving wayy earlier. Armond apologizes and books them a romantic sunset dinner on a boat. The boat is actually a funeral where a strange grieving woman, named Tanya, fails to spread her mothers ashes in the sea. Shane confronts Armond and asks for Corperate's number. Armond creates a fake business card and when Shane realizes the number is fake, he bursts into Armond's office to find him rimming a coworker while high on Ketamine. Prediction: Armond's gonna get blackmailed for abuse of power in a classic Monicagate manner.

Rachel: Shane's wife. Rachel's a journalist who actually looked up to Nicole (her job as CEO of god knows what puts her in the public eye) but when she finally got to sit with Nicole over lunch, Nicole calls her out for writing an incredibly slut shamey article, claiming that Nicole used her femininity to get her where she is now. This is the first smack in the face that maybe journalism isn't for Rachel. Well that on top of the constant teasing from Shane about her career choices. Shane's family is much more wealthy than Rachel's and he always finds subtle ways to make it known. Shane also pays her no mind, flirting with Olivia and Paula and battling Armond. Even during their arguments (which happens too many times for newlyweds) Shane doesn't look at Rachel and just gives periodic "mhmm"s and "okay"s. Also Rachel hates the Mossbacher family simply because they all seem to be doing better than her.

Now for the boring ones

Tanya McQuoid: An eccentric resort guest (which is a polite way of saying, a weird ass person who is over polite and basically pushes herself into every other character's drama in the most unintentional way, she's also bad at reading the room) She comes off as calm and quiet but we find out that her mother recently passed and she's in Hawaii to spread her mothers ashes. She becomes creepily obsessed with the resort's massage parlor manager, Belinda, after a complimentary massage and suggests becoming a beneficiary so Belinda can open up her own massage parlor. Her "obsession" could possibly just stem from Belinda showing her an act of kindness during a hard time but I know I questioned Tanya's intentions for at least the first two episodes... In episode 4, some random dude, Greg, shows up and invites Tanya to dinner after "accidentally" mistaking her room door for his own. Tanya postpones a business meeting with Belinda so she and Greg can hook up that night. The presence of these characters feel a little out of place. Unlike the Newly Weds and the Mossbacher family, there is not a lot of plot overlap. Tanya will often pop up to converse with the others and brag about Balinda's skills but she doesn't cause any trouble. Tanya's also very wealthy so I definitely thing this "Greg" has some secret plot to take down Tanya or plant something or steal her cash and unfortunately I do not think Belinda will see anything bright in her future. Her plans will be left on the backburner which I say is unfortunate because she's a kind woc who is just trying to do her job and is clearly very skeptical about going into business with this strange, rich white, resort guest.

Honorable Mention

Lani: A Hawaiian native, trainee at the White Lotus. She shows up in episode one as her first day on the job. Later we find out she's also pregnant and goes into a premature labor on the job. She has her baby and disappears for the next three episode. Come back Lani, Armond has just started getting your name right!

Show Themes

The show does touch on conversations of race and class but I would not consider this a political show or one with an agenda (it's satire). I point out the characters of color here because their race becomes a device used to create tension but not in a Token POC kind of way. All the characters are rich and they are shamed for it by the show writers. By this I mean nobody is spitting in their faces and calling them Climate Killers but the choices the characters make, the things they say, and the way they act gives the viewer something to laugh at. Their ignorant entitlement juxtaposing with the beautiful Hawaiian beaches and tragic Hawaiian history creates an underlying experience of, look at these rich people not having a good time and they can't even realize why! As for the characters, there is plenty of time to sit back and question, is this character a good person, who's the real antagonist, how do these stories intertwine, who do we root for What story is attempting to be told here? What is the message!?

#the white lotus hbo #the white lotus #the white lotus hbomax #hbo max

[albatris]

HELLO yes!! Hmm ok I'm not the greatest at thinking of interesting questions uh. Okay. How do the Rental Car cast deal with stress?? Like not necessarily Plot Relevant Stress but like. Minor inconveniences that are still really stressful. Idk how much sense this makes

hiiii!!! thank you for the question :D (you are perfectly fine at thinking of interesting questions, don't worry!!)

stress!! oh, they are just an incredibly stressed out bunch of people, regardless of what's going on in the plot lmao

a regular level of Nat stress usually just requires some relaxation time and self-soothing to clear his head :P cooking is a pretty common way for Nat to de-stress, but usually only takes maximum effect when there are other people around to share in the end result. he gets a huge mood boost from making other people happy and an even bigger mood boost from being showered in compliments on his dishes ahahaha

a good cuddle session is also a favourite way to relax, so if there's a willing friend available to nap on or against, the friendly contact and Nice Sensory Pressure is very soothing for him, plus this shuts the Garble up for a while bc it too wants to be Cosy

very very brand new vampire Nat is still pretty unstable in general so stress can tip into the Bad Zone for him pretty quick, and any stress that looks like it's barrelling towards "I am going to be a danger to myself and others if I can't bring myself down" requires a more aggresive approach. any safely contained way for him to violently work off aggression and frustration and anxiety usually does the trick, for Nat he loves to use his pointy little murder teeth to shred the fuck out of some good sturdy chew toys lmao. veeeery good for regulating intense emotions. he'd get a kick out of those "we just toss you in a room full of plates and mugs and bottles and let you go wild with a baseball bat" places too fjdks. but yeah in a pinch he'll just gnaw on whatever's available and convenient and isn't someone else's neck. shelves! stationary! storage crates! his own arm

