Ra's Al Ghul has a specific, unique strain of tea grown in his compound. it doesn't have any special qualities, it's just been bred over hundreds of years to appeal to his specific tastes, and - when you know what to look for - is unmistakable.
In Bruce's first month back in Gotham, a package of that same tea found itself on his doorstep, with no sign of any delivery person. while he had never been a fan, Alfred was much more receptive, and so the packages kept arriving, every month.
Some of my favorite Batman character sketches by artist Dennis Culver from 2010.
Alfred Pennyworth ☕️, Harvey Dent 🪙, Killer Croc 🐊, Harley Quinn ♠️♥️, The Scarecrow 🧪, Egghead 🍳, Ra’s al Ghul 👿, Harvey Bullock 🍩, and Black Mask 💀!
First appearance of Ra’s al Ghul.
[from Batman (1940) #232]
Yandere Batfam (and their fellow villains/rivals) Headcanons
- He is one paranoid fucker. As soon as he feels any sort of attraction to you, he’s researching you the fuck up. Your background, your history, who you’ve been in contact with for the past decade. Everything there is to know, he will know. It can’t be helped. The last couple of women he’s been with were violent and morally ambiguous. Hell, we all saw what happened with Talia. He doesn’t want to let his guard down. It’s a dangerous world for a man like him to fall in love so desperately that all he wants to do is carve out his own heart and give it to you.
- He is highly manipulative and obsessive. Obsessive, in the sense that he will be stalking you 24/7. He wants to know absolutely everything there is to know about you: your favourite hobbies, the food you like, that one drink you keep ordering from that cafe down your workplace/university. And he’s manipulative in the sense that once you’re his or once he’s embedded himself into your life, he will be using as many psychological tools and tactics to get you falling in love with him. Pavlov’s theory of classical conditioning is one of his favourites. Just like Pavlov managed to get a dog to associate food with the sound of a bell ringing, he’ll have you associating himself with anything you adore.
- On that note, he is insanely protective, too. He knows just how bad this world is and will do whatever it takes to keep you safe. And he’s paranoid that something might take you out of this world. He’s been through enough deaths in the family that not feeling any sort of desire to lock you up and hide you from this rotten world would be abnormal. Of course, he doesn’t, because he respects you as a human and wants your willing consent. By locking you up, he’s no better than those villains and crooks he beats up every night. But the thought is there. It always is.
- Constantly tries to impress you. Very dramatic when it comes to interacting you or uh, as Damian puts it, “courting” you. Can dial it up from 10 to 306 in a matter of seconds.
- Has a constant need for attention. Can and will chat your ear off. He likes being your everything all the time. If your attention so much as leaves him for more than 5 seconds, he is not going to be happy. Focus on him and only him. If it’s for work related reasons, fiiine, he’ll accept it (begrudgingly) but if it’s because some asshole butted in and stole your attention, yeah it’s not going to work. He’ll take it as a competition and keep stealing back your attention, doing stupid and crazy shit in order to get you focusing on him alone. He’ll either do some insane acrobatic move or he’ll act like a total baby, huffing and puffing until you get annoyed and turn back to him. Good attention, bad attention. It doesn’t matter as long as it’s attention.
- Like all the batfam members, he’s hecking obsessive. They all want to know everything about you but compared to the others, Dick isn’t that bad. It’s still really bad but Bruce and Tim can take it to a whole ‘nother level that even the devil himself would be morbidly impressed and disgusted. He wants to know everything about you and will be tracking your location 24/7, the messages you send, the links you copy into google, everything.
- Is quite the charmer. There are a few of the batfam who take a more productive and active approach into seducing you into their lives and Dick is one of the main ones. He plans, of course, once he realises he wants you in his life - Bruce would be ashamed if he didn’t, and he’d never hear the end of it from his brothers (especially Tim) who’d be judging him considerably for not planning anything - but he’s quick to slide on in into your life. He likes to go with the flow a lot so he’ll sort out a ‘meeting’ scenario but other than that, whatever goes, goes. He’s a quick-thinker and can act without the need for a well-thought out plan (unlike Tim).
- Jason’s been replaced all his life. After his death, he was replaced not once, but twice. He’s got some sort of paranoia when it comes to his darling. He fears that he might be replaced because he’s “not good enough”. Dick’s the nice, compassionate one. The golden boy. Tim’s the smart one and Damian’s the biological son. So what’s he? The defective Robin? The broken one? He doesn’t constantly try to prove himself worthy of your attention because he, as the great Klaus Hargeeves once said, “has this self esteem issue where he hates himself but still thinks he’s better than everyone else”, but it’d be nice if you notice things about him.
- That being said, if you accept him, he will be absolutely over the moon but really really insecure about himself. He’d constantly compare himself to his brothers in his head, have these conflicting thoughts that maybe he isn’t treating you right— but will also refuse any sort of idea that so much as suggests to let you go. You keep him sane in this maddening world. You’re not leaving him.
- If you reject him, it’s not going to bode well for you. He’s going to kidnap you — it’s just too dangerous and he has a lot of enemies, y’know. It’s kinda for your own good — but he ain’t gonna be mean about it. You’ve got free reign to everything in his safe house (like hell is he taking you to a shabby, rundown one) but you’ll find that the windows are thick enough to be bulletproof, there’s a thousand security measures to ensure you’re trapped inside and oh, would you look at that...cameras everywhere you go — you could probably get him to take those down after a while (but they’ll just be smaller and hidden more into the corners of the ceiling. It’s for your own safety.
- That being said, he’s still a creep, no matter how cute. While stalking you, he’d want to be surrounded by you. He’d sit on your bed when you’re not around, smell your sheets, cuddle with your pillows and toys. He’s like your own protective bodyguard (guard dog). He’s by your side constantly, arm around your waist, big muscular frame intimidating everyone around you. But he’ll treat you with the utmost care.
- Timothy fucking Drake, my man. As you can probably tell, Tim is one of my favourite yanderes. He’s not jacked and old like how I typically like my men but there’s just something about him that I adore. I can tell you what in these massively long headcannons I’m about to dish out for him (you can tell he’s my fave just by how much effort I’m putting into him):
- This poor bb came from a neglectful home and he thrived to prove himself as useful to everyone around him. He neglects his own basic human necessities in order to be of help to others around him. He fears being replaceable. He worked his ass off during his training so that he could help other people, so that he could be needed. He fears being thrown away. So when someone (his darling) shows him any sort of affection or whatever, he will latch on. And he is so full of paranoia that he gets obsessive over them and what they’re doing, who they’re hanging out with, etc. He gets nervous that he’s replaceable so he constantly tries to prove himself as valuable. In doing so, I mean, he keeps showing up in front of you with whatever you need.
- “Oh, you’re on your period? Don’t worry! I’ve got pads!” or “Oh! You need lip balm? I just bought a new one. Here you can have it!” He also gets very jealous and paranoid that his brothers will take you away. Also, one tip to get him to fall head over heels for you: tell him this, "Aren't you making yourself suffer too much? If you're tired, it's okay to say you're tired. It's okay to cry when you're sad and vent when you're angry. Don't be scared of expressing your emotions. No matter what, I'll always be here to support you."
