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incorrectmerlinquotes · 5 hours ago
Gwaine: Hey, Lancelot! How do you play Cops and Robbers?
Lancelot: What's that in your hand?
[police sirens wail in the distance]
Gwaine: Come on, I really need to know. For science.
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incorrect-sbi · 5 hours ago
tubbo: i told philza to chill and he said ‘i am chill’ and i said ‘i thought you were philza’
tubbo: i just dad-joked phil! i’m the revolution!
phil: hi revolution, i’m phil
tubbo: a bitter defeat.
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junewolfpens · 16 hours ago
Before I die, i want to be somebody’s favourite hiding place, the place they can put everything they know they need to survive, every secret, every solitude, every nervous prayer, and be absolutely certain I will keep it safe. I will keep it safe.
- Andrea Gibson
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Stephen: Wait, do you seriously have a mirror facing the foot of your bed? Aren't you scared that the mirror dimension you is going to crawl out of it in the middle of the night and kill you?
Tony: ... What kind of lives do you people lead?
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wrongmha · 3 hours ago
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Monoma: I curse god. Shiozaki: Which god? Monoma: You know which fucking god.
Source: Tumblr
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f1incorrects · 8 hours ago
Daniel: So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Lance recently.
Max: No, Dan, it's not what it looks like, I swear.
Daniel: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?
Max: No! You’re the only one for me.
Daniel: Is that so?
Max: I promise! Lance and I are just dating, okay? He’s my partner.
Daniel: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?
Max: You are still my one and only best friend! He’s just the love of my life, nothing more!
Daniel: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?
Max: Of course bro!
Daniel: Bro...
Lance: What the-
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ninasdrafts · 4 hours ago
In the middle of the night I open my eyes and turn on the lights, draw my knees up to my chest and stare at the ceiling, thinking, "is this all? Is this what I've been waiting for? What I've been fighting for?" And for a moment it all seems so pointless. Me and you and the distance between us, the job I applied for out of necessity, not out of passion, the way I'm wasting away here in a house that's never felt like home, with the blue light of the TV drowning out my thoughts. Lately these doubts have been creeping up on me more often and while I should be keeping my eyes on the road ahead, I'm busy staring down the roads I did not take. Did I make the right decisions? In staying, in leaving, in leaving you behind? In pretending I did not care, did not know, did not see? I'm just wondering: if I'd done one thing differently, where would I be now? Someplace far away with someone I never met because I prevented our paths from crossing? I stare at the ceiling and think about how the universe is so ridiculously big and we are so so small and yet every single decision we make seems monumental. It scares me, yes. But it also brings me some sense of relief. Because if there are some things I want to change, I just have to get out of bed in the morning and do it. Be brave. Be open. And forget about the roads I did not take - I decided against them for a reason, even if I can't recall it right now. So I turn off the lights and dream of better times. Of you. And of me. And of all the roads there are still to take.
the roads not taken / n.j.
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aquamarinescarlet · an hour ago
Wanda: It's always the same. I never know what to wear.
Y/n: It must be so hard for you, Wan. I mean, having to decide whether to wear the black emo dress, the black emo dress, or... the black emo dress.
Wanda: Exactly.
Y/n: I know, why don't you wear the black emo dress?
Wanda: Good idea. Thanks, babe.
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Plo: Reminder that taking care of yourself has no set times.
Plo: Shower at 3am
Plo: Eat breakfast at 2pm
Plo: Brush your teeth at 5pm
Plo: It doesn't matter. Just take care of yourself in YOUR time.
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the-black-bulls · 8 hours ago
Yami: It's so frustrating!
Charlotte: What?
Yami: How Noelle keeps dropping such obvious hints that she's into Asta, but Asta is completely oblivious to it.
Charlotte, wearing a shirt saying "PLEASE DATE ME YAMI": Yeah. Very frustrating indeed.
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f1incorrects · 2 hours ago
[Lando and Lance somehow glued together]
Lance: Wait a minute, how did this happen? We're smarter than this!
Lando: Apparently, we're not.
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rwbybutincorrect · 21 minutes ago
Sun: As your best friend-
Blake: I don’t have friends.
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love--and-rain · 46 minutes ago
Semen Borisov
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“Don’t believe what your eyes are telling you. All they show is limitation. Look with your understanding. Find out what you already know and you will see the way to fly.” ― Richard Bach, Jonathan Livingston Seagull
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poulamis-world · 7 hours ago
Draco 'forever nocturnal' Malfoy reading The Daily Prophet at 2 am : Merlin! A woman in London strangled her husband to death for annoying her. Can you imagine just snapping like that?
Hermione Trying to sleep next to him: Yes.
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