Quinn loves a good expensive impulse purchase. stressed Quinn takes the Treat Yourself approach and will just be like. I had a bad day. I am going to buy an extravagant outdoor spa. or. you know what, I do deserve this fancy ass hand-embroidered lace-edged cape, for Reasons. Quinn likes to indulge and pamper themself! they'll also just go bother whichever friends or acquaintances are close enough n just drape themself dramatically across their lap and be like "comfort me". just complain for an hour while someone strokes their hair and goes "uh-huh" while nodding occasionally. Quinn wholeheartedly believes in the catharsis of a good over-the-top petty complaining session, the more dramatic the better. they are usually very entertaining to listen to

ultra-stressed crisis mode Quinn just gets super mean and scary though. usually deals with stress by taking it out on other people and being vindictive and passive-aggressive as hell, or by bullying other people into dealing with whatever's stressing them lmao

Yvonne! she likes video games to de-stress, though it's kind of a toss up as to whether they'll relax her or just make her more stressed hahaha. there's this one notoriously difficult roguelike with a bit of a cult following she's been obsessed with for like five years now, and over the course of the story she's trying to complete a playthrough with no healing items (which is widely regarded as A Fucking Immensely Impressive Feat). she gets super riled up and yell-y about it, to the point where people are often like "hey are you sure you're not just making yourself more upset and stressed". like NO they don't GET IT, this is different CATHARTIC stress >:c

Yvonne likes to be left to her own devices when she's stressed out, even if she's left to her own devices in the company of other people. like, she's more than happy to hang in the same space as her friends, but if you try to chat to her she might hiss at you

she is. also a chronic involuntary tinkerer. do not leave your pens or TV remotes out in the presence of stressed Yvonne. she will deconstruct them irreparably and without mercy without noticing

Alex is. constantly stressed. to the point where "stressed" is its baseline and just becomes regular Alex. Alex tries to handle stress by pre-emptively eliminating any possibility for stressful situations to occur! which just results in an even more stressed out control freak Alex :( it gets a bit snappy and frustrated with people if they try to change plans last minute and might have a panic attack if anything in its routine goes awry. in its defence, poor Alex has a hell of a lot to be nervous about in the day-to-day

the one thing Alex IS good at over the others is, when stress does get on top of it in a bad way, it has no issues asking for help and advice from its friends. for the most part in the early story this means Quinn, which means sometimes the help and advice isn't particularly useful or legal, but Quinn does their best :P at the very least, Quinn knows Alex well enough to know how to comfort and calm it from its near-incessant worrying, and can give Alex the pause and step back it needs in order to problem-solve on its own c:

so ye, there you have it! :D thank you again for letting me ramble for a bit!! have an excellent day 😎

#a rental car takes a left down rake street and disappears

[gellavonhamster]

ghost stories

Suicide Squad (2016) || characters: El Diablo feat. everyone else || post-canon, sort of a fix-it

ao3 link eng || this was first written and published on ao3 in Russian in 2016 but I didn't attempt to translate it into English back then.  

Harley is the first to see him.

She catches the smell first. Something appears to be burning, and she checks cautiously if there is something wrong with the coffee machine. She doesn’t find anything suspicious – not that the appliances about to flame up smell like that anyway. Could it be that there’s a fire starting? That would be funny, but seems like there’s hardly a chance. It is the smell of a bonfire at the beach, of the fallen leaves being burned in the yards in fall, of a melting candle in the church; weirdly, all this at the same time. A smell that seems too pure for Belle Reve, for Gotham, for everything that makes up her life these days.      

Harley looks around once again – and springs to her feet like she’s been stung.

Chato Santana is standing next to her cage.

“Diablo?” she whispers, unable to believe her eyes. She would’ve thought she’s lost her marbles if there were any left to lose.    

“Harley,” says Diablo, and it’s his voice, his shy, sad smile, his eyes and his tattoos, and Harley squeals in delight as she rushes to him. The bars of the cage are live, so she only dares to stick out the tips of her fingers. He touches them with his hand – certainly alive, certainly not a product of her mind being tortured by boredom and monotony – and she laughs.

“You’re alive, alive, alive! How did you survive? And how did they let you in?”

“It’s a long story. And I don’t think I have much time,” Diablo looks guilty. He’s still holding her hand and looking at her so earnestly it’s almost worrying.  “Harley… don’t go with him.”  

“Huh? What do you mean, honey?”

“He’s coming here. Don’t leave with him, Harley, stay. It sounds strange, but this would really be for the best.”  

“Don’t leave with whom?” she can’t follow him. He gives her a melancholic look – and suddenly disappears. Without any smoke or flames or any other special effects. She can’t wrap her head around how it happened – it’s just that he was here a moment ago, and now there’s no one beside her, and she’s reaching out towards nothing.      

“Diablo?” she calls, and when she gets no answer, she decides to get things straight by asking the guards. What kind of cruel joke is this? Only one person is allowed to joke here, and that person is her. “Hello there! Mister jailer, yoo-hoo! Where’s my friend?”  

No one is in a hurry to respond. Finally, one of the armed-to-the-teeth guards approaches the cage.

“Why are you yelling, lady?”

“Where’s my friend?” Harley asks petulantly. “He was here just now, and we didn’t finish talking. Where did you take him?”  

“There was no one here.”

“What do you mean ‘no one’? I just talked to him!”

The guard examines her from head to foot. Looks like he’s chewing gum, which, combined with his empty apathetic stare, makes him look like a cow.

“Definitely crazy,” he sums up, and leaves. Irritated, Harley forgets to take caution, hits the bars and falls down on the floor right away, writhing in pain.    

“Well, well, well,” she whispers, playing the recent events over in her head. Chato was very much corporeal – not a ghost, then. Yet the guards didn’t notice him, and then he vanished into thin air. Harley thinks about the being Chato transformed into by the end of the battle – an ancient one, as if straight from the walls of some Aztec temple. Could some petty bomb kill such a being? Could the Enchantress’s brother have survived too?  