- Heck, you can say that to all the boys and they’ll fall for you. Dude’s been bottling up his emotions since forever. He fears that by expressing his emotions, it reduces his value as the “smart robin”. The smart one has to be cool and collected all the time, in order to pick up the slack from the other brothers. Like Bruce, his paranoia snaps immediately the minute you show any niceness to him. He wants to find out the reason, who you are, what type of person you are. In the beginning, it was just to calm his paranoia. He has a lot of enemies, both as Red Robin and Tim Drake, being the son of billionaire Bruce Wayne and all. He has to be careful. But after a while, he keeps denying it but there’s an underlying prod in his brain that he’s doing it more so because he’s gotten obsessed with you. So obsessed that he wants to find out everything about you. He’s a detective like that. Tim has a very very secured and encrypted file on his laptop that he spends hours editing and adding to. It’s a file just for you. Full of photos, videos, and documents on different aspects of you. He uses all of these in order to instigate conversations and to portray himself as a suitable lover.
- For example, he’s got a doc on your food preferences, a doc on your anime preferences. In the latter, he’s got photos and videos of your reactions to certain episodes, scenes that bring out different emotions.
- Unlike the others, Tim is most definitely the last one to enter your life. He’s too nervous, too afraid. He’s like an Ayano Aishi, the moment he tries to even stand next to you, he’s getting all flustered up and heated and he’ll have to flee if he doesn’t want to look stupid in front of you.
- Tim plans out everything from scratch. He’ll have your first meeting detailed and planned out, your first chat, your first kiss, your first date, the first time you’ll hold hands, the first time you’ll seek him out, etc — these are all documented with all the existing data Tim has on you. If you are an iseaki person who knows about the yanderes, their personalities because you used to simp for them and have fallen into their world, trying to collect them all (which is my favourite trope for DC yandere fics), you can fuck up the plan all you want. Introduce Tim to a world outside of his thought-out plans and details and he’ll fall for you even more, especially if you take his “fault” of planning so much and think of it positively and not as something disgusting.
- Tim is a total stalker. His world consists of two things: Red Robin and you. If you ask him what his prorities are, he’ll be in conflict because both you and the cowl mean a lot to him, but he’s always got his eye on you one way or another. If he’s too busy to watch the practically invisible security cameras he’s put up all over your apartment/house, then he’ll be making sure he’s got your gps somewhere so he can make sure you’re staying at home.
- If you do leave home and he’s got the free time to swing by and see what you’re up to, he will. If not, he’ll be a bit peeved and upset because he can’t see what you’re doing and it annoys him because oh my god. What if some pervert comes up to you and gropes you? Assaults you? What if he can’t be there to protect you if the Riddler somehow decides you’re going to be that one hostage he needs in a mall of thousands of potential others.
- Silent and Deadly 2.0.
- She’s a silent stalker. You won’t even notice her. She doesn’t jot down any information or take any photos to tuck away in her pocket for whatever nightly purposes. She simply watches. Mentally taking note of your every movement and how you react to certain things.
- She likes to bring you things to see your reactions. She takes great joy in how you react to things. Only when you react positively. She hates it if you react negatively and if your movements become saddened or whatever, and she’ll make it her problem to ensure you go back to being happy and positive. If it’s a guy who’s getting too close to comfort, the dude’s arm is broken and tossed to the side as Black Bat drops down from the rooftop to offer you a chaperone home
- She’s also a silent protector type. She, like Tim, don’t immediately interact with you or embed themselves into your life. They watch, observe and keep you safe from the sidelines. But Cass may just enter your life by saving you as Blackbat and then, with that, she’ll be able to stop by every now and then to see you. If you’re walking home late at night and she can see you’re scared, she’ll drop down from the rooftop or gargoyle she’s perched on to walk you to wherever you need to be.
- “You look...scared. I’ll walk with you.”
- She doesn’t speak much, you notice, but she’s safe to be around and makes you feel so comfortable. Soon, it becomes a regular thing for the Blackbat to be around you, but be warned, whichever fool tries to get their hands on you thinking you’re her weakness (rightly so), she will rain hell on them and the ‘no kill’ rule might just be bent a little. It’s not her problem if they die from blood loss while she’s too busy fretting over you.
- She doesn’t seem like it but she’s quite the worry-wart. She cares a lot about you and doesn’t like when you’re upset or the vibes your body language gives off are negative. So she’ll do anything and everything in her power to change it.
- Just like Tim, Damian came from a terribly abusive family so he developed a fear of being replaceable. He constantly strives to prove himself useful, because in the League, that’s the only way he would be accepted. Thus, with his darling, he keeps trying to prove his use, but his, uh, personality is kinda hard to deal with. You’ll get spiteful comments as he hands you a glass of water, calls you a fool for tripping on your own two feet in the park while cleaning the wound, etc. Y’know...nice but Damian style.
- A stalker. In order to be able to prove himself, he must first understand you and in order to do that, he has to stalk you. He doesn’t necessarily record everything down like Tim would do.
- Will spend time observing you and drawing you. He finds you to be the best reference for a beautiful portrait of a beautiful woman.
- Will steal your shit.
- Like his mother and grandfather, he has quite the traditional view of “courtship”. Once he’s integrated himself into your life, he’ll be doing everything to prove to you that he is the best you will ever find. He’ll work hard on himself and you can find that your moral compass and your ideals will greatly affect his own so if you’ve got a perchant for not caring if a murderer gets killed and that you believe that the Red Hood’s method of ‘getting rid of bad guys’ is better than Batman’s — oh boy oh boy oh boy, Robin’s kill streak (which had previously been frozen, courtesy of Dick and Bruce) will be rising all over again. If that’s your view point, Talia might just be more accepting of you because good, Damian now has the potential to lead the League of Assassins again.
- As soon as your friendship period is over and you’ve gotten a good year or two together, it’ll be time for the courtship phase where he will do everything in his power to get you to like him. He and the rest of the al Ghul family, as well as mostly all of the other yanderes, believe that gifts are one of the best way to show interest in you. They like getting you gifts that will draw pleasant and excited reactions from you. They like getting you a gift knowing full well you wanted this but didn’t have the finance to afford it. This is where the stalking comes in hand.
- If you’re a die-hard weeb like me, Damian won’t exactly be invested in your likes but he won’t judge them. He sees no fault in you and only sees your interest in Japanese fiction as a way to further your interest of himself. If you see he knows about anime, you might just like him more.
Bruce Wayne’s Villain: Talia al Ghul
- Talia al Ghul is a woman of luxury and wealth and fine taste, and, of course, her darling must be surrounded by such things, too. I could go on about how she’d treat you, but first, let me tell you how she found you.
- There’s no way Talia al Ghul would just choose her beloved right from the streets. There has to be something that spurred this obsession - the same goes for all the other villains. There’s no way they’d just fall for a random civillian. They wouldn’t have even noticed you if it weren’t for their batfam counterparts.
- Talia has an unhealthy and kind of toxic devotion to her son and to her first beloved, Bruce. He was worthy of siring the Demon’s Heir and he is worthy of being her lover - if only his moral compass wasn’t so upright and so stubbornly stuck. It is because of this devotion that she constantly monitors (through the many assassins she’s dispatched to Gotham) his every move and actions. It’s subtle, barely even there and as long as no assassins make it their personal mission to follow him but to live a ‘normal gothamite life’ and record any Batman sightings, fights, etc, then Bruce won’t notice them.
- Which, as of lately, was weird because Bruce seems...distracted. Talia had entered Gotham and it had taken much longer than normal for him to approach her. This was the first red flag. The second was his unusual hostility, almost as if he was hiding something. And two red flags were all that was needed before she took it upon herself to research what exactly he was hiding: you.
- Talia didn’t approach you, didn’t do anything that would catch Bruce’s attention. She just observed you from a distance (thirty feet away from Bruce at all times, of course). At first, she didn’t understand Bruce’s...Bruce’s obssession(!) with you. You were nothing, just a random civillian he must’ve picked up from the sewers. You were nothing like her. Why would he pick you over Talia al Ghul herself? What did you have over her? You had no status, no wealth, no army to control or any of her skills and intellect. You couldn’t even compare to her. So why did he pick you?
- What Talia did not know, was that this jealousy spurred an obsession to uncover everything about you. Maybe you were a secret agent? Maybe you were a highly trained assassin from an organisation Talia hadn’t heard about? Maybe you were so skilled that you could easily blend in and even fool the Batman, the greatest detective!
- In the end, it only lead to her utter disbelief at her foolishness and obsession with Bruce himeslf. It horrified her, how deeply invested she got into you, and she departed from Gotham immediately. The days, the weeks, the months she spent away from Gotham, she couldn’t stop thinking about you. About the way your smile shone so brightly in the thick smog of Gotham, about the way you so cutely shed tears watching some random cartoons about pirates and ninjas, about the way you were everything so pure in a world of darkness and plagues.
- And in those following months away from you, she realised just why Bruce had fallen so hard for you. You were a getaway, a world away from the lonliness, the deaths, the destruction, the everything! You were the world’s innocence personified.
- And she, too, fell hard.
- Like all al Ghuls, she takes courtship to another level. She will enter your life mundanely, throwing Bruce completely off guard. It’ll be so random, like bumping into a stranger on the street and them getting their drink on you, profusely apologising and treating them to another.
- As soon as she’s gone from your line of sight, Bruce is all over her, threatening her with such hostility she thinks for a second he might kill her. He promises that if she so much as does anything to you, he’ll--
- “Relax, beloved, you are not the only who can fall for a mere civilian.”
- Of course, it takes a lot to convince Bruce of Talia’s genuinity and his obsessive stalking and ‘protecting’ is doubled, if not trippled when he has the free time.
- When she recalls your Arab heritage (because my DC reader will always be Arab), she falls even harder and tries to appeal to that ethnic part of you. Oh, you like Za’atar and can’t find it in Gotham because no one likes the herb? No problem! Talia will be shipping so many buckets of it from its country of origin all the way to your apartment - speaking of that apartment, “Beloved, don’t you think you should move? It’s dangerous to be here and I really don’t want you getting hurt by a simple burglar.”
- As if it’s dangerous wherever you go. What a complete load of bull. It’s never dangerous, not when you’ve got Batman high-tailing you ten ways to Sunday and a series of protective ninja bodyguards constantly watching you.
Dick Grayson’s Villain: Slade Wilson/Deathstroke
- Oh man, oh man, oh man. You do not know the things I will let this man do to me. Slade Wilson is also one of my favourite yanderes to ever exist and I love him to death. Dilf, jacked body, huge muscles, the ability to probably be able to rip a car in half Hulk-style. What more could you love? Oh wait, his personality.
- Like all other villains, it takes the heroes getting obsessed with you for them to find out about you. Dick was distracted during one of their ‘dates’, which is basically Slade’s title of when he has a target in Gotham or Bludhaven (one he purposefully took for this sole intention) and wants Dick to come catch and foil it - though, most of the time, that never happens, but some of the times, it’s because Deathstroke gets a bit too distracted by Nightwing’s most prominent ‘ass-et’.
- Dick wasn’t fighting or aiming to uncover Slade’s little gifts (puzzles to his whereabouts or potential target - man imagine being so strong and powerful that you could play with people’s lives like they were dolls) with the usual prominence or emphasis he normally would, and Slade wasn’t taking kindly to that. It took a week or two but he finally found the cause: you.
- He didn’t strike immediately, too bit of a sadist to outright take you, but he did observe you meticulously. He aimed to uncover all your secrets and just why Dick liked you, your routine, your job, skills, etc, but along the way, he subconsiously started noting down things you liked, hobbies you partook in, the kind of food and drinks you enjoyed, etc. His intention was to snatch you away under Dick’s nose and watch the boy fret in desperation and dispair while he held you hostage - he wanted to play it off as a new, terrifying and dangerous villain that found his latest weakness and that would force Dick to come to him for help in ‘finding you’.
- But then, just like that kid, you grew on him and bada bing bada boom, once Slade knows he wants something, he’s going to take it, and what he wants right now is you and Dick. He doesn’t go about his seduction the same way he goes about Dick, he slots himself into your life as the older, sauve man who offers you good advice when you’re at the exquisite pub you frequent to get away from all the drunkards and the slums. It’s a pub for rich people and if he didn’t know better, he’d think you’re looking for a sugar daddy-- well, you aren’t, but the friend beside you sure is, and all it takes is good light-hearted conversations, a good reputation and gentle but sauave auroma and he’s got your friend going gaga over him, urging you to take the man on his offer to become his sugar baby.
- And boy will he make it worthwhile if you do accept.
- He doesn’t pressure you into anything but he’s a bit of a sadist. He likes seeing Dick’s expression off in the distance where he’s no doubt stalking you when he sees you walking beside the Deathstroke. He likes seeing the anger, the shock and the pure fury that explodes on Dick’s face whenever he shows up around you and when he asked you to be his sugar baby-- oh, he wished he could have recorded Dick’s reaction. It was *chef’s kiss* spectacular.
- He’ll learn your kinks and preferences to the T and will match them up. He’s a soft guy by nature, a bit of a begrudging teddy bear on the inside (only to you) and he likes affection. To Dick, he likes giving the kid a ruffle to his hair to see his annoyed reaction, but to you, he likes seeing you light up with happiness and excitement whenever you see him and he likes getting you to blush so furiously that your heart starts running a mile a minute.
- He’s one heck of a tease and does everything in order to get a reaction out of the both of you, but once he learns that you don’t like it rough (*cough* unlike a certain bird *cough*), he’s not doing anything horrible to you. But that’s only if you accept him. If you don’t? Well, he’s not against kidnapping you and reeducating you.