“I am friends with a god,” she informs the ceiling. “Incredible.”

About an hour later, her Puddin’ comes for her, and she forgets the advice Diablo gave her.  

  Croc sees him on the night of the same day. He knows for sure that it is night thanks to the TV listings – the only reference point for time and days of the week that he has. Not that it was bothering him too much, truth be told. Monday or Sunday, every day in Belle Reve is a carbon copy of the day before. However, Croc doesn’t complain. He has a roof over his head, water, food – even better food than he used to have in the sewers in days gone by – and a TV, and it is honestly not too hard to do without such extras as companionship and fresh experiences. Still, he is glad to see Diablo. Even though first he lunges at him with his fangs bared, because he doesn’t immediately recognize him and supposes that Waller and company are sick of feeding him and decided to kill him. Or to put someone else in his quarters, which would have been no less audacious.        

“Croc, it’s me,” Diablo hastens to say, and lights up a flame over his left palm – so unusual and out of place in the dampness of Croc’s cell. Croc freezes and watches the flame for some seconds. That must really be Diablo; there are hardly many people in the world capable of such tricks.

“Hey, man,” Croc says. “Whatcha doing here?”

“Just checking up on you.”

Well, that must definitely be Diablo. Croc knows that there are hardly many people in the world who’d care to check up on him, but that sounds like something El Diablo would do. Back then, during the mission, he was friendly, asked “You okay?” after each skirmish, and could clap him on the shoulder without shuddering. And there are definitely even less people in the world that would touch him willingly.      

“Did they just let you in like that?” wonders Croc. Diablo gives him a slight smile.

“They don’t know I’m here.”

“So you’re, like, a ghost?” Croc asks. It occurred to him from the very beginning, but it sounds particularly joyless when said out loud.

Diablo gestures vaguely. “I’m still figuring it out myself, to be honest.”

“Hmm,” Croc glances over his cell. A bag of food on the cot catches his eye. “You want a burger?”

“Nah, I’m good. Save it for yourself.”

“They’ll bring more today, I’m telling ya.”  

“Then I want one.”

“Then you’re not a ghost,” grins Croc, and the fact that Diablo doesn’t flinch or try to look away also proves that this is the real Chato Santana, because most people don’t like seeing Croc smile.

And so he and Diablo, who kind of is a ghost but kind of isn’t, sit there eating burgers and watching some crap on MTV. Life has taught Croc not to be surprised by anything, so everything’s fine.  

“So what happened after the bomb went off?” Croc asks. Diablo opens his mouth, and then closes it again, apparently at a loss how to explain.

“I was smoke,” he speaks finally. “Then I was flames. Then I became myself again.”

“I see,” Croc replies, although, of course, he can’t see shit.

“Who are you talking to?” comes the guard’s voice from behind the door. “Hey, scum!”

Croc puts the burger aside.

“Wait a bit,” he tells Chato, gets up, and heads for the door.

When he comes to the bean hole, the guard already looks like he regrets calling him.  

“No one,” Crock smiles as widely as only he can, and the guard, who isn’t among the people able to watch him smile without blinking an eye, steps back reflexively. “But come inside, and I’ll talk to you if you wanna. How about that?”   

When he turns around, Chato has already disappeared, and Croc could have assumed he has dreamed it all, but there are two half-eaten burgers on the cot, not one.

  Digger sees him next, and he isn’t even amazed. The bastards keep drugging him with all sorts of shit to calm him down. Usually after the shot he just lies there, feverish, and can’t even move, let alone stand up, but who knows, perhaps they’re testing some new poison on him. Or they’ve started using something stronger because they noticed that a couple of hours after the usual stuff he’s already able to yell, bang at the door, and do everything he can to get the best of them while cooped up inside. Or it’s simply that there’s already so much of this shit in his blood that it’s impossible not to have any screws loose, try as he might to keep them in place. In any case, he’s not exactly shocked when, as he tosses and turns on the floor after another injection, he turns his head and sees El Diablo, large as life and twice as ugly.

“Fuck me sideways,” Digger says. He doesn’t have any energy to be mad yet. “I must be tripping.”

“You’re not tripping,” Diablo objects.

“You died. So I must be.”  

“I didn’t die either.”

Diablo sits down cross-legged on the floor next to him.

“Has it crossed your mind that if you stop getting on their nerves, they might start treating you better?” he asks.

“Go to hell.”

“Message received.”

There’s a footfall outside; a whole bunch of people must be running somewhere.

“They’ve turned the entire joint upside down,” says Digger, because it’s been ages since he has spoken to anyone who’d at least pretend to listen, so a hallucination will do. “Blondie escaped.”  

“I know,” Diablo replies gloomily. “I tried to warn her not to go with the Joker, but she didn’t listen to me.”  

“Why warn her?” Digger asks. Harley Quinn is no bosom friend of his, but she kind of tore out the heart of the witch who kind of tried to end the world, and anyway, teammates probably should take interest in each other’s lives. Probably. He’s never really made sense of that teamwork stuff. “What’s he gonna do to her?”    

“At best, what he always does.”

Two tiny figures of fire appear on Diablo’s open palm – a man and a woman. The man backhands the woman across her face, and she falls down. Digger watches the dancing flames with fascination, and meanwhile in his head, bit by bit, stroke by stroke, a plan starts to take shape. He wouldn’t be Captain motherfucking Boomerang if he fails to use any opportunity that turns up – even a ghost of one. 

“Listen, mate,” he begins cajolingly. “If you’re really here and it’s not just me tripping… help an old friend out, won’t you? I’m fed up with being stuck here, you know.”

“I’m not gonna help you escape,” Diablo says calmly. “How do you imagine that would even happen?”