Tim Drake’s Villain: Ra’s al Ghul
- This man-- oh, god, the things this man does to me. Ra’s al Ghul has to be my favourite yandere ever. He is! Hands down, he is. I love him to death and back and god, the things I’d let him do to me.
- A lot of people have this view of him that he’s the worst man on earth to have as a yandere, but I disagree. I think he’d be the best yandere to have in the world, or, at least, from the way I view him, he is. He would take great care of you, indulge you with whatever your heart desires. Sure, he’ll be horrible to everyone around you, but hey-- It’s Ra’s al Ghul. Whoever said he was a good person?
- Ra’s’ obsession spurred from Tim’s obsession of you. He only learnt about you because of Tim, found that Tim’s obsession with you was an unncessary distraction to his growth and potential, but then he thought about it a little more and slowly started to think, ‘Maybe there was more to you than what meets the eye?’ So he searched into you, trying to discern whether you were some new villain with great skills of disguise, whether you were part of an organisation that was able to masterfully create new identities from scratch and make it look so realistic. But, in the end, all that he found was that you and Timothy shared the same likes and interests and you had met and helped him once and he fell. Hard.
- He meant to take you, to have you killed off, but then, once again, he thought a little more and seeing Tim’s drive in worshipping you, unrealistically but also kind of realistically speaking, maybe you could be useful, after all. He started conjuring plans, schemes with you at the centre and Tim’s growth and potential at the core. He wondered if he could push Tim’s inherited ‘no kill’ rule if you were in dangerous. He wondered if Tim would consider letting hundreds of innocent civillians die if it meant that you were saved. He wondered about the things Tim would do to try to get Ra’s to bring you back to life using the Pits.
- Oh, he wondered and wondered and wondered, mused for days on end, schemed and scehemed and schemed-- until...until he sort of (kind of foolishly) fell for you, too. There was just something about you, your youth, your innocence, something that Tim could not replicate that he found oh so endearing, and like the man he is, when he wanted something, he would do absolutely anything necessary to take it.
- So, of course, he does not enter your life smoothly like the others. No, he is much too busy for that. Instead, he kidnaps you. He kidnaps you and keeps you away from Tim (because he needs time to break you in and get you to see things his way before Tim came in and spoilt everything) and all to himself.
- He doesn’t mean you any harm, does not keep you in a cage (even though it kind of is). He takes you to his headquarters, gives you an extravagant room fit for an Arab princess with lanterns and drapes and gold everywhere. He treats you well, promises you riches and wealth beyond your wildest dreams and gives you a taste of the luxuries he will offer you if you just accept him.
- He gives you free reign of the headquarters, letting you roam and explore as you please (he did so dearly love his curious, little beloveds) with only a guard watching you from the shadows. He indulges you with whatever demands and desires you have, never once getting angered or irritated by the spoilt persona you tried to put up in an attempt to dissuade Ra’s’ interest from you-- Oh, how alike you and Timothy are, cleverly trying to dissuade and distract him from how worthy you are of his affections and interest.
- But your plans don’t work, of course, because Ra’s likes his beloveds spoilt -- Well, only you. Timothy does a great job testing Ra’s patience that he has to be disciplined a little before he can be spoilt. But you? Oh, how he adores you to death. You know when to reel in your emotions and anger and know when to play your cards oh so well. You don’t test the unspoken boundaries he has put up between you and his work. You do not try to persuade him to start using his army of assassins for ‘good’, you do not try to stop or ambush any of his genocidal plans (in fear of your own safety, of course). You are such a good beloved.
- In return, he does not harm your family or the friends you hold dear. He does not take away the luxuries and privleges he has given you and indulges you in everything you desire. If you wish to leave the safety of his humble abode, he will allow it. You are safe anywhere because there will always be members of the league of assassins following your every move and guarding you. They may be in the shadows or they may even be the barista at the local coffee shop you visit every so often. They are always around to keep an eye on you.
- And, of course, Ra’s has access to all the documents Timothy has of you.
- Silent and Deadly, the first.
- Lady Shiva is quite the hard yandere to pin down. The only way she gets interested in things if there’s a new fighting technique or a battle that may result in dying. She likes a challenge, likes the idea of dancing between the line of life and death. So there’s nothing about you, a random civilian who holds no special ability to kill, no skills to fight or defend yourself either, that will catch her interest at all.
- And you know what? Maybe that’s the reason. She just finds you one day, all full of bravery and valour as you try to cleverly mouth your way out of a dangerous situation. She likes your talk, likes that you’re all bark and no bite. You’re a bit of a delinquent here-- well, judging from the fact that you lived in Gotham, it’s only a given. You don’t fight, you don’t kill, you’re just really clever and she likes that. You’ve got the brains to back up your bark, distracting oncomers and villains just enough to help people out. You think before you do things and use your intuition to help you out in your dire moments-- and it works, surprisingly enough.
- She happened to come across you whilst searching for Batman. The Riddler had escaped Arkham Asylum and going crazy with his puzzles, tricks and schemes, all in an attempt to lure and best the Batman (which would never happen at all, unless Shiva’s opinion about him had been a lie-- which was never). Lady Shiva was waiting in the sidelines to observe how Batman and his latest sidekick, the Blackbat worked. You were one of the few hostages he had and you clever little thing, you managed to work out an arguement out of him, inevitably distracting him with well-timed quips and phrases. You never angered him or retaliated his words with frustration. It was like you were trying to calm down an aggressive dog, and it worked. You started a conversation up about literature, Shakespeare’s Othello, like you were asking about the weather in a coffee shop and not being held hostage by a homicidal maniac.
- You managed to distract the fool long enough to be saved by the Bat and his sidekick. You were thanked for your help and oh-- the way you flushed with such a lovely shade of red as you shyly looked away and mumbled an incoherent “thanks”. Shiva found that she quite liked you, enough to garner her interest.
- But with the Bat, who caught on to her presence very quickly, as expected, of course, on her tail, right now was not the best to introduce herself to you.
- But once she was free of the Bat and his sidekicks, she would have you. Whether you were willing or not, well, that’d depend on how clever you really are and if you fail to meet her expectations, she’d dispose of you pretty quickly.
- Shiva is an incredibly unpredicatable yandere and that’s what makes her so delicious. At any given moment during the beginning of the “honeymoon process”, aka the kidnapping, there is quite the possibility that she may kill you. She likes her clever little thing but if you stop being clever, she won’t be interested in you and losing her interest is a very dangerous thing.
- But you’ll always be her clever little thing, even when you’re tired and sleepy and the last thing you want to do is appease this crazy assassin lady who’s hellbent on making you hers. If you fail to meet her expectations with your lovely sarcastic retorts or you intelligent conversation and you’re exhausted, like a melted puddle of sweet-looking ice cream on the couch after a hard day binging an entire season of a new show you started-- well, she won’t mind turning a blind eye. She’ll be surprisingly gentle, picking you up and carrying you to bed, tucking you in and softly brushing the strands of hair out of your face.