“Can’t you just burn the entire Belle Reve to the bloody ground?”

Diablo smiles.

“I can,” he admits. “But I won’t.”

The next thing he knows, the son of a bitch is gone without a trace. Anger and offence must be giving Digger strength, because he manages to leap to his feet. Like a lunatic, he thrashes around the cell, looking for at least some kind of proof that someone else was here a moment ago.  

“Oi!” he shouts, knowing damn well that the guards have long stopped listening to what he has to say. “Grab the devil! A convict escaped! Hey, wankers!”  

But he’s feeling lightheaded, and this shit must be really strong, and he collapses, badly hitting his head.  

  Tatsu sees him next – late at night, in her apartment. She’s a light sleeper, and wakes up as soon as she hears footsteps. The sword is close at hand, and she grabs it instantly, blade swishing through the air.  

“Who’s there?” Tatsu asks, and then repeats in English. “Who’s there?”

There is nowhere to hide in her bedroom. The only furniture is the mattress and the pair of chairs she uses to hang her clothes on. Everything is on the floor or on the windowsill – weapons, her laptop, the book she tried to read before going to sleep but could not concentrate on. It is an ascetic, comfortless dwelling that does not look permanent and is not supposed to become so. Fate and Amanda Waller, though, seem to have other plans in this respect.  

There is nowhere to hide in her bedroom – but someone’s definitely walking in the antechamber; she flings the door open – and sees El Diablo, standing by the entrance and looking around. In a blink of an eye Tatsu is next to him, and the blade of the Soultaker is pressed to his neck.  

“Katana, it’s me,” Diablo says, unfazed. “Chato Santana.”

“Chato Santana is dead,” she says through her teeth. Chato Santana was a gangster who killed, albeit by a tragic accident, his own family – but she fought side by side with him, he sacrificed himself to save the world, he called their squad his family and died for them. That is enough for her not to let anyone use his name as a cover. “Who are you?”    

“I’m alive,” Diablo replies. He puts his hands up to show he’s unarmed, and forks of flame appear on his palms. “Or sort of.”  

Sort of.

Tatsu lowers the sword and looks warily at the man standing in front of her.

“How did you…”

“You’re gonna have a new mission soon. Demand that Waller tells you everything.”

“About what?”

“I couldn’t overhear that,” he says with regret. “But…”

Something knocks on the window. Tatsu turns around quickly, but that must’ve been just a tree branch hitting the windowpane. When she turns back to Chato, he’s already gone, and her apartment is silent.

It’s just four in the morning, but she can’t make herself fall asleep again. Having poured a cup of tea, Tatsu sits down on the mattress and thinks, think, thinks about what just happened. Tatsu believes in ghosts – her sword is teeming with them, so she wouldn’t say that her worldview is shaken. Still, this is strange, very strange. What did he want to tell her? Why did he disappear so abruptly? Like… a broadcast was interrupted.    

Colonel Flag calls her at daybreak and tells her that there’s a shoot-out between two gangs on the outskirts of Gotham, with metahumans on both sides. When Tatsu arrives at Belle Reve, it turns out they must have considered it to be not enough to ruin her Saturday morning, because she is asked – more like ordered, actually – to escort an inmate from his cell, an inmate who attacks anyone who tries to enter and has already injured three guards with his bare hands, and it’s not reasonable to sedate him before the mission, and “he’s likely to obey if it’s you, Katana” – the last is Rick’s argument, and if he told that to her face and not on the phone, she would have had to strain every nerve not to hit him with something.    

No one tries to attack her when she enters the cell of Captain Boomerang – Harkness is sitting on the floor quite still, his arms around his knees, and when he notices her, he even smiles with bruised lips.  

“Hello, gorgeous,” he says. “Am I hallucinating you too?”

“No,” the question is unexpected and confuses her. “Why?”

“Well, they keep injecting me some crap, and lately I’ve been seeing things,” Harkness explains peacefully, even eagerly. His voice is quiet and hoarse, which, combined with his Australian accent, leads to Tatsu being barely able to make out half of what he’s saying. To hear him better, she crouches down next to him, still gripping the sword hilt – there is no telling if he isn’t just making her come closer to take her down and bolt. “Saw the devil yesterday.”      

“The devil?”

“Our devil. Día… de fucking Muertos. Chato Santana.”

Tatsu gives a shiver and, having lost her balance, half sits down, half falls on the dirty floor.

She isn’t the only one to have seen him. She isn’t the only one he wanted to send a message to.

“Hey, luv,” Harkness frowns and reaches out to touch her knee lightly. “You all right?”  

“Same as you, more or less,” she wants to reply, which of course would mean she isn’t, not at all.

“What did he tell you?” she asks him instead.

  When Floyd sees him, he is hardly surprised, since the others have already warned him. Boomerang, Croc, and Katana tell him everything while they’re waiting for the helo, and had it been just Boomerang, who believes inexplicably that he has a sense of humour although he certainly doesn’t, Floyd most likely wouldn’t have believed his ghost stories, but it is even harder to believe that Croc, let alone Katana would agree to take part in such pranks. Which is why he listens to them closely and takes note: okay, then he doesn’t have to worry about his mental heath if the late Santana suddenly appears out of nowhere to give some advice or share some news or simply ask how he’s doing. So the four of them keep whispering to one another like kids at the back of the class until their transport arrives – just the four of them, which is a pity. If there is anyone on the team that he had missed a little, it’s Harley. Floyd knows some things about the Joker, for it isn’t possible, as they write in the papers, to belong to the criminal world of Gotham and not know anything about the Joker. Floyd knows what Flag had spilled to him when visiting him in his cell or escorting him there after a visit to Zoe. Floyd thinks that in his entire lifetime he hasn’t understood a thing about love – is it even possible to understand it, on the other hand? – but he feels like the mad and brilliant Harley, Harley the whimsical, Harley the loving deserves better.                

“What’s with the gossiping?” Flag inquires suspiciously.  

“Nothing!” Croc and Digger answer in unison, in unison, and Floyd facepalms because seriously, are they in some cheesy movie or what? They don’t tell Flag anything yet, but Floyd is almost sure that sooner or later Santana will visit him as well, because Flag is one of them too, after all. Not that he’s even trying to deny it; no one’s making him drop by Floyd’s cell every other day to chat about some nonsense through the steel door.          

So Floyd is hardly surprised when, as he makes his way behind the dumpsters loading one gun after another, he notices a familiar, head-to-toe-tattooed figure standing nearby.  

“There are snipers on the roof over there and around the corner of the shop,” Chato says instead of greeting. Floyd nods.

“I noticed.”

“Eight men in the drugstore on the other side of the street. Each with a machine gun.”  

“How do you know?”

“I’ve just been there.”

“Got it,” there’s no time for lengthy conversations. No time to say: glad you’re alive, man. No time to ascertain: are you alive, though? So he thinks over the plan of action, making a mental note to ask all these questions later, when there are no bullets whistling past their ears.  

People like them deserve no guardian angels, frankly speaking, but they may have managed to earn one for all of them.

#suicide squad #el diablo #harley quinn #killer croc #captain boomerang #katana #deadshot #rick flag #dc #talk talk talk #my fic #gella talks skwad #this might have been the most challenging to translate so far #i'm so used to bookish slightly outdated speech and most of my fandoms allow that #and then bam modernity. ugh #also i know nothing about the geography of the dceu!united states. sorry about that.

[mackeydoodledoo]

Inferno

Pairing: Sylvie Brett x Quinn Maxs (Fem! Paramedic)

Summary: You’re living life with Firehouse 51. But, you begin to feel feelings for your Paramedic-in-charge; Sylvie Brett. You don’t know how to tell her, understanding the history of her past relationships. Most of all, you don’t want her seeing you differently, should you tell her. You only told your fellow paramedic; Gianna Mackey and your best friend and firefighter; Stella Kidd. However, you beg them both to not tell Brett. However, once Hermann’s fill-in comes in, you believe you’ve waited too long to tell Brett how you really feel about her.

Warning: Chicago Fire Season 9 Episode 9: Escape Route spoilers

A/N: Quinn Maxs is my OC for Chicago Fire! Enjoy my first Sylvie Brett imagine!!

Theme: “MAYDAY” - coldrain/Ryo (Fire Force Opening 2)

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As you close your locker and bid Hermann a farewell and to enjoy his vacation you pass by Brett, but a familiar face.... Grainger.... 

"Hey, I remember you, Y/n Y/l/n right?" He asks, smiling 

Hiding your emotions well, you casually salute three fingers to him before hearing the alarm go off. 

"Engine 51, Truck 81, Squad 3, Ambulance 61, structure fire," 

As you heard the address you head to 61 to deploy for the call. 

"Hey why don't you ride shotgun Y/l/N," Mackey suggests, smiling 

"Sure, thanks Mackey," you say, opening the passenger side door 

"Mackey wanted to ride back?" Sylvie asks 

"Yeah, I guess so," you sigh, not looking at her 

"Hey, are you alright? You've seemed to be moping for a little bit." Sylvie asks 

"Oh I'm fine, a little tired. Lack of sleep," You lie 

You were kind of accurate but also very inaccurate. You realized when Sylvie and Grainger were flirting before the call. 

"Tell you what, why not tonight after shift I treat you to Molly's?" She suggests 

"You sure?" You ask 

"Totally," Brett smiles 

81, Squad 3 and 61 arrive at the fire. You notice Grainger giving orders out already however, Casey angrily tells him to wait for his orders. Both you and Sylvie watch that unfold but you think nothing of it as Casey is Captain. But you're assuming 40 doesn't have a captain. 

After the call, 61 running a severely burned mother to Med, you voluntarily hopped in the back, to avoid Brett seeing your emotions become unfolded. Although they could hear you, you were crying on the inside. 

Brett's POV "Hey Mackey do you think Y/l/n is okay?" She asks 

"What makes you think that?" Mackey replies back 

"On our way to the call earlier she wasn't very talkative like she usually is," she says, "I just wanna know if she's talked to you about anything." 

"Nope, she's been quiet about that," Mackey says

Y/n’s POV You lay down on your bed in the quiet area of 51, contemplating life choices. With a handful of Med runs n such, nothing happened out of the ordinary. 

"You doing okay kid?" Stella comes over 

"Well aside from my jealousy of Grainger easily wooing Brett, I'm fine," you sigh 

"You need to tell her before anything happens Y/n," she replies, "You're going to regret it once you decide to tell her when its too late." 

"She is inviting me out to Molly's after shift if that means anything.." you say 

"That’s the perfect time to do it" Stella smiles before walking away

Once the end of shift came and you make your leave. You try to avoid Brett as much as possible. 

"Y/l/n!" Brett calls 

You silently sigh to yourself but put on a happy face for her. 

"You ready to go love?" She asks, slinging her arm around yours as she drags you along 

"For sure," you force a smile 

"Hey why don't you join us later, once your done with inventory?" Sylvie suggests to Grainger 

"I'd love to," Grainger smiles 

On the inside you were freaking out. But you also believed this was the time to tell her, as Stella says. 

"Have you been doing okay y/l/n? You're not as talkative as you usually are," Sylvie asks 

"Just a long day, like I said this morning Brett, I have had a lack of sleep," you sigh, "Hey I'm gonna get a drink from Stella do you want anything?" 