- She takes great care of your health, makes sure you’re clean and neat at all times. She will judge the shit out of you if you have any unhealthy habits and in the beginning, she’ll do everything to purge them out of you, teaching your mental techniques to stop your cravings, etc. But after a while of living with her and once she’s got her guard down with you (the only person in the world who gets to witness such a sight), she’ll indulge you occasionally.
- Wherever she goes, you go. If there’s a target in Spain that needs to be killed or if she wants to go to the middle of the mountains to a temple where the greatest martial artists are said to be born from, she’ll go right there with you on her shoulders like a sack of potatoes. No one would be daring enough to hurt you anyway. You’re Lady Shiva’s darling. Lady Shiva’s. Even the great Deathstroke does not attempt to fight the greatest martial artist in the world.
- If someone does, that poor fool better run or he will suffer a fate worse than death. Lady Shiva won’t tolerate anyone hurting you, much less disrespecting you. Even if it’s an old drunkard in the middle of the streets getting a bit too handsy with you, she won’t show mercy. He’d be sitting in a puddle of his own blood soon enough, hand cut off and decaying beside him-- of course, not that you’d know.
- She enjoys the fire in your eyes and she loves pushing and taunting your boundaries, but even she knows that those fires will turn into dying embers if you witness the savage side of the world. She wants to preserve the light in you and if she has to hide stuff behind your back, so be it.
- And hey, maybe you could help tempt her into saving a few people here and there if you beg, too. You could do that with all the villains, really. They don’t mind having a few losses here and there if it means they get the privelege of seeing you beg so prettily. You’d be quite surprised by the extent to which their adoration for you goes. Some might say it’s a bit worse than the batfam’s, though, the villains’ deep devotion is hidden in the darkness, lurking in alleyways and shadows.
Man, that is a lot of writing! I hope you all enjoy it! Feel free to send me anything you’d like me to babble on and on about. These guys are my favourite yanderes and I’m always open to writing thousands of words for them!! :)
I Have Missed You
Fandom: DC, Batman, Batfamily, Damian Wayne, al Ghul!Reader
Word Count: 3016
Thank you to @kitty-chan33 for the wonderful request!
al Ghul!Reader Masterlist
It had been nearly a year since you had been tasked with your current assignment. Nearly six months since you had been home to see your family. But when you are given a mission from the Demon’s Head, you do not stop until it is completed. Your grandfather was not the kind of man you disappointed or failed.
You knew he had only sent you away because you were getting stronger, the magic you had inherited from your late father growing more powerful every day. As much as you knew Ra’s al Ghul would never show any form of weakness in front of his men, you had caught the looks of concern or worry he gave you when he found you practicing your magic. When he saw the things you could do. The things that, at the moment, you were doing for him. But you were both very aware of the fact that could change at a moment’s notice.
Despite the fact you had never met your father and thus, had no allegiance to him. Despite the fact Ra’s had tracked down and killed him even before you were born once it was discovered your mother was pregnant by the leader of a splinter group of the League of Assassins. Despite the fact that you had been completely loyal to your grandfather your entire life, he still did not trust you. Which meant that once you returned, there would be another mission, another assignment which would take you far away from the League and those you held dear. But for now, all you wanted to do was to go home and see your family again.
Just then, your phone rang and you glanced at the caller ID. Well, speak of the devil…or the devil’s daughter.
You answered the phone on the second ring. “Mother.”
“So, you have finished your assignment?”
Nice to hear your voice too after almost half a year without any communication. “Yes. The last of the people on Grandfather’s list has been dealt with.”
“Good. Then return home so you can give your full report.”
You could tell she was about to hang up so you quickly asked, “May I speak to Damian?”
“Mother? Did something happen to Damian?”
“……No. He is perfectly fine.”
“Then may I speak with him?”
“He is not here.”
Your mother was not normally this evasive, or at least not with you. Something was obviously going on with your younger brother that she didn’t want to share with you. So, you continued prodding her, “Well, where is he?”
“I have sent him to live with his father.”
“It was about time they met, and I need my beloved distracted for what I have planned next. It is the perfect melding of events.”
You fought back the urge to roll your eyes. Of course, your mother had an ulterior motive for finally telling Wayne he had a son. Honestly, you were surprised she hadn’t played this card much sooner. “How long has he been there?”
“I brought him to Gotham just after your last visit.”
“SIX MONTHS AGO! He’s been living there for six months and you failed to tell me!”
“I did not see why it would make a difference. You were not around so there was no reason you needed to know. You would have only worried, and it would have distracted you from your mission. And you know how your grandfather despises distractions.”
You signed heavily, knowing she was right. “Well, how is he? How is he adjusting to things in Gotham? Does he like it there?”
“I have not personally spoken to him, but the intel I have been collecting makes it seem as though he is flourishing in his new home.”
“You haven’t even checked in since you dumped him at a stranger’s house?”
Now it was your mother’s turn to sigh. “As I said, I have been keeping tabs on the situation. If anything was amiss, I would not hesitate to bring him back. However, after a brief adjustment period, he has settled in very nicely with his father and his wards. And of course, Jason is back in Gotham as well, so he was not without a familiar face.”
“Yes, because living on an entirely new continent is fine as long as you know one person.”
“I would not have left him without making certain he was alright!” Your mother snapped at you. “Regardless of what you may think of me, I love both of you children more than anything in this world. If I thought for one moment that my son was in danger or in distress, I would have personally brought him home regardless of the consequences.”
An unusual feeling of remorse blooms in your chest. What your mother said was true and you knew it. Talia al Ghul may not be a typical mother, but she had always done what was best for you and your brother. And if she said that Damian was safe, then he was. She would not allow anything less to be the case.
“I-I am sorry, Mother. I know you love us and would not do anything to put us in harm’s way. This all just came as a shock to me. Please forgive me for overstepping.”
“It is alright, my love. I understand.” She grew quiet for a moment. “Your grandfather knows you were close to taking care of the last name on his list. I can buy you a few days before you will have to be back here to report, but that is all.”
“Wait, are you saying…”
“Go. Check on your brother. And tell him…. tell him I miss him.”
“I will, Mother. Thank you. And… I have missed you as much as I have missed Damian.”
“And I have missed you, my darling girl. Safe travels and hurry home.” And with that, the line went dead.
With a sigh, you gathered all of your things and left the safe house. It was time for you to finally visit Gotham City. It was time for you to see your brother.
Breaking into Wayne Manor had been much easier than anticipated. But then again, your mother had numerous files on every aspect of the Batfamily, including the layout and security measures of their home base. Getting down to the Batcave was slightly more difficult, but still only took a few minutes.
As you gazed around the vast room, you had to admit, you were somewhat impressed. Trophies from previous bouts filled the space as well as various displays of weapons, costumes, and vehicles. You could definitely find some items that piqued your interest given enough time.