"Just a beer," Sylvie smiles 

You smile back, you realize that's the first time you've smiled around Brett. 

"Have you told her yet Y/n?” Stella asks, coming over to you 

"No," you sigh, "I don't know. You are right by telling her now but I’m just so-" 

You notice Stella looking over your shoulder, "Grainger is there isn't he?..." 

Stella nods, "Sorry Y/n." 

"Two beers," you request, "Might as well be a peace offering." 

"Are you gonna stick around?" She asks 

"I'm just gonna give them the beers and pretty much lie," you say, "Hey, I'll text you if anything happens." 

Stella nods, in approval to your plan. She walks over and gets the beers. You slip her a $10 tip. 

"Half of it is working in a full house, the other is... Well, being my Partner in Crime," you smile as you shake off your sadness and force a smile onto your face as you put the beers between the two supposed lovebirds. 

"For me?" Grainger smiles 

"That's a thanks for today, Welcome to 51," You forcefully smile 

My god I want to leave! You begin to feel an inferno build up inside of you. You wanted to punch him in the face but that would not look good on a report. 

"Hey, I just remembered I left something at the station. I'm going to run and go grab it and I’m gonna call it a night," you lie, "see you later Boss." 

You take your jacket and your helmet and make your leave, putting on your helmet and then gloves. You first make your stop to your apartment, which wasn't too far from Molly's. Grabbing a backpack that would be big enough to store clothes in and essentials. You leave everything clean. As if no one was there. You make haste getting out of your apartment and to your motorcycle, making another leave.

You knock on the door to Boden's office. Which he looks up and greets you how he always does. 

"Chief I need to talk to you, if you have a minute," you say, sitting in a chair 

"What is it Y/l/n?" He asks 

"I know you’re probably not one to listen to somebody's relationship life but um.." You stammer, figuring out how to tell him, "I don't know who else to turn to but only two other people know; Mackey and Kidd. I told them-I told them I really like Brett. However, I’m beginning to see her attraction towards our fill-in Lieutenant; Grainger. But the point is, I'm beginning to feel jealous. On the call this morning I was barely in it until either Mackey or Brett brought me back. I'm not sure if I've ever requested to take time off work. But, I feel that this is the time to. I don't want my emotions getting the best of me again Chief." 

"Who else knows about this kind of request?" Boden asks 

"Just you and me sir," you reply 

"I appreciate the heads up Y/l/n and I appreciate your need to work with your emotions," he says, "How long do you want me to make you absent for?" 

"One month," you request 

"That's um... That's quite a big request Y/l/n," He sighs 

"I understand that completely Chief, but Brett and Mackey are doing an excellent job as a two-person Ambo team, I strongly believe they can do the work in my absence," you say 

"If you strongly believe it then so do I," He says, adjusting something on his laptop, "Is there anything else you need?" 

"Yes," You sigh, "Don't tell Brett anything of what I told you in this moment. I don't want her feeling guilt over this when she and Mackey have lives to save. But if she does happen to ask, just tell her that I have a family emergency. If-if that's too much I can-" 

"It's okay Y/l/n," Boden says, "Go clear your head." 

"Thanks Chief," you smile, making your exit

You stop at a gas station to fill up on your motorcycle and eat before your long drive. As you wait for the gas to fill your tank, you hold your phone up to your ear. 

"Hey, Stella, it's me," you start 

"Hey kid. You doing okay? What's the update?" She asks 

"Well, I first went to my apartment to get some things. I then went to the station and requested the Chief for some days off." You say 

"How long?" She asks 

"A month," you say 

"A MON- oh, sorry. A month?" Stella says 

"Yeah," you say, "I told Boden that Brett and Mackey and manage without me. It's not like I'm leaving 51." 

"That's true," Stella sighs 

"Hey, can you pass the word to Mackey too? I told her about this whole thing too," you say, "But neither of you tell Brett. I'm not having her feel guilty over this. This is for me." 

"Got it kid, I gotta get back to work. Call me if you wanna talk at all," Stella says 

"Noted, bye." You say, hanging up the phone as the gas had just filled up 

As you pull off into a parking spot, you make another call. 

"Hey, it's me," you smile, "Do you have any space in your house for me to stay in for now? You do? Okay, I'll be there in... God, 3-4 hours. Pull off into a hotel for the night? No, I'm good thanks. I'll make the drive. So long as I'm not in the city anymore. Thanks man, I'll try to keep you posted." 

You put your helmet back on and set up your maps into the destination and ride off into the night. Though, you really only made stops at 24-hour gas stations.

Brett's POV The next morning at 51, Brett comes into the station right next to Grainger however, split once they go to their respective engines. 

"Hey where's Y/l/n?" Sylvie asks Mackey when she noticed she's not in the ambo 

"Family emergency," Mackey replies, clearly lying 

"Oh... She didn't tell me," Brett sighs 

"She was in a rush, she only figured out last night," Mackey adds 

She walks over to Stella, "Hey did Y/l/n tell you-" 

"She has a family emergency," Stella says, exactly the same story as Mackey 

"She told you too?" Brett asks, "How come she didn't tell me?" 

Stella looks at Brett, feeling bad she has to lie to her best friend. However, it was for the best for both you and Brett. 

"Who didn't tell you what?" Grainger comes up behind Brett and hugs her 

"One of my paramedics had a family emergency and didn't tell me," Brett says 

"Well let's not worry about that right now," Grainger smiles as he gives Brett a cheek kiss 

"If you guys kiss I’m gonna puke," Stella gags as she walks to the common room, Mackey following

Stella's POV "You're doing a great job Mackey," Kidd says, high-fiving her 

"I'd never tell someone's personal info, unless they told me I could. This isn't one of those times," Mackey smiles 

"Engine 51, Truck 81, Squad 3, Ambulance 61, Battalion 25, multiple hostile situation at 600 E Grand Ave, Chicago, IL 60611" 

"That's Navy Pier," Stella realizes

51 deploys to the coordinates that are set in and by the time they get there, different firehouses and police stations are lined at the entrance. 