However, time was not on your side. Two men, well boys, came out of one of the side rooms. One was older, taller, and wearing a tight-fitting black and blue costume while the other was younger, and all-around smaller in a red and black costume with a cape. You moved slowly until you were standing before them and they both jumped in surprise.
“Who the hell are you and how did you get in here?” The one in the black and blue suit slammed what appeared to be an alarm button on the wall as he stared at you.
Ignoring the questions, you simply stated. “I have come for Damian Wayne.”
“Yeah, well too bad. The kid’s not going anywhere with you.” The taller of the two drew two escrima sticks while the shorter one grabbed a bo staff that was leaning against the wall.
“You really believe that you are a match for me?” You scoffed slightly as they nodded. “We shall see.”
Pulling out the dual blades concealed on your hip, you dropped into an attack stance. And after a moment’s hesitation, both boys charged at you. You just smirked as you stood your ground and waited for them to reach you.
How easy it would have been to just kill them both where they stood. How quickly you could have ended this fight with just a single thrust of your blade or squeeze of your hand. But you knew that these people were part of your brother’s life now and you doubted he would appreciate you ending their lives. So, you resigned yourself to staying on the defensive, only making small jabs or knicks but nothing that would leave any lasting damage. Neither one of them managed to land a single blow on you though, which was not surprising. You had been fighting opponents twice their size and skill for most of your life.
“Dick! Tim! Stop, now!” A voice suddenly rang out through the cavernous space. Both boys looked confused but stepped away from you as they were instructed.
You lowered your blades as you gave a curt nod to the man who had just materialized from out of the shadows. “Bruce.”
You hadn’t seen the Bat since before Damian was born, yet it didn’t surprise you that he recognized you even now that you were no longer the child he had met back then.
The older of the two you had been sparring with, Dick, seemed shocked. “Wait, you know her?”
“Yes. She is known as the Demon’s Claw, Ra’s al Ghul’s most feared and trusted assassin. But she’s also-”
“Sister?” All eyes turned to the small boy who was coming down the stairs.
“- Talia’s daughter.” Bruce finished.
“Damian…” you breathed a soft sigh of relief at the sight of your brother. For the first time since you arrived, the harsh, cold expression slipped from your face and a slight smile replaced it.
As he launched himself in your direction, you closed the distance between you and scooped him into your chest.
“I have missed you.” He muttered into your neck as his small arms wound tightly around you.
“And I you. I had finally completed my mission and when I called to check in, Mother told me you had been living here these past six months. I did not want to disturb this new life you are making for yourself but I….I longed to see you.”
“You are never a disturbance.” He turned to glare at the two other boys. “And if anyone has a problem with you being here, they will have to deal with me.”
Both Dick and Tim held up their hands defensively. Dick said, “Hey, as long as B doesn’t have a problem with her being here, then neither do we.” Tim nodded in agreement.
“Good,” Damian said bluntly. Then he turned back to you. “How long are you here for? Does Grandfather know about your visit?”
You hesitated slightly. “He does not. Mother is buying me some time before I have to report to him so I will not be able to stay long. But she sends her love and says to tell you that she misses you.”
The boy’s face fell. “Oh. I thought…”
“I know. I am sorry, little one.” You ran your hand gently across his cheek. “I wish it could be longer but at least we have some time together.” He hugged you tightly once more.
Pulling him in close so only he could hear your next words, you whispered, “How are you, really? Are you okay with being here? Are you happy? Just say the word and we will leave tonight.”
“At first it was difficult. Everything here is so different than back home. But now….” Damian looked up at you. “Yes, I am happy here. I miss you and Mother and Grandfather, but I have come to enjoy the life I have made here. I-I wish to stay.”
There was a small tugging in your chest as you realized how much you were hoping he would ask to come home with you. Yet, if this was his wish, you would respect it. However, it did ease your mind to know that for all these months, he hadn’t been in distress or mistreated.
Suddenly, a new figure came soaring into the cave on a motorcycle which skidded to a stop just inches from the wall. In seconds, he was off the machine and rushing towards the crowd of people. However, as soon as the eyes behind the red helmet landed on you, he slid to a stop.
Ripping off the hood, he exclaimed in surprise and confusion, “Y/N!”
“Jason.” You peeled yourself out of your brother’s arms and took a few steps towards your old pupil.
He met you halfway and threw his arms around you. You stiffened slightly at his embrace but did not pull away. “What the hell are you doing here?”
“I came to see my brother. Truthfully, I did not anticipate you would be here. Last I had heard, you and your father were on the outs.”
“He’s not my father.” Jason snapped, but then he softened slightly. “And I’m only here because I saw the alarm was triggered. I should have guessed you’d be coming around sooner or later. That kid’s your life. Though, honestly, I’m surprised Ra’s let you off your leash.”
You bristled slightly at his words, pulling away from him. You had forgotten how Jason’s jokes and sarcastic comments could sometimes border on cruel, though you knew he didn’t mean anything by it.
He seemed to realize how his words affected you though because he immediately tried to backtrack. “What I meant was, because he always keeping such a close eye on you. Because you were so… good… at what you…do…”
You could see he was trying so you gave him a small nod. “You are right. My grandfather does not know that I am here and I sincerely doubt he would approve. However, I needed to make sure Damian was in good hands.”
Now it was Jason’s turn to bristle at your words. “What? You think that I’d let something happen to him? Do you really think so little of me?”
“Of course not. But I know your relationship with Bruce is complicated, thus I was not sure how much you and Damian would see each other. How much he could lean on you if need be.”
“The kid knows he can come to me for anything. I check in on him all the time.”
“Do not lie, Todd. You only stop by when you think Alfred has food you can steal.” Damian called from his position near the stairs.
You arched your eyebrow at Jason as the vigilante’s face grew as red as his helmet. “Well, I still check on you when I’m here, don’t I?”
As the two of you joined the rest of the group, Dick asked, “So you know Jason too?”
You glanced between your brother and your student, unsure of how much they had divulged with the rest of the Bats. “I do not know if it is my place to say.”
“She was one of my masters while I was a part of the League of Assassins. She taught me almost everything I learned there.” Jason said, flashing you a smile.
“Really?” Tim asked.
“Yes, Jason was an excellent student when he learned to shut his mouth and listen,” you replied.
Both Dick and Tim tried suppressing chuckles, as Dick said, “Yep, that sounds like Jay.”
Jason began to give a snarky retort but you cut him off, “However, the real question is not whether or not you learned, but how much you remember.”
You turned suddenly, taking Jason by surprise as you swept his legs out from under him, causing him to crash heavily to the ground. This time, Dick and Tim howled with laughter as Jason groaned from the floor. Even Bruce had a small smile on his face.
You tutted in disappointment as you rose back to your full height. “You have grown lax since you left us. I thought I taught you better than that.” You extended a hand to help him to his feet.
Jason scowled up at you. “Yeah, well, you just caught me temporarily off guard. But I’m still as skilled as ever.”
His hand tightened around yours and you could see what he was about to try. As he yanked you towards the floor, you used the momentum to drop into a roll and fling him over you, causing him to land once more on the flat of his back. Dick and Tim’s laughter ceased immediately. Instead, they were both just staring slack-jawed at you. But you ignored them as you towered over Jason.
With a groan, he sat up slowly, “Ok, maybe I have gotten a little rusty.”
You feel the corners of your mouth twitch up slightly. Besides Damian, Jason was the only other person who could regularly cause you to produce even the semblance of a smile. And you had missed your old student more than you cared to admit since he had returned to Gotham. “Perhaps I can give you a few refreshers while I am here.”
Jason blinked in surprise. “You’re staying?”
“Not for long. As I was just telling Damian, I must return soon report to Grandfather. But I will remain in this city for a few days at least. I wish to spend more time with my brother. However, I always have time to knock you down a few pegs.” Your smile grew a little wider as Jason chuckled.
He shot his “brothers” a mischievous look. “I think you should show them what a real fighter can do.”
You eyed Dick and Tim up and down as they shifted uncomfortably in place. “We shall see. But for now-” you walked over and offered your hand to Damian. “-I believe I would like some alone time with my brother.”
He happily took your hand and began leading you up the stairs into the manor itself. And in this moment, you let everything else fall away. No more thoughts of leaving soon, returning home, or facing your grandfather. No more worries about the future or your next assignment. Right now, you were here with your brother. And that was the only thing that mattered.
Kinda dying over Jason participating in the weird ninja therapy session at the end of the episode is ras actually trying to help Jason be less murderous
ra's al ghul, banging pots and pans: it's therapy time bitches!!! time to meditate on our past actions and seek redemption through healing!!!
jason, who can't even remember his own middle name: ok
Facts on Jason Todd Most People Forget About
Facts on Damian Wayne Most People Forget About
Click Images for better quality!!
Due to being immersed in the Lazarus Pits, Jason possesses some magical abilities.
*Magic Negation - Jason was taught a powerful, arcane martial arts strike by Talia al Ghul that only a force of true good is capable of delivering. This technique was created by Ducra, as a way to strip away the powers of the Untitled.
*Summoning - Jason possesses the unique ability to summon the All-Blades - A pair of mystical blades manifested from Jason's own soul, designed to kill magic-based threats. The blades can only be summoned in the presence of true evil. Jason has even shown the ability to summon dozens of All-Blades at once.
Deception - According to Batman, Jason is a skilled liar
Jason ran the Iceberg Lounge for a short time. He was called "The Prince of Gotham".
Jason is able to hack into LexCorp computers in less than five minutes.
He has Genius Level Intellect
He can vomit on command
Jason was taught by Batman to pick locks in his second week of training.
Jason is a master martial artist, having received training from many of the world's most skilled fighters, including Batman, Nightwing, Bronze Tiger, Lady Shiva and the All-Caste.
He was considered the All-Caste's most successful pupil, earning him respect and secrets only he has been able to unlock. Even Damian, who doesn't have a very high opinion of Jason, considers his older brother to be one of the greatest fighters to have ever lived. As part of his Robin training, Bruce taught Jason a technique called "language of combat," wherein he can communicate with others while fighting. Jason is skilled enough to beat a weakened Deathstroke, and even Ra's in combat. Jason admits that whenever he fought Batman, he always held back due to their relationship.
Dim Mak - Jason is skilled in this ancient form of martial arts where you strike vital points of the opponent's body causing paralysis, intense and prolonged pain or death. He was taught a specific nerve strike technique by Lady Shiva, that allows him to instantly paralyze an opponent. Other martial arts he knows are Eskrima, Kung Fu, Muay Thai, Tae Kwon Do and Wing Chun.
Jason is Multilingual. (his Portuguese has gotten rusty over the years)
Jason is knowledgeable on various mystical concepts, due to his training with the All-Caste.
Through intense training, Jason has trained his body to the natural pinnacle of human physical prowess. His physical attributes roughly exceeded that of an Olympic level athlete. His strength, speed, stamina, agility, reflexes and coordination are at peak human perfection. He has displayed on multiple occasions that he is quick enough to dodge point-blank gunfire.
Jason is highly skilled with most weapons, though he usually favors using his dual handguns. He is skilled in knife-fighting, and can use virtually any common object as an improvised weapon, such as baseball bats, chains, a crowbar, and even a flag pole.
Jason is a highly skilled marksman. Unlike most of the Batman Family, Red Hood is one of few who has no problems with the use of firearms.
Due to his training over the years, Jason is a master swordsman.
He has even been able to keep up with the likes of Ra's in a sword dual, and even disarm him.
Jason Todd has a confirmed kill count of 83
Jason spent time in Arkham Asylum, where he had therapy sessions with Dr. Quinzel. Though when this happened exactly is unknown.
Jason kept the tire he originally stole from the Batmobile.
Jason's blood type is O-
Jason (and in addition the Outlaws; Artemis and Bizarro) was drafted on to Amanda Waller's Suicide Squad after getting arrested by Batwoman and the Gotham Knights.
Jason earned Talia's respect and managed to impress her further by perfectly performing a fighting move invented by the All-Caste that even she couldn't master. (this was back in "Zero Year".)
Jason broke out of Supergirl's grip twice (the first time she wasn't expecting it, yet the second time she was prepared, yet he still got out of her grip) with her stating "I thought you were normal like Batman... no "normal" human is strong enough to do that". He also snuck away from her despite her having super hearing.
He once tossed Bane with a leg grapple. Bane is estimated to weigh around 250 - 350 pounds.
Jason has an open invitation to join the League of Assassins at any time.
Jason once broke off the neck and arm of a large Talon. Note that Jason was the only one to beat a Talon on his own at this time, while Damian defeated one with two others and Tim was stilling fighting his.
Lex gave total custody of Bizarro to Jason and Artemis. (Image here x)
After being apprehended by the authorities, Jason passed all psych evaluations at Arkham Asylum and was then transferred to a Gotham prison. Upon his arrival though, suicide rates spiked within the prison. The result of pure fear on the inmates part. As Rorschach once said “ I'm not locked in here with you, you're locked in here with me ” and I can't think of anything that would better describe this situation.
Jason has a punch taught by the All-Caste that removes someones power and immortality. He once used this punch on Ra's.
According to Tim Drake of the future, after being killed by the Joker, one of Jason's bones was never set right, which caused a growing and devastating bone spur in his hip joint.
It's been said that during his time as Robin, Jason was an occasional smoker.
Jason Todd is one of the only in-cannon characters to ever be able to sneak up on Deathstroke and match him in combat.
EDIT (5/6/22): This kinda adds on to the other points on Jason's strength.
He's strong enough to break through a submarine hull with a single punch
Effortlessly lift a man over his head with one hand and throw him several meters through an airplane window.
Casually kick an airplane door off the hinges while it's flying.
Sent Deathstroke flying with a kick. (i'll get never over the fact their was a mouth on his helmet :/)
Break the neck and arm of a superhuman Talon.
Throw an alien with one hand.