"Voight, talk to me," Boden demands as he walks with them 

"Seems like there's more than one perpetrator in this situation," Voight explains, "No casualties thus far, but possible injuries."

Y/n's POV As you get yourself some coffee you pull up the Chicago news radio on your phone. 

"This just in, a multiple hostage situation is currently happening at Navy Pier. All civilians near the vicinity must evacuate immediately." The news reporter explains, "All CPD departments and multiple CFD houses are here at the scene. 

"Sounds like one crazy adventure," your sister says, "glad your home and away from that." 

"Sis, I'm worried," you sigh 

"Is it about that Brett girl?" She asks, "forget her. She's missing one hell of an opportunity." 

"Thing is I don't know if she's Bisexual." You state 

"Even if she is and still sees you differently, she's missing out on a cool little sister," she says, messing up your hair, "I have to head out for work, if you're going out just lock the door and you remember where the spare key is?" 

"I do sis," you smile 

"See you later," she smiles and she closes the door 

You turn back to your phone for the love broadcast of the situation back across Lake Michigan. Your sister was pretty much right on the edge of Michigan, great view of the lake. However, you look out to the window and hope, your house is doing okay. You wish you saw the situation happen from right across it but it was too wide for you to see it happen with your eyes. You sigh, wishing you could leave already. However, you realize your sister has a power boat. You quickly write down a note saying you'll be back and that you're borrowing her power boat. With no sailing experience, turnout gear or medic supplies. Only your bag and communicator, you rush out the door.

"Where's Y/l/n?!" Brett demands Mackey 

"Brett you're so blind, Y/n is so into you!" Stella says, blurring out, "She left because she didn't want you to press her into talking to you about it. She didn't want you to see her any different if she told you. Let alone questioning if you like girls and you're beginning to go with hot-shot Grainger over there, so she wanted to get her mind off of her emotions." 

Brett stands there, dumbfounded. Why didn't you tell her. 

"Stella!" You call into your walkie 

"Y/n?" Stella calls back 

"On your six!" You say, smiling, "can't stay away." 

She runs up to you and gives you a big bear hug. 

"Listen up 51, I'm no commanding officer but I do sure know the place on the back of my hand. Captain Casey and Chief Boden... With your permission may I give the orders?" You ask through the walkie 

"Yes ma'am," Casey answers 

"What's your plan Y/l/n?" Chief Boden asks

"Okay, I scouted the perimeter and there's only, assuming they're away from the windows. Squad 3 you take the Northside, you try to get CPD officers into the building to clear the field for you. Engine 51, to Grainger with any room you have, get your hoses ready should any form of fire start. Truck 81, if shots are fired, move in, get as many civilians out as you can. I'll move in with you guys and give extra arms to help." You announce 

You take a giant breath as you finish out your speech. Stella, Brett and Mackey look at you in awe as you've never taken initiative before. 

"Y/l/n, I thought I have you on vacation," Boden comes up to you, "And you're not usually one to give orders." 

"Apparently can't stay away sir," you sigh, adjusting your belt, "And I know this place all too well." 

"Very well Y/l/n," Boden smiles, "You heard the lady men." 

You watch Squad 3 and follow Truck 81 as you meet up with Burgess and Ruzek. 

"You're gonna need this," Burgess heads you a 9 milimeter 

"Thanks..." you say, taking it and concealing it 

You hear screaming and gunshots. And hear a blaze begin. 

"Grainger fire! I don't know where it is! Find it!" You demand 

"You got it kid," he says 

"Move in!" The muffled walkie screams as you, along with 81, Burgess, Ruzek and many other CPD officers barge into the building, ringing shots, killing nearly all the perpetrators. 

"Hey kiddo it's okay it's okay," you tell her, checking for any signs of injury 

"Y/l/n!" Kim yells, you immediately shield the kid as a shot rings out 

You let out a strangled scream as your arm is bleeding; a severe gunshot wound. It didn't go into your skin and damage your bone however, the bullet made a real "good" indent in your skin as it rang out. Kim pulls the trigger on her glock 17 and kills the guy immediately. Kim helps you cover your wound as you still hold onto the kid, hoping any parental unit would claim her. 

"Mommy," the girl cries 

You turn over and see the mom, on the ground. You hand the kid over to Kim as you go to help Severide and Casey. You all get her onto the board to get her to 61. 

"Brett, Mackey need the Ambo ready," you speak into your walkie 

"Hey Burgess, you can let the girl into the ambo," you say as she helps the little girl into the back 

"Aren't you coming with us?" Brett asks 

"Can't, I have to take my sisters' power boat back across Lake Michigan," you sigh, "My sister is a doctor over at her local hospital, I'll drive myself over there." 

"You're gonna bleed out, you need to get to med," Brett demands, calmly 

"I can take care of myself Brett, don't worry about me I'll be fine." You say, trying to walk away 

"Y/n!" Brett yells your first name

You never heard Brett call you by your first name. You shake it off before settling back to your stoic self.

"Let me go, please," you say calmly, "I'm only gone for a month." 

"Did you tell Stella and Mackey to lie to me?" She asks you 

"I didn't want you worrying about me," you sigh, "Besides, I'm going to be fine." 

She lets go of you as you walk back to your sisters boat. She felt tears welding into her eyes. 

"Brett, we gotta go," Mackey calls out 

Mackey shuts the doors as Brett hops into the driver's seat and activates the sirens. 

You arrive to your sisters workplace as a nurse rushes over to you. 

"What happened?!" She asks 

"Zoomed across Lake Michigan and helped my firehouse, but unfortunately I got grazed," you sigh 

"Y/n?!" Your sister calls out to you, "oh my god Y/n you took my power boat?!" 

You nod, "They needed my help." 

"You have never changed," she laughs, "I can check you out."

Once your sister had stitched up your wound she discharged you from the hospital. Once you get back to your sisters place, you open your Chicago news app. The first article that comes up is the one from earlier. 

"Firehouse 51 paramedic makes a chief-status plan while on this call today," The news reporter says, "According to 51s' Captain Matt Casey, it was an astounding plan. Girl's a hero." 

You sigh as you don't really feel like a hero, just another day as a paramedic.

Your sister comes home late at night however, doesn't find you anywhere. 

"Called Chief Boden and told him I changed my mind on my one month vacation, I'm heading back to 51 right now." Your sister read aloud, "Bought you something that’s in the fridge for taking care of me for a short time."

You park your motorcycle in one of the street parking slots as you keep your helmet on for secrecy. Without knowing it was you, Brett walks past you. Once you get to your locker, you try to make a quick haste to get yourself ready. 

"In a rush?" Stella smiles 

She comes up to you and gives you a big bear hug. 

"Missed you kid," she smiles 

Before you could say anything else you hear arguing from afar. You and Stella go to the garage and notice Brett and Grainger arguing. 

"So you led me on?" He asks 

"Not exactly, I wasn't aware of Quinn's feelings and I wasn't sure how to process it," Brett starts, "I just-" 

"Just what Sylvie?" He asks, angrily 

You notice she's beginning to falter. 

"Y/n left, and for what?" He asks her, "She isn't a Lieutenant, Captain, or Chief! What makes her so special?! I don't think you made the right choice of making her on your paramedic team. How are YOU even the paramedic-in-charge?" 

You've had enough, "HEY!" 

They both turn to you, Brett almost crying years of joy. You place a gentle hand onto her shoulder, reassuring her that you'll settle this. 

"You have NO RIGHT to question her position as Paramedic-in-Charge Mr. Hot shot Lieutenant." You spat in his face 

He was about to open his mouth to say something else, but closes it when you give him the look of: 'oh I'm not done mister!'. 

"She’s one of the GREATEST PICs I have ever worked with in my years of being in the Fire Department service. She’s one of the VERY few, that I am honored to be working with, one I come to know and love." You continue, "You question that position? And for what? The most beautiful Paramedic is beginning to question herself and what SHE wants? No, one should always be supportive. No matter what, you should leave my guy." 

"Hate to tell you rookie, I'm not leaving yet," he tries to sound smug 

"Oh you're leaving alright buddy," Hermann says, walking into the firehouse 

He doesn't say anything else but give you one last look of disgust before leaving. You let out a breath of relief. Stella and Mackey applaud for you. 

"You stood up for me?" Brett asks, looks at you, "Don't you hate me for hurting you?" 

"Brett," you smile, "I never did hate you. I left so I could clear my head." 

She smiles as she hugs you, "my god oh how I've missed you." 

Your head drops down and rests on Brett's shoulder for your head to be cradled. 

"I'm sorry Sylvs," you call her by her nickname, "You remember how I used to act... I didn't want that happening again." 

"You could've just talked to me love," Brett whispers

After shift you head over to Molly's with Stella. 

"How's your arm kid?" She asks 

"Hurts but my sister stair to be careful, and then just have someone at med undo the stitches." You say 

"That's good, that's good," Stella states, "You know, Brett was worried sick on that call this morning." 

"Really?" You ask, leaning in towards Stella 

"Speak of the Devil, there she is," Stella smiles, waving her over 

"You look great Quinn," Brett smiles 

"You look beautiful Sylvs," you smile back, sipping your whiskey 

Stella looks at you, a look you know too well. That says, "go get your girl!" 

You make fun if her look and then turn your attention to Brett. 

"So Brett, how you been doing the last couple of days?" You ask 

"Worrying about you," she sighs 

You nearly choke on your drink as that though has never crossed your mind. You only thought that Sylvie had eyes for Grainger. Of all people, she worries about you.

“Really?” You ask, clearing your throat, “Why’s that?”

“you didn’t talk to me before heading off to your sister’s,” She says, “Also for telling Stella and Mackey to lie to me.”

“I didn’t want you to worry about me,” You say, “I wasn’t about to have my emotions get the best of me again.”

“You remember last time?” Sylvie asks

“Of course I do,” You say

“Do you want to get out of here?” Sylvie asks, “I know you don’t want that kind of thing to be talked about in public.”

“Sure,” You smile

You get a glance at Stella and she gives you a face of ‘go get your woman girl!’

Once the both of you reach your apartment, you follow Sylvie into hers.

“Remember that time I helped you calm down?” She finally asks

You nod, “I never did.”

“As soon as I touched you, you instantly calmed down,” She explains, “So, if what happened between us the other night affected your emotions, how come you didn’t tell me sooner?”

“Because I wasn’t sure if you were also into girls,” You confess, “You’re THE Sylvie Brett, one of the greatest people I’ve come to know and love in my life. And I’m just... Me... A paramedic with anger issues.”

“And I love you,” Sylvie confesses

Realizing what she had just said to you made her cheeks heat up. You look at her the same way. You gently press her against the doorframe to her room and place your lips along hers, building that inferno in your heart that burns for her.

#chicago fire #one chicago #sylvie brett x reader #sylvie brett #female reader #gianna mackey #stella kidd #one chicago spoilers #one chicago x reader