Flip Susie Sue on her head (she weighs over 600 lbs).
Hold the roof of a collapsed building.
Support the weight of a enormous cruise missile for an extended period of time.
Cut a dinosaur's head off with one slice.
Overpowered a large group of Venom-users
Struck Lobo to the floor
He can apply practically superhuman force in his physical attacks to match Meta-human super-soldiers like Ravager (who easily has the strength of 10 men, possibly a dozen or more).
obssessed with what if idea of bruce and talia staying married and raising damian together—imagine the chaos, imagine all the love spread, imagine the comedy.
like if we're doing math and we're setting this in post-crisis, when damian was born, bruce was still in his early 20s and by now he already had 14 year old dick grayson,
so imagine dick, by now adopted for 2 years and robin of circa a year and half, finding out bruce and talia gotten married, and then few months later they're expecting a baby, like he's been the only child for all 14 years of his life, suddenly he has to be a big brother, and i think it'd create tensions at first, with the baby being biological child and his dislike of talia,
but then after a while, dick comes to bruce and talia's bedroom bringing them both breakfast in bed while talia is reading a book and bruce is dead to the world because idiot batman, and talia is a bit confused but dick goes on and on about how while she isn't his favourite person, her health and the health of the baby come first so he'd decided to be the best teenage older brother ever, and so he bonds with both talia and bruce over getting manor ready for the baby, and whenever he's with the titans he gives them updates about his baby sibling and rants how they'll have to visit ra's after the baby is born and he can't stand the man's ego
spring turns into summer and one night in august talia goes into labour, and bruce, the overachiever in worrying, calls half a league to witness his baby being born and when talia's obgyn announces it's a healthy baby boy, both dick and bruce jump into clark's arms, and alfred and ra's are awkwardly congratulating to each other
damian is a happy and a spoiled baby, with both being very loved and very rich, but because his whole family tries their best, he slowly grows up in a fine boy, a chaotic toddler who climbs his father like a tree and yells at his papa, a whiny toddler who cries when his mama says they can't visit the kent farm and their cows this weekend, and a happy toddler who takes naps with his teenage brother
now imagine the chaos when one autumn night bruce leaves to honor his parents he finds himself in the crime alley and instead of spending the night remembering his parents' murder, all memories he has of that night is of the small angry orphan, and when he comes home alfred and talia are waiting for him and he doesn't even wait before telling them about this boy he met and talia is curious about the child that made bruce forget about his own parents
as soon as ma gunn was sent to prison, bruce's begging talia to adopt the kid, talia can't you see he made me laugh on my parents' death anniversary, he called me a boob while trying to steal the tires off batmobile, we need this kid, and talia, trying to be rational, asks if he can take care of another angry and traumatized orphan while taking care of a 3 year old and fighting crime in his free time and bruce of course promises, and the moment talia and jason meet you can feel the love between them and when damian approvingly climbs jason like a tree it's settled their boy is theirs
and then dick, a literal 17 year old who left the role of robin, needs to meet this kid and he's still at odds at bruce because they've been fighting about general things, bruce not wanting dick to fight crime after he almost died and dick wanting to be taken seriously as nightwing now, and bruce wanting dick to have a uni degree, and it's what it is
dick isn't sure of jason at first, mostly cause by now jason has started his training as a robin, but damian likes him, and if damian, and even talia like the kid, dick would live by his name and that'd be the worst—cue to the waynes becoming even bigger family
because of talia and bruce having mostly alright marriage, jason wouldn't probably rush into ethiopia and he'd talk to talia who'd come with him and when they'd meet sheila she'd try to be nice but then she'd smell a trap and together she and jason would definitely beat up joker and put sheila behind the bars—jason's pretty not okay because another mother figure in his life traumatised him, and by now all members of the family except bruce regularly go to therapy
family is a bit shaken but when batman finds their neighbors the drakes dead and almost dead it's an instict for bruce and talia to offer themselves as a foster family to the little boy drake—cue comedy once again because everyone is trying very hard not to spill abiut their nightlife, even damian who is four years old, but then it all hilariously falls apart when dick catches tim trying to get into batcave and then the old clock doors open and jason comes out the batcave and it's just crickets
ra's al ghul doesn't need a lazarus pit he just needs whatever the hell tim is doing to stay 17 forever
THEY LOOK SO HAPPY!! 😭💗
The batfam makes decisions based on who Ra's called "detective" most recently. For bad things, the one called "detective" the furthest back. Obviously Bruce is always disqualified, but for the kids it is fair game.
Who gets the last piece of pie
Who gets the front seat (WFA I am looking at you)
Who has to go with Bruce to a gala
Who has to pick up the batarangs
And so on. It is an oddly fair system
Talia: Why are you awake?
Damian: *hides the thing behind him*
Talia: *sighs knowing what it is* Damian
Damian: *shows her the cub on his hands*
Talia: My child, our warehouse is already full and-
Damian: *for the first time makes his puppy eyes*
The stolen pink flamingo is on her bedroom
Bruce: What are you doing here Damian
Damian: *hides it behind him*
Bruce: I saw that
Damian: *shows him the puppy*
Bruce: We already have two dogs Damian
Damian: *makes his puppy eyes* Dad
Bruce: Of course what ever you want!
Dick: Hey, why are you one the roof? *preocupied he gets closer to Damian*
Damian: *hides something behind his back*
Dick: *raises his eyebrows*
Damian: *shows him the cat*
Dick: *sighs* You have to talk with-
Damian: *uses his puppy eyes*
Dick: I'll talk to him, now let me take a picture...
Ra's: Hello Grandson-
Damian: *hides the thing he brought over for the holidays*
Ra's: Ra's al Ghul knows what he saw child
Damian: *throws him the turkey*
Ra's: TALIAAAA!!! *the turkey starts poking him in the eye
Tim: *is laughing in the security camera*
Talia: too busy with her Beloved
Ra's with a baby Talia like an actual baby Talia is my favourite dynamic because he's this big scary immortal and he's doing his best to do his whole "OHHH im going to end the world I'm going to kill everyone I'm so big and scary" thing with these other big and scary charicters in DC and he's just got a baby with him
Ra's and Talia the most haunted people on earth by this logic
That's just Jason in different costumes
More like Ra's rambles on why spearfishing is superior while Goliath goes ham and Damian ignores them
click for better quality ~ prev - next
When Bruce tries to be a good father...
Bruce Wayne: *sitting by his desk and reviewing papers*
Bruce Wayne: Hello?
Talia al Ghul: Beloved, hello.
Bruce Wayne: Talia, hello to you too. To what do I owe the pleasure?
Talia al Ghul: I'm calling about our son. He's not answering my calls and he's turned off his tracker again.
Bruce Wayne: Isn't he at that tournament, on Lazarus Island? Talia, Damian's been—
Talia al Ghul: I know where Damian is. We're in contact and he visited father recently. I didn't ask about him, I'm asking about Jason.
Bruce Wayne: Jason?
Talia al Ghul: Yes, Jason, our son. Where is he?